I say less. Perhaps because—I suspect—I feel more. If I were to put words to it, we’d be in deep waters indeed.
Emma Donoghue, Reader, I Married Him: Stories Inspired by Jane Eyre; from ‘Since First I Saw Your Face’
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Do you want to hear the single most romantic conversation I have ever had?
Husband: you said the other day that the castle they filmed the Princess Bride is in England?
Me: yeah?
Husband: so it's not really a castle, it's a stately home but you can do a tour of all the bits they filmed and the 'as you wish' hill
Me: oooh
Husband: and from the top of the manor you can see Chatsworth House which is where they filmed -
Me: -my favourite pride and prejudice adaptation
Husband: and it turns out that that is only an hour from the potter that makes that birthday set you're collecting, and they've got a factory shop for the rarer pieces
Husband, (who 'doesn't mind' princess bride, suffers through pride and prejudice, and thinks my birthday plates are 'okay I guess') : so if you get a Monday off we could drive down next month?
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Sean and I have been married nearly 16 years. We did not take a honeymoon when we got married. We bought a reliable car instead (it's parked outside right now). We have actually never taken a honeymoon. I made some joke about it the other night, and Sean said:
"Honey, we're living our honeymoon."
Is it bigamy if I marry him a second time?? Because I might not care.
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Of course, I couldn���t pass up this anthology of short stories based on Jane Eyre.
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From the Hedwig Household
We’re watching The Sandman, and unprompted darling husband looked over from the screen to me and said in his deeply earnest way:
“more men should wear eyeliner.”
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Me: Oh no.
Spouse: What?
Me: Recently I spent about 5 days continuously earwormed with the music to the landing sequence in Alien. It wasn’t bad! I love that music! When I wasn’t trying to sleep. Anyway, rewatching Coma with its late-70s Jerry Goldsmith score has…
Spouse: Reactivated your earworm?
Me: We are going in for a landing on LV-426, yes.
Spouse, activating home theatre: The only cure for too much Goldsmith is…
Home Theatre: 🎼Thirteenth Warrior Soundtrack🎶
Spouse: MORE GOLDSMITH!!!
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iam sorry miss matteo pessina, you may have converted me into a football fan but i am unable to get into star wars
thanks for sticking around anyway
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can you write miles 42 having readers bank account, card ALL that on his phone and gets mad if she purchases shi with money he didint give her. its really crazy but its miles 42....what do you expect??? hehe
Sure love!!!
A/n: y’all I love you so much but I need you guys to start requesting regular miles fanfic pls. Although 42 miles owns my 🩷
It was just a simple necklace. It was the Vivienne Westwood necklace that you saw everyone around you wearing and wanted so badly. You knew Miles would get it for you in a heartbeat but a part of you wanted to get it for yourself. It had been a long, stressful semester but you struggled through it all and got to a point where ou were passing with A’s and B’s. Coincidentally, you had gotten a job at Starbucks after months of applying and you had about $1000 saved up of your own money that you were waiting to spend on something special. That was, until that “something special” came along in the form of Miles.
You never knew what he did but you knew he was making 8x your salary in a month. It seemed like anything you wanted, you got when you were with Miles; shoes, clothes, books, makeup any and everything you wanted, it was yours in a matter of days. It’s worth mentioning that Miles is extremely overprotective and wants to know everything about what you’re doing and buying because he loves you and cares about your habits.
Even on Miles’s birthday when you dipped into your savings to get him the latest Jordan’s, he was furious that you had to use your own money:
“Damn Ma, these are valid. How much were they?”
“Oh don’t worry about it” you said
“I said, how much were they.” His eyes narrowing in on you because he knew how much they were because he was gonna buy them 2 weeks ago but decided not to.
“$500. I’ve been saving for them for you, baby. It’s all good” you tried to assure him
“Aight. thank you.” He said, pulling you close to him, the scent of the Dior Sauvage cologne you also bought him, filling your nostrils
But deep down you knew he was pissed off and mad that you spent your own money, so after a long talk about how he should be able to keep tabs on you and keep you safe, you gave him your Apple Pay and banking info for emergencies only but of course it’s Miles and being the overprotective boyfriend he is, he checks it everyday for any “extravagant purchases” made by you or someone else.
Of course he isn’t crazy, he set a $25 limit for you before he steps in and asks what’s up. Once, you were at a mall with your friend and found the cutest shirt at Urban Outfitters and decided to buy it. The price tag read $50 but you went ahead and got it; the same happened at Bath and Body Works and Tilly’s and as you made your way to the bathroom, you got a text from Miles:
Miles: did someone take your card?
You: no why??
Miles: why’d you spend $150 in an hour??
You: I’m at the mall
Miles: so? I pay for your shit
You: dawg it’s $150. It’s not that deep 💀
Miles: I ain’t yo “dawg” and yes it is when Yk I buy you shit
You: you aren’t my sugar daddy
Miles: I basically am atp. I’m sending you $1000, buy something cute
You contemplated leaving him on seen but you remembered how he hates that so you replied:
You: Okay
You had saved up enough to get the necklace and when you got it, you were ecstatic. You thought about all of the possible outfit combos and how good it will look against your brown skin but your thoughts were interrupted by a certain someone:
Miles: what’d I tell you, Mami?
You: ?
Miles: don’t play dumb, yk I would’ve bought you that necklace in a heartbeat but instead you wanted to be miss independent and buy it yourself. I guess since you’re so independent, I’ll stop sending you that $1000 every week. How about that?
You: ok
Miles: ?
You: we can discuss this when I get home
Miles: K
You: k
It was a long ride home but eventually you accepted that Miles was gonna rip your head off and there wasn’t anything you could do about it.
When you got home, he had three of the necklaces, two huge teddy bears, a bouquet of your favorite flowers and the newest pair of Jordan’s waiting for you:
“What’s all this?” You smiled and asked
“I told you I’ll pay for your shit, y/n” miles said, with a small smirk on his face
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While out doing our weekly grocery shopping today, my husband bought a back scratcher thingy for me and a pair of Christmas socks for my sister. Just because. He has his faults, but he is so freaking sweet on occasion.
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St. Paul says that it is better to marry than to burn, but there is marriage and there is marriage. Sometimes it may be better to burn.
Helen Dunmore, Reader, I Married Him: Stories Inspired by Jane Eyre; from ‘Grace Poole Her Testimony’
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Literally no thoughts just Gojo after your wedding carrying you over the threshold of your hotel room. You’re not leaving for your honeymoon until the morning but he nearly trips on the doorframe in his haste.
“You really don’t need to carry me—”
“But it’s tradition, we need to consummate the marriage!” he insists. Within seconds his lips are against yours and he’s fumbling with the light switch, and you finally swat his hand away and just beg him to take you to the bed.
He works the zipper of your dress down, part of him sad that he’s not going to see you in this gorgeous gown again, but then it reveals your white lace lingerie and the groan he lets out is broken and guttural and desperate.
This is far from the first time he’s seen you like this, but there’s something about this moment here and now that makes it so much more intense, so much more intimate and he just never wants to let you go.
“Satoru,” you whisper, and his breath hitches.
He leans down to capture your lips in a kiss. “Shh, I know. Just lemme take care of you, like I promised.”
And when he sees the gold band on his fourth finger pressing into the skin of your hips as he sheaths himself inside of you, he nearly loses himself, sending up a prayer to whatever gods are listening that he can keep his promise to keep you safe and happy forever.
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(shaking violently) haha, so that new trey card art......
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Multidimensional shenanigans where Jing Yuan gets forced into another timeline. Despite waking up in his own house, his own bed, Jing Yuan can tell that something is different. His bed sheets don’t smell like this, his room isn’t decorated like this. Miniature changes that Jing Yuan is unsettled by. He creeps out of the bed on guard, silently stalking through his own home- but this isn’t his home.
Not just his home, that is. He’s met with the beautiful, unusual sight of you- so this is what you look like in the morning? In the kitchen as if you belong there, comfortable and content in his robe. You’re getting out several pans, taking things out of the fridge. Making breakfast?
Perhaps he is a little caught off guard, though he doesn’t like to admit it. The scenery is wonderful, watching you so domestically work your way in his kitchen, in his clothes. He’d be a liar to say he’s never dreamed of what it would look like. But why? Why is it happening now? Why are you here?
When you turn around, you’re smiling, tutting at him while you wave a finger. ‘It’ll take more than that to scare me, a-yuan. Is this what happens when you retire? You’re losing your edge!’
He blinks. Once, twice. Since when do you call him such an endearing title? Since when is he retired?
You focus on getting things together for breakfast. ‘You’re up earlier than usual,’ you tell him, ‘so breakfast isn’t ready yet. But you can make yourself useful and feed the kids, okay?’
The kids. The kids? Jing Yuan has no choice but to admit he isn’t sure what’s happening anymore. He doesn’t recall ever having children- and with you? No, that’s something he’d remember.
Over the course of the day, Jing Yuan learns several things. The first is that ‘the kids’ refers not to human children but animal- you both have quite the collection. A handful of cats and dogs and several exotic birds. There are ducks and chickens in the back garden.
The second thing he learns is that he is married to you, and the third thing is that he is, in fact, retired. Fu Xuan is the general, and his young disciple, Yanqing, is no longer so young. He’s an adult now, making his way up the ranks with the speed and efficiency Jing Yuan always expected of him.
The last thing he learns is that this is all terrifyingly real- too complex to be a dream- but it is not his.
The first thing that comes to mind, of course, is to find a way back home. But it gets harder and harder to do so as he has to play his role of house husband with you. And this- this is something that aches. Because deep down it’s really a dream come true- this true love bloomed domesticity, shared with you. The way you look at him, your matching rings, your kiss on his cheek and hands around his waist. Affection is like second nature between the two of you, and Jing Yuan knows this not only in your examples but because if this was real, if this was his and he had you, he would do nothing else but kiss you and hold you all the time.
Jing Yuan is duty bound, though there are times he wish it wasn’t so. He has to find a way back to his home, because back home, his people still need him. Fu Xuan isn’t ready to be general yet, and Yanqing isn’t grown up. There are things he needs to do, but oh, to be selfish. To be in love with you and not worry about a thing- perhaps this is an enemies mind game, their attempt at torture. It’s certainly working.
The first week he shares with you, Jing Yuan smiles and kisses your cheek goodnight, knowing it is his role to do so, but things never go farther than that. He never holds you for too long, he never kisses your lips unless you ask him to.
He breaks your heart. After a week has passed and you’re getting ready for bed, your expression is breaking as you hold his hand and ask him what’s wrong. Why won’t he kiss you? Why won’t he touch you? Your love is too strong for something so unexpected. Too strong for secrets.
Jing Yuan is a weak man at heart. He cannot bear with hurting you, so for the time that’s allowed, he loves you. It’s a terrifying thing, because this Jing Yuan has never indulged in you before, and you are expecting someone who’s well versed in your strings. He hasn’t kissed these lips, not truly, and he hasn’t held you tight enough to appreciate your form. He is mind numbing tender with you the first night he gives in, and every night after that.
It’s almost shameful to admit that it’s better than he imagined it to be- because yes, he imagined. As previously mentioned, he is a weak man, and his mind wanders and dwells on things he cannot have. But here, he has you, and he is determined to not waste it. And if he rocks your world more intensely than usual because this sex isn’t dulled by repetition, it’s brand new; then he is happy to give that to you. You deserve every lick of pleasure you get and more.
He doesn’t know how to let it all go. When the opportunity presents itself to go back home- the man he came here as wouldn’t have hesitated. But the man he is now, changed by your touch, hesitates. He is duty bound nevertheless, and despite his own needs and wants, his hesitation, he goes back. He has to.
Waking up in his own universe is almost… pathetic. He looks around his room and realizes how empty it is, void of a life well lived in it. Your presence lifted everything up. Now, everything is stale.
Another heartbreak for something that was never his in the first place. He isn’t sure how much more he can take.
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The Quiet Part (Azul, Jade, and Trey x Yuu)
"Oh can I help you? You seem to be lost." You attempt to cheerfully ask the vaguely familiar looking person in front of you. As if he is deliberately trying to rub salt in your wounds, Crowley ignored your request to leave campus for NRC parents day and is instead making you and Grim run errands. The person in front of you, blissfully ignorant to your inner turmoil perks up at your attention.
"Forgive me for asking, but are you the magicless prefect?" You and Grim exchange a confused glance. "You've got to be right?" They're practically glowing with how happy they are to see you. " Oh I'm sorry, I've just heard so much about you!" Wait, what?
notes: they/them pronouns used for Yuu, in-law fishing (Azul and Jade) vs sibling smack down (Trey), if you liked this please check my master list here.
Azul
"Well aren't you just darling!" You fold your clipboard just a bit closer to your chest, you don't think this excitable plump lady is intending to intimidate you but she is all up in your personal space. Her pearlescent hair frames her face perfectly, nicely complementing her large black hat that reminds you of a Victorian aristocrat on her way to the opera. She just lacks the fancy cigarette case.
"Hey lady back off my hench human! You're spooking 'em!" Grim pouts with his hands on his hips but only succeeds in changing her attention to him.
"And you must be the dire beast! Simply marvelous I didn't think Zuzu would let me have a chance to see you two at all." She sighs, clearly happy in a vaguely sinister way where her familiar looking smile doesn't reach her eyes. "Oh where are my manners? I'm-"
"Mother!" A very flusterd octopus runs, well more like flails, his way up the main street towards the woman your speaking with, but she doesn't do more than wave before returning to her conversation with you.
"-Mrs. Ashengrotto! Say darling are you free for a bit?" She's back to crowding you once again while Azul moves in between the two of you. "I have been so looking forward to meeting my poopsy's friends."
"Mother please, the prefect is extremely busy. There's no need for them to show you around campus, what sort of son would I be if I-"
"That's besides the point." Mrs. Ashengrotto's smile doesn't fade but the warmth of her voice most certainly does. Still Azul remains firm, extending an arm to keep you from moving towards his mother, or maybe to keep her from closing in on you? "You can't expect me to not be curious! You never have written such glowing things about-"
"That's enough mother." Grim yanks on your pant leg and points towards the path to Sam's shop.
"It is not poopsy you can't just ask for advice and then refuse every opportunity to use it." Mrs. Ashengrotto huffs in disappointment and elegantly shakes her finger as you and Grim begin to slowly inch away.
"I have no idea what it is you are talking about mother," Azul pushes his glasses further up his face, silently pleading with you to run faster "and I am certain the prefect doesn't either so please, allow me to escort you to the Monstro Lounge that you have been so eager to see." His mother pouts, pouts! At him puffing her cheeks up with air before finally looking behind him and realizing you aren't there.
"Oh absolutely not, I am not letting this fish out of my net." She mutters muscling her son out of the way. "Yoo hoo! Darling are you certain you can't at least stay for dinner?"
"Mother!"
"Or maybe forever?"
"MOTHER!"
Jade
"Well now, this is a surprise, watcha doin here Jade?" Grim asks as you step foot into the Pomefiore lounge. Normally asking Jade anything is akin to sticking your foot in your mouth but you have to admit, you are sort of curious why Jade and Vil, the two most composed people on campus, are standing awkwardly in the corner clearly a bit out of place while two men you assume are their father's seem to be having a grand time chatting it up on the couch. Disturbingly, Jade makes eye contact with you with a look you almost think is screaming for help.
"Yoooo!" The Leech father is tall, and the speed with which he snaps up off the couch and approaches you does not help at all with his naturally intimidating aura. "You've gotta be the prefect right? Mr. Leech!" He extends a hand and you look at Jade who just smiles at you as you gingerly take his father's hand and immediately regret it with how he nearly snaps your arm off with his hand shake.
"Um yes that's me, can I help you?" You wince and try to avoid rolling your wrist too much. Mr. Leech looks a bit confused.
"Mhm? Don't you have any folks visiting today?" You look at Jade who reluctantly draws attention to himself with a cough.
"Their situation is a bit unique father." You're thankful Jade doesn't say more than that
"Well why didn't you say that? Now I look like an ass." Mr. Leech claps the back of his head and mutters. "And here I had everything I wanted to say to the in laws planned out already, shit." He turns back to you with a smile and Vil's dad lets out an elegant laugh.
"From a certain point of view that makes your task easier no?" Vil's father says as Jade reluctantly moves out of the corner towards his father, clearly looking for an excuse to get him out of Vil's hair.
"If you are done saying hello to your friend, would you like to see some of the mountain lover's club projects?" Jade asks, already gently herding him towards the door as his father shrugs.
"Sure, you coming kid?" Why is he looking at you and why is Jade giving you that strange look again? "Jade's told his mom all about your hikes, gotta admit I don't really get the appeal myself but it sounds like you two have a grand old time with it."
"The headmage technically has me-" Mr. Leech wraps one arm around your shoulder and another around Jade's and resumes the march towards the door.
"Aww don't worry about that!" It's clear you aren't getting out of this with just how terrified Grim is, he's practically rooted to his spot as Mr. Leech loosens his grip to wave over his shoulder at Vil and his dad. "See ya next Sunday Eric!"
"Good luck! Don't scare them off!"
Trey
Two small children stare up at you with sharp eyes, judgmentally you think but you can't be too sure. "You are the prefect right?" Asks the little boy, definitely judgmentally. "I thought you would be prettier or at least more handsome."
"Hey!" snaps his sister, who doesn't hesitate to hit him in a display that you are sure would give her parents a headache. "Big brother never lies to us about stuff!" Her brother scowls and rubs his head.
"Big brother lies all the time, what else do you call those 'secret ingredients' of his?" He goes back to staring you down and you and Grim exchange a look.
"Yeah but not to us." The little girl crosses her arms and stares her brother down sternly. "He would never lie about something like that. Besides did you see how dopey he looks when he talks about them?" The little boy looks away from you with a pout, almost like you stole his toy or something while his sister rolls her eyes. "It is so obvious- you would absolutely know if you were a girl."
"That's got nothing to do with it! I'm just worried you know, it's important to make sure they pass the sniff test." He looks like he is questioning if he can get away with hitting his sister in front of you as you desperately look around for any sign of these kids' parents. "You would totally know if you were a boy."
"Uhhh hench human," Grim poorly whispers "you don't think these two are..." he doesn't finish his sentence but as you both examine the bickering duo you start to note all the little similarities between them and-
"Hey you two aren't causing problems on purpose are you?" Trey looks down sternly on the two kids who completely ignore his tone and jump on him immediately.
"TREY!"
"Are you gonna show us the hedgehogs?!" squeals the little girl.
"Forget that, I wanna see the Coliseum!" cheers the little boy. You breathe a sigh of relief, and wave to Trey getting ready to continue your patrol when the little girl looks after you confused.
"Aren't you gonna come?" She asks, so sweetly in comparison to the heat you're taking from her brother. Trey smiles at you, but he can't really bring himself to keep eye contact.
"The prefect's busy, I'm sure. They don't need to be running around after us all day." He sets them both down and starts herding them towards the mirror, shooting you a wink over his shoulder as he flicks his little brother on the forehead for sticking his tongue out at you. His sister sighs and you swear you hear her whine that-
"You just want to keep them to yourself. You can't keep me away forever, I swear I'll be a good wing woman, you're waaaay too lame to get a date yourself Trey!" You awkwardly look back down at your clipboard as Grim desperately tries to do the math in his head.
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