#really needed to vent this one out

[bbnibini]

I find it so painfully heartbreaking that Solomon just...laughs off all the derision, the name-calling, and possibly even did "evil" things on purpose because it's expected of him at this point. (He had not always been like this as Thirteen pointed out before). There was a time when he was "innocent". When his soul sparkled. When it resembled the kind of soul everyone in these god forsaken (pun intended with spite) three realms seemed to associate with the ever loved MC. He's just...worryingly carefree. And because he's like that, he feels even more of a tragic character to me.

Sometimes it even seems that he himself would seemingly make up excuses on why he's hated. Oh, it's because I'm a sorcerer this. I might have won a war against Devildom single-handedly this. I have forgotten. But maybe, I did something bad, that. Hon, you were doing that to SURVIVE. You don't have to be a faultless person to deserve compassion. You don't have to be MC to deserve to be loved.

#rant #the more i play and read about nb solomon the more it feels like he's a worst case scenario foil to MC #and it's ridiculous maybe to feel this way but seeing how everyone dotes on mc and just panders to them without question no matter #especially with meaner dialogues #make me dislike the mc to some extent #what good will raising up one character do in exchange of dehumanising another? #i couldn't put a finger on this feeling before #but i think that's also why im so burnt out with this game #the more everyone loves me as the mc the more it becomes so apparent how unfairly solomon was treated #and how everyone ESPECIALLY HIM just rolls with it #sweetie please be angry. please complain. please hate me in some way #but no he just keeps loving and supporting the mc #in game in fandom this man can't catch a break #wanna gatekeep him fr /s #this has just been brewing in my mind for a while. i don't really wanna hear discourse or arguments that's why i put it in the tags #I just need a place to vent my frustrations with this game #obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me solomon #spoiler mention #he's imperfect and flawed as all humans are and he deserves to be loved irregardless

[cemeterything]

the more i learn about the mortuary profession the more i'm convinced everyone else is weird about people who work with the dead and i'm the normal one. of course i understand why people find corpses and the decay process and the end of life in general upsetting, because being reminded that you and everyone you know will eventually cease to exist and there's nothing you can do about it isn't something you can really take any comfort in, but it's just death? it's just inevitable and the way things are? people who work with the dead aren't creepy horror movie mad scientists cooking up frankensteins and draculas, and they're not immoral sickos even if they do have a fascination with the grotesque and macabre. they're just people providing an important service. a lot of them are very compassionate, passionate, hardworking people who want the best for the memory of the deceased and their loved ones. i genuinely don't understand what's so bad and scary about that, but whenever i bring it up there's always at least a few people who look at me like i'm crazy and call me a creep and make a show of shuddering and backhandedly complimenting my "bravery" and "unique career goals" while laughing as if my genuine interest in death and the dead is all just some inappropriate joke. i swear it's more unsettling how many people are unwilling to even acknowledge death as a natural inevitable part of life than it is to talk about it.

#🐉 #and like. i always get people telling me i need to read more books about it/talk to people/spend one day with a dying person #and ill change my mind. but ive done all those things and i just want to work in the mortuary field even more now? #instructions unclear i am now convinced this is the job for me. oops! #this is really just me thinking out loud/venting but like #i never really noticed just how many people are like. uncomfortable with even talking about death as a concept #until i became interested in mortuary sciences #death

[emberglowfox]

closing time

#you know situation's dire when sparks breaks out the color block sona vent art LOOOOOOOL #sparks speaks #vent #again to all my new-ish followers i do post stuff like this from time 2 time PLEASE block one of those tags if you don't want to see it #long post #edit: fine to rb idgas #ummm NEway. i go back to college in like a month and the thought of it makes me want to curl up and die. idk if i can do it again tbh lol #i dont know how i survived the first time #<- LYING he does. and it was by letting the dissociation he is currently bitching about swallow him completely #if i really committed and tried i could probably claw my way out of this. but there's really no point when i'll just fall back into it soon #the forgetting my entire life does suck though. it does suck. #its really cool learning you've lost the only thing you thought you couldn't lose. #anyways. i'm fine im chillin i just. needed to get this out #if youre reading this preciate you. drink water

[puppyeared]

its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously

#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to #im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but #because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of #exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something #and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh #and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing #because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant #even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still #its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn…. #if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about #I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird #maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel #a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t #I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to #be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol #idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week #had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting #yapping #does this count as vent #vent #Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly

[zebratimw]

Spirit animal SQH

#svsss #shang qinghua #but mainly I'm just here to vague post LMAO I don't like to vague post its not very effective in terms of venting but #but basically I guess I'm becoming hyperaware of my like... cognitive dissonance codependency and derealization ee #also my general laziness ig and where it overlaps into executive dysfunction or whatever like I may genuinely have some issues but #I am also a lazy son of a bitch jfjfkgkg and i need to figure out how to figure it out so I can work on both in more effective ways hhggg #oh yeah but basically the thing to remember for later is the silence in the call and the immediate unmute and chat activity once I left #I should remember this and stop interacting I think? I should try to give em space I think I'm being too clingy or something #or maybe my own silence is too awkward and dampens the call? I was kinda just spacing out and not doing anything so I get its kinda weird #LMAO so I should just like try not to be in call for those times mm #I just like being in call with my friends jdhfkg but I suppose its not very good either #I overindulge I suppose another friend pointed it out to me before too haha but fjfjjt its just easier than facing bouts of dread by myself #eehh and that's why I gotta do something about my Metnal Ailneses hfjfj but ngl I don't really know how to go about it... #I get embarrassed looking stuff up djfnfkg and half the time I don't even know what to look up I just draw ?s and I give up #I suppose I also have commitment issues too but that ones not new which is an issue of itself aaaaaaaa #man idk idk I just don't really get it I guess djdjfjf and I've got existential dreads and think maybe it doesn't really matter whats wrong #cause there's no point to fixing them because ultimately I'm gonna die alone and a failure anyways? so like ehfjgkg idk #its depressing and I know its like sabotage cause my brain is being a little silly a little goofy and its not a shared sentiment #with the better half of me and the entirety of my friends but yknow its just ee harder sometimes to believe in the optimism ig #and i can talk about it somewhat normally and without like having a ✨️break down #but yknow djfjgkg I'm very emotional a person ya? I think sqh is relatable for gods sake 💀 #irrationality sentimentality nihilism and existential dreads... wanting to die because living is too hard despite all my hopes for living... #just the ol regulars yknow? #and another thing... do I talk to my friends about these things? I vent them out here a lot but what do I really want? #I'm not strong enough to keep it to myself clearly but I'm also too proud to share these thoughts? I dump them out in the open and for what? #whenever someone reaches out with concern and care I don't respond in kind and refuse to elaborate? #so like what do I want with this? I guess I want someone to know I'm going insane half the time I'm awake? but not do anything about it? #that's pretty unfair I guess... and stupid I think I do want to share my thoughts with someone but I'm too scared of the ramifications #and that my pride can't stand the fact I might be looked differently by my friends even tho the image they have of me is already quite silly #man.... idk.... I'll come to conclusions myself and do nothing about them so I guess that'll happen again aah idk idk idk

[b4kuch1n]

genre of chillin

#pokemon #swsh #champion leon #professor sonia #gym leader raihan #three parts of a whole idiot #hi. hello. I have Things I now both need and really really want to do #but! I also need to unclench! so #my thing really is that every time I feel yikes I draw a buncha guys mushed up into a pile. and that cures it #and then I call my friends to see who wants to see a fish get chopped up in a vent system with me #making good on my hc that sonia talks leon into fixing up her clothes once in a while #(theyre like. 30-ish in this one. I still think abt it a lot. the actual nitty gritty of ''happy ever after'') #the world moves on! but animals are still animals. and if the time's good ur friends are still ur friends #okay. I maaaayy have news for u guys soon. but for that to turn out I need to do what I really want to do anyway. #here's to an excellent time! have a good night lads!! check ur vitamin C requirement!

[bibannana]

Rex *staring at Fives*: You have got to be joking.

Fives *stuck halfway out of an air vent*: Oh right let me just- *wriggles trying to get out before flopping*

Echo *gasping for breath from laughing so hard*

#no Rex he really is stuck #somebofy has been stealing one to many cookies #echo thinks this is hilarious #poor sucker is really wedged in there #this was meant to be a covert op #but when you need to break a vent to get him out i don't think it's so covert anymore #arc trooper fives #captain rex #star wars #incorrect star wars quotes #the clone wars #tcw #clone wars #incorrect clone wars quotes #501st #fives #501st shenanigans #rex #arc trooper echo #echo

[maudiemoods]

Ok not cool why am I hearing voices

#i need to go to the doctor 🧍🏼‍♂️ #somethings wrong because usually they're not this clear #its weird and i dont like it #they sound like people i know and its too much right now #little vent sorry but i think im actually struggling #im so confused #aurhhg #ren won't shut up #mental illness #idk sometimes they get really clear and it freaks me out #other times it sounds like a bunch of voices talking over each other and it drives me crazy #most of the time when they're clear they just have very boring conversations #wow i didn't realize how much this was affecting me huh #most of the time its right as im trying to fall asleep. i can't tell if its just my dreams?? idk #but sometimes ill hear very loud words that are super clear #aa its scary sometimes grrr but normally it doesn't mess me up #but i heard a loved one say “help me” and now im freaking out aaaaurgggg #gonna text them because i also have paranoia really bad #tw mental illness #idk just in case i guess #im fine just a little spooked jdkxjsjxj #anyways sorry for the vent/ramble i just really needed to type it all out #might delete later idk

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

does anyone else have this issue where you belong to a group, you know you do, but whenever other people of that group talk about shared experiences across that group, you suddenly have the horrible and unmistakeable feeling that you are some kind of fraud? that you hear things that should promote camaraderie, but actually leave feeling less assured of your place when everyone else looks bolstered? that you need to be alone a long while to remember you belong, and feel confident enough to rejoin the group, only to sit there feeling like a hollow wax figurine, shifted and placed to sit just slightly out of line, just a little too close to the fire?

#hey maybe we’ll just pretend this is an edgy passage from a new story I’m writing. That sounds good. Damn what an edgelord am I right? Lol #vent #I’ll delete this dw. I just have no one to talk to right now. and I need it out so I can move on. #please don’t feel compelled to respond or anything. I really am just screaming into the void rn

[pansyfemme]

im having anxiety so bad right now that im overwhelmed by noise but quiet is making me so paranoid i cant not have my headphones in

#ive been venting on tumblr since day one of this account but this feels different now #i dont know where to go sometimes i dont want to wake up friends or therapists or parents or even really talk one on one #i just want to speak and people to read it i guess #but ive become really obsessive about being a bad person and its ruining my life lately #there was an incident at home that made me go back into this old thought process i have #and the roomate struggles have made it worse #i feel needy and constantly needing attention and validation and it makes me sick #i want to tell people i love them constantly because i need to but then i convince myself thats also bad that must be manipulation #everytime i dislike someone they must know it and hate me and find me disgusting #im like so tired of obsessions #of not being able to hear words i cant make out without becoming obsessive about how people must be talking about me #and i hate the aftershocks of shame of assuming im even important enough to be talked about #vent tw

[fagbearentertainment]

As I was getting in the shower I looked in the mirror at myself and started thinking about how in an ideal world where I knew my parent would accept me, where my state hadn’t made it literally illegal to transition at my age, and where I wasn’t scared to be visibly trans I would be ~5 months on hrt and using my chosen name and pronouns irl and now I feel wrong

#like I wanna scream and cry and be mad but I can’t #bc no one in my life knows and I’m so scared to tell them #and it hurts and I hate it so much but I literally can’t do anything #wish my wrist wasn’t hurt bc I really need to get this out through art #bc writing it out isn’t enough #I might try anyway #vent #vent tw #lgbtqia #transgender

[nicmares404]

Bruh, this is the third time i've been sick in the last 2 months. Viruses have to actually be targeting me at this point, cause this is just ridiculous (⊙_◎)

Like yeah I have a weaker immune system, but I'm literally not even going anywhere! I guess whatever traces my sister brings home from school (she's in HS) is enough. To make matters worse, my toddler brother is about to start pre-school. I sense so many more illnesses in my future O|￣|_

#i'm really excited he's starting school though #he's practically my kid so that adds to it #i guess this is kind of a vent? rant? idk #i'm just really irritated #especially since everyone else is usually fine #or if they do get sick they are better within a day or two #and i'm out for like a week #and also to find out that i can't even take dayquil/nyquil anymore without severe pain (i have been taking it my whole life) #yeah this is a rant #feel free to ignore #i just need to complain a bit😅 #i'm also gonna take a covid test cause this sore throat is worse than normal #i've only had 4 things that made it this bad and covid is one of them #cheese says stuff #rant

[nmoroder]

You know i used to have these surges of art coming through my hands at night. They're back, these surges. And i love Klogg can you tell

1st pic almost quotes Bible cuz you know, TenNapel himself said the Neverhood story is biblical in nature so yeah it comes naturally

2nd is Hoborg's humanized design through years (he hasn't really changed between '21 and today)

3d pic says "there are things i will never forgive myself for" and it echoes the headcanon that Hoborg had great guilt for what Klogg had become bcuz of the crown and was actually terrified of seeing and touching him

4th pic is abt this story i composed a couple of years ago, in short it's the segment where Klaymen and Klogg had to fight Some Guys and Klay obtained a blaster a while ago. yeah and Klogg had a blast using a spear which promptly broke after a dozen of hits

6th pic references the latest askblog post (and psst is the short summary of where they're gonna be heading next)

#neverhood #humanization #moroderdraws #klogg #hoborg #klaymen #one of the things im really happy about is kloggs human design. i mean #back in 2012 when i created it he was already perfect #i only had to change a couple of things to suit my current style and thats it #truly means something haha #im glad he stayed with me thru these years. neverhood truly is the source of my autism power #not srs im not diagnosed with autism. its just that undying thing inside your soul that keeps supporting you #and it often happens that thinking and making art abt neverhood brings me out of a hole i myself dug and fell into #like it did now. i was in a major crisis for the last 3 months or so #and im coming back to art. back to frequent drawing because god knows i needed it #i feel alive. thank you fandoms for being there. #aight sorry for a vent dump im just being emotional over things ive loved for over a decade haha #hope yall feeling good atm!

[bitegore]

can you leave me the fuck alone tumblr

#red rambles #ive never used these tags in my life and furthermore i dont think any of us really need to be seeing that unexpectedly #im not an enemy of the ed community on here. they had good advice when i was trying really hard to figure out how to stay fed in hs #but there's a lot of reasons that no one - in or out - should be seeing these unexpectedly when typing two common ass letters #(the phrase i was typing was 'i was') #uhhhhhhhh. ask to tag? #HUH. yeah for some reason they keep giving me a shitload of ed tags in my 'popular' or whatever thing #i type the letter u and the third from the top is 'ed vent' WHERES THE U TUMBLR #like. whats going on here man.

[demodraws0606]

Warning : Salty Rant below

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This is gonna be slightly irrational but this weekend has been very shit and I need to rant right now.

The amount of salt I have for the horrendous q!BBH takes that have come ever since his team has been betrayed is enormous right now.

Lord help me to conjure all the self control I have not to yell at people that maybe they should listen to cc!BBH when he says that "he would kill the ENTIRE SERVER if it means getting the eggs back".

I was so happy to see cc!BBH gaining another reason to make his character spiteful against the other islanders but now I can't stumble into Tumblr without people making q!BBH out to be this pillar of morality again.

Like I'm sorry that I think q!BBH indiscriminatly terrorising people like q!Slime and killing them is like worse morally than killing a Stone Egg that we have no evidence to believe is actually connected to the real eggs (even more so that in some people's case they think they would've been forced to do it anyways).

It was shit that they betrayed their words and I do like how it kinda flipped the q!BBH's dynamic with the entire server on it's head making him look like the only rational one.

Even then GGN didn't even think they were betraying the deal since they were going by the logic that if they didn't kill the egg it was fine (at least q!Etoiles did)

However now I'm stuck again with the fandom treating BBH's characters like poor little victims who did nothing wrong which is a thing that I hated ever since the DSMP. Except now there is even less justification for it because the cc! straight up told us in our face that his character isn't moral by any means.

#qsmp #vent #discourse #qsmp fandom neg #q!bbh #q!badboyhalo #bbh #badboyhalo #i don't really want people to try to argue with me on this one i just need to like #vent out frustrations because in general this weekend has been frustrating #this small thing just pushed me over the edge though #apologies for the negativity #i'm just so drained

[imrisah]

-

#Life update that no one asked for but I feel like i haven't been present for so long #chronic pain right? i kind of have it #it's jaw related apparently seems like I have lockjaw out whatever and it's uneven and a side of it has to work a lot harder #to close my mouth so my muscles on the right side of my body are just having none of it #a mouth guard had helped reduce the frequency of episodes but it will take a long time for them to go away #if they do #I'm down to one serious full blown episode a month and a lot of smaller negligible instances of pain #a lot of stuff in my chest seizes up in the middle of my sleep cause i clench my jaw really hard apparently #clenching also potentially the cause of my light and poor quality sleep #it's getting better slowly 💪 #i Just needed to vent my hopes and fears to the ether i guess #no art unfortunately just d&d in my life right now #i did do maps but I'm jealous of them