Red: Like, the shouts are just dragon language, making the fights between dragons basically an argument. But now this puny human has a minimal grasp of the vocab
Red: Imagine you're disagreeing with your bud about something unimportant like pineapple on pizza, and then a mouse came running over and called you a bitch
also, I'm contemplating how I draw sans rn since I've looked at @/ scrambledmeggys blog ?!?!?! IT'S JUST SO GOOD?!?! I don't know what fits with my MAIN drawing style since the skeleboys just look so out of place. OH WELL!! I'll figure it out soon!!
Remember THIS? This adorable freakin’ grafghgafrafgrah?
Well @halloweensuittruffles asked me to write some headcanons for how Red and the Player would live a domestic farm life! (I added the sdv bit for funzies because I love this game) So here you go!
(Apologies to those that know nothing about Stardew Valley)
❤️Red BHC SDV Domestic Life Headcanons❤️
- He’s the type to sleep in until you actively drag him out of bed, and even then he might need a friendly kick. Every other day he tends to complain about your 6am chores and telling you it’s an “Un-Yoba-ly time to do anything”. He has a point.
- A miner at heart that’ll only do farming chores if you ask nicely. But he does bring a whole lot of resources and shiny minerals home, so who can blame him? Not to mention how loaded he is with iridium.
- Also the type to steal all the food in the fridge for his mining trips.
- He named one of the bunnies “Big Chungus” and always giggles whenever he collects rabbit’s feet or wool from the coops.
- Will “accidentally” break several of the fences on the farm on separate occasions and not tell you.
- Hid a slime incubator in the house and won’t tell you where it is and why slimes keep waking you up.
- He secretly has a puppy/baby voice whenever he’s being affectionate with the void chickens and will deny it if you ask him about it.
- Somehow finds obscenely rare items easily.
- Although he’s as good with a fishing rod as he is with a garden hoe. (He isn’t.)
- He gave you a simple kiss, a thank you, and a few special gifts when you made him a personalised biker jacket. You found him bawling over it later.
- He also shows off how cool you are to the other townsfolk whenever you go into town.
- Says that you made the greenhouse looked “too fluffy” when you decorated it. But you’re not the one that set up the fairy roses. To be fair, he did somehow get them to look like a badass black colour.
- Before the animals all go to sleep he plays a song for them on his guitar.
- He trades baking recipes with Evelyn.
- He filled an entire deluxe coop with dinosaurs.
- Is the type to come home sluggish or just straight up pass out on mining days. Harvey is deeply concerned about his health. And also deeply confused how he has health.
- Said Shane had a “skill issue”. Immediately regretted it when he saw his heart events.
Stretch: You're a lying piece of shit!
Red: Oh yeah? You're the idiot that thinks you can get away with everything you do, WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!
Blue: I'm leaving and I'm taking Rus with me!
Sans, gathering cards: Aaaaand that's enough Monopoly for today.