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#reesker
punksarahreese · 11 months
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“You don’t get to call me that.” for estrangement omggg
Heat of the Moment
Estrangement | Exes!AU
Ship: Reesker
CW: accusations of abuse
WC: 1076
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They had been yelling for a while, to the point where Sarah expected someone from PD to come banging on the door about a noise complaint. Ava had backed herself into the wall beside her fishtank, mirroring Sarah’s closed off body language that urged her to stay back. Startled eyes tracked her every movement, noting every shift and step the other woman took.
She wasn’t sure how this argument started, just like everyone before it. Sarah had let herself in with a huff, tossing her keys onto the coffee table and not bothering to pick them up when they slipped onto the pristine grey carpet. That’s where her eyes stayed frozen as she looked for words, searching for a way to convey what she wanted.
“You keep me isolated,” Ava’s whisper was barely audible, “When was the last time I went out with friends? The last time I met up with you and your friends? I don’t have anyone but you in Chicago, Sarah, and part of me wonders if you wanted to keep it that way!”
“Don’t you dare say that,” Sarah spat, “Your inability to make friends is not my fault at all.”
“Right, so the way no one ever thinks to acknowledge me when they invite you out right in front of me, that’s all coincidence?’
Sarah scoffed, “Well I think your totally approachable personality could be to blame, Ava.”
“I have a personality disorder, Sarah!” Ava’s tone matched hers as she uncrossed her arms, visibly shaking. She was looking at her girlfriend in disbelief, wondering where on earth the understanding, loving woman she knew went in all of this.
“That doesn’t excuse anything.”
“I never said it did. It’s an explanation, Sarah, not an excuse. You know how hard I have worked to be better socially, you know I’m trying. You of all people would know…”
Sarah ignored the way she blinked rapidly, if she did she might lose her courage. If she acknowledged the hurt in her girlfriend’s watery eyes, she might drop the subject and then the cycle would begin anew. Love and care turning to small conflicts and then even bigger meltdowns. It wouldn’t change, it wouldn’t stop; not unless Sarah fought back.
“They’ve noticed.”
“What?”
Sarah never once met her gaze, “At the hospital, they talk. They talk about how you act and how unfeeling you are. They wonder if you care about anyone but yourself. Your fights with Connor, your involvement with his dad. People have been talking for months.”
“I never did anything with Cornelius-”
“I’m not finished,” she said firmly, “They’ve talked to me, Ava. They ask if everything is okay at home. We say we’re dating but they never see us outside of work, not together. Some of the nurses ask if I’m okay, if there’s something wrong in our relationship.”
“I didn’t think anything was wrong… We just don’t do PDA, we aren’t those people. Sarah you know I never did anything with Connor’s dad and my relationship with Connor was a mutual issue. I’m not unfeeling, you know better than anyone that I feel too much. It’s why I have to depersonalize at work, otherwise I will break down.”
“Ava, I have been researching,” Sarah sighed, “Cluster B disorders… I think you were misdiagnosed.”
“Sarah Reese, I know what you’re thinking. Don’t you dare say it.”
Unruly curls bounced as she shook her head rapidly, mind racing too much to listen for the hurt in Ava’s voice. She had poured over countless journals and information for months, asking every psychiatrist she knew for information. Her notebook was littered with notes, messy beyond legibility for anyone else, all citing experiences she had recalled. Sarah had even reached out to her mom, something she never did anymore, asking for stories about her dad. She recited every observed behaviour and memory she had about the two of them, Ava and her dad, long enough that a connection bloomed in her mind.
“Your behaviour is concerning,” she started, “I can’t ignore it anymore, Ava. I wonder if you feel anything, really, because it doesn’t seem like it sometimes. I don’t want to believe you’re lying to me but that's all I can think now. Is all of it made up, do you really love me?”
“Sarah, I care about you so-”
Can you really love me? I think I have a habit of finding people who remind me of the man I grew up without… I begin to wonder if the pattern has any substance. The way you act, some of the things you’ve said, it doesn’t add up. I don’t think you’re borderline, Ava, I think you have ASPD.”
“Sarah,” tears had started tracking down Ava’s cheeks as the pain bubbled in her chest, “Don’t say that. You can’t diagnose me. I have trauma, I have all the markers of BPD and OCD. I was diagnosed after the last incident in my twenties, you know that; you read my notes. What are you even saying?”
“I’m saying people are asking if you abuse me emotionally,” Sarah’s voice was unlike she had ever heard before, cold and ripping at her heart like daggers, “My mind keeps comparing you to my dad and it all makes sense now. I’m saying I am starting to believe what they said may be true. I think maybe I flock to abusers with pretty words and lies-”
“No!” Ava’s scream rang through her apartment, punctuated by a thud as she backed into the wall again. Tears were freefalling down her face and leaving clumps of mascara behind, highlighting the agony she felt as she was staring at the woman she loved. Her hands shook violently as she tried to channel everything she felt into a feasible emotion, feeling like everything would bubble up until it exploded.
“You- you don’t get to call me that! After everything… How fucking dare you, Sarah? A-after I tried so hard, for years, to not become like the people who hurt me. You can call me a lot of things but psychopath? Abuser? I would never hurt you, and certainly not like this.”
“Ava, the research shows-”
“Out!” she screeched and scrambled to grab Sarah’s keys off the carpet, tossing them towards the door to make distance between them. She backed up again, arms crossed tightly around her body, “Get out, Sarah.”
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kitweewoos · 6 months
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I wanna try something new, so.... you know.... vote, reblog, word of mouth, whatever, help me!
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pushupcontest · 1 year
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Sarah: Dr. Charles, I think I’m a psychopath.
Daniel: What, why? You are one of the most empathetic people I know.
Sarah: Every time I see Dr. Rhodes and Dr. Bekker, I feel really angry and I want to strangle them. They didn't do anything to me, I don't know why I feel like this.
Daniel: Sarah, that’s normal, you're just jealous.
Sarah: What do you mean? Why would I be jealous of him?
Daniel: No, I think you're jealous of Dr. Bekker. From what I’ve seen, you seem to have some sort of romantic feelings for Dr. Rhodes.
Sarah: No… that’s not it. I can’t see us together romantically.
Daniel: *takes out notepad and starts writing* Describe how you feel when you see them.
Sarah: Well, when I see them together, I feel really angry and like I want to strangle them. When I see Dr. Rhodes alone, I still feel angry but it’s less intense. And… you know, it’s weird, when I see Dr. Bekker alone, I don’t feel angry at all. 
Daniel: Ok, we will brainstorm some reasons as to why you feel this way. Number one, you’re in love with Connor. Number two, you want to be friends with Ava. Number three, you want to be friends with Connor. Number four, you’re jealous of their surgical accomplishments. Number five, you are jealous of Connor’s wealth.
Sarah: No, I don’t know… none of those sound right.
Sharon: *closes her laptop in the background* Daniel, you are so stupid. The girl is clearly in love with Dr. Bekker.
Sarah: Oh my god.. You are right. What do I do?
Sharon: *shakes her head* How are these my two psychiatrists?
Ava: *enters* Dr. Charles, I think I'm a psychopath!
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solesommerso · 7 months
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whumptober 2023 day 3 : vows
Chicago med, Sarah/Ava other characters: Kevin (cpd), other doctors from med
warnings : forced marriage, kidnapping, chains/restraints, unwilling drugging, mentioned torture
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Sarah takes in a breath as she smoothes over her white dress, the material is thin and soft under her hands, it feels all too revealing. There’s a crowd of people awaiting her to walk down the aisle, a man she doesn’t know at her side, a sympathetic smile on his face as though he’s apologizing for what’s about to happen.
“You look stunning.” A grin gets sent Sarah’s way once she approaches her awaiting partner, anxiety sitting painfully in her stomach as she takes Ava in. Her dress is much more modest than Sarah’s is, gold jewelry laid over her neck to match the clip she has holding her short hair back, her makeup is light and shines under the overhead lights. She looks like any normal bride, happy and excited about her marriage, not like she drugged Sarah to get her here and like the chains still clanking at her ankles weren’t put there by Ava herself.
“Do you two have vows prepared?” Connor meets Sarah’s eyes with his own fearful look, she can’t see but she assumes he has chains around his ankles the same way Sarah does. The same way they all do: April, Natalie, Noah, Ethan, Will, even Maggie. They still look more drugged than Sarah herself is, she’s been here the longest, at the apartment complex that Ava bought but uses as her personal prison for her past coworkers.
“Sarah, the light of my life, you were perfect the minute I laid my eyes on you. You were everything I ever wanted, I knew I had to have you.” Her hands get taken into Ava’s, it makes her body shiver but she musters the best smile she can. Fighting only leads to punishment and Sarah can’t sit through another day of being strapped to the medical table in that cold room she could throw up thinking about.
“What the hells going on?!” Will yells and cuts through the quietness of the room, it startles the others more awake, the redhead pulling at the ties that hold his hands behind the chair he’s sat in.
Sarah hates to see him struggle, she wants to tell him it’s okay, that if he goes along they’ll make it out okay, but the man who walked Sarah down the aisle is moving towards Will before she can. His hands are on Halstead’s shoulders, holding him down with a grunt about staying quiet during the ceremony. Reese isn’t sure how Ava knows him, how he became apart of this, but she doesn’t think it’s by his own free will.
“No more interruptions! Today is a special day, a day for me and Sarah.” Ava shouts the first words but drops her tone to something softer. It’d almost sound sweet if Sarah didn’t know how her mood changes within seconds and how she might be plunging a knife into Reese’s skin if she’s not careful.
“Ava, what are you doing? Can’t we talk about this?” Natalie pips up with her voice shaking but that signature Natalie type of care showing through, she’s always been so hopeful.
“There’s nothing to talk about, me and Sarah love each other, we’re getting married.” One of Ava’s hands moves to brush against Sarah’s skin, Reese almost starts to cry. She feels so empty staring back into someone she once considered a close friend who know seems like a complete stranger.
“Sweetheart…” The dark haired girl trails off, looking helplessly at Sarah before turning her head towards where Will is still being whisper-yelled at by the man Sarah’s yet to hear name for.
“Will it’s okay, it’s alright.” Reese calls out as assuringly as she can, watching him continue to struggle is making her chest ache, and she knows Ava won’t tolerate it much longer.
“Kevin’s a cop, he’s going to have his unit looking for him. The people at the hospital are going to look for us.” Halstead ignores Sarah’s pleads to instead start shouting at Ava, an almost frantic tone in his voice.
“Nobody will be looking for Kevin since he quit his job, and so did you all, such a shame Goodwin wouldn’t pay you better wages. Nobody will notice you’re gone.” Even if Sarah has heard it all before, it still makes her stomach churn.
“And don’t worry Natalie, sweet little Owen is staying with his grandmother while you take some time to clear your head.” That eases Sarah as much as it does Manning, she hadn’t heard Ava mention Owen till now but it had been a constant question in the back of her mind.
“Now let’s get back to the wedding. It’s your turn to say your vows baby.” Ava’s lips curl into a smile, hands gripping Sarah’s, it takes all of Reese’s willpower to not start to sob the tears she’s been holding back since she got taken, instead she steels herself with a breath and thinks up the most romantic vows she can. The more she goes along the better it’ll be, the more of a chance they’ll have to get out of here.
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flyingpotstickers · 10 months
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“Leave her be! Princess or not, learning to fight is essential.” for princess au
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+ @speeeenc also prompted the word 'safety' : (p.s. I picture the kids to be about 14-16 in this scene.)
THEY'RE BAAAAACK! FINALLY! I MISSED THIS SERIES!!!
Sarah blinks back surprise when she hears her betrothed's words of outrage--- Sarah was learning how to fight, being taught by Ava's brother, Connor, himself. She was safest with Avey of course, but Connor would do for a swift second.
"Leave her be!" Connor snickered, "Learning to fight is essential, even for princesses like you," he shot a quick look at his own betrothed, Will. "Don't you think so William?" he asked tauntingly.
Will, who hated his full name, shoved his groom to be. "Yeah, Ava. Don't you want Sarah here to be able to defend herself when you get grouchy and above your station?"
"HEY! I am your king!" Connor shouted indignantly.
"My love, I should hate to see your face when your crown won't fit because your ego's too big!" Will crowed out, laughing.
Sarah was pulled to the one side by Ava.
"Let me teach you how to fight, Princess. I will do you justice." Ava said earnestly, nudging her foot.
"Okay." Sarah smiled brightly.
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space-rave12 · 7 months
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My first fic!
The year is 20XX. In the small party town of San Augusta, the shy Sarah Reese and the outgoing party girl Ava Bekker meet and create a bond that seems to defy the odds.
This is my first fic in a while! I've had this on my mind for a while so please enjoy!
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crockettmarcel · 1 year
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"On the count of three, okay?" + reesker if you like for tsf <3
"I'm not jumping in that water, absolutely not," Ava says, wrapping her arms around her shaking body. "They aren't paying me to jump in a lake. And what if there are brain-eating amoebas in there? I don't want anything eating my brain."
Sarah smiles and takes her hand, then leads her slowly towards the end of the dock.
"It's not that cold, and I promise there are no amoebas of any kind in there. On the count of three, okay?"
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purple-dahlias · 1 year
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chalk cove!au
“I’m so tired of this,” Sarah huffs out, and she looks it, Ava observes, her head barely supported in her hands, dark curls spilling around her face and down her shoulders in a tangled mess. Two day old mascara forms a rim under her eyes.
“When does it get easier?” Her voice cracks, just a whisper above the sound of the waves crashing onto the rocks below, but the desperation is audible.
“Soon,” Ava hums softly, reaching along the railing and placing a well-manicured hand over Sarah’s icy one. “You’ve come so far already,” she reminds her.
“And if it’s not enough, if, if I can’t do it by myself…” Sarah trails off, staring out at the ocean, trying to find the divide between the ocean and the sky.
“You don’t have to, love,” Ava knits her brows together, knowing what Sarah is driving at, what she is worried about happening. What happened last time. “I’m here. And we’ll stay here as long as is needed. We’re going to do this together. I’m going to get us through this.”
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elenarodriiguez · 2 years
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missing
it has been three hundred and ninety seven days, thirteen hours and fifteen minutes since sarah reese was last seen. by investigators’ standards, her disappearance is a cold case.
but not for ava. sarah had been the only person to make moving almost eight thousand miles from everything and everyone she’d ever known.
their friendship had been the only thing keeping her afloat in those first few awful months, and her kisses had been the only thing that had felt like home to ava on this side of the atlantic.
she knew that sarah wouldn’t have just left her alone without any warning, and she definitely wouldn’t have gone willingly with robert.
if only the waste of space cops would believe her when she told them that, repeatedly.
now it has been three hundred and ninety seven days, thirteen hours and sixteen minutes since sarah reese was last seen.
and then ava’s phone rings, an unknown number with a chicago area code. one maggie lockwood at gaffney chicago medical centre informing ava that a jane doe had been repeating her name and number ever since she’d been found.
three hundred and ninety seven days, thirteen hours and sixteen minutes without sarah reese, and ava was certain they wouldn’t spend a day apart ever again.
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emily-prentits · 1 year
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if names count for wip guessing game: ava
ofc!!! i dug out my reesker flower shop au for u :))
Sarah eyes the emblem embroidered onto Ava’s jacket, for some reason it's surrounded with colorful flowers, but oddly enough, the colors work well.
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redhairedwolfwitch · 2 years
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13. Candle - Sarah Reese + Ava Bekker + Reader - Chicago Med - Summer Camp!AU
@purple-dahlias' Seven sentence fic July day 13: candle
The candles flickered as a light breeze blew through the darkness of the room.
"Because that's not creepy at all, there's not even a window open." You commented, glancing around at the windows as Sarah chewed her lip, meeting Ava's smirk.
"Getting scared?" Ava teased, but you rolled your eyes, looking at Sarah for a moment before your gaze lingered back on the spirit board that Ava had brought to camp this summer.
"No! Just..." You glanced at the windows again, about to get up and check the curtains were closed when a hand rested on your knee.
"Do we have any more lights? Maybe something less of a fire hazard?" Sarah enquired, looking towards Ava, who let out a huff, but nodded.
"I was saving this for the ghost stories later, but fine," putting out the unnecessarily large flashlight to turn on under her chin, illuminating her face creepily.
"Now, let's start off with something simple. Are there any spirits with us tonight?" Ava asked, gesturing for the three of you to place fingers on the planchette to see if the three of you would get an answer.
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punksarahreese · 1 year
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“I’m sick of hearing that I’ll be fine” for chronic or recurrence pls? 💖
Fine line | Chronic
Spoonie!Sarah
***
Ava heard the laptop slam shut on itself from the bedroom, knowing that wasn’t a very good sign. She quickly ran the brush through her hair once more before leaving her perch on the bedside, following the frustrated muttering from down the hall.
Her girlfriend was pacing in the kitchen, the offending computer abandoned on the table. Her face portrayed more sadness than anger, despite the words she was spitting into the empty air at no one in particular.
“Hey,” Ava spoke before she approached, “Was the appointment-”
“Never turn to telemedicine, Ava,” Sarah interrupted her sharply, “Useless excuse for a cardiologist hides behind his computer. Didn’t even have the courtesy to turn his camera on before he told me my labs were normal.”
“Video appointments never do anyone justice,” Ava agreed slowly, “Did he say anything else?”
“Sinus tachycardia aggravated by the medication change,” she stopped her pacing to look at her girlfriend for the first time, “Stay on 5 mg and see him again in two months.”
“Seriously?”
“Yep,” the popped ‘p’ was incredulous, “Never mind the fact that I was in the ED with a heart rate of 150 after an eight hour shift with no improvement.”
The blonde had drifted over to Sarah, cautiously reaching out for her arm. She had seen the unsteady swaying that had taken over her girlfriend’s motions, whether or not she noticed in the midst of her emotions. The last thing they needed was for Sarah to pass out, lest she give herself another concussion on the way down.
“I know you’re upset, love, but can we sit down?” She tried to be gentle yet avoided coddling, knowing that’s not what she needed in that moment. Sarah met her concerned gaze and hesitated, yet she let her girlfriend guide her over to the chair she had left pushed out from the table.
“I’m sorry you aren’t getting the help you need, Sarah,” she pushed a rouge curl back behind her ear, “It’s not your fault.”
“I’m sick of hearing that I’ll be fine.”
“I know.”
The anger had dissipated but only to be replaced by frustrated tears, making tracks down Sarah’s flushed cheeks. The redness was from her exerting herself in her pacing, her body’s autonomic system unable to keep up, but the frustration only worsened it. Ava saw it in the way her hands shook and her chest heaved a little as she couldn’t stop the sob that escaped her.
“Oh,” Ava dragged her chair closer and grabbed for Sarah’s hand to help cease the tremor, “Sarah, I know you’re not fine. I know you’re hurting and I promise I believe you. We can find another doctor, I’ll contact as many cardiologists as I know and then some.”
“I’m just… I hate feeling so,” she shook her head, “Why is it so hard to get them to listen to me?”
“I don’t know, darling. It’s not fair.”
“I’m educated, I know what I’m talking about and I know my body,” Sarah swiped at a tear before it could traverse her jaw, “I’m not just a patient.”
“And you’re 100% correct,” Ava agreed, “Your ideas were good. We’ll find someone who will listen and help you make a proper treatment plan, okay?”
“I’m so sick of monitors and pushing myself so far for no improvement. An implanted monitor would be so much easier for everyone involved…”
“It would,” in her professional opinion Ava knew Sarah was in the right; an internal loop recorder was advisable in a dysautonomia patient like her girlfriend. She fainted at least two times a week and had over five monitoring periods over one year alone; an implanted device would be so much more efficient.
Sarah’s shoulders dropped in defeat, “He won’t even agree to infusion therapy. He said a port is worst case scenario and ‘we aren’t there yet’.“
“I’m sorry, my love,” Ava opened her arms but waited for her to make the decision. Sarah caved and leaned into her lover, an awkward position given the limited mobility of wooden chairs. Still, she relaxed into familiar arms because it was the only thing she could think of doing in that moment. She was tired, exhausted, and Ava was the only constant she could trust in that moment.
“You’re doing so well,” Ava promised as she used one hand to gently unclench Sarah’s tense fists, “I promise we’ll get the help you deserve.”
“I’m sorry, my love,” Ava opened her arms but waited for her to make the decision. Sarah caved and leaned into her lover, an awkward position given the limited mobility of wooden chairs. Still, she relaxed into familiar arms because it was the only thing she could think of doing in that moment. She was tired, exhausted, and Ava was the only constant she could trust in that moment.
“You’re doing so well,” Ava promised as she used one hand to gently unclench Sarah’s tense fists, “I promise we’ll get the help you deserve.”
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kitweewoos · 4 months
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From the prompt thingy :
19. I saw the brake lights, but not in time.
Hi hi I decided this was Reesker so... here it is!! Tumblr hates me today, so I posted it on ao3, (if you get me your ao3 username, I'll gift the fic to you!)
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pushupcontest · 1 year
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summery reesker mood board ♡
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kaitschicago · 8 months
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HELLO!
Things to know about me!
•I love One Chicago, specifically Chicago Med <3
•There aren’t enough Ava Bekker fans out there
•I write occasionally but mostly I read!
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flyingpotstickers · 1 year
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🤒 Needing to be looked after & reesker :)
Sarah wasn’t used to being looked after, being cared for. It was oftentimes a little more than just a little overwhelming. Sure, she could watch after people - children and adults alike - with no problem, but letting someone look after her? Letting someone in enough to say ‘This hurts’? It seemed impossible.
Until she met Ava.
Ava Bekker challenged Sarah in ways she wasn’t sure she was entirely comfortable with. Sarah Reese, as we have established, was not used to feeling loved. But Ava came in, swooping in really with her cute little salute and promises of we’ll talk later. And then Ava stayed.
Ava stayed and that made the difference --- all of the difference in the world, really.
She had stayed this long, and all but convinced Sarah she would stay longer, when Sarah got sick --- actually called out of work because she couldn’t risk contaminating anyone. Sarah never called out of work.
Ava showed up not even twelve minutes later with soup and a can-she-fix-it? attitude. “Hey, lovey.”  Ava practically cooed out as she took a good look at her friend. “How are you feeling?” It was an unnecessary question, because Sarah looked like crap, but. Ava still asked because she cared.
It made Sarah halfway delirious with the desire to kiss her.
Where did that come from? Sarah cleared her throat.
“Been better,” she rasped out at last.
“I know, darling. I’m sorry.” Ava murmured, soft as she walked into Sarah’s house with no qualms about if she’d been invited. “My aunt has sworn by this soup for decades, so I wanted to bring you some.” she said gently.
“I don’t wanna get you sick, Avey.” Sarah whined, sneezing into her elbow.
“I’m a doctor.” Ava reminded with a smile. “Let me be a doctor.”
“Okay.” Sarah was too tired to be arguing. So she didn’t even try. “What kind of soup?”
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