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#reginald buffalo
battle-of-alberta · 1 month
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Who had the happiest childhood ?
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well over a year later i finally tackle this question! it was at the bottom of the box because one of my weaknesses is drawing children, and another one is the necessary historical research to draw their childhoods :' ) but i really wanted to start imagining them because it's very important to the overall story i'm trying to tell here.
here's the main gang, who were children at one end of the 19th century or another. I don't really know how to answer the question (they all lived through some very rough times, even if they didn't know as much) but I can give a little bit of an explanation for the times they grew up in...
[but most importantly, who do you think was the cutest?]
Ed and Jas were kids in the early decades of the 19th century (the regency era). They didn't really have a sense of the outside world much at all (Ed in particular had a very inflated sense of self importance he has since lost) and moved around a lot to follow the fur bearing animals (typically beavers). I feel like they were often getting into scrapes like this!
Cal and Lil grew up in the 1870s when the Northwest Mounted Police were establishing the Canada-US border. Calvin doesn't realize that his childhood enemy Fort Whoop Up and Lilith are the same person, so he tends to think of Lilith as younger than him. Lilith knows better, of course, but I guess she wanted a fresh start. In some ways, they were both only a bit spoiled as kids, though Lilith was less sheltered.
Jo and Mac didn't really interact much as they were isolated for most of their childhoods and didn't really hit their first growth spurts until the 20th century. It's hard to imagine their childhoods (or that Mac was ever a child haha) but they must have been quite lonely, so I figure they had to have pretty big imaginations to cope during the times Ed wasn't around.
Nor, Red and Maddie grew up in the railroad era of the 1880s-90s, although Nor and Maddie were the railroad resort and energy princesses respectively. Red depended far more on carriages and later vehicles passing through on their way between Ed and Cal's places. [also, do not attempt to cuddle bear cubs or feed them chocolate biscuits!!]
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randomoranges · 3 months
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i lost a wagerino to @allbeendonebefore
i was tasked to draw ét and mac hanging out.
yes, those are sliced cucumbers, so glad you asked. and yes, they do have face goop on that didn't come through the picture, so glad you asked again.
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allbeendonebefore · 1 year
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(this is right to left not left to right sorry)
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going through photos of comics i drew at work in 2019 that i never posted and nothing is funnier to me than this really angsty comic of ed yelling at calvin for ghosting him for 9+ months (and then the smoke alarm going off because he started burning what he was cooking) being immediately followed by this
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acetechne · 1 year
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F6 Mac?
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i think i messed up on his phone case so idk if its clear what it is supposed to be rip. anyway i have been told this is his face after seeing sasquatsch
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I’m sorry. Sir Reginald Hargreeves is a notorious perfectionist, pedant, and performative academic. And you expect me to believe he mounted a bison head on the wall and called it the White Buffalo Suite?
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yesand87 · 2 years
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White Buffalo by Jump, Little Children has me thinking about Klaus and Reginald
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🎶 You make yourself a stranger
Whenever you lie to me 🎶
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ellewriteswrongs · 2 years
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everyone gets why reginald shut klaus out of the portal in ep9, right??
I keep seeing people mentioning the scene without pointing this out and personally it was obvious to me (and my dad who I watched with lol) that ~someone~ was going to get left behind no matter what but idk if that translated for everyone so……prepare for Long Post Time
when reginald mentions the fables at the beginning of the episode, there’s a strong emphasis on there being 7 of everything, go figure lol. it goes to show that with the sparrows, he most likely could’ve adopted them too in s1 but he didn’t because he specifically wanted seven of the kids. each story he reads off requires exactly seven, no more and no less.
the group starts off with nine; six umbrellas, plus ben, sloane, and lila. two too many.
when the vote backfired on him, he does precisely as he tells luther before he kills him—only a death can be powerful enough to bring them all together to do something none of them want to do. in s1 none of them wanted to fight together again, but because they came back for the funeral they couldn’t avoid trying to stop the apocalypse. it didn’t have to be luther, he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. any one of them could’ve been killed in his place, it was simply convenient. if one of them hadn’t gone to the buffalo room on their own, he probably just would’ve used allison’s deal to get her to come in there and kill her instead.
but of course, that leaves us with one more to go.
because reginald makes no effort to hold any particular character to the back of the group as they enter the tunnel, he clearly doesn’t care who he has to leave behind, but rather that the number of people that makes it through is all that matters. I’m convinced he didn’t care that it wound up being klaus that was left even though reginald knew about his powers. if he had been absorbed by the kugelblitz with everything else, he wouldn’t have been dead he would’ve ceased to have ever existed. no afterlife, just *poof* out of existence.
but as usual, klaus is smarter than reginald, or anyone else including himself, gives him credit for. he knew if he died before he disappeared, he’d wind up in the afterlife, which is easy to assume klaus had figured out as the entire world population would’ve wound up as ghosts if getting kugelblitzed truly was the same thing as dying. hence why he knew to kill himself before the kugelblitz had the chance to wipe him out.
despite what he said before he shut the door, it wasn’t just because he thought klaus would get in the way of the plan, it’s because he objectively would. he needed a way to ensure that once they were all being drained of their powers, no one would be left free to stop him from resetting the universe to his own specifications, a-la allison.
he needed seven, no more no less, but he just happened to underestimate his son for the last time in the process.
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'Cause everything's leading me back to [Reginald], back to here, the… the White Buffalo Suite.
Klaus Hargreeves + figuring out Hotel Oblivion
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battle-of-alberta · 4 months
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Nothing serious, I was wandering around Crap Tire the other day and thought of this dialogue. I feel like the main thing Ed and Jo have in common is mundane retail therapy. This is the first thing I've drawn in about of week due to the chaos of travel and family in the hospital, but everything's starting to settle down again and I feel like I can spare the brain space.
My impression is that Jo is always the last to know things because she has a tendency to jump to her own conclusions / overreact / not shut up.
(He doesn't actually appear here but Étienne / MTL belongs to @randomoranges anyway)
Bonus
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fiveisnumber1 · 2 years
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Okay I might be going crazy because there is no clear shot of this image but I swear that this painting in the background of White Buffalo Suite shots is Abigail, Reggie’s wife
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It’s such a formal image compared to the more provocative art that decorates the room. And if it is Abigail that means that Reginald’s main goal with the White Buffalo Suite and Hotel Oblivion has been lurking in the background this entire time both literally and figuratively and no one ever noticed.
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deceasedream69 · 2 years
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Bathtub
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Summary: this is kind of like eleven's ability to contact people by entering a bathtub, but add Reginald to the Mix and you get trauma with it 🤠. Enjoy xoxo
_
- "there has to be another way", I told to the Umbrellas in front of us. Yeah, I had the ability to watch the guardians who were after the portal in the buffalo room, but the way I had to, no thanks. "Why don't we just enter and fight them really hard until they're dead?" I smiled.
- "come on, it's just getting in a bathtub, you're not going to die", said the knifes guy.
- "then you do it", I said sitting down.
- "if she doesn't want to, we can't force anyone", said Five. Finally someone defending me. Even if it was from the other academy.
- "stop being such a crybaby", said Ben.
- "leave her alone, Ben", interfered Sloane. She was the only sister I had now...
- "well, we can't just sit here", said Reginald. "You didn't complain so much when you were younger"
- "you always forced me!" I said really angry at the old guy.
- "forced you to discover your true self, and the possibilities you have"
- "and who forced you to be so manipulative?", I said crossing my arms.
- "this is pointless", said the knife guy exiting the room. The girl with white hair following him.
- "I heard the rumor... That you were going to get in that bathtub and tell us what the guardians are doing and how many are they"
I didn't want to obey, hell, I didn't even want to stand up. But I couldn't control my body. I tried tho.
- "fighting against it won't be any good", she said pulling me from my arm.
I tried to fight against her so hard, but I couldn't .
- "Allison, what the hell are you doing?", Said Five getting close to us. "You wouldn't like to be forced to do something for... For this old man", he pointed at Reginald.
- "we need to end this, Five. End with whatever apocalypse is going on now and just, finally rest"
I put my feet inside without my will. I slid down until I was sitting inside.
- "please...", I whispered, tears in my eyes threatening to spill.
- "allison...", Said Five, Viktor behind him watching everything but too scared to say anything to Allison.
The rest of the team, sparrow and umbrella, entered the room again.
The water was cold, but it was not enough water yet.
My hands gripping the sides of the bathtub. My knees out of the water along with my shoulders and head.
- "finally, you convinced her into reason", said Ben. Until he noticed the white eyes. "What the hell are you doing to my sister?!"
- "it's for our own good", said Allison.
- "let them...", Said Reginald, and obviously Ben obeyed to whatever Reginald had to say.
- "now what?", Asked Allison
- "head in", he said pushing my head slowly first, until he noticed I wouldn't move, and he started to push harder.
When my head was completely in I tried, I really tried to get out, but it was impossible, so I just started my work.
I relax a little, letting myself float in the water. My eyes moving rapidly trying to find the guardians. I found them and when I did I sank.
That was the problem, I always sank, but dad would never let me up until he got all the information he needed.
I drowned twice but he always managed to bring me back.
It was quiet. I started to search quickly, I didn't have too much time.
- "don't ring the bell", I rang the bell and the atmosphere immediately changed, everything felt so... terrifying.
- "what is going on? Why is she under the water completely?", Asked Diego.
- "can't you see? This is the reason why she wouldn't do it voluntarily", said Five annoyed.
- "ok, it's been enough time, maybe we should help her out", said Sloane trying to get close to the bathtub.
- "stop!", Yelled Allison, making Sloane stop immediately.
- "give her some time, I'm sure she'll come up when she's done", said Reginald.
_
- "ahhhhh!", I yelled running away from a guardian with a sword. Stopping suddenly when I saw a spikey ball coming towards me from one side, but it hit the wall next to me. I lowered myself enough to pass under it and kept running.
That makes two guardians.
_
- "she's shaking too much, are you sure she's ok?", Said Luther worried.
Five throwing daggers with his eyes to whoever kept making stupid questions.
- "she's not fine, she's never been fine when dad does this to her", said Sloane with a few tears on her eyes. "And you, you'll never do anything, too scared about what dad could think about you", she said turning to Ben. "But I will".
She threw Reginald to a wall. Trying to pass Allison but
- "I heard the rumor you stopped moving"
Sloane instantly froze.
- "Allison!", Luther started to shake Sloane to "wake her up" from Allison's rumor. "Hey, babe. Allison!"
- "we just need more time"
- "let her free, Allison", said Viktor really calm.
- "just a little bit...", Allison replied.
_
I could feel my lungs burning even from where I was, but I couldn't find the door to get out. Luckily I found something important.
The third guardian.
- "shit", I said running even faster through the halls. Until I heard a click. I turned around, the door at the end of the hall was full open and really shiny. "That must be the door"
I ran as fast as I could, the three guardians right behind me. My lungs feeling more and more heavy, but I did it, I reached the door.
_
*heavy breathing*
I got out of the bathtub, in a really messy way. Five next to the bathtub while the other siblings held Allison back.
- "three guardians! There are three guardians! One with a sword, the other one with a spikey ball and one with... I don't... I don't remember" i said really quickly.
- "shhh, it's ok, it's ok", said Five with a towel on his hands.
- "I'm sorry, I couldn't find the bells", I said tearing up .
- "it's ok, you did amazing", he said helping me out.
Sloane took my hand while I got both my feet out, Five wrapping the towel around me.
I quickly embraced the towel and jumped to Five's arms. Crying hard.
- "I'm sorry", I said pulling away.
- "see, easy, you've been doing it for years"
I glared at him, getting closer and closer.
- "you... Have been trying to drown me since I was two! Two fucking years old!"
He fell to the ground, probably because I was squeezing his neck with my powers.
- "enough!", Yelled Ben, making me stop. I exited the room quickly.
_
- "are you okay?"
- "yeah... Thanks for the towel. Reginald never had even that little bit of decency", i said half joking.
- "I'm sorry", he said getting serious.
- "you don't have to, thanks", I said smiling, him returning the smile.
- "you know, have you ever considered using floats to avoid sinking while you do... That?"
- "oh, geez, thanks, Five. You're really a genius, huh?"
He nudged my arm and sat next to me on my bed. I laughed.
- "my head HAS to be underwater"
- "did you really drown?"
- "twice"
- "oof"
- "and you? You also grew up with him, any trauma?"
He smiled.
- "a little rebellious act of me. But I fixed it after a couple of years, luckily"
- "rebellious act?"
- "don't... Time travel if you don't really have the knowledge to do so"
- "holy shit, you got stuck?"
- "in another apocalypse, but like I said, I literally spent there like two years before I could come back with my family, and then", he said laying down next to me when he noticed I lay down to get comfortable while I heard his story. "We got stuck in 1963. Well, some a few years before, but you get the idea"
- "and then you came back to a new academy with different members"
- "exactly"
- "holy shit. Sounds... Tiring, going from apocalypse to apocalypse"
- "I haven't sleep properly in a week, it's only been a week for me"
- "three... In one week... How are you not falling asleep the minute you touch a bed?"
...
- "Five...?"
I turned around. His eyes were closed but his mouth was slightly open. I chuckled at the cute sight I had.
I stroke his hair a few times and got myself comfortable and fell asleep next to him.
- "my money?", Said klaus extending his hand
- "i hate when you're right", said Ben rolling his eyes while he gave Klaus 10 bucks, walking away from my bedroom right after.
Klaus took the money, smelled it, threw a kiss at our sleeping bodies and also walked away.
The end
I really like this one like wthhhhh
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conduitandconjurer · 2 years
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I’m trying to figure out how to articulate how gutted and desolate I feel about the wedding reception scene, where Klaus goes to every single sibling shy of Allison and tries to convince them to figure out a way to save the world with Reginald.
I’m trying to understand why it makes me nauseous and weepy that he asks Five, and Five is for once the one who has given up and is seeking solace in substance abuse, and Klaus lets him with the first expression of annoyed disappointment I’ve ever seen on his face toward a sibling. 
I’m trying to process how I feel that Lila treated him like an agent of malice and threatened to torture him if he spoke to Diego.
I’m trying to not actually outright sob that he called Luther “baby” and “Lulu” and begged him as desperately as during the days when he was stealing money and valuables for another fix, to consider his new addiction--a fictitious, delusional idea of a real bond with their father, in order to “find his purpose”--and Luther is so desperate to not spend the end of their lives in any form of discomfort (understandable and actually, an interesting mirror) that he bellows at Klaus so loudly, that Klaus ends up curled into a ball, ears covered, audibly whimpering.  It was an exact replica of the times in S1 (in the rave) and S2 (being shot at by Commission agents) when he was covering his ears and freezing from a PTSD flashback.  The way when Luther apologizes and hugs him, he just hangs there in his arms and immediately placates with “sure, that sounds nice,” the way he is just USED to being dismissed out of hand by loved ones, even when they have not even a day of existence in all the universe left....
I’m trying to explain to myself and anyone reading this why this makes me sadder and sicker than the actual “bus-ball” scene in which he repeatedly killed himself to find that sense of purpose, of human value. 
How desperate do you have to still be, to be valued by somebody else, anybody else, that you’ll be complicit with your cardinal abuser, and help him to recruit your siblings in perpetuating that abuse? 
I’m the first person to say Klaus has grown in leaps and bounds this season. And yes, I know that his suicide in the White Buffalo Room marks that he has broken free of Reginald and really is beginning to grasp that he has value irrespective of all Reginald pretended to offer. But it’s still AGONIZING. 
And it makes me sad. It makes me sad that he still has this IMMUTABLE capacity to LOVE.  That he goes to Sparrow Ben and softens him and comforts him, gets him to “open up his kimono.”  That he, ONLY he, pays any attention to Allison, and escorts her onto the dance floor, WITHOUT snubbing Viktor:
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That he treats Sloane with unreserved happiness, with compassion, and officiates the wedding.  Like look at his face in the bg when she comes off the elevator: 
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Good people, no matter how fucked up they are, should not have to endure this. They should not have to scramble for scraps of self-respect, cycling forever downward in self-destructive spirals. I want someone to come pluck Klaus out of all this, yes even after the reset, and just save him from a family that loves him but cannot help him, or each other, or themselves. 
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dumdumsun · 1 year
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To Nightfall
A/N: Happy holidays, y’all! One more chapter!!
Warnings: character death (Klaus, ya know), violence, blood, mentions of blood and death/dying
Word Count: 5130
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Chapter 19: Oblivion
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(Y/N)’s mind was in a frenzy as she barreled down the passageway that glowed in a white patterned light along the walls. She placed her hands on the wall to steady herself so as to not crash into Allison in front of her. She wasn’t certain who was behind her, but she only hoped it was Five or Klaus.
From the front of the line, Lila kicked open the door on the other side of the passageway, the group spilling into the room. Perhaps it was her mind running wild, but (Y/N) was almost certain they had gone in a circle. Despite her limited time in the Buffalo Suite, though, she did notice some differences with the room. The paintings had changed, the furniture was completely different. The biggest difference was the buffalo head that was once over the mantelpiece was now the tail end of a buffalo.
“Let’s never do that again.” Viktor panted.
“What? Narrowly escaped the apocalypse?” Five sarcastically asked.
“Yeah, that’s kind of our thing, isn’t it?” Diego mumbled as he inspected the room, harpoon at the ready. As he returned to the group, Ben was staring at the buffalo before them in wonder, swatting the tail of it with his hand.
“There’s something very wrong about that…”
“Same suite, just ass-backwards.” Lila informed.
“No hyperbole there.” Five frowned.
“This is some hardcore Alice in Wonderland shit.” Ben gasped. Diego tightly smiled.
“Yeah, it only gets weirder.”
From the open door, the final passenger of the caravan bolted into the room. Breathing heavily, Reginald shut the door and leaned against it. “At last,” He breathed. “The other side…”
(Y/N) shook her head and looked around the room. “Hold- Hold on. Where’s Klaus?”
“Children, I’m sorry, but your brother…” He trailed off for a second. “I did all I could, but he didn’t make it through in time. The Kugelblitz has claimed its last victim.”
“Bullshit, he just helped me through! How did you make it and he didn’t?!” She raged. “We’re going back to get him!”
“There’s nothing to go back to, my child.” He went to place a hand on her shoulder, but she moved away quickly, standing at Five’s side, who gently held her as his venomous stare fixated on Reginald. The old man sighed in disappointment. “Children, there will be time for tears later. Right now, we have to keep moving.”
Reginald brushed past them all to leave the room and enter the hotel. When he was gone, everyone took a second to let everything sink in.
“Wait. Luther and Klaus?” Viktor whispered in disbelief. They had lost two more members of their team. It was becoming surreal. More surreal than the incoming apocalypse they had just dodged.
When the lot of them finally decided to follow their father, they all ended up in the lobby. The Hotel Oblivion had much more of a polished hotel decor than Obsidian did, with its shiny checkered floors, lack of tacky furniture, even the pillars shone orange instead of blue.
“You guys should’ve stayed here.” Ben grinned as they walked further into the lobby. “This place is way nicer.”
“Lila and I barely got out alive last time. Remember?”
“Yeah, but I’m here this time, and the numbers are in our favor.”
(Y/N) rolled her eyes at Ben’s smug reply, having enough of his cocky attitude. She much preferred his inebriated self more than the real him. In fact, she preferred her Ben to him.
“Well, whatever it was, it was strong, fast and super pissed.” Lila sighed as they neared the front desk.
“Alright, so, whatever you do, do not ring this bell.” Diego informed, pointing at the brass bell sitting at the desk, a sign with the Japanese language written sitting beside it. “Unless you wanna lose a finger or a tentacle.”
Sloane moved closer to it. “I’ll take my chances-”
“Don’t!” Lila stopped her.
“Get out of my way.”
“To take out this thing, we need to be in the right state of mind.”
At that, a fire crackled in Sloane’s eyes. “State of mind? Do you mean, am I angry? Yes, I am angry. I wanna kill whatever it is that hurt Luther!”
(Y/N) walked up to her sister-in-law and gently placed a hand on her back. “Sloane, we lost both Luther and Klaus. We’re all angry, but if we aren’t careful and smart about this, then we’ll only lose more people. I wanna kill it, too, okay?”
Lila nodded in agreement. “Yeah. When the time is right, we’ll act.”
“Don’t even try it, Five.” Diego called out to his brother, who was approaching the entrance of the hotel, a glaring white light barricaded on the other side. “Doors won’t let you out.”
Five hesitantly walked back to the group as Allison scoffed. “So, what, we’re stuck here?”
“This place is a test and a trap and a means of salvation, all at once.” Reginald spoke.
Viktor motioned towards the bell. “Does anyone know what that sign says?”
“Yeah, it says ‘Do not ring the bell’. That’s what that means.” Diego firmly said.
“We get it, Diego. Bell bad.” Five shrugged. “What do we do? Anybody know?”
A little ways away from them, Reginald had taken out his signature journal as he inspected their surroundings. Everyone’s attention turned to him, awaiting what they hoped was an explanation he was getting to. But he didn’t say anything.
“Reggie?” Allison called out. “Reggie.”
When he didn’t answer, Lila sighed and headed towards the other side of the room. “I’m hungry. Does anyone fancy an unagi roll?”
Ben glared and walked up to her. “How can you possibly eat at a time like this?”
“Shut up, Ben.” (Y/N) mumbled as she walked past him to follow after Lila. Where the alcoholic bar once was now sat a rotating sushi bar, presenting what seemed to be freshly prepared fish. (Y/N) joined Lila at the bar and watched the woman stuff her face for a bit before her curiosity just couldn’t be held back any longer. “Lila?”
“Yeah?”
“We’re friends now, right?”
“Where are you going with this?”
The girl sighed and picked up a piece of sushi. “Are you pregnant?”
Lila nearly choked on her food as she stared at (Y/N) in fear. “What did Diego say to you? Because if he said anything, I swear I’ll-”
“No, no, no.” She shook her head and chewed on the fish in her mouth. “He didn’t say anything.”
“Then how do you know?”
(Y/N) smirked at her. “Lila, I’ve been pregnant twice. I can tell the signs.” She picked up another piece. “Almost every time I’ve seen you, you’ve got food in your mouth and yet, never a drink. Not when we celebrated trapping the Kugel and not at the wedding. Now, we haven’t been friends for long, but you don’t strike me as the type to not drink at all.”
Blinking, Lila swallowed both the lump in her throat and the sushi, but she never stopped eating.
“No wonder Diego’s been so protective of you…” She whispered. “Hey. Bit of advice from a mother to a mother?”
Lila slowly nodded.
“Do whatever you need to do to keep that baby safe,” She gently held her hand. “This is also coming from a childless mother… If we make it out of this, I’d like to meet my niece or nephew.”
A teary smile slowly stretched across Lila’s face before (Y/N) gently patted her hand and hopped off her stool, heading back into the lobby. As she passed Diego, she gave him a proud smile and a nod. She walked right past Reginald without even a glance to him and approached the staircase, where Sloane sat.
The poor woman was trying to clean her blood-stained hands as she sniffled and weeped to herself. (Y/N) saw so much of her past self in Sloane, and she hated that she could empathize with her.
“I’ll help you with that.” She whispered and sat beside her in-law, taking the rag and beginning to clean her hands. It was then that (Y/N) realized that her own hands were also covered in blood. Blinking, she moved the thought away. “I was a widow before I married Five.”
Sloane’s lashes batted the tears out of her eyes and down her cheeks. “You were?”
“Yeah,” (Y/N) nodded, choking on her words as her heart clenched. “I lost my husband and I was left with two very small children who I was not ready to raise alone. I wasn’t strong enough for them, you know? I-I fell into depression and I just… I ignored everything. My responsibilities, my career… the two of them. They didn’t deserve that. They needed me more than ever…”
(Y/N) fell silent for a moment to collect herself. She had never, ever talked to anyone about her neglect towards Michael and Jada. Not even Allison, who was always there for her after Anthony’s death. Now that she was admitting out loud what a horrible mother she thought she was, the sinking in her stomach only plummeted deeper, eating away at her to make her feel even more empty.
She supposed this was her karma after all those times she tuned out Jada’s crying, after all those times she pretended not to hear Michael on a late night complain about how hungry he was. She didn’t deserve her children.
She came back to herself when she realized that the pity party she was throwing was not meant for her, and turned back to Sloane. “What I’m trying to say is that no one gets to tell you how strong you need to be, okay? Because they can say whatever they want, look at you in any way, but nothing can truly prepare you to lose someone you love… I’m kinda losing track at this point. It feels like my whole family is dying.”
“My whole family did die…”
(Y/N) let out a silent sigh before wrapping her arms around Sloane and pulling her close. Sloane sniffled and clung to the girl as more tears cascaded down her face.
From the other side of the room sat Five and Viktor, quietly conversing with one another. “Nah, it’s like the old man said.” The boy whispered, his eyes on Reginald, who was still walking about the lobby. “Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, and three times ain’t gonna happen ‘cause I’m not a gibbering idiot.”
“Well, we can’t be sure he killed Klaus or Luther.”
“You serious? This is his modus operandi. We’ve seen this before. Have you forgotten how we all came together in the first place?”
Viktor sighed as his face fell. “Dad’s funeral.”
“Exactly. He pulled this on you rubes before, and he’s doing it again now.”
“Come on, Five…”
“No. He lost the vote to come through the tunnel, yet here we are.”
Viktor shook his head, not wanting to believe what he was afraid he believed. “Are you really sure that he could kill Luther?”
“I think he could kill Luther, Klaus and the rest of us without breaking a moral sweat. And what’s worse, I think Allison is involved.”
“No, no.” Viktor scoffed, the both of them turning to look where Allison was joining Sloane and (Y/N) on the former’s other side.
Sloane sighed and slowly sat up as Allison cleaned her hands. “I hate to say the things everyone says.”
“Mourning in cliché is the last thing you need to worry about.” Allison rasped, (Y/N) sending her a warning look.
“I know everything is ending,” Sloane sniffled. “...but I thought we’d be together when it happened. I didn’t even get to say goodbye.”
Allison and (Y/N) shared a look before the former gently took Sloane’s hand into hers, wiping it clean with her rag. “I got to say goodbye… to my daughter… and my husband. (Y/N) got to say goodbye to her kids.” She gently spoke. “But it wasn’t enough. And I think she can agree.”
“She’s right. It’s not enough…” (Y/N) whispered tearfully.
“Feelings are just… They’re too big for words. Luther loved you… to the moon and back.”
The three softly chuckled at Allison’s sweet attempt at a joke.
“You made him so happy, Sloane,” (Y/N) gently kissed her cheek. “In all my life, I’ve never seen him smile as bright as he smiled at you.”
Neither of the two noticed how Allison met Reginald’s eyes.
“No, she… she was with Sloane in the tunnel.” Viktor whispered as he watched Allison comfort Sloane.
Five tilted his head slightly. “I’m not talking about Klaus.”
“Luther…? What? No, she would never do that.”
“She’s been unraveling since we got to this timeline.”
“Yeah, she lost her daughter.”
“And she killed Harlan.”
Viktor frowned deeper. “(Y/N) almost killed Dad. She lost her kids and she watched herself die twice. She’s not unraveling?”
“(Y/N) is absolutely losing her mind, but she hasn’t taken any of her pain or anger out on us like Allison has. Dad deserved what he got from her, Allison is the one siding with him. Do not compare them.”
Viktor blinked at the offense in Five’s tone and turned his head back to watch Allison now cleaning (Y/N)’s hands. “Even if you’re right, I can’t imagine they’re just gonna come clean if we confront them.”
“I agree…”
Once her hands were free of blood stains, (Y/N) gave both Sloane and Allison a cheek kiss before descending the staircase. She was just about to head over to Five and Viktor when she caught Ben in her peripheral. He was in another seating area, anxiously wringing his hands as he tracked Reginald’s every move. She knew that look. It was a look her Sparrow self gave him. It was a look she and her siblings gave him when they were young and in his grasp. Ben was still seeking validation from him.
With a sigh, she abandoned her original agenda and walked right up to him. “You know, you can stare at him as long as you want. He’ll still be a total dick.”
Ben shot up to his feet with a heated look. “Excuse me?”
“What, you disagree?”
“He is my father. He’s your father, too. The difference between you and me is respect.”
“He was never a father, Ben!” She quietly hissed so as to not cause a scene. “He was just a man who adopted us! Didn’t you care about your (Y/N)?”
“Of course, I did!” He snapped back in her volume.
“Then why are you still following Reginald? After everything he put her through?”
Ben looked away. “He said it was never his intention to hurt her.”
“Good or ill intent, he still broke her. Even when she was freed from the basement, she was still in his grasp.” (Y/N) blinked back her tears. “That’s the issue with abuse, Ben. You can never truly escape it. But you need to break free now more than ever, because whatever he told you, he didn’t tell you everything. Whatever he’s got planned is only for his benefit, and I know you know that.”
His eyes didn’t leave her even when she walked away to join her husband and brother elsewhere. However, his attention was stolen by Reginald when the man ascended a flight of stairs wordlessly. Ben stood and followed him with furrowed brows. When he reached the top, he saw Reginald examining a grandfather clock, he and Allison having a hushed and heated argument. When they noticed his presence, they ceased their talking, Allison moving past him with a bump to his shoulder. He ignored it and set his eyes on his father.
“What was that all about?”
“That’s none of your concern.” Reginald answered as he scribbled in his journal.
“Not my concern? We’re here now, in the Hotel Oblivion. Just like you wanted. I made that happen.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.” Reginald snapped his book shut. “Allison killed Harlan, and I united the families. What did you do, Number Two?”
He left his son behind and returned back to the lobby. “Gather around, children. Now that we’ve had a chance to catch our breath, the real work can begin.”
Five stood from his seat as everyone collected at the center of the lobby. “Ah, the myth of the seven bells, eh?”
“Exactly. Somebody’s been paying attention.”
“Okay, so we find the bells, then what?” Diego asked.
“No, no, no, no.” Reginald shook his head. “The bells are just a metaphor for this.” He held up his journal to show off a drawing sketch along the pages.
(Y/N) squinted her eyes to get a better look. “A sigil?”
“Correct, my child.”
“Don’t call me that.”
He hesitated, but continued. “The sigil is the key to the seven bells. Once we find this symbol, we’re one step closer to resetting the universe.”
“What do we do when we find it?” Sloane quietly asked.
“I don’t know.”
A collective gasp sounded as Viktor stepped forward. “Excuse me? We’re here because you said you have a plan.”
“I do. Up to a point.”
Lila snickered. “Great. So, we’ll just stay in the hotel forever, staring at the walls and eating bad sushi.”
“Finding the sigil is our only way out of here and the best chance we have of resetting the universe.” Allison spoke up.
“Funny how you and Dad are on the same page again.” Five narrowed his eyes at her. Allison glared at him, which caused Viktor’s want to deescalate the situation before it got ugly.
“Okay, uh, where do we start?”
Reginald perked up. “We’ll split into groups. I will go with Allison and Sloane, Ben, Five and (Y/N) with Viktor.”
“No, we want Allison.”
Five nodded with a sly smile. “Ben for Allison. We’ve trained together, so it makes sense if we take Allison.”
Allison clenched her jaw and scoffed. “Yeah. No, thanks.”
“Why not?” (Y/N) raised a brow, truly confused as to why Allison didn’t want to team with them. Allison looked at her, speechless.
“Splendid idea!” Reginald piped up. “Allison, you go with the Umbrellas. Sparrows, stick together. Everyone take a different floor. We must find that sigil.”
“What about us?” Diego called out.
“You’re a duo.” He waved them off. “Nobody wants to listen to your endless bickering. Now, spread out, leave no stone unturned, and meet back here in thirty minutes.”
Three floors above, the Umbrella team entered one of the bedrooms, Allison and (Y/N) beginning to look through drawers for any sign of a sigil. “Someone went through a lot of trouble to hide this thing.” Allison said.
“How big is it supposed to be?” Viktor asked as he wandered the room.
“You know, dear old Reg didn’t say.”
Five hummed. “Really? Hm. That’s surprising. I figured you’d know more about his plan.”
Allison slowly turned to her brother. “Sorry, what’s that supposed to mean?”
(Y/N) straightened with a frown. “Guys, what’s going on?”
“I saw you and him in the White Buffalo Suite during the wedding.”
“Wait,” She stepped closer with wide eyes. “She’s the person you saw with him?”
Viktor sighed. “I don’t know if now’s the right time-”
Allison interrupted him. “You know, I heard that you blacked out last night.”
“I did, and it took me awhile to remember what I saw, but I do remember, Allison.” Five stalked closer to her with an accusatory finger pointed. “You and Dad made some kind of deal. What did you agree to?”
“A deal?”
“Mmhm.”
“With Dad? Please, tell me you’re joking.”
Viktor stared down. “He’s not…”
At his agreeance, (Y/N) crossed her arms and glared at her sister. “Answer the question, Allison.”
Allison chuckled and turned to her sister. “Oh, you, too? See, this is exactly what I meant,” Her finger waved between the married couple before she turned back to Five. “You’re out of your mind.”
Five leaned closer. “You and Dad make a deal, now Luther is dead.”
“Okay… Luther was killed by whatever the hell that thing is.”
“And Klaus?”
“He didn’t make it into the tunnel.”
But Five didn’t believe her for a second. Neither did his wife. “You know, your deal is costing people their lives.”
“Do you really think that I made a deal with Dad to kill Luther and Klaus?”
She looked between her siblings, and while none of them answered, their expressions said enough. Viktor guiltily avoided her gaze, (Y/N) was still measuring her with her eyes and Five continued to stare her down with an unwavering certainty. She was losing them.
“I’m done.” She moved past them to leave the room. “I’ll meet you in the lobby.”
“Hey… Hey, wait, no.” Viktor sighed and then scoffed at Five before hurrying to catch up with his sister. “Allison. No, just listen to me.”
Five shook his head and looked to his wife, who was frustratedly tapping her foot. “So, her apology to me was bullshit, huh?”
“Afraid so, my love.” He swiftly brought her hand into his and began out the room. “Let’s go before we lose ‘em.”
When the two stepped out of the room, something (actually, many things) were off. For one, the hallway was much smaller than it was before. Five called out for his siblings as he walked towards one end of the hall up to a plant that was not there before. (Y/N) rushed up to the other end of the hall, where three paintings hung on the wall. She pushed against them in case they would lead her into another secret room, but the wall didn’t budge.
“Okay, what the hell is going on?”
“Now the real fun starts.” Five clicked his tongue and walked back into the very different bedroom they had just exited. (Y/N) followed him in, dread settling into her heart when she realized they were now on the fifth floor.
On the third floor, Allison was still storming away from Viktor. “No, I’m done with the three of you and your conspiracy theories.”
“Come on. Just listen to me-”
“Why should I?!” Allison whirled on him after pressing the elevator button. “Huh?! You’re the ones who voted to stay and die. You’re the ones who said to hell with family and the whole universe. I’m the only one fighting to save both.”
“We just need to know what Dad is planning before more of us get killed.”
Allison, once she realized they were two people short, moved past Viktor to look around the corner. “Where the hell are Five and (Y/N)?”
Viktor followed. “They were right behind me. Five?” He walked back down the hall in search of his siblings. He stopped in the doorway of the bedroom, but neither of them were there. “(Y/N)?”
Back on the fifth floor were Sloane and Ben, the former moving picture frames in search of the sigil while the latter leaned against the wall and ridiculed her. “Ooh, don’t forget to check under the plants.”
“Get off your ass and start inspecting the walls for hidden compartments.” She sharply spoke. Ben pushed himself off the wall and knocked on it.
“Hey, uh… here’s a wall and, uh…” He knocked on another. “Oh, here’s another wall.”
She rolled her eyes and opened a door to one of the rooms. “What the hell is wrong with you? People are dying left and right, and you’re acting like a sulky teenager.”
“You sound just like Dad.” He growled as she moved to another room. At his retort, she whipped her head back to him and shut the door.
“Why is it so important for Dad to like you? He doesn’t define you or us. We made our own mark in this world without him.”
“As the Sparrow Academy, but they’re gone now.”
“He was never a Sparrow! He was our dad, and a shitty one at that! You don’t need him.”
He sneered. “Easy for you to say when you’ve already got a new family.”
She deeply inhaled as her lip quivered, pointing a finger at him. “And the best part of that family just died.”
Their argument was interrupted when Five and (Y/N) rounded the corner, hand-in-hand. “I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Five started as his wife went up to Sloane and shared a hug with her. “I’m actually glad to see you guys.”
“What’s wrong?” Sloane looked down at her.
“There’s something seriously wrong with this hotel. We were just two floors down and now we’re here the next second. It’s like the place is alive.”
Ben frowned. “We should get to the lobby.”
“Tried it.” Five shook his head. “Whatever direction we choose, we end up in the same spot.”
“Or maybe you two have no sense of direction.”
(Y/N) bristled. “Alright, douchebag, lead the way.”
Ben gave her a look before doing just that, the teens parting to make room for him. They let Sloane in front of them before they joined hands and followed them. On the third floor, Allison and Viktor were looking for the two of them, calling out in hopes they’d call back.
“(Y/N)?”
“Five?” Viktor called before sighing. “Where are they?”
“How the hell am I supposed to know?!” Allison hissed.
“Come on. We can’t keep doing this.” He stopped the both of them. “Please, how do we get back to the way things were? You know, before that fake apology and-”
“And the lies?”
Viktor nearly groaned in frustration. “Allison, come on. How do we do that?”
She stopped and stared at him for a second, biting her lip before she inhaled. “I don’t know that we can.”
Suddenly, the entire hotel shook and rumbled, the lights above them glowing a bright yellow as the ceiling lamps swayed with the force of the shaking. They planted their feet to keep from falling and surveyed the area around them, the air shifting as an ominous tone settled within the many halls of the hotel.
“We should get back to the lobby.” Allison led Viktor back where they came from. “Which one of our moronic siblings do you think rang the damn bell?”
A few feet ahead, a figure broke through the wall and stood before them. This figure was large in stature, covered in armor with a mask-like face covering in the shape of a tiger on its face. Before either could react, it swiped its large ax through the air and cut into Allison’s arm, sending her to the ground with a gut-wrenching wail of pain.
“Allison!” Viktor cried out. Glaring up at the guardian, he summoned his blue energy and blasted it to him, sending the armor-clad figure down the hallway and skidding across the floor. Immediately, Viktor dropped to the ground to help up his sister and get her as far away as possible. “Allison, we gotta go! Allison, get up! Let’s go!”
The guardian twirled his ax in the air before darting after them. On a different floor, the quartet had rounded a corner the same time as another guardian. This one looked similar to the first, only its mask was different and it held a katana rather than an ax. Spotting its targets, it snarled and swiped its katana through the air, holding it up at the ready.
“Really? A samurai?” Ben deadpanned.
This must have been it. The thing that killed Luther. Sloane tried to remember Diego’s description of the possible weapon used, but all she could remember was “blade”. That was all she needed. With a war cry, she charged up to the guardian. It headed right for her, but before it could send its blade into her, she flipped around it, ending up behind the guardian. It turned around and swiped its katana down, but halted when Sloane used her power to stop it. It was clear that she was struggling, though. She was going to need help.
“Revenge looks good on her.” Ben smirked. Five and (Y/N) rolled their eyes.
“Would you shut up and help us kill this thing?” The boy scoffed as he went up to an ax hanging on one of the doors. He grabbed it and went to blink closer to the guardian, but stopped when (Y/N) grabbed ahold of it. His eyes widened in astonishment when she duplicated the weapon. “Where the hell did you learn that?”
She smiled before sending her ax into the wall next to her. From its shadow, she pulled out a duplicate of that ax, along with a clone of herself from her own shadow, its hands tightly clutching the weapon as it was summoned from the wall. (Y/N) turned to Five and cocked her head.
“My sister taught me.”
Ben leaned against the wall and watched the three lunge for the guardian, hacking axes and manipulating gravity in an attempt to defeat it. Below them, Viktor was assisting Allison in hurriedly rushing down halls to get to safety. When he saw the sign for the spa, he urged her forward. “Here, here. Go, go, go.”
She ran inside and leaned against a pillar, holding her bleeding shoulder in agony. Behind her, Viktor shut the door and rushed her towards the back of the spa, behind the last tub. “We need… We need to tie off that wound.”
Allison whimpered and groaned as Viktor acquired a towel. “You were right, okay? I made a deal with Dad.”
Viktor ripped the towel and looked up at her. “Luther and Klaus?”
“No, I had nothing to do with that. I swear.” She winced. Viktor quickly wrapped the towel around her arm and tied it roughly, Allison crying out.
“Why tell me now?”
“Because I need you to believe me, okay?” She panted as he let go. “That I did this for all of us. Luther and Klaus, too.”
He shook his head. “What did he offer you?”
“I need you to trust me.” She whispered. “Look at me. If we get through this, everything’s gonna be okay.”
The door to the spa fell in, granting access to the guardian. This one was different, though. Yet again, it had a different mask and held a chain. One end of the chain held a mace, and the other end held a sickle. It swung the end with the mace before sending it forward, blowing the tub to pieces when it crashed into it. Allison and Viktor split ways and flew out of different exits to avoid the blast.
“Viktor?” Allison called out from the ninth floor.
“Allison?” Viktor called out from the fourth floor.
—————————————
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seconds-not-decades · 2 years
Note
It takes place during the last episode of season three when they fight the Three Guardians. The reader begins to tangle with Reginald Hargreeves, telling him clearly that she didn't trust him and that it was his fault that Luther was dead.
Reginald begins to tell her that he knows very well what had happened before in the past of the reader and that he knew for her back, nobody understands then the dad Reginald he takes the arm of the reader and places her back to the Hargreeves and ripping her shirt off (I hate their dad 🥲) she struggles screaming then she falls to her knees, completely traumatized and Five tries to hide her whipped back.
The last guardian they didn't kill at first arrives and Five tries to protect the reader as best he can and just as Five's hand was severed the guardian steps forward to finish off Five but the reader steps between the two and the guard sticks his saber into the reader's abdomen and Five catches her as she falls as she tries to stay awake, Five begs her to keep her eyes open.
There you go I know a little sad all this 🥲😂
To Love and Protect {Five Hargreeves x Fem!Reader}
Summary: Upon hearing about Luther's untimely death, you corner Sir Reginald and interrogate him, but he turns the table onto you and reveals his knowledge about your abusive past, in which Five rescues you from him. After facing off against the last guardian, fate has to choose between taking you or Five. However, you make the move first.
Pairing: Five Hargreeves x Fem!Reader
Author's Note: Here is a very angsty part two to Books and Banter. Please feel free to reblog and comment!
Edit: We've made 132 NOTES!!! Thank you so much!💙
Requested By: The lovely @madlixxxx🎹
Word Count: 1217
Content Warning(s): Major Season 3 spoilers! Mentions of abuse, Sir Reginald being terrible as always, mini panic attack, blood, violence, scars, injury, cursing, and death.
ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : Unsteady
0:00 ───|────── 0:00
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*Edit below is mine, please give credit if you use it*
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~ * ~
You couldn't believe it. Luther and Klaus were dead. And now everyone was seemingly stuck in Hotel Oblivion. You hated how it felt to be here. You felt like something was wrong. Obscurely wrong. And not just from what Diego and Lila have told everyone.
They weren't kidding when they talked about whoever cut off Diego's fingers. The guardians were horrible to fight. You, Sloane, Five, and Ben barely made it out alive. When everyone got back to the lobby, Klaus was waiting.
While everyone was fighting and conversing about their experiences against the guardians, you took it on yourself to go interrogate Sir Reginald. Your blood was boiling and you had your suspicions about Luther's death. It was not coincidential timing when Sir Reginald showed up back at the White Buffalo Suite. It was like he planned it. And that scared you. If Sir Reginald was bold and brave enough to kill two Umbrella members, who's to say he won't kill everyone else?
"Y/N! What are you doing? You should be finding the sigil with the others!" Sir Reginald was taken back to see you.
"I don't care about some sigil," you seethed. "What I care about is whatever the hell you did to Luther!"
"Me? What are you insinuating? That I killed him? Why would I kill one of my own children?"
"Because you're insane and psychotic and a cold-hearted schemer!"
"Well, those are quite some outlandish accusations. I say I find them quite offensive!"
"I don't give a shit. What your next move? More death? Destruction? Are we all just pawns in your game of life and death?"
"I think I have heard quite enough from you," Sir Reginald cut you off coolly. "That Number Five has rubbed off on you. I see that now."
"Why is Oblivion so important to you? What is this about?"
"That is none of your concern."
"I think it is since I'm here," you bit out in a low voice. "In fact, it's all of our concern. I don't trust you. You killed Luther! Admit it!"
Sir Reginald scoffed. "You need to learn to keep your impossibly loud mouth quiet. Do you not happen to recall where your voice used to leave you when you were younger?"
Your eyes grew huge from that and you took a small step away. You felt like his words cut across your already scarred back.
"Yes, I know your history. I know where you came from and what you endured," he took a menacing step towards you.
"Dad! What are you doing?" Klaus loudly asked from where he was.
"Y/N! Where are you?" Five called out from behind where you were.
"Stay away from me! Don't come any closer!" you exclaimed, a bit fearful now.
You could fight, yes…but could you hold your own against someone as powerful and dangerous as him? You really didn't want to find out.
"You know, I can help you. I can take away your pain. I can make sure nobody hurts you again," Sir Reginald continued as you started backing away from him.
"Dad!" you heard Klaus's voice come closer.
"Over there!" Diego saw you two.
"What do you want from me? How do you know about my history?" you questioned, glancing down to see the Hargreeves race over to where you all were.
"You've been through too much pain and suffering, my dear Y/N. So much that my children could never comprehend," he said. "I can help the others understand why you protect your back so much. I can help them understand why you hide all this!" Sir Reginald suddenly ripped your cardigan off, causing you to scream when you realized he had exposed your back to the others.
Though you had a shirt on, the back of it still revealed enough of your scars to terrify you.Five suddenly blinked to your rescue. You dropped to the ground as Five tried to hide you, blinking both of you out and up to the second level.
"Hey, hey, hey. I'm here. You're safe, I've got you," he draped his jacket over you, barely in controll of his anger. "Breathe, Y/N, please!" he gathered you into his arms.
You were crying into his chest, trembling horribly as your heart raced and your head spun. You felt like the world was caving in and you couldn't breathe correctly.
"Shhh. Listen to me. Listen to my voice. You're okay. I've got you," he murmured into your ear soothingly.
You felt lost at sea and Five was your anchor. You tried to hear his voice through your raging thoughts, clinging to the sound.
"Breathe. Take a deep breath with me, okay?" he continued, breathing in deeply and you mirrored it.
The more oxygen you got in, the clearer your head got. You felt yourself beginning to calm down.
"That's it. You're doing great, love. In through the nose, out through the mouth," he prodded you, gently running his fingers through your hair.
You finally felt stable enough to look up at him through watery eyes. "F-Five…he…Reginald…"
"Shhh! I know, my love, I know. And I…I should have been with you, so I could have stopped him," he shook his head, full of pained guilt.
"How did he know?" you whispered hoarsely. "How?" your voice was shaky.
"I don't know, which scares me," Five admitted softly, hugging you tightly and protectively.
"Did…Did they all…see me?"
Five snuck a glance over at his siblings, who were engaging Sir Reginald in a heated argument. "I…I don't know. I was more focused on getting you to safety so they couldn't…" he adjusted his jacket over you a bit more.
You faintly nodded, curling up in his embrace. He sighed, kissing your forehead softly and comfortingly.
"Are you okay? Or going to be okay?" he gazed down at you worriedly.
"I…I don't know. I'm scared."
"I'm here. I won't let anyone or anything get to you. I'll protect you," Five promised.
You took a deep breath again and gave him a soft smile. The two of you slowly got to your feet as he looked down below at the lobby. More or less the lobby floor.
"Five?" you asked, noticing a thoughtful, deep frown upon his face. "What's wrong?"
"Hey, I found the sigil!" he yelled to the others. "It's on the-"
A crash occured from above and everyone screamed when the fourth guardian came down. Five yelled out in pain as the two of you fell to the ground. You gasped in horror when you saw his left arm in half.
"Five, no! Oh God!" you raced to his side, trying to help him get his tie undone to stop the bleeding.
"Watch out!" he shouted, seeing the guardian swinging his weapon.
"No!" you exclaimed, jumping in front of him.
You inhaled sharply, feeling a harsh pain in your abdomen. You looked down to see blood stain your shirt.
"Y/N!" Five grabbed you and blinked away from the guardian.
When you two reappeared, you collapsed in his arms, gasping for air.
"No! No no no, oh my God…" he was frantically trying to stop the bleeding with his only arm. "Stay with me! Don't close your eyes! I...I'm gonna save you, just hold on, love!"
"I…can't hold on…" you choked out, feeling your life leave you slowly.
"Keep your eyes open for me, sweetheart, please! Stay awake!" he begged, grasping your hand.
You tried. You tried so hard, but your eyelids were getting too heavy and Five's voice was becoming too distant. You were exhausted and soon you sank into his arms, not able to stay awake any longer.
~ * ~
148 notes · View notes
beeceit · 2 years
Text
Klaus has died and come back 56 times, he’s 34, that’s close to 2 deaths a year before the whole busball incident we’ve seen him die in the ambulance in the first episode, in the club with luther, in the white buffalo suite. We don’t know how many times he’s overdosed or how many times og Reginald killed him in that mausoleum He’s a frail little shit and I love angst, I’m choosing to believe every sibling has killed him on accident at least once. after all, if he’s been on drugs since like 13, they’re probably not gonna be too surprised if he seemingly passes out in the middle of roughhousing. hell, maybe licking that 9 volt battery electrocuted him
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