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thephantomporg84 · 5 years

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[REDACTED] be complaining reg. the reactions of having "placed the cultist island Fortuna off the coast of Florida" while having the gall of "It’s the story & the way it’s told that should fucking matter" & "Who cares? It’s fictional geography, you idiots." Feels a bit like failing World-Building 101. I mean, Red Grave based on London would also be a callback to Dante's early concept of being a Brit.

Someone already sent me the whole post of hers that I’m pretty sure you’re referring to lmao. I’m in a particularly cunty but pleasant mood rn, and analysis is kind of my thing, so lets’s break it down, shall we?

Maybe someone can send this her way and… learn that tiny little brain of hers a thing. 😉

It’s fictional geography called world building, you idiots Karen after the cut:

‘I love how a number of shitheels have screeched amongst themselves on this hellsite about how I had placed the cultist island Fortuna off the coast of Florida or somewhere around the Gulf US states (re: the fanfic & project link in my header), whining that it should’ve been in Europe, namely Italy.’

An admission to stalking profiles is not exactly the best way to start a self-righteous rant or advertise your… magnum opus, but go off, I guess.

‘Not only that, but they whined about “plotholes and inconsistencies” without elaborating on what the latter are. The asshole who made the rant was annoyed when I used a poem as a spell in the story (“if I heard that, I’d turn off my PS4.”), but I’m sure she didn’t bitch about the cutscene before the last Agnus boss fight in DMC4.’

Like the movie The Room (2003), it’s just easier to say “all of it” is bad because “all of it” contains plotholes and is inconsistent in tone, has terrible half-baked ideas and plot threads that remain unresolved and/or do nothing to further the plot, is rife with poor + inconsistent characterization, has a lack of any knowledge how the medium it exists in is made, and in general makes me wonder how much pottery enamel you’ve been huffing to think any of this was a good idea. Howeverrrr, in contrast to you, Tommy Wiseau is kind of odd and weirdly charming both in general and about his terrible movie — he’s found glory and success in its terribleness. You, in contrast, remain a miserable cunt with delusions of grandeur.

Dante and Agnus’ Shakespeare bit is actually a pretty well known trope called Ham-to-Ham Combat. Dante and Agnus are both ridiculous Large Hams in DMC4, and when two Large Hams meet, in general, they are likely gonna try to ‘out-over dramatic’ each other. This can lead to a scene becoming either really funny or really corny (or both) really fast. If things go too far — and they do, in this case — the scene can become a Hormel Event Horizon.

‘…but they LOVE the plotholes & inconsistencies if Capcom makes the latter, and writes a terrible story! And Crapcom’s canon for DMC is as straight as a paperclip or a dog’s hind leg. Hypocritical pricks.’

Subjective opinion is not, and never will be, objective fact. People are, as of when I checked again in the last ~5 minutes or so, absolutely able to enjoy whatever media they want regardless of what the general consensus on the quality of that media is.

As an example, I enjoy The Room (2003) despite its terribleness and it never fails to make me laugh, while your magnum opus makes me want to huff pottery enamel so the pain will stop despite you thinking it is the work of an idiot savant.

‘They were also mad that I wrote Dante as a wiseguy who is a little more low-key about it due to the circumstances— instead of being a pathetic manchild airhead that tries too hard.’

You didn’t write Dante.

You wrote Reboot!Donte — a fucking terribly out of character version of him, at that.

‘I was primarily concerned about moving the story along. I didn’t care about where a fictional island is supposed to go.’

You literally had one (1) job, Karen.

‘…Meanwhile, not a single character in DMC4 had an Italian accent, so uh, why should I give a flying fuck where I put it?’

Haven’t you been like… shitting on the DMC staff… for terrible writing… this enti— You know what? You’re obvs way too dumb to notice that contradiction, so I’ll let it slide.

Just… a word of advice, if I may? Don’t ever watch dub TV shows. That last brain cell would fuckin’ just burst all over your carpet.

(Actually, don’t watch subtitled shows either. An extremely popular anime that was set in Italy just wrapped and all the characters — le gasp! — spoke fucking Japanese. You would shit.)

‘I wasn’t paid to write any of what I wrote, but be my guest & send a PM if you want to throw money at me. By all means, do that.’

Oh, thank fuck, because they would have been ripped off, big time.

[ btw, you sound p. jealous of people that write/do creative work/commissions for ko-fi/payment tho. Not a good look tbbh. If it’s any consolation, though, I don’t get paid for making fun of you and/or analyzing your dumb bullshit, either. :( ]

‘The pricks at Capcom didn’t even bother giving us a proper DMC4 and it was a half-assed game, with the latter half being hasty filler material. The “special edition” they coughed up in 2015 was just glorified overpriced DLC.’

Ya know, you gotta be pretty far up your own ass to think this much of your opinion. And I’m saying this as a person that’s pretty far up her own ass like 85% of the time.

‘And another thing, Redgrave City in DMC5 seems to be in England, yet no survivors speak with English accents or slang/dialects.’

Pretty sure no survivors had speaking roles.

If you played the game you’d know this.

‘Meanwhile, Dante and Vergil had lived there when they were kids (until age 8), but they both have ordinary American or Canadian accents. Furthermore, how did the twins make it to the USA or Canada? According to the little booklet in the DMC1 game case, Dante’s office is in modern America.’

You know that invoking the imagery of a specific place without naming your location is normal and standard practice, right? Overwatch even does this (For Ex: Byōdō-in (平等院), Uji, Kyoto Prefecture, Japan is the inspiration for Hanamura, Château de Duingt, Duingt, France for Château Guillard, etc.)

Furthermore, you know the original DMC was a rejected first draft of Resident Evil 4, right? This is what retcon is for. You at least know what retcon is, right?

‘…That information isn’t very important, but I’m bringing it up to illustrate a point that being a fucking pedant about geography in a fantasy game is idiotic, even if the setting is akin to modern Earth.’

So is freaking the fuck out and sending death threats over a fantasy game but you didn’t let that stop you either lmfao.

It’s actually super important to establish your scenery and the way your world operates, especially in a written work in which readers are dependent on your vision and your descriptions, and if you were a decent writer, you’d know this.

‘It’s the story & the way it’s told that should fucking matter.’

YOU HAD ONE (1) JOB, KAREN.

‘What US states are the Arklay Mountains located in?’

General description puts them in the U.S. Midwest. Raccoon City itself is stated to have a population of ~100,000 at the time of outbreak, and the only city in the Midwest that matches that population in 1998 is Springfield, Missouri, with a pop. of ~110,000.

Springfield is on the Springfield Plateau of the Ozarks region of SW Missouri. So they’re part of the Ozark Mountains.

This all took less than ~3 minutes to google, btw.

‘Where is “Zanzibar Land?”’

I actually just wrote a comprehensive answer to an ask a few weeks ago about this. It’s actually stated to be in Tselinoyarsk (Целиноярск), the (fictional) area of the former USSR in which Big Boss carried out the Virtuous Mission/Operation Snake Eater in 1964. Tselinoyarsk itself is heavily implied to consist of parts of Kyrgyzstan and/or Tajikistan. If you played MGS3 you’d know how important the setting and the varied environments/climates are to the game mechan-

oh yeah wait you believe in segregation of story and gameplay mechanics. I forget you’re completely tone deaf sometimes lmao.

How far is ‘Salem’s Lot or Derry from Bangor? Who cares?’

Stephen King does, quite a bit. He even has a map on his website of ‘his’ fictional version of Maine:

My disappointment is immeasurable, Karen.

#anonymous #replies #porg drama #derelict-stranger #derelict stranger #dmc #devil may cry #dmc5 #devil may cry 5 #dante #dmc dante #dmc fanfiction #dmc meta #writing #ao3

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swampgallows · 5 years

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blizzcon recap, basically a big stream of consciousness text dump while i still remember things and i will make a refined post later i think

Thursday morning I went to bed around 3am, woke up at 630am, and then again at 730am to board my 840am train bound for anaheim. I had originally intended to drive myself to the con but decided against it, as I didn’t want to pay $60 for parking nor endure the stress of driving on the freeway solo for the first time.

I took a lyft to my hotel and met up with sun (who gave me kandi!!!) and their husband aaron, then we went to claim our badges and make some store purchases.

after feverishly texting reglei we caught sight of each other in line, got tired of waiting, then made our way to disneyland. there we met up with zach and kept missing fitze by mere moments; finally caught fitze & friends at the river belle terrace (a place i have never been in before because despite my many years of being a passholder, there was never a reason or time for a sit-down restaurant experience at disney, so when i opened the door i IMMEDIATELY closed it thinking i was intruding on a private dinner event LMAO). we knocked out everything on the western side of the park (including a fry-filled splash mountain) and got some good pics. the ride on indy was one of the best i’ve had in years: no stalling, great speed, and tons of jerks that nearly threw me out of the jeep hell yeah. perce made it to disneyland in the evening and we got to enjoy space mountain, star tours, a second round of pirates, a VERY invigorated spin on the teacups, then left at closing. zach generously dropped us all off at our individual hotels before heading out himself.

around 2am i woke up convulsing with an anxiety attack and took half a med. i was scared i had woken up sun and aaron but they were coincidentally also awake. after some talking and goofing off with them we made the very informed decision to postmates some del taco to the hotel at 3am. my god was it worth it. i had selected the “fries and secret sauce” option, unaware that these ingredients were not sides, but components to be added to the inside of the burrito. wasn’t bad!

7am wake up for day 1 of the con. met for “breakfast” with perce and reg at the hilton starbucks, which said that they accepted rewards but then didn’t :| i sincerely dont even remember what we did first as everything in the con was so purely awesome and overwhelming. The opening ceremony brought tears to my eyes, of course, as it displayed “WELCOME HOME” on every stage. We mostly just traveled around the con, taking pics, learning the layout, and mentally digesting everything. We attended the VA panel in the early afternoon which was a GREAT decision (no spoilers if you haven’t watched the virtual ticket stream yet!!!) and then made our way to the main stage, where we parked for a good 5-6 hours for the WoW and HotS “What’s next?” panels, then the following WC3 reforged insight panel and, finally, the entire community night. i really want to make sure i grab clips of some of darin de paul’s mcing that night because the man was sawing at my heartstrings like a viola bow. i got very close to crying many times. have no fear put on another amazing performance—this time a wow track called “war mode”—and won the talent contest! we had the privilege of running into them after the performance to congratulate and get some pics w them. i also met up with hinz who i haven’t seen in forever and we got to talk about his brewing and the con! had blaze pizza for dinner then passed out.

breakfast at coco’s for day 2 of the con, this time with sun and aaron in tow. all i needed was hot cocoa and a slice of dark chocolate chip cheese pie. it was...so goddamn good. we started off the con with the warcraft sounds panel featuring the zone of drustvar and concluded with some great performances by david arkenstone and the tavern band. they performed the zandalari zocalo music and bloodsail, an old favorite! we puttered around the darkmoon faire until the build-a-panel featuring zone design in warcraft but couldn’t hear anything due to the acoustics of the stage, so i left to pick up my blink purchases with fitze. there i met a girl wearing kandi and traded with her; she gave me a rubber bracelet from a podcast she’d attended called ‘pwncast’ that reads ‘we bow to no one’ which is VERY garrosh. other than that we had a grand old time of waiting in a line we didnt have to wait in and then made our way back for the warcraft Q&A. the second i saw metzen i immediately screamed with awe and terror and then sobbed into my lap. perce and reg comforted me, and the rest of the panel was fairly uneventful. I think i was the one human being who shouted ‘woo!’ at the scott johnson’s mention of his interviews with metzen, lol. we were waiting for meggo to have a chance to ask her question but she didn’t get the opportunity :(

after the q&a we went over to the unofficial tumblr meetup organized by questifer which was a huge privilege and a lot of fun, and we even made some new friends. i spilled my spaghetti about garrosh to actual blizzard quest developers and im very embarrassed that i did. lmao. i really liked the casual atmosphere of just chilling on the floor though. fitze had to leave halfway through :( but the quest discussion went on for almost 2 full hours. it was really a humbling opportunity.

by that time, the closing ceremonies were underway. reg and i missed out on the hots finals so we just bummed around the overwatch arena for a bit just to see the thing and catch a few minutes of kristian nairn’s set. again, cool stuff, but nothing i can go nuts to lmao. it’s questing music to me. on our way out of the hots stage i ran into a dude wearing KIKWEARS and gave him kandi!! it was awesome lmao. we spent some ducats at the darkmoon faire, but the real prize was won as we were walking out and scored the literal actual absolute last three available boxes of lucio-ohs!!! mine had a hole punched in it so we ate a bit of it before returning to blaze pizza for dinner again. the cereal tastes like lucky charms to me! it’s very sweet, but good!

sunday morning perce, reg, and i secured a breakfast at dennys. when i went up to pay the check i saw the cashier was wearing a piece of kandi and i had the perfect piece for her, the “short stack” piece with the pancake eraser. she traded me the one piece she was wearing (!) which said ‘insomniac’ (obv haha). i made that kandi a while ago and it feels like it was fate for this moment to arrive. reg and perce and i all parted ways back to our individual hotels. i was just chilling in the lobby when i saw a woman wearing kandi, so i went over and introduced myself. she traded me a piece that said mermaid on it, due to my “mermaid hair” :> we started talking about phat pants and she said her daughters now wear the pairs she used to wear! and the kandi she chose was the “a book for ants” with the miniature bible on it, as she found it appropriate for her halloween “christian protest” where she blasted tchami and malla and had a totem that encouraged ‘sinners’ to dance with her, lol.

i excused myself for the restroom and she invited me to “come back and hang out!” so i did!! and when i returned the group was playing a fun card game called chameleon. and have no fear was playing with them!! daniella, one of the performers from the talent contest (they sang the song about vanilla wow), had also joined us. so i got to play the game with a few members of the group and made some new friends, leigh (who gave me kandi) and jaime/ace, who i talked to about old school raving and kandi for a bit. there was a point where everyone but ace went up to the room for their luggage so it was just the two of us sitting there talking, and a pair of guys came up to us holding some merch. “Do you guys want these? we bought too many loot crates.” i was stunned!! they handed me a shadow plush and a clip-on ganymede to ace.

when they all returned, they were trying to plan what to do next, and i told them i had to grab a lyft and start heading to the train station. leigh offered me a ride there!!! i really felt PLUR for the first time in ages, lmao. we all hugged each other and said our goodbyes.

arriving at the train station, i ran into other blizzcon people and we talked about wow the ENTIRE ride home. for the first leg of the journey it was a super full train and we all had to stand but it was okay. we were all enthusiastically talking about wow with zero awkward pauses or any points of contention. it was so amazing just thriving on each other’s hype. at one point another person on the train said “do you guys play this game or MAKE this game?” because we were talking about it in such detail LOL. we all traded battletags before i had to go. it felt really amazing to be able to just literally talk to strangers about something i love and have such an amazing conversation like that. it felt so awesome to just be connecting to people so deeply all the time.

im going to try to preserve the memory of being able to connect to people like that, as i came home and felt isolated and disconnected from everything again. i want to keep riding the coattails of this positivity as long as i can so i’m not going to go into the details of that. a lot of us really felt we could come out of our shells; i kept stressing how “safe” blizzcon was; with all of the focus i’ve been making in therapy on vulnerability, connection, isolation, and the need to feel worthy of being loved, i want to keep these memories at the forefront while i try to forge a better future for myself.

i really hope i can go again next year!

#blathering #blizzcon

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xiiaoxiing · 6 years

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Links page. Long Post

OW esports links:

Blizzard:

OWL ; OW contenders ; OWWC

APEX (discontinued):

Season 1 ; Season 2 ; Season 3 ; Season 4 ;

APAC & OWPS (discontinued):

APAC 2017 (CN) ; OWPS (CN) Groups ; Preseason ; Reg and Post Season ; Finals;

OGN Super Match Seoul :

tba

Overwatch GeForce Cup (discontinued):

tba

Blog Links:

owl: (player specific tags to be linked later)

SFS :

BU :

FM :

HO :

PF:

LDSF:

SD:

DF:

LAV:

LAG:

NYXL:

SHD:

Condenders: |

All

TW region:

CN region:

AUS region:

General : clips | art

Personal: ramblings | face | art | ow highlights

Personal blog | art blog

#pages

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kinsale42-blog · 6 years

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Invitations (part 4)

Hanzo nodded slightly as he gazed at the city lights. “It is possible that it is. I still expect that there are elements that wish to ensure I never return to reclaim the Shimada empire, and those that would seek revenge for losses incurred in the empire’s fall. Perhaps they exist, perhaps they do not. So, yes, I do look for assassins around every corner and atop every building, but it has become so much a part of my nature that I do not always notice it.” He turned his head back towards his companion. “And I assume you already have a plan in mind to extricate yourself from this situation if it does not proceed the way you intend.”

“I, uh…” Jesse was startled to realize Hanzo was right. He hadn’t even been consciously aware of it, but he’d been marking exits and thinking of excuses the entire afternoon and evening in case things went sideways. “I guess we both have work to do, if we want any sort of peace, eh?” He took a pull on his cigar.

“I am beginning to believe that to find peace, one must accept what one is, and choose to live anyway. A considerable challenge.”

He wasn’t sure if that was meant to have subtext, but something within Jesse took it as a call to action. He stubbed out his cigar half-smoked, and said, “Let’s go back inside. It’s freezing out here.”

The silence between them in the elevator was heavy and made it difficult to mark the passage of time. All of Hanzo’s existence seemed to be centered on how Jesse was standing so close at his side that their arms were just at the edge of contact. He could hear Jesse breathing, smell the combination of cold air, cigar smoke, and the scent of cologne that was only noticeable when he was this close. And then, the moment passed, but Hanzo’s sense of intoxication persisted.

As they got their outerwear stowed once more, he said, “Thank you for removing your boots. I would not have asked you, as a guest, and someone who was not raised in my culture, but I appreciate that you have done so. I only wish I could offer you some slippers, but I have none that would be large enough.”

Jesse smiled as he made sure his hat was secure on its peg. “Ah, well I figured, you know, when in Rome? And if you don’t mind my sock feet, I don’t mind not having slippers. Not many folks visit with big feet like mine, eh?”

“Not many visitors with feet of any size. You may count yourself one of the privileged.”

“Say, where’s the facilities?” Jesse asked. “I need to, er, powder my nose.” Just because he’d lived as an outlaw, it didn’t mean he’d completely forgotten the manners his momma taught him. If there was a better time to use them than right now, he hadn’t thought of it yet.

Hanzo directed him to the correct door and then couldn’t help but smile at the thought of Jesse actually powdering his nose. While his companion was addressing the call of nature, Hanzo adjusted the lights and turned the holo-fire on to provide both flame display and heat. He thought about turning the radio on, but he didn’t want to look like he was trying too hard. He didn’t even know if Jesse was going to stay much longer, having accomplished what he was sent to do. So he stood by the hearth and waited, thinking of possibilities.

In that moment, Jesse stepped up behind him, placing his hand lightly in the center of Hanzo’s back. He could feel the muscle through the soft knit fabric of Hanzo’s shirt, and the heat of his body. Hanzo turned smoothly into the circle of Jesse’s tentative embrace, slipping one hand around Jesse’s waist to bring him closer, and sliding the other up to pull his head down for a kiss.

The sense of relief that Hanzo wanted him as much as he wanted Hanzo was almost as pleasurable to Jesse as the kiss. The resilient feel of Hanzo’s lips, the warm softness of his tongue, the gracefully athletic body pressed against his chest, combined with a clear expression of desire…it seemed like Jesse had been transported directly to heaven.

“Well now,” he said, a little shakily, when it was over. “I’m starting to think you might like me. Better be careful, or I might develop an oversized ego.” Even as he joked, giddiness was threatening to overtake him.

“You? Ego? Never.” Hanzo chuckled drily.

Jesse burst out in laughter then, a rich, hearty sound that filled the room. He squeezed Hanzo tightly, taking care not to cause any bruises with his prosthetic arm. “You are just what I need, sweetpea. I never thought I’d see the day.”

Hanzo buried himself in Jesse’s arms and reveled in the warmth. He’d abandoned any hope of finding joy in life long ago, yet here it was, flooding his body, reverberating through him like Jesse’s steady heartbeat. He didn’t ever want to let go, but…

“Jesse. Excuse me for just a moment. My nose, too, could use some attention. Please, make yourself at home. I will be right back.” Hanzo slipped out of Jesse’s embrace and made for the bathroom.

Jesse wandered over to the couch and sat down, stretching his arm out along the back. He hadn’t dared hope that this kind of connection could happen, so he had no plan, no idea what to do next. Right now, it felt like he was on top of the world, and he just knew he didn’t want to fall off.

Then, like a dream, Hanzo was next to him again, drawing him into another kiss. His hands found their way up Hanzo’s strong back to his shoulder blades, his natural right hand caressing the muscles that so easily sent arrows quivering through unsuspecting targets. He felt Hanzo’s fingers slip up the outside of his thigh to squeeze gently at his hip, then slide beneath him to cup the roundness of his bum. Jesse shivered at his touch, and let Hanzo arrange his body so they could lie together on the couch.

The kiss finished, leaving them to gaze searchingly into each other’s eyes. Hanzo had let his hair down, and Jesse couldn’t resist running his fingers through it, watching as the light picked out the silver threads that shot through the black silk. “I’ve never seen your hair down,” he said. “I like it.” He dragged his fingertips lightly across the fuzz of Hanzo’s undercut and down the back of his neck, smiling as Hanzo’s eyelids closed in pleasure.

“Jesse,” Hanzo said, when his eyes had opened again. “Can we do this, and work together?”

“If you’re asking if Overwatch will have a problem, I don’t think they have the standing to make an issue of it. We’re not an official military organization anymore, so there’s no governmental regs to abide by.” Jesse paused, stroking Hanzo’s hair again. “If you’re asking if we will have a problem, well, sugar, I just don’t know. I guess we have to take it as it comes.”

Hanzo sighed and let his elegant fingers play along Jesse’s jaw. “I suppose if I were to be compromised by strong emotion, I would already be finished.”

“Your brother?” Jesse asked softly.

Hanzo nodded slowly. “I can imagine no other situation as difficult as what passes between my brother and I, and yet I am still able to successfully accomplish mission goals.” He lifted his chin and barely touched his lips to Jesse’s. “We would do well to be cautious, however.”

“Careful’s the word. Got it.” Jesse smiled. “It’s gonna take a while for this to sink in, anyhow. Doesn’t seem quite real.”

“I assure you, Jesse McCree, I am very real.” The corner of Hanzo’s mouth turned up in a wry grin.

part 1 http://kinsale42-blog.tumblr.com/post/169254960082/invitations-part-1

part 2 http://kinsale42-blog.tumblr.com/post/169413810732/invitations-part-2

part 3 http://kinsale42-blog.tumblr.com/post/169667336517/invitations-part-3

#mchanzo #invitations #hanzo shimada #jesse mccree #overwatch #fanfic #slow burn #kissing!#still not done #maybe not as slow burn as the last three parts #they do keep all their clothes on though

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wailord · 7 years

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D.Va & Mercy: I am SO Bitter

They took my two mains and have made them both completely and utterly useless. I was hopeful when I heard about these changes, but now I am fuming. And it doesn’t seem like the devs are listening to anybody who shares my opinions. Despite being a console player, I HAVE played them both for a couple of hours on the PTR. I’m going to put my full points (I’m trying to be more rational than rant-y but I’m still incredibly bitter lol) under a cut, so that I don’t crowd people’s dashboards, but because of that, I’ll give a tl;dr right here. - D.Va has been nerfed so hard that she is in the same position now as Roadhog and doesn’t have a defined role in the game, nor will she be viable in upcoming seasons. - Mercy has been put into a spot where she can no longer fulfill her role adequately when compared to other supports or even characters with a blended role, making her worse even than Sombra, a DPS, and Orisa, a tank. Picking her is ultimately almost pointless. - OW is becoming a game catered solely to DPS characters, and protecting your team is a thing of the past. FEEL FREE to reblog, post your thoughts, message me privately, send me asks, etc. I don’t have many followers, but I encourage it.

I’ll start with D.Va. DM uptime reduced by 50% - Now, for every 10 seconds (plus a delay in recharge), I can protect my team for 2 seconds instead of 4. D.Va can no longer counter the brunt of any ult, nor can she successfully protect herself or her healers, which was something she excelled at. Without having her cooldown, critbox, or delay reduced, and without having her HP altered or increased, D.Va now becomes, like Hog, a walking ult battery for the other team. Her mech can be destroyed in quite literally a second if focused down and you will spend more time out of mech and dying than you will doing anything useful. Short of Zen’s Transcendence, if the enemy team is any good, you’re fucked. In addition, the only decent protection your backline healers had from Tracer and Genji have been removed. IN PAINFUL ADDITION, know who can protect from damage, ults, and even redirect them? Fucking Genji. And now he can do it better and longer than D.Va can. On a shorter cooldown!! That’s fucking right, folks. A DPS character is now better at protection than a goddamn tank. Let that sink in. Added Missile Attack that can be fired every 8 seconds. - D.Va ca now use a missile attack that deals a total of 200, no, 160 (lol they nerfed it too) damage in total, with very minimal splash. - These missiles can be shot while boosting. - These missiles can be shot while firing her regular cannons. Cool, missiles! Not really. Contrary to her cannons, these missiles are projectiles, and require good leading skills rather than the tracking skills her cannons require. Because of this, firing them together is clunky and awkward. You cannot lead and track at the same time. Because of how the missiles are fired (a few on each side in a line, rather than in a burst like Pharah’s ult), any player who is good at straffing can take potentially little to no damage. Firing them while boosting is risky; if you’re too close to the enemy D.Va damages herself, making her mech melt even faster. On the last patch, they actually nerfed her damage, solidifying her role as a protector tank. Why give her something clunky and potentially self-damaging when they could have just upped her regular damage and gotten rid of some of the fall-off? If they wanted to give her another ability, it should have been a utility - that way she wouldn’t have had to rely on DM so much (since apparently it’s a problem). Can now shoot while flying. This is self-explanatory. Despite having learned to use the fire button to cancel flight, this is actually a welcomed quality of life change. Of course, it doesn’t nearly make up for how hard they’ve killed her. Let’s move on to Mercy. I won’t put this in point form since it’s just a doozy. I’m more bitter about this than D.Va, surprisingly. Her rez has been moved to an ability on a 30 second cooldown, which averages more rezzes per game than having it as an ult. In THEORY, this is really cool. In THEORY, this will end the “hide and rez” Mercy tactic the DPS players whine about (isn’t backing off when you hear a teamwipe coming common sense???). However, it completely falls apart when you take a good hard look at her ult. Also her new rez voiceline really just sounds like she doesn’t even care. It’s watered down and uninspired. VALKYRIE, the name of the suit and the reason we’re all here. They have removed what made this character iconic, and given her a bit fat nothing in return. While ulting, for 20 seconds, Mercy can fly, shoot with infinite ammo (because they removed the firerate as it was too strong), move slightly faster, and her beams can chain amongst her team. In addition, her rez is reset, and cooldown while ulting is down from 30 seconds to 10. Yes this sounds super cool! But it’s not. Despite her beams chaining, they do not get buffed. Mercy still heals 60hp/second, and still damage boosts for 30%. If we’re comparing ults, Zen heals for 300hp/s over 6 seconds and is completely invulnerable. Orisa’s ult boosts all your nearby teammate’s damage by 50%. If we’re looking at numbers, Mercy can potentially heal 1200 hp over 20 seconds for each teammate. Zen, while invincible, heals 1800 hp over 6 seconds for each teammate. He can save his team from all high-damage ults that aren’t instakill (Junk and DVa, both of which are easily avoidable). Mercy, while ulting, cannot even outheal anything except a non-ulting Winston. She cannot protect her team from ults. Take 10 damage. A 50% boost puts it at 15, and a 30% boost puts it at 13. Orisa, over the period of her ult can boost 220 damage. Mercy, in 20s, can boost 260 damage. Only more because of the duration; more impact yeah, but over way more time. With the added firerate of her blaster removed, she no longer has the same DPS addition to her ult (which isn’t really her character’s purpose to begin with anyway so to me this is negligible). But KENDRA! Her rez resets and the cooldown is lowered! Yes, very true! However, what good will this do in a team wipe? You rez once, ult, then rez again. But then you gotta wait 10 seconds. By this time, the other dead souls have respawned and you and 2 teammates are standing there, acting as further ult charge for your enemies. But she can fly and escape! This becomes irrelevant when you have to literally be on top of the soul you want to rez (and you no longer have invincibility frames! This is true even without ult. Rezzing a teammate will literally get you killed unless no enemy is around). The restricted distance is a meager 5m. And despite being able to fly and having your regen be uninterruptable, you still only regen 20hp/s. While for Huge Rez you were invincible, during this ult, any 76, McCree, or Widow worth their salt will still demolish you, especially if the first two ult, making any impact you WERE going to have null and void. LITERALLY, taking all this into consideration, the only thing Mercy is good for anymore is healing outside of her ult and damage boost. And if you thought people yelled at you for not rezzing before, be prepared to be yelled at by every player you choose NOT to rez (or can’t rez because of the cooldown). This leads me to my conclusion; that Overwatch as a game is being changed to cater solely to DPS players. “It’s not fun to be oneshot by Hog.” Nerf. “It’s not fun to have my ult eaten by DM” Nerf. “It’s not fun to have my teamwipe reversed.” Nerf. It’s a disturbing trend that any type of character that can oppose and counter a DPS hero will get nerfed if enough people complain about things being not fun. However, Scatter Arow has yet to be nerfed (”he needs a way to defend himself!” so did D.Va). Symm’s melting capabilities have yet to be nerfed (”she wasn’t strong enough before in a fight!”). Pharah, Reaper, Soldier, McCree, and any ults in combination with Grav or Blizzard can all gain team wipes (”ults are meant to be gamechanging!” mercy’s no longer is tho). Someone on the forums worded it nicely: Overwatch is meant to be a Rock-Paper-Scissors game.You’re supposed to switch it up on the reg to counter your opponents. But because paper beats rock, rock complains and paper gets removed. Rock will now always beat Scissors, and so a new meta is born whether you like it or not, and you have everyone picking rock. This is how the game becomes stale. With D.Va’s new rework (cough, nerf), there is no longer any way to protect your healers from backline harrassers like Tracer, Genji, Pharah, or Reaper. Short of Zarya’s bubble (which only lasts a second under heavy damage), Rein staying back to beside the healer (ill-advised), or Winston’s dome (which can be walked into), anyone getting harrassed will be killed unless another DPS (or a charged Zarya) saves them by killing the enemy first. Hog can no longer punish harrassers completely, and the most Orisa can do is briefly mini-gravi them away (and that’s only if she isn’t paying attention to the frontlines, where she should be). Honestly at this point, the best protector is Mei, who can freeze and secure a kill (except against a really mobile Tracer or Genji, and except Pharah who’s in the sky), but then has to remain with the healers. Very rarely have I seen a DPS player who stays back and helps protect the healer (but yes I know you guys are out there). DVa can no longer counter (despite the amount of characters who can ignore her DM), and Mercy can no longer reverse the tides of battle. The majority of the roster is meant to secure kills. With the new deathmatch mode being introduced, and characters being reworked to fit a mold, I fear this will only increase. A diverse game that I loved is slowly being changed to accomodate esports and pro-players, and it’s incredibly disheartening.

#mercy #dva #overwatch #mercy ptr #dva ptr #overwatch ptr #dps crybabies #angela ziegler #hana song

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full-metal-furies · 7 years

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tag meme

ty for the tag @deredana!!!

RULES: Post the Rules. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger. Write 11 questions of your own. Tag 11 people. Spell your URL out in Kpop songs (ill be doing reg since i dont kpop much)

deredana’s questions:

1. Three things you always buy from the grocery store?

mackerel

calpico

honey butter chips if they have them

2. What’s in your bag/pockets right now?

i always carry a swiss knife, my keys and my phone with me at all times no matter where i go

3. What’s the latest game you’ve played?

Overwatch @__@ had to stop because of ping issues

4. Three things you’re good at?

being

bad

5. What class would you be in a fantasy RPG setting? (i.e. Mage, Cleric, Archer, that sorta thing)

ranger

6. Best thing that happened to you this week?

7. What’s your clothing style?

its either dad fashion, business casual or edgy neourban theres no in between

8. Favorite bird?

scissor tailed flycatches, any sort of hawk or falcon, and crows get notable mention because theyre such stupid cowardly mother fuckers i love em. blue herons, midwest cranes and double crested cormorants also get notable mention for best birds to birdwatch near home.

9. Any tips you learned lately and wanna share?

this isnt “lately” but “being social” can be learned. it wont change you from introverted to extroverted but in the instances that you do need to deal with people it helps to know how to act ~socially normal~ or whatever. practice in mirrors and imitate the way people talk and respond to certain comments. perfect the fake laugh. tldr learn how to act white to a passable degree.

10. Last thing that made you laugh?

m..emes?

11. What do you think is like… The Point?

its different for everyone.

not in a big mood to add new q’s or tag people so if you wanna do the above questions go for it

oh also the url thing (will tumblr let me embed a playlist)

youtube

if not heres just the url

#tag meme

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bai-xue · 7 years

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new rule: REGs, TERFs and SWERFs aren’t allowed to play overwatch anymore

#overwatch

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pornowatch · 7 years

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Valentine

Reyes finally gives in to McCree.

In Blackwatch they’re called deathgrams.

All operatives are kitted out with the standard GPS beacons, but some take it a step farther. Internal monitoring equipment is not required - it can show up on invasive scans, which can be difficult to explain during undercover work.

But for some soldiers, when their heart stops, they want it to be known. Death triggers a virtual intelligence to initiate any number of protocols, everything from warning brothers-in-arms against rushing into danger to recover a mere corpse to remotely deleting sensitive information from datapads. Sometimes agents with families use it to send goodbye letters to loved ones.

Four days after McCree fails to meet his check-in Gabriel gets an automated message in his personal inbox.

Hey Boss.

Feel weird writing this. Always figured that anyone lucky enough to get me would get you to, but in case your still kicking around then I wanted to say sorry. I aint a fortune teller so I got no way of guessing what does me in, but I know your probably pissed as hell about it. do me a favor and make sure the asshole who got me gets his, alright?

I aint gonna let this get to heavy. It wouldnt be fair to unload all that on you since you cant exactly answer back. Point is, you know how I felt. I never said it outright, but I’m not any more subtle than you are stupid. And since regs don’t much matter now, I just wanted to let you know that I love you. Always did, always will. I could tell you cared about me too, so dont fret about me going to my grave without knowing it.

I never had much religion in me, but if there is an after Ill keep a seat open up at the bar for you. Just dont rush to get here.

-M

Gabriel reads it twice over. He commits the message to memory, complete with McCree’s lack of understanding of basic punctuation principles. The words, he keeps with him. The meaning, he’ll deal with later. Someday.

He purges the message from Overwatch’s server, then gets back to coordinating the recovery mission.

“You’re a son of a bitch,” Reyes grumbles at McCree’s bedside just a couple days later.

The cowboy is unconscious, pallid, and missing an arm. He might lose a leg too, but Zeigler is hoping to save it. But McCree is stable, and though his future with Overwatch is up in the air, he will live.

Oh, he’ll live. He’ll live to pay for putting me through that, a wayward voice in Gabriel’s head huffs. He’s so emotionally exhausted that even the relief of Jesse’s survival hasn’t fully hit him yet. Happiness will come later, after sleep.

The drill sergeant in Gabriel who usually stomps out thoughts like that instead lays off this time.

Less than two months. That’s all the time it takes before McCree is up and walking on his own legs, barely acquainted with the artificial arm prototype but already begging to get back to work. He’s got some healing to do yet and then has to be evaluated, but it’s looking to Reyes like he’ll be fine to return to Blackwatch. Angela really is a miracle worker.

“Say,” McCree starts slowly, and Gabriel has been waiting all day for this. McCree’s been helping out with clerical duties in his office (not without complaint of boredom, but still). Recently the cowboy’s been hung up, trying to talk about something uncomfortable but afraid to spit it out. “While I was MIA, you didn’t happen to, uh, get any weird messages?”

Reyes plays it cool. “Weird messages?”

“Hell, I only ask ‘cause I had one of them chips that kicks on when it don’t detect no life signs. Thing is, chip was in my arm. So, well, I found out that when the arm got taken off, the VI went ahead and sent off some… premature e-mails.”

Reyes sets his datapad down. This conversation has been a long time coming, yet he still doesn’t know how he wants to answer. If McCree wants to stay in Blackwatch then Gabriel has to not have seen the man’s dying declaration. He could lie, say the message never got through, and they can continue maintaining the indefinite holding pattern of “don’t ask, don’t tell”. He’d be saving both their careers from going down thanks to gossip and scandal at best, fraternization charges at worst.

On the other hand, he’d nearly lost Jesse.

“What’s the date?” Gabriel feigns completing some paperwork. McCree will understand. After a short pause the subject is allowed to drop.

“It’s the fourteenth, Boss.”

He feels himself frowning. February fourteenth. Valentine’s Day.

Gabriel Reyes was not a man who put much stock in signs from the universe, but even he had to admit it was one hell of a coincidence. Especially since they’d found McCree, busted up but still breathing, on Christmas Eve.

“Can you believe we’re finally doin’ this?” Jesse asks in a hoarse whisper, eyes drifting blissfully closed while Gabriel kisses down the curve of his shoulder.

The commander chuckles against Jesse’s skin. He’d said finally. Not “actually” or “really”, but finally - like it was inevitable that they end up half-undressed and rubbing cocks like horny teenagers. And shit, maybe it was inevitable. In nine years while everyone else in his life had broken his trust, Jesse was the only one determined to be at Gabriel’s side. He was the only one Gabriel couldn’t afford to lose.

He rolls his hips, pinning Jesse down to the couch. Every repressed fantasy about bending McCree over his desk, all the nights spent with his hand down his sweatpants, thinking of his second’s pouting lips have nothing on the real thing. Gabriel meets Jesse’s upward bucking in time, and they’re both too damn hard to do anything but hang on for dear life.

“Say you’re mine,” Gabriel moans, throat dry and completely, utterly heedless of it.

“Yours, darlin’. You got me. Always did.”

He says it like a promise, and in their clumsy rutting Jesse pulls Gabriel to him. He seals it with a kiss that tastes like bitter cigar smoke.

For the first time in decades, Gabriel gives himself over to it.

#shotguns and six shooters #i love it when boys go frotting #it's just so nice #pornowrites #very little actual smut because today is a fluffy day #to all agents of overwatch

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