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#relationship we have with him like. idk mostly just letting him get away with things like this that anyone else would have their ass on
luizd3ad · 2 days
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When in Doubt, Blame Damian | Jason x Reader One shot
ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ࣪˖⤷ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ࣪ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ˖ ⤷
Pairing: Jason Todd x GN! Reader
WC: 928
TW: Swearing, over thinking. It’s mostly kinda fluffy. No use of Y/N.
Author's Note: I got this idea while giving my dog a bath sooo here you go idk lol hope you like it🖤
Summary: You get a dog!! … but you didn’t tell Jason.
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Not my picture
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You blamed Damian.
You normally blame Damian for a lot. More than you're willing to admit, sometimes for stuff he wasn't even involved in.
But this time you think it's actually his fault.
How could you not blame him? If he hadn't asked for a ride to the pet store. If he didn't insist that Titus absolutely needed a new friend. If he never put that little puppy in your arms basically forcing you to fall in love with the little baby that was giving you kisses, then you wouldn't be here right now.
You wouldn't be in yours and your boyfriend's apartment trying to figure out how to tell said boyfriend that you guys now had a dog. 
Would Jason be mad? Honestly? You didn't know. The topic of getting a dog or a cat has came up a few times.
He would usually say things like ‘Maybe’ or ‘Now's just probably not a good time’ it was never a definite yes or no.
So maybe it wouldn't be that bad, you thought to yourself trying to give yourself some confidence. 
I mean it was your apartment too. You contributed. And it would feel nice to have something to keep you company while Jason was on patrol or had to go somewhere for a while.
You'd hyped yourself up at this point you had some good arguments lined up for why it was a good idea.
You felt confident about your choice, especially when you looked down at the little puppy sleeping peacefully in his bed that was in your shared bedroom. You got this, you told yourself and you really believed that. You genuinely did.
That was until you heard the front door unlock. 
You rush out the room, closing the door softly trying not to wake up the puppy. 
You walked into the living room to greet Jason who was out all morning and most of the afternoon training with Dick, Cass and Duke. 
“Hey Jay.” You say giving him a soft kiss.
“Hi my love. How was your day?”
Jason says, giving you a tight hug, holding you for a moment. 
“Umm it was you know. It was fine. Hung out with Dames. Nothing crazy you know? How about you?”
You rambled pulling away from Jason trying not to sound suspicious while walking to the couch in the living room. 
Jason gives you a questioning look but ends up just dropping it and following you to the couch.
“It was fine. Just the normal shit. I missed you though.”
Jay pulls you into him while giving you a kiss on your head. You feel kinda guilty at this point.
You don't like keeping things from Jason. He has a lot of trust issues so it was important that you guys had a lot of honesty and communication in your relationship. 
You pull away from Jason and look at him, giving him a slightly guilty look.
“Jay, I have something to tell you. Don't be mad.”
“Did something happen when you were out with the Demon Spawn? Did he do something? What did he say? I'm gonna kick that little brats ass.”
Jason runs his hand through his hair already mad at Damian for whatever Jason thinks he did. 
“Jay calm down Dames didn't technically do anything. I did something, and before you get mad-”
You were interrupted when you heard a puppy bark and a slight clawing sound at the bedroom door and judging by Jasons face he also heard it. 
“What was that?”
“What was what?”
You give a little chuckle, now trying to play it off. Hoping that this isn't how Jason finds out but knowing that it is. 
“Babe Is there a dog here?”
“Um technically..? Yes?”
Jason sighs and gets up to the bedroom and opens the door letting the dog run up to you as he tries to climb up on you. You pick him up, putting him on your lap while he starts playing with your hand. 
“Babe, who’s dog is that?”
“Umm… Ours?”
“When did we get a dog?”
Jason says wide eyed and raises his eyebrows at you.
“It's all Damian's fault! He told me how lonely Titus gets sometimes and I felt bad and just look at how cute he is!”
You try to explain picking the dog up so Jason can look at him.
 “Don't be mad jay..”
You say putting the puppy on the floor so he can run around a little all while you look extremely guilty.
“Mad? Why would I be mad? Wait baby, is this what you were trying to tell me?”
Jason says sitting next to you on the couch while looking at you concerned. 
“Yes… I felt bad making a choice like that without you and I know how you don't like it when people hide stuff from you and I just don't want to make you mad.”
“Baby, I'm not mad. I'm not thrilled that you got a dog without me, especially because it was with the Demon Spawn. But I'm not mad.”
Jason says pulling you into him kissing the top of your head.
“You're not mad? Really?”
“I can't be mad at you baby. You mean everything to me.”
Jason says while the puppy runs up to you guys laying down at your feet.
“I'm still sorry Jay.”
“I know you are, baby. It's okay, promise. Now what's this little guy's name?”
Jason says picking up the puppy and looking at his face while you smile at them.
Maybe you shouldn't blame Damian… this time.
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xiao-come-home · 23 days
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Boothill relationship headcanons;
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✰ Characters: Boothill x reader.
✰ Words: ~1k.
✰ SFW+N//SFW ; SFW mentions no pronouns or gender of the reader. N//SFW section was written with fem!reader in mind.
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Warnings: THIS HAS A NSFW PART. MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS skip this section if possible. some of these hc are based on this post, since i wanted to write a little more about it.
A/N: BRAINROT gRR he truly gives me doctor by Miley Cyrus vibes. idk how to explain it but take it
┗━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━┛
Boothill:
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SFW
he's such a gentleman! opens doors for you, pulls out a chair, kisses your hand when he sees you first for the day, it doesn't get boring for him at all. if you ignore some of his unhinged behaviors, then he's a perfect man.
like i mentioned in my previous post, he's VERY possessive of you. he does like to go to unknown clubs or bars with you to try out their best drinks in his spare time, though he doesn't have you attached to his hip (even.. if he wouldn't probably mind at all), he does keep a sharp eye on you. if a weird guy approaches you and you're clearly uncomfortable, he tries to intimidate the guy away and clearly let him see that you're his (aka placing his arm around your waist and pushing you into him), if being polite doesn't work, well, they have a rough night. not in a good way.
this man SCREAMS BACK HUGS!! since his body is like 90% metal and machines, he loves to embrace you from behind and wrap his arms around your tummy, while his chin rests on your shoulder. he misses the softness of his own skin, so having you gives him a lot of comfort; the warmth you're radiating makes him reluctant to ever pull away. boothill often finds himself touching his cheeks with his robotic arms, when they get warm enough - the feeling almost long forgotten in his mind.
speaking of back hugs: he's also very big on neck kisses, mostly giving than receiving, depending on how he feels, they're either very innocent and loving - very soft, paired with butterfly kisses, or biting you and then kissing it better, when things get steamy.
boothil finds it funny when his hair tickles you when he hugs you from behind. if he's feeling particularly like a little shit that day, he can annoy you the entire day like that, only to respond with "hmm? what do you mean? I'm not doing anything, baby!" ...don't tell him his smirk gives it away, but honestly, at this point, he probably doesn't try to hide it that well.
he DOES slap your ass when you go past him. EVERY time. it doesn't get boring for him, he likes the sound it makes AND how soft it is, bonus if it jiggles, then he's even more proud. he might offer "an apologetic massage," which you rarely agree to (but he'll try until u say yes).
if someone ever tinkers with his Synesthesia beacon, he cannot swear for his life. you might catch him trying to cook, spilling something, and then hearing loud "YOU LITTLE DAISY FLOWER! CUTIE PIE! CURSED FROG!" it's kinda impressive how colorful they can get...
speaking of his voice, he's probably able to manipulate it so it sounds the best according to your taste. although his flesh heart has been gone for so long, he still feels that familiar, warm feeling and squeeze of his own, mechanical one, when your answer is always the same - to modulate it so it sounds the closest to what it used to be, or that the current one is just as pleasant to hear.
he likes to kiss you. no matter where, or when. if he wants to, he'll get one, pressing you against him, cupping your face with one hand, and kissing your puckered lips. once you give in, he kisses you properly, caressing your cheek ever so slightly to ease any discomfort left, only to hold you tightly on your hips and whimper on purpose just to tease you more (i believe in boothill is a little shit theory).
if we assume his face is the only human part of him left (besides his eyes). In that case, he just truly loves the softness of your lips on his. he kisses you as much as he can, and will get all fussy and whiny if he doesn't get his good morning kiss, we-see-each-other-for-the-first-time-today kiss (note: this is not the same as good morning kiss), goodnight kiss and so on. yes, he could get it by himself, but he wants it from you first. he's just very stubborn.
watch out! he likes to draw blood on your lower lip when his intrusive thoughts win. he licks the blood off later, and gives it a loving kiss.
his hair is genuine, so he loves whenever you play with it, brush it, or take care of it in general. it's probably one of the very few human features of his, so if your boothill lets you carefully pamper it, let alone without flooding his cords, he's not only very impressed, but also very willing to indulge in more sessions.
finds it absolutely adorable when you wear his hat when he isn't looking. or, well, when you think he isn't looking.
N/SFW. minors and ageless blogs shoo!
the council has decided that he has a vibrator in place of his real junk. but if you're into experimenting and want him to feel a bit more, hm, natural - he's more than happy to change his parts. shape, size and pace - everything for his lady.
you can probably guess, but that's an absolute ass man. he sees you in tighter pants that hug you just so nicely and might go feral.
eats pussy like a starved man. he has no shame and licks, sucks, and fucks you with his tongue and THE SOUNDS could put the devil himself to shame. boothill always wants everyone to know that you're his, how you scream and moan for him, so in return - he never lets a drop of your juices go to waste, slurping and moaning into your slit.
he's literally so flexible, that he'll fuck you in every position you want him to. if it means he'll get deeper, he's on board. and probably on top of you too.
likes to grope you through your clothes. sounds very tame, but it really gets him going, and might sometimes cause trouble in public.. unless you WANT that trouble.
adding to the headcanon above - he truly just gets turned on by your skin, especially imperfections. stretch marks? he'll kiss them all, scars? he has them all memorized. when he touches you through your clothes, he already remembers what is where, it's like he's edging himself knowing that soon enough he'll undress you completely and see it clearly; he quite literally worships what truly makes you... you.
he. is. so. SO over when you pull on his hair. when you make out, when he fucks you - doesn't matter. DO IT and he'll go absolutely crazy, hissing in pleasure and grinding into you.
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stsgooo · 2 months
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moonlit goddess.... maybe jinshi is wondering why his dear maid continues to pull away from him... and maybe gao shun lets it slip that "they shouldn't have been close that day anyway".... and jinshi pesters him until he folds n explains.... IDK I JUST WANT A HAPPY ENDING FOR THOSE TWO :((((( (not forced ofc!! i jus love ur writing!)
Bridge the Gap.
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✩࿐ summary: life and death really makes a girl wonder.
warning(s): idiots in love, chapters 61-65 manga spoilers, master/servant like relationship, description of near drowning, suggestive content, ambiguous ending. wc; 9.3k
pairing(s): jinshi/fem!reader.
a/n: tysm for reading my fics means the world to hear ppl actually enjoy them, anon!!! ;') i wasn't really going to make a 2nd part of moonlight goddess as i thought it was okay to leave off there, but i love jinshi sooo i'll take any excuse to write him. this was initially going to be a part 2 of clumsiness, but i figured my plans worked better with what you were envisioning! im not entirely sure how to feel about this, but i hope this lives up to the standards! i apologize for any mistakes, this was written mostly in the early mornings when i had time!
part i. m.list
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"Are you sure I'm not hurting you?"
"Y/N, please, stop asking me that."
"Oh, yes. My apologies, Jinshi-sama. Sorry."
This were, admittedly, not going well. Both of you soaked, hair dripping, and standing in the cave behind a rapid waterfall, and a dull ache in your chest as you recovered. Partly your fault, partly the fault of some crazed marksman that was hiding in the forest, trying to slaughter Jinshi and, by proxy, you.
To understand how you two ended up in this situation, we would have to back up a bit.
"Oh? Y/N, I didn't know you'd be attending this as well?"
"It was a last minute switch with Suiren and I."
"You... enjoy these hunts?"
"I've done everything I could to avoid them in the years past."
Your lack of excitement was apparent and clear. It appeared to bring no ease of mind to Maomao who dragged her rather disgusted eyes from you towards Gaoshun. The older man just kept his attention on the moving scenery outside, a distant glaze over his eyes.
Maomao obviously wasn't optimistic. Just like you. You were almost proud that she had caught on so easily.
The sweltering heat outside seemed to seep into the carriage, cooking you alive in your rather formal wear. Something that you were spotted in far and few, having been years that you truly cleaned yourself prim and proper. You had been on the edge of declining even going when Jinshi, with a grin and a certain glitter in his eyes, had too happily informed you that it was a direct invitation from Shishou.
Your fate had been sealed.
Maomao peeked at you from the corner of her eye, head tilted, "Do you mind me asking why you avoided these events?"
You don't even spare her a glance, "I fear if I spoke my honest opinion, I'd stain Jinshi-sama's reputable name with my foul mouth." You reply flatly in return.
"Please don't." Gaoshun said softly from his seat, looking particularly tired.
You decided to ignore the slump of Maomao's shoulders as if disappointed by the swift interruption and decline on Gaoshun's part. Turning your eyes towards the shifting world outside.
It'd been exactly five months since Jinshi had danced under the moon and you came to the conclusion that any impure thoughts you held for your master would be safely tucked away in the back of your mind (and heart). Forever your secret. Only to be heard in your dreams and upon your death, when you repent for any ill thoughts to the Great Man above.
Everything had returned to its normal routine. You would get up in the morning, prepare breakfast alongside Suiren, eat, then proceed with any chores the woman gave you for the rest of the day, then repeat. Equally, your relationship (or lack thereof) with Jinshi had remained the same. Conversations filled with pleasantries. Simple things that had always lingered between the two of you since you were children. Pleasant and simple. As the world shall ever be.
It got a bit ruffled with Jinshi had cornered you and practically ordered that you come to the hunt instead of Suiren.
In the middle of scrubbing away at the floors, he had found you. Stood above you with that grin, “Y/N, you’re one of my most loyal servants, hm?” He’d begun with an inflection in his tone that made you horribly hesitant.
You had faltered in your scrubbing to stare up at him with confusion, “Uh…well, I suppose, Jinshi-sam’s.”
“Why don’t you join me for the Hunt this up coming week?”
Your had heart dropped. And, by the look Gaoshun had dawned, his had too. The Hunt, in your humble opinion, was a glorified weekend for the men in high positions to rub one off while killing animals. It wasn’t something you found interesting in or much grace. That’s why you had declined Suiren’s question on whether or not you’d like to take her place only three days prior. You had no interest in watching anyone, even Jinshi, size each other up while a defenseless animal bled.
“Jinshi-sama, I believe Suiren—“
Ever the gentleman, he had cut you off, “No worries, Suiren agreed to take over matters while you’re gone! She’s the sweetest, right?” He had appeared all to eager and all too himself for you to ignore.
So, with a heavy heart, you’d sighed, accepting defeat and his invitation.
Now, you would find your torture for a multiple day retreat with a bunch of men with their c—
The carriage came to an abrupt halt, bringing an unruly end to your thoughts as you all carefully exited and were greeted by the sunshine. The humid air heavy with the condensation of the area and already making a sweat appear on your brow. But, ever the lady, you pleasantly tuck your hands into your sleeves and follow behind Gaoshun and Basen.
You were a little surprised as Maomao stuck closely to your side; but not all too surprised to find her attention on your surroundings, vague surprise in her eyes. The area was as equally as beautiful as it was a burden to you.
The buildings weren't anything for you to revel at. Spending an entire lifetime within palaces and in buildings as equally or above standard to those, it just wasn't anything special. The nature surrounding the area, however, was something to stare in awe at. Lucious trees, beautiful grass, and beautiful array of plants and flowers. It almost made you regret all the time you had spent away from this place.
But it wasn't like you had the chance to truly return since the last time you were here. Nothing could bring back that little girl.
You deterred your thoughts away as Gaoshun slid the door open. Immediately, you were hit with a wave of heat that you made you tense up. It was apparent that you wouldn't find your much needed cool down you were desperate to find since you were confined in the carriage days prior.
You were the last to enter and when you did, you faltered at the sight before you.
Jinshi was sprawled across the couch, wisps of his dark hair framed his sweat glistened face, eyes closed in contempt. A small dent appeared between his eyebrows and a frown adorned his face. However, your attention was caught on a drop of sweat that made its way from his hairline, down his cheek, his jaw, his long slender neck, and past his— his collar.
His modesty was of no worry, apparently, as he laid with his robes parted open to reveal his chest. Itself was glistening with sweat. Delicate skin on showcase for all to see. It brought a soft blush to your cheeks, as you blatantly ogled him. Pressing your lips together to contain whatever thoughts you had about him from burst from your seams.
"Y/N," Jinshi's voice hit your ears, tender and smooth. You're suddenly hyperaware that he's staring at you with raised brows, lids peeked open to stare at you.
You straighten your back and offer a bow, "Jinshi-sama. Do you require anything?" You had to get it together. It was inappropriate to behave in such a scandalous way. "Request for ice? Tea?"
Jinshi shook his head, sitting up, "No, rather I'd like for you to rest after such a long journey."
You falter, your arms wavering from their position in front of your face, "Uh.... Wouldn't the room be more tolerable with some ice?" You spare a glance around the room and grimace. The windows are shut tight, only bits of sun peeking through the cracks. Basen looks rather miserable, but trying to appear his usual stern self. While Gaoshun and Maomao seem rather okay with showcasing their small discontent with the heat. A nice cube would help at least cool down a bit.
You also couldn't stand another second seeing Jinshi like that. As if he were some type of nymph testing your faith.
"Really, it's fine—" Jinshi attempted, but you were already turning on your heel.
"I will return with ice." You didn't miss the way Jinshi's face fell and his eyes cut to Gaoshun who shook his head in return.
Your fast paced adventure led you to the main hall, where people were moving in and out. Various officers and servants filled the area, finding their rooms or helping their masters and fellow officers to their own rooms. Everyone appeared to be feeling the heat as they wiped their brows. Much like you, they appeared to be attempting to defeat the heat.
You found your way towards an attendant who helped you get something situated for Kousen. Something that brought you both distaste and irritation. Something to be addressed at a later time.
Joy filled you as you turned around, ice would soon be in the room and you could crowd around it like it was a new lover.
As you were about to make your way back to the room, you ran into someone.
You were about to apologize when they whirled around and you let out an audibly sigh that conveyed your unwavering exhaustion for them.
"Hey, watch where— Oh, hey, " Lihaku blinked, kind face twisted up in vague recognition. “You’re that lady-in-waiting. What are you doing out here?”
“I’m on loan from Jinshi-sama,” you answered rather flatly, not missing the small frown accompanying the man’s face.
You were vaguely familiar with Lihaku. What with Maomao getting involved in the problems within the inner and rear palace, you were bound to make new acquaintances when she was dragging you around. Lihaku was the first one you had ran into. On orders to accompany the girl from Suiren, you had gotten to see her investigative skills firsthand. You were impressed, surely, when she had made the discovery about the potatoes. But the impression was overshadowed by Lihaku, who had spent the entire time chatting your ear off.
He was kind, handsome, and smart when it called for it. But you could tell that, like most officers, he had an airheaded vibe to him. One that deterred you from making things too complicated with him.
Friendly enough, and one of the few people that didn't seem to disinterest Maomao, you accepted his very vague and shadowed feature in your life.
"Well, that's nice of him." He said, clearly disinterested in where this conversation was going. "I'm glad to see a friendly face, though."
You offered a small smile, "As am I. Not many kind faces around here often."
"You can say that again." You hear a loud inhuman snort and a tug on your gown, taking a large step back, you look down. A large dog with drool leaking out from the sides of its mouth stared back at you. "Oh, hey, boy, no!"
"O-Oh my." You uttered, slightly breathless as you looked at the large beast.
Lihaku glanced at you, offering a withering smile, "Eh, sorry, he gets excited around new people— not a great trait in a dog like this, you would think, but he's a real gem. Just has his moments. Hey, now—"
Lihaku pulled out something metal and brought it to his lips, then blew. It emitted little to no sound, at least, any you could truly hear, making your perk up when the dog tilted his head and sat respectfully before the officer. He blew again and the dog laid. Again, and the dog stood on all fours.
You smiled softly, watching in wonder as it obeyed whatever silent orders it was getting from Lihaku.
"He's very smart." You observed as the dog sat down again.
"Right?" Lihaku beamed, "I can get him to come running from kilometers away if need be."
"Useful when you're in a bind."
"For sure!" Lihaku's demeanor reminded you of a proud father as he puffed his chest and looked distastefully towards the cages lined up outside. "He's real smart, yet they still want to use those birds in the end."
You didn't want to point out the various problems that could come with using a dog; as there were probably another list of various pros to actually use the dog. The hawks had been used for years and you doubt that some dogs would be taking their place any time soon. It'd probably be a long time before these arrogant men came to their senses and found better means. Despite dogs being loyal and determined to their cause, the hawk would always be chosen.
Or, the better alternative, they didn't do this hunt anymore.
But you knew that was a longshot.
It wasn't long after that you bid Lihaku a farewell and good luck on his duties, making your way back to the room. You exchanged pleasant smiles and greetings with familiar faces, but nothing that kept you from relaxing much longer.
When you returned to the room, everyone had found their own areas and activities to occupy themselves. Gaoshun and Basen were playing Go near the windows, Maomao was reclining on the floor where a sliver or air was flowing through (from where, you weren't completely sure). Jinshi was back to sitting on the couch, a book in his hands. Something that was quickly disregarded as you gently closed the door behind you.
"The ice should be up soon." You informed the room with a respectful bow.
Jinshi didn't look at all interested, "What took you so long?" It sounded like contempt. Irritation if you had to really dig. Something that made you falter.
You look up and see the pout on his lips— childish, as always. "Oh, I'm sorry, Jinshi-sama. I happened to run into a friend and got caught up in conversation." You apologized softly. The last thing you wanted to do was bring him more annoyance and disturbance.
He straightened considerably, "A friend?"
You didn't like the way it was spoken. A touch of disbelief was enough for you to eye him with your own distaste. Even if you and Lihaku were nothing more than strangers with vague familiarity with one another.
"Yes, a friend." You confirmed with thin lips. Despite your inner voice telling you to reign in your attitude, you upturn your nose and decide to join Maomao— whose eyes were shooting between the both of you with trepidation and vague sympathy. "He was being kind."
Jinshi huffed, "I didn't know you had any secret friends."
"Not a secret. Just don't find any time to speak about it with you, Jinshi-sama."
That made the man falter, a darkened shadow over his face. "I suppose." He frowned heavily now, squinting at you with something unreadable. "Who is this friend of yours?"
You, finding no reason to lie, continued on, "Officer Lihaku."
In an instant, three heads snapped to you with varying degrees of emotions. Maomao looked shocked, but welcomed the information with a shrug. Gaoshun looked pale and overwrought, for whatever reason you weren't entirely sure, but you had an itching feeling it had to do with Jinshi.
The same Jinshi that was now face down on the couch, letting out a miserable sound. Speaking into the fabric of it all, unintelligiable. But you swore you heard something along the lines of— "that second rate, again?!" As he continued to rant and cry.
With that, you decided it best to not involve yourself with whatever Jinshi was battling. You wouldn't win anyway.
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You'd always hated Kousen-sama.
He almost always seemed to loom in the shadows. An masked man who held no personality or words of his own. Pleasantries offered out of necessity and not because that was simply the right thing to do. He was mysterious. He hardly appeared, but he was always there. A reminder for what things would return to one odd day. A symbol for exactly where your loyalties and master lied.
Kousen-sama was to always appear before others with his mask on. To avoid them seeing the ghastly sight of scars and blemishes that adorned his skin because of his sickness (whatever that may be) and spare him the indecency of stares. He was unmoving. Stone amongst he lively environment that ate away at their lunches and softly conversed with one another.
Prince. The respectable Kousen-sama. The great son of the empire. The brave prince against all odds.
Oh, how much you hate Kousen-sama.
But you still had woken up early to help him pin his hair back. To slip his robes on. To delicately place the mask on, fingering the bangs out through the slits to allow some type of familiarity. You were his confidant. His reliable and kind servant.
As always, you and Basen stood behind Kousen-sama with your backs straight and eyes ahead. A pleasant servant on loan and stern guard, you both were familiar faces against the unrecognizable figure in front of you. It reminded the people exactly who was before them. Exactly who had decided to grace their presence.
Still, it brought you discomfort.
You still eyed Gaoshun in the corner of you eye. The older man sat at the other end of the table. Maomao standing behind him with a distant look in her eyes, obviously not paying attention to the things happening around her. Not entirely surprising, but you felt the overwhelming urge to scold her for her lack in etiquette.
Oh, you're starting to think like Suiren, aren't you?
Suddenly, Basen is tensing up beside you and Kousen-sama is turning his head away from a scowling Shishou. Your eyes snap between the two with a scowl of your own. Whatever that man had said—
Kousen-sama's hand clenches. So tightly that his knuckles turn white and he shakes. You know something isn't right. You had missed something. Something so obvious and you were too concerned about Gaoshun.
The man stands from his chair, the legs loudly clattering against the tiled and stone floor. You watch uneasily as Kousen-sama raises, takes a moment to collect himself, then practically speeds away from the room. You don't waste a moment to bring your sleeve covered hands to your mouth and make your own exit.
As you pass a concerned Maomao and Gaoshun, you hear a barely uttered whisper from the girl— heat. Food.
You try to hide your confusion and worry as you follow behind your master.
It doesn't take you long to find him.
Down the path, up against a tree, the masked figure was hunched and obviously breathing heavily. You draw closer, outstretching a hand to gently press it against the large expanse of his back.
"Kousen-sama, are you quite alright?" You ask softly, hunching slightly to capture a glimpse of his eyes from that slit in the fabric.
When you do, you're almost breathless. His violet eyes are alight with something distant and scornful. Eyebrows furrowed as he meets your own gaze.
"Y/N...?" He sounded vaguely surprised under it all, breathless himself. As if he couldn't quite believe that you were here in front of him.
You nod once, reaching out and grabbing ahold of one of the ties keeping the mask all together. "I'm going to remove this. No one is around."
His hand is suddenly wrapped around your wrist. Not tight or unrelenting, but enough to make you freeze. Warm and clammy skin against your own to make you feel scorched. You don't need to see his entire face to know that his jaw was clenched now.
"I can't," he said in all his self-assuredness, "Someone might still come."
What a pain. You thought to yourself as you draw in a heavy breath.
You don't waste a second to slip under his arm, wrapping it around your shoulders and allowing him to lean most of his weight against you. "No worries, sir, I'll just find us some place where no one else is around."
You gently guide Kousen-sama from the line of trees and deep within it. Finding an oddly familiar path created within your mind to follow that takes you towards an overflowing waterfall. A loud crash of water hitting the rocks and body of water below that brought you a distant sense of comfort. The refreshing smell of the water hits your nostrils and you take a deep breath.
With Kousen-sama against you, you felt the sweltering heat hit you tenfold. But the mist from the waterfall brushed against your skin like a gently caress from an old lover.
This is it.
You stumble over to one of the few trees next to the waterfall and gently guide Kousen-sama to sit up against it. The man took a heavy breath and you finally felt a little at ease. Reaching forward, you moved to take the cloth off once again and then—
A loud thud and chunks of dirt hit your cheek.
You frowned, looking to the ground only a could feet away and saw a small crater. A sharp smell filled your senses and you stiffened. It was an unkind and almost putrid scent. The smoke from the small crater was the main cause.
"Eh—?"
You were suddenly cut off as Kousen-sama wrapped his arms around you, jerking you upwards and away from the tree. You would've basked in the way his body was pressed against your back or the way his fingers seemed to mold into your abdomen— you would've if it weren't for the loud crack in the air then the pieces of bark that flew through the air around you.
The tree that he had been pressed up against only moments ago was now split open with a piece of metal imbedded into the wood. It looked eerily similar to the same that had been in the ground moments ago.
"Is that a feifa?!" His voice pierced through your thoughts, oddly frantic and uneasy as he moved quickly from the tree and towards the river.
You glanced up at him and found him already staring down at you. Eyes narrowed and, if it weren't for the mask, his entire face would be scrunched up in that familiar distaste and panic. Yet he seemed eerily calm as he dragged you through the trees and into the water.
"Sorry, but this is gonna get a bit dramatic." His voice was soft against your head, warm breath caressing your hair as he wraps a protective arm around your head.
Your eyebrows raise, "Dramatic— WHAT?" You should've known his tone and choice of his words were a warning for what was to come, but you were still caught off guard.
He gave no indication that he was going to jump off the cliff.
"Jinshi, you goddamn idiot!"
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You mustn't get ideas above your station.
The water was oddly clear. Even with the mix of the overflowing waterfall, under it all was peaceful and calm. Fishes and water like insects lived in harmony.
Cool and calm. Always.
You are there to serve your master.
The little boy's head burst from the water with a big grin, short hair flat against his head and dripping. The sun reflecting off his violet eyes and almost blinded the little girl curled up on the side shore. Her face set into a scowl, clothes drenched, and a looming unimpressed older man behind her.
"It's so nice out, why don't you come in!" Beckoned the boy from the water.
The little girl shot him a nasty look, "You know why, you jerk!"
The boy's grin faltered, tilting his head at his friend, "Eh? Why are you being mean?" His voice wavered on the ends, still just floating in the middle of the basin.
"I'm not mean! You're mean! You're the biggest meanie!" The little girl stood up to throw an accusatory finger at the boy, her sleeve heavy and uncomfortable as she moved.
The boy's face reddened, eyebrows scrunched together, "I'm not mean! You're mean!" He repeated.
"No, you are! You're the biggest meanie in the whole wide world!"
"No, you are!"
"You are! You pushed me into the water!"
"You are! You should swim!"
"I hope you drown, meanie!"
The boy's expression fell completely. A heartbroken glint in his eyes flooding them. His lips trembled. But, before he could do something like cry, he was already swimming deeper
Nothing less, nothing more.
"Now, now," a large hand rested on the little girl's shoulder and gently tugged her back, turning her around to face the man. He seemed to be trying to appear as tender as he could to try calm down the girl's high nerves. "No need to get angry."
"But, Gaoshun—" The little girl whined.
Gaoshun shook his head, patting her shoulder, "No, we don't argue. Try to forgive and forget, yeah?" He reminded the lessons that he'd attempted multiple times to teach the two children. "No reason to walk around with resentment for others, right?"
The little girl scoffed her shoe against the ground, a pout on her lips, "Do I have to, Gaoshun?" She knew what this would call for. Exactly how this would end for her.
The man heaved a sigh, nodding, "Yes, you do. Now, go reconcile. I'll wait here."
The girl faltered as the man raised to his full height, cupping his hands behind his back. She dragged her feet through the soft soil and found her way towards the boy once more. He was grasping onto the edge of the bank, sniffling and snorting. His shoulders shook and his face was stuffed into his arms.
The little girl frowned. "Um... Are you okay?"
The boy stiffened, not turning around as he answered, "No."
"I'm sorry, I said something real mean." The little girl uttered, stepping closer as she clutched her wet clothes. "I just... You pushed me into the water, I can't..."
"I thought you were my friend!" The little boy whirled around on her, face red and eyes filled with big tears. He looked enraged but incredibly disheartened. The girl blinks in return as the boy glares. "You say such mean things to me. Friends aren't supposed to be mean!"
The girl clenched her jaw, "You were mean to me first!" She accused.
The boy sniffled, wiping under his nose with his forearm. "You're my friend." He repeated as if that cleared up any anger.
Nothing more, nothing less.
The little girl slowly sat beside him, her feet dipping under the water. "It is nice." She whispered.
The little boy dragged his eyes upwards, looking hurt but hopeful. "Right?" he asked, equally as quiet.
"You're my friend too, Jinshi." The little girl nudge him with her leg.
Jinshi's eyes twinkled, wide and all too bright, "Really?"
"Really." The little girl confirmed with a toothless grin. "My friend forever and ever!"
Jinshi positively beamed, the water sloshing as he jumped happily. "Forever and ever, and ever!"
"And ever!"
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"It's no longer... appropriate for you and Jinshi-sama to be friends."
"I don't... I don't understand. He's my friend."
"His mother no longer finds it appropriate for you to concern yourself with Jinshi."
"But, Gaoshun—"
"No, Y/N. It's over. Come along. Suiren has a present for you."
"He's.... He's my friend...."
"I'm so sorry."
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You are to give your life to your master.
The woman paused, back pin straight, as she entered her master's office, finding him curled up in the corner, muttering nonsensically to himself. The guard of said master was watching on with a pitiful expression of his own, only breaking his eyes away when the woman entered the room. His expression only seemed to deepen.
She didn't need to ask. There was an unspoken understanding as to what their master's breakdown was regarding. The Apothecary. The one that had gotten the attention of everyone in the palace as of late. The one that had been causing her great grief as of late— and was about to create more.
"Jinshi-sama?" The woman called softly, stepping closer.
Jinshi's lifeless eyes continued to stare at the floor below him. A gentle rocking seeming to soothe himself from the rages of his mind. "I don't need anything, Y/N. Thank you, kindly." He uttered just as lifelessly.
The devoted servant's chest clenched. Her face flushed as she reached out a wavering hand. To place it delicately against his hunched back. To offer her best comforting words that she could. To distract him away from her.
Any inappropriate behavior will be punished, severely.
She faltered. This wasn't her place. This wasn't a part of her duties unless Jinshi said so. Inappropriate behavior wasn't called for. It will be punished severly.
Retracting her hand, she stands, and offers a respectful bow. "Please call me if you need anything, Jinshi-sama." And left him in his dark corner.
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"Gaoshun, may I ask you something?"
"Of course, Jinshi-sama."
"You have been in my life for as long as I can remember. You remember more than I possibly could about my younger years. Whatever happened to cause me and Y/N to fall apart?"
"...."
"It had to be around the time I was eight that I noticed we were growing apart. Even now, I see it so clearly."
"It's been a long time, Jinshi-sama. You're no longer children."
"All the more reason to know, isn't it?"
"I don't know...."
"Gaoshun, nothing will come of it. I'm simply curious."
"..."
"I'm sorry to put you in this position. Please return to what you were doing."
"Jinshi-sama.... you might not like the truth..."
"I usually don't."
"Where to begin.... Before her eighth birthday—"
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"H....E—"
Everything felt so muffled. Faraway. Featherlight.
Was that a pressure against your chest? A thump that came into quick successions, then stopped. For something soft and ever so delicate to press against your lips?
Everything was distant. So far away from your grasp. From your state of being. As if you were already long gone from whatever reality you were in moments ago.
"H—"
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It was almost like floating. A gentle sway and a crack.
A joyful gliding against the sky that soothed you away from worries and woes.
Thump. Thump. Lips.
Repeating endlessly. Happily. Wetly?
Thump. Thump. Lips.
You welcomed it. Whatever it was. Whatever kept the rhythm. The wonderful rhythm.
Thump. Thump. Lips.
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Thump. Thump. Lips.
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Thump. Thump. Lips.
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Thump. Thump. Lips.
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Thump. Thump. Lips.
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Thump. Thump. Lips.
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THUMP. THUM—
You shot up with a cough.
Your throat burned and head ached terribly. Your eyes almost felt like they were about to pop out of your head and roll away. You felt horrible.
It didn't help that you were drenched from head to toe either.
Beside you, there was a heavy and loud sigh of relief as he fell to his backside. He let a silence fall over you both as you recovered, hand pressed against your throat and heaving.
Jesus. Had you almost...
The thought alone almost made you sick.
"I'm sorry. I thought.... I didn't think you still couldn't swim." His voice was soft, barely heard over the waterfall. Kind and cautious, worried and terrified. Things that seeped from his tone as if it were bleeding out and bearing all its insides to you.
Exposing him to you.
You peeked over your loose strands of hair to glare viciously at him. "When would I have the time to learn to swim?" You shot back ruthlessly, not entirely caring from etiquette in this moment. "You've lost your mind."
"Right." Jinshi immediately agreed, almost looking fearful as he watched you.
You push yourself up and take in a deep breath, coughing slightly at the burn of your throat. Taking in your surroundings, you swore that this was that—
"Are you really alright?"
You glanced back at the man and found him still sat on the damp ground. His eyebrows are furrowed and a small frown on his lips as he stared up at you. It made you uncomfortable. To see such a glittering violet staring back at you earnestly. Honestly.
You instead clutch onto your dress, "Suiren is gonna kill me." You scoff, tugging the garments apart.
You could hear Jinshi sputter behind you. The gravel and dirt below him crunching as he probably scrambled up from his spot.
You spared a feeble look over your shoulder to find him with his eyes clenched slowed, hand covering your body from his gaze. You snap your gaze back around and tug the fabric a little too hard as you scoff.
You wouldn't deny the pang of hurt that clenched your chest.
"Don't worry, Jinshi-sama, you won't have to see my unruly body of mine for long. I just want to make sure Suiren doesn't slaughter me when we return."
"I— No, I'm just— okay." He finally muttered.
You are stripped down to your underthings, placing the dress and various pieces on the ground as delicately as you can to avoid too much dirt being stained into the fabric.
As you place the last bit of clothing down, you hear the flutter of fabric behind you.
Jinshi is a bright red, gently tossing his robe down behind him. His back is facing you and you know its for whatever mock sense of modesty he wants to give the both of you. You instinctively reach out and take his robe in your grasp, twisting it and squeezing it to watch out a fair amount of water drip out.
"You worry about mine later. Take care of your things first."
Yeah, right, You think as you twist it with an unrelenting grip. You are there to serve your master. It's one of the first things you learn. His needs came before your own. His needs were your needs.
Jinshi snatched the robe away and squeezed the fabric tight, an overflowing amount of water released from the cloth and into the ground.
Okay, so maybe he was better at it than you.
You nod, turning your attention towards your own garments and try to ignore the overwhelming feeling that you had eyes on your rear.
"So, um—" Jinshi cleared his throat when his eyes dragged away from you, cheeks a bright red. "What now?"
"Well, we could attempt at trying to swim back—"
"You can't swim."
"I was going to say that."
"Oh, sorry."
There's a soft silence between the both of you as you finish up. Gently redressing, you make your way towards the entrance of the cave, where the waterfall is blocking it from any negative eyes. You press your lips into a thin line and regard it bitterly. You remember this waterfall.... you could recall the times you whimsical pondered what it'd be like to ride down it like in those stories.
Jinshi had promised such when you both were too young and too dumb to realize how naïve dreams like that were.
You couldn't really judge that mini-you, for you had your own dreams of—
"Remember when Gaoshun first brought us here?"
You hadn't realized that Jinshi made his way over until he was standing beside you. Robes lose over his shoulders and tugging on his top layer. Violet eyes were watching the water as if it were a canvas of memories in the long distant past. Something to be admired and viewed with daisies and smiles. Not to be addressed as anything but good or amazing. Not to see the truth of it all.
You press your lips together, drawing in a heavy breath, "I remember you pushing me in the water and Gaoshun having to pull me out."
Jinshi's face screws up slightly, a faint blush on his features as he almost looks around with shame. "Right...." He straightens, "I'm sorry."
You blink, "Huh?"
Jinshi glances at you with a small smile, "I, uh, never really apologized back then. Made you apologize like you did something wrong." He explains weakly.
You raise an amused brow, "I told you I wished you would drown."
"I kinda deserved it!" Jinshi counters, his lips cracking into a grin. That charming grin he gets that makes your heart flutter. Make you hopeful for terrible and wistful. "I'm real sorry."
You smile softly, eyes kind and soft as you regard him, "I forgave you a long time, Jinshi-sama."
Jinshi's expression faltered, "Don't call me...." He trailed off awkwardly, turning his attention back to the unrelenting waterfall. You watched him for that moment. That split second where it looked like he was actually going to say something that would make you lightheaded. His jaw working and the muscle jumping as he seems to contemplate his next words.
Say anything and I'll cling to it, You think, watching his lips part, I always have. I always will.
"I'm surprised you were the one that followed me out. I thought the Apothecary might've done it."
You tense. That was certainly not what you expected him to say. Of all the things he could say? The Apothecary.
The waterfall in front of you is suddenly much too loud and violent. The cave seems to darken and your eyes drag from Jinshi to stare at your bare feet. Of course. Of course. Why wouldn't he want Maomao? Why had you even came here? Who were you to get between whatever silent signal he was trying to send to the other girl.
Him and Maomao. It was nicer than him and you. Jinshi and Y/n.
You straighten, pushing down any ill thoughts and heavy feelings into the dark pits of your chest and mind. "I apologize for the intrusion. I thought it'd make more sense for me to accompany you, Jinshi-sama."
"Why are you apologizing....?" He trailed off and then made a noise that sounded eerily similar to that of a caught man. "No, wait, I'm really glad that you're the one who came! Like really glad!"
"You don't have to spare me, Jinshi-sama. I'm a woman now, not a little girl."
"I'm not—" He visibly slumps, closing his eyes and trying to collect whatever thoughts he has and place them appropriately. He draws in a breath and faces you, looking oddly serious compared to his usual self. "I'm not trying to spare your feelings. I was just trying to say that— Well, it's not— I want you here, Y/n."
He's sparing your feelings. He's being kind. He doesn't actually want you there. You can't be friends.
You don't spare him a response. Instead, walking further into the cave. You raise your eyebrows, looking at the gaping hole above you where light and the sounds of nature filtered in. What could possibly get you both out of there...?
Whistle. Sit.
Of course. Him.
Jinshi sighs, "I spoke to Gaoshun before we—"
You place your fingers in the corner of your mouth and blow. A loud whistle bounces off the cave walls and out of the hole. You wait and hope to hear a bark or see the familiar tall man, but there's nothing.
"What are you doing?" Jinshi asks slowly, glancing between you and the hole above.
"Hello?" You cup your hands over your mouth and shout as loudly as you can. "Is anyone out there?"
Jinshi frowns, staring at you uneasily, "Y/n, please, we don't want to attract them this direction."
In the mess of almost drowning and seeing peeps of Jinshi's bare skin, you'd almost forgotten that you both had been chased down here by some violent assassin. Rather foolish, if you were honest.
You place the tips of your fingers against your lips and try to force the blush spreading across your cheeks off. "Sorry." You offer a bow of your head, despite the position you both find yourselves in.
You receive no response which causes you to peek at him. The stare that he's leveling you with doesn't bring you any type of comfort. It usually meant he was about to say something that—
"Hop on my back and see if you can reach up there."
—you wouldn't like.
Your eyebrows shot upwards and you stared at him with wide eyes. If Suiren was here and knew what he just proposed, she'd positively lose her mind. No matter how long she had known you— she'd think it improper. He was your boss and you were his lowly servant. To be in an position above him or treating him like a mat, it was...
It was simply ridiculous.
"But—"
"If you're the one below, you'll get crushed." He jabs a thumb over his shoulder. "Do it."
And that's how you ended up here. Legs wrapped around Jinshi's shoulders and heads, hand reaching out for the dirt above. You dig your fingers in and glance down at the man below you.
"Are you sure I'm not hurting you?"
Jinshi sighed for what seemed the hundredth time that day, his hand on your thigh squeezing gently. "Y/N, please stop asking me that."
You grimace, "My apologies, Jinshi-sama. Sorry." You shakily raise from your place, ignoring the soft and deep grunt Jinshi gives as you stand on his shoulders.
You dig your nails into the damp dirt and begin to tug yourself up.
This is it. Finally, you could get into the open forest once again. You're not going to be suffocated by his presence. Everything will return back to its rightful places—
You froze when it smacked you in the forehead.
You tried to keep calm as you felt the slimy breathing thing rest on your skin. Body tensed up and eyes staring widely at the bright sky above.
"Y/N?" Jinshi softly called, noticing the way you tensed.
"F—Frog." You utter, jaw clenched tight and you felt it shift as you take a deep breath. "A frog."
Jinshi blinked, looking up at you with his own wide eyes, "Hey, don't-don't freak out! Just shake your head and it'll hop off."
You shake a little, but follow his instructions. However, you may have overestimated the shake as you lose your grip on the dirt and begin to fall back.
"Hey!"
The tumble down is short and not all that hurtful, like you had been expecting. You had closed your eyes in anticipation, fear of having to watch the ground quickly approach too much for your tiny heart. You expected to feel the damp mud to be seeping into your clothes and little bits of stone and bark digging into your skin. However—
Nothing.
There was nothing except the soft silk under your fingers. The scent that resembled a sweet fruit, one that you had smelt quite often in the mornings. In the noons, the evenings, the nights, repeat. You knew that smell and that familiar beat against your own chest.
Peeking your eyes open, you find that Jinshi is already staring back at you. The first thing you notice is that you both are extremely close to one another. His breath fans against your dewy face, making goosebumps raise off your skin and a shiver sent down your spin. Next is his tender expression, Eyes gentle and twinkling. His expression isn't filled with pain or anything that would indicate that he was uncomfortable with the very short distance between you both. The last thing you notice is the fact that your body is pressed against his.
Your complexion flushes and you blink down at him.
He's warm. Incredibly warm. A sharp contrast to his damp clothes, which are open and pooling under his shoulder blades, revealing his bare chest to you. Your breath is ripped from you as you stare at the plump skin. You've seen it a million times. Every day as you help him get ready for the day. It should be normal. Should be something that doesn't make you lightheaded.
But it does.
He's right there. Right against you. You can feel his heartbeat ramming against his chest and into yours. You can feel every small breath he takes—as if hanging onto this moment with, what? Trepidation? Unease? You weren't entirely sure but you knew that you felt light.
Was it so bad that you felt nice in this moment? That this warmth was wrong? Was it so out of your reach that you simply couldn't imagine a man wanting to embrace you in a way?
You are to give your life to your master. Any inappropriate behavior will be punished, severely.
Yes. It was.
You clenched your jaw, ignoring the tender look in Jinshi's eyes as you try to bring your mind into the present.
The frog.
It wasn't anything that you wanted to touch, but Jinshi was your master. Your discomforts and fears must be pushed away for his sake and needs.
Reaching down, you feel for any signs of the frog. It wasn't large, but it wasn't entirely small either. It wouldn't be hard to find in all it's slimy and— There it is.
Your hand brushed it and you feel almost elated to find it. Your hand cupped around the bulge from Jinshi's robes. It feels much bigger than the average frog that'd been on your forehead. It was unmoving to, except for the small twitch it gives as you rest your palm down. You gripped it.
"Hng," Jinshi grunts, his eyes close. You're a little shocked as his hips shift, his hands at your hips dig into your flesh, almost too eager. You snap your eyes upward to his suddenly sweating and flushed face. "I-I'm sorry, but... but could you move your hand? It's making things, um, rather difficult."
Difficult?
You grip onto the twitching frog below you—
"U-Uh—" Jinshi moans in a deep and guttural way that would make anyone, especially you, malfunction. It doesn't help that his hands latch onto you harder, pressing you closer and releasing a stuttering breath against your ear.
Why was he squirming so much? Why was his face so red and dripping with sweat? Why was his chest heaving and his hands flexing around your skin? And why was this thing twitching and getting bigger in your hold....
Oh.
Oh.
You are to give your life to your master. Any inappropriate behavior will be punished, severely.
You felt a little sick at your intrusion. At the gall. You couldn't believe yourself. You had violated one of the single rules you were ever given. You violated Jinshi's space. His entire being. You were to be punished and hated— ousted from your position.
Disgusted with yourself, you slowly stand up. Jinshi's softly panting from his position on the ground, running a hand through his mused hair.
"S-Sorry, I haven't— I'm a bit—" Jinshi's obviously embarassed and uncomfortable. Look what you've done. You've ruined it all. "Hey, where are you going?"
Before you could think much more as his hands grip your hips once again and pull you down.
You're sat on his his lap and you could feel it.
"J-Jinshi-sama, I'm so-I'm so sorry!" You tucked your head down, shaking with trembling lips.
Jinshi's hands fall to your thighs, limp, "Eh...?"
"What I did was truly inappropriate and-and I will take any and all punishment!"
"Punishment...?" He sounded terribly confused, still a bit breathless. You keep your head ducked and he remains unmoved. "Why would I... you're not getting punished."
"I give my life to you. Any inappropriate behavior will be punished." You repeated softly under your breath, tucking your hands against your face to hide away from his gaze. From the judgement and hatred. "It's only just."
There's a longstanding silence between the both of you and you're hopeful that he's coming to his senses. That you'd be released and freed. That you would finally accept the gap and space between them. To fall away, finally, to the shadows.
It was tarnished the moment Jinshi wraps your hands around your own, gently prying your hands away from your face.
He doesn't look vengeful or angered. No. No, he looks kind. As he always has been. Kind and considerate. Honest and open. He'd always been so...
He'd never really been angry with you. Not without sadness being overbearing. Always so quick to forgive you. To push everything away with a smile and crinkle of his eyes.
"Y/N..." His words are as soft as his expression.
Your hands shake, "Please... Please hate me." You pleaded quietly, pressing your forehead against his hands as if he were a monk to be begged to.
"I'm not going to punish you or... or anything of the sort. Why would you want that?"
You draw in a watery breath, shoulders shaking, "It's easier to let go that way." You admitted.
"Let go of what?"
"Of my love for you."
"What?!"
His shout echoed off the cave walls. Your humiliation and embarrassment was quick to follow once it bounced back at you. Made you flinch back and try to push yourself back from his lap. Why did you say anything? Fool. Disgusting fool.
"Hey, hey, hey," Jinshi's hands wrap around your wrists and tug you forward a bit. You refuse to meet his eye. You refuse to be humiliated and demeaned— "Don't do that. Don't close off."
You clench your jaw and try to push the humilation deep within you, taking a deep calming breath as you stared at his bare collar. "You're so kind and so... you. I'm sorry if I make you uncomfortable or disgusted, but I need to tell you. And then I would hope that you would let me go."
Jinshi's eyebrows shot up. "Let you go?"
You've been thinking about this for some time. That it all would be better if, in the end, you were to serve someone else. That you were pawned off for some soldier instead of this slow torture. This uncomfortable, unbearable tiptoeing.
"I would like for you to offer me to a soldier or anywhere else."
The reaction is instant. The way Jinshi's complexion darkens and he stares at you with wide eyes. He slumps into the damp ground and almost turns into putty. His hold on you slackens and gives you ample opportunity to move away. But you're frozen in your spot.
"Why would I do that?" Jinshi's voice is quiet, slow, "You're... You're mine."
A blush takes over your cheeks, "Jinshi-sama, It's not appropriate! I shouldn't be like this with you."
"What if I like it?"
You blink at him. "Huh?"
Jinshi leans forward, his thumb gently skirting against your skin. "What if I have some love for you too? What if I don't care about what's appropriate or follows the rules."
I would ask who you are. You were tempted to say but your mouth was clamped shut in shock. Following the rules had been completely him. He was put in his current position now to ensure the rules in the rear palace were being followed diligently. The thought that he would love someone like you when there were people like Maomao or princesses out there. People much more deserving of his devotion. It wasn't right.
As if sensing you're not believing him, he pulls away and presses his lips thin. "Okay, I'll convince you." He straightens up and takes a breath. "I spoke to Gaoshun not too long ago. Before we came here and I know everything now."
A pause. Everything. He knew everything now? Everything is so much. Everything is... well, everything. What exactly had Gaoshun told him?
"What's everything?"
"That my mother didn't want you around anymore. That Gaoshun told you that you weren't allowed around me anymore. That you stopped being my friend and became my employee."
Your stare up at Jinshi with wide eyes. "That's not...Us being friends wasn't right anymore."
Jinshi frowned, shaking his head and his hands slide up to your arms. "If I had my way, I would've had you by my side all that time. Not as some lady-in-waiting, but as my equal."
You shake your head, ignoring the erratic beating of your heart against your chest. "Don't say that. Don't say things you don't mean, Jinshi." You beg softly.
Jinshi reaches out, wrapping his hands around your own, pressing it against his chest. "I mean it with everything in me. If it were up to me, I wouldn't have ever been separated from you. Forget what my mother said." His words were sweet, tempting. They made you lightheaded. So did the sudden brightness and tender smile on his face. "That's the first time you've called me Jinshi since we were kids."
"What? I've always called you Jinshi."
"No, you've always called me Jinshi-sama."
"Oh."
You suppose you had.
"Jinshi," You utter, unsure of what else you both could say.
Jinshi's expression, if possible, softens further, leaning forward an inch. "Yes?" He whispers back just as softly.
Your eyes trail between his eyes before moving to his lips, parted and glistening, "Jinshi..."
Jinshi's hand slides up your thigh and his lips are ghosting against yours, "I'm here. I promise." He whispers before pressing your lips together delicately.
Your heart soars. Your hands shakily press against his cheeks, drawing closer as his own press your hips together. He's soft. He's tender. He's cautious and all encompassing. Filling your senses and making you lightheaded.
As you both part for a breath, he flips you onto your back. His hand grips the underside of your thigh and presses you close enough that he lets out a soft and broken sound.
His eyes are heavily lidded as he gazes down at you, lips pink. "I just want you. No one else. I promise." He utters.
You twist your hands into his hair, eyes fluttering. "You're it." You pass back.
His lips are back on yours. Wet and eager. This is sudden. Fast. But you've been waiting for so long. Had been clinging onto the smallest of things. Desperate to have this closeness that you had now. To feel his skin against yours. His breath mixing with your own. Everything him and everything you intertwined.
You just wanted to cherish this—
WOOF!
You and Jinshi both tense up, jumping. Looking over his shoulder, your eyes widen upon finding a familiar dog staring down at you both, wagging tail eager and happy to see you.
Jinshi's eyebrows furrow, "Huh...?"
There's not much warning before the dog is jumping down. Landing straight on Jinshi's back, causing the poor man to let out a pained sound. He's squishing you against the ground as the dog stands on his back, happily lapping his tongue against your cheek.
Vague disgust and disappointment wash over you, but you smile all the same. "Oh, boy!"
He barks again. A greeting you're sure.
Above, Lihaku and, surprisingly, Maomao appear. Both of them stare down at you with varying degrees of emotions. Lihaku looked excited and kinda like his dog, while Maomao.
Well, Maomao looked all too knowing.
"Well, you look rough!" Lihaku called down with a grin, "Glad to see you're not dead."
"As am I!" You huff out a laugh, then look to Maomao. "Hello, Xiaomao!"
"Hello." Maomao said flatly, she looked lower and her face screwed up distastefully. "Is Jinshi-sama okay?"
Lihaku then he spots his dog and slightly pales, letting out a sharp whistle. "C'mon, boy!"
The dog eagerly jumps off Jinshi, going to sit by your head and wag his tail. The man above you sighs in relief, pushing up off you. He sits up and you try not to focus on the bright blush on his face.
"Why did he do that?" The royal asks.
"Must've thought something was wrong." Lihaku rubs the back of his neck, frowning down at you both. "What... exactly where you two doing?"
You and Jinshi glance at one another, furious blushes flushing over you both. Despite anything that Jinshi said, there were things that you weren't allowed to do. Rules and laws that forbid something like this form happening the public eye. For a man like himself from being with a woman like you. A servant with a beautiful prince.
Protecting him was the priority.
"Nothing!" You shout back, ignoring the eyebrow raise that garnered from both Jinshi and Maomao.
Everything was better left alone. A secret between the both of you. To cherish and hold for however long it may need. You could deal with the anger and longing later.
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babydollmarauders · 8 months
Text
OURS — TREVOR ZEGRAS
trevor zegras x fem!reader
part of the Speak Now Fic List
summary: in which y/n and Trevor’s relationship is constantly being criticized by outsiders but they know their love is real.
warnings: references to nsfw activities, hate from outsiders, dialogue heavy, not proofread
notes: written semi-quickly, shorter than my other recent works, idk how i feel about this one, but it’s done and i hope y’all like it. ending is kinda iffy but oh well.
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it seems like there’s always someone who disapproves of Trevor and i’s relationship.
my parents don’t like his carefree and confident demeanor. his younger brother didn’t trust me because i was someone new. his friends didn’t like that i write songs about exes and my relationships.
but most of all his fans and the media, judge us like they know us personally.
mostly judging me.
as a singer, my every move was criticized and picked apart. what i wore was either too homely or too dressed up. i was too skinny or too big. my heels were too tall, but then my nike’s were too ‘tom-boyish’. but the judgement had only seemed to get worse once i started dating Trevor.
suddenly his fans were saying i wasn’t good enough for him. analyzing our body language in photos and claiming that i didn’t act like i liked him. saying i was using him to further my fame.
but on the other side, i had my fans commenting that i was too good for him. citing his previous playboy ways and saying that he wasn’t smart enough or mature enough for me. claiming his bad boy attitude drew me in and that i would ‘come to my senses’ soon.
***
y/nofficial
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liked by trevorzegras, gracieabrams, and 151,308 others
y/nofficial summer with my boy toy <3
tagged trevorzegras
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trevorzegras my beautiful girl, you were off to a great start in the beginning and then you added the last photo
y/nofficial wdym? i think that ones my favorite!
trevorzegras whatever floats your boat mamas
gracieabrams cutest couple in the world ♥️
y/nofficial you’re the real loml <3
gracieabrams shhh i thought we weren’t telling trevor?
user26 NEW MUSIC COMING SOON?!
user81 i wonder if it’s about Trevor
jackhughes was i cut out of the last pic?! i thought you loved me, y/n 😪
y/nofficial in the wise words of Ariana Grande “you ain’t my boyfriend”
user40 the way she’s leaning away from him in the 5th pic? oh she’s over him
user95 she’s finally over the bad boy thing, i guess
user02 thank god! i don’t want her to get hurt!
user73 @/user02 HER to get hurt?! she’s gonna end up writing a slandering song about my baby Trevor and painting him to be an asshole
user02 @/user73 lmao yeah, well the shoe fits. why shouldn’t she write a song showcasing his true colors?
user73 @/user02 i’m not about to fight with a Y/N stan of all people— have fun supporting your famefucker
user02 @/user73 oh please, she doesnt need to use your little hockey asshole for fame when she’s already more well known than him
user12 we love a PR relationship 🫶
***
my converse squeak against the marble floors as i leave my execs meeting, catching the attention of many up and coming artists that are waiting in the lobby. i can feel their gazes following my every move, from when i stop in front of the elevator to when i press the down button, and i can’t help but laugh in my head; reminiscing of when i was the same way. star-struck and in awe whenever i saw any artists leaving the same doors i just walked out of.
but now, having been in the business for two years, that feeling has come and gone, replaced by small talk with those very same people that i once looked up to.
“hi.” i smile politely at a redheaded girl that sits close to the elevators, a notebook in her hand and stars in her eyes.
she looks around, as if searching, before she lets out an awkward chuckle. “oh- hi!”
the elevator dings twice before the doors open to another crowd of wannabe pop stars, and i step aside to let them out before waving a goodbye to the doe-eyed redhead and stepping into the elevator.
i’m excited to get back to my boyfriend, but that excitement vanishes when i scroll through twitter on my uber home.
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oh- that was fast.
i can’t help but scroll through the replies and quote tweets, and by the time i arrive back home, i’m disheartened to say the least.
i thought i was being nice by greeting her? even if i couldn’t stay and talk. but apparently i should take this as a lesson for the future, don’t say hi to anyone unless i can stay and chat.
and my mood only worsens when i make it into the house, calling out my boyfriend’s name, to which i get no response.
“Trev?” my voice echoes off the walls of our home as i step into our bedroom, in search of the six foot tall hockey player. but i come up empty, finding that he still isn’t home from training camp.
i slide my phone from my pocket, drafting up a text before ultimately trying my luck at a phone call instead.
the outgoing ring reaches my ear twice before it stops, the call picking up.
“hey babe, what’s up?” Trevor’s tone is light and airy, painting an immediate smile across my lips.
“hey, i was just checking in.” i sit upon the fuzzy white blanket that’s folded along the foot of our bed, running my hands over the soft fabric. “i thought training was supposed to end at noon?”
“oh, yeah, it did.” he confirms, and i can hear someone else talking in the background. “Jimbo and i decided to grab lunch and catch up a bit.”
“oh, okay.” i nod, despite the fact that he can’t see me, and i can hear him conversing with someone.
“shh. hold on.” he tells someone. “he wants to say hi.”
i laugh as Jamie’s voice comes through the line. “HEY Y/N!!!”
“hi Jame!” i reply, listening as he grunts, wrestling the phone from Trevor, i assume.
“i’ve missed you!” he sounds closer now, while Trevor sounds farther away, calling out for his phone back, confirming my suspicions. “when do i get to see you again?”
“i’ve missed you too. if it’s alright with Trevor, and if you’re free, you can come over for dinner tonight?” i tell him. “i can go to the store and grab stuff to make my garlic and basil chicken pasta.”
“oh my favorite! i’m in! i don’t care what Trevor has to say about it, to be honest.” his response causes me to laugh, while my boyfriends calls out an offended ‘hey!’
“see you later!” Jamie yells, as i assume Trevor gets his phone back.
“did you need anything else, babe?” Trevor asks distractedly.
“no, nothin’ else.” i stand, gathering my car keys from my nightstand. “actually, i’m gonna go grocery shopping, can you think of anything we need?”
“condoms,” he replies unabashed, and i blush at the thought that Jamie heard him. “and frosted flakes. i finished ‘em off this morning.”
i roll my eyes before teasing, “the condoms or the frosted flakes?”
“both.” my skin heats up at the reminder of our morning activities, Trevor having woken me up before the sun even came up.
“oh- uh- okay.” Trevor laughs as i stumble over my words. “i’ll grab some more…of both.”
“thanks, love you!” he waits for my reply before hanging up, and i pad out of the bedroom, slipping my shoes back on by the front door before heading out to my car. i wasn’t big on driving, usually letting Trevor take that responsibility, and avoiding it when possible, so i only really used it when i had to go grocery shopping, relying on ubers to go anywhere else.
i slip into the drivers seat, huffing when i find that Trevor messed with my seat again. a harmless prank he likes to pull, just to see when i drive again and if i’ll notice. i adjust my seat before i pull out of the driveway, the radio playing faintly to fill the silence.
*
i’m nearly done with my shopping trip when it happens.
“he still uses those?” i’m mid-tossing the family size box of Frosted Flakes in the cart when the words reach my ears, and at first, i don’t even notice they’re being spoken to me. “he always said it felt like he was wearing nothing.”
i glance over to find a tall blonde standing next to my cart, staring down at my items.
“i’m sorry?” my brows furrow in confusion.
“oh- the condoms. Skyn Elite? Trevor used them back when he and i used to hook up a couple years ago.” the girl smiles, the supermarket lights reflecting off her sparkly lip gloss. “you’re his new conquest, right? y/n?”
“i’m his girlfriend, yes.” i nod, pursing my lips together in a straight line.
“right,” she nods. “girlfriend. you got the envied title.”
“i guess so.”
she gives another falsely innocent smile. “good luck keeping it! he’s insatiable, is he not? seemed like he was always keeping an eye out for the next girl.”
i’ve never particularly cared about the ghosts of Trevor’s hookup past. why would i be? i had them too, so who was i to be bothered by his? besides, right now, he’s mine. i’m the one he comes home to; the one he loves and talks about a future with.
“well, i should get going.” i tell her, already beginning to push the cart towards the end of the aisle, in route to check out. “it was nice to meet you.”
i was lying, sure, but i wasn’t going to let her get to me.
she bids me goodbye as i walk away, and when i glance back, i see her faux smile drop, her eyes rolling as she sneers, turning the other way.
yeah, i pretty much expected that.
*
i’ve just made it into the kitchen, dropping the grocery bags onto the counter, when my phone begins to ring, buzzing in my pocket with an incoming call.
i do an awkward dance of trying to free my hand from a twisted bag handle, before retrieving the vibrating device from my pocket, my fathers contact taking up the screen. pressing accept, i hold the phone up to my ear.
“hey, dad!” i chirp, opening the refrigerator to begin unloading the food.
“hey, pumpkin. what are you up to?” his voice drifts in my ear as i put away a gallon of milk.
“just unloading groceries.” i inform him. “what are you and mom doing?”
“oh, nothing.” he sighs. “just missing our little girl.”
i laugh at his dramatics.
“i know, i need to come visit.” i stuff a few cartons of berries and a bag of grapes into the fruit drawer before shutting the fridge.
“so catch me up, honey. what’s new?”
“nothing really. i’m working on some new music, and i had an exec meeting this morning to discuss how the album is coming. but other than that it’s same old same old.”
i open the cupboard, taking care of the box of cereal and a couple bags of chips as i speak.
“and you’re still dating the uh…” he trails off. “the one with the tattoos?”
i can hear the disapproval oozing from his voice and my eyes roll in my head.
“Trevor, yes.” i confirm, walking down the hallway to our bedroom and placing a few things on Trevor’s nightstand before setting a new bottle of shampoo on our bathroom counter.
“yeah, him.” he sneers, and it’s then that i hear the front door open, two sets of footsteps reaching my ears. a smile spreads across my face as Trevor calls out my name. “i don’t understand why anyone would do that to their body. that’s permanent, ya know.”
“mhm.” i hum in disinterest. “hey, dad, i gotta go. i’ll call you later.”
“oh alright, honey. love you!”
“love you too.” i hang up the phone as Trevor steps into the room, smiling at the sight of me.
“there you are.” he beams. his arms snake around my waist, pulling me against him, and his head dips down to bring his lips to mine.
“here i am.” i mumble against his lips, causing a chuckle to arise from his throat.
“Jamie is in the living room. followed me home claiming that he had to see you.” he tells me, his eyes lighting up at the mention of his close friend.
“yeah, i invited him over for dinner.” i inform him. my hands cup the back of his neck, pulling him back down for another kiss.
my whole body relaxes, any tension disappearing when his lips meet mine. his eyes scan my face as he pulls away, and his faces falls, his lips forming an exaggerated frown.
“what’s wrong?” he whispers, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear before pulling my head to his chest.
his heartbeat echoes in my head, calming me immensely.
“nothing.” i mutter, my eyes falling shut when he begins rubbing circles on my back.
“i don’t believe you.”
“it’s nothing, really.” i insist. “nothing that’s actually bothering me. just a little annoyed.”
“what annoyed you, baby?” he sways us back and forth and his hand on my back trails down to tickle at my side, making me giggle.
“well,” i sigh and he pushes me back to look into my face. “i said hi to a girl at warner today-”
he hums, encouraging me to keep talking.
“but it was just a quick ‘hi’. apparently she’s a fan of yours, and she thought it was rude of me to greet her and then not stay and chat.” i explain. “so she took to twitter to say so.”
Trevor huffs, his nose scrunching in annoyance. “well that’s just stupid. you don’t owe anyone a conversation…. except me. because you love me, obviously.”
i laugh at his joke, making his face light up at his successful attempt to cheer me up.
“what else, baby?”
“well then, at the store, i ran into one of your ex-hookups.” i continue, and his brows thread together in confusion.
“which, ya know, doesn’t bother me.” i clarify. “but she made a comment on the condoms we use and implied that our relationship wouldn’t last long.”
“our love is not hers to speculate on.” he gruffs out in annoyance, and i nod along.
“i know. so i walked away.”
“i’m proud of you, love.” he presses a kiss to my forehead, a smile resting upon my face as he does. “is that all?”
“almost.” i breathe out. “then i got home, and my dad called as i was putting away the groceries.”
“okay.” he nods, obviously confused why i would be annoyed about my father calling.
“and he made some snide remarks about your tattoos.” Trevor barks out a laugh at that, quite used to people commenting on the art that adorns his skin.
“i ignored them, and hung up pretty much right after, because you got home. but, i just wish he could look past them, because then maybe he’d see the kind, funny guy that you are and understand why i’ve given my heart to you.”
his eyes squint as he grins at my words, bending his neck to pepper kisses across my nose and cheeks. i squeal at the affection and he pulls back to look me in the eyes.
“baby, i don’t care what your dad thinks of me. only that you like me. and i’m pretty sure that you love me just the way i am.”
i nod, biting my lip and holding back a smile. my cheeks turn hot, a blush settling over them, and he smirks at the sight.
“i don’t want you to worry your pretty little mind, baby.” he coos. “so someone was wrongfully upset that you didn’t take time out of your day to talk to them— who cares? people like to throw rocks at things that shine. and you, my darling, shine so beautifully bright. they’re just jealous.”
i roll my eyes at his cheesy statement, but the sentiment warms my heart. “thank you, Trev.”
“any time, baby.” he pulls me in for another hug, my head resting on his chest again. “our love is ours. nobody else’s. what other people have to say about it, and about us, doesn’t matter.
“you hands belong in mine, my heart belongs to yours, and no matter what life throws at us, i’m by your side.”
i open my mouth to respond, but i’m cut off by another voice.
“aww, that was sweet.”
i lift my head from Trevor’s chest, our heads both turning towards the entrance to our bedroom to find Jamie standing there with a cheesy smile.
“Jimmy, what are you doing in here?” Trevor lets out a wheezy laugh at his friend, his head dropping back and his shoulders shaking. the sound is like music to my ears.
this man.
i am so irrevocably in love with him.
“i got bored.” Jamie shrugs. “you guys were taking forever.”
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l5byrinth · 3 months
Text
safe and sound
“you'll be alright, no one can hurt you now.”
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pairing: finnick odair x reader
summary: in which finnick shows up at your doorstep and vents his heart out.
warnings/contains: fluff, idk tbh lmk if i should add more
requested
a/n: i combined this with another request bc they were quite similar but tysm for the requests anons 🫶🏼 btw i didn’t really know how to end it im so sorryyy it’s bad. actually this entire one shot is bad 😭
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As the sun set, you watched it from behind glass, captivated by the colours adorning the sky. It was something you rarely did, mostly because you had an insanely busy schedule as a former victor who lived in the capitol.
A knock on your door, however, ruined the one moment you had on your own. With a sigh, you walked towards the door, wondering who was visiting you at this hour. When you opened, you were surprised when you were met with Finnick. Yes, the Finnick Odair. The victor from district four who you had grown a fond friendship with. And had on whom you had a secret little crush on. “Hi, finn?” You questioned, rather than said, wondering why he was at your doorstep out of the blue.
Your relationship with Finnick was… difficult. The two of you had shared a kiss and admitted your feelings to each other before, but nothing really came from it. Mostly because you were both scared what would happen when the friendship you shared would blossom into something more. Besides, you hadn’t talked to him for quite some time.
And yet here he was standing silently in front of you. There was something about him that just didn’t sit right with you. His usual cocky and confident attitude, was replaced with an entirely different one. “Well, come in.” The door creaked when you opened it further and you cringed at the sound of it. He walked towards your living space, as if he had already been here countless of times, which he had of course.
It was like his second home before it got complicated between the two of you.
You closed the door behind you, before following him, a million questions filling your head. He didn’t utter a word, staring at the same sunset you had been watching only a minute ago. “Finnick, is everything alright?”
And it was as if that was his tipping point, because he suddenly stumbled into your arms. You were taken aback, that’s for sure, but you hugged him tight nevertheless. You cooed sweet nothings as tears left his eyes like a waterfall. While soothingly rubbing his back, you let him cry his eyes out, not caring that your sweater was now soaking wet from his tears.
“Finn, whatever it is, just let it out.” You said softly, waiting for him to have cried it all out. The man holding onto you for dear life felt ashamed for breaking down like this. But after what he had been through that night, he just couldn’t bottle it up anymore like he usually did. And when he realised it, the only person who he would want by his side was you.
“Sorry.” Finnick mumbled with his head rested on your shoulder. And if you weren’t so close to him, you probably wouldn’t have heard it. He pulled away, one of his hands lingering on your waist, as he wiped the tears on his cheeks with the other. He had been looking down the entire time, but when he finally looked up at you, you could see the pain and fatigue in his eyes. “Oh, finnick.” You put your hand on his cheek and he leaned into the comforting touch.
After he had calmed down, the two of you sat down on your couch. The same couch you were sat at when you finally admitted your feelings. But none of that was important at the moment. Finnick told you about everything he had been going through since he became a victor at the age of fourteen. The man in front of you told things you could never imagine anyone to go through. Your heart broke for Finnick the more he explained and you wished you had noticed this all sooner.
You drew him in for another hug, telling him you would do anything for him. You assured him, “We will get through this together and make sure nothing happens to you anymore. I’m here for you, Finn. And whatever you need, you can ask me.” Finnick nodded knowingly, wiping away the tears that had fallen down your face because of his story, “I know, love. You always are.”
“I know it’s hard, but whatever happens, you’re safe and sound. With me.” You grabbed ahold of his hands and pecked his knuckles lovingly, his heart skipping a beat. A small grateful smile made its way onto his face as he drew you in closer, wrapping his arms around you while you rested your head on his chest. It was as if a weight had fallen off of his shoulder and he let out a contented sigh.
He indeed felt safe and sound. With you.
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imakemywings · 6 months
Note
So Maeglin apparently was handsome af, popular, charismatic, and a close confidant of Turgon during his time in Gondolin. In fact, he was a lord and was close to Turgon's ear so he was heard more than Idril. I just wanna know why the fandom loves to portray him as this kid who was hated by everyone (he was not), whom Turgon hated (didn't Turgon love that kid so much?), and whose love for Idril was seen in a good light (when in fact, he was willing to kill earendil just to get Idril). I was honestly shocked when it was such a popular narrative that he was being abused and hated pretty much by everyone in Gondolin and he didn't mean to cause the fall of Gondolin because he was a poor mew mew when the real poor mew mew was Turgon for listening to him in the first place. Lmao I was just genuinely shocked when it was the other way around. I like his character, he's interesting and complex but it kinda takes away the complexity of his character when he is being woobify but that's just me. What do you think?
Anon, idk if you looked at my blog and could tell I would be receptive to these takes, or if you just happen to keep landing on things I agree with XD
But yeah, I have thoughts on Maeglin's reception by the fandom and it's mostly in agreement with what you said.
With Maeglin, he is sympathetic in a lot of ways, which makes you want to root for him. He did have a difficult childhood--Eol was a shithead spouse so it's not hard to imagine he was not a great father either. Maeglin grew up almost totally isolated from anyone but his mom and dad, who did not have a good relationship, thanks to his dad's abuse. When he and Aredhel make a run for it, we want them to succeed! We want good things for them (we've been rooting for Aredhel since the beginning of the chapter)! When Maeglin witnesses his father kill his mother in an effort to kill him, we want him to find peace and security in Gondolin.
The thing is--Maeglin grows well past his difficult childhood. As you noted, Maeglin does very well for himself in Gondolin. At the end of the chapter Of Maeglin, it is described how he "grew great among the Gondolindrim" and there are various indications he was generally trusted and well-liked.
"Thus all seemed well with the fortunes of Maeglin, who had risen to be mighty among the princes of the Noldor..." ("Of Maeglin," The Silmarillion)
At this point, this is we want for him! We like the idea that he's shrugged off his past, that he's doing well, and that he's not like his creepy bride-abducting father.
We don't get much in Silm about what Maeglin's relationship with Turgon is like, but I talked here about why I can't buy that Turgon neglected or abused Maeglin.
"Then the King listened with wonder to all that Aredhel had to tell; and he looked with liking upon Maeglin his sister-son, seeing in him one worthy to be accounted among the princes of the Noldor. 'I rejoice indeed that Ar-Feiniel has returned to Gondolin,' he said, 'and now more fair again shall my city seem than in the days when I deemed her lost. And Maeglin shall have the highest honor in my realm.'" ("Of Maeglin," The Silmarillion)
The only fly in that pudding is that he and Idril get off to a bad start which never improves. He's into her, she's not into him, but he can't let it go. He lets it fester and generate anger, jealousy, and hatred, and in this way, he's like so many creepy guys who can't take rejection.
"But as the years passed, still Maeglin watched Idril, and waited, and his love turned to darkness in his heart. And he sought the more to have his will in other matters, shirking no toil or burden, if he might thereby have power." ("Of Maeglin," The Silmarillion)
But even so, Maeglin is trusted by Turgon! He's popular! He has his own craft and people who admire and follow his ideas! In almost every way, Maeglin should be happy. But he cannot stop obsessing over Idril, and he lets that spoil everything else that he's achieved, to the point where he's wiling to betray the entire city to possess her.
I think there's also a disconnect between those who've read The Fall of Gondolin and those who haven't, because TFOG expands on a lot of things only really hinted at in Silm proper. For instance, the attempted murder of Earendil (who, it should be noted, is seven years old during the sack of Gondolin). In Silm, we get this:
"Tuor sought to rescue Idril from the sack of the city, but Maeglin had laid hands on her, and on Earendil; and Tuor fought with Maeglin on the walls, and cast him far out..." ("Of Tuor and the Fall of Gondolin," The Silmarillion)
In The Fall of Gondolin, we get a much more detailed account:
"Messengers by great stealth he had dispatched to Melko[r] to set a guard about the outer issue of that Way when the assault was made; but he himself thought now to take Earendil and cast him into the fire beneath the walls, and seizing Idril he would constrain her to guide him to the secrets of the passage, that he might win out of this terror of fire and slaughter and drag her withal along with him to the lands of Melko[r]... Now then M[a]eglin had Idril by the hair and sought to drag her to the battlements out of cruelty of heart, that she might see the fall of Earendil to the flames...When M[a]eglin saw [Tuor] he would stab Earendil with a short knife he had...the mail of the small coat turned the blade aside; and thereupon Tuor was upon him and his wrath was terrible to see." ("The Original Tale," The Fall of Gondolin)
In TFOG, Maeglin's malice is even more apparent as we get a blow-by-blow account of his effort to force Idril to watch him kill her child and then drag her to Angband, but even looking exclusively at canon Silm, Maeglin clearly swings into the villain path. I don't like to criticize him too much for caving under Melkor's threats, because being threatened with torture by Melkor would be fucking terrifying and I don't think any of us can say for certain how we would respond in that kind of situation. Tolkien even tells us Maeglin wasn't a coward, but Melkor is Melkor. Not everyone can be Hurin "Noted Badass and Snarkmaster" Thalion. What I am happy to criticize him relentlessly on is that he allows Melkor's plan to move forward.
"But Morgoth sent him [Maeglin] back to Gondolin, lest any should suspect the betrayal, and so that Maeglin should aid the assault from within, when the hour came; and he abode in the halls of the King with smiling face and evil heart..." ("Of Tuor and the Fall of Gondolin," The Silmarillion)
He never warns the Gondolindrim of what's coming, and in fact he encourages Turgon to refuse Ulmo's advice and stay in the city (where Melkor expects them to be). In TFOG, when Melkor does invade, Maeglin and his house fight on Melkor's side.
Maeglin fucked up by selling the city out, no argument. But it's more than that--he could have tried to fix it. But he doesn't. Because? Because he doesn't want his treachery revealed, and because Melkor promised him possession of Idril if he helped.
"Great indeed was the joy of Morgoth, and to Maeglin he promised the lordship of Gondolin as his vassal, and the possession of Idril Celebrindal, when the city should be taken; and indeed desire for Idril and hatred for Tuor led Maeglin the easier to his treachery, most infamous in all the histories of the Elder Days." ( "Of Tuor and the Fall of Gondolin," The Silmarillion)
People resist the narrative of Maeglin the villain I think because they are still in phase 1 where we want good things for Maeglin and for him to overcome his past. And he does...but then he chooses his own shitty path and throws away all the things he gained because he can't be content without everything that he wants, which includes Idril. Making all Maeglin's bad choices someone else's fault--Idril's for rejecting his advances, Aredhel or Eol for parenting him wrong, Turgon for not understanding him, Tuor for who knows--means not having to acknowledge Maeglin chose to become the person who betrayed Gondolin and tried to murder his family.
"Then the heart of Idril was turned towards [Tuor], and his to hear; and Maeglin's secret hatred grew ever greater, for he desired above all things to possess her, the only heir to the King of Gondolin." ("Of Tuor and the Fall of Gondolin," The Silmarillion)
Maeglin's story is a tragedy of someone consumed with their own malcontent, someone who had so much opportunity to be happy but chose to perserverate on the things he couldn't have, who became so obsessed with his own desires that he was willing to hurt everyone around him to get what he wanted. Maeglin's story is of a man who could not handle rejection by a woman he wanted, so he decided to ruin her life and kill her family. Maeglin begins the story as someone we are meant to sympathize with--but he doesn't end it that way.
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bunnimatsu · 1 year
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I know this sounds wierd af but um…how likely do you think the brothers would touch S/O’s boobs or butt (WITH THEM ENTHUSIASTICALLY CONSENTING OF COURSE)
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GIRL YOU AIN’T WEIRD FOR ASKING CUZ I WANT THEM TO TOUCH ME LIKE THAT
also i added a little personal touch to this since at first i didn't understand your ask, and i kinda just rolled with how i read it, so IM SO SORRY IF ITS NOT WHAT YOU MEANT
(small update: i got a little lazy and 'to the point' with these because this fandom is slowly slipping through my fingers :( so sorry if it isn't top tier)
tag(s): talks about booties and boobies so slight NSFW warning, ichimatsu being lowkey obsessed with you (as he should), etc.
osomatsu:
you don’t understand, he NEEDS to have a hand on you at all times. especially on your ass. he would constantly ask if he can touch your tiddies, even in public, and with your ENTHUSIASTIC consent, you’d mostly say yes and not care that others are watching but when its an actual inappropriate time, you’d be like “BOY SHUT UP”.
i think he likes touching your ass more tho and he more often than not, does the ‘put hand in the back pocket of your jeans’ thing.
karamatsu:
kara is also a 'put hand in the back pocket of your jeans' kind of person, but i think it's more of a 'im being protective of my woman/ kind of thing', but we all know....that's only half of the case.. i believe that karamatsu is a pervert but he chokes that shit down and hides it with his 'omg im so cool' facade. he gets nervous when he gets close to your tiddies tho, even if you consented or just did not care if he put his hands all over you, he would be like 'nope respect women juice comes first before my sick perversions'
choromatsu:
its a given, he's awkward as all fuck. listen, you consented, you told him you didn't care if he touched you, and he still sits there and stares at you awkwardly waiting for you to initiate something first.
one time though, he actually mustered up the courage to touch your boobas while you were making out and then he got cocky and started squeezing your waist, down to your ass and you moaned, of course, but his brain processed that as 'oh my god i hurt her' and he pulled AWAY.
you didn't forgive him for that one and he has apologized so many times since that day.
ichimatsu:
he's also a pervert that chokes it down, but i think in a relationship, his sick mind comes out more. OF COURSE, he would ask you first, he would never just let his intrusive thoughts win. and with your surprisingly enthusiastic consent...
all hell breaks loose..
what have you done, [name]?
that man is just as bad as osomatsu, his hands are EVERYWHERE on your body.
i think his favorite place is your ass tho. idk, its the perfect place to rest his hands on and he especially loves laying on it when you two have your lazy days.
he's just happy you exist tbh and he can do whatever he wants without having to feel bad about it.
jyushimatsu:
alright let me just make this clear, jyushimatsu is just as perverted as his other brothers, he just also drinks his respect women juice.
but once you give him free reign over touching you..
he's so 'cute' about it though, i think? he likes to mask the fact that he's tryna touch your tiddies with 'aww a hug from behind! how cute' kind of thing.
WE KNOW WHAT YOU ARE JYUSHI.
todomatsu:
totty is.....totty. of course he would wanna touch your tummy more because of your belly button, but this is about boobs and booty. i think he's in the same boat as jyushi, 'mask the fact that he's tryna feel you up with a cutesy act' thing.
if you're taller than him (this is gonna get self indulgent), he likes to rest his chin on your chest (boobs) and look up at you all innocent, like, YOU'RE NOT FOOLING ANYONE TODOMATSU.
i think in general though, he doesn't really touch you anywhere, even with your spoken consent. the only times he'll probably touch you there is when you guys are getting....steamy.
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the end! im so sorry this took so long to get out to you, anon. my life is just really busy and i never really have time off to myself anymore but hopefully this makes up for your wait! as i said, i did get a little lazy and just came up with some things on the spot but i hope its still worth reading! (i mean any matsu content is matsu content).
and as stated, my hyperfixation for this fandom is slowly dwindling but i really hope i can get back to it and get this content out for you guys!
also mini life update: i started my ear stretching process for gauges! its still very small and hopefully i can get it to a decent size, i don't want them TOO big because...ew.
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wolfjackle-creates · 11 months
Text
Ghost!Robin Part 12
My job ended so now I'm only part time employed. And I'm on vacation! So you get this chapter early in the day because I have plans later tonight. I think I'll have something to post next week, but I'm not sure. I'll be pretty busy this week, but the people I'm staying with do have work and school and stuff, so I should have time while they're doing that. Idk.
Story Summary: Danny was invited to dinner at Wayne Manor to meet Jazz's boyfriend and his family for the first time. He worked hard to make sure no ghost business would interrupt the evening. But when he arrived, all he could focus on was the ghost of the dead Robin that seemed to haunt Jason. Looks like he was breaking his promise.
First, Previous
Word Count: 1.2k
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Danny just blinked at him in confusion. “Who else was there? My accident is what activated the portal and started letting ghosts through. My fault, my responsibility. And since I became half ghost, I had the powers necessary to fix it. My parents were incompetent at best. I just did what had to be done. ”
Bruce’s eyes narrowed. “If your parents were so incompetent, who trained you? Who helped you?”
“I mean, at first it was just Sam, Tucker, and I. They were present for my accident and helped me figure out my powers. Jazz figured it out a few months later and covered for me until she eventually revealed she already knew and then started helping more actively. And eventually I made a bunch of allies in the Realms and they started teaching me. I’m learning sword fighting from the Fright Knight and Pandora, diplomacy from Queen Dorathea, medicine from my doctor, and so many more things. It’s why I’m not worried about getting a GED. I’m so swamped with lessons and responsibilities that I just don’t have the time right now. Even if my grandfather is the master of time.”
Surprisingly, it was Alfred who asked the next question. “Do you ever have time to rest?”
Danny grinned. “Absolutely. When it all gets to be too much, I call up my partners or little sister and run away for a bit. My council then pretends I’m harder to find than I am. Or I’ll fight them off if I’m not ready to go back yet. I won my title through trial of combat, after all. No one can beat me.”
Jazz pouted at him. “You could call me up more often for those escapades, you know.”
Danny laughed. “Call up Ms. Responsibility to help me shirk? Nah, you’re where I go when I need to focus and can’t do it anymore.”
She smiled at him. “I suppose I can settle for that.”
Damian tilted his head. “We have conducted extensive background checks on Jasmine after her relationship with Todd became known. You do not have a younger sister.”
“I do,” said Danny. “Her name is Dani-with-an-i and she’s either two years younger than me or fourteen depending on how you look at it.”
“You’ve been cloned?” Tim was staring at him, so shocked he’d even stopped typing.
“Dani doesn’t like being called my clone. She’s my sister and her own person.”
Tim shook his head. “No, sorry, I said that wrong. My best friend is a clone. Superboy.”
“Oh!” Danny grinned. “I get it. Dani would love an introduction if you think he’d be interested. Superboy was also created by a creepy billionaire who was obsessed with his template, right? They’d have so much in common.”
“Wait,” said Jason. “Vlad Masters actually cloned you? He’s not just some creepy rich dude but legit mad scientist?”
Jazz shrugged. “Supervillain more like. But we’ve got it mostly under control. Bruce, if he tries to set up a meeting with you between Wayne Enterprises and VladCo, let me know? He likes to overshadow his competitors and make them sign over their companies. It’s how he became mayor in Amity. But he won’t do anything if Danny or I are there.”
“Overshadow?” asked Bruce.
“Possession,” Tim answered for Danny. “Apparently it’s a basic ghost power.”
Bruce closed his eyes. “Of course it is.” Looking to Danny, he asked, “What else are basic ghost powers?”
“As I demonstrated earlier, flight—well, it’s more gravity nullification, but semantics—invisibility, intangibility. Then there’s ectoblasts—” he formed one in his hands and tossed it from hand to hand “—overshadowing. Um… and most ghosts have at least one extra power directly tied to their obsession. Like, Boxy, er ,the Box Ghost, has control over cardboard boxes. Lunch Lady has control over food. Things like that.” With a wave of his hands, he dissipated the ectoblast.
“And Vlad Masters has used these powers to win an election and steal other’s companies.”
“He also has the power of duplication. I’m working on it, but can only maintain two duplicates at a time and it takes a ton of concentration. Vlad can maintain dozens if not hundreds at once. And each duplicate can overshadow someone. It’s why he’s such a pain to fight.”
Jason raised his hand. “I’m sorry, can you back up for a sec. How long has Vlad had these powers?”
Jazz shrugged. “Since his university days with Jack and Maddie. There was an accident and Vlad got ghost powers like Danny.”
“Uh-huh.” Jason’s voice was tight and a slow spread of anger was filling the room. “And you first met him when you were a kid, right?”
“Yeah,” said Danny. “It was a few months after my accident, so I was fourteen.”
“Did he, a grown-ass man, start fighting you, a kid right from the beginning?”
“Look, it’s fine. He’s a fruitloop. I know that. He wanted to kill my dad and marry my mom and play father-son with me from the moment we met. And yeah, the fights were hard when I was a kid. But I’m way stronger than him now. He’s just got that one trick that is a bitch to account for. I’m fine. Have been fine. And now I’m old enough and disowned so my parents can’t even force me to spend time with him anymore.”
Robin face palmed at his last words and Danny threw his hands up in the air.
“What did I say this time? I’m fine!”
Bruce frowned. “I’m sorry the adults in your life have failed you so badly. I know you said you are receiving training from other mentors, but I do have extensive experience fighting with and against metas and will share my methods with you. Both you and your sister, excuse me, sisters are welcome here any time and I’ll make sure we have some rooms set aside for you anytime you’re on Earth and in New Jersey.”
Damian jumped to his feet, “Father!”
But before he could say more than that, Dick had rushed to his side and slapped a hand over his mouth and began whispering in his ear. Steph moved seats so the two brothers could sit next to each other.
Robin was grinning and pumping his fists in the air. He sent out welcome, family vibes towards Danny.
Emotions that were echoed by Jason who added a protect layer to them.
Duke let out a whoop. "I won't be the only meta around! Promise me you'll come by a lot."
Danny shook his head, but couldn’t stop the smile. “So, you’ve decided I’m not a threat, then?”
“Hn. It seems like you were a child, put into an impossible situation, failed by all the adults who should’ve protected you, and that you excelled anyway.”
Jason pointed his fork at Danny. “But don’t let him put you at ease. He will figure out ways to neutralize you if you end up going evil or get mind controlled. He does it to everyone, even Superman and Superman is his best friend.”
At that, Danny couldn’t help but laugh. “Good!”
Pulses of surprise came from both Robin and Jason.
“Look, I’ve faced both an evil future version of me and have had to deal with mind control.” He looked to Bruce and, serious now, said, “As soon as the Anti-Ecto Acts are repealed and the Guys in White disbanded, I will help you write those plans myself.”
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Next
The family is finally warming up to Danny and at least some of them want to bring them in! Damian is the least happy about it.
Tag List Part 1
@addie-lover-of-stories, @justwannabecat, @gin2212, @amercurio, @regonold, @overtherose, @readerzj, @sjrose1216, @echoednonny, @deeterzz, @blu-lilac, @number-one-jew, @rowanaway-fromthisbs, @vythika96, @tired-yet-awaken, @themirrorghost, @emeraldcorpral, @all-mights-asscheeks, @darkhinauniverse, @blep-23, @phandomhyperfixationblog, @larkcoe1, @thegatorsgoose, @job-ross-the-second, @britcision, @lenacraft, @bubblemixer, @androgynouslordofescapism, @purefrickingspite, @leftmiraclechaos, @lizisipancardo, @starlight-sparks, @miraculousandmore, @gildedphoenix, @sometimesthingsfallapart, @letmesayfuxk, @phoenixcatch7, @skulld3mort-1fan, @abaowo, @dhampir-princess, @idkmrpianoman, @sarina-elais, @ballzfrog-blog, @undead-essence, @spookytragedyshark, @flyingpansaurus, @akintoabitch, @marivictal, @8-29pm, @justreadingthefanfics, @happybear135, @kisatamao, @spoopyspoony, @adorablechaos, @sara0055, @screamingtofillthevoid
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vodika-vibes · 4 months
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Heyyyy!!!!
Can I have a Cody finds out/being told that f!reader is pregnant? To make things more complicated lol f!reader is a jedi
Idk where this came from tho… if you don’t have the time or inspiration it’s fine, I love u 🤍
And A Baby Makes Three...
Summary: You find out you're pregnant, and now you have to tell Cody.
Pairing: Commander Cody x F!Reader
Word Count: 996
Warnings: Talk of pregnancy
Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni
A/N: hihi! Thanks for the request! I hope you like it!
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You frown at yourself in the mirror and pull your robe tight across your stomach. It’s not obvious yet, at least, and you suppose, with a little clever misdirection with the force, people might not notice the baby bump at all.
At least, you hope so.
You’ve been the Jedi General of the 212 for over a year and a half now. And while no one had been happy when the order was given, in hindsight you have to admit that it made sense.
After all, Obi-Wan was a negotiator. He was at his most effective using his words to convince both parties to come to an agreement. You, however, had spent the majority of your jedi career careening from one civil war to the next.
You know military strategy like you know the back of your hand.
And, with the sudden death of Palpatine, and the startling knowledge that he had been pulling the strings on both sides of the war…well, having the skilled Negotiator sitting in meetings day in and day out was far more important than having him on a warship.
Of course, he doesn’t seem to be doing the greatest job at bringing about an end to the war, since it’s still going on.
You release the front of your robes with a sigh.
Honestly, what is the point of even having that implant if it’s not going to work like it’s supposed to. You fold your arms over your chest, and tilt your head back as you try to gather your thoughts.
You need to tell Cody, obviously. Mostly because the baby is his, and partly because the fact that you’re going to be pregnant is going to have to change the way the battalion approaches any upcoming battles.
You release a sigh and rub the back of your neck, trying to ease the tension before it turns into a headache. It’s not going to work, the only person who seems to have the ability to massage away your tension headaches is Cody, and he’s busy.
You hear the familiar sound of your door code being keyed in, and you turn towards the door, or maybe not. The door slides open, silently, and Cody steps into the room, and allows the door to slide shut behind him.
Everyone on the ship knows about your relationship with him, but it’s better to not show it off.
Tension drains out of his body as he sets his helmet on the table next to the door, and you smile sympathetically, “Rough day?”
“That’s putting it mildly,” He glances at you, and then takes a moment to remove the top part of his armor, before he crosses the room to slide his arms around you and bury his face in your neck, “We got word from Fox, there’s been no truce agreement yet.” He mumbles.
“So another month of war,” You say with a sigh.
“So another month of war.” Cody agrees, pulling back to press his forehead against yours, “They’re thinking of sending us back to Umbara.”
“Until we get actual orders, let’s just hope that that’s a rumor,” You reply softly as you reach up to soothingly card your fingers through his hair.
“Yeah,” His eyes close as he relaxes into your touch, “How are you feeling? You woke up pretty sick this morning.”
You smile wryly, though it goes unnoticed for the moment.
“Told you that you shouldn’t have eaten Boil’s experiment. You’re lucky a small bout of nausea is all you got,” Cody continues.
“It wasn’t that bad.” You defend.
“Cyare, it was moving.”
“That…is true.” You admit, grimacing as you remember Boil’s meal, “But he was so excited to cook-”
“You don’t have to keep humoring my brothers, cyare. We already like you.” Cody mumbles.
“I genuinely like your brothers, Cody. I like seeing them happy.” You say lightly, “But, as it happens, I wasn’t sick because of last night's dinner.”
His eyes snap open and he scans your face, “You weren’t?”
“No. I wasn’t.” You trail your hand across his cheek, “And I’m afraid I’m going to be sick for a bit.”
His brow furrows, “Do we need to go to the Medbay?”
You huff out a breath, “That probably won’t hurt, but I need to talk to you first.”
“Okay?”
There are a million different ways you can say this, but you think that, in this situation, the hard facts are the easiest, “My implant failed. I’m pregnant.”
Cody blinks at you, his jaw slightly slack.
“You-...really?”
“Really.” You confirm, “The force doesn’t lie.”
He blinks at you again, and his gaze drifts to your stomach, “A baby,” Cody sounds stunned and a bright grin crosses his face, “That’s…that’s wonderful! I’m going to be a dad!” And then the smile fades, “Oh…shit. This is going to change how we handle missions, isn’t it?”
“Oh, undoubtedly. I’m going to get fat. Which means no more vents.”
“It means you’ll have to start staying back at the command tent.”
You purse your lips, “I do not like that.”
“You don’t have to like it. But you do have to accept it.” Cody replies, and then he kisses you, a series of quick, loving kisses, and when he pulls away he sets his hands on your shoulders, “Okay! We’re going to Helix.”
“Can’t we go later?” You whine, even as you allow him to direct you towards the door.
“Nope.” Cody keys open the door and propels you into the hall, “Because, cyare, Helix is going to have to learn a whole new branch of medicine to help keep you healthy. Two, even, because he’s not a pediatrician either.”
“...now I feel kind of guilty.”
“He’ll get over it. Maybe.” Cody says easily, “Or, if he’s angry, it’ll be at me and not you.”
You eye him suspiciously, and Cody’s smile is a bit too innocent for you to believe it, “You’re fragile, cyare.”
Your jaw drops, “I am not!”
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ubehalayas-blog · 10 months
Text
Kyle w fake s/o that has a crush on him (?) 
The only reason Kyle did this was to get his parents off of his back
They were worried and thinks that Kyle might be gay because for the whole high school Kyle never brought at least one girl back to their house (not that they actually cared though)
Although Kyle was not having it, he wasn’t gay (mhm sure) and thought of just asking for ur favor to fake date him until the summer ends so that his parents would get off his back.
It goes a bit like this:
“Hey– Y/n I have a favor to ask you” “can we.. like– be girlfriend and boyfriend but fake? Like you get what I mean, you read books–” “but if you don’t I mean like we fake date like we do couple things but just for public well for my parents because they’ve been on my back ever since the fucking summer started, they’ve been hinting to me that it’s okay if I came out to them as gay” he rambled on and on, explaining the pickle he was on
“Alright– I get it, Kyle”
“Oh yeah, right sorry” 
You two set like typical house rules for it, 1. No one can know, even best friends. 2. No touching allowed unless it’s consented. (of course my man Ky is a gentleman) 3. No falling in love with each other. 
“Does the last one even matter?” 
“I think–” you lied, (it didn’t matter but somehow most books you read had that rule but ended up falling for one another and you like Kyle so– it must be a spell that should be added right?)
You ended up putting a fake relationship in front of everybody, including your friends and parents.  
Stendy probably invited you to a double date or two, Stan suspects that two of you were pretending to be bf and gf but Kyle debunked his suspicions when he kissed you in front of Stan, you were shocked but kissed back. Let’s just say that the car ride back to your house was awkward, something like:
“We’re here”
“A-ah.. thanks, I.. I enjoyed today” you mumbled, taking off your seatbelt.
He just nodded, never letting his eyes away from the wheels because he was too nervous and embarrassed with what he did. 
He probably took you out on a date or two, on those dates he was given some money from his parents that he used to pay for his and your meals. (let’s js say you don’t have to spend any money when ur with him)
Honestly, Gerald and Sheila was your fan, they loved, adored you so much, they were so thankful that you’re Kyle’s girlfriend. They probably laughed around with you as they told stories about how they were thinking was gay and all, Kyle would probably redden from their embarrassing stories and would shout, “MOM! DAD!” when he thinks they’ve told too much lmao.
At school, he waits for you to finish your classes because he drives you to school and back.
Kyle invites you to study dates in his house but mostly because Sheila always wants to see you, (little did you know Kyle liked seeing you too) sometimes that study date ends with you staying in their house– you insist not to but Sheila and Gerald always find a way for you to stay.
You staying at Kyle’s house always ends up with you sleeping on the bed and Kyle on the floor, Kyle probably thinks that it’s too embarrassing to let you sleep on the floor so he volunteers. But when you said that it’s okay for him to sleep next to you he blushes and rambles on about not wanting to make you uncomfortable and stuff, it took you a while of convincing when he finally slept next to you.
The next day was a pain honestly lmao, his arm was wrapped around you, he basically fell off the bed when he realized he hugged you in his sleep. Maybe a bit like:
Kyle grumbled in his sleep, the sun hit his eyes as he slowly opened his eyes. His gaze landed onto your sleeping body and his arm that was wrapped around your waist, his eyes widened as he gasped, backing away from you as he fell down to the floor. The loud crash made you wake up, you rubbed your eyes as you looked over Kyle who was breathless and rattled, "What's wrong..?" you mumbled, "N-nothing.. I just fell off" He stuttered.
lol Idk, I find it funny when things like that happen.
I can't think of anything anymore honestly, my brain is fried and this is just a worthless attempt to do head canons because I seems to can't write some.
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conanssummerchild · 2 months
Text
im bored as shit so im going to asign a community person/ship to every conan gray song bcs i really just use this site as a stream of my conciousness, if anyone has a better one for any of them feel free to tell me, also fair warning abed is my fav character, i'll try not to make everything abt him and troy but no promises
grow: the whole final episode really but im thinking mostly jeff tbh or also abed leaving for LA, or even maybe troy leaving on his voyage ☹️
idle town: the 'town' being greendale i feel like this applies to jeff also 😭 like its abt all of them but its jeffs pov
generation why: im thinking my girl britta hehe idk how to explain it but the vibes are so there
crush culture: im thinking annie, but also maybe jeff, aro king 👑
greek god: im thinking maybe abed in high school? i would say annie but she seemed to care more about fitting in while abed had accepted he couldnt, also hes like insightful and observant yk
lookalike: oh my god, brittas pov and its about jeff and slater oof
the other side: troy and abed, specifically in geothermal escapism 😭</3 im killing myself why would i do this
the king: okay fuck this is so trobed coded, abeds pov
comfort crowd: the whole study group tbh <33 in more specifics i was thinking jeff + the study group and honestly abed and annie
wish you were sober: i mean this one has to be either jeff and britta or britta and troy, though troy and britta could be taken either as britta wanting to go party and smoke weed or wtv and troy not rlly doing that stuff or britta feeling rejected bcs of troy giving all his attention to abed 😭 (like as in wish u were sober being wish u werent a raging homosexual)
maniac: probably i'd have to say jeffbritta from either pov
(online love): i... dont know tbh. the vibes are giving annie and troy for some reason, maybe once troys already left?
checkmate: the fond eyeroll i had to give, jeff and britta again. maybe annie being pissed at jeff over their kiss but i dont ship them romantically
the cut that always bleeds: idk, maybe jeff and annies weird ass relationship that keeps fucking happening is the closest, from annies pov
fight or flight: idk tbh, maybe trobed and britta if i had to go with smth, this one is mostly EXTREMELY byler coded (from stranger things) and im never fucking letting that go
affluenza: ok i mean ive gotta give this one to jeff dont i
(can we be friends?): troy abed and annie <3 im so soft for them
heather: ok fuck i HAVE to say trobed and britta and its abeds pov and if we're being specific them in virtual systems analysis becuase i'll never get over this episode ("ive run the simulations, i dont get married :/") bcs i fucking love abed being jealous of britta while she was with troy in the cool way but also in the sad if troy cant love me no one will way
little league: this is troy and abed when troy leaves :(((( and this is canon bcs my beloved wife and i are so troy and abed coded and she loves little league sooo
the story: ok so the boy and the girl are hmm annie and abed, the boy and the boy are troy and abed duh doy, him and his friend are maybe idk britta and troy, i dont wanna say jeff or abed bcs their dad/mum abandoned them and that bit's abt wanting to get away from ur parents yk
fake: (😭) maybe jeff (alan's pov 😔😔💔💔) nah but fr i see people joking abt his song but its lowkey fire
overdrive: WHY DO THEY ALL MAKE ME THINK OF JEFF AND BRITTA
telepath: jeff 😔 and 😔 britta 😔
movies: ok i literally cant say anyone other than abed, the king of movies. im not really feeling troy tho, maybe rachel, like maybe when abed kept trying to super speed run their relationship and he was anxious abt not passing the relationship tests
people watching: the MOST annie coded song ever holy fuck she is so people watching coded i love her so much
disaster: abed. or britta. my abandonment/commitment issues babies <33
best friend: TROBED. THE ONLY BEST FRIENDS EVER
astronomy: would it be absolutely too painful if i said troy and abed. honestly i actually think im feeling more jeff and abed but not like at eachother just both of them together in their sadness, from their pov to someone else (britta and troy probably seeing as these r their main romantic interests)
yours: AHH THIS SONG DEAR GOD </3 can i say abed jesus fuck im killing myself this one for abed hurts so much, not really directed at anyone in specific, or more like just directed at everyone, just his abandonment issues :( ("i dont always see it coming" PUT ME DOWN)
jigsaw: oo britta, my queen she just wants to be loved so bad </3 but also a bit abed ("if being less insane would make you stay" oof)
family line: okay. jeff.he actually invented having daddy issues
summer child: ok its abed bcs i kin him idc, im conans summer child™ and i said so /lh
footnote: not quite sure, very annie coded imo. maybe trobed? either pov ig but im feeling troy
memories: hm, trobed after troy leaves? abed trying to get over him but he keeps imagining troys still there with him like as in one of the hallucinations he has bcs i read a fic like this yesterday and it was sooooo good, idk maybe this is a little far fetched
the exit: im not rlly sure actually, either jeffbritta after the whole i love you in front of anyone fiasco or trobed when troys dating britta 🤷‍♂️
never ending song: ok, jeffbritta.
winner: THE MOST SONG EVER. ok this one is abed. it will always be abed. family line i feel like is more about a hostile home enviroment and jeff implies that his was, while winner is more pain of neglect or disconnect so i feel like its more appliable to abed because of how hes shown to not be understood by his parents and feels responsible for his mother leaving and this makes me think of the line "you dont really wanna hear the truth, do you?" because like his mum loving him on paper but not actually loving who he is or be willing to accept hes different and has different needs FUCK abeds mother all my homies hate abeds mother (what im not projecting at all my parents definitely love me and accept that im autistic /s)
killing me: im not quite sure actually. conan did write this song about someone who gave him tonsilitis and abed cannonically had tonsilitis though so 🤯
lonely dancers: hmm i feel like this song is upbeat enough to be trobed being silly tgth but maybe its more jeffbritta coded, or jeff and abed abt britta and troy, or vice versa, not sure
sorry i never mentioned shirley i do love her
feel free to take any of these as platonic or romantic idrk, a lot of them i couldve meant either way anyway
if u even made it this far u can have a gold star ⭐️ there u go
40 notes · View notes
btsgotjams27 · 1 year
Text
fool for you ~ jjk | final
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you have to decide if jeon jungkook is perfectly wrong for you.
✨ title: fool for you | ✨ pairing: jungkook x f!reader ✨ word count: 7.7k | ✨ rating: R ✨ genre/au: romance, light angst, fluff | college, fake dating, strangers to friends to lovers ✨ warnings: language, jk is a sweet dummy, but we love him anyway, jieun is just as insecure as reader and jungkook (yes, i'm trying to make y'all feel bad for her), confessions, taehyung's a good friend, time skip, jin's shoulders (you'll understand when you see the photo), yoongi shows up again, kissing, making out, marking, a smol, not so smol erection 🙈, groping, touching ✨ playlist ✨ a/n: okay, so, i'm just not happy with how this fic went T_T i literally have no one to blame but myself! the end of part 4 was actually never supposed to happen, but i wrote it in anyway *facepalm* i was stressed for days bc i'm like how do i redeem this cute, fluffy couple?? *sigh* but i tried my best(?), and i *do* explain why jk did what he did, and if you don't like it, then ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ idk what to tell you. anyway, sorry for the rant, but i just wanted to thank @here4btsfics for listening to me ramble about this fic and talking me through some plot points. ily. ✨ a/n 2: this is also not beta'd bc well, i'm impatient af. so if you see typos, that's why lol. ✨ if y'all want any cute or smutty (must be off anon) drabbles with this couple, just drop it in my inbox :) ✨ Any feedback, reblogs, and asks are appreciated.
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[ SERIES MASTERLIST ] prev
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Jungkook was ashamed of his actions at the carnival. It wasn't fair that he kept the kissing booth from you. Instead of letting it unravel as it did, he should have told you the truth. He didn't want to do what 'old Jungkook' would have done to make Jieun jealous. Because you had nothing in common with her. You were thoughtful and generous. And he realized he was bringing out a side of you you didn't know you had until he showed up - and that wasn't fair.
But he did enjoy that you took ownership of him, dragging him away from the line of girls. That was sexy for him, but that's beside the point. He made a mistake and needed to make amends before it was too late.
So, he got up early and put on some decent clothing besides his standard oversized shirt and sweats. He double-checked his reflection in the mirror. Before opening the door, he tugged at the collar of the brown flannel and flattened the black slacks. However, he was greeted by none other than his ex.
"What are you doing here?" he deadpanned.
Jieun somehow looked like shit today. With barely there makeup, hair in a bun, an oversized hoodie, and leggings. "Can we talk?"
He stepped through the threshold, closed the door behind him, waited for her to continue, and was displeased to see her.
"I'm…leaving."
Jungkook eyebrows knitted together in confusion, thinking okay, then leave.
"I'm moving back to New York." Jieun had mentioned it when they were still together, but she never made the decision.
"'Kay, have a safe trip then," he mumbled, stepping aside from her. He had places to go anyway.
Jieun put her hand out to stop him. "Kook–we're going to leave things like this?"
Jungkook clicked his tongue. "What do you want me to say, Jieun?"
She shrugged. "I don't know…are you going to miss me? Us? The way we used to be?" Jieun had been kicking herself ever since she had slept with Jimin. She had no idea how lucky she was with Jungkook. She was certain she had lost him and could not get him back. She reasoned that the best way to let go of Jungkook was to start over in a new city, far away from all the pain and suffering she had caused.
Jungkook wasn't made of stone. He'd been with her for a year. Although their relationship was mostly physical, they had fun together. She was fun to party and sleep with, but he couldn't see himself with her in the future. Their relationship was never more than that. Was he to blame? Hers? Perhaps both. Could it be that they hadn't met the right person with whom to do all that 'relationship' stuff?
He shrugged. "Yeah, I guess." Jungkook didn't want to be a jerk. After the fiasco with her and Jimin, many of her friends completely abandoned her. He could tell she was lonely.
Jieun chuckled, reaching for the fuzzy pink bunny keychain attached to his keys. "Remember when you tried so hard to win that for me?"
Jungkook peered at the keys in his hand.
"Was that our first date?"
Jungkook nodded.
"You spent so much money. And I swear that game's rigged, plus that guy wasn't letting you off the hook either," the two of you chuckled at the memory.
"And then at the end, when you won it, you said you worked so hard for it that you were going to keep it." She leaned over, trying to catch his gaze. "See, we did have fun together."
He wasn't sure where she was going with this. Maybe she needed some sort of forgiveness or closure from him to move on with a new chapter of her life.
"I know you hate me, Kookie—"
Jungkook interrupted. "I don't hate you." Even though she has hurt him, he does not believe he will ever hate her, and he will never in his heart hate anyone. "I was upset and hurt, but I could never hate you."
With the number of women Jungkook had dated, one would think he was a fuckboy, but he was quite the opposite. He was always true to the person he was dating, which was one of many lessons his parents taught him.
Jieun smiled half-heartedly. "Kook, you're only saying that because you have a good heart. That is one of the many reasons I will never forget you." She moved in closer, fiddling with his shirt collar. "I know you don't owe me anything, but can I ask one thing from you, and then I promise you'll never have to see me again?"
Was she really going to be out of his life for good? She'd been a menace since she saw you and Jungkook together. But, out of the goodness of his heart, he would trust her one more time. "What is it?"
"Can you kiss me like you mean it?"
Jungkook let out a scoff. "Are you kidding me?"
After everything she's put him through, she dared to ask this of him. Jieun was at the top, having everything handed to her on a silver platter. Only now to be at the bottom, searching for anyone to talk to her. So Jungkook was her last resort because she knew he had a good heart even though she had hurt him.
"I know it's stupid to ask of you, but I love you, Kook. I just…I just want to remember us–you like how we used to be, you know…before…." She paused, not wanting to bring up her infidelity again. Her guilty conscience ate her alive, sucking her in like there was no tomorrow. She knew she messed up a good thing when she asked Jungkook to kiss her, going in knowing he'd say no, but she couldn't help but try.
"If I do this, you'll stop trying to come between Y/n and me?" Jungkook didn't know for sure if she'd go back on her word. But considering she was moving back to New York, he was putting his faith and trust in her.
She extended her pinky, hoping he'd reciprocate. He hesitated but chose the kiss over the pinky promise. He kissed her but felt nothing because he didn't have feelings for her—it was you. Jungkook knew he'd have to tell you about Jieun's kiss. He knew telling you was risky, but he'd rather tell you the truth than a lie.
Jungkook pulled away, cupping her face, gazing into her eyes one last time. "Goodbye, Jieun."
Jieun began to back away. He quickly opened the door to his room, closed his eyes, and exhaled deeply. He now had to find the strength to tell you he had kissed his ex and then confess his feelings. He anticipated you to reject him and move on.
Jieun noticed you approaching as she walked to the hall entrance. Jealousy resurfaced in her body as she realized she'd never get back on Jungkook's good side. Jieun did what she was good at—-she mocked you, saying you'd lost. But she was only saying those things to make herself feel better, even though she was miserable. She was well aware that she couldn't compete with you. Jungkook had fallen head over heels when she saw you kiss him at the party. She wished you would treat Jungkook a million times better than she could.
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"I might kiss you," he whispered.
"I might just let you."
Every fiber of Jungkook's wanted to kiss every inch of you. Wanted to know your ins and outs, wanted to see what you loved, what your body craved, but he stopped himself. He thought, what was he doing? This isn't how he wanted to treat you. He wanted to treat you better than anyone he's been with before.
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry. I'm being stupid and selfish and thinking with my dick instead of my head," he said, pulling back from you.
You couldn't believe how much you wanted to kiss him despite knowing he had kissed his ex-girlfriend. You hadn't even bothered to ask why he did it. "We're both stupid," your voice trembling, "I just saw you kissing your ex, and now I'm about to kiss you as well. I should...I should leave," you said as you turned to unlock the doorknob.
"Wait–do you even want to hear my explanation?"
You sighed, turning back to him. "What's there to explain Jungkook? You'll always be with girls like Jieun, and I'm not in her league. So I understand if you want to rekindle your relationship with her. People like you deserve to be together."
"So, you won't even give me a chance to explain? And what do you mean, people like us deserve to be together?"
"It's nothing–I…should go before I say something I regret."
"I was kissing her goodbye!" Jungkook cried out because he felt you would leave before he could explain himself.
You shook your head and scoffed. "That's some goodbye kiss. Bye, Jungkook."
"Look, I know you don't owe me anything, but can we just talk about this?"
You weren't sure what else there was to explain. This all started because you decided to shoot your shot with Jungkook. Then agreed to be his fake girlfriend and ended up liking him because he seemed like a decent enough guy. But in the end, it was you who was a fool.
If Jungkook truly cared about you as a friend, he would have told you about the kissing booth. He wouldn't have kissed all those girls in front of you if he was a good fake boyfriend.
But unfortunately, he was neither of those.
"You wanna talk?" you took a step toward him, pressing your hand on his chest, pushing him back. "Let's talk."
Jungkook was taken aback by your sudden boldness. He walked backward until he hit his bed and sat down.
"You could've told me about the kissing booth–as your fake girlfriend, that was unfair. Why are we pretending to date if you want to go around kissing other girls? If you were sucking faces with other girls, Jieun might not have cared, but I'm not her, and I care. I understand you had unfinished business with Jieun, but did you have to kiss her too? I was naïve to believe I could be friends with you because I didn't know who I was kidding when I tried to separate my romantic feelings from you. And, despite my best efforts, I fell for you."
Jungkook had previously had girls confess their feelings for him, but this was different. This felt real---genuine. You sounded like you were speaking from the heart. He's never had a confession like that before. After hearing everything, a part of him wanted to flee. He was afraid of not being good enough for you, especially after his actions. You deserved better than anything he could ever give you. He had no idea what you saw in him.
You stared at Jungkook and then at the floor, waiting for him to say something. "Well, you said you wanted to talk."
He paused to gather his thoughts before moving toward you while maintaining his distance. His heart was pounding in his chest, and his hands were sweating profusely. He was never good at having deep conversations.
"I'm sorry for not telling you about the kissing booth. I did it to make you jealous, to see how far you would go for me. I know it's stupid—you don't have to tell me twice."
Your eyes caught his for just a moment before looking away.
Jungkook let out a sigh. "I'm also sorry about Jieun. I won’t try to explain it further because I should have said no to her. But I was on my way to see you before she arrived. I came to tell you how much I like you and how I'm afraid of being in a real relationship because I'm afraid I'll mess up. And getting to know you over the last few weeks has made me realize you're far too good for me. That you are deserving of better than anything I could ever offer. I understand if you don't want to be friends or see me again, but I felt you should know how I felt about you."
His doe eyes explored your face trying to figure out what you were thinking. "So, what now?"
You shrugged. "I don't know, Jungkook. This whole thing is a mess." He nodded. "Maybe we should just stay friends."
"You still want to hang out with me?"
"Not like how we used to. At least for a little bit."
You needed time to recover. To keep your distance from Jungkook. To regain your footing. Get in the right frame of mind because everything Jeon Jungkook has clouded your judgment.
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Everyone had final exams and presentations during the last week of school before the summer break. Fortunately, you only had one more exam before finishing your junior year.
It was a beautiful day to sit outside and study for your exam, so you did just that. You sat down beneath your favorite oak tree on campus, took out your world-lit book and notes, and flipped through your scribbled notes.
"Hey!"
You looked up to see Taehyung running over to you. Great, now what? You thought. "Hey," you replied, thinking you should be nice.
"Where are you headed for the summer?" he asked, inviting himself to sit next to you.
You found it odd because he's never struck up a conversation with you before. "I'm heading to my Aunt's in San Francisco," you said reluctantly, wondering where he was going with all of this.
"Cool."
You set down your book and notes, glaring at him." Why are you here, Taehyung?"
"Damn–a guy can't be curious? Sheesh–what's got your panties in a twist?" Taehyung cocked his brow.
You deadpanned, waiting for him to explain why he was talking to you.
"Okay–I'm here to talk about Jungkook."
You continued to stare blankly at him. You needed to understand what Jungkook had to do with anything. It's been a week since you last saw or spoke to him. You two agreed just to be friends and nothing else.
Taehyung cleared his throat, adjusting his position. "I need you to take him back."
"What? What do you mean?"
"He's been mopey and lovesick ever since you stopped dating. It's quite sickening to see it unfold in front of my eyes. All he can think about is how much he misses you, how much he misses hanging out with you, how much he misses this and that. He literally wears your hair tie as jewelry around his wrist. When you think about it, it's kind of creepy." For a brief moment, he looked off into the distance. "Anyway–all this to say is, for the love of god, please get back together with him. I can't stand him being like this anymore. I'm gonna fucking scream."
You couldn't help but chuckle at his request. It's strange how the tables have flipped. You were head over heels in love with Jungkook, and now you were the polar opposite. Granted, you were still trying to suppress your feelings for him, but hearing him be so lovesick over you made your heart skip a beat.
"He didn't tell you, did he?"
"Tell me what? That you guys were fake dating? He told me what went down after the kissing booth. I told him he was dumb for kissing all those girls if he really liked you, told him he should've just been honest with you from the get-go."
Wow–you definitely weren't expecting this conversation when Taehyung sat down next to you.
"Did Jungkook tell you to say all of this?"
Taehyung gave you a funny look. "What? No. I came here on my own accord. Just because I like to party and sleep around doesn't mean I don't care about my friends. Jungkook has always been there for me when I needed him, so I'm returning the favor. You can accept it as is or continue to make assumptions about my intentions."
"Sorry," you mumbled, "I hope you understand why I'm cautious about everything. But you understand why, right?"
"I get it. Jungkook hurt you by not being upfront about his feelings, but it's never too late to start over again."
"You're a good friend, Taehyung."
He flashed a boxy smile at you. "I know."
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Arriving back at your dorm after dinner, you couldn’t stop thinking about your conversation with Taehyung. Your heart wanted to forgive Jungkook right away, but your head told you to slow down because that's how you got into trouble in the first place.
Your room was empty due to you and Lyla’s things being packed up and stored for the summer. Laying on your bed, a ding from your phone went off.
Jungkook 9:27 PM Hey. When are you leaving?
You 9:28 PM I’m leaving tomorrow. My flight is at 2.
Jungkook 9:29 PM Is it okay if I talk to you tomorrow before you leave?
You 9:30 PM Yeah. Meet me outside of my hall. Around 10?
Jungkook 9:31 PM Great! I’ll see you then!
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The following morning, you woke up extra early to prepare for whatever Jungkook needed to talk to you about. You stood in front of the mirror, telling yourself, 'No' several times.
"What are you doing, weirdo?" Lyla asked as she came in, brushing past you to get her toothbrush.
"I'm hyping myself up to say no to Jungkook."
Lyla snickered, putting toothpaste on her toothbrush. "Uh-huh. Good luck with that, babe."
"You're very encouraging. Thanks," you said sarcastically.
She placed a kiss on your cheek before beginning to brush. "You're very welcome!"
You could see Jungkook waiting outside your hall's lobby as you walked through it. One thing you liked about him was that he was always on time. When you opened the door, it creaked loudly, alerting him to your presence.
Jungkook peered at you, sending a soft smile. "Hey."
"Hi," you answered with a thin smile, standing next to him.
"You look beautiful today."
Jungkook looked effortlessly good. He could never look bad if you were honest. He could wear a garbage bag, and you'd be on your knees. Today, however, he wore a blue and white windbreaker with a white tee and ripped jeans. You wished things had gone differently for the two of you.
You crossed your arms and mumbled, 'thank you,' curious why he wanted to talk. Perhaps he was trying one last time to convince you to be more than just friends. You'd think about it, but that was your heart, not your head. You knew better, and you'd been practicing saying one word, two letters, and 'no' all morning.
"You wanted to talk to me about something?"
"Yeah, um, I know we're just gonna be friends, and I'm totally cool with that,  but I was wondering if you'd mind if I texted you this summer? Not all the time, but occasionally, just to check in on you and stuff?"
Okay, you thought. This is progress. You could do this–texting. It was pretty harmless, right? And it'd only be once in a while. Because one thing was for sure, you didn't want to go all heart eyes for him so quickly.
"Yeah, I think that'd be okay." Jungkook beamed when you said okay. "And where will you be this summer?"
"I'll be at my uncle's in Seattle. Gonna spend time with him and my Aunt. You should come to visit." You let out a chuckle, and then Jungkook realized what he had asked of you. "Sorry–I'm getting ahead of myself there."
"'S okay," you said. You found Jungkook's eagerness adorable. "Anything else?" You were hoping that was the only thing because you feared the longer you were in his presence, the more you'd want to give in to him.
"I hope you have a good summer," he said, stuffing his hands into his jacket pockets and glancing at you.
"Thanks."
"I'll talk to you soon?"
You nodded, watching him walk away ahead of you. "Jungkook!" He turned around, his doe eyes wide open. It took everything you had not to say everything that was on your mind, but you had to bite your tongue. "Have a good summer."
His dimple was deeply etched into the softness of his cheek, and the corners of his mouth curved into a smile. He gave one last wave before departing.
When he was out of sight, you breathed a sigh of relief. Wanting to pat yourself on the back because you didn't let on more than you should. Your answers to his questions were short and concise, without hounding for more. Whew.
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~ One month later ~ 
Staying at your Aunt's was great. You loved San Francisco. It was a completely different vibe from southern California. The weather was breezy, the sun was always out, and there were many things to do in the Bay Area.
Halfway into the month and you hadn't heard anything from Jungkook. It's not like you were jumping at every notification when your phone buzzed, but he did say he would text you.
"Why do you keep looking at your phone?" Your Aunt Jo asked, peering at your screen.
You flipped your phone over to hide your lock screen. "I'm not," you countered.
"You're waiting on a boy, aren't you?"
Flashing a thin smile, you quipped back at her. "I'm not."
"He'll call you, don't worry so much. It always happens when you're least expecting it."
Your Aunt's had her fair share of men and women, and tonight was no different. The new guy she was seeing insisted on cooking for her.
"Aunt Jo–how do you meet these guys?" you asked, wanting to know her secret. The new guy, Jin, was young, tall, handsome, and a chef in town with a hot new restaurant.
"Friend of a friend," she said with a cheeky smile. "He's cute, isn't he?"
You couldn't help but give him a once-over. Those shoulders were big enough to land a plane. You shielded your mouth with your hand, whispering, "Super cute."
"Okay, ladies. Are you ready to try my famous dish?" Jin asked, bringing over two plates with seared scallops on a bed of quinoa, apple salad, and butternut squash puree. You'd never had anything this fancy before.
"Thank you, baby," Aunt Jo flirted at the handsome man, reaching for a kiss, which he reciprocated.
A ding from your phone resounded through the kitchen. You eagerly reached for it but stopped yourself.
"You're not gonna see if it's your boyfriend?" Aunt Jo teased before taking a bite of her scallop. She groaned at the heavenly taste.
It was going to bug you if you didn't check. You grabbed your phone and nothing but a measly email. You're not sure why you were getting so worked up. You were the one that told Jungkook you only wanted to be friends, but here you were, glued to your phone in case he texted.
You sighed, trying to get a grip. You had integrity and dignity, and you weren't going to break down just because a boy hadn't texted you.
So, instead, you opened up your camera, taking a picture of this beautiful dinner. Then just as Aunt Jo had said, another ding indicating a picture message was sent to you.
Clicking on the bubble, it was a message from Jungkook.
Jungkook 7:36 PM This corn dog isn't as good as the one we had at the pier.
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You 7:37 PM
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Jungkook 7:38 PM Where's the rest of the entree?!
You 7:39 PM wdym?? 😂 That's it!
Jungkook 7:40 PM You should demand to get your money back. You were scammed.
You 7:41 PM This is fine dining! My aunt's boyfriend made this. He's a chef at a place called Trestle.
Jungkook 7:41 PM Fine dining, hmm? You like that stuff?
You 7:42 PM Idk. Never really cared for the finer things in life.
Jungkook 7:43 PM I'm offended! What about me?
You 7:43 PM 😂 Are you trying to get me to compliment you?
Jungkook 7:44 PM 😎
You 7:45 PM 😒 You're okay-looking. You should see my aunt's boyfriend. He's mighty fine.
"Earth to my favorite niece in the whole wide world! Remember to eat! You've been smiling ever since you picked up your phone."
"Have not!" you protested.
"My Jin can attest to that. Can't you?"
"Jojo is right. You've been smiling like a creepy doll and have yet to try my food, and that's an insult to me," Jin teased.
"Let me take a picture of you." Jin turned to you, giving you a smolder and pouty lips. "Thanks!" you said, returning to your phone.
"Wait–wait! Jinnie, take your shirt off!" Jo cried as Jin turned back around.
"Aunt Jo!"
"If you're going to make this boy jealous, might as well do it right." Your aunt gave her boyfriend a pouty face and he willingly did what she asked. He tugged his shirt off, telling you to get his best side, which apparently was his back side. And well, you couldn't disagree. Jungkook would definitely be jealous of Jin's worldwide shoulders.
You 7:50 PM
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Jungkook 7:51 PM WHY ARE YOU SENDING ME NUDES OF OTHER MEN??
You 7:51 PM Blame my Aunt Jo. She suggested it. Anywho, time for dessert now. Byeee.
You have yet to hear back the rest of the night from Jungkook. It was good for you to be the first to end the conversation because, knowing you, you could text him all night, which would defeat the purpose of just being friends. You wanted to be cautious about becoming friends with him because it was all too easy to cross the line again.
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~ Two months later ~
Texts with Jungkook were simple, a little flirty, but nothing more than that. He'd send you random pictures of things he was doing or food he'd be eating, and you did the same. Harmless and cute. Distance from him was a good thing, keeping you from getting in trouble.
Your goal this summer was to explore new things to do and see in San Francisco. Your Aunt and Jin helped by giving you a bucket list.
On today's list was Alcatraz. You weren't a fan of boats, but it was the only way to get onto the island. The nice thing was you had a friend to accompany you on this trip. Yoongi made a surprise visit, checking out a doctorate program in the area. He mentioned wanting to check it when he was your TA, so you thought it'd be fun to explore with him.
Jungkook 1:11 PM Made it to the gum wall.
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You 1:20 PM 🤢 Don't get sick. Did you put one on there too?
Jungkook 1:21 PM 😎 Ofc I did. What's your view rn?
You 1:23 PM
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Jungkook 1:24 PM Fun. You have a visitor today?
You 1:30 PM Yeah, he's checking out another school here.
Jungkook 1:31 PM Cool. Have fun!
"Who's that? Lover boy?" Yoongi teased.
You glared, tucking your phone away in your back pocket. "I don't have a lover boy," you huffed at him.
"What happened with you two, anyway?"
You shrugged, not really wanting to go into detail about your whole ordeal with Jungkook. What happened, happened and now the two of you were just friends.
"Well, whatever happened, just don't be so hard on yourself. You both probably screwed up, and neither of you is perfect, so learn from it and move on," Yoongi said casually, moving on with the rest of the tour group.
Shaking your head, you chuckled at his words. He was never a man of many words but you appreciate him for caring about you.
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~ Three months later ~
You 10:27 AM
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What's good here?
Jungkook 10:30 AM
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What's good here? You're in Seattle? 🥲
You 10:32 AM YOU'RE IN SF?! 😩 This is like a missed connections ads lol
Jungkook 10:33 AM I guess this is what happens when all we do is send pictures, huh? 😅
You 10:34 AM Guess so lol
Jungkook 10:35 AM Have fun in Seattle.
You 10:36 AM Have fun in SF. I'll see you when we get back to school?
Jungkook 10:36 AM Definitely 💛
"What happened? You look sad," Aunt Jo mentioned when she saw the frown on your face.
"Oh, it's nothing," you stated with a wry smile, stuffing your phone in your bag. Today was not about you. It was about Jin.
"Were you expecting to see your boy while we were here?"
You rolled your eyes at her. No, you weren't expecting to see Jungkook because you assumed he'd be as busy as you were. Aunt Jo invited you to accompany her to Jin's new restaurant in Seattle, and you jumped at the chance. Okay, so you thought there was a chance you'd see Jungkook while in town. Unfortunately, luck was not on your side.
"I–no–I mean, maybe."
Aunt Jo stood before you, raising your chin and forcing you to look at her. "Sweetheart, it's okay to miss him or want to see him even though he hurt you. It's only natural, and you can't deny what your heart wants."
"Exactly–" Jin interrupted, "The heart wants what it wants," he said, kissing Aunt Jo's cheek from behind.
You debated if you should text him back, but what would it do? What would you even say? Hey, after thinking about it, I kind of wanna be more than friends? You were the one that initiated being friends again. What kind of person would you look like? Being super wishy-washy with your decisions. It was hard to keep your sense of worth when it came to Jeon Jungkook.
Throughout the rest of your trip to Seattle, you were good. You didn't text him besides when he would send you photos here and there of activities he was doing in San Francisco. You were proud of yourself for not giving in to your wants, and you stood your ground.
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Returning to San Francisco felt bittersweet because you assumed Jungkook had already left. You didn't want to ask where he was going next for fear of sounding nosy or needy. You'll just have to guess. Maybe he was already back in SoCal.
"Knock, knock," Aunt Jo said, holding your door open. "I know we just got back, but Jin invited us to a special event at his restaurant tonight. So get your cute little butt showered and dressed up, 'kay?"
You chuckled, shaking your head. "Free food? I'm there."
Aunt Jo whistled when you walked down the stairs in your outfit. The only semi-nice thing you packed was a black slip dress. Then you threw on a black leather jacket.
"You couldn't have chosen better shoes?" Aunt Jo asked, gawking at your pair of black and white checkered Vans.
"What? I wanted to be cute and comfy," you said, pulling the strap of your bag over your head, letting it drape across your body.
When the two of you arrived at the restaurant, you expected it to be packed, but it was completely empty. You got out of the Uber and waited for your Aunt to get out of the Uber. You turned around only to see her smiling like a lunatic.
"Aren't you coming?"
Jin called your name and waved you over as he exited the restaurant. You cast a glance in his direction, curious as to what was going on with them tonight.
"It's just you, sweetheart, have fun tonight!"
"We forgot to mention it's a private event for you," Jin grinned, sending you a wink. He stepped into the Uber, and then they were off, leaving you utterly confused on the sidewalk.
A high-pitched ding from your phone went off. Opening your bag, you checked your phone to see a text from Aunt Jo.
Aunt Jo 6:22 PM
Gonna stay at Jin's tonight.
Please be responsible. Love you.
Her text was cryptic and vague, leaving you even more puzzled. You sighed as you turned to face the restaurant and walked to the door. When you first walked in, the atmosphere was quite cute and quaint. Many tables had been cleared away, leaving one in the middle of the restaurant. Someone was sitting with their back to you, and when they heard the door close, they turned to see you standing there.
"Jungkook?"
He got up from his seat and walked over to you. He was dressed in his favorite color, black. A black open button down, tucked into black joggers, black combat boots, and finished with a thick silver chain. The biggest bunny smile you'd ever seen on him adorned his pretty face.
"What are you doing here? How–how did you–"
"I might have done some digging, called around, and got ahold of your Aunt's boyfriend."
Your jaw opened and closed, amazed by how sneaky everyone was–including Aunt Jo and Jin. "So you planned all of this?"
Jungkook shrugged. "I had some help from your Aunt. She's a pretty cool person. Jin too." You couldn't stop smiling, and your cheeks were beginning to ache as a result. "Do you want something to eat? Because I'm hungry, and the food smelled delicious while I waited, "He smiled.
You nodded in response to his question. He extended his hand, and you accepted it without hesitation. When your hand found his big warm ones again, your heart raced at a million beats per minute. He escorted you to the seat across from him, pulling out the chair and pushing it in while you sat.
You felt so flustered and scatterbrained you didn't even hear when Jungkook called your name. "Hmm?"
Jungkook chuckled. "How was Seattle? Did you like it?"
"I liked it a lot. It reminded me a lot of San Francisco. Minus the gloom," you giggled. You mentally kicked yourself when you realized you had just giggled in front of Jungkook. It was too hard not to get all excited over this. So you took a deep breath to ground yourself and remember that he is just a boy–a friend–nothing more.
A server greeted both of you, handing you the menu. Everything sounded so fancy, and for half of the items, you needed clarification on what they were. Nevertheless, it was free, so you'd try anything.
After placing your orders with the server, the pair of you couldn't stop smiling at each other like young teenagers in love. It was pretty nauseating if someone were watching the two of you.
"Ahem… you're growing out your hair," you said, finally breaking the weird smiling contest between you.
Jungkook touched the hair resting on the nape of his neck. "Yeah, I thought I'd try it and never had it this long before."
"I like it."
Your compliment made him look away, a sheepish smile plastered on his face, showing off his dimple.
The rest of dinner continued. You both groaned at how delicious everything tasted. It's no surprise that people enjoyed fine dining, but you didn't enjoy the cost. But one rule Jin lived by was that he would not charge people an arm and a leg just to eat good food. He thought it was ridiculous and vowed never to do it again when he owned his own restaurant. And you thought it was very honorable.
As the last course came out, you ordered the coconut custard while Jungkook got the chocolate cake, one of each, so you could enjoy the desserts instead of picking one.
"How is it?" Jungkook asked when you took a bite.
"It's good," you swallowed, "but it might be too coco-nutty for me."
Jungkook set his fork down after taking a bite of his cake. He pushed the small plate toward you. "Here, take mine. I'll eat it if you don't like it."
"Jungkook, we're supposed to share! I can't let you do that."
"It's fine! I don't mind, honestly!" He pushed the cake further to you while taking the custard away from you. You felt he wouldn't give up, so you let him have it.
After dinner, Jungkook insisted on taking an Uber with you to make sure you got back to your Aunt's okay, and then he'd take off to his hotel for the night. As the car arrived at Aunt Jo's, Jungkook followed after, walking you to the door.
You turned to Jungkook. "Thanks for dinner. It was a lot of fun."
Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck. "I didn't do much. It's all thanks to your Aunt and Jin for helping me set everything up."
"Yeah, I know, but you put a lot of thought into it too, and I really appreciate that."
He nervously toyed with his lip ring, letting it flip back and forth. "Um, well, I guess I should say goodnight, and I'll see you when we get back to school?"
Your eyes flickered to his. "Do you want to come in? My Aunt's gone for the night."
"Are...you sure?" Jungkook stammered.
"Yeah, we can watch a movie or talk."
"Uh, okay. Let me tell the driver. Be right back."
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The time was almost nine, so you opted for a nightcap. You grabbed a bottle of wine from Aunt Jo's cupboard and two glasses, setting it down on the coffee table before pouring one for you and Jungkook.
Jungkook quickly finished his glass which made you chuckle. Was he nervous? You didn't take him that type of guy.
"Why did you come to San Francisco?" you asked after taking a sip of your wine.
He chuckled. "Is it not obvious?"
You could take a stab at why he was doing this, but you needed him to say what he wanted.
"I'm shooting my shot," he said casually.
Trying to hold in a grin, you stopped it by devouring the rest of your wine glass.
Jungkook turned his full attention to you. "I couldn't stop thinking about you all summer–what you were doing if you were happy or sad, lonely. I wanted to call so many times, but I didn't know if I could. That's why I only sent texts since they were less intimidating."
"You could've called. I would've picked up."
"I know, but I didn't want to mess up being your friend 'cause I'm not good at this stuff, and I've never just been friends with a girl or even known how to date. But all I do know is you make me want to learn how to do all that stuff."
"To learn how to date or be my friend?
A beat passed before Jungkook answered, "Both, I guess? I just want to get to know you, so I wanna do whatever you wanna do. But that's if you want to..." he trailed off.
The buzz from the wine began warming up your cheeks, and the invisible walls you had up were starting to crumble. Jungkook's rosy lips looked too luscious not to want to try again. "I...really, really want to kiss you."
Jungkook gulped, unsure of what to do next. He didn't want to screw this up, but he also didn't want to pass up an opportunity to kiss you. His gaze shifted from your eyes to your cute nose, then to your lips. He lingered on your lips, trying to recall how they tasted. But it'd been far too long since he'd kissed you.
"I want to kiss you too, but I don't want you to regret it afterward."
You shook your head. "I won't." You shifted closer to Jungkook on the couch, your knee brushing up against his as you leaned in, waiting for him to do the same.
Jungkook brought his hand to cup your cheek, gazing into your eyes, wanting to confirm if this was really what you wanted. "Are you sure?"
"Positive," you said as you closed the gap and pressed your lips against his. His other hand cupped the opposite side of your face, drawing you closer to him. Your lips continued to explore each other softly and slowly as if time had stopped to allow you to discover what you had been missing.
You withdrew, only to find yourself straddling him. Jungkook's eyes widened as he realized the new position. However, he didn't mind it one bit. When his hands fell to grip your waist, urging you closer to him, your entire body buzzed. It didn't take long for Jungkook to become aroused by this heated make-out session, his cock twitching in his strained pants. You tangled your fingers in his hair, causing him to groan in your mouth while you smiled into his. Then your hand reached for the thick silver chain around his neck, gently pulling him as close as you could.
When he pulled away, you let out a quiet whimper. His lips began to trail wet kisses down your jawline, leaving soft purple bruises on your neck. His hands dragged up to your shoulders, where your dress's delicate straps lay. His fingers tinkered with them, debating whether to slide them down, so you decided for him. Your hand reached out to take the straps off, but Jungkook stopped you.
"Sorry, I'm sorry," Jungkook said breathily, nuzzling into the crook of your neck.
"No...No, you're good. I'm sorry. I got a little carried away."
Jungkook leaned against the couch, shifting himself from beneath, hoping to adjust the erection straining in his pants. "As I said, I'm fine with taking things slowly, I'm not in a hurry, and I'll wait as long as it takes if it means I get you in the end."
It took everything in you not to want to rip off your clothes and his right at this moment. But he was right because you didn't want to fuck this up, either.
"You just know the right things to say, huh?"
Jungkook laughed and nodded. He leaned forward, asking for a kiss. "It's getting late, and I still need to pack for my flight tomorrow."
You slid yourself off of him to a standing position, adjusting the strap, just begging to fall. "Let me get an Uber for you."
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The following day, Aunt Jo knocked on your door, asking if you were decent enough for her to come in. She covered her eyes as the door opened. "We good in here? No cute, naked boy in your bed?"
You laughed. "No, Aunt Jo. No naked boy in here."
"Darn," she teased, handing you a cup of coffee. "I'm surprised he didn't stay over."
To be honest, it would have been far too easy for you and Jungkook to fuck without first properly establishing what you two were. Again, you tried hard not to rush into things with him, but it was difficult not to.
"He was the one who stopped it from going any further, actually," you commented.
Aunt Jo took a sip of her coffee, nodding slowly, surprised at your words. "Interesting."
"Yeah...interesting."
"Well, at least you know he's trying to do things the right way this time, so that's gotta count for something?"
She was right. You'd wanted and hoped to do this thing with Jungkook correctly. Let's not fuck it up this time.
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Over the last couple weeks of summer break, you and Jungkook constantly texted, called, and video-chatted. You couldn't wait to get back on campus to see him again.
As you settled into your new apartment with Lyla, the boxes in your new room were piled high. You reached for a box on your tiptoes when you felt two hands snake around your waist and a kiss press against your shoulder. When you looked over, you saw a happy Jungkook wrapping his arms around you.
"Hi," he whispered into your ear before kissing your neck.
You mumbled a 'hi' before squirming away from his embrace, proceeding to finish your task before he rudely interrupted. Your hand reached into the box, holding onto the fairy lights you loved so much.
Jungkook sat on your bed, watching as you strung lights up on your wall. You crept on the bed, attempting to string the lights behind Jungkook, but he refused to move, so you crawled over him. When he suddenly leaned backward, pulling you on top of him, you yelped.
"Jungkook!" you cried, playfully hitting his chest, trying to break away from his hold, but he drew you back toward him for a kiss.
"One," Jungkook whispered, connecting his mouth to yours again. "Two."
"Why are you counting?"
He grinned from ear to ear. "Cause I owe you 100 kisses, remember?"
You rolled your eyes. "Forgot about that, and I paid good money for that, too," you laughed.
"Mm…I didn't," Jungkook pressed another kiss on your lips. "Three." He placed another on your jaw, causing your skin to burn hot underneath his lips. "Four."
"Jungkook," you whined, "I have so much to unpack."
"I'll help you later, but right now. I just wanna kiss you for a while."
You groaned. "Fine."
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Although your and Jungkook's relationship began in an unusual manner and had its share of ups and downs. You wouldn't have made the mistake of foolishly falling for someone other than him.
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levmada · 2 months
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hello! how are you? hope life's going well for you!
I have a little question.
so, as we all know, there has been a lot of speculation on whether Levi's a virgin or not.
and I've read your personality analysis of Levi (which, omg, bless you, I love) and his mental issues etc...
but here's my question, according to your analysis and your opinion, do you think he is a virgin or not?
also, there's that part where he says that he was "popular enough" with women...what do you think he meant by that? idk why, but I believe he meant...maybe (perhaps (perhaps)) he meant how closely knitted he was with Isabel and *maybe* petra?
and thank you to all the contribution you have made to us levussy worshippers 🫡
and by the way! I love your account!<3
hiii :D that’s so sweet😭😭😭🫶thank u for reading :’)) i’m also happy to answer this lol.
i’ll start with that dialogue!
the “popular with women” bit of dialogue isn’t quite translated correctly into english. it’s more like, when it has to do with men and women, the implication Zeke makes is romantic. the limits of the language - and probably whoever's in charge of PR - default romance to men and women. women isn't the literal term in the japanese dialogue.
but the question is attraction and not general popularity.
while you could argue that the implications of the conversation matter the most - so Levi (self-proclaimed) was popular in the romance scene - you must also consider that Levi had to say he was popular enough, or else he would be proving Zeke’s accusation right in that Levi doesn’t know other people’s feelings.
(although, he is popular to people behind the walls, but i’m getting off topic.)
proof of all that bc my summary is bad🫶
if Levi did seriously answer Zeke in that moment, just knowing Levi and his avoidance of relationships, especially romantic ones as far as is shown in AOT, he would’ve likely answered generally because he could, instead of feeding into Zeke’s attempt to fluster him lol. and of course he could've lied, again, so that Zeke couldn't get the satisfaction of being right or flustering him.
any way you cut it, i don’t think he had anyone in mind.
😅just to get it out of the way for those who don’t know i guess cuz it’s a popular piece of trivia, isayama has never confirmed whether Levi is a virgin.
sex is innately intimate. no matter if you’re just seeking momentary pleasure - which Levi doesn’t seem like the type to do - it’s both intimate and exposing. Levi just wouldn’t engage in casual sex.
especially in the underground and the negative associations he has with sex, mostly as it has to do with pain and suffering - very, very most likely, at least, and supported by what we’ve seen of the bad boy manga so far when some attackers threatened him as a child to make him “do what his mother did”. and Levi would never run the risk for disease.
(also assuming condoms exist.)
like i talked about in that analysis, trauma, in this case being exposed to sex at a young age, doesn’t simply go away, and also it exacerbates other things like distrust and an unwillingness to be vulnerable in romantic relationships.
so if it were to be someone, it would have to be someone Levi has a close bond with and trusts implicitly. someone who’s a Scout, then, but you also have to consider that romance just comes second on principle - at least to Levi whose top priority is always his duty.
his most selfish act after joining, this also being a show of affection, was letting Erwin rest (from his perspective), instead of forcing him back into hell.
so i mean - REALISTICALLY, IMO - for Levi it’s really not as simple as candlelit dinners and long walks on the beach ykwim?? there would be no love confession, only his actions which communicate his devotion or saying “”simple”” terms like “I trust you” or “I need for you not to die on me.”
sorry i’m getting so off topic.
ANYWAY. in my opinion, based on what info is allotted in canon, to me he is a virgin : )
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hi luv, i have a request
reader gets badly hurt by rafe or put in danger because of his addiction. that’s like her last straw and she tells rafe she cant be with him if he keeps using. he begs n pleads but reader needs space
over a few days rafe acts crazy, sending her messages n shit saying how he’s gonna make it right bc he “loves” her. reader ignores him for a bit and then once she is ready, goes over to his to talk to him abt the relationship. when she gets there though she overhears rafe talking shit about how reader is the bad person for leaving him + invalidating the severity of the danger he put her in + is literally high on coke while going on this rant
she tells him off, he doesn’t let her leave, idk abt the rest i just see a lot of angst and possessive rafe💌
Of Bullets and Wounds:
Warning: There are some intense, nonconsensual sexual themes in this story, also domestic abuse, and injury. MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY. MINORS DNI.
Thoughts and Opinions are Welcome
You didn't understand how you let things get this severe or allowed Rafe to push things as far as he did despite your reluctance.
You probably figured things always worked out and you would be fine.
Unfortunately, that kind of thinking had you keeled over in immeasurable pain and panic as you held on to your injured arm for dear life.
Due to some incident that Topper had with JJ, Rafe, and his little trio, and had recently stumbled upon a firearm, courtesy of Barry. You didn't understand what happened, but something told you Topper had started it.
You couldn't say that to Rafe because admitting the pogues were anything, but guilty would ruin his little fantasy of them being the bad guys.
He lured you out of the comfort of your room for a date night, and somehow you ended up at the beach with the dream team, high and impulsive while playfully handling a dangerous firearm.
You were tired, you had been tired for a while now, and at this point in your lives, you were wondering when Rafe was going to grow the fuck up.
You sat beside a makeshift bonfire as they tampered with the weapon, mostly Rafe, consistently telling them that this was a bad idea and that maybe they should put the gun away and go home.
In fact, your statement made Rafe a bit more rebellious, and he seemed to get a bit more reckless with it.
Shooting out rounds to the ocean, laughing and trying to reassure you. You weren't having fun, not that the night had been a gaggle of laughs, but when the pit of your stomach began to churn, you felt that you needed to get out of the situation as soon as possible.
Rafe noticed as you got up and began to gather your things, and in his hurry to stop you, a bullet shot off in your direction.
Rafe had shot you.
It wasn't on purpose, but you couldn't help but think you wouldn't be in this situation if he had listened to you from the beginning.
The pain was unbearable, and it was all you could focus on as he carried you to the jeep and had Topper drive you out to the hospital.
"Let me see," he says
"Don't touch me," you cringe on the other end of the backseat, doing your best to get as far away from him as possible.
"Baby, I'm so sorry, but please let me see it," he begs.
You desperately shake your head. "No,"
"Just let me fucking see it," he was no longer gentle, and as his patience wore thin, he grabbed your injured arm and taking a look at the wound.
"It hurts," you start hitting him, hoping it would get him to stop pulling on your arm.
But that makes him angrier, as he takes hold of your neck, threatening you with a squeeze. "Stay fucking still," he growls.
You stop, the fear in your belly was spreading to your chest. He goes into his back pocket and pulls out his phone, turning on the flash to get a better view of your injury.
"It looks like a graze," he says.
You take a peek at the open wound, the skin ripped open as blood seeped out, but it didn't look like a hole.
"You're gonna tell them we were playing around at the beach, and you fell on a bunch of rocks."
You're taken aback as the lie flows effortlessly through his lips.
Once you get to the hospital, you tell them precisely what Rafe told you, and you feel like an idiot. He was by your side the entire time, acting as moral support while you got your stitches.
Topper took you back to the beach to pick up Rafe's truck, and Rafe took you home.
Before he can turn off his truck, you let it all go.
"I don't think this is working," you stare at your hands to avoid looking him in the eyes.
"What?" his voice deep and clear. He must be off his high.
"I'm not saying it should be forever, but I think we should take a long break," if you were being honest, you'd been thinking about it for a while and didn't think you'd ever return.
"Y-"
Before he could finish his statement, you jumped out of the truck, rushing to your front door.
"Wait!" he shouts, grabbing your injured arm.
You let out a strangled cry, emphasizing your pain.
"Look, if it's about the whole gun thing, I said I was sorry."
He didn't get it, and frankly, you weren't surprised. Rafe was incapable of thinking about any perspectives outside of his own.
"It's not just the gun, Rafe. It's the fact that every time you get high, you find trouble, and somehow I get dragged along for the ride. It was fun when we first started dating, but now I'm scared and tired." you heave a heavy sigh getting everything off your chest.
"Look, I promise to be better, just don't do this," he whispers, sounding desperate.
"No, we can't be together if you're going to keep using and acting out like this."
"Please"
"We're adults now, Rafe," you open your door.
"Please don't do this to us," he tries to push his way in, and despite going up against his strength, you manage to hold your own.
"Look, I just need some space, I'll see you later,"
Despite the struggle, you lock the door before pushing your back against it.
"What the fuck."
You really didn't want to see Rafe ever again. The night at the beach put things into perspective as you considered him a future partner.
In conclusion, he was very unfit.
Unfortunately, Rafe didn't seem to understand the concept of 'space' since that night. Either that, or he didn't respect you enough to give it to you.
He was constantly messaging you with love bombs, and I'm sorry's, With the last message alluding to him making things right and you effectively having him blocked since.
But that didn't stop Rafe.
He delivered flowers and chocolates to your home, even getting your mother to talk to you about how good your relationship was and that you shouldn't destroy it over a little spat.
He clearly didn't tell her what happened, and you had half a mind to expose his sorry ass.
You let the situation stew for about two weeks before finally deciding to talk to him.
You unblock him and ask to meet up, and he responds by saying anytime and that you knew where to find him.
As you walk up the steps to his mansion, you hear someone making noise by the pool in the backyard and decide to check it out.
When you get closer, you hear your name on what sounds like Rafe's lips.
"She's being such a bitch about the whole thing. It was a fucking accident. She's acting like I held the gun to her fucking face and pulled the trigger on purpose,"
When you look over, he's moving back and forth on the pool's edge, gun in hand, with agitated movements. He was very animated with the occasional tick, and as soon as you heard him sniffle and go to wipe his nose, you knew he was still using.
This bastard and his audacity, before you could walk away, he spots you calling out your name and quickly hanging up with whoever he had on the line.
"What that was-" as soon as he grabs your arm, you push him off and decide to face the Devil.
"Fuck you, Rafe. You're gonna grow to be a miserable old man, stuck to this fucking island, except you won't have daddy's money to ease the pain."
You get in his face, anger slowly building in your chest as you get louder.
"What's worse is that you won't be a kook. No, you'll live on the cut just like the pogues you hate so fucking much, you miserable cokehead,"
You huff as you try to walk away, but he grabs your waist.
"Where the fuck are you going?" he says, irritation laced in his tone.
"I'm going home, let go," you try to push him off, but his hold gets tighter.
"You're not going anywhere,"
You feel a cold heavy metal pushed up against your neck, and still.
"That's my good girl," he says, pulling you into the house and throwing you on the couch, with the gun still in his hand and facing your direction.
"Rafe-"
"No, I gave you the space you needed, you're done, and you're coming back to me." he sits next to you, gun still pointed your way. "Babe, you don't understand just how much I need you in my life. You can't just walk away from me."
He tries to pull you into a kiss, and in the midst of you pushing him away, he clumsily drops the gun.
Feeling a chance come up, you rush for it, but Rafe is faster and stronger as he slams you against the couch.
Your lungs struggle to breathe at the impact, and he takes this opportunity to lift your skirt and rip off your thong.
Pushing his fingers deep into your cunt, roughly fondling you as you try to fight back.
"Rafe, Stop. Please,"
He chuckles as if he thought of something funny. He flips you over without so much of a struggle on his end.
You hear his movement as he adjusts his shorts to pull his cock out.
He massages your ass, giving it a harsh smack. "This is all mine," he gives it another one. "Don't you ever forget that,"
He pulls your cheeks apart as wide as you can handle, and you feel the head of his cock poking into your entrance.
He feels so much larger as your pussy stretches around him. A thought then occurs to you.
"Condom," you say
"Don't worry about that. I wanna be the only thing on your mind," he quickly forces the rest of his cock inside you.
All it takes is a few pumps for him to catch a rhythm, hovering over you as he rolls your clit between his fingers.
You were so wet and didn't understand why. But Rafe didn't care, his enjoyment of the situation evident as his grunts became rabid.
"Fuck" he says as he flips you around so that you're facing him. Pushing himself back into your body. Exhausted by the situation, you just let it happen and let your eyes close as you felt the sensations.
" Look at me," he says. "I wanna see your face when I cum inside you,"
Your eyes open at his suggestion.
"Rafe, no!" you put your hands against his pelvis as you try to push him off. He just grabs them and pulls them over your head as he fucked you with more vigor than before. His other hand plays with your clit as you're forced into an orgasm, toes curled and back arched, with him following close behind. Filling you with his seed, a creampie forms as you feel it leaking out.
"You're gonna be stuck with me forever, bitch."
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twsted-kinks · 8 months
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Ok hear me out! Idk why but I feel like Riddle has a collar kink or like sm with bdsm. He's literally always putting people in collars and GOD I wish it was me!
Can I get reader (w/ praise kink) /Riddle (who likes bdsm) I feel like it'd be really fun!
.
.
Also! Thank you for taking time out of your day (or night) to look at my horny thoughts! I appreciate it! Have a fabulous rest of your day!
>ageless and minors dni<
I usually see Riddle as submissive but the few times I can see him being dominant it's him role-playing and using his collars djsjdhd. I'm gonna include some other bdsm stuff I'm into mostly because I think spankings can be a reward as much as it can be a punishment but you never see it. So I'm gonna write it. Cause I like it.
Riddle x Reader/MC: Collared Rose (NSFW)
Established relationship, Dom Riddle Sub Reader, gender neutral reader (they/them), reader is Yuu
Content Warning: submissive reader/reader in subspace, spanking, praise, ambiguous oral sex, if I missed something let me know
The day is finally over. Two large exams, a mile run, putting out a fire started by Grim, all of it. Finally over. All Yuu wanted in this moment is to be with their boyfriend and just relax, no thinking. When Yuu enter their boyfriend's bedroom, Riddle greets them with a small smile that quickly turns into a worried expression when they flop onto his bed, not even bothering to take off their bag.
"Are you alright, my rose?" Riddle asks as he sets down his book.
"Yeah, just tired." Yuu grumbles into the bed sheets and then flips over. "Had a lot of big things today, but hey, I got it done. Thanks again for helpingme study. I don't think I got a 100, but I think I did decent enough to not bring my current grades down in those classes."
"And you should feel proud of that. For someone who knew nothing about this world earlier this year, you've made a lot of progress." Riddle stands, walks over to Yuu, and sits on the bed next to them.
Yuu sits up and leans against Riddle, resting their head on his shoulder. "I've been good today, right?"
"Yes." Riddle kisses the top of their hair. "You've done well."
"Can I... Can I get a reward?"
Riddle smiles. "Yes, you may. You've been very good, so you can choose. What would you like, my love?"
Yuu mumbles into his shoulder.
"Can you repeat that? I didn't hear you."
"I want the collar and riding crop."
"Alright, you go ahead and get undressed while I get the crop." Riddle kisses Yuu's head again before getting up.
Yuu quickly undresses, folding all of their clothes and setting them to the side, and crawls onto Riddle's bed. They sit on their knees and wait. After some time, Riddle walks back, crop in hand, and stands in front of Yuu.
"We'll be using the light system for safe words. Do you remember what each color means?" Riddle asks.
Yuu answers readily. "Green means all good. Yellow means caution and we need to check in. Red means stop everything."
"Good." Riddle reaches out and cups Yuu's face. "Are you ready, my rose?"
"Yes, my queen. Please, I- I've been good. Will you please reward me?"
"Of course." Riddle leans down, lips gently meeting Yuu's. He pulls away and whispers, "Off with her head."
In a short flash, a cold metal collar hangs on Yuu's neck. They bite their lip, trying to soften their moan, as their thighs press together.
"You've been so good. A wonderful example." Riddle kisses Yuu again. "Lean over the bed. I'll give you your reward."
Yuu eagerly shifts, moving their hips off the side of the bed with their feet to the floor. Riddle moves off of the bed and pauses, admiring the view in front of him. He reaches down and caresses the flesh of Yuu's ass, squeezing the soft fat.
"You're so beautiful." Riddle steps back and slaps the crop into his hand, making Yuu jump a bit at the sound. Slowly, Riddle runs the edge of the riding crop up along Yuu's thigh. "Perfect in your own imperfection." Riddle pauses as the end of the crop near's Yuu's core. Yuu's thighs squeeze together.
"Open your legs. I want to see all of you, all of my beautiful rose." Riddle commands.
Yuu does as they're told and is rewarded with a hard smack across their ass. They moan as their knees buckle.
"Was that hard enough?" Riddle asks.
"Yes- Fuck yes." Yuu begins to pant. "Green. So fucking green."
"Alright then. Count each one for me."
Riddle spanks Yuu again and again with the crop. Each time they moan, they squirm, as they try to count each hit. Their ass gets redder and redder, more and marks being added.
"R-Riddle, please."
"Ah? What are you meant to call me."
"My Queen."
"Good." Riddle carasses Yuu's ass again. "Now tell me what you want, my rose."
"May I cum, My Queen?"
"Of course, my rose." Riddle kneels down. "Spread yourself for me." Yuu does as they're told, reaching behind them and revealing their core even more. Riddle sees their hold pulse in anticipation, his breath already making them moan. Riddle leans in and kisses their hole before running his tongue along it. He groans as he dips his tongue into Yuu as his hand moves to Yuu's clit/cock and slowly begins to stroke it.
"Fuck, Riddle- My Queen. Faster, please!" Yuu moans as they push their hips back. Riddle complies, quickening his tongue and hand, as Yuu's breathing becomes more and more ragged. Yuu is practically humping his face as their legs shake below them. Finally, with a loud moan, Yuu's hole squeezes around Riddle's tongue as their clit/cock pulses in his fingers. Their fluids drench the bedding below them.
"Such a beautiful rose." Riddle pulls his face away before giving Yuu's hole another kiss. "My beautiful rose."
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It's so annoying to check the Haylor tag and see (mostly Gaylors and Larries) saying dumb shit like "did you even read the prologue of 1989?" Idk babe, did YOU? Because if you're still a Gaylor after that and the other multiple times she's said she's straight, an ally, and to stop shipping her with women then are you even truly a fan of hers? She was saying, in the nicest way possible, AGAIN that she is straight and tired of people shipping her with her FRIENDS. She dated Harry, so linking songs to him is not what she is talking about in the prologue. For the males, she was referring to her male FRIENDS - ie. Ed Sheeran and honestly I have no idea now who her other male friends are because she's kept them so secret but, I know she was also linked with Cory Moneith back in the day as well as Zac Efron who were clearly just friends with her.
The other thing I have seen is "you have no proof Haylor ever happened outside of 2012 besides their song lyrics". Yes, no shit. Did you hear Harry? I'm not even a huge Harry fan and even I know he specifically did an interview (maybe multiple) where he said lyrics/songs were "the best unspoken dialogue between people". Like, he gave you the proof right there. So if you can't put 2 + 2 together then idk what to tell you.
All of 1989 indicates a relationship that failed mostly due to the paparazzi/media influence. Firstly, I have no idea how anyone could ever link that to Dianna Agron when IF they had been in a relationship it was secret so it could not possibly have failed due to the media/paparazzi. I'm assuming those who believe this just do not get metaphors? Because in "I Know Places" she's not talking about hiding a queer relationship, she's talking about the paparazzi hounding her and Harry early into their relationship (he also talked about this and how at the time it was overwhelming for him and he hated it) - I know she also made comments about this back then as well - and she was trying to be his safe place and saying "I know places we can hide from them". The hunters with their guns are literally paparazzi with their cameras. Literally the entire song:
"It's a scene and we're out here in plain sight I can hear them whisper as we pass by It's a bad sign, bad sign Somethin' happens when everybody finds out See the vultures circlin', dark clouds Love's a fragile little flame, it could burn out It could burn out"
"Lights flash and we'll run for the fences Let them say what they want, we won't hear it Loose lips sink ships all the damn time Not this time"
"They take their shots, but we're bulletproof"
All of this is about a public relationship.
"Out Of The Woods" is referring to both the relationship "are we out of the bad parts of our relationship?" and "being out of the media's spotlight causing them issues".
"Wonderland" talking about flashing lights (paparazzi) and them getting lost away from it. Again, media and paparazzi and needing to run/hide from them.
"But there were strangers watchin' And whispers turned to talkin' And talking turned to screams, oh"
That's literally explaining people watching them then running wild in the media and it turned to them fighting.
Haylor was photographed quite a few times but, there were also tons of instances where they were together that was not reported by the media - but fans saw them out and about. So clearly she did know places they could hide from the media.
As for "Slut!" it literally ties in perfectly with every other 1989 song, so again - how is ANY of that about Dianna? She's saying "everyone wanted him that was my crime", aka I get called a slut because everyone wants him and hates me for having him. I'm sorry but, as pretty as Dianna is - she was never someone "everyone wanted". And if their relationship was a secret, then why would Taylor fear being called a slut and how "it'd be worth it for once"?
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