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beauty-and-passion · 7 months

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Selfishness v. Selflessness: Deceit’s reasons

And then, we finally reached the last episode of Sanders Sides.

Or what was the last official episode, until recently Mr. Sanders finally realized that hey, the Asides are following the main plot, maybe it’s time to consider them official episodes and not Asides.

And so, he changed the titles. If you check FWSA and DWIT now, you will find that their names are not followed by the title “Sanders Asides” anymore, but “Sanders Sides”.

While the infamous plushie episode which angered everyone because it was nothing more than an ad, magically became and Aside episode:

What can I say? Better late than ever, Mr. Sanders. This wouldn’t have happened at all if you planned everything from the start, you know that, right?

Oh, and in case you haven’t noticed: maybe you should also take FWSA and DWIT away from the Sanders Asides playlist. You know, just to keep it organized.

But let’s come back to Selfishness v. Selflessness: this was the first episode I ever wrote about - even if at the time it wasn’t a full analysis, but rather just some random, scattered thoughts. And they weren’t enough, because there is still a lot of stuff to talk about! Hence why, this post was needed.

This post will clarify a couple things I previously talked about, starting from the whole Wroammin thing which (sadly) turned out to be wrong. It can even be considered part of a triptych: THIS is the first part, THIS is the second one and the post you’re reading is the third and final part. Hope you will enjoy it and, as always, if you have anything else to add feel free to do it.

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Why did Deceit appear?

[Logan]: -pops up- Eh... Speaking for someone is a disagreeable practice, Patton. If Thomas would rather go to the wedding, then I, the brilliant Logan, think we should hear it straight from the horse's mouth. Thomas, the floor is yours. Wedding or callback?

My gosh, this man isn’t even trying. First, he drops a character lie (“I, the brilliant Logan”) which is the exact same kind of lie he used the first time. Then he uses two idioms in a row. And scolds Patton in the meantime (“Speaking for someone is a disagreeable practice, Patton”).

I suppose he just wanted to appear, but he couldn’t do it without being ✨ dramatique ✨

But now your question could be: why did he appear? Well, as I anticipated in the analysis of CLBG, Mr. Sanders explained in a tweet that Character!Thomas’ relationship with Lee and Mary Lee is as strong as the one with Joan. Once again, a very strong relationship is at risk. And, this time, there’s also an event that might bring a major change in Thomas’ life. Everything basically requested Deceit’s presence.

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The dark sides are all anime tsundere girls

[Deceit]: Virgil's very right. You can't trust me! It's not like I'm trying to look out for you or anything.

[Anxiety]: He thinks he’s so great. Well, he is not! Look, I’m just trying to look out for him. (Taking on ANXIETY)

Okay, jeez, fine, you definitely don’t know each other and you’re definitely not father and son. That’s all a huge coincidence, I surely believe that.

Now I can’t wait to see Orange saying: “it’s not like I’m looking out for you, baka!” to Thomas, then I can close everything and disappear forever 😂

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“He's against Nazis”

[Thomas]: ... Alright, he can stay. [Patton]: Hm? [Roman]: -incredulous laughter- Ah, wait, seriously? [Thomas]: Sounds like he's against Nazis, so... Why not hear him out? You know? [Virgil]: That... cannot be where the bar is!

I just love this part too much and it cracks me up everything. Remember, kids: you can be a snek, but if you’re against nazis, then everything is okay. I can’t wait for the moment Thomas will try to send Remus and Orange away, only for them to reply that, hey, they’re against Nazis too, so they deserve to stay! And Thomas will let them stay.

And then we will reach the lowest bar in the world and everything will be perfect.

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“Social engagement”

[Deceit]: Well, the bar for skipping an important opportunity should be higher than a... social engagement. [Patton]: Come on, a wedding is more than just a social engagement! [Virgil]: He knows that.

Of course he knows that, he bears the name of a god who presides over weddings. Which yes, it’s hilarious and I love it.

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Same area of expertise

[Patton]: What is this wacky talk? I- You don't mean any of this. I'm your morality, I wouldn't be here if you did! [Thomas]: Right, right. Yeah, you're right. I- I don't mean that. [Patton]: And Roman, I thought you fought for honor! Why are you pushing Thomas to be dishonest?

Deceit knows what Thomas truly wants and it’s to go to the wedding. However, two sentences from Patton were enough to make him understand that:

Patton is the one who is truly in charge

Patton’s ideas are strong enough to influence Thomas

Thomas could change his mind because of them

Roman desperately wants to go to the wedding

Roman could change his mind because of Patton

And so, Deceit intervenes and makes Patton aware of something: sure his presence means Thomas still thinks about his morals… but he’s not the only one here:

[Deceit]: Do you know who else is here? Me! So perhaps, Thomas... isn't so innocent. [Patton]: Well... Nobody's perfect... Except for Thomas! He loves his friends! [Deceit]: You can defend him all you like... But you can't change the facts. Is Thomas an innocent little lamb? Let's let them be the judge of that.

And with this, Deceit:

proved he’s Thomas’ Side and not a random guy. He is a Side, just like all of them and he won’t go anywhere.

brought up the problem that will be solved in POF - i.e. Patton’s view of Thomas as a perfect, innocent boy.

moved the entire problem to a higher, moral level. This isn’t just a “choosing wedding or callback” problem anymore: this is Deceit’s way to prove Thomas’ fallibility and humanity.

And he wants to prove it to Patton. And if Thomas is confused about all of this, Patton is not:

[Thomas]: Um, I'm a little confused as to what this is all about. [Patton]: Basically, Deceit is trying to prove that you care more about yourself than your friends, but don't worry, kiddo, we'll show him.

Again: the supposedly stupid guy immediately understood what Deceit was trying to prove and followed him in his reasoning. Because, in case it wasn’t clear enough, these two work in the same area of expertise.

And if you need another confirmation that these two are a lot more similar than it seems:

[Deceit]: He's clearly manipulating the witness into doing what he thinks is best. Wait a minute. Who was it that was called a Scooby-Doo villain for doing the exact same thing? Oh, yeah! It was me... disguised as Patton.

So not only Deceit confirmed Patton isn’t perfect, but they are similar enough, he can do what Patton does and there would be no difference.

These two work in the same field and they’ve been hinting it here all the time, before clearly stating it in POF.

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Multiple arms

I forgot about this detail and thought that the multiple arms thing Remus brought up was a metaphor. Well… maybe it wasn’t. Maybe the noodle snek really has six arms.

This goddamn man, he really has one arm for each Side. And he probably uses them to smack the Sides in the head/stop them from doing something stupid. I love him.

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An attempt at maturity

[Thomas]: And that's what you stand for. Truth. [Patton]: But I don't know what's true at this point. I just know what I want to be true. I want to believe you're an honest person... but... Deceit's right! He's here... and that means something. [Thomas]: Are you serious? I- I've been following your lead this whole time. I'm in the dark here, Patton, and I need something to light my way! [Patton]: I'm sorry... b-but... I don't know the way. [Thomas]: I don't want to be a bad person. [Patton]: Okay, then I'll do whatever I can to make sure you're not.

Do you know what is this? This is the moment that led to POF.

Patton was getting Deceit’s message. He was starting to understand Thomas isn’t perfect. He even admitted he didn’t know the answer.

But Thomas was too scared, too afraid of being seen as a bad person. And so, Patton had a choice: to side with Deceit, accept that his morals have been too extreme and guide Thomas by giving him a more mature, multifaceted understanding… or doing POF:

[Patton]: Like I told you before, sometimes... I don't know the way. But... When I told you that, you were so scared. I couldn't bear it. So I said to myself... "Alright, Patton. Thomas needs you. You're responsible for his morality. You can never not have an answer for him." And then I promised you I'd keep fighting. Unfortunately... I learned the hard way that... giving too simple of answers to complicated questions... can do more harm than good.

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Virgil’s interrogation

[Deceit]: -chuckles- Very well. As Thomas' anxiety, do you have any relevant information about his norepinephrine levels in regards to these two conflicting commitments?

I’m pretty sure someone already said something about this hormone back when the episode came out, but I don’t remember - also, I found this very interesting paragraph from Wikipedia I would like to share:

“The general function of norepinephrine is to mobilize the brain and body for action. Norepinephrine release is lowest during sleep, rises during wakefulness, and reaches much higher levels during situations of stress or danger, in the so-called fight-or-flight response. In the brain, norepinephrine increases arousal and alertness, promotes vigilance, enhances formation and retrieval of memory, and focuses attention; it also increases restlessness and anxiety.”

As you can see, Virgil’s two main functions are both involved in this hormone. And norepinephrine has a spike during stressful situations - like, you know, choosing between a callback or a wedding.

But the mention of this particular hormone implies something else. Something very important, that will connect with the second part of this conversation.

Deceit mentioned an incredibly specific hormone and, by doing that, he proved how well he knows Virgil. He doesn’t know just his roles, but even the effects he has on a chemical level. It’s a bit like the difference between knowing your colleague from their job and knowing how many miles they can run on the weekends. It implies a much closer relationship.

Also, since he asked how high the levels of norepinephrine are, that means he knows Virgil is stressed. He knows this situation makes him more anxious and, with his questions, he wants to prove to Virgil (and to everyone else) that he is anxious because he knows what Thomas wants: to skip the wedding and go to the callback.

[Virgil]: I think it's ridiculous that anyone is entertaining any of this. Guys, he's a liar. You literally know him as Deceit. [Deceit]: Glass houses, Virgil. You yourself said that you are not a beacon of truth.

The famous “You literally know him as Deceit” line is a clear reply to Deceit’s question about norepinephrine. It’s Virgil’s way to say that yes, he knows him extremely well too. The others “know him as Deceit”, but he knows Deceit for who he is.

And, okay, now that’s probably me looking too much into things again, but the way Deceit replied by saying that he’s not always right and shaking his finger… it’s almost like a warning. A (maybe unconscious) way to say to Virgil to not reveal more, because he’s not always right.

And to further prove his point, he proceeds with a subtle threat:

[Deceit]: Oh, so you've never been reluctant to share anything with the group, then? [Virgil]: Don't. [Deceit]: What? I just meant your name. [Virgil]: Don't! [Deceit]: Maybe that's why it's so easy for you to recognize me for what I am. Like I said before... it takes a liar to know a liar.

And with that, Deceit proved to Virgil that:

He knows what he’s hiding from the group (i.e. that he was one of the Others)

He knows him extremely well, because he knows Virgil doesn’t want to talk about it yet

He has the upper hand, because if Virgil says something, he can immediately drop his secret and screw Virgil’s position in Thomas’ eyes.

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An unexpected help

So, after threatening his son and showing how much of a villain Deceit can be, what does Patton do?

He pushes him to show his soft side, by forcing him to reveal his agenda.

[Patton]: You... always seem to have some... bigger plan. Some... agenda. [Deceit]: Doesn't everyone? [Patton]: Well, not everyone is so secretive... about theirs. [Deceit]: Everything has a purpose, and sometimes fulfilling your purpose requires keeping things close to the chest. [Patton]: Well, you're under oath, which I think means you gotta tell us. Why the courtroom scenario? Why pick a setting where... uh, the truth comes to hang out?

As soon as Patton had the chance to ask him a question, he immediately ignored the wedding/callback thing and went straight to the point. And it makes sense, because the point of their conversation is a bit more important than a single choice.

Patton wants to know what this Side is trying to do. And when Deceit brought the conversation to a higher level by talking about society, Patton brought him back to the main topic: Thomas. What does Deceit want to do with Thomas?

And by forcing him to be a little more honest, Patton helped him. He helped Deceit to drop some of his convoluted plans, to clearly say he cares about Thomas.

[Patton]: Okay... What does any of this have to do with Thomas? [Deceit]: I don't want Thomas to be disadvantaged in a world where you can die for not following the laws made in the name of a lie.

That’s why I always say Patton is incredibly mature. He’s working against Deceit, they are literally against each other in this courtroom scenario… and yet, he helped him. He gave him a chance to show his soft side, to prove he’s not a bad guy. And to tell how useful he can be! A bit like “an inner coach that acts with the intention of self-preservation”, as Patton said in CLBG.

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Always and forever on Thomas' side

[Deceit]: Look, the point is, Thomas is an unconscious egoist and this dilemma is actually between something that serves him versus something else that serves him. Between looking and feeling like a good friend and a dream come true. If Thomas wanted to be seen as a good friend more than he wanted the role of a lifetime, well then I'm all for that. But I just don't buy it.

This part is extremely interesting, because Deceit said both choices are something Thomas wants. From one side, there’s personal gratification (Thomas wanting to be a good friend), from the other there’s personal fulfillment (Thomas doing something he loves). They are both selfish wants, in a way. So, if all Deceit cared about were selfish wants, he would have no problem with them. This whole courtroom scenario wouldn’t take place at all.

Be he has a problem because he wants what Thomas wants. And since Thomas is denying his want to do a different thing… well, that required Deceit’s intervention. As he said: if Thomas wanted to go to the wedding, he would’ve accepted that choice. He doesn’t care about Lee’s feelings, just like he didn’t care about Joan’s feelings in CLBG. The only feelings that matter for Deceit are Thomas’.

And only when Thomas finally admits his want, Deceit is satisfied.

[Thomas]: Fine! I want to go to the callback! I was planning on playing Word Crush on my phone during the wedding ceremony to keep my mind off the fact that I'm single. I don't want to go! I'm afraid to go. And on top of that, a dream come true fell into my lap scheduled on the same day. Anyone would want to go to the callback! So, yeah. I tried to force myself to forget about the wedding, and now I want to lie to my friends, so they don't hate me for not supporting them. I'm a liar. I'm a liar.

Deceit put on a whole courtroom, just to force Thomas to be more honest. This alone would be enough to prove he’s not just the embodiment of lies, but I suppose the correlation “snek = liar” was stronger than 200 proofs, so Roman did the wrong thing and made a choice no one wanted.

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A mature Side

[Roman]: It's my sworn duty to help Thomas achieve his hopes and dreams. But Thomas wouldn't dream of attaining his hopes through deceitful means. [Deceit]: But that's not true! [Virgil]: And you're a beacon of truth? [Deceit]: Oh, did I say that? I missed the part where I said that.

Please let’s focus on Deceit’s words because they are very, very interesting.

1) Deceit openly admitted his means weren’t deceitful. Just like when he asked Thomas, during the courtroom if he was “the snake come to trick you into sinning, or have you had your mind made up since the moment you received the news about the callback?”. Deceit had no intention of deceiving Thomas, from the first moment he appeared.

2) Deceit is a very mature Side. I talked about it during my POF analysis part 3, when he openly recognized his own mistakes. Here he openly admits what Thomas is having trouble admitting: that he’s not perfect. He never said he was. He never pretended to carry the truth. Even if he’s 100% right here, he still admits he’s flawed. He and Patton are truly the most mature Sides here.

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Caring and criminal

During the episode, he said that “fulfilling your purpose requires keeping things close to the chest”. And where did he keep his logo? On his chest. Even better, on his heart. What else does he have to do, to prove how deeply he loves and cares about Thomas? This man is the most caring Side.

[Deceit]: I'm not going anywhere. And there are smarter ways to get people to do what you want, anyway.

Uh, so “smarter ways to get people to do what you want” means “let’s release Remus”?

You know what? That really was a smarter way. With one decision, he introduced Remus, proved he’s harmless and even useful, showed Thomas that ignoring his needs leads to an increment of his intrusive thoughts and confirmed that he was right and Thomas should’ve listened to him.

This man is a criminal and I love him.

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Why Logan can’t work in the moral area

[Logan]: It's still difficult to believe that my participation was as restricted as it was. It was Deceit's doing, I'm sure. I would have been a more than worthy foil. Unlike him, I'm skeptical about whether a society could function without some sort of system of laws by which all of its citizens abide.

Oh Logan, you huge nerd. I love you, but this is why you don’t work in Deceit’s and Patton’s same area of expertise.

Deceit’s whole monologue about society wasn’t practical, but moral. He didn’t say “we should surrender to anarchy”, nor presented a point about why rules are bad: he said society is a concept and we all collectively choose to believe this concept was true. He talked about how scary the concept of society is. And he clearly saw it on a moral level, not a practical one.

And yes, we can add this to the list of reasons why Logan was pushed in the back: just imagine if, instead of talking with Patton, the other moral side, who was incredibly quick to get his points and ask him about his agenda, we got Logan: a neutral Side, more interested to practical things than metaphorical/moral ones. Deceit would’ve spent most of the time rephrasing everything and the conversation would’ve been just about this choice, rather than a multilayered conversation about selfishness, selflessness, Thomas’ fallibility, and choices in general.

Deceit needed Patton as interlocutor and he needed to remove the cold, straight logic from a conversation that was mostly about morals and emotions: two areas Logan is not an expert about - as he will admit in POF.

[Logan]: Well, determining what feels right or wrong for you isn't really my area of expertise.

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Truly taking care aka the wedding from Lee and Mary Lee’s perspective

[Patton]: Well, here's the thing, kiddo. People hurt all the time. By going to the wedding, you're making sure that two of your friends aren't hurt by the absence of someone they really care about.

Okay, time to put the most cynical part of me here.

Patton’s words are cute and nice and everything… but seriously. Come on.

Just imagine being the bride or the groom: you spent the previous days, weeks and months organizing for this event. Locations, entertainment, ceremony and everything. Then the day comes and you want to be 200% sure everything goes as smoothly as planned. You have people coming to ask you about this or that detail. You have to be sure your dress/make-up is okay, your best men/bridesmaids are okay, the photograph is here, the meal is good, the place is ready, the staff is preparared.

And, when it’s time, you have the ceremony, the people to greet, photos to take, meals, events, dances and so on.

Do you really, REALLY think that Lee and Mary Lee would be so devastated by Thomas’ absence? I’ve never been married, but I really doubt that one missing guest (and not a best man or a bridesmaid or another important guest: just a guest) would have made them feel so devastated. Weddings are huge, stressful events, a ton of things happen and the newlyweds barely have time to eat, let alone feel devastated by a missing guest.

And I would like to repeat that: a guest. Thomas didn’t play any important role. He wasn’t supposed to be Lee’s best man or anything else. He was just a guest.

Do you know what it would’ve happened, if Thomas skipped the wedding? That Lee and Mary Lee would’ve thought “Oh, Thomas didn’t come”, to completely forget about it two seconds later, because someone else would’ve called them to do something else.

And no, going anyway isn’t a question of empathy, but of naiveness - and egoism too. Thomas himself proved it in POF, when he showed his frustration, because he wanted a little more than a “hello”. He literally wanted them to throw him a party, just for coming! Who would ever think the newlyweds would give a damn about them, on such a huge day? No one, except for a very egoistical, naive person: egoistical enough to think they are the only one who matters, naive enough to think the bride and the groom have time to do a party for them. That’s childish, immature and very selfish, not empathetic.

Do you want to know what Character!Thomas could’ve done, if he wanted to show some empathy? Skip the wedding.

Think about it. What would’ve been better? Thomas moping around and not enjoying himself, thus ruining the party for everyone else… or Thomas not appearing at all and letting everyone enjoy the party? Which choice is the most empathetic? Call me a bad person, but I think the second one would’ve been a better way to care about other people’s feelings.

Also because Lee and Mary Lee noticed it:

[Lee]: Really? 'Cause you're sitting alone at the reception.

And, at least to me, that’s way worse than not attending it at all. Thomas was such a buzz kill, he ruined the party for the bridal couple too. That’s literally the most selfish, bad thing he could’ve done. And only because he didn’t want to listen to the snake boy.

This event deserved to leave strong consequences. And POF is proof of how huge the impact was on Thomas’ life and how deeply things will change from now on.

( Support me on Ko-fi )

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silence-between-seconds · 2 months

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Hey there, love

I'm Sirius and this is my attempt at an intro post. anyway, you can call me siri ;)

pick any pronouns from: he/she/they || I'm genderfluid || INFJ

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Sooooooo, if you wanna know, here it goes

Gonna tell you there's a part of me that shows, if we're close

Gonna let you see everything

But remember that you asked for it

I'll try to do my best to impress,

But it's easier to let you take a guess at the rest

But you wanna hear what lives in my brain and my heart

Well, you asked for it

For your perusin', at times confusin'

Hopefully amusin', introducing me<3

I've never

really been into cars,

I like really cool guitars and superheroes

And checks with lots of zeros on 'em

I love the sound of violins

And makin' someone smile

(yes I just inserted a disney song to introduce myself. go listen to it if you want it's called Introducing Me by nick jonas)

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my life motto is "do no harm but take no shit". That's right, I have my wise moments.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

I'd say this mood board just about sums up my personality, except, as all humans are, I'm obviously more complex than that.

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@her-midas-touch is a poet and wrote this for me hehe:

Run out of metaphors great enough, my fingers paint a wraith

To faint to capture essence, mere shimmery traces of feelings

Every cheshire cat smile, every whirlwind idea, every leap of faith for every apathetic eye, missing the moment, is a soul

that sings

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩💐

click here for the playlist on Spotify by my lovely siv @good-oldfashioned-lover about what my soul is supposedly made of.

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩💐

this is my ao3 acc feel free to check it out

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩💐

feel free to interact<3 promise to advice/ listen if you wanna vent/ hyperfixations

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩💐

lovely mutuals:

@good-oldfashioned-lover@her-midas-touch@daydream-of-a-wallflower@hermioneswifeee@literallytoogaytofunction@lilbeanz@reisbackinblack@dementorfromazkaban@deprivedofbraincellsandsleep@starryrain@lizluvscupcakes@urbanflorals @accio-sriracha@siriusly-remu@werewolfenthusiast@none-of-it-was-accidental@feelin-sad-and-gay@jaylienpotter@illustratinglaura @nothingtoseeherebyeexx @silverscreenlipstick@moonysversion @mochamis-blog @sleepinginmygrave @icarus-last-fall @a-beautiful-fool @shuhuaspookie @xi-phos @here-for-a-good-time-hopefully @stars-over-ice-cream @kaaaaaaarf @re-is-back-in-black @rookofthekingom @toxik-angel @marylily-my-beloved

(i hope i got everyone?)

mess with my friends and I will hurt you :)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Things I love:

singing, marauders era, any and all kinds of art, poetry, books, fanfiction, the harry potter fandom (jkr can piss off tho), arctic monkeys, k-pop (bts, txt, svt, skz, treasure and a few more bands), renne rapp, taylor swift's music, conan gray, Marvel, plushies, the moon, the stars, basically space, chai, biking, CHOCOLATE, nature, writing, badminton, musical instruments and a million little nothings

currently listening to: space girl by Frances Forever

fav authors/books: ruskin bond, the alchemist, ronald dahl, to kill a mockingbird, memoirs of sherlock holmes, and many more im too lazy to type out. ok look i love reading but the last thing i read was definitely on ao3

movies/shows: Heartstopper, Red white and royal blue, Loki, hazbin hotel, helluva boss, Night at the Museum, highschool musical (2 is my fav), Luca (2021) and most other pixar and disney movies, (i love animated movies so much)

bollywood has only managed to make a select few good movies out of which im absolutely crazy about znmd, dangal and super 30

feel free to suggest any others to me

DNIs don't work so I guess I'll just say: fuck around and find out :)

this video made by the wonderful @urbanflorals is so me, i wanted to add it<3

alright ty for visiting my blog, you are welcome to stay

Toodles<3

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naminethewriter · 10 days

Text

On the Road, Just the Two of Us

Chapter Three: At a Gas Station, Just the Two of Us (well, not really)

Masterpost | First | Previous | Next | Ao3

Summary: This was written for @dukeceit-week-2024, @dukeceitweek

Janus and Remus are living in a campervan at the moment. Are they going somewhere? Who knows. The only thing that’s important is that they’re together.

Content Warnings: Innuendos, Heavy Flirting, mention of rats

🌻🌻🌻🌻

“This place is filthy,” Janus commented as they pulled into the gas station. Remus hummed in agreement.

“Well, we don’t really have much choice, I think. There’s probably not another one for miles.”

“Most likely. I’ll just remain in the car then.”

“Fine by me. Though, you’re sure you don’t wanna go to the toilet?”

“I’m pretty sure it’s more sanitary to go in the bushes that on what that tragedy probably looks like.” Janus frowned at the building, the windows of which look like they haven’t been cleaned in years.

“So, I can’t convince you to have a quicky in the bathroom?”

“Not unless you’re willing to clean it with bleach and disinfect everything like three times.”

“Was worth a shot,” Remus shrugged and climbed out of the driver seat. Janus watched him as he filled up their tank and then disappeared inside to pay. He then waved at Janus as he rounded the building to go to the toilet. Janus’ nose scrunched automatically at just the thought of what they must look and smell like. He’ll have to make Remus disinfect his hands in eyeshot before letting him back into the van.

Remus would pout at him for at least an hour after, but he could handle that.

Except, he didn’t.

When Remus did come back to the van and Janus wordlessly held out the disinfection spray, his boyfriend rolled his eyes once but otherwise complied without complaining. Janus was so shocked that he didn’t get a word out until they had pulled out of the gas station and back onto the road.

When he came back to himself, Remus was humming along to the playlist, simply focused on the road and otherwise completely still.

He was very rarely that docile.

Janus narrowed his eyes at him.

“What happened?”

“Hm?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, Remus, something happened on that toilet. You’re way too happy for just having taken a dump.”

His boyfriend snorted – because of course he did, he had the humor of a twelve-year-old.

“You sure you wanna know? You’re not gonna like it.”

“You’re actually completely focused on the road without me having to jump through hoops to entertain you, of course I want to know who or what my savior is.”

“I love you,” Remus sighed, completely serious. “Your snark is so hot.”

“I love you, too. Now answer me.”

“There was a rat running around the restroom. It was super cute and barely scared of me! Even let me take pictures! Though it ran away when I tried to pet it.”

Janus gagged and Remus snorted.

“Told you you weren’t gonna like it.”

“I’m just glad it ran away and didn’t bite you. And it’s nice to know that I made the right decision by not taking a step out of this car at that disgusting place.”

“Yeah, I know I shouldn’t’ve tried to touch it… My shitty impulse control really had me this time.”

“The rat is definitely wiser than you.”

“They’re so fucking smart, Jan. Do you know how fucking smart they are? Like super fucking smart.”

“Yes, dear, I know,” Janus chuckled. “You’ve given me several ted talks and shown me plenty of videos. Still, you shouldn’t try to touch street rats. Only the domesticated ones.”

“Uhhhh, I’d love to have a pet rat! Would have since I was a child but Roman convinced me that it was a bad idea to ask for one because mom absolutely hates rodents. Convinced her to get us that hamster though.”

“Ah, yes, I remember you telling me about that. Sacagawea, wasn’t it? You and Roman went to play with her in the garden and lost her?”

“Yep, that’s the one! After that mom decided we weren’t ready for pets.”

“I wouldn’t mind having a pet rat.”

Remus hit the breaks a bit too hard. Thankfully, they were still in the middle of nowhere without any other car around.

“You wouldn’t?!” Remus asked, excitedly.

“I wouldn’t. As I said, you’ve spoken about them so much, I couldn’t help getting a bit endeared with them as well. They can be really cute. When they’re domesticated and properly trained.” He added that last part when Remus seemed to be about to turn the van around to get back to that gas station and retrieve the encountered rat.

“Fine. A boring, domesticated rat then. But we’re getting one!”

“Not directly after we get back, but I’m open to it in the future, alright, darling?”

“More than alright! I could kiss you until the sun goes up tomorrow! Actually, that’s an idea…” His tone shifted in one Janus knew very well, and he rolled his eyes.

“No way, dear. We can kiss for a bit; you’ve already brought us to a stop anyway. But if you wanna take my clothes off, you’ll have to wait until the sun has gone down first.”

“And then we can go until sunrise?”

“Depends on where we end up.”

Remus whooped loudly, before turning off the van for now and pulling Janus into a bruising kiss.

There was nowhere he’d rather be.

#namiswriting #On the Road Just the Two of Us #Chapter 3: At a Gas Station Just the Two of Us (well not really)#dukeceitweek2024 #Day 3: Rats #dukeceit #ts janus #janus sanders #ts remus #remus sanders #human au #fluff #innuendo #heavy flirting #mention of rats #multichapter fic #sanders sides #fanfiction #reblogs are appreciated

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kaaaaaaarf · 3 months

Text

🌕Playlists🌑

Here is a comprehensive list of all the playlists from my Spotify account.

My Fics

The Killing Time (unwillingly mine) (fic here) - complete Remus J. Lupin's Songs Too Murder To (for chapter 2 of The Killing Time) - complete 💖💖🍆🥵Sirius Black🥵🍆💖💖 (based on chapter 2 of The Killing Time - post) - complete Wedding Schmood (based on chapter 3 of The Killing Time) - complete back when we were dinosaurs (fic here) - ongoing Now I'm Spreading Your Legs (with mine in between) (Hatefuck fic here) - complete I Got My Spoon (inside your jar) (Hatefuck sequel fic here) - complete touching me (touching you) (Hatefuck sequel fic here) - complete That Cunt (Remus' playlist in touching me (touching you)) - complete The More You Ignore Me (the closer I get) (Hatefuck sequel fic here) - complete my blood is singing with your voice (fic here) - complete i'm green, you're green (fic here) - complete

Marauders

Welsh Moony (post) - complete coming back to you (lie low at lupin's - post) - complete I Will Survive (a wolfstar divorce) (post along with fic recs) - ongoing Will you be a satanist with me? (Evan(s)) - ongoing the moon & his star (wolfstar) - ongoing Remus Lupin vs the World - ongoing someone else's star (Sirius Black) - ongoing Lesbian Wolfstar - ongoing I can't love you how you want me to (jegulus) - ongoing Marauders Era (atyd) - ongoing it's been a while since I was your man (Grant - atyd) - ongoing skip a beat in the bloodline (the black brothers) - ongoing deathrow honeymoon (rosekiller) - ongoing the moon and stars (seem awful cold and bright) (wolfstar Christmas - post) - complete

Other Fics

everywhere, everything (all at once) (for everywhere, everything by @lynxindisguise) - ongoing Always an Angel, Never a God (for Always an Angel, Never a God by @butcherbacterium - post) - complete Beneath The Light (of a Neon Moon) (for Neon Moon by @krethes) - ongoing Crimson Rivers (for Crimson Rivers by bizarrestars on ao3) - complete bind my wandering heart to thee (for Dear Your Holiness by @mollymarymarie on ao3) - complete

Other (general)

Snowbaz, Simon Snow & Baz Pitch playlists - ongoing General playlists tag on my tumblr

#ignore this it's for my pinned post #playlist

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fruitcoops · 10 months

Note

The dorlene love is amazing!! If you are every inclined to write more dorlene smut (or just more dorlene content in general) I would love it!

Dorlene wedding planning on Lion Pride, ft. their content cash cows loving friends <3 Full disclosure: this social media fic was entirely inspired by the Rock the Boat scene in Derry Girls, a show Finn O'Hara would adore. Character credit goes to @lumosinlove!

TW for brief mention of alcohol at weddings

Dorcas’ hair was pinned back with tiny pearl barrettes that matched the buttons on her white suit when the video began. “This is Dorcas Meadowes, and welcome to Lion Pride!” She spread her hands with a smile. “As you can see, wedding season has begun, and I for one simply cannot wait. Not only because several members of the Lions are celebrating their own upcoming nuptials, but more importantly, because I am getting married to our favorite camera darling, Marlene McKinnon.

“Lions, I want you to know one thing when you inevitably watch this: I am shamelessly mining you for wedding playlist ideas because my wife-to-be and I have been too busy filming your nonsense to put the required time or effort into it. You’re welcome.” She winked at the camera. “On to the show! Boys, what are your favorite wedding songs?”

#7: James Potter

James’ brow furrowed slightly. “Do you want my wedding playlist? ‘Cause I’ll send you my wedding playlist. Get Maz in here and we’ll do a walkthrough of each song, I can call Lily—"

#17: Finn O’Hara

“Uh, obviously it’s Rock the Boat,” Finn scoffed. A few beats of silence passed; his eyes widened. “Oh my god, do none of you know the magic of Rock the Boat?”

“Is it like…the Cupid Shuffle?” Dorcas asked.

“Is it—we’re going to pretend you didn’t just ask that. No, no, come here. Ringer!” Finn shouted over his shoulder. “Gimme the speaker for, like, ten minutes! C’mere, D, there’s a dance and everything.”

“I’m in a suit,” Dorcas laughed.

“It’s Rock the Boat,” Finn countered. “You can’t get married without Rock the Boat.”

#5: Olli Halla

Olli thought for a long moment. “Is this a good time to mention that I’ve only been to one wedding?”

#6: Remus Lupin

“Wedding songs? The Electric Slide, hands-down.” Remus gave them a look of mock-offense as he finished taping his stick. “It’s an unbeatable classic. It was the first thing I put on the wedding list.”

#55: Sergei Ivanov

“Oh, god,” Sergei muttered, scratching at his beard. “It’s been too long since I got married. Hey, Dumo, what did you play at your wedding?”

#43: Thomas Walker

“The Cupid fucking Shuffle, Big D,” Talker laughed, meeting Dorcas’ high-five with great enthusiasm. “Yes. That’s what I’m talking about. You can’t have a party without the Cupid Shuffle.”

“That’s what I was saying,” Dorcas agreed.

#86: Evgeni Kuznetsov

Kuny lit up in his stall, then reached over to smack Nado on the leg. “Cha-Cha Slide! Oh my god, favorite. Hey, hey, everybody clap your hands!”

#1: Leo Knut

Leo clicked his tongue thoughtfully. “I’m gonna go with…drunk uncles dancing to Wobble at 4:30 on a Wednesday.”

Dorcas bit back a laugh. “Are the drunk uncles necessary?”

“Oh, without a doubt. If you don’t have your own, storebought is fine. They’re five daquiris in and the life of the fuckin’ party.”

**Editor’s Note: All songs included in this video are central to the Meadowes-McKinnon wedding playlist. Additionally, Dorcas Meadowes looks fine as hell in her suit. Thank you, and goodnight.

#dorcas meadowes #marlene mckinnon #dorlene #remus lupin #james potter #finn ohara #leo knut #evgeni kuznetsov #olli halla #sergei ivanov #thomas walker #sweater weather #vaincre #lumosinlove #my fic #fanfic #social media #lion pride #weddings

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allamericanb-tch · 3 days

Text

marauders as eliza mclamb songs

** i limited myself to the ones she has on soundcloud because i did not want to go through her entire tiktok page to find links for all of her old songs sorry im a lazy queen.

pretend my explanations are not convoluted and poorly worded

the playlist of songs mentioned please go listen to it (with the marauders in mind !! ) i am obsessed with eliza mclamb currently. i tried to use every song on this playlist since i couldn’t use every song on her tiktok but i did skip some so. sorry? also the lyrics are just the ones i thought were the most them. i did not type out every single lyric to all these songs im not a MANIAC

james — look at me and lie / “daddy issues”

genuinely this song makes me tear up every time. it’s so jegulus from james pov coded which i think is absolutely devastating. in my mind this song is james thinking about regulus, knowing he has the mark, and regulus is wasting away knowing that he can’t be with james anymore, unknowing that james knows he has the mark. ugh it just breaks my heart every time.

i fucking hate when you look at me and lie // but i see it in your eyes you haven’t given up anything, except maybe the last three years of your life

—

jegulus 💔

i know i remind you of the life you couldn’t live, you make that pretty clear when you lose your shit weirdly i like that side of you better. // to see you angry is more fulfilling than the apathy

———

remus — wendy’s parking lot / autopilot / dial tone

cigarettes i mean this is literally remus. but in all seriousness, this song is so remus feeling alone, very first and second year of him, before he really got on with the marauders.

smoke a single cigarette out the window // i want to go driving till i run out of gas, speed till i pass everybody in a baby blue subaru with their 401k’s // i don’t have anyone to cry to

—

remus trying to live his life after sirius leaves

doctor said i need routine // it’s time to drive around aimlessly and listen to music that used to make me cry, i wish it still did // i miss the feeling of feeling something

—

remus calling grant after sirius leaves

who can i call? // you don’t have to say anything at all // just stay on the line, to know somebody’s out there will do me fine

———

sirius — 2007 / haunted house

this song is sirius thinking about his time with regulus before hogwarts, and regulus idolizing his older brother and wanting to be just like him, and they grow up and grow apart, but really they’re scarily similar and sirius knows it and hates it because he hates himself.

you were still a baby, of course you’ll always be my little lady, but then you were freed // god, you’re turning into me // i want to hold your little face just look at you and say, ‘it’s not as good as it seems’ // it never gets better than being a kid with a dream

—

this is sirius returning to his apartment he has with remus after he escapes azkaban

i swear this house is haunted, i can’t be here without wanting to go back ten years and do it all again. // i just can’t make myself fit back into place

———

peter — speak

this is peter being quiet and shy and following james around like a lost puppy dog because james has always been his only friend, and he couldn’t bear to lose him, so he goes along with everything james does.

i never could talk loud enough so i learned how to listen. // i find my place in other people’s shadows. // i wait for you to ask me, ‘how is it you forgot how to speak?’

———

mary — pornstar tits / anti-cinematic

this song is so mary being oversexualized by the fandom, and only used as a device to further the plot of wolfstar fics by being a rival love interest for sirius.

they trade that shit like pokémon cards, swapping my body with somebody else’s // it’s either jezebel or madonna and i’m not sure which one is worse

—

this i think is mary leaving the wizarding world, and losing all her friends (..because they died) and trying to go back to life as a muggle

what if my best years are behind me? // what if i just keep getting older and lonelier?

———

lily — elastic band / american wasteland

this song reminds me of lily reminiscing on her life before she found about wizards and magic and became involved in the war, and knowing she can’t go back to the life she once had.

so many memories i can’t recover existing in only a feeling // sometimes if i think real hard its like i’m there again // i’ll think i’ll stay in this moment for a while

—

american lily evans. there i said it. but this song actually feels more petunia to me. petunia after lily leaves, feeling out of place without her built in best friend.

two kids in a double wide // take the city bus home // get off at the next stop and walk the rest of the way home in the dark

———

marlene — twin flame

marlene and dorcas, dorcas and marlene.

i can read your mind like you can read mine // do i like you, or do i like that you’re fucked up like me?

———

regulus — hydroplaning

this is regulus being in love with james, and being so deep into his self-hatred that he can’t even fathom why someone like james would like someone like him.

something about you liking me just doesn’t sit right with me i think it probably means you have bad taste. // and then of course i’ll whine about how no one could ever love me.

———

evan — drunk in a fancy shower

evan at a party feeling out of place because party is drunk kissing other girls, and not drunk kissing him. poor evan :(

it’s so clear that i really don’t belong here // is it so cynical to think that no one would give a shit if i crawled out this window? // i need to get the fuck up, get back out there fill my cup up

———

barty — zoned out

this is so barty losing his mind slowly after evan’s death

i came back into my body to find somebody else in it // i hate that i can’t listen to you over the sound of my heartbeat // sometimes i just have to leave

———

pandora — witching hour / all alone

pandora is very much the kind of person who would find comfort in being alone in the middle of the night, and being awake while the world is asleep.

it must be the witching hour if i’m awake // it’s like the universe has picked me up, i’m a tiny baby in her cosmic cup. // i’m not scared of the unknown

—

pandora being self aware and knowing that people think she’s weird and creepy but knowing she is on the right path for her <3

all alone, in my little world. if it’s a one man universe i’m my favorite girl. // ‘you’re all alone, well aren’t you wasting time?’ no i’m just taking mine.

———

dorcas — dreamgirl

dorcas being dorcas

i wanna be your dean girl // i like the version of me that lives in your mind // i’m still a mystery to you

———

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bennyyrabbit · 1 year

Text

Logan headcanons because I can

Autistic

Red is an overwhelming color for him, mainly due to his brain associating it with Roman and Roman's often overwhelming personality

Number 2 is why he despises when Thomas wears red.

The red pen he used to use was only due to his brain applying Strict Teacher Rules to his annotations and edits to Roman's scripts, he was extremely glad to find that Roman despised the pen and wanted him to use a different one

He used to be much more apt to outbursts of a more positive kind, such as willingly giving more information than strictly needed because he enjoyed helping the others learn things

This changed due to repeated negative feedback that makes Logan feel as though he did nothing but make the others feel stupid (red pen, again, but slightly worse because it was more EVERYTHING he was doing, than just one thing)

He stopped wearing his onesie, even when alone in his room, due to fear of being summoned and ridiculed for his childish behavior

He is much harder on himself than he is on the others, despite their apparent belief that he is an arrogant cocky dick

He doesn't often pay attention to the lyrics in songs, rather the beat and instrumental, therefore his music taste is extremely wonky, consisting of any kind of instrumental that makes his brain feel happy, including extremely inappropriate songs and/or extremely childish ones, without him even realizing the context of the words (this is actually backed by his playlist)

There is something about the formula of country music that makes it extremely appealing to him and his pattern-seeking brain

This also applies to those thriller movies that follow the classic killer pattern with the survival rules.

Janus and Roman are two of Logan's least favorite sides

Roman is too overwhelming, and Janus is incredibly hard for him to understand due to him talking almost exclusively in lies

Patton is kind of in the middle, if he was to properly rank them. His overly feelingsy thing, and the wishy washy of morals and the confusing mixture of both makes it hard for them to work together, but he prefers Patton to Roman because he is less overwhelming and loud and otherwise overstimulating, and he doesn't have to worry about Patton speaking in lies, which puts him above Janus.

Remus is in second place, simply because Remus is slightly more tolerable than Patton, even though Logan cannot place WHY (it might be how blunt Remus is compared to how Patton likes to sugarcoat tings and/or hide the negative things)

Virgil is his favorite because they can have logical debates that, even when they get out of hand, will not overwhelm and overstimulate him, they have similar sensory issues, and he is simply the calmest of all the other sides

Logan despises his outbursts, regardless of what kind, and he refused to speak to any of the sides for a week after WTIT

Virgil was the first one to break through afterwards

Remus apologized for pushing him so far, but clarified that he wasn't actually sorry for DOING it, and more for how much it clearly affected Logan beyond the automatic reaction he had hoped for

Logan accepted this apology, because it was sincere, and he can understand Remus' point of view

He did get him back, however, by forcing him to sit through an entire 'lesson' on actual class etiquette.

This started a kind of 'battle' between them of putting each other through increasingly annoying things that one enjoyed and the other did not

Virgil caught Remus forcing Logan to wear a particular texture that extremely bothered his sensory stuff, as a part of this 'game' and proceeded to tear Remus a new one about abusing a fun little game that Virgil thought was a bad idea in the first place, and Can't you see that you've gone too far, this isn't funny anymore, he's genuinely distressed, get him out of that before I take YOUR nipples and shove them up YOUR nose.

Remus didn't actually care about the nipple thing, but he did get where Virgil was coming from, and got Logan out of that Horrific Sweater of that Horrific Texture, and apologized by letting Logan force him to wear an Actual Tie tied Properly for an Entire Day

The game has been on hiatus since because Virgil refuses to allow it to continue, despite Logan insisting that it's Quite Fine, Virgil, there is No Need for your Continued Vigilance, however Appreciated it is. (and it is VERY appreciated, Logan does not usually receive this kind of positive attention to make sure he is comfortable and stays that way)

Logan and Remus will sit and watch Those Movies Referenced In Number 11 together, and will each go on rants about how Stupid that Character is for going in That Room, or Up Those Stairs or something equally stereotypical and stupid

This never gets old, and Logan thinks he may do this until he ceases to exist however that may happen

They watched Trick (2019) together, and Logan spent an hour and a half ranting about how Fucking Amazing the movie was and how The End was So Good and Revolutionary and It's Such A Shame this movie Isn't More Popular because it's A Masterpiece

This is the moment Remus realizes he's in love with Logan

Remus says this seconds after realizing it, cutting Logan off mid-rant

Logan gapes at him for a minute, unsure how to respond, before (extremely apologetically) explaining that he does not feel those feelings for Remus, and that he doesn't want their difference in feelings to harm their friendship because Frankly he's Unsure how he would Continue Doing This (existing) without Remus there in some capacity

This makes their friendship extremely strained, and eventually, they stop spending time together.

Remus explains that this is because he can't Keep Doing This because he is constantly Not Saying Things he wants to say to Logan so that Logan doesn't think he's Actively Hitting On Him, and it makes Remus Physically Ill to not say his things out loud

Logan is unable to function properly for a week after this, and he doesn't really understand how he got This Attached to him.

Virgil talks some sense into him, and Logan has to then spend three months examining his feelings (ugh, feelings) for Remus, until he comes to the conclusion that he Is, In Fact, In Love With Remus

His immediate reaction is to go straight to Remus' room and tell him his feelings

Virgil tries to stop him and fails because Logan cannot think of one logical reason that Remus wouldn't at least hear him out, even if Remus' feelings have since disappeared, which Logan knows is something that happens, and is uncontrollable (if those feelings WERE controllable, he would never have them)

The second Logan says the words, "I'm in love with you", Remus kisses him without a seconds thought, because this is something he's wanted to do since Before he realized he was in love with Logan.

Logan's brain cuts out and overheats as if he is a literal computer, and it takes the literal snap of his neck (killing him) to properly reboot him so he can function.

Remus spent almost three hours trying to get Logan back to normal and almost has an anxiety attack thinking he's just caused the most catastrophic thing ever and somehow literally killed Thomas' Logic.

Virgil senses Remus' increasing anxiety, and is the one to suggest the neck snap. He says it as a joke, to lighten the mood to hopefully make Remus feel better, and Remus takes it as a genuine suggestion.

The first thing Logan does once rebooted, is kiss Remus back.

#intrulogical #oops i wrote a mini fic i think #sanders sides #logan logic sanders #logan sanders #remus sanders #remus intrustive thoughts sanders #ts logan #ts remus #ts virgil #virgil sanders #virgil anxiety sanders #headcannons #headcanons

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sarcastic-kaz · 5 months

Note

Can u do me a favor & drop that genmui playlist u mentioned? Also which song of that playlist is your personal favorite?

Maybe I’ll find a new song to obsess over <3

yessss (the description i have for the playlist is "pov we're teenagers in love and about to bleed out but i want to kiss you -genya" and that perfecty sums up how i feel about their relationship in the canon universe (not kimegaku) its sorta like right person wrong time) my favourite circulates but right now its "i wanna be your boyfriend" because it just feels like genya swooning over mui and it sounds so silly (i put them all in chronological order of how their love story lolll)

i wanna be your boyfriend - hot freaks

i wanna be you boyfriend, i wanna go on walks with you, i wanna have long talks with you (it just sounds like genya pining over mui what can i say)

hey lover - the daughters of eve

life's a problem in my hands, but if you really, really love me, in my heart, you'd be a big man (hey lover just sounds like something they would call each other)

beautiful boy - john lennon

beautiful beautiful beautiful, beautiful boy (just how he sings it is so sweet and how i imagine mui saying it to genya)

say yes to heaven - lana del ray

say yes to heaven, say yes to me, i've got my eye on you, i've got my eye on you (i could imagine genya whispering this in the middle of the night to mui)

paper rings - taylor swift

i like shiny things, but i'd marry you with paper rings, uhuh, that's right, darling, you're the one i want, and i hate accidents except when we went from friends to this (whimsical childish thinking that they would both survive the final fight)

i wanna be yours - arctic monkeys

secrets i have held in my heart are harder to hide than i thought, maybe i just wanna be yours (just them reciting their vows, both bleeding out and ready to die)

see you again - tyler the creator & kali uchis

can i get a kiss? and can you make it last forever, i said i'm 'bout to got to war, and i don't know if i'ma see you again (they're going to war and the song sounds like teenage love)

derniere danse - indila

je remue le ciel, le jour, la nuit, je danse avec le vent, la pluie, un peu d'amour, un brin de miel (translation has really pretty symbolism and it sounds like battle edit music)

daylight - david kushner

oh i love it and i hate it at the same time, hidin' all of our sins from the daylight, from the daylight, runnin' from the daylight (genya flashing back to his backstory)

muichiro tokito theme - samuel kim

0:31 - 0:45 (love the accompaniment of the bell with the rest of the growing music)

džanum - teya dora

ova duša nema dom, ova duša nema ton, crne zore, svеće gore, moje morе, moje more, moje more (the translation. omg.)

mr loverman - ricky montgomery

i'm mr loverman, oh, and i miss my lover, i've shattered now, i'm spilling out (genya worrying over mui during the battle. mic drop.)

softcore - the neighborhood

i'm too consumed with my own life, are we too young for this? feels like i can't move, sharing my heart, it's tearing me apart (they really were too young, and genya's fear of being useless)

chandelier - sia

i'm holdin' on for dear life, won't look down won't open my eyes, keep my glass full until morning light, 'cuz i'm just holdin' on for tonight (desperation to stay alive long enough to be useful during the fight)

wildest dreams - taylor swift

he's so tall and handsome as hell, he's so bad, but he does it so well, and when we've had our very last kiss, my last request is; say you'll remember me (mui just thinking genya would survive and he would die)

titanium - david guetta & sia

i'm bulletproof, nothing to lose, fire away, fire away, ricochet, you take your aim, fire away, fire away (muichirou telling genya to shoot even though genya could've shot him)

somewhere only we know - keane

and if you have a minute why don't we go, talk about it somewhere only we know, this could be the end of everything, so why don't we go, somewhere only we know (it sounds sad and the lyrics could imply an already-present relationship)

blood//water - grandson

we'll never get free, lamb to the slaughter, what you gon' do when there's blood in the water? (guilting kokushibo over killing two children)

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #genmui #shinazugawa genya #tokitou muichirou #kny #playlist #muigen #muichiro tokito #muichiro x genya #kny spoilers #uppermoon one fight

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runwiththerain · 1 year

Text

hellooooo :]

this is my intro post !

welcome to my lil corner of the internet. it is a safe space that you can always call home <3

my main blog is mostly a hub for all my sideblogs and other stuff. it has no theme and is mostly reblogs

[if you've read this, please give it a like <3]

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basic information

hi! my name is percy/perce/perseus/persephone and my pronouns are he/they/she [please do not use it/its or neos/xenos]

i'm 14 and i'm genderfluid/aroace. i'm also neurodivergent and have been diagnosed with autism and anxiety among other things

some of my main interests are marauders, riordanverse, osemanverse, stranger things, ever after high, enola holmes, brooklyn 99, the good place, stardew valley, taylor swift, conan gray, anson seabra, spotify, music, orchestra, choir, writing, winter, cats, netflix and pinterest

my dms are always open! and feel free to send me random asks to get to know me better! in general i'll try to respond quickly but with school and family it's hard to! i do not hate you!

dnis: racist, homophobic, terf, bigoted in general, but also harringrove/billy stans, mileven, snape apologists, people in the marauders fandom who overlook the women and nsfw blogs

we do not support jkr here !!!!!

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my tags, sideblogs and links

my tags:

#rwtr: main tag ig

#rwtr originals: my original posts

#rwtr mecore: stuff about me/that i relate to

#rwtr asks: my asks

#rwtr ask games: ask games

#rwtr writing: my writing

#rwtr music: my music spam/spotify links

#rwtr tag games: tag games that i participate in

#rwtr sideblogs: bc i have too many

#*insert sideblog*: that said sideblog

#rwtrs loves: my moots

#rwtrs love *insert name*: ur moot tag

my sideblogs: [this is where i will post my fandom specific content, sidenote: i am a multishipper]

daily journal ig: planetpercy [mostly og posts]

ever after high: maddiedarlingandchase

marauders: mirrorballjamespotter

music: feelslikewehadmatchingwounds [mainly conan, taylor, olivia, cavetown, gracie, alec, anson, etc. but also whatever i feel like]

my story/oc spam: thewallflowersstory

osemanverse: toricharlieolly

relatable posts: nowimjustajigsaw [where i put posts so i don't spam my main]

riordanverse: percypipesbesties

stranger things: willelmaxfriendship

taylor swift: somebodylosestheirmind [gaylor]

my other links:

ao3 [i occasionally post fics]

osemanverse discord [dm me if you want my discord acc]

pinterest [i started a new acc so it's basically empty lol]

pronouns page [it has more on my names and preferred terms and labels and such]

spotify [i am an addict and it's a problem, i have over 4,000 liked songs and 400 playlists]

uquiz masterlist [for all my uquizzes that i've made]

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fandom specific stuff

ever after high: maddie hatter, darling charming, chase redford, lizzie hearts, alistair wonderland, briar beauty, cerise hood, raven queen, rapple, dapple, huntlynn, dexven, lizziexmaddie, kittyxlizzie, hopperxbriar, lizziexdarig, ravenxcerise, maddiexkitty, ravenxmaddie, aroace maddie

marauders: james potter, pandora ollivander, regulus black, sirius black, remus lupin, lily evans, marlene mckinnon, xeno lovegood, minerva mcgonagall, poppy pomfrey, jily, jegulus, jegulily, wolfstar, pandalily, pandamarylily, marylily, dorlene, minervaxpoppy, platonic jily, platonic prongsfoot, platonic moonwater

osemanverse: [i've read everything] charlie spring, olly spring, darcy olsson, elle argent, nellie, tori spring, michael holden, aled last, frances janvier, bliss lai, lister bird, georgia warr, sunil jha, rooney bach, narlie, taoelle, tarcy, sprolden, daled, rowanxbliss, listerxjimmy, pipxrooney, sunilxjason, qpr georgiaxroony, platonic charliexelle, qpr sprolden, qpr francesxaled

riordanverse: percy jackson, annabeth chase, piper mclean, leo valdez, reyna ramirez arellano, will solace, hazel levesque, rachel dare, magnus chase, alex fierro, mallory keen, tj, sally jackson, percabeth, pipabeth, shelper, theyna, solangelo, frazel, fierrochase, platonic percyxpiper, platonic leoxannabeth, platonic piperxleo, platonic willxrachel

stranger things: el hopper, will byers, max mayfield, lucas sinclair, robin buckley, steve harrington, nancy wheeler, joyce byers, jim hopper, byler, elmax, elumax, lumax, ronance, steddie, jargyle, jopper, platonic stobin, platonic madwheeler, platonic elmike, willel twims

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favourite music stuff

[i also listen to classical music and soundtracks]

artists: taylor swift, conan gray, alec benjamin, anson seabra, one direction, olivia rodrigo, lovelytheband, cavetown, girl in red, harry styles, 5 seconds of summer, louis tomlinson, why don't we, ajr, the neighbourhood, panic at the disco, all time low, fall out boy, arctic monkeys and set it off

songs: wonderland by taylor swift, august by taylor swift, dancing with our hands tied by taylor swift, the great war by taylor swift, champagne problems by taylor swift, the exit by conan gray, jigsaw by conan gray, broken by lovelytheband, devil town by cavetown, we made it by david hugo, walked through hell by anson seabra, come close by anson seabra and youth by troye sivan

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finally, to end this long-ass post [that may or may not have took me an hour to make], here are some reminders :]

please drink some water, stay hydrated!

please eat some food, even if your brain thinks your body doesn't deserve it

sleep if it is past 10pm or before 7am xx

go to the bathroom, if you need to

have a shower, if you need to and can /nf

brush your teeth/hair, if you need to and can /nf

take a break, relax, if you have been working for a while

slow progress is still progress

healing/recovery isn't linear, there will be good days ad bad days

you are loved <3 if not by anyone, but me

it will get better, somehow, even if you don't believe it

please stay safe y'all, ilysm xx

#intro post #rwtr mecore #rwtr asks #rwtr ask games #rwtr writing #rwtr music #rwtr tag games #rwtr sideblogs #rwtrs loves #last edited 20.03.2023

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missgryffin · 4 months

Note

hi! I’m a new writer and I started a fic but I just wanted to ask if you had any advice for writing fanfiction. I started my fic but I’m kinda hitting a writers block and I don’t know where I want my story to go. I want my characters to have dimension but I don’t think I’m communicating it well. And my plot line, I feel like it’s so hard to communicate in writing. I just feel like my writing is bad as a whole and I wanted to ask for advice because you’re literally one of the best writers I’ve encountered! Love your writing so much

Thanks for the kind words, anon!! 🫶 This got long, so I put it below a cut:

First off, congrats on getting started — that's always the hardest part, and there's a lot of bravery in starting something new and letting your work exist outside your head. The #1 piece of advice I hear everywhere and pass along to you is simply to keep going. Writing is a muscle, and it takes repetition, practice, reflection, etc. to find your style and get better. I came back to writing in 2020, and it took writing consistently since then for me to be where I am now of feeling like my writing's where I want it to be and feeling confident about bigger pieces.

On the direction of your story and your plot, know that this is such a common dilemma for writers!! And honestly, the advice out there varies a lot depending on if you're more of a pantser (make it up as you go) or plotter (plot it all out first). I'm somewhere in the middle. I plot a decent amount, but sometimes it's only in broad strokes, so I leave room for building out scenes intuitively as I write. I also get stuck all the time, and for me, I know that means that something's not working — either I have to go back and change something in the prior paragraph/dialogue, or I have to take the scene in a new direction, or I have to figure out a different way to bridge the gap between what happened and what I know I'm building toward.

At this point, my advice to you would be this: do some daydreaming. Go on Pinterest, browse Tumblr, go on a walk with a good playlist. Let your mind wander, mood board your fic, let all the vibes marinate. Whatever scene ideas pop into your head, write them. Write out of order (you can always massage things to fit chronologically later). Loosely figure out your ending, so you at least know where you need to end up — sometimes it's easier to work backwards when outlining the latter part of a fic. Use tropes and their conventional story beats as much or as little as is helpful to you.

Once you have that direction, my advice on "communicating" your plot and characters really boils down to the adage of "show don't tell." Which sounds so cliché, I know, but it really does work!! Think about the aspect of your plot or character you want to be coming across to the reader, and then brainstorm actions or scenes that could demonstrate that happening.

An example of when I was very conscientious of this is Castling. (Spoilers ahead!) The main plot is present day, but I wanted to build the emotion and pining and just the stakes overall by inserting past flashbacks, as opposed to just saying, Lily and James were best friends while growing up at school. So I came up with a handful of significant moments to show their friendship in action throughout their past. The second year scene sets it all up: Lily does not hesitate to confront James for Remus, demonstrating both her fierce + sassy personality and the depth of her friendship with Remus. The seventh year scenes show how everything's evolved: first there's the fight in the corridor, in which James steps in to shield Lily and punches Mulciber after an incident that escalated while they were brewing Amortentia in Potions, and then later that night Lily finds out James got broken up with. I never had to say that they were starting to subliminally have feelings/attraction toward each other — we pick up on that based on what happens: James doesn't just defend Lily out of basic nobility; he's "a caged bull in Sirius's arms" in the immediate aftermath of Amortentia 👀, which is the breaking point for his girlfriend. James picks Lily's friendship in his girlfriend's ultimatum without second thought. And they don't hug. It's not a sibling-like consolation because there's an undercurrent of tension that's decidedly not sibling-like anymore — they're just in total denial about it. And then finally there's the post-school scene, in which they're more comfortable around each other in part because they're simply more mature and have figured out how to care about each other without crossing the boundary of friendship (yet).

Something I tell myself a lot when it comes to figuring out plot and "showing" the reader is plot can be small. I'm constantly saying this to myself. And what I mean by that is, "plot" doesn't have to be some sweeping, complicated thing. Of course some stories go that way and longer stories often necessitate more complex narratives, but there can be just as much plot in "discovering feelings for each other" (As Lovers Go) as there is in "planning a complicated mission that goes awry because of a secret double-agent" (Vindicated). It's simply a matter of going more deeply into smaller details and the emotional trajectories of the story. So "plot can be small" doesn't mean the plot itself is "smaller" or "lesser," it means that plot can be based in small actions that are incredibly important or meaningful to the characters, and the story then teases out all the little details surrounding those small actions.

And finally, the last thing I'll say (this already getting way too long 😅) is that plot and character development are both very layered things. The Castling corridor fight initially was just a corridor fight — the idea for adding the Amortentia element came later, and the idea for connecting the fight with the ultimatum and the breakup came even later after that. Don't put pressure on yourself to figure things out entirely the very first time you write something down!! Ideas build on each other as you keep writing. You'll add layers that make scenes better. And the layers of the story and the characters will keep building throughout the story. This is where dimension comes from. We don't need to know everything about a character right away — let the layers peel back as the story goes on.

If you're still reading: I hope this can help!! Best of luck with your writing!! 💗

#ask #on writing

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beauty-and-passion · 1 year

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"Into the Unknown" and into my dashboard too

So, let me get this straight:

I was here, writing my analysis for Can Lying Be Good, all happy and naive like a little chicken, thinking it was almost time to go to sleep, when people started talking about moceit and Roman in a field and I was like... wait, is there a Sanders Sides video?!

And guess what, there is.

No, of course I didn’t scream when Janus appeared with that coat. You good sir, you are too stylish. I hate you and I love you. But mostly love you.

Even more important, MY HEADCANON IS RIGHT. The headcanon I keep talking about since last year. My headcanon about Janus and Patton meeting to talk about Thomas and morals and changes in his life. That headcanon is now canon. Janus clearly talked about multiple meetings. They met more than once. They MET and that means I was right and my headcanon is canon.

Okay, maybe Janus and Patton were not in a wheatfield, but it’s just a matter of time. It’s just because Mr. Sanders didn’t have a wheatfield available. I believe that, once he will find it, I will have my wheatfield. For now, we have the huge tall trees I also mentioned. It’s just a matter of TIME.

And their conversation! They said just a couple lines, but that was EXACTLY how I imagined their meetings: Janus exposing his ideas, Patton listening, maybe understanding, maybe not agreeing. This is all I wanted. I want more of it. The setting isn’t the same, but I don’t care: these two interacted and it was beautiful.

And yes, my shipping heart is pleased too, because the perfection of this moceit moment is everything. What did I say about moceit being more than just “cute couple being cute”? That’s what I meant.

Again with the setting because it just blew my mind: the Sides are not all around Thomas. They are in other places. Does that mean MY IDEA OF THE ROOMS IS CANON TOO?! Are those their rooms?

After all, Virgil is on the couch of his house, Roman is in a field that he could’ve just created. And Remus is on the railway tracks because he’s the best Side in the world and I love him. Okay, we’re missing Logan’s lighthouse, but just because Mr. Sanders didn’t have the sea available. I believe this is also a matter of time. Once he will find a good location near the sea, I will have my lighthouse headcanon confirmed. It’s a matter of TIME.

Last but not least, we have Janus singing and all the lyrics perfectly match the Sides that appear. Mentions of reveals for Virgil, pretending for Roman, a bit of unknown (”where will we end”) for Remus, burdens for Logan.

But, most importantly, the mention of golden memories dancing in a swirl associated with Patton. And if any of you read my analysis of Janus’ playlist and this song in particular, you will remember that I had a very specific image of this song, as something associated with the end of Thomas’ life and Janus and Patton cooperating until the end by mixing lies with memories as it always happen for old people.

So... was that a hint? A confirmation? Another headcanon?

Moral of the story: I am unstoppable. I am god. I am canon. I feel the power. I am amazed and shocked.

What a great way to end my day, Mr. Sanders.

#sanders sides #ts spoilers #thomas sanders #patton sanders #janus sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #remus sanders #virgil sanders #the moceit is really unstoppable #and apparently my headcanons are unstoppable too XD #how am I supposed to go to sleep now #I had to write this post

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wastelandmoony · 2 months

Text

Déjà Vécu: Chapter Twenty-Seven

Chapter Twenty-Seven : Losing Dogs

Summary: A tipping point.

Characters: Remus Lupin/Reader, Sirius Black/Reader (no use of y/n), James Potter, Petter Pettigrew, Regulus Black, Marlene McKinnon, Mary MacDonald, Lily Evans

Warnings: 18+ Only, Minors DNI;

a/n: I've been feeling like shit about everything lately, and had considered not posting for a while, but low and behold I've stopped feeling like a twat and am smashing that post button once again.

Déjà Vécu Masterlist

Companion Playlist

Read on AO3

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May 20th, 1976

Weeks of revising had turned her brain into certifiable mush. For once, the entire study group had organized to meet, but she couldn’t seem to find the mental capacity to join them.

“I just think that if I try to remember one more fact about Chimaera, I might actually implode,” her head was face down on the breakfast table, voice muffled and exhausted.

Remus massaged in-between her shoulders, “You won’t miss much…besides watching Prongs make a fool out of himself to impress Lily again.”

She groaned.

“I know it’s your favorite,” Remus laughed.

Straightening back up, she signed into a bite of toast. Marlene made eye contact with her from down the table. “Want to hit the pitch instead? I don’t much feel like revising either,” she said with a grimace.

“You’re a godsend, Marlene McKinnon,” she smiled in response.

Sirius having just heard the tail end of the conversation, frowned at them, “I want to join too! Don’t leave me with them, please, I’ll be bored out of my mind.” The look he gave her was a cross between sad puppy, and pleading child.

She rolled her eyes, “No! You promised me you’d study now that we’re a month away from exams. I’m holding you to it.”

Sirius groaned and took a rather large swig of tea.

“C’mon Marls,” she grabbed her stuff and stood up, “Lets head out.”

Sirius looked up at her through his lashes, “Have I told you that you’re my least favorite friend?”

She rounded the table, stopping to bend down and whisper in his ear “We both know that’s a lie.” One kiss on the cheek, and a wave to the rest of their friends, and the two girls were off to the quidditch pitch, academics a far off thought for the afternoon.

———

“Jesus, Marls,” she gaped at her friend, having just launched the hardest hit on a bludger she’d ever seen, “I don’t know how you do that. It’s amazing.”

Marlene shrugged from a few meters away, “It’s a gift, I know.”

She smiled, taking a lap around the goal posts to feel the wind. It was a perfect day, no clouds in the sky, warm spring air the prime temperature for flying. She could practically feel the stress melting away as she glided around the pitch.

After a few hours, they took a break, pausing to hover over the far side of the field.

“So…what’s up with you and Dorcas?” She looked over at Marlene. Mary had told her (under sworn secrecy) that Marlene had hooked up with the Slytherin chaser after a party in the dungeons a few weeks back.

Marlene shrugged again, the portrait of nonchalance, “It’s…complicated I guess. We’re exclusive, but we’re not labeling it as anything just yet.”

She smiled tentatively at her friend, “Are you happy?”

A beaming grin split Marlene’s face, “Incredibly.”

“Then that’s all that matters, right?” A crumb of jealously formed in her chest. She wanted to feel that too, the joy and happiness that Marlene had found; the devotion that James showed Lily, and the fondness she had begun showing him in return. She wanted that, wanted to experience reciprocal love.

“What’s going on with you and Black?” Marlene took a drink from her water, eyeing her suspiciously.

“Sirius?” Her heart skipped a beat. Marlene nodded, smirking.

She shook her head, “Nothing. We’re friends.”

“Bullshit,” Marlene turned towards her, “we can all see it!”

This was ridiculous, she felt her face becoming hot.

Marlene shook her head, “You two have always been close, but I don’t know…this year it’s been different.”

She stared out over the pitch, trying to figure out what to say. There was nothing to say. Things had seemed different between them, she hadn’t realized it until now how much closer they’d gotten since last year, how much she’d begun to miss him when he wasn’t with her.

“Marlene, I—“ she paused to find the right words, sighing when she came up short. Rubbing a hand over her face, she groaned, “God, I’m so obvious, aren’t I.”

Marlene laughed, “Yes, you’re both almost gross to look at sometimes.”

“Both?” She cocked an eyebrow.

Marlene nodded, “You don’t see the way he looks at you, he follows your every move, like he’s afraid to let you out of his sight for too long.”

It was similar to what Mary had told her months ago, that Sirius’ attention always seemed to linger on her. Though everyone else seemed to see it, why didn’t he say something? Why didn’t he make a move?

She sighed in frustration, a breeze blowing her hair back and cooling her nerves.

“Want to head back? Dinner’s in a few, and I’d love to change out of these clothes beforehand,” She glanced over at her friend.

Marlene nodded, “Yeah, come back to the Tower, you can shower at ours.”

The two flew towards the ground, landing softly and headed back up towards the castle.

———

After showering and changing into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, the two girls lounged by the fireplace and waited for the rest of their friends to get back before heading down to dinner. As she stretched out her sore legs, a soft sniffling echoed through the portrait entrance. Lily quickly walked through, wiping her eyes and hurrying towards the girls dormitory.

The two of them were instantly on their feet.

“Lils, what’s wrong?” She said, trying to placate their friend.

Lily shook her head and pushed past them both, disappearing up the steps.

Mary breathlessly ran through the portrait a split second later, “Did she go upstairs?”

“Yes, Mary what happened?” She was on edge, and by the look on her friend’s face, the feeling was mutual.

Mary shook her head sadly, “It was Severus.”

Her hands curled into fists at her side, “What did he do to her, Mary.”

She felt Marlene tense at her side as well.

“He didn’t do anything…it’s what he said…” Mary trailed off, eyes gazing towards the girls dormitory stairs. Her voice lowered, “He called Lily a mudblood.”

She’d long let go of the power that word held over her, and had come to ignore its taunt so many times that it no longer affected her. But she knew Lily, and though they all hated Severus, she couldn’t imagine having someone she thought of as a friend call her something so vile.

The group of voices tumbling through the portrait hole could only be the boys. Sure enough, the four entered the common room, frantically talking over each other in various tones. Sirius seemed elated, talking hurriedly to James and grinning from ear to ear. The latter was pale and worried, locking eyes with the girls the moment they stepped into the room. Remus raised his eyebrows at her in a way that said “buckle up for this one.”

James strode over to Mary, “Did Lily come back here? Is she okay?”

Mary crossed her arms over her chest, taking on a defensive stance, “She doesn’t want to talk to you Potter.”

She glanced between her two friends, confused, “What’s going on…?”

Mary hadn’t dropped James’s stare, “Why don’t you tell them, James? Tell them how you made Lily cry today.”

Her head whipped to him, “What. Did. You. Do?!”

From the back of the room, the other three boys cringed in solidarity with their friend.

James started stuttering, “I—I didn’t mean to! We were just having a laugh, and of course Snivellus had to take it too far—“

“You removed his trousers while Sirius levitated him upside down!” Mary hissed.

She stared at James, eyes darting to Sirius as he tried to shuffle behind Remus, “I’ll deal with you later, Black.”

A soft “fuck” could be heard from the other side of the room.

She looked back at James, eyes filled with disbelief and hurt, “Why would you do that? I know we don’t particularly like Severus, but how does this make you any better than him or the other bullies in his house?”

James looked at the floor, the reality of what he’d done finally sinking in fully. “I…wasn’t thinking. I just thought it would be funny, and when it was over he…took a shot at Lily. She didn’t deserve that…”

She shook her head, “I don’t blame her for not wanting to speak with you, and I sure as hell am not going to speak on your behalf.”

James nodded sadly.

“You’ll just have to wait until she wants to talk about it. I’m not going to help you this time, Jamie.”

He nodded again, turning around and slumping upstairs towards the boys dormitory, followed quickly by Peter.

She turned to Mary, “Can you go check on her, please? I’ll handle the rest of these idiots.”

Mary squeezed her hand and ran up the stairs with Marlene to be with their friend.

Her eyes narrowed at Sirius, still half hidden behind Remus’s tall frame. The latter gave her a look and began to walk up towards the dorm, Sirius scoffing at him.

Remus turned and raised his eye brows, “I’m not helping you, mate, you’re on your own.”

She stared at Sirius from a few meters away, the two of them the only ones left in the common room. He shifted nervously on his feet. “I—“

She held up a hand to cut him off, “I don’t care, Sirius.”

He nodded, gaze falling to the floor as she approached.

“What’re you doing?” She asked him softly, stopping a few feet away.

He dared a glance, “Standing here?”

She shook her head, “That’s not what I meant. You’re better than this, Siri. Don’t act like them.”

Sirius’ face became stony, “Like who?”

“You know exactly who I’m referring to…”

Sirius paused, looking out of the window of the tower in thought. She could practically see his internal battle, the nature to hurt and disrupt pitted against the desire and the heart to do good. He wasn’t a bad person, not by a long shot, but if he didn’t begin to think before he acted, the consequences would only continue to get larger.

She watched his brows furrow, and her heart strained a little. Over the years of knowing him, she had come to realize that the only way to get through to Sirius was with love. Yelling and fighting with him was pointless, it’s what he’d grown up with, and what he’d learned to counter. Love and kindness seemed to be the only things that actually sunk in.

Closing the gap between them, her arms wound their way around his neck, and she hugged him close. It took him aback for a beat, but he returned the embrace wholeheartedly.

“You’re a good person, Sirius, please don’t lose that,” she whispered.

He played with the ends of her hair, “I’m sorry…”

“I’m not the one you need to apologize to,” she said.

“I know, but I want to,” his eyes were piercing as she pulled back to look at him, the sincerity in them was jarring.

“Thank you…” she whispered, unsure of how to react. She realized he was still holding onto her waist, the warmth from his hands seeping through her shirt.

She cleared her throat, “I don’t think the rest of them will want to come down to dinner, so do you want to help me steal food from the kitchens? We can bring it back up here.”

Sirius smirked, thumbs grazing against her skin, “Go on then.”

———

June 13th, 1976

Remus wasn’t in the hospital wing when she went down just before breakfast. Though his absence was not completely unusual, the look on Madam Pomfrey’s face when she walked into the infirmary was enough to set her nerves on edge.

“He’s already left, dear,” the healer said, her eyes full of something that she could only clock as pity.

“Is he okay? Did something happen” She said, clutching the bar of Honeydukes chocolate in her pocket.

Madam Pomfrey paused, clearly struggling to find the right words, “…I think you should speak with him, love.”

———

Students were filtering out of the Great Hall as she strode through the doors. She glanced at the Gryffindor table, hoping to see Remus and her friends sitting and eating breakfast, but she just caught sight of Lily and Mary packing up to leave.

“Hiya,” she said breathlessly to the two girls, the pattern of her breathing severely impacted by the racing of her heart, “Have you seen Remus?”

Lily furrowed her brows in concern, “He stopped by briefly and grabbed some food, mumbled something about the library. Is everything alright?”

She nodded, though not very convincingly, and ran out of the Great Hall.

Something had happened, something…bad. She could feel it in her stomach.

But what had been so awful Madam Pomfrey wouldn’t keep Remus in the hospital wing? He obviously couldn’t be that hurt?

The familiar carved doors of the library approached on her right, and she ripped them open more aggressively than she should’ve. Madam Pince scowled, and she didn’t even bother giving the old woman a kind smile like usual. Peering down each line of shelves, she searched every corner and chair on the lower floor for Remus, to no avail.

“Fuck…” she sighed, climbing the stairs to the second floor landing. It was usually quieter up here, so she should’ve expected to see Remus posted up at the far corner behind a row of shelves, head buried in a textbook.

“Moony?” She said lowly, to not piss off the crotchety librarian who was more than likely hovering nearby.

He lowered the book and gave her a tired smile, “Hey.”

“Everything alright?” She sat beside him in an upholstered chair, assessing him for any new injuries.

He didn’t answer. Instead, he dragged a scarred hand down his face, then stared out of the windows across the walkway.

“…Remus?” She whispered, finding herself unable to breathe properly.

He shifted his eyes to her, and she saw it then. The devastating sadness and heartache etched into his face.

“What happened?” She swallowed.

“There was…an accident…” he averted his eyes again, staring down at his hands, “Severus. He—he saw—“

Her throat burned. Whether with bile or tears, she wasn’t sure. The only thing she saw after Remus began to explain what had happened the night prior, was pure red.

———

She doesn’t remember how she got to Gryffindor Tower.

She doesn’t remember giving the Fat Lady the password.

She doesn’t remember climbing through the portrait and coming to a stop in the common room.

All she remembers is the color red.

The color red, and the look on Sirius Blacks face.

He was perched on the armrest of the couch, arms crossed and face sallow.

James stood over him, just as pale but his cheeks were flushed in anger. They were talking in tense whispers when Sirius’ attention snapped to her.

James turned around sharply, shoulders relaxing when he saw who it was. “Hey,” he sighed tiredly.

She ignored him, walking closer.

Sirius had been crying, she could tell by how bloodshot his eyes were.

She didn’t care.

He stood up as she approached, knowing exactly what she was there for.

“I didn’t mean to—“ he started, only for her to rear back and punch him in the side of the head.

“YOU COULD’VE KILLED HIM!” She screamed, pushing him backwards into the couch, “YOU COULD’VE FUCKING KILLED HIM!”

James came up behind her and put her into a hold, pinning her arms to her side, “Severus didn’t get hurt—“

“I don’t give a shit about Severus!” She thrashed in his arms, trying to break free, “The ministry would’ve killed Remus if he so much as touched him!”

Sirius clutched the side of his face, turning to stare at her with despair and self-loathing in his eyes, “…I’m sorry,” he murmured.

She continued to pull at James’ grasp.

“You’re fucking dead to me,” she spat as James dragged her towards the portrait entrance, “DO YOU HEAR ME?! YOU’RE FUCKING DEAD TO ME, BLACK!” She screamed as James pulled her out into the corridor beyond.

The last thing she saw before the portrait shut, was Sirius burying his face in his hands, his shoulders beginning to shake.

A few moments passed, her breathing still ragged as James held her tightly and waited for her to calm down.

“Are you going to behave, or do I have to bar you from the tower?” James said sternly into her ear.

She nodded reluctantly, and he finally released her. He sighed, dragging a hand through his hair, “This is a fuckin’ mess.”

“We could’ve lost him, James,” she whispered, staring vacantly out of the window, “We came so close…I can’t—“

She began to hyperventilate, sobs erupting violently from her as James pulled her close again.

“I don’t know what he was thinking,” he said quietly against her hair, “Have you seen Moony?”

She nodded silently, not able to speak fully without screaming.

“Is he alright? I only saw him this morning…when Dumbledore told him what happened.”

She shuddered a breath, “He’s…shaken up. We didn’t talk much about it, just what he was told, I guess. You know how he is, he never wants to open up.”

They stood there for a moment, James holding her as she gathered herself.

“Will Severus tell?” She whispered into his chest.

He shook his head, “Sworn to secrecy by Dumbledore.”

Another moment passed in silence.

“I’ll never forgive him, Jamie.”

He sighed, “I’m not expecting you to. I just—promise me that you’ll keep it together, for Moony’s sake.”

“I’m not so sure Remus wants to be around Sirius right now, so that shouldn’t be a problem.”

“And what if Remus chooses to forgive him?” James said as he let her go.

She thought about it, her brain and heart waging a ruthless battle within her tired body.

“Then I’ll respect it, but I won’t change my mind.”

#sirius black x reader #sirius black fluff #sirius black x y/n #sirius black x oc #sirius black fic #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black imagine #sirius black angst #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin x you #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin x oc #remus lupin fic #marauders fanfiction #marauders era x reader #marauders era fic #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin fanfiction

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wolfstarhaven · 1 year

Note

your favorite uni aus please and thank you <3

Hi anon🌸 Since many of my favourite uni!AUs are the same as my absolute favourites in general, you’ll recognise some of these fics from my others rec lists. But I just couldn’t exclude them! Anyway, I tried to include some other gems as well.

* = personal favourite

*Blends, by rvltn909 (191k)

Words got in the way sometimes, but Remus got the sense Sirius knew what he was trying to say.

General themes: slow burn(!!); pining; fluff; light angst; smut; strangers to friends to lovers.

(If you haven’t read blends yet, what are you even doing?)

*talking over cigarettes and drinking coffee, by beep348 (20k)

Remus and Sirius are in the same literature seminar at university and while Remus is great at reading books he is very bad at reading people.

General themes: pining; misunderstandings (remus thinks sirius is dating mary); strangers to friends to lovers; slow burn; fluff.

Size of the Moon, by deadsea (39k)

remus & sirius are dumb (american) college radio co-djs who, of course, often struggle to express feelings through anything but their playlists

General themes: friends to lovers; poor communication.

*Impossible Things, by accioromulus (14k)

It was an impossible thing, living with Remus Lupin--but Sirius was doing it anyway.

General themes: flatmates; pining; slow burn; friends to lovers; soft soft soft.

(Ok yea I know only remus is at uni and it’s not a main focus or anything, so perhaps this shouldn’t count BUT TRY AND STOP ME FROM INCLUDING THIS!! If you haven’t read this already you really must. It’s the law. I don’t make the rules)

Loose Ends, by impossiblemoon (40k)

Sirius Black was perfectly content with living his unremarkable life until he found himself in a chance meeting with the first person he couldn't instantly suss out. Remus Lupin was a complete mystery that captivated Sirius hook, line and sinker.

General themes: light angst; happy ending; breaking up & getting back together; sharing a bed.

Credit No Credit, by halictus (14k)

Remus and Sirius are both applying to graduate school. Whenever they cross paths at program visits, they inevitably hook up. This situation would make more sense to their friends if they weren't supposed to be enemies.

General themes: light enemies to lovers; rivals to lovers?; rivals with benefits; smut; past breakup.

you jump, I jump, by grumposaur (17k)

When Remus witnesses a disturbing event walking home one night, it sends him down a twisted path of many discoveries: secret societies, macabre rituals, cloaked figures, and a dark-haired boy who proves to be the most dangerous of all.

General themes: mystery; journalist!remus; this one is for you dark academia lovers; cults; flirting; happy but open ending.

*lover, you should've come over, by dykesiriusblack (105k)

The story of Remus and Sirius meeting at age 20, falling in love without meaning to, and not knowing how the fuck to deal with it for far too long.

General themes: ANGST! (read the tags!!); depression; chronic pain; happy ending; shitty communication; light enemies to lovers I guess; friends with benefits; on-and-off relationship; slow burn; jealousy.

Suite Nothings: Wolfstar Edition, by femme_de_lettres (61k)

When Remus Lupin was placed into a suite with James Potter, Peter Pettigrew, and Sirius Black for his first year away at college, he didn't have very high expectations. When Sirius Black was placed into a suite with James Potter, Peter Pettigrew, and Remus Lupin for his first year at college, his expectations couldn't have been higher.

General themes: roommates; friends to lovers; some darker themes — read the tags; fluff.

Paper Walls, by Kember (66k)

Have you ever lived with a person you just can’t stand? Everything about them rubs you the wrong way, and yet, you can’t help thinking what it would be like to kiss them… Yeah, welcome to the life of Remus Lupin. He just wants to keep his head down, crack on with his studies, and maybe graduate at some point in the future. But his juvenile crush on his arrogant, impulsive, reckless housemate, Sirius Black, is going to be a major bump in that perfect road.

General themes: light enemies to lovers; not actually enemies tho; flatmates; miscommunication; jealousy; angst and fluff.

got a fascination (with your presentation), by spellingmynamewrong (8k)

When Remus thought of Oxford as a child, he envisioned turrets, laughter, and an unnameable, unforgettable magic. He did not envision vomiting his breakfast all over himself while standing in the halls of St. Catherine’s College.

General themes: meet-cute; pure fluff.

*Ocean of Fiction Blue, orphaned (13k)

Remus Lupin isn't sure what to make of his new flatshare situation. He's a quiet student with a past, who doesn't date and is determined to keep it that way. Then he meets his artist flatmate, Sirius Black and his entire world is turned upside down.

General themes: flatmates; pining; disabled!remus; so sweet.

xx Elliot

#university au #college au #muggle au

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kaaaaaaarf · 11 months

Text

🌒🌓🌔masterlist🌖🌗🌘

hello there! i'm karfy. this blog is 18+. minors dni.

ao3 / spotify / ask me

🌕WIPs🌑

back when we were dinosaurs (3/4) - (E , 26.6k+ words, wolfstar, background marylily, fluff, smut, it's my fictional ode to Toronto) track it under the Museum tag / playlist

Remus is the ROM's newest curator of the paleontological wing. Sirius manages the gift shop and has a dinosaur obsession. They are cute little nerds together and sometimes they have sex in the archives

Nobody parts two rivers met (1/3) - (M, 1k+ words, wolfstar, angst) this is a concept fic based on Liz Phair's album 'Exile in Guyville'. track it here.

A man walks into a bar: Sirius has a good life — he fucks around, not really caring if he ruins the lives of the people he's sleeping with. Remus has been taken advantage of his entire life and keeps finding himself with men who don't really want him. Then they meet and everything changes...or does it?

Savour It (I'm Tasty) (1/?) - (M, 782 words+, wolfstar, sausage roll crack)

He tries to ignore it—really, really tries. He tries to focus on large, skillful hands; on the sweat glistening on warm bronze skin; on the tawny curls falling into lovely brown eyes. But the crumbs.

🌕Completed Fics🌑

The Killing Time (unwillingly mine) (3/3) - (M, 17.5k+ words, wolfstar, background jegulily, tw: murder) track it under the Murder Husbands tag general playlist / chapter two playlist / Remus' horny Sirius playlist / wedding schmood playlist + Series: Love, Blood, and Wham: The Life and Death(s) of Remus J. Lupin

Remus becomes the most prolific serial killer in modern history because Sirius is a slut and won’t stop getting engaged.

You better watch out, You Better Watch Out, YOU BETTER WATCH OUT (A Murder Husbands b-side) - (T, 1.6k words, wolfstar, jegulily, Christmas fic, Regulus POV) + Series: Love, Blood, and Wham: The Life and Death(s) of Remus J. Lupin

A very Murder Husbands Christmas. Remus is obsessed with Santa. Regulus is so, so tired.

Now I'm Spreading Your Legs (with mine in between) - (E, 5k words, wolfstar, texting fic, porn with very little plot, aka my Hatefuck fic) / playlist + Series: When You Open Your Legs

Sirius meets famed rockstar Remus Lupin at a pub and they become arch-enemies who really, secretly want to fuck. James is here for it.

I Got My Spoon (inside your jar) - (E, 10.6k words, wolfstar, porn with very little plot, aka the Hatefuck sequel) / playlist + Series: When You Open Your Legs

Sirius scribbles on the back of his receipt and passes it over the bar. “Can you give this to him when you see him next?” Jamal looks down at the scribbled name and number. “Morrissey?” He smirks as he hands over his credit card. “He’ll know who it is.”

touching me (touching you) - (E, 12k words, wolfstar, porn with an increasing amount of plot, aka Hatefuck part 3) / general playlist / Remus' playlist + Series: When You Open Your Legs

“Right, and what’s with the socks?” Remus holds them in front of him with a frown, like they personally offended him. “I figured you could branch out. If you insist on wearing socks with your boat shoes, they may as well show some personality, since you clearly don’t have one.” “Did you have to get me a pair that says Don't Bully Me I’ll Cum in bright, rainbow lettering?” “...yes, obviously? Isn't that your motto?”

It's So Shameful of Me (I like you) - a Hatefuck b-side - (E, 839 words, wolfstar, Remus POV) + Series: When You Open Your Legs

After a disappointing evening, Remus decides to give Sirius a call.

The More You Ignore Me (the closer I get) - (E, 9.8k words, wolfstar, more plot than porn, aka Hatefuck part 4) / playlist + Series: When You Open Your Legs

After everything that happened that fateful October morning in Remus’ apartment, Sirius thought it might be good to get some much needed distance from Remus. He’d re-activated Grindr as soon as he got home, and was really, strongly thinking about maybe hooking up with someone. Truly, he was going to do it—eventually. He was still thinking about it a week later, and enjoying the relative peace that not having Remus in your life brings—that is, until the phone calls started.

I Had A Dream That You Were Mine - a Hatefuck b-side - (T, 1.1k words, wolfstar, as close to fluff as these fuckers get) + Series: When You Open Your Legs

It’s just after midnight on a random Wednesday in November, and Sirius is perched on a rickety barstool, tucked away in an alcove at the far end of the bar—beer in hand. He's absently tapping his foot to the rhythm of whatever song is blaring through the speakers overhead, trying not to check his watch for the fiftieth time in ten minutes. He's bored, and not entirely sure why he came at all. Well, he thinks, that’s not entirely true—it’s Remus. Remus is the reason he came.

Rolling In The Deep - (E, 750 words, divorced wolfstar, porn with very little plot) + Series: Hatefuck Extended Universe

Somehow, a quick interaction — a hello, now take your stuff and get the fuck out — turned into a screaming match, and before he knew it they were here, fucking on what would have been Sirius' side of the bed before everything went to shit.

Only Get (My Rocks) Off - (E, 2k words, wolfstar, porn with very little plot) + Series: Hatefuck Extended Universe

They say that every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings. Every time Remus has to listen to his neighbour’s fucking drainpipe clink against the side of the house, Remus gets a migraine and a hard-on.

You Grew Tall (I Stayed The Same) - (G, 1400k words, hogwarts era, wolfstar, fluff)

"Don't laugh.” He turns to find Remus scowling in the direction of Sirius’ feet, his back hunched comically low. “I'm not laughing, Moony!” He was definitely laughing, but he really couldn't help it. Remus truly looked ridiculous. Like a baby giraffe, all unsteady, knobby knees. He’d had a growth spurt over the summer (his third in a year) and his school uniform shorts now barely reached mid-thigh.

Ah-Ooh (werewolves of london) - (G, 1k words, hogwarts era, background wolfstar, hurt/comfort if the comfort was a piano)

He flexes his aching fingers and clumsily plays the first few notes of a familiar tune. He sings along, quietly at first, gradually becoming more confident. I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand...

Don't Be Scared (i love you) - (G, 1k words, wolfstar, post first wizarding war, hurt/comfort)

It’s been three years since the end of the war, and Remus still has nightmares so vivid that he forgets where he is. He wakes up dissociating and doesn't know what’s real and what’s not.

my blood is singing with your voice - (M, 750 words, wolfstar, horror, midsommar au) / playlist

Someone is laughing.

In ár gCroíthe go deo - (T, 1k words, wolfstar, irish remus lupin, older wolfstar)

A meditation on the meaning of home, and what it means to long for a place that lives in your bones. Title translates from Irish to "In our hearts forever"

I Knew Your Love Before I Knew Your Name - (G, 380 words, wolfstar, cowboy remus)

Sirius is in a truck with a truly beautiful man.

soft like silk chiffon - (E, 1.8k words, wolfstar, remus in a silk slip) / inspired by this gorgeous drawing by Indi

Remus, who is leaning casual as-you-like against the kitchen counter, wearing the ivory coloured silk slip that Sirius bought him as a joke for his last birthday.

Here I Am (a rabbit-hearted boy) - (G, 664 words, hogwarts era, background wolfstar, wererabbit remus crack)

Remus' tiny body shakes in fear. Finally, after an impossibly long moment, Sirius seems to come back to himself. "R—Remus? Are you—you're a werewolf?" …I'm a what now?

i'm green, you're green - (G, 2.9k words, wolfstar, adaptation of Frog and Toad) / playlist

Once upon a time, not too long ago, there lived a Frog called Sirius and a Toad called Remus. They were neighbours in a beautiful garden. Oh, how they loved one another! They were the truest of friends. These are their adventures.

🌕In Progress🌑

I am currently actively working on several Wolfstar fics that are not yet posted to ao3. You can track updates on my account:

psychopomp (see how it shines) - M. Hades/Charon greek myth au. Sirius is Hades, Remus is Charon. wolfstar. background jily. track it here.

A workplace romance in literal hell.

untitled kidnapping au - M. wolfstar. track it here.

Remus kidnaps the Black brothers and they are both so, so mean to him.

🌕Playlists🌑

All of my playlists are available here.

🌕FAQ🌑

Do you take playlist requests?

Yes! I do!

Can I post your fic to Goodreads (or Storygraph)?

No! You may not!

Can I re-post your fic to third party websites, such as Wattpad?

I posted my work to ao3 (and in one case to my tumblr), and there it shall remain. You do not have my permission to re-post any of my works.

Can I bind your fic?

As long as it's for yourself or as a gift to someone! It must be not-for-profit and please do not use an online (or irl) printing service. I also ask that if you do, that you reach out to me and show me the final product!! I would love to see your binds.

Can I translate your fic into other languages?

I would prefer it if you didn't. Please reach out to me if you want to talk about it, though. There may be certain circumstances where I'd be amenable, but you need to respect it if I say no.

Can I put your fic into an AI generator?

I can't believe I have to say this, but no. Please do not use AI in connection with any of my work. This includes using it to create art based on anything I have created. AI causes harm to artists and authors. Please be cool, you guys.

#pinned post #about me #masterlist #marauders #playlist #epicblueblanket #wolfstar

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