#replace spotify for Apple Music and let’s get this shit

[caramelcleopatraa]

iv. SUIT & TIE

word count : 1,400

x : hey y'all, its the owner of The Bank speaking! Finally got this shit finished, and I'm halfway into part 5 already 💋 Here are the playlists loves! I will actively be adding to these as the story progresses. We got ms. plot in the building as well xo

content : Mafia!Roman Reigns x Designer!Reader, suggestive

Playlists 💋 Spotify Apple Music

“Rommannn! Are you done yet baby?” A high pitched yell on the other side of the door startles you. Roman’s grip on you tightens and you give him a confused look. He plants a tender kiss on your cheek, leaving you a little bit flustered, and he smiles at your flustered expression. His hand pushes your head down on his shoulder and you take a deep breath. 

“Yeah. Just be patient, ok?” Roman says sternly. “But Baaeee! You’ve been in there too lon-” “I’m not finna tell you again. Wait,” Roman says, rubbing the back of his neck. Annoyance was written all over his face. De’arra groans in defeat and the comfortable silence settles back into the atmosphere

‘Pleeaase! Please! Pleeaassee! Don’t let this turn into some drama…’

You let your nails drag across his chest. “Am i gon’ have to worry about her fucking up my shop?” 

“Nah, she all bark no bite,” Roman says, looking down at your hands. “She’s not that petty or jealous.” You look at him with your eyebrow raised. ‘For him to be a ladies man, he should know how petty bitches are. ESPECIALLY when it comes to a man.’ “I hope so. I don’t wanna deal with yo’ loose ends,” You say, getting off of him and standing up to pick your bottoms off of the floor. 

“I got my shit together girl. I already told you i’m not fucking with her. She’s only around me cause her daddy likes my money.” ‘Money? Who’s her dad?’

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*

“The couples are finished.” Aahkilah yells at you from the otherside of the door. Both of you get dressed and clean up the dressing room. You were about to walk out of the room until Roman grabbed your hand and pulled you closer to him. You were going to question why he pulled you away before his hands rose above your head. His hands firmly smooth down your hair and fixed some stray hairs. You couldn’t take your eyes off of him. He handled you with such care and delicacy. You tell him thank you and he responds with a short hum.

 You open the door to greet your clients. Gio and Madison are working as cashiers, ringing both of them up for their suits and dresses. Jey and Jimmy are putting in their payments while Talia and Trinity are talking. “Girl come over here real quick!” You hear Talia yelling at you to come over. From the tone in her voice, you couldn’t tell what this conversation was going to be about. However, you wouldn’t be in the dark for much longer. “Wassup?”

“Girl you ain’t hear?” Trinity says looking at you with a confused face. You shrug your shoulders and replied, “I be busy. Enlighten me.” “There’s a new family trying to replace the Anoa’i family.” Talia crosses her arms and sits into her hip. The blank expression on your face says everything. The Anoa’i family has been managing Florida for decades. To challenge them would be like walking straight into a turf war. Apparently, someone wanted that war. “They’re offering hella bank tryna take their spot too. I wonder if that shit’s fake… or a bluff maybe.” 

“They’ll take that offer back when they realize who they’re messing with,” You mutter to your friends.  Even your family didn’t dare challenge them, because they’re smart enough to know it’ll go every other way but good. Your family, the Semele’s and the Anoa’i family have always been on good terms. The Semele’s don’t own turf however, they are known for having access to a lot of things most mafia’s don't. Your family is known for being suppliers of information, stolen goods, weapons, you name it. So if Reigns is being threatened, that means you could be in trouble too, since everyone knows these two families are tightly tied together. A power duo, if you will. 

“You’re not worried about this?” Trinity’s face is laced with concern for you. You shrugged your shoulders and rolled your eyes. “This could just be a scare tactic, and those don’t work on me,” You said confidently as you gave them a reassuring smile. 

“That’s not something for a pretty lady to worry about. I’ll handle it,” Roman says, looking straight into your eyes. Goddamnit, those eyes. Somehow they made you so flustered. His presence was enough on its own, but his stare was so damn powerful. You were ashamed that someone you had only met an hour ago was making you so giddy and out of character. The tension between you two was thick, and everyone was starting to see it. “You gon’ let me handle it?”

“Well you're not gonna let me handle it?”

“It’s not your problem,” Roman says sternly, deading the conversation then and there. You walk closer to the cashier desk to talk to him directly. “Is this your way of caring for me?” Roman smirks at your comment. “When I said I'd take care of you, I wasn't just talking about that pussy.” Gio and Madison’s jaws drop at his comment. You could see them looking at you through the corner of your eye and you knew you would have to explain what he meant by that. You couldn't hide the smile forming on your face. “You like that?” You didn’t even have to look at him to know that he was smiling. You could hear it all in his tone. “Boy, I’m not playing with you,” you say, walking away, still wearing an existing smile. Roman laughs to himself and hands Gio a stack of cash.

“Neither am I.”

You finished another successful busy day. A shit load of fittings and pickups. Roman had someone pick up all of their suits and dresses, which completed all of your custom orders for the day. Finally, a chance to get off of your feet.

“Ummm what the hell was that this morning?” ‘Ahh shit’. You internally roll your eyes. Eventually, they were gonna bring it up to you. Maybe trying to play dumb was not the best decision on your part.

“What was what?” You innocently bat your eyes at the two ladies. “The smile off you had with your private client. Don’t tell me something went down after I dropped off your drink,” Madison says, sitting down in the swivel chair next to you. You almost muttered a snarky comeback when you were hit with flashbacks from this morning. How he spoke to you and how he touched you kept replaying in your mind. A pool between your legs was forming just from the thought of him. 

“Oh he definitely put it down.” You are quick to defend yourself just as Gio says, “You’re over here in lala land! And at your job too!” Gio acts shocked and puts her hand over her heart and lets out an exaggerated gasp. You hit her in the side and shy away from their investigating eyes. The deafening silence was telling the truth for you. 

“Well we didn’t fuck.. But he did eat my pussy,” you shyly said, still looking away from them. You didn’t have to look at them to know that their mouths were wide open again. What you didn’t know was those open mouths turned into wide smiles. “Ok! Ms. CEO gettin some head! Was it good?”

‘WAS IT GOOD? GOOD’S AN INSULT’ “Um…” 

Before you finished your sentence, Madison interjects with, “Musta been, you looked like you were in a good mood today too. Especially after Roman’s fitting” You regrettably looked back in their direction and saw Madison wiggling her eyebrows. You lightly shove her away from you and stand up. “No, the fitting went well with no complications. That's what I was happy about.” You attempt to defend yourself, but you should’ve known that it was falling on deaf ears. Madison and Gio help you close down and lock up the shop. Of course, Madison had to tell you her two cents before going your separate ways. 

“Look at you smilin-”

“Shut up.”

Welcome to your new addiction

Hi guys, back with part 4 and the playlist that you guys wanted. As always comment and tell me what you think <3

🏷️ tags :) @2-muchsauce @theninthwonder @harmshake @alichesmi @thesamoanqueen @alyyaanna @empressdede @badbitchcentralinc @christinabae @fame-ass-ers @southerngirl41

#roman reigns #roman reigns x black reader #roman reigns smut #roman reigns x y/n #carmenreigns #roman reigns x chubby reader #roman reigns x you #roman reigns x reader #roman reigns x oc #[ ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚✧･ﾟ: * the bankk ✧･ﾟ:* ˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ ] #[ S & T ]

[the-ink-of-roses]

ur recent says ur taking requests but it says closed so I HOPE THIS IS OKAY LOL

Percy Jackson x reader fluff just anything lighthearted and dumb please 😭

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 - 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐲 𝐣𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐬𝐨𝐧

— "like hell! the only one who can get me away from you right now is my mom." ft; late night rain dancing, taylor swift playing, warm towels and a shit ton of kisses from your second favourite person in the whole wide world

a/n: nooooo i'm taking requests, like only ten for now which is why i didnt bother changing thatnjrefh but no, you're perfectly fine <3 i'm so s o f t for percy jackson feel free to send in another request if this isn't what you wanted <3 aaa this is quite literally, my first time writing for the pjo fandom so i hope i dont disappoint

note: percy jackson x gn!reader, they're both well in college, around two years after toa. no specific godly parent for reader mentioned per se, but it's implied the reader doesn't have a mortal family, not prood read, we die like jason grace. warnings: another bad attempt at fluff, spotify terminology (apple music users dni eyeroll emoji /j), brief mentions of sicknesses (cold, cough and fever), sally jackson being a SWEETHEART, a mention of throwing up, surprisingly only one (1) curseword. 815 words !

you squeal in surprise as the rain starts pouring down harder. the winds have become harsher too, but whatever Zeus is pissed about this time around doesn't concern you.

instead, you tug the jacket you and percy are wrapped in closer to yourself, pulling him closer too by extension.

percy's hands slip around your waist, your back to his chest, as he picks you up and gently sways the two of you to the beat of 'love story' by taylor swift while he hums the lyrics under his breath.

he tugs you closer and presses a kiss to your cheek and jaw, resting his head on your shoulder later. you giggle when he does that, turning your head slightly to kiss his forehead.

the playlist probably ran out ages ago, now you two are staying afloat purely on the will of the spotify lords and their music choice, but as long as it's a song that either you or percy know, it works.

( anything works, to be honest, just as long as percy's here, behind you, holding you like you're the one thing he never wants to lose. as long as you have that, you know you've won. as long as percy jackson holds your hand and kisses your cheeks, gods, you'll take anything. )

new rome is fun, it keeps life interesting in a way that doesn't risk you, him and Annabeth going out on quests--and Annabeth having to mock throw up every time you two kiss even if you know she's just as terrified as you two.

swords and running from medusa's sisters ( or medusa sometimes. yeah aunty em was NOT happy last time you met her, apparently she still remembered the store circus thing even if it was more than seven years ago ) were replaced with chasing deadlines and seeing how many energy drinks you guys can stomach.

you're in new york right now, staying at sally's ( when she learnt you were going to spend the holidays in new rome, she demanded her son get you home. no way in hell is estelle's favourite person going to stay alone for the holidays ), and like the two very smart heroes of olympus you two are, you're out here dancing in the rain.

it's a little silly, yeah, but in your absolute defence, this started out as percy trying to teach you how to skateboard before the rain, and neither of you are going to let that ruin a date for you ( by extension let Zeus ruin another date for you, even if this isn't aimed at you ), so you two made the best of both worlds, thanking the gods the speaker piper got for you is waterproof.

with one last strike of thunder, the rain slowly dies down, leaving you and him in the park as the spotify lords finally give up on you two.

percy drops you suddenly and you have only two seconds to squeal in absolute surprise before you're turned around to face him this time. he's grinning at you with a look of absolute mischief--you're sure connor and travis had the exact same look before they shoved you into the pool last time you guys visited camp half blood. of course, percy was in there but something tells you that was their goal.

he looks so pretty you could cry.

and this pure boy, who smiles secretly to you, looks at you like you're the one at the centre of his universe, the one who holds your heart. this same boy has given you his, asking only for your love in return, something you're more than happy to give him.

before you can ask him what he's up to, percy suddenly shakes his hair, causing all the water to fly everywhere, including on you.

you almost yell in surprise but with a small chuckle bite back. doing the same, as both of you laugh while shaking your heads to have the water droplets go around everywhere.

it's probably a weird sight to watch--two teenagers, drenched in water, shaking their heads like there's no tomorrow while holding each other, but you don't really give four fucks.

once your head starts hurting, you stop and cup percy's face, getting him to stop as well. your other hand slides into his hair, messing it up further as the hand on his face guides him for a kiss.

he lifts you up again and twirls you--no doubt to get another laugh out of you--before setting you down.

percy doesn't let go of your hand either, not when you pick up your stuff and head to sally's (your current favourite person in the world), not while the two of you are lectured by her on colds coughs and fevers in this weather, not even when warm towels are given to the two of you.

that makes you almost as warm as sally's hot chocolate did.

#percy jackson x reader #percy jackson #post hoo #hoo #rose's thorns #percy jackon and the olympians #sally jackson stan account #cw rain #pjo #hereos of olympus #heroes of olympus #half divine

[ferns]

literally just complaining below the cut. tl;dr: apple uses iOS to control what iphone & ipad users can do with their products & it’s literally an evil of capitalist “innovation” & also it is causing me specifically problems.

i’m living in hell & it’s literally my own fault for owning an ipad & using tumblr but i literally want either for apple software designers to kill themselves or for the tumblr mobile app to run in a way that doesn’t suck. my problem is this: my ipad is a tablet that i use for a lot of my everyday activities. it has a keyboard & shit. IN THEORY, it should be capable of replacing my computer. 

which it does, for some things, but there are a lot of things it can’t do because it runs on iOS (the apple mobile operating system) rather than the macOS, which is what apple computers run on. this means that while it is huge & beautiful & has great graphics or whatever, it’s got the technological capabilities of an iphone rather than a laptop. a few of the key differences: i cannot download applications unless they are offered by the apple store or unless i jailbreak my ipad. jailbreaking is the process of (paraphrased from wikihow to jailbreak an ipad) going against apple’s terms of service to access an ipad’s software & gain  superuser permissions & root access. the benefits of doing so are many & varied, many of which have to do with greater control over customization & the ability to run non-apple programs on the ipad. 

BUT. i have not jailbroken my ipad because there are significant downsides, including but not limited to: it absolutely voids the warranty. it prevents updates to the existing operating system FOREVER like so if i were to jailbreak my ipad right now & then they finally fucking did something to improve the battery life drain of the OS, i couldn’t get it. & also straight-up if one does not know what one is doing with a jailbreak it could literally just make it stop working (which would literally be a disaster, given the whole Voids the warranty thing mentioned above). but i’m not happy about it. in fact: i am MAD because.

the reason that apple makes it like that is because it’s more profitable for them for multiple reasons. first, any applications purchased must run though the app store & they are taking a cut of that shit. no-brainer. but on another level it is training people to be more dependent on apple software & to accept the level of control apple has over any user activity in iOS. it’s like a chromebook level of bullshit. you cannot use anything that isn’t proprietary! insane! that’s literally the opposite of what a computer should do! & yet jailbreaking it would not solve all my problems because it would just create other, different problems.

so here i am. ipad unjailbroken & running on iOS. the reason that i am super fucking mad today is not even a huge problem but it is an issue that literally just does not exist on my actual laptop. the thing is: the tumblr app sucks & we all know it, & also it is optimized (for a given value of that, given how shitty it is) for…mobile…for a mobile phone. if you don’t have an ipad but do use the tumblr app on your phone, let me tell you: the ipad tumblr app is literally. like it’s a step down somehow. bad even by tumblr standards. so! i do not fucking use it. & because i don’t use the tumblr app, i run tumblr in a browser: the firefox app for iOS. here is my problem: iOS routes the tumblr messenger sound effects from the firefox app through the priority system like any other sound from a browser window, which means that if a new source of audio engages while one is running in the background from another program it pauses the old one on the assumption that the new one is supposed to replace the old one, which means that means that if i am listening to spotify & i get a tumblr message it pauses my song & doesn’t turn it back on even after the notif noise ends.

WHICH IS SOOOOOOO STUPID!! THAT’S SO FUCKING STUPID…it doesn’t even run the tumblr noise over the music or anything it just stops it. & get this. GET THIS. because i am accessing tumblr through a browser app, tumblr doesn’t let me turn off notification noises! i can’t even mute individual tabs like i would on desktop firefox because it’s a mobile app! if either apple OR tumblr were an iota more competent this wouldn’t be happening but they both suck shit & should die!!!!!!!! 

if you read this far i love you & am kissing you on the lips. embarrassing that this is so long i had to put paragraph breaks but i DID; this post is dedicated to all nosy people who like to read their mutuals’ long ranting posts but also have ADHD. thankyou

#letters #if the readmore doesn’t work the irony is going to kill me

[x--daughters-of-darkness--x]

Employed To Serve are putting British metal back on top

For the past decade, Justine Jones and Sammy Urwin of Employed To Serve have helped elevate British rock and metal both on and off the stage, from Album Of The Year releases to their championing of new bands. Now, with fourth full-length Conquering on the horizon, the pay-off is being felt across the entire scene…

Some years ago now, at the end of her last job in retail, Justine Jones made a decision. Providing she could eat and had a roof over her head, she wasn’t, she told herself, going to spend her life doing anything that was “un-fun”. Instead, Justine decided, she’d navigate the world by working hard on the things she loved and that she truly believed in.

“I’ve never been content to be a cog,” she says. ​“I’ve always wanted to be like a very heavily involved person. I like having a say, I guess. I’ve never liked having a manager, in terms of work. I have got that childish, rebellious thing, like, ​‘Don’t tell me what to do.’”

Employed To Serve are not cogs. Nor are Justine and guitarist Sammy Urwin ones to sit around and wait for the lights to go green. With what the singer calls ​“our Hatebreed, perseverance attitude”, a self-starting, hands-dirty, DIY ethos that’s as much about enthusiasm for music and building a scene as it is firing up pits, they have become one of the most exciting British metal bands of the past decade. When Oli Sykes invited them to join the Bring Me The Horizon-curated All Points East festival two summers ago, he noted that they were ​“one of the few heavy bands around who I actually like”.

Kerrang! had got there before him, mind. In 2017, we crowned Employed To Serve’s second album, The Warmth Of A Dying Sun, our Album Of The Year. Its follow-up, 2019’s Eternal Forward Motion, was awarded a full 5K rating and a spot on our front cover, their second. When they gave us the nod a while ago that they were about to drop the first single from their brilliant fourth album, Conquering, coming this September, we didn’t even need to think about giving them a third.

Like Oli’s band, there’s an energy to Employed To Serve, an orbit around them that feels like it’s pulling in other bands, linking seemingly unlinked outfits together through sheer enthusiasm. Beyond the band, offstage, Justine and Sammy run Church Road Records from their home in the Surrey commuter town of Woking (a place notably annihilated by Martians in H.G. Wells’ War Of The Worlds). Through this, they can sign and put out music by bands that they like: the only real signing policy amounting to ​“bands that excite me”, says Justine. There’s as much gratefulness towards the artists they release – Svalbard, Palm Reader, Cruelty, to name but three – for trusting them to look after their records, as there is to anyone who gives their own band the time of day.

“As cheesy as it sounds, we’re lifers,” says Justine. ​“I love music. I love releasing it. I love that I do it for a full time job. I love playing live. First and foremost, we are music fans. Obviously, we love being in a band and stuff. But we just live and breathe music.”

As with so many things for so many people, the depth of this dedication was thrown into sharp focus as COVID took hold last year. At the end of 2019, Employed To Serve were on a winning streak. Eternal Forward Motion was one of the year’s most acclaimed releases, they band had spent a month on the road with Bury Tomorrow in Europe and the UK, and on New Year’s Eve, Sammy and Justine put a bow on their long-term relationship by tying the knot. In March 2020, just before lockdown ended touring for everyone, the band’s UK headlining run just about snuck in, and saw them sell out London’s Camden Underworld, a show that ended in chaos with the audience onstage triumphantly carrying Sammy on their shoulders.

When things ground to a halt, the gap left was palpable. Once source of reflection came in taking stock in what the band had achieved, while also having to find a replacement for guitarist Richard Jacobs. It’s an exercise the pair are admittedly used to, to the point where Justine says, ​“We probably look like dictators, like it’s the Sammy and Justine show.”

To wit, keen observers will note that they are the only members of Employed To Serve to be on both this Kerrang! cover and the last one. There’s no bad blood anywhere – Richard left to move to Japan with his wife, drummer Robbie Back has become a dad, bassist Marcus Gooda went on to focus on other things – it was simply the wage of getting older in a band. When life’s forks come up, you have to make a choice. For Sammy and Justine, the choice just happens to be to stay the course. Three new members have been drafted into the band – guitarist David Porter, bassist Nathan Pryor and drummer Casey McHale – but it still provided a moment of reflection for what was actually important.

Another, more serious bit of stock-taking came last September, when Justine resigned from her job as a label manager at Holy Roar records, after serious assault allegations were made against the label’s owner. Soon after, that label folded entirely.

But in both cases, where events could have sown doubt or caused serious damage, things instead bloomed. And so, Sammy and Justine turned Church Road – a small concern of Sammy’s for years already – into a full-time occupation and livelihood, taking on Holy Roar releases already on the slate and pressed, and releasing them herself. In the case of their first release, Svalbard’s When I Die, Will I Get Better?, there was barely a month to move everything over, and yet it still hit the shelves on the day it was always intended to. Because, looking back, it’s almost like there was no other consideration than to carry on.

“When everything happened, I thought, ​‘Maybe I could go to a bigger label or something.’ But that’s not where my heart is,” says Justine. ​“My heart is in finding bands in tiny little venues and then helping them grow into their second hours and stuff. And it’s just more fun. Obviously, it’s very scary [running your own label], and I’ve spent a lot of this past year very stressed. But I don’t have to answer to anyone – I just do the best I can for the bands because I love them. My favourite thing is sitting on Bandcamp with a coffee or a beer, and going through each genre finding the best bands of that day, or going through Apple Music or Spotify and finding new bands. It has been like that since I was a kid. So doing a record label just makes sense.

“Obviously I wish it was under better circumstances, but COVID has been almost like a blessing for this band, because it’s helped us regroup,” she continues. ​“It made us take stock of all the cool shit we’ve been lucky enough to do. Because sometimes when you get caught in the rat race of everything, you’re never really living in the moment. And then COVID happens, and you think, ​‘What do I miss?’ Friends, family, playing shows. And I’m like, ​‘Cool, I’m doing the right thing. Let’s get back to it.’”

For Justine, this meant becoming the boss. For Sammy, already a music obsessive with an apparent addiction to both old-school death metal and playing guitar in as many bands as possible as a member of Renounced and Motormouth (as well as playing in Glorious with Justine), it was an opportunity to dedicate his life to his passion even further. A gardener by trade, he’d lately found himself wondering what was beyond it.

“I was doing gardening work on and off for the last 10 or so years. I enjoyed the work, but sometimes I would kind of find myself being a little bit like, ​‘What’s the five-year plan?’” he says. ​“I’ll always do the band. But we got a few members going off and doing other stuff. I knew I had to find something else to do, because I wanted to do something in music that also fit around being in the band. I just knew I wanted to be with like-minded people talking about music all day.”

Sammy and Justine talk about music a lot. Get Sammy started on metal, and his enthusiasm quickly runs away with him. For Justine, their impending gig at Download Pilot a couple of days after our interview is as much about watching everyone else as it is their own show. Though one of the heaviest bands on the line-up, as a showcase of the breadth of rising talent the British rock scene has, appearing on the same ticket as Enter Shikari, Trash Boat, Creeper, Boston Manor, Neck Deep, Loathe and Conjurer is a large-scale version of what they’ve been driving at for years.

“It’s so funny, because it kind of sounds weird, but within the British scene, it makes total sense,” says Justine. ​“It’s a very rich scene at a minute, and it’s for all spectrums. You have bands like Orchards and Gender Roles on the Big Scary Monsters label, but equally, there’s loads of heavier bands, too. Everyone knows how hard it can be being a British band, because it’s hard to get over to America. And now, unfortunately, it’s gonna be hard to get to Europe [after Brexit]. So everyone’s got this thing like, ​‘We’re this little island here and we need to stick together and support each other.’ It’s a nice collective, and a moment in time to be a part of.”

“Even though we’ve written a more metal record [with Conquering] for us, that’s definitely not a statement of us closing the door,” says Sammy. ​“Obviously we’d love to tour with Gojira or Lamb Of God or something like that. But if Creeper came to us and said, ​‘Do you want to tour with us?’ we’d say yes.”

It was on such a line-up that Justine first appeared on the cover of Kerrang!, alongside Becky Blomfield of much-missed alt.punks Milk Teeth, with whom ETS were touring at the time. It not only showed two rising talents in the British scene, but also how well such different ends of it slotted together. Which was kind of the point.

“We were like the little metal sandwich in that tour,” says Justine. ​“But we worked well, because it was an example of this sort of British scene that’s going on at the moment.”

“People turned up who would be wearing ETS T‑shirts, and then singing along with Milk Teeth and vice versa,” says Sammy. ​“That’s so cool to see. Obviously there’s still a little bit of gatekeeping going on in the world of metal. But, for me, that was a really good sign of a shift.”

“It makes total sense. I don’t know why it’s not more of a thing, having mixed bills like that,” says Justine. ​“Everyone in our generation grew up listening to Slipknot and blink-182; two polarising bands, but it makes total sense. I listen to both of them religiously. So that actually kind of makes sense in a bill. It’s literally a music fan’s show. I remember Thursday opening for My Chemical Romance at Wembley on The Black Parade tour when I was 14, and Reuben opening for Billy Talent as well. I literally got to get into heavier stuff from those mixed line-ups.”

Put it to either of them that between their music, DIY attitude and simple lust for wanting to marshall a scene without walls, Employed To Serve could be called leaders, or at least the setters of examples for others to follow, and it’s a compliment they’ll take, but also something that they don’t want to take too much credit for.

“I mean, it’s for others to say, isn’t it?” says Justine. ​“We just have mental to-do list of stuff we want to achieve. And if that inspires people, that’s sick. It’s never like we try to be the leaders or anything.

“At the end of the day, I love the idea of kids getting into metal because of us and vice versa.”

As such an entry point, Conquering is a very good one. Ultra heavy and explosive, it leans even further into Sammy’s love of death metal OGs like Morbid Angel and Death, plus classic thrash, with shredding solos everywhere, as well as more vocals from the guitarist. And not even changing three-fifths of the band since their last album has had anything other than a sharpening effect. Fundamentally, Conquering is exciting, full of energy, and powered by a deep-set love for simply doing it.

“The floodgates have been opened, I guess, in terms of wearing our influences for this record on our sleeve,” says Sammy. ​“I like to think we still maintain the ETS that was there before, but it’s obvious that during lockdown and leading up to this record, for me it was about early Machine Head and Testament and Exodus and stuff. I feel like this is our chance to show that side of us a bit more.”

“It’s where I feel at home, as well, because I grew up listening to early Lamb of God and ​’90s-era Roadrunner Records bands,” adds Justine. ​“Straight-up metal, but not straight-up metal in the sense that we’re doing it by numbers. We sound like us, but there are more choruses and solos.”

“Lyrically, it’s similar to Eternal Forward Motion and touching on some pretty bleak stuff, but for the most part we tried to put a positive spin on it,” says Sammy. ​“I wanted put all of that energy into something positive. I didn’t want to say the same things again, because I didn’t want to make it sound like it’s the same record. I’d say it’s an even more positive record than before.”

The day we meet for this interview, long after the tape recorder goes off, conversation about bands and music continues into the small hours. Three days later, at Download, as Sammy chucks himself into the crowd at the end of the band’s set and Justine alternates between roaring her head off and smiling her face off, the delight in all this is self-evident. Employed To Serve are one of the best metal bands in the country – one of the best bands full stop, in fact – but on a broader scale, they also act as a reflection of an emerging wave of bands for whom being in a band is an act of joy, of doing something with your life, of not settling for things that are, as Justine says, ​“un-fun”.

“Stuff in the band does get to you sometimes and you do get grouchy or whatever,” admits Sammy. ​“But we realised that we’re also very fortunate people who have played with people that have become our best friends. It’s about taking stock and being like, ​‘This is fun.’ That’s what the album is about. It’s about not letting things in your life get the better of you. Because sometimes they do, and you find yourself getting all aggy, and you’re only doing yourself a disservice at that point, really.”

“I think Henry Rollins said, ​‘Tenacity over talent,’” says Justine. ​“We work hard, but it’s tenacity. You could be the sickest guitar player but just sit in your bedroom and never play a show. No.”

“I mean, I do set myself up for it, where I’m kind of pulling my hair out,” adds Sammy. ​“I’ve had times where I’ve had three or four band practices a week. And there’s a gig this night, and a gig that night, and I’ve got to do this, that and the other. But you’ve gotta be in it to win it. And when a cool gig comes about, or cool tour comes about, or you’re just really happy with what you recorded, that’s when you know it’s worth it.”

As they say themselves, Justine and Sammy are lifers. As other members leave to start families or move abroad to begin the next chapter of their lives, rather than feeling left behind, it’s almost made them realise even more quite what a special thing they have.

When it brings you as much happiness as doing this clearly does, what else do you need? And anyway, it’s worth it to not simply be a cog.

#Justine Jones #Employed To Serve #2021 interviews

[bbyboybrock--archived]

Serendipity (C.B) | Chapter 17

Summary: Serendipity: (n) the chance occurrence of events in a beneficial way

Popular youtuber Isabella Hart, known as Bella to her audience, bends over backwards to separate her youtube life from her private life. Known for her overall clean content and her bubbly attitude, Isabella has a wild side to her that only those inside the youtube community know about. When Bella meets Colby during one of the trap house parties she finally meets someone she can be her genuine self with. When trouble arises after their meeting, will Bella be able to hand the pressure or will she destroy her relationship with Colby as well as herself in the process. [This starts in 2018]

Written: 2019

Word Count: 2,396

Warnings: swearing

Serendipity Masterlist

We all sit around the tv joking around and hanging out. The whole house is in the living room trying to plan the last trap house party. Devyn, Kat, and Tori are all busy doing other stuff so I'm the only girl in the room. Brennen is also here because he is apparently the best party planner they know. I made sure to sandwich myself in between Colby and Jake so Brennen couldn't sit next to me. The only reason why I'm here is because Colby and I have to go over to the new apartment building later to sign a few more papers and then Colby promised to go furniture shopping with me.

They've been planning for over 30 minutes. The only thing they can agree on is this has to be the best party they've ever thrown. They're arguing if the party should be BYOB or open bar. The same argument that they have every time they plan a party,

"Listen, Elton's 1 million subscribers party was 'bring your own booze' and it was still a great hit," Aaron argues. We managed to get him to stop screaming long enough to help us.

"Yeah, but we can get more people to come if we offer drinks ourselves." Jake fired back.

"Okay but you guys are going to be hemorrhaging money on drinks alone if you think what you're going to buy is going to be enough for the number of people you want," I say before taking a sip of my water.

"Why don't you chip in?" Corey asked.

"I don't live here dipshit and this is your guys' big party. I'm only here because you clearly need a woman's logic. Devyn is lucky she doesn't have to sit through this." I joke back.

"What about the Christmas party you threw?"

"You guys said I could borrow the house. Plus it was a small party where I paid for everything. All the alcohol that we got was enough for everyone that I invited. You basically want to invite all of LA to your here. I don't even know how you're going to accommodate everyone on your guest list."

This started to spark a conversation on what they're going to do for entertainment. I laugh as they all argue about getting a DJ or just creating a playlist on Spotify. I only stop paying attention when Colby places his hand on my lap. He whispers that he has to go take a call from his mom. He kisses me on the cheek before leaving me with the rest of the idiots.

"Okay, I need a break from all this testosterone. I'm going to raid everybody's snacks!" I say getting up and walking into the kitchen. I hear a lot of protests as I leave but none of them actually stop me from eating their food. They know I'll either replace it or get them real food later.

I take one of Sam's Dr. Peppers from Colby's birthday prank months ago. His supply is finally getting low and he has been begging for people to take some. I place the can and start going through everyone's cubbies. I could just make something from the fridge but you only make the mistake of opening that once before you fear it. The girls and I spent one weekend cleaning it and making it smell nice but the smell had returned by the next morning.

I finally find some chips in Corey's stash and cookies in Jakes. I set all my things on the counter. As I pull out my phone and begin to Venmo Corey and Jake I feel someone press up against me. I can tell right away it's not Colby.

"Brennen, what did I say about personal space?" I say after turning around and shoving him off me.

"You didn't care about me being in your personal space when we were 'hanging out.' Maybe we should hang out some more." Brennen steps closer and forces me to step back. I set my phone on the counter in case I need to use both of my hands to push him away.

"I've told you countless times, that relationship between us is over. It ended when I found out that you were dating Kira and it has been that way since before I got with Colby."

"Colby won't mind. He's seen how you were before. You think that you suddenly can change?"

"Leave me alone." I shove past him and start walking to the living room.

"I went through all that trouble to leak that shit and I'm still going to get nothing? That's bullshit." He whispered under his breath.

"Excuse me? You're the one who did that?" I ball my fist in anger.

"Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. Who's going to believe you."

"You... asshole!" I began pushing Brennen backward until he was pressed against the counter.

When I couldn't push him further I began punching and kicking him. I couldn't hit him hard enough to actually hurt him, I don't have it in me. But all the pain and anger that I never really what to do with is finally coming out. I can feel tears coming out of my face. I can hear Brennen screaming for help and the sound of footsteps. I feel arms wrap around my waist and pull me away from Brennen. I try to pull away. I don't care how the situation looks like the everyone else, Brennen deserves it.

"Colby, calm your bitch down!" Brennen yells after I get pulled off him. A various of 'whoas' are heard from everyone. Colby makes his way to the front and stands between us.

"Watch your mouth, Brennen. Now, what's going on?" Colby asks looking between us.

"Do you want to tell them Brennen or should I?" I calmed down a little bit. I'm only fighting whoever is holding me because I hate the feeling of being restrained.

"I-I don't know man. We were just talking and she started attacking me. Maybe she's on her period or something." He avoids eye contact with me.

"Really Brennen? You don't want to tell them anything else? You don't want to tell them about how you constantly hit me up asking to hookup? Or how you always get really handsy with me, even when Colby is around? What about the fact that I was hitting you because you're the one who leaked those pictures and videos of me?" I watch as fear shows visibly on his face.

"You did what?"

"Yo, wait a minute, let me explain. I didn't think that it would be that big of a deal."

"Do you have any idea what you put your best friend through? What you almost put your friends through? You caused me to almost lose my job entirely. You got me kicked out of my family. I can't believe you cared more about the slightest possibility of getting your dick wet was more important than the feelings and lives of anyone but yourself. I tried to kill myself, Brennen. If Colby hadn't come when he did— If Colby had been late or waited—" I hadn't realized that I started crying again.

"Yo, Jake, let her go." I hear Corey whisper behind me. Jake slowly releases me and I walk in between Colby and Brennen and looked him in the eyes.

"Did you honestly think that when you leaked those pictures and videos that Colby would break up with me and I would just go back to sleeping with you?"

"At the time I did but—" I cut Brennen off by slapping him hard across his face. It was so loud that there was a slight echo.

"Go to hell Brennen," I say before walking out of the kitchen. Aaron and Sam moved out of my way without me having to tell them.

I walk straight through the front door and out of the front gate and begin walking. A walk will cool me down. I'm madder than anything. I keep walking straight in a direction that I don't know that well. How could Brennen do something like this to someone who he considered his best friend? How could he hurt Colby like that? I probably shouldn't have left Colby alone with him. Hell, I probably shouldn't have left any of the guys alone with him. Who knows what they'll do, especially since they heard the news that I almost died for the first time today. I should go back but I honestly don't want the chance to see Brennen again.

****

I've been walking for at least 30 minutes and I have no idea where I am. I was walking around and making turns without even thinking for at least 15 minutes. I realized about 5 minutes ago that I didn't have my phone or wallet so I'm kind of screwed. I'm reminded that I have my apple watch when I get a notification from Colby asking where I was. I managed to share my location with him and sit on the curb and wait for him. I've definitely calmed down. I've had time to process everything. I've never been so mad in my life nor have I hit anyone.

A few minutes I watch as Colby parks his car and walk out and engulf me in a hug. We walk back to the car and I see that Colby grabbed my backpack and filled it with the snacks I grabbed earlier, phone, jacket, wallet, and my camera equipment. He lowered his music.

"Why didn't you tell me about everything with you and Brennen?" Colby asks quietly. I can tell he's not sure if I'm going to answer or if I even want to talk now.

"You have to understand that this was after I told my mom what was happening with my dad. I didn't want to put in another position where I wasn't believed. I also didn't want to look like one of those girlfriends who makes her boyfriend not hang out with certain friends because she didn't like them. I thought I could just hang around him because you guys were close and he would leave me alone. I need you to know that I never cheated on you."

"I know you wouldn't. I'm just sorry that I didn't realize that any of this was happening. Just tell me when you feel uncomfortable with someone if that ever happens again."

"I will. I'm working on it. What happened after I left?" I prop my feel up on the dashboard and start eating my snacks.

"Well, Corey and I nearly beat the shit out of Brennen. He tried playing the victim. We gave you a few minute head start before we kicked him out in case you ran into him. We told Brennen to lose our numbers and unfollowed him on everything. After that, I had to explain to everyone what happened a few months ago. Sam already knew so he helped me out a bit. I knew you needed to be alone for a bit to calm down."

"Thanks. And sorry for reacting like that. I was just so angry. I'm sorry about ruining Brobly."

"Hey, don't ever apologize for feeling your feelings. We've talked about this. Anyway, I don't care too much about Brobly. I always felt that Brennen was using me for views but I never really had evidence."

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing! Life's too short to be apologizing for every little thing. Let's go do the shit we need to do and then spend the rest of the day at the mall or something." Colby said before turning up the music and grabbing my hand as he drives.

****

"Baby, my wallet hurts," I complain during the drive back to my apartment. As promised, after we filmed at Ikea, Colby took me to the mall where I did some retail therapy. After getting rid of more than half my clothes I had to restock. We walked around the mall for a bit and bought some things, but the real problem was when we got to Target.

"I told you going to Target was a bad idea. You have absolutely no impulse control when we go there."

"To be fair, not everything I bought was for me. There was a sale on Jake's favorite candy in bulk so I got him that. And then I remember Sam saying that he need tape for his boxes and I figured nobody would have tape so I got enough for all of us. And then this morning I finished one of Corey's snacks so I had to replace it. Devyn's needed another makeup bag and they were having a buy one get one sale so I got one for Kat because I don't need one. And then I know that Aaron and Tori wanted to see this movie but were having trouble finding it but I saw it was on sale. And well, I may or may have not broken your headphones so I got you a replacement." I organize the bags that I have in my lap as I talk about everything.

"Izzy, we talked about this." Colby strokes my hair but doesn't take his eyes off the road.

"I know, I know. My hearts too big, I can't function without doing something nice. Besides, I feel bad about how I reacted in front of them early when the whole Brennen situation and at the shocking revelation I made." I still want to kick Brennen's ass. I probably would have if I wasn't stopped.

"I can't tell if you're trying to bribe our friends or distract them by buying them stuff. You know, they're going to want to talk about it? Well, maybe only Sam will. Jake will avoid talking about it but be weird around you for a bit. Aaron and Corey won't bring it up but watch over you like a hawk."

"Which is why I'm bribing AND distracting them. Plus, I'm having you drop me off and you give them the things I bought them so I can avoid even more awkwardness. Get with the program babe."

"I figured that's what your plan was when you asked me to take you to your apartment when we left the mall. Anyway, let me get some food in you before you get hangry."

#colby #colby brock #colby fanfic #colby fan fic #colby fanfiction #colby fan fiction #colby brock fanfic #colby brock fan fic #colby brock fanfiction #colby brock fan fiction

[waywardsonraisedfromperdition]

Lion King Live Action

I wanted to put my thoughts out there now that I’ve seen the film, since so many others seem to be doing the same.

Spoilers down below! I’m on mobile so I don’t think I can make a cut.

A long rant is ahead, but for a TL;DR, I genuinely loved this movie. Okay, let’s go!

Okay, so first of all, the scenery.

This movie, honestly, was gorgeous. Yes, it didn’t have the same color saturation that the original had. I’m not sure why everyone expected it to, since it’s “live action” and not a cartoon. You can’t expect them to warp the reality of what Africa is to remake the original movie. It was never intended to be a carbon copy of the original, with the same coloration and everything. Yes, they shared frames and dialogue, but this was intended to be real animals and real Africa. It was still, to me, breathtakingly gorgeous at times, and I found my jaw dropping more than once. The opening scene was amazing!

Now I will say, yes I do wish the animals had more expression. That being said, the music combined with the phenomenal voice acting and tone of voice amplified those small facial changes that the animals did have, which did allow at least me personally to see the emotion in the animals. Some may struggle with it, and some may not. I think it just comes down to personal preference at that point. I feel like the ears could’ve played a bigger role, as anyone who has a cat or has seen a cat knows, cats use their ears for emotion a LOT.

However, the character design was still fantastic. I was particularly fond of the markings adult Simba had on his face; they resembled his mother’s facial features, and I really liked that.

Now for the dynamic duo. Timon and Pumbaa are fucking hilarious, honestly. They altered the original dialogue enough to make them absolutely hysterical (again, this is subjective).

There was a line in Hakuna Matata where instead of stopping Pumbaa before he said farted, Timon let him say it.

“Aren’t you gonna stop me?!”

“No! You disgust me!”

When I tell you I lost my shit.

Honestly, I know he didn’t voice Timon, but every line he spoke, I could hear in John Mulaneys voice. It was funny, lighthearted and more than I’d expected from them. I adored them.

Beyoncé killed it, not like y’all even had a doubt.

Speaking of the music, I do believe Hans Zimmers original score was also in this movie, which for those of you who know the backstory, you’ll know how significant this is. If you don’t, or if you’d like more of The Lion Kings history, I suggest the Bippity Boppity Bros podcast, available on Spotify and Apple (not sponsored, I just really love Brian Hull). And for those of you wondering, that very first, iconic note in the Circle of Life? It hit. It SLAPPED. It was perfect, IMO.

But lemme talk about Rafiki for a second. I LOVED Rafiki.

This Rafiki reminded me why Rafiki had been my favorite character in the first movie. I felt like I was seeing an old friend, and the way they did him was spectacular.

I fear I may get this incorrect, and I did search but didn’t find out exactly which language Rafiki spoke, though I think it was Swahili. If someone finds out, please don’t hesitate to correct me!

He played a more muted role, and I felt like I could’ve done with more of him on the screen, but he was every bit the Rafiki I loved as a child nonetheless. I didn’t get to see the “Squash Banana” bit, but I feel like it’s probably because they wanted to make him a bit more mystical and mysterious. I wish I’d seen it, but I still loved him.

He also didn’t carry his staff until the final battle. He pulls it from the tree and beats hyena ass with it. It’s pretty sick, honestly 🤷🏻‍♀️

All in all, though I went in fully prepared to hate this movie, I couldn’t find myself hating it. James Earl Jones playing Mufasa, Donald Glover singing the HELL out of Hakuna Matata, Beyoncé killing it. Rafiki being as amazing as I felt he was? I couldn’t hate this film.

You may still hate this movie, and that’s okay. But for those of you on the fence, please. Do go see this movie. You may genuinely enjoy yourself, the way I did. It will never be the original, but it was never meant to be, never meant to replace it.

I genuinely, wholeheartedly, and undoubtedly loved this movie.

(I also recommend Brian Hull’s review ; he went in fully expecting to hate it too! He puts it into fantastic words)

#lion king 2019 #disneys lion king #the lion king #disney #disney animation #lion king spoilers #lion king 2019 spoilers

[craborb]

@thisdaymorning tagged (”tagged”) me on a thing but i’m doing it my way which is to answer 6/11 questions posed lol

anyway the rules to this were supposed to be:

Rule 1: Always post the rules.

Rule 2: Answer questions that are given to you, then write new ones.

Rule 3: Tag 11 people.

Rule 4: Let them know you tagged them.

Rule 5: Don’t change the rules.

1. What’s the most embarrassed you’ve ever been?

i hate this i don’t even wanna start to think of embarrassing moments i get embarrassed easily so. but i think the worst is when i say something and i immediately know that it didn’t come out the way that i meant it to sound and in the moment have no idea how to be like wow i’m sorry idk why i said that and in that way i’m so sorry i just end up playing along with my damn self and i lay in bed at night thinking about how can i casually bring it up in a future conversation like hey remember that time i said that thing that clearly put you on the spot and i didn’t mean to do that well i’m sorry i just was upset and didn’t know how to communicate that. so yeah

2. Describe the best meal of your life.

this isn’t the best meal of my life but i was talking about cracker barrel the other day and i remembered this orange marmalade pork chop i had there one time, one of the very few times i’ve ever been there there aren’t any cracker barrels in ny lol but yeah i remembered it and remembered how i was so into it and like kept looking up recipes to recreate it at home

(i’m skipping 3-5)

6. Have you ever lost something you really loved (an object)?

so many things, but one is my ipod. i found it! like some time last year! i definitely found it at my mom’s house, but i have no idea where i put it since that day. like. no idea. and the chances that someone in my family threw it out is WAY too high. which is infuriating bc that was like 200gbs of music and the rarity of the mp3s on that thing, oh man. rare shit i could only find on soulseek or some shit. and the harddrive that i had all that music on, dead. so that was it! fuck man!

7. Who’s your favorite family member? Why?

i really fuck w my nieces and nephews. i have a whole tribe of em, they all rule in their own way. love em. i really fux w emmmmm

skipping 8

9. What’s the nicest thing someone can do for you?

just give me love and affection stupid show me that you care spend time with me trust me communicate how you feel let me in stupid

10. Do you have any surprising hobbies? 

uh idk about hobbies but i started getting really obsessed with highlighter recently lol like i’m not buying any i’m being good but like if i had an unlimited amount of funds i’d have mad highlighter rn i’d be shimmer from head to toe i’d be blinding lmao 

skipping 11

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

here’s 5 other questions replacing the other ones:

3. what’s your favorite piece of clothing atm?

4. what’s an album not on spotify/apple music that you really wish was?

5. are you hoarding/saving anything rn that you should probably throw out? if so what is it?

8. do you have a musical artist who’s had very distinctively different periods in their career and you hated one period but loved another?

11. show me a pic on your phone you wanna show me

i’m tagging anyone who sees this just tag me when you do it so i can see

[imurjoys]

Hey so this is random as shit! But lol I’ve been in the rp community for like 12 years. I’ve watched it change from a beautiful community of likeminded and open minded people who loved and supported all writers no matter race, sexuality, gender expression, writing abilities, or English and grammar skills. But I don’t think I have to tell y’all how much has changed. It’s a hateful wasteland out there, but yeah I just wanted to say that I’m now an actor/musician and stuff. I have a lot of gigs lined up and I’ve been trying my best to give back to everyone who helped made me. Well, I can’t think of nothing more than the rp community. Y’all gave me a home when I never knew of one. So, thank you and please anyone who wants to connect/work together/collab/link up/get a promo or shoutout/or hell even just be friends and talk about the good ole rp days I’m your man. I don’t really use tumble anymore except to stalk 😂 so my socials are endlesshotsauce (Snapchat), colton.wise (tiktok), wisteriagrowshere (insta even tho all in the rp community hate miss swift you can’t blame a hustler for hustling 🤣 or maybe you can but idgaf), youtube (Colton wise) I’m also on SoundCloud and gonna be on Spotify and Apple Music within the next few days so check out my content and if you like what you hear please give me some love lol it’s so appreciated! I’ve had a terrible life, as most of us creative types have, so all the love and support I’ve been given means the world to me and I promise to never mention I know you guys from rp. I know how embarrassing that is 🤦🏻‍♂️😂 and I remember when we all lost our shit over that fucking podcast man lmfao 🤪 so yeah. I’m not a clown who is gonna expose y’all like that. Just make sure to tell me you’d like that information kept private and I promise I always will. Okay, I’ve rambled enough y’all go get to writing! Oh, and you bitches better make gifs of all my videos and use my photos as yalls icons cause who would’ve thought one of our own would really make it in this world but it’s possible guys. So I give y’all full permission to use me lmfao as a FC as long as y’all nasty freaks ain’t doing something super fucking weird and over the top kinky with it. Please don’t have me out here eating a pile of shit off a prostitution titties y’all fucking birdbrains or no underage shit and if I see one goddamn gif of me in a trashy ass glee rp I’ll lose it. I get it cause that’s how I started but damn they used to be wholesome and we aged those bitches up and we replaced all the deceased fcs out of fucking respect (rip corey and naya and amber cause girl i know you ain’t dead but I know stank face lea michele made you wish you were and y’all so wrong for still using her!!! And that pedo mark!!!!) 🍗🐔😂 so, shoutout to the rp community! I got you guys back for life man. For fucking life!! I promise y’all that 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️❤️👍🏻 until next time my motherfucking goatheads 🐐💕

cont. Oh, and I’m still out here rping y’all!!! I know I got so many threads and messages to go through but Hollywood came a calling for this James Dean wannabe 😂😎 and I just had to answer. So, yeah. To my former partners, I promise to reconnect and honestly? Now that I got the connections…let’s write for real together. It could still be like rp! We’ll just be coauthors together!! We all fucking deserve books man so write them with me or write them yourselves but let me promo the hell out that bitch baby! We are all so talented and beautiful and sexy af and we the mfing 🐐 bitches!! You can hmu on tumblr or discord for that type of thing! Business and promo on other socials cause ADD and OCD but I forgot my discord it’s been so long 🥲 so if you don’t got my discord yet just ask over tumblr!!

good luck w everything! ^__^

#answered

[szopenhauer]

Do you believe that an apple a day keeps the doctor away?  no, especially when you’re intolerant or allergic to apples 

Do you enjoy Jackie Chan movies?  used to be obsessed and watched plenty of those

Is there a fan going somewhere in your house?  we don’t own a fan

Do you listen to Duran Duran?  sometimes

Have you ever seen She’s The Man? it was cool

Do you like the color cyan? nah

Do you scan your own groceries at a self-checkout, or let the cashier do it for you at the supermarket?  let cashier do it

What do you suspect your lifespan will be?  short, I’m surprised I’m still alive

Are cats better than dogs? noooo

What year was it when your life began? 1992

When’s the last time that you ran? How far did you go? recently, just few meters

Do you enjoy Batman, Spiderman, Superman, or Iron Man most?  Iron Man and Batman but new Spiderman is fine too, I hate Superman tho

What is something that you think should be banned? I would have to make a list

what is something that you don’t like about the room you’re in? the fact not everything in here is mine but my mom’s and that I can’t lock it too and some stuff I would like to replace or even trash/give away if I had motivation and money for that 

on your last birthday, what did you do? skipped them

do you have any articles of clothing that have paint splatters? I don’t think so

does every shirt you own say something on it? not every but most of them lol

has hot wax ever been poured on you? possibly, I know I burned my fingers with matches several times tho

if you want to lose weight, how much do you want to lose? I wanna gain, I’m underweight even though I probably don’t look like it to many

have you noticed that radio stations repeat songs a lot? that’s how radio work and that’s why I don’t listen to it, I prefer yt and spotify instead

are shiny things distracting? might be

do you look people in the eye when you’re speaking to them? usually no but I often do when I listen to them

if you could get a tattoo right now, what would it be? maybe sun and moon on my knees 

do you know your blood type? nope 

could you be a teacher? ugh...

what personality traits turn you off? it’s complicated

do you say 'unreal’ or 'unbelievable’? I hardly ever use any of those 

if you could get a customized license plate, what would it say? BRF or smth else

how many flannel shirts do you own? not enough

do you like leggings? love, I wear them all the time

are you organized and/or responsible? wouldn’t say so

what’s the most annoying thing that someone has said to you? too many to name

when you were little, did you write on the walls? when I was allowed to I drew some things on the walls but I was already a young adult from what I remember

what do you do when little kids stare at you? smile or frown - depends

what would you do to get lips like angelina jolie’s? who said I want lips like heir’s?...

have you ever wished that it was possible to look at the sun for a long time? pointless

dr. phil or oprah? Oprah I guess in school, do/did you sit alone at lunch? yeah

how often do you wear pajamas out of the house? not as often as I’d like to lmfao

imagine you are in a bed sleeping with ronald mcdonald. would you expect to have little chicken mcnuggets as kids or little french fries?: ... what?

is there any music artists such as britney spears, michael jackson, and ozzy osbourne etc. that you think are good at music although they may not be a good person?: I agree some are bad ppl despite creating good content

do you have any of poems memorized?: I don’t, not even songs actually, I suck at it

have you read any of the twilight books by stephenie meyer?: hell no, didn’t watch the movies either and never will

do you ever write in pencil anymore?: only when there’s no pen around which basically never happens

what is your favorite song?: I have numerous favorite songs but lets say People are lonely by Gravitonas

what words do you not like?: plenty

have you ever been scared of your own backyard at nighttime?: looking through the window :x

what is the image on your mouse pad?: I don’t use a mouse pad

is there something that bothers you, that normally doesn’t bother people?: I suppose

do you think pomeranians are cute or ugly?: cute

if you’re going away for 2 days, do you pack a suitcase worth or a small bag worth of stuff to bring with you?: backpack

what are you sick of hearing about?: so many things actually 

have you graduated from high school?: ages ago

what’s worse: hitting a skunk with your car or having a dog shit in your favorite pair of shoes?: hitting a skunk - poor animal :(

if you were attending prom, would you prefer a big cinderella-ish dress or a skin showing mini dress?: mini dress probably or a suit haha

is there a video game that you really like the music from? if so, which?: hmm...

do you prefer crowds of people or being alone?: being alone

do you agree that smoking, doing drugs, and/or drinking makes you cool?: ewww, no way

what is the most embarrassing thing you’ve done in front of a significant other?: uh oh I don’t wanna even think about it omg 

which word do you consistently type incorrectly, even though you know the proper spelling?: dunno, nothing constantly but some words at times I might type incorrectly for fun

do you find that your friends are typically older or younger than you are?: typically younger or the same age 

how long was the longest time you’ve been single, not including before you began dating?: hard to tell

what is the oldest piece of furniture you have in your bedroom?: not sure

[sheminecrafts]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

from iraidajzsmmwtv http://bit.ly/2AcFp4w via IFTTT

#IFTTT #iraidajzsmmwtv

[technicalsolutions88]

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

from Mobile – TechCrunch https://tcrn.ch/2ELMwDV ORIGINAL CONTENT FROM: https://techcrunch.com/

#Technical Solutions #SEO #Online Earning #Youtube Marketing #Android Developer

[theinvinciblenoob]

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

via TechCrunch

#IFTTT #TechCrunch

[fmservers]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

Via Josh Constine https://techcrunch.com

#TechCrunch

[williamsjoan]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more published first on https://timloewe.tumblr.com/

[readersforum]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

New Post has been published on http://www.readersforum.tk/my-product-launch-wishlist-for-instagram-twitter-uber-and-more/

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

[taurian-fkbonline]

Surprise! Jay Z and Beyoncé​ ​casually​ ​announced their joint album during ​the London stop of their On the Run ​II tour on Saturday (6/16): “We​ ​want​ ​you​ ​guys​ ​to​ ​be​ ​the​ ​first​ ​to​ ​experience​ ​this​ ​new​ ​project.” ​

After debuting the​ir visual for​ “APESHIT​​”​ ​to​ ​the​ ​lucky c​​​​rowd,​ without warning, the pair​ released ​their ​collaborative album,​ EVERYTHING IS LOVE, to the rest of the world. All signs ​pointing to a joint album ​were ​there​.​ ​Ru​mors ​had been circulating about​ it​ since Beyoncé​ ​dropped her ​controversial ​visual album​, ​LEMONADE. ​​Following Jay’s repentant 4:44, working together was the obvious next move.​ Plus, if you’re a real Hov fan​,​ then you know when he goes without getting a haircut he is in album mode.

For ​the “APESHIT” visual, the couple did the unthinkable ​by ​renting out the world famous Louvre. Throughout the video dancers perform incredible routines as they come dangerously close to touching the priceless artworks. Hov and Bey pose in front of ​ancient Egyptian ​relics, the revered Greek statue of the goddess of victory​,​ Nike, and Leonardo da Vinci’s​ ​iconic​ ​work, making the statement ​that black love prov​es worthy ​of ​existing alongside the​se​ priceless ​pieces, and subsequently, everywhere.

T​his album​ finds the Carter’s renewing their vow​​s and ​providing closure to the trilogy. Unless you’ve been living under a rock​, you know​ Jay-Z cheated on Beyoncé​ ​and she aired him out on her ​​​​LEMONADE LP. Hov followed up​ by putting a prolific apology​ on wax with​ his very mature ​​4:44 LP, stripping away his ​womanizing pe​rsona​ and replacing it with that of a man who was ready to hold himself accountable​. Things are good now in the Carter household. “We​ ​were​ ​using​ ​our​ ​art​ ​almost​ ​like​ ​a​ ​therapy​ ​session,” Jay​ ​told The New York​ ​Times​,​ last year. “And​ ​we​ ​s​​tarted​ ​making​ ​music​ ​together.”

EVERYTHING IS LOVE—plus another standalone track called “SALUD!”—​is, in fact, The​ ​Carter’s​ ​therapy session. ​A true t​estament to forgiveness and reconciliation. The project feature’s contributions from Migos’ Quavo​ ​and​ ​Offset, Ty Dolla $ign—as​ ​wel​​l​ ​as​ ​impressive production from Pharrell, Cool & Dre, Illmind, Mike Dean​,​ Vinylz, Boi-1da​, ​and more. The album ​also​ serves as an ode to their children Blue, Sir and Rumi.

It kicks off with “SUMMER,” declaring that love conquers all,​ which​ ​sets a clear tone for the rest of the album. On “713” Jay recalls how their love story started, closing out the track by thanking all women for teaching men how to love. “Black​ ​queen,​ ​you​ ​rescued​ ​us, you​ ​rescued​ ​us,​ ​rescued​ ​us,​”​ ​he​ ​r​​aps​ ​affirmatively. While ​J​ay has​ absolutely​ caught his second wind​, delivering some of​ ​his best​ rapping ever​, Beyoncé​ ​​is an adequate match for her husband. On “HEARD ABOUT US” and “713” Queen Bey pays homage to rap greats Snoop Dogg and Notorious B.I.G.​ by putting her own twist on their iconic flows​. That is an excellent metaphor to where he is now in maturity, exchanging his braggadocios raps for more introspective bars. Jay ​makes it clear he doe​s​n’t forget anything​, ​​dishing some ear​-​​raising bars for his “little brother” Kanye West on “FRIENDS​.​” ​In his verse, Hov ​address​es​ comments ​Ye made in his two-hour Charlamagne tha God interview, where he expressed he was let down by The Carters not attending his 2014 wedding with Kim Kardashian. Jay raps, “I​ ​ain’t​ ​goin​​’​ ​to​ ​nobody​ ​nothin’ when​ ​me​ ​a​​nd​ ​my​ ​wife​ ​beefin’/I​ ​don’t​ ​care​ ​if​ ​t​​he​ ​house​ ​on​ ​fire,I’m​ ​dyin’, n—a, I​ ​ain’t​ ​leavin’/…If​ ​y’al​​l​ ​don’t​ ​understand​ ​that,​ ​we ain’t​ ​meant to be friends.” Jay also continues his subliminal war of words with Drake on “BOSS.” “N—-s​ ​getting​ ​jerked, that​ ​shi​​t​ ​hurts,​ ​I​ ​take​ ​it​ ​personally/N—-s​ ​r​ather​ ​work​ ​for the man than to work with me.” That bar was an obvious reference to Drake turning down a contract with Tidal to accept a $19 million contract with Apple. The Carters also have some words for their “Haters​.​” Hov takes aim at the NFL, admitting he turned down the offer to perform at last year’s ​Superbowl, declaring they needed him​ and​​ not the other way around. ​He goes on to ​let​ the GRAMMY committee know being shut out of last year’s ceremony didn’t phase him​,​ rapping​,​ “Tell​ ​t​​​​​​he​ ​Grammys fuck that 0 for eight shit.”On “NICE,” Beyoncé​ ​raps she could care less about streams​,​ and if she did, she’d of put ​​LEMONADE on rival streaming service Spotify. On the closing track “LOVEHAPPY,” the two deliver Sonny and Cher comedic relief, acknowledging ​the trials they’ve faced together. They playfully go​​ back and forth​,​ ending the album with​ the​ genuine sentiment that they’re in a good place: “We​ ​came,​ ​and​ ​we​ ​saw, and​ ​we conquered it all/We came, and we conquered, now we’re​ ​happy​ ​in​ ​love.”

EVERYTHING IS LOVE serves as a metaphoric victory lap for the couple—living out their very private lives through their music, taking the power away from the tabloids and gossip columns. Since their early collaborations they’ve always ​projected ​a narrative ​centered around ​how perfect their love for one another was. On their ​latest projects​​ they humanized themselves​ by revealing to​ us ​that ​they have the same problems we do—gracefully telling the world ​that ​everything that glitters ain’t gold, but you can polish it til​’​ it shines.

  Album Review: Jay-Z & Beyonce Prove Love Conquers All On EVERYTHING IS LOVE Surprise! Jay Z and Beyoncé​ ​casually​ ​announced their joint album during ​the London stop of their…

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