#rich singles dating

[sortagolddigger]

HOW TO GET AN ONLINE DONOR WITH NO TOUCHING

Girl.. turning a wealthy man into your friend will get you a bigger check then trying to be his “call girl” It’s all about making them feel important to the quality of your life. When a man thinks he saved you or gives you success he will always be happy to help you because it feeds his “God ego”

That's why billiionaires are constantly in the news for donating money to random people and causes because IT FEEDS THE EGO AND MAKES THEM FEEL LIKE GOD!

When a man slides into your DMs to say “hi” this is what you do. Ask him how his day was and if he's doing anything on the weekend. When he tells you what his plans are, reply with “oh nice, you're so lucky. I wish I could go out this weekend but I’m working”

This will make him see you have work ethic and take you a bit more seriously. He should reply with “I understand that work is hard blah blah” or something to show he empathizes with you.

When he shows he understands the struggle of working all the time that’s when you randomly bring up wanting more work to do. Say “my make up and nails are so expensive and I want to look good, so more work would be great” So after you say that, he should reply with calling you pretty etc. now you find a hot RED dress online and you DM it to him and make sure the price of the dress is over $100 but not more than like $200. Say “see it take a lot of work hours to look sexy”

So after that just abruptly end the convo because now he’s aroused but you want him to want more convo but you must act busy and stop replying. Then wait a couple of days no more than 5 and tell that man that there’s something you need help with. “Say your tire popped and now you can’t get to work”. He’s gonna ask you how much the tire is and he’s gonna pay for it. He already had fun with you a couple days ago talking about how hard you work and he knows if he doesn’t help he’s gonna lose the ability to be GOD in your life

So let him help you. Now you’ve established a man who will send you money and you didn’t have to give up your body to get it.

Same goes for any dating app btw! ❤️

PS DO NOT ATTEMPT THIS ON MIDDLE CLASS MEN. A MAN MUST MAKE 175k A YR.

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[mariatesstruther]

okay just hear me out modern au where tommy ends up picking up ellie from pre school almost everyday since joel is busy but he keeps meeting teacher maria

okay bestie as a preschool teacher you GOT me with this one. like you got me SO GOOD. this might actually get published to ao3, you got me soooo fuckin’ good right now. i have so many unnecessary details for such a simple plot so here’s a cut

tbh i feel like even as busy as joel is, he’d prioritize picking up and dropping of sarah as much as he can, so maybe he and tommy would alternate???? so on days when tommy drops off, joel picks up and when joel drops off, tommy picks up. sarah goes to a public preschool with a lot of kids, so she gets easily overwhelmed and sometimes needs extra cuddles or kind words in the mornings to make it out of the car.

one monday, a couple months into school, sarah is particularly VERY anxious because there’s a new teacher to replace ms. doherty, who quit unexpectedly on friday “because she said we gave her alooooottt of headaches, daddy.” now, sarah knows nothing about the new teacher except that shes a girl from a place called new york—and sarah doesn’t even know what new yawk IS like, thats So Far Away??? (“it’s not really that far, baby,” joel says to her. “and it’s new york. with an o sound.”) still, sarah is VERY concerned:

is new yawk like another planet???? (no, babygirl.) but what if she’s an alien???? (the school only hires human teachers, baby. they promised.) but what if she’s a SECRET alien??? (she won’t be, i promise.) okay but what if she’s mean???? (if she is, you tell me or tommy and we’ll talk to her about it, okay? she shouldn’t be mean to you.) what if she doesn’t play good music at quiet time???? (you can ask her nicely and i bet she will, baby. just say please and thank you, okay?)

still, even with her questions answered, sarah is very nervous on monday. both joel and tommy go with her in an effort to start her day off extra good, especially because joel can’t pick her up. they reassure her that new york has plenty of nice people and her new teacher will probably be one of them. she also gets TWO WHOLE extra minutes of cuddle time with BOTH of them before she and daddy have to leave the car—it’s half for her and half for them, because they’re honestly pretty anxious for her to like her new teacher too

joel is the one to hold sarah’s hand and walk her inside, because the school prefers only one guardian to drop off at a time. tommy’s nervous, but joel actually seems pretty pleased when he gets back to the car with no sarah in tow. surprisingly, he’s back faster than any time they’ve ever dropped sarah off before. with a proud smile, he tells tommy is that miss maria seems really nice. more importantly, she’s Black, which joel says Sarah got really excited about. tommy pries for more details, and he’s glad he does: apparently miss maria has locs, a few even blue and purple, and the first thing sarah’d said to her was an emphatic “😲😍🤩 i like your hair!!!!!!!!,” to which she had responded “thank you! i like your hair! what’s your name, sweets?” and that’d been that

later, when tommy does pickup that day, he doesn’t know what to expect. most times at the end of the day, sarah is super reserved and a bit cranky, eager to get home to finally have time to herself. tommy’s goal is usually to try and get her to at least wave goodbye to her teachers like joel asks—but, more often than not, she opts for reaching for uppies and hiding her face in his chest until they leave.

today??? no. it takes sarah a full two minutes to even notice tommy’s there because her and this drop-dead-fucking-gorgeous woman in a soft-looking lavender pants and blouse set are finishing up a painting at the easel wall. they’re working on what looks like a brown and purple butterfly, probably the most carefully shaped sarah’s ever made.

tommy’s heart stops when this goddess miss maria finally looks over at him and smiles with perfect pearly-whites, waving him over behind sarah’s back. when she says “sarah honey, i think someone’s here for you!” in her sing-songy toddler-tone, tommy swears an angel gets his wings. sarah turns around, shrieks with joy upon seeing him, and runs down to him with her arms out, yelling all the while: “THOMMYYYYYYY!!!!!”—because sarah’s still working on her hard ts—“thommy!!!! thommy thommy thommy come look!!! i made a butterfly for u!!!!! look!!!!! it matches ms. maria!!!!!! it’s gorgeous!!!!” (she’s been obsessed with calling things gorgeous ever since she heard tommy say it about a harley motorbike last week. joel especially thinks it’s cute, especially because of how she over-emphasizes the j-sound: gor-Jus.)

tommy’s never seen her so excited to show her art off at pickup-time before; usually, she waits until they’re home and she’s feeling less shy to start showing off, but she’s babbling and pointing to it as he picks her up and sets her on his hip: “it’s brown and purple like miss maria!!! isnt it so gorgeous, unca thommy??? do you like it???? aren’t they SO gorgeous????”

and now miss maria is looking at him. and he’s looking at her. tommy knows he’s blushing, and he hesitates—which sarah does NOT appreciate, so she says: “unca tommy!!!!!!! don’t be WUDE! thell miss maria she’s gorgeous!!! she is!!!”

luckily, miss maria saves him by explaining, in a slightly firmer teaching voice: “sarah sweets, that’s okay! we’re only just meeting, and that’s not really something you say to a stranger, okay?”

“but why noooooooot?? you are gorgeous! like my butterfly! isn’t she so gorgeous, thommy?”

“well, yeah, of course,” tommy agrees easily, because she obviously is—and shit. now miss maria is looking at him like he’s a fucking bonehead, because he obviously fucking is. “but—uh, i mean—she’s right, hon’. you gotta listen to your teacher, and that’s not somethin’ you say to a stranger, okay?”

but then, after thinking to her tiny self for a few seconds: “well if she stays my teacher then she’s not a stranger, is she???” sarah asks tommy, then turns her conniving little head towards maria, too. “and you said you’d stay! so can he say you’re gorgeous tomorrow?” then, without waiting for an answer, she’s back towards tommy to finish: “i think you should call her gorgeous tomorrow.”

“i think we should go home, s’what i think,” tommy says, finally deciding to save himself from four-year-old torment. he sets sarah down and pats her on the end with a gentle but firm request to go get her stuff from her cubby, which she goes to do without her complaints of being too tired to walk. maria watches them closely with a close-lipped but relaxed grin. when sarah’s out of earshot, he apologizes. “sorry ‘bout that, ma’am.”

“don’t be,” miss maria teases, crossing her arms. “you did call me gorgeous, after all. i’ve had worse introductions.”

“tommy miller,” he offers, moving to shake her hand. he notices her nails are done-up, a sparkly blend of pretty shades of purple that look tie-dyed on somehow. her hands aren’t soft, not really, but they’re smooth enough to make him shiver as he pulls away. “sarah’s uncle.”

“oh, i know,” she reassures, then nods her head pointedly towards sarah. the little one is coming back towards them with her lunchbox in one hand and her water bottle in the other, walking extra careful so she doesn’t trip over herself like she did last week, tommy guesses. clearly fond, maria continues. “she spent all day telling me about you and her daddy. you’re doing great with her.”

“unca thommy! i’m ready to go!” sarah sing-songs, interrupting whatever miss maria might’ve said next. internally, tommy thanks his niece—the you’re doing great was already enough to make him cry, and he’d rather not do so in front of either her or her amazing new teacher. plopping her lunch and bottle at tommy’s feet, sarah gives not one, but two eager waves to miss maria, hands flapping madly up towards the woman’s face. “bye miss mariaaaaa!!!! i’ll see you tomorrow!!!!”

“bye sarah sweets!” maria says back, waving just as enthusiastically. to tommy, she raises an amused, teasing eyebrow. just loud enough for him to hear as he turns away, he hears her say “bye, gorgeous,” and laugh, giving yet another angel a pair of wings.

it takes everything in him to not fall straight to the floor, toppling his own precious niece, right then. he doesn’t think he even breathes until both he and Sarah are secured in the car, him in the front and her in her carseat. she’s already babble singing mary j. blige’s “just fine,” which they usually play and sing on their way home from school to help her regulate. when he plays the song this time, sarah smiles bright at him through the rearview and says “i already feel just fine, unca tommy!!! but can we still play it, just for fun?”

“of course, baby,” he says, and start singing along with her. he’s feeling just fine, too.

🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

tagging some homies (btw just let me know if u wanna be tagged in this kinda stuff or not guys! im never sure lol): @becomethesun @clickergossip @boilingcowboy @bumblepony

#tbh i might edit this and put it on ao3 #im so sorry i didnt get ti the falling in love part at all but i LOVE a good meet-cute #*to #and this is i think my favorite one i’ve put on this blog??????? #anon. bestie. you did so well i love u thank u #if yall didnt know already im a preschool teacher so #and​ have i dreamed abt a rich hot younger single parent/gaurdian falling in love with me???? you fuckin betcha #preschool au #im 100% gonna try to connect this with the one rose and i already made #idk where ellie is in here but she’s here!!!! she loves miss maria too! #miss maria loves kids and especially loves embracing neurodiversity and all the different ways kids brains works #miss maria provides brain breaks and shows you how to do body checks to check in with your body #miss maria understands the importance of diversity in her book and media selection #miss maria recommends tab time and bluey #tommy x maria #tlou au #the tipsy bison #ugh I LOVE THISSSSSS BROOOO IM PROUD OF THIS 🫶🏾 #yeas i have plans for tess and joel YOU BET I DO #when ur kids having play dates turns into u dating their mom #tess and joel: who am i gonna date??? i have no time. im a parent #ellie and sarah: hold my juicebox #like theyre fully setting them up with no clue that they’re doing it I LOVE MY LITTLE GIRLS #she calls them sarah sweets and ellie enchanted #she’s referencing ella enchanted but elie doesnt care about that so she explains it means ellie is magic #and ellie is down for that because in her brain magic equal dragon. ellie LOVES dragons #sarah miller #toddler sarah #baby sarah #neurodivergent miller tag

[gumm1defloor]

Personally speaking if I had to pick one rairpair out of the entire hellaverse I would want to see canon it would be Velvette x Verosica but man it is going to be the most lavish, fluffy, intensely intimate, passionate, rancid & disastrous 24/7 trending full blown shitstorm hell has ever seen I don't think anyone is going to be ready. Not even these two. Dear god especially not these two.

Man Verosica is just 2 for 1 on short gremlin kings who are also coincidentally emotionally constipated walking talking sacks of untreated mental illnesses wrapped up in 3 layers of intimacy issues isn't she but hey at least this one's pretty much guaranteed never to steal your credit card for horse riding lessons and most definitely won't be caught one ring down in wrath in the middle of fuck knows where with said credit card so.... yay improvement?

#and unlike the last one - they don't talk about the last one - #She likes how effortlessly confident Velvette is with everything she works with and how little she has to worry about their relationship #when she's around her #ofc the gradual loss of autonomy and general sense of self is a whole other thing and she definitely doesn't need to think about it ever- #-cause her stunningly hot drop-dead gorgeous filthy rich and famous girlfriend just designed her 10 new fashion lines for her new tour- #-without her even asking- #-and they're gonna live stream the best date she's ever going to have in the fanciest restaurant the pride rings has to offer. #she's never felt this adored & safe & content in satin knows how long she is getting herself trashed every other saturday and STILL #manages to look flawless for every magazine by morning #& Velvette tells her they look so hot together every time they take a selfie as she pulls her waist & face & hair & neck into her side #like she's ready to swallow her whole #they spoil each other with gifts & praises and shit talking ppl behind their back #and absolutely nothing between them ever went wrong #hazbin hotel shitposts #helluva boss #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel velvette #I remember having a headcannon that Velvette sends every single girl/boyfriend(toy) she has ever had to Valentino after she dumps them. #sometimes she'll even throw in a personal recommendation #Velvette is dead quiet about the breakup this time around #Valentino - for once in his life- knows better to ask #Verosika never came to pentegram city to do live shows since #angst #I suppose #which is probably all my 2 neurons are good for past 9 pm

[fly-the-pattern]

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[egolitarianside]

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[borderline-of-hufflepuff]

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[becausewearebadmemories]

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[twistedtrannies]

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[dorasuga]

here for the good time and best time

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[sortagolddigger]

The way this man is so delusional I can’t even bare to give him the “go away you’re wasting my time” paragraph text. This man is rich like very wealthy and made it a point to let me know by doing the usual “sending a pic” that showed the background of his home etc. so ok cool but that’s always a red flag to me.

Showing me your home only works on desperate women not women like me. Once a man shows you his wealth and there is no mention of seeing how he can provide for you, understand he thinks you’re desperate. He’s waiting for you to send nudes or ask him for $40. DON’T DO IT!

Teach men like this a lesson. They need to understand the difference between desperate women who need $40 and women like me. I don’t send pics to men who haven’t given me money first. Maybe 1 fully clothed just to be nice but NEVER MORE THAN ONE! You can always tell when it’s a salt rich man. The effort to impress you should come easy with gestures of gifts and asking if you need something. Don’t be manipulated into being a penpal for a lonely man who is too stingy to buy you groceries.

This man will be blocked the next time he texts me with the assumption I’m gonna give him attention when he contributes nothing to my life

#dating #single #rich black girl

[pikkish]

So I know that 2022 isn't actually canonically when classic Doom takes place, it was printed in one of the port manuals without ever being confirmed by any of the original team, but I think it is infinitely funnier if that is when it takes place, because that would mean Hayden was alive through the events of classic Doom, and he still decided to everything he did. My man you saw the consequences and you still made the decisions you did. This is very much your own fault.

#doom #pikspeak #bc 2016 takes place in 2149 iirc and one of the codexes says sam is 'over 130 years old' #so at the very youngest he couldve been 3 in 2022 #but the codex says *over* 130 so he couldve been even older #of course i suppose it depends on your headcanon of when/how samur became samuel #was hayden a person before samur came along? did samur become an infant human child and grow up? #did he just craft a fake identity when he needed it and go 'yeah ok 2019 or earlier as a birth date sounds about right' #one of the codexes in 2016 establishes that he definitely has a history #born to a rich family; graduated from oxford; started a 'philanthropic orginization'.... #all things that can be verified. #so fully adult human samuel hayden didnt just pop into existence one day #there definitely *was* a hayden but where samur's influence comes in is up for debate #regardless i think its hilarious that hayden couldve been alive for classic doom #and he still went 'hmm yes i will open more portals to hell. this is a fantastic idea. nothing will go wrong. i am very smart. :)' #sam u idiot i want to punt you into the sun #unrelated sidenote anyone know why you cant italicise single words in textposts on moble #if u try it just italicises the entire post. dangit tumblr let me put emphasis on words.

[richsugarladies]

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[soocutelucifer]

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[richsinglewomendate]

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[triplecosmic]

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