I just want to live in big oversized sweaters and read while drinking hot coffee and look out at the rain from the comfort of my tiny cozy little home.
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Henry James 2. Vincent van Gogh 3. Rainer Maria Rilke
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L.M. Montgomery - Anne of Avonlea, Carole Maso - The Art Lover, Louise Gluck - Averno: "October," Leif Enger - Peace Like a River, Van Gogh - Avenue of Poplars in Autumn, Personal Photo, Mary Oliver - Song for Autumn, Dulce María Loynaz – Absolute Solitude: Selected Poems (tr. James O’Conner), A screenshot from Over the Garden Wall, Carol Bishop Hipps - "October," Angela Carter - Burning Your Boats: The Collected Short Stories, Personal Photo, Cy Twombly - Autumn, Rainer Maria Rilke - "Autumn," Alejandra Pizarnik - Extracting the Stone of Madness (Tr. Yvette Siegnert)
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I Am Too Alone in the World, and Not Alone Enough
by Rainer Maria Rilke
I am too alone in the world, and not alone enough
to make every minute holy.
I am too tiny in this world, and not tiny enough
just to lie before you like a thing,
shrewd and secretive.
I want my own will, and I want simply to be with my will,
as it goes toward action,
and in the silent, sometimes hardly moving times
when something is coming near,
I want to be with those who know secret things
or else alone.
I want to be a mirror for your whole body,
and I never want to be blind, or to be too old
to hold up your heavy and swaying picture.
I want to unfold.
I don’t want to stay folded anywhere,
because where I am folded, there I am a lie.
And I want my grasp of things
true before you. I want to describe myself
like a painting that I looked at
closely for a long time,
like a saying that I finally understood,
like the pitcher I use every day,
like the face of my mother,
like a ship
that took me safely
through the wildest storm of all.
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And in the nights the heavy earth falls
from all the stars into aloneness
Rainer Maria Rilke, from “Autumn” (”Herbst”), The Book of Images (trans. Edward Snow)
[”Und in den Nächten fällt die schwere Erde
aus allen Sternen in die Einsamkeit.”]
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The deepest experience of the creator is feminine, for it is experience of receiving and bearing.
- Rainer Maria Rilke
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What else is beautiful:
Your hands, at the end of a long day, carrying a cup of tea.
Aria Aber, ‘Schönheit/Beauty’, from ‘Hard Damage’
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when oscar wilde said 'i am tired of myself tonight, i should like to be someone else' and when sylvia plath said 'i wish i knew what to do with my life, what to do with my heart' and when rilke said 'this heavy humanness'
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rilke for the signs
Aries: “Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.”
Taurus: “Please don’t, above all, plant me in your heart. I grow too quick.”
Gemini: “So we are grasped by what we cannot grasp.”
Cancer: “Excess of being wells up in my heart.”
Leo: “Is there any taste of us in that eternity into which we merge?”
Virgo: “Love consists of this: two solitudes that meet, protect and greet each other. ”
Libra: “Rose, oh pure contradiction, joy of being No-one's sleep under so many lids.”
Scorpio: “It is nothing but a breath, the void.”
Sagittarius: “The inner — what is it? If not the intensified sky, hurled through with birds and deep with the winds of homecoming.”
Capricorn: “For among these winters there is one so endlessly winter
that only by wintering through it will your heart survive.”
Aquarius: “I want to be with those who know secret things or else alone.”
Pisces: “Make your ego porous. Will is of little importance, complaining is nothing, fame is nothing. Openness, patience, receptivity, solitude is everything.”
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Lo que se necesita es sólo esto: soledad, gran soledad interior. Ir dentro y no encontrarse con nadie más durante horas, eso es lo que uno debe aprender a lograr. Ser solitario como uno era de niño.
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And if happiness visits you again, do not remember it's previous betrayal. Enter into the happiness and burst.
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When did I become I and the body? When did the two of us separate? ~ Adit Nagrath
1. Warsan Shire | 2. Maïté Grandjouan | 3. Porochista Khakpour | 4. Maïté Grandjouan | 5. Rainer Maria Rilke | 6. Holly Warburton | 7. Ocean Vuong | 8. Hollis Brown Thornton | 9. Ocean Vuong | 10. Laurie Halse Anderson | 11. Hollis Brown Thornton | 12. Richard Siken
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Rainer Maria Rilke im Schwarzwald, Rippoldsau
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Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
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so the rilke reference.
“Our deepest fears are like dragons guarding our deepest treasures.”
what’s odd is that as far as i can tell, it’s not a real rilke quote
which means one of two things- either someone fucked up (always possible! but here? unlikely)
or it's on purpose, and is one of those things ted lasso writers like to throw in just to deepen the text (much more likely) (i would bet a lot of money that jason has read letters to a young poet many times) (bill wrubel wrote this ep and i am CERTAIN he has read it)
so the fact that keeley REFERENCES the book in her joke, leads me to assume it's the latter- that it’s on purpose and it’s meant to make the joke funnier and more interesting as a character reference-
so- in universe- it's rebecca’s anonymous suitor is googling things to sound smarter- or has heard the quote misattributed before from someone else- and it works! she’s impressed, [because she thinks she should be! although if she’s getting two picture dicks then even a wrong rilke quote is pretty gasp worthy] and doesn’t look any deeper. it’s of no consequence whether it's true or not, just that it has the desired effect.
and in our world- it’s this year’s ‘be curious not judgemental’ which if you didn’t know is a misattributed walt whitman quote.
the essential point here is about quotes like that- if they serve their purpose to inspire or impress, does it really matter who said the words? walt whitman never said that, but ted has built a whole life philosophy out of it that really works for him.
[so it being a misquote! and sounding like something like ted would say! means rebecca’s bantr match is either ted or could be someone who spends a lot of time with ted, and listens to ted’s quotes! or is a rando and literally nobody but me was ever gonna make this connection...]
but the real reason i wanted to put this in long form is that i actually think that rilke’s 8th letter [honestly the whole book is amazing, highly recommend] and specifically the real part of it that is where the dragons misquote comes from has immense resonance for season 2 as a whole:
“How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.”
sounds a little like ‘do the right thing even if you lose’ to me.
rilke’s 8th letter is about sadness, about grief- but it’s more about being solitary- allowing yourself the solitariness that sadness requires to do it’s work. allowing yourself to change through not just the positive things that happen to you, but ALL the things that happen to you. to literally ‘be curious and not judgemental’ of YOURSELF. (seriously go read it, it’s incredible- i had forgotten how much life lives in that man’s words)
loneliness and solitude is a key theme between ted and rebecca- it’s something that their arcs share.
i mean this part is... literally ted:
“So you mustn't be frightened... if a sadness rises in front of you, larger than any you have ever seen; if an anxiety, like light and cloud-shadows, moves over your hands and over everything you do. You must realize that something is happening to you, that life has not forgotten you, that it holds you in its hand and will not let you fall.”
and this feels like where we’re headed, towards a healthier version of ted, of rebecca- once they have dealt with their griefs and had their solitude.
“But only someone who is ready for everything, who doesn't exclude any experience, even the most incomprehensible, will live the relationship with another person as something alive and will himself sound the depths of his own being.”
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Believe me that death is a friend, our most profound friend, maybe the only one who is never, never deterred by our actions and indecision...and this, you understand, not in the sentimental-romantic sense of a denial of life, of the opposite of life, but our friend especially then when we most passionately, most tremblingly affirm our being-here, all that happens, nature, love...Life says always at the same time: Yes and No. Death (I implore you to believe it!) is the actual yes-sayer. He says only: Yes. Before eternity.
Rainer Maria Rilke, “On Loss”, Letters on Life, 112
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Ah, how good it is to be among people who are reading.
Rainer Maria Rilke
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The moments when something new has entered us, something unknown; our feelings grow mute in shy embarrassment, everything in us withdraws, a silence arises, and the new experience, which no one knows, stands in the midst of it all and says nothing.
- Rainer Maria Rilke
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