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#romantic academia

Starting a new thing (if it isn’t already)

Distracted academia aesthetic

  • Get good grades but can’t read a chapter of a book without mindlessly scrolling through dark academic lit posts or pictures of other books in between pages
  • Likes the IDEA of studying, cannot for the life of them make it through a chapter of that textbook without thinking about moving to England after getting into Cambridge or Oxford
  • Makes it through the classics in the pursuit of knowledge but took multiple years because of the allure of the ya fiction fantasy section at Barnes and noble
  • Writes handwritten letters for loved ones with little pressed flowers in them, but has the absolute messiest handwriting
  • Style fluctuates from dark academia style to only sweats for a week to whatever was on the floor when they woke up that day
  • Has read the classics a couple times and follows the text post fandom accounts, but couldn’t hold an in-person conversation about them because reasons
  • Loves to read but literally hasn’t picked up or finished a book in ages just because of the sheer number of things they are currently procrastinating at the moment
  • Either has 30 million things in there mind or has about -2, there is no in between
  • Is trying their best and deserves a hug :)
  • Distracted academia
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I have no way to contact the person with whom I am locked in a battle over Quizlet match superiority. But I just know we have an enemies to lovers storyline coming if I could only find them. Or at least rivals to best friends.  Simply put, I want to match with my Match opponent.

Back to the beginning of the story:

On November 30th I got an email from Quizlet reporting that Broadwayangel8 had bumped me down on Match for the study set “AP Literature Perrine’s Terms.” Now, I took AP Lit as a sophomore in high school and now I’m a sophomore; it’s been four years. I don’t know the person who made the set or how I got to it either. The person who made the set didn’t even use Match on it as myself and Broadwayangel8 were the only two people who had ever played Match on that set, four years apart. All of Broadwayangel8′s public study sets are from 7 years ago, so we really do seem to be meeting at an odd convergence of times. 

I did the only logical thing I could do after receiving such a notification; I went to beat their score. And I did. It felt kind of good to be back there again, like returning nostalgically to the basics after gaining more experience. It also felt good to win not going to lie.

Over the next few days Broadwayangel8 and I became locked in a battle for supremacy over the Match game on this Quizlet set. I am currently a fraction of a second in the lead and waiting for their response. If they decide to respond that is. Maybe I’m just lonely now that my semester is over, but I really hope they do. I feel genuinely connected to this person. Even if they don’t respond and I never meet them, I love that sort of connection with strangers. There we all are interacting with each other, gaining little pinprick insights into the lives of others, passing them by and noticing something personal but without context.

So Broadwayangel8, if you’re out there, hello! Can we be friends? Can we be actual fully formed human beings for each other instead of this little point of light, this little piece of information? I see from your previous sets that we have somewhat similar interests. Would you like to practice French with me, if you kept it up past 2013? Or we could just play match together. That would be fine too. I’ve made some pretty lit (literature) Quizlet sets since then which we could face off on if you have the time.  

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i’m so over that stupid “love is dead, nothing matters” phase of my life

like bro there is love in everything!! i love biology because my crush is there!! i love writing because i can make my own villains!! i love waking up because i get to see my dog!!

being negative is easy but falling in love with your reality is beautiful

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As palavras foram meu primeiro amor.

Mesmo quando bem mais nova, quando ainda não entendia que aqueles símbolos formavam palavras, frases e por fim estórias, eu me apaixonei.

Eu passava meus pequenos dedos sobre as páginas dos livros, querendo magicamente entender o que aquelas folhas queriam me falar, quais segredos estavam ao alcance dos meus olhos, e um dia finalmente aprendi a decifrá-las.

Percebi como as palavras escritas são infinitamente mais convenientes para meu entendimento e desabafo do que as palavras ditas.

E quando, por um momento, me afastei delas, descobri meu inferno. Me senti incompleta, quebrada, não conseguia mais me reconhecer e olhei no espelho me perguntando quem era aquela me observando com olhos tão vazios. E eu tive tanto medo ao perceber que era eu.

Mas as palavras voltaram a me encontrar, me levaram de novo para casa e minha alma não precisou mais gritar para o silêncio. As palavras me deram abrigo, me ajudaram a cuidar dos meus demônios e entender meus medos, transcrevendo as aflições escondidas nas partes mais ínfimas da minha mente e coração.

Jane Austen em Orgulho e Preconceito disse: “Mas confesso que a mim nada disso me encanta. Prefiro infinitamente um livro”.

As palavras me mostraram um amor que poucas pessoas conseguiram me despertar, me mostraram outros mundos além do existente em mim.

Me ensinaram a ser menos egoísta e também me fizeram entender que tudo bem ser egoísta às vezes.

(Palavras Escritas, 2019)

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