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#sabrieileena
antiqua-lugar · 3 years
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more spn headcanon shitpost as i go on with the rewatch: jack is now ten and has to make a family tree. this is not the one he actually turns in  - gabriel is “uncle uncle” because he’s with sam AND he’s the only archangel who is truly castiel’s brother. also he thinks it’s hilarious
- let’s be honest chuck only cared about the archangels to everyone else he was just the bio father. so he’s jack’s grandpa but he’s not anyone’s dad unless you are an archangel.
- john is dean and sam’s dad but also he was demoted to john in the end so i assume jack does think of him as john not as “grandpa”. no one corrects him.
- charlie and benny honorary aunt and uncles. rufus and missouri are honorary aunts and uncles OR honorary grandpa and grandma if that works in american culture i have no clue
- crowley qualifies for being jack’s grandpa but he does not want to be a grandpa. except when he does. also he got him a hellhound and sneaks him candy.
- if we are bringing everyone back to life i want uriel back to be the distant cold uncle that they will “explain when he’s older”. raphael also tried to kill everyone and start an apocalypse but he had reasons.
- adam is not shown related to dean and sam bc they forgot him in hell for five seasons that says a lot. he and michael are the “they moved to another continent before you were born and only visit sporadically” uncles. 
- right now i like the idea of balthazar and benny together mostly because i think balthazar would hit on people in dean’s life because it’s hilarious and then it’s like oh. oh no. (he also hits on mary but i think mary is chasing the malewife of her dreams. or the soft lesbian of her dreams. idk which way mary swings but she wants to settle down) (i do like the idea of mary and linda tho).
- jack’s “emergency contact” list goes on for two pages. it’s not like he needs it when he can just pray to angels but dean actually likes seeing all the people he can count on in his life being written down.
- yes. they have family group chats. castiel put them all on mute.
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