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#sad quote

“You once told me that the human eye is god’s loneliest creation. How so much of the world passes through the pupil and still it holds nothing. The eye, alone in its socket, doesn’t even know there’s another one, just like it, an inch away, just as hungry, as empty.”

-Ocean Vuong

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I’m surrounded by distractions. I haven’t found a way to block all the sounds that pound away in my head. I sit there whilst they circulate around my mind. As a result, I procrastinate until I hate myself for being unable to create something that I love.
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Music helps fill a void that is empty and avoid the issues my mind won’t let me. Everyday these songs allow me to sleep peacefully as each lyric resonates with me. I want to drift away as I forget about tomorrow. In this moment, the music eases all my worries. In this moment, everything is okay.
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I don’t feel like myself anymore. I want to restore everything that made me, me. I want to look in a mirror and adore who I am instead of not wanting to exist anymore. Where’s my humour gone? Where’s my motivation? I don’t enjoy waking up questioning what I exist for.
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I feel broken. I can’t open myself up to those I’ve known a long time. The last time I spoke about the thing that lurks beneath my skin I almost ripped my skin off me.
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I won’t let the illusion you have of me break — I won’t let you see how calloused my soul is, how the light slowly seeps out of me leaving an empty shell. I’ll be what you need because I need you.

- M.

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