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#saints bless you people
cats-in-the-clouds · 10 months
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idk if this has any merit to it so correct me if i’ve got the wrong idea but a thing i’ve been thinking lately is that the biblical dichotomy between jew and gentile (which new testament scripture teaches is no more) is sort of reborn in the modern dichotomy between like.,,, cradle catholic and random atheist/agnostic
point being, God will reach out to everyone. even those who aren’t doing all the little traditional rituals right, even those who don’t know what they’re doing, even those who just walked in out of nowhere. so the former need to remember to have humility and compassion for others who are trying their best to seek truth.
this is not to say the former are doing anything wrong by going through all those motions- of course not! and of course those motions aren’t insignificant; they’ve got so much history and tradition behind them. but ultimately they aren’t what save us. the foreign gentile who just showed up one day is baptized and saved. the deathbed convert is baptized and saved. funny how that is
the devout jewish people of the scriptures and the modern day hardcore tradcaths are neither better nor worse than other people- they are the people fortunate enough to be born in the ‘right’ environment, so encountering Christ and being saved will be much easier for them. but this also means they have a responsibility to do more.
and if they go haywire in the way they behave the consequences will be so much worse because of what they’re supposed to be representing (and i’m sure we all know that biblically the jewish people have caused lots of their own problems and presently. well. a lot of catholics Suck™️. we are all that person sometimes. often. usually)
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thesearchforbluejello · 10 months
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Reading tags on ao3 is like playing Russian roulette except instead of a bullet to the head sometimes you just end up with irreparable psychic damage.
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badolmen · 5 months
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Incredibly frustrated by how condescendingly jaded my uncle can be but I’m being so brave about it <- not blowing him up with my mind even though I want to
#ra speaks#personal#I love him. but my dude. bruh.#made a comment abt how I should try working/volunteering w the homeless#after I commented on his tirade abt homeless ppl ‘gaming the system’ by getting arrested in the winter#to have somewhere warm w food to stay like ‘why are we not talking about how fucked it is that the homeless will fucking die if they don’t?#like sir. buddy. you do remember that I grew up on food stamp right? I have gone to a food bank as a recipient before.#I’ve volunteered at shelters and soup kitchens before. I know addicts and homeless people in town.#this isn’t some naive wide eyed college socialist ‘those poor homeless people are saints’ schitck#this is a tired university food pantry anarchist ‘aren’t you fucking tired of being cruel to people who make the best o thr circumstances?’#sorry you can no longer see the divine value of every human life and must endure the tragedy#of considering everyone not to your standard a lost cause.#some of us see the work to be done and will be doing it instead of wallowing in hate and pity.#shut up and get to work like the rest of us if you hate it so much.#it’s just like *strangled him* you see me twice a year dude I DO WORK AT A SOUP KITCHEN YOU IDIOT#I just don’t talk abt it because it’s just something I do sorry I thought making acts of charity your whole personality#was vain and frowned upon in christian society???#this makes my plans to ditch academia and go into fulltime aid work feel all the more. idk vindicated???#that’s not the right word but you get it. uncle t I love you but you know fuck all and have hardened your heart to the world.#god break that heart of stone you have and bless you with love for your fellow man. or whatever.#for context this convo happened like two years ago but I saw him last week and in light of recent personal revelations I’ve remembered it#core memory locked in ‘are you for fucking real uncle t?’#vocational woes
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if we can get gerard way to convert back to catholicism before they die, then they could be considered for canonization as a catholic saint. c'mon i know of AT LEAST two miracles, we could do this
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hippiehawaii · 7 months
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to those who follow me…
penis <3
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Nothing like spending all semester on a project that is literally the grand amalgamation of your bachelor’s degree and only like five people coming by your poster to talk about it on the school-wide presentation day (two of which are your teachers for the class and one of which is your mom who mainly came to say hi)
So like
If anyone wants to know more about Biocultural Restoration in the Hawaiian Islands... 
Slide into my DMs or asks
I have so much to say on it
For those just minimally curious, here’s the poster 
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Also yes that QR code works lol Leads to a nice case study
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ereborne · 2 years
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I just escaped a two-hour meeting in which I mostly spent my time very gently-but-firmly explaining to a coworker that I cannot provide her with her requested report early, because it requires information that doesn’t exist yet.  She wants to start work on her contract submissions ahead of time because she has vacation lined up, and I admire her initiative, but her contract types are dependent upon class enrollment numbers, and uh, the students aren’t actually done signing up yet.  And won’t be until mid-August.  Which is why her reports go to her in mid-August.  Bless her heart, I must’ve gone over it a dozen times, and she still--all the way through the end of the meeting, this woman still even now does not understand.  This is a woman who would search the yard forever for the ball you didn’t let go of. 
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bbqhooligan · 3 months
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why would quora do this to me
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tovaicas · 1 year
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I think the time mismatch between you and your bros in ShB is such a good idea for character drama
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hellisharchive · 2 months
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・﹒・ hypersexual nights
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Summary: How various Hazbin and Helluva Boss characters react to a hypersexual reader!
Warnings: 18+, sexual scenarios, Vouyer!Vox, does hypersexual not tell you enough lol just read it
Parings: [Seperate] Saint Peter, Lucifer, Valentino, Adam, Vox, Mammon, and Striker x hypersexual!reader
Notes: HOLY SHIT THIS WAS GONNA BE FOR 300 FOLLOWERS NOW ITS 400 FOLLOWERS! As a celebration, have this! I'm an hypersexual aroace myself so hypersexuals rise up! 💪
﹒Adam﹒
・He would notice how you always were down to fuck, almost every day in fact, how could he not? You've been the only one to truly keep up with him as most other people always had "low" sex drives and wouldn't be in the mood when he was. So you were like a blessing just for him when day after day, you would always be up for sex at any given moment. When you told him you were Hypersexual one day after a good fuck, he just laughed in your face.
・"Hypersexual? You're always horny? Bitch PLEASE I already knew that. You ask for sex like- every day and never shut up about it. That's why I like you so much. You want to be fucked just as much as I want to fuck"
﹒Saint Peter﹒
・He is a pretty innocent soul, he swears occasionally but when it comes to sex? Oh boy. And you? Being hypersexual? You always flirt with him in a suggestive manner, wanting him to just admit that he likes you. He can't help but simultaneously love the attention as the thoughts you always put in his head, but feel so embarrassed and dirty about it. He always seems to short circuit whenever you flirt with him, but he never says no, so you keep doing it. He of course noticed it after the first few times, you being on par with Adam in sexuality, how could he not? But when you admitted that you were hypersexual and he finally understood.
・"Oh? That's why you uh- why you're always flirt with me! Haha...and say those...really uhm...dirty things... Not that I mind of course! I actually uh...kind of like it..."
﹒Lucifer﹒
・He had his suspicions very early on, it was so obvious to notice how you and Angel Dust got along so well with the topic of sex. He also noticed how you always made sex jokes and talked about sex even without the porn star around. And when it came to him? You always seemed to get flustered whenever he flirted with you, always ensuring to make it dirty, and it worked everytime. After you got together, you almost pounced on him, wanting to have sex early on. He didn't mind it, but in fact, wanted it. You then apologized and said you were hypersexual, meaning you couldn't not think about sex constantly. He just laughed and pinned you down on the bed.
・"Oh I know very well, very well. And I will enjoy fulfilling every. Single. Desire. You could ever ask for"
﹒Mammon﹒
・He isn't exactly the smartest tool in the shed, but he knew you were just as greedy as him. Not in the money sense, no, no. But in sex. You haven't yet gotten to that point in your relationship yet, but he could tell you were denying taking the step. Was it because he was a Sin? He didn't know. All he knew is that if you didn't fuck him already, he was going to fuck you first. So he confronted you and you said you were scared of him just using you for sex due to your constant sexual nature. He reassured you that he truly did love you, but couldn't deny that someone just as greedy as him was very nice to have around.
・"Oi! Don't be scared mate! I won't use ya just for sex and toss ya away! I love ya too much for that. But ya know- I'd be down to fuck every single night if that's what you want"
﹒Vox﹒
・He is an interesting case. He isn't the best guy around and loves to spy on you. So, when you act all innocent and sweet around him, yet fuck yourself silly with a stupid toy screaming for him so incredibly often it becomes a pattern? Yeah, you're hiding your sexual nature. Which is odd, but probably so Valentino didn't swoop in to take advantage of you. Instead of talking to you, he let your feelings build and build and let your toy eventually not be enough for you. You finally burst into his office and told him you knew he was watching you while you masturbated. He was taken aback at first, but then laughed as he realized you loved that he watched you.
・"You need the real thing, huh? Was waiting for you to finally say it you dirty little whore"
﹒Valentino﹒
・He noticed immediately as you would constantly flirt with him in a suggestive way and he would flirt back just as hard if not harder. It was so easy to notice, he played into it very hard and took advantage of your very sexual nature. It was easy to get you hooked quickly and you never had to say a thing. He fucked you in every way he could imagine and you loved every second of it. It was a mutual understanding between you two- the thought of telling him that you're hypersexual was laughable in every sense of the idea.
・"Oh baby~ you wanna be fucked into the mattress again? It hasn't even been three hours amore~ you're still horny? I'll make sure you can't walk anymore after~"
﹒Striker﹒
He isn't apposed to sex, he just hates it when people makes jokes about it when he's just trying to do his job. In fact, he loves sex, have you seen the huge statue where his dick is very endowed? That man is full of himself and knows he can fuck good. You started out as a target for him and at first your sexual flirting threw him off his game. But after many failed attempts of cat and mouse, you finally managed to get him to admit that he liked it from your non stop remarks.
・"Ok fine- yer hot and I wanna fuck. Don't look at me like that! Not my fuckin' fault yer always telling me you wanna suck my cock"
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lxclerc · 5 months
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𝐨𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐨𝐭 — 𝐚𝐚𝟐𝟑
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summary… the leclerc twins have a reputation of messing with drivers and they’ve got their eyes set on poor alex albon request… yes. pls let me sleep laura faceclaim… char argyrou pairing… alex albon x leclerc!reader
note… because laura graduated and got her driver’s license, i caved @coffeehurricanes
note again… this was surprisingly really fun to write as someone with my own annoying twin brother so it ended up longer than i meant it to which means this will have a part 2
part 1 | part 2
masterlist
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yn_leclerc
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liked by lorenzotl and others
yn_leclerc serving cunt (as always) (with my 3 fav minions)
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username yn casually and unknowingly dropping alex thirst traps
⤷ username she knows she’s feeding the alex girlies
charles_leclerc charles erasure
⤷ yn_leclerc you know youre my most fav (you have the most money)
⤷ charles_leclerc gee thanks
alex_albon i thought you’d put slime on my hair
⤷ yn_leclerc i told you i wouldn’t. i was trying to style your hair 🙄🙄🙄
⤷ alex_albon i have 0 trust in you
⤷ username alex is waiting for that mega prank like the rest of us are
⤷ username i’m fully convinced they’d make alex cry worse than lando
⤷ landonorris it was one time and they ruined my limited edition louis vuitton
⤷ yn_leclerc *accidentally*
⤷ charles_leclerc that i paid for
arthur_leclerc hanging out without me now
⤷ yn_leclerc you were too busy crying abt having no seat for next season 🤗
⤷ username one thing about yn is that she’ll always give her brothers the painful unfiltered truth
username ok but not enough people are talking abt shirtless alex
⤷ username no bc picture me this; shirtless alex, they’re alone and she’s fixing his hair
⤷ username …that does sound oddly intimate
⤷ username yall are tripping. she and arthur did the same thing to oscar and max remember, became super close with them then pranked them when they least expected it
⤷ username yes but also it’s been literal months with alex
⤷ username that just means that the prank will be spectacular
arthur_leclerc
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liked by alex_albon and others
arthur_leclerc we are in badly need of your prayers for my twin sister, y/n 😓😞🙏
she’s fine. she’s just so insanely down bad for a man that she can’t say it to his face and needs me to follow them around so she can hang out with him bc she can’t look him in the eye.
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leclerc_pascale ay, arthur! J'ai eu peur pour ta sœur ! (you had me scared for your sister!)
⤷ arthur_leclerc Tu devrais avoir peur, maman ! Elle pleure cet homme tous les soirs et il ne sait même pas qu'elle l'aime. (you should be scared, mom! she cries over this man every night and he doesn’t even know she likes him)
⤷ yn_leclerc Taisez-vous ! !! fermez votre bouche ! arrêtez de parler ! (shut up!!! keep your mouth shut! stop talking!)
yn_leclerc you’re dead to me 🙂
yn_leclerc 🖕🖕🖕
yn_leclerc j'aurais dû te manger dans le ventre de ta mère (i should have eaten you in the womb)
yn_leclerc you no longer have a sister
⤷ arthur_leclerc Comment faire autrement pour flirter avec **** ? (how else will you flirt with ****?)
⤷ yn_leclerc TAISEZ-VOUS !!! (SHUT UP!!!)
charles_leclerc a man, huh?
⤷ lorenzotl 🤔🤔🤔🤔
⤷ yn_leclerc no ❤️
⤷ username she gives no fucks 😭
username what are brothers for if not to publicly humiliate you?
username she’s so me coded actually
alex_albon prayers 🙏
⤷ arthur_leclerc thanks, mate. we appreciate it
alexandrasaintmleux and if i speak
⤷ yn_leclerc alexandra malena saint mleux don’t you dare
⤷ charles_leclerc you know too???
⤷ alexandrasaintmleux 🤐🤐🤐
username she’s like me bless
username for a M*N??
alex_albon
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liked by yn_leclerc and others
alex_albon was just trying to buy midnight snacks and then we got lost
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yn_leclerc we didn’t get lost bc i had a map 😁
⤷ alex_albon that you didn’t know how to use
⤷ yn_leclerc you weren’t exactly offering your map reading knowledge either, albono
⤷ alex_albon watching you struggle was adorable
⤷ username HE CALLED HER ADORABLE
⤷ username idc what anyone says, i am an ynalex truther
arthur_leclerc i was there too, guys
⤷ yn_leclerc you complained the entire time
⤷ arthur_leclerc because you woke me up to accompany you guys
charles_leclerc why is there a puddle on the floor?
⤷ yn_leclerc alex dropped one of the ten liters big water bottle
⤷ alex_albon lies. y/n dropped it and i had to say i did because she looked like she’s about to start crying.
⤷ charles_leclerc yeah, that sounds like my sister
username alex, don’t trust them or else they’ll make you cry like they did lando
⤷ username we’re looking out for you 😭
georgerussell63 mate, don’t be getting comfortable with those two
⤷ yn_leclerc slander
⤷ arthur_leclerc fake
⤷ georgerussell63 you put a rat in my cereal
⤷ arthur_leclerc *plastic* rat
⤷ georgerussell63 i dropped and cracked my phone
⤷ yn_leclerc sounds like you were being clumsy 💁‍♀️
username george is forever traumatised by that rat
username hear me out 👀
yn_leclerc
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liked by alex_albon and others
yn_leclerc thirst trapping bc posting on my close friend that only has him in it isn’t enough apparently
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username she is so me!!!
username doesn’t matter how famous or pretty you are, you’ll always have an instagram close friends with only him in it
logansargeant i saw your close friends story on ****’s phone a few days ago 🤔🤔
⤷ yn_leclerc why were you looking over his phone you muppet?
⤷ logansargeant i just happened to glance by
⤷ username it’s alex. i’m fucking telling you all. ITS ALEX
⤷ username there’s literally no way it’s not alex
⤷ username it could be oscar
⤷ username bitch since when was o s c a r four letters?
⤷ username jack is four letters. they could be trying to throw us off
⤷ username JUST ACCEPT THAT ITS ALEX
charles_leclerc put a shirt on
⤷ yn_leclerc no ❤️
⤷ charles_leclerc 😡😡😡
⤷ username she’s always so unserious when it comes to charles lmao
arthur_leclerc abt to bleach my eyes brb
⤷ lorenzotl pass it over after
⤷ charles_leclerc pass it here too
⤷ yn_leclerc i could build a castle out of all the bricks they throw at me 💁‍♀️
username those leclerc genes are leclercing
username girl get the hell up 😭😭
charles_leclerc added to his story!
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yn_leclerc
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liked by alex_albon and others
yn_leclerc in the 1500s off in a foreign land, i was forced to marry another man (he can’t take the hint that i’ve been in love with him for years now)
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username whoever he is, please just ask her out already 😭
username girl, i’ve said this before but for the love of god get the hell up!!! you are better than this!
⤷ yn_leclerc i fear i’m not, bff 😔
⤷ username man down 😓
logansargeant i’m telling you rn that he’s as in love with you!
⤷ yn_leclerc did he tell you that 🤨
⤷ logansargeant no but he wouldn’t have put up with for this long if he doesn’t
⤷ yn_leclerc he’s put up with you for an entire year
⤷ logansargeant yes but he’s paid to put up with me
⤷ username this is all the confirmation that i need. it’s alex
username take the goddamn hint already @alex_albon
charles_leclerc WHO IS IT
⤷ lorenzotl it’s pretty obvious, isn’t it?
⤷ charles_leclerc okay but whoooooo
⤷ username charles is worse than alex 😭
arthur_leclerc this is getting pathetic. @alex_albon it’s you mate. she likes you, you like her. kiss it out 🙄
⤷ yn_leclerc ARTHURRRRRRRRR
⤷ username arthur 😭😭😭😭😭😭
⤷ charles_leclerc WHAT?
username arthur starting chaos bc hes so tired of listening to y/n mope 😭
username arthur revealing y/n’s crush and publicly embarrassing her (again), charles being shocked not having a single clue and lorenzo not caring as much is peak brother behaviors in ways i cannot explain
username i fucking told yall its alex
landonorris mate dont leave a lady waiting @alex_albon
⤷ oscarpiastri yeahhh
⤷ yn_leclerc both of you shut the hell up before i replace your shampoo with nair
⤷ landonorris how would you even have access to my shampoo-
⤷ oscarpiastri don’t ask mate. she’s done it before to dennis in f3
username paging @alex_albon
username @alex_albon dont fucking fumble a bad bitch like her come on now
alex_albon oh?
⤷ yn_leclerc public announcement that y/n y/m/n leclerc has died in a ditch and cannot be contacted at this hour. or ever.
⤷ alex_albon i know where you live
⤷ yn_leclerc locking the doors and putting salt around the property as we speak
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happy birthday and congratulations to my most loved laura. i love and adore you and i can’t wait to watch you be the woman that you’re always been capable of.
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midnightwriter21 · 1 month
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jjk hcs: the jjk boys as boyfriends
characters: yuji itadori, megumi fushiguro, yuta okkotsu
warnings: none (i think?)
AN: if there’s anymore boyfriend hcs that you’d like to see lmk!! read gojo & nanami as boyfriends HERE
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YUJI ITADORI
oh girl i am JEALOUS
he can be a little air headed at times but he’s the sweetest bf ever
i say he’s air headed but he’s actually very attentive
you get half an inch trimmed off your hair?
he notices immediately
“babe your hair looks great!”
notices everything about you actually
from your favorite color
to the brand of PENS you prefer to use
who tf notices the brand of pens people use?!?
yuji does
yk the tiktoks of boys picking entire BUSHES of flowers for their girlfriends
that’s him.
he straight up rips a whole bush out of the ground from the front of jujutsu high to give to you
principal yaga was not amused
gojo was tho
HE PRINTS OUT YOUR INSTAGRAM PICTURES TO REPLACE THE POSTERS OF MODELS ON HIS WALL
he’s so proud that your his girl fr
oh and he’s gotta hella pet names for you too
they’re all super basic
babe, sweetheart, cutie, etc.
he flirts w u like y’all aren’t together
awful pickup lines and everything
“do you have a mirror in ur pants? cause i can see myself in them.”
if u don’t think he’s the cutest then u can go argue with the wall bye
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MEGUMI FUSHIGURO
he has me in a chokehold
anyways
at the beginning of y’all’s relationship he’s awkward as fuck
but he eases up pretty quickly
veryyyyyy private with y’all’s relationship
if you somehow get him to hold your hand in public let alone give you a kiss?!?
girl count ur blessings fr
and it’s not bc he’s embarrassed of your relationship or anything no ma’am
it’s bc he would NEVER hear the end of it from gojo, nobara, and yuji
valid excuse
but when you two are alone?
oh girl it’s like he’s glued to you
when i say clingy? i mean it
also
king of nap time!!
he’s kidnapping u, bring you to his dorm room, dropping u on the bed, and laying completely on top of you
swear it’s his solution to everything
ur tired? it’s nap time
sad abt something? it’s nap time
a curse beat ur ass? it’s nap time
gojo is being annoying? it’s nap time
nap time cures everything ong
he’s not too crazy w the pet names
in private he’ll call you babe
in public you’re lucky if he adds a -chan to ur name lol
he’s so pretty boy
also can we appreciate his gorgeous luscious eyelashes?
no? okay
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YUTA OKKOTSU
i would give my first born to make him feel happy, safe, and loved
KING OF MY HEART
he’s so baby
he’s the type of bf that no matter how long y’all have been dating he still gets flustered over you
y’all been together for an hour? he’s blushing when you give him a kiss on the cheek
y’all been together for a week? he’s blushing when you give him a kiss on the cheek
y’all been together for a year? he’s BLUSHING WHEN YOU GIVE HIM A KISS ON THE CHEEK
HE. IS. BLUSHING.
which is so incredibly endearing and innocent
but don’t get me wrong
mess with this man too much?
oh he’ll snap
he has the patience of a saint. but when it runs out?
oh ur in for it miss gurl
period.
teasing him a lil too much tryna make him flustered
when he finally snaps he is switching that dynamic up real quick
now he’s the one smirking and feeling all smug while you’re the one with the bright red face
ahem…
anyways
yuta’s love for you is very intense
now don’t start thinking HE is intense cause no
i mean yuta loves you so much that he might just crawl up inside ur body and live there
that type of intense
you occupy his mind 99.9% of the time
he’s on a mission and has time to stroll through the mall
“oh y/n would like that” aND HE’S BUYING IT
he’s chit chatting with inumaki and panda
best believe he finds a way to bring you up in conversation
“oh! that reminds me y/n said something the other day about…”
he is the softest ever when it comes to pet names
sweetheart, my love, princess, etc.
i’m so soft for him he deserve the world
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Danny has became a patron saint of the homeless community in Gotham.
He didn’t mean to, he just really like certain people he has met during his time in the streets.
Little did he know that meant he has been accidentally blessing a lot of nice homeless people.
The people notice.
They whisper of a blue eyed black haired boy. He is as thin as a dead leaf but stronger than a bridge and seen across the entire city.
He doesn’t carry much on him yet always seemed to be able to pull out needed necessities.
He’s sweet in a way that few people are in the shadows they lived in and cared for the people who were kind back.
His tattered closes dance in an invisible wind and never complains of the cold.
Be kind to the boy, and the world will be kind to you.
He cares for his people and doesn’t care for those who mistreat them.
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writing-with-sophia · 5 months
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Old money names
For girls:
Adelaide - Meaning "noble and kind".
Beatrice - Meaning "bringer of happiness".
Cecilia - Meaning "blind" (associated with the patron saint of music).
Dorothea - Meaning "gift of God".
Eugenia - Meaning "well-born" or "noble".
Florence - Meaning "prosperous" or "flowering".
Georgiana - Meaning "farmer" or "earth worker".
Henrietta - Meaning "ruler of the home".
Isabella - Meaning "pledged to God" or "devoted to God".
Josephine - Meaning "God will add" or "God increases".
Lavinia - Meaning "purity" or "woman of Rome".
Matilda - Meaning "mighty in battle".
Octavia - Meaning "eighth" or "born eighth".
Prudence - Meaning "cautious" or "wise".
Rosalind - Meaning "pretty rose".
Seraphina - Meaning "ardent" or "burning one" (associated with the highest order of angels).
Theodora - Meaning "gift of God".
Victoria - Meaning "victory" or "conqueror".
Winifred - Meaning "blessed peace" or "joy and peace".
Penelope - Meaning "weaver".
For boys:
Archibald - Meaning "genuine and bold".
Bartholomew - Meaning "ploughman".
Cedric - Meaning "bounty" or "generous".
Desmond - Meaning "one from Desmond" or "gracious defender"
Edmund - Meaning "fortunate protector".
Franklin - Meaning "free landowner" .
Gregory - Meaning "watchful" or "vigilant".
Harrison - Meaning "son of Harry".
Ignatius - Meaning "fiery" or "ardent".
Jasper - Meaning "treasurer" or "bringer of treasure".
Leopold - Meaning "brave people" or "bold for the people".
Montague - Meaning "pointed hill" or "sharp peak".
Nathaniel - Meaning "gift of God" or "God has given".
Orville - Meaning "golden city" or "gold town".
Percival - Meaning "pierce the valley" or "piercing one".
Reginald - Meaning "counsel power" or "ruler's advisor".
Sebastian - Meaning "venerable" or "revered".
Theodore - Meaning "gift of God" or "God-given".
Victor - Meaning "victor" or "conqueror".
Winston - Meaning "joyful stone" or "joyful town".
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doriangraysbitch111 · 2 years
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everytime i remember my man sufjan stevens has created and released his own audio louvre i crumble a little
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Please let Astarion meet Tav's family and have a younger sibling like 6 be like im gonna marry the prince points at Astarion.
Tav : Sorry, im married to the prince
NO IM GONNA MARRY THE PRINCE
That's so fucking cute kill me. But I just realized AFTER I finished it I read this wrong 😭😭 I read it as "marry" instead of "married" so whoops now it's an asking for your hand in marriage fic.
Also, I'm going to make this a weird little, unofficial, alternate reality, off shoot of this fic to explain away why Astarion can be in the sun without ascending because I am ~lazy~
Quick summary if you didn't read it, Tav serves Selune, gets a blessing for all the good work, and uses it to cure the anti-light issue of the vampirism (but not all of it). It's not a literal extension of that fic but I'm stealing my own plot explanations. That's it! Now here we go:
~
Astarion wasn't nervous per se. He was just... on edge. And the two-week journey it took to get here wasn't helping things, not when it gave him so much time to ruminate in his thoughts. He never expected to be in the position of "meeting the family," let alone in anticipation for asking for someone's hand in marriage.
Astarion wasn't even quite sure how his life got here. He had always fantasized that a life without Cazador would be one of selfish hedonism, not one where he would be legitimately concerned about a damn six year old sibling's first impression of him.
But then you came along, effortlessly shattering all of his grandiose plans with a batt of your eyelashes. Perhaps the entire journey of falling in love was more complicated, but it felt like it was that simple. In hindsight, he never stood a chance against you, but it was hilarious that there was a time he ever thought he did.
All of his prior dreams and fantasies felt like nothing in comparison to just being with you. It had been a year since you both saved the Sword Coast, a beautiful, fantastic year. That had ended with him somehow more in love with you now than when he first confessed. Selune's blessing had certainly helped with that he was sure. He still couldn't quite believe that you would use a god's blessing on him of all people, but gods, was he appreciative. Because being able to walk in the sun again meant that he could live the life he wanted, with no restrictions. He could be the partner you deserved, the kind that a father would happily say yes to when asking for your hand.
Which brought him back to his current dilemma. Perhaps he hadn't seen any of your family members in the time you'd been together, but he had heard plenty. You loved them all to death, especially your little sister. You wrote to them constantly, the mere sight of a letter from your parents enough to put you in a great mood for the rest of the day. He was aware that your mother was supposedly a saint, a fact that your own father had instilled in you often. He knew that they had a wonderful, loving marriage and were both higher ups in the Church of Selune. A fact that Astarion didn't particularly enjoy.
As grateful to the moon goddess as he was, he was aware that you were an expectation to the very normal belief that vampires were bad. And that marrying one was one of the stupidest things you could ever do from an average person's perspective, let alone a Selunite.
Why you hadn't done the smart thing and lied about what he was, Astarion would never know. But he did know that the thought of their rejection over his admittedly sordid history was putting him in a tailspin.
"They're going to love you," You said for the hundredth time, giving his hand a squeeze as you led him up the steps to your childhood home, "You have nothing to worry about sweetheart. I promise."
Astarion highly doubted that, but you were already knocking on the front door before he had a chance to argue. The door instantly slammed open, a beaming child already launching themselves at you before Astarion could process what was happening.
But you were more prepared them he was. You effortlessly caught them in your arms, laughing at their excited shouting, "Titi! You're late!"
So this was the famous Arabeth.
"No, I'm not!" You laughed as you settled her on your hip, "And what happened to my little girl's manners huh? You haven't even introduced yourself yet."
The child glanced over at him, like she was just realizing for the first time that someone else was standing over there. She looked a little shocked at the sight of him, staring at him with wide eyes. Wide enough for Astarion to start to wonder if something was on his face.
He gave her a little wave only for her to bury her face into your shoulder, peeking out at him with her lips pursed. Which was not the best start to the whole making his darling's family actually like him plan.
"Well, as you've probably guessed this is Arabeth. She's just a little shy," You reassured as you stepped inside, muttering a quick invitation inside under your breath. He appreciated that, he didn't need the whole house to be reminded of his... limitations.
"But she'll get over it soon enough," You continued as you called into the house, "Mom? Dad? We're here!"
And just like that they were rushing into the room, acting just as excited as your sister had been. Your mother wasted no time in smothering your face with kisses while your father swept you up into a hug. It was a rather impressive display of coordination, considering how they hadn't managed to knock you and your sister to the floor in the process. Astarion was pretty sure they were both saying something along the lines of We missed you! But it was hard to tell with all of you so tangled up in each other.
It was heartwarming to see, in all honestly. Of course such a loving person would come from an equally loving family, what else would he expect?
Though he certainly hadn't been expecting for your mother to throw her arms around him next. She brought him into a tight hug before looking him up and down, "So you're Astarion huh?"
She turned back to you, grinning ear to ear with her hands set on Astarion's shoulders, "He's so handsome! Selune help us, do you remember the last boy you brought home? He had a nose the length of my arm-"
"And that's enough of that," You said with a strained laugh, pulling your eccentric mother back a few inches, "And we've talked about the impromptu hugs. What happened to asking for permission?"
"Sorry, sorry!" She said with a wave of her hand, "Let me try again. I'm Seliras, and this is my husband-"
"Marcoul," Your father interrupted, putting his hand out for Astarion to shake, "It's been awhile since we've met a boyfriend."
"He's a little more than that," You said with a sigh as everyone exchanged pleasantries.
"We'll be the judge of that," Marcoul said with a sharp but friendly grin, the grip he had on Astarion's hand briefly tightening before he let go, "From what we've heard, you're quite the character aren't you?"
Ah, so the interrogating was starting early then. It was nothing that Astarion hadn't expected. Besides, turning up the charm was his strong suit, even when he was uncharacteristically nervous.
Astarion smiled back at him, "You've heard right. And I'm more than happy to answer any questions you might have."
"Oh gods please don't say that," You groaned, but it was too late. Your parents were already leading him to sit, rapid-fire questions coming out of their mouth.
Where are you from? How did you meet? Are you serious about our Tav? What's your religion? Where's your family? What are your plans?
But Astarion answered them all, with only mild censorship for the child's sake. The child who suddenly couldn't stop staring at him. It wasn't exactly easy to sell himself as a future husband when he was a vampiric ex-slave, but he made do.
It was an overwhelming experience to say the least, but not necessarily an unpleasant one. That was one good thing about trying to marry into a family of zealots, it was a lot easier to convince them of your virtue when you received a personal blessing from their goddess.
By the end of the night, they were all throughly appeased, enough so to get off the topic of him for a moment.
"You look a little young to have a thirty-year old child," Astarion said to your mother. He was actively trying to compliment her for obvious reasons, but he was also genuinely curious. She barely looked a day over 40.
"Oh we breed young," She said with a laugh, "We had Tav in our teenage years. Arabeth came much, much later. Our favorite little surprise. Gods, I can't think of a single person in our family who didn't have kids young. Our little Tav is the only exception to the rule."
"But maybe not for much longer, huh?" Marcoul added with a grin, yelping when you lightly smacked him over the head for the comment.
"Do not start the kid talk again!" You hissed out, cheeks red, "We've talked about this!"
Astarion couldn't help but grin at your reaction, charmed by your embarrassment. Though... the idea of the two of you having children together sure was an interesting thought.
Astarion felt a tug on his sleeve while you were distracted arguing with your parents. He turned, smiling when he saw your little sister standing there, still staring at him with wide-eyes.
She took a deep breath before blurting out, "You look like a prince. Are you?"
"Not exactly," Astarion said with a small laugh. That couldn't be further from the truth, "There's no blue blood in my veins."
She frowned, cocking her head at him like he wasn't making any sense. But then an idea obviously struck her as she excitedly asked, "But if you married a princess, then you'd become a prince too. Right?"
"I suppose?" Astarion answered with a shrug.
"So if I become a princess, and I marry you, then you'll be a prince?"
This conversation was quickly becoming out of his depth. But luckily enough for him you were swooping in to save him.
You laughed at her question, turning your attention back to the two of them, "No offense Bethy, but I'm going to be the one marrying this particular prince."
But Arabeth wasn't having it. She crossed her arms, looking at you like she was the one talking to a child, "You can't. Because if I don't marry him, he won't be a prince. So there. I have to do it."
She looked so serious, her facial expressions incredibly similar to your own. Astarion was holding back a loud laugh as you tried and failed to reason with her, "I can marry him without the royal status-"
"No! I'm marrying the prince!"
Your parents were doing a much worse job at hiding their reactions, both of them opening giggling behind their hands as you came up with a compromise.
"Okay, okay," You said with a sigh, kneeling down to look the small girl in the eye, "How about this? I marry him first. But only until you become a princess. Then he's all yours. Sound fair?"
She thought about it for a moment before nodding to herself, "Sounds fair."
Well Astarion wasn't going to get a better set-up then that. He turned to your father, his nerves coming back for a brief appearance, "I'm assuming now might be a good time to ask what I came here to ask. Though I do promise I only intending on asking for one of your children's hand in marriage."
Marcoul nodded slowly, his face unreadable as he spoke, "I mean no offense when I say this Astarion, but you aren't exactly who I imagined for my daughter."
"Dad don't-"
"Darling, let him finish," Astarion gently interrupted, his eyes still locked with your father's.
He took a deep breathe before continuing, "That said, I've never seen her so... herself with someone else before. So yes. The two of you can marry. On one condition."
"Anything," Astarion said instantly, nearly giddy at the fact that he was so close to the official yes, "Just name it."
"You have to have the wedding here," Seliras answered for him, a massive smile on her face, "No ifs, ands, or buts."
"And I get to be flower girl!" Arabeth chimed in, her past indignation completely forgotten as she climbed all over you, "And there has to be chocolate cake!"
"Oh gods, help us," You groaned, but Astarion was already nodding along. He couldn't give less than two shits where it happened or who was involved. He could scarcely believe that it was happening at all. But that was the last thing he had needed.
He already had the ring, the most amazing person he could ever fathom being with. Who actually wanted him back.
Now all he had to do was ask.
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