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absolutly-not-an-alien · 2 months

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Tombstones

From top to bottom

Santo aka Weevil, Fnv

Geiger, Fnv

Elaine, Fo4

I love being the fandom for my friends and I’s ocs

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introspectingjeva · 3 months

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Hilda Furacão walked so Fleabag could run

(fr falling in love with a priest is so girlboss of them)

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weirdlookindog · 8 months

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Santo y Blue Demon contra los Monstruos (1970)

AKA Santo and Blue Demon vs. the Monsters

#santo y blue demon contra los monstruos #santo and blue demon vs. the monsters #santo #blue demon #1970 #1970s movies #gilberto martínez solares #lucha libre #luchador movies #my caps

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wgm-beautiful-world · 6 months

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IGREJA DE SANTO ILDEFONSO - PORTO, PORTUGAL

#igreja #church #iglesia #santo #saint #ildefonso #baroque #barroco #porto #portugal #europe #europa

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guyincognitojr · 3 months

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#santo

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leandrobson · 17 days

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gameraboy2 · 1 year

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Santo in The Revenge of the Vampire Women (1970)

#santo #the revenge of the vampire women #1970 #1970s #vintage #film #movie

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garbage-connoisseur · 9 months

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Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter

Let's talk about a very silly movie starring Kung Fu Jesus Christ trying to stop a group of vampires from committing hate-crimes. That's right baby, it's Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter!

Things are grim in Ottowa, Canada. A string of vampiric murders have targeted the local lesbian population and severely impacted church memberships to boot. The church decides to pull out their secret weapon...

This alone should be enough to sell you on the movie, but let me just throw in that besides vampires and Jesus it also contains (bad) kung fu and musical elements.

I should however also do my usual content warning for the movie: While it doesn't contain any major sexual assault, homophobic or racist scenes, it does still come from the tradition of Troma pictures, so there is a recurring gag with a female character getting groped, a villainous character french-kissing a corpse, some general distasteful bits and just... So much blasphemy (obviously).

But back to the story:

Jesus gets several make-overs throughout the story, first of which includes a haircut, a couple of earrings and a song-and dance routine in which he proves his might by healing the sick in front of a public crowd.

There's sadly not a lot of diagetic singing and dancing, but the soundtrack does slap, and the movie more than makes up for it with memorable scenes, such as when Jesus has just been out shopping for wood for stakes, but gets accosted by a new enemy:

After which we are treated to a scene of some 30+ atheist combatants leaving a single (clown?) car, followed by a very dumb fight scene.

Jesus finds out that the reason that vampires can travel freely in the sunlight is that a mad scientist has been grafting the skin of the dead lesbians they've been kidnapping unto them, thereby protecting them from the deadly rays of the sun. For any vampires reading this, there's a thought, eh? Although maybe steer clear of the hate crimes.

However, Jesus on his own is no match for the entire vampire population and he gets completely trounced, at which point the movie treats us to a wonderful little take on the parable of the good Samaritan:

That's right, first a bishop walks past Jesus without helping him, then a cop (ACAB) and finally he gets help from a transvestite (according to the credits), who nurses him back to health. Support your trans communities as they would support you. <3

And that is generally the message of the movie. I don't want to spoil anything else. The movie is very worth watching, it's genuinely funny while also being very supportive of queer people. It's currently less than €3 on German Amazon, so go grab yourself a copy and experience this wonderful low-budget masterpiece for yourself.

I'll just leave you with this:

#cult film #vampire movies #horror movies #horror comedy #religious satire #jesus christ vampire hunter #kung fu #horror musical #santo #blasphemy

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schlock-luster-video · 29 days

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On March 25, 1995, Santo VS the Vampire Women was riffed on Mystery Science Theater 3000.

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absolutly-not-an-alien · 1 month

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Based on the fact that, in some cases, ghouls have been known to be in control of their radiation output

Like feral glowing ones doing that blast thingy or Jason Bright not giving you RADS

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blessedpapi · 3 months

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#blessed #saint #holy #santo

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weirdlookindog · 9 months

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Santo vs. Frankenstein's Daughter (Santo vs. la hija de Frankenstein, 1972)

#santo vs. la hija de frankenstein #santo vs. frankenstein's daughter #santo #1972 #1970s movies #miguel m. delgado #horror #lucha libre #luchador movies

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doubtfultaste · 7 months

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Atacan Las Brujas (1968)

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cookies-cream-sin-azucar · 4 months

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Por los poderes de San Cipriano y de las tres almas que vigila, (nombre de la persona) vendrá ahora detrás de mí (su nombre), va a venir arrastrándose y enamorado, lleno de amor verdadero con todo su ser, lleno de deseo por volver y pedirme perdón.

San Cipriano glorioso, bendito santo cumplidor, tendré ese poder de que esta persona olvide y deje de una vez cualquier amor que pueda estar en su cabeza o en su corazón y vuelva a asumirme y declararse para que todos vean.

San Cipriano aleja a (nombre de la persona) de cualquier otra persona, que me busque en todo momento hoy, ahora y siempre, deseando estar a mi lado, que tenga la certeza de que yo (su nombre) soy el ser perfecto para su vida, que no pueda vivir sin mí, que no pueda estar sin mí, que no pueda sentir amor si no es por mí, y que siempre tenga mi imagen en su pensamiento, en todas las situaciones, en cualquier tiempo y lugar.

Ahora, donde esté y con quien esté, (nombre de la persona) me buscará, porque su pensamiento está en mí, sus palabras, sus gestos y sus acciones van dirigidos a mí (su nombre). Y al acostarse, que sueñe conmigo, me sentirá, y al despertar que piense en mí y me desee, al comer piense en mí, al pisar piense en mí, en todos los momentos de su vida piense en mí.

Que quiera verme, sentir mi olor, oír mi voz, tocarme con amor, que (nombre de la persona) quiera abrazarme, besarme, cuidarme, protégeme, mimarme, amarme las 24 horas de todos sus días y todas sus noches, haciendo que así me ame más y sienta placer tan solo por oír mi voz.

San Cipriano poderoso, te ruego, haz a (nombre de la persona), sentir por mí (di tu nombre) un deseo fuera de lo normal, un amor verdadero, cálido, respetuoso y profundo como nunca sintió por otra persona y nunca sentirá. Que halle placer solo conmigo y nadie más, que sienta deseo solamente por mí, y que su cuerpo solo a mí me pertenezca, que solo tenga paz si está bien conmigo.

Con todo mi corazón, con todo mi ser, te digo santo poderoso que mi total confianza está puesta en Dios y en ti, te agradezco San Cipriano por estar trabajando a mi favor y voy a divulgar tu nombre y tus milagros en pago de amansar a (nombre de la persona) y traerlo enamorado, cariñoso, devotado, dedicado, fiel y lleno de deseo a mis brazos, para no marchar jamás.

Así se cumpla, así lo espero, así será cuanto antes, así lo harás bendito San Cipriano, mi seguridad está en ti, sé que tú me vas a conceder mis más ardientes deseos. Ganaré esta batalla y seré nuevamente feliz junto a (nombre de la persona), ya nada nos detendrá y nuestro amor por siempre triunfará. Así se cumpla, así lo deseo, así lo harás, así lo espero, con la completa esperanza que tú, Cipriano bendito, me vas a sacar de este problema de amor. Gracias mi Santo Cipriano, te agradezco sinceramente.

#amor #oración #santo

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penultimatestroke · 1 month

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Hilda👠 and my Saint 📿

🥀🌪🥀🌪🥀🌪🥀

Hilda Furacao

#hilda #hilda furacao #saint #santo #malthus #frei malthus #hilda muller #brazil #brazilian #portuguese #globo tv #tv globo #globoplay #tv series #miniseries

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leandrobson · 29 days

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