Alright so this is less romantic and more shitposty but. If I can request the scarecrows' responses to a gotham university psychology student showing up at his doorstep like "hey uh could you look at my thesis?" Like fully prepared to be fear toxin-ed on the spot but absolutely worth the risk cause lord knows that's some shit I'd do 💀
A/N: hnnggg this shouldn't have taken as long as it did but I kept taking it too seriously except for the absolute crack that it is lmao I have no doubt in reality it'd be a miracle if any of them opened the damn door.
Scarecrows Reacting To A Student Looking for Feedback (crack)
Arkhamverse Scarecrow:
First of all, how did you find him?
Secondly, how dare you disturb him?
Are you fearless or just foolishly stupid?
He genuinely can’t tell and he doesn’t want to waste time thinking about it.
However, since you’re here now…
And it doesn’t look like you’re going anywhere anytime soon.
Clearly, despite how many threats he’s shot your way.
He isn’t opposed to a willing test subject
Nolanverse/Murphy Scarecrow:
Well, this was odd.
If not also incredibly annoying.
When he hears your reason for being on his front stoop.
He is shocked…
Surely your institution has much more qualified, not to mention more relevant assistance to look over your paper.
He’s a man of science making headways, he has no time to–
Well, actually…he hasn’t seen very sufficient results in his recent Arkham patients…
BTAS Scarecrow:
Really? Him?
Even when he was a professor, none of his students came to him for a review.
No doubt he’s itching to just shut the door on you.
Then again, perhaps he can hold you ransom for some money to fund his toxin…
And on top of that he can also use you for testing the effects of his recent toxin…
How he could make it stronger, faster, last longer…
Besides, he’s never gotten a chance to properly review a term paper..
This should be fun.
TNBA Scarecrow:
He’s likely to ignore it, if not open it, yell at you and then slam the door.
This Scarecrow doesn’t have time for this nonsense.
Surely, you have other institutional superiors that you can go to?
Why would you willingly dive headfirst into danger?
Unless…you just don’t care?
If you’re so willing to get into danger, perhaps he should take advantage of it.
He debates with himself for a minute…
Before finally just gassing you with his toxin.
Taking sweet delight in your screams.
Fear State Scarecrow:
You should consider yourself lucky that he even answered the door.
Like seriously, the only reason he answered was because of your incessant knocking.
He had half a mind to slip on his mask and inject you with toxin and be done with it.
He’s far too busy planning his Fear State Theory into motion.
Jonathan can’t have any distractions or loose ends…
Everyone has their role to play, he was so sure that Gotham would enter it’s Fear State seamlessly.
Patience running low, he does open the door, and one threat is all you get.
When you don’t leave, it’s very much your fault that you’re screaming bloody murder down the street.
Year One Scarecrow:
Jonathan groans at the prospect.
His past sure has a strange way of following him somehow.
Again, you should be surprised he even answers the door.
But you kept pushing your paper underneath his front door.
Quite, infuriating him.
It takes a few more threats and slams of the door before he finally reaches his breaking point.
He slaps on his mask, believing he’s done all he could to be rid of you.
Perhaps, a reminder will help you.
He’s no professor, a scholar on fear.
He’s The Scarecrow, the Master of Fear…and you’ve just experienced his wrath as you breathe in the toxic fumes.
Masters of Fear Scarecrow:
Jonathan is confused, if not also agitated.
Is this some kind of joke?
His lived a long pathetic life of humiliation…
He doesn’t need it coming to him, knocking at his front door.
You can’t just expect anyone with a PhD is willing to help you…
What kind of simpleton just walks up to a known high-class criminal, a criminally insane criminal?
Honestly, when spoken like that, it was quite admirable.
Took a lot of courage…bravery…or just a huge lack of common sense.
Yes, yes, he’ll take a look, but first…indulge him in your fears
(it’ll help him in his own research later)
HQ:TAS Scarecrow:
Jonathan thinks this must be some kind of joke.
Surely, this is the Legion pulling his leg, what else could it be?
Not only that, how else would you found out where he lived?
It has to be a joke.
He tries to play along, but is quick to realize you’re actually being serious.
Probably the only one that’s actually going to help you with your thesis paper.
1000/10 would recommend
And you may even get a member of the Legion of Doom as a friend.
HHSD Scarecrow:
I’m surprised Grandpa could hear you knocking.
Just kidding, only a little, I love to love and rag on this version when I can.
But you really shouldn’t have picked a night when there were Elvira re-runs.
Jonathan opens the door, reluctantly and is perplexed, but immediately annoyed.
He didn’t have time for these things when he WAS a professor.
He thought he left this type of harassment years ago, why do you choose to haunt him now with it?
When you fail to leave on your own accord. He advises you to go away through a speaker by his door.
When you still refuse, he decides enough is enough.
Jonathan was inspired by that intriguing night at Crystal Cove, as he used a maniacal jack-al-lantern of his own to run you off.
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❝ given your family's status among the upper echelon of Gotham's ... business world, ❞ his pause unpunctuated by uhs or ums but, rather, an unassuming twitch of lips, curiously pout (tense, even; perhaps), ❝ it's a wonder your uncle is still a patient, here at Arkham. then again ... I'm sure even a family like yours harbors plenty of its own fears. ❞ - from dr. Crane (because since i already hit you with mr. Jokes i figure i may as well throw in a crow for kicksss :x) (oh and if he's seems slightly unsettled by (adult?)Wednesday it's because he is.)
insanity reigns behind her eyes, devoid of life and meaning. she’s staring straightforward, already knowing her whereabouts and where each corner led. it wasn’t the first time she walked those halls and it certainly wouldn’t be her last. she’s keeping an eye on the doctor through her peripheral vision though — she couldn’t trust him. no doctor who keeps the insane locked should be trusted. the addamses policy states that all madman should be allowed to roam as they wish ; that is the only way to achieve the level of chaos in the world they oh so crave.
rims of her pout twitch upwards, the sight eerie at the very least. head slanted to the side, obsidians now piercing doctor… a quick glimpse at his name tag, then back to staring him dead in his eyes, ❝ you’re wrong about something, ❞ she begins, wiping the smug upon her countenance to show the seriousness of her words, ❝ we aren’t keeping my uncle fester here as some sort of punishment or because we can’t evade the law. ❞ why on earth or below would they want to evade the law when they are the ones helping with writing it? eyes dart forward once more, staring into the void and nothing more. ❝ he wants to stay here. and who are we to deprive a man of what his heart desires? ❞ there’s a flicker of pure madness that glistens within her eyes, one she doesn’t let doctor crane see. it’s only a matter of time until she’ll join the club. it’s a family thing.
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This is the backed-up document of Bible passages submitted to a Utah school district for removal on the basis of pornographic content. via /r/atheism
This is the backed-up document of Bible passages submitted to a Utah school district for removal on the basis of pornographic content.
As reported here and elsewhere, The Salt Lake Tribune uncovered the document submitted to a Utah school board containing the pornographic passages from the Bible.
The Tribune article links to a Google doc which has been removed, but it also embeds a pdf file. The pdf seems to be cached as embedded in the article, but if you try to access the Scribd document, it's been taken down.
In case it disappears altogether, I'm backing it up here. We've all seen lists like this before, but I thought it notable to preserve this particular one considering the current news story.
Note: despite the text being under 40,000 characters, reddit won't let me post, so I'll include the text in the first comment.
Submitted March 24, 2023 at 07:18PM by scarecroe
(From Reddit https://ift.tt/UIVBtpG)
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