things i’ve heard english majors say pt. 8
-I mean as a writer there’s no greater joy than emotionally tormenting others, so
-I don’t really think of myself as having a personality
-my poetry slam ass said I dare you to teach me about stanza breaks
-Wait we’re reading Chaucer next week? *whispers violently* fuck
-You know it doesn’t reflect super well on me when I say that you can read my chapter 14 without having read any of the other chapters, but
-i’m revoking your explosion scene privileges
-ITS A PILOT G-2 BLACK INK 07 BALLPOINT PEN OR IM NOT FUCKING WRITING
-oh we’re prefacing now?
-you’re really nailing the girlboss moment right now
-if fucking John Updike can win two Pulitzer’s, I can get a good grade on this essay.
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