#see the difference between this and chris pratt

[red-might-be-dead]

hello hi here to force strange thoughts into your brain once again, this time about jrwi (wow who could’ve guessed)

been thinking about this for a little but it’s basically what i think some campaigns would be if not podcasts, i haven’t listened to some of the older ones so i’m sorry they’re not on here :(( if you have any ideas feel free to add them btw :DD

RIPTIDE!!!!! - really long animated series

not an anime though, no matter how much grizzly wants it, it would be an animation style where the characters could have very clearly different nose, face and body shapes, really pushing my riptide nose agenda here sorry, each episode would be like 20-40 minutes long and instead of coming out in seasons there would be massive gaps in between episodes, from 2-6 months long, to leave time for writers and animators to get stuff done (massive team of animators btw, i feel like it would be pretty successful)

PRIME DEFENDERS!! - comics

literally nothing else they could be, just really well made, well performing comics (i’ve already talked about this before you can stalk my talk tag if you really want to find it lmao), the comic company making them would be keeping well away from movies n shit btw

APOTHEOSIS!!! - i wasn’t really sure about this one to be honest

i had to ask my friend and she said anime which i don’t agree with but i can see it, i think maybe a short book series where each book is 150 - 300 pages and is about a different god they have to kill/a different episode, i think that works but if anyone has any better ideas please tell me :D!!

BLOOD IN THE BAYOU!!! - i hate to say it, i really do…

bitb would be a really long really good 80s horror book with strong homoerotic undertones, a satisfied fanbase and lots of active members in the community making fan comics, films, writing, theories and art ect… until well after the book came out……….. and then it would be made into the most egregious and awful live action movie you have ever seen, the most awful casting (like chris pratt as officer dudes….. throws up) and even worse sfx, oh yeah and the characters would be ruined and the story would become so butchered it wouldn’t make sense, they would do some shit like cut out becky so kian just kisses some random lady (removing both a really good and well written character and a layer of kian’s character that i think is super important) and make rolan really be an evil bug spy the whole time so rand has to kill him to save the town also add in a whole new sub plot that never existed like the rand family is secretly a long line of bug alien hunters or something fucking stupid like that and the entire fanbase would murder whoever thought re-writing the story was a good idea (ahaha can you tell ive been through something like this before ahahaha, character morals and motives being removed and whatnot ahahahhahahaha.)

anyways………

THE SUCKENING!!! - live action series

it would be well made though, unlike the bitb movie it would be its own original thing, have great makeup and effects also be well casted and well shot, well written, ect ect, it would bloody and gory and not suitable for people who can’t handle showing bones and organs all over everywhere, lots of shitty rip off merch would be made though and the fandom would be 99% gay little freaks (normal suckening enjoyers) and 1% homophobic straight white men who get mad whenever they see soda and emizel having gay sex on screen or whatever fag shit that biting thing was

again feel free to add your thoughts and ideas and shit in the reblogs it would be nice to read them :DD!!

#red rambles relentlessly #jrwi show #jrwi pd #the suckening #jrwi riptide #jrwi apotheosis #jrwi bitb #jrwi spoilers #jrwi the suckening #jrwi prime defenders #bitb spoilers #suckening spoilers #i think i wrote some shit that could be considered spoilers in those two sections #definitely the bitb one #which i definitely didn’t base around a certain netflix adaptation of one of my old favourite books cough cough #I HATE THAT FILM SO MUCH WHY DID YOU DO THAT TO SOPHIES CHARACTER SHE IS SUPPOSED TO BE A BITCH STOP TRYING TO MAKE HER NICE #anyways like maybe one person who sees this post will know what that’s referencing #and i will admit the books weren’t perfect but at least the characterisation made sense

[betterbemeta]

I feel like some things in the Jurassic World movies are actually a step backward in the science-fiction zone from Jurassic Park III. I think that was the one where it was revealed that the raptors had a 'language' and complex communication that implied not just 'intelligence' but 'sapience'-- and I understand that some people felt this jumped the shark a little.

(yes I know its a dream sequence, SHUT UP, they went there,)

But I remember seeing it when I was little and it made perfect sense to follow the original beats of how the raptors were scary in previous movies because they could interact with human environments like doors. They could use deception, 'tactics' and could not easily be contained.

If you're implying that these are beings that can reason, and further acting as if this reasoning ability is more threatening than the reasoning ability of a chimpanzee or something, then you're not afraid of 'what' is hunting you, but 'who.'

And that they could have reasons beyond being hungry bloodthirsty animals to be aggressive toward you.

That you have imprisoned 'people' and not 'animals' or even 'beneath animals' (creatures that have no natural existence, creations, toys, etc.)

But there's something disappointing to me about the stuff with Blue and Chris Pratt and all of that. It feels more like the fantasy of an animal tamer at a circus who has mastery of dangerous creatures (something that most modern circuses have cut) than it feels like a relationship with an intelligent creature capable of complex communication.

(Tell me how this is different from the image of a 'lion tamer' with a chair between him and his 'beasts?')

It doesn't even feel like the level of communication that you should be having with your dog, or cat. But the raptors of course obey Chris Pratt's fantasy expertise and fantasy rules surrounding their social behaviors because the point is to depict Chris's character as skillful. 'The right way to approach raptors' is whatever the writers want it to be, unlike real dogs, cats, horses, bears, big cats, etc.

In reality, there are a lot of failed 'animal whisperers' out there, hucksters that fake being an animal behaviorist to impose fantasy-like rules on animals while abusing them, and dominance-based trainers who get sued for animal abuse if they aren't attacked by the animals first.

The Jurassic World movies seem to mitigate this idea with that the raptors are not natural creatures (but living 'in the wild' seems to be a conclusion for at least one of them?) and that they vary in intelligence level, with Blue being the most intelligent. My issue with this is that complex communication required for coordination also requires multiple parties that understand it. Why aren't the raptors basically having constant misunderstandings between their differing mentalities, or misunderstanding their handler who doesn't seem to vary his approach between them?

Basically my point is. The place Jurassic Park was going, it was fine. You made Frankenstein's Monsters, classic sci-fi dilemma. It kind of sucks that they downgraded Dinosaur Frankensteins into... the emotional replacement for circus animals in the modern day when we know dancing bears and elephants aren't ethical. However 'cool' they are on their own, that type of creature in a narrative is there to demonstrate the bravery of their 'tamer' and any 'trust' the animal has with that tamer is just the same. It's not about any creature actually making its own decisions, let alone a highly intelligent one.

It doesn't really matter that Jurassic World movies try to have it both ways, with some lip service to 'respecting' the raptors, and sometimes other dinosaurs, showing the antagonists being 'disrespectful' by contrast. If we continued the themes from JPIII, the type of 'respect' that is supposedly the 'good' position, is not the kind of respect you'd want to give to a person.

#jurassic park #jurassic world #critical #disappointments I have #sci fi downgraded in favor of circus tricks I guess #long post #dinosaurs

[jelixpo]

So... did you like the movie? 😏

i thought it was really good! But I also joked with my parents that i probably would have enjoyed it regardless of what was on screen lol

my non-spoiler opinion of the movie is this

Mario and Luigi have a super wholesome relationship

Jack Black killed it as Bowser

Chris Pratt also did a really good job as Mario! I was surprised

Anya Taylor-Joy was just okay as Peach. Sometimes I thought her voice was a bit too deep in delivery for Peach but like 95% of the time I enjoyed it

I thought Seth Rogan was good as Donkey Kong but then again i'm not big into Donkey Kong so I might not be a good judge

also the movie seemed a bit short? And that's not just me saying that cause I wanted more, it felt like some scenes weren't fleshed out enough or had weird cuts between them. And I think I know who to blame for that (Mr 'let's remove all the story elements from Mario Galaxy 2 so it's basically just a Mario Galaxy DLC')

But!! Really enjoyable and I super recommend!

Okay, now under the cut I'll share my spoiler opinions

I'm gonna break up these bullet points differently cause like. It's a lot

THE BRO HUG AT THE END OF THE MOVIE. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!!!!

I know we didn't get a lot of Luigi which is a bummer but omg when he was on screen he stole the show!!

I also really liked the scene where they showed Luigi being taken onto the blimp and him envisioning his life where he's always had to be saved by Mario, and now he's in a situation where he doesn't even know if Mario is alive or not. It was a very quiet and introspective moment that, while it was rather short, I thought was really inciteful into Luigi's character and his relationship with the idea of bravery and how he views himself in comparison to Mario. And then!! The pay-off at the end of the movie where Luigi gets to be the one who saves Mario!! That was very sweet and I love that they showed that just cause Luigi's scared, doesn't mean he doesn't have courage!!

I liked the backstory that they gave Peach! And also the movie directly confirming that Peach is human in canon since that has been a question for people for a long time. I loved to watch her bounce around and show off her moves. And i love that they confirmed she's the ideas person! If they ever make plans, Peach is the one to recognize what to do, how to do it, and when. She's a proper strategist. I wonder if her parents are still alive in the human realm? And since she's from Brooklyn (I'm assuming she is anyway and that the pipe in Brooklyn is the only pipe on Earth, but maybe not) I wonder if her parents would have seen her face in the paper? Stuff to think about

Mario and Luigi have more brothers??? Once the movie comes out on services I'll have to get a closer look at both them and their VA's in the credits. I'm interested to see the age gap between all of them, since it seems like Mario and Luigi are closest with each other and not anybody else, which leads me to believe they're the closest in age and therefore grew up together in a more literal sense than with their other brothers (I assume so cause my dad has like 8 siblings and he's closest with my uncle who's only one year younger than him. Sibling bonds strengthen when you go through those toddler years together)

Also the movie was just really fucking funny. The Bowser song?? (I'll swing back around to that) Donkey Kong was super funny. Bowser himself had a ton of great lines. The line that made me laugh the hardest was when Mario and Donkey Kong were in the belly of the beast and Donkey Kong laments that his dad thinks he's a failure, Mario repeats the sentiment about his own dad, and Donkey Kong goes "Oh yeah? well HE WAS RIGHT YOU SUCK" that shit had me rolling. Great set-up and bait-and-switch.

okay Bowser song? HOLY SHIT THAT WAS INCREDIBLE. IT WAS TOO SHORT. I WOULD WATCH A 5MINUTE EXTENDED MUSIC VIDEO OF THE SONG GIVE IT TO ME NOW!!! (Also i watched Pretty Woman within 24 hours of watching the Mario movie and the two piano scenes had me... thinking about things (bowuigi))

I like that they didn't directly set up for a sequel. Like there are elements in the movie that could easily set up for it. Like Bowser being small and only needing to be hit once to be made big again. Peach's potential parents in Brooklyn, a more Luigi-centric adventure that fleshes out his small but present issue with courage and bravery, the clear set up for Captain Toad and the Toad Brigade, the fact that there were multiple different areas they could have gone into in the pink cloud 'work between worlds' place. I doubt it, but it would be very nice

also the ending kind of threw me for a loop? Honestly with Mario taking the giant bullet bill towards the warp pipe I thought the story was going to be that he sent the bullet bill through and it destroyed their warp pipe back home. And then that would directly set up for a sequel to try and get back home and explain why they would choose not to stay in Brooklyn

Also, i'm not entirely sold on why Luigi would want to stay in the Mushroom Kingdom? Like yeah Mario chose to stay, but he got to frolic in fields, do training missions, and get with a princess. Luigi got captured immediately, beaten up and thrown around, then almost died in lava at the end. Where does he see the positives in staying in the Mushroom Kingdom? I don't believe Mario would have been entirely sold on staying either given Luigi being in peril there the whole time. For them to stay, it would have had to be a unanimous decision between the two of them that I couldn't really see them making? But i guess it doesn't really matter. They needed Mario and Luigi to stay in the Mushroom Kingdom for continuity, so i guess it's fine

Kamek was great. 10/10 best supportive dad. "Dress in drag to help my adopted son practice his date with the girl he has a crush on? Say no more. Get me a matching tiara."

okay i was surprised how much they directly talked about violence? Like i'm super used to children's media where they dance around the topic of death with different phrases. "She's gone. She was shattered. He was forgotten. He didn't make it." That sort of stuff. It especially threw me off when Bowser was screaming about killing Luigi and making Mario watch. Like, damn. Dude is sadistic. The line almost felt like something out of a fic? But honestly it worked to make Bowser seem like a villain that really shouldn't be messed with. I think Bowser is often seen as a bit of a goofy villain, especially in comparison to some of Nintendo's other villains like Ganondorf who are and were depicted as sinister from day one. But this movie? Bowser has guns. Bowser kills people. Bowser beats the ever-loving shit out of Mario the second he meets him. This Bowser is not a force to be reckoned with.

Also his line when he's beating up Mario "You ruined everything! I was FINALLY gonna be happy!" like yooooooo. That has Bowuigi potential fr fr. And it's also crazy that Bowuigi fans have been saying this for years? Like Bowser is a very lonely, touch-starved individual, even with having kids. Every Bowuigi fic i've read has this element in them. And this movie really confirmed that those theories are true and I love that

and i think that's it! Once it comes out on services i'll watch it again and probably have more points to give

#super mario bros movie #super mario movie #super mario movie spoilers #spoilers super mario movie #mario movie #spoilers

[bearpillowmonster]

Transformers One Trailer

That new trailer and I have some thoughts? Surprisingly.

I don't normally watch trailers anymore and I've said why before but it basically boils down to they spoil too much too much of the time and what's the point if I'm sold anyway. Now Transformers One seems like a no-brainer, gives those fans a prequel origin sort of thing as well as an introduction for the newbies who only know the Bay and Rise and Bumblebee movies in animation no less so completely different. Then I saw the images of the designs and oh man0

It looks generic. Like I never watched Transformers Prime, it has its fans but I just do not like that art style and this started making me think of that, like it wasn't finished. I much would've preferred a 2D movie but 3D can be done, look at the War for Cybertron trilogy (which I've already talked about)

Nice and stylized, distinguished, scuffed metal, I wanna lick them. Anyways, that's a show though, it'd look good as a movie and heck, T-One looks good as a show but I don't know, is it just me? I also didn't finish the trilogy because the first one was good and I thought it'd only get better but reviews for the second one came out and they were bogus so I dropped it.

But then I watched the trailer-

And it looks better! Notice anything? They're all close up shots! And you mean to tell me this is the same movie>

Ugh. Visuals out of the way, cast. Why? We don't need all these celebrity voices and I'm someone who supports Peter Cullen just being Optimus all the time but I also understand that he's getting older just like Charles Martinet did with Mario leaving the character in a specific position but you didn't get Chris Pratt?? No I'm just kidding, we got Chris Hemsworth, and really, I can't even tell that it's him, I saw his name attached and I was like "Here we go again" and there are a few times where he had traces of that Cullen voice pattern and it's like an adolescent Optimus settling into his voice- wait am I complementing? Stop that.

Josh Cooley is directing and he's got a pretty decent track record with Pixar, we even see Keegan Michael Key again for whatever reason- oh, it's goofy, it's made for children

"But he says bad ass!" mehmehmehmehmeh, so do the other movies twit, somehow, someway, they get away with anything. He's gotta go and announce everything that's happening "I have knives?!" "I have machine guns in my butt?!" Stupid even for a kid, especially menaging Megatron, what'd you do to my angry baby? He's just reading the script, I know, which also isn't great. So, instead of just being a race of transformers, they're a race of robots that gain the ability to transform to save Cybertron. There's the generic nature again! I also don't see it in the trailer but with the toys, they have this weird thing where they use energy to summon their weapons? Bumblebee is fine with the "KNIVES" but

"I put my hand on a ba-all to see if I still bleeeeddd and nothing hurts anymore, I feel kinda freeeeee" What is that? Just give him an axe, he doesn't have to summon it and then attach it to a ball. But wait- the design is different here, what's going on? These toys don't match up with the movie. Like, look at Bumblebee before and after he transforms, he doesn't look like the toy does (I've used enough pictures, do some leg work) and Megatron...just looks like Megatron and I know these are movie toys, just look at Alpha Trion, so I don't know how much of it is an accurate conversion between the two and I normally wouldn't care but it's that ball that drives me bonkers.

BUT I will say that I support Scarjo playing- who is she playing? Because that's not Arcee. Elita One? Cool name, at least. Oh, she's an OG, we're good then. Lawrence is also a good one. Anyways, disappointed, we'll see.

#transformers #yeah #here i am in the future... #transformers one

[the-masked-reviewer]

The Super Mario Bro. Movie (2023) Review

Potential spoilers ahead...

This movie brought in the various Mario games really well. Some notable references include Luigi's Haunted Mansion while Luigi is in the dark lands, the jungle being all karts, the hat from Odyssey, and the barrels from DK. The fight scene between Mario and DK shows various other gorillas in the background, the rainbow road, and the star power in the final fight as well. There could've been more Yoshi, in my opinion, only showing a Yoshi herd and an egg in the background wasn't nearly enough. They also included aspects of players interacting with the world; such as players driving off rainbow road to gain an advantage, and learning to play the game the same way Mario learns on the practice course Peach shows him.

The animation feels like a combination of video game animation and cinematic animation. The movie's writing does an excellent job of committing to the bit; with the plumbing bit, Bowser's love for Peach, Mario being short, and Luigi being a coward are great examples. On the note of Luigi being a coward, it is clearly only there to make the dark lands/haunted mansion sequence make narrative sense.

The budget for the music in this movie is absolutely crazy and the amount of popular well-known songs on the soundtrack is insane (they could have used some of that money for…actual actors but we're not talking about that yet). During the big party at Bowser's, you can see his kids in the band, so respect the musical talents of the large ass turtles. The song "Peaches" is just as good is I had been lead to believe, and its honestly better than it should be considering what it actually is (Thank you Jack Black, you are a God).

The actual story of the movie was very interesting and manages to appeal to fans of all the different styles of Mario games. The best character in the whole movie is easily the blue star in Bowser's prison, hands down. The ending is clearly setting up for more movies and yet another franchise movie giant.

To top it all off, there's the issue with the casting and vocal performances. They should have just hired actual voice actors, not just actors who had names studio executives felt were big enough to gain attention. Jack Black, however, was fucking amazing. For starters, he did actually have voice acting experience, and Jack Black committed to the bit and was able to be thoroughly convincing in sounding like Bowser. Jack Black was easily the best VO performance in the entire movie, and if he wasn't in it, I'm not sure I'd've been able to finish the movie. Both Chris Pratt and Seth Rogan obviously didn't get the memo about committing to the bit. The beginning of the movie shows us Pratt doing the voice and the accent, but they come up with an excuse to get him to Not commit to the bit and instead he just talks like himself for the rest of the film. Pratt should've committed or just not done it at all. On top of that, you have Rogan saying in an interview that he told the casting department before they got him on board that "if I do it, I'm doing it as me" and after they heard that, they should have just walked away and found someone who would actually play Donkey Kong in way way that would wake the final product what it deserved to be.

#super mario #mario #mario bros #mario movie #super mario bros #bowser #the super mario bros movie #super mario movie

[doubleddenden]

I usually try not to let twitter or youtube posts bother me, but they just revealed Chris Pratt's voice in the new Garfield movie and people are saying shit like "it actually fits"

NO THE HELL IT DOES NOT FIT? I'm neutral at best to the little bastard but even I know he's supposed to sound like he's a bored piece of shit, like he's supposed to sell you Clear Eyes for Dry Eyes, like his zest for life is kept at a healthy 4, maybe a 3!

Chris just sounds way too generic, literally I can't hear a difference between this and his Mario. Fine, his voice acting skills are okay at best, but come on, man! At least ACT like you hate Mondays! I know the state of the world has gone to hell in a handbasket very quickly these last few months, but are people really that worn out? Are they that tired that they listen to this standard white guy cartoon voice and saying "Yeah that's Garfield?" Have some dignity!

Like bro next thing you know they're gonna cast Chris Pratt as Droopy Dog and take his very sad, flappy voice into a chipper "Oh yeah, THAT JUST HAPPENED!" generic white guy voice, and people will be like "oh my god that sounds just like him!" And it won't! It absolutely won't!

Btw I'm not actually that mad at the trailer, nor do I actually give a shit about Pratt, I'm just absolutely shocked at how people are just ROLLING OVER for this. Like don't y'all have have a little room left in your cold, bitter hearts for a little more hatred? Did we get capped off somewhere and I wasn't told? I have some hatred to spare! I'll share! Like are yall okay?

Anyway the rest of the trailer looks fine and cute animation wise and the beginning bit was adorable, if not forced, but it definitely feels generic. It's Garfield though which is already pretty generic, so you can't expect Into the Spider-Verse or Game of Thrones levels of story telling

Anyway here's the trailer if you want to see it

#garfield #garfield movie #Youtube

[madness-on-the-milano]

Milano's Trailer Breakdown Vol 1 Part Two

Sigh. Props to Chris Pratt, he really does look like a man whose girlfriend came back from the dead just to kick him in the babymakers twice. That's simplified of course, but you get my point. He's so beautiful but he's married and I have my own hero IRL. In another life, Chris.

I do find it interesting that Mantis is the one to share the wisdom that is staying true to your roots and not forgetting where you come from. I don't know her history - yet. Was she taken from her mother as a newborn baby? Do her species hatch from eggs? Was Ego always her home and family or did she have a life before? God, I can't deal with Mantis feels. Pom Klementieff just has this incredible, perfect delicate balance between soft, fragile innocent and steely badass for Mantis that I don't believe any other actress could duplicate.

Oh hell no. Oh hell no. This was what I was both eagerly anticipating and dreading. Baby Rocket. Those ears! Soft fluffy baby raccoon fur!

That motherfucker. I hate James Gunn. I just know that sadist picked out the cutest little baby raccoon he could find. I bet he had a big warehouse full of them and spent half of production choosing the cutest one just to torture us. That bastard.

He looks like he's just had a flashback here. Background shows people, so I'm thinking he's in Knowhere, perhaps reminiscing? Whatever is going on, he looks sad. Once again, I am torn between hating and loving James Gunn for this.

Who's the murderer? God knows but I think this must be the home or even breeding ground of the interdimensional beast that's coming up shortly. It's very similar to the creature itself.

Gamora!!! I would kill to see what's on that Polaroid. I hope it's a family photo. She's so cool about whatever's on there. Zoe Saldana has a really cool storyline here - her other life had it all. Sister, family, boyfriend, a little tree baby, free from abuser. But that other self is dead, now there's a group of people who love you, but you just do not know them at all and one in particular is seriously broken up about it. And you're a good person, you're a kind person so you feel bad for him but you've been through enough crap that you need to protect yourself, even and especially if he loves you. Zoe's playing a different Gamora for sure, but as always, she's just so perfect for the character.

See that wistful, yet focused look? Whatever was in that photo, Gamora longs for. My guess is, this is around the midway point of the movie, where she starts to make peace with what's gone on and maybe reconsiders Quill.

God this cracks me up. Nebula carrying Peter like he's a kid who is fell asleep in the car, Cosmo trotting eagerly along, Mantis distractedly staring around...

And let's not forget Rocket's smoothie. On a more serious note, it's sad that they're acting like Quill getting blackout drunk is completely normal. Which it most likely is due to the everything that went on.

#rocket raccoon

[nintooner]

I finally watched the Mario movie 😭 The drive-in we went to was a little bit crappy (the audio had this crackling in the background), and there was a little bit of rain in the middle of the movie but none of that ruined the experience

(Obviously this post contains Mario movie spoilers, if you haven't seen it yet)

As a lifelong Mario fan, I was literally smiling like an idiot throughout the whole thing, because of course I was 😆

I kinda wish I had some Mario fan friends to watch it with so we could have gushed about all the references together haha (I watched it with my parents, and they're Mario fans too, but not as intensely as me, so they only picked up on some of the references)

Let me tell you I internally popped off when they had the Captain Toad theme playing during Toad's introduction scene. My boy Captain Toad got a reference 😎

Also Gusty Garden in the credits had me humming along, I always can't help but sing along to that song (If I was in the car by myself, I would have been singing it out loud lol)

My favourite part of the movie was just the brotherly love between Mario and Luigi, that shit was so wholesome 😭 It really reminded me of their bond in the Mario & Luigi games

Peach was a bit of a girlboss as I feared, but I feel it ended up being justified since she's been living in this world her whole life, while Mario is brand new to it and has no clue what's going on at first. And by the end she and Mario (and the rest of the gang) are working together as a team

Speaking of, I was pleasantly surprised to see a tiny bit of Peach backstory 😳 The implication that she's from the "real world" too... I feel like they could explore that more in a sequel. Also I loved how protective she was of the Toads, since they pretty much raised her... More wholesome shit

And it was bizarre but cool to see Mario and Luigi's family! I knew going into the movie that their dad was voiced by Charles Martinet, and I could immediately tell when I heard his voice. Eternal respect to the absolute chad Charles 🫡

Obviously Bowser slapped, but you don't need me to tell you that, you already know it 😆 He was the perfect combination of intimidating and goofy. And the wedding outfit from Odyssey...! The king of fashion... And that Peach love song... He's so multitalented!

And of course, since my favourite Mario character is... well, Mario himself, I just loved him throughout the whole movie. They portrayed him pretty much perfectly. He's so funny and cute and determined and just a loveable everyman. That's kinda the whole appeal of his character; that he's a regular working man in this crazy fantasy setting, and despite his ordinary-ness he always gives it his all and saves the day! And Chris Pratt did a really good job on the voice, contrary to what we all feared upon hearing the voice cast announcement – it's obviously different to what we're used to, but a great alternate take on Mario imo

I really liked the bickering relationship between Mario and Donkey Kong, that was really funny 😆

I also popped off a little when they had that quick Diddy, Dixie & Chunky Kong cameo. Just completely unexpected lol (Sad Kiddy wasn't there though 😔 They left him at home 😔😔😔)

This movie was a love letter to Mario fans! And apparently kids really love it too from what I've heard, so it hit the mark for both of its main target audiences: kids and Mario fans

My mum had but a single complaint: No Waluigi (He's her favourite character)

I assured her that he'll probably show up in one of the inevitable sequels 😆

#And now I'm gonna go to bed and conk out #And probably dream about Mario 😆 #personal crap #Btw we are now officially Covid negative 😎😎😎

[themosleyreview]

The Mosley Review: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3

Ladies and gentlemen, we have witnessed a master storyteller achieve something that is increasingly rare these days. When a director has a set vision and direction he wants to take a story, it is harder nowadays to succeed in executing it without studio interference. From what I can tell, writer and director James Gunn fully had his hands on the reins and he delivered a much darker, topical and emotional story that I haven't seen in the MCU since the first 10 years of Marvel. The tone of a ragtag, dysfunctional and yet functional family has continued throughout their films and in their mini adventures in other appearances in other MCU films. What I loved about this film is that it lets you know right away that this was gonna be a different tale of pain, love and growth. The first film was all about the group getting together. The second film was about Peter Quill's origins and now this film pays off the many illusions to a certain characters' traumatic past to say it lightly. The trademark comedy, soundtrack and action is all their and it is even more exciting and brutal than ever before and the stakes are actually high. I actually feared that at anytime the characters could die which is a safety net that needs to be pulled more often in comic book films. All the events these characters have been through and the effect it has on all of them is on display in the most devastating and sometimes heartwarming ways.

Chris Pratt returns as Peter Quill/Star Lord and he is more depressed and heartbroken then ever. I liked seeing him take on the fact that he was falling apart with the love of his life gone, but her younger self if is alive. The insane emotional turmoil within him was refreshing and matured the character to another level. When his family is under attack, you get to see him fully unleash his killer rage. Zoe Saldana returns as Gamora and she is more blood thirsty and more in line with how she was in the first film before she met Peter. Zoe takes the character in a much harder edged direction and she created a new identiy to the character that was tough to watch. Her scenes with Peter were truly heartbreaking as he would express his love to a woman whom has no idea about their past. Karen Gillan was exceptional as the constantly irritated Nebula. She tends to take the lead at times and I liked her tenacity. The growth this character has had truly pays off in so many subtle and abrasive ways. Dave Bautista was just as fun and loveable as Drax the Destroyer. He may be a big goof most of the time, but this film speaks to the heart of the character and how he has grown away from the vengeful spirited fighter to a loving father figure. Pom Klementieff was so much fun as Mantis and more involved this time around. She turned into the voice of truth in the family and their is a particular scene where she lets it all out. Her, Drax and Nebula together have the biggest fight in the film between each other and it was rough to watch, but important. Families have their fights and arguments and that was an important moment for this crew to have. Nathan Fillion was fun as Master Karja, an orgosentry and I loved his comedic timing in the middle of an otherwise tense scene. Vin Diesel as Groot was good and I loved that he had some of the most badass and intense action scenes. Elizabeth Debicki returns as Ayesha and I liked seeing her fulfill her mission from the end of the second film. Will Poulter was fun as Adam Warlock and I liked that he insanely over powered, but he wasn't the typical antagonist. He may have had the mentality of a child, but throughout the film you get to see him mature. I'm curious to see where he goes from here. Sean Gunn was great as Kraglin and I loved that we get to see him fully embrace his talents as a leader and how he handles the needle given to him by Yondu. Maria Bakalova was fun as Cosmo and I loved her scenes the most with Kraglin as their chemistry grows throughout the film.

Like I said before, the first 2 films had a center point, but this film had a central focus on one of the most complex characters of the family and that was Rocket Racoon. Bradley Cooper gives a heart shattering performance as the character and his backstory is fully explored. If you could not tell from the trailers, this was going to be something so much more personal and it truly was. The amount of experimentation, physical, emotional and psychological torture Rocket was subjected to was on full display and was not for the faint of heart. His story broke me in a way that I haven't felt since the original 1987 film Robocop. You see where his brilliance and inventiveness was created, but it is full of sorrow. His friends were the heart of him and I loved their scenes together. Asim Chaudhry and Mikaela Hoover were adorable as the voices of Teefs and Floor. Their character designs as the heavily experimented on walrus and rabbit were horrific, but their personalities were sweet. Linda Cardellini was amazing and heartwarming as the otter, Lilah. Her kindness out shined their harsh reality and I loved her chemistry with Rocket the most. Their love story was so engaging and beautiful and will bring tears to your eyes. Chukwudi Iwuji as the High Evolutionary will go down as one of the best villains of the MCU. His performance was truly brilliant and unhinged as he perfectly portrays a monster of a zealous man with an insatiable God complex. He is the new definition of a mad scientist and I hated him the moment we saw his creations. He was a smart man, but cruel and unrelenting. His scenes with Batch 89 and especially with Rocket were truly the most soul crushing parts of the film.

John Murphy's score was out of this world and emotionally charged. It was big, operatic and enhanced the sadness and dread of Rocket's scenes and all the emotional turmoil of the Guardians. Even listening to it now, as I type this review, it brings tears to my eyes and joy as we get to hear the "Guardians Theme" once again in epic fashion. Visually, the film has its trademark colorfulness and inventive cinematography. The action in this film is bigger than ever and there is an epic one take corridor action scene that was insane. Writer and Director James Gunn had made a promise to deliver a personal and engaging story for the final film in his trilogy with the Guardians and he did just that in the most epic way possible. The studio truly gave him carte blanche to his vision of how it will all end. No matter how intense, violent and soul crushing it may be. This is hands down, from start to finish, the best Marvel film I have seen in a VERY long time. Yes there have been good films in the recent state of the MCU, but this film shows that you can focus on story first instead of spectacle and it will work. There are 2 credit scenes and they're both fun in their own special way. This was definitely one of the best films of the year and I highly advise parents that this film isn't the kid friendly tone of the past films. Its more mature and bring a lot of tissues. Let me know what you thought of the film or my review in the comments below. Thanks for reading!

#guardians of the galaxy vol 3 #Chris Pratt #zoe saldana #Bradley Cooper #dave bautista #karen gillan #pom klementieff #vin diesel #will poulter #linda cardellini #sean gunn #nathan fillion #Chukwudi Iwuji

[jurassic-park-incorrect-quotes]

On the scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate Jurassic World Dominion?

(This becomes a very long post that goes all over the place, so I apologise. If your attention span is as short as mine, I won’t be offended if you just “too long, didn’t read”)

This is actually quite difficult for me to answer, because I’m easy to please when it comes to films - if I had fun watching it then to me it was a good film. And I had a lot of fun watching Dominion. So I’ll try putting on a logical head for this one.

Spoiler free opinion: 8/10

I’ll go more in depth with my opinion which means I will openly talk about stuff that happened in the film. So serious spoiler warning! (All you asked was to rate the film out of 10 but I guess I’m going full opinion time!)

Ok. I loved this film. Seeing Alan, Ellie and Ian back as main characters was OF COURSE a big part of that. I also loved seeing the dinosaurs in the world, how they were with the humans and other animals. And I liked that the ending was “so yeah. Nothing’s changed from the beginning. Dinosaurs are in our world now so deal with it.” With the exception that the humans and animals were no longer fighting back. The parallel between the beginning where the horses were being used to round up the Paras and the end where they’re a unified herd was great. And I liked Alan’s last look at a little girl playing with a dinosaur. It was him seeing that dinosaurs and man could co exist.

The amount of different dinosaurs was great! And the animatronics were. Top. Notch. That giga animatronic is beautiful. The scene where Maisie is with those workers and they watch the brachiosaurus in solemn silence was really nice actually. I liked the lack of dialogue. You could hear some indistinguishable shouts in the background and Maisie whispers to that one guy about the flare, but the fact you couldn’t hear what any of them were saying was just a nice way of showing what was going on without the brachiosaurus’ majestic moment being sullied by dialogue. It was just a nice gentle moment. I like how the franchise has used brachiosaurus as a symbol of peace amongst humans and dinosaurs since the Sleeping in the Tree scene in the first one. I feel like every time they show a brachiosaurus dying, it symbolises current animosity between the humans and dinosaurs - see: Jurassic World + JW: Fallen Kingdom. So maybe this little scene shows us (foreshadows??) that humans and dinosaurs can find a way to co exist. Maybe I’m thinking way too deeply into this.

Another thing I really liked was the family dynamic between Claire, Owen and Maisie. I felt this was the film where I liked Owen the most (don’t get me wrong, I liked his character a lot in the last two films, unpopular an opinion that is in the fandom). He felt more mature and grown up, less selfish and less quips, and I haven’t seen anyone actually acknowledge that yet. Although, that’s probably due to him being played by Chris Pratt and I understand that separating actor from character can be hard - a post for a different time.

As I was saying, I liked their little family. It was shocking to actually see a Jurassic Park couple stay together from the previous film. A first in the franchise I think! I’ve enjoyed Claire’s story throughout the 3 films, and it hasn’t ever felt forced to me. Trying to make up for treating the dinosaurs as money making attractions rather than the animals they are is a simple but good idea to make her character likeable. Maisie was a little grating at the beginning - girl, they’re literally trying to protect you! You are old enough to understand why they’re not letting you beyond the bridge! - but I could understand why she was fed up. Bet they didn’t even have WiFi in that cabin.

The bad guys were good enough, and they served their purposes. It would’ve been nice to see Dodgson act like book Dodgson though. The nice, friendly Dodgson when he’s welcoming Alan and Ellie to BioSyn, but in truth is cold-hearted and has no qualms about letting his underlings die to progress his company. That way I feel like his death would’ve been much more satisfying (don’t get me wrong I was grinning like a maniac the entire scene. It was still good to see an end to the guy responsible for starting the franchise).

Alan, Ellie and Ian were damn near perfect in this film and I’m disappointed that we only got the one scene of just the three of them together - a scene that was mainly Ellie and Ian talking plot related stuff while Alan was arguing with a barista (on behalf of all baristas, I apologise. You are my favourite character of the entire franchise Alan. I love you). Don’t get me wrong, I found that really funny, and it fits Alan’s character - see: Alan + Computers in the first film - but I wanted a whole scene of three of them. Maybe they’re discussing something together, and then the conversation escalates to Alan and Ian getting into one of their classic arguments until they realise Ellie’s gone quiet. And she’s just stood watching them like “… you guys done?” And then they split.

And then of course, they needed a second scene of them either:

Traversing the lands, somehow separated from the Jurassic World characters, where they maybe talk about how they never actually did the whole “surviving dinosaur infested jungle” thing together. Alan did it first with just Lex and Tim and then the second time the entirety of JP3, Ellie did it with Muldoon (rip) for a short while, and Ian only really did it in The Lost World, as he was resting up injured since Rexy broke out in the first film. They could come across Rexy, either as a short Dino hunt scene or as maybe just a nostalgic scene (she could be sleeping or something when they come across her and they realise she’s the same one from JP due to her age and scars)

There wouldn’t have been time, but it would’ve been cool if they’d taken the tour with Ian and we get a call back to the three of them in the car, maybe Ian flirting with Ellie a little and Alan is less than impressed. Or maybe it could have been a really nice catching up bit. Ellie telling them about her kids growing up and being in college and what she’s up to. Ian telling them about his own kids, perhaps slipping in something about his daughter Kelly having been with him on Sorna. At least give us a hint as to what Sarah’s up to? Are they still together? Where is she? It would be nice. And then Ian asks Alan what he’s up to and he just says he’s doing what he’s always been doing, and leaves it at that. Again, they could see Rexy while on the tour and like I said before, is just a nice throw back moment. I would say they could go through the lab area and try going in to see it, breaking in, but at that point it would just be ripping scenes from the first one (but man do I love the three of them simultaneously breaking out the seats. They’re so great I love them!)

The throwbacks and references to the old films were really nicely done, I thought! First of all, they didn’t just reference the first film. A lot of “final” films in a franchise do the whole nostalgia awakening thing, but they usually just use stuff from the first one - aka the most well known and liked one. But they didn’t. In fact there was a surprising amount of JP3 references! E.g. Billy’s 3D printed raptor vocal chamber thingy was on Alan’s desk in his tent, and you can’t tell me you didn’t hear Amanda Kirby screaming “BEN?!?!?!” in your head when Claire was hanging in the parachute from the tree. I thought overall, the references were tasteful and not forced in your face. You could say the giga hunting them around the car was directly ripped from Rexy’s after-Gennaro car tossing, but I felt there was enough difference for it to once again be a nice throwback. Actually, I like that scene a whole lot. It’s one of the bits where the film especially feels like a Jurassic Park movie, which to me wasn’t felt all the way through the film (more on that later). I liked how real Maisie was when the giga was chomping down on the bars around her. I didn’t blame her for freezing in terror, and I thought the acting from her in that bit was really good! However I didn’t like the film making me think Ian was going to die. Felt for sure like the film was going to go “haha! The original characters aren’t immortal! Nostalgia won’t save them from being eaten! They’re all in the same boat” but I’m really glad they didn’t do that.

I’m surprised they sidelined Blue for the entire movie! She basically just said “you better get my kid back” and dipped. I think it was for the best, she wouldn’t have fit in with everything else going on. But she was such a big part of Jurassic World and Fallen Kingdom, and after seeing the raptors in all three JP films as lethal and to be avoided at all costs, it was a big thing to see a raptor/keeper relationship that wasn’t based on mutual hatred (Muldoon and the Big One were totally Owen and Blue’s opposites). Not to mention the toys and other money making products they got from her, it was quite shocking for her to be absent and unmentioned for the majority of the film.

I liked how they had Rexy win against the Giga, honestly! She had to win, because she is the Queen of Jurassic Park, obviously. But this jester prancing about in her court was bigger than her and a lot younger than her. Rexy was there from the beginning and she’s been in a few tough fights! The Big One gave Rexy iconic scars but she was young and had a massive advantage at that time. When she was up against the Indominous, she was fairly old and almost didn’t make it. And then with the Giga, she had been through and suffered a lot, and she was even older. Yet she still got a bit of damage in there. I was about to throw hands when they made it look like she had been killed. I liked that the Therizinosaurus got some hits in before Rexy got up to finish the giga off. It was a good way of killing the Giga without taking the moment away from the franchise’s most iconic dinosaur, even when the odds were against her. In true Rexy fashion, as seen with Blue, that one Carno and now the Therizinosaurus, she gave her assisting Dino a nod and let them go. I just hope that Alan, Ellie and Ian saw the end of that fight, I don’t want them thinking Rexy died. And she’s got family now? She’s not the only T-Rex any more?? Good stuff. She’s the Matriarch of that little family for sure.

Now for some things that brought down my opinion to an 8/10.

The characters should’ve all met up a lot sooner, I felt. Just as you were settling into the story of the Jurassic World characters, it would cut to scenes of the OG 3 and you were immediately sucked into it. So when it cut back you had to try and focus on them while trying not to wish it would go back to Alan, Ellie and Ian. If they’d met up sooner, you’d be able to focus on the Jurassic World characters’ stories as well as get more OG 3 content.

The plot line with Maisie and her mum. I did like it and found it interesting. But honestly it felt like I was watching a different film entirely. It didn’t feel like I was watching a Jurassic Park film, just another SciFi. I mean, I get that if they can clone dinosaurs from incomplete dna, then they can do it with humans, and I liked how they tied in “filling the gaps in the genome sequence” thing. But there was something about that plot line. I don’t know.

Disappointed we didn’t get any information on some of the other main characters from past films. When we saw Barry again, we got to see quick pictures of Vivian and Lowery, which was nice, but. How about Sarah Harding? Or maybe Zach and Gray? Or most of all, Timmy and Lex? Couldn’t they have asked Ariana if she didn’t mind putting down the paintbrush to do a small cameo? And I’m sure Joe Mazzelo would have loved to have at least done a scene. He still put Jurassic Park pictures and stuff on his Social Media. He’s still an actor! Timmy and Lex were iconic. And Claire could’ve at least had a line or something where she tells Owen that she was talking to her sister on the phone and that the boys are doing ok. But I am at least grateful we got our original 3 back.

The film kind of forgot that Alan was a beacon of survival in the franchise. His knowledge of dinosaurs helped them survive in Jurassic Park and Jurassic Park ///. “We look for your son… in the direction he’s going” - Mr Udeski, 2001, gone but not forgotten. You stick with Alan, you do as he says, you live to tell the tale. It would’ve been great to have a “what do we do?” scene where they all just turn and look expectantly at Alan. Instead, he was just kind of there to do… not a lot of Dino related stuff to be honest. Ellie told him to get the locust, so he did, He could’ve tested Maisie’s knowledge of dinosaurs when they were just the three of them, like he did with Timmy. Or he could’ve had a scene to himself, a moment to remind the audience who the original Main Character was from the first film. I just love Alan so much, he needs the recognition he deserves!

They never found out what Dodgson did. They never found out that he hired Nedry. Imagine a scene where the OG 3 find that out and absolutely tear him a new one between the three of them. Alan, Ellie and Ian went through way too much in this franchise for them not to get the chance to verbally eviscerate Dodgson for his greed and desire to be ahead in the genetics race. That, along with them tweaking his character to be more like his book self, would just make it perfect. I’d eat it up. His “Dennis Nedry sends his regards” Dilo death was chef’s kiss though. I’d keep all that for sure!

I don’t know if it was just me but… there weren’t that many kills. The most we got was the breakout in Malta. BioSyn was full of Red Shirt employees! But they just got sent home? Did I miss a massacre or was this film just really merciful? Maybe it’s because the group was full of main characters from the pat films so they couldn’t kill off anyone there. So like, have some characters of note amongst the BioSyn workers and University students who get eaten! It just surprised me how so few people died in the final film of the Jurassic Park franchise.

Now for some miscellaneous things I couldn’t write a paragraph on:

I liked Alan and Ellie with Maisie. It was nice to see 2 characters from the very beginning, who had seen everything throughout the franchise, with a character who was not only new, but only just starting her life really. Thinking about it, Maisie was quite lucky! She got parents in her first film, and grandparents in her second! Nice. It would’ve been good to see Alan have a moment with her, maybe bringing back the whole “Alan isn’t good with kids but hey, he’s trying!”

Barry. Is. Back! And it was great to see him. Was very scared they were going to kill him off, although death by raptor would’ve been fitting. Sorry you never got to say goodbye to Delta, Barry. :(

Where did Zia go??? She was in the one scene at the beginning and then disappeared. Glad to see my boy Franklin again, shame we didn’t get to see his bestie Zia though.

Pleasantly surprised they let Dodgson’s protégée guy live. I was prepared to say goodbye as soon as we met him. He was prime Red Shirt material.

I liked how they branched out from just Dinosaurs! Of course Pterasaurs have been in for a while, and there was the Mosasaurus, but seeing the cute little Diictodon (took me back to Primeval with Sid and Nancy) in Malta was nice, and the Dimetrodon drowning itself to do a JP3 Spinosaurus reference was cool too! (Although I was a little disappointed it wasn’t an actual Spino. I know there’s no way a Spino would fit in those mines, and it did defy everything by killing a T-Rex, but I did love it. The roar, the design… it was cool).

Carno/Allo team up (Think it was an Allo)! Literally looked at each other like “it’s you and me against the world” before eating people left right and centre. Hope they’re doing ok.

Speaking of, I want to just gently hold the baby Carno. Even if it bites me. Dinosaur King taught me the Carnotaurus love!

I also want a Dimorphodon to sit on my arm like a parrot so we can also stare at strangers walking past like an old pirate in a tavern.

Alan triangulating around Beta with Owen and Maisie was great. You could see the respect he has for the creature, the fear he has for it, and the amazement that he’s helping control a Velociraptor all at the same time. Like, he’s seen the intelligence of these creatures and he’s seen them kill. He’s studied them and their habits. And now he has a measure of control over one. I just really liked that. This is just me as a Muldoon fan, but he could’ve slipped in a line like “Robert would be turning in his grave if he knew we were trying to save this thing” but hey it’s not too big of a deal.

I reckon, if they did want to confirm that kid from the first film was Owen, they could’ve done it in the same scene. When Alan was saying that they now know Raptors went straight for the throat instead of gutting, Owen could’ve said something about how he didn’t need to traumatise him with the raptor claw fossil when he was a kid. Would’ve put Owen in the Alan Grant Fanclub right next to Eric and Timmy, who he quotes - “I read your book” - and would explain how he got the job at Jurassic World in the first place. A tough navy guy who’s interest in Velociraptors means he knows stuff about them too. It just works.

I was kind of disappointed when Owen showed up and scared off those Dilos, kind of felt like “ok, there you go, years of wanting the dilophosaurus back and now you’ve had your scene. Shove off.” So I thought, hey, we’ve seen them again after all these years (not just a hologram), I am happy! Just hearing those little chirrups filled my heart right up. Shame they’ve only ever claimed Dennis. But I thought too soon! Very satisfying that the dinosaur that killed the guy he hired also came for him too. Just a shame we never saw a body or anything like that.

I’m actually surprised how happy I was to see Wu get a good ending. He was never a bad guy per se, but you did sort of think that if he died, he’d deserve it. Or I did, anyway. So to see how run down and exhausted he was, as well as how much he wanted to do something good with his work, it was really nice to see him fix one of his mistakes. That bit where he was celebrating in the end, throwing his hands up in excitement and relief? I was happy for him. Hope he got to retire somewhere nice and peaceful.

Can you believe this film cuts out TellTale’s Jurassic Park: The Game from being canon? Because I know Rexy crushed that can. Unless Dodgson hired someone to make an old Barbasol can look like it had been buried in mud, he must have recovered it when Jurassic World was being built. How he managed to sneak in and get it i don’t know. And why he’d go through the effort of recovering it when the embryos inside are useless. He’s sentimental I guess. I can understand that. Really added to his death scene.

I liked how it ended. There’s enough there to make another film if they wanted to, but also, it’s a really nice way to end it all. It all ties back to stuff talked about in the first film. I love it.

And one last thing before this whole thing is finally posted: it’s been 29 years since Jurassic Park was released. Despite being a couple in the first one, Alan and Ellie never kissed - cause, you know. They were stuck on an island with dinosaurs killing people all over the place, they didn’t have time to kiss (not looking at you Claire and Owen. People being attacked and killed by pterasaurs everywhere, not a good time to be making out). I think that’s why there’s a slew of people who are adamant Alan and Ellie were never a couple, somehow ignoring the whole “Ellie wants kids but Alan doesn’t” thing throughout the film. Strange running theme to have between two characters who are just friends right? Anyway, our hopes were dashed by Jurassic Park /// annoyingly following book canon. So thank you, Jurassic World: Dominion, for giving us that Alan x Ellie kiss we’ve been waiting for since 1993. And it happened when they were nice and safe away from dinosaurs. In the cinema I was in, someone literally said “it’s about time!” When she kissed him. Cause yeah, it was. Alan and Ellie are canon, y’all.

8/10 overall

Great film (in my opinion)

#hey…. #you reading this? #you got this far? #I’m sorry #all you wanted was a rating #anything I missed I’ll just turn into a separate post #not a quote #jurassic park #jurassic world #jurassic world dominion #jurassic world dominion spoilers #dominion spoilers #Jurassic world: dominion #long post

[bahamutgames]

The AFTERTHOUGHTS Movie

Movie: The Super Mario Bros. Movie (April 5th, 2023)

Console: Fuckin' uuuuuuuh.... DVD player....

I wanted to do this when the movie launched but thought to myself "oh I could write my thoughts up in a twitter thread who cares what I think about mario bleh bleh bleh" so I didn't bother. But like 5 months have passed since I first saw the movie. I've watched it about 4-5 times now and I STILL haven't written up my thoughts. So no, clearly I CANNOT write my feelings up in a twitter thread. And YEAH, no one cares what I think about Mario I'm very aware of that. But FUCK YOU I'm gonna tell you why I think this movie is actually amazing!

I've been seeing some people talk about it lately but most comments I see about it nowadays are a little negative. And a lot of the sentiment around this movie before launch was negative. I was in this boat too prior to the first trailer coming out. But I gotta be honest, no, like. I really really REALLY like this movie. And I just gotta gush about it a little bit.

EVEN FOR A MOVIE (which I'll probably never do this again until maybe Sonic 3 comes out lol) THIS IS NOT A REVIEW! This is just me throwing up my thoughts on the movie now that I've watched it like 200000 times.

MARIO MOVIE SPOILERS AHEAD!! IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT YET WATCH IT I SWEAR TO GOD WATCH IT IT'S GOOD!!!

Opening

So, some of you may know, some of you may not. I used to be a big Mario fan. I've mentioned it in the past on twitter and such but this series used to be my LIFE. I'm not kidding. I was obsessed with it for YEARS, since I was child. I loved studying it and brainstorming headcannon and thinking about it and learning about it and just talking about lore stuff with people from the series. And I'll be honest, while lately I'm kinda still into it here and there, I haven't been super into it that intensely in a long while. For a lot of reasons. So I was very hesitant on the Mario movie. I wasn't sure if I was gonna like it. But I went in DAY 1 to see this movie. I had faith, I had to see how it would go.

And when I left that theater I was BLOWN AWAY. I LOVED IT!! I went and I saw it again about a week later. And I STILL LOVED IT! I bought it on DVD and rewatched it 2-3 more times with the rest of my family and I STILL LOVED IT EVERY TIME! It's not perfect by any means but in this chaotic write up I hope I can explain why it hit me so hard as a returning Mario fan. To get it out of the way, I'm gonna open up with my problems with it and then go into the praise.

Stuff I didn't like

So again, I do have some complaints so I'd like to start there just to get them out of the way. First up, I still have a problem with some voice actors. For the most part, they're all pretty good. I think Chris Pratt is better than the trailers would have you believe (which I fucking called I knew they were picking his worst lines for the trailer) and I was pleasantly surprised with how good Seth Rogan was for DK. Bowser, Toad, Luigi, they were all great! But dude Cranky's voice SUCKS so bad. I hate it. And I liked Peach but I wasn't in love with the voice? But not as bad as Cranky lmao.

And the pacing IS weird. This is a big issue I've seen a lot of people complain about and it's totally fair. It's not well paced. I think it's better on rewatches, but it's not perfect by any means. Like they jump back and forth between Mushroom Kingdom and Dark Land so much but at the same time Luigi just kind of isn't in it enough? It's very weird. And I feel like it progresses a little oddly between the different areas. But ultimately again, it's fine it's not as bad as people say even though it is weird.

And of course, the issue of removed music. I think that pretty much all the copywritten songs used in the movie were the wrong choice when the remixes that were absolutely superior were available. 'I Need A Hero' works for sure, I didn't mind that. But 'Take On Me' is SO out of place especially when they had a fantastic DKC remix to use for that! THANK GOD they actually used the Starman theme cause it would've ruined what was otherwise one of my favorite Mario scenes ever (we'll get to it).

Also, like, Toad is just toadally dropped by the end of the movie. He barely speaks towards the end and it's a shame cause I LOVED Toad in this movie! He absolutely deserved more attention in the second act of the movie. Thankfully he still shows up even though he barely gets to participate (did he even fight in the final battle? I hope he did)

And I have some other nitpicks. No Toadsworth L. Not enough powerups get used. Again, not enough Luigi.... Why is Lumalee in it? I assume it's to build up to something in the sequel. But still. Odd. BUT other than that? Man I just gotta sing the praises. There's so much positive to talk about.

Stuff I liked

OKAY! There's a lot I gotta compliment with this movie. For some basic stuff. It looks LOVELY! I love everyone's design! Mario and Luigi are so cute, Toad easily could've been creepy but they make them work fantastically, DK looks cute, BOWSER IS AMAZING! Peach looks a little odd but I still think she's very beautiful to me! And the environments are super stunning. The Mushroom Kingdom looks great, Dark Land looks fantastic, Rainbow Road looked SO GORGEOUS! And the music is AMAZING! So many cues from so many different games and themes. The basic Mario themes, Bowser's various themes, Galaxy stuff, there's even a cut SMRPG song apparently!? The music is amazing and relistening to it now it's blowing me out of the water all over again!

I know it's gonna sound like I'm overhyping it or exaggerating. But this movie is SUPER good with how it handles the source material. It's pretty much exactly what I would want out of a Mario movie at least in terms of how the world is presented. The shots of Mario overlooking the Mushroom Kingdom on the big shroom is AMAZING. All the hills and mushrooms and floating blocks. I adore the way it takes game mechanics like power ups and floating blocks and puts them into a non-game setting in a way that works SO well. In a way I've always envisioned the world to work myself. I LOVE seeing blocks as naturally occurring things in the Mario world. I love when Mario first appears in the world and you see Biddybuds walking around, you see Cheepcheep swimming, you see even a fucking Bramball walking exactly how it does in the games but like, it's not in a game! It's alive! They took how these creatures act and put them in a living world exactly how they would be! It's amazing! They even managed to take traditional Mario levels like the Cheepcheep bridges and turn them into a real area you could visibly see yourself walking in! It's not just in a video game it looks and breathes like it's real! Does this make any sense? I'm blown away by how they put game stuff into it but it doesn't feel like game stuff, it feels how this game stuff would feel irl. I love how they explain the powerups, I didn't think they'd even touch the Super Mushroom! But the idea it makes it you taller and gives you super human jumping is GENIUS! That's perfect! I hadn't even seriously considered how the growing and shrinking works, but this movie does it perfectly!

I think the best example I can give about this is the scene where they are camping in a field of fire flowers. This scene is genuinely amazing to me. This is a setting I've always DREAMED of seeing in a Mario game. But it's just not exactly something you'd ever get to see in a Mario game, but this movie does it. I LOVE seeing the power ups being naturally occurring in nature. Naturally occurring Fire Flowers are something I LOVE thinking about in my own head canon. They look so gorgeous in this movie and the whole scene looks so amazing. I love seeing Peach grab one and the slow transformation sequence and how they turn that into a practical thing and how Peach uses the Fire Flower not as a video game weapon or item, but just as a simple tool to start a campfire. I don't know if I'm describing it well enough but this is stuff I've always DREAMED about the Mario universe working like if you lived there. But somehow this movie just GETS IT. Naturally occurring floating blocks, powerups growing in nature, enemies existing in nature as animals! It's perfect!

And even the crossover between the "real" and "mushroom" worlds are done SO well! I am a pretty staunch "Mario was BORN in the Mushroom World and there is no Real World" kinda guy but this movie brings it back PERFECTLY. I love seeing Mario and Luigi as kind of losers? It's not an angle you ever really see with them, not that I need to have a sad NSMB game where Mario and Luigi are losers, of course lmao. But still it's neat! And seeing them living a normal life is cool! It's something we've gotten from previous Mario projects but never really with the games or something that follows the games so faithfully. But I adored seeing this side of their lives in a way that usually I'm not super die hard into as "canon"? If that makes sense? But I LOVED seeing the Mario family. I audibly GASPED when they showed up!! LIKE WHAT!? OFFICIAL MARIO MOM AND DAD FACE REVEAL!?!? I NEVER WOULD'VE SAW THIS COMING AND I DON'T THINK PEOPLE APPRECIATE HOW INSANE IT IS TO SEE MARIO RELATIVES IN 2023!!! THAT'S NUTS I NEVER THOUGHT THAT WAS GONNA HAPPEN BUT AGAIN THIS MOVIE DOES THE IMPOSSIBLE! And this movie made me really appreciate the whole "real world vs mushroom world" concept in a way I never have before. While I still prefer the idea Mario was born in the Mushroom world I think there's a really good "You Could Wear the Mask" element that comes from him being from the real world. Which is cool! It makes Mario an everyman the same way Spiderman is. Which I like!

And even the characters themselves I think they're all handled super well. Mario being super brave and standing up for himself, but still folding when he's approached by his father. It's interesting, again, something that could never be tackled with a version of Mario in the past. I love how kind Luigi was and how he's cowardly but still has moments of strength. And he's his own person not a Mario clone. And I love how much brotherly love the two genuinely show for each other. It's something you only really get to see in the RPGs and Luigi's Mansion honestly. I love that Princess Peach was still cute and high femme but totally kicked ass and at no point in the movie did they go like "BWAH!? A GIRL DOING BOY THINGS??? HUH?" NO! They just let Peach be a bad ass! I loved it! I loved DK being a showboating super jock type guy who also wants to impress his dad. It's probably not something I ever would've thought to do for DK but it's SO good and it makes such an interesting parallel between Mario and him. I LOVED Mario and DK's rivalry. I wasn't expecting DK to become a main teammate so that was WONDERFUL to see. When they work together in the eel and when they get to the Mushroom Kingdom and when they still bicker and argue I love it it's so cute it's such a good way to interpret this dynamic! And Bowser is done SO well I love how utterly psychotic he is. The way they handle how much he hates Mario without EVER MEETING HIM is so perfectly done! And I love that they don't pull any punches. He's ruthless and cruel like how Bowser is. And they don't waste any time trying to redeem him or make him seem like "oh well he's just a big softie :(" NO, HE'S A MANIPULATIVE FREAK! I'm so glad they actually beat the shit out of him! They make him scary and big and imposing and they take him down! It's SO wonderfully done!

But without a doubt, my favorite part of the movie is the finale. It's straight up amazing. It gives me chills just thinking about it. The whole finale where they end up back in the real world might be one of my favorite Super Mario scenes across the entire franchise. Where Bowser beats the shit out of Mario and sends him running away scared into a pizza parlor. It's scary it's not something you usually see. And when Mario is cowering while Bowser calls him a loser, it's interesting, again you don't usually see this lack of confidence in Mario. He's genuinely bruised and banged up. Like, he has physical damage on him. Not just "OH I'M SHORT NOW!" Damage, but REAL painful injuries you can physically see. Again, this isn't something I'd probably want in a Mario game but for a movie it's daring, it's crazy they were allowed to do it. It's unique. This type of edgy stuff is something I LONG to see in the Mario series in some way and it finally happened. And the whole part where the ad they made at the start plays glitched out and gives Mario the newfound confidence he needs. It's beautiful again it gives me chills. And he gets back up and fights it's so cool. THIS IS THE MARIO I LOVE, AND IT'S JUST SO INTERESTING TO SEE THAT PERSONALITY CHALLENGED! It's a similar reason I love the Sonic movies so far, he's different he's more childish he's not always 100% on his game like in the games. It's cool to see them do these things with these characters. But then, the best part. Is when Luigi takes a stand and saves Mario from Bowser's breath. "As long as we're together, everything will be okay" it's beautiful. I'm actually getting a little emotional writing it up. It's perfect. Mario and Luigi are a TEAM. They are a DUO, I WANT TO SEE THEM WORK TOGETHER TO FIGHT! AND THEY DO! I LOVE WHEN BOWSER TRIES TO KICK THEM AND THEY STAND TALL WHILE THE ROAD BREAKS BEHIND THEM!! SEEING THEM KICK THE SHIT OUT OF THE WHOLE KOOPA TROOP WITH THE STARMAN THEME PLAYING IS GENUINELY BREATHTAKING I LOVE THIS WHOLE FUCKING FINALE! AND SEEING THEM SWING BOWSER AROUND AND THEN STOMP HIM THROUGH THE FLAMES IS SO COOL! IT'S AN AMAZING FINALE THAT'S DONE SO RIGHT WITH SO MANY LITTLE CHARACTER BEATS BETWEEN MARIO AND LUIGI AND EVEN BOWSER JUST SO PERFECTLY I'M UTTERLY BLOWN AWAY BY HOW GOOD THIS FINALE IS!

I just fucking love this movie man. Sure it is a lot of references, it's not perfect, but it's a genuinely good Mario movie. And more than that, I'd go as far as to say it is a genuinely good movie straight up. I don't watch a lot of them, but I've seen enough to say I love this movie as a movie.

Responding to Criticisms

I've seen some criticisms of the movie I'd like to address. Some of these are from friends, so if you see something you said here PLEASE do not take it as an insult! No hard feelings what so ever I just wanna give my two cents! Please understand it is COMPLETELY fine to have not liked this movie, but in the same vein it's totally okay for me to give my peace on what I think about other people's toughts.

For one, a big one, "it's just an hour of Mario references." Yeah? I mean kinda. But a lot of those references are just... World building or the Mario world as it is? Like... Were you mad when the Chaos Emeralds showed up in Sonic 2? That's a reference, but it's a part of the world. In my opinion I think most of the big references are in the background anyway, so it's okay if they're laid on a little thick. Plus, again, a lot of the references are just to how the Mario world would work. Plus there's a TON of original stuff and original interpretation on these concepts.

"Ah it's just a kids movie there's nothing interesting in it" Again I could not agree less. Sure it is a kids movie. But there's still some good themes in it, some fantastic concepts and interpretations on the characters. Some kinda edgy stuff in it. iirc they actually say stuff like "Hell Hound" and Kill and stuff you wouldn't expect from a Mario thing. And again, you see Mario bruised up! THAT'S CRAZY!! DOES NO ONE ELSE THINK THAT'S NUTS!?

"It's probably canon so it's not doing anything interesting" I'm sorry, no. For a fanbase that's so intense on Mario lore and going insane any time Mario isn't some sort of bible lore heavy series. I think people are seriously overlooking fascinating elements and mysteries present in this movie. Such as how do the real world and the mushroom world relate? How are they combined after the first movie? Where does Peach come from? Where did the star come from? What's gonna happen with Bowser going forward? This movie, while following the Mario world closer than say, the Sonic movies. It is absolutely doing its own thing. And I'm sure more and more unique things will come from future sequels. It's an interesting movie in of itself.

"Princess Peach is so bad in it" I don't agree! I don't think she's perfect but again she's a total bad ass while still wearing cute dresses and being high femme like I said. And like I said, they never are like "WOW GIRLS CAN'T DO BOY STUFF HOW SHE DO THAT!?" They just let it happen, they just let Peach be cool. But also it's neat to see her doing princess stuff and they still show her having weakness, I LOVE when Bowser manipulates her by torturing toad (that's such a fucked sentence) because it shows she really cares and she has to make hard choices but she still fights through them! And again, it's not like she's the only competent character. She lived in that world I would hope she's better at it than Mario lmao. But the other characters absolutely hold their own and are just as strong as she is! She's works perfectly.

"Bowser doesn't even know Mario why does he hate him?" That's the idea! I can't find the post now but someone explained it SO well! The whole concept is that he has this idea of Mario built up in his head. Bowser is totally delusional. Peach not loving him has NOTHING to do with Mario and everything to do with Bowser being a psycho! And again in my opinion that is such a good interpretation of the character and even Mario and Bowser's relationship!

"It's not as good as the live action Mario Movie" This is a matter of opinion of course but I gotta be honest. This movie is way better. And I want to make it clear: I LOVE the live action Mario Movie. I liked it before you did. I'm gonna be up my own ass about this one cause I know it's true cause for YEARS y'all were saying it sucked until suddenly it became popular to like it out of nowhere. I ran a President Koopa RP tumblr for a while and had seen the movie multiple times before it became the cool thing everyone liked. And while I still love that movie, I just gotta say as a Mario fan I appreciate how this one handles Mario and Luigi's relationships more and I appreciate the more close to canon look at the world. Live Action Mario is certainly more unique, but doesn't fill me with the same sense of child like wonder that makes me feel like the Mario franchise still has magic worth holding onto even nowadays.

But again, this is all a matter of opinion. You are ABSOLUTELY allowed to not like this movie. That's fine. But similarly, I should be allowed to absolutely gush about how amazing the movie was to me and how much it means to me as a Mario fan who had their whole life changed by this series.

Final Thoughts

Man.

That was a lot. I can't contain myself sometimes. But I'm glad I finally got to at least in some way gush about this movie. Cause I really did love it and writing my thoughts on it really makes me wanna watch it again. So I probably will this weekend as a birthday gift to myself.

I find it a little difficult to be so plainly honest about Mario things I love. For multiple reasons. I think this fanbase is a little poisoned. And I feel like being genuine and enjoying what you like about the series can be kind of met fairly negatively a lot of the times. And again with how teetering-tottering I am with my love of the series lately it can only make it more difficult. So I hope I don't come off as annoying about this movie. But Mario whether I like it or not means a lot to me and I have a lot to say about this movie.

I had a friend tell me I couldn't possibly give a non-biased take on the movie. And maybe that's fair. But honestly I don't think it's entirely fair to write off why I love the movie because of that. I genuinely love this movie, not only as a Mario fan but just as a casual movie watcher. I thought it was good. And yeah maybe I wouldn't like it as much if I wasn't so insane about the series for so long. But I do genuinely hope you can understand after seeing all this why it means so much to me and why I think people are being a little unfair to it. I genuinely think it's being nitpicked too hard. It's a truly incredible Mario experience that I loved.

From the way game mechanics are translated to a living world, to the way characters are reinterpreted, to yeah, even just the little references. I flipped when a small part of the Luigi's Mansion theme played, so what? I like Mario, man. So what!?

So yeah. I'm sure I could say more but I'm getting a little embarrassed. So I think I'll wrap it up now.

===

Thanks for reading, if you somehow actually made it through that whole ramble. You are an absolute hero. I waiting a long time to talk about this (still not as long as I took to talk about Sonic 2 though lmao) but I hope in any small way I could convey why this movie really hit home for me in a way I honestly didn't think it could.

I'm genuinely interested to see where the Mario movies go from here and I'll gladly watch them all. I'll be there day 1 to watch the sequel, the DKC movie, the Luigi's Mansion movie. I don't care if it makes me a sheep you've got me hook line and sinker. I'm so blown away by how well it got the series down and I cannot wait to see where it goes from here.

Thank you again for putting up with my insane ramblings. Please follow me on twitter if you wanna... idk see me be a crazy person more.

That's all from me, go out and watch a movie that really makes you emotional!

#2023 #thoughts

[i-thought-so-ima-say]

You know, I’ve been hearing a lot of people talk about the Mario movie, and how Chris Pratt is a horrible cast choice for the main character of the movie, and while I agree with that sentiment, I really wanna point out some thing.

LONG POST BAR

I’ve seen people compare Chris Pratt to Ben Schwartz and honestly I could see why. Like in my head, I associate the two in the same category. You could easily say that they both play the “generic white guys” trope. It’s even funnier when you consider the fact that they’re both from Parks and Recreation and you could blame that to be the reason why they’re both associated with that title in that regard.

But from my personal opinion, I feel like a difference between Ben Schwartz, and Chris Pratt in this situation is dependent on who they’re being cast for y’know.

with Ben Schwartz-at least for all the characters I’ve seen him play as-they all play the exact same trope. Funny preteen-teenager who’s growing up and does teenager things. I’m talking about Sonic, Leonardo, Dewey, and randy cunningham, and maybe other characters that I might have missed. As far as I’m aware, these are his most popular roles currently, and it shows a theme.

These are characters that he performs well, and does commonly. All these characters have their personalities presented really nicely in their voices. Ben Schwartz is able to give them that same attitude, despite kinda giving them all the same voice. This is exactly where Chris Pratt fails.

Literally, the only reason why his voice works as Emmet Lego movie is because Emmet lego movie is supposed to be generic. He’s supposed to be the common character in the story who just accidentally got protagonist syndrome. It’s literally the main joke of the movie- Not even- a major plot point in the movie. he works well as star lord because his character is supposed to be the generic human of the team, it’s what makes him unique in a world dominated by nonhuman entities. But when you put him as a character, who is more than just the generic human character- it just doesn’t fit right. Especially when Mario already has an established voice, that has been used in almost every single Mario game. This character is already defined. Mario is much more than just a human anymore. Mario is Mario, he’s no longer just a human in a mushroom world. That’s why Chris Pratt does it work as Mario. Yet Ben Schwartz thrives as Sonic The Hedgehog.

Take my opinion with a grain of salt if you’d like. I’m not a voice actor, and I’ve never been in any serious type of profession or class to be able to give a professional explanation, or reason to why the movie is being weighed down by Chris Pratts voice-but as a consumer of media, and somebody who enjoys both the games and movies, as well as other shows featuring characters who have existed for a very long time, I can definitely say that this performance by Chris Pratt needs improvement. It either needs something more or something else.

Thank you for coming to my Tedtalk-

#mario movie #super mario movie #chris pratt #crisp rat #super mario #ben Schwartz

[3rddimension]

Seems that Courtney was a fan of the episode your banner came from as well since she posted a screencap of it to her Instagram too. Her picture, however, is from a moment between her and Spencer. There were other "moments" between them in that episode too, and in other shows filmed around that same time - Beopardy and Agree to Disagree come to mind.

The Agree to Disagree they recorded together was a lot. The way they interacted with each other was awfully intimate and I can't put it to rest. Courtney mentioned her "powerful toothbrush" and Spencer followed with "which I will use". Then there were the physical interactions, Courtney agreeing that he only had one type of underwear ("that's true bestie") while they picked something off his sweatshirt like it was something they do regularly, followed by the infamous "you took a bath last night!" from Spencer. And his apology at the end of the video for not changing his underwear while looking at them with puppy eyes.

I look back at Courtney's vlogs and when they were answering the anonymous questions, one of them was about who she had texted last, and the answer was Spencer - they were talking about tattoos. She also mentioned her type later in the vlog and equated it to Charlie Day, which looks nothing like Shaynne, who is a conventionally attractive dude. During the Star Wars Smash or Pass she mentioned that she wasn't into conventionally attractive guys again, and thay one of the conventionally attractive characters needed a beard and some neck tattoos to be more her type (:

There are so many more moments, and when I look at it all together it feels like Courtney has been soft launching Spencer for the last year plus, not Shayne. I know you have mentioned before that their interactions are more like siblings/close friends, but I am not so sure anymore.

I didn't plan to answer this ask at first but I think you're looking at them the wrong way. I think people's intimacy level is different from person to person and what you saw is also in the different perspective than Courtney and Spencer too. They would look at this and think it's normal for them.

On that Agree to Disagree video. I think it's pretty much normal for them to talk or act like this because Courtney has so many brothers and they're all super close with each other too. You can see it in their day off vlog. Also the picking something off is pretty much her tick. They always do it when they saw some hair on other people in the video.

Also that anon vlog. It's super normal to talk with guy friend all the time and they're pretty much BFF with Spencer. If you think it should be Shayne, why would they message each other if they living at the same place?

About the Smash or Pass one. They always have a crush on Chris Pratt's Starlord. Which Shayne is like the most Starlord coded person like ever. He also have been growing the beard lately too and Courtney even mention it on games livestream that his beard back in 2017 is "super fun".

Also please don't attack this person other anon! I really want this to be a safe space for other opinion too and I hope this anon read this and trying to look at another perspective.

[xx-ingie-xx]

Did you watch the Mario movie? If you did, then what's your opinion of it? So far, the Mario movie is the highest grossing movie both in the United States and globably, breaking a lot of previous records such as making 3x more money than the previous highest grossing video game movie adaptation. With that level of success, it's only a matter of time until Nintendo adapts Zelda into a movie or tv series. That idea excites me because Link will finally be allowed to be more than just a blank slate.

I did see it, and I LOVED it. The movie was such a love letter to the franchise with wonderful attention to detail. I also enjoyed the creative liberties they took to flesh out the characters (especially Peach!). At first I didn't love the idea of Chris Pratt voicing Mario (just because he sounds so different), but even that didn't bother me. Jack Black as Bowser was hilarious. xD I'm so glad it's been a huge success, and I look forward to a sequel.

However... if a Zelda movie was announced, my first reaction would be... apprehension. Zelda is not like Mario, and I feel like a movie would be either amazing or atrocious and nothing in between. The Mario movie had a lovable blend of weirdness and humor, which Illumination does very well. That same approach would not work so well with Zelda, or at least it would not unlock the full potential of Zelda. Also, the movie would probably be very kid friendly, like Mario was, even though most Zelda fans are probably adults or teens. And a kid-friendly Zelda would just be... meh. It could even be downright embarrassing if they leaned too heavily on humor. I don't want R-rated Zelda, but I also don't want PG. I think PG-13 would be the sweet spot, but I don't see that happening.

Despite my many, many reservations about a Zelda movie, a large part of me does want to see it happen. So I'm not opposed to it, I'm just... wary.

[adamwatchesmovies]

The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)

While I didn't enjoy this film, that doesn't mean you won't. No matter what I say, the people involved in this project did it: they actually made a movie. That's something to be applauded. With that established...

The Super Mario Bros. Movie may be the most literal adaptation of a video game I’ve ever seen. I can just picture an emergency meeting at the studio where Matt Fogel told some executive “We have a problem. I’ve written the plot but I’m pretty sure it's only about 45 minutes' worth of movie. Also, the characters are thin and obvious”. The response? “Well then, cram in as many references to the Super Mario movies as you can and keep cramming until you have a product that meets our 92 minute quota. This should also take care of that 'character' problem you've foolishly highlighted”.

Mario (voiced by Chris Pratt) and Luigi (Charlie Day) are “The Super Mario Brothers”; the plumbers Brooklyn calls when the day needs saving. At least that’s what they’d like to be. When Mario and Luigi get sucked into a warp pipe, they land in the middle of an impending war between Bowser (Jack Black), his army of Koopas and the nearby Mushroom Kingdom. Worse, Luigi falls into Bowser's clutches. Desperate to save him, Mario goes to the Mushroom Kingdom’s Princess Peach (Anya Taylor-Joy) for help.

I vividly remember seeing the 1993 Super Mario Bros. Movie for the first time and feeling so disappointed that it looked and felt NOTHING like the games. I hated it and wished it was different. Well, that finger on that monkey’s paw menacingly curled alright. Be careful what you wish for.

Brought to us by Illumination, this is a good-looking movie. I can also praise Jack Black as Bowser, who is clearly having a blast, particularly when his character expresses his love for Peach through song. This is not a musical but the picture makes a great effort to give Bowser some much needed personality and it accomplishes this by giving him a few key eccentricities. Even if you know the incoming tune, it’ll still have you laughing out loud. I wish I had more good things to say. It moves at a fine pace? Kids watching won’t be bored? Sure. Let’s go with that.

For many years, you could count the number of good video game-based films on a single hand. The Super Mario Bros. Movie shows why. I’d wager that Mario is the most recognizable video game character of all time. Nearly every game featuring the Italian-American plumber would still be fun today. What the games do not have, however, is a story. There’s an objective, there are enemies and there’s a distinct visual style. That’s not enough and the source material isn’t an excuse. The Lego Movie proved even a no-story property can make for interesting characters and an intelligent plot with something to say. Super Mario Bros. is closer to Playmobil: The Movie. Not THAT bad, but so much of it feels like a commercial.

The story is so basic and the jokes aren't innovative but that's "ok" because they're slathered with endless references/easter eggs. Some are subtle, like background graphics that reference Jump Man. Others are so painfully in-your-face you groan. It’s not enough for the heroes to race to their destination; they have to be inside the same vehicles players use in Mario Kart, on a rainbow road like you would see in the game. Then the characters at the front of the group have to be taken out by a blue, flying shell. We know it's a blue flying shell because the character who “throws” it tells us it's a blue flying shell. It’s as if Nintendo was scared all of their games would suddenly vanish from existence so they had to write down reminders for themselves of everything featured in all of them.

You might argue those references are what we came here to see. I suppose you're partially right but so much of the film is spent reminding us of why we bought our tickets it forgets to do anything else but the bare minimum. You'll remember you've seen this picture but you won't learn anything new from it about any aspect of the franchise, its fans or creation.

I’m probably being harsher on this film than I should be but here’s the thing. There are so many other, better things you could be doing instead of watching this The Super Mario Bros. Movie. Playing any Mario game, for instance. At least there you’re actively participating and developing your hand-eye-coordination. You’ll probably laugh harder and have more fun too. The Super Mario Bros. Movie is just a way to exploit an already-existing property - and audiences. (Theatrical version on the big screen, May 12, 2023)

#The Super Mario Bros. Movie #movies #films #movie reviews #film reviews #Aaron Horvath #Michael Jelenic #Matthew Fogel #Chris Pratt #Anya Taylor-Joy #Charlie Day #Jack Black #Keegan-Michael Key #Seth Rogen #Fred Armisen #2023 movies #2023 films #animated movies #animated films

[moviewarfare]

A Review of “The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)”

Nintendo has decided to give another attempt after the disastrous 1993 live-action Super Mario Bros movie. Super Mario is a huge part of my childhood, so I was thrilled at the idea of a movie that actually resembles the game. I was a little put off by the not-so-positive critic's review but is their score justified?

Let's get the biggest worry out of the way, Chris Pratt as Mario. He is all right in the role. I think he does a good voice for Mario that works for the whole runtime. Likewise, Charlie Day as Luigi is good as well. The first act of the movie with Mario and Luigi together is incredibly enjoyable. The pacing is great and they do a great job illustrating the strong bonds between the brothers. This is also thanks to the great chemistry between Chris and Charlie. In terms of great voice performance, Keegan-Michael Key as Toad is terrific. We have seen in interviews that he does the high pitch voice without just sound editing tricks. His voice as Toad works perfectly for the film while still having the same energy as Toad in the game. He is only outshined by the best voice performance in the whole film, Jack Black as Bowser. Jack Black gives a voice performance that actually sounds different from his normal voice to the point that you won't be able to tell it is him. His voice was perfect as Bowser's as he gave a menacing tone but a slight goofiness to the performance as well. Charles Martinet (the video game Mario voice) is also here and not just as a cameo which I appreciate as well.

Brian Tyler is the music composer for this film and he does a great job. They incorporated a lot of the great music from the Mario games into the film wonderfully. He sometimes does it subtlety and sometimes uses it fully for big moments but it is done tastefully. The visuals are also great and they did a great job of making the world of Mario look alive. This is definitely one of Illumination's best-looking films. There are also some great, enjoyable action sequences such as the obstacle course that reminds you of the classic games, Mario vs Donkey Kong, the Rainbow Road, and the whole final act. These sequences utilize the elements from the game superbly. On that note, there are so many references and easter eggs to not just Mario but Nintendo in general. There are easter eggs in the sounds, the music, the visuals, and the dialogue and it is just a lot of fun spotting it all. There is no doubt that this movie was created with the fans in mind.

However, I do have some issues with this film. The first is the plot splitting up Mario and Luigi. It was great seeing them interact but the movie hints at some issues in their relationship and the movie could've explored their brotherly relationship. Unfortunately, the plot splits them up and changes it to be about Mario rescuing Luigi which is super generic. It's a shame, as the plot didn't need to be about Mario saving anyone as Bowser was already a looming threat anyway. The plot being straightforward isn't a massive problem though. The issue is that there is no proper character exploration or development in this straightforward plot. Every character remains the same from beginning to end, except for one character but they just change because the plot demands it to. It isn't naturally built up or earned. Peach's character is also just perfect with no flaws which is kind of boring. The pacing is also incredibly fast after the first act. The movie doesn't spend any time letting a scene breathe with our characters. It is always on to the next thing almost instantly. This is jarring as I wanted to see more of the adventures with Mario and Peach but this is just dealt with in a quick montage.

In terms of voice performances, I do have issues with some. Anna Taylor Joy is just phoning it in as Peach. She is just speaking in her normal voice and that is fine just because her normal voice suits the character but I wish she put some effort into it. Seth Rogen as Donkey Kong is another performance where they are just speaking in their normal voice. I don't like the casting of Seth and the film doesn't change my mind. On that note, Fred Armisen as Cranky Kong is another big miscasting. He doesn't sound old enough or cranky enough as the character. There is also a weird creative choice in having 80s song in the film. There is AC/DC Thunderstruck and Take on Me in the film and it is just very off-putting. These songs didn't work for the scene and I'm not sure why they put the songs in a Mario movie. I also didn't find the jokes laugh out loud funny but kids were laughing so it was maybe that the jokes just aren't funny for adults.

Overall, my biggest worry was The Super Mario Bros movie sucking. Fortunately, this movie does not suck and is actually a very fun movie. I do think the critics were a bit harsh but their criticisms are understandable. The movie plays it very safe with the plot and characters. There is not any meaningful message in this film. Nevertheless, the movie succeeds in delivering a fun Mario adventure that is fun for kids while being enjoyable enough for adults. A kid behind me in my theatre called it the 'best movie ever' so clearly it is doing something right! Hopefully, this movie opens the door for more Mario or Nintendo properties getting their own film adaptions. Luigi's Mansion, Metroid, The Legend of Zelda, Star Fox, Kirby! The possibilities are endless!

For more reviews like this visit:

https://moviewarfarereviews.blogspot.com/

#movies #films #Movie Reviews #Film Review #mario #super mario bros #nintendo #the super mario bros movie #the super mario bros film #the super mario bros 2023 #Chris Pratt #jack black #anna taylor joy #marvel #the legend of zelda #metroid