I’ve really been listening to this song every single day in hope for better days. I just keep going for better days where it will be warmer (I’m in the middle of the bad winter blues right now), where I can travel, where I can just go out to eat, days where I am more confident and sure of myself. At the same time, I am cherishing and giving gratitude to the present moment . I’ve learned you can’t become happy, you can’t wait for the day where you will be happy. You have to be happy now, be happy for this moment. The present moment will always pass so look around what is going on now. I am happy I fill my days where I am eating nutritious food and going on daily walks to take care of myself and express love for myself.

*follows one recovery account”

me:

You are so strong and brave. Never doubt that.

I’m proud of you for all the hard work you’ve done

Even if that “hard work” is just getting out of bed

If it was difficult for you, that counts as hard work, and I’m proud of you for the effort you put into it

How are your goals looking? I hope they are smart… time a few minutes and kindly review…

the season of dreamin’ baby ✨🧘🏼‍♀️

Take a deep breath and know that you are far more loved and far more beautiful than you realize

Yesterday we made art, and today we will consume some instead. Curl up with a favorite book or podcast. Tour a museum through their website, or visit one if it is practical and responsible to do so. Play some music and just listen to it.

Thurs. 🌔♉

Twitter : iamsolely

Instagram : solelyangel

today’s affirmation:

i am worthy of care and love!

new year, new update

2021 has started on a good note.

• i have totally given up coffee.

• i have kept up my habit of not smoking.

• i have not drank alcohol in the last 15 days.

• i have stopped taking sedatives.

i am not fighting an addiction to alcohol, i merely want to give up social drinking altogether. when i visit home, my father and i have a ritual of drinking beer together. it is strange and a little sad that we cannot bond unless alcohol is involved. i do not plan to break that practice yet.

i am still drinking two cups of black tea a day. i have also started drinking apple cider vinegar in the mornings because it is rich in antioxidants. i have also restarted multivitamin tablets and immune booster supplements. as a medical professional myself, i have more faith in vinegar than in synthetic vitamins. however, unless i get my COVID-19 vaccine, i am willing to support my immune system in every way possible.

i still fail on two fronts everyday:

• i cannot wake up early in the morning, irrespective of how early i go to bed and how long i sleep.

• i fail to watch my calories and eat more junk than is appropriate.

also, while i do walk whenever possible, i am not getting enough exercise. i am still overweight, which is concerning.

i have not made much progress on emotional front. it is a struggle every single day. i have found that when i focus on the other manageable aspects of my life, i feel better. i do not know how long i can continue like that.

this is all the first 21 days of ‘21 have had for me. let’s see how the rest of the year goes.

happy new year everyone.

learning to be gentle with my heart in this season of my life has been a struggle. learning to love and be love for others has been tiring. learning to let go of things that are making me anxious has been a daunting task. learning to be still and rest has been difficult to say the least.

i keep holding onto trauma, memories, and people that i need to let go of. i keep allowing people to use me for their benefit. i keep giving all of myself to the wrong people. i keep pouring from an empty cup. i keep allowing intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and depression run my life.

i am light, i am love, i am hope to others. i am fragile, i am art, i am a shoulder to cry on. i am resilient, i am strong, i am a good listener.

i will continue to work to make myself a better person. i will accomplish everything i’ve ever wanted to. i will advocate for myself. i will never settle for less than i deserve.