#self control who’s she?

[daily-odile]

everything is the same except Odile is the one looping

oh. heheheheh. muahahahaha. hold on *digs through my pile of disorganized sketches*

Odile loops au; a sketch compilation!!

Some old fic drabbles + associated sketches under cut (a6 secret spoilers):

hc: Since equipment carries over, as long as Odile uses her book in a fight, she can write down notes and have it carry over loops

toxic doomed yuri (for a more fleshed out fic I highly recommend The Sweetest Thing by soreimoon, it's amazing)

#isat #odile loops au #in stars and time #isat spoilers #isat odile #odile timeloop au #isat au #congrats on unleashing the hell gates of odile looping au!!! I've thought about it a bunch!!!!! #contexts: #candy is a reference to sasasap i think. not sure if odile likes candy though #i think it'd be funny if odile struggled with understanding how shields work for a bit. she spends several loops asking mirabelle for help #I think odile would actually spend more time in the loops once she's sure she can just loop again. They're not actually in a rush after all #and she might as well maximize her loops #under cut: #she leaves all of her excess books with loop. Loop has another thing to do while waiting #yes loop is still you know who in this one #toxic doomed yuri is just very self indulgent teehee thanks discord folks #not depicted: I also think that the more loops she does the more she views them as experiments #with variables to control and test #that's where she starts falling off the deep end and start testing stuff like. not warning siffrin about the rock #(instantly regrets it though. loops back the first time she tries) #day 26 today? #A big one! Have funnn #you can tell some of these are really old by the different colored background lmfao

[caelanglang]

chuuya will go insane seeing dazai cry? zamn would pay to see that lmaoo

hi, i kinda went insane thinking and drawing about this one.

a continuation of the drunk fem!dazai post !

mini bonus:

update: now with extra here ~

#girls kissing girls kissing girl being gay aaaaaa #i wanted to draw ugly crying bc tbh crying feels ugly esp when you cant control the tears #yes i went a wee bit insane to finish this I'm sorry it took a while to reply this inbox #this was a very sever brainrot thats for the encouragement anon #severe* #chuuya is weak af when dazai actualy cries and does anything to stop it #dw she did not go insane #she merely flooded the living room but hey it made dazai stop crying so its a w #im the one who went insane finishing this comic i think... #hope you like it! thak you for reading this super self indulget comic #can u tell im so so torn with what hair to give fem chuu? yes. #bsd #skk #inbox #inbox sketch #sketch #my art #my comic #soukoku #fem skk

[dirtytransmasc]

ok but like, Modest!Alicent Hightower au (more modest than she already is) cause I feel like it, it adds ✨layers✨

Alicent who veils her hair during her day to day life, elegant laces and silks adorning her long ginger-brown hair, covering it completely at the Sept.

Alicent who wears dresses with long heavy skirts and always covers her elbows with billowing sleeves.

Alicent who conceals her silhouette with thick shaping garments. they also just helped her back during her pregnancies and taking care of kids (her servants recommended them so she'd have full range of motion and support)

Alicent who was stripped of her modesty, her dignity and sense of security whenever Viserys wanted her. stripped of it by her own father when he sent her to Viserys's chambers in a dress that didn't cover as much as she would have liked, especially when she visited a man with those (silent) instructions.

Alicent who lets her hair down around people she trusts. covering it around Rhaenyra after she abandoned her, a blow to Rhaenyra, a blatant "you hurt me and broke my trust". letting Criston see her hair after he becomes her sworn sword. covering in front of Viserys until he demands she stops. Alicent putting a little makeshift veil on her daughter, who wanted to look like her mum, promising it would protect her from how loud the world was.

Alicent who only trusts her closest servants to dress her, and even then insists on being in a full shift before they can come in.

Alicent who felt stripped bare while giving birth to her children.

little Alicent looking up to her mum who was also very modest, and spending her childhood playing in long skirts.

Alicent who wears shawls and scarves out in public or at events. Criston watches to make sure she remains properly covered. her hands fiddling with the patterns or tassels while she talks to others.

Alicent doing this with her kids:

Criston offering her his cloak when she's put in bad situations like sudden crowds or outings.

wearing flowy but opaque fabrics during the summers, looking ethereal and goddess-like with her layers skirts and sleeves.

the whole Larys situation being even more sickening.

all 3 of her sons being protective of her modesty alongside Criston, always offering their cloaks to her or standing to block her from the wind or wandering eyes. Aegon holding her veil in place when it's windy, Aemond placing a cloak over her in public, Daeron fiercely defending his mum from lusting glances or lingering stares.

Helaena continuing to veil with her mum when they go out, they love matching veils and trying ornate styles.

Alicent fixing her daughters veil in attempts to get it to stay in on dragon back. it doesn't. but they don't mind the extra bonding time none the less.

gold veils that literally make her look like she's dripping in gold.

tucking her babes in her shawls or holding them against her skirts that are practically swallowing them whole.

Alicent collecting layers. Ornate undergarments that cover her arms in gold and embroidered patterns, some almost like tapestries others more simple. undershirts that cover her neck, with "choker" patterns and sewn in jewels. modest nightgowns and robes made of the softest, most breathable fabrics in existence.

covering her face on holy days/days of importance.

I just have so many thoughts.

#based vaguely off of my modest Catholic family #cause modesty is so fucking beautiful and I think we should talk about modest Alicent more cause it has so much potential #I think giving her that kayer of preserving her modesty. showing more to those she trusts. having it robbed from her. the way it involves- #those she loves. its all symbolism and its making me salivate. im chewing my own leg. #plus the etheral almost divine beauty that comes from modesty #(but also intentional and consented immodesty. cause they are two sides of the same coin) #is indescribable #especially when its a choice made by someone for themselves and themselves only #alicent (in my mind) chooses to be modest. she wants to be. she does it for herself as a commitment to herself. her faith. her mother. #she loves her modesty and creates her own rules as to who sees what #ita control #it's self care and love #its beautiful #alicent hightower #pro alicent hightower #queen alicent #alicent my beloved #ser criston cole #criston cole #pro criston cole #vauge #alicole #platonic Alicole #aegon targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #aemond targaryen #helaena targaryen #daeron targaryen #pro team green #modesty

[owari-no-suffering]

shoutout to lan wangji and luo binghe for being endlessly tormented by their love interests' mixed signals, reaching their breaking point, and then proceeding to never be normal about their (always reciprocated) crushes (turned husbands) ever again.

#like obviously binghe and wangji are not on the same level. but they're certainly not opposites! #just got to wangxian's first kiss and like. #if my silly gay crush showered me in flowers and pointed out how pretty i was and always hung around me. #but then was like ''wow i love talking to boys don't you love talking to boys S?" #i would also be driven so insane as to just start punching trees #lan wangji epitome of control being pushed past his breaking point and hating himself for it . . . you are so dear to me #luo binghe driven absolutely batshit bonkers by his shizun who cares deeply for him and fears (or used to fear) the idea of him . . . #mm yes i'm connecting the dots. mxtx has a flavour she likes. i see i see #TBD on whether hualian fits into this nonsense at all but from what i've heard: not really #mdzs #rzfzx #svsss #scum villian self saving system #grandmaster of demonic cultivation #wangxian #bingqiu

[tolerateit]

.

#meg talks #I think swifties love stripping taylor of autonomy sometimes bc every narrative y'all spin about her in light of ttpd/this year is just like #“she was held captive by her abusive dominating ex who didn't allow her to do stuff she wanted to! controlled her music AND personal life” #Y'all know people don't lose their sense of self in a relationship. nobody could have asked her to not make music abt her life #she literally did do that! And recontextualizing those songs due to her personal experiences =/= them being bad to begin with #and this happens every time she's in a new relationship #it's weird how much swifties lowkey WANT her to be miserable and suppressed in a relationship as if it's music fodder or whatever #she's not “finally free!!!” she always has been! People do things differently with different partners lol?

[nightgoodomens]

Damn I wonder who tipped Enty off now… 🙄

#NightGoodOmens talks PR #could it be the control freak who was losing control and wanted the men shoved back in the closet so she can continue self serving #idk idk idk #looks like it blew right in her face #so she’s now not controlling herself and lashing out

[autisticlee]

"just be yourself" has always been one of my most hated things to hear from someone. it may sound simple and easy to you, but when you grew up never able formed a single solid personality (because you grew up autistic or for some other reason) and/or have always felt more like 20 different personalities in a trench coat who fight over who is supposed to be in charge, that "simple" advice is so much less simple.....it can even seem impossible.

#autistic #autism things #autism #actually autistic #neurodivergent #adhd #audhd #dissociative disorder #dissociative identity disorder #did #osdd #not sure what all to tag #disclaimer. not formally diagnosed with did/osdd but currently being evaluated for it because therapist says #i have “concerning levels of dissociation” and feels its negatively impacting my life and these little freaks in my head need controlled #well she didnt say that last part but there needs to be some order in here #anyway. WHO AM I. WHO IS LEE. IS LEE A REAL PERSON. WHO IS THIS SELF YOU SPEAK OF AND HOW DO I BE THAT. IDK. #lee rambles #big imposter syndrome when considering a dissociative brain thing. been super exhausting working on it with therapist. is that normal?

[alexiethymia]

[book spoilers]

Lockwood’s idea of a grand gesture is to be more of a fool than usual, more death-defying than usual, to make sure that Lockwood & Co. was always on front page news because if Lucy was the best then Lockwood & Co. could be nothing less than THE best agency to deserve her, to get her to return. And no, he doesn’t stop there. He may not have asked you to return on bended knee like you wanted Lucy, but like any proper gentleman caller he couldn’t come to your door empty-handed. He brings THE case, that one case that Lucy could never refuse coming from Fittes herself. I bet he spent all those four months searching for that one case. Because see the plan was always for her to return and Lockwood has always been an end-justifies-the-means kind of guy. And the way he gets her on board speaks a lot about his own character and how well he knows Lucy.

Lockwood has always been slightly manipulative and he uses the full force of that skill during that reunion with Lucy. Every move was calculated. From his suit he wears like armor, each one carefully chosen. An old coat that reminds them of a case they worked on together, an immaculate new suit (Really? Just to hire her again?), and to top it all of, a tie which Lucy specifically gave him. He catches her off guard, he doesn’t give her time to get her bearings. He knows asking her outright to return wouldn’t work. Even if he did beg, that already failed when he ended up so angry that he left Lucy behind in that cafe (the fact that Lockwood who prides himself on being a gentleman could leave a girl, and Lucy of all people, shows that his emotions were completely haywire that day). In other words, Lucy’s stubbornness proved stronger than his own. So he had to change tactics. He had to make sure that her returning would be all her idea, that she would return all on her own.

Because see, he didn’t need a case to see her. He could have visited at any time after they didn’t have closure when Lucy snuck away in the dawn to leave. He could have normalized ties between them and remained friends even as Lucy was now a freelance agent. But he didn’t. He made sure they didn’t have closure. He didn’t even acknowledge her leaving because to do otherwise would make it final. On Lucy’s end I think she wouldn’t have minded if they could be friends and talk casually together again. She wanted it. But that’s not what Lockwood wanted. He wouldn’t have been satisfied unless Lucy was back home with them. Like a jilted lover, he needed a grand gesture to draw her back in.

So he does everything. He lies. “I wouldn’t ask you again to return.” “It’s just a one-off.” “One night, two max.” But and even though Lucy couldn’t fully see through him, what they really meant, she did pick up on signs of him fraying and unraveling. The uncertain smile that was simultaneously just for her and was shades paler than his usual gigawatt smile, the slight bitterness that she was willing to work with other agencies but not his, that studied nonchalance as if he wasn’t keeping track of her progress and whereabouts the same way Lucy tried not to follow news of Lockwood and Co., the deflection, deflection, deflection.

He doesn’t answer properly regarding Holly because he still thinks she might have had something to do with Lucy leaving.

“George didn’t like it.” This is his mixing up of I and we tendency again but way worse. For him to use George to say that she was missed was egregious because couldn’t he just say that he missed her? Or even we missed you, we didn’t like it [the idea of replacing you]. It wouldn’t be so strange. He is as much her friend as George. Unless her leaving cut him more deeply. And we know he represses that sh*t. So he doesn’t even include himself in the equation anymore maybe because he thought it would make Lucy uncomfortable because not even him losing control of his emotions, being exposed and raw could get her to stay. Or at least that’s what he tells himself when in reality he’s fortified his barriers once again. He made himself open for Lucy, all the anger he’d kept tightly locked inside, and still - she left. So he can’t even talk to Lucy anymore without using someone or something as a conduit, projecting himself because he can’t expose himself to that sort of vulnerability again until he accomplishes his goal. So yeah there’s plenty of bitterness on his part, but what trumps that, always trumps it and his pride (because I’m sure part of him expected that Lucy would come back earlier on her own so he was just waiting and when that didn’t happen because see in a contest of wills Lucy’s would always trump his own, he’s weak when it comes to her, he’s the one who comes to her instead) - is that base desire for her to just come back.

#lockwood and co #locklyle #lockwood & co #anthony lockwood #lucy carlyle #see this is why I like manipulative characters #but ouch the angst #he was desperate by that point #you can’t tell me he didn’t have a plan a to z #everything is muted from lucy’s perspective because she always downplays everything lockwood does to or in relation to her #except at least she picked up his tendency to be self-sacrificial for her #but of course she turns it around and assumes it’s entirely her fault because she can’t control her emotions #when you know lucy it could be that it’s lockwood who can’t control his emotions #when it comes to you #see this is why I will not survive if there isn’t a second #(and hopefully third and fourth best case scenario four seasons) #because I desperately need to see that cafe conversation from outside lucy’s pov #because if that’s the way she described it #then lockwood must have been livid and entirely heartbroken #which doubles the angst when you consider what they went through this first season #and while he may have been aware of his feelings for lucy this first season #I think he took the stupid stupid route of thinking he wasn’t good enough for her #which is why he sort of stays away during the events of the hollow boy as to not burden her with his feelings #which unfortunately also contributed to lucy feeling that perhaps she did have to leave #when that was the last thing he wanted he never meant or even wanted for her to go #there is so much angst in the hollow boy and the creeping shadown #they already tripled the angst with the first season #if we get the second season focusing on these two books with perhaps a mid season finale at the point where lucy leaves the agency #I will not survive the angst #but I still need it

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

I was rewatching The Stone Forest and I really like to think that Hilda had to pass by the Bell Keeper’s outpost on her way out of the city limits. I like to think that idiot looked at what was happening, shrugged, and said ‘eh, she’s the scariest thing out there’

#“‘the scariest thing out there’?”the girl sends him a look that isn't quite a glare for once; it still conveys her opinion just as clearly #Edmund shrugs. Hilda is still within sight of his binoculars. he watches her run and can’t be sure whether she’s running *towards* or *from #*.He doesn’t think she knows either. #'I mean. it’s not like trolls can harm her at this time of the day. #Don’t tell me you believe in fairies kid.' #And there it is at last: the glare. Meiri looks up from her art project - her new therapist had reccomended it as a way to express herself #and since he'd been helping so much so far she'd decided to grudgingly give it a shot - #“*No*” she states pointedly; to anyone who knew her it was an affirmation. And Edmund knew her better than she cared for #'What I believe in is wolves and recluse spiders and ticks and nettle. And I believe that someone with the spine #to sabotage the Patrol wouldn't have the self control to not lick a pretty mushroom' #“Hey!” Edmund protested putting down his binoculars. “I sabotaged the Patrol! For *you* I might add!” #Meiri's smile turned mean; it was a regular expression for her yet it never conveyed any malice. Just the thrill of a game that never tired #her. “And would you?” she lifted one thick eyebrow; signaling to her dad that it was his move now #The dad in question was unfortunately thinking back to a time in his young teenage years when he figured he could eat anything animals bit #and gave himself a poisoning that had him taken to the ER. But she didn't need to know that. *ever* in fact. #“Obviously I would. Like I'd let a mushroom ruin my perfect sandwich diet” #Meiri groaned loudly. Some games were worth playing. But some wars she'd already accepted she'd never win #“Anyway” he turned back to staring at the outside of the wall as if it was of any interest to him (it wasn't) #“kid'll be fine is my point. And even if she isn't ya know what's the best think about this situation?” #They looked at each other with matching smirks. “none of our flipping business” he said at the same time as she echoed #“None of our fucking business” #He gasped immediatelly. “*Meiri!*” #The chastening was useless. She just shrugged innocently. #He'd really have to limit her library visits #the bell keeper hilda #meirdom #hilda the series #hilda netflix

[obsidian-art04]

Curious Questions

Based on a bit of writing i did last night, kinda, i started the drawing, then wrote it better

#levys art #levy draws #levys oc #fnaf oc #fnaf moon #yes Yvette rambles aboit random facts #shes a self insert and i would ramble aboit said facts #i do not control what facts my brain decides to keep #mer au #fnaf mer au #this was me getting a Moon design down #i really enjoy it but he might be to dark lol #i apologize to anyone who tries to read my handwritting #i have bad handwriting please forgive me #idk how to tag shit im sorry JFIEOFKEK #Yvette North #i forgot to tag her!!!! #a crime!!! smh #fnaf au #ig i can also include that lol

[vulturevanity]

I feel like SV girlies haven't seriously considered "codependent mutually obsessive JuliNemo" yet and that's a shame, really. I've seen a lot of wholesome ChampionRank (really cute but a rehash of every wholesome yuri I've ever seen, not much original content here and that's okay) and one-sided obsessive yandere!Nemona ChampionRank (REALLY do not like the villainization of Nemona's neurodivergence but eh, you can do whatever you want forever) but not as much "these two get on like a house on fire. and boy, it's dry season" ChampionRank.

Where is "battle-hungry socially starved trainwrecks who have no one but each other" JuliNemo. Where is "oh god these two exacerbate each others issues into the stratosphere and this can only end in disaster but I can't look away" JuliNemo. Where is "bringing out the worst in each other and scaring the hoes" JuliNemo. Where is "you two are perfect for each other. Never change, just never involve anyone else in any of this" JuliNemo. There's so much potential here. Toxic codependent yuri save me

#pokémon #pokemon sv #championrankshipping #julinemo #babbles #my juliana is such a mess #she does not make friends easily and can't keep relationships for long at all #whenever someone enters her life she aants to make the best impression so she lovebombs them incessantly #and that either comes across as too much too fast or causes people to get too attached. #but she's young. she is very young. and the people who bothered to match her energy had ulterior motives #so now she's too afraid of getting too close to someone #she'll act the part but never show her true self #and at the slightest hint of genuine connection she'll RUN. #this of course clashes horribly with Nemona's own overbearing personality and loneliness #you know how she wants you to be her ideal rival. and you end up becoming exactly that. #yeah to my Juliana this was kind of a nightmare because. as much as this toed her boundaries #she isn't so inept as to not recognize a bit of herself in Nemona. so she decided to ride this out and appease her #and UH OH! she got attached. fear and need for control and validation from feeling wanted mixed in her head #and she started matching Nemona's energy and the two jumped into dating too fast and oops. they're codependent now #they literally can't handle being away from each other for more than two days or they start going feral #i wish i had the energy to write this one because i'm fascinated by this horrible dynamic. i want to study them in a rat maze #edit: i feel like i should clarify that this interpretation relies on Florian existing and being the one to help Penny and Arven #Florian isn't without his issues. he's a huge people pleaser too. but he's more of a doormat who can't say no

[engagemythrusters]

dogma didn't want to do a portrait but tup and kix made him… and there's only so many flashes he can take before it looks like war.

#this took forever ... hopefully that won't be a recurring thing... #fuck #anyway. MUCH self-doubt and frustration aside. #this is from my No Order 66 AU!! #the massiff is Exo and she's here bc Dogma got reconditioned after Umbara #it didn't stick but... well. reconstructing your brain to nothing will have effects even if you DO remember who you are. #her tasks are DPT and interruption and fetching help when needed #for dissociation/meltdowns/ptsd flashbacks/etc #and also crowd control (give him space sometimes!) and finding Dogma if he wanders off while dissociated #and a few other small things that that follow the same principals #(she can do a bit of retrieval--not really her thing but she was trained a bit in it) #(Dogma keeps wanting to have someone teach her to help w/ tup's seizures but rightfully everyone tells him no. #Tup will get his own service animal if he needs one. and he denies one for now. #dude you had a chip erode part of ur brain and then had experimental surgery that fucked u up but okay. fine. have it ur way!) #anyway she has her longer spikes filed down for safety during DPT. it's completely safe--like cutting fingernails! #OKAY yeah thats it. hopefully some day i'll WRITE this au. xoxo mwuah #saleucami au #clone trooper dogma #dogma #clone trooper tup #tup #clone troopers #exo the service massiff #massiff #star wars: the clone wars #the clone wars #star wars #my art #mimse art

[booksandchainmail]

Hand on the chisel, or Song Ren's rigid, brittle self-control

From Pale Lights book 2

Chapter 2:

Song’s lips thinned, but she held her tongue. You are stone shaped by the chisel of life, she recited. Will it be your hand wielding the tool, or theirs? If she gave her anger to others, she relinquished the chisel – and that was unacceptable.

Chapter 8:

It was one thing to hold a member of her cabal, another to beat them. That would not be tolerated. Hand on the chisel, Song reminded herself, but wrenched open the door harder than necessary.

Chapter 11:

She grit her teeth. To say this was to insult their very contract, since she had asked to – Song smoothed out the thought, the rising anger. He did it, she knew, to get a rise out of her. But she would not fall for it this time. Song had prepared herself, meditated on the matter. Her hand would remain on the chisel.

Chapter 13:

Song could see them creeping across the checkered, cracked floor of the entrance hall. The god was everywhere, blind hands tugging and pulling at the insides of Scholomance like a child at play – moving this and that, just itching to smash it all onto something that would scream. Hand on the chisel, she reminded herself. Fear would do her no good in this place. Fear never helped anywhere.

Chapter 16:

Song, instead, calmly rose and faced as much as the wall as she could. She blinked, once, and breathed out. The sheer number of details was… Hand on the chisel, the Tianxi reminded herself.

Chapter 16:

“Trade on your own time,��� Colonel Cao told the students. “We move on.” Song almost flinched. Hand on the chisel.

Chapter 18:

It smelled burnt. Swallowing thickly, Song looked down and saw that in her fugue she had left the chicken unattended too long. The top was still pink, but when she flipped the cuts she saw they had charred stripes. The Tianxi swallowed. If she cut them out perhaps it wouldn’t show? No, they’ll still see I cut out parts. Perhaps if she sliced every piece in two, then – no, idiot, they would notice the quantity was too small. One of them would ask. They would know. Hands shaking, tearing up like a fucking child, Song did the only rational thing she could: she put the pot off the fire, went outside with a shovel and dug a hole in a corner of the garden. She emptied the burnt chicken into it – she’d have to buy another to replace it from her own funds – and filled the hole. She had to hurry, they could be back anytime now. Song opened the windows to get rid of the smell and cleaned the iron pot before doing the recipe properly this time. When her cabal began arriving one after the other, Song was ready. She welcomed them with a smile and a meal and her hand remained on the chisel as they all sat together and ate. Like a proper brigade, led by a proper captain.

Chapter 21:

And he was right, she realized. It would be their word against his, and though she was confident they would come out ahead in the hearing the incident would be added to her record. She had shot a watchman from behind. Every superior officer she could ever have would know she had crippled someone wearing the black. Who would trust her after that? Who would let her stand behind them? Song had already seen how bad it would be, fighting against the tide, and now mere minutes out of that place she was somehow making it all worse. She had learned nothing, made all that pain and grief pointless. Crack. “-of your life,” the man laughed. “You’re fucked, brat, you-” Her hand slipped. It was not the blow of a duelist or a soldier: her blade hacked into the man’s face like a butcher knife. “You trash,” she snarled, ripping her blade out and hacking down again. “You relic, you-” Song screamed and struck again. And again, and again and again. He had cornered her, ended her career. Only when her arm hurt and her breath was ragged did the silver-eyed girl fall to her knees, choking out a sob, fingers closed around the chisel she had used to make a ruin of the watchman.

#pale lights #song ren #i love her so much #girl who is so so normal and in control of herself goes through a terrible horrible no good very bad week #and has a perfectly rational secret chicken meltdown so she can keep being Normal #and then things Get Worse and it turns out the alternative to self-loathing spirals is brutal knife murder! #(followed by immediately externalizing all of it so she can be normal again) #i want to force her to take a vacation

[fuzzbuns]

Arlecchino discourse is really awkward because both sides are so convinced they are right and that the other side just lacks media literacy but 9 times out of 10 the take in question is also wrong and it leaves me scratching my head a little bit….

#fuzzy rambles #like either they are like ‘no she is bad and doesnt care for the kids at all’ or its ‘she is good actually and does care for the kids’ #and for me its like… damn…. its actually a little more complicated than that but ok ig #saw someone say she doesnt care for freminet or lynette she just uses them as pawns for lyney to be her heir #which is so incorrect on almost every level #it’s basically a self report that they dont know freminet or lynettes relationship with arlecchino #like i think we can agree raising child solider is problematic or whatever while not painting everything she does as master manipulation #like the things ppl claim are just her 5000 level iq manipulation… rolling my eyes it doesnt even make sense #but at the same time she obviously isnt a saint who has everyones best interests in mind because they are still childe soliders #even tho things got better when she took control there is still a lot of cultish and cruel behaviors the kids get drilled into them #tho honestly the whole fatui is like that look at any of the recurits who arent from the orphanage and they are equally brainwashed #if not us than who or whatever (girl who thinks about what happened in the chasm and want to eat drywall) #idk. dont yall have parents? like u can love and care for a child and still suck as a parent #you can try to not become ur abusive mother and still turn into a monster of sorts #ignore the childe instead of child its literally muscle memory how embarrassing

[henrysglock]

S4 Victims: Story by Proxy?

Okay so. In spitballing with Em...something stuck in my head.

So we all know how serial killers leave crumbs because deep down they want to be caught/want the truth to be revealed? Well what if the Duffers, or even current Henry, are doing the same thing. That is, leaving breadcrumbs.

This mainly has to do with the S4 victims, their stories, and the order in which they're chosen.

So, it goes like this:

Chrissy: Abusive mother who resembles Virginia

Fred: Eaten alive by the guilt of being responsible for the accidental death of an innocent.

Max: Suicidal over guilt about Billy's death and her response to it. Billy, who died saving her/while she was saving herself from the Fleshflayer, a regenerated form of the Mindflayer.

Patrick: Abusive father, not much else told.

Max (again): Suicidal Ideation, dies, soul taken, but was revived by El. She's now in some limbo-state, where her body lives but her identity/mind is elsewhere. She will likely be brought back entirely by El in S5.

It almost feels like a story by proxy if we piece it together.

So, let's piece it together:

Person with an abusive mother...feels responsible for the death of an innocent...a sibling who was killed while this person was trying to save themselves from a monster which came from Hawkins lab, which leaves them suicidal...and this person lives in a situation with an abusive father figure. This person becomes suicidal, and their suicide attempt was not entirely successful. They were revived by El, and end up in a limbo state. They may or may not be brought back by El later.

Now, let's collect details about our serial killer:

Abusive mother? Check. (No matter how we frame it, Virginia was not a good mother.)

Innocent died? Check. (Henry has nothing bad to say about Alice, which we know he would if she were not innocent, since he does this with every other victim.)

Sibling died as a result of saving oneself? Check. (The Creel massacre was a situation where Henry was, with whatever intentions we may assign for the other family members' deaths, trying to save himself from Virginia and by extension the lab.)

Ended up with an abusive father figure? Check. (Well...an abusive Papa, one might say.)

Brought back by El multiple times? Check. (El was the one who took Soteria out and brought Henry back from being powerless. El was the one who put Henry in the UD/limbo state. El was the one who opened the gate for his return to the RSU.)

IT ALL ALIGNS. So let's put it together with all the feelings involved:

Citations (I guess? Explanations?) are in the tags listed by number!

Henry had an abusive mother who was at least trying to have him shipped off to the lab, if not actually trying to kill him outright. This situation builds and builds, him wanting to be left alone (1), putting out subconscious and conscious cries for help (2), and her targeting him about it, until March 25th, 1959.

Virginia starts it, attacks, and this time she's out for blood (3). Henry defends himself (4). Virginia, being the parent with powers (5), doesn't actually die (6). Victor, Alice, and Henry go for the door (7). Virginia's on the stairs (8). She's got to finish what she started, since her original plan was botched (9). Henry puts his energy into trancing Victor (10), protecting him from Virginia, since logically two people can't occupy one person's mind.

This leaves good, innocent Alice to fend for herself, standing directly in front of the staircase. She's a loose end (11). Virginia kills her, but can't kill Henry or Victor while the trance is occurring. She figures Henry's going to run himself into the ground (12). She figures she can call Brenner in to collect Henry, like they planned (13). If she disappears, she figures it'll go into the news something like this:

"World War II veteran kills entire family in deranged fit of insanity. Wife missing, presumed dead. Son dies in hospital."

And on both counts, she's essentially right. It does basically go into the papers that way. Victor is taken in for murder, and Henry is taken by Brenner, but not before he sees that Alice was caught in the crossfire (14).

Henry ends up with Brenner, the abusive Papa. He's got the guilt about Alice's death, something that makes him sad and angry. Brenner, maybe, decides to push this in order to increase Henry's powers, but it backfires. Henry's powers increase, but he does...something. He lashes out, he snaps, maybe he even tries to kill himself. He's Brenner's prized pet, though, so Brenner can't let that happen. He seals Henry's powers away with Soteria. It's a death for Henry's entire identity, so far as to have him under the name Peter Ballard. Then comes along 011. She removes Soteria from Peter Ballard...and revives Henry Creel. She then exiles him to the Upside Down in 1979, only to eventually bring him back in 1983 when she opens the Mothergate.

All this to say: It could be his own story, told through the stories of his victims.

Breadcrumbs, or maybe...obvious things, which nobody by any chance ever observes.

Below the cut is where I speculate into motivations for his actions after Soteria's removal, so...not required reading for this particular analysis.

Years of MKUltra torture warp Henry's guilt about the situation into a bastardized, violent, brutal, unethical savior complex based in the notion that he's a predator by nature, but a predator for good. He "saves" the lab kids from a future like his own, filled with nothing but torture. He "saves" El from her ignorance about the lab and intended to have her join him, thereby attempting to "save" her, technically his little sister, from the lab entirely.

He "saves" his s4 victims from their guilt and suffering, which so closely mirror his own, which no one saved him from. I could even go so far as to say he was "saving" Will, who is set up to be so much like him, from a world of horrible people who (from Henry's viewpoint based on his lived experiences) would only serve to abuse and betray him.

This of course isn't to say any of it is right. None of it is right or good...but it makes sense. It follows a pattern. It coheres. The math...maths.

#Citations! #1: Henry often hides alone in the attic. #2: Victor's burning cradle vison (a child in need of help). The drawing of the Shadow Monster. Possibly Alice's nightmares. #2 (cont.): Can all be interpreted as calls for help. Children in distress act out and make disturbing art in hope of conveying that need. #3: Virginia may or may not have been trying to kill Henry but based on the Fleshflayer parallel re: sibling death...it's probable. #4: Henry himself describes that night as self defense/being forced to act. #5: Virginia likely had powers given that Henry has powers #6: Her powers are likely similar to Henry's and Henry has regenerative powers. There are also fishy scenes of her death which imply #6 (cont.): that she may have still been alive. These include: shots from her POV. The fact that her eyes are bloody-- #6 (cont.): but still intact in some shots. The unexplained POV from the top of the stairs. #7: Henry looks very nervous and fidgety at the door like he's antsy to leave with Alice and Victor #8: Again the unexplained POV on the stairs...stairs she earlier runs down after Henry gives her her mirror moment in the bathroom. #9: Henry was successful in disabling her initially which exposed her culpability. #10: Henry puts *so* much time into Victor in canon with basically no explanation why. #11: Alice seems to be a smart and upstanding girl. She might not be controllable re: Virginia being alive/the whole scheme with Brenner. #11 (cont.): The only way to eliminate that risk is to kill her...and we've already seen that Virginia is not good to at least one child. #12: If Virginia has powers like Henry's she likely has a sense of how long someone can be tranced before the trancer runs out of energy. #13: Who called Brenner to come get Henry during his coma? How did Henry end up in Brenner's hands specifically? #14: amerion-main's recent post re: Henry's position change in the foyer shots #End Citations! #This is all very much speculation when it comes to the actual path of events re: the Creel Massacre #but we can all agree that we don't have the full story about the Creels yet...so who knows. #henry/vecna/001 #henry creel analysis #henry creel #virginia creel #creel family #stranger things #stranger things analysis

[blazingblorbos]

Oh I'm deeply in love with her

Chiori Character Teaser just dropped

#I love a woman who's more than happy to beat up a bastard #we love a woman who stands up for her employees #ohhhh she hates men /hj #ohhhhhhhhh the way she glares at him (not so subtly) #what an icon #Chiori #Genshin Chiori #Genhin Impact Chiori #I actually fell for Chiori veryyy quickly in 4.3 #I'm so SO happy she's releasing now #but alas... #I am fearful. for the #HORROR! that is to be the character after her #I have no confirmations. only an unfortunately spoiling twitter trending tab and obvious hunches #I WILL pull for Chiori but. with incredible amounts of self control #and of course the Chevreuse moment that happens right after will NOT go unmentioned #but I gotta employ SOME amount of self-control here