#self-compassion

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

#healing #journey #growth #progress #patience #self-compassion #innerstrength #resilience #emotionalwellbeing

[akindplace]

it’s okay if getting better is taking longer than you hoped to. if getting better doesn’t mean getting cured. if somedays are better than others. if others seem to heal faster. if it’s exhausting. if your illness is chronic and progressive. it doesn’t mean people won’t love you as you are, it doesn’t mean you don’t deserve help, it doesn’t mean that you can’t ever be happy. you still deserve care, love and kindness when you’re suffering, and i hope you find it within yourself to feel compassion towards your own body, even if some people might not, even if it doesn’t work in the way you wished it would, even if it’s different.

#there is still hope even if things might seem hopeless so please take care of yourself #self-acceptance #self-worth #self-care #on hope #on being human #on being chronically ill #chronic illness #disability #original writing #self-compassion

[justabunchofquotesfromallover]

"In addition to the process of mourning and self-forgiveness, another aspect of self-compassion I emphasize is in the energy that's behind whatever action we take. When I advise, "Don't do anything that isn't play!" some take me to be radical, even insane. I earnestly believe, however, that an important form of self-compassion is to make choices motivated purely by our desire to contribute to life rather than out of fear, guilt, shame, duty, or obligation. When we are conscious of the life-enriching purpose behind an action we take, when the sole energy that motivates us is simply to make life wonderful for others and ourselves, then even hard work has an element of play in it. Correspondingly, an otherwise joyful activity performed out of obligation, duty, fear, guilt, or shame will lose its joy and eventually engender resistance."

--Marshall B. Rosenberg, PhD, "Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life"

#nonviolent communication #communication #quotes #bibliotherapy #psychology #self-compassion #healing #recovery #mental health

[watercolourcritters]

always, always

(a little collage piece from last week, thinking about what i want to bring into spring. may we all bring a little kindness for ourselves into the new season)

[ID copied from alt text: a collage that shows a hand holding flowers with text reading "may I be kind to myself." The hand is drawn in pen, while the flowers are pressed/dried purple flowers and greenery. The background is a simple pencil crayon gradation of blue, green, and yellow. The artwork has a gentle feel. It is shown still in a journal that is held by my hand. End ID.]

Instagram | Etsy | Tip Jar

#art #accessible art #watercolour critters art #other work wednesdays #except thursday #but u know what i mean #encouragement #kindness #self-compassion

[creature-wizard]

If people being "cringy" on the Internet fills you with disgust and/or panic, it's time to sit down and unpack your own internalized shame and start practicing self-compassion.

#ending the cycle of trauma begins with you #cringe #shame #internalized shame #self-compassion

[vizthedatum]

Accept that you will disappoint people.

radically self-forgive yourself so that guilt and shame don't become a part of your wiring

so that you can show up and be accountable

#radical self-forgiveness #forgive #shadow work #healing #inner work #trauma #neurodivergence #queer #self love #harm #prose #love #relational love #self-compassion #accountability #growth #honesty #emotional healing #we all make mistakes #grow from your mistakes #ptsd #c-ptsd #masking #people-pleasing #codependency

[morallyinept]

Hey, D. How are you doing buddy?

I see. Feeling a bit down in the dumps, huh?

Well, I've got just the thing for you, handsome...

No... it's not that, D. 🙄

No, this week we're going to have a look at how you can show yourself some self-compassion. Something that is better than, uh... that.

What? Showing yourself some self-compassion is a great thing to do. Well, yes, so is that... okay.

Yes. You've made your point. Okay fine. Jeez... Take your pants off... 🥲

Hold tight, it's Self-Care With Dieter & Jett time!

So, D, have you ever lost your temper at… yourself?

Blamed and then beat yourself up a little inside for doing something you regret, even if in the grand scheme of things, it was something relatively small?

And how did you cope with that afterwards, D?

Hmm. Probably wasn't the wisest idea, was it?

Nah. Didn't think so. Clean up this time, okay? 🤨

It’s easy to be tough on yourself when things go wrong or you feel stressed - and spend hours kissing the bottom of the toilet, too - we tend to do it to ourselves a lot, much more than we actually realize.

But what if there's a better way? 🤔

In the heat of the moment, or during a crisis, no matter how big or small, it's easy to self sabotage. Convince ourselves we're the problem, or even caused a problem to exist. That we're stupid, not talented, or just not worth having around.

And none of that is true, my friends.

Our inner critic has its best intentions for us – maybe it wants us to be safe, to contribute, to succeed, to belong. 

Granted, the good intention is often, heavily veiled under a belittling tone. When you think back to a moment where you were especially hard on yourself, can you conjure up the message you heard? What was the tone? If you could give your inner critic a physical face, what would it look like?

When we forgive ourselves, accept our perceived flaws, and show ourselves some much needed kindness, we practice self-compassion.

Having self-compassion means being able to relate to yourself in a way that’s forgiving, accepting, and loving when situations might be fraught, worrisome or stressful.

If you ever judge or criticize yourself for no justifiable reason, you might find some of the below techniques helpful in showing yourself some kindness and self-compassion.

Treat Yourself As You’d Treat A Friend

One good place to start is by thinking about how you would treat others that you care about. Think about how you'd offer support to a friend who is feeling down or upset.

You'd comfort them, right? Offer them some assuring words, maybe even a hug?

You wouldn't kick them when they're down-

D!! That's not helpful! 🤨

No. Don't argue with me. You'll lose, bud. 😎

Whilst we can’t always take away other people's pain, we can validate it and provide support to help them get through it.

The same can be said for yourself.

Validate your feelings and accept that it's okay to feel like this. Give yourself a reassuring word or two, take a few deep breaths, and wrap your arms around yourself figuratively, and literally. A self-hug can be very healing and reassuring.

Understand Your Reactions

Think about how you would react in a situation when someone else does it. For example, your friend doesn't call when they say they will. You don't get mad, or fly off the hook, right?

Or maybe you do... Sorry, D. I just forgot. 😬

No, I didn't go out to the movies with Ezra. That was last week... Oops.

We had a great time, FYI... 😏

There could be a valid reason why they can't call. Perhaps there's an emergency, or a situation beyond their control? You won't instantly assume they're a bad person, so why are you doing that to yourself?

Ground yourself in the moment and rationalise. You are not a bad person.

Learn From Your Mistakes

When something inevitably goes wrong, we focus too much on the negative. Too much on the uh-oh factor. Meaning we always look at the negatives in a situation and how it impacts us negatively.

Making mistakes is what makes us human. Learning from them is what makes us grow. If we never made mistakes, we wouldn't have life-experience.

Try not to judge yourself too quickly.

Think about what you have learnt from the experience and what you can take away from it, rather than focusing on the negatives. Look for the positives. How can you better equip yourself so next time it happens (if it happens again) you can be prepared? What lesson have you taken away from it?

Take a deep breath and move on. It's in the past now. You can only move forward.

Get Some Perspective

When something bad happens, it always feels like the end of the world, doesn't it? That no-one could relate or possibly be going through what we're experiencing.

And to some degree, that is true. Your crisis is different from another's and affects you differently. But reminding yourself that things aren't all completely doom and gloom can help.

Personally, when I feel down, I try to remember that I'm healthy, that I have friends, I am creative, I have a roof over my head, etc... making a list of all the positives things - even if it's a mental list, and even if they are small things - in your life, can help you regain some perspective away from the negative and help to ground you again.

Reach Out To Others

A problem shared, is a problem halved, right, D?

Uh, D? Honestly, I cannot take you anywhere... 😒

When we talk with others, friends, family, colleagues or even someone professional if we need it, we realize that we’re not alone in feeling pain.

That we are not the only one's gong through it and this can help us gain perspective.

You are not alone.

It’s an important part of reaffirming our sense of being connected, reframing the ‘bigger picture’, and building a social support network that is invaluable to our wellbeing and growth.

Reach out when things go wrong and ask for advice. Ask for feedback too.

Perhaps someone else's perspective of the situation might convince you, and offer validation, that actually, you handled it pretty well and shouldn't be so hard on yourself.

Ditch The Guilt

Self-care is just as important as caring for others. Some would even argue it's more important.

Think about this; how can you expect to give adequate care to someone else, if you don't care for yourself first?

I know, thought provoking, isn't it, D? 💡

Research shows that people who practice self-compassion are found to be more caring, more affectionate and considerate according to their partners, resulting in more romantic relationships; have more acceptance of their own partner's imperfections, and are more likely to compromise when there is conflict.

So you can see why showing yourself some kindness and self-compassion can spread positively into your personal relationships in your life too.

Self-compassion has also been found as key in the fight for injustices, such as equality; including sexual, racial and disability. This is because self-compassion strengthens our personal accountability, and in turn we're more receptive to showing compassion to others.

Self compassion allows us to be more emotionally resilient in times of success and adversity. It helps us assess situations more objectively and supports us in making sound decisions that we won't regret or worry about later.

So, when was the last time you showed yourself some self-compassion, D?

No. That, is not showing self-compassion... No I don't need a lesson.

Put that away... I-

Oh, Dieter... 🤤

Wait, where did you learn moves like that?!

Alexa. Play "We Got The Moves" by Electric Callboy... 😏

Dieter and I hope we helped enlighten you on how to show yourself some self-compassion this week. Remember, be kind to yourself, always.

Until next time, stay kind & stay creamy. 🖤

YOU. ARE. STRONGER. THAN. YOU. THINK. 🖤

Do you. Then do Dieter.

More Dieter & Jett love here

ℹ️ Dieter and I always strive to bring you unbiased, fact-checked advice. We're not licensed therapists, so we do a lot of research to ensure we can provide helpful and informative posts. Well, I do. Dieter mostly sits around eating KitKats.

#self care with dieter and jett #dieter bravo #ezra prospect #dieter bravo the bubble #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #jett's pedro boys #you are stronger than you think #do you #then do dieter #self-compassion #be kind #positivity

[eaudelune]

The word encourage comes from the Old French “to take heart,” and with self-compassion we take heart as we guide ourselves on the path of growth and change. Rather than threatening to punish ourselves if we don’t achieve our goals, we’re kind and supportive, affirming our inherent potential.

Kristin Neff, Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive

#Kristin Neff #word #encouragement #self-compassion

[whilereadingandwalking]

I recently signed up to start getting a massage once a month. I've always seen massages as a form of luxury, something you only do on vacations. But with my fibromyalgia, which is all about the body holding misplaced pain and tension, the massage I had in Argentina literally made me feel so much better, and I started wondering why I wasn't doing it more. Instead of retail therapy, what if I invested in a monthly massage?

Yesterday I went to my first one, and when I left, I could feel myself in my body. But for the first time in a long time, it wasn't a bad thing. I had forgotten what it felt like to be aware that I occupied my body, aware of my body, in a way that wasn't negative. Since my pericarditis diagnosis, my body has most often been something that I either am actively battling or doing things in spite of. It has been a source of frustration, tension, pain, stiffness. But after the massage, I could feel my body, and I felt like we were working together.

For the first time in a long time, I realized, I was investing in my body in a way that wasn't just symptom mitigation but proactive pampering. And I was rewarded with a glimpse of what it was once like to occupy a body that was just there, part of me, working alongside of me, instead of preoccupied with its own battles. I'm proud of myself for taking this step, and also just very hopeful that this alongside medication can do real work against my fibromyalgia.

#self-compassion #self growth #self care #chronically ill #chronic illness #fibromyalgia

[unwelcome-ozian]

#trauma recovery #abuse recovery #shame #empathy #self-compassion #self-acceptance #healing shame

[free--therapy]

#self-compassion #self compassion #compassion #self-kindness #self kindness #self love #self care #mental health #mental wellness #socialwork.career

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

#forgiveness #self-compassion #self-love #self-acceptance #personal growth #healing #moving on #letting go #new beginnings #fresh starts #personal development #self-improvement

[akindplace]

I was once talking to my therapist about my dog and I said "she looks at me like I am the best person in the world" and my therapist said "maybe you should look at yourself like that too". That was months ago, and it stuck with me, because whenever my dogs look at me with so much love in their eyes, I can't help but to think that I can look at myself with love and kindness too and maybe it's not that hard to do so.

#self-acceptance #self-love #self-worth #dogs #my dogs #my babies #positivity #self-compassion #original writing #healing

[wearegoodenough]

Being ‘fat’ is not a character flaw.  Being ‘fat’ is not a reflection of who we are as whole beings.  Humans evolved the ability to carry extra weight for a reason.  Overvaluing ‘thinness’ is a reflection of culture.  People are ‘unhealthy’ in many ways, but people pick and choose what kinds of unhealthiness they deem worthy of ridicule over others which reveals the subjectivity in shaming ‘fat’ people for their bodies. 

I and others must keep dismantling fatphobia both within ourselves and each other to prevent more suffering in the world.  I apologize to anyone I ever made to feel less than and less worthy over something that has so much more to do with socioeconomic factors and other factors outside one’s control like stress, lack of access, lack of time, trauma and psychological manipulation by greedy, sick, food corporations than one being a bad person.  We all deserve love, compassion, support and kindness and if there was more of these things in the world, it would be a much better place for us all. 

#Fatphobia #Fat Acceptance #Self-Love #Self-Compassion #Being Fat Is Not A Character Flaw And People Don't Deserve To Be Treated Less Than Over One Attribute Of Who They Are #Fat Shaming

[creature-wizard]

Dunno who needs to hear it, but it's okay to feel upset over things that don't personally affect you. I see a lot of people say things like, "someone I know about was in a car accident and ended up in the hospital - I don't know why I'm so upset, it doesn't affect me in any way-" Or "someone I know was harassed for belonging to [marginalized group] - I don't know why I'm so upset, I'm not even part of their group, this doesn't affect me in any way-" Now wait a second. Hold up. Since when are we supposed to be apathetic about other people's suffering? Since when are we supposed to just not care about pain, injustice, and cruelty simply because it doesn't concern us personally? Since when is that the way things are supposed to work? Y'all remember that poem? "First they came for X, but I didn't do anything because I'm not one of X"? It's normal and healthy to feel upset over other people's suffering. That's what being part of a community and caring about putting things right is all about. Don't let anyone shame you for giving a damn about someone else's welfare. Don't let anyone tell you that focusing solely on your own welfare is normal or healthy, because it isn't.

#compassion #self-compassion #psa #feelings #emotions

[wisterianwoman]

How to Regulate Your Nervous System for a Balanced Life

#Regulating nervous system #Transformative power #Mental health #Nervous system balance #Emotional well-being #Self-awareness #Stress management #Anxiety relief #Emotional regulation #Mind-body connection #Holistic healing #Self-compassion #Mindfulness practice #Physical relaxation #Emotional healing #Social support #Healthy lifestyle #Coping strategies #Inner peace #Self-care #Wellness tips #Emotional balance #Healing journey #Coping mechanisms #Self-discovery #Relaxation techniques #Mindful living #Stress reduction #Emotional health #Self-improvement