#seriously i’m sorry Taliesin

[wellthebardsdead]

Clockwork heart pt34

Part 33 here

———

Nerevar: *looking down from his horse at Wyrm as the younger elf happily walks along side the horses with their newest companion* Wyrm youre going to get worn out. Riftens a full days travel from here.

Wyrm: *smiles up at him* I’ll be fine ata neht! I don’t want Lucien to be left behind.

Lucien: *the newest addition to the group after befriending Wyrm in the dead man’s drink* Oh it’s no trouble really! I can just- jog along side.

Inigo: no offence julien but you look like the sort to get winded tying your shoes.

Lucien: and you look like the sort to carry fleas. Indigo.

Inigo: hehehehehe~ I like you!

Lucien: the feelings much the same for me. But seriously my friend don’t- AWWW A PUPPY!!!

Wyrm: huh- *turns in time to see a large dog running directly for him, his entire body freezing in utter fear watching the strangely red eyed creature bound towards him* n-no-

Taliesin: *suddenly yanks Wyrm up by his robes and onto naomis saddle with him only for the dog to reach up putting his paws on the horse* DOWN! BAD DOG! GET AWAY FROM HI-

The dog: *ignores Taliesin and bites onto Wyrms boot tugging at it* you are just what I’ve been looking f-… Sotha Sil?

Taliesin: did… did this mutt just talk?

Kaidan: never focking mind that how does it know his name?!

Nerevar: *gets off his horse, hand on his blade as he stares down the hound* Hello, Barbas.

Barbas: … *slowly turns his head to face the Gahmerdohn and Hortator* Oh… Boy, you sure look different.

Wyrm: *simply faints, his crippling fear of dogs getting the better of him*

Taliesin: WYRM?!

Voryn: HLA KHES!? (Little gem)

*several hours later*

Wyrm: *staring at the pile of cheese he’d turned a vampire into as he reluctantly helps Barbas find his master* whew this things got all sorts of weird features- Noooo get away! *whimpers backing up against the icy wall of the cave as barbas approaches sniffing at him*

Barbas: *sniffs his robes and skin ignoring the wabbajack in the dunmers hands* So if you’re not sotha sil, then you’re his reincarnation? Huh he must’ve really been running low on power when he put you together.

Wyrm: I-I don’t know why he made m-me o-or why he made me like this n-now get back! I mean it! I-I’ll turn you into a chicken!

Barbas: Does this form really scare you that badly? Aren’t you supposed to be the dragonborn?

Wyrm: I-I can’t help my fear of- *goes quiet watching the daedra shift and warp his appearance before suddenly looming over him as a red eyed, antlered high elf* dogs-

Barbas: *leans down smirking* How can you defeat the dragons when you’re afraid of a little puppy do- GAHH-

Nerevar: *grabs him roughly by his ear yanking him back and holding his head close to his so only he can hear* I’m being lenient with you because your master and lady Mephala are still on good terms but know this now. I do not care what transpired between you and sotha sil, if you keep frightening Wyrm when he’s so generously agreed to help you. I will hand feed you to Boethia myself.

Barbas: *looking visibly intimidated and failing miserably at hiding it* okay okay I’m sorry! I’ll behave.

Nerevar: *lets him go* good.

Taliesin: *walks in followed by inigo & kaidan* all clear, the last of the vampires have been killed- who in oblivion are you?

Nerevar: Barbas.

Barbas: Nerevar?

Taliesin: Barbas?

Barbas: Taliesin?

Taliesin: Wyrm?

Wyrm: Taliesin-

Inigo: INIGO!

Kaidan: *face palms*

???: “Wyrm? What an odd name… hm. Fitting I suppose if the power I sense from him is what I think it is.”

Wyrm: *blinks and walks to taliesins side, gripping onto him nervously for a moment before following the voice into the main chamber, the others tailing close behind*

Voryn: *standing before a large statue of clavicus vile, staring up at him with an indifferent expression* You harbour no ill will to him then?…

Clavicus Vile: Why would I? He’s not Sotha Sil. And he helped me fulfil my followers last wish~

Voryn: he did? How?

Clavicus Vile: They begged me for a cure for their vampirism. And you came through and killed them all! I couldn’t have planned it better myself!

Wyrm: how awful…

Voryn: *looks up at the stairs leading down to him* Wyrm, to me. *holds out his hand reassuringly, showing no fear before the daedra*

Wyrm: *steps forward hesitating still despite voryns comforting presence*

Barbas: *walks by him patting his shoulder* don’t worry just let me handle this, you helped me, now I help you.

Wyrm: *looks up at him before looking back as Taliesin takes him around the waist, cooing softly to him to let him know it’s okay* teacup…

Taliesin: shhh, You’re safe, I’m here… *smiles reassuringly, masking the concern and uncertainty behind his eyes*

Wyrm: *shakily grips onto his robes and nods, walking down the ramp with him and standing beside voryn at the statue* u-um- hello? C-can you take your- friend? Back now please?

Clavicus Vile: Hmph! That insufferable pup?! No way! No deal-

Wyrm: p-please?

Nerevar: *steps forward to intervene* Wyrm you shouldnt say that it’ll sound like you’re beg-

Voryn: shhh. *looks back at nerevar then at wyrm with a reassuring smile*

Clavicus Vile: *silent for a moment, the air around his statue still for a brief second before suddenly shifting and warping into an explosion of fire and sparks as the stone gives way to the prince himself, staring down at them in all his glory* Hm… *reaches down slowly, offering his hand to the dunmer*

Wyrm: *climbs on without a hint of fear, ignoring how everyone steps forward with panic evident on their faces as the prince of wishes lifts him up to be eye level with him*

Clavicus Vile: After the court of bedlam incident, Id expected old sil to have transferred his hatred of the daedra into you. His caution at least but- you are a strange little thing aren’t you?…

Wyrm: you know about sotha sil? Can you tell me what he was like?

Clavicus Vile: *grins suddenly seeing a bargain to be made* Of course, but you have to do something for me in return~ just tell me your wish and I’ll make it happen.

Wyrm: okay.

Nerevar: Wyrm don’t!!

Voryn: *now showing visible concern* little scrib hold on a moment-

Wyrm: I wish to know why I was made.

Clavicus Vile: *smirks thinking he’s got him where he wants him* of course~ just let me- *reaches his other hand up to touch his head, to see into his mind and grasp his soul and find the tethers that made him. Only to be met with an agony only paralleled by that of umbra as the force of the clockwork god pushes him back out, nearly splitting him in two a second time* UGHHHH!!! *staggers back, dropping wyrm as he grabs his head in pain*

Wyrm: *screams and flails in a panic as he plummets to the ground*

Taliesin: *dives and catches him, shielding his fall with his body as he hits the ground with a thud* Oof! Ughh- *sighs holding wyrm tight* shhh I’ve got you-

Clavicus Vile: AARGHHH YOU HORRIBLE LITTLE-

Taliesin: *gets up holding Wyrm tight* Watch your tongue!! Don’t you dare insult him you horrid beast!

Clavicus Vile: Him? *pauses realising he thinks he’s talking about wyrm* no not him… Sotha Sil, he- stopped me?… but how?

Barbas: Master?

Clavicus Vile: *looks at him perplexed, the two seemingly sharing a conversation only they can hear* … *turns his gaze back to Wyrm* I- can’t grant you your wish. Perhaps there’s something else you might want?…

Wyrm: *feeling unsettled at the princes bewildered expression* c-can you make me bigger? Stronger?… I’m supposed to be the dragonborn but… Im useless on my own…

Nerevar: Wy-wyrm I don’t think that’s a good idea-

Voryn: *gently takes nerevars hand, his concern giving way to intrigue and confusion* shhh, I don’t think… I don’t think he can actually do anything to him.

Clavicus Vile: *no longer appearing confident or cocky with his powers, now just a mix of confusion and mild fear as he tries again* Okay- let’s see if this will work-

Wyrm: *gently pushes away from taliesins arms and stands pretty, waiting for the prince to work his magic*

Clavicus Vile: *holds his hand over him, suddenly surrounding Wyrm in a sphere of energy, his magic pulling at his body, his skin, his bones, his muscles, trying to make him bigger, to grow, to change in any way he can, only to release him as he ultimately fails, leaving him there staring at the unchanged mer, horrified at how untouchable he is* I… I don’t know what he made you with or how but- I-I don’t even think Boethia could change you!

Wyrm: *standing there looking crestfallen, simply just drops down to the floor and hugs his knees to his chest* okay… can you take your friend back now at least?…

Clavicus Vile: *visibly rattled trying to figure out just what exactly Wyrm is, why he feels so familiar in a way beyond just that of the clockwork god* y-Yeah, b-barbas come here.

Barbas: *smiles looking up at him then at Wyrm* Thank you, don’t worry I won’t let you leave here empty handed! *hurries to his masters side, both of them turning into stone statues once more as he reaches him, only now the mask once in Viles hand, now seated in front of Wyrm*

Wyrm: *picks the mask up quietly* thank you…

Clavicus Vile: I don’t know how it’s possible, I’ve never encountered a mortal like you, but I can’t help you change yourself… If you ever need a wish though involving, anything else, you have my boon. It’s the least I can do seeing as you’ve restored me back to my full power! You forget what that’s like when you’ve been stuck in a cave for 3 years!!

Voryn: *opens his third eye scanning the statue as silence fills the space once again* they’re gone.

Taliesin: *leans down gently helping Wyrm up to his feet* are you okay?…

Wyrm: *staring at the mask* … I don’t know anymore…

Lucien: …Okay so I knew things were already beyond interesting given who you guys are- *gestures to the whole group* But he just crippled a daedric prince by doing nothing and you’re all just- not freaking out over it?!

Inigo: oh yes it’s quite normal for us at this point.

Caryalind: my first day with this group I travelled through the sewers beneath solitude to find it had been merged with the shivering isles all because Wyrm went sleep walking after a sword and a chunk of amber that we handed over to the captain of sheogoraths guard.

Taliesin: I met him after he absorbed the soul of lorkhan and our second day together he imploded a dragon just by looking at it.

Kaidan: he nearly levelled all of winterhold and almost murdered a bunch of psijic monks.

Inigo: he shares sugar cookies and gossip with a floating mass of energy called the augur of Dunlain.

Nerevar: he’s the reincarnation of sotha sil, at least, we think he is, we’re not sure anymore.

Voryn: He is and he isn’t. He witnessed the birth of creation and achieved chim in his own right.

Lucien: And you were just going to keep this hidden from me?! I have so many questions!

Wyrm: so do I… and no answers to show for them… *sighs hiding his face in taliesins robes* how am I going to defeat alduin?… what if Esbern can’t help?…

Taliesin: … *picks him up holding him close as he rests his head on his shoulder* shhh, you will, we’ll find a way. If he’s of no help then I’ll do everything I can to find you your answers… *kisses his cheek softly* I promise…

*that evening*

Wyrm: *sitting in his and taliesins tent, braiding his hair as he stares at the pages of his book, watching the patterns swirl* what are you hiding from me?… why am I not allowed to know?… *scowls* this is my life, why do you keep trying to ruin it?… *blinks watching as a monarch butterfly suddenly lands on the page, flitting its wings open and closed slowly, revealing a different colour each time* … *looks down to the wabbajack & sword of jyggalag by his bed roll* …You want… to talk to me?… *looks back at the butterfly*

The butterfly: *flits it’s wings and flies up, landing on his forehead, knocking him out cold with a feathery touch*

Taliesin: *peers into the tent to see no butterfly, only Wyrm sleeping. Seemingly haven fallen asleep trying to read his book* oh love… *picks up the book and stares at it for a moment before scowling as he closes it and tosses it aside* Blasted thing… *huffs and leans down pressing his lips to Wyrms forehead* sleep tight love… I’ll try my best to help you… even if it’s not enough… *sighs and climbs back out of the tent to join the others in keeping watch. All of them unaware of the two masked groups, eyeing both them, and each other up from beyond the treeline*

#wyrm dragonborn #skyrim taliesin #voryn dagoth #nerevar #Lucien skyrim #Caryalind skyrim #inigo skyrim #Kaidan skyrim

[morrigan-le-faye]

Critical Role Predictions: Campaign 3 Edition

So I caught up with CR during quarantine, and now I have brainrot. This will be the very first time I start a campaign at the same time as everyone else. So for the future, my posts regarding critical role will be tagged as “CR spoilers”. I am sorry for everyone who follows me for something else. I am sorry that you have to witness the person I will become tomorrow. But I’m not going to apologize for becoming that person, cause nerdy ass voice actors playing DnD make me very happy. Also, no race predictions here. I just don’t have enough knowledge of what races the cast like to play and what they like about the races to make a prediction I’m happy with. With that, onto my guesses.

Ashley first. I think she’s gonna go with Paladin. Pike and Yasha were both heavy hitters very connected to their deities. I think Ashley enjoys giving damage, and the strong religious associations help her build her character. Of course, I could be wrong, Fearne didn’t have the religious associations, but it’s nice to try something different. In terms of subclasses, I think there’s gonna be a lot of Tasha’s rep, so Oath of Glory would be good.

Laura now. I think Laura absolutely loved Jester’s trickery abilities, but wasn’t the biggest fan of the cleric’s base abilities. She’s shown a preference for mixed classes (Ranger, Cleric, Four Elements Monk with Farriwen) I think Laura would make a fantastic bard. Specifically I think Creation or Whispers would suit her playstyle. Laura can be a mastermind if the situation calls for it, and just loves doing insane stuff.

The one, the only, Mr. Sam Riegel. I could see him doing a Life cleric purely to dunk on Laura for Jester not healing, but more seriously, I’m thinking Sorcerer, possibly Aberrant Mind or Wild Magic. Sam brings a special kind of chaos to the table, and while Nott/Veth got some of that good magic as an Arcane trickster, I feel like he missed the amount of spells Scanlan had during campaign 2. Plus, we haven’t had a sorcerer since Tiberius, so I wanna see at least one person try it.

Travis, I’m thinking he got a taste for spellcasting with Fjord. Druid maybe? Circle of the Shepard, just because I love the thought of Travis with an animal companion.

Taliesin, in my heart of hearts, i’d love for him to play a Warlock. I don’t think he will though, just because it’s too obvious, King of the Goths being a warlock. Since Tasha’s revamped the Ranger, I think it would be great if someone took another crack at it. I‘d love to see Tal do Horizon Walker or Fey Wanderer, I think that’d be fun. Or he‘s gonna do another Matt Homebrew Class, cause he seems to really like them.

Liam, I wanna say Blood Hunter. He seems to like both martial and magic classes equally, he had as much fun with Vax as he did with Caleb. Order of the Lycan, because he just seemed so happy with being the big strong guy in Darrington Brigade, and I feel like he wants a break from super-squishy Caleb.

Marisha is a wildcard. I feel like she hasn’t found a playstyle she really really likes yet, so she could go with anything and it would make sense. She’s gonna romance a goth with wings though. Girl is consistent in that respect.

#critical role #campaign 3 #cr spoilers #marisha ray #liam o'brien #taliesin jaffe #travis willingham #sam riegel #laura bailey #ashley johnson #matt mercer

[angelsndragons]

So, after rewatching the Grove scenes enough times to make my head spin and rewatching Certain Scenes, let’s talk Caduceus. Yes, this is going to be long. No, I am not sorry.

Blanket TW for this series: as we will be delving into Caduceus’ backstory, quick warning for discussions of drug use, self-harm and self-neglect, and general depression.

Part 1: Chosen and Unchosen

So one of the most interesting aspects of 130 is how Taliesin and Matt took what could have been simple sibling rivalry and made it a fundamental core to both Caduceus and Calliope in particular. Back in episode 96, Colton and Calliope both were described as put out or annoyed that Caduceus saved them and created enough seeds to save the Grove. Matt specifically mentions their wanting to be the ‘hero of the family.’ 

In particular, what’s fascinating to me is that, all things considered, Calliope seems a much stronger ‘protagonist,’ a much stronger PC if you will than Caduceus on first glance. She wants out, she wants adventure, she wants to save her home and be a hero, she has spent years honing her fighting and crafting skills to be able to do it. If she is a paladin or cleric as many suspect, then her ‘lesser’ abilities connecting to the Wildmother and understanding her will are even the basis of a great campaign long character arc. Hell, her brother minding the Grove gives the party a somewhat isolated, out of the way base they can return to when things get rough. She seems to be precisely the character one would want on a journey like the Mighty Nein’s. And she would have been terrible at it, with them.

Caduceus, on the other hand. Well. Liam’s joke, “You’re just a random shop keep in the woods?’ is kind of on the nose. Unkind fans keep saying that Caduceus is a heal bot or a glorified NPC. Caduceus doesn’t fit the mold of adventurer and never has. And after 130, that is the point. Because the Calliopes are long gone; they don’t wait around for adventurers to find them. They don’t have the patience for it. From 130, we can gather that Caduceus was not just a quiet, responsible, self-sacrificing kid. He was also the kid who just went along with whatever was expected of him and who didn’t seem to have any contradictory opinions of his own. Notice that the Clays are confused and unsettled by Caduceus just walking out of the middle of the conversation; this is not normal to them. The Nein, on the other hand, are not bothered by it; they don’t consider it a tantrum or disrespectful. They are actually used to Caduceus not completing a conversation, to him saying something and walking away or shutting down the conversation. It’s only been the last several weeks that Caduceus has really been reaching out and actively trying to communicate fully. I think it is fairly obvious that Cornelius expected that Calliope would be able to shake Caduceus from his course because she had always been able to. As I said in my playlist analysis, Caduceus only realizes just how far he’s come, how far he has drifted from what his family expects of him when he runs into them again. And he is not ready to go home with them until he can resettle who exactly he is.

All of this is to say, Caduceus began the campaign fervently telling himself that he was chosen to save his home. He anchors himself to that fact. He says that he has always known deep down that saving the grove was his responsibility and that he had been neglecting it. Constance also says she expected him to do it in 96, Clarabelle accepts that Caduceus of all people saved her pretty quickly, Calliope reluctantly admits that everything seems connected to Caduceus, that it wasn’t her time, and thoughtfully agrees to let Caduceus continue traveling if he feels he must. So that begs the question: how did we get to episode 28? No, seriously, think about it. If everyone, from matriarch on down, had a sense that Caduceus would be their savior, what the hell happened? Why was Caduceus alone in that grove, waiting for the Nein? Why on Melora’s green earth did they leave him there?

Caduceus says it himself in 130: he didn’t want it. And his family loves him, imperfectly as we all do. So his sister steps up, says, “I will do it in his stead” and “I want this, let me have it.” And they all go about their lives hoping that it is enough. But. We can’t walk the path laid out for other people. They have to walk the path. Caduceus tried to unchose himself, Calliope tried to choose herself. And it didn’t work. At all. The Wildmother still waited for her chosen Clay to choose to start walking again then pointed him in the right direction. It sounds cruel, in a way. But the Exandrian Prime Deities have always allowed mortals to choose their fates. Even if Caduceus was the only one who could save the grove, it was still his choice whether to do so.

And here is what really gets Calliope’s goat and what Caduceus is sorry for: he enjoys being out there. He didn’t want it but now that he has been out there, there’s a part of him that likes it. What is left unspoken: What if you had left earlier? Taken your mantle sooner? You mean we did all of this for you, because you thought you couldn’t handle it and now you’re throwing it in my face how much the entire world has come to depend on you?

Honestly, I love this deconstruction of the Chosen One trope. Caduceus had to choose himself, as surely as he unchose himself. His fate, and the fate of so many others, is defined by his choices. What a painful lesson to learn.

I have *checks notes* four other parts I’m currently working on, including Apathy is Death and What Does Manure Do for a Garden, so I’ll be back soon with them.

#caduceus clay #caduceus meta #critical role #cr spoilers #my meta #i warned y'all #clay family #cr caduceus #if you choose not to decide #you still have made a choice

[thessalian]

Thess vs TLoVM Ep. 6

So now that I have a decent desk chair, actual liveblogging!

Hello, Dominic Monaghan!

Matt really is in every episode, isn’t he? Then again, men with brown longish hair aren’t exactly uncommon. Still, there was an eyepatch! And then he was crushed like a soda can.

So the giants look like Ryuk from Death Note. That’s ... special.

“What, ‘cos we all know each other?” THANK YOU, GROG.

So @true0neutral needs to watch this because Yennen is such an awesome priest of the Dawnfather.

Oh SHE SEES ORTHAX DAYUM. I’m sorry, but seriously - beyond the white hair and everything, he hasn’t said enough to determine how much he’s changed yet.

See, I liked the conversation about who’s actually leading, and Keyleth did actually put it best. They each lead when it’s appropriate for them to lead. They shift and change leadership roles depending on what strength is required to get through anything that gets in their way. That’s always been Vox Machina’s strength. It’s when they start thinking any one of them is The Leader that they get all fucked up.

Okay, this is Grog as I know and love him. “Yeah, all this sucks and it’ll probably make a good fight and that asshole fucked me up with his sword so I kind of want to kill him but this just sucks and-- wait. These assholes mean no ale? I. Would like. To--” “GROG NO.” “Oh, let him destroy a thing or two. It’ll be a good warm-up for him.”

I’m sorry, Yennen. But it sounds like Percy’s friend Archie hasn’t changed one tiny bit.

“You’re playing on my emotions. And I can’t say I blame you.” Yeah, nobles and priests sometimes have to be manipulative little shits, but I do love the, “You’re playing me. And it’s working. And I’m so proud of you” tone of voice.

...They’re actually going to do the beret. Oh. My gods.

This is a “Pike needs to internalise the fact that she’s worthy” thing, isn’t it. The fight with the Briarwoods even before she got hit with Delilah’s spell, her not being able to help as much as she wanted to, it’s all a doubt thing.

Well, Stonefell, there might be no room for heroes in Whitestone, but there’s clearly room for dishonourable weasely cowardly bastards using a chained-up dwarf as a punching bag. (Also you’re gonna find that heroes don’t take up that much room until they’re busting your door down. Just by the way.)

Also, HI DARIN DE PAUL! He must have had so much fun with this...

Rory. McCann. HELLO. ...So wait, we get to see Scanlan force that guy off a roof? I’m liking this idea.

This is why At Dawn, We Plan was a whole thing. You’re right, Vax. Mostly. Keyleth’s plan wasn’t bad. I mean, assuming there are any animals worth a shit in Whitestone.

"Nothing but Bad News.” PERCY YOU SHITHEAD. Still, great use of the scope.

I mean, I knew they kept the door bit, but AAAAAAHAHAHA.

“Congrats. Everyone’s getting out early for bad behaviour.” AHAHAHA I LOVE YOU VEX.

Well. That’s ... one way to get through the door.

Nice use of illusions, Scanlan!

And that, right there, is a call to vengean-- DAYUM KEYLETH. I mean, narratively speaking, crushing the head of the resistance fighter who saved the life of one of their own basically marked Stonefell and the entire Briarwood rulership for extinction, but it’s nice to see that as a catalyst for Keyleth coming into her own righteous fury. Also, hello Minxie.

Okay, now THAT was a shot. A shot that could break the haft of a maul that heavy? Also the accuracy of it. Just a really nice touch.

“I wanted you to know it was me.” GAAAAAAAH THAT’S FUCKING TERRIFYING. Kudos to the animators. Also to Taliesin Jaffe because this is all way creepier than his original yelling.

...Then again, the yelling is equally creepy. And again, kudos to the animators; rage like that tends to look laughable in this animation style, or at least ... well, two-dimensional, pardon the pun. But the combination of rage, horror and just plain disgust on his face, both during the shooting of Stonefell and later, when yelling at Vax about his vengeance...

And then the animators let him go to horror-tinged vulnerable shock. No one gets to say the animation in this is bad. Ever.

Yeah, even knowing what does ultimately happen (though I understand that liberties will be taken here), I still get that feeling that whether “I have a sister” ends well is up in the air. I mean, that “This changes nothing” scene is all it took to flag up a few very key points: that Cassandra’s in a bad situation and might well just be going along to keep herself alive, that Cassandra might hold a grudge about being left for dead (because we can see that de Rolos hold grudges), that she has been in the custody of a vampire who likely has no qualms about messing with her head... Just a couple of lines and it sets up Cassandra’s whole moral and psychological battleground, and the defenses Percy’s going to have to get through in order to make “I have a sister” a reality.

So, six episodes in ... while the campaign will always have a special place in my heart (and now I kind of want to watch it again), I like this version ... not better, but in a different way. They’ve managed to find ways to set up the important themes in a lot less time, in subtle yet powerful ways. Haven’t seen much of Mae Catt’s stuff - then again, Mae Catt hasn’t written that much - but this was a winner.

Wait.

Waitaminit.

I happened to see who wrote Ep. 7.

Travis. And Sam.

I have got to see their writing chops. I have to. It’s not an option. I require food first, though.

#the legend of vox machina #tlovm spoilers #Thess watches Critical Role

[theladyregret]

I wasn't a fan yet when episode 26 aired and I haven't watched that far back yet. Why do people blame Ashly Burch for Molly dying?

Ok, sorry for any spoilers then Anon, but I'm not sure how to answer this without them heh

Basically what happened (and sorry if I'm not 100% accurate, it's been a long time since I saw that episode) was at the start of the fight with Lorenzo and his gang Ashly made the decision that Keg was actually a huge coward and her fear of Lorenzo would seriously hamper her ability to fight. So she voluntarily gave Keg disadvantage on all of her rolls for that fight and was not very much interested in actually engaging in combat. A lot of people at the time felt that she threw the fight and that's why Molly died.

In reality Molly died because of a variety of poor decisions made by the entire party. The biggest being their stubborn refusal to flee when they were clearly outmatched but ending with Taliesin putting Molly in a very compromising position. Ultimately the reason Molly died was because Taliesin made the poor decision to use a Blood Maledict when Molly was already low on hit points, rolled too high, and knocked himself unconscious right at Lorenzo's feet. Damage taken while unconscious counts as a failed death save and melee attacks on prone targets auto crit. Crit damage while unconscious counts as two failed death saves so Lorenzo attacked him twice and the second attack killed him. Being only lvl 5 at the time, and without Jester to use Rivivfy, the party didn't have access to what you would usually have to bring a killed character back to life within the time frame required for lower level spells.

The argument could be made that if Molly hadn't fallen unconscious that Lorenzo would have killed Beau instead but it could also be made that if no one had fallen unconscious that they all could have fled, severely hurt but with no one actually dying.

Regardless it really had nothing to do with Keg's disadvantage on rolls because the party would have been outclassed by Lorenzo either way.

#critical role #cr2e26 #ashly burch #cr keg #it was a long live streamed episode #everyone was tired #mistakes were made #shit happens #asks #I will never fault a player for choosing RP over pure game mechanics #if thats how they feel their character would be then do it

[finnskeeper]

Critical Role - Campaign 1 (Thoughts Machina): Episodes 45 - 56

AKA: ~ WE’RE GOING ON A DRAGON HUNT! ~

Travis and Liam in Slytherin shirts is *chef’s kiss*. #Cunning4Life

Apparently that's just the face Liam makes whenever he meets Marisha's rpg-dad

GERN: "Can I modify the fire genie's memory to forget to not kill himself?" LOL 

#feelthegern

Laura's out here stealing hearts (and brooms, apparently)

Dark Scanlan is absolutely something I want to see

If Sam doesn't parody Fiddler's "Matchmaker" with "Mapmaker" I will be disappointed. 

I never understood why Find the Path is such a high level spell...

Taliesin's crow/raven sound is terrifyingly accurate (Benefits of being a voice actor I guess)

ROFL I just looked up the wiki page for Craven Edge. Status: Hungry

I sort of almost feel sorry for those orcs...almost

"What do you see, Percy?" "I see a door that I have conquered."  ROFL

Sphinx fights are so good

Mythcarver is a badass name for a weapon

That assassinate ability is gross. Was that 70 damage with one dagger?

Yes, send Scanlan into the center of the enemy camp completely alone. Nothing will go wrong.

I retract my previous statement. 

"Vox Machina! FUCK. SHIT. UP!"

RIP to Kevdak's elbows

GROG! I love these Nat 20 story points!

MATT YOU MONSTER

Oh thank god

Fassbender is the best golem

Awww, they're all calling her Kiki now

Scanlan fucking proposing at the war meeting? Amazing. (Also, LOL @ MATT'S FACE)

Grog: "Pick a number between 1 and 10." Grog (whispering): "I actually don't know any numbers."

LET'S GO KILL A DRAGON Y'ALL

Vex absolutely fucking Umbrasyl up in the first round is sending me. This is what she's built for y'all

Oh god, Liam's tiny voice is both adorable and terrifying

I am here for this plan. Teleport straight into a dragon. What could go wrong?

He's flying y'all! 1/2 the party is going with him. AND THAT'S WHERE WE LEAVE IT??

Scanlan: "I would like to fist the wound." ROFL

Grog becoming smarter by turning into an eagle is AMAZING and I love all of this

MONSTAH

Oh no, Percy...

GROG!!!

LOL watching Laura's inner struggle standing at the base of an immense dragon's hoard is giving me life

The cannonball contest w/ powers is the best thing to ever happen

Percy...omg

Delayed blast cannonball!

Character Rankings (As of Episode 56):

(Seriously, this list is just fast becoming who do I love most to least rather than who do I like to who I don’t.)

1) Vax (This whole Raven Queen thing has gone so much better than I could have imagined. Also, I love how he takes time for the little things, like sitting with Reginald’s body all night while his friends celebrate their victory.)

2) Keyleth (That druid magic is clutch in just about every circumstance. Need a 150 foot trench to drop bad guys into? Kiki’s got you. Need to evacuate refugees to safety in Whitestone? Have a tree portal. Basilisks threatening to petrify on sight? LOL giant scorpions don’t need to see you to fuck you up fam.)

3) Percy (I love that Whitestone has become a safe haven for refugees. I also love those moments when he just goes off. Boy did 172 points of damage to Umbrasyl in one round+action surge. Iconic.)

4) Pike (MONSTAH! NGL, I was kind of hoping she’d get the killing blow on Umbrasyl, but her moments were great and Ashley is just a treasure).

5) Scanlan (That mansion is amazing. And whatever his relationship with Kaylie is becoming is fascinating as hell to watch. Also, how did they ever think Laura was the dirty-minded one with all of Sam’s innuendo?)

6) Vex (I honestly don’t know what it is, but I’m getting some weird vibes from her these last few episodes. Also, the broom swiping moment was a very interesting character choice. I think I read somewhere that Matt adjusted Vex’s alignment because of it?)

7) Grog (The whole Craven Edge resolution was great, and I’m glad he’s finally free. And that entire Westruun arc with the herd and that story was *chef’s kiss*)

#critical role #vox machina #campaign 1 #thoughts machina #vax'ildan #keyleth #percy de rolo #pike trickfoot #scanlan shorthalt #vex'ahlia #grog

[eponymous-rose]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E38 (October 16, 2018)

Tonight’s guests are Sam Riegel and Taliesin Jaffe (and, as always, Dani Carr and... Tiny Corner Max?)!

Announcements:

The latest episode of Between the Sheets, featuring Daytime Emmy Award-Winning Sam Riegel (TM), aired last night and will be available on YouTube tomorrow morning. Sam: “I feel like this channel is mostly just you and me talking?” Brian: “Are you saying that everyone else is just riding our coattails?” Taliesin: “He’s also saying that you look a lot like Liam at this point, and he can’t tell the difference.”

Another episode of All Work No Play will debut this Friday on the Critical Role Twitch (uploaded to YouTube on Sunday). In this episode, Sam and Liam do yoga... with goats. TJ Storm and Travis Willingham guest star!

Next week the cast will be at London MCM! Taliesin: “I’m packing slightly more tweed.” Brian: “Gettin’ tweedy with it.”

There’s a new (harp music) Laura Bailey emote on the CR Twitch for subscribers.

@critrolestats for this week’s episode:

The M9 hit 150 natural ones in this episode. Number 150 was Jester’s acrobatics check to get away from the yuan-ti abomination.

Jester also set the record for the most natural ones in a single episode: 5. The previous record of 4 was held by Nott and Beau. Brian: “You guys remember these are not still going to charity, right?” Sam and Taliesin: “What?”

Taliesin was the one who helped Momlan glue on her elf ears. Taliesin: “I would be very nervous if my mom were going out there.” Brian: “Well, she’s got hundreds of years of secrets on you.” Taliesin: “Mom of the damned.”

Cad’s definitely been upset about being around undead; Taliesin’s rolled a few times to see if there’ll be a worse freak-out, but there hasn’t been one so far. “The notion is that there’s a direction things are supposed to move, and [undead] is something moving against the grain in an intense way. What’s the point of having an imaginary organized religion of any kind if you can’t have something they’re fundamentally against?”

Nott’s extremely far from her comfort zone right now, being outside the Empire, working for a captain on the sea who’s threatened their lives: “There’s snakes and lizards and... wouldn’t you drink, dude?!”

Given how much he’s been getting the shit kicked out of him lately, is there a breaking point for Cad? “Probably. I haven’t really finished nailing him down emotionally yet. I genuinely don’t know what zen people do when everything goes to shit.” Jester’s speech genuinely comforted him a lot. “Apparently Laura knew what to say.” Sam notes that the party hasn’t really had a chance to sit down and ask him questions about himself so far. Taliesin mentions that Cad’s been ordering drinks but hasn’t actually been drinking.

Nott’s fallen into the role of the mom friend mainly because nobody else has (everyone agrees that Caduceus is more of “a wise pothead”). Brian: “Everyone seems to have so much baggage right now. Half the people seem focused on just holding it together, the other half are focused on the mission.” Dani: “Somebody has to be the level-headed one.” Sam: “And why can’t that leveling force come from a three-and-a-half-foot insane goblin alcoholic?”

Once Caduceus levels out (he’s still a little shell-shocked), he’s going to realize that he’s surrounded by “unhealthy lunatics” and will want to do something about that.

Sam’s done some research about chemistry (although he wants to make more of a cheat sheet after Travis’ experience with sailing), knowing it might come up with Nott’s alchemy knowledge. Taliesin is trying to learn more of what Sam terms “that fungus shit”. Also tea, and zen. Sam: “I was thinking you should go to a morgue and see how bodies decompose.” Taliesin: “Oh, I have some experience in that.” 

(don’t worry; it’s just some friends in forensic anthropology)

Gif of the Week: Taliesin casts Detect DM Shenanigans.

“There was a certain order to the universe that he has come to expect, and it has been thrown into great disarray.” Cad was expecting the Epic Quest to save his home, but he wasn’t expecting the Mighty Nein. He’s mainly staying because of what Jester said about not necessarily needing to understand what’s happening right now. “He’s confused and trying his best to just let things happen, because that’s how the Wildmother works.”

Nott’s been surprised by some of the Mighty Nein’s actions, but so far she knows it’s out of necessity. She doesn’t view the incident on the docks as quite as bad as some of the others did---it was chaotic and based in self-preservation rather than actively causing harm. “But some of the other actions lately have been surprising to her.” Sam points out that she and Caleb did a lot of things to survive, and that she still steals a lot, and reminds everyone that she lives in a very morally grey area. She’s not thinking of leaving at this point, and all the high-stakes trauma has brought her closer to the group. “It’s a fucked-up dysfunctional family, but it’s starting to look a little bit like a family to her.”

Taliesin and Sam are both enjoying being moral compasses of the party this campaign, in major contrast to the previous campaign. Brian: “You were a teenage asshole. You were a teenage dirtbag.” Taliesin: “It’s so weird. I love it.” Sam: “Oh man. We’d better step up our game. If we’re the moral compasses...” Taliesin: “We’re like Cracker Jack compasses, we almost point north.”

Cad’s got a lot of abilities he just doesn’t use very often. “He knows that some of it is... rude? Death cleric, man, they’ve got some insane shit.” Cad doesn’t have the same opinions on life and death as most people. Brian: “How surprising.”

Taliesin is having “a ton of fun” playing Caduceus. “I love Molly... and the character. Too easy.” No, but seriously: “I loved playing Molly, but the nice thing I got to do with Caduceus that I didn’t get to do with Molly is we had an established group and I got to create a character that was useful to the dynamic both mathematically and emotionally.”

Sam: “Wait, is it twitch.tv or twitch.com? Oh my god, I’ve been putting the wrong links on my Twitter for like a year.”

Cad was very selective about who he told about Jamedi, and purposely didn’t tell Nott because he knew she’d tell others. Sam, trying to keep a straight face: “Nott’s nothing if not trustworthy.” He’s more surprised that Caduceus has figured that out already, given how little he knows about Nott. “Maybe it speaks less to Nott and more to Caduceus being judgey...” Taliesin clarifies that it wasn’t so much that Nott was untrustworthy, it was more than Nott couldn’t keep a secret. Sam, as a player, was shocked that the rest of the party didn’t instantly tell everyone that “we are being led through the jungle by a dead guy.” Taliesin points out that with two clerics (Brian: “well, a cleric and a battle Mercy”), they literally have a button they can push to make him go away if they need to.

Sam: “It seems like Fjord’s going into a real bad place without any information, and Nott’s there to support and make sure he doesn’t die, but it seems like a bad idea.” Taliesin: “This seems like a test of one’s soul, and Caduceus is on board but aware that this could go badly.” Taliesin also points out that the rest of the group isn’t aware of the creepiest stuff going on because they weren’t there for it.

Fanart of the Week: the group (sans Jester and Caduceus) inside Leomund’s Tiny Hut! 

Taliesin got recognized in public, and the fan immediately called out the two clerics for going off on their own in the middle of the night. Taliesin: “It was a good burn.”

Caduceus had some experience with fights pre-M9 (grave robbers, wildlife). Taliesin: “Have you ever seen Cemetery Man? Shit gets weird!”

There’s a brief interlude while everyone arranges a movie night. As you do.

Has Nott been feeling protective toward members of the Nein other than Caleb? Fjord is probably the next-likely candidate, followed by possibly Yasha. Sam: “Caduceus is just too tall.” Taliesin: “I feel that.”

Taliesin describes Lesser Restoration as “the aspirin of D&D”. He’s done some healing of illness before, but this has just been a bad time. Sam points out that in the last campaign they didn’t really have to deal with disease so much. “I assume it’s Bird Flu.”

Scanlan stealing the gun was messing with both Taliesin and Percy. Nott is interested in the mechanics of the gun, interested in the chemistry of gunpowder, and has already designed and manufactured one explosive arrow as a result. “But Nott has also noticed that there’s people with guns wherever they keep going, and it might be a good idea to have a gun. It’s a self-preservation thing. If that also happens to mess with Taliesin Jaffe, I’m not going to say no to that. I mean, the heart does what the heart does. If that happens as a result, we’ve all grown as people.”

They realize there’s about a four-foot height difference between Caduceus and Nott. Taliesin: “He squats.” Dani: “He’s got killer calves.”

Caduceus is very, very good at reading people. Nott doesn’t lie because of goblin upbringing, but more out of her travels with Caleb and having her first impulse to be to get out of any situation by lying to stall/delay/confuse. 

Taliesin: “Why lie to a plant?”

There’s a brief interlude about telling your plants inappropriate bodily measurements. As you... do? Brian: “I’m calling an Uber right now. I’m sorry. I’m done.”

Taliesin is collecting spells based mainly on what he can guess might be helpful. He doesn’t need a lot of damage-dealing, so focuses more on deflecting and healing. He’s picked out some feats he’s interested in to make Caduceus less likely to take damage. “That’s been a problem. I don’t like being hit.”

It is pointed out that all of Sam’s characters in the campaigns have had high intelligence and low wisdom. “That’s a pretty great winning combo for comedy.”

Legends of the Hidden Talks Machina:

Overwatch mains? Sam: “What’s a main?” Taliesin: “It’s like Quidditch...”

Taliesin is a support main, especially Zenyatta and Brigitte.

Brian is a D.Va main (woo!) and also plays a lot of Orisa.

Look, I gotta cheer on anyone who also mains D.Va. Those are the rules.

They agree that watching Sam play as Hanzo would be funny, but decide Roadhog would be the best. Sam: “Yeah. It’s Hog Noon. Is that what he says?” Brian: “Yep.”

What’s Matt’s character name?  Sam: “Tyrone McCabe.” Brian: “It’s close!”

Ghost stories? Taliesin: “I’ve been ghosted.” Sam: “I saw some raccoons in my backyard?” Taliesin: “I got attacked by a skunk when I was in my hot tub.”

Taliesin: “Now I’ve seen a ghost.” Past and present combine:

Taliesin has a 1930s stripey swimsuit, because of course he does.

What (harp music)-style sound cues would they have? Taliesin: The sound of building a temple in the original Warcraft. Sam: An... explosion? Brian: The sound of my mom’s tears because he never became a doctor. Taliesin: “I was thinking the Golden Girls intro.”

Goth advice for the week, courtesy of Taliesin: Best style eyeliner is eyeliner on day 2. Put on the eyeliner before the shower. Know if your choker’s loadbearing.

#critical role #critical role spoilers #talks machina #talks machina spoilers #long text post

[returnofismasm]

I’ve been trying to think of a way to write this out in a way that is polite and non-confrontational, but I’m likely never going to do that entirely so fuck it I guess. This is long so I put it behind a cut out of courtesy. 

 There is, I’ve noticed, a big double-standard with the way Caleb ships (specifically Caleb’s side of ships) are viewed by the fandom compared to every other character’s ships. It kind of came to a head last night when Taliesin said, quite nicely, that Caduceus was not attracted to Caleb. 

 The horror? 

 It’s disappointing if you shipped it, and I’m not trying to mock you about it. But Clayleb was essentially a rarepair with like five people and a dog shipping it until last Thursday. Five days later it was gently shut down in canon, with explicit endorsement from Taliesin that people can do what they want in fandom. 

 (Side tangent this definitely wouldn’t have happened if Taliesin wasn’t asked three leading shipping questions in a row on an episode of Talks where Liam wasn’t even there. Can we maybe chill with asking this type of question on Talks. The cast feels weird. The viewers feel weird. Rarely do the answers please anyone. Seriously let’s just stop. Wait until pairings actually become canon. Maybe Jester will finally get some questions that don’t have to do with her crush on Fjord. There’s more to her character than that, y’all. Anyway.)

The response to this has been frankly baffling to me. People have been saying that there will never be a m/m pairing on CR. And I don’t get it? Caleb is not the only man in Critical Role. He doesn’t stand at a metaphorical ticket counter saying “Sorry, you can’t get your ‘Likes Dudes’ badge unless you crush on me.” Maybe Caduceus is ace. Asexual representation is queer rep too. Maybe he's just very inexperienced. Frankly no one has really asked him about it so it’s all just headcanons right now anyway. Hell, while we’re at it, all Taliesin said was that Caduceus wasn't attracted to Caleb. He never said it was never going to happen. Maybe we’re in for a long slowburn. Maybe there will be a romance with an important male NPC. That’s not a lesser relationship. Matt’s a player too, and as anyone who has watched campaign one knows, the relationships between the party and major NPCs are just as influential on the characters as people as the inter party relationships. There’s still tons of story left and predicting any endgame ships at this point is pretty futile. 

 What I find especially frustrating is that this didn’t happen when Liam shut down Widomauk. Liam got kudos because he was aware that Caleb was too damaged for a romantic relationship, and Widomauk had been huge for months at that point. Taliesin says Caduceus isn’t into Caleb and suddenly there’s never going to be a romantic relationship between two men on the show? Can we maybe, just maybe, give the openly bisexual man playing Caduceus a bit more credit than that? 

 Part of this feels like the natural extension of this weird mindset in a part of the fandom that all other characters are important only in their extension from Caleb. Nott is Caleb’s mom. Beau is his sister. Jester is his Manic Pixie Dream Girl. Caduceus is his therapist, and I guess now his therapist boyfriend. Molly is the tragic dead lover. Yasha escapes this only because Ashley’s filming schedule means she hasn’t had as many interactions with him as the others. 

 A lot of this has been coming from some long-term frustrations with how Caleb is treated as so Primary within the fandom. He’s popular, I get that. He’s a lot of people’s favorite character. He’s not mine, but people are allowed to like who they like. But it so often feels as though everything that happens is about him. How he reacts to people or places or events in the story. If Liam makes a sad face or even if he’s just a little quiet, people write reams of meta, even though it was an episode focusing on other characters.  I really can’t help but feel that people would be less upset about a Caleb ship being non-canon if the other characters were given a little more space to exist

#critical role #cr wank #my typical tag for discourse btw #I try to be positive on my blog but I've been very frustrated and annoyed by the way the fandom talks about caleb #let his tag be a preview for the contents #fair warning to all

[wren-hawk]

Campaign 1, Episode 55

A  first time watch and live commentary three years too late.

tl;dr: Vax and Scanlan manage to not be digested, no one plummets to their death, Shale is old and awesome, and Grog fulfills his destiny.

Laura actually forgot her dice. Truly we are on the edge of total collapse. Awww, Travis being the good husband and going to find them/enabling her addiction. Remember this moment three years from now.

Travis is doing the ad read?? This is so wrong. Oh thank God, Sam is here just in time. Dodged a bullet. The bullet being actually hearing about the sponsor. 

I can shorten that recap for you Matt: Everything was great. Until it wasn’t. 

12, 13, and 13. Great initiative rolls guys. Really boding well for the night.

Oh god, is Umbrasyl trying to shit them out?! Oh no, he’s just going to puke them out and eat them again. Like a dog.

Scanlan as a snake is trying to go into a wound. There’s something really wrong with that and I just can’t put my finger on it. 

“Oh, did you want to chase after them?” Really Matt?! That’s a question?! “Eh, fare thee well comrades. We’ll meet again some sunny day.”

Air is queefing out of the slit opened in the dragon. Is this the origin story of Arsequeef?

“I would like to fist the wound.” Amazing. Matt’s face is a landscape of both hatred and giddiness at the same time. I feel like that is a common experience with DMs. Are you fisting or fingering though Sam? Get it right!

Travis’s Nat 1 failure on the chain of returning a turn ago might have saved his life.

Taliesin’s face when he remembers he lost Hex:

Vax is trapped in the wound. My visual is essentially a baby halfway through being birthed.

Well, Scanlan fists the wound once more creating a whole that he leaps through as Bigby’s hand catches him. My favorite thing right now about watching these old episodes is imagining what these scenes could look like animated some day. This whole episode has been a real visual so far.

Travis with his whole bro look this episode talking about his love for Harry Potter fills me with joy.

And now they’re plummeting out of the dragon. Sophie’s Choice for Scanlan. Sophie chooses Grog. 

HAHAHAHAHA Grog is smarter as the eagle. That’s amazing.

Good job Keyleth. Way to be on time to the party as she finally is able to gate stone to the party. Marisha is now debating about whether or not to take the fall damage as an earth elemental... Guys, I think we should have seen the Keyfish incident coming. 

Chris Perkins! I like that he’s playing an older woman, we don’t really get to see older characters in TTRPGs unless they’re a magic class )or a monk). Probably for obvious reasons as you probably don’t have a long lifespan as an adventurer.

Vax is still tiny. I still don’t understand what the reasoning was for that.

Matt is a liar and a bringer of death and he smiles at you while he does it.

Seriously Travis, you’ve got it at least half damaged, Chris Perkins is here judging you, saddle up chosen one.

Thank god for Pass Without a Trace. These are some low stealth rolls even with that +10.

Pretentious asshole Percy. Schmutz him up Vex!

Only men name their weapons. Testify Shale. Testify.

Shale whacks Vax. I love her. 

Vex bemoaning the lack of a plan. To be fair though Vex, your plans fall apart in 2 seconds anyway, so what’s the diff?

Old rocks, as old as Shale. None of those rocks (or magic) you learn in a hoity-toity tower that those damn millennials are so obsessed with.

“He’s a mad little one isn’t he?” Shale says as Vax runs into the invisible Umbrasyl.

Oof, a 20 and a 1 as Percy’s other gun breaks. Bad News broke earlier and Percy right now is kind of screwed.  

Oh god, acid bees! This is the worst!!!

“Oh shut up you flying suitcase.” Shale is my old cantankerous French grandma and I love her.

Second Vax/Vex screw up of the night. Sam plans to roll Vix as his next character; I hope Vix is an some sort of weird aunt to Vax and Vex that sells some weird merchandise that’s super eclectic and only 4 people in the world are interested in like fossilized faerie farts or something. Maybe that’s my first ever D&D character.

 Ah ha you stupid dragon, I hope you vomit your guts out due to Stinking Cloud farts.

Wow, Sam actually advocating for Trinket to get an attack. We’re in new territory here.

Nat 20 on Pike’s anal probe on the dragon! Spiritual Weapon is good too, but I’m so used to Jester’s chainsaw lollipop that a meathook just doesn’t measure up. Sorry Pike.

Faerie Fire! Yay Keyleth! Underrated spell.

Grog! 64 points with 1 round! Awesome!

Scanlan fingers the wound again. I have closed captioning up and I did originally read it as “anally jams the finger back into the wound” so there’s that.

“Have you ever had sex?” Super awkward pause. Let’s just let that hang for as long as possible.

Holy shit Percy, go to fucking town with this sword! 172 points of damage John Wu style! That’s hot. Even with the smoke. (Especially with the smoke?)

I love when everyone starts to sing along to the inspiration songs. Or in this case, chant the ‘who? who who who?’ for ‘who let the Grogs out?’

Ugh, eye stuff, eye stuff! This sucks!

Everyone is starting to look so tired. Kill this guy!

“Did you add Sneak Attack? Oh no, because nothing hit.” Way to rub salt in the wound Matt.

Just as everyone reminds Laura about Hunter’s Mark, it’s nice to see her reminding Travis about necrotic damage.

Yes!!! HDYWTDT!! And Laura’s reminders about necrotic damage pay off! Jesus, Travis is a poet with these finishing blows.

Good job recovering from that horrible position of last episode. 1 down, 3 to go!

#critical role #vox machina #cr1 spoilers #cr1e55

[nochiquinn]

campaign 2 episode 67: dear matt: what the fuck, man?

(hey I do these for fun but if you like ‘em and wanna throw me a dollar pls check my “about me” page under “support this blog”. sorry for no direct link but [gestures at tumblr])

I'm watching the live captions to see if it helps my adhd/hearing-impaired ass

(I don't know what the proper term is for "injured my eardrum as a very young child and have had reduced hearing in that ear my whole life"; I don't think it's HoH? anyway I'm perpetually terrified that I'm going to offend someone)

lol the stenographer didn't know what laura said with her mouth full either

okay I'm remembering why I don't watch live captions BUT I want to support this feature

is one of them wearing a top hat

(exactly one (1) person will get this joke)

invisible cactaur pose

"I hate you"

"let me give you a visual" is becoming my least favorite phrase

great, light eating bullshit

how many time is beau gonna get burninated saving nott

so if nott gets sober does sam have to drink out of a cup like a normal person

"twenTEEEE?"

"do I feel seen"

"I cast terminex"

FIVE FEET

I will say that given the fact that I fell asleep during adventure zone earlier this episode starting with combat doesn't bode well for my awakeness

"I don't likE IT"

"what if they're nice" "THEY'RE NOT NICE"

"GRAB THAT FUCKIN WIZARD"

caleb is a missle now, catch him

"I can see his hair levitating" matt is a ghibli character confirmed

"you have the ability to freak the fuck out"

"that's right, you eat this shit"

"mama is out and has your wizard"

I got distracted by bf and my discord just says "damn nott" so I'm assuming I missed something epic

"you're gonna fuck it?!"

it's NOT a beast?!

"attacking a mother. so fruedian"

"thirty points of damage" "that's just gross"

"we came to crash your website" "[collective groaning]"

"please don't tell this story" "I have to"

"chernobl-y?"

the pause as the subs tried to figure out how to spell that

Caribbean mist

(I'm not making fun of the stenographer I'm just fascinated by how other people hear these accents without context)

WILL GRAHAM

"it's like a book but smaller and rolled up"

"I guess in a way I'm an Orphanmaker too"

timeshare the nickname

"I always love doing two people at a time"

where's keyleth and her gust cantrip when we need her

"mist is made of water" "so's booze" "......ohgod"

"somethinG'S HAPPENING"

how long has it been since we saw the hourglass?!

"dwarvenforge, sponsoring the mighty nein's deaths"

goonie jam

"this is so unhappy"

MIST MONSTER

ELECTROMIST

BEAU

has it seriously been two hours

this is some aladdin-ass music

don't hit the rock

"I'll allow it bc you're a monk"

BEAU

the campaign 1 cameo we all wanted: doors

"I don't know who this is but I'm gonna let it happen"

"I'm Mary Poppins, y'all"

"do you wanna go down?" "that can mean anything"

"I would tell you if I stole something."

the first half of this episode is so long. going on three hours.

all I'm taking away from this game ranch recap is travis' quiet, repeated "no"

apparently I missed a doozy of an ad when I stepped away to make popcorn

seige weasel

"the sealed door" "isildur" "get out"

"and also it's made of severed tongues"

zambies

"they're dripping in boysenberry jelly"

fucking 1 am combat

as taliesin almost gets high-fived in the face

GET EM

"makin' my way to -" "STOP IT"

someone in chat just went "mr caleb I don't feel so good" and that person is fired from life

how many times is marisha gonna try to knock liam out

"I will just sit and think about things"

"the unicorns are OUT and they are ANGRY"

frumpkin's claaaaaaw

this is how beau loses her feet

ball bearings: the real heroes of campaign 2

DON'T LIKE THAT

the twenties tonight

Please Don't Aggravate the Ghosts

mala: anyone else remember the chasm from c1 with the bodies falling upwards

message whatshisface just like "what the fuck man"

jester has entirely reasonable fears

gross

#critical role #crititag #reaction post #spoilers #liveblog

[wellthebardsdead]

Kaidan: You sure you know how to use that sword ey? It’s damn near the same height as you.

Flynt: *eyes and tongue restored, twirling his fathers blade in his hand* Don’t smack talk me lad. You won’t like how hard you’ll hit the ground if you keep it up.

Kaidan: Oh yeah? You wanna have a go then? *grips the hilt of his sword and charges, only to be tripped by the bosmer ducking low, flipping the Akaviri over his back making him land face first in the dirt* Ugh fock- never seen you use that technique befor- *rolls over and immediately freezes seeing Flynts blade at his throat*

Flynt: I was captured the day before I was to be promoted to captain. I served in the Great War lad. I may only have some 20 years on you but that gap like my height is no reason to underestimate me. I brought down hundreds of men and mer far bigger than you. You want to spar with me then you take it seriously.

Kaidan: *staring up at the small elf finally recognising he’s so much more than the clumsy jovial elf he’d come to know* a-aye, yes, I-I’m sorry.

Flynt: I’m glad. *sheaths his sword and helps him up before turning around to see Taliesin standing there holding lunch* oh hi tallybee~

Taliesin: oh- 🍾

#Taliesin calm down Sam can’t keep up #skyrim taliesin #Kaidan skyrim #flynt dragonborn #bosmer dragonborn

[arodrwho]

critrole 2.75 lb

something something liam, i assume this is abt marisha subbing in?

my internet keeps conking out but i thiiiink i caught sth abt a sensory-friendly relaxation space at some con or other? sth to w/some charity

i hope a$ isn’t involved

the charity name i heard was Not a$, but they have a nasty habit of creeping in sideways when i least expect it so

anyways.

i need to get my phone & eat up some data for this bitch bc it is Not working on my laptop

oh i’ve been informed liam is going to try to skype in??

wild

oh good point nott, i hadn’t considered it might be the wrong cave maybe

lmfao marisha what an incredible voice. good job. i can’t take u seriously but i love u

ok i’m back

“ah, he likes you” a very good caleb impression. i love u beau

ok so

beau wanted a rat. a bat. and a snake

i love.. her……….

o yetis!! nice..

beep beep a lot of stuff i didn’t pay full attention to

“other than that, they’re made of meat, and meat can be stabbed!! :))”

i missed it but i hear marisha did a monotone laugh, which is Very nice

“i will stay with caleb also, just because… someone needs to look/watch out for him” ugh i can hear the shippers already

fuck this

aaand my internet is dead, because of course it is

fuuuuuuck this

doot doot we’re fighting

lmao i love how they’re all like “wait what it’s dEAD?? aLREADY???” jus repeatedly

oh boy i love. marisha’s caleb

have i not said that already i LOVE her caleb

beep beep they murdered all the yetis

beep beep itsa dragonne cayyve

it’s Planning Time

beep beep Ice Spider Queen

what a neat plan

internet died & when it started to run back in i ducked outside

i have no idea what’s happening, i think cad is offering fjord a communion-by-proxy?

interesting

GOD that soft smile from fjord………….

fjord………………………..

he rly doesn’t know what he’s doing w/these questions though lmao

“even for my family a little—” “a little eccentric” “that’s a good word” amazing…

also MINOR CLAY FAMILY LORE,,

oh having looked at the critrole tag i feel the need to clarify that i do not consider the whole “the raven queen was our original patron” thing to be new lore

we been knew that

i was talking specifically abt the implication that all of cad’s family is eccentric

(which we been knew as well, but listen. listen…………)

(i live for every lil scrap my dude,)

tho the implication of a third god i’ve heard ppl muttering about is interesting? i would imagine though that it’s the archeart, the one who. what’s the word. the one who the grove was a gift for. which also is not new information

i’mma have to rewatch that whole bit though cos a) it sounds REAL GOOD, & b) idk man like maybe i’m wrong & it is infact Not the god we already know ’bout

please do not do the yeti costume idea

“in learning through failure” caduceus oh my god

i have missed.. So much of this episode

“you smell flammable” jeez fjord

on the one hand i wanna laugh but on the other, in context, fjord. fjord what the fuck

ancient?????????????

oh fuck and hell

shit shit shit shit fuck and hell

heyyyy they got th mithril

OOOH cool STONE

hey beau pls don’t die

oh boy oh boy oh boy ur still a spider coolgood

NOTT. sTOP ENABLING JESTER!!!

“tears streaming down my face”

nott oh my god. oh my god. just leave the thing and go BA C K

thANK you

G OD THAT’S HORRIFYING

“my licorice” lmfao marisha i love you. i love you

“are like NOPE” smart yetis

“throw 7 platinum out the door. ‘i’m very sorry’” inCREDIBLE

“i know your scent now” well that’s ominous!

holy motherfuck my DUDE

they MAD E  IT

“i can’t feel my toes” rip taliesin

ohhhhh holy fuck

that was. good

that was good

goddamn

#daypost #cr spoilers

[readbythestarlight]

c2e45

GUEST GUEST GUEST

Taliesin with his eyeliner is looking especially goth tonight

oh my god you guys had better make some amazing gifs from this I’m already excited

I’m crying Sam you’re so funny

I’m serious I want all the CR cast reaction gifs

Liam is so cute being all excited about his one shot!!

Oh no

Nott don’t blow up the ship

SAM

OH OH IS IT THE GUEST??

I bet its the guest

CALLED IT

oh god it’s a child

is it two children???

WHAT IS HAPPENING

It’s a child and a squirrel??

Jester is gonna adopt her

Taliesin is like shaking his head about this whole puzzle thing

JESTER DON’T SHOW HER THE

oh too late

She’s like Jester 2 I’m crying and I’m scared

I’m crying

Twiggy

“What is that?”

“We found a Twiggy.”

Oooo identify can’t work

“That’s Frumpkin and a half.”

Cad is very concerned about this hyperactive child who hasn’t eaten well lately

Conjuration glyphs… hmmm…

Oh no hideous laughter on Caleb

Aw dang he succeeded on his save roll

Travis just almost spit out his drink when Matt reminded them about the ship’s name

Jester suddenly a little jealous

Cad: “You have an air of authority”

Caleb: *panic mode*

Caleb honey we have talked about using suggestion on nice people

omg Nott’s got bullets

“I’m sorry that I used arcane trickery on you - can I use your happy fun ball?”

ooooooo!

Awwwwwwww. She’s cute I like Twiggy you guys.

Making Caleb all blush.

Awww and now he’s letting her play with Frumpkin all day. SO CUTE.

Oh. Oh that’s not good.

They literally opened a void hole

Caleb is not happy with this at all

Welcome to the Mighty Nein!

NOTT DO NOT GO IN THE HOLE

I dont like it

Oh my god she’s gonna get her head cut off

God I wanted a shopping episode but this is so much better

Oh daaaamn a fancy symbol

Oh shit it’s a vault

oh god oh god oh god

I mean I know they’re not gonna die it’s fine but still

Oh no

they’re somewhere weird without their tank

Somewhere not on the ship

oh good, corpses

I just wanted a nice chill episode did y’all HAVE to fuck with the magic clockwork ball

oh fuck

they are in the ball aren’t they

Cad’s gonna talk to the dead hellllll yeah

Fjord gets so touchy when people insinuate that he’s skinny xD

Oh jeeze I don’t liiiiiiiike thhiiiiiiis

The hut is super convenient tho

“Let’s kill her” I can’t breathe

So many books Caleb is delighted

OH FRICK

FJORD

Oh god oh no

This is baaaaad

oh no a doll

0/10

Matt what’s with the horror stuff

Ohhhh shit a book with spell equations

Caleb’s trying really hard not to put his curiosity about the book over his concern for Fjord

and now he’s taking it

BEAU

and Jester oh dear

“I can’t reach”

Caleb’s gonna cry about all those lost spell books

…an orb?

sure not THAT kind of orb

It’s gonna be an Aladdin’s lamp thing. Touch nothing but the lamp/orb.

OH DAMN is this their first dragon?? I cant remember but I think so

This episode has been a total mixed bag of hilarious and intense and just wtf

They’re all gonna die

I just wanted a nice calm episode with no life or death situations you guys

55 damage

they’re dead

they’re VERY dead

Guys I need to be up in 7 hours why the FUCK did you get yoruselves into a dragon fight

OKAY OKAY WAIT

JESTER CAN JUST PAINT THEM A DOORWAY OUT

Seriously Travis this is why we don’t fucking touch shit!!!!!!

There has to be an out somewhere, Matt wouldn’t just let them walk into this at level 7 without having an out for them

this WILL be a TPK if they stay

AHHHHH JESTER

HOLY SHIT

fuck

oh

oh god

OH NO

FUCK

god DAMMIT IT WAS SO CLOSE

that could have saved them I cry

Oh no oh god oh no they’re dead

what is happening

I… cannot believe Fjord smashing his head into the crystal worked

Oh god, they’re gonna die

Or they’re gonna leave before Caleb and Nott even make it to the fucking dragon chamber

Taliesin is SO PROUD when he’s able to keep someone alive as Cad

Oh Jester

Oh Laura

Oh jester baby

Oh sweet girl

I need to sleep but I cant because I’m pretty sure the last time I passed out early Molly died

They need to leave but Nott and Caleb aren’t there yet

No more splitting up if you lose one of the group you go after them immediately this is so stupid they could be getting away if Nott and Caleb weren’t behind

OH FUCK THEY’RE PRONE

GET UP AND THEN EVERYONE GET THE FUCK OUT

“We’re running, It’s bad” CAD THAT’S THE BIGGEST UNDERSTATeMENT

yesss go Taliesin good call

NOTT GET UP AND RUN YOU IDIOT

nott

no

oh god oh god

Oh god please just run

get the fuck OUT Caleb

“Caleb wait for—oh, okay, bye.” Ouch, that hurts.

Oh god Jester.

We’re gonna lose Jester. I feel it.

oh thank god those bad rolls against Jester

Guys I’m literally gonna throw up

I cant believe Nott took that hit so that Jester could flee

JESTER AND NOTT ARE OUT

RUN JESTER RUN

I CANT BREATHE

SHE HAD 1 HP

AHHHHHHHH

KILL IT

HDYWTDT

PLEASE

YEEEESSSSS

LOOK AT HER SHE DID IT

AHHHHHHH

she did it

oh my god

im weeping

literally shaking

“this is for my ONY FRIENDS”

welcome to the Mighty Nein, baby girl.

please call it, matt, im so tired

oh thank god im going to cry

Orli is fucking tired of your antics, Mighty Nein.

AWWW Matt that was so sweet, letting her have a tooth

I’m crying you guys

Oh shit they were in there for a week??

Caleb’s moody about losing the books. But I’m so proud of him that he chose his friends over the knowledge.

Go the dos I can go to bed please I’m begging

Twiggy you’re so adorable I love you come back someday.

Oh Jester, baby girl. It’ll be okay, honey.

I’m very emotional.

Y’all they need a vacation. A nice day off. No near death nonsense for like two solid episodes.

“Weirdly I think I’m great.” that’s good to hear.

Caduceus is the best team dad you guys.

#emi watches critical role #critical role spoilers #Critical Role

[limey-blue-arty-do]

Tagged by @xdigital-hearts​ (tak~ <3)

rules: fill in your answers then tag 10 mutuals you’d like to get to know better

Star sign: Pisces

Name: Limey (sorry folks, I don’t like giving my name out)

Height:  5′7″

Put your iTunes or Spotify on shuffle. what are the first 4 songs that popped up? (I have an......interesting range)

Stronger - Thirty Seconds to Mars

Forgotten Voyage - Lindsey Stirling

Die Lieder verden bleiben - Faun

Fairy Forest - Adrian von Ziegler

Have you ever had a poem or song written about you? that’ll be a firm No

When was the last time you played guitar? ppfpff probably like. 8 months ago? I really enjoy guitar I just Never Play which is. weird. and really dumb. but yeah

Who is your celebrity crush? currently a tie between Taliesin Jaffe and Marisha Ray

What’s a sound you hate and a sound you love? Hate: sirens. very painful and disorientating. Love: heavy rain on windows

Do you believe in ghosts? Eh, I’m 50/50

How about aliens? Nope

Do you drive? Yes, barely. I’ve got a driver’s practical test to pass first.

What was the last book you read? Good Omens - Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman

Do you like the smell of gasoline? really no

What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? I cycled over a pothole......granted the injury only really started being Bad about five days later when I had to be ambulance’d to a hospital and then spent four days in bed, but seriously. potholes bad.

Do you have any obsession right now? aside from Critical Role, nothing’s really got my attention currently. part of me wants to get back into TMNT, part of me is playing with InFamous self-insert ideas, part of me wants to mess around with my OCs. tbh, I’d prefer to have just the single obsession - I’d be able to focus better!

Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong? honestly, it depends on what they did. I’m friends with 2 ex’s because they’re just Nice People and no-one wanted to loose the friendship aspect of our relationship. 

In a relationship? yep! am part of a poly-trio~

-

tagging: @kryssthenerdwitch, @nevercamebackuptherabbithole, @allthat-andbeetoo, @bumblebeequeenie, @noodle-of-the-internet, @galaxy-of-stars, @bookmawkish, @venake, @opheliassinbin and @translationslostinconstellations!

#outofpencils #tagged #about me

[oryms-braincell]

Hello!!! I am very new to Critical Role. Super obsessed with it currently. Started with the second campaign. I was wondering if there are any IRL relationships here. Or any relationship that will come up in the second campaign (I'm still on episode 4). I WANT A SHIPPPPP!!! (Sorry for bothering you. I have designated you my Critical Role guide.)

Hi there! :)It's always good to see another Critter! I hope you're enjoying it as much as I am.Yes, there are a lot of irl relationships, as the voice actors have all been friends for ages. We have:- Matt and Marisha, who are newly weds and just the cutest- Laura and Travis, who are oldly weds but behave like they just fell in love lol- Brian and Ashley are an item, I think for ages already, though I'm not really sure about that- Sam and Liam are best friends and seem generally unseperable (Liam even calls him "hubby" more often than not)- Marisha and Taliesin are really good friends, too, afaik- Laura and Liam used to play twins, and it kind of swept over how they stand to each other irl, so they are siblings in a chosen family, I'd say (seriously, they're the cutest)- Ashley adores Taliesin, if her Signal Boost episode can be believed (which was generally hilarious, especially the parts featuring Taliesin)And I'm sure I left out a lot because they all love each other, they seem to be very good friends! :)

[toujoursfleurea]

LAYER  001 :  THE  OUTSIDE.

NAME.   Narcissa Black  EYE COLOR.   Cobalt Blue. HAIR STYLE / COLOR.  Infuriatingly long, to the point where if she doesn’t braid it before bed it just ends up a mess of knots and tangles that take at least one of her limbs hostage. It’s naturally curly, but she goes to extra lengths to keep it sleek and straight now that she’s old enough to not have to play the role of her mother’s favorite porcelain doll with all those tight ringlet curls. Her hair is like a platinum marshmallow blonde, it’s about one shade away from actually matching her skin tone. HEIGHT.   177 cm ( 5 feet , 8 inches )   CLOTHING STYLE.   Robes in metallics and rich gemstone colors, she likes a little texture in her fabrics and favors her velvets. She’s a fan of a high collar that accentuates her long neck and likes to accessorize. She likes luxuriant things --- silks, satins, but she’s not really big on laces. If she were one to wear muggle styles, she’d be the type to wear leather pants and a velvet blazer, sheer blouses, structured lingerie, etc. She absolutely hates florals but does have a taste for some of the modernized renaissance styles that became popular in the 70s. BEST PHYSICAL FEATURE.   I’m sorry, is everything not an option? lmao In all seriousness though, she has beautiful eyes and a very elegant neck that dips down into a very nice décolletage.

LAYER  002 :  THE  INSIDE.

HER FEARS.  Failure. Losing her family. Her family killing one another. Not being good enough. Heights. Falling. Disappearing. Pain.  HER  GUILTY  PLEASURE.  Fine wine, good music, and long evenings curled up by the fire.  HER BIGGEST  PET  PEEVE.  Insolence. -_- HER AMBITIONS FOR THE FUTURE. To have a loving family, a safe home, and a content life.

LAYER  003 :  THOUGHTS.

HER  FIRST  THOUGHTS  WAKING  UP.   Her first thought of the day almost immediately goes into some sort of planning mode. What does she have to do that day? Who is she meeting up with? What persona/mask/etc. does she need to take on? Basically, how does she need to prepare herself to take on that particular day? In the younger years, her thoughts often revolve around her family and what lengths she’ll have to go to in order to keep them from each others’ throats. During both wars, there’s a lot of: ‘Well, I’ve survived the night and here’s another day to try and stay floating above the water and keep my world from falling apart even further.’ WHAT  SHE  THINKS  ABOUT  MOST.   Narcissa’s mind is almost always rampant with a thousand and one thoughts at any given second. She’s always concerned with her family, her appearances, her grades if she’s in school --- she holds a lot of philosophical and moral debates in her head, especially in those earlier days when she’s not quite as set in her ways as she’d like everyone to believe. Sometimes she thinks about stupid things, like how people would react if she just jumped out the window and ran off into the horizon. Not that she would, but what if? She thinks about all the things that she wants to do with her sisters, but also what it would be like to do things by herself. She gets a lot of violent thoughts that she doesn’t share and tries to push away as soon as they arrive. WHAT  SHE  THINKS  ABOUT  BEFORE  BED.  Anything and everything that could possibly go wrong in life? Her perceived failures, her misgivings about things she can’t shed light on during the day. Narcissa has a really, really hard time sleeping, so there’s pretty much a guarantee that she’s just staring up at her ceiling thinking the absolute worst. SHE  THINKS  HER  BEST  QUALITY  IS.   Her resilience and talent for quick thinking?

LAYER  004 :   WHAT’S  BETTER ?

SINGLE  OR  GROUP  DATES.   Single. Narcissa hates groups.  TO  BE  LOVED  OR  RESPECTED.   Respected. BEAUTY  OR  BRAINS.   Narcissa once heard someone say that beauty without intelligence is like a masterpiece painted on a napkin. Vain as she is, she still agrees.  DOGS  OR  CATS.   Cats that are the size of a dog.

LAYER  005 :   DOES  SHE…

LIE.   Exceptionally well. BELIEVE  IN  HERSELF.   When and where it counts. BELIEVE  IN  LOVE.   Familial, yes. She’s still not convinced about the rest. WANT  SOMEONE.  Aside from her family? Nah, she’s good.

LAYER  006 :  HAS  SHE  EVER…

BEEN  ON  STAGE.   All her life.  DONE  DRUGS.   No. CHANGED  WHO  SHE  WAS  TO  FIT  IN.   Narcissa doesn’t actually give a damn about being liked by others. lmao

LAYER  007 :  FAVORITES.

FAVORITE  COLOUR.   Burgundy  FAVORITE  ANIMAL.   Her Norwegian Forest Cat, Taliesin. But she does actually quite like dragons as far as magical creatures go.   FAVORITE  BOOK.   A  History of Magic, or any book that deals with the history of their world tbh. If she were ever introduced to them, she’d be a fan of gothic literature and poetry. FAVORITE  GAME.   Rune Riddles and Wizard’s chest. She also likes gambling.

LAYER  008 :   AGE.

DAY  HER  NEXT  BIRTHDAY  WILL  BE.   January 22 HOW  OLD  WILL  SHE  BE.   Verse Dependent

LAYER  009 :  FINISH  THE  SENTENCE.

I  LOVE   my family and my cat. I  FEEL   everything. I  HIDE   everything. I  MISS   my sister. I  WISH   the war wasn’t in my living room.

tagged by: @thescorcher tagging: @fateweary , @hcartless , @madameserpent, @toujourssoldat, @llamentablle (for both the boys), and whoever else wants to do the thing!

#long post // #「 hc 」 ╳ ❝ a morbid longing for the picturesque at all costs ❞ ┈ ( meta )