#sex advice | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stayathomegirlfriends · 7 months

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Hello girls, gays, and theys of Tumblr! Are you in need of two loving gay aunties to share some wise words and help you feel less alone?

We are Cam and Gabriella, a couple of girlfriends who stay at home, and we just started a podcast aptly called Stay at Home Girlfriends. It's an advice podcast and a positive queer and also female-focused (though ALL are welcome) community and we'd love you to be a part of it!

Click the links below to check out our latest episode! I think you'll be glad you did 🥰

Listen on Spotify here:

Listen on Apple here:

OR watch us on YouTube here:

youtube

And click here to check out our socials or submit an advice request!

Hope to see you on the other side and remember you yourself as much as anyone in the entire universe are deserving of your own love and compassion! 💜

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femmefatalevibe · 8 months

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Femme Fatale Guide: Pleasure-Centric Sex Ed. Facts Every Woman Should Know

Some basic sex education: Decentralized from men and heteronormative perceptions of sexual pleasure.

Important for everyone AFAB with any sexual orientation: heterosexual, bisexual, lesbian, asexual, trans, non-binary, etc. Here are some ways to reclaim your sexuality from the patriarchy and heteronormative gaze.

Understand your anatomy, seriously. The clitoris is the female sex organ responsible for pleasure, not the vagina. While you may think of the bean as an isolated love button, it is actually anatomically analogous to an inverted penis and extends internally through the inside of your vaginal wall and the inner lips of your vulva. If you want to more aptly gauge your state of physical arousal, evaluate for hardness in addition to wetness (yes, it looks like a mini boner, lol).

All female (genital-induced) orgasms are clitoral orgasms. Whether they're external, internal, or both. Like its male anatomical equivalent, every clitoris has its own unique shape and size, which can be best stimulated in different ways externally and internally depending on your personal anatomy. Common pleasure zones include the external head "the clit," the "G-spot" (around 2-3 inches deep on the front of the vaginal wall), the "A-spot" (around 4-6 inches deep on the front of the vaginal wall), and anal region (stimulates clitoral legs for some AFABs).

Remember your brain is one of the most important sex organs. Sex is as (or more) mental as it is physical. According to Dr. Emily Nagoski, it is more common for AFABs to have a responsive desire style (aroused by their external environment/erotic cues that stimulate the 5 senses) versus a spontaneous desire style ("heat of the moment" sexual desire that requires minimal foreplay/build-up for pleasure and gratification).

The cervix height and density changes (and can affect how you experience sexual pleasure) throughout your cycle. If a certain position hurts sometimes and is pleasurable at others – whether alone or partnered, know this is normal. Your cervix tends to sit lower with a firmer texture from the end of your cycle and progressively raises/gets softer (thanks to rising estrogen levels) until it reaches its peak height & softness around ovulation. The cervix opens slightly during ovulation and right before/during menstruation (haven't seen a study researching the correlation between cervix opening and higher libido, but I would love to see one on this due to the correlation here for so many women). Learn what positions and techniques are most enjoyable for you during different times of the month (consider this practice as cycle syncing for your sex life).

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bootleg-nessie · 3 months

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This is what my dick sounds like when erect

She pulls down my pants and SPROIOIOIONG

#r/196 #r/196archive #196 #/r/196 #rule #meme #memes #shitpost #shitposting #sex tips #sex advice

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chaotic-archaeologist · 9 months

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got a question for ya regarding sex and online safety.

Background; I am an adulty adult. I have been able to and have voted in more than 3 elections. [I know you take interactions with minors seriously]. I am also ace and autistic. as a result I have never felt the urge to date and I normally don't mind having friends close by.

However, I also just moved for the 4th time since 2019 and would like to meet people.

So I downloaded Grindr. already got my first dickpic lol. I have also been chatting with a fellow who I like and would like to be friends with and I also wouldn't mind exploring my kinks with people... but I have never had to worry about safe online sexy stuff before so I don't know the basics beyond normal internet safety.

What do I do‽‽‽

Okay first, thanks for clarifying the adulty part. This is an awesome question, and here's the advice/steps that I personally follow for situations like this.

Have your first meeting in a public place. Go for coffee or ice cream or lunch or dinner or whatever. But don't meet them alone. This way, if you get uncomfortable with anything that's happening, they're much less likely to continue with that behavior after you attempt to extricate yourself.

Make sure there are no expectations. Plan not to have sex on the first date/meet up. Grindr often tends to ignore this rule since it's very hookup centric, but you're absolutely within your rights to insist on taking things as slowly as you want to.

Don't rely on the other person for transportation. If you choose to meet someone, get yourself there and plan to get yourself back. Walk, bike, drive, public transportation, unicycle, it's all good. But there's much less room for pressure if you're not depending on them for a ride home. This segues nicely into my next point:

Do not tell them where you live. At least, not right now. Plenty of people on Grindr are willing to "host" meaning you can come to their place. That's fine for them, but I err on the side of never giving anyone my address until I've had a thorough chance to assess their character and meet them a few times.

Tell someone where you will be. Let someone who cares about you know that you're going out, where you'll be, and what time you expect to return. Establish a time to check in when you're going home/if you choose to extend the meeting. There are also apps like Noonlight that can function similarly.

Be careful about what you consume. If you're going to enjoy and mind alternating substances, be very, very careful. This goes for anything from getting drinks at a bar to any and all of the recreational drugs on the market.

Be prepared for a little bit of awkwardness. Meeting someone in person is often very different than chatting online. If the conversation is awkward or halting, that's okay. Give it a little time (but also don't be afraid to trust your gut if it's telling you something is wrong).

Communicate clearly. If you have any needs—which can range from an allergy, not being able to stand for long periods of time, needing them to speak loudly so you can hear them, safety concerns—the best way to get those met is to be upfront. You don't need to disclose the reason why you need something if it makes you uncomfortable, just state what you need. People worth spending time with will respect that. The same thing goes for your wants.

Use protection. Maybe this isn't applicable for you specifically, but I think it belongs on this list. Condoms. Dental dams. Gloves. Someone on an app telling you they're negative for any number of things is not an actual guarantee they're not lying to you. Not wanting to use protection (not just for anal/vaginal intercourse, but for oral sex as well) is a huge red flag. Decide in advance what your boundaries are and stick to them.

If it sucks, hit da bricks. Fundamentally, you owe this person nothing. There is no consequence for saying "you know what, I'm not feeling this and I'm going to leave." Be as polite as you want to, but put yourself first.

At the end of the day, the only thing you have control over is you. How you react, where you meet this person, what you do—that's what you control. Hopefully any meet ups will be fun and relatively safe, but just in case, set yourself up for success by maintaining what control you can.

From one adult to another, these are all suggestions rather than rules. Many people on Grindr choose not to follow various ones, and that's fine. Take some time to think about what you're comfortable with and make your decisions accordingly.

Also, best practice for someone sending an unsolicited dick pic (if you don't want them) is just to block that person. But sending a return picture like this one is a hilarious option.

-Reid

#he speaks #sex advice #sex education #internet advice #life advice #grindr #internet etiquette #internet brother

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principiumindividuationis777 · 4 months

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Advice on Intimacy (for Women)

Again, I will keep this tasteful and safe for work.

The biggest hang up most men have is being insecure about being manly enough, including in the bedroom. The way to get him over this, and form a deep emotional bond in the process, is this:

(A) Take the initiative and gently place him on his back, but do not start by kissing on the lips. Start lower, kissing his special places. The reason? This lets his mind relax and lets him know the pressure to put on a performance is gone. He can close his eyes for the moment, moving from negativity to positivity.

(B) With him still on his back, take him entirely, but gently.

(C) Talk to him sweetly, with words like, "Does that feel good?", and encourage him to express little coos of enjoyment, with words like, "That's right, baby (or whatever your terms of endearment are with him).

(D) Talk him through to the big moment, not in a "dirty" way, but softly and sweetly.

(E) Do not stop after the big moment. Keep gently kissing him all over, and keep saying soft, sweet words.

This way, you are in full control of him, but in the spirit of true love. He will not only need you physically, but emotionally, deeply, because you made him feel special, loved and deeply relaxed, free of all the anxious expectations to be macho. He will trust you.To make it full intimacy, emotional as well as physical:

(F) Talk to him about whatever he wants afterwards. Sometimes, just listening to what is on his mind without judgment is what he needs most- and, of course, cuddle.

Of course, do this only for the man of your life, but in truth, if a man does not appreciate this, he is not worthwhile anyway. Most men would be too embarrassed to describe these needs, but I am a man who likes women, and I think this approach to intimacy could even keep relationships together.

Bless you all, and peace:

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femmefatalevibe · 8 months

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Femme Fatale Guide: Must-Watch TED Talks On Female Sexuality

"Confidence and joy are the keys to a great sex life" by Emily Nagoski (required watch for everyone, especially women/AFAB)

"Reclaiming Female Sexual Desire" by Pamela Joy

"Good Sex Isn't About Knowing What You're Doing" by Sarah Byrden

"Cliteracy" by Sophia Wallace

"Joy of masturbation" by Julie Gaia Poupětová

"Shame, sex, and silence" by Dr. Faith Harper

"The Vagina Whisperer" by Tami Lynn Kent

"Women's Sexuality Isn't 'Complicated'" by Sarah Barmak

"The virginity fraud" by Nina Dølvik Brochmann & Ellen Støkken Dahl

"Why We All Lose When We Talk About Virginity" by Shelby Hadden

"Making sex normal" by Debby Herbenick

"Let's Talk About Sex: The Reality of the Sexual Pleasure Disparity" by Grace Wetzel

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bootleg-nessie · 3 months

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Impregnating my wife by jacking off into a water gun and squirting it up inside her (because sex is yucky and gross)

#sex tips #sex advice #r/196 #r/196archive #196 #/r/196 #rule #meme #memes #shitpost #shitposting

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chaotic-archaeologist · 6 months

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You did sex ed before hope this counts

How do you tell the difference between having a preference and being a chaser? Is it one of those thing where if you worry about it youre probably not one?

Hmm, I saw a post a few months ago by another trans blogger (but I can't for the life of me remember who, otherwise I'd try to hunt it down) that really stuck with me.

But basically, the situation was similar to this panel of the comic orientation police:

The OP, a trans man, was dating a cis gay man (who had a dating history of other trans men) because he just... liked trans guys. He found them attractive, and so that's who he wound up dating most of the time.

And the point the OP made was that they didn't feel fetishized. The boyfriend had a type, but being attracted to trans guys doesn't mean he's incapable of seeing them as human beings.

You ask if this is one of those scenarios where worrying that you are one means you aren't, and I think that's maybe close to the truth. By and large, people do not control what they're attracted to, and I having a type doesn't necessarily make you a chaser.

The important question is: are you attracted to people who happen to have a certain trait, or are you fetishizing that particular trait to the point where you are unable to see the person behind it?

Having a type is fine—it is fine to be attracted to fat people or short people or butch women or trans people or blond people or whatever—as long as you're still treating them as people. And you know what? It could be healthy to talk about this with your partner(s). Check in with them. Be honest about your attraction and ask how it makes them feel. Listen to what they have to say and change your behavior if they have suggestions.

-Reid

#he speaks #sex advice #this is complicated and I really wish I could find that post because I think it says it better than I did

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loveadviceforanxiousbeings · 3 months

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Things to bring when sleeping overnight at someone else's place

Obviously not all of these will apply to everyone, but here are some suggestions for those who may worry about not taking the right stuff/forgetting something. Some of these items are included specifically to accommodate disabled people and the neurodivergent. If you have any others feel free to reblog or reply with your suggestions!

Any medication you may need, and an extra day's dose if possible

Any mobility aids if needed

Hairbrush

Deodorant

Toothpaste and toothbrush

Wet wipes/intimate wipes

Makeup remover/wipes, any skincare you like to do everyday

Contraception (could include birth control, male and/or female condoms)

Sanitary towels/tampons if you use

Hair ties/bonnet

Shower gel and shampoo

Clothes for the next day (or more depending how long you're staying) and an extra pair of underwear

Phone charger

Headphones/earphones

Fidget/stim toy(s)

Fluffy socks/slippers if you wear them

Something warm to wear (coat/sweater)

Snacks, especially if you have food issues and would prefer eating a safe food

Wallet with some money (cash and/or card)

Any comfort items that might help you feel safer in a new environment (stuffed animal, blanket, etc)

Feel free to reblog/reply with any other suggestions!

#lovechecklist #love advice #life advice #life lessons #lgbt pride #lgbtq community #lgbtqia #sex ed #sex advice #sex education #inclusive education #disability #neurodiversity #advice #checklist

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blopezz713 · 1 year

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Was feeling myself today! Lol

#aesthetic #beauty #bisexaul #sissi femboi #latino #fitguys #tatooart #hornyyy #cashpig #cash drain #dm me if you wanna see #lovemylife #thinking #art #intimacy #sex advice #sex addiction

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