#sexy theif villain au

[chocoenvy]

okok so this might sound a little dumb

but

hot thief au

except the reader finds out about the gold blood thing before anyone else does and just kinda pieces everything together

but they also just so happen to be an enemies to lovers loving fiend

part of them is like "no you idiot show them and we can end this predicament now"

but the other side of them is like "hehe commit flirtatious blasphemy"

guess which side they listen to

Sexy villain theif au part one part two(? chronologically, it happens after this but it was written first)

I WAS SO CLOSE TO DOING THIS THO- BECAUUSE THEY'RE A HOT THEIF THEY'D PROBABLY NOTICE THAT THEIR BLOOD IS GOLDEN-

WARNINGS!!!: physical violence, mentions of imprisonment, angsty(?), cursing

Quite early on into your theiving adventures, you were getting petty revenge on Mondstadt. With your ever-growing sleath skills, you were in Mondstadt's city in the early hours of night. A cloak over your head and your pace casual. As though you weren't clenching your fists in your pocket to keep them from shaking.

You were better than what you were when you had first arrived to Mondstadt, bright-eyed and with a skip in your step. Then later when they had you in a cage, shivering and teary-eyed. No way to escape if you couldn't use the map to teleport away.

You still remember how you couldn't breath from how much you were crying. How it was the first time in your life where you were sure you were going to die or worse.

But you were better now, you could escape. You'd be okay.

You calmly - as calmly as you could - walked throughout the city. Since it was early night it wasn't too odd, but you'd still have to be careful. You were wearing a mask to hide your face but it was still suspicious. There was really no good way to go about this other than to be confident and act like you belong. And then steal a bunch of shit.

It started with the shops around Mondstat. Oddly enough, they were still open and you could browse their options and then with a slight of hand steal something from a shelf. Then, you went to the alcohol. Same slight of hand trick and what you thought was luck and you had safely smuggled a bottle of wine under your cloak.

Now, this was probably wine-induced as you did take a few swigs, but somehow you ended up in the church. Next thing you knew you were stealing the lyre der hymmel and teleporting outside the city gates.

You were stifling your giggles like a madman - which was more than likely wine induced- when a voice stopped you.

"You," He snarled, and you immediately knew who it was, "I saw you steal all of those items. Now explain to me your reason for it."

You turned around to look at him, stolen goods stuffed in your pockets and under your cloak. You grinned, "Diluc, it's very nice to see you Darknight Hero."

He unsheathed his weapon and you immediately opened up your map to get the hell outta there. But whether it was due to your slightly intoxiacted state, the fact you weren't completely used to your map abilities, or both, he struck you before you had the chance to get away.

You gasped, falling to the floor, however the map still remained in front of you. Quickly, you tapped on it and dissapeared just as his sword hit the dirt you were once on.

You were at the waypoint closest to Beth, the anemo hypostasis, cathing your breath leaning against the waypoint. You clutched your side where he had struck you, applying as much pressure as you could. You bit your lip at the pain, whimpering.

"Gah," You inhaled sharply as you carefully pulled your hands away to asses the damage just to see shiny golden blood twinkling back at you.

You blinked at the blood. You checked to make sure the golden liquid was indeed coming from yourself - which is was - before covering the wound back up.

"The fuck did they put in that wine?" You grumbled, laying down, "Is this why Venti is just a fucking idiot?" You whimpered, tears pricking your eyes. "Fuck, why can't they just leave me the fuck alone?" You bit your lip as you sobbed, stars falling down your cheeks.

You weren't sure when but you had passed out, waking up in the morning with your head feeling as though it was being split in two. The sun wasn't helping and you buried your face into the cloth surrounding you.

Wait- You hadn't had any cloth to lay on other than your own clothes in god knows how long. With that, you jolted awake, sitting up so fast your side pratically screamed in pain. Though it hurt like hell you ignored it and took in your surroundings.

A hilichurl camp. You were in the center, sleeping on the only makeshift bed they had.

"The fuc- wait." You quietly gasped and checked your side. It was bandaged up and didn't seem to be bleeding (even though you had just sat up so fast it felt like it had been torn open). But there was still dried blood on it. Dried golden blood on it.

Your head was really starting to feel like it was being sawn open but your silent panic was interrupted by a friendly slime gently bouncing onto your lap.

You blinked in mute wonder as your hands floated above it hesitantingly. The surprisingly soft anemo slime reached up and nuzzled into your hand, its eyes smiling.

"Shit," You grinned, though there was no amusement in your eyes, just fear, "I'm god now."

-----------

The hilichurls and slimes had sent you off with food and supplies you might need. You thanked them as much as you could and while they were sad to see you off, you told them it was dangerous for you to be in one place too long. You weren't sure if they had understood but they had let you leave with much reluctance after that.

You immedaiately went to the quiet mountains of Liyue. You needed out of Mondstadt.

"Fuck." you sighed, burying your head in your hands as you hid from the beautiful scenery.

You were god. Their god they've been screaming and hunting you down for impersonating. You could end all of your suffering right now, you could show them your golden blood and it'd all be over.

But... did you want it to be over?

Did you want them to be able to bow before your feet? Did you want them to know they were killing their god? Do you want to stop them by revealing your true nature? Or do you want them to continue to act like animals, to continue your game. So that finally, finally when you do reveal your true nature not out of fear but power, you can watch them grovel as they realize nothing can forgive what they've done. To you as a person and a god.

Your frustrated musings were interrupted by a spear whizzing past you, a section of your hair gone with it. You whirlled around to see Zhongli in all his archon glory. His hair, eyes, and arms were glowing an angry orange-golden hue.

Shit, not again. You groaned, standing up and donning your usual cocky smirk. Though, this time it was strained.

You can choose, you told yourself, clenching your fists, your smirk twitching, You could reveal it right now and end all of this. But did they deserve to know right now?

You scoffed and glared at Morax standing before you.

"How you been Morax?" You giggled.

"Silence imposter." He snarled, "I will not be hearing your nonsense today." He pointed his spear at you, "Die without struggle."

You laughed, opened your mouth and laughed as though it was the best joke ever told, "You wish Morax! If I die - and that's big if - I'm going down and taking all of Teyvat with me." You grinned, a mad giggle bubbling in your throat.

Zhongli's eyes glowed and he threw his spear at you again, to which you dodged, but a sword flew at you at well and next thing you knew a catalyst was throwing rocks at you.

Ah, right, this is Morax. Not the reitred Zhongli. You cursed, gritting your teeth as you dodged and a small rock grazed your cheek. It was nothing and hardly hurt, you merely breezed away. You seemed to disappear as you appeared behind Morax.

You reached to hit his throat in a non-lethal move but he swerved around, his sword swinging right into your face. You flinched and attempted to duck, but all of a sudden his sword moved and he had grabeed your face with his hand. You opened your eyes hesitantly to find Zhongli staring at your face, eyes wide, and his breath taken away.

You grit your teeth, "The hell's your proble-" Your breath died in your throat as he wiped the blood off of your face gently, and stared at it on his finger.

"It's-" Tears formed in the corners of his eyes and his voice shook, "Is- i-is i-it-?"

You pulled a switch-a-roo on him and grabbed his jaw, pulling him closer to you as your breaths intermingled, "Let's keep this a secret for now, okay?" You chuckled, a finger to your mouth, and you dissapeared.

Watatsumi Island was peacful as you panted heavily, leaning against the waypoint for support.

"Fucking hell Morax." You panted, sitting down to catch your breath.

You sighed, staring at the Watatsumi shrine, a place you were not welcome, "The hell do I do now?"

#choco.asks #sagau #genshin self aware #self aware au #genshin cult au #cult genshin impact #sexy theif villain au #more sexy theif!!!! #we love them

[chocoenvy]

I miss thief reader <\3

(i wrote this entire thing and then accidentally fucking deleted it. almost cried bc i was proud of it but oh well hhahah)

Pls, i have an event going on rn and one of the things you could request is consort au + sexy thief reader and i jUST- I didn't mean to write all of this I just really wanted someone to request it so I just did it myself oops-

For this I’m using albedo because our pfps…

Warnings: Spoilers for Tsurumi island questline, SAGAU villain au, minor blood, self-harm(?), reader has questionable sanity, implied romantic Albedo x reader

Your reputation preceded you, casting a dark shadow over your cloaked form and painted you in a bloody light. While you had done awful things (only to those who deserved it), a lot of it wasn’t true. Merely rumors that got lost in their game of telephone and eventually got twisted with fact.

Thankfully, a bad reputation helped scare powerful individuals off. The shadow over your form made you appear bigger than you actually were and it helped, especially in scaring off the alchemist in front of you.

He didn’t try to hide himself, his footsteps approached you calmly. The second you heard him, your hearing heightened due to months of running, you had whipped around with your weapon(s) of choice already in hand.

Your glare was sharper than your blades, “What do you want?” You spat. You didn’t dwell on the surprise that he didn’t attack you immediately.

He didn’t meet your eyes, getting on one knee and bowing his head low, “Your grace,” He said, his voice strong as though he had rehearsed this, “I apologize for what Teyvat has done to you, and I promise I will do everything within my power to right the wrong that we have committed-”

“Cut the bullshit.” You interrupted, your fists tightened around your weapon, “I asked what you wanted not for your made-up apology.”

He didn’t flinch and remained in the same position, “I merely want to help you, your grace. I merely wish for you to remain safe.”

You laughed in his face, tilted your head back for the sky to bear witness, “Sure you do! I don’t care what you have to say,” You hissed, your lips twisted back into a teeth-baring grin, “Now go away or I’ll be forced to hurt you.”

He followed your directions, leaving you be. You shook your head with a scoff, watching him go and preparing yourself for a surprise attack.

It never came. How odd… you thought but shook it off. Albedo always tended to inspect the unknown.

He found you again, this time on Starsnatch Cliff.

You didn’t have to turn to know he was there, he was silently standing behind you.

“What do you want?” You demanded, your voice sharp and cutting.

It didn’t faze Albedo as he got down on one knee once more, his head bowed low, “I want to help you, your grace, and atone for the crimes Teyvat has committed.”

“I see.” You unsheathed one of your daggers, the blade glinting dangerously in the setting sun.

Albedo didn’t flinch, readying himself for the pain.

The hilt of the sword poked him on the top of his head. He opened his eyes, shocked, and tilted his head up to stare up at you. You were holding the hilt of the dagger out for him to take, a mischievous grin splitting your face.

His eyes went from the dagger, to you, back to the dagger, back to your almost frightening grin.

You nodded, gesturing to the dagger, insisting for him to take it. He did so, obeying your silent demand with a shaking hand.

“Your grace?” Albedo whispered, if he had spoken any louder his voice would’ve cracked.

“You believe I am your god now do you?” You raised a brow, taking off one of your gloves.

“Yes,” He said, without any hesitation, “I believe you are Teyvat’s creator.” His brows were set in a determined look.

You held your hand out to him and the sun crashed into the ocean behind, framing your almost manic grin in a stunning yet terrifying light, “Then prove it, Albedo.” Your godly voice demanded, reverberating in his mind and getting him drunk off the sound, “Cut me and see what color I bleed.”

Your voice was poisoned honey filling his ears. The way you said his name, commanded him with a grin. There was no doubt you were Teyvat’s god but the words you had said. It made his insides churn as he shook from the sweet sound of your voice and the awful choice you were forcing him to make.

Emotions bubbled within his chest and fought deep within his chalk heart, setting fire to all that was inside him. He couldn’t hurt you, you’d been hurt enough. But you had given him direct orders to cut you, and he couldn’t go against you. He was loyal to you, but he couldn’t hurt you and he couldn’t ignore your orders.

The knife was heavy in his hand. His eyes traveled from your hand, to you, back to your hand, and back to your eyes wide with adrenaline.

His eyes were wide with primal fear, but in the end his shaking fingers let go of the knife. He bowed his head in shame, “I’m sorry your grace, I can’t hurt you.”

You giggled, holding a hand up to your mouth as you cackled like a madman. You bent down to pick the knife up, still laughing. Albedo didn’t move.

Your bare hand tapped the top of his fluffy hair, patting it. Albedo’s breath caught in his throat, “Good choice, Albedo.” He looked up to bask in your grin, drunk on the way you said his name, “Someone who was faking being loyal to me would’ve jumped at the opportunity to cut me.”

Ah, he thought sheepishly, I was so caught up in my loyalty and the choice I didn’t even think about that…

You grinned, manically as you pointed the knife to your arm. He had no time to react as you sliced your arm.

“Your grace-!” He screeched, reaching his hand out uselessly.

“Either way,” You grinned, holding up your arm for him, you, and stars and celestia above to see the golden ichor drip down your limb, “There’s your proof.”

Insane, He thought, his form shaking, You’re insane!

Frantically, he stood up to help you. You pulled away, giggling, “I’ve suffered a lot worse,” You waved him off, sheathing the knife and putting your glove back on, not caring for the festering wound.

You placed both of your hands on your hips, your hat tilted back a bit to allow you to see better, the feather attached to your hat (Ruu’s feather, so that he could travel Teyvat with you like you had promised) glowed a dull purple hue, and your cape billowed in the soft wind.

Albedo could see his constellation in your eyes, glowing as though happy to be in your divine gaze, “Well, my first acolyte,” You held your palm out to him, gloved this time, “Would you like to join me?”

-albedo in thief wear <3

-All of my readers now have Ruu’s flower somewhere on their person

-As you gain followers, their constellations start to appear in your eyes bc i like the idea.

-thief reader amassing a small but devout group of followers to steal shit with them. They’re all poly because sexy thief reader being sexy

basically reader going "What're you gonna do? Stab me?" And Albedo almost cries.

#choco.asks #sagau #genshin self aware #genshin cult au #self aware genshin #sagau villain au #albedo #albedo x reader #sexy theif villain au #sorry if it's kinda bad im highkey tired #and i wrote all of this in like an hour #not including the first draft that i fucking deleted #i still can't get over that #i finished it #and then fucking deleted it #i can't please- #im laying down for rest i'll do more event requests later #I'm almost done with one I'm very sorry for not being that active #life is hard <3

[chocoenvy]

OH. Y GOD... I NEED MORE OF THAT SEXY THIEF VILLAIN!AU??? PLEASE??

BET- (you have no idea how happy it makes me that you're calling it sexy thief villain au-)

Sexy Thief villain au part one

warnings: none

You were so goddamn tired after all of the electro shocks that your body honestly couldn't handle anymore. You wanted to stay awake, to taunt the archons just as they had to you, but you couldn't.

Nothing fatal had happened to you, but you were moratlly wounded. Nearly all of your limbs had gone numb so you could only close your eyes as the panicked cries of Ei begged for you to stay awake.

When your eyes had fluttered open you were encased in soft, warm silk. You inhaled carefully so as to not upset your body with the sudden movements. Thankfully, it didn't seem to hurt that much. Your entire body was just hella sore.

Unfortunately, at your bedside were three archons with tear-stricken faces.

"Your grace!" They'd cried as they saw your golden-flecked eyes flutter open.

Venti hiccuped in sobs as he bowed his head onto your bed, "Your grace- I'm- we're-"

"We're so deeply sorry." Zhongli said, on his knees. He looked composed outwardly, but just one glance into his eyes showed how shattered he truly was, "Please, your grace, punish us for our wrongdoings." He pleaded.

You sighed as Ei also blubbered out her spiel.

Damn, You winced as you carefully sat yourself up, Wasn't banking on the fact I'd survive long enough for them to figure out I'm not an imposter.

The archons noticed your trembling arms attempting to lift yourself up and they rushed to help you. Gently setting their hands on you, and when you flinched and drew your lips back in the beginnings of a snarl, hurt flashed across their eyes. The memories of what they did to you played behind their eyes as they touched you with even more care.

When you were completely sat up you inhaled deeply and carefully. It was easier to breathe this way but your lungs still shuddered at the memory of lightning. The flashes of purple in the corner of your vision as Ei kneeled beside your bed didn't certaintly didn't help.

"Can I just-" You huffed, your voice hoarse and barely above a whisper, "Can I just get a water and something to eat?"

"Of course your grace!" Zhongli said, the three eagerly perked up like puppies.

"I can get the best chefs in Inazuma-"

You cut Ei off, "I don't care about how good it is right now," You heaved, "I'm just hungry."

"Of course," Ei bowed, "I'll get you-"

"Venti can go get it." Zhongli said.

Venti opened his mouth as though he wanted to argue but he didn't say anything. Instead pouting and sending you a longing look as he left the room.

An awkward silence stifiled the air between you three though you didn't really care. All you wanted to do was eat the meal Venti gave to you and then pass out again. Hopefully by the time you wake up once more you'd be healed enough so you can walk around. You really wanted your hat and cape back...

"Your grace," Ei muttered, her eyes downcast, "I understand that you must be angry with us three, especially me. We all understand that... please, punish us. Use us as an example so that nobody will hurt you again." She whimpered, dew drop tears dusting her eyes.

You sighed, your lungs aching at the motion, "I'm too tired to be angry. Maybe, once I'm healed, I'll have the energy to want to murder you but for now," Your eyes met theirs, the godly glow in your eyes was dull, the stars didn't glow as bright and the millions of constellations you bore were absent. There were bags under your eyes, discoloration in your face from bruises, and marks from where your face had been cut, "I'm just tired."

"I hope those months of me terrorizing you was hell, and I hope this is worse."

It was. It truly was. Ei would give anything for you to wink at her again. If filled her up with so much seething anger back then, but now all she wanted was for your gaze to hold something other than indifference for her and her nation. She'd built it for you after all. She preserved eternity all in your image.

All those teasing words, the teasing hearts, the teasing nicknames. She wanted all of it back.

But it was too late, you were tired, battered, and nearly broken. When you were healed and had more energy, you'd be angry. She'd never see your smile again would she?

Perhaps this was her punishment?

#sagau #genshin self aware #genshin cult au #sexy theif villain au #im just- <3 #y'know? #all for sexy theif reader

[chocoenvy]

do you think your going to do another part to the sexy villain thief au? Cause im speechless, AND hooked at the same time!

please im so glad we're calling it sexy theif villain au

And yes! Somebody has requested another part as well but they went into more detail. It wasn't exactly a part three more like fleshing out what the reader did before the archons captured them kind of.

But either way I will be writing more im glad you like it thank you :DDD

(My god y’all love the sexy thief villain reader lmao)

#choco.asks #sexy theif villain au #that name- #i just- #i love it so much-