#she's like (backflip) yikes
while redressing my broken townies i found out an important piece of information: dina caliente is a closet lesbian
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Oh Lord why did I do that
rant/vent in tags uwu
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(rape mention tw)
I saw some Hellers on Twitter claiming that it's homophobic if Soldier Boy doesn't have sex with Homelander on The Boys and I'm fuming 😤😤😤😤 (and they're blaming Jensen for this???).
Soldier Boy is coerced (raped) by Homelander in the comic. Is that really what they are advocating for?? Legit saw someone say soldier boy is queer because he "had sex with a man" and 😤🤦😤🤦 is that how stupid they are? To say men are inherently queer if they get raped by another man???
Their homophobia and fetishizing knows no bounds. The Boys fandom please collect this garbage.
It’s actually difficult to even start to unpack how “problematic” this attitude is, but given their behavior towards the characters, other fans and the cast over the course of the show- I think the root of it is that the hardcore Destiel shippers aren’t real big on the concept of consent...
I made a comment a while ago about how I was glad most of them are women, because they occasionally go from a casual ‘lol, look how crazy this person is’ to a ‘oh...look how crazy this person is....YIKES’. Men tend to be more physically dangerous than women, so if this behavior was being exhibited by men I would probably be doing less laughing and eye rolling and more looking to have them put on a criminal watch list.
Echoing things I’ve said before that trouble me about their attitudes- consent isn’t owed to anyone no matter what mental backflips you want to do, or no matter how much you want to blame the fucking universe for not giving you what you want:
If I hit on a straight girl and she said ‘no thanks, I’m not interested,’ and I then called her homophobic and told her she only didn’t want me because she had been brainwashed by the heteronormative patriarchy, and she told me I was a crazy ass bitch- she would be correct. She does not owe me her consent. This is why the Hellers saying all the bullshit about Dean’s ‘homophobic’ reaction to Cas’s love confession’, was such a problem. I saw one person lamenting ‘he looked like he was trying not to say a slur’....WHAT? So basically their attitude was- a straight guy not reciprocating romantic love (which you don’t have to interpret the confession as, but not the point rn) of another dude is the same as being homophobic. It’s actually not- it’s just not consent. Also the fact that Dean was sad after Cas disappeared didn’t mean he returned his love, it actually meant that he just watched his best friend get dragged to the empty and he was bummed about it.
I don’t know if you can adequately explain to these people that there are actually various forms of human love, since they don’t appear to have any in their lives or they wouldn’t behave the way they do...
So removing consent from a scenario- if a lesbian was raped by a man, she wouldn’t then be bi because of the rape. That’s basically the same argument they are using, and the fact that they don’t see how fucked up that is is honestly mind blowing, but it’s also not a shocker, because at this point they seem to be competing only with the domestic terrorists for the title of ‘most mentally unstable people that exist outside of facilities for the criminally insane.’
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“ It’s Dylan who finally figures out it wasn’t a cult” can we get this as a Drabble? If not it’s fine but 🥺❤️❤️❤️❤️
CW: Referenced ableist language, referenced past head banging (brief), shitty language about the pet industry in a box boy setting
“Your stance on the human pet industry is pretty clear, obviously-”
“Obviously.” Nicole Berras’s voice is deep and slightly husky as she pats the thigh of the smiling, slightly blank-faced man who sits next to her on the plush red couch.
Dylan has had a lot of nights he’s thought about the way it would feel to have the movie star’s voice against his ear like that. I mean, he feels pretty fucking ridiculous afterward, but once he’d seen her in that Marvel movie that was fucking it for him, slam-dunk, celebrity crush slot taken by one Nicole Berras, she of the wide, slightly almond eyes and soft lips worn over a black leather catsuit.
Even if the one time he’d tried to show Chris the movie (one more thing Chris hadn’t known about, and how do you not know about the biggest fucking franchise in movie fucking history, that cult must have been boring as shit), Chris had done nothing but bitch about how there’s no way Nicole Berras could do actual backflips like her character does in heels like that.
Of course not, weirdo, she has a stunt double for that. He’d thrown popcorn at Chris, who had caught it and grinned before popping it in his mouth.
Yeah, well. They, they, they-they-they still should have put her in-... in some, like, regular shoes or, or, or or or something. Chris had wiggled his toes under the blanket they were sharing. Or barefoot even would have, um, would-would... would be more realistic.
Nobody’s going to be barefoot in a leather catsuit, Chris.
Then why make, make her wear the the the-the catsuit?
... Chris, I swear to God-
That catsuit factors pretty fucking heavily into Dylan’s thoughts, too. In the interview, though, she’s just wearing like a regular white shirt and pants and even that looks amazing on her. Everything looks fucking amazing on Nikki Berras.
Dylan checks his phone - an hour before Chris comes back so they can head to the dining hall together, which means an hour to daydream and watch Nikki’s mouth move.
“There’s a lot of Oscar buzz already surrounding your upcoming film, with celebrities as well-known as Vincent Shield speaking out and saying it ‘romanticizes a dangerous, damaging industry’. Do you have any comment or response to him on that?”
Nikki gives a brief, sweet smile. Dylan’s eyes, though, keep glancing over to the man sitting next to her, her pet. His name’s Yen or something, celebrities always give their pets ridiculous stupid names. Dylan wasn’t paying attention - the whole pet thing is kind of uneasy to think too much about, so he mostly doesn’t. Yen-or-Whatever is just... smiling away.
He looks fucking brainless.
“Vince and I have been in this industry a long time together,” Nikki says with a laugh. “And he’s always been kind of down on the industry, as long as I’ve known him. He’s of course welcome to speak his feelings, but I felt like there’s a lot of negative press out there about the system, and that really erases people like Yen-”
Oh, his name really is Yen. Yikes.
“-who are happy with the choice they made, well cared for, and just... you know, Yen and I talk about this a lot.”
“We do,” Yen says, and gives her a slight sidelong glance with a smile.
“And we just... wanted to provide a little more of a balanced perspective. You mostly hear about the liberation movement now-”
“Yes, Shield produced a documentary two years ago that was very pro-liberation that received a lot of critical acclaim, as I recall. Is there a reason you chose a fictional feature film as opposed to an answering documentary?”
“Well, I am an actress.” Nikki flashes her impish little grin, but Dylan misses it. He’s stuck watching Yen, who is watching Nikki with perfect focus, sitting incredibly still. Like a statue next to her, with his head slightly tilted, chin down, looking up at her through his eyelashes even though he’s taller than she is.
Who has he seen look like that before?
Weird fucking deja vu has the hairs on Dylan’s arms standing up on end.
“Feature films are really my wheelhouse, and I felt more comfortable working with a story that gave me a little more room to work multiple narratives into a single film. And Yen was so helpful, he really enjoyed getting to work with me on setting up the plot beats.”
“Right. So in the story, your character goes through the process of training after some serious life hardships, and things really kick off during that process. Can you tell us anything else about the story?”
“I can’t give too much away, Anderson,” Nikki says, laughing, leaning slightly forward. Dylan is still staring at Yen, whose eyes follow Nikki, whose empty little smile never so much as twitches, never fades. “But I can say... Yen helped me a lot with information on the training process! He was originally a demo pet with WRU so he had tons of inside information. The love interest-”
“Ah, right, played by... let’s see, played by Camden Oaks-”
“Right, Camden plays my love interest in the story - and Cam’s a big old sweetie, isn’t he, Yen?”
“Yes, he is,” Yen says automatically, almost before she’s even finished the sentence.
“My love interest is actually a handler at WRU, so they meet early on but it’s not until much later that you see how that initial meeting really impacts my character’s story. Honestly, I’m really honored that WRU agreed to give me so much access to their methods! It was really great of them, and Yen came with me on every visit.”
Yen’s smile freezes, just slightly, but Dylan’s still looking right at him and catches the first flicker of a very different emotion on the man’s face. Even that seems familiar, the way that Yen’s hands twitch, just a little, and then he is very, very still.
“Yen coached me quite a bit.” Nikki’s smile is all perfect straight white teeth. “Especially on dialogue, and how to get the expression just right. And all the work they do! Apparently Yen came with a pretty bad stutter, and one thing that they do is really give the pets individualized therapy that hits on their unique concerns to help them before they end up with an owner. So, like, Yen came with a bad stutter! So they really worked on that with him.”
Yen nods, slowly. “Silence is better than stammering.” His voice is perfect and even, doesn’t tremble in the slightest, has a hint of rote memorization that flattens the syllables and bleeds out all emotion.
Dylan jerks forward and rewinds a few seconds, then plays it again.
Yen, head cocked slightly to the side, giving a nervous, eager-to-please little smile. “Silence is better than stammering.”
Dylan’s breath catches somewhere in his throat, eyes widening.
“Silence is better than stammering.”
“Silence is better than-”
The barcode is visible on Yen’s left wrist, when Nikki pats his arm and he shifts a little, but if someone took that barcode off it’d leave a scar in the exact size and shape of the scarring Chris has.
The empty look in his eyes, like Chris gets sometimes if you yell at him or get into his personal space too fast. The hint of a slight smile, one that screams that he needs someone to tell him if he’s doing it right.
Silence is better than stammering. Chris had said that, when he was in the stairwell, rocking, hitting his head on the wall with tears running down his face, hiding behind his hands. Those exact. fucking. words.
Silence is better than stammering, stillness is better than what I do, silence is better than stammering-
“Holy fuck,” Dylan whispers out loud. “It wasn’t a cult. Oh shit. Oh fuck, shit, oh holy fuck he wasn’t in a cult.”
He’s going to be sick. He’s going to be so sick all over his fucking blankets.
“Chris was a fucking pet.”
His phone buzzes and he glances at it, feeling a wash of ice-cold fear straight down his spine when he sees the message. Chris’s class let out early and he’s on his way back, does Dylan want dinner early?
Chris isn’t even a fucking person. But he is, he’s definitely a person, he’s one hundred percent a person. But he’s not. But he is, but he’s a runaway, his name probably isn’t Chris, oh... oh fuck.
He really, really wishes it had been a cult.
Dylan swallows, hard.
What the fuck does he do now?
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Green Isn’t Your Color
requests are coming eventually lmao whoops (admittedly this sounded a lot cooler in my head at 2am but- here goes! 🤠✨) @bnhabookclub
ShindoXfem!Reader: in the land of kombucha and avocado toast, you figured you wouldn’t run into an old crush from high school. Except you do but kombucha still tastes like a public restroom and this is why you stick to coffee. can you tell ive never written summaries before kdjsjdkf
Pro Hero + coffeeshop AU i guess ??
fluff, flirty banter (the usual on here)
song inspo 🎵 Jealous by Ingrid Michaelson, Tattoos Together by Lauv, Señorita by Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello
/// = POV swap (tho it only happens like twice)
There’s nothing like the minimalist aesthetic of a trendy, soulless coffee shop to get the blog writing beans brewing bright and early in the morning. And by bright and early in morning you really mean 1 p.m. because you woke up at 11 but didn’t actually get out of bed until hour ago. Not that anyone can tell. Pros to having been around your clients and bosses so much- you started dressing like them.
The familiar little da-dum! of your ear buds flicker your music to life- not too big coffee shop jazz personally. That plus the milling about of customers is just enough for you to zero in. Among the masses though, is someone who recognizes you. Cons to sitting right by the drink pick-up counter. It’s only because there’s an outlet under the desk that few people seem to know about.
Urbanization of what’s already the capital city just meant you’re never more than a few kilometers away from a coffee shop. In Shindo’s case, along with all the other young Pro Heroes and college students, this is a good thing. Those solidarity memes on Twitter know what’s up.
The minimal, clean lines of the subway tiles make the place feel strangely clinical if it weren’t for the fairy lights hanging inside the glass cage over the counters. He’s not claiming to be a psychopath but if that fell from the ceiling it would be this weird museum-type experience.
Again, he’s not crazy. But… holy shit- is that?
He gives a polite nod to the flushed-face cashier before separating from the line. A few steps back so he can circle around, brows furrowed in memories. Last time he saw who he was pretty damn sure was you, you were wearing the terrible Ketsubutsu girl’s uniform. Not that the guy’s version was any better. But still.
You two were close at the time, so outside of ugly gray polos over black slacks and skirts, it wasn’t uncommon to be hanging out and in normal people- sorry. Civilian. clothes. But at the time, you lived in torn up fishnets and oversized t-shirts with clunky combat boots that made more vibrations than his own damn Quirk.
It’s not hard to believe people change after high school, but Shindo would be lying if he said he’d never imagined you wearing… millennial pink. He’d recognize your striking face anywhere though for… reasons why he felt his heart backflip when he saw you again. Been a while since that happened.
You still had the same tick of balancing a pen on your puckered lips when you were trying to find the words to write. And the same bad posture. Not to mention the water bottle with now faded stickers on it too. Most of them were Hero-related merch. Lotta UA ones: Shouto, Ground Zero, Deku…
Shindo waited until they called his name at the drink counter before approaching and confirming it was in fact, you, “Woah. [ 💚 ]?”
Frankly you should’ve guessed this would happen. On this Wednesday, at this cafe, in this city of Hamamatsu. The pen perched on your lips clacks onto the countertop as close your laptop and grin sheepishly.
He hasn’t changed much since high school. Physically anyway. That boyish look a lot of girls liked and still like in a man. Maybe you were part of that back when, god- what’s it been… four years? Five? You figure his decidedly playful expression is a Pro-Hero-being-in-the-public-eye thing. Then again, he’d always been like that one makeup brand. The one with the reportedly “better than sex” mascara.
Two Faced? Too Faced.
“Oh, h-hey Shindo! Long time no see.” You finally remember to say as you stand up, “You… come here often?”
He chuckles, “I don’t, but that heart on your order suggests you’re a regular.”
It’s about as awkward as side hugs with a boy you used to have a crush on in high school and then seeing him again five years later in a coffee shop can get. So… not really that awkward compared to other encounters in your line of work. The wedding industry- now that’s two faced. Compared to that, Shindo might as well be crystal clear.
You tuck your hair behind your ear and sip your drink (which has been empty for a minute now but he doesn’t know that), “I have connections. One of the baristas is the younger brother of a client of mine.”
“Does mean you get free coffee?”
“Something like that, yeah.”
“Sure he doesn’t want something more than making you Americanos? Is he putting enough sweet cream in them for you?”
You wince at the thought of your go-to coffee order when you were sixteen, “Oh god. Nice try- it’s a cortada with oat milk now.” Somehow it’s like you never stopped talking after high school.
Shindo rolls his eyes, letting them glance at who he was fairly certain was the barista in question. If nothing else because he was now glaring at him with a steaming cup of coffee in his hand. Yikes. You keep that up and your face will freeze like that, bean boy.
You’d noticed it too just before he asked, “Wanna step outside and catch up some more? It’s… really cool to see you again.”
You smiled, “Let’s do it. I could use a break.” The moment you both exited to the patio, you added, “Honestly I didn’t think I’d run into you of all people. Especially after high school.”
“I mean… is it really that surprising?” He asked, “You left just before our third year.”
“Yeah…” You clear your throat, “So how’s being a Pro treating you? Saw you’re climbing the Hero Billboard Chart.”
“Saw you have UA stickers on your water bottle.” He jeered, noting the subject change.
“Hey! I have a Grand hair pin!” You retorted hastily, “Not that I wear it but… it came in a set.”
Shindo muffled a laugh and shrugged, “I didn’t even know they had hair pins after me. I’m… honored?”
“Yeah, y’know those big ones where they spell out a word? It's like that."
“Guess you’ll have to wear it and prove it to me.” You roll your eyes this time. “What about you though? The last Joke-sensei told us was that you had to go home and take care of your mom in the states.”
“She’s a lot better now.” You report happily, “An old family friend got me a job while I was looking after her there for a year or two as a ghost writer for her photography business. I liked it a lot so- I kept at it. And now I’m back here still doing it.”
“Photography, huh?” He smirks.
You shove his shoulder, “Wedding photography, Shindo. Geez. But coming from the one whose Hero Costume flashes his abs 24/7, I guess I shouldn’t be that surprised you’d go there.”
He leans in and grins when you don’t push him away again, “So you’re looking.”
“You’d literally have to be blind to not notice you’re a narcassist.” You counter flippantly, holding his stare, “It’s only a matter of time before-“
You jerk your coffee cup at him as if to splash your drink onto his shirt, to which he flinches even though nothing happens. The look on his face is priceless even though it’s half hidden behind his hands. So much for being a battle-hardened Pro Hero. Shindo glares at you like you pushed him off the open edge of the playground.
“I’m not even wearing my Hero Costume!” He protests.
“So what? Still the same underneath.” You tense up after that comment, “You’re just lucky it was empty.”
He decides not to tease you about that but only because that barista from earlier elected to insert himself into the conversation, “Miss [ 💚 ]! You forgot your purse.”
So you did. You rub your arm and nod with a smile Shindo recognizes instantly. The I’m-panicking-because-I’m-appearing-incompetent smile. There’s a lot of lingering and longing in the way bean boy brushes your fingers giving you back your bag. Shindo recognizes that too.
“H-How’s work coming along?” The barista asks sheepishly because wow this is awkward for everyone whyareyoudoingthis, “My sister and future sister-in-law talk about your work all the time. You’ve got sucha great personality in your writing!”
God this is painful.
“You’re so sweet.” You giggle, like actually giggle, “Tell my boss that, would you? Thanks again for my purse. Guess my brain slipped with my boyfriend being here~ How come you didn’t remind me?”
You elbow him with this baby-faced pout and Shindo blinks. Coy and innocently flirty. Sickening in your demure little theatre performance you’re putting on. Though that’s less pleasantly surprising and amusing to him than you calling him your boyfriend.
“I lose track of how many I buy you, sunshine.” He says nonchalantly, without missing a beat.
Don’t ever call me that again.
“I… didn’t know you were dating a Pro Hero.” The barista falters, “G-Grand, right? Well, I’ve leave you two alone now! Back to the grind!”
Nice coffee pun.
He scrambles off and Shindo feels your shoulders drop against his arm he’d looped around your waist, “He seems nice.”
“Yeah,” You sigh, “He’ll probably tell his sister who’ll then tell my boss who’ll then get on my ass about not telling her myself. She’s really… amazed. That I can do my job without being married.”
“Didn’t seem like it with how you faked him out like that.”
“Comes with the job,” You drone, “All I do is write about ‘matching wave tattoos’ and ‘finding your soulmate’, it’s a whole persona.”
“It’s still pretty cute nonetheless… Should we get matching tattoos too then?”
You scoff, your derisive laugh at his stupid idea sounding so much more you, “Temporary ones maybe. And you can take your hand out of my back pocket.”
Shindo spins you around so you’re pressed up against his chest, “Can I kiss you?” He asks with his forehead to yours like he’s asking what the weather is, “Your suitor’s still glaring.”
Your brows twitch, “Is someone jealous?”
“I haven’t seen my girlfriend in five years. Can’t I be a little jealous?”
“Fine. One kiss.”
Definitely wasn’t just one. You stopped counting with his hands in your hair after- well. A while. Math is hard when kisses taste like coffee and organic, locally sourced peach scones.
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It Lives In The Woods starters (Part 1)
Sentence starters from Pixelberry’s story “It Lives In The Woods”. Feel free to change pronouns / etc as needed.
“Ugh...who’s texting me at three in the morning?”
“I messed up. I’m so sorry...”
“_____? It’s... been a while. Are you okay? What happened?”
“I went back into the woods.”
“I had to be sure, I had to prove to myself that it wasn’t all in my head.”
“...are you drunk or something?”
“He doesn’t exist. He never did.”
“How’d you get up to my window?”
“What the hell are you doing here?”
"We've barely spoken in years... and suddenly you decide to pay me a visit at three in the morning?"
“Don’t apologize… just tell me what’s going on. You sounded really freaked out in your texts...”
“I’ve got something to show you, but we need to bring everyone.”
“They’re still overseas dealing with my great aunt’s estate or whatever. They’ll be back in a couple weeks.”
“I can take care of myself.”
“I’m getting pretty good at mac and cheese, too. I’ve only set off the smoke alarm like… three times this week.”
“You let me know if you need anything, alright? My door’s always open.”
“Left that hellhole behind a couple years ago.”
“Oh my god, look. I’ve been ghosting this guy for like, two solid weeks, and he just asked me out for coffee again.”
“Oh boy. Just when you think high school might not be the sucking necrotic chest wound that you remember...”
“Yikes. Desperate is not a good look.”
“Maybe he’s just not scared of ghosts? You could try clowns instead. Clowns are gross.”
“Shhhhh… witty comebacks aren’t your strong suit, Track and Field Barbie.”
“You know, I keep meaning to try out this new curse I found on the internet. If you feel a burning sensation in your eyeballs, that’s normal.”
“That weirdo just reads too many vampire novels. With any luck she’ll flunk out and go live in a dirty old shack.”
“Yeah right, like anyone would want to chew on this social reject.”
“You should watch what you say, ____. That mouth of yours tends to get you in trouble.”
“Millionth time’s the charm, right? Maybe this time they’ll actually get in trouble.”
“Good to know I can make you do stuff by saying random spooky nonsense.”
“You gonna tell me what you’re so freaked out about? Or are you having fun dismembering that poor bench?”
“So… what would you say if I told you that last night I saw some kind of… monster?”
“Whoa, plot twist. Keep going.”
“Full disclosure, my knowledge of golems is, like, sixty percent Wikipedia and fourty percent this dude named ‘MagicStan75’ who I met on a warlock forum.”
“The world’s a freaky place, _____. We learned that the hard way.”
“I just wanna be ready the next time something happens.”
“Thanks, _____. I really needed to talk to someone, but I didn’t think anyone would believe me.”
“Jury’s still out on me believing you. You could be making all this up to screw with me.”
“See, I’ve got this whole bitter misanthrope thing going on. If people see us being all friendly, they might think it’s okay to talk to me.”
“You’re not as big a tool as most people.”
“Sit your stupid ass down, unless you wanna watch from the garbage can!”
“You think you’re a klutz? You did a freaking backflip!”
“She’s hot and she can do flips. We can’t compete with that.”
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Underwhelming, full of plot holes, and unresolved storylines to the very end. Supernatural was nothing if not consistent.
Supernatural was a grab-bag of plots and ideas.
Half the problem was that there were so many cooks in that metaphrocal kitchen noone had a clear end goal. Look at all the movie series from the last few years, they changed directors and teams at the drop of a hat, the plot got nerfed every five seconds and characters had no real characteristics.
Like Thor, look at all the personal growth he went through in Ragnarock... and they erased it immediately in the next Avengers movie. Or how ZaSnyder has clearly never read a batman comic in his life and madeit all weird, gritty etc.
Also I think the biggest flaw for Supernatural, was a mixture of the following:
1) It was supposed to end in S5, but the executives kept pushing and pushing for the writers to keep going bc it was very profitable.
2) There were no stakes.
Death is usually the big Oh Fuck NOOOO of a show.
Maybe it gets thwarted in a grand gesture, with love, with sacrifice and tribulation... but when you give the main characters a revolving door to the afterlife, it means nothing.
Why should I care if they’re in danger in this episode? Cas or another angel can snap their fingers and everything’s fine.
3) Sexism. Like, every female character was either murdered in the opening, for dean to reinforce his no homo self through commentary or banging, someone to be a replacement mother who also died for them, someone to die for Sam, or just a few episode prop. Always look sexy tho, can’t be an ugly lady on supernatural unless they’re making jokes about it.
They didn’t pass the bechdel test until S5, and the ladies died immediately after.
4) No homo. They went so hard on no ladies as mains that they ended up accidentally making a gay ship canon, queerbaited like mad, then backflipped to avoid it. With pressure, they pulled a fast one and hurled Cas into megahell for being gay.
5) No diversity, unless it filled a niche or need for that season/episode.
[Think about how in Teen Wolf they brought in Kira for her heritage, and then just fucking dumped her in a confusing way after it was all resolved, etc.] The one I recall most was the african american female hunter who helped the boys track the 7 sins or whatever the fuck that was about.
Her death was just another in the long line used for manpain.
It’s a little hard to see them as heroes when they seem to survive solely by using everyone they ever meet as a meatshield. There’s a river of blood with their names on it... seriously, like yikes.
There was A fat(ish) character who was a lady deputy, and that was her niche. She did get to come back later on in another ep, but that was... how she died I think. The only reason she was there was to get a treatment for being fat.
There are others, but that’s the one I recall right this second.
You would think there’d be more disabled hunters, too.
Deafened by a banshee, lost a limb to a rougarou, night terrors after a bad haunting. Anaemic after being attacked by a vampire. Spine damage/nerve damage after fighting a bigfoot. Etc.
Show us the hunters who have faced this and come out of it.
This whole ‘you hunt or die’ thing leaves no wiggle room.
6) And this is just for 2020, but these motherfuckers would have spread corona like mad if they and other hunters were zipping all over the place.
[Insert the shrek meme here: They aren’t even vaccinated!]
7) The way they treated fans was a little... hmmm. The character of Becky?
It was a shitshow, realistically. The first few seasons were a FUN shitshow, could have used more non-human monsters (even GRIMM managed this alright, by showing how they hid in plain sight through shifting their faces/bodies etc).
It just got... boring.
There were gimmick episodes that caught the attention, like the scooby-doo one and all. But it was more of a ‘Hah they did WHAT now?’ thing than, “Oh shit I need to watch the new season for that ep”. Lmao
I forgot my point here, I have this headache that is going to make driving a nightmare...
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Goodbyes: Chapter Five
Summary: Ella Monroe is the Avengers newest recruit, handpicked by Steve Rogers himself. Indebted to him for reasons unknown, Cap pairs her up with Bucky Barnes. He is tasked with training her to relearn and hone the skills that have long since rusted. Bucky is cold and distant, and Ella can’t seem to break through the wall he’s built up for decades. He sees something in her though, and it scares him to death. Has the fate of these two strangers been sealed? …or will they always be longing…
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x OFC, feat Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson
Warnings: DARKER THEMES AHEAD. Angst, Bucky is a dick, mutual pining, self sabotage, male-on-female violence, description of injuries, PTSD, mentions of blood, violence, and death. Sloooooow burn ahead.
A/N: I continue to be blown away by you guys, thanks so much for all of the love! The tag list is open! so please let me know if youd like to be added! This one is a lil intense, but a beautiful set up in the works ;)
Taglist: @iheartsebastianstan @jjlizz @stuckysbabe @sk493494 (strikethrough means the tag didn’t work! I’m sorry!)
Now this is a tac suit.
Cap had left it outside your door for you to wear this morning. The suit fit you perfectly, and allowed for optimal stealth and flexibility. Combat boots, thigh holster, and duel daggers sheaths. Just some of the accessories you’d been gifted with.
Butterflies invaded your stomach as you made your way to the Quinjet. Doing the best you could today was essential for your career, but that wasn’t the only thing causing your nerves.
Sergeant Barnes would be there, and worse than that, so would his attitude. For the life of you, you didn’t understand why his temperament towards you kept changing.
In private, he’s so kind. He cares for you, and he shows it. But yesterday, like so many times before, he truly seemed to hate you. To have no desire for you to be around, and deem you completely useless.
You arrived on the jet last, seeing Bucky sitting alone. He was inspecting his rifle, assuring it was set to go. He glanced at you for a moment, eyes roaming the suit clung to your body before shaking his head and returning his focus to his gun.
Along the wall of the jet was the weapons rack. You load both your waist holster and thigh holster with pistols, and choose daggers lightweight enough to throw if necessary.
Steve walked from the front of the ship and smiled when he saw you. “Ready?” He asked as took a seat, and strapped himself in.
You nod, doing the same. “Ready.”
You sat next to Steve on the jet, Bucky across from you. Not the ideal seating arrangement but hey, you work with what you got. The visual however was certainly enticing. Sergeant Barnes looked so damn good dressed in his tac gear.
“You okay?” Steve asks sincerely, removing you from your thoughts, and earning a muffled scoff from Bucky.
You nod. Looking at Bucky quickly, “Just trying to keep my focus. I don’t wanna mess up.”
Bucky’s face was stoic. You knew he was a master at hiding his emotions, so that didn’t surprise you.
Steve rested his hand on yours, and Bucky shifted forward. “You won’t. You’re ready, besides you’re gonna be our eyes and ears on the ship. Isn’t that right, Buck?” He asked, calling to his friend.
Bucky, in the midst of checking out his rifle, caught Steve’s gaze. “She’s shouldn’t be here at all Steve.”
You sighed. Bucky truly didn’t want you around anymore. Just the thought of him hating you made you heart feel like it was breaking.
“You trained her. That already makes Ella more qualified than any of the recruits we’ve had.” Steve defended you.
You’re always reminded of how grateful you are for Cap. Without him, you’re sure you’d be dead, or worse.
“I only trained her for a small about of time. Who knows what kind of sloppy habits she’s picked up since then.” He quipped.
“Watch it, Tin-man. Watch it.” Sam spoke from the pilot seat.
Sergeant Barnes ignored Sam and turned his attention back to Steve, “The only reason she’s here is because she likes to defy orders,” he cocked his rifle, “and because you’ve taken pity on her.”
“She has a name, Sergeant Barnes,” You retort quickly, “and last time I checked, I don’t have to take orders from you anymore.”
Bucky stares at you for a moment, “Like it or not Doll, I’m still a CO.“ He secured the strap on his rifle, “and your name to me is Recruit.” He quipped.
You scoff, “Really? Because that wasn’t the case thr—“
“Arrival in 2 minutes 10 seconds, folks.” Sam shouted, cutting you off. Steve stood and walked to join him while Bucky’s eyes continued to remain on you.
You cleared your throat, moving to stand in front of him. “I understand you don’t like me—that you don’t wanna be around me...”
Yikes. Just saying that aloud hurt your heart.
You continued, “But you gave up on me. So why don’t we just go back to ignoring each other’s existence? That way neither of us gets hurt.”
Bucky doesn’t look at you, but you hear him whisper. “I didn’t give up on you.”
You cross your arms in front of you, “It doesn’t matter now does it? Because no matter what I do, nothing is ever good enough for you; I’ll never be good enough,”
“One minute.” Sam announces again.
Your eyes return to Bucky, whose gaze is now fixated on you. “I’m sorry I’m not enough. But I’m gonna prove you wrong, ya know.”
He licks his lips, about to speak when Steve returns, securing his shield to his back. “Ella stay here, keep the comms open. When you hear from Bucky, he’ll give you the all clear to drop the bay doors for extraction.”
You nod, “If you need me out there, just say the word.”
“No.” Bucky says quickly. “You’re to stay in the jet, don’t compromise this mission because you wanna play hero. Understood?”
Sam and Steve exchange glances, but they can’t interject. Regardless of who’s actually training you, Sergeant Barnes is still your commanding officer.
“Yes.” You grumble.
“Yes, what?” He asks sternly.
You let out a sigh of frustration. “Yes, Sir.”
Seemingly satisfied with your answer, he turns and exits jet, Cap and Sam following swiftly behind him.
He’s been more hostile and short tempered with you than ever. After the...incident...a few weeks ago, you thought maybe things would be different. After all, he’d shown you a side of him you had never seen.
Under all of that coldness and silence, he was kind and gentle. He felt more than he would ever let people know, and the regret and shame he was holding onto after what happened...it made you see him in a different light.
But now, since cutting ties with you, he’s colder than ever. Did he realize that maybe it was your fault? You had undone the months of progress he’d made, simply by being yourself. How could he not resent you for that?
Your mind wandered back to the day he came to your room. When he was stood in your most personal space, being the most vulnerable you’d ever seen him be. His touch echoed on your skin. Your mind recalling how your body reacted when he stroked your jaw. It felt electric—it felt right.
A shudder ran through your body, shaking the memories from your skin. Returning your attention to the controls, you had to admit you were a bit bored. You pop your feet up on the edge of the control panel, unsheathing a knife from your belt.
You toss it in the air a few times, catching it without even focusing. Your mind wouldn’t shut up! If it was just recon, why couldn’t you be out there in the field? At least you could have learned how a proper recon mission was carried out.
Despite your boredom and feeble attempts at distraction, Bucky never left your mind.
Sometimes the way he looks at you makes your stomach do backflips. His eyes have a way of piercing your soul, whether he means to or not. You just want him to like you—why do you want him to like you so badly?
A muffled static pulled you from your thoughts. Putting your knife away, you noticed the comm lines were going crazy, and Steve’s line was glowing. “Cap? What is it?”
You heard a burst of rapid fire. “Ella! Get that door open now!” His voice is panicked and it sounds like he’s running.
Your hands begin to tremble as you push your communicator, “What’s your location?” You respond, hoping your voice isn’t sounding as shaky to them as it does to you.
You wait the required 10 seconds for a response. Nothing.
“Cap? Steve? What’s your location?!” You shout. What were they firing at? This was supposed to be reconnaissance only!
Another 10 seconds pass, still no response. Are they hurt? Is someone down? Is Bucky okay? Steve said Bucky would be the one to give you the all clear...
You jump from your seat, and run to the back of the jet. Grabbing the pistol from your hip, you flick the safety off and hit the red button on the control panel.
The ramp had barely hit the ground before your feet do. The forest is thick, and dark but you’d been here before. The terrain becomes less and less foreign as you run your way through it, jumping over roots and dodging branches in your path.
You pause, turning on your heel as you hear the unmistakable sound of gun fire. It’s was Sergeant Barnes’ rifle, no doubt about it.
Thank God. He’s okay. You think to yourself.
The shots are getting closer now. “Cover, cover! Bogies on my 11 and 3!” You heard Sam’s voice in echo in the distance as it repeated in your ear piece.
They’re close. You think.
“Barnes! Cap! Does anyone copy?!” He screams.
No one is answering, but you still hear Bucky’s gun rapid firing in the distance. You had to do something or Sam wasn’t surviving this mission.
Taking a deep breath you push your communicator, “This is Cadet Monroe...I copy.”
Your boots are echoing off of the sodded ground. “Falcon, what’s your location?” You shout breathily.
“Courtyard in the north-most building!” He responded.
Your eyes scan the field looking for the familiar pillars, knowing the courtyard was in the building opposite. You spot the large cement structure looking like the remains of a building long blown to hell, and run for it.
“Cadet Monroe you get back to the jet NOW!” Bucky’s voice rang over the earpiece. Relief floods your veins when you hear it. He was okay and still fighting. You wanted to, but you couldn’t respond, not when Sam was in trouble.
Pressing your back against the cement wall, you peek around it. You spot Sam hidden between two large cement pillars. “Falcon, on your 6.” You whisper.
You see Sam use his peripherals and he nods subtlety. As Sam’s crouched down behind a chunk of cement, he gestured to his left and your eyes meet where he’s looking. There they were, HYDRA. Two soldiers approaching Sam from either side.
Knowing you only have one chance at this, you line up your shot, remembering what Bucky had told you about leading with you foot, and pull the trigger twice hitting the first soldier square in the chest.
He falls instantly, allowing Sam to run closer to where you are. “Now Sam! I’ll cover you.” You call.
Sam rolls across the opening of the pillars as the second HYDRA soldier pops out from behind the wall. You shoot again, but he dodges them. Without hesitation, you pull the dagger from your side and throw it full force. It slides through his chest like butter, nailing him straight through the heart.
“Ella, get your ass back on that jet! That’s an order!” Bucky shouts. He’s angry, you know that much.
Your instinct is to listen, if you don’t you’ll be defying a direct order from a superior officer. Unsure if it’s Sam’s life being on the line or your pride, you don’t respond to Bucky.
You were determined to prove him wrong.
Your lungs are burning and your adrenaline is working on overdrive, but Sam finally reaches you. “Are you hurt?” You ask breathless.
He shook his head, “No, but remind me again why the hell Barnes wanted you locked in there all this time?” He jested, catching his breath. “Thank you, Ella.”
You nod, clipping your pistol back in its holster. “What happened to simple recon? Hmm?” You tease.
He lets out a small chuckle, “Yeah, tell me about it,” Sam pauses to rip off one of his gloves, “Turns out we—GET DOWN!”
His warning doesn’t come quick enough as a bang surges through your shoulder. An indescribable pain covers the right side of your body as you collapsing to your knees.
Reaching up with your left hand, you grip your shoulder tightly, pulling back to see your hand covered in blood.
Is that my blood? You think as your legs give out beneath you, sending your body into the dirt.
Your hearing is muffled. All you can make out is your heart pounding and bullets being fired. You see Sam, he’s yelling for...Steve? That’s what it looks like he saying anyways. He’s waving someone down before you see him jump over you. Your vision is fading and it’s fading fast.
You’re fighting it as much as you can, blinking to keep the darkness from spreading. Coming to the conclusion you were in shock, you try to take several deep breaths, praying the bullet didn’t hit your lung.
Your hearing is returning slowly, and you catch the ending of your name. Was someone calling your name?
His scent hits you first, immediately bringing some sort of comfort to you. You look over and see Bucky secure his rifle to his side. He scoops you up into his arms, careful to not grip your wound. You feel him running inhumanly fast as he holds you to his chest.
Before you know it, your back hits the cool metal of the Quinjet’s deck as Bucky’s body hovers your right side. You know you’re losing blood and you’re losing it fast. The patches of black dotting your vision return as you catch a glimpse of him, panic is framing his eyes.
“S-Sergeant Barnes?” You ask through a clenched jaw.
“It’s me, Ella. I’ve got you.” He replies. You wanted to smile, but the pain forbid it. He said my name again. You think. His tone was soft, kind and...worried? He’s worried about you?
You see him rip a piece of fabric with his teeth. “B-Bucky I’m s—I’m sorry...Sam he was—c-comprom....couldn’t.” You slur. The blackness takes over. You’re sure you’ve passed out from blood loss.
You feel him jostle you, “Ella, stay with me. Come on Els, come on.” Are you dreaming? You have to be dreaming.
If you are, then this dream is vivid, eerily so. You feel a hand stroking your forehead, “I’ve got you, Doll. I’ve got you.”
God don’t wake me up yet. You think to yourself.
You hear more footsteps, suddenly the gentle hand is gone from your forehead and you feel pressure being applied to your wounded shoulder. You smell him still though, his campfire musk filling your nose and calming your nerves. You’re so relieved he’s alright.
“She’ll be okay Buck.” Steve reassures him. You’re sure dreaming now. Your eyes attempt to open once more, the light now is too bright, filling your vision with white, hot blindness. In the struggle to see, you see Sergeant Barnes stand from your side.
He lets out a shaky breath. Turning to away from you facing the side of the ship. The metal is suddenly rattled with a boom as Bucky’s metal fist collides with the side of the jet.
He looks furious. Yelling something at Sam and Steve. You couldn’t make out what it was, but it was a site you definitely didn’t need to see. “S-sorry. ‘M s-sor...” You mumble before the blackness takes over for good this time.
Chapter Six: Right
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“anger, misery, you’ll suffer unto me”
Would you risk your life to save a total stranger? I don't think so.
Have you ever trashed your ex’s car after an argument? No, and I never would. Grow up.
Have you ever done something because of peer pressure you are ashamed of? I don't believe so, no.
Have you ever been embarrassed to introduce your parents to anyone? No.
Would you leave a note on a car claiming responsibility if you damaged it? Yeah; guilt would eat me alive otherwise.
Have you ever used someone's handicapped parking pass to get a parking spot? Fucking ew, no.
Have you ever held back a well-deserved compliment because you were jealous? No.
Do you guilt people into giving you what you want? Ugh, no.
Would most people consider you better than average looking? Ha, no.
For yourself, would you rather have a perfect body or high IQ? Give me the perfect body, living in my horrible one has affected my mental health badly enough. I'm fine with having a moderate IQ. I just want to feel happy in my own skin.
Have you ever embarrassed some intentionally in public? Wow, no.
Have you ever used a false ID? Also no.
Are you embarrassed to tell people your job? I'm embarrassed to tell people I don't HAVE a job.
Do you remember the first conversation you had with the person you have feelings for? I don't. I'm sure it was RP-related and not friendly, but I don't remember the exact convo.
Have you ever got a D or F on your report card? I want to say no; I think the lowest I ever got was a C.
If you had twins, would you give them rhyming names? Ugh, no. I'm sorry if you're into it, but I'm just not. I would want to ensure they knew their uniqueness and individuality was seen.
Is there anyone that you wish was IN your life who used to be? There's a large number of those kinds of people.
What brings out the worst in you? Probably when I'm building up towards a PTSD meltdown. I get VERY short and snappy and am convinced everyone hates and wants to leave me. My mouth also has NO fucking leash, and I know I can say very mean things that I'll regret later.
What do you prefer, Skittles or Starbursts? Skittles.
Mike & Ikes or Jolly Ranchers? Jolly Ranchers for sure.
What is your favorite thing to eat with peanut butter? Waffles (with syrup). Don't knock it 'til you try it, I'm telling you.
What are some wild animals commonly found where you live? Besides birds obviously, there's squirrels, deer, opossums, raccoons...
Have you ever had a lucid dream? I think I've had just one.
What's your biggest problem at the moment? Probably my anxiety having stunted my growth in so many areas.
Have you ever turned down a job offer? I don't think so, no.
What's the longest hospital stay you've had? For what? I think my longest was almost two months for suicidal thoughts. Two months might sound long, but it was like... my third or so psych hospital stay for that same reason.
What's something really basic that you're terrible at? Even the most simple math. I don't even know the majority of my elementary multiplication tables.
Have you ever hugged someone for over a minute? Yeah.
Would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone? I have one there already, but I plan on getting it covered because it was an impulse tattoo that I feel no connection towards.
Have you ever searched for your house on Google Earth? My old house, yeah.
Are you a beach, country, or city person? Country. Living in the suburbs has definitely reminded me of that...
Are you faster at text messaging or typing on the computer? Typing, by a long shot. I make typos texting too much.
Have you ever kissed anybody who had a mustache? Yeah.
Who is the last person that you said "I love you" to, besides family members? Sara.
When was your first real relationship? Sophomore year of high school to early college.
Have you ever cried over an ex? I've cried the entire mass of water on Earth over an ex lmao.
Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? Yes.
Is there something really bad that you’ve done, that only YOU know about? No.
Have you ever copied someone else’s homework? I think I have once or twice, but obviously with consent.
What’s a hobby you would like to try out? If my legs worked like actual legs and I didn't sweat like an absolute pig, I would like to try out herping, but without actually interacting with the animal like picking it up and scaring the daylights out of it. I'd just be happy enough looking for reptiles, amphibians, and inverts to photograph instead. Does that still even count as herping?
What was the last event you attended? My youngest niece's birthday party.
How about the last event you organized? I've never organized an event.
What’s something you get excited about doing and want to do it right away? Whenever I take nature pictures, I'm immediately keen to get them into Lightroom and do the postproduction.
Is there anything you feel you’re better at than anybody else? Definitely not.
What’s the biggest insect you’ve ever seen? If you exclude places like the zoo, that would probably be a rhinoceros beetle or something. Oh no, actually some kind of local moth I don't know the name of. They're beautiful big white boiz.
How about the biggest spider? I might be mis-remembering, but I believe at a reptile convention I went to with Sara, one of the vendors had a goliath bird eater tarantula in one of the cups. I do know it was some tarantula species for sure, though.
Who was the first person to break your heart? My dad. Obviously not romantically, but him just splitting on the family with no proper communication absolutely broke my heart for years.
First person to give you flowers or candy on Valentine’s day? I'm sure that would be my parents. If you exclude them 'cuz that's kinda obvious, I believe it was Aaron, my first boyfriend. I'm pretty sure we were together on Valentine's Day, because I remember getting him a giant Hershey's Kiss.
First band you obsessed about? I wasn't truly obsessed with any band 'til Ozzy in middle school.
Can you do a backflip? No; I've never tried and never will. I was and still am too afraid of breaking my neck. Like I have a MASSIVE fear of paralysis, particularly from the neck down; that fear is actually the biggest one that keeps me from driving, fun fact.
Are you an optimist or a pessimist? Of the two, definitely a pessimist, but I at least think I align most with being a realist.
What’s the biggest lie you’ve told someone? I'm unsure.
Have you ever been hit on by someone of the same sex? Yeah.
How many doors are in the room you’re in? Just one.
Have you ever been engaged and broke it off? No.
Has anyone ever drawn a picture of you? Tyler once drew a picture of him and me. It was cute. That guy still dove in WAY too fast.
Have you ever dated a redhead? I haven't, but I love redheads. Natural red hair is just gorgeous.
What are your thoughts on facial hair on guys? Historically, I seem to generally like some, but it really depends on the guy's general appearance. I can like none at all or a full beard and mustache, it doesn't really matter to me.
Did you go anywhere today? No; my mom is in Florida with her brothers totally cleaning out Grammy's house, so she's not here to take me anywhere.
Do you have any nieces or nephews? Oh yikes, I have a lot. I honestly can't count because I've lost track of how many boys and girls Katie has.
You have a choice to shoot your father or die, what would you do? Jesus. I'd rather die; some things just aren't worth living after, and I'd have no desire to keep going if I killed my father.
Did you ever cry at the end of King Kong? I've never watched it, actually, but I. LOVED. The video game. I haven't played it in years and only faintly remember how it ends, but I don't remember crying.
Are you in any amount of pain at the moment? Quite a lot, actually. It's kinda a TMI subject so I won't delve into it, just know I'm hurting like a bitch.
What was the last sugary thing you ate? I snacked on some chocolate chips earlier today... which I really shouldn't have done, but I think I had reasonable restraint and didn't totally binge.
When was the last time you did something extremely stupid? Who knows, that's not a rare occurrence, it feels like.
Have you been to any parties lately? Only my niece's bday party in February. Thankfully it was kept pretty small, given Covid; not that anyone in that family besides my sister gives a flying fuck about precautions, though...
Can you touch your pinky to your thumb around your wrist? Ugh, no. Close, but not enough. I still have thin wrists and hands, but yeah, yay for being overweight.
If you were to start a charity, what would you call it? I'd hve to put more thought than I'm willing for one survey question. I'd have to decide what KIND of charity I want to start first, which I'm unsure of. Probably something related to animal wellfare and conservation or something similar to the Trevor Project. Maybe LBGTQ+ youth disowned by their families... I dunno. There's so much good I wish I could do.
Are you comfortable with your body? Holy fuck no. It's only gotten worse since I started gaining weight again and almost entirely erased all weight loss progress I'd made.
What is your recent inside joke? Most recently made? Idk, man. I don't make those often.
Would you rather be a human, vampire, or a werewolf? Er, I'm good with being a human. If I was a vampire or werewolf, I wouldn't exactly be very welcomed, I'm sure, and both have seemingly painful traits to cope with.
Are you good at giving directions? It is absolutely impossible for me. I have NO sense of direction, like, at all. I don't know highway names, local exits, etc. etc. etc. etc.
Why did you last curse? Pain when readjusting myself due to aforementioned issue I'm having.
What is your purpose in life? I hope it involves animals and spreading words of peace and an appreciation for art.
What is one of your weak points? I'm very, very, very dependent on others. I'm really working on trying to correct that. I can barely do shit on my own as is.
Who was the last person you heard snoring? My cat, haha.
Would you rather shower by yourself or with another person? 100% by myself. Another person would just get in the way and make me VERY self-conscious of my body, even if it was my romantic partner. Just please leave me alone to hate myself for 10 minutes. :^)
What was your last addiction? You could say my current one is John Wolfe, a really funny let's player I've gotten into. Been bingeing some of my favorite games he has playlists of for a few weeks now.
You are in a tank full of spiders, what do you do? Well one, I'd like to know what kind they are. Venomous? Harmless? You gotta give me the details. If I don't have any, then I'm admittedly freaking the fuck out, even though I know I should stay very calm when trying to get out. Fear would win, though.
If killing yourself meant saving the world, would you? Saving the world from what? But odds are, yeah. I don't cherish my pretty damn mediocre life more than I do the lives of what, 8 billion people?
Have you ever stayed up all night just to talk to someone? Yeah.
When was the last time you eavesdropped someone? I kinda do that sometimes when Mom's on the phone and I can hear her from my room, and if they're on speaker. Particularly if the subject is me.
When was the last time you went to a club? I've never been to one.
How have you been sleeping? Poorly.
Are you adopted? No, I'm not.
Do you like scrapbooking? Not really, no.
Do you collect anything valuable? "Valuable to me." <<<< This. Nothing of great monetary worth, though.
Have you ever been beaten up? No, thankfully.
Do you know anyone with an eating disorder? I don't think so, in my personal life.
What was the last thing you killed? An ant.
Have you ever used someone for money? I never could, no.
When was the last time you went to the zoo? Sigh, it's been many many years. I'm so ready to get my goddamn legs back in shape so I can go again, this time with a REAL camera, too. Last time I went was when I still only had a Kodak EasyShare; I have a professional Canon camera now with much more education on photography too, so I would be in absolute heaven with at least twenty memory cards in need, haha. Maybe next fall...
Is there a teacher you hate more than anything? I actually never had a teacher I hated in my entire school career. It really, really is as simple as just being a respectful student. In most cases, I should emphasize, because I do understand some educators just suck. Now I had some teachers I wasn't very fond of, but most certainly none that I hated.
Do you own colored eyeliner? No.
Do you have manners? I honestly think I'm very mannerly.
When was the last time that you had a pet that died? We last had to put my dog Teddy down; he had cancer and was literally withering away. I knew in my very core that even if we didn't bring him to the vet to euthanize him, he would've died naturally in a very short period of time; I doubt he would've survived another night. Now I'd like to move on.
What is your favorite medication that you take, and why? The combination of Vraylar and Lamictal is the reason I'm alive. It keeps my bipolarity and depression under control.
Do you decorate Mason jars? No, but those are some of my favorite crafts visually. They're very pretty and cute.
Can you see the mountains from where you live? Oh hunny, I wish.
Did you ever play pranks on April Fool’s Day? As a kid, yeah. I don't anymore. I'm not really even a fan of April Fool's Day as an adult because of how cruel some jokes assholes play are.
Which instrument would you play if you could learn to play one? Maybe violin.
Do you part your hair on the left side, right side, or in the middle? The left.
What are some names you like that start with the first letter of your name? Uhhhh Bianca, Braelynn (look I know it's so stereotypically Southern but it's pretty)... and idk from there, those are the two that come to mind first.
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Episode 9: the One where They ~FROLIC IN THE FOREST~
We’re back at the dancing fairy cave.
Stuff happens here that’s, you know, plotty
We’re gonna ignore all that
OUR FIRST WANGXIAN MOMENT OF THE EPISODE is when wwx defends lwj from jc’s ire (oh yeah, one of the plotty things is that jc suddenly is here. Not important why).
Jc is all pissy (bc when isn’t he, honestly?) at wwx for having to chase after him (which he didn’t technically have to but bros don’t abandon their bros to unknown circumstances, okay?) and is complaining angrily about it
Wwx: hey, I’M the one who wanted to follow lwj around because i love him, so don’t get mad at him!
And then wwx looks over at lwj with a little smile on his face, so sweet so sweet!
Plot plot exposition plot
We have to chase down the Smoky Owl of Evil and kill it now for Plot Reasons!
Lol, wwx traps jc, nhs, AND wen qing (oh she’s here now too, btw) in his Golden Glowy Net of Protection so he and lwj can go track down the Smoky Owl of Evil together
Wwx, probably: “STOP INTERRUPTING MY DATE WITH LWJ, GUYS, JEEZ”
And now our beautiful boys are in the middle of the woods when suddenly SPOOKY FOG ROLLS IN WITH OMINOUS MUSIC IN THE BACKGROUND
SHIT’S ABOUT TO GET SERIOUS
Oh nooo, the fog separates them!! Wwx is worriedly calling out “lan zhan, lan zhan!”
Luckily they bump into each other pretty quick so they’re together again
Except, oops, JUST KIDDING
Wwx takes like, two steps to one side and loses lwj again. Even tho lwj is literally right there next to him
But he doesn’t know that so he’s worried and being all cute about it. He bites his knuckle and is thinking “oh noooo, what if the Smoky Owl of Evil got him?!?” So he’s calling out for him, again
EVEN THO HE’S ONLY LIKE, TWO FEET AWAY, LET ME REITERATE
LWJ seems to be able to see wwx just fine bc the look he gives him is all “r u srs, i’m right here”
Thankfully lwj is clever and makes bichen light up all blue and pretty like an epic glow stick. It matches his outfit!! (i’ve decided he did this on purpose. He definitely can control what color his sword lights up as and coordinates it accordingly with his clothes. No, i will not be taking criticisms, because I am Right)
LWJ: I’m right next to you
WWX: *surprised gasp* You should’ve said something!
Uh, he just did wwx, keep up now.
LWJ: the fog is creating hallucinations
WWX: that’s alright! I’ll just get rid of it using my ~glitter talisman~
EXCUSE ME, WHAT??
WHAT IS A GLITTER TALISMAN?
OF COURSE YOU INVENTED A GLITTER TALISMAN, YOU CHAOTIC BI
Too bad it doesn’t work! i wanted to see it in action :( :( :(
Lwj: the fog is also disorienting the mind so you can’t focus
Don’t worry wwx, your talisman didn’t fail because you were having performance issues
It failed because the fog is Evil
WWX: Wait!! Why isn’t your mind being disturbed?
Lwj: it mostly disturbs minds that have lots of thoughts in them
Wwx: *cheeky grin* ah, it’s making use of my infinite wisdom~
Lwj: *looks away in exasperation*
I guess lans are Above rolling their eyes at someone (tho I'm pretty sure he's rolled his eyes at him before) but the way lwj did that gave off intense eye-rolling vibes, let me tell ya
OMG A SENTIENT CHAIN OF EVIL ATTACKS THEM OUT OF NOWHERE
Thankfully lwj is a Skilled Fighter and was able to block it with his sword while doing a SUPER DRAMATIC TWIRL OF DODGING
Ooooh, and when he lands, wwx appears right beside him and they go back to back without even pausing to think
BC THEY’RE SOULMATES AND CAN FIGHT IN SYNC AHHHHHH
WWX: lan zhan, are you okay?
He sound so serious here, and with his determined expression, wwx is ready to get down to business on this evil chain that attacked his lwj
LWJ: I’m fine *still super alert to his surroundings bc he’s an awesome cultivator and that’s what they do*
Okay, pause for a moment to point out how funny the camera shots from above are. The fog almost completely obscures wwx in his dark clothes, but lwj sticks out like a sore thumb. So every time we get one of these shots, it just looks like lwj is chilling by his lonesome in this mega foggy forest lol
Oh, dude, this next part is SO FREAKING COOL
So they’re back to back still, and surrounded by Evil Fog
Lwj: wei ying, focus your senses!
The both of them close their eyes to focus intensely
the the camera is down below, angled up so that LWJ and WWX look tall and slightly elongated but in a badass way!
And then the camera circles around them slowly to really show you just how badass and good looking they are before doing a quick spin around them with DRAMATIC MUSIC in the background
Okay, i’m done geeking out about the camera shot (idk why, guys, but i love those kinds of shots. They’re so thrilling every time!!)
Also LOOK AT MY BOYS BEING ALL FOCUSED AND SERIOUS. GO GET EM SWEETIES, I BELIEVE IN YOU
At this point they haven’t even looked at each other or their surroundings but lwj starts a plan
Lwj: Split fire talisman
That’s it. That’s all he says to wwx.
Without hesitation, wwx sheathes suibian and pulls out that talisman
THEY TRUST EACH OTHER IMPLICITLY
I MEAN, COME ON
THEY’RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A FOREST SURROUNDED BY EVIL MIND-ALTERING FOG
AND WWX SHEATHES HIS SWORD LIKE NBD JUST WITH A WORD FROM LWJ??
SOULMATES ON THE BATTLEFIELD
I LOVE IT
I LOVE IT SO MUCH
AND NOW THEY’RE MOVING ALL SYNCHRONIZED, LWJ BLOCKING EVIL CHAINS WITH BICHEN AND WWX DETERRING OTHER EVIL CHAINS USING THE TALISMANS
AND THEY’RE STILL BACK TO BACK, CIRCLING AROUND TO KEEP EACH OTHER SAFE!!!!!
THEY’RE SUCH A GREAT TEAM
Then we cut for a moment to see how nhs, jc, and wq are doing in their Golden Glowy Net of Protection (it looks kind of like a birdcage actually...glowy golden birdcage of protection?? hmm)
And we’re back at the epic forest fight scene!!
OMG THAT WAS SUCH A COOL MOVE RIGHT HERE
THERE WAS A CHAIN COMING AT WWX AND HE STRAIGHT UP BACKFLIPS OVER LWJ WHILE LWJ SWOOPS TO TAKE HIS PLACE AND HIT THE CHAIN WITH BICHEN
THIS IS WHAT ROMANCE LOOKS LIKE, GUYS, DON’T LET ANYONE TELL YOU OTHERWISE
IF YOU CAN’T DO EPIC BATTLE MOVES WITH YOUR S.O. ARE YOU REALLY MEANT TO BE??
But oh no!! One of the evil chains catches wwx by the neck and drags him away!!
It made him drop his sword!!
IT TIED HIM TO A TREE!!
don't think kinky thoughts don't think kinky thoughts dontthinkkinkythoughts
Oh, now wwx is playing dead lol
Suddenly the Smoky Owl of Evil swoops in to attack his “dead” body (because that bird is a coward that lacks honor)
AND WWX CATCHES IT WITH HIS BARE HANDS
WWX: did you think you could outsmart me?? *proceeds to choke the poor bird to death, yikes*
Lwj finally catches up to wwx but sees that the bird’s been sufficiently murdered so he sheathes bichen
Wwx: did you see who was controlling the Smoky Owl of Evil?
(God, LWJ, you had ONE JOB)
LWJ: he or she was mind-controlling it from somewhere Not Here.
(Oh, nevermind then. You're forgiven)
LOL WWX’S FACE
LIKE, YOU MEAN I NEARLY GOT CHOKED TO DEATH WITH AN EVIL CHAIN FOR NOTHING???
Wwx: *kicks dead bird petulantly*
Side note: A-yuan makes a brief appearance here! Wwx and LWJ go check on their pals who are with the Wens and A-yuan is there!!
It doesn’t really make sense bc i’m pretty sure between now and the end of the sunshot campaign, a few years have passed?? so a-yuan should be much older later, but you know what? I DON’T EVEN CARE.
WHATEVER! I’M NOT HERE FOR THE PLOT.
OR SENSIBLE TIMELINES.
TIME IS MEANINGLESS.
TRUE LOVE IS FOREVER.
ALSO A-YUAN IS FREAKING ADORABLE SO I’M NOT GONNA COMPLAIN!
And now we’re getting more plot exposition about the dancing fairy
It’s less painful this time bc wen qing is the one doing it and she’s gorgeous (take a moment to drown in her big brown bambi eyes! please marry me, wen qing)
More plot stuff happens.
Wwx tricks nhs and jc into chasing after a chicken so he can have ~alone time~ with lwj
Except not really bc they’re there to interrogate wq about the yin iron, aka the main plot device in this story arc
Wwx: the fairy started snatching souls bc the Plot Device was taken from it, right? That’s why it only went after lan zhan when we were fighting it!
Detective!WWX is so cute and clever!!
But god forbid wwx stays serious for more than a minute straight heh straight when not in immediate danger bc then he’s all
Wwx: the only other possible explanation is...IT HAD A CRUSH ON LAN ZHAN LOLOL
(Which, i mean, who wouldn’t, right?)
THE LOOK ON LWJ’S FACE AT THIS! LOL
LWJ: Shut UP
they’re talking serious plot stuff again, boring.
Oh, JC and WQ have a moment and the only reason i’m mentioning it is bc WWX goes and interrupts it, THAT’S KARMA BABY LOL
Now they’re in a town! Not the flower-petal town from before. A different one. Idk.
A hawker stops wwx and gives him a sample of alcohol and lwj gives wwx a disdainful look like ‘r u srs?’ before walking off
The NANOSECOND wwx sees lwj walking away from him, he ditches Mr. Let-me-give-you-free-alcohol and chases after him
Yes, the budding alcoholic ditches the Free Alcohol Man
THAT’S TRUE LOVE BABY
Lol he grabs lwj by the ribbon thing hanging off his shoulder (not the Marriage Ribbon, unfortunately)
Lwj glares at him but it’s like, a mild one
WWX: wait, where are you going??
Lwj: looking for the gentry. For info. *tries to walk away*
Wwx: WAIT *grabs lwj by the forearm*
Lwj: *stares at where wwx is touching him until wwx lets go*
WWX TAKE IT EASY ON POOR LAN ZHAN
HE’S ONLY JUST REALIZED HE’S IN LOVE WITH YOU
HE CAN’T HANDLE YOU TOUCHING HIM YET
Wwx: don’t go without me! You’ll info-gather wrong!!
Lwj: how should i do it then?
Wwx: *cute little grin that shows off his beauty mark*
(gaaahhh, i can’t handle it when he smiles like this, it kills me every time!! that beauty mark is deadly)
Wwx: you should go to the wine house for info instead!!
JC: you just want to get drunk (oh yeah, he’s still here guys, fyi)
Wwx: HOW DARE! I can separate business from pleasure! Ppl gossip at wine houses! We’ll definitely get info there!
and now nhs is joining them
Nhs: lets go find a place to rest
Wow, lwj is staring pretty hard at nhs
It’s a stare that’s like “y r u talking to my soulm8, stop that”
AND THEN WWX GRABS BOTH JC AND LWJ BY THE ARMS AND RUNS, DRAGGING THEM BOTH BEHIND HIM
IT’S SO CUTE
HE’S SO HAPPY!! HE’S GOT THE TWO BOYS HE LOVES MOST IN THE WORLD WITH HIM!!
Also, lol lwj is so stiff even as wwx forces him to run
We’re at the wine house
Wwx slams down an obscene amount of money on the table (at least i think it’s obscene going off of jc’s expression and subsequent scolding about how wwx is gonna be broke BUT JOKE’S ON HIM BC WWX IS GETTING HIMSELF A SUGAR DADDY IN THE FUTURE)
Now he’s chatting up the waiter for info and we get Plot Details and an ooky-spooky story about the now deceased Chang clan
I only specify this bc the Plot Device tucked in lwj’s robes starts acting up aND CAUSING LWJ PAIN!!
NOT COOL, PLOT DEVICE, VERY NOT COOL!
Wwx is hovering all worriedly at his shoulder and mother-henning him.
The Plot Device gives LWJ a vision(!!) that sends them to the Chang clan’s residence
And we get surprise dead bodies accompanied by unholy screeching when we get there!!
Like. SO MANY dead bodies!
LWJ and WWX are Concerned!!
And that’s the end of episode 9.
This episode imo has is the best fight scene of the show. There’s more dramatic ones later on, but in terms of seeing wwx and lwj battle together in a not-ridiculously-over-the-top fashion? This one wins hands down! Gold Star to my boys!!
Return to Masterpost
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So, I woke up this morning after an incredibly vivid dream about being on the set of LazyTown.
The only difference was that it was real and not a set at all and the town existed with all it’s inhabitants.
Allow me to set the scene here. Buckle up. It’s wild!
I was out at my ballet class, however it was being held in a multi-stoey mall for some unknown reason. We had the place almost all to ourselves, as it was after shopping hours and we were working on balance and precision jumping... Which involved jumping from one storey to one below from balconies. Yikes!
It was then my mother and her partner had finished whatever it was that they were doing and said they would be out at the car when I was ready. I showed some of what we were doing and the jumping from one level to the other freaked her out and so she dashed off from nerves.
After class was over, I went out to the car. Strangely, I couldn’t find it where it once was and I tried calling them, but there was no answer. I ended up getting my brother to pock me up and we went back to their house to see if they’d just gone home (Which wasn’t their house, it was my childhood home, oddly), but they weren’t there at all.
We then suspected something had happened and I ended up getting a phone call from some random guy telling me his group had kidnapped them and wanted a ransom.
So, off on a quest it was! I dressed in my stanza outfit (Think badass superhero dressing motage haha) and my brother drove me to a specific spot where I could get to the place on foot and I ended up in LazyTown by mistake. I instantly recognised it and it felt like seeing an old friend after years of absence. It made me feel both warm and sad at the same time.
(This is where it gets pretty funky.)
I walked around and came across what I knew for sure was the town hall. I could see something was going on, as there were banners up and suddenly the Mayor wandered around the corner of the street and all but leaped out of his skin when he saw me. I was happy to see him and asked about what the banner was for. He shrugged and replied; “Oh, it’s a welcome banner... For the nuts who are visiting town.”
I was surprised, but nodded. “Oh? What nuts?” I was expecting some troublemakers.
He pointed to inside the town hall and I saw, through the double doors, two peanuts on the ground.
I chuckled to myself and continued walking on after he had assured me if I needed any help he’d offer it. It was then I bumped into the kids with Bessie and they reacted in a similar way to what Milford had. Again, it felt like meeting old friends after being away for so long. I gave a wave and told them what I was doing and then a blur of blue backflipped its way into the area.
Sportacus was extremely distracted by the ‘visiting nuts’ and was explaining to everyone that there was a problem in the celebration plans, as the nuts had ended up splitting up after a row in their hotel room. The kids kept trying to get him to look at me and he kept talking about the nuts until one of them physically turned his head. He reacted in a similar open-mouthed way, but came straight over and we excitedly walked circles around each other while saying hi, looking each other over. It was such a happy feeling!
(It gets weirder.)
Of course, a hug was definitely required at that point, only we accidentally rubbed ears and the hats kinda moved to the point our ears were exposed and the tips rubbed together. It felt tingly and nice and we ended up maintaining the hug longer than we probably should have.
After parting from the hug, we began to wander off from the group and I started to talk to him about things that were going on. As we walked we came across a suspicious looking tent. It large (About the size of a truck trailer) and was purple. I knew instantly who owned it and couldn’t contain my excitement. It felt like nothing in real life had happened to take Stefan away like it had and Robbie was still going strong as a character. It was magic, but after waking up very bittersweet.
I had to dive on into the tent and say hi. Sportacus was hesitant that I go in, but I did anyway. The tent was very reminiscent of a fortune teller’s tent and I suspected that he was readying a disguise as one and fell asleep midway through, as I saw a lump under a large amount of blankets snoring away. Of course, I HAD to give him a good poke on the bum and he woke up flailing wildly, so I started hurrying out. He ended up jumping to his feet and stalking after me cursing under his breath and it felt like I was ‘home again’. I was dancing around stuff trying to avoid him as he tried to 'get me'.
Sadly, it was then I woke up feeling both extremely happy and inspired, yet also a little sad at the same time... It felt so good to be Stanza again.
THIS HAS BEEN A STANZA DREAM PRODUCTION
[ K A Z O O F A N F A R E ]
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Can you do a one shot of Tom at the club with y/n and seeing her dance and like get downnn on the dance floor and he gets turned on by her ??
> it’s thirstday! send in thirsty thoughts and/or concepts
Tom was standing at the bar. A cold bottle of beer in his hand as he leaned against the wooden counter. The beat of the music pumping in his heart and head. Together with the alcohol, he had already consumed over the night, the feeling was exhilarating.
Harrison slapped him on the shoulder, making Tom look at his friend. He had to pry his eyes away from the beauty he had spotted on the dancefloor. her body moving so smoothly and more intoxicatingly than whatever drink he would have that night.
“Mate, what’s up with you?” His friend said as he saw the glazy look in Tom’s eyes.
“Nothing.” Tom shook his head to get back into the conversation he was having but not even ten seconds later his eyes found her again. He was lost.
“Okay, fuck it. Just go over to her and dance. Don’t stand here and stare like a freak.” Harrison ordered two shots. He handed one to two and downed the other one himself. Tom tilted his head back and swallowed the bitter liquid in one quick move. He let Harrison push him away from the bar into the crowd of dancing bodies.
He did his best walking in a straight line, making sure not to lose her out of his sight. Finally, he got through the crowd to the middle of the dancefloor. The neon lights reflecting in her shimmery black dress with every move she made. Her hips swaying from side to side. Her hand brushing through her hair. She had closed her eyes to escape from the business of the room, to get lost in the music that filled her, but she opened them when she felt a light touch on her shoulder.
A handsome stranger stood in front of her. His words weren’t clear as the music overpowered any other sound but from the hunger in his eyes and the way his tongue ran over his lower lip at the end of his sentence she could figure out his intentions.
With a little sly smile, she didn’t answer. Just took his hand and placed it on her waist. With a little spin, she pressed her back against his chest. His arm now holding on to her middle tightly as he lead her body. The music might have been too fast for the tempo they were keeping up but it didn’t matter. At the moment, they were in their own little world. Not to be disturbed by anyone or anything.
She could feel his breath on her neck. Sending shivers up her spine and down to her core. She held on to his hand that was still placed firmly on her hip. The other one moving up to tangle in his soft hair. The vibration that followed against her neck, telling her it made the stranger groan in pleasure.
Tom pressed her closer to him. His whole body was hot and from the way she leaned her head sideways and pushed her hair to one side to give him access to her smooth skin, told him she was feeling the same way.
He thought about the next morning tabloids, front covers covered with pictures of him in this compromising position. He thought about it and realized that he did not care. All he cared about is her touch.
And so, tantalizingly slow, he pressed his lips on her shoulder. Her grip on his hair got rougher. She pulled as he left kisses on her skin, moving up to her neck.
With another swift move, she turned around to face him. Their chests pressed tightly against one another. There was a moment of hesitation in both of them, where they stared into each other’s eyes. His moved down to look at her lips. Covered in a beautiful shade of dark lipstick. The image of the pigment leaving stains all over his body made his head spin.
If it was spinning then, it did a backflip when she pulled at his hair and pressed her lips on his. lustful and hungry for passion. His grip on her side deepened as he dug his fingers into her dress. Wishing that it could be hare bare hip that he was touching and not the velvet material of her dress.
They pulled away, both gasping for air. Their middles grinding against each other as they both bucked their hips at the same time, wishing for more contact.
He leaned in to ask her: “So, your place or mine?”
She smiled before nipping at his skin and responding: “How about the bathroom stall?”
tagging: @thequeensardine @tomhollanders2013 @andwhatdostarsdobest @spider-el @summernykole @social-holland @badhollandfluff @tomhollandvibes @sebastianstanfoundmymixtape @anxieteandbiscuits @thelazypangolin @tomhollandeu @peterrrparkour @theamazingspiderlingg @butwhyduh @claryfray101 @sleepwalkingdragon @yikes-buckybarnes @parkeroffline @caitlinf653 @euphoricholland @bwiannawebelo @smexymelanie @sleepybesson @spiderrrling @maefisher2003 @allywienie @yourlifeuniverse @allthedifferentfandoms @scarletteclipze @twostardusts @musiclover1263 @awkwardfangirl2014
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The Dead Mask Caper
This is an RP-turned-story I did with @sandiegosquadrp as my blog @rymccrimmon10. in it, an alternate version of Ryan is their Carmen’s Player.
"Heya Princess how's it going this morning?" Player shouted. Carmen jolted awake with a start.
“HUH?! WHAT?!” She looked around her hotel room and settled back down, grabbing her phone.
"Carmen, you didn't sleep in did you?" Player inquired.
“W... what are you talking about?” She mumbled, grabbing her phone. “Am I late for something?”
"No, but you'd probably like to know I just hacked into a security camera and saw a young woman with white hair. And we both know we know only one person like that." Carmen groaned.
“I don’t want to get out of bed for a stupid ass furry...” She complained.
"You will when I say she's heading for...The Portland Art Museum."
“Uuuuggghhhh...” Carmen whined. “Why?”
"Y'know, the place where art of the Day of The Dead is displayed? I only assume if she doesn't steal something from the showing on the Day of The Dead, it's something from one of the other exhibits. Sorry Red, no sleeping in today."
“I know, I know...” Carmen said. She groggily got up and began to get ready for the day. “Call Zach and Ivy and tell them to meet me here.”
"No prob." Player switched over to his line to Zach and Ivy. "Yo twins, Tigress is on the move. Carmen needs you at the hotel."
“Right-io! Ivy wake up!” Zach shouts into the receiver.
“Uuugghhh!!! I don’t wanna fight no dumb ass furry!!” Ivy complained.
”Carmen said the same thing, but it's the Portland Art Museum. She could be stealing something from the Day of The Dead showcase." A few minutes later, Carmen and the Twins met at the hotel.
“Aw!” Zach complains. “What about breakfast?”
"Typical." Player scoffed.
“No time for breakfast, Zach. But, I do know that I’m getting a bagel later. But, right now, we gotta move.” Carmen says.
"Focus Z, food's the least of your concerns right now." Player added. "It's Carmen and Ivy you should be worrying about."
“Aw, but my tummy hurts...” Zach says.
“Whatever, Zach-Attack! You heard the boss! Let’s get movin’!” Ivy barks. They all head out the door. It’s the middle of the day in Florida, and it’s HOT. Ivy and Zach are dying on the walk over. “Cahmeh, how ain’t you DYIN’ of heat stroke?!” Ivy said.
“I guess the heat makes me feel energized,” Carmen said, tipping her hat. “Now come on.”
"Careful Red." Player warned. "I know you're probably sick of me saying that but we all know how Tigress operates."
“Relax, I got it. Any clue where she is now?”
"Looking now.” Player told her. “Ngh, either the museum's gotten smart or she jammed the security cameras. either way, you're unfortunately stuck going in blind."
“Works for me. After I’m done kicking her ass, I’m getting a nap in,” Carmen boasts, smiling. Smiles are rare in her line of work.
“Uh... boss?” Ivy says.
“Si?” Carmen replied.
“We’ve got a Mime, 12:00 o clock.” Carmen glances upward.
“There he is.” She hissed. “The furry’s little errand boy.”
”I’ll work on the cameras while you take care of him." Player assured them. It looked like Mime Bomb went out of sight while they were talking.
“Twins, split up, get inside.” Carmen instructed. “Looks like our friends in there are going to try to work in plain sight.” The Twins nodded and went in opposite directions while Carmen walked into the museum.
"Got it." Player said as the camera feed blipped . "Looks like I could be right. She's going in the Day of The Dead showcase. But take it easy Red, I can't tell if she's just passing through to another exhibit."
“I can’t just attack her either. It’s crowded in here,” Carmen observed. There were people everywhere. “I wonder what she plan to-“ Carmen stops, having spotted Tigress. She was wearing a trench coat and seemed to be loitering around the back entrance. “What is she up to? Waiting for Mime Bomb or something?”
"SHITE!" Player hissed. "She's not stealing anything thing, it's Mime Bomb!" Carmen was surprised to hear her buddy swear, even if it wasn’t really a swearword.
“What do you mean?” She asks.
"She's just waiting for him to pass the....whatever! Maybe...I don't know. Better find out Red." Carmen realizes what he means.
“I think I got it. Give me a second, I’m going to swipe it when he comes by.” As if on cue, Mime Bomb approaches. He does a little bow to her, which looks a bit dorky. Carmen bites her lip. “What is he hiding?” Her question is answered when he gives her a mask. Carmen reaches for it from her hiding spot, but she misses. She can’t risk getting seen. Tigress takes it.
“Thank you. I’m sure you can get back to your post now?” Tigress says to Mime Bomb, who begins to make all sorts of miming motions. Tigress giggles.
“Hold on a minute are they flirting right now?” Carmen whispers, in awe.
"Gross." Player stated.
“Aww...” Carmen cooed. But then she snapped back to attention once she realized Tigress was leaving with the mask!
"Focus Carmen!" Player whisper-shouted. "She's heading towards an emergency exit!"
“I know I know!” She whisper shouted back. She darted frantically back to the outside. “Ugh! Where did she go?”
“Boss!” Ivy shouted, from somewhere to the side. “We’ve got company!”
Carmen turned and... oh shit! It was Virus!
“Hehe. You didn’t think we wouldn’t take extra precautions with you around, did you?” Virus said, and with a loud CRACK!! her electric arm activated.
“Nope! I just was hoping you wouldn’t be here!” Carmen said as she backflipped out of the way. On top of the building, she could see Tigress getting away.
"Damn it!" Player swore, hitting a fist against his table. "Carmen, you'd better think of something!"
"Wait a minute!" He snapped his fingers. "Any police copters around?"
"Or anything related to the police."
“Uh, kind of preoccupied!” Carmen said, trying and struggling to keep Virus’s claw away from her.
“Don’t worry, Boss!” The Twins shouted. They jumped on Virus and pulled her off of Carmen, allowing her to escape. She sprinted after Tigress.
“Doesn’t look like it, Player,” Carmen panted.
"Ngh, I was hoping to send a signal to warn them about Tigress to a police car, but the station itself will have to do." Player stated. "Keep her in your sights for as long as you can while I rig up a code for the message."
“Good. Great. Gun wielding air heads,” Carmen said grouchily.
"At least it's something to maybe throw her off!" Player retorted.
“Ugh fine!” She began to run over the roofs of buildings, chasing the Tiger girl.
“Hey! Betcha can’t catch me!” Tigress yelled.
“How much you wanna bet?!” Carmen screamed back. “I say 100 bucks! Cuz I’m gonna get you!” Player scrambled to get the code up and running. Carmen quickly tackled Tigress and they fought over the mask. Carmen won. She starts to sprint away until Zach and Ivy pulls up in a car.
"Phew." Player sighed. "Thanks Z, didn't want to actually send the message if I could avoid it. You know how Carmen is with cops.” Carmen suddenly started breathing heavily and sweating.
“Oh god not now...” she whines, as the heat takes over her.
“Boss?!” Ivy and Zach said with worry.
"She's fainting!" Player assumed. "GUN IT ZACH!" He screamed. Ivy gives Carmen some water, or at least attempts to while Zach NYOOMS the car.
"I swear it's that coat." Player scoffs. Carmen fell asleep, as Player can hear from her steadied breathing. Soon, night falls, and they are out of Florida, skull mask in hand.
"Carmen!? Carmen, you okay?" Player was trying to get her to speak. Carmen slowly awoke. “Hm... You have a... lovely voice...” That threw everyone for a loop.
“She’s higher than a seagull!” Ivy exclaimed.
“Speaking of, Mime Bomb and Tigress were flirting before she took off." Player said in disgust.
“What? Why?” Zach said.
“Aw! That’s cute, but not what we’re worrying about here,” Ivy interjected.
"Carmen, focus!" Player cried.
“Wha... what happened?” Carmen said, groggily. “Ugh, my head hurts...”
“Give ‘er water, Zach!” Ivy said.
"And now!” Player added. Carmen practically downed the whole gallon of water when Zach gave it to her.
“Yikes." Player said, hearing it all.
“What happened? Did we get the mask?” Carmen asked.
“Yeah! It’s here!” Zach said.
"What was that?" Player asked. "I think you flirted with me."
“... What?” Carmen asked.
"You said I 'had a lovely voice'." Ivy snorted.
“It’s true, ya did!”
“What?!” Carmen said, a blush flying to her face. “I did not!”
"It's okay, you were delirious." Player said. "You probably heard Crackle or something, who knows."
“Yeah, probably...” Carmen said, shifting. The Twins glanced at each other.
“OH MY GOD YOU WERE THINKING ABOUT HIM!!!” Ivy screamed.
“N-no! I wasn’t! I would never think of Player that way!” Carmen says, now desperate to defend herself.
"What?" He shook his head. "Guys leave her alone." Ivy and Zach are laugh and cheer loudly as they leave the room. Carmen is now pouting. “I can’t believe them... thinking I was trying to flirt with you...” She grumbles.
"To be fair, it did seem that way.” Player noted. “I was trying to get you to think straight after all."
“Well, I don’t have any feelings for you. You’re like, what 16?” She realized that was incorrect. It’s been 3 years since she first met him when he was 16. “Wait, you must be 18 now?”
“Yeah, I’m 18, why?" Then he thought-. “Oh my god Carmen, seriously!?””
I-I DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE THAT!!!” Carmen screamed.
"Oh, sorry." Carmen blushed deeply, her mind now racing with new possibilities. Possibilities and thoughts that disgust her.
"So....now what?” Player asked, mind still reeling. “Do we just let that go?" Carmen’s breathing was unnaturally slow.
“I... I’m uncomfortable...” She has always been so good at telling him how she was feeling. But, now it felt.... well, she didn’t know. Her face was burning and she wanted to cry, just a little.
"Should I clock out for the night?" Player inquired cautiously.
“You don’t have to if you don’t want to...” Carmen says. Her voice sounds... shaky. Not like her. Player didn’t like it.
“I feel like you need to be left alone." He said.
”Do I...?” Carmen asked.
"You sound like it." Player noted.
“I’m… I’m sorry... I... didn’t mean to yell or any of those other things...”
"I know." Player stated. He looked at his map screen blankly, trying to think of something to change the topic to. "Hey, did you know blood isn't actually red? It's clear, it's just that the red cells make it look red." He knew it wasn't a good fact, but he was desperate to distract Carmen.
“Heh... did you know that red is my favorite color?” Carmen asked. Her stomach hurt. She hadn’t eaten all day.
"Huh, remind me to wear my red t-shirt if we ever have to meet in person." Player quipped. Realizing something, he spoke again. "For once Zach was right to complain about food. You should eat something."
“Actually, I’m tough so I don’t get hungry...” Her stomach rumbled. She wanted to curse herself for it.
"C'mon Carmen, we've known each other for a long time." Player stated. "I've kinda learned how to read you.”
“Have you...?” Carmen said, through grit teeth and rubbing her stomach. It suddenly hurt to move.
"CARMEN!?" Player yelled. “Something's wrong!" There is no answer for a few seconds. Then...
“I’m fine I’m fine!”
"ZACH, IVY, GET IN THERE! SOMETHING'S UP WITH CARMEN!" Player wasn't buying it. The Twins rush in and they’re trying to shovel food in their mouths.
“What?!” Zach screams with a mouthful of peanut butter. Carmen looked at the nice bagel Ivy was holding and her mouth watered.
“I’m... I’m fine! Don’t worry, guys.” She was a bad liar to her friends at the best of times, but especially now that Player had deducted what happened.
"Carmen hasn't eaten anything." Player said. "Force-feed her if you have to."
“Oh, really?” Ivy said, a mischievous look on her face. Carmen’s eyes went wide and she shot up.
“NO! That’s not happening again!” She screamed.
"Then eat!" Player insisted. Carmen looked like a kicked puppy.
“You heard the man, “Princess”,” Ivy teases, mocking Player’s voice.
"Hey, I thought we agreed only I get to call her that! Wait...Shut up!" Player realized too late how what he said could be taken out of context. Zach handed Carmen a plate and dumped food on it. Carmen was visibly grumpy. Ivy was snickering.
“Eat up, pretty Princess,” Ivy teased.
“Stop or I’ll chop out your tongue,” Carmen growled.
"Maybe for me Red?" Player asked. Ivy and Zach both laughed loudly as they left the room.
“If she calls me a “Pretty Princess” again, we’re going to have an issue,” Carmen said, before taking a bite out of a everything bagel.
"Yeah, only I get that right.” Player said defensively. “Wait...no...not like that." He flushed with embarassment Carmen finds herself grinning.
“You do. You have that right.”
"Stop it, I can't explain how I know, but you're grinning." Player grumbled.
“Why wouldn’t I be? You’re still here.”Carmen told him.
"Thanks?" Player didn't know how to respond. Carmen sighed and continued eating. She started to feel less pain in her stomach "Maybe I should've listened to Zach for once and let you eat.” Player said guiltily. “I feel like this is my fault for rushing you into the job. Well, you did, but I enforced it." Carmen felt herself flinch.
“No. It was my decision, Player. It wasn’t your fault. I’m glad, because if we hadn’t left at that time, Tigress would have gotten away. And who knows what Virus would have done to those poor people?”
”What about that new recruit?" Player asked abruptly.
“What new recruit?” Carmen asked.
"Biohazard, remember?" Player clarified. Carmen breathed a little awkwardly.
"You okay?" Player asked.
“Yeah... Yeah, I’m fine.” Carmen insisted.
"That's what you said about being hungry." Player teased.
“Christine Greater isn’t with VILE anymore, Player.” Carmen told him. “I think you know that.”
"Carmen, you do realize I meant the new recruit for us right? She helped us when you first met her in Austrailia?" Carmen’s eyes went wide.
“Oh... oh! I’m sorry, I... I’m not thinking straight tonight...” She muttered
"Clearly.”Player stated. "Okay, I'm gonna clock out. I'll let you and/or the twins know if something comes up."
“Wait! Player!” Carmen cried.
"Huh?" Player had just had just been about to turn his computer off when she’d shouted.
”C-can you... stay? Just until I go to sleep... please?”
"Huh. Never asked me to do that before." Player stated.
“Is it odd?” Carmen asked, uncharacteristically worried.
"No, just...unusual." Player mused.
“So... is that a yes?” Carmen asked tentatively.
"It's not a no." Player said. Carmen sighs and lays down in bed. She gets comfy under the covers.
"Need a lullaby?" Player joked, struggling not to laugh. "Sorry, I couldn't help it."
“Do you sing?” Carmen asks, after a few seconds of silence.
"Well, I made up a song, but I'm not sure I'm good." Player had answered without thinking. "Wait, what?" He realized what he said.
“You’ll never know if you don’t try,” Carmen giggles.
“All I have on hand is my ukulele." Player said. "My real guitar's in the other room. Do you mind? I think the ukulele's more soothing in this case anyway."
“Of course not,” Carmen says sleepily.
"In that case..." Player picked it up and started playing. "Well she sneaks around the world from Kiev to Carolina, she's a sticky-fingered filcher from Berlin down to Belize! She'll take you for a ride on a slow boat to China! Tell me where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? Steal their Seoul in South Korea, make Antarctica cry Uncle! From the Red Sea to Greenland they'll be singing the blues! Well they never Arkansas her steal the Mekong from the jungle Tell me where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? She go from Nashville to Norway, Bonaire to Zimbabwe, Chicago to Czechoslovakia and back! Well she'll ransack Pakistan and run a scam in Scandinavia, then she'll stick 'em up Down Under and go pick-pocket Perth! She put the Miss in misdemeanor when she stole the beans from Lima. Tell me where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? Oh tell me where in the world is, oh tell me where can she be? Ooh, Botswana to Thailand, Milan via Amsterdam Mali to Bali, Ohio, Oahu!” A pause, then-. “Well she glides around the globe and she'll flimflam every nation! She's a double-dealing diva with a taste for thievery! Her itinerary's loaded up with moving violations! Tell me where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? Oh, tell me where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?" Player stopped. "That's the first time I've ever sang for anyone." Carmen was smiling like a dork and small tears fell down her face. “You... you should pitch that and make it big.”
"Only if you buy my albums...or steal them." The last part was a joke of course. Carmen smiled wider than she has in a while.
“You should sing more.” She insisted
"That was the only one I got.” Player admitted. “Anything already written you like?"
“Well... do you know “Pretty Lies” by Written By Wolves? I like that one.”
"I'll try. I don't mean to brag, but these fingers aren't just good on a keyboard." Carmen blushes, but she knows what he meant.
“G-go for it then...” Player did.
“I’ve been starting to accept that, maybe this is all there is and dreams that I've held in my head. Should be forgotten just forget…That you thought you were bound for greatness; rock and roll could be a savior. Keep that to yourself and just fit in. Don't stand out or they'll destroy you…Words are sharp and filed with poison. Every step that you take forward, they'll pull you back a thousand more. So give up your imagination. Take the pill it's just sedation. Be a member of society..That's not worth living for. I won't be afraid anymore. Like a thief in the night, armed with their pretty lies…they will haunt you, consume you. But you can't let them win, Let the fear be your friend. Let it guide you, fulfill you. Like a thief in the night, armed with their pretty lies…They will haunt you, consume you…But you can't let them win. Let the fear be your friend. Let it guide you…Fulfill you. You close your eyes and dreams start racing…Feels so real that you can taste it, See the crowd and all their faces. Hear them screaming out your name and wish this was more than a vision, you could break out of this prison! Taking back control defiantly. Feel the fear and let it guide you. Let the fire burn inside you. Think of all that they've denied you, Remember and use the drive you've always had but buried deeper. You give up they get what they want; Don't let them win. Like a thief in the night, armed with their pretty lies They will haunt you, Consume you. But you can't let them win. Let the fear be your friend; Let it guide you, Fulfill you. Like a thief in the night. Armed with their pretty lies. They will haunt you, Consume you…But you can't let them win. Let the fear be your friend. Let it guide you, Fulfill you…I’m sick of all their pretty lies, They sparkle like a blade. But I will make damn sure that I will not die wondering What could have been…I’ll take nothing to the grave! That's not worth living for…I won't be afraid anymore! Like a thief in the night, Armed with their pretty lies. They will haunt you..Consume you. But you can't let them win. Let the fear be your friend. Let it guide you, Fulfill you. Like a thief in the night. Armed with their pretty lies..They will haunt you..Consume you…But you can't let them win. Let the fear be your friend…Let it guide you…Fulfill you." Player smirked when he finished. "Of course you like it. It mentions a thief." Carmen was fast asleep. He can tell from her heart rate and breathing. "'Night Carmen." Player sighed, content. He put down his ukulele and went to get ready for bed.
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I read "Sultan Suleyman I. und seine Frauen" S. Woronzow-Daschkow. And I wonder how true his judgment about Gulfem-Khatun is? About the fact that she is his relative?
Firstly, I thought the author was a woman because the name is Salomé, so...
In any case, some of the sources she chose kind of worry me:
Natalia von Anrep: Mahidevran, Leipzig 2016 - this book is a literal cancer for Ottoman storiography. The things this woman assume.... yikes
Cagatay Ulusoy: Haremden Mektuplar, Istanbul 1956 - Ulusoy?? The historian is called Mustafa Çağatay Uluçay. Ulusoy is the actor
While the beginning of the reasoning seemed interesting to me:
“In the current Turkish chronicles, including Yilmaz Öztuna's masterpiece Devletler ve Hanedanlar series, Gülfem Hatun is listed among the wives and concubines of Suleyman I. However, it is not clearly proven that Gülfem Hatun was a wife or concubine of Suleyman’s. Sultan Bayezid II also had a wife named Gülfem, who continued to live in the sultan's palace after her husband's death. It is likely that Bayezid’s widow enjoyed a high reputation in Suleyman’s harem as step-grandmother, making her one of the most powerful women in the palace.”
I mean the premise is interesting and all but where is the evidence that this Gülfem was Bayezid II’s concubine Gülfem?
“Gülfem Hatun wrote in 1512 to her stepson Selim after his enthronement a significant letter in which she congratulated him on his coronation. Had Gülfem been a wife or concubine of Suleyman, she should never have written such a letter. It can also be assumed that Gülfem Hatun was a relative of Suleyman's mother Hafsa. For after the death or rather murder of her husband she did not go to Constantinople with the other women of Bayezid, but settled in the palace of the princes of Saruhan, where Hafsa resided with her son Suleyman.“
Again... where is the evidence that the Gülfem in Manisa is the same Gülfem that wrote Selim I a letter of congratulations? Moreover, where is the evidence that she was therefore a relative of Hafsa’s? Just because she allegedly went to Manisa?
And here, things get... yikes:
“A family relationship is confirmed not only by this development, but also by the fact that both women were Albanians.“
well, that seals it then. As we all know, in Albania there were only TWO women in the whole country at the end of the XV century so they cannot not be related.
The source is - naturally - Natalia von Anrep, whom I would really like to meet because the numerous backflips she does to justify a completely different family tree for Suleyman are truly astonishing. Like, she needs to be studied.
“In some sources, the birth mother of Selim I is called the Princess Ayşe of Dulkadir, who died in 1505. But it is more likely that the Albanian princess Gülbahar Hatice was the birth mother of Selim I.”
This woman lists Leslie Peirce’s book The Imperial Harem among the sources but still says this kind of bullshit? “Recent research has shown that Gülfem was born in 1492 as a princess of the Kastrioti dynasty and married Sultan Bayezid II in 1507”? No??? No research has shown this, no. Natalia Von Anrep is not “recent research has shown”
So... no. When she started linking everyone to noble houses she lost all my respect.
Also, the names of Suleyman’s other concubines.... Mükrime, Meleksima, Merziban... and his children? All those princesses who reached adulthood without anyone mentioning them? Please.
Fatma (1520 – 1572)
Hafiza (1521 – um 1560)
Raziye (1525 – 1556)
Hatice (ca. 1555 – nach 1575)
Schahihuban (ca. 1560 – um 1595)
No. No. No
In the sources of the Turkish version of this article - which is slightly different and shorter - she included a lot of archives but then she doesn’t say which info comes from which of her sources... and since she’s claiming revolutionary stuff, it is a shame because no one can check what she wrote.
If you have printed this article, shred it.
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Pretty-Rage & Kamen Haida: Part 2
*some time later, Haida wakes up, in a small house, looking out to rice fields*
Haida: GAH! What the-?! ...wha…
Retsuko: You’re up! Finally! *hands him a bowl of rice* Here you go. Eat up!
Haida: *grabs the bowl* What the-...how did you find this?
Retsuko: Well, let’s just say you were lucky where you crashed. A farmer found us, and brought us over here to recover. Turns out he had a bunch of rice that was almost ready at the time of the food being taken away, so he hid it, in case they were to try to steal it.
Haida: Oh. *starts eating* ...needs some sauce, but it’ll do.
Retsuko: Hey, don’t complain! I’ve been starving for something all day. *eating like an animal*
Haida: Hehe, oh, I know, don’t worry…*looks off to the fields, into the forest, and mountains* …..heh.
Retsuko: What’s wrong?
Haida: Ah, just wondering how we’ve survived as long as we have.
Retsuko: ...what do you mean?
Haida: I mean...I dunno, it always feels like every time we seem to legitimately send the Bryriam back a bit, they always come back, full force, and we have to start over. And every time, it always seems like they’re stronger than ever before. Like, where does it end? Will we finally have the upper hand, or will they win? I want to protect the Earth...for you. For Ikari. For Fenneko. For everyone….but I’m starting to feel like that will quickly become pointless. Especially with this recent dude, their plan straight up knocked us out! It could’ve gotten us killed! How the hell do you jump back from that?! I...I don’t know. *continues eating*
Retsuko: ...well, you know how I jump back?
Retsuko: I see you do it.
Retsuko: It’s gonna be a little weird to explain, but...remember, when I was pregnant with Ikari? At that time, crime fighting...that wasn’t something I could keep doing at that time. So, you and I agreed you would do all of that, while I stayed back, and I would get back into it once Ikari was born.
Haida: Well, yeah. That was kind of a given. It came as a little bit of a shock to me when you came back, almost as soon as he was delivered. I would’ve figured you’d need a little extra time.
Retsuko: You know why I came back as soon as I did? Because you put up with fighting them off for nine long months. You had to go through that alone. You fought them neck and neck, and you were occasionally on the brink of near death...but every night, you came home, you crawled in bed with me, and asked me how my day went, treating it as just another day at work. Even when you were a bloodied mess, and we had to tend to your injuries, you kept it up. You wouldn’t stop for a single second, and...there’s something to admire about that, Haida….you remember when we first brought home Ikari?
Haida: Y-yeah. It was at night. He was so tired, we just laid him in his cradle, and let him sleep.
Retsuko: And you remember what we talked about afterwards?
Haida: Um….I kind of forgot.
Retsuko: Well, we said that now that we have a baby, our responsibilities are piled on more. The game has been changed slightly. We have to work harder. We first just fought evil for the safety of the Earth. But now, we don’t just fight for that. We fight, so that our son can have a bright future. So that he doesn’t have to live under the iron fist of the Byriam. I don’t know how much more we will be able to take of them, Haida. I really don’t. But as long as we’re still here, we’re still able to give hope to the people, I’m not gonna stop fighting them, and I hope you don’t either.
Haida: *smiles* I won’t.
Retsuko: *smiles back* Good. *suddenly, her phone rings, and she answers* Hello?
Fenneko: Hey, Retsy! You guys alright? Saw the nasty crash you two took.
Retsuko: How did-
Fenneko: Cameras. Remember?
Retsuko: Ah, right. Anyways, we’re fine. How’s Ikari?
Fenneko: He’s A-Okay, found some water to give him, to hold him over. Though, he might need to be changed soon. Ignoring that, though, um...any chance you guys are coming back to town? Because I’m preeeeetty certain the Byriam has taken the city hostage. *overseeing a large crowd of people, surrounding Phoenixia, Kuishinbō, and the Cronion soldiers*
Phoenixia: *distant* PEOPLE OF TOKYO! WE WILL GIVE YOU BACK YOUR FOOD SUPPLY! HOWEVER, IN ORDER FOR THIS TO OCCUR, YOU MUST GIVE COMPLETE AND TOTAL SURRENDER TO THE BYRIAM EMPIRE!
Fenneko: ...as you can see, kinda need to hurry your asses over here.
Retsuko: Oh! Uh, we’ll be heading over there now! Thanks! *hangs up* Come on! Phoenixia’s got the city wrapped around her finger!
Haida: Yikes! Right! *they get up, and run towards their motorcycle, with an elderly man waiting for them*
Retsuko: Thank you so much for your help! *the two mount the motorcycle*
Old man: No worries! Now get back to Tokyo! And don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me.
Haida: Thank you, sir. *they drive off*
Civilian: P-please! Just let us eat! We’ve been wasting away all day!
Phoenixia: What did I tell you? You surrender to the Byriam Empire, and you will receive your nutrients. Until then, you will starve. KUISHINBŌ! Chow down!
Kuishinbō: Yes, ma’am! *grabs out a giant play of food, to the dismayed wails of the crowd, and opens his mouth* YOOOO-
???: HOLD IT! *the monster stops, as he, and everyone else, turns to see Kamen Haida and Pretty-Rage, driving up to the commotion!*
Phoenixia: WHAT?! They’re back?!
Kamen Haida: Better than ever! *they stop the motorcycle, and jump into the action* *to the civilians* Everyone, head out, we’ll take care of this!
*the people begin running away, as the Cronion soldiers charge at the two for battle!*
Kamen Haida: Ready!
*the two begin their battle with the Cronions*
Pretty-Rage: Heyah! *roundhouse kicks some soldiers, who fall to the ground*
Cronion: *squeals, as it tries to wack her with a staff...only to be blocked with her microphone, and blasted out of the way!*
Kamen Haida: *punches one Cronion in the face multiple times, kicks a few others, backflips onto one, jumps off of that soldier, and then jump kicks another!*
Phoenixia: Ugh! That does it! KUISHINBŌ! GO!
Kuishinbō: Yes, ma’am! *jumps into action* YOOOOOOO!!!! *slashes the two!*
Kamen Haida: GAH! *they step back, but keep fighting the monster!*
Pretty-Rage: *tries blasting Kuishinbō with her mic!* Take that!
Kuishinbō: *deflects the blast!* Hohohoho! Nice try, but you can’t stop me! *opens his mouth, to reveal a giant beam* KUIARASHIMASU! *blasts it at the two, who are sent flying back a bit!*
Kamen Haida: AAAH!
Pretty-Rage: AAAH! *they fall to the ground* Crap! What do we do?!
Kamen Haida: I-I don’t know!
Kuishinbō: *walks up to them* This was fun! But this, alas, is the end! *unleashes his sword, aiming to strike them!* YOOO-*suddenly gets blasted by several laser shots from the sky!* OW! Wha?!
Phoenixia: *looks up* What?!
Pretty-Rage and Kamen Haida: *they both look up* Huh?!
*up on top, they see a lone figure, in robotic armor, and helmet, somewhat resembling that of an astronaut, with a laser gun in it’s hand*
Pretty-Rage: Who...who’s that?
Phoenixia: Identify yourself!
Being: *jumps down, and starts walking towards Kuishinbō* My name is Cosmotaro. You are members of the Byriam Empire, who have tried many times to terrorize, and conquer this beautiful planet. For that, you will be punished.
Kuishinbō: Ooooo, you’re taking precious time away from my lunch! *raises his sword in the charges for an attack* YOOOOOOO! *suddenly gets stopped by a grab of his arm by Cosmotaro* Huh?
Cosmotaro: *punches Kuishinbō in the gut, sending him flying across the street!* Pathetic.
Kamen Haida: *gets up, along with Pretty-Rage* H-hey! Thanks!
Cosmotaro: Spare the thanks, we need to eliminate this being. *aims his gun at Kuishinbō, and starts firing!*
Kuishinbō: AGH! OW!
Pretty-Rage: *grabbing her mic* ...here goes! *goes into death metal mode!* METAL ROOOOOAAAAAAARRRRRR!!!!! *the might of her scream makes a beam that fires at the monster!*
Kamen Haida: Keep them firing! *charges at the monster, and jumps into the air* HAIDAAAAA KIIIIICK! *jump kicks Kuishinbō straight in the face, and does a backflip off of him!*
Kuishinbō: I NEVER GOT TO EEEEEAAAAAT!!!! *falls to the ground, and explodes!*
Phoenixia: Oh, no, you don’t! *uses her hands, in a waving motion* BRYIAM….GROW!
*suddenly, Kuishinbō returns, as a giant!*
Pretty-Rage: Oh no! What are we going to do?!
Kamen Haida: The only thing we can do.
Pretty-Rage: Wha…..oh, come on, Haida, you KNOW I don’t like him doing this!
Kamen Haida: Well, what else do we have?
Pretty-Rage: Well…..uh…..*sigh* fine. *grabs her phone* Fenneko, you there?
Fenneko: *setting Ikari down, on the rooftop of a building* Ready to go. *hands Ikari a small device* Alrighty, buddy, get to work.
Ikari: Bah! *holds the device up to the sky, which causes it to light up!*
*suddenly, in a blinding flash, the small infant has disappeared, and in his place, a giant alien-like being stands tall, against the giant kabuki-like monster….it is….Kyodaikari!*
Kuishinbō: YOOOO! *the two get into fighting stances...before charging, and tackling one another!*
Kyodaikari: GEYAH! DAH! *kicking, and chopping Kuishinbō*
Kuishinbō: *kicks Kyodaikari in the gut, pushing him back, into a building! ...the building’s empty, don’t worry* You will not get away with this! *opens his mouth once more!* KUIARASHIMASUUUUUUUU!!!!!! *fires a beam at the giant hero!*
Kyodaikari: *uses his arms to form a poses, which emits a beam from his elbow* GEAH! *the two beams clash, causing the earth to shake!*
Kuishinbō: YOU CANNOT BEAT ME!
Kyodaikari: GYREAAAAH! *eventually, his beam begins to win out, and he overcomes Kuishinbō’s strength, and blasts the monster!*
Kuishinbō: AAAAGH! *falls to the ground* YYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! *explodes!*
Phoenixia: DAMN! *to the heroes* This is far from the end! *disappears along with the Cronions*
Pretty-Rage: *sighs* Man, you’d think we would be getting close to stopping her by now.
Kamen Haida: Such is the struggle…*sees Cosmotaro leaving* Hey! Thanks for the help! ...who are you, anyway?
Cosmotaro: ...whoever I am is irrelevant.
Pretty-Rage: Well, considering you helped us, it would be nice to know your name, make a new friend.
Cosmotaro: Let’s get something clear. We are not friends in the battlefield. You do know me when we’re civilians, and we do get along. But as this, neither of you are my friends. We are merely on the side of justice. Nothing more. *walks away*
Kamen Haida: *starts to storm towards him* Listen here, you bastar-! *he’s stopped by Pretty-Rage* H-huh? Retsuko!
Pretty-Rage: Haida, just...let him go. It’s not worth getting mad over. We won, that’s all that matters.
Kamen Haida: ……*sigh* Alright, fine. *to the giant Kyodaikari* You can turn back, buddy, you’re done!
Kyodaikari: GEH! *turns back into the small child, Ikari, running to his parents*
Pretty-Rage: *crouching down* Come to mommy, sweetie!
Ikari: *jumps into her arms* Mama! :D
Kamen Haida: Hehe..c’mon, let’s get back to work, before anyone notices we’re gone.
*a short time later, they’re all back in the office, eating lunch, like nothing ever happened*
Retsuko: *chowing down* So, yeah! Another job well done, I think!
Haida: Yeah. And thank goodness, huh? Now people aren’t gonna be miserable all around here.
Fenneko: In this building? Nah, they still are.
Haida: You know what I mean….I’m still wondering who that guy was.
Retsuko: Hmm? Oh, that Cosmo...something, dude?
Haida: Cosmotaro, I think was his name.
Retsuko: Ah...well, I’m not gonna worry about it. If he wants to act that way, that’s his choice. But who knows? Maybe he’ll warm up more.
Haida: Provided we see him again. *sees Resasuke walking up to their table* Hey, Space Cadet! What’s up?
Resasuke: Hey, is the coffee machine working again?
Retsuko: I think so, Resasuke. All the food and beverages went back to everyone, once that monster was destroyed.
Resasuke: ...there was a monster?
Fenneko: Aaaaand of course he missed it. :3
Haida: In any case, it should be fine. If not, lemme know, I’ll go take a look at it.
Resasuke: Thanks. *walks off*
Fenneko: ...honestly, Retsuko, I’m still figuring out how the hell you saw anything in him.
Retsuko: Hey, he’s not a bad guy! Just...not my type.
Haida: Lucky me, then. ;)
Resasuke: *walks over to the coffee machine...and suddenly pulls out a familiar looking laser gun* ….. *in his memory, as...Cosmotaro* You do know me when we’re civilians, and we do get along. But as this, neither of you are my friends. We are merely on the side of justice. Nothing more. ……*he looks at Retsuko and Haida* ….*sigh* maybe soon.
*some time later…*
Retsuko: *talking with Washimi on the phone* And then Ikari did his whole giant superhero thing, and beat the guy until he exploded! It was insane!
Washimi: Wow! Well, that’s wonderful to hear, Retsuko. It’s good to see you’re using your abilities for us Earthlings. You’ve got quite the team now, it seems like!
Retsuko: Yeah. It’s getting tough, but we’re always getting tougher.
Washimi: *chuckles* I bet. Well, listen, I have to go. Gori and I have something planned, and we mustn't be late.
Retsuko: Okay! Talk to you later!
Washimi: Bye. *hangs up, and sees Gori, glaring at her* …..what?
Gori: ...when do you plan on telling her?
Washimi: ...soon enough.
Gori: Well, when you do, try not to be as cruel as you can be with that secret.
Washimi: Gori, you’re my friend, I care about you, but you do not understa-
Gori: I don’t understand? Nuh-uh, YOU don’t understand. You may think you can keep this up, and still be her friend, but one of these days, you’re gonna drive her away...like you drove me away. *walks off*
Washimi: Gori, I-! ….ugh. *receives a call* Hello?
???: Come on down. They’re expecting you.
Washimi: ...on my way. *hangs up, gets up, walks away from her desk...and teleports to a dark, dank, cave-like place, surrounded by tons of alien like individuals, having herself suddenly turned into a familiar looking being…*
The Evil Ruler of the Empire, KAIZER: PHOENIXIA! You have failed once again to get even Japan to fall to our whim!
Second-In-Command DENDO: *a buff, seemingly more militaristic brute* Hmph. Typical, of a weakling such as yourself, Phoenixia.
Phoenixia: Shut it, Dendo! My lord Kaizer, it won’t happen again! I promise!
Kaizer: You are beginning to test my patience, young child! We may have to send Dendo to finish the job.
Dendo: I think that would be an excellent idea, my lord. If my pure force was on the lines, instead of Phoenixia’s inane schemes, the Earthlings would not stand a chance.
Phoenixia: Earth cannot be conquered by raw strength alone. You must be able to tackle their thoughts and emotions as well, before truly breaking them.
Kaizer: Whatever the case may be, remember. This is only to help us. If we cannot acquire the Earth, we, as a species, may not be living much longer. This is only for a secure future! TO THE FUTURE OF THE BYRIAM!
Everyone in the room: TO THE FUTURE OF THE BYRIAM!
Kaizer: Dismissed! *everyone starts scattering around, going to wherever*
Phoenixia: *looking over Earth* …
Dendo: *walking up to her* Just remember something, I will be the one to bring that planet to it’s knees. So you better treat me with some respect very soon. Who knows? I might even let your precious friends live, once I win. *laughs, and walks away*
Phoenixia: …*sigh* Retsuko, I pray that we will never have to confront to the death. But if that day comes, I will not hold back. I will stand my ground. For my empire, for my people. Like how you stand for yours… *leaves*
“Wow, part 1 sure was big, eh?”
He says, as part two is even bigger.
But yeah, FINALLY got this done! I’m pretty proud of this whole thing, honestly. It was a great way to let off some steam. Will I ever come back to it? I dunno, maybe. It might be fun. But until then, I’ve got bigger fish to fry....oh, and yes, Kyodaikari is supposed to be an Ultraman send-up.
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you asked for it // 1, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 12, 15, 20, 23, 25, 28, 31, 32, 33, 43, 45, 49, 52, 53, 55, 58, 59, 61, 69uwu, 76, 81, 92, 93, 95 // THOT
oof hey ily
1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?
coffee mugs :>
4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?
“quiet, sweet, hardworking, intelligent” or some variation of. maybe ‘loud’ or ‘outgoing~ (aka loud)’ to like 2 of them if i got comfortable enough. i was a teacher’s pet with no deeper personality until like sophomore year of high school lmao
5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?
i don’t drink mucho soda but when i do the glass bottles 100% for the ~aesthetic~
6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?
tomboY i love the wild grass-in-your-hair ripped-jeans-from-playing-rough Look can we bring it back. it’s a mood
7. earbuds or headphones?
8. movies or tv shows?
movies for sure
12. name of your favorite playlist?
‘zoomin’ bc it’s full of them Tunes for Long Drives. it is. however. in desperate need of updating
15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?
The Things We Carried….,, i think. i can’t remember every book i read rip
20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?
the click clackety clack machinE. i type so much faster than I write and it’s easier for me to keep up with everything digitized
23. strange habits?
i twirl my hair- but not, like, just slightly twisting it around a finger. no, i wrap it around my fingertip and wind it and knot up a few strands with one hand then let it go and feel the ridges of the strands as i unwind it. and i’ve done it since i was a lil baby. p Advanced Moves
also when i was younger i (and as i type this now i see the obsessive-compulsive aspect to it yikes) i just… had to do things in fours. tapping, breathing, chewing, especially walking- four steps on the sidewalk pieces, and if i stepped on a crack i had to step on another with the other foot exactly the same way or my feet would feel uneven. i do it a bit now but it’s nowhere near as intense as it was in like 3-5th grade
25. first song you remember hearing?
Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond
28. five songs to describe you?
1. saturday nights // khalid
2. no plan // hozier
3. summertime love // flatland cavalry
4. epilogue // la la land
5. weight in gold // gallant
31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?
i wear a t shirt and leggings 8 days of the week and have never kicked ass in my life but like. optimistically, that.
32. top five favorite vines?
the “run.” umbrella vine
“there’s only one thing worse than a rapist… boom.” “a child.” “NO-”
the one where the radio’s playing “baby it’s you, you’re the one i want, you’re the one i need” and the guy gets… progressively… more hilarious
anything by sarah schauer
and that poor cup song guy those always cracked me up
33. most used phrase in your phone?
43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?
where is my sweatshirt option this is blatant patagonia erasure… hoodie tho
45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?
they are all the Best. however. fantasy
49. what saying or quote do you live by?
i have a Wall of quotes pal but the current closest one is “let the small things bring you joy”
52. favorite font?
sdlfkjslk uH? currently calibri/verdana. i like the ones that are. like. legible but Distinct aka not times new roman but not calligraphic
53. what is the current state of your hands?
i just got my rinG so my right hand is B L I N G E D O U T but like. a nice white manicure. also a tiny burn mark on the second knuckle of my right middle finger from a baking pan and a permanent callous on my left ring finger + indentation of my left pointer finger from how i hold a pen while writing
55. favorite fairy tale?
hmm. i never read? old ones? Grimm or not, sooo Tangled tbQh
58. four talents you’re proud of having?
i can read music/kind of play a piano… i can braid hair :>> uhHhHh i can cook pretty well? i’m no expert but things can turn out pretty decent, aaaaannnnd i’m pretty darn technologically literate. if you have a mac i can probs help you lol
59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?
i would have five predetermined phrases and “oof,” “yikes,” and “oh, bet” would be three of them
61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?
Kit’s monologue in Unicorn Store? yeah that
69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?
Cleopatra lived closer to the invention of the iPhone than she did the building of the pyramids and this knowledge shakes me to my core. shit is OLD
76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?
uh. bayke potaytoe
81. fireflies or lightning bugs?
92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?
depends on the time of day,, ,,,,, sunlight or fairy lights probably
abbs, abigail, certified pharmabitch, Lightweight Champion
95. favorite app on your phone?
omfg okay so i’m a sucker for the games u used to play when u were like 12-13 and bored out of your mind so like. literally this one called Flip Trickster i’m like a fuckin. mouse on a wheel i LOVE playing that game i’ll waste hours on it. you’re literally just making this mannequin do backflips off various surfaces and hit a target and it is 100% my enrichment item
WOW okay that’s lots once again ily ((thot)). send me asks PaLs :>
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Episode 1 - The Mortal Cup
(spoiler warning, obvi)
The trio just backflipped off a roof without falling on top of someone -- that’s impressive
Clary: Hey, can you watch where you’re going? Jace: You can see me?
I would’ve been like, “Yeah, dude, dial down the arrogance.”
omg Clary had a rune on the cover of her sketchbook--did not even notice that the first time
ok, maybe i did.
i seriously just spent way too much time trying to pause the shot so i could get a good look at the rune and then they freaking show it up close
it’s irazte btw
yikes, the interviewers are assholes
Clary--oblivious as ever lol
Luke you’re so serious damn
Clary’s outfits are always on point
A PAPERWEIGHT LMAO
thanks for the bday gift, mom 😂
So Jocelyn was only hiding this from Clary until she was 18. That’s kind of a plot hole in the books. Like was she going to try to hide this stuff from Clary as an adult?
Wait...who’s Elijah again?
And why can’t i remember what happens to Maureen? Doesn’t Simon just sleep with her and then bail?
Alec, as impatient as always
Jace: Demons dig blondes. Isabelle [to Alec]: Told you. Alec: It’s platinum. (Alec is me lmao)
ok they see a pic of the demon they’re looking for while they’re still at the Institute, but in the first scene the demon shape shifts like 3 times in less than a minute. By the time they find the guy on the streets, he could’ve changed 10 times by then
unpopular opinion: I hate when Simon sings
ok so the “band” is just Simon and Maureen...
Why was Isabelle covered head to toe when walking in the club when you can’t even see any of her runes, but you can see Jace’s and his arms are uncovered?
Dot, why would you use your powers to pick up a weapon instead of just blasting the Circle members?
Holy crap, I know Dot is a warlock but how is she not dead??
If i hadn’t read the books and seen the show already, I would be SO confused right now
Luke! I love him
Circle member: Listen to me *points finger at Luke* Luke: *slaps hand away* No you listen to me: Get out of my office 🤣
It’s just pouring down rain all of the sudden
I never understood the Chernobyl thing like why of all places?
Valentine looks exactly like this guy I work with. It’s bizarre
whoa that is a bad way to die
NGL, kinda crying for Clary a little bit
Clary “I wield battle axes all the time" Fray
If i were Clary i would be freaking out that someone is asking me about a fucking cup instead of telling me what happened to my mom
wow Jace, you’re awfully handsy with Clary for having just met her
Alec: I have to report this to the Clave. Jace: you know what? Dial it down a notch. Isabelle: my brother doesn’t have a dial. (Just wait for Magnus lol)
Simon: Is he your meth dealer?? (lmao)
Does being a Shadowhunter protect Valentine and the others from radiation poisoning?
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“what can you do, where can ya go, when your mama is a burnout, and your daddy is a pyro?”
Do you have your ears pierced more than once? Yeah.
Do you use an electric toothbrush? Yes.
When was the last time you changed in front of someone? Oh, I have no idea. That's something I avoid like the plague because I loathe my body.
When was the last time you got high? Never.
Do you get along with your parents? Yeah.
How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now? None.
Have you ever used a Ouija board? No, I don't fuck with that stuff.
Have you ever met anyone who claimed to be a witch? Yes.
Do you go along with prank-callers, or just hang up? I don't answer numbers I don't recognize to begin with.
Would you ever tattoo a lover’s name onto your body? Nooooo.
Do you own any version of Guitar Hero? I have a lot of 'em.
Do you use mouthwash every single day? No.
Do you know anyone with asthma? Yeah, my mom.
Have you ever walked through a forest at night on your own? Uh, no sir.
When was the last time you were in a graveyard? It's been many, many years.
Do you know what an ‘AMV’ is? Yep, used to make 'em.
How many items are in your recycle bin? (On your computer!) Oh yikes, probably loads. I haven't emptied it in... I don't know how long.
Would you rather be a bird or a fish? A bird.
What’s one award show you have to watch every year? None.
Who do you like more: the Batman or the Joker? Joker. Heath Ledger's is my favorite.
Have you ever had a pet rock? No.
How much do you weigh? Yeah, no.
If you are outside, what are you most likely doing? Taking nature photographs.
Have you ever lost your luggage at an airport? No.
Have you ever been on a rollercoaster that actually scared you? I don’t do roller coasters to begin with.
Have you ever gone in a sauna? Ugh, hell no.
Has a stray dog ever tried to bite you? No.
Have you ever had an eating disorder? No.
Are you attracted to people outside of your race? Yes.
Are you in love with anyone at the moment? No.
Have you ever dated someone more than once? No.
Best cough drop? Those creamy strawberry ones.
If you have a pet, does it make a lot of noise? One's a snake, so she's silent as could be. My cat is generally quiet, but he has his times where he just walks around meowing, normally for attention.
Are you a fan of eyeshadow? If I actually wear makeup, yeah, I like black eyeshadow.
Can you tell the difference between Coke and Pepsi? Absolutely. I don't like Pepsi.
Would you feel funny if you kissed somebody of the same sex? Done it before, didn't feel weird.
Besides furniture, what’s the biggest thing in your bedroom? A Silent Hill poster.
Which of your friends makes you laugh the hardest? Girt.
Have you ever been in a Catholic confessional? Yeah, as a kid.
What color was the hair of the last person you kissed? Brown.
What was the title of the last song you listened to? So today I've really been digging dark synthwave/cyberpunk-ish music, and right now I have a playlist on that's currently playing "DNA War" by Absolute Valentine and Billy Mays.
How far away is the closest Walmart? Not even five minutes.
Can you do a backflip? No.
Who is the lead singer of your favorite band? Well, Ozzy is the lead singer of Ozzy Osbourne, haha.
When was the last time you went fishing? Not since Sara visited and we went catfishing with my dad one night.
What brand of deodorant do you use? Secret.
Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Yes.
Do you regret it? Nah.
Who was the last person to buy you a drink? My mom, lmaoooo.
Who was the last person to buy you dinner? Also my mom, haha.
How old is the oldest person you’ve dated? Juan's maybe like... 28 or something by now, idk.
Have you ever run a stoplight? No.
Have you ever dated someone & then dated their sibling? YIKES, no. That sounds miles beyond awkward.
Are both your parents still living? Yeah, thankfully.
What’s something that makes you feel more creative? Music, for sure.
Do you collect Mason jars to use for crafts? No, but I do find those super cute.
What gives you a quality of life? Not much nowadays, idk.
What would give you a high quality of life? A sense of purpose, direction, and worth.
Do you have any rugs on top of carpet in your home? We have a big one in our living room, yes. I don't get it.
Do you have a mattress cover on your bed? Yeah.
Do you hate taking naps during the day? No; naps are normal for me.
Who has the best personality on YouTube? Maybe I'm biased, but I genuinely do think Mark for a multitude of reasons. He's just extremely likable imo and sincerely a fucking spectacular human being.
Do you have any vinyl records? No, but I would love to collect classic rock and metal ones.
Which serial killer(s) do you find most fascinating? I'm quite honestly not well-informed in serial killer stories. I think they're interesting, but not enough for me to learn about them.
Have you ever visited any celebrity gravesites? No.
How do you feel about archaeology? It's fuckin dope.
Any animals whose behaviors you find particularly interesting? ALL OF THEM AHHHH!!!!! But I particularly love learning about social animals, like meerkats (mongoose in general, really), African wild dogs, wolves, etc.
What are your thoughts on gun control? I don't support the idea of banning firearms altogether, but I am very much in favor of some reform. There needs to be a much, much more strict and complex system in order for you to legally own a gun, and I also support periodic "check ups" to ensure you still fit whatever criteria is laid out. "Bad people will still find guns;" yes, some most certaintly will, but you can't convince me that the numbers wouldn't decrease. It would take a serious villain to put so much effort into pursuing obtaining a firearm.
Do you like animals better than most humans? Sure do.
Have you ever had to block people online for harassing you? I've blocked people to prevent that.
If you collect anything, what is your favorite piece of that collection? I cherish the plush meerkat Jason gave me most, probably; out of my Silent Hill stuff, the limited edition Revelation flyer I have in Japanese.
Are you friends with anybody you didn’t like at first? Hi, meet my best friend lmao.
Are there any musicians you didn’t like at first, but grew on you? Probably.
Do you have any favorite books you’d like to have signed by the author? Not really. Well wait, Ozzy signing my copy of his autobiography would be pretty damn cool.
Do you like any board games or card games? I'm not really a board game fan, but Magic: The Gathering is fun as far as card games go.
What historical figure(s) are you most interested in? I'm not incredibly interested in any, but I do think Pharaoh Hatshepsut was a bad bitch. She was one of the extremely few female pharaohs, and if my memory serves me right, one of the most successful.
Do you like Breaking Benjamin? I sure do.
How many people of the opposite sex have you told you loved them? One.
Have you ever had to change your phone number? Yes, because I was getting strange texts from numbers I didn't know.
Have you ever played bingo at an actual bingo hall? No.
What’s your favourite comic book/graphic novel? I don’t read any.
What is something you take pride in? How far I've come as far as my mental illnesses go, particularly depression and PTSD.
What’s the biggest magnet on your fridge? I'm not getting up to go look.
Have you ever eaten a Big Mac? No; I hate lettuce on burgers, so.
What brand is your vaccuum cleaner? Dunno.
Do you believe in sex before marriage? Sure, but I don't believe it's a must for everyone. Plenty of people don't even want to get married. Be intimate once you're comfortable with the person, and be safe and smart about it.
Are you for or against abortion? I'm pro-choice.
Do you feel like you need to lose weight? It's fact that I need to. My body just doesn't want to, afuckingpparently. All I seem to be capable of is either maintain or gain nowadays.
Is summer your favorite season? It's my least favorite, actually.
Do you wear glasses? I'm basically blind without 'em.
Can you say the alphabet in more than one language? Yeah, in German.
What do you want out of life? To feel like I made a difference, even if it's a small one.
Do you ever get carsick? No.
Do you groom your eyebrows? Not really anymore, no.
Have you ever liked someone who treated you badly? No.
When was the last time you went in the car past midnight? Oh boy, probably not since I had my cyst in I think '16. I was in so much agony and we had no painkillers, so I had to wake up Mom to go to Walmart to grab some. They barely even helped at all. God, I couldn't imagine dealing with that again.
Were your last two kisses with the same person? Yes.
Do you have alcohol in your house? I don't think we do right now, no.
Do you have any personal fashion rules that revolve around your own preferences/body type (e.g., you never/always wear a certain color, sleeve type, or length of dress)? Yeah; I don't wear anything that shows my legs unless I shaved, but I will never wear a dress that isn't at least past my knees.
Do you remember any celebrity whose style you admired when you were a teen? What do you think of that style now? Avril Lavigne was/is an ICON. I still think she looks badass.
So, is it gif with a hard G or soft G? I used to say the opposite, but I say "gif" now. Apparently that's how the creator of the term says it anyway.
When you are invited to things like wedding showers or baby showers do you tend to go or skip? What about graduation parties? If Mom is able to take me, I'll try to go to the first two if they're my closer friends.
Do you like spicy chips? Oh FUCK yes.
What’s the last movie you watched at a friend’s house? Elf with Sara's fam.
Can you remember your parents’ birthdays? Mom's, yes. Dad's, only the month.
Do you read your friends' surveys? Yep, I love learning about them.
Do you know anyone with a glass eye? Not to my knowledge, no.
Do you ever use the n-word? Absolutely not.
What piercing do you like most on the opposite sex? I tend to like lip piercings.
Do you prefer beef, chicken or steak? Chicken.
Ever spent the night in a tent? Yeah, multiple times as a kid, "camping" in the yard with Dad, haha.
What do you call your grandparents? I called both sets just "Grammy" and "Grampa."
Have you ever cried while reading a book? Oh, certainly.
How many college degrees do you want? I got none, and I'm not going back to college.
Do you know how to play pool? What about foosball? Yes.
Have you ever attended a professional sporting event? Yeah, hockey with my dad a few times.
Do you own any jerseys? No.
Were you born with naturally straight teeth? No; that's why I had braces.
If you were the opposite gender, what name would you like to be called? Maybe like... Victor. Idk.
Do you prefer original or sour Skittles? I love both, but sour.
Do you like bacon bits on your salad? Yeah.
What is your favorite kind of soup? I'm not a soup person.
Did you learn to type through a computer program for kids? Yeah.
What do you take for pain? Advil/Ibuprofen.
What is your favorite place that you’ve lived? My pre-teen and teenage years house: in the woods on a dead-end road and down a gravel path that everyone always missed when learning where our house was. The actual road itself had very, very little traffic, and there was a large expanse of cotton fields. I loved it and miss the house itself, but it's got a lot of bad memories rotting in it.
Who are your favorite kids that you’ve babysat? My niece and nephew. <3
Who is your favorite cousin? I don't have a favorite. We barely interact at all.
Does one side of your family live in another state? Literally none of my extended family (or half-siblings) live in NC.
What states did your parents grow up in? New York and Ohio.
Have you ever had an allergic reaction to an insect? No.
Is there a good hospital where you live? God no. It is notoriously awful.
When was the last time you were asked out? Did you accept or decline? Mid-2017. I aceepted.
Does your job allow piercings or tattoos? N/A
Do you want to get married? If so, what color will your dress be? Yeah. Probably white/ivory or black.
Ever had a caricature done of yourself? How much was it, and were you satisfied with it? No.
Do you like peanut butter and fluff sandwiches? No, I don't like the texture.
If you got married and then got divorced, would you want to re-marry? Probably not.
What’s your favorite amusement park? I haven't been to nearly enough to know.
Do you play video games? If so, what kind? Yeah. My favorite are horror games, but I also love me some story-driven survival games like The Last of Us, and then there's "kids" games like Spyro, etc. I like a looot of different kinds.
Would you buy used clothes? I don't think so. I know it's easy to wash clothes and stuff, I'd just still feel kinda... grossed out by it.
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yikes i just got into tanas vids time to backflip out, what else has she done if you cam tell me?
said the n-word a bunch in the past, lied about it, fired her assistant for messing up her clothes (i think) and then immediately went on younow to rant about it and brag that she was paying her assistant SO MUCH MONEY. the funniest thing is that she accidentally slipped up and said “she wanted thirty bucks, cause it’d taken three hours” like sis... 10 bucks an hour lol yeah really living the high life.
she told idubbz to kill himself, and... idk i don’t like idubbz but i express that by talking with my friends about it and not telling him to kill himself
uhhhh all of tanacon also. dunno if that’s her being a bad person, probably just really poor planning.
like her if you wanna, i’m not gonna go after you for liking who you like, but she’s super hypocritical
uhhh if you want more info you can look her up, i’m by no means an expert, i was just sifting through old old drama videos and it came up
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STOP MAKING TERRA THE BAD GUY, AQUA STANS
I hate even dipping my toes into the Kingdom Hearts fandom, because for some reason, this site snuggles the poorly-written female characters (Kairi, Xion, etc.) and plotlines and practically deifies the more well-written ones (Aqua even more than Namine). But the worst are the Terr*qua fans. I mean, so many people like this pairing, and yet even those who do like it also like to make Terra seem like the failure of the two.
Specifically, the two must overcome the damage between them caused by Terra.
By the way, my bitterness and anger over this got long.
First, they give Aqua a free pass for spying on Terra. As if that’s okay. As if she’s right to do so. Let me tell you: spying on a loved one is never okay. Are your parents spying on you? Doubt you’d think that’s okay. Your boyfriend or girlfriend? Beyond not okay! But Aqua spying on Terra? Perfectly acceptable, for some reason. And Terra getting angry about it? “He could have handled it better.” An actual quote from a Terr*qua fan. An actual quote.
By the way, Ven was “insulting her” when he called her awful for spying on Terra. To these people Ven was a bad guy in this situation. My brain can’t even wrap itself around this. Ven, the child of pure light, calling Aqua’s spying awful. Was the rude one. (Someone even mentioned him calling her awful and said “yikes.” WHAT.)
And please. Please. Any of these Aqua stans. Go ahead and find a single instance of Aqua saying something nice about Terra to Terra’s face. Go ahead.
Because there isn’t one.
Every time Aqua stands in front of Terra, she degrades him. She calls him a failure, says she’s heard of the awful stuff he’s done, says he’ll fail to defeat the darkness. Not once does she show him she has any sort of faith in him.
Oh, and when not talking to Terra? She still shows no faith in who he is.
All she shows faith in is her belief that he’ll become who she wants him to be. The only time we get something nice from her is when she agrees with Eraqus to spy on Terra and bring him back should he start to fall to darkness. She says, and I quote, “Only this time, he’ll show you he has what it takes to be a Master. He’s not as weak as you think.” How nice. Only she just promised to spy on him and bring him back, so...? Where’s the faith in him there, exactly?
As for practically every other time in the game, save the short moment she defends Terra to Ven in Enchanted Dominion? Ew. Just ew. Don’t believe me? Let’s look at some of these quotes.
Sounds kinda nice, right? He’ll be all right. He won’t give in to it. He’ll find a way to become better than he is. It may be there, but he’ll overcome. Sounds nice... until you realize it’s on the expectation that he change, that he suppress or deny that part of himself. Then it starts sounding a little... ew.
I actually have two problems with this one. One: Terra asked her to convey his thanks, but instead Aqua makes it about her and does not pass his words along. Two: her “thanks for teaching Terra he needs to keep believing.” Thanks for teaching Terra something I, Aqua, already knew, and he needed to learn. Thanks for helping him start to change.” Again, it may seem nice until you realize she’s still thinking he isn’t good enough as he is.
This continues ad nauseum, because Aqua has taken everything Eraqus says and believes to heart, and she doesn’t question it. Ever. So when Terra, who is so good he gets tricked easier than Ven, fails due to “being unable to control his darkness,” she thinks in Eraqus’ terms, that Terra needs to get rid of said darkness and tamp it down. He must get rid of a part of who he is. She and Eraqus both teach Terra that who he is isn’t good enough if there’s darkness in him.
Do you know who never does that? Who always accepts Terra, darkness and all, and loves him simply for who he is, no questions asked? VENTUS. Only Ventus. And unfortunately, everyone’s too busy trying to put him in a protective bubble to listen. And yes, I include Terra in that list. But let’s move on.
We then get Aqua defending Terra to Ven, which is great! I loved that reaction. But then it’s immediately followed up with her doubting, just as Ven did. Only she never stops doubting. Even though Maleficent, in her next breath, admits to knowing Xehanort, thus potentially learning of keyblades from him. And it’s not like Aqua herself doesn’t demand to know what Xehanort told Maleficent, or tell Maleficent to stop lying (another moment I loved). But no! No, it must have been because Terra really did help Maleficent out of his own free will. Which she must believe enough, or else she never would have pulled that shitty line on him in Radiant Garden. Sigh.
The sad thing is, I liked Aqua in Enchanted Dominion. Okay, so I wasn’t a fan of her “Terra, you better stay strong for me,” but that was because I was already prejudiced against her making his struggle about her, and already hated how she acted as if he wasn’t strong enough already. (Another thing that carries through her entire playthrough.) But this wasn’t bad. She’d continued believing in him... I’d thought.
But unless you want me ranting for decades, I won’t even TOUCH on Radiant Garden. Suffice it to say that she was awful and let’s move on.
No. Seriously. Spying on someone? Saying to Maleficent that you believe in him and then turning right around and throwing Maleficent’s accusations into his face? Having an accusing tone the moment he insinuates there’s something big happening and Ven needs to stay safe? Not even talking to him first? If that’s not awful to Terr*qua fans, then I just don’t know what to say. Enjoy unhealthy relationships, but don’t pretend Terra was the one in the wrong here.
Olympus Coliseum? She was happy because she thought Terra had “triumphed over the darkness,” which meant he wasn’t “spineless.” Again with him needing to become better. Again with the whole light = strong, darkness = weak; Terra must prove he’s strong enough to be good enough. (Wonder where that issue of his with strength came from? Who knows? It’s such a mystery.)
At this point, Aqua is surprised at every turn when she actually hears something nice Terra said or did. Terra fought against the darkness? Crazy! He said a friend made his Wayfinder charm? I thought him the type to drop me like a rock when I did something heinous! (Maybe he should have; what she did was pretty horrible-)
BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT SHE ACTUALLY SAID WHEN SHE HEARD TERRA SAID THE WAYFINDER WAS MADE FOR HIM BY A FRIEND:
Did she just act like he was the one who’d acted unacceptably, like he was the one who’d nearly destroyed their friendship - like he was in danger of being lost, but if he still think she’s his friend, then he’s okay??? As if, if he stopped being her friend after the stunt she pulled in Radiant Garden, he would clearly have fallen to darkness?? BY NOT BEING HER FRIEND AND ACCEPTING HER SPYING AND ACCUSATIONS?!?!?! Oh ho ho ho no, I am not okay with that. At all.
(Neverland hardly mentioned Terra at all, and I know I’m getting pithy here but if people want to jump Terra’s shit for thinking he could take on Xehanort and Vanitas by himself, then Aqua deserves the same level of fish-eye because she thinks she can beat Vanitas. In fact, she fights him twice, and both times thinks she beat him even though she didn’t even come close. Don’t talk smack about Terra without holding your female fave up to the same stark lighting.)
(I’m not sure how to take her whole “one keyblade is enough for any friendship thing,” because does she think her becoming master and not him made him fall into darkness? Because he already had darkness, or else he would’ve been made a master. And he’d never brought up any feelings of anger or jealousy over her becoming master, so...??? Where is this even coming from???)
Then we get the usual denial that Terra did something horrible, this time with her denying Yen Sid’s words that Terra killed Eraqus. But then she backflips once again and says this:
So much for not believing him capable of killing Eraqus, eh? And then, of course, she goes to the Keyblade Graveyard and once again rags on Terra to his face. Wonderful. Maybe, just maybe, Aqua stans, she’s not nearly as perfect as you make her out to be.
Look. Aqua isn’t a bad person. But her entire story was one in which she needed to learn some things. That light isn’t all good. That light can’t get rid of darkness. That love defeats darkness. She had to come to terms with her self-righteousness (though she didn’t, even at the end) and accept that what she’d been taught might have been wrong. (Something the Fairy Godmother herself started teaching her.)
Love conquering darkness. This is the thing she learns only in the Final Episode, when she goes after Terranort. Until then, she hounds Terra’s every step, saying he’s done awful things, saying he’ll fall to darkness because it’s nothing but hatred and rage and he’s bound to fall again - she shows no faith in him, no trust. Even though Cinderella taught Terra that simply having faith was enough to banish the darkness, she fails to have faith in him. Huh.
Look. Like Aqua if you want - I do, when I’m not seeing the drivel on this site. Like Terr*qua if you want, though, ugh, talk about a giant ‘no, thank you’ from me on that one. I don’t think I have a bigger NOTP in any fandom anywhere, ever. But acting as if Aqua did no wrong, that Terra was the one messing everything up, is just disgusting. Hell! Say they were both in the wrong, even though Terra, throughout the game, was being manipulated, used, and abused. Go ahead! (Even though that’s gross, too.) But Aqua isn’t perfect, and it’s about time you stans, especially you terr*qua stans, started facing that fact.
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