#ship just keep sailing

[beebundt]

just finished first playthrough of da2, thinking about some post-game ship captain isabela and her 2nd hand (and lover)

#dragon age 2 #da2 #dragon age #da #isabela #my ocs #joan hawke #femhawke #hawke #captain isabela #ever since i saw that one mod on nexus of captain isabela... chefs kiss my love goes out to that modder #also of course my joan is a purple hawke 💜 with a secret heart of gold #i throughly enjoyed this playthrough so much im still thinking about it... #my canon is that post-game hawke buys a big ass ship for isabela and they just sail the fuck anywhere they want #hawke frequently writing letters to varric to keep him updated with every last thing of course claiming it's only for his story fodder (lie) #also whatever the fuck is going on with hawke and varric? gayer than gay could be. love that for them #i imagine she of course also writes letters to merril frequently as well bc she has a soft spot for her... #also because merrill x hawke x isabela is so good. so good. #my art

[muffinlance]

Prompt: Azula joins Zuko on his Avatar hunt instead of Iroh. I don't know why, I don't know how, but I'm certain to be entertained by whatever follows.

Ozai and Ursa were already dead by the time Iroh arrived home. He stepped from his ship into the palanquin, and rode past the places of their execution, holding the urn of his son’s ashes. 

He had no time to entrust them to the Fire Sages before his father summoned him. He brought them along, because this was an easier thing than setting them down. And perhaps Lu Ten’s grandfather would like to see him once more, outside of the family shrine. Iroh would have given anything—

He placed the urn on the floor next to him. It did not kneel when he did. Fire Lord Azulon surveyed him from behind the flames.

“Rise, my son. It is good to have you home.”

They did not speak of Lu Ten. His father had always been a man to look to the flames of the future, rather than the ashes of the past.

* * *

They hanged Ursa, as befitted her attempted crime, and her past station.

They burned Ozai, as befitted his. A child of Agni should always return to the flames.

The children of the traitors had been stricken from the family line. Had been placed in the capital prison; bait for the trap. Azulon was keeping close eye on those who expressed concern for the offspring of regicides. Ozai had expected support for his position; it would be Iroh’s second task to sift through the court, and discard the chaff. 

His first task was a more practical resowing. Azulon had already selected a handful of candidates: women of suitable birth and known loyalties. The wedding date had been set, pending selection of the bride.

“Thank you, father,” Iroh said. 

Lu Ten held his silence.

* * * 

Azula had never liked the servants who’d fussed at her hair and clothes, who’d pulled and tugged until she was perfect, like perfect was a thing outside of her for others to bestow. She only had to look at Zuko to know how far tailored robes and well-oiled hair could take one.

She couldn’t see Zuzu from her cell. Her robes were too cold against the stone and every tug to wrap them tighter just made them worse, she could see it in the guards’ faces, the way they’d stared when she’d first arrived and looked a few days after and now they barely even saw. No one would talk to her, no matter her demands. They didn’t even stop their own conversations anymore; just slid in her food and kept walking and batted away her fires and it was cold here.

There were things crawling in her hair that her nails couldn’t dig out. Sometimes she thought she heard Zuzu yelling, but she couldn’t be sure. And it would have been undignified to yell back. She was a princess. She was fifth in line for the dragon throne. 

Fourth, now that Lu Ten was dead.

Third, because father was, too. 

He’d yelled and then he’d screamed and it hadn’t done anything but make the crowd jeer. Fire Lord Azulon had been silent. Poised. In control. She was his namesake and she would be too. 

She was nine.

* * *

Zuko yelled until his throat burned. The guards didn’t care, they didn’t listen to him, which was nothing new. He shouted and shouted and his own ears hurt. Maybe that’s why he never heard Azula calling back.

Grandfather had made them watch when he’d killed father and, and—

If grandfather had Azula killed, he would have made Zuko watch that, too. Azula was probably just better at being a prisoner than he was. Maybe the guards even talked to her.

He was eleven.

* * *

Iroh’s new wife was a third his age. A flower just coming to bloom. She looked like his first wife; Azulon knew his preferences. She was young enough to be Lu Ten’s sister. She smiled and laughed each day with the other court wives, and came to his room with lists of possible dissenters to discuss in their marital bed. It was not the pillow talk he was used to, but it was charming, in its way. She liked to lay on her stomach and kick her feet above her as they traced the web of treachery with his dead brother at its center. She was here to have his children—a task at which she worked with admirable diligence—and to be the acting Fire Lady. She had not had to struggle and flaunt herself for his affections; she had been picked from a line-up, her expectations realistic, her motives aligned with his. It was the least romantic relationship Iroh had ever been part of. It was… refreshing.

On the day the palace doctor confirmed their newly budded line of succession, the Fire Lord called them both in for congratulations. And for pruning.

* * *

Zuko had turned twelve, but had not realized it. Azula had turned ten. She’d counted the days.

Iroh had not been able to visit them in prison; only to inquire as to their treatment. Individual cells, regular meals of reasonable quality, no abuses. He’d moved his own people into position to ensure the last. 

Azulon had moved them back, after a delay for his soft-hearted son’s conscience. They could not waste loyal men on cuckoo-vipers. And Iroh could not waste his father’s good will. Not when it would be needed in the future, for the most important request.

* * * 

“And your wife agrees to this?” asked the Fire Lord, behind his flames. 

Iroh’s wife had not been directly addressed, and so did not reply. She sat in polite and perfect seiza, her head raised, as befitted the woman currently running her half of the court. Azulon had never seen fit to replace his own wife, after all.

“She does,” Iroh spoke for her. “We have spoken on the issue at length, and believe it best. Our family is small, and cannot afford to be smaller. The children are young; too young to have been in their parents’ confidences. With proper guidance—”

“And how would they place in the line of succession?” Azulon asked. “How would they chafe, how would they plot, with a decade’s experience over your eldest?”

Lu Ten’s own connections at court had been built while his cousins were still in diapers. But he was no longer Iroh’s eldest.

“We believe—”

“No,” his father interrupted again. “I will not allow their adoption. Not by you, where they could smother your own babe in the cradle, and certainly not by someone I trust less.”

Which was everyone, since the night his daughter-in-law had served him tea sent by his son.

“Father,” Iroh began, and his wife shifted her elbow just so, the only indication that she wished to dig it into his ribcage. “They are young, and innocent. They are my beloved nephew and niece. Your grandchildren. We cannot in good conscience—”

‘Good conscience’ had never factored into his father’s policies. Iroh had… begun to realize that, of late. His wife let out a small sigh, deliberately audible only to the man next to her. She had cautioned very strongly against a—how had she put it?—a feelings-based approach to this situation. Feelings rarely factored into her own decisions. She had been hand-selected by his father, after all. 

His wife went into a half-bow, her head lowered. “May I speak, my lord?” 

The flames crackled. The shadow of his father inclined its head, just slightly. 

“To kill the children is wise, and I admit, would set my mind at ease for my own child’s sake. But my husband feels strongly on this matter, and so I support him, for his happiness is my own. May I suggest a compromise? To place them outside the court, where they cannot build influence, nor harm your son’s heirs. A position from which you can judge their characters and value to the nation as they grow.”

“You suggest banishment,” the Fire Lord said.

“Not unstructured, of course. To leave them roaming freely would invite those that would take them in. Perhaps a military commission? As they are commoners, they should begin from a rank befitting their station, of course. Let them prove their worth on their own merit.”

Iroh could not see through the flames, but he knew his wife’s small smile was reflected on his father’s face. 

“A naval position,” the Fire Lord said. “On a ship that does not frequently make port. The frontlines would be the best place for them to prove themselves, wouldn’t you agree?”

Iroh closed his eyes.

“Father,” he said. “Please,” and he could feel his wife willing him to stop talking. The Fire Lord had already agreed to spare their lives. A banishment could be undone, so long as he and the children both outlived the man before them. “I… thank you for your wisdom in this ruling. But perhaps, if they complete some feat worthy of our line, they could be allowed to return?”

The flames were hot against his face. His new wife was still and silent against his side. His father… his father laughed, a low exhalation, the wheeze of a humorless old man.

“Let them bring me the Avatar,” Fire Lord Azulon said, “and I will welcome them home with honor.”

* * *

Zuko didn’t know why they’d pulled him from his cell or scrubbed him down or taken his old clothes. They’d been dirty but they could have been cleaned. His new clothes were scratchy, and too big, and they looked like a common soldier’s, and… and—

And they’d shaved his hair. 

* * * 

It had gotten rid of the bugs, Azula admitted, in the privacy of her own mind. Still. She memorized the faces of the woman who’d held her down and the man who’d shorn her. For future reference.

They hadn’t bothered sizing her new outfit for a child. Azula noted the quartermaster’s face, as well.

* * *

They were put on a ship. It was the first time they’d seen each other in nearly a year.

Zuzu looked at her head, and wisely said nothing.

She raised an eyebrow at his, and graciously granted him the same.

It was hard to tell them apart. They had their mother’s face. And their father’s.

* * *

Their captain’s name was Zhao. He invited them to dinner in his private quarters, once the Fire Nation was behind them. Zuko fidgeted. Azula didn’t.

The captain spoke on how much potential he saw in them, under a commander who saw their true value. 

Together, they could go far. Very far, indeed.

Azula smiled and said all the things she thought father would have said. Zuko scowled. 

Zhao brushed over their arms with his own while reaching for things. He served them more when they said they were already full. He squeezed their shoulders when he brought them back to their rooms, which were next to his, even though the rest of the lower crewmen slept together in the same big cabin. Zuko scowled harder. 

Azula was invited back. Zuko wasn’t.

* * *

Zhao was… Zhao wasn’t a good person.

“I know that, dum-dum. But do you want to stay banished forever?” 

“Uncle said—”

“Uncle’s going to change his mind, when he has his own heir and a spare. We’re threats, Zuzu. And Zhao knows father’s old friends. He’s one of the smart ones.”

The dumb ones had already been executed. 

“I… I think he wants to—to tie himself to the royal line.”

“Eww,” she said. “I’m ten. If he wants to get engaged, I’ll just break it when we’ve got the throne. It will be too late for him to retract his support, then.”

They’d barely left port before Zhao had made his first move. He didn’t seem like a man who waited. 

Azula was ten, but Zuko was twelve. Being twelve was almost thirteen, which was almost a teenager, which was almost an adult, and adults understood things that ten year olds didn’t.

They had to get off this ship. They had to go home.

Zuko had to find the Avatar.

* * *

(This ficlet is now posted on AO3.)

#are you not entertained? #eventually this one will be a Fire Lord Iroh AU #better hope he gets that throne quick <3 #Happy Ending: and then they joined the southern raiders just as Hakoda was setting sail #and Hakoda was unprepared for these feral fuzzy-headed children suddenly on his ship #Bad Ending: and then they joined the southern raiders when Zuko was sixteen and Azula was fourteen #after four years with Zhao #Zuko: *shakes Aang until he glows then yeets him at Zhao like a grenade* #Azula: that's a good first step to being my favorite brother #but I still don't have a crown in my hair Zuzu #Avatar The Last Airbender #atla #Zuko #Azula #Iroh #I actually really like Iroh's new wife? #RIP one-off OC I'll probably never use again #you are the politically climbing aro-ace rep we deserve #New Wife: sure I'll exchange my firstborn for ultimate power in my nation #wait I can keep the kid too? #sweet deal #ficlet #Cuckoo-Vipers

[amphibious-thing]

People who don’t like Lucius are wild. ‘He had sex in public’. The ship is his home. He doesn’t have a room!

#also as anachronistic as the show is this is pretty on point for age of sail #iirc men would find a spot on ship with a little bit of privacy for buggery #but otherwise just keep your clothes mostly on and hope no one tries to report you #but this is also on like navy ships #pirates may have been more open but it also could have varied ship to ship #we can only speculate #our flag means death #historical fiction #i might delete later idk

[markantonys]

day 71 of asking why reddit has suddenly become convinced that the 'finn and mat's rhuidean trip are a waste of time and easily cut, and that season 3 will obviously feature him splitting off from the friends he just reunited with in order to spend the entire season dicking around with thom and getting into shenanigans, as that is much more important to his overall character arc than his 2-book waste arc

like there have been SO MANY posts like this lately and all of them are filled with comments of universal agreement! am i having a stroke? what the hell is going on???? i'll admit mat doesn't have a huge amount of specific stuff to do in the waste aside from rhuidean, but rhuidean is crucial to his character and s2 had Mat-Finn Connection Foreshadowing out the wazoo, plus the waste plotline is MUCH more fertile ground for creating additional Specific Mat Stuff and enhancing his character development & relationships with other main characters than his TDR plotline of dicking around with thom is.

#and don't even get me started on them insisting the girls will waste half a season going back to the tower #or even that egwene's whole waste arc is pointless so she should be transported into the tower coup plotline instead #like hello????? #day 7000000001 of me being grateful reddit is not responsible for adapting the show bc most of their ideas are complete shit lmao #i think the root of the issue is that they do not understand that mat's and the girls' s2 plotlines #were amalgamations of their TGH and TDR plotlines that event-wise were mostly TGH (mostly invented in mat's case for obv reasons) #but nonetheless captured just about all the relevant emotional beats from TDR (and the few left can be added into their TSR events) #and so they keep being like 'okay so their TDR events haven't happened yet so that's gonna be happening next season' no it isn't??? #we've moved on from that my buddy that ship has sailed (bar stone of tear which i do think we'll see in a future season) #'but emily why do you care so much that other people are making bad theories' i don't KNOW it just makes me ANGRY djkfjg #they'd better release s3 promo pics of mat and egwene in the waste asap just to put all this absurdity to rest! #wot #wot book spoilers

[enbysiriusblack]

thinking about pirate captain dorcas and runaway noblewoman marlene

#marlene in a huge fancy stuart era dress with a sword she stole #and dorcas in masculine clothes with a huge tricorn hat #marlene running onto the ship as her family’s guards chase her. she holds her sword to pandora's throat #so dorcas or the other pirates cant kill her without marlene then killing pandora. which cas is not willing to risk. #after theyve set sail. dorcas captures marlene and tries to make her walk the plank. #but james and mary took a liken to her when she was in the cell and convince cas to just keep her locked up till they next make port #marlene slowly making friends with more than half the crew. #and so dorcas goes down there to see why the hell their crew is so infatuated with this girl #marlene immediately makes a joke about shagging cas' mother. #dorcas falls in love right there. #marauders era #marauders #marlene mckinnon #dorcas meadowes #dorlene #dorlene au #marauders au

[total-drama-brainrot]

i found ur "p!Noah singing "The Red Means I Love You"" idea interesting and i absolutely love the concept of Chris asking for a song and Noah just jumping to the front with the most maniac grin on his face, and nobody stops him cause they're too afraid to so they just let the guy have his solo LMAO but i have to ask, if he did sing this song, given its a song to be directed at a singular person [or multiple people, if he goes around and singles out one person at a time], who would the person he sings it to be? or would he just sing it to sing it? [imagining him forming a kick-line at some point and cackling]

See I've always had a hard time envisioning Noah willfully singing for any reason- and that applies to all Noahs- save for maybe spite, monetary compensation and/or dedication to The Bit (and even then, I really doubt canon Noah would be committed enough to a joke to 'humiliate himself' by singing). He does sing along to the compulsary songs in canon, though he's not a frequent voice amongst the regular performers.

But p!Noah is pretty much all about committing himself fully to The Bit, so he'd probably jump at the chance to have his own solo song if said solo song was something along the lines of "The Red Means I Love You", or "I Can't Decide", or anything that's gruesome/gorey enough to cause discomfort to his competitors. Bonus points if he gets to demonstrate what he's singing!

As for who he's singing to? ... I have no idea.

I'm a bit (a lot) of a multishipper, and I usually leave my AUs fairly vague when it comes to what romances it'll include (if any) unless said romance plays an integral part in the whole concept of the AU itself. In the case of the Psycho Noah AU, I haven't really put much thought into how relationships would work- let alone which ship would be 'canon' to the AU.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is; it's up to the reader themself to fill in the blanks with their preferred Noah ship!

Saying that, having Noah sing an inherently romantic (if a little violent/fucked up) song without actually dedicating it to anyone is. Really funny. Maybe he's singing to the audience themselves, as yet another way to tease/toy with them?

(And the idea of him somehow roping the others into a kickline is hilarious, though I have no idea how he'd manage it. Not that I doubt he could.)

#or you could take it in the opposite direction and have him sing something cute and nonviolent. #like the snuggle song by schnuffel bunny #gonna try to keep this AU as lighthearted as possible by Making Things Silly #no angst. no meta-analysis. just shitposty jokes and dark humour. #if you guys are really that interested in a romantic aspect though i could always run a poll for which ship to 'let sail' #total drama #td noah #psycho!noah au #replies

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

What do you think would happen when Tails introduces Sails Mangey and Nine to mints?

Oooh good question!

ㅤ

Sails:

Honestly, since we don't know all that much about No Place, I like to think that mints are still a thing, just the kind of thing that Sails has to sneak on the ship and can only get once in a while. So whenever he was able to get them before, he kind of had to ration em out.

That also being said, I think it would be funny if the mints in no place don't look like the ones Tails offers to Sails. So at first Sails hesitates to eat it, although he has no reason to distrust Tails, so he does try it. I can see Sails sort of commenting his thoughts aloud on how it tastes, but ultimately he probably tries to sneak some mints off of Tails.

Although Tails is pretty much like "You can just ask. I've got a bunch"

So whenever Sails visits from No Place he lets Tails and the others try the mints from No Place, and he uh takes a good amount of Tails' mints back to No Place with him

However, if Sails has never tried any mints before, I think he'd become hooked pretty quickly (still explain the taste out loud you know) and end up trying to snatch some before Tails is like "Hey, just ask and you can have as much as you want"

ㅤ

Mangey:

Hohoho boy

While there's at least a decent chance Mangey has just straight up eaten mint plants before, I think he would become pretty hooked as well. In my head, I think he'd keep begging for more after Tails initially gives him one to try, and it gets so out of hand that Tails, Sails, and Nine have to consciously keep mints out of sight and locked up.

But before they realize how bad Mangey gets about them, Tails gives him like a tin or a small bag of mints he can take with him, and Mangey can't even make them last a day. He is in the presence of mints, he snacks on mints.

Just cause they hide em and lock em up doesn't mean that Mangey doesn't find them or that he's never allowed to have them. I think sometimes when Sails is playing that game with Mangey where he's working on something and Mangey plays assistant, they often use mints as something in exchange for helping when they're not exhanging kisses.

ㅤ

Nine:

While we know more about New Yoke than we do about most of the other shatterspaces, like with Sails I'd like to think Nine has had mints before. In this case, since nothing really grows within the city, I like to think that occasionally New Yoke will get mints in as an import.

Essentially, I think Nine used to see the resistance handing them out once in a blue moon after a successful raid or would see them sold on shady street corners and alleyways. He always tries to limit the contact he makes with people and the city itself, but he kind of had to to be able to get the matierals to create his equipment and have enough food to survive. So he managed to get ahold of a small handful out of curiosity.

It was too much of a pain to get ahold of more, so even though he liked them quite a bit, he almost never was able to get ahold of any.

With that all being said, I can see Nine sort of marveling for a moment how easy it was for Tails to get ahold of so many mints before remembering that green hill and Tails' world is much more plentiful than the city of New Yoke. I think after trying them when Tails offers, he's reminded just how good they are.

That being said, though, I think Nine would pretend that he likes them but of course has restraint, unlike the other two. So he would only take the one small bag or tin when Tails offered to give them more mints. Other times Tails offers, I think he starts out as begrudging but does eventually accept the gift of mints whenever Tails offers some.

If Mangey eats em like candy and Sails is always taking a large stash with him, though, even though he acts like he has more self control and is more normal about mints than them, that is a lie. After taking the first bag/tin back to The Grim with him, he starts figuring out how create a constant lifetime supply of mints there. He doesn't eat them like candy when he does accomplish this, but he still does eat mints about as often as I think Tails does. That's all to say that sometimes mints are just something he eats a couple of when he's bored, when his breath smells bad, occasionally when he needs to make deals with Mangey, as a special little treat when he feels down/accomplished something, and when he hasn't eaten in a while but needs to keep working, so he needs to trick his stomach into thinking its not starving by letting mints dissolve in his mouth.

In the event Nine has never had them before though, I'd think he'd still make a visual expression of enjoying the first one he tries, but he'd still try to be modest and seem "normal" about them by only taking one tin/bag of mints before he ultimately figures out how to keep a constant stash in The Grim like Tails does in his many labs

ㅤ

Thanks for the question, anon! If you have any other questions about them or their relationship(s), feel free to shoot me another ask🥰

#tailscest #saitaininegy #sonic prime #miles tails prower #miles sails prower #miles nine prower #miles mangey prower #tails the fox #sails the fox #mangey the fox #nine the fox #sonic the hedgehog #anon interview #jansnsn in short #Mangey: Obsessed with these things #Sails: More normal about mints than Mangey‚ but does like to keep a pretty decent stash on the ship #Nine: Pretends he is incredibly normal about mints and tries to be fairly normal about them but has a stash on par with Tails so he can have #a mint whenever he so desires #i just be ramblin

[thatswhatsushesaid]

do you think.... that maybe the jgy enjoyer subset of the mdzs fandom could, perhaps.... idk..... take a break from the "which ship within 3zun is The Best ship" fandom polls. could we collectively decide to leave 3zun in peace for a while

#salty peak sect 🧂 #also i realize this is rich coming from me but there is something just deeply exhausting #about seeing *so* much xiyao ship shade in the notes of those polls #it's not pleasant and it doesn't make the people who DO ship xiyao rather than the other two all that inclined #towards being nice back. it does like. the opposite of that thing. #i try to at least keep my salt about ships i don't sail to my own posts as much as possible #and i'm trying to be more conscientious about not even alluding to a dislike of other ships in other people's posts when i reblog them #because it is seriously no fun to see a bunch of people either directly shitting on or making rather catty little asides in these posts

[sameteeth]

something that i think is really interesting about billy's view of flint in s3 is that he thinks flint's death (if it's in a self-sacrificial way) will not absolve him of his sins in life but that it will make up for the hurt he's caused. or at least that billy wants it to. he pushes flint to take the maroon queen hostage so that flint will die, but flint will die for the crew. billy says in s3e6 "with all the shit that he's done, the things he's gotten away with, [flint dying to free them from the maroons] would have been fair. that would have been right" and that he wants to see "the moment the world finally catches up to [flint]" if/when he dies dueling teach. billy has a very simple idea of justice - he wants flint to die for the death and destruction he has caused, no matter how. that will make the world right, that the narrative will be balanced again.

but what billy doesn't know, and what makes me INSANE about this show is that the full quote from billy is is "I think part of the reason I've been able to stand by his [flint's] side is that I wanted to make sure I've got a good view of the moment the world finally catches up to him... and this story starts to make sense again." but to flint, what he has done is in service of his own justice. justice for the deaths of thomas and miranda and james mcgraw, for the theft of his home in london and again his home in nassau. but to billy, HIS narrative identifies flint as the villain. as the monster. for billy to get justice, flint must die. but it's SUCH a good line, because it also prompts the viewer to think - in OUR narrative, which follows flint and silver mostly, flint must succeed. we want him to beat teach and take the fleet back and overthrow the british empire. flint is shown to be a murderer but he is also shown to be deeply deeply human and we are set up to sympathize him. but it makes you consider what other voices we aren't hearing. who else has been hurt by flint's actions? what narratives have flint as the villain ? none of the characters in black sails are the heroes in every story - but to who are they the villains?

#idk this SHOW MAN. the rewatch is going quite well. makes me INSANE #'yes yes flint is billys england weve all seen it' IT JUST MAKES ME SO RABID !!!!!!!!! #the flint billy parallels make me climb walls bro #like. flint wants freedom from a colonial monarchist rule and becomes a pirate. which were famously democratic. and yeah sure hes not NOT #elected for his position - but black sails goes out of its way to show in s1 the kinds of subterfuge going on about the voting. #flint does NOT keep his position as captain fairly until silver. and even then we arent shown the voting but silver clearly keeps his #constituents happy somehow. idk the ship politics are soooo interesting to me!!!!! #i also think theres something deeper in black sails in general about leaders/followers. in terms of like. flint proposing his plato-based #philsopher-king bullshit. and his disregard for 'the men' as people beneath him... but ALL the captains do this. there's not a single #instance of a crew member whos given much agency or who makes a bid for leadership and isnt punished (singleton dusfrene billy even) #there is only the Leaders - flint silver charles vane rackham teach - and the Followers - the variable number of walrusmen that changes #based on the ship theyre on lol - the men on the ranger and the colonial dawn #granted some of this is just due to narrative reasons i think. but in a show thats so deliberate. its worth considering. #black sails #canis watches black sails

[echthr0s]

oftentimes there will be a video or article or whatever that is giving advice about, essentially, how to show up more authentically in the world, and there will inevitably be a bit that is like "don't automatically walk into a space with the thought that you'll be rejected". which, on the surface, yeah -- makes total sense. rejection sensitivity does create a sub/conscious energy that either people pick up on and sub/consciously respond to, or just hamstrings your efforts and stifles your personality and makes you appear to not be interested at all (in which case the other party is the one feeling rejected first, so they're just responding in kind).

okay, great. but here's the thing. the idea is that you have this internal belief about yourself, that you're unloveable or undesireable or boring or whatever it is, and you're expecting that to be reinforced by other people. and what the advice is saying, is to not think that way. except... why do people tend to think that way in the first place? self-rejection is a learned behaviour.

I don't actually think I'm any of those things. I think I'm a fucking delight. but the problem is that my body -- the subconscious processes that really run the show here -- does not recognise that as a truth. my body has plenty of experiential data determining that no matter what I think about myself, other people will invariably be less charitable and far less enthusiastic about me, and will respond accordingly. it doesn't matter what I think. what matters is the evidence -- the "reality" as my body interprets it. frankly, sometimes it seems my body thinks I'm a bit of an idiot and is going "yeah, yeah, you're a delight, sure. anyway, back in the real world,"

I think people really put a lot of stock into "just change your mindset!" without incorporating the reality that there's no amount of affirmations or whatever that's going to override repeatedly being treated as if there's something wrong with you or that you're unfit for relationship. at this point, the best I can do is just be frank about this from the outset -- if you are like most people, you probably won't dig me very much. or at the very least, you'll dig me superficially, but the deep stuff will be off-putting to you. if you are not like most people, you will have to put in quite a bit of effort for me to really see and understand that. this is reality. and if that happens enough times -- more than once, that is -- then maybe my body's story will change. but there will never be a guarantee of that, and I can't expect one. beating my fists against brick walls going "but I am loveable! I do have interpersonal value!" isn't going to convince other people of that. they'll just have to come to that conclusion on their own (or not, as it were).

there's got to be a secret third thing -- not self-abandonment and self-rejection, not magically convincing my brain to somehow deny what it knows to be real, but maybe just accepting life as a complexly traumatised and very strange individual who will always be hard to know and hard to love, and that's not a flaw or a condemnation but it is a disability

#like. cptsd - developmental trauma - relational trauma - that's all disabling. i will never show up in relationships the way i ''should'' #because i can't. that ship has sailed. the more i try to deny that the worse i get #i think this is very easy to overbalance into ''so i'm never going to try ever'' which a lot of people with cptsd do (and that's valid) #but i think i'm at the ''i'm not gonna twist myself into unnatural shapes for it but i'll keep the light on for the possibility'' stage #and likewise it isn't all on me anyway. other people may also never show up in relationship the way i'd like them to #but that's got to be okay. can i live with it? if yes then live with it. is it untenable? then dissolution must occur #but it's not a blame game and there are no martyrs here. it just is what it is. #in the end... there will always be the Configuration. i DO already have the love i want. just not in *this* world. #but at least i have had the immense privilege and fortune to know and feel that deep and profound joy. #allworld's forgotten boy #singularity.txt

[tearlessrain]

"we can't explain why things don't suck in this other country" says the article that lists all the things the country did to make things not suck as if it's some kind of wizardry and not something the US could start doing at any time if anyone in power cared

#I'm still salty that they declared the pandemic over btw #don't come at me about how it's not a pandemic anymore it didn't get any less dangerous or contagious #the reaction to it not going away should have been 'let's implement changes in response to keep people as safe as we can' #not fucking 'oh well die I guess' #I frankly don't care that you want things 'back to normal' that ship sailed things change get over it and wear a stupid mask #and stop going out when you're sick just because YOU don't care if you die/gain potentially lifelong and debilitating long haul symptoms #that's your problem stop making it everyone else's

[brainworms-all-night-long]

Okay so uh, my brain is usually incapable of thinking abt fluff for some reason but after reading and later thinking a bit about @000marie198 's idea of shatterverse variants of Tails just being chaotic siblings I blacked out and hour later this apeared on my phone screen-

__________

× Nine is the Sonic of the squad when Sonic's not around, as in pestering Tails and his two associates to take apropreate breaks and abide by their bedtimes, while also making sure that no forbidden substances such as coffee or energy drinks exist in the workshop's premises

+Tails specifically is extremely annoyed by this, yet fascinated and jealous at the same time, because how can you just?? Put everything down and go to bed???? Not even letting the thought of pulling an all-nighter pass your mind????

+But make no mistake Nine is still the most moraly corrupt of the quatro so he will absolutely be the little demon on Tails's shoulder approving of every single highly deadly invention or upgrade Tails thinks of.

× Thanks to the constant exposure to technology, tools and observing Tails' gadget making, Mangey has become a master disassembler and an uncompromisable threat to everything that's not welded together or a solid slab of matierial in the first place. If he puts his mind to it and no one disturbs him, he will take apart anything you put in his little hands. Tails finds that pretty usefull safety testing. (But also potentially dangerous and annoying when you try to type in your keyboard but all of the buttons are torn out and placed in a pile right next to it like damn ok, oh shit the dawer is aflling apart ah fuck-)

+One night, Mangey discovered a stray screwdriver and the residens of the workshop were for a suprise morning when they rather quickly found out every single hinge on all of the visible doors was undone. (yes even the fridge, Nine nearly got killed by the heavy doors falling on him)

× They sometimes play chess and while Sails prided himself by saying he already knows the rules and game perfectly, without a fail, he always ends up loosing to Nine who only makes sure to rub it in his face. This applies to most table and card games.

+Mangey was trying to eat the chess pieces at first but after observing a feew games and having the rules explained he is actually pretty good at the game??? (He doesn't really know what he's doing either and sometimes a piece or two gets lost to the stomach acids when the others aren't looking but oh well, Sails can always carve out another one)

+Honestly Tails shouldn't have been expecting to have a regular table game with any of the people he knows, especially himself.

× And what ego and pride Sails looses to Nine in board and card games, he gets back in the quite frequent sparing maches he initiates. Because boi is he salty about always loosing, and will he put all that salt on his blade and swing it at Nine all day and any day he sees the edgelord isn't visibly busy or in a bad mood (latter of is suprisingly and plesantly not as often as it once used to be)

+And Nine has tried to pick up a sword multiple times but it's just doesn't mesh well at all with the fighting style he preferred and was used to with his mechanical tails, which only got in the way. He will admit swords are cool and they're even cooler when someone skilled swings them, but he will eat a Chao alive before looking Sails straight in the face and telling him that.

× Something something rock paper scissors becomes a bit of an inside joke to the quatro after Mangey shows a literal rock when they were using this very professional deciding method on "who will clean up the workshop's mess after Tails' rather ambitious last project."

+Sails and Nine protested that it should be Tails alone since he caused the whole mess in the first place, why is he dragging them into this when all they've been doing is braking swords outside and they dutifully clened that mess up each time, but than Tails hit them with the "well I'm the one and only reason any of you exist here rn and also provide a roof over your heads so you go by my rules" anyway Nine lost the rock paper scissors and he absolutely made sure everyone knew he was pissed about it.

+They use rock papers scissors to also decide who gets to spent the most time with sonic and rocks are thrown when results are not exactly favorable. (No one gets seriously hurt I promise)

#sonic prime #lord have mercy its 4am I cant keep doing this #im tired and will edit this 50 times over as usual the next day #do I know anything about sails and mangey besides some clips and general impression from their design? #no #did I write almost a thousand words talking about hypothetical shenanegans anyway #yes #would sails know chess tho #i mean ig there could be a chessboard somewhere on the ship #if not than take that as him lying and relying on the fact he'll maage to learn everything as it goes #idk nine has that older sibling being an absolute menace at board and card games #and mangey i tried my best at not just amking the neighborhoods feral doggo everyone is cool with #hes still a tails and still a little curious and a little shit #anyways #ill shut up now #and #and go shleep #yes I #i will go now #miles tails prower #miles nine prower #sails the fox #mangey the fox #damn how do u tag the rest #theyre the same person but theyre sibligs also #imagine this chaos is just a constant somewhere in Tails' brain #silly brainworms #and this is the last time im tagging somes i swear- #prime bros

[hypaalicious]

TFW you find a 30+ skin care group but every other post talmbout cosmetic procedures instead of skincare:

#dawg I just wanted to know what kinda moisturizer folks my age use 😭 #not like I’m particularly looking to switch up my lineup but #if I was less secure in myself I would be in shambles reading these posts #Botox and fillers and microneedling and surgery WHAT #I’m not trying to look like I’m 20 that ship has sailed #but it seems a lot of folks have internalized ageism where they truly wanna look 20 forever like a vampire #I just don’t want age spots or scarring or deep sun-carved wrinkles #and I wanna keep my skin from drying out #that’s about it #I have learned of so many non-issues that are just natural skin occurances ppl want to fix #and it’s kinda sad? idk

[kitausuret]

Sometimes I do wonder if, with my being a vastly powerful shipping machine, if I'm actually just subconsciously "pairing the spares" or maybe I just really, really enjoy shipping. I do think it's gotta be the latter, because it's rare that I ship characters together just to make another couple (or to not intrude on another relationship - which most of you who know me, know I would much sooner poly that shit up). Even if my only reasoning is "I think it would be funny" I still LIKE to explore it.. whether it works out or not.. whether it goes anywhere or fizzles out immediately...

I get really into character dynamics and how people interact with each other in general. I like to ponder the possibilities. I like to put characters in a shaker bottle and listen to the little metal ball mix 'em up. I guess sometimes that does end up like "you get a relationship! and you get a relationship! and YOU get a-" on and on but mostly it's just?? Fun?? It's just fun. I think it's fun.

#how to tag lmao #idk #this post brought to you by scrutinizing DTD like 'is including Parksborn just pairing the spares. #'am i just trying to keep Peter out of the symbiot3' #but lol that's definitely not the case because. one. he is in love with Harry. #and two. nothing could stop Peter from encroaching on Flash's relationship if he wanted to. #having similar minor concerns about lizbetty but lol there is zero chance of Betty getting back with Flash... #that ship has sailed and he personally sunk it #anyways #idk i feel better getting all that out #trying 2 find confidence in my writing again

[shitnpiss]

OKAY I said I wanted to make this post five months ago so it's about time that I do.

And I've seen your response @fordislavski, I misinterpreted what you said a bit, and I get the feeling that you meant... A little too well...

So that's what this is about. Shitnpiss's Stancest State of the Union. I've been wandering around the Gravity Falls fandom for the past 2 and a half years, and over that time, I've seen artists, writers, other fans come and go. This is normal, of course, but there's something I've noticed over the past year or so.

More and more often I come across a new popular GF blog, enjoying their content, feeling safe, until I see something written in their bio or pinned post:

"proship dni"

and/or

"stancest dni"

Or even worse, they don't have those in their bio or pinned post, so I'm scrolling through their blog, thinking they wouldn't hate my existence over a ship... and there it is. A post saying that they hate proshippers, stancest shippers, for them to dni, whatever.

I'm concerned. This spreading of antishipping means the fandom is becoming a more hostile place for us... and that's unfortunately exactly what they want. They want stancest and us shippers gone.

Not only have I noticed this rise in antis in the fandom, but it also seems as if there's been a decline in new stancest content and shippers (compared to previously)... but is there?

Of course there is. This incredible comic by @high-sixing for @5summersofstancest Past, Present, and Future last year puts it better than I ever could. The number of stancest shippers is so much smaller than what it was 5 years ago, a bit smaller than when I started wandering around the GF fandom, but does it really matter? The increase in antis and decrease in our numbers is scary, yeah, but we're still here. We still love these hot grunkles kissing. We still want to make more art, fanfiction, headcanons, imagines, whatever, of those hot grunkles kissing. And we're still going to, even when the stancest tag goes slow and the antis get scary.

Remember, we're still here, and we don't have to go anywhere!

Don't give up the ship!

#i went a bit hard there #im sure you understand #i am very passionate about stancest and i am not afraid to say no to whatever tries to threaten us from sailing this ship #stancest #shitnpiss stancest state of the union #to all of my fellow shippers who got this far: thank you for reading #i love you and what you bring to this wonderful ship #and dont feel like youre obligated to many any sort of content for this ship! you owe nothing! #just dont be afraid to keep shipping this ship #thats all :)