#shit my roommate says

[fouroclockwren]

“Julian is just like a rizz-less Astarion” -my roommate

#having very important discussions today #julian devorak #the arcana #astarion ancunin #bg3 #shit my roommate says #quotes

[housefriendships]

*staring out at a lake at twilight, mist rolling across the water*

hufflepuff: what would you do if we heard my voice calling for help behind us in those trees?

slytherin: what like a wendigo?

hufflepuff: yeah sure

slytherin: idk nothing? what are we going to do, make a run for it?

hufflepuff: yeah like it’s dark, I have glasses and you have asthma, we aren’t getting very far

slytherin: guarantee i’d twist my ankle too

#harry potter #hufflepride #huffleproud #hufflerin #shit hufflepuffs say #shit my friends have said #shit slytherins say #shit the houses say #slytherin #slytherpuff #shit my roommate says #hufflepuff

[shitmyapartmentdoes]

TH: doesn't WASP mean white able single parent?

#shit my roommate says #it should #wasp #th

[tiny-waving-snail]

#shit my roommate says #i couldn't breathe #he was playing that disney animal crossing game #and merlin was getting happy when he'd mine ore nodes #and my roomie busts out with this gem and nearly killed me

[little-jewish-girl]

Me- My one fear is that aliens won't want to fuck us

Roommate- What if we don't want to fuck the aliens?

Me (a horny bastard who has played the Mass Effect trilogy) - Oh I assure you we will

#mass effect #all my alien partners #mass effect 2 #mass effect 3 #shit my roommate says #little jewish girl speaks

[spinnychaircirclecasting]

me, headphones in while i study @snunkies, talking out loud to the common room: jesus is the taylor swift of headphone babble i can't make it out me, VIOLENTLY ripping out my headphones: jesusisthetaylorswiftof WHAT NOW? snunkies: jesus is the taylor swift of the past me: sinks to the floor while i process this information

PS - i almost transcribed this as "jesus is the taylor swift of the pasta"-

#spinnychaircirclecasting #diary entry #shitpost #serious shitpost #shit my roommate says

[yarnnerdally]

"Acorn oils facilitate pants decomposition."

My roommate on 3/19/2024 at 1:00pm

#shit my roommate says

[shit-my-r00mate-says]

“I’m a slut for water. Get me slippery.”

#shit my players say #shit my friends have said #shit my roommate says #lesbianism #autism

[beanghostprincess]

Law would love "House" and Sanji would love "The Bear" yes, but have you considered both of them watching Love Island together

#because i think they'd enjoy talking shit about people together #love island parties and it's sanji law nami and usopp judging people #i just think sanji would be into reality shows like REALLY emotionally invested #and nami would wonder how much they get paid for this shit and if she could make zoro go with her and cause drama #law would say he hates it but then he stays to watch the whole thing #law: how can you watch this garbage / sanji: you're watching it too / law: bc my annoying roommate is doing it and he won't let me read #law a minute later: she's such a fucking liar what the hell is wrong with her can't she see he's being HONEST OH MY GOD- #sanji: garbage you say / law: shut the fuck up #lawsan roommates au when #'and they were roommates!' and they share netflix account #one piece #trafalgar law #black leg sanji #lawsan

[the-real-list-of-ominous-threats]

I'm going to make you oversleep so that you wake up three hours after you were supposed to take the final exam for your most important class

#had a nightmare about this last night #i have 2 finals today and i dreamed that i slept through them both #(one is finished! I got an 87!) #:) #fun fact when my dad was in college this happened to his roommate #dad says that his roommate woke up at like 3 pm on finals day looked at the clock went 'oh shit' and then went right back to sleep #apparently the roommate's name was dorf #because my dad was living in a sitcom when he was my age or something

[fouroclockwren]

“I’ve gotta hydrate. Gotta keep my bones wet” -roommate

#shit my roommate says #quotes #stay hydrated

[jaqdawks]

This is Barry my Madoka Magica OC

#was watching madoka magica with my roommate and our friend #haven’t watched mm since I was like #11??? maybe #my roommate and our friend have never WATCHED it #so I know the spoilers but I forgot enough for this to be a new and enjoyable experience again almost #and they didn’t know squat #and I said ‘’yk what would help these magical girls a lot would be to go at it with the view some ppl who defuse bombs have’’ #which is if they fuck up it’s not their problem anymore (cuz they’re dead) #ofc this isn’t to fault the characters of the show. they’re 14 they’re not gonna handle this sort of shit well OBVIOUSLY #but we started joking abt a magical girl who’s just a grown man who can diffuse bombs #and here he is #everyone say hi to Barry cuz you’ll never see him again #art #doodles #madoka magica #magical girl OC #madoka magica oc #fanart #puella magi madoka magica #digital art #illustration #oc #digital doodle #digital drawing #digital aritst

[mod2amaryllis]

who else haunted by an apology you never got the chance to make???? 🤪🤪🤪

#this isn't too serious this is about my college roommate #i was awful and i think about it all the time and wish i could send her a pizza and say any resentment is justified i'm so sorry #but i don't keep track of people. i don't know her last name i don't know how to contact her or if she'd even want that #i just think about it constantly for some fucking reason #if you're out there....man i'm sorry i didn't try harder to be friends i was 19 and at my absolute worst #I'm sorry about the illegal rat cage i never cleaned #literally i wish i could pay you reparations you wouldn't have to say a word to me just receive 'you didn't deserve that' + 50 usd #i think part of why this particular memory is so persistent- and has been for years like it constantly comes up when i'm tired- #is because the stakes are relatively low #like i was just a shit. i was just annoying and unkind. and then we both moved on and i'm better now and i assume she's ok. #the scope of it is just small enough.... like a burr. in my brain. #I'm hoping if i throw this into the ether i won't think about it as much lol #m2a

[lab-gr0wn-lambs]

It's an odd feeling when you make someone laugh with something you yourself didn't think was funny but it happens all the time because I guess most people irl just aren't used to the way neurodivergent internet-raised 20-somethings talk and an out of pocket meme phrase that you've heard 100 times is new and novel to them

#my old roommates once went into hysterics over ''fucking excuse me'' #confused the shit outta me #I mean that's not a meme that's just how I talk but the phrasing is kinda tumblr-y ig #when I hear someone make a direct tumblr meme reference irl and say it as if they made it up themselves dude the SIDE EYE I give them #nobody else in this room knows. They all think you're hilarious. But I know what you are 👁️👁️

[acecartoonplatypus]

Girl I should not have looked up who Laios’s English va was until after I finished the show because I knew it was familiar and now I’ve discovered that it’s Damien Fucking Haas, FROM FUCKING SMOSH, and now I can’t unhear his stupid fucking voice

#before you ask my roommate in college really liked smosh try not to laughs and now they’re a guilty pleasure of mine #and I do like Damien for the record it’s just now I’m not gonna be able to separate the two bastards #though I will say Laios and Damien do have similar vibes based on the videos and shit I’ve seen Damien in #and it’s not the same with knowing Sungwon Cho voices senshi bc I knew that going in #I got halfway through this fucking anime before learning this shit #anyway #acp says stuff #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon

[dennisboobs]

.

#the reason cisswap lesbian macden does nothing for me is bc i get my dose of lesbianism from canon charden <3 #i say it (jokingly) all the time but i think if the sunny fandom was more open to charden y'all would have more fun #everything ppl do with macden to make it ~more fun~ is literally. already there with charden #macden is a lot of fun in its own way but if i want butch/femme lesbians i have charden already-- #this is literally why i ship both. if i want to fuck around with gender i can throw charden together #if i want to fuck around with weird codependent loser roommates i can throw macden together #they have different dynamics and both bring different shit to the table #also idk such a massive part of dennis is his (often unapologetic but still stifled) more 'feminine' gender expression #so making him a cis woman who likes being feminine is like. yea. that sure is. cis woman dennis. #as someone who has an extremely complicated history w expressing femininity or anything that is even seen as being remotely femme #it doesn't grab me #the genderfuckery is not there #but TRANSBIAN CHARDEN???? YEAAAAAH #i think mac being so focused on upholding traditional mascilinity IS a very interesting dynamic to have next to. you know. dennis. #wheras charlie could not give less of a fuck #i think gender exploration with macden would take a completely different form but still be extremely interesting for both of them #but there's a lot less initial acceptance and a lot more hiding on den's part #especially if the two are in a relationship #because mac coming to terms with being gay took so long so dennis being at all feminine or even transfem is like #mac needs to do. more introspection #which is an entirely different set of issues to charden gender exploration where like #charlie being nonconforming. not shaving. not caring abt using she/her pronouns. being nontraditional in every way and not giving a fuck #would be absolutely fucking absurd to dennis who is very conformist after she comes out #and would probably be content to conform to whats expected of her as a woman with mac IF she did manage to come out at all #bc dennis would have to actually manage to come out. instead of hiding the fact she's trans > looking at carmen and the way mac treated her #i think both paths have additional challenges and that's. you know. whats interesting. #is cisswap den butchy? does she hide her masculine interests? is denise transmasc...?? #cisswap mac being butch is like. you know. nonconforming so it doesn't quite do the same thing as canon mac either #mac being Traditional and catholic and having to push past homophobia (internalized and externalized) to be himself is. pretty huge #would cisswap mac be a tradwife. like. thats sort of the equivalent