#short but have a read more so I don't flood yo dashes

[madqueenshanny]

Eyy Frodo violently objects to anyone flirting with Prince Kili. He will set him up as he sees fit. THank you.

OH MY GOD YES. ALL THE YES.

"Frodo lad, you know that elf was…er….well, he is a friend of Kili’s. There was no need to hit him with Wooden Sting".

Yes, that’s the actual name of his sword.

And yes, Bilbo starts to believe that Frodo is taking on his husband’s dislike of elves each time a delegation comes, because each time there is an elf that flirts with Kili. At least one elf.

And they’re not just females, either.

"Prince Kili needs to marry a princess! With a big silver castle! Not golden, because Papa doesn’t like that."

'Papa' just shakes his head over a document and ignores the entire conversation, by the way. He just hopes Fili gets someone because HEIRS.

"And she needs to have really pretty hair that blows in the wind-"

"Lad."

"And she needs to know how to braid! She can’t be like you and have to learn AFTER Papa proposes."

'Papa' laughs, 'Mama' sighs.

"She also has to cook REALLY good food…Do you think Uncle Bombur has a sister?"

'Mama' laughs, 'Papa' groans.

"And I don’t want a weed-eating elf marrying Kili! S’not fair to all the pretty dwarf ladies….and dwarf men, I guess. They can be pretty too!"

"…Did your Papa teach you that about elves?"

"Uh-huh!" Frodo tells him with a smile as Thorin flees. "Except Prince Legolas, he’s super nice!"

Thorin groans from two rooms away because why.

In the end, Frodo does his best not to slap too many elven  (or unworthy dwarven) backsides. It just sort of comes with the prince of having a beautiful family member like Kili.

Though truth be told, Kili doesn’t mind. As long as he doesn’t chase away anyone he really wants, then it’s all well-and-good. It’s actually kind of cute, the way Frodo puffs up his cheeks, bats the other and calls them an intruder on Kili’s virtue, or just proceeds to be extremely awkward.

Though there was that time Legolas had wine spilled all over his shoes…

Eh. Doesn’t matter. He forgave the rascal and Kili’s learning archery from him.

Besides, Kili’s betting Legolas gets with Gloin’s son eventually anyway.

#short but have a read more so I don't flood yo dashes #bagginshield #bagginshield family #domestic bagginshield #cuddlebeaglesyndrome