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aslisjournal · 2 years
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Asli Hersi
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elkiem · 2 years
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I'm on the train right now, utterly pissed because I lost the train before this one, and I will arrive at my house late, but I remember I made some funny edits of my bestie Jason because it's his birthday. If I was in Gotham, I would ask him what are his other placements and be buddy-buddy with him because we are both fire signs. If he has something in Sagittarius, I would scream.
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mrly · 9 months
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i was looking too, but i didn't want you to notice
i was coy, i was cool, and i was pretending
meeting in glances, reminiscent feelings of hunger and thirst
two bodies in the same room but moments away
aching, yearning, longing
engaging in misleading conversations, unaware and inventing persons who act like this
animating ourselves to look like people and not feelings
performing for one another, against each other, and to others
at a loss, at an ends
the cue to start
and then you said hi
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basic-e · 3 months
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All of the dust settling now
The rooms full of allergens; a settling cloud
The fog that was lifted still beckoned somehow
A new way to look for
Another route
Not another story
Not historical glory
Insanity and creativity
Creation and chaotic destruction
Amassing weapons without mass production
Should we make ourselves or let our selves be made
By those in power or those within its debate
By those of hour or those that still remain to dream; to rate
Or is it too late?
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I still see you in things even though I'm not supposed to anymore. I still wait for your explanations even though you never owed me one. I still find you looking at me with that look that I know for sure only exists in my imagination. And I still dream of you lesser than I used to before but almost always when I'm almost about to forget I ever mistook anything we had for love. And I wonder did I truly lose my mind out there loving you all alone, for both of us even when there was nothing left to love. I surely did, there is no other reason to still think of you, to still dream of you. For I still can not seem to wrap my head around the fact that we were not lovers, that we weren't made up of something similar, something that tethered us to each other that called to me everytime I was about to let you go. It still calls, far less though. Much lesser than before me, I might be getting better I think. I don't know what I was trying to say, that happens quite a lot now. Why am I beginning to sound like some crazy lover who can not forget someone who never wanted them? I'm not like that, I wasn't supposed to be like that, it was never supposed to be like this.
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fictionalnormalcy · 6 months
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I don't understand love.
I don't understand, how you can meet someone in life and then decide, yes I want to be with them for the rest of my life. How that great of a bond can be built that they become more important than friendships and familiar bonds. Where they come first, this is the person you want to grow old with.
I see the occasions when it is fleeting. When they misinterpreted this temporary attraction. A flame that burned brightly but eventually fizzled out. I don't believe in true love. It can't be possible.
It can be someone you met when trapped in K-12, a college new experience, and even from your childhood. Where I find history feels plausible.
These feelings remain, because I'm in my own pathetic situation. Where I can't even hold friendships, conversation with my own family isn't initiated without my sending the first message. So how am I to believe it? That I am worthy of finding someone who does want to be stuck to my side until we breathe our last breath? There isn't evidence of it when I am always the one to give the first hello. When the bond I initiated comes to burn and I am the one with lingering marks. When even the ones I have been forced to spend my life with have me feeling like I am the curse.
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elizaellwrites · 1 year
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Legacy of the Fallen Chapter 8 Snippet
Her first true feeling in days struck her; fear. It wasn’t for herself, but for Jacob. Everything fell away from her, the voices of the others behind her, the other students around them, and the fact that they were in the humans’ territory. It was gone as she reached over her head and drew her weapon, her breath stuttering as her feet pounded faster against the ground. She wouldn’t lose him too; as angry as she had been, with an abyss in her heart, she couldn’t.
He just stood there, looking up at the beast, one hand in his pocket. Her heart leaped, her thoughts whirling in terror about what that meant. She wouldn’t put it past her brother to accept his fate, he had done so in actual battles, and now he was unarmed. She questioned his caring for what had happened, his absence glaring in her face while she mourned, but could it be that this was the loss that pushed him over the edge he had been bordering on?
She skidded to a halt as a golden sword sprung into vision, seemingly out of nowhere. A red gem glinted in the afternoon sun, the blackened hilt curving up and around his hand. She could hear the others stop behind her, but her eyes were locked on the blade.
It couldn’t be.
“Where did he get that?” Cameron’s voice was tense, his large frame looming behind her.
“The lost and found?” Ryan murmured, more strained than usual. Normally, this comment would have earned him an elbow to the chest, but all she could manage was a sideways glance before refocusing on what was happening.
The daemon had lunged for him, Jacob skillfully dodging and slashing the beast. The golden blade sparked with the telltale red of blood, matching the gem at the hilt well.
“Doesn’t matter right now,” Cameron’s voice hardened. “Proceed with the plan or do the best you can.”
Taglist: @hxad-ovxr-hxart, @the-printed-words, @frostedlemonwriter, and @my-cursed-prince. If you'd like to be added, please let me know!
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withinthesplendor · 2 years
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An Excerpt:
It seems to me sometimes that I do not really exist, but that I merely imagine I exist. The thing that I have the greatest difficulty in believing in, is my own reality. I am constantly getting outside myself, and as I watch myself act I cannot understand how a person who acts is the same as the person who is watching him act, and who wonders in astonishment and doubt how he can be an actor and a watcher at the same moment. -André Gide, The Counterfeiters (1925)
Art by Agnes Cecile
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archived-abyss · 2 years
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Blue suits you
I find you have grown on me, gazing upon your beauty seems to delight me with a sense of hope.
Everyday I search for you even when your dormant and the night takes over, I still look.
I always hope to see you day after day. I’d love to just lay with you all night caressed by your luminous smile.
Dawn falls as you fade away, almost invisible to the naked eye.
I still look for you. Your still there just blended in the all blue.
It suits you💙
~love letter from abyss
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darichonne · 2 years
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insta: @darichonne
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thebittercorvus · 1 year
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one day i was asked, what i wanted to become.
a young kid such as myself, i said that i wanted to become a hairdresser,
because my parents couldn't handle my hair and it made me suffer.
i wanted to become a hairdresser so that no other kid would have to suffer at the hands of someone that doesn't understand the beauty of their hair,
or how to comb it in a way that doesn't hurt.
i was told not to dream of being a hairdresser, but something more important. anybody can become a hairdresser, they said, even though none of them could handle my hair. anybody can become a hairdresser, but not everybody can become something important.
so, think of something else.
one day i was asked what i wanted to become.
annoyed at the way my clothes hung weirdly and how my peers mocked them, at how none of it was truly mine but hand-me-downs and how it had to be belted and tied so it wouldn't simply slip off,
angry for being forced into skirts and dresses and glitter, dragged at the church so i would become a good girl,
i drew a magnificent suit and said i wanted to become a tailor.
because the only way i would be allowed to dress as i liked would be if i made it myself.
so i was told, that nobody really makes a living out of clothes. it is nothing but a hobby for women into their retirement or reject men, all homosexuals in hiding. i was told to dream of something more important. anybody with thread and needle can sew but not everybody becomes someone worth tailoring a suit for.
then i convinced myself, that i wanted to become a doctor.
my family cheered. such an important career, fitting for a bright kid. they said i would become someone important, someone whose hair would be handled by hairdressers and someone whose dress would be fitted by tailors.
my teachers beamed proudly. such an important career, and they would've been the ones who guided me there. someone important, someone they'd proudly announced to have taught.
everyone cheered,
but myself.
i, who hated talking with people. i, who could not handle loss. i, who became discouraged so easily. i, who still didn't know what i wanted to become.
one day i was asked what i wanted to become and everyone thought i would say i'd become a doctor.
on a last ditch attempt to make my father look at me not as a stranger under his roof but as his first daughter, i said i wanted to get into computer science just like he did.
my family looked at me strangely. we thought you wanted to become a doctor, they said. nobody choose that for you, so how come you changed your mind? surely you can't be thinking it's because it's going to be hard. nothing good comes easily. if it were easy everyone would be a doctor, just how everybody can become a hairdresser and a tailor, even though we're yet to figure out your hair and clothes. anyone can do it, not us though.
my teachers were disappointed, but said such is the way of life. they were getting annoyed too, i kept trying to flee from the church, i kept trying to help my classmates, i kept trying to avoid social events. i kept calling them out for always blaming us and making us argue amongst ourselves. they weren't quite as proud anymore.
when we graduated they named only the first two girls of the honor roll list, even though they said they would name none for the sake of fairness. i was third and i still think that was on purpose.
i went to college and nobody asked what i wanted to become anymore.
my parents asked why was i dreaming big of leaving town to study somewhere worth my time. it made me wonder how come they expected me to become a doctor, when i couldn't even pay for the bus, let alone the guides and classes. then again miracles were always expected of me, but i had to accept others as only humans.
i went to college and nobody asked me what i wanted to become anymore because surely by then i must've had life figured out. i was seventeen and nailing it as it came. i'm on my twenties still figuring it out. i'm starting to think all of it was a lie.
then i dropped out and fled.
the highways didn't ask what i wanted to become, but where was i going with only a backpack and twenty bucks on my pocket, no phone or identification. the police didn't ask either but i was hiding away from them.
the night sky didn't ask what i wanted to become, but how come i ended up so far from heaven. the daughter of god fallen from grace, the daughter of god exiled from heaven, the daughter of god fleeing from fate. a lost daughter is only lost, a strange under somebody's roof, never to be found again as the same person she was when she became lost. regardless of where and when you find me, you might find out that i am no longer a daughter of god.
the border patrol didn't ask what i wanted to become, but who was i and what was i doing at their lands doorstep. i said i'm lost. i said i'm trying to find the future somebody else stole from me. i said i'm the world's worst hairdresser. i said i'm a wannabe tailor. i'm an infamous doctor. i'm a dropout engineer. i'm an illiterate writer. a sobered-up poet. a criminal without a record. a con-men that nobody falls for. a liar who can only speak truths. i'm a former daughter of god. i'm unholy, disgraced, chained up, satanic and earthbound. i don't know who i am, but somebody told me if i walked here i would figure it out.
do you know who am i? who am i supposed to become?
they shoot me in the head and left me rotting at the trenches that separate hell from heaven.
and i'm still not sure in which side i landed.
my body walked across the desert, mountains, rivers. somewhere in there, lost, there's someone who looks exactly like me. don't be fooled. it's the ghost of a dead dream.
one day i was asked, what i wanted to become.
truth is that, they never caught me. truth is i'm still walking across the desert and the mountains, at the beach, floating across the river. somewhere there, lost. truth is i never fell, but fled and from the ground i learned to take flight.
and somewhere there,
i became free.
—a fall from grace is an uprising; thebittercorvus
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aslisjournal · 2 years
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excerpt from  “I Argued with the Stars About You”,  Asli Hersi
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elkiem · 2 years
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I have seen the movie "Batman vs Robin" where the main focus is the relationship between Damian and Bruce. He was kinda harsh to Dick, but it was great seeing Damian fighting everything, even the morals. And the ending was like ??? Don't get me wrong, I really like Bruce as Batman, but why did he do that? The moral of the story was sending Damian Wayne to the Himalayas? While Dick was saying: "He is only a child" and he, as always, was right.
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mrly · 9 months
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filling the room with a sadness
you told me you felt it too
and when you walked in, you walked around it
and tried your best to stay intact
you kept telling a story and never found yourself finishing it
only jumping to the next story
the air left an urgency for your breath, almost like you needed to gasp for every word
i watched you ramble on and smiled inside myself
you left that day and i never saw you again
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hotwraithbones · 2 years
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“Demonic Homecoming Dance” 💀 1st published in @corporeallitmag // from my @bottlecappress chapbook Lipstick[less] Mania: A Ritual for No One — still on sale, but only till the end of today! 👹🫀🦄
regarding both presses — be sure to visit the links in their bios — these editors and my fellow contributors are all absolutely MARVELOUS.
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holydirtysoul · 1 year
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Would the departed never nowhere nohow reappear? Ever he would wander, selfcompelled, to the extreme limit of his cometary orbit, beyond the fixed stars and variable suns and telescopic planets, astronomical waifs and strays, to the extreme boundary of space, passing from land to land, among peoples, amid events. Somewhere imperceptibly he would hear and somehow reluctantly, suncompelled, obey the summons of recall.
Ulysses (18.2012–18) by James Joyce
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