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#sick burn
petitelepus · 11 days ago
Phlegmatic! the reader enjoy Swerve's company and his endless conversations? The human shows no negativity in his direction and the bartender himself can see that he is being listened to. Only the other bots laugh and say that the reader himself doesn't care and you can see the boredom of the minibot stories on his face
Despite being the very epitome of calmness, you don't take kindly of other bots laughing at your friend and you hate it how they put words in your mouth.
You see Swerve's smile wobble dangerously, like he is about to cry, but he tries to keep smiling, even if it hurts. You turn towards the bots who insulted your friend and give them a piece of your mind.
"You know, if I could, I would slap you guys so hard even Necrobot wouldn't find you."
The laughter comes to abrupt stop and bots and Swerve gape at you in shock.
"Wait, what?" The mean bots blink in shock, not expecting you to talk like you did with such a emotionless face. Somehow that's just salt to the injury.
"Was that too hard for you to understand? Is being stupid a profession or are you guys just gifted?"
The bots look at each like lost puppies, but at least puppies were cute.
"You know, Brainstorm and Perceptor are probably trying to learn how long you bots can live without brains. You should go and tell them your age."
"We were just-!" One of them tries to appeal to you but you don't give them a chance.
"Do you remember when I asked for your opinion? Because I certainly don't." You give the mechs a cold shoulder as they take their leave and turn back to Swerve who looks at you in wonder.
"That was amazing."
"Just having my friend's back." You nod and Swerve is all smiles as he continues his tale.
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Beatrix: I was arrested for being too cool.
Mochi: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.
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nobodycallsmerae · 5 months ago
When you hate your best friend's girlfriend
Cyborg: Yo Terra! What's taking you so long... BB's waiting in the car for your *makes a face* date.
Terra: I'll be there soon...Just tell him I'm putting on my make-up Cy.
Cyborg:(sweetly) You don't need make-up Terra...
Terra: Aww... thanks Cyborg!
Cyborg: ...You need plastic surgery. 😎😎
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sirkayleeofcamelot · 6 months ago
Be less worried with what I look like when I strip from my armor—the only thing your gossiping tongue could strip is your own honor.
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Man I was singing the Fiona Apply lyric "how can I ask anyone to love me when all I do is beg to be left alone" and my mom looked at me and said "Does that hit a little close to home?"
Sick burn mom
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esthersinclair · 8 months ago
Cody: I’m the chosen one-
Iga: Chosen by who?
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fuforthought · a year ago
I had to post this clip as it contains the sickest burn in kung fu movie history.
Wait for it...
The Lama Avenger (1979)
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demented-dukey · a year ago
Remus: I wrote my brother a "get better soon" card...
Remus: ...he's not sick. I just think he can get better. 😈
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idrownfishes0 · a year ago
Jaune Convinced Yang and Everyone Else Not to Kill Raven
Raven: "Well... I suppose I owe you my life."
Jaune: "No thanks, I've heard about your life and I'm not impressed."
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catefrankie · a month ago
All three of the cats swiveled their heads and stared at him in disapproval.
The rabbit’s ears wilted under their combined gaze. “It was just a thought.”
“On the contrary,” said Miss Eliza.
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savagechickens · 11 months ago
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Sharks-being-jerks week continues!
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rarebitdreams · 8 months ago
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pancakecorvid · 10 months ago
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My friends are dead to me now. That hoe got him on his first summon.
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aperilousjourney · 3 days ago
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