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queen-of-reptiles · 2 months

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𝚂𝚄𝙽𝚂𝙴𝚃𝚂 𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝚂𝙴𝙰

description: while walking alone back home along the beach, mary meets a few strangers, who teach her how to play volleyball, - her eyes are drawn however, to a better view.

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mary fowler x female reader

disclaimer: this is all fiction! Do not take any of this seriously.

warnings: just plain cuteness, like a few kisses and curse words but mainly just fluff and mutual pining

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y/n just posted

liked by y/f/n1, y/f/n2, and 798 others

tagged y/f/n1, jake_uts1 and 11 others

y/n sun, sea, sand and sunsets (+ an angry Sally and a smug Jake)

view 300 comments...

y/f/n1: Is the second photo after I drowned you?

y/n: before - which is why I still look so happy 🙄

y/f/n1: 😇😇

y/f/n2: gAWd that party was so good

y/n: it was a veryyyyyy good night 😂

y/f/n3: i miss just dance sm omg ! 😅

y/n: i miss you sm omg

y/f/n3: don't i'll cry !! 🥹

sally_c: i was seconds from breaking Jake's neck

jake_uts: Don't worry babe, I was seconds from breaking yours

sally_c: 🥰🥰

y/n: You guys stress me out sm as a couple

jake_uts: 😏😏

see more comments...

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y/n kept her eye on the volley ball - she and her friends were on the beach, as usual, the Australian sun setting over them, the temperature perfect in the sense of they could play without sweating but it was still warm.

"Spike!" Jake called and y/n jumped, pushing the ball with a harsh slap, the ball landing at Sally's feet who groans.

"I couldn't get my hand out in time ya cu-" Sally begins, but Jamie shoves her, the boy chuckling.

"Rotate." y/n adds, skipping from the court to umpire so her friend Melanie could have a go, they were an odd number today, with Sally, Jake, Mikey, Jamie and y/n.

y/n was watching the game when she saw her, a girl walking in shorts, her shoes in her hand watching them play, watching y/n shout out suggestions as they did.

The two met eyes, both blushing slightly as they did so. y/n chocked on her own spit, turning to bend and grab her water to take a long swig.

The girl was beautiful, she was stunning, and she was walking toward y/n. The panic that flooded through y/n's body was instant when she noticed the girl coming over.

"Hi." The girl smiled.

"Gd'evening." y/n hummed, watching as Mikey tried to spike but Sally manages to block it.

"Looks like fun." the girl says, tucking a strand of dark hair behind her ear.

"Oh, it is, but we're an uneven amount today - so I'm sat out for now." y/n explains.

"Well, if you guys can teach me, I can play?" The girl offers and y/n grins, she offers her hand to the beautiful girl.

"y/n." She introduces and the girl smiles.

"Mary." The girl smiles, shaking y/n's hand.

"Right listen up dick-heads." y/n calls, stopping the game but Jamie does roll his eyes at her. "If we can teach Mary how to play, she'll join in." y/n explains, Mary smiling sheepishly.

"Awesome." Jamie nods.

"Yeah great!" Mikey grins kindly.

"Sounds good." Sally adds.

"Let's do this!" Jake finishes and the group start.

They first dissect the game, Mary smiling as they explain what happens and the different type of hits. Then once they had done that, they taught her the positions of the court.

Mary was funny, she had a really pretty smile and y/n couldn't help but have to shut her eyes every few minutes to try and fight the thoughts about Mary's body.

Sally kept looking over at y/n, smirking with a knowing look in her eyes as she tried to focus on Mary and helping her play. Once Mary had warmed up a bit, y/n was teaching her how to serve.

"You want to keep your hands strong, pushing from the shoulder not the wrist." y/n explains.

"Okay." Mary nods. "Like this?" She then asks and y/n hums, moving behind her to guide her hands.

"Like this." y/n continues, not noticing the way her lips brushed Mary's ear, or the way the girl had stopped completely, trying not to sink into the warmth of y/n's chest.

"Okay." Mary breathed, Sally and Jake both sent each other a look, rolling their eyes as y/n stepped away, Mary looking back slightly with red cheeks.

Mary pushed the ball in the air, keeping her hand hard and pushing through it with her shoulder, the serve going over the net easily which caused the group to cheer.

"You got it." y/n grins and Mary smiles.

"Team time!" Sally yells. She then looks around. "Oh it is so girls vs boys." Sally then says and Jake laughs jokingly.

"Oh this will be so easy. You hit like a girl." He teases his girlfriend.

"And you whine like a boy." Sally teases him back making Jake pause and look at her confused.

"I'm not whining." Jake begins, but y/n lightly throws the ball at his face, it bouncing off his forehead and top of his nose and back into y/n's arms, causing Jake to whine and rub his head.

Jamie sighs at him and Jake pauses, realising he had fallen for Sally and y/n's trap, they high five without looking toward each other and Mary giggles behind them.

"Okay, let's play!" Mikey says, jumping up and down excitedly.

Over the next hour it was obvious the teams were very well matched, they were neck and neck in terms of victorious games and as they played the decider, they were once again a point in difference.

Mary was good, she was quick and seemed to have very good stamina, she was athletic and strong, y/n could see that in the way her muscles tensed when she jumped for a ball or hit one.

Ten minutes before their final game, Mary had taken her top off so she was wearing her swimsuit, and while y/n and her friends were already like that, y/n's mouth dropped.

Sally snorted as y/n looked away from Mary's toned arms and exposed back, she tried to ignore the giggles coming from Sally as y/n internally panicked.

Now, they were on the last game and y/n just knocked the ball over the net, Jamie running forward to hit it up and trying to get it over, y/n tipped it over again, Jake running forward to get it.

Then as it came back over, Mary spiked it into the back of the court, the ball bouncing as Mikey squealed in the hope it would help him get it.

y/n and Sally cheer, y/n moving over to pull Mary into a hug, ignoring the way Mary's hands feel on the bottom of her exposed back. Sally joins in on the hug, the three girls cheering.

"Yeah, yeah, we get it you won." Jake says and y/n laughs flipping him off as she grabs her bag.

"Whose up for drinks?" She asks and everyone's hands go up other than Mary. "You coming?" y/n asks, offering her hand.

"That okay?" Mary asks and the loud sound of 'yes; and 'of course' comes from the group.

"Come on, first round on me." y/n adds with a smile and Mary grins.

"Okay." She chuckles and takes y/n's hand, blushing as y/n squeezes it slightly, but Mary keeps their fingers looped as they walk away.

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y/n just posted on her story x3

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maryfowlerrr just posted on her story x3

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twitter/X

username1: YOOOOOO anyone seen Mary's story?

username2: the one with THE GIRL???? 😩😩

username3: who is she???

username4: she's HOT 😰😰

username5: ^^^^^

username6: I FOUND HER - she's @y/n 😌😌

username7: you are quickkkkkk!! 😙

username8: 🤣🤣

see more comments...

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The evening had now faded into very early morning, Mary and y/n were the only ones left, walking along the beach, talking about everything.

Mary explained to the group what she did and they were all mightily impressed. Sally and Jake went on to explain they were in university with y/n which was how they met and that Mikey ran a parkour park with his family.

"I just like being with kids, and I love beach sports." y/n shrugs, Mary smiling softly as y/n got bashful about what she wanted to do.

y/n had always loved the beach, she assumed it was because she was Australian through and through, but really she just loved the beach.

So, y/n had been at university for business studies and sports science, hoping to run a beach sports club for children once she got out, teaching surfing, volleyball, body boarding, the works.

"I think it sounds like a great idea." Mary promises. "You could even teach soccer." She adds, nudging y/n's shoulder and making her laugh.

"I don't know about that, I'm no Matilda." She teases Mary who rolls her eyes. "I hope you have enjoyed today, I'm sure being on Christmas break means you're meant to relax, so I hope we helped." y/n tells Mary who smiles.

Mary had come home during the break in the WSL, wanting to be with her family for Christmas and New Years, but she would soon be heading back off to the UK.

"You did. I really enjoyed today." Mary smiles.

"Good." y/n nods. Mary looks over at her, the two now back in their tops and watching the sea as the clock neared 2 am.

"You're really pretty." Mary said quietly, a soft smile on her face as she admired y/n's side profile, the girl turning to face Mary.

"So are you." y/n smiled shyly.

"Could we maybe spend some more time together?" Mary asks. "Just us, before I go?" She then asks and y/n smiles holding out her hand for Mary to take, which she does.

"I'd really like that." y/n nods and Mary grins, blushing slightly as she moves to put her head on y/n's shoulder.

"I'd really like it too." Mary says and y/n smiles out at the ocean.

"I'm really glad you decided to walk down the beach today Fowler." y/n chuckled and Mary giggled.

"So am I." Mary agreed.

The two sat there for a bit longer, sharing whispers and giggles before they got up and started to walk back to Mary's, hands linked as they moved through the quiet streets around them.

Once they got to Mary's door, the two stood talking softly for a moment, longer, eyes drinking each other in as much as they could, despite having already exchanged numbers and arranged to meet tomorrow.

"Good night Mary." y/n smiled softly and Mary pecked her cheek. "You missed." y/n hummed and Mary giggled, leaning up to peck y/n on the lips.

y/n moved her hand, cupping the back of Mary's neck to keep their lips together for just a moment longer, y/n had been thinking of doing this the second she had joined the volleyball game.

The two pulled away and y/n couldn't help but grin as Mary blushed, y/n let her hand leave the back of Mary's neck to run over her pink cheek.

"I'll see you tomorrow, pretty girl." y/n promises Mary and the girl nods before y/n winks and walks away, looking back just once to see Mary jumping up and down in front of her door.

y/n smiled, looking away and walking home, suddenly deciding she was very glad for volleyball.

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END

#woso #woso x reader #woso x y/n #social media woso #woso community #woso soccer #australian women #australia #the matildas #thetillies #mary fowler #mary fowler x y/n #mary fowler x reader #mary fowler imagine #volleyball #beach day

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signed-loni · 2 months

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So can we have sally face chacter (by sally face characters I mean the gang: Ash, Larry, Sal) with a fem! S/O that is kinda like the fem version of rodrick from the diary of a wimpy kid like shes a rough person and in a band and etc also her style being similar to this u dont have to do it lol have a good rest of ur day and drjnk water pls :)

ARRRRRRRGGJHH I LOVE THIS STYLE SM

Anyhooooo YESS!!

Warnings: cusssing, reader is fem!

Sal 🎭

Sal is like fucking crazy for you

LOVES THAT YOUR IN A BAND

(My bfs a drummer AND LEMME TELL YOU, PEOPLE WHO ARE IN BANDS R HOT ASF)

He loves when you come over to his house and just mindlessly play ur drums while he tells you about his day/ olays hus guitar

Since your literally rodrick, your gonna be the oldest out of two sisters

Your little sister, whos in middle school, you LOVE to poke fun at.

Sal saw you making fun of her and was a bit concerned, but realized you were just playing around and was like “phew”

“Sup ugly? Y’gonna go see that loser friend of yours or what?” U say to your little sister “rachel is NOT a loser! Shes just different.” Your sister says back “whatever you say nerd.” You say and bring sal back up to your room

“Were..you being serious?” Sal asks, a bit quiet “huh? Oh,no. I love her, thats just how we show our love. She knows i dint actually mean that” you respond back, 100% honestly “oh! Ok.” Sal replies, a bit relieved

Comes to LITERALLY all of your band performances! Doesnt miss a single one and is your biggest supporter EVER.

probably owns every single piece of merch your band sells, and his room is just LITTERED with things from ur band

Your band mates can b fuckin jerks ngl

they comment on ur bfs mask and ur like “The fuck??? Uhm not to my fucking face i think tf not”

You probably beat then tf up or smth idfk

🤎Larry🍃

“so we fuckin with ur band music playin or nah?”

much like sal. Comes to every one of ur band practices and fuckin jams out to ur shit

Has all of ur guys’ music on a cd or vinyl

acc fuckin obsessed w u

likes to go on liquor store dates w u (kinda like the part in rodrick rules where him and greg go to the liquor store ykwim)

Acts offended when ur mean to him as a joke

”Babe! What the hell! I thought u loved me😞”

“Larry, listen CLOSELY, theres no fuckin way your laying a HAND on my drums. Theres just no way. I know u have cheeto fingers. Dont even think about it”

Laughs hysterically every single time u say smth “mean” to ur sisters.

but thats mostly bc hes normally high out of his mind

speaking of which, GETTING HIGH WHILE U GUYS R PLAYING UR INSTRUMENTS OR SMTH LIKE THAT. HOLY FUCK.

idk what its called, but when ur partner takes a hit and blows it into ur mouth, HOLY SHIT THATS FUCKING HOT

does that w u all the time btw

probably snuck into ur room one time to play ur drums, and right as u walked in u saw him, and literally slapped the FUCK outta him. Its was hilarious

overall loves the crap outta u and is so supportive of ur music career, always telling ppl at school or sm to listen to u guys play and gives them the address to ur guys’ next performance

best bf ever

sry i didnt add ash, lost motivation

#sally face #sal fisher x reader #sally face x reader #sal fisher #sally face hcs #ashley campbell x reader #todd morrison #todd morrison hcs #ashley campbell hcs #larry johnson headcannons #larry johnson x reader #larry johnson #larry fanfiction

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sketching-pasketti · 3 months

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Oh hey look it's the longest fucking post I'll ever make

Proxy Headcannons

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General Headcannons:

All of them hate Slender but literally can't do anything about it cause he controls them

Everyone hates Tim but love Brian

Toby is a gremlin

Individual Headcannons (Masky/Tim):

"Oh I'm a whore for red velvet cake" "Yeah, Tim you say that everytime we go get cake"

Smells like cologne and cigarettes

Tired 24/7

Probably hates Slender the most out of all of them

Loves Five Guys a lot for some reason

"Uh, half of y'all have criminal records and the other half are supernatural creatures, no shit Slender won't let y'all work"

Says "y'all" a lot even though he's not southern (me too tho)

Cannot stand county music

A metalhead

Coffee addict

Calls people nicknames sometimes (example: Kate;Katie, Lulu;Lu, Lazari:Lazii, Kate:Katester)

"Ow? My ass?? What the hell, Katie????"

Speaks 4 languages

Can't stand Jeff

"You smell like cigarettes and it's really repulsive" "Okay?? You smell like weed, shut up"

Kicks ass at Mario Kart Wii

Also kicks ass at Wii Sports

Individual Headcannons (Hoodie/Brian):

"I pay for all of you guys' food so I don't think you get to say anything"

Is always either in his room or out at the store

Disappears for literally months and then comes back like nothing happened

Low-key has a (b)romance with Tim

Babysits Sally

A swiftie

Really likes Hits Different

Assigns people random emojis to their names

Examples are Tim(🚬), Toby(👹), Kate(🥺), Jeff(🔪)

Plays visual novels in secret

Not really though, cause Slender knows

Really good friends with Jane and her wife

Doesn't like how itchy his mask is

Wants to run Offender over with a car

Individual Headcannons (Toby):

Screams Taylor Swift lyrics at people who piss him off (*cough cough* Tim *cough cough* ex; "LET'S FAST FORWARD TO 300 TAKEOUT COFFEES LATER" "WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU RODGERS??")

Also blasts music at ungodly hours

Heavily annoyed that Tim is the only one that Slender trusts to help with his tic attacks

Heard Jeff snort crack once and now that noise is a tic of his

Names his hatchets

"oh no"s randomly

Threw an egg at Slender once

Screams the lyrics to the songs he listens to

Has a collection of shiny things he's stolen from his victims

Honks (goose or car, you decide)

5'8"

Ate glue on multiple occasions

Didn't even notice it was glue actually until Brian told him

Tastes Jane's candles (she gets very upset at this)

Bites people

Forgets he chewed the side of his mouth off and gets shocked when he looks in the mirror

Rare whisper boy

His grandparents taught him German and now he has an accent and everything

Drew on all of his Converse

Perches on the stair railing

Sleeps in the starfish position

Individual Headcannons (Kate):

Also draws on her Converse

Draws everyone and everything

Painted most of the pictures Slender has in his office

Helps Toby collect shiny things

Hunches over like the hunchback of Notre Dame whenever she's doing something

Her back hurts constantly

Mapped the house so she wouldn't get lost

Whisper girl

Pierced her nose by herself (and made a huge fucking mess)

Let's Sally do her makeup

Slaps Tim's ass everytime he walks past her

Eats crayons on purpose

Vomits each time though

Has a large vinyl collection

And a Funko pop collection

Uses "🥺" unironically

Can ice skate

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta hcs #hcs #headcanons #headcanon #ticci toby #tim wright #kate the chaser #brian thomas #hoodie #masky #creepypasta hoodie #creepypasta masky #slender proxy #proxy #proxy headcannons

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scary-lasagna · 5 months

Note

Ok so slender gets a girlfriend and keeps it a secret for a while. Then one day he comes home with his baby and asks the proxies to babysit for a day. How do they react?

tldr: slenderbabies are weird

Slender

He would never ask them to baby sit a child when they can't even look after themselves for a day.

Toby has an unbeaten record of hurting himself at least one a day for the past three years. Jack has been keeping tab.

He will, however, allow them the grace of witnessing his first born child stuck to his face.

Slenderbabies are uber strong, and there's no way to get the child off of him.

But if there will be anyone to figures it out, it'll be the proxies.

"Tickling is a no-go." Brian announces.

So there sat Slender, perched at his desk and sweating buckets while gazing at the clock. He would surely be late at this rate. And as much as he loved his little mouse, he need them o f f.

"What about the keys? Anything?" Masky questioned.

"Negative." Kate answered.

"Oh my god guys, it's a kid, just pick it up." Clock stepped forward and put her hands around the baby's little pudgy tummy and attempted to pull them off of Slender.

It didn't work. Just like the 6 other times they've all tried.

Slender sat in silence, the only thing announcing his disgruntle was a quick sigh.

"Cocomelon! Kids love Cocomelon!" Toby was already pulling out his phone.

"Do not! Cocomelon makes them violent, I don't know why do not ask me." Slender spoke up.

Toby slowly puts his phone away.

"Any chance you can just show up at the meeting like this?" Masky asks.

"I cannot see."

"But you don't have eyes anyway..." Kate whispered, thoroughly confused.

The statement was ignored, and Offender walked in with Sally, considering Splendor was gone on a business trip. "Nice glasses."

"Shut your mouth." Offender only snorted at his brothers remark before lifting Sally up on his desk.

"Beat fire with fire."

Sally only giggled at the baby, greeting with a rub on the back. "How are you?" She smiled. She was met with only babbles.

"Would you like to come play with me? I have tea sets, toys, and Mrs. Rachel, and plushies, and we can watch a movie together."

While Sally was talking, she manages to wrap her arms around the baby, tugging a little, but to no avail.

"I HAVE THE BEST IDEA!" Toby suddenly yelled, startling nearly everyone in the room. most importantly the baby.

It started wailing and Sally tried to soothe it.

Slender debated if he started to cry, if it would help the situation.

Toby returned soon enough with a small shiny ball, one of Sally's.

"You gave me an idea Sally. Maybe it doesn't want Slender, just his head."

Slender slowly looked toward Toby, hoping he could feel his seething anger.

"I'm serious!!" Toby exclaimed, and stood to the side of Slender, present the ball within the baby's sight.

The wailing turned into confused sniffles, and then unlatched one clawed hand, reaching toward the ball.

"Bro, I'm gonna be the best fuckin dad, I swear." Toby grins, before quickly slapping a hand over his mouth, realizing he cursed not only in front of one child, but two.

Sally giggled, but also helped the child, maneuver from Slender's face to the ball.

Slender took a sigh of relief. A moments peace before he realized he was desperately late, and shot out of his seat.

"I need to go. Just don't let them watch Cocomelon." He called over his shoulder, and headed toward the door.

Toby was still holding the baby latching onto the ball as Slender left the manor.

"What do we do now?"

___

Slender returned home after a soul-crushing meeting to meet almost the entire manor piled sleeping around the couch.

His baby was still clinging to a now deflated ball. Upon gazing at this sight, toys, baby food, adult food, and children's books were scattered amongst the creeps. Spaghetti somehow got on the ceiling.

Little stinker wasn't even a year old and they've already accepted them as their own, sacrificing their own sanity to calm the baby down as it wailed when the ball popped.

Who knows how long it took for everyone to fall asleep. Slender settling himself down by Masky, who was barely keeping his eyes open. His head eventually drooped onto Slender's shoulder, who was reading a picture book out of curiosity.

Maybe he will let them babysit more often.

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta imagines #creepypasta blog #slender #ticci toby #proxies #familial

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boneskullravenriver · 3 months

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Y'all know I've been critical of the show for a bit. But I just watched the last season episode and like... I'm flabbergasted. Where was THIS energy in all the other episodes?

This is what I wanted.

The fight scene with ares?? Great. Loved it. We finally get a hint of the fact that even the gods look like regular people, they aren't (because up until now, I'm sorry but most of them just looked and acted like some guy™™™).

The flashbacks of Percy and Luke!!!

Percy FINALLY showing that he has some powers, great. Loved it.

Annabeth giving Percy her necklace?? Screaming crying throwing up.

Percy sassing Zeus in Olympus?? Poseidon coming to stop Zeus from turning his son into bbq?? Loved it.

Poseidon's face when Percy asked him if he dreamed of his mother?? Devastating. I was giggling and kicking my feet.

The ominous music and the tension between Percy/Luke during that scene in the forest?? Cinema. Showstopping. Perfect.

Percy jokingly calling Kronos "grandpa" and telling sally he loved her?? Screaming crying throwing up.

Literally the energy I wish the other episodes had. It did not feel like they were just going from place to place and being like "I know XYZ, this is what's happening and I'm going to tell you so this scene can end in the next 3 min!" Like the other episodes. And there was tension in this episode, the possibility that the trio could fail, not that they were breezing through every encounter thrown at them.

I'm absolutely baffled that it took TO THE LAST EPISODE for that medicore vibe to kind of move away a bit?? Like does that make sense??

Because I hated like half of this show. And then the last episode bitch slaps me across the room. What is going onnnnn

#pjo #pjo tv #pjo tv show #pjo tv show spoilers #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the olympians

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sorta-responsible-lesbian · 4 months

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Percy Jackson and the Olympians thoughts:

The way the showed Percy's dyslexia in this 🤌🤌🤌

UGH THAT MRS. DODDS TRANSFORMATUON INTO HER HARPERY FORM. FUCKING SLAPS

CALL STINKY GABE OUT PERCY GET HIS ASS

Ugh we stan Sally Jackson, absolute mom. I love her and I will always die for her

"Like...Jesus?" Percy is so real for that cause I would do the same thing king

Percy my sassy king don't be giving your mama that side eye

Sally doing the mom arm during the car crash 🥺🥺

Sally Jackson adopting me when???

There she is, my girl Annabeth Chase herself. The woman, the myth, the legend

"Yeah. But did you?" He did that line so fucking good. 10/10

First Percy and Mr. D interaction slaps, 10/10 perfect relationship

Ohhhh the cabins looking like Greek temples but with personal touches of the gods

I really like these scenes that show the rest of the story and how it develops snd not just from Percy's view

Percy already saying why don't the gods pay their child support huh

Percy praying to his mom 🥺🥺🥺 no one look at me

"Not you sunshine." Perfect casting for Annabeth

Percy stays head empty no thoughts when not given direction

Fucking goosebumps from the claiming scene

"I'm Sally Jackson's son!" Ugh the only valid mama's boy is Percy Jackson

#percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #pjo #thots of rae #pjo spoilers

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garbashedump · 3 months

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...white guy Scrabby phrases

I GOT THE LIST bunch of things of mildly zesty phrases Scrabby would probably say

"don't get your panties in a twist" (ofc ofc)

"shiver me timbers! I'm freezing like a popsicle out here"

"hey guys let's split up to cover more ground"

"working hard or hardly working?"

"hi hungry I'm dad."

"the early bird catches the worm!

"wow were sure in a pickle here!" (Prism fav phrase ofc)

"that's it no more Mr. Nice auditor! that's the last straw buckeroo."

"you're on thin ice pal."

"I'm keeping my eye on you."

"you catch more scrabbys with sugar than smoke "

"Ahh, a good ol' cup of Jake Joe!"

"I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!"

"Time to dig in!" / "Time to get my grub on!"

"Oh look the suns out while its raining! guess the devil is beating his wife"

"Uh oh looks like we got company..."

"See you on the flip side!"

"You're looking a little tipsy-tury my friend."

"Looks like someone's buzzed as a bee."

"Looks like someone is decks below the ship."

"Oh how the tables have turned."

"Its the heart of the cards!"

Lifting heavy stuff: "Man anymore lifting and I'll blow my back hip out."

"Well slap my ass and call me Sally."

"Well butter my bugs and call me a Biscuit"

"Better safe than sorry!"

"Oh crumbs."

"Let's not dilly-dally too long guys."

"Aw quit being a negative Nancy!"

"Oooooh..... Right in the bread basket."

"Jeeze Louise lemon squeeze!"

" Holy moly guacamole!"

"Stop all of this tomfoolery this instant!"

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away!"

"Oopsie daisy!"

"Guess whoo✨" (Covers Prism's eyes)

"Beggars aren't choosers."

"Ahh I see, the apple never falls far from the tree."

"Looks like ya got ants in your pants."

"All bark but no bite huh?"

"Man that really ruffles my feathers."

"Ah! It'll be like finding a needle in a haystack!!"

"I'm losing my marbles over here!"

.....ok.... i may or many not have more but the- they're Scrizzers..

damn are you zombie fungi? cause you got me under your spell

are you a spider? cause you woven me in your web of love

are you the summer sun? cause you got my cheeks sunburnt red

Prism: damn you a cigarette? cause you got me addicted to you (Scrabby would then die after hearing this)

btw these are directed towards lawful joke au by @chaosaliien

#damn are you a mantis? cause my head is all yours (interpret that however you want )#accept the cringe of the rizz #sneaked in a few sus ones for seasoning #I'm going insane i counted tan theres like 40 sum my god #lawful joke #scrabby lawful joke #prism lawful joke #lawful joke au #t #I'm so so normal #info dump #trash talks

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the-paris-of-people · 3 months

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Blue Brownies and Finding Nemo

Summary:

“Do you think if I was captured in the sea and taken to Australia, my Dad would try to find me?”

She looks like how Percy imagined her that night in the train bunk, sad, lonely, completely unloved. Percy blurts the first thing he can think of.

“Well, that would never happen because I wouldn’t let you get lost.”

Percy and Annabeth have a blue food movie date at Percy and Sally's apartment. Set at the end of summer after The Lightning Thief.

Read on AO3

“Honey, does Annabeth like brownies?” Sally calls from the kitchen.

“It’s okay, Mom,” Percy reassures as he rounds the corner. Thick heat hangs in the kitchen from the August humidity, slapping his hands with a thick coat of sweat. “I’m sure between the blue popcorn, gummy sharks and gummy bears, Annabeth will eat something. You didn’t have to prepare so much.”

“Oh, of course I did,” His mom drapes her arm over him as she tears open the brownie mix with her other hand. Percy closes his eyes, savoring the perfume and warmth he once thought he lost forever. “I don’t remember the last time you brought a friend over! And I’ve heard so much about Annabeth.”

“It’s not a big deal or anything, Mom,” Percy lies as he draws out a mixing bowl from the cupboard. “We could have just gone to the movies ourselves.”

“And miss out on the blue food extravaganza?”

“Yeah, the AMC did stop serving Blue ICEES."

"See? And what would a Finding Nemo party be without that? Oh," His mom's smile grows wider as she hears the door knock. "That must be her."

Percy and his mom both stare down at each other, then sprint to the door at the same time.

"Mom!" Percy protests. He knew Annabeth would love to meet his mom, but he was dreading all the embarrassing stories Sally joked she would tell.

"Sorry," Sally teases as she swings open the door. "You know I had to beat you here. Hi Annabeth!"

"Hi, Mrs. Jackson," A perfectly composed Annabeth greets. On her neck a sea-blue trident bead hangs low and in her hands lay a tray of blue brownies. If he didn't know any better, he would've thought meeting friends' parents was as smooth and natural to her as a knife cut to a monster's neck. Still, he caught the slight shake in Annabeth's voice, how she nervously brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. She’d tied her braids back into a low ponytail, like she was leading her Capture the Flag team to victory and needed to be prepared for anything. Percy always liked when she wore her hair like that. "I know you and Percy like blue food so I made these."

"Well, Percy was right when he said you were always prepared," Sally takes the brownies from her and pulls an off-guard Annabeth into a hug. For a second, Annabeth squirms in his mom’s arms, unsure of how to move, but finally she settles in and hugs her back. "Come in, sit down, I'll bring everything out to you."

"It's okay, mom," Percy was worried about his mom's energy level since she’d gone to the Underworld. Even though Smelly Gabe was gone and she'd enrolled in night classes at NYU, he saw how fatigued she’d been the past couple months, sagged slightly in the moments she thought he wasn't looking. "I'll bring out the food."

"Thank you, honey," Sally ruffles his hair as he walks by.

Percy’s hands tremble as he sorts the assortment of blue food in their special blue platter his mom had bought at the farmer’s market down the street, the hand-painted one with a mermaid on it. How was this going to go? The only time his mom had ever met one of his friends, he was kind of being chased by a minotaur and disappeared to the Underworld. What on earth was she going to talk to Annabeth now that they weren’t in a life or death crisis?

“Oh, and look how cute he was, in his jammies,” When Percy comes back out to the living room with the food, Sally had drawn out his baby albums and was pointing to a photo of baby Percy in his high chair, smeared pears across his lips.

“Mom,” Percy’s ears burn crimson red. “Can you please put that away?” “There’s no need to be embarrassed, Seaweed Brain,” Annabeth’s eyes glimmer mischievously. Oh gods. She would be using this as fodder for teasing him the next few summers. “Your pajamas don’t look that different now.”

“Mom!” Percy’s cheeks light on fire.

“Okay, sorry honey,” Sally shuts the album and touches Percy’s cheek tenderly. “You two enjoy. I’m just going to be in my room in case you want anymore brownies, just come get it.”

As she floats into the next room, Sally leaves a warm trace of brownies and buttery popcorn and sugary candy behind her. Percy inhales it as Annabeth stares at his mom in a trance. Percy’s mom had that effect on people.

“So,” Annabeth rubs her palms on her cargo pants as she chews on her lip, analyzing the snack options, then looking back up at Percy for a plan of attack. “You normally just eat all of this during your movie nights?”

“Not always,” Percy scoops out a bowl of popcorn for her, knowing it’s the snack that she would like best. ”Sometimes we just buy blue snacks from the bodega, but one time we made an entire blue pizza together. It took a week to get the dye out of the kitchen, but you should have seen it, it was awesome.”

“Cool,” Annabeth takes the popcorn from him and shifts in her seat uncomfortably. Percy wanted to smack himself for being an idiot. She’d come up here now because she was going to take the train down to D.C. to live with her dad for the first time in six years. She’d never had a movie night with her parents, and she wasn’t sure if history would repeat itself or if they could in the future. He shouldn’t have been going on about how well he got along with his mom.

“Anyway,” Percy turns on the TV and hovers over the Finding Nemo feature. Annabeth’s eyes flicker from the screen to the apartment door, like they did when she was distracted by something sad. Percy talks faster to get her to think about something else. “I figured we could watch a classic. You’ll love it. It’s got this talking turtle whos ‘totally tubular babyyy!’ ”

Okay, maybe he immediately regretted his weird surfer dude British voice, but at least the voice did pull Annabeth out of her sadness. She raises her eyebrows her way to say you’re an idiot, Seaweed Brain , then grinned and looked down at the floor as she laughed, her eyes lit with sparkle where there was darkness a second ago.

“You know, between this and the baby pictures, you’re just giving me things to make fun of you for next summer.”

“It’s okay,” Percy bobs his head, trying to ignore how full his chest felt with relief. For some reason, he hated seeing Annabeth upset more than most other people. “If you want, you can email me if you think of them sooner.”

“You want me to email you the insults I think of?” Annabeth repeats, shaking her head. “There isn’t enough time in the world for that.”

“Okay, well at least send me a photo of the big sitting president statue,” Percy turns back to the TV and clicks on the movie.

“You mean the Lincoln Memorial?”

“Yeah. You’ve been talking about it at the last four sing-a-alongs. I want to know if you finally got to see it.”

When he looks back, Percy swears Annabeth is trying not to break into a smile. It was getting harder to ignore how full his chest felt. He makes himself turn his eyes away from her as they start the movie, the ocean blue light pouring over her expressive eyes as she scans the screen.

“This is computer animation, right?” She asks thirty seconds in. He quickly glances back to see her eyes and mind moving a million miles an hour, analyzing the kelp, the corral, and the schools of fish in blues, yellows, purples. He could never understand how swiftly Annabeth’s mind worked, but he liked watching the gears turn. That was what he admired about her so much, she was constantly in puzzle-solving mode. He, on the other hand, was constantly counting to make sure he had all the pieces to the puzzle.

“It’s like that game we played in June,” Annabeth’s voice drops to earnest fascination. “The detail looks particularly sophisticated. This probably took years to make, with animators and writers and marine biology researchers..”

“They don’t need marine biologists,” Percy lays back on the couch, finally relaxed now that they had fallen back into their rhythm and got past the awkward part. He pointed to Marvin and Nemo’s swaying purple new home, “I can tell you right now that’s…”

“A sea anemone,” Annabeth finishes a flabbergasted Percy’s sentence. “Actinaria. It’s the perfect home for clownfish because it ensnares predators with its tentacles.”

“How’d you know that?” Percy fake-pouts, mildly insulted. “I’m supposed to be the one with the sea knowledge.”

“Please you should have dealt with this by now,” Annabeth teases, with that prideful, know-it-all twinkle in her eye. “I’m smarter than you.”

Percy grabs a few kernels of popcorn from her bowl and tosses it in Annabeth’s face. She smirks, picks it up from her lap, and throws it back at him. Percy playfully catches one of the kernels in his mouth and winks at Annabeth, who laughs at him for the third time that day.

They continue to tease each other intermittently as Marvin’s journey to Australia begins, his full chest easing into calm and warm. He realizes throughout this is the only time he’s fully been at peace since he left camp a couple days ago, maybe ever since he and Annabeth started really becoming close. When Marvin and Dory cruise on Crush, Percy imitates them again and Annabeth rolls her eyes so hard they spill to the back of her head, but soon she joins in with her own surfer voice that’s far better than his. (“You have a gift,” He tells her as she sits up smugly.)

As the blue of the ocean on the screen turns somber and quiet, Annabeth falls silent while Marvin laments the loss of his son. She fixes her eyes on the scene, sucking on her lip, not responding to Percy when he asks if she wants anymore brownies. Percy’s heart sinks as he watches her, disappointed and crestfallen as she did in the elevator at the Arch.

“Hey, you okay?” Percy instinctively reaches out to touch her shoulder. “When you get quiet like this, it usually means you’re sad.”

Annabeth looks back at him, her vulnerable eyes dark and full, and because it’s because they spent all summer together, or because she’s seeing her dad soon, but she doesn’t evade the question like usual. “Do you think if I was captured in the sea and taken to Australia, my Dad would try to find me?”

She looks like how Percy imagined her that night in the train bunk, sad, lonely, completely unloved. Percy blurts the first thing he can think of.

“Well, that would never happen because I wouldn’t let you get lost.”

Annabeth cocks her head at him. Oh crap, he blushes. He shouldn’t have said that.

“You wouldn’t let me get lost?” She repeats, like he’s implying that she had no directional sense.

“I mean I know you can honestly navigate anywhere, even like, that crazy maze that changes in space in time.”

“You mean Daedulus’ labyrinth.”

“Whatever,” Percy backtracks, trying to think with her melting brown eyes concentrated on him. “I mean you can somehow follow my mind. But if you ever fell in the sea or got captured by a boat, I wouldn’t leave you in there. I would dive right there and fish you back out. Not just you, Grover too.”

Annabeth’s smile lingers as she turns her attention back towards the movie.

“Well it’s nice to know you use your sea power gifts for good use,” She grabs another gummy fish from the table. She’d eaten a lot of those, too. Percy had to make note of that for the next time they watched a movie together. “I wish I could say I could save you from an evil owl or something, but who knows how that would turn out.”

Percy laughs and revels in another flood of relief. Annabeth had unclenched now, her cheeks and legs relaxed as she re-focuses on the screen. He studies her again as he watches the gears grinding in her mind, dissecting the movie at every new scene. He couldn’t believe he wouldn’t see her for a whole other year, except through emails and iris messages.

“Hey,” Percy nudges her when Marvin and Nemo finally reunite. She turns back to him, like she knows he knows the right thing to say to her. “Your dad would save you. I know he would.”

Annabeth beams at him for a moment, then quickly frowns, like she just smelled their downstairs neighbor’s bad lasagna downstairs.

“Hey,” She turns her entire body towards him, as if to tell him something serious. Oh no. Did she smell the neighbor’s lasagna? “You know I don’t actually think I’m smarter than you, you know?” She asks frantically, searching every inch of Percy’s face for reassurance.

Percy blinks, taken aback. He doesn’t know what he was expecting her to say, but it wasn’t that.

“I know,” He says softly, because he does. ‘Don’t worry, I know.”

Slowly, very slowly, they smile at each other, studying each other for maybe just a second too long. They turn back to finish the movie, and Percy thinks about how he knows, just like with Grover, but somehow a little different, that Annabeth is his friend for life.

***

I finally made it, Seaweed Brain. Now tape this to your locker and carry it around.

He rereads the email once, twice, three times. It could be because he’s dyslexic, but he swears he rereads it at least 10 times in the next hour.

Even though he knows she’s just teasing, he does print it out and carry it around with him.

#percabeth #percabeth fic #annabeth chase #percy jackson #pjo #pjo tv show #percy jackon and the olympians #the lightning thief #mine #fic

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whositmcwhatsit · 10 months

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A/N: Thank you as ever to my alpha reader and emotional support hostage @thatbanditqueen. It's been a week, Elvis tumblr, a goddamn mofo of a week. This is the daydream that got me through. This is the beginning of a new WIP.

Chapter One: Not Really A Fan

The wood panelled dressing room was packed with people. Sally recognised a few of the faces from movie and television screens and she tried not to look too intensely in case people realised that she wasn’t supposed to be there.

At least she knew that she wasn’t supposed to be there. Just like she wasn’t supposed to have been sitting in the main showroom a couple of hours earlier surrounded by screaming, whistling fans as they cheered for Elvis, calling out song titles and repeatedly telling him that they loved him.

A door opened to the inner dressing room and the chatter in the room went down to a muted hum as Elvis strode out clad in a black suit with no shirt underneath. He seemed like he towered over everyone, even though he was just regularly tall not statuesque. It was the aura around him that was massive, monstrous even. Sally remembered learning that the Sun pulled all the planets into its orbit because it was so big that its force of gravity was unchallenged. Elvis was a little like that, no one could turn away from him.

Sally watched him do the rounds and started a little as he glanced at her while he was chatting and laughing with Sammy Davis Jr. He sent her a sly look from the corner of his eye, his smirk making her shiver involuntarily. He moved on to a black man in a red suit that looked somewhat familiar to Sally. Possibly another musician, she guessed. Again, Elvis had the man laughing and slapping him on the shoulder like they were best friends. As he threw back his head, Elvis turned his face, just staring at her for a moment, before returning to his conversation.

It felt like forever and also still only a few minutes watching him chat to all his guests, giving a part of himself to everyone who asked. He had completed a wide arc all the way around her, before gradually narrowing the circuit.

Finally, he was standing in front of her, his shoulders down and hips tilted forward, almost like he was about to just topple on top of her. She clenched her jaw at the picture in her head. It felt like they looked at each other for too long, but she couldn’t help herself when she was gifted with such a beautiful face, all shadows and planes, soft lips and long eyelashes. And he was doing the same, staring so long that she started to wonder if she had something on her face.

“You didn’t want a kiss, honey?” Sally blinked and awkwardly looked down at the hand that she had held out to shake his. “All your lil friends came up for a kiss, but not you.”

“Well, we’ve never met,” she replied, immediately regretting it because out loud it sounded far less dry and funny and more like she was a religious grandma. He laughed a little, rubbing the side of his face as he took her in. He finally took her hand, but didn’t shake it, turning it and circling his thumb across the back. Her hand looked tiny and snow white against his long, tanned fingers and she felt like a china doll or an ice sculpture.

“Hello, I’m Elvis Presley, and you are?” he asked, an ironic tilt to his lips, the curves of his cheekbones sculpted against his cheeks.

“Sally Forrest,” she replied, her throat suddenly dry. It felt as though someone had turned off the air conditioning and sealed all the windows; she was hot and breathless staring into his eyes, wondering what it would feel like to have those plush, full lips against hers, or on her skin.

“Pleased to meet you, Sally,” he murmured, lifting her hand to his mouth. Her throat closed and she made a weird growl/grunt at the back of her throat as his hot breath touched her knuckles, too flustered to even register his lips. His heavy-lidded eyes were fixed on her the whole time like she was a game he was about to win.

As he opened his mouth to speak again, a shorter guy touched him on the shoulder and he glanced away. She took in a gasping lung full of air, involuntarily tugging her hand away.

Elvis, in the middle of a low, animated conversation with the man, looked back at her.

“No, man, tell her to stay where she is. I’ll be there- Hey, where you going, honey? We only just met!” Sally smiled apologetically, pausing to let him catch up to her. “You got somewhere better to be?”

“Well, you know there’s Dion and Paul Anka down the strip, and Tom Jones over at the Flamingo,” she replied, smiling to show she was teasing. She thought she had really messed up at first, because his face dropped and he almost glared, before he huffed a laugh just as abruptly, his eyes going back to twinkling.

“Naw, you don’t wanna see those fools, honey, they can’t… entertain you the way that I can. Hey Joe?” His head swivelled, Sally felt tired trying to keep up with everything that was happening. “Joe! Give my friend Sally here some tickets for the next show. She ain’t had a chance to get a kiss yet. And get her number too, man.” Elvis clapped another short but heavier man on the shoulder as he appeared at his side in a suit and tie. “Honey, I gotta go, time waits for no man, but I’m gonna be looking for you later tonight and I’m gonna give you that kiss, all right?” He whirled away in a flurry of motion and, slightly bewildered, Sally turned to the fast, easy smile of his friend.

“How many tickets do you need?” Joe asked, pulling a bundle out of his breast pocket.

“Oh, just the one.”

“Pretty young thing like you all by yourself?” he asked, flashing his canines.

“No, I’m here with my friend, but she’s… otherwise indisposed tonight.” That sounded much nicer than screwing a near stranger in a hotel room.

“Okay, well, just in case your friend disposes herself again.” He handed her a couple of tickets and fished out a little black book from his hip pocket along with a shiny silver pen. “And you’re Sally, right? What’s your number, Sally?”

“Here at the hotel?” She mentally kicked herself for asking such a stupid question.

“Well, that’s a start,” he nodded, smiling again. She wondered what his job description was and whether being the collector of phone numbers of girls Elvis flirted with provided good benefits or job satisfaction.

Sally left before the majority of the crowd packing out the dressing room, even as the men around Elvis were starting to let people know that he would be heading back up to his hotel room to relax before the next show. She thought about calling her friend Laura to see if she was finished with the boy she met by the pool the day before, but then reflected on the fact that missing out seemed like fitting karma for someone who had dropped her on the second day of their vacation when it had been their idea to come to Las Vegas in the first place. So, instead she wandered the casino floor for an hour, sampling the free drinks and losing more of her hard-earned wages in the slot machines.

As it drew closer to midnight, Sally second guessed going back to see Elvis’ show, wondering if she had already peaked by meeting him. She had had such a good time at the dinner show, where she had been adopted by a group of slightly older ladies, who told her that as soon as Elvis walked on stage it would be all over for her.

“You might not be a fan now, sweetie, but when you see him in action you won’t remember who you used to be before.”

They had shared their champagne and even encouraged her to jump in on their group photos, though it was every woman for herself when ‘Love Me Tender’ started and people flooded the tables at the foot of the stage like they were in a ship rapidly sinking.

Sally had watched in amazement as an older lady with steely grey curls in a beehive hoisted herself up on the table and charged the length of it like it was a runway, knocking drinks and lamps flying. Sally had only just managed to grab her glass in time, turning away to prevent herself getting a careless kitten heel to the face, but she was laughing the entire time. It was impossible not to, the atmosphere was so joyful and exciting.

If that had been the dinner show, she couldn’t imagine what she might see at the late show after the drinks had been flowing for a while and inhibitions had been lowered.

The lobby of the hotel was still heaving with couples dressed in their finest heading between the restaurants, the bars and showrooms. The air was thick with smoke, cologne and perfume and the hum of conversation and laughter was just as dense.

Sally surveyed her surroundings, trying not to feel overwhelmed or, worse, look overwhelmed. Las Vegas was not a safe place for a young woman to look vulnerable. It was the last thing Barb, who worked in the loans department, had said as they left early on Friday: “Keep your wits and your pepper spray about you!”

Barb had bought pepper spray for all the unmarried girls at the bank last Christmas, informing them that if they ever thought about using it then they already should have.

Moving to join the queue, Sally wondered if she should have put her pepper spray in her bag. It was still in her suitcase with the bikini she was too shy to wear around the deeply tanned babes by the pool. Rolling her eyes at herself, she caught sight of a girl talking to a man in a fancy shiny tuxedo. The girl looked almost frantic as she spoke, her face pained and her hands gesticulating madly. It was only as the line moved on that Sally caught some of the words. Apparently, the girl couldn’t find her ticket, but she had bought one, she wouldn’t lie about that. Did she look like someone who would just show up without a ticket and try to lie her way in?

The man in the shiny suit obviously worked for the hotel and he looked entirely unmoved by the woman’s plight. In a thick accent, Sally guessed Italian, he was explaining that they couldn’t just replace tickets, especially with no proof of purchase.

“But I bought them here!” the woman insisted. “Get the guy selling the tickets down here and he’ll recognise me for sure! Just ask him!”

Sally paused, arguing with herself for a moment, before she sighed and stepped out of the line.

“Hi,” she said, second guessing herself right up to the last moment. “I think you might have dropped your ticket? I just found it.” She held out the spare second ticket Joe had given her.

The girl’s eyes widened just for a second before she seized upon the moment (and the ticket).

“Yes, that’s it!” She brandished the ticket in Italian tuxedo guy’s face. “See? I told you!” Holding the ticket aloft, she shoved her way into the queue slowly filing towards the double doors, not even pausing to say thank you.

The man sighed and eyed Sally through the large square lenses of his glasses.

“I know you think you did a kind thing,” he informed her. “But she will not last the show. Security will pull her out after ten minutes.”

“I can only do the right thing,” she shrugged. “How people choose to respond is not my business.” His frown deepened momentarily and his eyes narrowed on her.

“Are you a big Elvis Presley fan, Miss?” he asked.

“Someone gave me these tickets,” she admitted, showing hers to him. “I was at the show earlier and got invited backstage by a man called Joe. I don’t know, he was really good- Elvis, that is, not Joe- but I’ve always been more of a Beatles fan, don’t tell anyone.” He gave her a strange grin, teeth dazzlingly white against his dark mahogany tan, as he examined her ticket.

“What is your name?”

“Sally.”

“Pleased to meet you, Sally. My name is Emilio, and this is my hotel. I am the maître de here at the International. If you have any problems, you ask to speak to me.” He held her hand a little too long and she felt a pang, thinking of her pepper spray. “So, let’s take this ticket, I know exactly where you need to sit.”

Tucking her hand into the crook of his arm, he led her through the double doors, ignoring the complaints of the people that had been at the front of the queue.

The perspective of the room made Sally feel a little disorientated as she let herself be led. She was almost glad of Emilio’s arm, because it felt like all the floors were angled, much like the rest of the room, towards the stage. He led her to the booths, red and white like little baskets in a row, and stopped at one right in the centre near the front.

“Here you go, Miss,” he said, beckoning over a waiter.

“Uh, thank you,” she murmured, wondering what she had done to deserve such special treatment. He told the waiter to bring a bottle of champagne and that the lady could have drinks service throughout the show, before giving her a wink and striding away. Again, she longed for the comforting weight of the pepper spray in her purse.

Not long after that, the house lights went down, plunging the showroom into darkness, before the drums took up their frenetic pounding. Sally could feel the beat reverberating in her nervous stomach as the music blared and people were already standing, clapping and whistling at the band.

Even as she was watching these people with a sort of detached interest, Sally was taken aback by the way her stomach swooped up when Elvis strode from the wings and the crowd went wild, the whistling, screaming and clapping nearly drowning out the music. There was no denying the man looked good. Different from the way she remembered him from the movie posters she had walked past in movie theatre lobbies, he was tall, trim and tanned in his white suit, the collar high enough to brush his jet-black hair and sideburns. She could feel her cheeks heating as she was thinking about how she had almost melted in his presence in his dressing room.

As he launched into ‘That’s All Right’, she found herself sinking into some kind of hypnosis, her eyes fixed on the stage and the way his narrow hips moved.

“Good evening, ladies and gentleman,” he said, constantly prowling the stage like a caged tiger. “My name’s Paul Anka.“ This got titters from the crowd, especially when he sang the first couple of lines of ‘Lonely Boy’.

Sally wondered if this was a secret message to her because of her joke earlier, but quickly dismissed herself as delusional. She had been one face of a hundred squeezed into that dressing room. She dismissed the thought and, for the next hour and fifteen minutes, had very few others.

Whether it was because she was on her own and had no distractions from the action taking place on the stage, or whether he had actually upped his game even further after the incredible dinner show, she could hardly take her eyes off the stage. She couldn’t understand how he still had so much energy to flex and kick and thrust his hips, over and over and over… She had to take a gulp of champagne as her mouth suddenly became very dry.

When the first notes of ‘Love Me Tender’ started up, Sally was overwhelmed by emotions to the point where her skin felt hot and tight just trying to contain them. It was impossible to parse them, she only knew that she had to stand up. Then, an invisible rope was tugging at her, and she almost tripped over her own feet as she tottered down towards the stage.

She had no idea how she made it through the press of bodies, ducking towering hairstyles and waving hands, but somehow she found herself at the foot of the stage, wedged in with the other girls who had pushed between the occupants of the trestle tables there.

The song had been going on for a while by then and some people were losing their patience, particularly a few of the male patrons who had begun to clap, loudly.

Elvis moved away from the corner of the stage where women were climbing up to wind their arms around his neck and lose themselves in his sweaty neck and rumpled collar and stepped backwards towards the centre, standing in profile as he prepared to wrap up the song with his usual karate moves.

Sally had missed her chance, she realised with a suffocating sense of disappointment. Twice she had had the opportunity to kiss that luscious mouth and she had failed both times. Though it hadn’t seemed possible at the beginning of the evening, she thought the regret would gnaw on her bones.

At the last minute, Elvis yelled off mic, bringing the band together, but then turned his head towards where she was standing. His eyebrows raised suddenly and he smirked, holding up a hand to force the band to hold that last note even as he jogged over and slid onto one knee right in front of her.

“Goddamn, you were cutting it close!” he mumbled to her, holding the mic by his knee. He angled his face, some rivulets of sweat dripped from his jaw onto her decolletage, and pressed his pillowy lips to hers. The touch of his skin against hers was searing, she had to force herself not to flinch and yet also not to surge forward and entwine her arms around him like some of the other more excitable women. He slowly drew up, his hand still raised above his head, grasping control of the band and that deafening note, but quickly ducked down again and gave her another, sloppier open-mouthed kiss, before executing a series of punches and kicks that were captured in coloured flashing lights across the stage.

Sally blinked, finding herself gaping up at him even as he was moving into another song, and as she turned away she locked eyes with another woman sitting at one of the long tables, who raised her eyebrow and gave her an impressed nod.

At the end of the show, after joining the lengthy standing ovation, Sally was disappointed when Joe didn’t appear again with his slippery smile and easy familiarity. It was just as Elvis had said, she had been invited to the show to get her kiss, that was it.

A heaviness in her gut, she trailed out of the showroom. There was no sight of Emilio the maître de either. It was almost as if her carriage had turned back into a pumpkin.

Back in her room, she tiptoed in to find Laura’s bed rumpled, unmade but empty, and hers thankfully untouched. She lay in it later, unable to close her eyes because every time she did, she saw Elvis with his leg astride, the lights flashing as he thrashed to the song ‘Tiger Man’. She wasn’t sure why it was that song playing over and over, but she couldn’t stop it.

Eventually, she fell into a light, unhappy sleep, the feeling of emptiness accompanying her into her dreams. She found herself wandering across desolate landscapes chasing after something she couldn’t name, which was always just out of reach and sight.

It was almost a relief when the trilling of the phone pierced the fog and sent her crashing back down into reality, tangled in her sheets and shivering and croaky from the air conditioning.

“Hello?”

“Hi there, can I speak to Sally?”

“Um, speaking.”

“Hey, Sally, it’s Joe, Joe Esposito, we met earlier. Sorry I didn’t recognise your voice. I guess you must sound different on the phone.”

“I was asleep. What time is it?”

“Um, just gone four I guess. Anyway, Elvis wanted me to give you a call and invite you down to the show tomorrow night. Or tonight now, I guess.”

Recognition throbbed in Sally, wrenching her awake, the recognition that there was more to come. The show hadn’t been the end of it the way that her brain had been telling her but her gut had been denying.

“Oh, sure, that sounds like fun!” she said, cringing at the eagerness in her voice.

“Well, that’s great. I’ll have the tickets waiting for you at the ticket office. Oh no, wait a minute, I-“ There was the sound of fumbling and all the heat in Sally’s body swept down her spine as a soft, low voice came on the line.

“Hey, honey, I told ya you’d get your kiss, but you sure kept me on my toes there.”

She couldn’t help it, she grinned idiotically into the darkness.

“Well, you didn’t see what I had to go through to get to the stage!” she replied. “I think most of those women had been training for that moment for a while.” He laughed, that inimitable hiccupping chuckle that made her envision his sparkling eyes and sculpted cheekbones.

“Yeah, it can get crazy down there, boy,” he agreed. “I’m glad you made it though. You must be tougher than you look, itty bitty girl like you.”

“No, not really. I think I was just fortunate. It’s been a lucky night altogether actually. I’m not sure I’m going to believe any of this happened when I wake up in the morning.”

“Well, it’s already mornin’ practically,” he pointed out, his smile audible in his voice. “And I plan on making sure you believe it when I see you, baby.”

“I’ve been pinching myself on the arm and that didn’t work.”

“Oh no, I won’t be pinching you, honey, and it won’t be on your arm.” His voice went low at the end and her skin tingled even as her pulse quickened in all parts of her body. “What did you think of the show?”

“Oh, it was amazing! You must hear that all the time though.”

“Don’t matter, I never heard it from you before. I’m glad you liked it, enough to show up for round two anyway.”

“And round three tomorrow,” she reminded him, beaming at the ceiling as she writhed on the mattress.

“Oh yeah, we’ll have a good ole bout tomorrow for sure.” She giggled at his conspiratorial tone and was charmed by the way that he joined in, like they were little kids planning mischief. “How long are you planning on being here, honey?”

“Oh, we’re here the whole week. We flew in the day before yesterday I think now. It’s tomorrow now, right?”

“Mmmhmm. Okay, I’m glad we got plenty of time, I got a whole lotta things I wanna do to- I wanna show you.”

“Like what?” she murmured, feeling her breath quickening as her hand trailed down her ribs and stomach.

“Uh uh, it’s a surprise. I wanna show you.”

“Well, in that case, I should probably get some beauty sleep. I want to have as much energy as possible for tonight.”

“Yeah, you’re gonna need it…” She rolled her eyes at his tone and he seemed to realise it without even seeing her face, rapidly changing tone and approach. “Really now, I-I think that tonight was lucky for both of us, honey. I feel real glad I met you, you know. And this is where you say it back, by the way, just lettin’ you know.”

“Of course I’m glad I met you,” she chided. “And I know I’ll feel even gladder when I’ve had some sleep. Good night, Elvis.”

“Good night, darlin’, sweet dreams.”

The sweetness in his soft voice as well as the natural command in it almost guaranteed that her dreams after she fell asleep for the second time that night were sweeter than molasses.

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