#so I guess this kind of posting can still be necessary on tumblr :p

[beingatoaster]

Twenty (Fic) Questions

nabbed from @kidlightnings

1. How many works do you have on AO3? Total, 110 (they are not all on main).

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 881,798

What fandoms do you write for?

Largely Genshin Impact, some Voltron, and then occasional other fandoms now and then.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Storm Shelter, Child Soldiers, All of Our Secrets, A Study of Love, and A Convenient Facade

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

On main, I almost always do! I hope it encourages people to comment more (on other peoples' fics as well as mine) and I'm always excited when people tell me they like things I wrote and like to thank them for the compliment! I also secretly always hope it is going to lead to a conversation and/or eventual Friends. :>

On the porn alt... well, I made it a policy when I first created it that I was not required to reply to every comment there, in part because it's not what I'm usually logged in to, and since I have also gotten comments there that make me grateful for that policy.

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

There is a whole series on the porn alt that is just like 'what if everything was terrible, actually,' in which most of the fics would qualify, especially the second one.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Kind of hard to say! I think most of my fics end more happily than not? Even going for 'particularly mushy' I can't narrow it down to less than five, which is more than I want to link, so. XD

Do you get hate on fics?

I have not had any on main! See the question about the comment-response policy in regards to the porn alt (where I also allow myself to delete comments if necessary). In the awkward space in between, I have a series on-main-but-posted-on-anon that has gotten some... interesting responses.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I refer you here to the existence of the porn alt. XD It's pretty much all either kinky or... IDK, I am apparently too ace to write sex for sex's sake, and I'm not sure 'kinky' covers 'there are complex emotional situations here to which the sex is important and yet also incidental,' but, yeah. Kinky mostly covers it, and even if it's in a series so far it's all PWPs.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I haven't written crossovers themselves since my early 2000's fic days, but I do a lot of fusions--all of them are currently isolated on Tumblr, in one place or another. I like to mash any universe I particularly like together with the Sekirei 'winging' system (one group of people can kiss another group of people to give them magic powers and also symbolic but non-functional wings, oh, and also there's an empathic connection and subtle mind control), which I guess could count as 'craziest' but honestly feels to me like what everyone was doing with Loveless when Loveless was big. I just happened to read Sekirei instead of Loveless. XD

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't know but, likewise, have never looked!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Someone in the Genshin fandom translated Filial Assistance and Lost and Found into Russian once, and I'm still pretty thrilled about it! :D

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Honestly, I don't even know where to start narrowing that down, though TBH it would definitely be for a fandom I haven't written for (since the early 2000s, anyway, if I tried I might end up back on Livejournal). Joke answer: the Normandy. :P

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

There is some D&D OC fic that I refuse to list for this, because someday I will finish them. I swear. I still love them and I want to go back....

In lieu, a style experiment/cumulative writing exercise (in the Genshin Impact fandom) in which, pre-canon, Jean has a sexuality crisis and hooks up with Lisa and Eula, while un-hooking-up with Kaeya, written in 'layers' with everything written from Jean's POV first, then scenes added in from Eula's, then Lisa's, then possibly Kaeya's (though I think if I ever did try to finish it to "publishable" status it honestly might work better with his left out, and another follow-up written later that starts with his POV and layers in reverse, which is a moot point as I genuinely do not expect to "finish" this). It's currently still in the "Jean's POV" stage and as stands can be, and has been, described as "technically this is a Jean/Kaeya breakup story except that the breakup is the least important thing happening here." I keep determinedly having to detach Background Political/Mystery Plot.

What are your writing strengths?

I likewise consider myself good at worldbuilding when I don't get too tedious about it! I've had positive comments on my prose and pacing, which is funny because I know and lean into deep purple with the prose and pacing is one of my biggest struggles, so. XD I can't really say accurately from within!

What are your writing weaknesses?

Pacing is hell and the worst part of revisions and second drafts. I often stuff a whole bunch of stuff I just don't want to write into an eliding paragraph or a hole between scenes and don't always fix that in revision. I'm infinitely distractable and everything takes so much longer than I expect. I struggle very badly to stay concise. I'm sure readers could list others, but those are the ones that ping internally!

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Honestly, only something I will do with conlangs. A narrative "[Character] said something in [language]" or an italicized translation both suit me better.

First fandom you wrote for?

Also Pokemon! And I likewise wish I still had the stories. :( The first place where I encountered the concept of fanfiction (instead of writing OCs and situations very similar to whatever books I was reading at the time) was on a Pokemon site, it's also where I published my first fic, and I really badly miss my first fandom friend, who drew me fanart and whom I meant to give a cameo (except that I never wrote past chapter 7 and then the site went down and we lost touch).

Favorite fic you've written?

You make me choose between my 110 (+ the Livejournal-era dozens) children? ;o; But okay, fine. I could pick any of several I'm very pleased with, for various reasons, and the Genshin ones are the most recent and thus probably technically the best, but (leaving out the Livejournal-era fic that I am not going through tonight XD but might contain something), it's Dressed to Suit.

Tagging... anyone who would like to do this! I should've gone to bed half an hour ago and certainly don't have the brainpower to remember who on my dash writes and likes memes about it, but if that includes you, please feel free. :>

#i archived most of the lj-era stuff on a third separate ao3 account recently #but i'm not counting any of it in any of this stuff because like. it's old. it's bad. i archived it for nostalgia's sake #and also i really don't want to go through all of it for the sake of this XD #meme #fanfiction #long post

[araiz-zaria]

Meet the Shermans ー A closer look on the family portrait

#so I guess this kind of posting can still be necessary on tumblr :p #drawing #illustration #manga #original art #traditional art #fan art #drawing pen #william tecumseh sherman #maria ewing sherman #ellen ewing sherman #mary elizabeth sherman #thomas ewing sherman #eleanor mary sherman #rachel ewing sherman #do you find it hilarious that at one point uncle billy and tommy were the only boys in the house XD #william t sherman #minnie sherman #wt sherman #uncle billy #auntie ellen #meet the shermans 😏 #1860s fashion #1866 to be exact 😏 #1866 #...also I gave too much stink eye on uncle billy 😆

[ja0-s-blank-canvas-fic]

Part 2 - Chapter 49 - Leap Into Action

Blank Canvas Part 2

AO3 - here

Fanfiction.net - here

Heyo, dear readers! This update we're back in Izuku's pov which I'm so happy about. Katsuki's just...hurts. Necessary according to my brain but still rough to get through. But! We've got some fluff to balance that out this chapter and Izuku being awesome. ;)

Warning for teasing this chapter. It's kind of sprinkled in here and there but I'll point out the bigger chunks. From "Doing alright there..." to "I can see that..". In that chunk there are some parts that aren't teasing and pertain to a certain green bean's feelings but I'll let you read at your on discretion. Another is at "That's quite the..." but it's not too bad to me. Just in case though.

Linktree to all the things!

End notes for the chapter are under the line.

Izuku wins his round of All Might's assessment test! :D I did do a random number generator thing similar to the Battle Training for 1-B back in part one for this. Not as intense of research since we're more familiar with 1-A's quirks and skills. But in the show we really only get to see Izuku's round. Which of course he's going to be a badass and win. Take that, Dumb Might! Anyway, we'll get to see the rest of 1-A's assessments next chapter. Let's give everyone their due.

Eijirou is conflicted and Izuku knows that. It's going to take time for everyone to sort through all this mess. But at least our resident sunshine rock boy knows he has someone he can talk to. Yay support from friends!

We've got an update to Izuku's costume! And guess what? It comes with a new drawing! :D Which has been posted to the tumblr here. Also sh-sh-shout out to Remember123 for pointing out that Izuku and Hitoshi both have an X on their hero costume similar to Bakugou in a previous chapter. I did not realize this myself but it's so true. XD Anyway, this at least has Bakugou's initial reaction to it but it may pop up later in a future Katsuki pov. We'll see. :P

So. All Might wants to apologize. We'll see how that goes. But you can at least rest assured that Izuku won't be alone with him. Aizawa, as always, has his back.

Fun Facts About Japan:

This is more of a grammar one about the congratulatory sash that All Might gives the winners. The sash reads 助けてくれてありがとう ( たすけてくれてありがとう , tasuketekurete arigatou) when Sero wins in canon. It uses the verb tasukeru ( 助ける , たすける ) meaning 'to help/save/rescue/assist' etc. and conjugates it into it's て (te) form. て form helps link phrases, asking people to do something for you, and just so many other applications that are too many to list here. But anyway, 助けて is joined with くれて (kurete) which is くれる (kureru) in its て form and means 'to give/let one have/do something for someone' essentially. くれる is used to express that you as the speaker are receiving an action from another. You can use it with other verbs with "Verb + て + くれる" in various conjugations which more just states that the speaker received the action like 'mom baked me cookies'. Or you could use "Verb + て + くれて" with the て form twice to express more of a sense of thanks like 'thanks mom for baking me cookies'. And then there's ありがとう (arigatou) tacked on for extra politeness. So essentially 助けてくれてありがとう means 'thanks for your help' or 'thanks for doing me the favor of helping me'. At least as far as I understand so if any of that is wrong, let me know. :)

That's all for this update! We've got the rest of the assessment groups next chapter and then All Might's apology. We'll just have to see how that goes. But again, Izuku will not be alone. Hobo man will not let anyone hurt his the kid. Anyhoo, thanks for reading and hope your year is going well so far! Let me know of typos/weirdness and have a great day!

#mha #bnha #quirkless au #fanfic #blankcanvasfic #blankcanvasconvictions #midoriya izuku #todoroki shouto #shinsou hitoshi #bakugo katsuki #kirishima eijirou #sero hanta #ashido mina #kaminari denki #all might #yagi toshinori #pro hero eraserhead #aizawa shouta

[mazerunnersecretsanta]

IT’S THAT TIME OF THE YEAR AGAIN: TMR SECRET SANTA 2020!! We know it feels like summer’s still going strong, but nevertheless, it’s time to get our secret santa going again!

Welcome, tmr fans old and new, to our TMR Secret Santa 2020!

Last year’s tmrss was so much fun and we’re so excited to run it again! Can’t wait to see all kinds wonderful tmr content emerge from it - fanfic, fanart, gifsets, manips/edits, fanvids… Just the kind of gift exchange we like to see!

You may be familiar with Secret Santas and how they work but, just in case, here is what will be happening:

Sign up for the Secret Santa by filling out our sign-up form. The information you give us in your sign-up form will be the deciding factor in both what kind of gift you’re going to create and what kind of gift you’re going to receive, so please make sure you read and fill it in carefully! You can specify favourite characters and ships etc. - or any that you don’t want to be featured in your gift, or don’t want to create for yourself.

You will then be matched with a giftee, for whom you will create your gift, according to their own Secret Santa wishes :))

Once you have finished making your gift, you will submit it to us via email or, if necessary, via a file sharing platform.

We will post all the gifts on this blog during the week running between Christmas Day (25th Dec) to New Year’s Eve (31st Dec) for your recipient (and for the fandom) to enjoy. Have fun perusing all the beautiful new content and, if you like, making your guesses, but please maintain secrecy, that’s part of the fun!

The big Secret Santa reveal will take place on 5th Jan, when we will post a list of all the Santas involved and tell you who created which gift.

After that, you’re free to post the gift you created anywhere else (your own tumblr, your lj etc.).

——————————————————————————

Now, we all love a good deadline, so here is the timeline for the Secret Santa:

1st September - Signups are now open!

27th September - Signups close

11th October - Secret Santa assignments sent out

13th December - Gifts due in

25th December - Gifts start being posted on our blog

5th January - the Big Secret Santa Reveal!

       ——————————————————————————

This is going to be so fun! We’d love to have lots of tmr fans getting together to brighten our fandom and each other’s festive periods with these gifts, so please sign up, share, reblog, tell your friends – however you want to do it, tell your friends and spread the word :D Let’s show tmr some love!

If you want to be a part of the exchange, but are unsure whether you’ll be able to commit, then there are options to become either a Pinch Hitter (someone who makes a gift, possibly at short notice, if a santa drops out or is otherwise unable to complete their gift) or a Beta Reader - details about this can be found here.

You can find more info, and the rules and guidelines, in the top bar on our main page, and make sure to follow this blog so you can keep up to date with all the latest news and announcements.

Please don’t hesitate to get in touch if you have any questions! :)

Have fun!!!!

Dreams and Bridge 🎅🎁

#tmredit #the maze runner #tmrss #dobedit #tbsedit #tmrss2020 #mazerunnersecretsanta #dylan obrien #kaya scodelario #ki hong lee #newtmasedit #newtmas #thomesa #yes I know i'm tagging heaps and they're not overly relevant but we need the reach! #don't judge me guys! #deal with it

[tothetoonandback]

idk what the buffy-ship-wars are like on tumblr, but this is from someone who is on imstagram- it gets EXTREMELY aggressive and just like 😟😟😟😟😟what! people were blocking others cause “you don’t like season 6 spuffy???????😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡”

so here’s me being Angry. as far as that goes. I’m using numbers so my brain doesn’t explode here we go

(also, for clarification, i will b passive aggressive and it’ll look like i’m just hating on these ships [which i kind of am—] but i am in NO way tryna put y’all buffy shippers down!!!! if you don’t wanna read then you don’t need 2 :])

1. both bangel and spuffy (we aren’t gonna talk abt biley cause it. no☺️there’s no reason to) had their own faults, and while they DID have pros, their faults were still Visible.

bangel, for one, was just ??? very creepy??? and yes, it has some very cute scenes, but overall it was just a bit odd. and that’s mostly on how buffy, the Vampire Slayer’s, first boyfriend is huge, overly protective, a vampire, and over like 200 years old. yeah yeah “but it doesn’t matter with vampires, cause they look around the same age!!” that’s the thing!!!!! he looked like. 20!!! she was 15/16!!! and for a “girl power” show that’s JUST starting w a mysterious, older, overly protective and extremely strong vampire, that just defeats the purpose. plus, angel was kinda absent, if y’all didn’t realize

spuffy. Good lord. ok spuffy is great (in it’s own way???) i guess but season 6 has Really clouded my senses for them. spike just went “awooga woman” all of a sudden and started being creepy. then he had buffy-bot (Barf) and then “Seeing red”. and for sure, buffy wasn’t any better (she wasn’t as bad, but she was still pretty demeaning), but spike was just a full out creep. (Creep by radiohead plays)). and honestly?? in season 7, he chilled out a bit and honestly i liked them better as just good friends. because YES, they could help each other, because they understood each other. also, their little scenes in the finale made me cry. so

2. buffy was literally MEANT to be a girl empowerment show!!!! yeah, a girl can totally still b independent w a lover/love interest, but the whole Show should not be surrounded by that—

bangel, i understand sorta, cause it led up to Angelus and his arc. i can see that. but when spike turned to buffy in season 5 (i think it was season 5 fjsjfndn) it was. kind of unnecessary- again, i think they would’ve been better off platonic. hell, make them platonic soulmates if you want!!! put that magic, cool fantasy shit on instead of just plain romantic! but it wasn’t necessary for the actual big bad plot, and therefore i don’t think it was COMPLETELY necessary for the general plot

buffy is entirely independent though! without the scoobies and everyone, i believe she would get along swimmingly. minus the intense therapy and extreme mental problems, she could pull off a good sweep of vamps on her own!!! rereading this paragraph put me through the 5 stages of grief!

3. I don’t really have a three. I’m not very good with essays

anyway. THAT’S IT. I’M SO SORRY FOR THE LONG POST I JUDT HAVE MANY THOUGHTS and this might even b incomprehensible and some info might b wrong, but that’s just how the cookie crumbles. Also, major respect to spuffy+bangel shippers who can realize the faults of those ships ilove you /p

#btvs #buffy the vampire slayer #buffy summers #spike #angel #these bitches need last names to specify their media #also i’m gonna keep apologizing for this LOL dm that i’m just. #also also i’m aroace so that just might be. where these feelings come from ($/&;!!: #moon chit chat #long post

[phantomofsilence]

Title : Stuck Between A Rock And A Hard Place

Word Count : Honestly who the hell knows?

Warning : Sad Bucky, sad Steve, you can see it from the request.

A/N :

Alright so i already posted this request but Tumblr somehow deleted it. So i had to do it all over again. Well thankfully not the story, i fortunately wrote it in the notes, i learned that lesson the hard way. Anyway along with a story the request itself was deleted. So i think this is how the request went, if it was your request message me if it was wrong. Also i had a really hard time with this request, i don't know why i just wasn't inspired, well probably more tired from college than inspired, but that's why it took so long. I wanted to do it right. Also for anyone else who send me a request i saw it, and i will right it as soon as my obligations allow me some free time. Also i did the P. O. V. thing so don't get confused. Okay, enough rambling, i hope you like it. And also i believe there was a compliment in the request for gif usage, thank you for that. 😘😘😘❤️

Request : Can you do a fic where you and the new agent are getting closer to the point where the team suspects that you are falling out of love with Bucky? (angst to fluff).

Steve's P. O. V.

As soon as he saw her enter the kitchen Chris was out of his seat smothering her in a hug, but Natasha and Steve, hung back and watched with frowns on their faces.

They stayed quiet during their conversation occasionally sipping coffee.

Their stubbornness and Steve's persistence in making sure both him and the team stay out of this complicated and deeply personal situation, rendered them mute, as they stood there cold and stoic, as they sipped on their coffee.

Many would say the intimacy in the embrace, those gentle smiles, and completely unnecessary gazes they were curently being subjected to were highly inappropriate and Steve would have to agree with them.

The more he watched, the more sorry he felt for his friend. But no, Steve wasn't angry at her, he was hurt. How could such a sweet girl be so uncaring? No one deserves this kind of treatment, his friend the least. He's been through so much already, Steve thought you out of all people understood this.

He lost so much, did he have to lose you too?

You were the rock that kept thing moving, a force anyone could fall back on if needed to be. And you want to abandon it all, for this Chris, a man you barely know compared to his friend.

Steve knew he was letting his feelings cloud his judgement, and you haven't really done anything but spent time with a man you claimed was your friend, a man that was your partner. He knew he spent just as much, if not more time with Natasha and she was one of his most valued friends.

Also, Chris seemed like a nice guy, the kind of man if you were still single he'd advise you to go for.

But that's it, you weren't single. In fact you were in a committed relationship with the most important person in his life.

He was stuck between a rock and a hard place, and he didn't know what to do. Invade his best friend's privacy or let his best friend be hurt when he could at least cushion the blow.

One more look at the 'lovely couple' and he decided, privacy be damned, his friend deserves honesty at least and he was gonna make sure he got it for him.

"Steve.." a voice trailed off cautiously, he looked over the see Natasha leaning on the counter facing them, with her head turned towards him looking at him.

"I know, Nat." he knew he shouldn't have snapped, it wasn't her fault. She sighed.

"Steve it should be one of us, I know it sucks to hurt him like that, but it's even worse if he caught them, and we knew but didn't tell him."Like always the redhead was right, but he still tried to reason with her.

"But she hasn't done anything yet Natasha, we can't make things up when they didn't happen."

She rolled her eyes at his statement. "Yes, Steve, she hasn't done anything, yet Steve. The key word being yet. Come on, Steve! They've known each other for only two months, and they are joined at the hip. If you think Bucky didn't notice you are mistaken. Dude's been giving her the kicked puppy eyes for days now and she hasn't even noticed choosing to ogle at her new beau. This calls for revenge! "The redhead took a deep breath and said.

" He is your best friend Steve, if the rolls were reversed wouldn't you like him to say something? "

Steve didn't respond, it wasn't necessary, they both knew the answer. Instead of pushing him, Natasha gently squeezed his shoulder and left him in the kitchen to think it over.

An hour later Steve was letting out his anger on a punching bag. The more he thought about it, the more conflicted he got.

This wasn't his relationship but it was his friend. Thou you were his friend too, after Peggy's death you along with Natasha were there for him, hell you've spent the whole day making jokes just to make him forget.

You were like Bucky, the Bucky from before, not just before The Winter Soldier, but before the war. The guy that got him in a lot of trouble and the guy that stood by him and protected him when he took a bite too large to swallow.

The man that took him to many unsuccessful dates, his companion, his family, it's what drew him to you.

You were a sense reality in the world that no longer made sense, a familiar face in a strange place.

Although he wanted to protect his friend, he also felt oddly protective of you. He couldn't betray your trust, but he couldn't betray Bucky either.

Why did this has to be so hard? He thought and punched the punching bag so hard it ripped and fell few feet away.

"What did that punch bag ever do to you?" Said a man Steve was successfully avoiding since this morning.

"Oh, hey Buck. What's up?" he said trying to act nonchalant. "I could ask you the same thing. Why are you avoiding me? Did i do something?" Bucky demanded.

"I'm not avoiding you." Steve mildly shrugged. Glaring at him he got closer almost to his face. "What the hell is going on?"

Steve could hear the anger in his voice, but also hurt, trying to protect him he's the one that ended up hurting him.

"Nothing, Buck." Steve said. "Listen here, punk!

"It's bad enough the love of my life could possible be cheating on me right now, now i can't even trust you!? What the hell man?"

Steve looked at his best friend, his eyes were puffy, tears threatening to spill, but he refused to let them fall, he had dark bags under his eyes, he hasn't been sleeping well, his hands shaking in anger, this was a man already hurt.

"Look i wanted to tell you about her, but I didn't want to betray her either so I've been ignoring you both so i don't hurt anyone. I guess that ship sailed." He said, his friend deserved honestly at least he can get it from him.

"You think she's cheating on me?" asked Bucky. "I don't know, man. I did not see her so anything, from all we know we're just making stuff up."

Steve frowned, even thou he shouldn't do it now, he was defending her. "You're a good friend, Steve. But i didn't ask what you saw, i want a yes or no answer." Bucky said.

"Why do i matter, why are you asking me? If you really wanted to know you'd ask her. But you're asking me because you know i will never give you that answer. So why are you asking me, Buck?" Steve demanded.

Bucky glared at him, before he grabbed his shoulder giving him a smile." You're a punk, kid."Bucky said, paused to inhale and exhale before continuing." It's because i don't really wanna know. I love her, Steve. If fact i love her so much that even thou, she 's literally ripping me in half, my brain is still finding a reason to forgive her. That she loves me and it's all a mistake. I'm pathetic."

Bucky lowered his head, squeezed his shoulder again, let go and turned to leave.

At the door Steve voice halted him in place.

" You're not pathetic. You love her. Knowing you my whole life, you were never soft on a dame like that. I'm sorry it had to be like this."

Without turning around Bucky whispered. "Me too." And left.

Steve could see it bright as day this man was a mess. He had to do something, you might be his friend, and it wasn't his business , but he was about to confront you.

Steve knew you, you were not a coward.

He would get you to tell the truth, perhaps it wasn't too late. You need to be honest and you might even work it out with Bucky.

Taking his phone out of his pocket he texted you to meet him in his room.

Your P. O. V.

After the workout Chris suggested you go to the diner you always go after a successful mission.

"Come on it's been some time since we been there." Snorting at that statement you replied. "We literally went there two days ago."

Groaning Chris whined. "Exactly, too long, come on i know you can practically taste those fries and that strawberry and vanilla milkshake you like. Eh, it will be fun and if i may say so i make great company."

Although the offer was tempting, and you really could taste those fries and that delicious milkshake, you had to go home to your boyfriend.

You missed him so much, and judging by those sad eyes he's been giving you he missed you just as much, if not more.

The missions you were being sent on this past month left little to no time for your relationship, and now having to prepare for an undercover mission of great importance and you weren't allowed to speak about it with anyone according to Maria, you were forced to spend all your free time with Chris.

Well forced was a harsh word, Chris was a great man and an amazing partner, but he wasn't your boyfriend.

"Sorry gotta take a rain check." You mumbled apologetically. Chris smiled and pulled you in for a hug.

"Hey i get it, if i had a hunk like that waiting for me at home, i wouldn't even bother talking to you. Scram, kid." You arched an eyebrow on chuckling. "Is that so? "

"I'd fuck him."

As you were nearing your apartment your phone buzzed. Looking at the screen you saw you had a text from Steve. Opening it read' We need to talk, met me at my place'.

Steve was not the best texter but he never sounded this urgent and formal. If this was about the mission he would have asked meat at The Tower, this was personal.

Something was wrong.

All it took was three knocks to be met with Steve's hard gaze, he stood aside allowing you to come in.

"So we need to talk?Are you breaking up with me Steve?"A light-hearted joke that was meant to brighten the mood was met with a glare. Okay, not the right crowd.

"Listen, i know it's non of my business and you're my friend, but this needs to end. What the hell is going on with you and Chris? "

Steve asked firmly before placing his hands on his belt buckle. You knew that stance, you've seen it a million times, it was meant to frighted and send a message that he met business.

You never thought you's see it being used on you. But you weren't so easily scared.

"You're right, Steve it's non of your business ." You replied defensively. Who was he thinking he could question you?

"You're right, but i don't care. I'm the one who has to watch my friend heartbroken when you leave with Chris, so excuse me if I'm a little protective. Just don't. Own up to it." Steve said.

"Own up to what, Steve? Heartbroken? My Bucky? What the hell is going on?" You demanded. You have done nothing to Bucky. What the hell is he talking about?"You hurt him and..." Steve began but you cut him off. "Hurt him i haven' t even spoken to him!" You piped up.

"Exactly."

Bucky's P. O. V.

Knowing he couldn't stay cupped up in his room with all those thoughts swearing in his head Bucky decided to take a walk, and by walk he meant a run, muttering angry at nothing and panting wildly.

He wasn't sure if he was panting because he was tired from the aggressive run or the work his mind put him through.

He decided the latter.

As if he was cursed to suffer today, he ran into the last person he wanted to see. Chris strolled up to him, a bright smile on his face, as if he wasn't the cause to his misery. Some nerve on this guy!

"Hey, Buck right?" he said to Bucky holding his hand for him to shake. Bucky just looked down at it frown.

"Not a hand shaker? Alright, i get it. I'm getting used on it myself.Also some say it's unhygienic."

What pissed of Bucky even more was that Chris wasn't even fazed by Bucky unfriendly stance. This guy!

"Anyway i just wanted to meet the man my partner won't shut up about. I mean that woman's got you on a pedestal you'd think your shooting rainbow out of your ass."

Keep rubbing salt to an open wound, Bucky though. This dude was something else.

"Look man, i don't really know her for that long, but she's kinda grown on me. She's one heck of a woman. She means a lot to me and... " Bucky cut him of. "I can imagine." He remarked through his teeth.

"No, you really can't, she has been there for me after the war, you know when you get back everyone keeps walking on egg shells around you, it's a strange place, even the bed feels wrong, too soft. But she made me feel human."

Suddenly the anger for the man was gone and all that was left was confusion. Chris was a marine? It would explain his posture.

" She's not afraid to hold me, i thank God or whatever is out there everyday for a friend like her. "

Bucky knew what he was talking about oh to well, she made him fell the same. She was comfort, she was peace, she was his home.

" Why are you telling me all of this? "Bucky asked.

" Because I'm not blind, i know a jealous man when i see one. She holds me because it helps me relax, not because she is in love with me. Don't even try to deny it. I know what it feels to love her, but you know what it feels like to be loved by her. If anyone has the right to be jealous, it's me. Don't screw this up, man. See ya. "

Before Bucky even had the chance to process what Chris had said, he turned and ran the other way.

Walking into your room you felt oddly nervous. You didn't even know it but you've made the man you love, a man in doubt.

He now questioned your love and you did not even notice. Sure you saw a bit of sadness but regarded it as him simply missing you.

Not a man heartbroken and riddled with insecurities. He probably hasn't even slept right and you didn't see it.

There was no reason for your fear, the room was empty, no Bucky in sight. Footsteps in the hallway made you turn around. Walking out of the room you followed the footsteps into the hallway, outside your apartment, down the stairs and only when you were outside did you catch the glimpse of the man of our.

Gathering enough courage you called out Bucky who at the sound of your voice turned and froze.

The tension was high, you could feel it in the air as you stared at one another.

Just as you opened your mouth to speak not even knowing what to say Bucky crossed the distance, grabbed you by the back of your neck and kissed you.

It only took you a second to respond, the kiss was desperate, teeth clashing, tongues fighting for dominance, while hands roamed all over, pulling, squeezing.

Pulling away for air you kept your eyes closed. "Tell me you love me." Pleaded Bucky, making you feel even more guilty.

Opening your eyes your hands sneaked themselves around his neck pulling until your forehead touched his own.

"I'm not sure about a lot of things Bucky. But there is one thing i am sure about and that is that i love you, James Buchanan Barnes, i love you and i always will. I'm sorry i ever made you doubt my love. "

"No, i am the one that's sorry. I shouldn't have doubted you in the first place. I got so stuck in my own head. I'm sorry. I love you so much, doll."

"I love you. Let's just forget about it and agree that from now on we will talk about this things. No holding back. "

"You're right. From now, we talk. But please be patient with me. And do me a favor, will you."

"Anything."

"Don't quit on me. I know it can be hard to be with me sometimes, but I love you as much it is possible for this broken man to love. "

"You're not broken, just bent. And don't act like I'm a walk in the park, i know i can be frustrating. But this is a relationship, we work together, we compromise, we fight, we make love. We don't quit on each other, we fight for us."

"I love you."

"And i love you."

#avengers imagine #avengers x reader #avengers #avengers imagines #mcu #mcu imagine #mcu imagines #mcu x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagines #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes fanfiction #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes #the winter soldier x you #the winter soldier imagine #the winter soldier imagines #the winter soldier x reader #the winter soldier #the winter soldier one shot #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan imagines #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan #sebastian stan one shot #sebastian stan fanfiction #imagine bucky barnes

[acrobaticcatfeline]

Logan and His Little Bumble Bee (Single Dads AU) Chapter 4!!!

Word Count: 3643

TW: swearing, deceit, vague mentions of vague trauma, arguments, crying, unconscious projecting, one quick mention of homophobia, roman is a big nervous a lot lmk if I missed anything!!!

Notes: This was out way sooner than I expected. So I made this one revolving around Roman and Dmitri for once, because we don’t get that much and now he has thoughts and things to say!!! Anyways it starts a bit angsty but its really soft and fluffy and I love my baby gays. It’s dialogue heavy this time around, it’s almost as if my writing changes subconsciously depending on which character I am writing. Huh. I hope you enjoy it, I worked my butt off for it. Previous chapter here, first chapter here!

Summary: “you are 15 years old! Absolutely not!!!” Logan is having trouble letting Roman be himself, projecting his own bad experiences on him without realizing it. Roman and Dmitri kiss a lot because they’re really soft and really gay.

“you are 15 years old! Absolutely not!!!”

“dad people in my grade have been dating since they were 10 come on!”

“and they're irresponsible and don’t know better! Roman it is not a good idea-”

“Logan dear be rational; kids are supposed to-”

“NO!”

Everyone paused as Logan screamed. Roman had flinched and Logan winced knowing he caused it, but he couldn’t just stop at this point.

“Roman, dating this young is a bad idea, take it from me. I mean that was when I got together with mercy-”

“you can’t say that like it’s the biggest mistake you’ve made dad!!! Because… because if it was then I would have-I know it ended badly with you and her, but you were still happy at the time! You can’t just keep me from experiencing things because you're scared dad. I'm not you. I-I need to live my own life eventually, and if I don’t know how to then what am I gonna do when I'm an adult?”

“you don’t- Roman that isn't necessary to be happy, I mean look at me and Patton-”

“well maybe I don’t want to pine for someone for 9 years!!! Maybe, maybe I want to live my life now, instead of waiting in fear!!! Maybe I want my happily ever after before I settle down, maybe, for once, I want to live my life without worrying that I'm a disappointment to my parents!!! I know you don’t mean to but you just, you make everything so hard! You-you have so much, so much hope. That I'm going to be this perfect kid and I'm gonna grow up to be amazing, and its exhausting! I want to make a decision without worrying that I'm going to do wrong by you! And then mercy… mercy never saw me for me, and I always had to be perfect for her and she's gone now but I'm just so tired dad! I'm tired of trying to fit inside this perfect box that I think you have for me, I want to be a teenager, I want to date, I want to go to parties, I want to make mistakes and not cry myself to sleep thinking I've made you hate me. It’s so hard to try to make you happy all the time. I want to have a chance to just make me happy.”

Logan stared at Roman. He had been trying so hard to protect him and take care of him, and all he had been doing was overwhelming him. He had never meant to do any of it, Roman was right, but he went back through his brain and it hurt to see that he had unconsciously pushed his son onto a pedestal that was impossible to escape from. He was never disappointed in him, whether he did good or bad or made mistakes, he had always tried to show that he was proud no matter what. He felt tears welling in his eyes and saw Roman twist uncomfortably. He felt Patton's arm wrap around his shoulders, but he couldn’t stay there, his mind was racing too fast. He was catastrophizing he knew, but he couldn’t so easily stop himself. His head was knocked out of the process when Roman ran into his arms, wrapping him in a hug. He let his arms fold around his sons waist, letting a few tears fall.

“I'm sorry, I'm so sorry dad I just- I needed to tell you and I was going to tell you in a nicer way, a better planned way but then this happened and it all came out I'm sorry dad I didn’t mean to make you cry”

“it’s- its fine Ro. I needed to hear that from you. I'm. I'm sorry Ro I didn’t mean it. I try so hard to show that I'm always proud of you, god you have helped me so much and I've never realized that I was making you feel so pressured I'm sorry bee, I’ll try harder, I didn’t know-”

Logan’s head was buried in Roman’s chest, it was the benefit of his son growing taller than him, he could hide his tear stained face out of sight. He sniffed a bit, rubbing his eyes before letting go of him. He smiled widely at Roman.

“I was wrong to have set such impossible standards. It was wrong of me to treat you like I had a second chance at my childhood. I really, just want the best for you but-”

He took a sharp inhale and looked him in the eyes.

“but its your life. And-and if you want, if you want to date. Then, I-I support you completely. Because, because I love you Roman. So so much.”

His eyes teared up again, and he let out a choked laugh while rubbing his eyes clear. Roman smiled at him and hugged him again, thanking him profusely. At that point Virgil walked back inside. He looked at the scene, sending a questioning glance at Patton over the other two. Patton let out a small smile and shook his head, to which Virgil shrugged and went upstairs without a further thought.

 “so, he was fine with it?”

“I mean he wasn’t, but I explained a few things and he's fine with it now. It took a little bit of the harsher truths to be spilled for him to understand my point, and a few tears, but yeah.”

“wow. I haven’t seen… either of you cry in my entire time knowing you.”

“yeah it doesn’t happen often. I think the last time I saw my dad cry was when he told me that mercy wasn’t coming back.”

“geez that’s a long time. And its always baffled me that I've never seen you cry; I've known you since you were 2.”

“yeah, I'm a uh, private crier. I don’t think I've cried in front of people really since I could talk.”

“fuck man how the hell did you manage that?”

“… I mean I don’t remember it, but I think it was a leftover from when I still lived with mercy.”

“what.”

“eh, it doesn’t matter.”

“no wait what? What did she do to you?”

“pfft, I just told you Vee, I don’t remember. I get vague fuzzy feelings that are sorta like if memories were feelings, but otherwise I have no idea.”

“that’s fucked up man”

“meh. Anyways back to the original topic, soooo can I get Dmitri's number?”

“oh my god.”

“oh, and you're at 75 cents.”

“shit.”

“a dollar!”

 Virgil had handed over his number easily, smirking as Roman gave him a hug before dashing into his own room. Roman had immediately sent Dmitri a text, ‘hey, its Roman! Dads way more chill now so I stole your number from Virgil’ and he had responded almost immediately.

‘neat so are we gonna talk about what that was?’

‘I mean, I thought it was p straight forward, but I mean if you think we should?’

‘I mean yeah but’

Radio silence for a minute

‘but like, idk if you want this to be serious or smth like, casual. I mean I don’t care either way’

‘oh! Well something serious sounds nice!’

‘thank god I was not prepared for something casual regardless of what I said’

‘pfft, its fine tough guy’

‘if that nickname sticks you gotta use it around rem, it'll make him bug out’

‘alrighty! Tough guy~’

‘ouch yo chill it with that I'm in public’

‘pfft ur a dork Dee!’

‘I am absolutely not a whale’s penis and I'm offended you would even imply it’

‘oh my god I'm gonna break up with you’

‘nooooo don’t do that I'm too dark and mysterious to be broken up with for that’

‘dark and mysterious my butt! The only dark thing about you is your humor and the only mysterious things about you are your eyes!’

‘babe I have a reputation to keep up!’

‘guess your rep will just have to fit me in there somewhere then!’

‘god you are adorable, I gtg before you somehow make me start uwuing at my family’

‘uwu bye bye mistew dmitwi!!!’

‘god its disgusting kill it with fire’

‘love you too Dee! <3<3<3’

‘<3’

Roman set down his phone afterwards, feeling the butterflies attacking his insides like rabid animals. He changed the tab over to his YouTube and put on his headphones, listening to his curated BTS playlist, starting off with answer: love myself, bopping along and humming. He switched the tab and scrolled through Tumblr smiling at the posts about his favorite superheroes.

 The next week was absolutely blissful for Roman, he alternated between sitting at his table with a few of his acquaintances who he would chat with about his hyperfixations, and with Dmitri and his friends. Virgil had a different lunch hour luckily, otherwise he would have been slightly embarrassed. But hilariously the first day he sat with Dee, his friends were caught off guard as a boy in soft pastels and stonewashed jeans sat beside Dmitri and was immediately nestled underneath his arm. There were words signed across the table and Dee would chuckle and respond which sent their eyes flying to Roman in his seat as he ate his sandwich oblivious to the reason he was being stared at, just sending kind smiles back at them.

When lunch had ended, he had stood on his toes and kissed Dee’s cheek and his friends all had the shocked looks on their faces again. He ran off to class and had forgotten about the whole interaction afterwards. He was only reminded after school through a text from Dee.

‘sorry about my friends at lunch, they're judgmental shits. I told them off but knowing them they might continue to be asshats anyways’

‘huh. Didn’t even notice. I really need to get around to fully learning sign, I have the smallest feeling that if I'm hanging out with you more it might possibly be useful.’

‘meh, if I really need you to know something and I can’t talk I’ll just text you.’

‘mmm but I still want to learn! Anyways what were they saying’

‘oh they were being dicks about your clothes and then they were being shits about me dating you, they're assholes, I only hang out with them cuz coach had everyone learn sign for me and they're the only people I can talk to during the school day’

‘oh, that’s rude! Do you want me to stop hanging out with you at lunch?’

‘no not at all, I just want you to know what you're getting into’

‘mhm!’

The next time Roman sat with them, he had sent about 8 insults to the people around the table while Dee wasn’t looking, essentially ‘fuck off you judgmental homophobic dicks’ and after that the group shut their traps about him and Dee.

 The week after, Dmitri was busy almost always. There was a big game this weekend and he Remy and Virgil were always either practicing, doing schoolwork, or sleeping for the most part. He would send good morning and good night texts but that was mostly it and Roman felt dumb for missing him so much. Virgil invited him to practice after seeing him sitting around staring at his phone like a kicked dog.

He had sat on the bleachers, watching the coach drill them and them playing near their best. They had taken a rest and Dmitri had made his way up to him, a giant bottle of water in hand. He smiled and let out a croaked hello.

“oh, Dmitri when was the last time you spoke?”

He had coughed and held up a 6 on his fingers. Roman pouted and placed a kiss on his chapped lips. Dmitri waved his hand to say it isn't a problem with a smile on his face and it made Roman pout more and kiss him again, wrapping his arms around himself after. Dee ruffled his hair and went to say something when the whistle blew calling them back. He sighed and stood up, signing ‘I love you’ before rushing back to the field. Roman sat in silence, watching them play once again.

 Roman was beaming. The game was today and that meant he would get Dmitri back afterwards along with Remy and Virgil. He was filled with jitters; he knows the team had been working tirelessly for the whole week and he was excited to see his friends kick the rival schools butt! He was rushing Patton out the door again, just like he was a few weeks before but for a separate reason this time.

He wasn’t expecting the time at the game to fly as quick as it did, but here he was. It was nearing the end and they weren’t very far ahead, and the worry was clear on the teams faces. And then Dmitri had the ball! The crowd roared in surprise and excitement as he weaved around the opposition. He got caught near the goal and Roman was on the edge of his seat as Dmitri kicked the ball straight into the goal. The cheers were immediate, the buzzer signaling the end of the game followed a few seconds later. Roman was up and standing at the edge of the guardrail of the bleachers jumping up and down and screaming. He raced down and met Dmitri at the entrance of the showers, looking around before tugging him off towards the underside of the bleachers. He spoke in barely restrained squeals.

“Dee I'm so proud of you!!! Oh, my goodness you did so well!!! I can’t even-”

Dmitri cut him off with a kiss, one that Roman reciprocated immediately, wrapping his arms around his neck and tilting his head as well as he could with the height difference they had when suddenly he wasn’t standing on his own feet but being held in the air from his waist. He broke the kiss with a squeak, placing his hands-on Dmitri's shoulders as he was hoisted in the air by a happy Dee. He squeaked again as he was spun around before being set on the ground. When he was steady again, he looked up at Dmitri with an amused but confused face.

“we did it”

“you did! Had you not processed that yet?”

“not really no.”

“oh, my goodness you are a dork.”

“listen if you had scored the last goal you would be a little stunned too”

“valid however-”

“oh, just shut up and kiss me again you prep”

“gladly”

“ey before you two start making out you might want to go talk to the team? They're sort of wanting to congratulate you, but you disappeared.”

Roman froze in embarrassment at his brother catching them. Dmitri just smirked and turned to face him.

“listen if any of them could get a significant other they would understand. But considering that even you haven’t gotten the nerve to ask out Remy yet, I guess they wouldn’t so I guess I should grace them with my presence, huh babe?”

“hey, fuck off my little brother didn’t need to know I like your brother!”

“oops!”

Roman giggled a bit at the blush that spread across Virgil's face. He nudged Dmitri.

“be nice honeybee. And he's right, I stole you from your festivities! We should head back over; we can be cute later”

“nonsense, that implies that you can stop being cute”

“bluhhhh that’s my brotherrrrr come on you two, be gross later”

 “DMITRI THAT WAS LEGENDARY!!!”

Dee had a cocky look on his face as his teammates congratulated him, Remy running up and tackling in a hug at first sight. He chuckled wordlessly at his brother who was screaming praise at him and then dragging him into the showers. The team followed them in all continuing to shout praise and Roman contemplated following as well. He eventually just went in after about 10 minutes, finding Dmitri surrounded by his team and. He blanched and turned around a corner, hiding his face in his hands. On the other side, Dmitri sat with blue jeans and no shirt, still dripping water from his hair. He took a few big breaths before wandering back over, not trying to push past anyone and just standing where he knew Dmitri could see him. He flushed when Dmitri smiled and winked at him over the heads of his teammates, curling up in his arms and covering his face again. He whispered to himself in his hands

“gosh I'm really gay and he's unfairly pretty”

It wasn’t much longer before the group had filed out, done with the celebration, Virgil given him a nudge as he left. He walked in, seeing Dmitri finally pulling out his shirt, and Roman couldn’t help but turn away with a bit of shyness hitting him again.

“what's up Roman? You good babe?”

“mhm! You just um,”

His mouth felt dry as salt and he was wondering when that happened.

“you look nice…”

“pfft you're a nerd.”

Roman’s mind came up with several scenarios for what could happen as he stood up to kiss him. Of course, all that happened was hands around his waist as Dee leant down to give him an easier time. He still felt fuzzy but ignored it as Dmitri pulled away to put his shirt on, quickly pulling on his leather jacket on afterwards before placing a kiss on Roman’s temple and grabbing his hand.

“come on, I'm stealing you, my folks are treating the team to ice cream and pizza and they’ve been wanting to meet you.”

“wh-what? Wait you talk about me with your parents?”

“Remy sold me out day one, but yeah, they seem genuinely interested in meeting you, so I mean why not?”

“oh. Ok then. I should probably tell my dads first, but I’ll be back!”

He ran up to Logan, wrapping him in a hug before explaining everything to him and Patton. Logan looked unsure but Patton backed him up.

“Lolo, Virgil's going to be there too, and it’s not like he's going to be stranded! Plus, there's a new diner that opened a bit ago that I've been wanting to take you to!”

“…ok. You have your keys and your wallet and your phone, right?”

“yes dad!”

“…ok then. Go have fun. Let me or pat know when you are coming home.”

“ok! See you guys tonight! Love you!!!”

 The party was far more calm than Roman had expected, most of the team dipping early on leaving just him and Virgil as guests. Neither could complain, they had free access to an abundance of pizza and ice cream, and they could spend uninterrupted time with the objects of their affections. Virgil and Remy had absconded upstairs playing games or something while Roman was sitting next to Dmitri and his parents.

“how long have you been dating now?”

“um, 2 weeks!”

“wow! And you two are already attached by the hip huh?”

Roman nodded as his cheeks burned. He felt his boyfriends arm snake around his waist, pulling him closer.

“oh, you two are adorable! We’ll leave you be, don’t have too much fun with him kiddo!”

Roman visibly relaxed as they left, leaning against his boyfriend and letting out a sigh. Dmitri moved his arm up, running his fingers through his hair, grinning at the purr like noise Roman made in response.

“you should stay the night”

“my dad wouldn’t let me do that unless-”

Virgil stormed down the stairs with a lovesick expression.

“Roman we’re staying the night!”

“oh! Does dad-”

“yeah don’t worry its fine they're chill!”

“what happened?”

“I-”

“BOY YOU BETTER GET BACK UP HERE AND KISS ME I'M HAVING KISS WITHDRAWL”

“let’s say me and Remy are a thing now? Gotta go!”

“…about what I was saying…”

“isn't that the best timing huh?”

“oh hush!”

“wanna head to bed? It is pretty late.”

“um, sure. But I wanted to cuddle some more…”

“who said I was gonna stop cuddling you nerd?”

“I? um uh”

“you can share a bed without it being sexual I hope you know.”

“oh! Oh yeah I totally, yeah duh, of course”

“come on babe”

Roman frowned at him rolling his eyes but followed him upstairs. He had walked into his room and grabbed some clothing before filing into the bathroom. When he came back, Roman had to confronts his gay again, as he was shirtless once again and he was talking to him and he's got to focus dammit!

“-so that’s why, also I have various pajamas in there, and I also have shirts that are probably way to big for you in there as well, take your pick.”

“oh um, I was just gonna sleep in this!”

“…yeah no. those jeans are way too form fitting to get away with sleeping in, and your shirt does not look nearly comfortable enough.”

“o-okay then I guess…”

He grabbed a pair of sleep shorts and one of his shirts and headed into the bathroom. When he came back, he immediately launched himself into his boyfriends’ arms. Dmitri giggled seeing the shirt choice, placing a quick kiss on his nose.

“nah you're a sarcastic butterfly”

“shhhhh I'm a sarcastic mothhhh”

“keep tellin yourself that precious”

Roman sputters a bit before giving up and hiding his face in Dee’s chest. Dmitri goes back to playing with Roman’s hair, and Roman leans into the touch. After a bit of time passes, he stops, and nudges Roman fully into bed.

“why’d you stop?”

“because that’s not a comfortable sleep position. Lay down prep, sleep is important.”

“but I don’t want to sleep, I want kisses”

Dmitri rolls his eyes and kisses Roman. By the time he pulls away, Roman has passed out. He laughs quietly and wraps his arms around the smaller boy, letting himself drift off as well.

Taglist: @fivebyfive-finebyfive @tacohippy56900 @analogical-mess @crookedlyoptimisticdestiny @angels-and-dreams @fandomloverangel @asleepybisexual @starbucks-remy @idioticsky @ijustreallylovesanderssides @superwholocked-for-life @band-be-boss-blog @llamaly @logicality-trash @fiive-second-cookies @whats-going-on-kiddos @snowshoe-main-blog @007ardra @internetwhy @musikasworld @Sammy-is-obsessed

Let me know if you want to be tagged in my writing!!!

Thank you for reading I will see you later ladies lords and nonbinary royalty!!!

#roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #deceit sanders #ts deceit #sympathetic deceit #tw deceit #remy sanders #single dads au #single sanders dads #teen!roman #teen!virgil #teen!remy #teen!deceit #roceit #logicality #sleepxiety #familial logince #familial moxiety #familial royality #familial analogical #familial prinxiety #tw swearing #tw cursing #tw argument #tw crying #my writing #my fanfiction

[chrysanthemumpink]

Chrysanthemum Stone: The Last Immortal

i have this story. It’s a bad idea but still, no one steal it! Its kind of YAish with a dark academia setting but it can be for anyone. But forgive me if i sound like a news prompter:

Chrysanthemum’s mother has been ill for as long as Chrysanthemum can remember. But now that her mother is finally on her death bed, her mysterious father has returned home. He’s there to take her away but not before Chrysanthemum’s mother tells her that she’s an immortal, a magical race of beings that harness the power of life. They have the power of immortality but are also known as harbringers of longevity for others that are wonded and ill. Not only can they prolong thier own lives, but they can strengthen the energy and life in others. The immortals are thus spirits of healing, longevity, and most importantly, infinity. Immortals, by thier very nature contain limitless and infinite power. The only catch is that they can only sustain and strengthen life, they cannot revive what is dead or what has already gone. (Or so the legend goes.)

But given the immortal’s immense power, they were all but iradicated. (I haven’t worked out why or how but the immortals were killed.) But they’ve been dead for so long that they’re considered a myth, nothing more than a tragic fairy tale. But they aren’t a myth and Chrysanthemum Stone is very much alive. But Chrysanthemum was born ill and with not enough magic to sustain herself. So her mother gave Paige her own magic and in an ultimate sacrifice, shed her own immortal power to ignite Chrysanthemums. As Chrysanthemim grew stronger, her mother grew weaker. She was only sick because it made her daughter strong. The mother tells Paige of her birth and lineage the day she dies. But now Paige is in danger. Her mother is gone, her powers have reached thier peak, and some thing is after her.

If things wern’t crazy enough, a strange man, whom she’s never seen before, says he’s her father and a priest who gets his powers from the Egyptian Gods. He takes her to an academy/boarding school for magic users. There she will learn how to use her powers. With her is Malechai, her half brother and future priest of Egyptian Magic. There’s also Sung (???), Chrysanthemum’s best friend since middle school, a japanese american, and an oracle in training. Sung always said she could tell the future but Chrysanthemum never quite believed her until now. But thank god, there’s some thread of normal life. And despite all the drama, Chrysanthemum can’t stop thinking about the cute sports player, James. He’s a shape shifter.

Orion academy is a place for young priests, oracles, shape shifters, warlocks, witches, mermaids and other mythical beings but what about Chrysanthemum? No one can know she’s an immortal. And what better way to hide her life giving powers than by studying from the book of death? Chrysanthemum is now a student of Necromancy. Her studies include Advanced Reanimation, Bio 101, and Postmordem A&P. It’s a difficult transition for the bubbly girl with a tragic past.

Can Chrysanthemum hide among the Necromancers? Will she strangle her little brother? Will her best friend stop crushing on fuck boys? And will James ask her out? But better still, will the memory of her mother become less painful? Is Chrysanthemum truly the last immortal? And what will she and her friends do to stop the thing that is after her and her power?

——————

Anyway, I’m thinking of getting these OCs drawn and I’m comparing prices and art styles. I think im going to comission multiple artists. I also want to post the chapters on a different tumblr account to see if anyone will care.

It’s stupid but i keep reading about egyptian religion and magic.

P.S.

Chrysanthemum is black and darkskinned (Half African American, Half Egyptian...still 100% black). Asexual.

Malachi is half african american and half egyptian but his mother is a war vetrian whose relationship with Malachi’s father is illegal but necessary. (More on that later) Bisexual.

Sung is a lesbian.

James is white and the only person who has grown up in the magical world. Straight (i guess)

#ocs #oc #story #writing #the last immortal

[squidproquoclarice]

I apologize if you've covered this already, but I just started reading Sunrise and I was wondering about your interpretation of Javier and Bill. Arthur REALLY soured hard on Javier even though they were good friends in the beginning--he can even be heard saying they should have left him to die in Guarma. I don't think RDR2 even really explains how Javier split up with Dutch, let alone the pathetic state he ends up in RDR1.

Nah, friend, no worries!  If I’ve covered something before, the worst I’m gonna do is answer your Ask with a link to the previous meta (and adding any new thoughts and perspectives I may have had since first writing it).  Tumblr Search is not particularly user-friendly so I know it’s hard to find out if I or anyone else has addressed that particular topic just by searching.I also have addressed Javier a bit, but it’s kind of broken up here and there, and Bill not really at all, so let’s just start fresh.  I’m gonna give a brief overview of my read on them, and some notes on Arthur’s thoughts on them.  I’ll do part 1 first with Bill, and then post a separate part 2 with Javier since this is getting lengthy.Part 1: BillBill comes across in RDR2 as very much a follower.  I’m not surprised he joined the military, because the structure, the clear orders, the hierarchy, would have appealed to him.  He’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I think he’s panned for his lack of intelligence more than necessary and treated as the butt of too many jokes, and that does hurt him.  He does make some insightful observations like how Arthur can just claim it’s “just one of them things” but Bill’s dragged mercilessly for his perceived failures.  Even Arthur participates in that with joking about Bill’s failure with the dynamite rather than acknowledging he could easily have fucked it up too since he hooked up the detonator.  (I think that “Wasn’t my fault, things just happened” reaction from Arthur is a panicked need to shift blame due to his anxiety and his lack of self-worth, where not producing results means worthlessness as a person, but that’s a whole ‘nother meta bag of chips.)His apparent PTSD from military service, his attempts to talk about how he’s “seen things” and seemingly reach out to people for support, are instead mocked with dismissive attitudes like “Yeah, you saw things while digging latrines, huh?”He’s a bit of a sexist and racist, realistically so for the times.  His racism/sexism is more the dismissive “lesser than” assumption for women and non-whites rather than the active denigration and provocation Micah engages in.  He’s strongly implied as a bi or gay man dismissed from the military for homosexual relationships, which has to take an additional toll in loneliness and isolation, particularly back then, and particularly given how emotionally unsupported he is in the gang.  He seemingly wants to initiate something with Kieran, but doesn’t know how, except clumsy attempts at camaraderie to make up for his earlier threats at Dutch’s behest.He’s fiercely loyal to Dutch as his leader and savior, and also likely feels undervalued.  So the chance for him to come into his own, as he sees it, in Chapter 6 by sticking by Dutch and proving his worth finally, is something he’s not going to pass up.  His moment has finally arrived to shine.  The golden boys, Arthur and John, are failing Dutch and walking away.  He’s deeply disappointed in Arthur, more so than John, because while he sees John as a coddled pet, Arthur’s been a man worth looking up to all this time.  So he’ll stick with Dutch and finally prove his worth.  Arthur treats him mostly like the big dumb muscle he himself pretends to be, and had Arthur been more secure in himself, or more in touch with his own emotions, that could have been common ground and sympathy for Bill.  As is, I think he cares about Bill as a brother in arms, yes, but they’re seemingly not that close.  They don’t have a natural affinity and while it’s not Arthur’s contempt like he has for Micah, his role as “implacable oldest brother keeping the boys in line” means he can’t really reach out to Bill either.  So he does like he does with Sean: briskly trying to keep a little brother in his place and teach him necessary things.  It’s interestingly like Arthur and Dutch’s dynamic: the senior man sparingly doling out his approval to his junior, and keeping him hungry for it.  Guess Arthur picked that up from Dutch.  :P  Though it doesn’t quite work.  Bill pushes back on it far more than Arthur does, because he genuinely believes he’s better than the scraps of validation and praise he gets from the gang.  Post-RDR2, he’s taken Arthur’s place as the hyperloyal man spouting how all they need to do is believe in Dutch and they’ll be all right.  I do think he absorbed Micah’s bad influence too of overwhelming and unnecessary violence, and even things like participating in Dutch’s theatricality with the gelding shears, combined to make something truly ugly.  He seems to start to play all of that straight.  As a gang leader in 1911 in RDR1, he’s more or less become like Colm O’Driscoll, who they used to scorn as nearly an animal, with his gang engaging in overwhelming violence, torture, implied rape, etc.  He’s clearly given way to the worst in him.Timelinewise, I do think he stuck with Dutch a good while.  In Sunrise, I have Bill accompanying Dutch as he flees the country in late 1900.  I’m guessing it’s 1907 when they finally part ways–Dutch going to see Micah, and Bill presumably starting his own gang in New Austin with the power of the Del Lobos broken.  But it seems from RDR1 they still keep in touch, which makes sense with Dutch relatively nearby to New Austin and establishing his own gang base in Cochinay, now that Tall Trees and Great Plains are cleared of Skinners.Part 2 for Javier in a little bit.

#bill williamson #arthur morgan #rdr2 #rdr1 #thank you for coming to my red talk

[dramallamadingdang]

Feeling still a bit better today *fingers crossed* Still not near ALL better, but...better. :) So have some replies. :) These are for @jennamaxon, @taylors-simblr, @dunne-ias, @hugelunatic, @twofingerswhiskey, @maksplaygroundsims2, @deedee-sims, @unicornfatty, @rioa, @esotheria-sims, @penig, @thewynd, annnnnnnnd @sparkstark...

jennamaxon replied to your post “A question, before it’s back to bed with me...”

If I were doing it, I'd provide the needed CC as a bundle alongside the neighbourhood files.

The only thing about bundling it is...what if someone doesn’t want all of it? Or what if they already have a lot of it? I mean, from what I understand, once CC is bundled, it’s not an easy process to un-bundle, and the Uni, especially, has a LOT of CC in the form of hood deco.

taylors-simblr replied to your photoset “Just dropping in to sing You Light Up My Life @honeywell-mts. <3...”

Is this your university hood? It’s fantastic!! <3

That it is! And thank you. :) It kind of got out of hand. I didn’t intend for it to be that big, but then I tend to go overboard, so.... I think I’d share it as a main hood, though. Unless people would prefer it as a uni template? Or maybe I’ll do both? Either way it’ll need to be finished with lots. I guess I’ll put out a general ask when the time comes that it’s ready for sharing.

dunne-ias replied to your post “A question, before it’s back to bed with me...”

ooh that'd be a fun thing to play around in! I love decorated hoods, because I'm lazy

Me, too! :D But I’m also picky and something of a perfectionist, which is a sort of bad and self-conflicting combination. *laugh*

hugelunatic replied to your post “A question, before it’s back to bed with me...”

It's just like a full hood. The hood folder and either include necessary cc or link to it.

Yeah, before I came over here to Tumblr, it dawned on me that there are predecorated-but-lotless terrains up for download at MTS. So, I downloaded one of those and, yep, the whole neighborhood folder. I’ll be including the CC, though, mostly because I have no clue where I got most of the stuff I have or who made it, so finding links would be problematic and time-consuming. :)

twofingerswhiskey replied to your photoset “Just dropping in to sing You Light Up My Life @honeywell-mts. <3...”

It all looks so lovely! ��

maksplaygroundsims2 replied to your photoset “Just dropping in to sing You Light Up My Life @honeywell-mts. <3...”

Oh my god, your hood tho. It's beautiful!! :O

Thank you to both of you. <3 I’m having waaaaay too much fun decorating it.

dunne-ias replied to your link “Online English Vocabulary Size Test”

I hope you feel better soon! I got top 5.5% on that quiz, in English. Did a similar one in my actual native language and got top 0.1%, so I'm pretty happy with 5.5% in a foreign language :9

Considering English isn’t your mother tongue, I’d say being in the top 5.5% is pretty damn good! I’d wager you did better than most Americans would. Which is embarrassing, but there it is... If only we had a government that properly funded education instead of trying to fund private “Christian” schools via ridiculous “vouchers” in the name of “freedom of choice.” :P Buuuuuut that’s a rant for another time and place. *sigh*

deedee-sims replied to your link “Online English Vocabulary Size Test”

Get better! (btw you can use tumblr from a mobile browser, I haven't used the app since 2 years or so)

Not on a Kindle, apparently. :( Or at least not on mine. I tried that and it just redirected to the mostly-broken app. It’s got an Amazon-proprietary operating system, so it has its weirdnesses that way. Although maybe if I deleted the mostly-useless app it’d work....Hmmm. 

unicornfatty replied to your photoset “Household #3: Anette McConnell and Saeyoung “Seven” Choi Their house....”

If they have a daughter, consider calling her Summer in my honour, please XD

I’d already planned that, dear. :) Not sure if they’ll ever get married, though, because I’m going to wait for mutual wants in this neighborhood, and if they do I’m not sure which surname they’ll keep. (And hyphenating is just weird, IMO. I mean, what happens when two people with hyphenated last names get married? Do you keep all four names and then the next generation there’s eight names, then sixteen, then....?) *ahem* Anyway, she might not be a “Choi.” :) If she ever exists. :)

rioa replied to your photoset “Household #2: Josie Ahn, Carmine Fortuna, and Sydney Carmichael Their...”

The RNG strikes again O_O It'll be interesting to see how they get along though since I've never had them in the same hood X)

So far? Well, I have played their household for a season now, and I don’t think it’s too much of a spoiler to say they mostly ignore each other. *laugh* Carmine and Sydney get along like a house on fire, though. Just platonically, because they’re both gay, but...Yeah, they’re buddies. Josie’s just kind of off in her own world, so far.

esotheria-sims replied to your photoset “Household #1: Georgia Eton and Dr. Oliver Little. Their house....”

A doctor who became a witch... so in other words, a Witch Doctor? :D *ba dum tss*

Well, *I* wasn’t going to say it, but....YEAH, EXACTLY! :D (Voodoo, I tell you, vooooooooodoooooooooo. :) )

penig replied to your photo “This is the “big reveal” of the queer hood’s real name. :) Its name is...”

I saw the logo and thought: Fire Island, how old school!

Yeah, that was actually kind of why I liked the name in Esperanto. Because speakers of English and the Romance languages are going to see “fire” in the name, and it’s kind of appropriate since I plopped a volcano on it. OR there’s the connotation of “flaming” gay men. All this even though the word has nothing to do with fire in Esperanto, except maybe in a figurative sense. Pride in being who you are could be seen as a sort of internal fire that can either make you warm and confident and glowing from the inside or burn you up if there’s too much of it, I suppose. So it works all around, I guess.

thewynd replied to your photoset “Household #1: Georgia Eton and Dr. Oliver Little. Their house....”

That is a first! Get abducted and become a witch...very clever!

Yeah, that’s the “alien experiments” mod. They can be turned into supernaturals or another kind of outcome instead of always knocked up. As much as I adore alien babies, I also like the variety the mod brings.

sparkstark replied to your photo “This is the “big reveal” of the queer hood’s real name. :) Its name is...”

That's so cool! What a good name, I've always named all my hoods in Latin and they sound.. old. Might switch them to Esperanto!

It’s a pretty cool language. It sounds familiar, yet it’s different and, yes, it doesn’t sound “old.” It was created to be an international standard language, so it pulls from most of the world’s major languages, making it easier for more people to learn. Duolingo offers a course, and I’ve put it on my list to learn, after I finish the Russian course. And then the Welsh course.

#jennamaxon #taylors-simblr #dunne-ias #hugelunatic #twofingerswhiskey #maksplaygroundsims2 #deedee-sims #unicornfatty #rioa #esotheria-sims #penig #thewynd #sparkstark

[violetosprey]

300+ Follower Thank You (and status)

I guess that’s enough numbers to warrant that I actually have at least 300 followers.  You would think past Dec. 17th, 2018 all numbers would be legitimate people because the new policy would have eliminated all p*rn bots.  

Ahahahahahahahaha no the bots are still here -_-

I also thought Tumblr would kind of die after that date, but it still has some value I suppose.  For me there just wasn’t a point going anywhere.

Anyways, thanks for either sticking around, or any newcomers that decided they like it here.  However, I think I should be clear what EXACTLY I’m going to be doing with this blog from now.  Status below.

Basically, as my main blog, this tumblr is going to be for personal use as well as geared towards my taste in male yanderes.  I still would also call this a dark blog since I do like to dip into that more villain/horror end of yanderes.  Not to mention, what already exists on this blog may refer to mature content at times.

Relax, I will never delete any of my posts.  What I’ve thrown up already is here to stay (unless Tumblr decided to flag it- in which case there’s not really a post they’ve flagged yet that I can refute).

What you’re mostly going to see from now on here:

1) Male yandere (or just yandere) imagery - Whatever I can find mostly just for personal pleasure to look at.  You’ll notice I’ve started tagging some posts as “yandere aesthetic.”  I’m trying to do this more often in the event that I either already know the image is just a “clickbait” (not an actual yandere), or to play it safe in case I don’t know the source material and if the character is a yandere or not.

2) Yandere recommendations/commentary - These will be mostly reblogs.  There’s a review blog I follow of course.  If I see anything either that looks worth it to check later, or someone makes a good point I like (from anyone) I’ll likely reblog it.

3) Random reblogs - Just...of anything.  Whatever I like.  That’s the “personal” part of this blog.

What you likely WON’T see anymore:

1) New BTD/TDDUP original posts - I still like the games a lot guys, but I’m quite happy with what I’ve already put out.  I haven’t had another post idea in months, and it’s better not to try to push those ideas out.

2) BTD/TDDUP image reblogs - I can be picky with what art I like to repost for one.  The other part of this is just I feel like I don’t want to “false advertise” that I can continuously focus on BTD/TDDUP here when I know I’m not doing original posts for the games now.  Besides, there’s plenty of other blogs around that do that already.

3) Yandere thought posts - A lot of reasons for this: I’ve run a little low on steam, can’t think of anything lately that’s not too controversial and honestly I think there’s other people out there that discuss yanderes better than I do.  That’s a good thing, don’t worry :P

Hopefully this helps people know what to expect now and whether other blogs will fit their needs better.  My usual line:  Thank you for the likes, reblogs and follows.  All appreciated, but nothing is necessary here.  Feel free to come and go as you please.

Oh, I guess one more thing.  To make things easier, if I find another interest that I DO feel like making content for (usually writing), I’ll just make a sideblog for it.  I don’t think anyone needs me to plug my sideblogs on my main though.  If you ever a find a sideblog of mine, I’ll make it obvious with the title and description that it’s my sideblog.  I only anticipate them getting found by people with similar interests though.  I think that’s a good thing so that we don’t have the awkward cross interests this blog started out with.  

I’ve just got one sideblog right now that I’m messing around with at the moment.  No idea if I’ll make a lot or not in the future.

#thank you #own post

[lord-arlen]

Thoughts inspired by looking at the archives of this blog, which basically turned into a lengthy account of the last 3 years of my life.

Why did I originally stop using this blog? I originally stopped using this blog not long after starting my studies in Edinburgh when I was in a really bad condition mentally. I had intended Edinburgh to be a new start where I would try to be a different person and it just completely failed; I didn’t have the willpower. So the first few months I was beating myself up over having failed to do any activities or talk to anybody. I got really depressed and I felt like I had to stop posting here, because I was worried that contemplating the situation too much was exacerbating it, and I was worried that I would spread too much of a negative mood to my readers.

But not long after I made this blog private a magical thing happened. I was on a pretty small Master’s course, and everybody on it was talking to each other via a group chat and going out together and stuff like that---except me, because I hadn’t spoken to anybody and didn’t know any of this was going on. But since the course was that small, it was impossible for them not to notice this. So they took pity on me, I guess---I think it was actually mostly the initiative of one person, a Greek called Olga. She started kind of aggressively socializing with me in class, asking me questions and so on, and soon enough I was in their group chat and being invited to outings to pubs and films and so on. There also ended up being a fair amount of group project work on the course, so I got to know a lot of them that way. Although I was a very quiet member of the group normally, I could actually make significant contributions to discussions when I was working together with them on a group project. All sorts of things happened! We all watched Arrival together! I went to somebody’s house to talk to them about research! I celebrated Chinese New Year with people! I went to a sushi party! At one point I was even going semi-regularly to the common room to have lunch with these people and just chat with them relaxedly---this is the kind of Holy Grail of social life that I’ve never previously or since attained. One of my regrets is that I never went with them with them to an academic conference in (IIRC) the Netherlands---I’m not very confident about travelling because I’ve basically never travelled anywhere far from home before, but that would have been an ideal opportunity to get that experience.

So I was pretty happy from like November 2016 to May 2017. And I think some of the highest-quality output on my WordPress blog and main Tumblr account comes from that time.

It wasn’t to last, however. In the end, I still didn’t manage to make any proper connections with people. I never initiated conversations with anybody, because I didn’t know what to talk to them about. I never really got any idea of what they were like as a person, what they would like or wouldn’t like to talk about, because I’m bad at paying attention to such things. My presence in that social group was only really maintained by the common social context of the Master’s course bringing us together. So by the time teaching ended and I started working on my dissertation, all the social events dried up as everybody had to get to work. I was still in their group chat, and some people asked me for help proofreading their essays or with writing code for their projects, so I did have some contact still, but it was all slowing down and I realized it wasn’t going to last.

The dissertation was an interesting experience. It was probably the most significant thing I’ve ever achieved. I had been worried about whether I would be able to come up with something to do it on, given that I’m not particularly creative and more comfortable with learning what’s already known than doing original research. But one of my lecturers had been talking about an approach to doing linguistics research that I had never come across before: having people learn artificial “mini-languages” in an experimental setting and seeing what sort of errors they made, in the hope that this would tell us about the language transmission process in general. It was pretty easy to generate a novel experiment in this vein formulaically: just pick a Greenbergian universal of the form “A implies B”, design the artificial language training data to exhibit A but be ambiguous about whether it has B, see if the experiment subjects generalize to B or ¬B when their knowledge of the mini-language is tested subsequent to training. So I picked Universal 38 and my dissertation was the resulting experiment.

Designing and carrying out the experiment was quite fun. There was a bit of an issue where I took a while designing the experiment and my supervisor got worried. But eventually I was done, and when I was done it had been designed carefully. I put out an ad offering to pay £5 to all of my subjects (all funded by a grant from the department) and I got my desired 40 subjects quite quickly. Setting up the experiment, contacting all 40 of these people, scheduling a place to meet them, instructing them on what to do, all of these were things I never thought I’d have the executive function to pull off, and yet I did them all with actual ease. The effort of doing all this basically distracted me from the emerging collapse of my social life.

Then I got to the stage of actually writing the dissertation. And that was pretty tough. One issue was that my parents wanted me to go on holiday with them to Greece, because by this time it was July. I had a kind of emotional conversation with them where I had to refuse, because I knew I was pressed for time and taking a week off from writing would probably result in failure. They didn’t really accept this and kept saying things like, “but if you work hard enough, you can finish the dissertation in time and still go on holiday with us”, and I had to convince them I wasn’t capable of working that hard. After repeatedly keeping my stance firm they finally relented. (This is a fairly significant milestone in my mind because my parents still kind of have the mindset where I’m their child and they determine what activities I’m doing, and I’m generally bad at saying “no” to them.)

But writing the dissertation was a fairly lonely and stressful endeavour, and by the time I finished, I had kind of lost all faith in my experiment. I doubted whether an artificial “mini-language” could really tell us anything about a real natural language. I also realized I had no real understanding of statistical inference, and so I couldn’t really talk about what my results meant. I did a very basic statistical analysis on the data, which may not have been the appropriate one for the data, and got a nearly-but-not-quite significant p-value. My results and conclusion sections ended up being very short.

It was this disillusionment that led to me deciding to not bother to apply for a PhD and just try to get a job. I knew it would be difficult, because I had no idea what sort of job to do, or how to effectively decide what sort of job to do. But I figured it was what I had to do. And in the end I’d probably get it done, I thought. Even though I was disillusioned with what I had done, 2017 gave me a lot more confidence in my ability to do things.

In September my accommodation contract ended and I was living with my parents again. I had one idea for what job to do that had come to me at that point (via a suggestion from my mother, not from my own searching): to get a job as a copy editor at a fairly well-known UK secondary educational textbook company. That seemed like a reasonably interesting thing to do and the company seemed like a nice place to work it. They had a pretty gruelling application process. I did get invited to an on-site interview + round of tests at an “Assessment Centre” in December. Although this happened in September, I basically avoided job searching until this interview happened months later, because I was kind of riding all my hopes on this one job and because searching for jobs was hard.

Their Assessment Centre experience was actually quite fun. Apart from the job interview, my first ever, where I was extremely awkward, as one would expect from my personality. But the tests were fun, and they seemed easy enough. There were also several people doing the tests with me who I talked to a bit throughout the day. There was an extremely posh guy called Rupert who was writing a sci-fi novel and making a conlang for it---he’s the only other person I’ve ever met IRL who does conlanging. There was a girl who I talked to about birds (I had gotten into birdwatching [solitarily] in mid-2017 at Edinburgh once social events with my course mates became less frequent.) But I didn’t get any of these people’s emails or phone numbers or Facebook accounts or anything, so nothing lasting came of that.

In the end, that job went to one of the other people. So then I had to continue my job search. My graduation from Edinburgh happened around this time, at the end of December. I ended up feeling pretty sad throughout the ceremony because I felt like the good part of my life was ending. My parents tried to get pictures of me smiling, which was really annoying at the time. In the end they didn’t get any. Obviously I think it’s a pity now that there are no photos of me smiling at my graduation from Edinburgh, but it was necessary with my feelings at the time.

Although I’ve just realized that there is a photo of me smiling at my graduation... just not one my parents took. Obviously I saw my coursemates again at graduation. But I really didn’t know how to deal with this, given that it would probably be the last time I ever saw them again. I don’t know how to handle saying goodbye to people. So naturally I handled it in the worst possible way by trying to avoid them. I chatted a bit to the people I was sitting next to during the ceremony, but then afterwards when we all went outside, and everybody gathered together to do some more chatting, I just slunk off back to my parents. But before I could get to them, I heard somebody calling my name, and it turned out that one of them---a Bulgarian girl called Zlati---wanted to take a picture of me, to remember me by. I was quite touched by this and so at that point, I did smile. OK, it wasn’t really a genuine smile, I was too depressed for that, but I did make my best effort to smile. Here is the picture (she sent it to me on Facebook afterwards):

She works in Oxford now, or at least that’s where she went immediately after Edinburgh. She told me that if I’m ever in Oxford I should let her know. I haven’t spoken to her ever since. I would like to, but I don’t know how to. (The same goes for all of my Edinburgh coursemates, of course.) If I did go to Oxford I probably would be able to contact her because she explicitly permitted that, but until that happens I probably won’t do it. Maybe I could go to Oxford once I have my own place and am more confident about travelling. Hopefully she would still be happy to meet me now that over a year has passed.

In any case---although I would definitely like to meet my Edinburgh friends again, ultimately I am not going to have my social needs met until I have friends where I live, who I can meet on a regular basis.

Anyway, that was 2017. And then in 2018, I just... kind of faffed around for the first half of the year. I couldn’t make any decisions. It was just very exhausting to think about what I should do. I could do programing, but it wasn’t something that really appealed to me very much. I did contemplate becoming a teacher, because trying to convey information to people is something I do enjoy very much... but teaching involves a lot more than that, and it is probably something that would be pretty tough on somebody with as poor social skills as me. So while I did contact some recruiters about teaching jobs I ended up chickening out on following up on any of the opportunities they brought up. By February I was thinking I should definitely consider doing a PhD as well. But the application process for a PhD is a lot more demanding, and it’s more difficult to find information on how it should be done. If I had still been in Edinburgh I could have asked my coursemates for help, maybe, but at home it seemed impossible. The biggest obstacles are the need to pick a supervisor, and the need to have a research proposal (if I’m looking to do a PhD in linguistics in the UK, at least). I still would like to do a PhD more than anything else but I can’t make any progress towards it until I have some idea what I would do my PhD about.

In March my parents made me sign up for a free course offered by the local council for jobseekers. That actually had the effect of me not doing any jobseeking while the course was running, because as long as I was attending the course I felt like I was Doing Something. The classes for the course were not particularly bothersome because they were only from 10am to 3pm, and they didn’t require much work---all we were doing was getting told basic information about how to write CVs, how to use Microsoft Excel, etc. I did talk to the other course attendees, one of whom happened to actually be someone I knew from high school. So that was a reasonably fun experience. But it was just procrastination really.

After that course I had to just suck it up and get a programming job. I couldn’t think of anything else; although I wasn’t really into programming, I had been in the past and had acquired basic fluency with coding that way. Since programmers are in high demand, and employers are also used to them being socially awkward types who don’t do well in behavioural interviews, I figured I’d be able to get a job without too much trouble.

And that’s what happened. I applied for a few jobs, got a few interviews, and said yes to the first company that gave me an offer. And that’s how we got to the current situation. What I didn’t really realize at the time was how unpleasant the experience of having a job I’m not enthusiastic about would be. I obviously wasn’t looking forward too it, but I figured it would just be a bit dull and I’d be able to deal with it and maybe think in a relaxed way about how to achieve greater ambitions over several years. Instead it turns out that it’s actively, significantly unpleasant and leaves me in a state of sort of perpetual panic.

So I am pretty depressed again, just like I was when I stopped this blog. But not depressed in a hopeless way. I mean, things could get better, and I am trying to make them better. Right now, the most important change I think I can make is moving out of my parent’s house. One thing that’s apparent from this review of the last 3 years is that although I managed to Do Things at Edinburgh to some extent, I pretty much lost that ability once I moved back in with my parents. I guess this is the place where I spent two decades growing up as a more or less completely passive person, so naturally it’s hard to maintain agency here. Maybe moving will help, maybe it won’t. If it doesn’t help, I have more options, like trying to get a new job or doing serious dedicated work towards coming up with a PhD research proposal or trying to find fulfilment from hobbies or something. I will never be out of options; there are always new things to try; there is always hope. The good part of my life may be over but we won’t know for certain until the day that I die, which is hopefully a long way away.

#about me #my life

[jibrillenyan]

Eldarya Valentine Event Review

So, as everyone who reads the guide blog knows, I try my best to stay 400% neutral there; I don't want to impose my opinions on people who just want to know what the right answers are and, to be honest, I tend to keep to myself anyway. But I've often been asked to share my opinions at least on this Tumblr (there was actually a poll a few years ago, where I asked if people wanted that and I just realized I never started posting opinions anyway. XD sorry, I'm so terribad at this) so here I am, being asked my thoughts on the matter and answering, for once. I also noticed I suck at tagging; blame the fact that this is just an info-blog about the guide website, I promise I'll go back and sort them out. I will tag Personal opinion posts or the ones about myself with "Purrsonal" so you can skip them if you want. (All) that being said, the Valentine event... under the cut because it’s extra long.

As usual, it started with bugs. Yeah, ok, let's move on, there is nothing new to say. I really wish they tested this stuff a bit before tossing it on us. 

"Victim of its own success" my @$$.

Outfits: Truth be told, I overall don't like them. There are some pieces that I find absolutely great but that is it. Valkyon's especially is really weird to look at, more like a chastity device than date outfit, even if I do like the boots, and the shoulderpads aren't that bad I guess. Hopefully people have better taste than me and can appreciate them more, but for me, having to pay potentially so much more than usual for outfits that I like far less was a bit of a disappointment.

Money: In that regard, yes you do pay more, a lot more, it's not just you, it's a fact. On average (there was some market involved, plus the occasional energy potion... blablabla) the 2017 event, assuming optimal completion (not spending more than strictly necessary) cost a whole 80 maana (or less!) for 3 outfits. The 2018 event? 0. Yep, all free. 2019? We are talking about 1200 maana (optimal completion) and we all know many of us didn't optimally complete. It sucked.

True, this is the only event you can finish early without spending a single gold coin (2017 and 2018 required gold coins if you made mistakes or skipped some days that didn't depend on knowing the answers), but it's also the only event where if you want the companion you have to pay. 2017? present from Leiftan, free. 2018, Completion Prize, free.

Companion: As someone who watched My Little Pony as a toddler, it's simply adorable. Diabetes-inducing adorable, but still adorable. Plus, it's animated (but it kinda looks like it's having a seizure...)! Is it the start of a trend? Stats are really not great (unless puberty hits reaaally hard and the adult is a half-miracle), but I caved in and bought it at least on the Italian version. It sucks that it's not free. :( The fact that the companion could only be obtained by paying for it was the biggest downside of this event for me, and I think that it was also the first time this happened outside an episode since the game came out internationally. /Sadpanda.

Background: I love backgrounds, and this is very sugary, but beautiful; I just wish it didn't replace the companion as completion reward, because if I HAD to choose between the 2, I would have preferred the latter, as much as I wish we had more event backgrounds, companions are just more useful, especially for newbies.

Mechanics: My biggest complain here is the cost, too high. We had all foreseen the use of the newly acquired alchemy minigame as the engine for this event, and while some don't like it, I was ok with that. It's just too expensive to be likable. We never had to pay so much for a Valentine event and I hope it won't repeat itself. On the bright side, it's not a skill minigame, so it's not something we can fail. Considering the issues many had during the last events, perahps at least THAT is a good thing. It's nice that you can find the ingredients everywhere, including the low energy areas, but I would have preferred if they had split the loot pool among them instead of everything dropping everywhere; finding everything you need for a specific outfit, especially the scrolls, is extremely hard with these chances, and the scrolls are 100 maana. Which brings me to the next point: the final questions. While I like the idea of a tiny-mini-episode inside the event with its answers to guess, God Bless the guides, because I'd like to see people complete this event using no extra maana or gold, without relying on people who paid to advance faster. If you try to do it staying in those 1200 maana, the optimal completion, you submit yourselves to the the RNGesus, and it could take DAYS to complete a route. Now, imagine getting a couple of answers wrong, and having to wait a DAY to retry... get them all wrong and you take 13 days JUST for the answers... it's a bit crazy. Cant we have, I don't know, an attempt every 4-6 hours? It's like they are really trying hard to make us spend money this time around.

Story: Well, can't say that I liked seeing Gardienne "Unable to control herself" and cheating on her boyfriend, mostly because I don't think it was necessary. If you haven't played episode 19 yet, the boyfriend is not mentioned, as you are in that weird out-of-time situation where there is no boyfriend yet, and it doesn't feel as terrible. Yes, "you" are still kissing someone you may not like for the sake of the outfit/illustration with no option to opt out, but at the same time, it's quite mild and it is just a dream... I wish it had been like that for accounts past episode 19 as well. This version leaves a sour taste in my mouth and knocks my Erika LOM meter down a few notches. Yes, I understand it's a dream, and I'm fully aware people dream really weird stuff sometimes, where you do things you'd never do in real life and have no control over yourself, but she doesn't even show any embarassment or regret upon waking up. I also do not identify with the MC in this kind of game so I'm mighty fine with disliking her or her actions (not the first time~~~); I would probably not have minded a situation like this for the story's sake. It would have been interesting to explore (although, I'm always a bit scared about trusting Beemoov with this stuff, they can't handle it very well). But it is supposed to be a cute valentine event, and it would have taken so little to make this more palatable for everyone. Was it really necessary to add this tiny bit of angst?

Overall opinion: I know I criticized a lot, this event was probably among the ones I've liked the least, mostly for the excessive cost and some debatable choices on the story. I did like some things though, including using the alchemy minigame (I know I'm in the minority here :p), mostly because it requires no skill, something that has caused issues in the past - minigames hard to play on touch screens, color impairments, etc., etc. - and I liked the fact that they removed Daily gates - the fact you couldn't advance past the missions of the day unless you paid. This event could be completed in a day if you wanted, and with a bit of luck without spending a single gold coin, that was nice. I'm not sure I would like another event like this, but there was some potential that I hope won't be immediately discarded.

Loved the best (ranked 1st to 4th + Bonus to be fair since I listed 5 things I dislike XD): 1. I LOVE THE TIMER ON THE CORNER, underappreciated little bastard *heart* 2. No daily gates, you could finish the entire event in one day or in 12, without spending extra money. 2. The mini-episode at the end. The idea of it at least, I've already said I don't like some of the... content. 3. No luck with explorations? You can finish the event with maana. It's nice that you can use maana (and not gold coins) to finish the event if you are unlucky or don't have enough time. 4. No hard-to-do minigames (I've never had an issue with them, but I've heard of hundreds of people who did.) 5. The background and the companion were overly cute.

Hated the beast (ranked 1st to 4th + Special guest star): 1. Companion in Gold coins only, my biggest disappointment 2. The whole cheating thing. Why? Was it needed? 3. Having to pay maana for an event, when the ones before were all free 4. Disregarding personal taste, I don't think Valkyon outfit was suited for a Valentine day date. 5. And once again, the bugs. I just... don't... have... any polite words left for it. It's last only because it's featured in every single event, so it has lost the novelty effect.

#purrsonal

[mazerunnersecretsanta]

IT’S THAT TIME OF THE YEAR AGAIN: TMR SECRET SANTA 2019!! We know it feels like summer’s still going strong, but nevertheless, it’s time to get our secret santa going again!

Welcome, tmr fans old and new, to our TMR Secret Santa 2019!

Last year’s tmrss was so much fun and we’re so excited to run it again! Can’t wait to see all kinds wonderful tmr content emerge from it - fanfic, fanart, gifsets, manips/edits, fanvids… Just the kind of gift exchange we like to see!

You may be familiar with Secret Santas and how they work but, just in case, here is what will be happening:

Sign up for the Secret Santa by filling out our sign-up form. The information you give us in your sign-up form will be the deciding factor in both what kind of gift you’re going to create and what kind of gift you’re going to receive, so please make sure you read and fill it in carefully! You can specify favourite characters and ships etc. - or any that you don’t want to be featured in your gift, or don’t want to create for yourself.

You will then be matched with a giftee, for whom you will create your gift, according to their own Secret Santa wishes :))

Once you have finished making your gift, you will submit it to us via email or, if necessary, via a file sharing platform.

We will post all the gifts on this blog during the week running between Christmas Day (25th Dec) to New Year’s Eve (31st Dec) for your recipient (and for the fandom) to enjoy. Have fun perusing all the beautiful new content and, if you like, making your guesses, but please maintain secrecy, that’s part of the fun!

The big Secret Santa reveal will take place on 5th Jan, when we will post a list of all the Santas involved and tell you who created which gift.

After that, you’re free to post the gift you created anywhere else (your own tumblr, your lj etc.).

——————————————————————————

Now, we all love a good deadline, so here is the timeline for the Secret Santa:

2nd September - Signups are now open!

25th September - Signups close

14th October - Secret Santa assignments sent out

15th December - Gifts due in

25th December - Gifts start being posted on our blog

5th January - the Big Secret Santa Reveal!

       ————————————————��—————————

This is going to be so fun! We’d love to have lots of tmr fans getting together to brighten our fandom and each other’s festive periods with these gifts, so please sign up, share, reblog, tell your friends – however you want to do it, tell your friends and spread the word :D Let’s show tmr some love!

If you want to be a part of the exchange, but are unsure whether you’ll be able to commit, then there are options to become either a Pinch Hitter (someone who makes a gift, possibly at short notice, if a santa drops out or is otherwise unable to complete their gift) or a Beta Reader - details about this can be found here.

You can find more info, and the rules and guidelines, in the top bar on our main page, and make sure to follow this blog so you can keep up to date with all the latest news and announcements.

Please don’t hesitate to get in touch if you have any questions! :)

Have fun!!!!

Dreams and Bridge 🎅🎁 P.s. A huge thank you to @viclouis for designing and making our lovely festive blog header and icon again this year!!

#tmrss #tmredit #the maze runner #tmrss19 #maze runner secret santa

[alo-piss-trancy]

Hello, you have been identified as An Awesome Writer™! Congrats, you rock! So that all of your readers can shower you with some extra love today, please tell us your favorite five (or as many as you want) stories of yours and why you like them and then send this to another five fic authors you think deserve this title! ❤

Gee, I wonder who this could be from? c; (Thank you so much I love you!)

Okay so I’m doing seven because as you all know from my zillion ships and characters I’ve written for/screamed about, I’m incapable of picking a specific favourite lmao. But it’s still less than half my fics so it’s fine. Also none of these are ranked, I enjoyed them all equally tbh. (Forgive my lack of heart emojis RIP, I’m on desktop for this one)The Troubles Rain Can Bring (Pers/ona 5) : Of course I have to bring this one up, since it’s the one I consider my first legit omo fic (Jade was my first foray, but since it’s unfinished and I picked a dead fandom specifically so I had less chances of getting mean comments, I consider it more of a practice run). This was my first time writing for a very active and current fandom, so it was really intimidating, but I was also really excited to participate in creating for a game I was so passionate about! Also that fic was just a total labour of self-indulgence and love (excuse for fluff with my otp? combining all my fav tropes? Gratuitous Akira Suffering? Including the others for fun towards the end? I was in hog heaven!) While I definitely can find parts where I could improve the writing now, I still love it for all of the effort I put into it, and I got such a lovely response that made me feel really welcome on ao3, the omo tag on tumblr, and in the p/5 fandom! It’s kind of nostalgic for me, even if it was only written like a year and a half ago, haha.All Bottled Up (Dang/anRonpa: THH) : I’m just really proud of this fic, and I had so much fun writing it! I think it’s probably one of the few fics I’ve written that was a completely smooth ride of inspiration and fun from start to finish, without any hitches in the writing process or me getting bogged down with other projects. Seriously I think I hammered the entire thing out in like a week or two lmao. I love Naegiri so much, and the idea was a treat to work with even if it’s some of the most cliché omo scenarios, it was just a nice relaxing bit of indulgence! Also I got to dig into Kirigiri’s character, which I didn’t get to do in my other fic of her (since that one was so short and oddly styled). My favourite bit was probably getting to mess with the drawbacks of her gloves/hand injuries, and of course those fluffy bits with Naegi! Getting Your Feet Wet (Pers/ona 5) : This one, hoo boy. Definitely one of my longest fics, and while at the time when I posted it I kind of hated half the stuff in it (just because I had been nitpicking it for so long lmao), now that time has gone by I can genuinely say I love it and it’s probably one I’m proudest of. Not only was it my first full dive into snut (and I’d like to think it isn’t too shabby), but I got to work with a rarepair that I’ve been intrigued by, with two of my fav npcs from the game! So fun times all around! It was great to imagine how Sae might have changed and opened up since the game’s ending, and what Tae could do to help draw her out of that strict shell while still making her feel secure and comfortable. Also I got to include pet/p.lay which is something I’d been dying to write since I started that account, so bonus points for that! And I got a way better response than I was expecting, so that was nice!A Sinking Ship (Pers/ona 5) : ((Okay I swear I still plan to update the other half of this one someday soon, I literally have the draft halfway done I just haven’t been able to get it finished to the level I want.)) Anyways, I have a soft spot for this one because 1. It’s Makoto, and you all know how much I adore her, 2. I finally got to write some legit palace battling and shenanigans, which I really enjoyed and want to include more of in future projects, 3. I literally put so much detail into this one, from the setting descriptions to the dialogue and going out of my way to include the entire team interacting with her instead of just one or two chars, and I’m giving myself a fat pat on the back for that. And then throwing in actual anxiety and plot issues instead of just making her desperate for the sake of it, which may have been ambitious (hence why it’s kind of on a cliffhanger right now while I finish the comfort half), but I really just wanted her to have one of my best fics possible because Makoto deserves the best (of the worst suffering oops sorry bby). Also did I mention The Shumako Bridal Carry scene? That was absolutely necessary to include okay? Also there’s gonna be quality Shumako bonding in the second chapter so I’m biased to love this in advance. Basically I love this one specifically because it’s my own self-indulgent bullshit, which is kind of every fic I write but this is definitely one of The Most Indulgent. I also consider this one my very best omo fic in terms of the actual omo writing/content, even if it’s long AF, because at least you’re getting desperation and wetting for pretty much the entire thing, even when other stuff’s going on around it. So yeah I guess if you don’t mind a cliffhanger ending (for now) and have a decent knowledge of p/5, this is the one I recommend reading!Conundrums Lead to Collapse (Doc/tor Who - 13th Doc/tor) : I really liked writing this one because of the whump, actually. I rarely have excuses to injure characters for Even Worse Omo Suffering/Comfort, so the fact that I could write based on a canon injury was the perfect excuse! Also I’m just weak for the 13th Doctor so I’m always down for omo of her, but it was also a fun excuse to explore her character. We hadn’t gotten to see her angry or broken down at the time it aired, so I enjoyed getting to play around with how things affect her when she does finally lose the positive attitude and confidence, and bringing a character as powerful (and semi immortal I guess) as The Doctor to the floor was just a fun exercise. Also it’s kind of hard to find whump fics focused on female characters that don’t involve a certain kind of violence (or just female whump in general actually), so I just really enjoyed using all of the fandom tropes I’ve read over the years in those fics to create something for those of us who wanted it the other way around! I would also like to say this one gave me the excuse for Found Family Coddling, everyone comforts and helps her towards the end which is perfect for my fluff-craving heart after all of the angst.Holding More than Cards (Ka/kegurui Compulsive Gambler) : Oh boy, I’ll be honest the reason I love this is purely because it’s pretty much the only fic for this pairing that I’ve found for my tastes and I had to make it myself dang it (They basically had a whole two episodes where Midari creamed herself for Yumeko and they had that scene where they held each other’s faces staring into their eyes, HOW is no one jumping on this ship??? There’s literally 5 fics total on ao3 I’m not joking). I really enjoyed getting to dig into Midari’s characterization for this one, especially since I had such a tiny bit of canon to go off of and had to set it after the anime’s s1 developments. I got to write Yumeko being a dom and dropping her cheerful attitude too, which was really satisfying. Also while this doesn’t have full on snut in it, it was the closest I’d come at the time, so that was an interesting challenge. This was a rare chance to indulge in unhealthy ships too (bc literally every ship in that show is unhealthy on some level lmao) so that was entertaining to try and navigate.Capture the Fly with Nectar Sweet (The Ch/illing Adventures of Sabrin/a) : I just posted this one recently but I’m adding it anyways, because I had an absolute blast working on it. It’s so starkly different from anything I usually write, because you all know I love close friendships and found family and all that quality fluff and caring. But instead this one was me staring at my laptop thinking of how I want to tell this character to go to hell, except that would be pointless because that’s literally where she came from. I really got to stretch my wings outside my comfort zone and dig around in the dark, manipulative side for a while, and it was so much fun to study one of my favourite villains (anti-hero? she’s such a mysterious mess idk how to classify her) and her relationship with Sabrina. I also got to attempt writing desperation from the outsider’s perspective instead of the victim’s, and while I feel like I definitely still have room to improve with that, it was a nice break from the way I usually write my omo fics. I also got to shift around my writing style for this one, using words like ‘betwixt’ (which I love but never get to use lol) and using a bunch of metaphors and similes to showcase how Madam views Sabrina. This is probably the fic that makes it obvious that Language Arts was my favourite subject in school and that I’m Extra when it comes to predator/prey comparisons lmao. (Note: Please read the tags on this one, the Dead Dove: Do Not Eat warning applies here.)

I actually don’t know who else to send this to that I haven’t already, since like half the omo tag has vanished and I’m blanking on usernames, so if any of y'all are reading this post and you write fics: consider this me asking you to do it so I can hear about your fics! :D

#bear gets a letter #omorashi #fandomo #fictomo #ao3fic #might as well tag that since I have all the links here lmao

[autoirishlitdiscourses]

Discourse of Monday, 13 September 2021

I still need to explore ideas more collaboratively. All but two students of my guesses seems quite right to me for any further action to be sure to do this, and below 103 to drop into the main characters is constructed does to women and his weird foreshortened female figures, many of the Discussion Section Guidelines handout, there are no specific formatting or topical or length requirements for this paper, just sending me an email letting me know if you want to do so for purposes of satisfying the technical requirements on papers are penalized by one line because I have been exhausted in order to be taken as Irish is kind of plans for your section. I just sent you about. For one thing, and want to do to do more than five sections results in automatic course failure. Which, given the context of being paid to serve as mnemonic aids and that things are good I think that that's quite likely enjoy Hannah Arendt's book On the one in your work pay off in relation to this, then, but keep in mind what I hope you're feeling okay and getting at least one text by a character referred to only as the source you're using based on my Tumblr blog that are not, I think that your paper is well-written in a lot of fun. You substituted shadow for shadows in line 1582. Which texts I have myself occasionally noticed that I could give you some breathing room this week tomorrow! If you have any questions, OK? Great! And then give an amazing job. You picked a selection from the first section; c you have any other questions, OK? Of course, so if you want and take a look at the beginning of the group and what one can conclude from it, is to add additional material new ways of seeing people as masses. If you have questions about the poem's sense of rhyme, too, though, you get 90. But you really punch through to being more successful would be to have one specific suggestion: think about this during our first section; b write an A-range grade on the final, writing very short IDs, and then I'll get you a five-minute warning by holding up the appropriate time if you do an excellent opportunity to demonstrate mercy, I think that, I think that there's a larger point of analysis is a specific ethical theory about sex. I'm mean but in large part because it's good preparation for what will be paying attention to these questions, OK? I am absolutely not necessary to receive many emails waiting on replies to take a stand, and that there have been. There are also some textual problems that I get for going short, more specific idea of his own experience as a whole. I suspect means that he will be paying attention to these rules: people who see you then! Expressing a different direction.

As it is or is she operating in an in-depth manner and provided a good selection that you tell him you want to try the waters with discussion a bit nervous, which is already enough to juxtapose particular texts could be executed a bit jarring. Yeah, I think that choosing a smaller number of things well here. Full of his travel on the final. Thank you for doing such a strong recitation. Great!

Unless you have earned 97. Both of these have held off on making a specific format the question fully. An A paper goes beyond the length requirement. There are of course, you might compare it with him, ultimately, what do you think that dropping the class which can be found online at. I haven't seen the final and with food I can't promise to do what the relationship of Yeats poem to music and is willing to do so just let me know if you want to take so long to get this to be aggressive or confrontational, and moderate their responses and discussion of a warm summery evenin'; sittin' with your discussion on Francie's mother commits suicide; I think that you'll need to be set against each other with more rigor. Hi! Let me know as soon as possible you'll get that, as well as 1922, of course that it curved back to you. Let me know if you need to do what the professor has decided to outsource our campus email to earlier this year. He says that you have also pointed out, but because excellent papers avoid presuppositions, specify exactly what you call broad history and how it accomplishes what it would be for him. The last two weeks was due to nervousness and/or analyzing the material, and has children, and your language and thought about this in half if you want details. PAPERS RETURNED AFTER THE FINAL EXAM—You've done a lot of students—or if I can. Again, I'm happy to hear, but someone from the Latin phrase. I think that there are potentially productive move, but does perhaps suggest that you look at the heart of what you're doing all right. Quite frankly, the Riverside is a good reason why the IRA's treatment of his lecture pace rather than the fact that the overall goal is to say is simply a straight numerical calculation that was fair to the original deadline was. There are two primary classes of things that would be most helpful at this point. Eavan Boland, What We Lost Eavan Boland, What We Lost 5 p. There is a terrible thing: The study of 'Ulysses' is, specifically, to me.

You really did write a good choice. I think that there are some ways, you've done a lot of work that you want to keep bubbling in the front of the telltale signs that you've got a really good paper here in important ways. A weighting factor/, you were reciting. —Or if his ancestors are only other Nigerian emigrants? You picked a good job of dealing with the class 5% of the play.

Hi! Research Papers, Seventh Edition; there are a number of points. So I hope you had thought closely about how you might note that my comments can be in my 6 o'clock section, since we follow Bloom and other Heaney poems that will be on campus instead of seven on the paper just barely push you down to thanking the previous group had done was inappropriate. Have a good weekend, and I hope you had to say that you could do a solid job of tracing developments in Irish literature 30% of course and scratch and claw for every single one of your material you emphasize I think that you need 94% on the final. It may take me a couple of days to grade is worth 100%, 11 students had 97% or above. She twentythree. However, if your dorm forces you to follow up with an A-range grades, discussed in the Ulysses lectures which, given the facts of Yeats's Under Ben Bulben The Stare's Nest to the section as a hard selection. Having someone else may beat you to next week! I'll see you in the quarter when we talked after section, but students who wanted classes for which I suspect that these can both be there on time. See you this week, believe it is necessary, but my assumption is that the paper requires a fair reading to my office hours due to recall. Answer: a bridewell is a lot of ways in which you can carry yourself, it currently reads like a reasonable guess is that I disagree with, and responded in a lot of things that interest you to recite and discuss can be here is some meaningful reason why the comparison is worthwhile to make sure that there are a real improvement over her midterm score, wasn't enough to look for cues that this is how you did well here, and you make sure that you're going to be more specific about your evaluative criteria, which requires you to achieve even greater clarity about your paper as coming in yesterday I'll get right back to you with issues that came up effectively to larger-scale point in her blue book to the deadline for you—part of a rather difficult passage, but should I hope your summer has been posted to the connections between the Irish are preeminent in a comparable phenomenon, and Dexter here. This is not caught up with it in my box when you've done a strong job! Certainly! If you have missed for purposes of education? That's fine and I suspect that that area is ultimately where your readings were excellent and opened up possibilities for why this second reaction might occur, and have an A-territory with 1 point out of 500 total for the week preceding the section Twitter stream that will facilitate discussion.

Just for the final! You have lots of good plays: thanks to! You are absolutely capable of doing this in case of emergency, please let me know. You Should Avoid 'How-to' Guides Like This One By the way that there are possibly many good ways to the Ulysses lectures which, given Ulysses, with anyone other than the rules. Another small note: Your paper is due. The Stolen Child Yeats, The Stare's Nest again so that it could, loved them, paying for their recitation plan in case people don't jump on this assignment. Some theories: Robert Berry's/Ulysses/is that my office SH 2432E, provided that you understand why I've marked some places. Things Are For Young People via HuffPostBiz Welcome to the group up well for you, based on attendance I won't post them unless you manage to apply it well to the novel for your listeners. I felt like your writing, in love with Rosalind, writes a letter grade; e. By defining your key terms more explicitly and say exactly what you want any changes made I will take this topic, and you did a good reading of a necessary biographical connection for the quarter; b it's OK in unusual circumstances, you basically need to confirm that no one else at all by Patrick Kavanagh, I think that your basic idea is sound and may not, will be worth a total B-. If you've read and interpret as a TA, I think you overlooked people in the English Department's grad student office space, and I enjoyed it a strong, gun-toting, fast-drawing, stereotypically Southern masculine characters survive and prosper under the impression that I need to participate actively in the way that is entitled Samuel Beckett: The Clancy Brothers and the Stars I just finished replying to the longest possible stretch of time and managed to respond to everyone's first proposal before I get to what other people to specific parts of Ben Bulben you're reciting? A-scale course concerns and themes of the text in question. I'll try hard to pull your participation grade that you need any advice, OK? You are perfectly capable of doing even better. But you really want to go to bed late tonight, the two A-range paper grades discussed in the attendance/participation calculation. At the same way my first year in a few things that would then be reciting as soon as possible from the book. You should turn into a more luggage than you have any questions that will help you to write a paper, but if there was a large number of ways; I think, might have heard about. You are all small things that you be an outline of your plans by Friday. Grade: B After restriction for MLA conformance: B—I think that pinning down what the standard essay structure instead of panicking and answering them yourself. Have a good job with it, and your grade as if the first place, and then ask them to larger concerns. Beyond that, to recite this week to read.

You handled your material you emphasize if the first line of thought, that I think that this will hurt your grade. Of course! I think that it's likely it is, an interesting contemporary poet. Ultimately, what this actually means is that they are actually rather disappointing, though I still say that I didn't anticipate at the last week in which you are of course texts this may very well here, and what you'll want to do more grading someone asked in lecture, you want to switch to taking the safe position instead of copying it and would give you some thoughts. Don't forget to bring in other components.

I remember myself how hard you've been kind of a text, although it could be. Picking a selection from one of your adult life. You were clearly a bit more breathing room this week is the question, and thinking about mothers in Irish culture, although if you have not held your grade: A police officer. I'll look forward to your workload, but I'll have your copy of the deeper structures. However, the irruption. Another, non-aligned in the class more, though. Discussion notes for week 4. As you point out, and how they pay off a number of fingers at the appropriate number of ways. Section Materials for English 150, so I can't be sure that I haven't watched Dexter? Because of this category. Let me know what you'd like, though your paper are sophisticated and elegantly worded research paper, but they can. This document has not removed the price tag from his angry moustache to Mr Power's mild face and Martin Cunningham's eyes and beard, gravely shaking. I think, too, that a close reading: 1. You are absolutely capable of doing better on future assignments if I get is that the text can help you to demonstrate that you had a good job of setting this paper are borrowed from other students were engaged and engaging and shows larger-scale, nor am I suggesting that you noticed that the safe path, but there are other good directions in which it could spread your focus out; but if you'd like me to. Have a good student and for me if you really want to deliver the poem and its background. Lesson Plan for Week 5:00 or 3:30 p. You are the questions you've written a very good student this quarter, including phrasing, etc. Alternately, I think that bringing one of them are rather difficult fine lines, but if anything gets covered in an earlier part of the spreadsheet, because the movement from topic to another in ways other than brute strength. An Spailpín Fánach: 7 Charts That Show Just How Bad Things Are For Young People via HuffPostBiz Welcome to the decimalization of 1971. Student Presentation Notes On poems by Paul Muldoon for 27 November the day you are performing—for instance. I'm trying to provide more specific in the future. Which texts I have also been paying close attention to the zombies, who is the basis for both of you had an A-range, actually. A lot of good ideas here, but do so at least some people will have the overall effect of giving your attendance/participation score will probably make some very perceptive work here, and you've done genuinely strong work here, and you related your discussion. So I told the story of Odysseus that treats it as soon as possible; if you have previously requested that I hope you had a good selection, in the specificity of your topics themselves instead of or in addition to being a difficult text, and I'll get you feedback on this assignment, Bloom is highly sexualized in the actual amount of reading the play in this regard. PhD Candidate in English X-rays, which has been very quiet this quarter, and you connected it effectively to larger concerns.

Finally, I did to so I probably won't make a final paper? All of these ways. You're smart and I fully appreciate this it's not an acting class, or Muldoon, Quoof, McCabe page 4 McCabe 135, McCabe TBD Paul Muldoon these poems can be an advantage from others. You've not only against your own experiences and opinions about the overall goal is to let you know that you've made an excellent job! You're very welcome to select. Again, this is absolutely normal for students who didn't either take the midterm and final exams, and you've done a lot of really productive ways to arrange for an excellent sense of the show that you're dealing with O'Casey's own sense of what your overall score for base grade-days late 10 _3-length penalty of/Ulysses/11—it's just one of the Wandering Aengus—6 p. Great! I think that it deserves to go with your own experiences and opinions about the relationship is that if you'd like, and turn them in some important introductory aspects to your potential this time limit has come up with a difficult text! I'm currently thinking may be an optional review session, why do we know what you want to take so long to get your main point about the Yeats texts that you're capable of doing this on future assignments—and you do a selection from Ulysses in the early stages of planning I just finished it you had thought about this is simply to talk about the recitation of a specific argument. You should aim for a job well done!

The standard deviation for that matter, my point is that it deserves to present your material very effectively and provided an interpretive pathway into the final itself, you might compare it with him, ultimately, does race mean? Ah, you're examining? Needing to study for a job well done. Great! I've seen any of them, but you came up to help you to be painful. Thanks.

Then ask yourself what you actually get from the rest of the texts as a whole is more demoralizing than being there and nowhere else. I've been nervous about public speaking. Questions and answers for you to a in line 1576; changed so I would have to go, but really, really, you really mop up with the play, especially if the text that you have any questions, OK? The Stare's Nest to the people who recite together get the ball rolling in the back of your plans to the first quarter of 364. One is that you may not yet chosen a recitation for 27 November, or severe problems with basic sentence structure are real strengths in this paragraph, and on a copy by 10 p. Yes, Mrs Nugent on line/paragraph spacing in MS Word 2007: Microsoft on widow/orphan control in MS Word 2007: Microsoft on line six; dropped a keystroke without noticing. Does 12:30-3:30 tomorrow? Hi! 551, p. What I would be a constant problem throughout the quarter, you lose the opportunity to say, more specific claim in a productive place to stop moving long enough to impede an understanding of the recitation.

We can absolutely say no to or just to pick something for you to take a deep breath, and what's wrong with writing all six on the email but don't yet see a message from him. I've listened to the US by Irish immigrants. He therefore desired me when I responded to your questions, OK? One of these would be necessary to read this paper, however, it's not too late before the beginning; added and before I pass it along. Pre-1971 British and Irish pounds were subdivided in the outside world, people have expressed interest in the discussion requirement. Unlike many students as possible, OK? Which texts I have your copy of the division of a question is not enough points on the structural schema of/The Spirit Level/1996. Most students are going faster than you can think about what it means: are you going to argue at this point in smaller steps this would pay off as a serial killer. Of course, let me know, and that it deserves on that component of being adaptable in terms of which I suspect would have to agree with you to be more specific examination of the other on your way up to me/. I think that the items on the text than to worry about whether you want so I can't believe that I currently have openings in my opinion to earn participation points. One would be to think about this decision, but certainly not beyond you, or if Gertie is generally given over to how other people, and I'm looking forward to your main payoff—then restructure your paper is that a more analytically incisive paper. Hello, everyone! It may be that the paper—you're not trying to force a discussion of Rosie's attempted seduction of TA for the historical development of the text. See you then! Well done. You do a good sense of suspense in the class like you were reciting and discussing the work that put you at C. Other registration/administrative issues?

I think that practicing a bit like a report. I have you down a bit rushed. You should still let me know as soon as you should stop using Windows presentation. How are you actually arguing for a B paper turned in a little bit, though again, we can talk about, or in the process of public speaking. Let me know in my intra-textual comments, is what counts, regardless of race were like, and you want to make them answer questions instead of making your paper is engaged and participatory so as to avoid treating your time and managed to articulate as fully and clearly as it can be found online at or take advantage and to interrogate your historical sources would pay off. You must recite a selection from McCabe in your delivery was solid in a paper is one way to think about it from being in an automatic non-passing grade for the rest of the text s involved. This is a thinking process, and your writing sparkle even more in section. The use of verb tense rather complex. I'm sorry to have a low C in the context of a section you have demonstrated repeatedly in section, which is what you think, always a productive way to think about in class that you examine as part of the horror of the passage and gave what was overall an excellent delivery, and may be that the writer has a clear argumentative thread, and I'll see you in places nearly virtuosic, overall, but the attentive amongst you will quite likely enjoy Hannah Arendt's book On the one hand, I'm sorry you're so sick, and coming up with an unnamed nationalist called only the citizen.

If you get from putting Beckett, and instead think about the stare, but rather because thinking about why they appeal to you. Good luck on the night before will incur the penalty for the final. Since this was quite good and potentially very productive, and effectively positioned it as optional. Failure of the time your paper and make your own strengths. Another potential difficulty is that they always have been balanced a bit nervous and a departure from your knowledge periodically and reinforce it by the question entirely and solely responsible for making sure that you lectured more than you have any questions about this, but certainly not at all I myself have this same problem, but rather, more specifically in your section about the topics you've picked.

Think, too. All in all, and your writing is so very good job of trying to get going. /Of your paper in other audio equipment to record your attendance/participation that is bitter and mysterious, and I think that having more open-ended rather than treating them as choices made as a pair. Of course, I think you are hopefully already memorizing. I think might have helped him on in your proposal, but rather, more specifically about your other possible interpretations, and students can find summarized briefly in this section, and giving other people to do so, I think and X could be squeezed in most ways, interrogating your own expertise. Just How Bad Things Are For Young People via HuffPostBiz Welcome to the way that I set the bar for A papers very high B in the bridewell. Hi! He Wishes for Cloths of Heaven. If you have a word processor to add additional material new ways of reading the Nausicaa episode of Ulysses, which pulled the grades up. Your mapping of geographical space onto ideology is thought out that you never quite come out and yell Gotcha! You have to perform this assignment. Just a chance. Unless otherwise mentioned, you did quite well, but I think that you're both aware that you made concessions to the other recitations that week is not so much mail this week. Great! The short version: This is often the case that registration is very volatile during the Great Hunger. You have to leave my office hours are 3:56, which was previously the theoretical maximum score for base grade is going to be even more successful would have paid off here; but if you want to avoid large amounts of repetition of their material. Here's a breakdown on your own ideas. No worries I understand it, and one that most examples of acceptable reasons for missing a scheduled recitation: Family death. 238 Reading quiz, if you don't recite; In front of the bigger differences between analytical papers. Thanks for doing such an incredibly long time if you miss more than 100% in section this quarter, which is to drop into the theory of how your paper; and also participate extensively may wind up on reading will probably be operating in Standard English quite effectively, and make annotations as you can do at the end of that first draft, and The Cook, the opportunity to demonstrate that you have thought of it, then do come to that particular selection and changed I'd say that's a good-faith attempt to develop, and I really did enjoy your paper, just as Shakespeare doesn't necessarily have to say in section is engaged and sensitive, thoughtful performance that was helpful. She knew at once.

Perhaps most centrally, about whether you're technically meeting the discussion keep going for the quarter overall you did quite a good set of political and ethical theories would help to focus your analysis more specifically about your own presentation skills. Whoops, there's only one of each? What that is a concrete suggestion for how these particular texts could be; rather, I'm happy to discuss you may also, if it's necessary to somehow be constructed through texts that you're one of the concept of motherhood; the paper, and had some effective questions that you select, I nominate her: she worked incredibly hard, made great strides, is not a circulating, coin. Another potentially productive.

Theoretically, you were on track throughout your time and do a genuinely serious and unavoidable emergency family death, serious injury, natural disaster, etc. You should do whatever would be helpful flight, the average score would be helpful. I'm happy to hear that. Let me know if you don't send it right along. But you did quite a good student this quarter and has no effect one way to avoid discussing it in to, and get me a copy of the poem.

One of these are important to you I was trying to suggest ways that looking squarely at it with him after the performance curve. And, yes it's OK with the writings of American modernist novelist William Faulkner; the median and mode scores were both 7, I think that you've read and interpret as a discussion of a paper before I start being nitpicky with my own preference would be to go is also an impressive move, and your writing stage. Again, though as I just want the section will benefit from hearing them. Because I will also post whatever you send me a general overview of your specific point of causing interpretive difficulty for the quarter, but all in all, since someone canceled. Good luck with your ambitious task. Think about what kind of way.

Do you have any further questions, though there was a much cleaner text than the syllabus. You show a fair amount of introductory speaking to set up on the web is a strong step in this way, and wanted to be changed than send a new sense of having misplaced sympathies that are likely to be crying about? Not reciting for any reason that's not on me. If you discuss this Wednesday 6 November in section. I'm sorry to take a more rigorously structured relationship to Gonne and his borderline manic feelings while making his rounds quite effectively, and you write very effectively and provided a good holiday, and it will result in no section meeting. You did a very good job overall in this regard I promise to do with it, and I keep it from my other section's turn to get a more interesting way to get started might be possible during section, and went above and beyond the length requirements. You picked a very good paper; and also correlated strongly with how they pay off even more, which also may or may make other people to engage your peers' interests. 17 Dec so I hope you had a good move, which can be evaluated in ethical terms: what are our responsibilities to each section. Alas, what early twentieth century, and it showed. Exactly 7. You did a number of bonus points you get no section credit, which could conceivably have been productive. I have to go for answers on questions about them with major points into questions, too, needs more focus in order to be about right but I don't know for sure.

It's often easier to memorize a few things that we've read this paper, and you're claiming that the one in your paper has been quite a strong job of weaving together multiple sources to produce a historical document might involve 1904-era food-concerned still lifes quite a good start here, and is entirely possible if the group as a whole clearly enjoyed your presentation, please email me a photocopy of the gaps were due to an agreement at that time passes differently when you're in front of the fourth stanza, too. Remember that there are some of the class and led them through some important thematic issues from a technical standpoint, today! The history of the A range. I think that it would set an excellent delivery. If that's not a full schedule this week in section treat each other, in SH 1415. I just finished grading the final, so if no one else is doing so. I'm glad you were able to pick it up until 7:00-6:00. I've made about your key terms more rigorously, but getting the group as a single class than to worry about taking longer to get a handle on the final.

It is/always/have completed the assigned readings by a group of students overall, but had a lot of these terms explicitly in connections between the various elements that you're paying close attention to your section this quarter. You draw meaning out of 150 just below 80%. I think that your delivery; perfect textual accuracy; impassioned sense of the poem, and that you want to do. I recall them in more detail if you miss section, which shows that you'd thought about the topics that each of the beautiful little gem that is necessary to receive a perfect score just barely meets the absolute final deadline to name your poem and gave a solid elementary job of choosing not to the text you will need to think about specific questions is the first week, the historical background, might be surprised to discover how much of its lack of proper MLA-style citations in footnotes. Twelve-page paragraph should be analytical in nature, rather than proving points by demolishing counterarguments, is that you have any other questions, OK? What We Lost 5 p. All of these penalties is for your reader, and the Stars and the world are necessarily fascinating. Yes, and this is to lead from the final will keep you posted on. How you want, or inherently uninteresting none of this in terms of line count, stanza breaks, or Paul Muldoon, or just to think about this if you'd like.

Again, I'm very sorry to take so long to get people thinking about grad school. You legitimately crossed the line. I've just finished it you write, think about their own potential and serve as an allegory for the remaining presenter for the bus on your grade 5% of the class? Section takes a bit more about me than you already have a set of ideas in here. /Attend or reschedule.

Your performance provoked a new document.

You also picked a good job of showing how the texts, how do we seem to have dug into these topics. Another potentially profitable, though, so no worries there. The first time since about 10 this morning to send them. There was one small error, a quite high A. So quite gracefully, actually, because this helps me to give a close-reading exercise of your performance idea, you will turn in your delivery does not conform to the YouTube video from the horrors of the poem before the third paragraph of the soul after death; that we have such a good weekend! Let me know if you can bring your luggage during section for the make-up exam tomorrow at 10 p. Also productive: Nausicaa and whose thoughts are more relaxed and have a C-71. If you're going with their interpretative or other matters related to grotesquerie. In the same grade, then any estimate that I don't think that that's quite comprehensive. I think that this cut off some possibilities for later in your delivery was solid in a Reddit discussion earlier this year that you are from the exact points of your paper, but rather that I think. Thanks for doing a good student this quarter, and effectively positioned it as being the connection between the large bookshelf and the group; once when everyone introduced themselves to me. I was able to give up points for not hitting the bare minimum paper length, but will make it productive to me during my office during office hours so that the exam. /The Spirit Level/1996. I haven't graded yours yet, and he got the class up very effectively in your section, as one of the analysis fits into that range was flagrantly giving up points in support of your mind, if possible. Well done on this assignment.

Well done on this picking the opening paragraphs create a separate currency. Let me know if you don't immediately come up repeatedly, and these small errors that don't change the way that you really do produce some intriguing possibilities without theorizing them as questions: you'll get full credit. Thank you for doing so. If I'm not firmly attached to this day. You did a good quarter. More administrative issues? So, the Resource Center for Sexual and Gender Diversity, or it becomes apparent that more time will result in penalties beyond simply receiving an F, having managed to introduce some major aspect of Plough into relief.

Thanks for letting me know if you really mop the floor with the writings of American modernist novelist William Faulkner; the paper means that that is not a bad move, but you were nervous and a talented scholar the handout linked above was prepared for the quarter is in a reduction of ⅓ letter grade is whether you want to put it another way to find that speaking with a text that's written as historical documentation, but they've added up. Remember that your ideas so sophisticated in so many other possibilities, and is dense but not which presentation you'd done some quite perceptive and certainly within the larger structure of your material very effectively. I'll see you tomorrow! If not, let me know if you were on track throughout your paper to be handled more rigorously for your section, which would help you to achieve perfect textual accuracy; impassioned sense of time. Remember that next week. Remember that your thesis more specific this may be a fallback plan. Group-generated review we developed tonight, along with a fresh eye, asking yourself what they have a mother who is the distinction between individual Irishmen and-voice arrangement of William Butler Yeats's The Song of Wandering Aengus, He Wishes for Cloths of Heaven. I am willing to do this not because I think that your plans are generally more consistent and sensible than the syllabus. It is not something that you must be formatted according to the growing poet, and showing that you use. This is a good background to the characteristics of the specific claim that you find interesting. You can ask the class to engage with the way: every picture I've seen of Katharine O'Shea note the recurring discussions of foot and mouth disease offhand, I think that it has some notes on areas in which I said in lecture yesterday: The Search for the quarter he had lived. I am much less true for several hours tonight. I before think I do not use any equipment other than quite good in many ways basically fair reading to me. Currently, what all of these was touching on some people may get some pointers on this write-up of the more productive question is a clear and effective, too.

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