sorry to reappear here just to be genuine on main but I'm deep in the finals soup right now so naturally I've been having Thoughts
I've been thinking about when I was 25 and finishing my associate's degree and applying to transfer to get my bachelor's. and I knew I wanted to do grad school and I was so anxious about finishing everything as quickly as possible because I was already going to be in my 30s (the horror!) by the time I finished school and would be able to actually "start my career"
but you know what I did instead? fell in love with a new subject. started thinking about other degree programs. took way too many classes my senior year and burned myself out and decided to take a year off after undergrad to decide what I wanted to do. and then COVID happened and I decided to keep waiting and I came out as trans, and I realized actually the thing I wanted to do was still what I wanted when I was 25.
so I applied to law school. and I thought, ok, this is fine. I'll get through the next three years and then I can REALLY start living my life when I'm 34.
but friends. do you know what happened instead? I fell in love with the thing everyone made me expect to hate, that I thought was going to be just a necessary evil I had to suffer through to get out into the world and practice. to finally get started.
I've been looking at phd programs now. I've been systematically harassing all my professors about how to do what they do and I've been reading their scholarship and I've been rotating the erie doctrine in my mind like it's my new fucking blorbo
and when I first realized that oh fuck, maybe I do actually still have some interest in academia? and legal academia, of all things? I thought, well shit, now I'm not going to REALLY get started until I'm in my 40s. and I was MAD. I was mad at myself for every point in the last 31 years where a different choice might have theoretically gotten me here sooner. I was mad at the legal profession and the academy for working the way that it does and I was mad at God and the universe for making me want things and then making them hard.
but look. what have I been doing all this time if not living my life? what am I doing right now if not starting my career?
my point is. my point is I actually love getting older and learning new things about myself, even if sometimes I'm the last one to know them. and I loved the experiences I had in undergrad and I love the experiences I'm having now, and I'm accumulating a whole list of other experiences to have and things to learn that I think I'll love too. and this shit isn't some race for the finish line or a checklist of things to do in the exact right order or at the exact right age. it's just... life. and sometimes it's weird and sometimes it's hard and sometimes things don't go the way you wanted or the way you thought they were going to, and I think that's probably fine actually?
idk. I just wanted to share.
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the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.
capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.
now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.
and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.
and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.
and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".
it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"
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A Persuasive Argument - dpxdc
"Great!" Danny says, clapping his hands together to get everyone's attention. The dinner table falls silent as everyone looks towards him. It's a full house today and, honestly, Danny's a little nervous. "I'm sure you're all wondering why I gathered you here today."
"It's dinnertime. In our house." Duke mutters, while doing a very bad job of concealing his yawn. He holds his fork poised over the braised beef, but, just like everyone else, still looks towards Danny before tucking in. It's intriguing enough to wait.
"Yeah, no one misses Alfie's dinner." Dick says, with a brilliant smile that Danny can't help but return.
"Precisely! What better time to talk to you all than when you're all actually here!"
"Wait, I thought you came round to work on our English essays?" Tim asks, blinking owlishly.
"I'm afraid I've lured you here under false pretences, Tim."
"This is where I live."
"I would still really appreciate help on that essay though, I mean, what the hell is Hamlet even about? I just don't get that old time-y language, like 'Hark! A ghost hath killed me!' - absolute rubbish, what does that even mean?"
"The ghost never kills anyone in Hamlet, he's there to tell Hamlet that he was murdered. Have you actually read it?"
"No, but it sounds like you have. Tim, I want this guy to help me with my essay instead. I know for a fact that you haven't read Hamlet, either."
"So? We don't need Jason, I've read the Sparknotes."
"Hi Jason, I'm Danny, pleasure to meet you, summarise Hamlet in three sentences or less."
"Am I auditioning to help you write your essays? I can't believe you’ve gone through your whole school life without reading it, it’s good!"
"Hamlet, along with a number of other classics, was banned in our house because it portrayed ghosts as intelligent and sympathetic beings rather than evil, animalistic beasts. I didn’t even get to see The Muppet's Christmas Carol until last year with Tim! It was surprisingly good, and I hate Christmas because everyone always argued and it sucked. But we're getting off topic. I—"
"No, no, please go back to that, because what the fu—"
"Boys, please." Bruce interrupts, looking to the world as if he wants to hang his head in his hands. "Danny, you were about to say something?"
"Oh, yeah, Mr. Wayne! Thanks!"
"Please, call me Bruce."
"Well, that very succinctly brings me to my point, because I'd actually really like to call you dad."
Nobody says a word. Nobody even blinks, all as shocked as the other, watching open-mouthed as Danny pulls his laptop out from beside his chair. Bruce can definitely feel a headache coming on.
"Before you say anything, I've prepared a 69 slide PowerPoint presentation on why you, Bruce Wayne, should adopt me, Danny Last-Name-Pending. Please save your questions, comments, and verdict until the end, thank you."
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