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#so i feel better
leafwateraddict · 2 months
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Was feeling really frustrated with my art today
Transcript under the cut
First panel: you frustrated?
Second Panel: art is different for everyone. it takes time and practice remember?
Third panel: everyones different [illegible]. you’ve just gotta keep telling yourself that until you believe it. everyone learns at their own pace. just because you don’t get it yet doesn’t make you stupid.
Fourth panel: you’ve got this kid 💙
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arambleaway · 1 year
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It takes a village to kill a child
Hatake Sakumo does not raise Kakashi. A kunai tucked into too-small hands, a house empty more often than full, and a bloody goodbye, do not a father make. 
Namikaze Minato does not raise Kakashi. Attention split thrice, then thrice more, a commander’s orders, and a teacher’s critique do not a father make. 
Konohagakure does not raise Kakashi. They shelter and house him, but harsh whispers, scornful gazes and unfair treatment do not a home make. 
Kakashi is not raised by any hand, for in perhaps all the small and large ways that matter he is grown and buried too soon. If it takes a village to raise a child, it takes one to kill them as well.
Kakashi is raised by war. By a dozen different commander’s scorn and harsh orders. By a hundred enemy shinobi. By the sharp betrayal of hidden traitors and the chaos of all out battle. War raises and kills him before he is 12, and when peace does arrive, it arrives as a parent’s new partner– untrusted and untested. 
Kakashi is given no time to take the measure of this new parent before war returns to reassure their lost child that they haven’t left using the face of the Kyuubi. The small village that might have tried to challenge the claim of war crumbles and he finds himself uncertain and adrift. War is there to console him like any good parent. Peace is accepted because for all its arrival, war is still there and it still needs Kakashi. The shadows become his new siblings and together they play and argue and grow until it is hard to tell who the adopted child is. 
Kakashi emerges into the lauded planes of adulthood, dripping in the red of his parent and wrapped in a cloak of his sibling’s weave. He stands in the village that in some lifetime might have raised him, and knows in his bones that he is allowed only for who raised him, the hammer of war in his head, the hope of ill-fitting peace in his chest, and the shadows that he joins as though a part of them.
Hatake Kakashi is the beloved child of war and peace and shadows who stands in a crumbling village, tearing at the seams, screaming that no other might find in him family. Screams and bleeds himself near dry in chakra and blood and dreams, and when the village that kills him asks that he might lead, he bows his head and accepts the hat. 
And in the fall out of another war, another family reunion, he promises ‘no more’. He promises that his Konoha shall see all her children raised by parents and guardians and love, and that never again will he look down into the eyes of a child and see a new sibling staring back.
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aqpippin · 3 months
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guilty pleasure — looking at the ED list for all the stupid baby names in the waiting room 😌
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delirious-comfort · 2 years
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Me: a non-native English speaker who definitely knows the difference between lay and lie
Also me: consistently uses lay in all the wrong ways
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randomalistic · 4 months
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Selfshippers who ship with weird/unappealing characters. I love you. Like hell yeah you go get with Mr Crocker. Go get with lord faarquad
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trudlejack · 2 months
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(+part 2)
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moncuries · 4 months
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guess what i watched on new years (a redraw kind of)
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hansoeii · 9 months
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cozylittleartblog · 9 months
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@staff if you [change] the [design] of the fucking [dashboard] i will kill you
edit. i want it on the actual post that i am not actually making a de-th threat against the staff. that's shitty. the caption quotes the fucking costco hot dog meme, which i originally said in the tags. if any staff member sees this please do Not take it personally
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uncanny-tranny · 3 months
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I think so many people are so deeply alienated from themselves that they have no clue how to exercise their free will and autonomy. For some, this alienation runs so deep that they are afraid of their own autonomy and humanity. It is completely understandable why one would have those feelings, but it can be worrisome.
I want to help others who feel this way, so here are small things I have done to exercise my free will:
Add "guilty pleasure" songs to playlists and actually listen to them (I have a ton of late 1990s-early 2000s music I listen to now proudly that I never listened to in the past out of shame)
Getting the décor item, bath set, bed spread, ect. in the patterns you like, even if it's "childish" (I got a dinosaur-themed wastebasket from the kids' décor section and I adore it)
Taking a new route to get to a place you go to often
Eat dessert first
Celebrate well, and often
Collect things that are "odd" or don't seem like an "acceptable" thing to collect (somebody on my "for you" page collects dandelion crayola crayons and it was so cool!!!!!!)
Incorporate one new piece in an outfit you wear frequently (e.g., a new chain, a necklace, ribbons, bracelets, ect.). Challenge yourself to add onto the outfits if you feel up for it.
Sing along to songs without worrying that you sound "good" or your intonation is completely accurate
Read a book from a genre you weren't allowed to read as a kid (comics, thrillers, mysteries, anything!)
Walk without having a specific destination or goal
Pick up a new craft without expecting yourself to master it or to ever be "good" enough. Get your hands messy.
I don't want to shame anybody for not feeling as though they have free will or that they are exempt from exercising it. However, I wanted to give ideas so that you might read this list and find your own ways to express your intrinsic autonomy and will. You deserve to be a person, to feel alive, not just living. That is what our lives are for.
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mroddmod · 8 days
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everyone be quiet i'm manifesting
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thelonelyafab · 6 months
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feeling misewable gonna go get drinks and try to make some plans 4 tha weekend !
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thatbarricade · 9 months
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noo don’t cry about july ending and the time passing, just remember the july poem :)
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unpretty · 2 months
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the thing about having been really broke. averaging $500 a month in a good year broke. using a gamestop credit card i shouldn't have qualified for to buy taco bell gift cards for food broke. is that i am SO bad with money. i have a degree in accounting and i am so bad with money. i do not think of myself as superstitious at all but money feels so cursed. not in a spiritual way, i mean literally. practically.
having 'too much' money feels so bad. money is a thing you spend as soon as you get it because it's so cursed. the more it is the more cursed it is. i save too much money and bad things will happen that cost all my money. money is a thing that summons expenses. if i have no money and the car breaks down i find a way to make it work. i scrounge and resell and pass the hat and talk to my mom's friend's friend who knows a guy and in the end i'm so relieved to be right back where i started. but if i were saving my money for a new computer and then the car broke down, the money is just gone. i spent the money i saved for a thing i wanted on a thing i needed instead and after all that hoping i'm right back where i started.
i get a windfall and i set the money aside because if i'm careful that's enough to pay for gas for months. but then i need to pay for heat and i apply for assistance and they look at my bank account and see i have money and now they won't help pay for heat. soon it's just a habit. i get the money and i spend the money. immediately, as soon as possible, get this money away from me. don't even save enough for cigarettes. i can find money for cigarettes, somehow i can always find money for cigarettes. cigarette money is a weird magical fake money i summon from dark corners whenever i run out of cigarettes. i don't know how it works either. i've tried to summon the cigarette money for things that aren't cigarettes and it never works. just get this out of my bank account. get it out of here before something notices there's money here.
anyway i'm working on it but god it's hard
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dixiedingo · 8 months
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Made a friend at the library today and I didn't self destruct let's fucking gooooo
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andthebeanstalk · 11 months
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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