the image of Levi chucking his index and thumb under your chin to gently push your jaw back in place — I am a whore, it’s just so hot 😩 he does it slowly too, holding your gaze the whole time. you can’t help but get all hot and bothered. like you’re flustered as hell on top of discovering how loaded your friend-to-lover actually is, and of course he doesn’t have an explanation or words for it 🙄 just lets you take it all in and then ask 🙄
penthouse pool date though, Mie, you genius. it’s a private pool too. cozy. so it may be outdoors, but Levi is as clingy and as touchy as he is in private. hey, y’all are alone anyway, he’s gonna savor it, especially when it gets you riled up. there’s a jacuzzi on the side too, and well, just say you both loose track of time and end up a little bit wrinkly 😌 he’s cooking a late dinner of course, chucks your phone onto the sofa (affectionately) when you say you could just browse UberEats. him cooking is a delectable sight though, sigh 😌
He’s so... he knows what he’s doing, but then again does he truly understand what he’s doing... he does everything with such ease, it seems so natural, maybe this is just how he is with everybody. But, yeah, he’s gonna be so touchy the entire time, even if his movements are physically light—a hand brushing past your wrist, carefully maneuvering you by your elbow when you stop and stare at something for too long (you have a whole house tour to complete, after all)—his touch feels heavy, weighted, and very purposeful.
Of course he’s cooking a late dinner, and of course he spoons a taste of the sauce into your mouth, gently demanding to know your opinion; swears he won’t be offended if you tell him it needs something, the point is for him to tailor it to your taste after all. Doesn’t let you help out much other than that though, he emphasizes that you are his guest, and this is his treat to you; and watching him maneuver around his kitchen is a treat, indeed.
You try to be somewhat of a good house guest, offer to go pick up ice cream or a pastry from whatever bakery is still open—because he sprung this whole thing on you and you didn’t get to prepare any sort of housewarming gift—but he clicks his teeth, throws your phone to the side for a second time. You protest while he walks back to the kitchen, but your words fall on deaf ears, and just when you’re about to fish your phone yourself, his chivalry be damned, you realize that he’s pulling an ice cream machine from his cupboard of appliances. You almost think you’re mistaken, until you hear his calling to you, back turned as he opens his fridge and inquires, “Strawberry or peach?”
Listen... I just really like DPR. Listen to them. I also noticed they had a few variants of Great Vacation so I went and made a very amateur mashup of my favorite parts of each version(... mostly just the raven locks and kp remix versions but shh)
Different versions I used with their originals because oh my god listen to DPR im begging:
(1:33-1:37): The Cage version
(0:08-1:09, 1:38-3:01, 4:00-4:38): The Raven Locks version
(0:00-0:07, 1:10-1:32, 3:02-3:59): The KP Remix version
i like. don't even miss dating necessarily—or i mean, i don't know, maybe i would if i had any relationships to look back on that hadn't in retrospect been toxic in some way, lol; i do miss sex! or at least, i miss the delight and playfulness and pleasure it used to bring me, back when i had it and was open to it. but the idea of making myself that vulnerable, even in passing, and not just feeling totally humiliated afterwards is—unimaginable now: on the far side of that same unbreakable soundproof glass that hangs immovably between me and any normal human functioning not numbed or crushed into frozen smallness…
but i do miss feeling—i don't know, worth dating? worthy of dating? as though i were someone anyone might look at and think were attractive or fascinating or delightful. and ultimately really it's about how i feel about myself, and not about anyone else at all—someone could tell me i was all those things to them tomorrow, and i almost certainly wouldn't believe them—but it's also about being cut off from the world, disqualified to participate, a zoo animal staring forlornly out from an inadequate enclosure that no one comes to visit...
Do you have any other thoughts abt the bug familiars town? :o that idea sounds reALLY INTERESTING and if u have other ideas abt it I'd love to hear!
Unfortunately not, I haven't done much with it despite having the idea for months- it just doesn't fit neatly into my character verse yet and I don't want to make another world for it so. I'm just letting it stew in the back of my mind for now. I did come up with some possible character ideas, including a psychiatrist/therapist based on a golden target tortoise beetle and, the two teen protagonists, with a fly and death’s head hawk moth familiar respectively. Although this can always change later.
[ID: A digital drawing of 2 human teens. On the left is a light-skinned teen wearing a leather jacket, jeans, and colorful scarf, with a common green bottle fly familiar. The teen on the right is a dark-skinned girl with various piercings, plaid skirt, vest, goth boots, and a death’s-head hawk moth familiar. End ID]
Ayyyy!! Congratulations on 400!! 🎊💐💫 u deserve all of it and shit ton more!! I'm so sorry if I'm a bit late but I wanted to send this earlier but Tumblr said "No❤️" and if u r still doing the header/icon request, do u mind making stucky halloween header? It's never too early is it? And it's fine if not! Congratulations again!💞🤗
AAAAHHHHH I FINALLY FINISHED! SORRY I'M SCREAMING, it's just–VINDICATION! ok, stopping now (I took so long and it feels so good to finish 😌)
Thank you so much Izzy, I hope you like! 😘💖💝
Bonus: (because the background gave me an idea)
I’m just speaking into the void here, but in the process of making my neat little WIP chart last night (believe me when I say this is only a very small portion of it 😂)
I suddenly remembered some of the drafts I still have saved in my old laptop but wasn’t able to recover, because the damn thing won’t stay on even when it’s plugged in 🙄 and I got a little sad. I wouldn’t mind getting it fixed (would have saved me buying a new one at least lol) but when I say the thought of some random computer guy looking through my documents only to realize I write anime boy porn rattles me to my core … how would I ever recover 😂
I originally thought it was a problem with the charger so I bought a universal cord with different plug in jacks you can swap out but that didn’t work so maybe it’s an issue with the battery? Either way, I really have to question why I didn’t start using Google docs sooner, it would have saved me a BUNCH of headache 🥴 Really kicking myself in the ass tbh
the fact that they decided to wrap up vanessa ives’ arc by killing her, after her torture and suffering, after her continual battles for agency and with her mental illness, after she so boldly asserted her worth and the power of her self (one thing yet remains to me. I remain), and then they said no, actually, she is so mired in pain and trauma, she has seen so much darkness, that she cannot ever find peace, she cannot live, and she has to die at the hand of someone who deeply loves her, and while she bleeds in his arms, she’ll say it’s okay, because she sees heaven/god - whether this is true or not, we have no idea, because part of her entire arc was her damaged relationship with her faith and the fact that god (if he/she/they exist) does nothing to help her, even when she is beset by the literal devil, and indeed she has worked to free herself from the strict trappings of religious devotion - and we are supposed to find this good when it’s an absolute betrayal of her freedom and all she stood for, and it’s like blotting out the sun, and every character who revolved around her is left in tattered mourning, knocked me out with a ponderous, foggy grief for days.
and i watched all of penny dreadful in about a month, so it’s not even that she was with me for a lengthy span of time, but i loved her instantly and dearly and empathized with her on levels i can’t quite explain, and it felt like a knife to the heart and some bewildering condemnation of parts of me.
and then they did this, in very, very similar beats to dean (a whole discussion could be had about parallels between vanessa’s arc and his, the fact that she’s a victorian gothic horror romantic heroine and he’s a gothic horror romantic hero filtered through modernity notwithstanding), and that relationship was fifteen years, that empathy and projection and love got ingrained in my very being, and every time i remember that i think, right, so it’s no small wonder why it lapsed me into mourning from which it’s been difficult to recover