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#so i slept till 3
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i’m about to finish my 30th hour of being awake and i have so much energy it’s literally insane what the fuck is going on with my body???????????????

#yall what- whats going on 😭#remember me 3 hours ago being like ''i have to survive till 10pm''????#WELL . I SHOULDVE SLEPT THEN BECAUSE IM DANCING AND NOT TIRED RN#i didn't even drink anything???? no coffee no energetic drink nothing other than water lmaosgjhdkgj#like.. i yawn but it's not one of those im going to fall asleep in 3 secs#it's one of those u do in the middle of the day for no reason#but here it's been 30 hours since i've closed my eyes for a long period of time#i'll try to go to sleep before 12 just so if i do fall asleep and i end up sleeping like 12 hours i still wake up at a good time sjfkhkjsf#in the mean time . im gonna continue giffing kyungsoo <3#((if u wanna know about that follow me on my sideblog it's seokwonoo i mostly rb shit and it's all svt))#((but it's a fun time))
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#the more I find out about my childhood the more I’m like hmm yes#the trauma makes sense now 😂😂#like idk this might sounds stupid but I love my mom she’s an amazing person#but as a parent she really just dropped the ball#the shit the used to pull is absolutely insane#like I hear about stuff and I’m just so disappointed in her?#like she used to leave us kids home alone a lot and go out drinking which I knew#like she wouldn’t come home till the morning kind of thing and#but I thought it was when we were a little older but no#my brother and I were 1 and 3 and she left us home#like?#and getting into drugs and stuff idk it happens ig but wow#when I was three she moved us to Montana and while we were there we lived in a shelter which I do remember#we lived there for a whole ass year.. in a shelter before my grandma made her move in with her#and after that idk#she’s depressed and has been forever like she had a rough childhood so#she spends a lot of time sleeping#she used to just lock us in the room with her while she slept#which sounds bad but idk#that’s why my family has such a weird relationship with sleeping because my grandma didn’t like my mom sleeping all the time#so it just became a bad thing to do#idk there’s another thing that I don’t want to talk about but my childhood was rough#rambles#as type A personality control freak slightly abusive my grandma is lmao I will always be grateful that she raised us#becuase the fact that we were as safe as we were while we were with my mom is a fucking miracle
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