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Yall so I applied to this data analysis job and got an interview which I went to last week anyway I got a job offer but the want me to start April 1st and I won’t be able to start until May and I’m kinda freaking out because they’re like we’ll talk in May good luck! So like does that mean the offer stands or like are they gonna revisit this whole thing in May and see if they still need me???

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i wonder what it’s like to live life without depression that flares up like clockwork every month before my period

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please spill the Tea

WELL so i was minding my own business thnking we were happy and then he’s like ‘we need to break up’ and my whole ass world came tumbling down and i tried to yeet myself out of the window to go home but hes like ‘no, stay and talk’.

so i did that and the more he talked the more he seemed like he didnt really want to break up with me? like he said he didnt picture himself marrying me, and i was like when have we ever discussed marriage anyway, but he could see himself being happy with me five years from now, but he was breaking up with me as a preemptive measure so that he didnt break my heart later, and that i deserved so much better than him, and he just kept reiterating how great i am for deadass five hours in between him like sobbing harder than i have ever seen any human cry and that means a lot bc i have been thru Some Shit and id never really even seen him cry before.

and then so i go home (i called @liambaeyne on my way home bc she’s a real one) wait no thats a lie i go to my best friends house and recount it to her and then i text my other best friends and then i call my other best friend and now we’re all going to meetu p and have a petty bitch party next weekend (like they’re literally flying in just to spend time with me because me being sad is like a Big Deal to a lot of people) and i half cry all night becuase im sad but i was also so gahdam dehyrdated form all that crying that i was just like peeing crystals

so the next morning i decide to go and get my stuff and i get there and i ask him if i can come in and hes like “of course; i want for you to come in,” and then he’s like “i want for you to stay for a while” and then i ask him more questions about why he broke up with me and we both cried some more and he said he doesn’t know if what he felt about me was love but that it was the best thing he’d ever felt and that our relationship was ‘beautiful’ that i’m the most important person in his life and that no one’s ever made him feel the way i did and he’s never felt the same way about anyone the same way he felt about me and i got all father john misty-eyed and he said he wanted nothing more than for me to stay in his life because i mean so much to him and that he felt so much better the moment i came over today because he likes my presence, so we watched youtube videos for a bit then he took me out to lunch and then we went back to his place and watched not one, not two, but FOUR movies PLUS a tv show. but this was partially because it was snowing for like two of those movies and i didnt want to die and he didnt want me to die, and then when the snow died down i was like ‘i can leave now’ and he was like ‘no, you should stay for a little longer just to be safe’ despite both of us knowing damn well the streets were only gonna get worse because a snow plow in saint louis salting roads??? never

so its like nearing midnight and i fall asleep in the middle of watching true detective and he’s like ‘are you ready to go home’, which i feel like he was only asking because he just moved and doesnt have any furniture and he wouldn’t want to share a bed with me so soon, and im like yeah man ive been tryna leave for ten hours.

so he walks me to my car a block away in the subzero temps and then THOROUGHLY scrapes the ice and snow off my car and tells me not to help him because i “deserve to be treated this way” and we hug again (we hugged a lot that day) (the first couple times were at his request) (actually most of the times were at his request) and then before he leaves he looks at me and says ‘i love you’ and i was like ‘i love you too….in a totally platonic way’ and he just smiled and then i went home 

and then today he’s texting me about how much he likes when i text him 

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Recently whenever I’ve gotten a reading or done a reading for myself it’s suggested that I explore something new… @ universe okay, what do you want me to explore

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so I was gonna be Sophie from hmc for Halloween but my friend told me he’s gonna dress up as Howl and so basically now I don’t have a costume

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so if i kinda like someone but dont really know is there a point in trying to make any sort of move?

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Does anyone else feel like they parent their friends too much? I don’t want to control their lives, I just want them to make responsible choices 

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I wanna watch Merlin but like

do I really wanna watch Merlin?

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How completely fat of me would it be if I had chicken alfredo for the third night in a row?

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