#so many years wasted

[kaarnalaiva]

Dem hips do!

🫶🏻😇

#used to hate my hips🥲 #I didn’t know I kinda look attractive #so many years wasted #lol

[bloodmoonskies]

Another year alone for holidays.. shits lonely man

#I might have only been single for a few months #But it feels like we separated long ago #I'm just an idiot #Lonely #Fucking sucks #Love Halloween #Idk how to enjoy it alone #Idk #Want to see rocky horror #So many years wasted

[delizbin]

:)

#here i am #once again #dudududududu #hayffie #i can not believe I finally managed to do something for these two #good lord #it’s the first of so many I hope #first encounter? #I guess #haymitch abernathy #effie trinket #haymitch x effie #I am wasted #i love her shut up #I feel like a 15 years old kicking her feet and twirling her hair #always on each other’s throats #amazing #loving this for them #the hunger games #hunger games

[onawishingstar]

#lowkey never heard starbucks lovers BUT i did hear stand back wasted for so many years lol! #ALSO I DIDN'T SEE I MADE A TYPO ON IKYWT LMAO DSOKFDSOFKSOPDFKOD

[maintohthakgayibhaishaab]

#frr i wasted so many years #that now I ain't gonna respond to any of guy text #desiblr #aalsi larke #.jpg

[icewindandboringhorror]

... why he sit like this

#in this position his face is extremely 'cartoon cat' shaped.. like the perfectly round cheeks and little #rounded bump of a snout.. big round eyes. etc. stretched over the arm of a chair like a weirdo #cats #It's still Hot Evil Summer time and I have so much to do so am just aimlessly hopping between various projects but not actually #getting anything done. as usual. Also so so so so tired. I almost fell asleep in the middle of the floor like 3 times today lol #Trying to finish some costume photos and also another poll adventure thing. plus I do really want to do a sculpture sometime #I haven't finished one in a while. Hopefully my tiredness is nothing bad. #Maybe I'm anemic again so that's making me tired. Or maybe it's just a Listless phase. not that I'm ever really THAT productive considering #all of the health problems and etc. always holding me back. but still. I'm not usually 'sleep or just stare at a wall literally all day' ty #e unproductive.. at least not for multiple days in a row so. hmm... Sometimes especially in the summer though I will have periods of time #that are listless like that. I am under low level phyiscal stress for months at a time due to summer heat so I guess it makes sense #that would eventually take a toll. I just have SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO!!!!! AAUUGhhh #I also came up with a new idea for a game that is so so cool and I wish I could make it but I have to finish the other one first lol #which I will NEVER do. if I spend all day just sleepy unfocused barely able to do anything #I also really need to sell some clothes and sculptures because I'll probably have to buy a new computer soon so I need money. (plus still #recovering the costs of having to euthanize my other cat.. wehh) There's nothing clearly wrong with it right now but it's getting gradually #slower and there's more weird glitches happening randomly and idk.. just weird things that make me think 'hmm... bad.. possibly.' #ANYWAY... I just have so much to do that I both REALLY want or need to do - so it's perpetually frustrating that I just can't for whatever #reason like. Time is always mving forward. every day I waste is a wasted day. The year is already almost half over. I havent finished #any of the projects I wanted to .. and there's only more and more things to do each day. It's overwhelming and stinky #and thats not even considering having to do all of my tasks also with the background noise of economic inequality. everything increasingly #going into an even scarier political direction. active climate change crisis. pandemic that still exists and is insane to act otherwise. et #etc. HOW am I supposed to solo make two whole games . write 3 book series. finish sculptures. do costumes. make outfits. game videos. make #stable network of social connections. do my little side crafts. take care of myself and cats. pay rent. manage health issues. keep a routin #.try to make some sort of money. go to doctors appointments. handle regular maintenance like cleaning and cooking and self care #and buying new plates when old ones break or etc. make sure to do other things like backup my computer data regularly. do shopping lists. #take care of plants. pursue like 6 different academic interests. do the other side side projects I have for fun (like music or carving avoc #ado pits). eat in a healthy way thats okay for my Special Health Issue diet. exercise so i don't die early. etc. etc. etc. AND all while it #82F in my apartment all the time and I have tiny income and also need to move to another country/climate somehow??? lol...... #ANYWAY.. ..very frustrated today over my chronic Tired Sleepy.. time for Cat Photos - which cure all of life's ailments lol

[whitepain]

thinking about john and arthur getting each other birthday gifts 🤔

arthur getting john that custom made saddle with his initials engraved on it on the horse he had up until it died during the wolf attack... arthur probably spent a fortune on it and was like "since your current saddle looks like it's been through wars..." to play it off like its no big deal and hes doing it out of necessity but he definitely planned it out for a long time and the look on johns face when he handed to him made his heart he thought was long gone and dead go up and throb with something he hasnt felt since mary

john getting arthur a new journal "shucks johnny how'd yknow i needed a new one? my current one is almost full..." his smile then fades into a look of realization and john breaks out into a cold sweat

#morston #id love to hear what u guys think they gave each other :3 #no bc why did they model that saddle for John if their wasnt something more to it.... #we shouldve been able to go on a mission with john to retrieve it... in horseshoe or clemens point... #so many chances for morston missions and they wasted it... take deep breaths youll be okay. No i wont #to me arthur was born in summer and john was born in winter #but we all know the best gift of all is birthday sex #the year john is away and them thinking of each other on their respective birthdays ☹️

[orpheuslament]

on the way back from the gym i saw two teenage girls on scooters in the middle of the road & they kept crossing each other & interlocking their feet & they looked like they were having so much fun i hope they have the best summer of their life

#it did make me fucking miserable bc i lost all my teenage years to crippling mental illness + being closeted so i never got to experience #that feeling of freedom. or at least i cant remember & i cant help but feel like something was stolen from me #i wish i could grab 13 year old dante by the shoulders & tell them to please please please make the most out of it #i know it feels like the world is going to end every single day but theres so many beautiful things to experience #& one day you will be 25 & you will miss yr friends & ask yourself why you wasted so much time #i know its not your fault you were just trying to survive & you did do beautiful things!!! but God #dante.txt

[romanoffsbish]

MCU is good at one thing: Unnecessarily killing women.

#y’all wasted so many characters #brings Jane back just so she can go to valhalla #builds Nat’s arc up to show she’s redeemed in BW just to undo that and kill her in EG #shoots Maria dead in 60 minutes of her first appearance in years #wastes Gamora’s character arc with Quill then gives her to Thanos as a sacrifice #lets Wanda grow in WV just to reverse the growth in MoM and it’s enough that even Lizzie seems over it #let’s Steve settle down with a woman who’d already done that #anti mcu

[noecoded]

If you could have any Asmo/reader fic what would be the things you would want from it? like an ideal fic would contain what tropes or AUS or situations or whatever

uhmm anything wellwritten that characterizes asmo similar to the way i do ! i rlly like character exploration , both more serious stuff & just sillycute...anything where asmo is a little cunning and toxic and also gets railed into oblivion.anything where hes a vampire. ill write a tag essay about the specifics

#xreaders are too unrelatable for me usually .. im aroace and the only relationship dynamics that r rlly interesting to me r likee #toxic or tumultuous...i think in many asmo fics hes just very one note or like not a complex love interest .which is fine because hes like #that in the game but i am especially drawn to fics where the author has their own kind of unique take on it. nuance. etc #it's really interesting to see situations in which asmo kind of reaps the consequences of shitty behavior or struggles with parts of himsel #f he doesnt like. not just in like ohhh im insecure sobsob but like deeprooted issues & patterns thought processes that come with being a d #demon that maybe clash with human morality or ideals...like what if he sees human lives as generally more disposable because hes lived for #so long?? what would a fic be like about him wanting a fling with a human that ends up taking apart their life but to him its just a fun #little romance without any real consequences or commitment?? even if he was obsessed w them professing his undying love etc etc he could ge #t bored and drop it anytime and outlive them by millions of years and forget...& how does a human love an entity like that? how could the r #relationship look anything close to normal ever...anyway i like fics that touch on questions like this theyre kind of rare though #this all being said i def dont think asmo is completely evil💭 nuance #at work so im literally just wasting time by thinking about this rn but this was like the asmotoni dynamic its too interesting to me #asmotoni is like this in my head but on papwr i just draw them fucking witj bunny ears sorry #this doesnt even answer ur question really. if i could write a fic rn it would be like 200k word emo band au that isnt xreader or a romance #fic it would just be asmo beel belphie as humans starting a band and their rise and fall etc ive been thinking abt that plot nonstop

[paellegere]

i got curious about mary's role post-resurrection so i looked at a list of all her appearances in season 12 only to discover that she's only in about half of the episodes. which is surprising because like, where the fuck is she going? where is her character arc going to take her such that she's separated from her children for entire episodes, 33 years in the future with everyone else she's ever known or loved dead?

i'm just eternally fascinated that supernatural is a show about sam and dean, and literally no other character including their own mother is allowed to impede on that. every other character has to be removed at some point from the brotherly unit so as not to infringe on their domination of the narrative. every other character is expendable, unnecessary for the show to function continuously. every other character can go off on their own for several episodes at a time and live a life separate from them. there's no limit to this and no one is allowed to get close enough to sam and dean to negate this reality.

#liveblogging: supernatural #i wouldn't say they commit to this very well because the presence of the recurring cast expands their world and does a disservice to the #themes of isolation and the idea that they only have each other established by early seasons #but the bunker also does a disservice to the premise of it being a road show so like there are plenty of criticisms to make about how #spn has changed over the years #anyway i have critiqued spn on its inability to commit to either a small isolated cast OR a large recurring cast #which is where a lot of the issues i have with many characters stem from #since they're not well developed for the roles the show is trying to force them into #and potential is routinely wasted #anyway. that's just tangential. at the end of the day the show does always bring it back to sam and dean. one unit. #and no one not even other main characters are allowed into that inner circle #made real and evident by their mere presence or absence across episodes #it's just an interesting thing #.txt

[legionofpotatoes]

nimona thoughts! still my top movie of the year so far!!

been thinking about how to frame my thoughts on this gem, and I ultimately arrived at a bit of a pretentious jumping-off point. but honestly, my favorite stories are always the ones that end up demoting the whats, the hows, and sometimes even the whos in service of the whys. it's the hardest question and context to tackle in any story, and it's worth interrogating the most in order to find any true meaning, any connection at all to what's told.

nimona shows exactly why walling yourself away from the "others" isn't good enough. it shows why you have to do the work and see them.

not just that it is dogmatically "the right thing to do". not just depicting what certain systemic injustices are, how they are deployed, and who they are targeted at. but the why. that simplest, purest shape of questioning an injustice dating back to your gentlest time as a child, when you were vulnerable, naive, and truly curious in the best possible faith. the question you would always ask was why.

you are picking up a sword to threaten the unknown. you've been told the whos and whats. you parse it thus. but you don't know the why. you are watching this happen on TV, contextualized, simplified, dramatized. you are connecting the dots. understanding the why.

nimona painstakingly drills down on that why. arduously, achingly digging past the institutions of fear fed by cycles of indoctrination and right down to the core of it. packaged in a simple-to-parse fantasy world built with deft, elegant metaphors and archetypes that immediately fall into place and make sense to a person of any age.

it is animation as a medium and fantasy as a genre both working in concert. a fun and colorful romp that ends on a gentle embrace of reassurance that tells children - both literal and the ones buried deep inside adults - that their first question to the world was always the correct one. because it was the kindest.

#nimona #text #I had such a rough time with the ending and how much it affected me. I knew what her goal would be the moment she headed for the town squar #even before the obvious visual connections. the film carries you alongside her internal state so well that it's almost a magic trick #but really it's just good a-b-c-s of dramatization. not a second is wasted on tertiary noise that's not serving the central metaphor #and you know kids are hyper-attuned to that. they lack the language to conceptualize effective storytelling #but storytelling isn't about peering behind the curtain. it's about receiving whatever is the result of it #and I know deep in my bones that this movie was a warm balm on the hearts of many little ones and that makes me so happy #I'm a 30 year-old adult and it damn near made me weep. anyway! not to promote netflix NOW of all times #but man what a good ass story. you can keep your barbied heimers

[wonder-worker]

I've been thinking about the tragedy of Elizabeth Woodville living to see the death of her family name.

I don't mean her family with her husband, which lived on through her daughter and grandson. I mean her own.

Her sisters died, one by one, many of them after 1485. When Elizabeth died, only Katherine was left, and she would die before the turn of the century as well.

All her brothers died, too. Lewis died in childhood. John was executed. Anthony was murdered. Lionel died suddenly in the peak of Richard's reign, unable to see his niece become queen. Edward perished at war. Richard died in grieving peace. For all the violence and judgement the family endured, it was "an accident of biology" that ended their line: none of the brothers left heirs, and the Woodville name was extinguished. We know the family was aware of this. We know they mourned it, too:

“Buy a bell to be a tenor at Grafton to the bells now there, for a remembrance of the last of my blood.”

Elizabeth lived through the deposition and death of her young sons, and lived to see the end of her own family name. It must have been such a haunting loss, on both sides.

#(the quote is by Richard Woodville in his deathbed will; he was the last of the Woodville brothers to die) #elizabeth woodville #woodvilles #my post #to be clear I am not arguing that the death of an English gentry family name is some kind of giant tragedy (it absolutely the fuck is not) #I'm trying to put it into perspective with regards to what Elizabeth may have felt because we know her family DID feel this way #writing this kinda reminded me of how I am just not fond at all about the way Elizabeth's experiences in 1483-85 are written about #and the way lots so many of the unprecedentedly horrifying aspects are overlooked or treated so casually: #the seizure and murder of two MINOR sons and the illegal execution of another; #her sheer vulnerability in every way compared to all her queenly predecessors; how she was harassed by 'dire threats' for months; #how she had 5 very young daughters with her to look after at the time (Bridget and Katherine were literally 3 and 4 years old); #how unprecedented Richard's treatment of her was: EW was the first queen of england to be officially declared an adulteress; #and the first and ONLY queen to be officially accused of witchcraft #(Joan of Navarre was accused of her treason; she was never explicitly accused of witchcraft on an official level like EW was) #the first crowned queen of england to have her marriage annulled; and the first queen to have her children officially bastardized #what former queens endured through rumors* were turned into horrifying realities for her. #(I'm not trying to downplay the nightmare of that but this was fundamentally on a different level altogether) #nor did Elizabeth get a trial or appeal to the church. like I cannot emphasize this enough: this was not normal for queens #and not normal for depositions. ultimately what Richard did *was* unprecedented #and of course let's not forget that Elizabeth had literally just been unexpectedly widowed like 20 days before everything happened #I really don't feel like any of this is emphasized as much as it should be? #apart from the horrifying death of her sons - but most modern books never call it murder they just write that they 'disappeared' #and emphasize that ACTUALLY we don't know what happened to them (this includes Arlene Okerlund) #rather than allowing her to have that grief (at the very least) #more time is spent dealing with accusations that she was a heartless bitch or inconsistent intriguer for making a deal with Richard instead #it also feels like a waste because there's a lot that can be analyzed about queenship and R3's usurpation if this is ever explored properly #anyway - it's kinda sad that even after Henry won and her daughter became queen EW didn't really get a break #her family kept dying one by one and the Woodville name was extinguished. and she lived to see it #it's kinda heartbreaking - it was such a dramatic rise and such a slow haunting fall #makes for a great story tho

[kindaeccentric]

feeling constantly tired will make you google shit like 'can chronically ill people become writers', 'chronically exhausted film director' 'adhd and work in media'

#i feel like such a failure #i wasted so many years just trying to survive through bullying through a depressive episode through physical illness #and through it all I never had money either #It's whining hours sorry #and I'm only getting older I can't afford to waste more time on schools on other degrees with no guarantee of success #i can't focus my memory is a sieve #if only i wasn't so tired all the time i would stand a chance but. I don't #if only i was a nepo baby. instead I'm a nobody from nowhere #i have nobody that can help me but myself and myself is barely able to live one day at a time #i can try to push myself but there is no direction to push towards #I'm the worst loser in the world

[theflagscene]

So we know Mix has never paired in a BL with anyone besides Earth, they’ve known each other for years, even before Mix started acting. So it’s obvious that they’re very comfortable with one another and Earth is the only man he’s ever properly kissed, (Phuwin in FUTS doesn’t count, that wasn’t a kiss, it was purposely filmed stilted and awkward with dead fish lips for the scene) so it’ll be interesting to see if First’s insane chemistry with literally everyone will translate to playing a romantic partner with Mix well. I really want to see how well Mix is able to sell it, are they going to kiss? Is it going to be awkward? First has never come off as anything but completely genuine when playing a romantic partner - no matter the gender of his scene partner - in all of his roles. Mix on the other hand has never played romance opposite anyone besides Earth, he was a ‘romantic interest’ in Fish Upon The Sky for Phuwin’s character, and their dead fish kiss was supposed to be weird and awkward because it was all in the character of Pi’s drunken mind. But in Moonlight Chicken, Wen and Alan are in a long term committed relationship, they (seem to) live together, they’re clearly supposed to be close and comfortable with one another until Wen starts cheating with Jim. So I am admittedly very curious if First was able to get Mix comfortable enough with him to the point that they genuinely seem like a couple on screen 🤔

#moonlight chicken #mix sahaphap #first kanaphan #earthmix #firstmix #wenalan #jimwen #I don’t wanna wait until February for this series to come out! #I have so many thoughts and questions already #I’m gonna waste away before it comes out!!! #it’s been 84 years #😫😫😫

[thatscarletflycatcher]

And the griefs keep coming and they won't stop coming...

#nothing life and death now #but administration shenanigans about teachers #and it infuriates me #and it makes me deeply sad because it's devaluing what took me many sleepless nights #many tears and humiliations to achieve #So I feel the emptiness of thinking I wasted years of my life on nothing #the anger at the people doing this to us #the sadness about a profession I loved and the students #and it's a lot