#so perfectly encapsulated by Euphoria

[astralnymphh]

Okay I have this little thought of fucking ellie in lotus position and I literally can’t get it out of my head

Sorry if this is weird I just feel like you could do it justice if you’re comfortable😭

omgg lotus position. that's like.. perfect for ellie cause she loves you straddling her and boobs.. and grabbing handfuls of ass meat. I'll do a little blurb on this but honestly might incorporate this position in a future fic. this feels a bit lazy but i swear im just saving my brain as i start saccharine saturations 2. MDNI ౨ৎ

lotus position with ellie ౨ৎ

let me paint the perspective on this blank canvas. the girl before you, ruby–eared as the budding roses of spring and swamping her sights in you, intoxication, a budding lust to be. the absolute hormone spurts you get whenever ellie drags you atop her lap is utterly intoxicating, utterly. you, sitting vis–à–vis. both of you undertaking the nude. her knees, bent to a perfect splay that opens a little seat just for you, a fleshy, cushiony, linen bedsheet crater. fair skin awash in tawny light, courtesy of the floor lamp abutting to the bed. a light that also reflects a shimmer string off the solid base of her strap, diagonally rested between those manspread legs. chartreuse green encapsulated in a bedroom–eye droopy–lid gaze surrounded by reeds of her deep amber esque lashes curving so softly from her puffy waterlines. an expression that says 'come sit on my lap pretty girl.' while she loiters one of those lusty hands to pose and dab her thigh gently– rippling the tight skin barely and croaking a smoky whisper, "c'mon baby, m' all ready for you now." as her lip corners tug a toothy smirk, folding the bottom lip under to bite. it coils back out, so pliantly, she lures you in tender.

ellie would fuck you so good in lotus. maddenly so, spires of her knobby digits grapple and hook on your ass, soothing softness leaven as milk bread. hairs on her arms, bitsy and tickle inducing, lie plumb from your thighs to your hips and are clasped in the soft layer of elasticity. she kneads your butt like malleable dough and spreads you wide on her pumping cock, lubricous laces lashing from your stuffed slit. the pressure exuded in her fingertips line your ass so perfectly to her roll of hip, she can fuck up into your cunt just right. in this angle, she deepens within you, and you take her unconditionally. plop, plop, palp, the slickening of cum glazes your underside thoroughly and crafts a wet slap whenever her dense hips rut into your cushy pussy lips. in your blurred numbness she finds a mania in seeing you all dog–panting and white–eyed, craning close and curling those sun–baked lips flush on your breast, "fuck that pussy back on me, mhmm, good girl.." brushing skin with her muffled coax. you bounce your bottom in sync with hers, creating a on beat rhythm, but in return her cock bottoms out deeper inside to the point of bulging a knob in your belly. on an ellie's perspective note, she fucking loves suckling upon your tender, risen nipples during sex, so this position basically emboldened her to put those eager lips to use. her gob caves an 'o' shape over your nipple and excitedly flicks her textured tongue over the nub, ever the more inflaming your pussy with euphoria. you card knuckles in her tuft of auburn hair, yanking a grip of locks to which ellie gives your nipple a teensy bite, getting you to yelp. ugh, can't you just visualize that view? a thin gap between your humping bodies, skin clumping and swelling, her perky boobs jiggling with the movements produced, peak of her russet pubes browsing over the harness base– slap! a red sting of fury nips you in the buttcheek, literally. ellie can't get enough of your rump, popping off your breast a moment and slanting her body aside to catch a glimpse of it, freak, indulging another slap. anyways, holding your hips captive to where she needs them, she pipes all the delectable cream she can out of you, grazing that bumpy vein shaft along your ribbed walls with a passion to spite 'unpassions', she coagulates a burning knot inside you, haste without chaste. girl will commit ungodly things to prove how helpless to climax you are on her thickset dick, popping her mouth off your tit to provoke in words of hypocrisy, "feels so good, huh? going dumb on my cock? yeahh? haha, god, can't even see your eyes, fuck." i claim hypocrisy, because we all know damn well with our combined minds that this girl gets dumb on your pussy, folding up her lips to contain the slobber threatening to make her look pussydrunk.

and she is most definetely pussydrunk, moreso in this position, climbing up to a high real fast. chromatically, her moan rises, "uhhhhhhh, yeahahhaaa.. ohh fuck."

how she looks cumming in this position? electrifying. her fawn freckled cheeks overcast in a flush of coral pink, gaping her lips wide and scrunching skin in all the right areas. the chafing pleasure tweaking her clit makes for a good fucking orgasm. her lids embracing the reflex of scantly shutting and gazing up at you, the green in her eyes somehow more vibrant and her pupils blown to a new moon. she just whines a grunty, "hahhh– mhhh, mhhh, yeessss." in a warble while twitching her last final blows against your beaten cervix, cockhead mashing that gummy donut. scarred as your shoulderblades take the toll ten clawing nails can bestow, her fingers whiten away the pigment with the strength issued into your flesh. her own pussy convulses and gathers up a bit of milky cum to streamline in strings along her perineum, dripping like dew onto the bed. you're ways from comparable, though, spraying your clear orgasm all over her. she'll praise you through her tale of moans, groaning, "uhhh yeah, get that cock all filthy– filthy, filthy, filthhh– fuuckkkk.." strands of her hair stick in an untidy manner beyond her hairline, shadowing that gloss of sweat narrowly. then, she dwindles down to a smile, a smile to bury. burying kisses in your sternum, she peppers up and up with a sudden awash of elation walking hand–in–hand with exhaustion. shaky nubs of her fingertips press and drag sweaty over the blushed marks given in her high, almost writing an apology to the poor scratches. looser skin of your back bulges and ribs between her waxy digits, cooling with a pasty ache. the weeping of pores after sex was no joke, no lie. and ellie intended to lick every puny dollop of it from your body. "l'mme clean you up.." she mumbles droney as a meadow bee barming your ears with a measly melody, voice muted in your neck. you reply, fumbly out of breath, "oh, a bath? i could really use a–" the chambré stamp of her tongue unfurls blunt to your neck, nudging up a spit trail along the skin. by clean you up, she just means lick you like a dog. i personally live for ellie doing that. you bumble, "ellie?" and she just garbles back, lips obviously occupied, "let me, mhh, clean you up.." and slipping a gritty chuckle in the depths of her throat, shrugging her shoulders a bit.

don't even get me started on ellie licking you up and down after sex.

#ellie williams #⤹𓍢ִ໋aestras asks #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams smut #ellie tlou #ellie x reader #lesbian #sapphic #ellie williams x fem!reader #ellie williams fic #ellie williams concept #ellie williams fanfic #ellie williams fanfiction #ellie williams x you #ellie x fem reader #ellie x you #ellie x y/n #ellie williams x reader smut #ellie smut #ellie the last of us #ellie williams blurb #ellie williams drabble #ellie williams headcanons #ellie headcanons

[i-like-this-song-because]

Ok yall I know I've been super quiet in this blog, life's been shit. But! Spotify Wrapped is out!!! So:

Kinda hate that I can't share that apparently I listened to 83 different genres this year

This is extremely amusing to me. I have never heard of this town in my life.

I don't really know how to describe how much this song means to me. I am the hell my mother raised and she really did try but I will never ever be who they want me to be

The first 4 really are about the coinciding and dueling aspects of the integral need to escape the life I'm in and the inability to leave these poisoned memories behind. The last one is just nice. I want someone to love so deeply that I'd cover a murder up for them.

Gotta say I'm kinda surprised it's not more. Honestly the only time I'm not listening to music is at a doctor’s appointment. I do listen to music in the shower but it's through my parents' Alexa system so that cuts time out of my spotify. Fr spotify should just give me premium for free bc I use it so much

Not surprised even remotely, can't believe Spotify just dropped on me that apparently I've listened to 1,715 artists this year and I can't even show you

A little surprised, I did listen to Merle like exclusively in April but I've listened to a shit ton since then

This one did surprise me. I didn't realize I even listened to Harry that much bc I listened to him way less than last year

Nope not surprised. Homeward Bound encapsulates my tumultuous emotions perfectly and his songs are like peak gender euphoria to sing

Very surprised, again. I probably haven't listened to them more than once since January. Just opened up the new album today bc the wrapped reminded me they exist

[paeonie-s]

 csm first half op + eds ranking hehe

op 1: KICK BACK tbh wasnt a massive fan of the song when i came out but its grown on me w the full context & lyrics it slayed idc NOW THE VISUALS ... filled me w euphoria when i first saw it have (re)watched half the fucking movies referenced ONLY BC MIDTERMS WAS BEATING MY ASS .. so creative and fun and dynamic and hectic as fuck the timing and directing on this is like incomprehensibly good. its funny asf and has such beautiful lively enviornments and lighting and such a cohesive feel despite how batshit everything is NO ONE HAS TALKED ABT THE SHOT W THE MOUNTAINS AND SKY AND THE BULLETS. AM I THE ONLY OEN WHOSE INSANE ABT THAT ONE. so so beautiful literally a look into the minds of fujimoto and the ani staff and a gift upon this earth. 10/10

ed 1: SUCH A GOOD SONG !!!!!!! fit super well w the end of the first ep & is just genuinely such a banger. credits roll was smart for the airing of the actual ep, helped me take in the whole ep and appreciate the best parts of it. the mv released on mappas channel is rly solid considering it just recycled scenes from the actual ep !! love first half of the vid + the zoom in on pochitas tail the most ofc !! 6/10 bc the song is a banger but its just no as obsessable bc of the lack of og visuals :(

ed 2: GORGEOUSSS VISUALS tho it doesn’t feel v well aligned w the tone of csm BUT STILL !!!! song aligns super well w the visuals atleast & i love love the look of the animation, the environments especially are so beautiful 😭 i think the denji falling into the sky scene were especially well timed w the music and made me v emo about his character. esp love the hayakawa fam focus and how power is literally the one who PULLS HIM BACK DOWN .. beloveds 7.5/10 ok i like it picasso

ed 3: FAVE SONG its so good. so much to say abt this one rapid change of scene linework shading color sfx is fucking insane each unique aes makes me physically ill its so good. so gripping the TRANSITION from makima goddess to hayakawa fam W THE DOOR. AND THE TRAUMA. fave part is the hayakawa family shots towards the end that combined w the lyrics perfectly encapsulates what csm is thematically to me. goretastic insanity used as a means of making the intensely human obviously doomed connections at the heart of the story that much more impactful. fully embraces the best parts of csm and rips my heart out all in the course of 90 seconds 10/10 idc idc

ed 4: POWAAA !!!! song is such a fucking banger i mean it this shit has had me dancing for weeks BUT THE VISUALS .... so dynamic and insane love how they played dress up w her and also made sure the audience knew she was a lil freak. theres so much to love and appreciate about the visuals and how fucking sick the movements are and the colors but truly this ones just vibes. 9/10

ed 5: fs my FAVE of all the ones currently out (i think this is the most popular opinion lmao) but the combination of the frantic, very dense visuals and a rly cool fast paced song scratched smth in my brain. so much inspiration to dig through and BEAUTIFUL use of colors, lighting, and effects animation omg. Those shots of himeno are stapled on the inside of my eyelids i love them. so many art references w/ a great selection to specifically represent the chaos of the eternity devil love the use of optical illusions (ONCE AGAIN W THE LIGHTING !!!) and use of timing to create a jarring effect (horses running in slo mo (same w some shots of the chs) immediately being contrasted w rapid movement/blinking of eyes, fireworks, shots of the sky w the clouds racing across) as well as the rapid changing of one shot to another is so insane. another detail i love is that it has a almost collage like look bc each background/piece of ch or effects animation has dif linework, uses dif brushes, as well very unique lighting and shading. also so so much to dissect w how it foreshadows later events (if u start looking there are like. 4 dif instances of guns in this bitch holy fuck) and the themes of the work as a whole but i have classes a life etc that will have to wait til winter break. so genuinely obsessed w this one it was literally the one that convinced me (most obnoxious csm fan) that mappa knows exactly what theyre doing and are likely making the actual anime the way they are as a deliberate commitment to make it even more insane later down the line. i am a drastic rapid tonal shifts enjoyer i love this ed 10/10 its my gf

ed 6: not a massive fan of the visuals or the song for this one :( the instrumental of the song felt kinda jarring after the sequence of denji jumping into the eternity devils mouth, i was def expecting a dif kind of vibe. the visuals were cool, but i don't feel like the static characters were used particularly well. some of the transitions and “camera” movements also rly didn't feel very well suited to the cuts they were in. my fave part was the settings and backgrounds, especially the textures and the way the movement “through” the bgs were done, tho the 5th ed had a very similar concept and i think executed it better. kind of disappointing with how much i enjoyed the prev eds, but it was still enjoyable to watch and analyze how they constructed the visuals. 4/10 bc i respect what they were trying to do i just dont think they had the time to develop a unique vision

#chainsaw man #csm #🌸.txt #u might be thing 'mel. are u insane?' yes now listen to my thoughts boy #love kick back 200 mil centimeter long blades and in the back room w my whole heart. i do not take criticism

[marvellouspinecone]

10 and 12 for pride asks :D

I realize this ask is exactly seven hundred years old but i've just noticed it😭 so sorry about that. I had to go dig through my dash to find the post and all that

10. Something that gives you gender euphoria (whether you're cis or trans):

Wearing a long ass skirt and tall boots and walking somewhere purposefully makes me feel like Anne Lister running errands, and that's when i'm at my coolest and most powerful. Close second is wearing my leather jacket so i can channel Nine or Dean Winchester or something (my two gender inspirations as a cis woman lmao)

12. Name some queer artists/bands or songs you like most:

I have to go with t.A.T.u. even though they are not actually queer (the queerbaiting was wild on that one). I especially love their song Not Gonna Get Us, bc it just so perfectly encapsulates the experience of growing up queer in a homophobic country. No one understands (gets) you, so you want to run away, so far and fast that they don't catch (get) you. So when you have someone with you who is like you the isolation from the rest of society is both a curse and a blessing. Makes my brain go static. This is my anthem fr

Thank you for the ask! Sorry for abandoning it for like centuries? Happy pride!

[mod2amaryllis]

i know everyone is understandably getting gender euphoria from being Seen by your post, but i also want to shout out that you mentioning being ace but highly sex favorable as it not generally occuring to you naturally but when you decide to think about it it's nice just gave me the biggest 'holy shit that's me that's EXACTLY IT' and i've never been able to articulate my aceness in a satisfying way until that so thank you, you just single-handedly beat up my imposter syndrome

wagh YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY ouh that makes me so happy!! :')

i get the imposter syndrome dilemma when it comes to calling yourself ace. i didn't use it for the longest time because I've always really enjoyed sex, but also always felt like my libido and thought process surrounding sex was very different from most people i knew, and very very VERY fucking different from the impression american pop culture gave me.

i felt a lot better about it once i realized like..... there's no label that will ever encapsulate the complex experience of Being Me, BUT. what labels, when said to another person, give the most accurate impression? telling someone I'm bi and ace might not feel perfectly accurate to Me, but it's like,, a synopsis lol. it gives more information than you'd get if all you knew was i present like a woman 99% of the time, am married to a man, and we do have sex. the labels offer more immediate complexity

#like i don't think too hard about this stuff but also i think about it sooooooo hard yknow? #m2a #m2answers #this is also why i think larger umbrella terms are so important #it means that even with all our differing complexities we're still members of the same community #breaking down the language more and more and more to the microscopic specificities is isolating. it's not helpful.

[mademoiselle-red]

8 Shows Tag Game

RULES - List eight shows for your followers to get to know you better.

Thanks to @argyleheir for tagging me!

Doctor Who (the 2005 reboot)

The 10th, 11th, and 12th doctor eras are my favorite seasons to rewatch. Blink, Silence in the Library, and The Eleventh Hour are my favorite episodes.

Honorary mention: Torchwood: Children of Earth. It was amazing and utterly devastating. A Doctor Who spin-off.

This is Going to Hurt

This miniseries starring Ben Whishaw about a obgyn doctor perfectly encapsulates the kind of humor I enjoy.

Honorary mention: A Very English Scandal. Written by Russel T Davis (Doctor Who show-runner of the 9th and 10th Doctor eras). Staring Ben Whishaw and Hugh Grant. A hilarious and fascinating 3 episode miniseries.

Derry Girls

Teenagers acting like real teenagers, in 1990s Northern Ireland, just living their ordinary lives amidst sectarian conflict and military occupation. The teen drama feels so realistic because it takes place in such a specific time (early 90s) and place (Derry) and focuses on specific people (Irish Catholic teenagers), in contrast to teen shows like Sex Education or Euphoria that seem to take place in near-present-day, any-town. Despite the specificity of the story, Derry Girls is probably the most relatable teen show I’ve ever seen. The focus on friendships, school, family, community, and tentative explorations of love and identity were much more relatable than teen shows that focus on sex, drugs, toxic families, and high stakes conflicts. Like in Derry Girls, my teenage years were largely sheltered from the conflicts of the adult world, and the most high stake thing I ever did was apply to university. But also like Derry Girls, I was gradually becoming aware of adult problems (interpersonal, financial, political) and developing my opinions on them. I find it very poignant that Derry Girls begins the first episode with our protagonist arguing with her mother over wearing a jean jacket instead of her school uniform because she’s a teenager now, and “teenagers have rights”, and ends the final episode of the final season with the protagonist exercising her right to vote in a referendum ratifying the Good Friday Agreement.

Ultimate Note

A Chinese series adapting Books 4 and 5 of the Grave Robbers’ Chronicles novels by Nanpai Sanshu. I adore the novels and this is, in my opinion, the only decent screen adaptation. There have been dozens of cinematic and tv adaptations and they have all been rather terrible for some inexplicable reason.

Band of Brothers

Currently obsessed this. A miniseries about a company of American paratroopers on the western front in World War Two. The main character, Dick Winters, is my blorbo ❤️❤️❤️

What Did You Eat Yesterday

A Japanese miniseries about a gay couple and their shared delight in the food they eat. Each episode contains a storyline centered around our protagonists finding joy in an ordinary culinary experience, featuring extended cooking montages, detailed descriptions of food while cooking and eating, and plenty of humor and social commentary.

Hannibal

I watch it while cooking and eating. I’m in the fandom for the food porn.

The Great British Bake-Off

I only re-watch the early seasons, when Mary Berry was still one of the judges. This show inspired me to attempt Victoria Sponge Cakes and Meat Pies.

#we both like Hannibal and The Great British Bake Off! #tv show recs

[nctzenkane]

Nctzen Kane presents... the top 10 Kpop Songs of 2022!!!

This year was insanely good musically, so it was really difficult to narrow it down to just ten fantastic songs.  If your fave didn’t end up here... then make your own list, what do you think this is?

Anyway, without further dudes...

NUMBER TEN: FOREVER 1- GIRL’S GENERATION

 This song feels like a wish come true. It’s not the most complex or interesting song out there, but it deserves its spot on this list just for the fact that we got a full group comeback from the one and only SNSD in the year of the goddess Hylia 2022.  I love the vibes of it, it puts me in a great mood, and that’s enough for it to be on here

 NUMBER NINE: VENOM- STRAY KIDS

 All I need to say to justify this one is… pewpewpew

 But seriously, this song’s beat is so SKZ that it’s INSANE. Like disgustingly addictive, springy sound that perfectly encapsulates the feel of a spider’s legs. It’s so fucking *chef’s kiss*. Of all the songs on the Oddinary album, this one really tickles my brain just the right way. However, there is one other song on the album that works just a tiny bit better…

 NUMBER EIGHT: MANIAC- STRAY KIDS

 And that’s Maniac.  All the disparate pieces of this song coalesce in a way that is just so perfect. I’ve always loved the way SKZ utilizes Felix’s unique voice, and the chorus of Maniac is the perfect example of that. It’s an absolute bop, and the superior track on an album with no skips

 NUMBER SEVEN: OPENING SEQUENCE- TXT

 I love TXT. I love everything about them so much. But what I didn’t love, was Good Boy Gone Bad. It pained me to admit that when the track dropped, so imagine my delight when I started listening to the album and I heard this absolute gem.  I love the atmosphere of this song so much, and TXT is incredibly skilled at capturing feelings of discomfort and desolation in their music, and those feelings fit the lyrical content perfectly

 NUMBER SIX: I HATE YOU- WOODZ

 The pop punk trend in kpop is one of the best things to happen to the genre in years, and in my opinion, there’s no one better suited to capture it than Woodz.  In the past I’ve described Woodz as something of a musical chameleon; able to tackle any genre and absolutely kill it.  He captures the carefree “fuck you” vibes of early 2000s pop punk effortlessly, and I’d love to hear more of this sound from him in the future

 NUMBER FIVE: 28 REASONS- SEULGI

 Seulgi as a dark, sensual, domineering badass? Yes. Very yes.

 Jokes aside, Seulgi absolutely murdered this concept both visually and musically.  I’m not sure if it was meant to be a throwback, but it definitely reminds me of something Aaliyah would’ve released in the late 90s. This was a strong solo debut for one of kpop’s most high profile aces, and I really can’t wait to see what she’ll do next

  NUMBER FOUR: CYBERPUNK- ATEEZ

 This song is why I love ATEEZ as much as I do. This shit hits you like a wall of unstoppable sound the moment the chorus kicks off, and it’s the type of sonic euphoria that I’ve been desperately missing with 4th gen groups. It’s no secret that this generation has pivoted more towards choreography and elaborate concepts, and away from killer vocals like 2nd and 3rd gen.  That’s not necessarily a bad thing mind you, but ATEEZ proves why having killer vocals is such an asset.  I love every second of this one start to finish, and uh… let’s just say those concert stages were iconic *wink wink*

 NUMBER THREE: TIME LAPSE- NCT 127

 I mean it when I say that the 2 Baddies album might be NCT 127’s best one yet.  Almost every song is phenomenal, but none more so than Time Lapse.  I love the attention to detail; the computerized/digitized sounds at the beginning, and the old Hollywood style music sting at the end really tie in well with the concept of ‘time’, and the fucking CHORUS. Every czennie has been bumping “can we fix it?!” for MONTHS.  It was hard for me to pick a single song from this album, but after some thought, I knew it just had to be this one

 NUMBER TWO: BEGIN- ONLYONEOF’S YOOJUNG

 OnlyOneOf’s “UndergrOund IdOl” project has been one of the best things to ever happen in the history of kpop.  What really endears me to it is not just its unflinching depictions of explicit queerness (no teasing or implication here) but also the fact that the music is ACTUALLY GOOD.  Not gonna say any names (not looking to insult people here) but we shouldn’t have to sacrifice musical quality just to have some queer rep in the industry.  Of all the releases so far though, I think the one that kicked it off is still the best.  There’s just something magical about Begin; I’m not sure if its his delivery of the lyrics, the mellow energy of the track that builds to a satisfying climax, or just the relatability of the single line “hate this city” as a queer person.  Whatever it is makes Begin such a perfect song, and so far its yet to be topped by the rest of the series in my opinion

 HONORABLE MENTIONS (IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER)

 -The rest of the UndergrOund IdOl series (Be Mine, Be Free, Because, and Beat)- OnlyOneOf

-Gold Rush- NCT 127

-Birthday- Ten

-Limbo- Jun

-Pose- Kino

-Gasoline- Key

-Hair Cut- Xdinary Heroes

-Taste- Stray Kids Danceracha

-3racha- Stray Kids 3racha

 NUMBER ONE: STRAWBERRY CAKE- XDINARY HEROES

 Yeah, if you know me, this is no surprise.  I’ve been a Villain since Happy Death Day, and this band just keeps getting better and better with every release.  I love their unique sound and their insane vocals are truly showcased on this track. The moment I heard this one, I knew it was gonna be my number one song of the year and as the months passed, nothing quite managed to dethrone it.  I can not fucking wait to see how the guys evolve as time goes on

#xdinary heroes #onlyoneof #NCT 127 #girl's generation #seulgi #red velvet #ateez #TXT #stray kids #Woodz

[heyitsphoenixx]

hey bestie i got your he/they pronouns post on my dash and i just wanna say thank you for making it because it made me realize that it perfectly encapsulates exactly how i feel about my gender. i have some massive gender euphoria from it now :) embracing femininity is so so important and the recent gerardisms and anecdotes about him on here have been crucial in helping me realize that :) so thank you again <3

this means the world to me. I’m so so glad my ramblings could help you in any way and I feel just as happy about all the recent gerardisms too. thank you so much for sharing.

[vawsculturecorner]

My Musical 2023: Musings by a girl who can't stop getting high and tweeting

PART 2: Seriously are you fucking stupid this year was great for music.

Relentless Replays:

These albums could have made the all-star list because I played them enough for it. Consider these projects as taking the silver medal on the podium; albums absolutely worth listening to and if I could chuck everything into the all-star list, I would. Alas, artificial limitations.

Antarctica - Bayang (tha Bushranger) Not content to leave 2023 without spoiling his fans, Bayang makes his catchiest, most optimistic project yet. "GANGA" is my favourite song he's released period and it sits aside a bevy of songs where you can hear how much fun went into it. Give it a bit of time to process (it was a December release after all) and this could easily be my favourite Bayang project and definitely the one that will get the most playtime because of how accessible it is.

I Was Mature For My Age But I Was Still A Child - Grouptherapy Do you also miss BH because they were formative to your growth as a person and all the allegations coming out against them have you down? If so boy howdy do I have the album for you! IWMFMA reels you in by reminding you of the Saturation era (in particular the first instalment) but doubles down on the fundamentals, swapping DIY coarseness for polished technical prowess. Bombastic, chock full of personality and incredibly versatile, there is a track for every person and every occasion here.

Beloved! Paradise! Jazz!? - McKinley Dixon Mckinley Dixon made For My Mama and Everyone Who Looks Like Her, so I should not have been caught as off-guard as I was when this project was released. And yet, the first time I heard this album I was already convinced it was practically flawless. In its brevity, BPJ doesn’t skip a single beat nor miss a lick of detailing and polish, as each song feels vibrant and full of the essence of living.

April Mixtape 3 - Snow Strippers I have never been an EDM girly, but this album makes me want to go to raves, drop a tab and just space out for hours. Endlessly replayable with beautiful vocals soaked in distinct internet electronics, this album will make even the most intense introverts want to take caps and stare at glow sticks for a night. The Aux - Blockhead A cavalcade of creatively assembled instrumentals featuring a highlight reel of the underground hip-hop elite. Blockhead casually reminds you why he is one of the best producers working right now. 

Shapeless - Daine I read a lot of think pieces about the death knell of hyperpop in 2023 but with releases like Shapeless, I think people are opting to be wilfully deaf. Daine puts their whole chest into every hook on this album with beats that flutter with technological clangs and heaves. Exhilarating hyperpop euphoria Quaranta - Danny Brown Danny Brown returns with an album that has supposedly been finished for a few years - telling, considering that the emotional poignance of the album feels very specific to a point in time. Fantastic and highly consistent, it is a much more mellow album for Danny but no less quality than what we have come to expect. Guts - Olivia Rodrigo You motherfuckers tried to write this girl off as making teeny-bop music and I won't forgive you for it. Olivia Rodrigo is one of the most promising pure-pop artists of this generation. She says it on the opener - she knows her age, acts like it, and makes music that perfectly encapsulates it to boot. Sundial - Noname Lmao im sorry fuck Fantano, Noname is one the most important artists of the current day and Sundial is a testament to both her intellect and spirit, with words that prick the conscious like spears. I genuinely do not have the words to describe the beauty of a track like gospel?, nor her second verse on "balloons" which tactfully breaks down the voyeurism of black art. You almost have a responsibility to sit with this album properly.

Bite-sized Brilliance

2023 was the year of the EP and I'm so glad because they are great introductory pieces to artists or just compact packages of enjoyment.

Violet, Zion Garcia, Darling - LITERALLY EVERY FULL CIRCLE RELEASE For my coldest take so far, 2023 was the year of Full Circle. With growing attention on Western Sydney, this clique absolutely spearheaded it. Every single release from every single artist was fantastic and at least one song off each made my year favs. (there is another project that Im gonna mention in my all-star list hehe). If you want grungey RNB with vocals that smother in sensuality, listen to Dylan Atlantis. If you want creative Jazzy hip-hop from one of the brightest upcoming rappers in Aus, Zion Garcia. If you want a digital genre collage dedicated to the sounds of the city, FRIDAY* is your man. Anticipating everything this group does for the foreseeable future. GUILD I - SEVY x GRASPS x BAYANG x UNCLE KAL They really got Kal rapping again - with tracks that are this undeniably infectious, I can see how! Feel-good fun for late-night activities Another Triumph of Ghetto Engineering - Open Mike Eagle and Lilac Diesel - R.A.P FERREIRA A couple of short but sweet releases by two underground hip-hop legends that should keep fans satiated until their next major releases. Reflections on the Water, ONE7OVE, Michelangelo - Gian Santorno One of the most promising discoveries I made this year, Gian raps on the perfect instrumentals to suit their vinyl-crackle rapping and the unashamed self-dissection of themself is enthralling.

The Singles!

There were a lot of good single tracks this year! Here they are below! Yes, it's a tidal playlist - if you actually want to download it I might port it to Spotify but we really gotta stop using Spotify gang it's a 2024 out.

VAWS 2023 TOP PICKS The bolded ones are my all-stars for 2023 Again - Snow Stripers Babylon by Bus - hot take, its the best song on the standard version of Maps Be Like U - Sidney Phillip Among many of Sidney’s strengths is her ability to be so fucking endearing jesus fucking christ this song is so cute Black Knight Croatia - Too Birdz Blocked call - ARMAND HAMMER MY HEART PUMP KETAMINE Blood on my grails - Goyard Ibn Said

Bring Wet Cunt - Zheani bugging! - brakence Burn City Linkup (Hell) Butterflies- Skrillex, Four Tet, Fred Again CARDIO - 1300, SOLLYY Celibate - Danny Brown featuring MIKE The Cellar Dwellas Knew - Blockhead featuring Quelle Chris Dang - Caroline Polachek Mother made a beautiful tropical album and said hey you want some of that PC music shit too? DELRESTO (Echoes) - Travis Scott x Beyonce Dexamphetamine - BAYANG x NERDIE Double Trio - By Storm Dying in the City  - FRIDAY*  Technologic disassociation and the city’s chaotic casing as you miss your last bus out for the night ealthystay - lil ket featuring Sidney Phillips A certified hood classic banger. SELLING PGR BUT IM SMOKING MEDS ON MY OWN

Effy - Sidney Phillips I really do be Effy, I really do be Cassie.  Eternally Hateful/Young Drunk Drivers - Kirin J Callinan I could not pick because both of these songs are weirdo pop bangers and I love him for it. Fried Ice Cream - Wiki and Tony Seltzer featuring ZelooperZ GANGA - Bayang (tha bushranger) featuring LIL PIXIE I fucking love Bayang (tha bushranger) - BOYS BE YELLING GANG BUT STILL TOO BITCH TO HANG WITH GANGAS GIMMIE UR LOVE - GUILD God Loves You - Danny Brown x JPEGMAFIA The Gods Must be Crazy - ARMAND HAMMER El-p must be crazy for this beat YOU FEEL ME

Got Me Started - Troye Sivan Fantano made me mad when he said this was a cheap interpolation it's brilliant and much like the other singles from this album, quintessential summer hits for your inner gay  gospel? - Noname featuring $ilkmoney and billy woods Half-Life - Slauson Malone Homeostasis - Gian Santorno He left Nothing for the Swim Back - SKECH185 x Jeff Markey The first single I heard this year, I told you then that nothing was going to top this. Cataclysm rap for a dying century.  how i'm feeling - grouptherapy. Pretty good hbu I Believe - Caroline Polachek Rest in peace SOPHIE - I love you, thank you. I Know? - Travis Scott I'VE BEEN YOUNG - George Clanton Lethal - Frost Children Living Curfew - Aesop Rock featuring billy woods An all-star pairing with a witchy, woozy and lingering fear that tiptoes through the instrumental. Those haunting background vocals make me forget I'm even listening to a song. One of my favourite songs by both artists.  Love is Embarrassing - Olivia Rodrigo She's right you know. What's not embarrassing is singing this on top note in your car to get over your ex Making the Band (Dainty Cain) - Earl Sweatshirt Acid Hip Hop draws Earl into an era of cosmic future hip-hop - the upcoming album is shaping up to be something special Mungu (God) (Remix) - Blu, Notzz, Black Shakespeare, Bloodmoney Perez No Assumptions - SOLLYY Featuring Dylan Atlantis OPPBOY DOW - OPPBOYZ Pits of Hell - JSV The strength of empire at odds with maniacal chaos. Machiavellian rap perfection plz don't cut my wings - MIKE stuns with tragic, breathtaking beauty. The instrumental is a matrimonial fit for both his style and more solemn emotional side and he glides gracefully on this track like an angel on ice skates. An earl feature doesn’t hurt anyone either.

Prim Proper Freestyle - Zion Garcia A perfect introduction to one of the most promising rappers in Eora, if not Aus. RENO - Teether x Kuya Neil The Roach - Genisis Owsusu Running Out of Time - Paramore An ode to perpetual lateness but making your best attempt anyway Satisfy - Dylan Atlantis The sensuality of this song drips from every word like beads of sweat. An incredible song by an incredible artist Scandalous - Kavi This song could literally turn you into an internet micro-celebrity you can just breathe the controversy. Vibrant and fun as fuck, stream Kavi cause this boy is a future icon. Slap (Telegram) - Sidney Phillips, lil ket, Skracha This song is like a hybrid of three completely separate strains of internet music smashed together and turned up to 11 and its fucking beautiful and I love it So You Are Tired - Sufjan Stevens The fatigue of love in all its terrible beauty. A quiet whisper for love that lingers through the toughest of times. I hope you are ok Sufjan. START A RIOT - Breakfast Road Stay Close - Daine stunt - (when I see u) - They Hate Change The future is offering you a sneak peak, don’t avert your gaze

Sucker Free - Key Glock Sunset - Caroline Polachek Take Me There - Fielded featuring Teether Take Off - Breakfast Road That Cunt - Bootleg Baby, lil ket, Sidney Phillips Touching Yourself - The Japanese House Intoxicating sapphic serenade about women loving women (ME AND FUCKING WHO) Track one from the new Andre 3K record These song names are fucking ridiculous and I'm not as sold on this album as the rest of you but fuck me if this opener isn't soul-affirming. Troy (Cover) - TROPHIE Trophie is another artist I discovered this year and I’ve seen her perform this song about 5 times live already and it Is awe-inspiring every time I hear it  Tyler, Forever - McKinley Dixon

The Well - Behind You featuring Rako, Teether and BAYANG) where's my head at _ Basement Jaxx x 100 gecs I can’t explain to you why this is quintessentially Australian mid naughties electro-pop if it was brought screaming into 2023 but it sounds way too fucking good

You Can Be Mean to Me - Indigo De Souza Men suck and ex's also suck and we girlies deserve better. A perfect encapsulation of the part of moving on where you just roll with the gut punches, absorbing power in passing politeness

#best of 2023 #aus music #my music #music 2023

[lilyellowsongbird]

Song Of The Day - Jan 31st '23

Drink Before The War - Sinead O'Connor

I write my song of the day the day before so it publishes at the same time every day. Today, the 30th of January, is the 1 year anniversary of my grandfather's death. It is also the one year anniversary of my discovery of this song.

I'm not going to lie, I heard this song on Euphoria. Somehow I thought that an incredibly sad show would help distract me from the fact that my grandfather was on hospice. I heard this song, finished the episode, and got a text from my dad saying he had passed away. I don't think I've ever felt despair like I felt that night. Listening to this song, slouching down the dorm hallway to the bathroom. Wanting to cry but knowing I couldn't. A lot of things happened that Sunday, this was just the icing on the cake.

There's not a lot I can say about Drink Before The War. There's not a lot I can say right now at all. It is despair and anger perfectly encapsulated in one heartbreaking song. Sinead's incredible voice rings out, reaching into your heart. She pierces you with her words, almost like she's glaring at you while you listen. The howls that close the song are heart wrenching. They're a punch to the gut.

I found out today that an important housing option at my school will be taken away. It's being taken away without warning by an administration that has continually lied to us for a bullshit reason. I'm angry, I'm sad, and I'm disappointed. I feel helpless. I can't bring myself to do my homework because I feel like anything that I do will have no effect on what's most important to me right now. This college means so much to me, and to finally lose hope in the admin ever caring about its students really hurts. This song reminds me of that night a year ago. I guess this day is cursed for me.

Listen to the song here:

#music #opinion #nonfiction #sinead o'connor #drink before the war #alternative #80s music #song of the day #Youtube

[lumax-mayclair]

Me@Fexi

You make me so happy, it turns back to sad. There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have. You are so gorgeous it makes me so mad.

—Gorgeous by Taylor Swift

#-this verse so perfectly encapsulates my feelings towards Fexi (and their lack of screen time 🥵) #euphoria #lexi howard #fez #fezco #lexi x fezco #fezco euphoria #fez x lexi #lexi x fez #euphoria hbo #fezco x lexi #taylor swift

[downfordiluc]

Albedo x G/N reader.

No warnings needed. Just pure fluff.

---

Synopsis // you always felt as if Albedo's work was his priority, and yet, in a room full of experiments and results, all he sees is you.

Author's notes // My obsession with Albedo grows every day, send help. He's too beautiful for this world.

All works are entirely my own - downfordiluc (wattpad & tumblr)

---

Albedo had never been one who attached a tangible value to relationships with other people. Obviously, he valued professional relationships and cared about his family, but romance and friendship were never bonds he really sought after or felt a need to maintain. Any friendships he did consider himself to have were purely circumstantial and didn't venture past the boundaries of his workplace, and he was content with that; content with being alone. That was until he met you.

"Alone and lonely are not synonymous", was something he caught himself saying to Kaeya one time, who had pointed out that he was often the only person in his laboratory for hours, if not days on end. Truth be told though, Albedo quite enjoyed being by himself and even relished the time he spent being the only heartbeat in the room - unless his experiments ventured into living organisms. He tended to drown out anyone talking to him while he was concentrating regardless, preferring to communicate with people like Sucrose and Timaeus through paperwork and statistics, rather than sentences. And yet, right now, there were two heartbeats in the room, as well as a slight whining sound, as he got nudged in the shins.

"You said you'd be done with this an hour agooo!", the dig in his leg was so soft that he didn't even glance upwards from the test tube he was concentrated on swirling in front of him - bright aqua slowly fading to a crystal clear liquid, sparkling as it spiralled.

Without warning, a warm hand was placed upon yours, his thumb running along the top of your wrist, leaving a trail of warmth as it traveled. For a man who wasn't very fond of socializing, he knew how to say a thousand words with just one movement, and you knew he was sorry for taking so long. His work was what you always considered his priority in life, and keeping realistic about this and knowing you could probably never take that place was what kept you sane on nights like this. Nights where he promised to watch the sunset with you, but the stars were now twinkling in the night sky through the small window of his lab.

The way he watched the colours whirl and merge into one was an alluring sight, his eyes transfixed on the liquid, scanning it inquisitively, and you noticed the colour of the substance was almost a direct match to that of his beautiful, twinkling irises. It was the way he looked at you. The curiosity and fascination flickering behind his eyes, burning in his brain, made your knees weak, as he would scan you up and down. Feelings of doubt and anxiety would always follow in tow, but he stopped them in their tracks.

"You look beautiful today."

Fingers intertwining with yours pulled you delicately out of your daydream, as your eyes flicked up to his own, giving you that exact, disarming look, as you noticed his work pushed aside. Alchemy is purely scientific and has no real link to matters of the heart, and yet you could swear he had cracked the code of love too. His gaze felt calculated and precise, melting you in an instant like one of his experiments. You were an experiment to him in a way - an experiment in romance - and you really hoped he was satisfied with the results.

You knew you were.

Heat spread itself across your face, a pale pink hue dusting across the bridge of your nose and cheeks, as you registered his spontaneous compliment. It wasn't often you saw Albedo smile, so you cherished the fleeting moments when his lips curled up and his eyes glittered that little bit more. Just like that, any lingering frustration you had with him for taking so long faded out of existence, leaving only your infatuation with the one you could proudly call your own. He truly was captivating, and the best part was, he had absolutely no idea. He had no idea that he was beautiful too.

"I made you something, [Y/N].". You pouted slightly as his hand left your own, missing the warmth, as you watched him rummage through the draw on the left of his desk. In his hands, he produced a crystalline bottle. The was glass a pale hue of yellow, reminiscent of his vision glowing faintly under the star on his neck, a mystery you were yet to solve. The way it refracted light scattered little flickers of light all over Albedo's face, like luminescent freckles, and yet they were gone as quickly as they appeared, as he placed the bottle into your turned out hand. The liquid in the bottle glistened similarly to his experiment from earlier, as everything clicked into place.

Holding the bottle up to your nose, you smelled the fragrance of what was inside. Until that moment, you didn't know it was possible for something to smell like warmth, and yet that was exactly what this bottle seemed to encapsulate. Maple, cinnamon, and the smell of autumn captured you lightly, lulling you into an almost drunken sense of happiness. It smelled like cuddles in front of an open fire, but also early morning walks, watching the dew glisten on browning leaves that were slowly cascading from the trees.

September 22nd was the first day of autumn last year, and the day you met Albedo. Light brush strokes adorning the canvas in front of him as he merged hues of orange into hues of pink, perfectly capturing the sunset decorating the sky in front of him. Most people would rush to finish before the sun laid to rest for the night, and yet he took his time, a level of preciseness in each flick of his wrist that you couldn't help but watch, following every movement he made.

"Can I paint you?", the blonde man was now returning your stare, his face void of emotion but his eyes full of eagerness, as he pushed past any defences you had, leaving you with no other response than to say yes.

"How would you like me to stand?" you queried, panicked thoughts darting around your head as you thought you would do nothing but ruin his beautiful artwork. Had he simply pitied you?

"Just like that, you look perfect as is."

At the time, Albedo had no romantic intentions behind this sentence, and yet it had you mesmerised. On this crisp, Autumn evening, you became besotted with the man in front of you, and from this moment on, you would be his muse.

Soft footsteps circled the desk, the sound barely filling the room, as Albedo stood behind you, trapping you in your chair, as you could faintly feel him pressed against your back.

"Albedo?" you questioned, as you felt his breath on your neck, an involuntary shudder following in suit. His presence was short-lived, however, as he trailed his fingers down your arm, goosebumps forming on the tracks he left, as his fingertips landed on the bottle he had given you. He was ethereal.

"Do you like it?"

His enchanting voice hummed against your skin, as you could feel his hair tickling the side of your neck, his lips hovering just inches away from your ear. It took every inch of your willpower to not turn your head and kiss him, and yet you stood your ground, relishing the feeling of being this close with him, knowing these moments were often transient.

"I love it." You spoke softly, controlling your voice that threatened to waver due to his affectionate manner. You had been watching him for hours, as he barely paid notice to you. You had analysed his every feature time and time again today alone, watching every shining hair that had slipped out of his braid and fallen into his face, wanting nothing more than to brush it behind his ear. Luckily this was one of your favourite ways to spend your time, watching him work, and admiring his devotion. He was dedicated, loyal and committed, and these qualities went farther than just his work, which left you feeling secure and loved every night that you slept alone, the other side of the bed growing cold without his presence.

Without warning, a light mist fell upon your exposed neck and collarbone, yet again eliciting goosebumps, as the scent of the perfume he had created made its way up to you, softening you instantly as a sigh of pure euphoria escaped your previously smiling lips. This smile only widened, as he placed a delicate kiss behind your left ear, stroking your hair lightly as he did, reminding you of how much you longed to do so as the hours passed. The spot his lips had rested felt as though it glowed almost as brightly as the vision on his chest did, as it radiated heat long after he had departed.

"I love you." softly escaped your lips, as you turned to face him, looking up at the man who made you feel as though you were floating on delirium and bliss. His head tilted ever so slightly to the side, and yet again, he gave you that stare. The one that made you feel like the results of an experiment, every small feature being perused. You wouldn't be surprised if he had facial expressions down to a science, knowing exactly what every movement of all 42 muscles in a person's face meant. If that was the case, he could see just how in love with him you were at that moment.

"You didn't think I'd forget the anniversary of the day we met, did you?"

Like a deer in headlights, your eyes widened and your lips parted ever so slightly in shock, as Albedo gave you a soft yet sultry look, a smirk creeping upon his lips. How could he read you like a book, and yet you couldn't decipher a single thing he was thinking?

"You didn't forget, did you, [Y/N]?"

Most people would have looked offended, or more light-hearted individuals might have feigned said offence, and yet Albedo's face didn't move an inch, as he kept his gaze transfixed upon you.

"N-No, of course I didn't. I just didn't want you to feel bad if you had.", you stuttered when you were nervous, and this man had left you nothing but a ball of anxiety, as you had almost forgotten to give him his own gift. From your pocket, you produced a small pin of Prithiva Topaz, the shape identical to the star on his neck that you adored so much; a testament to how much of an enigma this man was to you. Slowly rising from your chair, you placed one hand on his chest, grasping at the belt that crossed over his body. Where the black leather of his belt met the gold embellishments that came over his shoulder, there was an empty circle, and so you pinned on the brooch, directly in the centre, your hands lingering ever so slightly, not wanting to take them off of him.

"I love you too." he whispered above you, which led to you looking up at him, your eyes full of endearment for your one and only. A lock of his hair hovered just above your eyes, and so you gave in to your day-long wish, reaching up and tucking it lightly behind his ear, stroking along the strand as your hand left. And yet he caught it, holding it lightly in his own, and kissing it lightly, just above your knuckles. You could not get enough of the feeling.

"Now, I hate to do this to you, but I really must finish this research, but you're free to do whatever you want with my hair as I do.".

Your lover quickly transformed back into the alchemist he prided himself in being, as he sat back down in his chair, pulling your own next to his. Once again, you found yourself wondering how he could read your every thought and emotion with almost frightening accuracy, and you settled on the conclusion that his genius was simply immeasurable by your own standards. All that mattered to you was that if he truly had the power to decrypt your every thought, he was fully aware of the overflowing feelings for him that filled your beating heart daily.

And so, for the rest of the night, your hands brushed through his hair, braiding it once, twice, thrice, as he leaned ever so slightly into your touch, giving you reassuring hums as he shuffled the papers below him. Suddenly, watching the moon rise wasn't so bad, as long as this moment lasted until the sun came up, and you could watch the sunrise together.

#albedo #genshin #genshin impact #genshin oneshot #albedo oneshot #albedo fluff #albedo fanfiction #reader #fluff #gn reader #klee #diluc #kaeya #genshin imagines #fanfic #fanfiction #sucrose

[thefudge]

what do you think of the whole cassie/nate/maddy thing? honestly to me the whole “triangle” just feels like a redux of “brunette girl and blonde girl are best friends but blonde girl betrays brunette girl by hooking up with her boyfriend/ex boyfriend”. like this feels like a repeat of Brooke/lucas/peyton, blair/nate/serena, and Betty/veronica/archie. the only thing that makes this love triangle different than the ones that preceded it is that nate is a psychopath who doesn’t actually seem that interested in either girl.

yeah, you basically summed it up. it feels like sam levinson was trying to deconstruct this triangle, especially with those early scenes of cassie grooming for nate, and maddy's complicated feelings towards cassie, but it all ends up being a weird nothing burger because this season, as far as i could see, left a lot of things unexplored. it's hard to even criticize it because it's so unfinished. even nate's psychopathy is just there to create artistic montages. i remember seeing smth on twitter about euphoria using a track from the virgin suicides for that one scene of cassie and nate walking down the corridor, looking like wax figures, and it perfectly encapsulates for me the pretty hollowness of this show. it knows how to make itself look "classy" and "arthouse", but if you peel back the surface, there's not that much there (at best, it's a more ambitious redux of a previous property, as you pointed out).

#replies #my thoughts #euphoria

[lena-in-a-red-dress]

Metallo!Lena AU Part 22

Despite Kara's patent joy over being included in Lena's holiday event, Lena can't shake the feeling of disappointment that follows her. She can't put her finger on what bothers her about the photo Kara prints and gets framed of them, until one night she's glaring at the picture and a wayward thought darts across her mind.

I should have kissed her.

The thought stops Lena in her tracks, her brain record-scratching to a halt. But as shocking as it is, her new revelation soon envelops her like a warm blanket. She wants to kiss Kara. She... loves Kara.

Lena's eyes sting with tears-- she's in love. A state so pedestrian, so normal... it's something she'd never imagined she'd have again, and yet here it is, proof that despite the parts of her no longer her own, she's still capable of the one thing it is to be human. To love.

She laughs then, a wet sound that leaves her sniffling as she cranks up the holiday radio. The familiar music fills the room, and Lena lets herself bop around to the beat, unable to sit still.

She's in love.

She's alive.

---

She doesn't tell Kara.

As soon as her initial euphoria dims, doubt surges in to take her place. What if Kara doesn't feel the same way? What if the reason Kara got the photo of them framed is because it perfectly encapsulates their friendship-- their friendship, and nothing more?

If Lena says something, and Kara doesn't feel the same way, she'll ruin everything that fills her life with joy: their friendship, working with Supergirl, being roommates, everything. So Lena keeps her discovery to herself, and instead cherishes every moment she has with Kara.

They bake cookies for Kara's annual holiday party, and Lena takes a mental snapshot of Kara smiling at her over coffee, her cheek smudged with flour. She helps decorate the tree, and feels her hand burn under Kara's touch when Kara wobbles on the ladder and reaches for her in reflex.

She avoids the mistletoe Kara puts up like the plague, determined not to be caught beneath it with Kara or anyone else.

There's something special in the way Kara welcomes others into their home. The guests are comfortable enough, but there's a stiffness in their postures to be in someone else's home, but Lena isn't stiff. She's totally at ease, as much a host as Kara. But her eyes are never far from Kara, who looks festive and cozy in a flattering christmas sweater.

Kara glows in the the twinkle of the christmas tree lights, her smile warm and infectious. Heat pools in Lena's chest, and this time it has nothing to do with the kryptonite sitting there. Its all Kara, all smiles, and when Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree comes up on the playlist, Lena lets Kara pull her into the dance they never got at the gala.

By the end Lena is laughing and giddy with happiness, her face flushed. They flop onto the couch together, giggling. Kara leans into her, and Lena knows in that moment there is no other place she would rather be than right here, her arm hooked through Kara's.

She is home.

---

After the new year, Lena finds herself in a state of calm. L-Corp has completed its rebranding and is running smoothly. The media furor around her has largely dissipated with no shocking news to feed them. She and Kara are in a state of perfect harmony.

Even her work with the DEO has been minimal over the holidays, so when Lena is pinged with a set of coordinates, Lena relishes the change of pace.

With a touch of her watch Lena's armor slides into place around her, and she when arrives at the location she's surprised to see Supergirl hasn't beat her there. Cueing her comms, Lena radios back to the DEO.

"Command, this is Luthor. I am on site, please advise."

"Luthor, this is Command. Supergirl and Director Danvers have just wrapped up at another location and are en route. Secure perimeter."

"Roger that."

Lena scopes out the area from a distance first. There doesn't appear to be any movement external to the building, so when she finally approaches she doesn't expect any interlopers. Even so, the lack of life from inside the warehouse puts her on edge.

Maybe it's another warehouse of Coville's, she reasons, and the DEO is concerned more kryptonite may be present. Even if it were, something feels off. Lena carefully approaches, and upon finding nothing of interest at the perimeter, gets a little closer.

As she steps close enough to peer into one of the windows, several things happen at once. A small grenade clinks to the pavement behind her, issuing a thick plume of smoke that blankets the immediate area in a dense fog, blinding her. Lena immediately switches her optics to thermal, just in time to see a hulking figure loom with a rocket launcher at the ready on his shoulder.

When it fires, it releases not a rocket but a fine metal mesh that wraps tightly around Lena with enough force to knock her from her feet. The figure clicks a button and the net comes to life with electricity, surging through her armor and shorting out every circuit. It blinds and burns her, and suddenly her suit locks into place around her, dead in the water.

With her optics gone, Lena can't see or hear anything except her own ragged breath, until an unseen hand reaches under her chin and rips her helmet open. The smoke from the grenade fills her nose and lungs, making her choke. Through tearing eyes Lena can just make out the shadow of another figure crouching next to her.

Something sharp pricks against her neck, and in moments Lena's senses begin to blur. The last thing she hears before losing consciousness is a familiar voice.

"Welcome back, sis."

previous / next

#metallo lena au #supercorp #more holiday fluff! #plus some not fluff #things are picking up again #almost to the end

[trustsalvatorewriting]

wasteland, baby! | kol mikaelson - chapter twelve

Summary: Kol makes a deal with the Hollow to revive the first woman he ever loved. Unfortunately, it doesn’t go as planned.

Trust’s Note: Please like and reblog! I hope you enjoy.

Word Count: 2,288

Prologue | Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight | Chapter Nine | Chapter Ten

❝ what does one do with life when one expected to be dead ❞

"HOW DOES IT FEEL? To be alive, after all these years." Kol asked, eyes barely meeting Aniya's as they sat on a park bench. They had agreed to spend the day watching for strangers, any person that wouldn't mind having a sprinkle of amnesia in their lives. After a while the silence had gone deafening, and Kol decided to speak.

    Aniya looked back at him, somewhat shocked that he had bothered to ask about her condition. She shifted in her seat. "Truth be told, I do not know what to do with the life I hold in my hands. It's as if someone has handed me the moon."

    "Didn't you ask for this? To be immortal?"

    "No. My father did." She said, looking down at her hands. She and Vihaan had questioned his beliefs once, and only once. It was the day that their father held their hands over a fire, and asked who would save them if not the gods. "And what of you? How did Esther create the spell that turned you into vampires?"

    "She didn't create it. She found it, after Henrik was attacked by the wolves one night." He'd said it so casually, it might have gone over the average person's head; but Aniya had known him all his life. "Mother dearest murdered my ability to practice magic that night. About a decade ago, she stuck me in the body of a witch, but I was promptly killed by Finn shortly thereafter. Such a shame. The body was quite handsome."

    He paused, then added, "Of course, not quite as handsome as me. But it did do the job."

    She lifted an eyebrow slightly. "You would give your immortality to be a witch again?"

    "You may have given your life for immortality, but I never wanted this. I was perfectly fine dying at the fine age of thirty years old," He sent her a smirk, and she rolled her eyes. She turned her attention back to the humans walking in front of them. Across the street, an old man and his wife, wrinkly and discolored, hair the color of salt and pepper.

    "It is a wonder how humans learned to live so long. Perhaps my father wouldn't have forced us to into those rituals if he knew humans could become so... weathered."

    Kol laughed then, and Aniya found herself smiling at the newspaper Kol had set down on their laps. After a moment, he asked, "You truly can't read?"

    "I've learned a bit," She admitted. Henry had helped her, using a few pictures books he'd created and never published. Elijah had repeatedly offered her private tutors, but the situation had never been ideal. Even compelled humans would ask questions eventually, and there was something discomforting about allowing a stranger to see her weaknesses. She'd been a gifted witch once, a prodigy; and she had lost to something as simple as American tongue. "I do miss runes though."

    "You'd be the only one," Kol responded. She narrowed his eyes at him in annoyance, and he simply shot her a smile. He turned his attention to the humans. "So, we've sat here long enough. Who will we put out of their misery and erase twenty years worth of memories?"

    "How about one of the weathered ones?" She suggested. "They've been alive quite long. Surely they won't miss a decade or two."

    Aniya had given eighteen years of her life to a set of rituals. Given her life for the sake of her parents. A few memories in exchange for a taste of her old life -- it was a small price to pay. Regardless, humans were never meant to live so long. They were in pain now, surely. Growing weak and inching closer to Death with each passing moment. To walk the streets and see the youth, see all they had lost.

    Perhaps she would be putting them out of their misery. Granting them the ability to forget all they would never have again.

    She stood from the bench and made her way towards an elderly man only a few feet away. Kol leaned back and watched the girl smile brightly, encapsulating the man in a short conversation about passing birds.

    "I can't remember the last time I'd seen a creature so beautiful." She knelt down, though the bird hopped a few steps away. Her brown eyes dimmed for a moment, and Kol felt a heavy weight on his chest as he watched the little bird move away from her. As if it were repulsed.

    "Yes," the old man nodded in agreement. His voice was aged, in a way that even Kol found himself pitying him. "Your generation is so glued to those phones. Rarely even feed the birds anymore."

    "My generation," Aniya squinted her eyes. She was very much his elder, and Henry had tried to show her how to use a phone only a few days ago. Unfortunately, the very concept had gone over her head. "Yes. I agree. My brother, though, he used to care dearly for these creatures. Often found him climbing trees and feeding them leftover scraps."

    She spoke fondly of her brother. It was hard not to. No one had a heart quite as big as his. No one dared to. The world was never made for one as beautiful as him, and yet there she stood, desperate to gain her strength and revive him.

    "What was his name?"

    Aniya hesitated. Her mother had always said names carried power. "Victor. My name is Annie."

    "It suits you," He commented. The man's blue eyes sparkled with kindness, and she felt her stomach drop. "I hope he takes care of you."

    "You needn't worry. My brother was quite the protector," She shrugged off his comment, eyes quickly shifting to the street in front of her. She pushed herself off the ground and focused her eyes on a nearby lamppost. "And what of you? Do you have family? People that care for you?"

    "My wife, Betty. She cared dearly for me," The old man chuckled. He pulled out a small leather rectangle, and Aniya lifted an eyebrow at the gesture. Carefully, he unfolded it and revealed a black and white photo of a young couple. A blonde woman with molded curls and a young man beside him, in a perfectly tailored suit.

    The man slipped the photo out and turned it around. At the bottom right corner was a jumble of letters. Aniya leaned forward to see the lettering, and after a few moments, the man said, "Betty and Edwin. Our wedding in the fifties."

    Aniya's faced soured and she looked away, as if she'd just tasted something terrible. From across the street, Kol lifted an eyebrow. She took a breath.  "Where is she now?"

    "Died of long cancer twenty years ago. I miss her everyday." He said, his voice tainted with nostalgia. Aniya bit the inside of her cheek, a pit in her chest crawling up her throat. Edwin carefully tucked the photo back into his wallet.

    "And you love her to this day? Your love for her, it never died?"

    "In my experience, love never dies."

    "How do you love someone you're sure you'll never have again? How can you bring yourself to love something so unbearable?" Surely he would give in. Surely he could bring himself to forget her. How much she would give in return for amnesia. In another world, she might've belonged to Henry and Henry alone.

    Edwin shrugged. "I'll see her again. It's only a matter of time."

    It was then that she felt something snap. A switch in her mind, flipped, and exchanged for something much colder. Ice rushed through her veins as she stared at the man, and her mind was made up.

    Kol would one day see his Davina once more. Edwin would see Betty, and the world would continue to spin, as she stood paralyzed and alone. Even Henry would leave her eventually. She had only one insurance, one promise that would never leave her: Vihaan.

    "I truly am sorry." Aniya placed a hand on the man's shoulder and whispered a spell beneath her breath. The man's eyes glazed over, and static ran through her veins. She took a step back and raised an eyebrow, ignoring the sense of euphoria that overwhelmed her. "Raise your left hand."

    He obliged.

    "Drop it. Raise your right hand."

    He obliged. She had control of him.

    "Give me your wallet. Go to Lafayette Cemetary and ask for Keres." The man, stripped of his willpower and sense of self-control, handed her the small leather object and walked away in a daze. Aniya swallowed and shoved the rectangle into her pocket. To her left, she felt a slight breeze, and Kol stood by her side.

    Kol watched the man wander away, a brow lifted as Aniya gulped. "You hesitated."

"I'm ripping away an innocent man's free will because we made the mistake of getting married. My apologies if I'm not all that ecstatic about our situation," Aniya muttered. She huffed, shutting her eyes tightly as she turned on her heel.

"Well, lucky for you, we only need two more. I found a poor bastard in the cemetery last night. I'm sure no one will notice he's gone," Kol announces proudly, hot on Aniya's trail as she walked away from him.

"We shouldn't be preying on the innocent, Kol. Especially not men who are mourning their loved ones!"

Kol huffed and sped in front of her, raising his hands to stop her from crossing him. She sent him a warning look, and he sighed. "This one deserves death. Trust me."

She had been given no reason to trust him. In the weeks since she had come back, not once had Kol given her proof that he was worthy of it. Frankly, he's gone lengths to prove the opposite; but somehow, as she stared into his aged, tired eyes, she found herself wanting to believe him.

And so, she nodded, for once giving into his antics. "All right. I suppose we'll just have to find a few more and send them to Keres. I'm sure it won't be that much trouble."

    Regardless, she couldn't seem to ignore the heaviness of her chest — the guilt she carried, knowing she had just sent a man to be stripped of his free will. Her parents had tried desperately to rip her of these emotions, trained her to see human lives as game pieces. Ones that she would have to dispose of once they no longer suited her. Her father had told her to embrace the electricity that ran through her veins when she practiced dark magic, but what was meant to surge of power had become nothing but a parasite. This power had turned her into nothing but a monster.

    "Kol?"

    "Yes?"

    "What did your siblings and father exchange for immortality?"

    He stopped walking then, his feet glued to the sidewalk. For a moment, his amusement faded, but it was quickly hidden away with a smirk. It occurred to Aniya that she might have hit a nerve. "I'm a vampire, darling. Haven't you caught up on the mythology yet? Watched a few scenes from Twilight? I've heard Robert Pattinson is quite dashing."

    "Well, yes, but I'd like to see the truth. I'm not sure how much of that I'm going to find in pop culture." She crossed her arms over her chest and took a step toward him, looking up at his aged, tired eyes. "Show me."

    "You're a stubborn little thing, aren't you," He murmured. He sighed then, leaning back against a nearby lamppost.  Aniya came closer as he shut his eyes, and black veins crawled from beneath his eyes down to his cheeks. His eyes opened, revealing a pair of blackened irises and red, irritated scieras. Kol bared his teeth, displaying his sharpened fangs. When Aniya didn't flinch, the monstrous features crawled back into hiding, and Kol's curious face remained.

    Then, she smiled, almost satisfied with her discovery.

    "Was there any particular reason you wanted to see that, or were you just exhausted from staring at my gorgeous face for so long?"

    "Is this typically how you flirt with women in the twenty-first century?"

    Kol shrugged then, straightening his back and heading back in the direction of the Abattoir. Jealousy seemed to spike at Aniya's chest, as she walked a few paces behind him. How wonderful it must have been to be loved by something that hates all else. To be loved by what was perceived to be a monster.

   She pulled the wallet out of her pocket, running her fingers over the faded photograph. She wondered to herself what might have happened if the Hollow has awoken Vihaan, as opposed to her. He might have been stronger. More willing to sacrifice the lives of several humans in exchange for the life he once had; but then, she wondered if he would have been more willing to give up on a marriage that had so clearly died. He would have been willing to sacrifice it all to ensure that she was back on Earth.

    "I'd like to have this mission finished by the end of the night," Aniya revealed, her fingers tugging at the ring around her neck. "We'll find the nearest elderly person, and send them to the cemetery. You'll have your memories returned by midnight, and I'll have the evening to myself."

    "You're going to see your human."

    "Is that so bad?"

    He hesitated. "I suppose not."

#Nathaniel Buzolic #nathaniel buzolic imagine #nathaniel buzolic x reader #nathaniel buzolic angst #Kol mikaelson #kol mikaelson smut #kol mikaelson imagine #kol mikaelson x oc #kol mikaelson x reader #kol imagine #kol smut #kol angst #the originals #the originals au #the originals imagine #the originals smut #the originals fluff #the vampire diaries #the vampire diaries au #the vampire diaries imagine #the vampire diaries smut #niklaus mikaelson #niklaus mikaelson x reader #klaus mikaelson #klaus mikaelson x reader #klaus baudelaire x reader #elijah mikaelson #elijah mikaelson x reader #rebekah mikaelson #rebekah mikaelson x reader

[gorewhoreonthedancefloor]

Elizabeth is a Guro-Sue.

Summary: Elizabeth Alby has been working at a London strip club for several years, and she's always kept herself aloof. She has secrets, and fantasies, but she's in it for the long game. When the strip club is finally bought out and taken over by someone nice, a man she can befriend and manipulate in order to get what she wants, she's excited.

But her old boss just can't keep his sleazy self away.

She's not about to lose out on a chance to better the club for herself and all the dancers. Maybe it's time to finally give in to what she wants to do oh so badly. Again...

A/N: This is a piece detailing my OCs second ever murder - the one which pushes her into continuing her enjoyment of such. It's set in an original universe based around a strip club called The Deadly Sinners, which features several of my OCs as well as friends of mine! If you're interested in getting to know her more, feel free to ask anything you like! And consider following my new gore centric twitter as another way of talking! I'm very open to expanding the universe and talking about my characters and what makes them tick, etc. In present day, Elizabeth is 28, and has a kill count of maybe a dozen+ kills. This is just the beginning...

WARNING: Explicit detail of murder, violence, and death. Involves stabbing, head trauma, broken bones, and additionally sexism and sexual misconduct. Please do not read if such topics may trigger you!

~🔪 Enjoy 🥰🔪 ~

2015.

About an hour ago Elizabeth had been in the back office with Alix, the new owner and boss of the club. She'd met him almost a year ago when he walked into the club and draped himself over a bar stool. He didn’t square up to any of the girls, didn’t stare them down with carnivorous hunger - he just laughed with the bartender. Elizabeth walked up to him, ready to offer him a dance, but he beat her to introductions. 

"Oh Jesus, you’re a stunner! Sorry, sorry, where are my manners?! Forgive me, I get a little tongue tied around beautiful women, and if I can be so bold, you’re one of the most breathtaking women I’ve ever seen.”

Usually compliments don’t leave Elizabeth speechless. She’s used to them. They’re like white noise for the most part. Him though, Alix, he was different. He had wide eyes, and a smile to match, and he looked at her like she was a friend before he even knew her name. It was like the rushing wind that encapsulates a person when they’re falling from a 50 story building. She felt like she’d finally taken the cleanest, deepest breath in a long time. 

Now, Alix is the new owner of the strip club, and he has big plans to refurbish everything. He wants to tear down walls, redecorate the whole place, give dancers a better backstage area - for a man who’d made the decision to buy a business on a drunken impulse, he was surprisingly serious about making it something. 

The construction team will start working early afternoon tomorrow. An hour ago Alix had been telling Elizabeth his plans, what he wanted to do with the whole place, and that, to her surprise, he wanted her input. He really respects her, and all the dancers. Having a boss who treats her well, looks in her eyes and not over her scantily clad body, it was the kind of unbelievable luck Elizabeth didn’t believe in. 

The pair left each other in good spirits, excited for a new start, buzzing on a shared hopeful high. Alix offered to walk her home but she'd respectfully declined, wanting to enjoy some quiet before she was home. After a few blocks, she reached in her handbag and realised she forgot her keys in the office. She turned around and walked with an urgency to pick them up - ironically, she had the spare key to the club Alix gave her, but not the ones to her flat. Her dad and sister were out of town, so she had to go back…

That’s when she saw a shady looking figure at the club’s entrance. He couldn’t see her from the distance, and if he did, if he caught a glimpse of her when looking over his shoulders in a haste, she’d just look like any other blurry figure walking home. It wasn’t a break in, he had a key, and knowing that, Elizabeth realised who it was. So she waited, let him enter, and snuck in herself a few minutes afterwards.

Now, Elizabeth stands behind the bar, filling a shot glass with vodka, and throwing it down her throat swiftly. She makes it look easy, cracking her neck and muffling a cough in reaction to the burn. It's how she likes to start her shifts usually, with liquid courage. 

Now it’s 3AM on an ordinary Tuesday. The rain has suddenly begun to pound the pavement outside, loud enough to rattle the building - it punishes the world, cleansing the treacherous stains left by sinners.

Vodka splashes out of the glass and onto the bar. Elizabeth takes the nearby rag and wipes it up. She turns around and peers into the wall mirror behind the bar shelf, liquor lining the wood and obstructing a clear view. She pulls out the dark red lipstick from her bra. It's accustomed for her to look her best at every given opportunity, addicted to perfection. She runs it over her plump lips, pouting and popping them to rub in the smooth colour, then stares at her reflection for a minute. Honey brown eyes stare at her, understanding what is about to happen has to happen...  

Now is the time to kill someone again, and not just any random patron off the street. She gets to revel in the joy that her old boss, Stewart, will die by her hands.

She's been working at the club for around 5 years now. It wasn't what she had planned, but it kept her safe in a way she couldn’t explain. She only started working there as a side gig, to get some decent money while she studied. The plan was to be an electrician, get a secure job working on the railway lines. She enjoyed tinkering with electrics. She got her qualifications with ease, but nowhere would accept her at the time. Whether it was the lack of positions available, or the familiar judgement that a woman like her couldn’t possibly be competent, she will never know. Life got hectic, after her mother's death everything began falling like the devil's dominos. Stripping should have been a cash grab, but she adapted to fit the narrative that the dancers she worked alongside became like family.

She’s well liked, though mostly from a respectable distance, with only a few exceptions. Some people find it hard to know what to say around her - she’s usually so quiet, with a look like she’s always thinking. She's never been a shy character. The correct term is aloof, bordering impassible, and smart. She let her co-workers find comfort around her, and she gave patrons the illusion they were her saviours. Everything Elizabeth did was calculated to cater her neverending poker game, and now, still in to win at life, no one truly knows who she is. 

No one knew she thought about murder every day. No one knew she craved the crazed euphoria of killing someone, that which she felt when she’d blugend her mother to death. Every day for the past 4 years she’s been wondering if she’d get the chance to relive that high, planning over and over again in her head when she would do it, who would be her victim - she didn’t expect it to be on a whim like this.

It’s titillating just thinking about it. Damn near erotic. Since she started working at the club, she’s had to deal with the sleazy stare of her boss almost on the daily, knowing his eyes linger on her ass, while his hand cups his groin. He licks his lips staring at her tits, and when she meets his eyes with her evil glare, she can see the unsure arousal lingering in his pupils. He’s putried, truely, pleasuring himself in his office during work hours after watching a performance. Stewart is a predator. He preys on his vulnerable staff, and uses them to gratify his animalistic cravings.

"If you want to rake in the money, sweetcheeks, you’ve gotta smile more. Guys like tits, but they don’t like miserable bitches, kay?”

Elizabeth had imagined his death a thousand times over the second he said that. When he dared to raise his index finger under her chin, condescend her in such a way, she hoped there would come a day she’d get the courage to kill him.

After a few more minutes priming herself like a proud peacock, she reaches into her handbag and pulls out the hunting knife she keeps on her at all times. She used to just have a switchblade, until she passed an antiques store one day and saw the beautiful blood red hunting knife calling her name. She conceals the weapon in her thigh high boots, checking the handle is at a viable point she can grab it with ease. Wrapping her hand around the sturdy rubber, a rushing anticipation of her murderous excitement buzzes through her fingers and up her arm, just like electricity. Her heart is racing. 

She leaves her coat over the bar top, walking out from behind the bar on the first floor and heads downstairs. She can hear his grunting every so often, the slamming of desk drawers and flustered footsteps as he searches for something. Last time she saw Stewart, he'd been wishing Alix the best of luck. Now he's breaking in the day before renovation is scheduled. 

She stands outside the office door and knocks. Light, flirty knocks. A loud gasp followed by a rough, irritable command to enter. Elizabeth hides it well but she's beyond excited to gut Stewart like a fish. She wishes she'd been more prepared for the moment - wishes she made plans, figured out specifics and wasn't going off instinct. There were so many nights she thought about the how's, knowing if she had to feed that beast inside her, it had to be perfect. This isn't perfect like she wants, but it's perfectly good luck, she can't bear passing up the opportunity.

As she walks in, she sees Stewart sitting behind the desk, leaning back, cheeks furiously red and his forehead clammy from sweat. His thinning hair is swept back, more sweat than gel, and clearly only styled by his hand brushing it back. He looks like he always did, in a tight white shirt and scruffy tie, the years of loneliness aging him more than his crow's feet. His lips pull up into a shark like grin when he sees her, all teeth on show, and he chuckles, darkly, kind of like he's been expecting her. Out of all the girls, it's clear that Elizabeth was his favourite, and she plays into that favour by popping her hip to accentuate her curves. His eyes unashamedly fall down her body, taking in the sights, and though it repulses her to let him have the pleasure of just looking at her, she knows the payoff is worth it.

Maybe she can gouge his eyes out while he screams for mercy, deprive him of the tools he wastes on depraved thrills. She's had so many fantasies where she wriggles the tip of her knife's blade into someone's eye socket, and pops their eyeball out their skull.

"Lizzy, sweetheart...what're you still doing here?" He asks, almost timidly, like he's nervous, but still maintaining a confidence he can no longer afford. Elizabeth gently closes the door behind her and leans back on it, crossing her legs over one another. His line of sight hasn’t actually met her eyes yet.

"I left my keys," she nods toward the set on Alix's desk, and smiles when Stewart visibly gulps. "But then I thought I heard someone rustling around in here. Strange to see you here." She pushes herself off and struts seductively toward him. The space between them is only a few steps, but Elizabeth manages to walk it like it's a runway. She leans her head to the side, looking at the mess of paperwork on his desk. "You looking for something?" She asks, just barely above a whisper. Stewart's hot breath pours out on her arm, distracted, then jerks back to the subject matter.

"Oh, yes! Uh I left some paperwork, very important documents, uh confidential actually, so you should--"

"All of this is Alix's." She picks up one of the sheets and inspects it. It's a building permit. She looks over the other papers - a scattered mess of plans and expenses and permits but all distinctly Alix's. Elizabeth hums and sits against the edge of the desk, crossing one leg over the other. Her legs are long, gorgeous, and she knows he wants to touch them. He practically looks enslaved to her beauty, he's forgetting about being caught up to no good. "Nothing here is yours."

"Right. I'm still looking," he answers too easily, but the sweat on his brow is a give away. Elizabeth chuckles under her breath and places the paper back down. She shakes her head at him in disbelief.

"You should have gotten a business partner to help you run this place." Her tone is devilishly flirtatious, dripping in false promises. She looks around the cramp office and shrugs. "A second set of eyes to help you spruce the place up. Maybe then the club wouldn't have been failing and you wouldn't have had to sell it."

His mocking laughter hits her hard. Her gaze snaps back to him.

"You're so naive, Lizzy." Stewart muses, too cocky for Elizabeth's liking. He wiggles his finger in her direction and chuckles. "But naivety doesn't mean shit when you're a stripper, so who cares!" And with that he starts rummaging through the drawers again, unbothered by her presence.

Her blood boils with a heat as intense as a volcano. It takes every inch of her being to resist grabbing the bunch of pens in the coffee cup on his desk and ramming them down his throat. He's still chuckling, like he's the funniest man to walk planet earth. She hates him, truly, but she doesn't let that show on her face of course. All she can do is keep smiling. 

She crosses her legs over, exaggerating her leg outwards so he notices how long and slender she is. She tosses her hair over her shoulders and leans back accentuating her breasts. It doesn’t take a lot to distract Stewart. Her leather skirt and bralette reflect under the dim office light, clinging to her figure, squeezing her curves like a boa constrictor. Her mesh top sparkles like it's covered in every constellation, it’s a wonder she can breathe carrying such beauty. His fingers ache to feel her melt. She tips her head to the side and bites her lip, hypnotising him. 

"What did your girlfriend think of you working all those late hours surrounded by half naked women?” She smirks when he laughs.

"I don’t have a girlfriend.” He pushes himself out of his chair and rolls his shoulders. He’s nervous, hands shaking at his side and sweat dripping down his brow. God she wants to slice the skin off his face and make him screech in agonising pain. If he could read her mind, he might run for the hills. “What about you, Lizzy,” He places his hand beside her and leans in uncomfortably close. “What does your boyfriend think of you, dressed like this,” he motions his free hand around her breasts, “Alone in your bosses office?” 

Elizabeth is almost insulted that he thinks he even has a chance with a woman like her. Of course she represses the disgust in favour of chewing her bottom lip, reaching out to toy with the loose tie around his neck. "Ex boss," She corrects, smugly. His breathing gets heavier, halting only when she harshly tugs on the tie to bring his face mer centimeters to her own. He pathetically puckers her lips, and she snickers, looking at him darkly beneath her eyelashes. 

"Do you really think I’d care what a man thought of me?” Then she throws him back forcefully, standing up and dusting herself off as he stumbles to regain his footing. The force practically winds him. “Besides...I don't have a boyfriend. Boyfriends annoy me too much."

Stewart bumbles through an exasperated laugh, insulted by her statement as if it somehow could apply to himself. He straightens his tie and puffs out his chest theatrically. "You've obviously never been with a decent guy."

"A decent guy?" Elizabeth repeats. "Does such a thing exist?"

"Of course they do."

"Where?"

"Well me for starters!" Stewart blurts out, too wound up to consider the implications of what he's admitting. Before the words settle, she's already looking at him with disdain. A wicked smirk slithers across her face and she rolls her eyes, to his annoyance. "Hay, I'm a nice guy!"

"Nice guys don't break and enter places that don't belong to them," she sharply closes the space between them and backs him up against the back wall, her sweet devil's grin swapping for solid rage. "Nice guys don't make advances on their barely legal employees. Nice guys don't cut corners paying the people that keep their shitty business going."

"Woah, what are you--"

"Why don't you save the bullshit and just fess up to whatever the fuck you're actually doing here, hmm?" She puts her hands on her hips, staring him down. There's a tense silence, his eyes wide and frantic, thoughts visibly racing in the wind of his dilated pupils, and Elizabeth wonders if the pounding drumming of her heart is as ear shattering for him as it is for her. 

She could slit his throat so perfectly at this angle. One sharp sweep of her blade, watching the flimsy pale skin tight across his neck rip too easily, allowing blood to spill and move like a glacier. She could wedge her thumbs into the tight wound and bury them further into his flesh, feel the rigged bone surrounded by squishy meat and warm blood. He'd feel her inside of him, invasive, denying the boundaries no one should know, and she'd laugh as he slowly dies. She wants to rip him apart like a wild animal on a hunt. 

The cracking of bone. The squelch of flesh. The adrenaline rush. It's always just out of reach.

Stewart looks intimidated, but just as Elizabeth starts to enjoy the clouding of her twisted fantasies, he laughs boisterously and daringly places his hands on her hips to move her over. He picks out another folder from the drawers and opens it up, looking over his shoulder to laugh at her, looking at her like she’s some hysterical woman. All Elizabeth can do is stare back at him in disbelief, the clouds suddenly vanishing in favour of making him a clear cut target. Him with his sweaty upper lip, the uneven stubble shading his jaw, his figure a few weeks skipped from the gym - he who dares to break into what isn’t his and still look down on her. It’s a bloodthirsty rage, almost delusionally so, she wonders if it’s all a hallucination, but his laugh is sharp and loud, and she wants to rip his tongue clean out of his mouth.

"Look, babe, you should get out of here, alright? You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into.”

Elizabeth doesn’t move though, just stands her ground, secures her stance and practically growls at him. He rolls his eyes and drops the folder he’d been flicking through on the desk with a loud thud. 

“Fucking hell, what’s it gonna take to get you to fuck off, huh? What, money?” Stewart asks, ridicule thick on his lips as the corners of his mouth curl upward. He digs into the pocket of his trousers and fishes out a worn out wallet, waving it in her face aggressively. She doesn’t flinch, even when he throws it to her feet forcefully and glares at her. “There ain’t shit to even give you.”

Elizabeth softens her brows. She looks down at the wallet splayed out on the ground; bare of any family photo, like most the men who ask for a dance do have. “I don’t want your money.” She replies through her teeth, eyes looking up at him under her lashes. She clenches her fists and squeezes - tries to pop the tensions wrapping around her bones, making her fingers stiff, eager. Then she lifts her head. “I want you to get out.”

Stewart laughs again. This time as he looks up and down her body, it’s with disgust. “Or what?” He mocks, putting his hands in his pockets and rocking on the balls of his feet. He sticks his tongue in his cheek and scoffs when she doesn’t respond immediately. “This will always be my place, it don’t matter who’s name is on the deed--”

“That’s not how it works--”

“Shut the fuck up, okay?!” He bites back at her, specs of spit flying from his lips, his eyes filled with impatient irritation. Elizabeth’s shoulders drop, something snaps. Not like a flimsy stick, more like an aged, cracking tree finally giving in to the woodsman’s axe. The falling weight, the impending thump, it’s all so familiar and yet intimidatingly unrecognisable at the same time. Stewart closes the space between them. He’s only an inch or two taller, but the way he juts out his jaw and looks down at her even with his head held high, he must see her as an insignificant little mouse. “You’re nothing special, sweetheart. You’re just another pretty face in a town with dozens of ‘em!” 

The muscles in Elizabeth’s body burn almost uncontrollably. She’s minutes away from a forest fire, it festers uncomfortably in her fingers. She digs a pointed nail into his chest and pushes him back, seeing shock briefly flicker across his features. “You’re a disgusting waste of space.”

He lets out a mocking laugh, clearly becoming more frustrated at her stubborn disdain. There’s a brief pause, and before she has time to react, Stewart grabs her by her shoulders and shoves her forcefully against the back wall, unconcerned when she grunts from the pain. Her hands grip his wrists to move him off, but he manages to keep her there, trapped by his sweaty palms. He leans in close with his teeth gritted, a smug, infuriating grin lifting his features.

“You think I give a toss what some slag thinks about me?” He scoffs under his breath, shaking his head, clearly enjoying how she struggles to push him away. “I need money, darling. I know some nasty fuckers who’ll leave me in a body bag if I don’t pay ‘em back, so I’m not about to let some skank get in my way!” He takes a deep breath, and growls softly, looking down to admire the plush of her breasts against her see through top. His hands slide down to grip her hips, force her to stay in place, perfectly for his pleasure, setting in the uneasy claustrophobia. 

Elizabeth already hates affection, it sets off alarm bells in her head, the overwhelming disgust ricocheting through her nervous system. The weight of his hand bruises her bones, aches her something fierce, she wonders how long it will take before the ground beneath her feet caves in.

“The things they’d do to a girl like you. I’m not against telling them who you are, the slut that prevented their pay back--”

“I’m not afraid.” She says through her teeth, quietly, confidently. She can feel the boiling adrenaline coursing through her system with every rage inducing second ticks by. She takes his hands and moves them with an uneasy calmness, offering them back to him like he'd lost them.  She lets her hands return to her sides. She tickles the top of her thigh, inching close to the handle of her hunting knife. “You’re a sad wannabe gangster, and nothing more. If I gave even half a shit, I’d pity you.”

Stewart’s face tightens with a frown. He growls some generic sexist insult and attempts to grab her again, but Elizabeth is faster. She finally reaches into her boot and whips out the knife, plunging it deep into his stomach before he knows what's happening. The impact of the knife rips through cotton and flesh with laughable ease, the burst of skin ripping around the weapon's teeth practically ricocheting through Elizabeth. The anger he had is replaced with fear. She loves it.

She keeps him steady with her hand firmly against his collarbone, eventually turning them around so he lands against the wall she was pressed against seconds ago, with the knife still firmly in her grasp, in his abdomen. Taking a guess, she figures the blade is caught amidst the small intestine, probably snagged the bottom of a kidney, maybe even severed a ureter too. She looks up at his face and smiles wickedly. Blood begins to trickle from the wound and down the pooch of his belly. Watching his face slowly fade a ghostly complexion fills her with glee.

A pitiful plea fumbles past his lips, but she can’t hear it over the drumming.  Her heart thumps like it wants out of her chest, pounding so violently like it's going to crack a rib. Her senses have never been so sensitive, the adrenaline sending her on high alert. She’s always so composed, always trying to be perfect, and now…

She pulls the knife from his body swiftly, dragging his breath on the end of the blade, and watches blood come through the flimsy wound opening, staining his shirt a crimson red. She brings her bottom lip between her teeth and flares her nostrils, mesmerized by her work. Stewart tries to beg for help, taking back the cruelty of his ego, but it’s white noise, only encouraging her to make her own music with the tunes of his screams.

She takes his chin in her hand and grips him tight, nails digging into his cheeks harshly. She lines up the knife with where the tear in his shirt indicates the wound and pushes it back inside, catching his flesh and tearing his torso open more than it previously was. She pushes the knife in deeper this time, up to the bolster of the handle, and twists the blade to grotesquely shift Stewart’s organs. The slippery feel is obvious even without skin contact. More blood begins to pour from his wound urgently. Angling the blade upward, she catches something squishy and tender, and swiftly rips it in a flash as she recoils the knife back to her side. Stewart groans in agony, as he has been doing throughout; Elizabeth was just too excited to notice.   

Tears spill down his face, wetting her fingertips where she still has his face in her hold. She tuts and shakes her head. "Here, let me distract you from the pain," and without wasting a second, she grabs a fistful of his hair and swiftly slams his face down on the desk. A loud sick, wet crunch bounces off the walls, his nose certainly broken. Blood pours from his nostrils and he howls like a wounded animal, dropping to his knees, hands pressing against the agonising pain in his belly. 

Elizabeth moves around to be in front of him. She kneels to get eye level and waits until he finds the energy to look at her. He's fading, it's clear in the whitening of his skin. She enjoys how the look of death illuminates the little colour left in his eyes. An endearingly manic smile lifts her face. The memories of her mother etch their way across Stewart's busted, bloody face.

"Fuck you." She whispers, pronouncing every letter with finesse, punctuating the words with venomous hatred. Stewart's face is more blood than skin, but she can still make out the aching fear as he realises he's about to die. Elizabeth wants to drink it up, savour it in a bottle so she can enjoy it again and again and again. She's been waiting for this. She's needed this.

As he opens his mouth in an attempt to speak, she quickly strikes upward with the knife and forces the blade to puncture through the bottom of his jaw. The jagged teeth tear without strain, pushing through his skin and tongue and the roof of his mouth like they’re delicate pieces of tissue paper, but the blunt surface of his skull catches the blade and brings it to a halt. With his mouth open a crack, Elizabeth can admire the grotesque bursting of his flesh. It resembles the inside of a cherry cobbler.

Stewart tries to scream, but his voice drowns in his own blood. The sound is horrendous, just garbled nonsense as he convulses and regurgitates blood, everything finally shutting down. Specs of blood fly from his mouth, a river of red pours out the corners, and Elizabeth holds eye contact all the way through to the end. When his body finally sags, his eyes hollow of any remaining life, she keeps staring like they have the secrets to eternal happiness. Maybe they do. Maybe this is her happiness. In the ravenous, depraved violence of a murder so messy, she can finally feel something real, something that makes her think everything in her life wasn’t all in vein, but rather were the stepping stones that brought her to her wonderland.

After a few minutes enjoying the glamorous solace, she takes a deep, cleansing breath, closing her eyes. Her heart and mind are both racing like they’re trying to outrun one other, and her senses that were so frantic in murderous pursuit begin to steady. She feels hyper-focused. The million questions filling her mind slot into place perfectly one after another, filing away for later inspection. Who was after Stewart? Will they try to come looking for him? Did he tell anyone where he’d be tonight? Important, but they can wait. Now, the seconds she has in the quiet, looking at the blurred reflection in the framed picture on the wall ahead of her, she listens to the cruelty that’s been haunting her for so long.

“This world’s gonna eat you alive, Lizzie. I can see it in your eyes, you have no fight in ya. Why are you such a weak little bitch, huh? Ever since you were small, I knew you’d amount to nothing...just a pretty face, nothing more.”

Her mother’s voice has been taunting her for too long. She carries on living, thriving, trying to forget her wicked memory, and she continues to abuse her. Things get harder, the stress eats her alive. Merry men throw their wallets with no care, supporting coke stashes, and hiding their wedding rings like they were method acting their bachelor days. Lingering hands, security that didn’t care, and the eyes of a predator always lingering out of view, no matter where she went. Elizabeth was the prey, just like any of the girls, relying on the generosity of vultures. All these years, the repressed rage her mother fueled just getting worse in the lion’s den. Killing the first time was like taking a deep breath before drowning again. Now she can really breathe in the fresh air. She feels clarity better than she ever has.

Elizabeth cracks her neck and pulls the blade out on a deep exhale. She stands up as Stewart’s body collapses in a heap on the floor. Now she has to dispose of his body, clean the office, and act like nothing happened. Tomorrow a construction team comes by to knock everything down and rebuild. Death won’t matter as long as it’s hidden, and Elizabeth doesn’t feel a shred of worry over covering her crimes. She has a plan.

Now she knows what she wants. She wants to tear people apart, see what's on the inside. She wants to do this again, and again, and again...

#OC #OC art #oc writing #serial killer #serial killer OC #Killer OC #guro girl #Goro #blood #gore #fic