#so that means a lot of good people who arent able to do huge big good things

[definitelynotshouting]

Okay, so, question I've had for a while but never got around to asking, what the FUCK is up with Grian's wings?

If all physical differences in players (like those particularly ascribed to 'Hybrids' in mcyt fanon) in Hunger AU are a result of conscious altering of your own code for the express purpose of achieving YOUR IDEAL BODY(tm) then what does that mean for Grian and his wings? No one seems to regard Grian's wings as "What The Fuck, You Can DO That?!?" so presumably wings aren't so big of a change from normal biology that players can't do that. If so, why is it not more common? Man, if I could have wings I'd jump on that in seconds. Especially with the sheer utility the ability to fucking FLY gives players. Are wings (and maybe other larger alterations) just like, REALLY HARD to code in? If so, that might add a really cool layer of "Oh wow! They must be a really good coder!" to players who meet people like that.

On a related note, Grian seems to have a positive regard for his wings, which is interesting because I would be willing to bet he didn't have that before *insert sounds of worm-bursting and non-consensual body modification*. I imagine seeing his wings would likely feel like a reminder of the Watchers and what they did to him. BUT, Watchers manipulate their own code when they change like Grian did to, y'know, not be a worm anymore so Grian probably specifically chose how he looked, right? So, unless he did so really rushed and somehow made a mistake while doing so (which he might not be able to risk the structural damage of correcting), keeping the wings was a conscious decision. Does Grian just not associate his wings with the Watchers or is it something else? Does he just really enjoy having wings?

HELLO I AM SO GLAD YOU'VE ASKED THIS BECAUSE I HAVE ‼️‼️‼️‼️ MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT IT ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

Okay okay so these are all SUCH valid questions, lemme go through them one by one. Wings are indeed something anyone could have if they wanted to code them in-- and in fact, i do believe many other Players have wings throughout the universe!!! As far as body mods go, i like to think of them as decently popular, so its definitely not anything too weird to see. In chapter 5, i even make a mention to Pearl having moth wings she occasionally codes in due to preference!!! So wings of many different types are definitely available-- but the catch is that they're real fiddly to code. You cant just give yourself wings, you have to code in the bone structure, the muscles, the tendons, etc etc, and then you have to change your entire body structure as well to work with and fully support them. They can be awkward and unwieldy, as ive tried to show in the fic itself, and i think that alone can be a big discouragement for Players considering coding in wings, along with the sheer coding effort needed to obtain them and make them functional

And the thing is, elytra already exist-- they're far more compact, they dont take up as much space, you can take them on and off super easily without having to mess with your coding, and they basically do the same thing. Sure, its a pain to get one, but a lot of Players really enjoy the sense of accomplishment, and i think theres a bit of cultural prestige too in that regard. Server milestones are a huge thing in Player culture, and getting your first pair of elytra is a big one!!! So it makes sense to me that people who just dont want to go through the effort of coding in wings (which can then in turn complicate how they code other future modifications) primarily stick to elytra.

And everybody is different-- some people prefer attributes that arent wings. I like to think everyone in hermitcraft generally is a mix of "jeez thats effort, i could be building my base instead of doing that" and "eh im fine how i am, i like it" and "well we have elytra shops everywhere so why bother".

So in short, yeah!! Wings are a bit complex to code in. They're still pretty popular, i think plenty of Players do choose to incorporate them, but it takes a lot of hard and thorough work to make sure they function right and wont bug you out when you use them. There are billions of Players scattered across the universe, so what you're seeing in the fic right now is truly just a drop in the ocean when it comes to Player body diversity :] and then, elytra basically already help Players achieve a form of flight without the hassle of recoding their entire body structure, so i think the majority of Players just prefer to use them instead.

AS FOR GRIAN'S WINGS IN PARTICULAR......

Well..... its complicated. Particularly his feelings about them-- in the fic, i referenced them as the only good thing the Watchers ever gave him, and thats how he sees it, i think: a thin silver lining. He's had many, many years to get used to them, and i think he goes through periods where he hates them and the memories attached, too. Ultimately, he's kinda stuck with them, so i think he hit a form of acceptance (as bitter-tinged as it may be) out of sheer necessity for his own sanity.

As for why he has them, and hasnt coded them out: i think of it as a particular quirk of biology/structural coding. Watchers have a more instinctive way of coding than Players, but a Player-minded Watcher is still going to think like a Player, and thats going to muddle things a lot. Grian essentially had to relearn how to code, in a way that satisfied both Player and Watcher-style coding, and the results at first were.... a little rough around the edges. Once he managed to finally take on his original former appearance, the wings from his true form just kind of.... stuck. I like to think it took a few increasingly desperate tries before he realized he just could not figure out how to get rid of them (bc of how different his new code was), and had to accept that this was just how he was gonna have to live for a while until he finally figured it out. And then, well.... you can get used to anything, if you're stuck with it long enough. I think after a while it just stopped being a huge priority, and then he reached a point where it would be more awkward to live without them than with them, and he eventually dropped the idea altogether. And i think sometimes, they function almost like a scar, to him-- a reminder of what he went through, yes, but a reminder that he did manage to escape. And, ofc, he also just really, really likes flying skdjskdjdj

So yeah, loads of complicated feelings there about his wings, and its stuff i do plan on exploring later in the fic!!! This got a little rambly, but i hope this makes sense and answers your questions!!!! :D its a fun little complicated knot that im glad someone has gotten curious enough to ask about!!!!

#shouting speaks #asks #hunger au #grian #watcher grian #watcher!grian #hermitcraft #ig like. basically its all abt human behavior at the end of the day #not everybody codes in wings bc not everybody wants to. grian chooses to keep them bc hes lived w/ them so long it feels better this way #also i do think it took several tries for him to regain his player appearance. like he glitched several times #while trying to modify his body to accomodate the Problem Wings™ #kinda like... what was it. load bearing coconut in the tf2 games #you take it out the entire game wont start #he tried taking out his wings and it almost turned him into goo. atp it was better just to leave them until he gained more experience #and then when he got to that point it no longer felt like a priority/he'd settled into having them #so yeah fkwjdkekdk human illogic behavior. ur gonna see that a TON in the fic itself #long post #txt

[fuck-customers]

🎂(8/21/23) This will be a bit long but now that I don't work at the bakery anymore I felt like sharing the list of things that customer's did that genuinely irked me amongst other feelings:

Things customers do or say at work that make me want to commit a war crime (+ my thoughts I can't say outloud):

"I want to get one of everything. 🤪" (Fun fact, 1 of everything is about $100)

"I'm shouldn't even be in here right now." (Then why are you???)

"I'm breaking my diet for this." (I don't care.)

I shouldn't be eating this I'm diabetic." (I have family that's diabetic. Please actually take care of yourself. 😐)

Does __ count for the B5G1F?" (No, it's actually only the vanilla cake squares. /s)

"Can I have one of that and one of that?" (The name. Is on the display case. SAY THE GOD DAMN NAME.)

"Are yall still open?" (You were able to open the door weren't you? You were able to step inside…weren't you??)

"Wow I got here just in time huh?"

(Yeah. You did. Now hurry the fuck up.)

after paying for the things they've already wanted "Can I actually get _ too?" (I can't really tell you no but holy shit why did you just now think of this?)

after paying for their things they proceed to look at all the merchandise and find something else "I'm gonna get this too." (Of course you are. 😐)

points at the devil's food cake, which is clearly labeled "Is this a brownie?" (Does it look??? Like a brownie??? If you move to your left about 4 feet you'll see actual brownies.)

"Can I get a devils food cake square?" "With which icing?" "…what do you mean?" "We have 3 different icing flavors for the devils food cake. Which icing?" "Oh. Chocolate. :)" (Fuckin- you can clearly see that we have 3 different icing flavors on display why is this so hard.)

"I don't get how you can work in here." (I need a paycheck and I get a good discount.

Also after a while you get bored of all the sugar.)

"I wouldn't be able to work in here. I'd eat everything. Haha" (Haha, yeah, I bet you would. 🙄)

literally anyone who comes in reeking of weed (…can you don't though? Idec that you smoke but why are you coming in when it's so strong???)

"Can I get a pint/quart of this flavor of ice cream?" (…why. I hate making pints and quarts its stupid and if the ice-cream is super frozen it's an actual pain in the ass.)

any family of 5+ that comes in all wanting ice cream (Please go away.)

"Can I get the pieces that have a lot of icing?" (Not really, cause the baker spread it pretty thin.)

*grown adult gets pouty when they realize that the cake squares I gave them had a

thinner layer of icing than the display* (Much like when you were a kid, pouting doesn't help. Do you want the cake or not?)

someone asks how good a certain item is I generally say it's pretty/really good. "Oh, its just pretty good?" (Yeah, cause I'm not a huge fan of that item. But you might like it cause, you know, different taste.)

Literally anyone who doesn't know the pick up name for a cake, or any details about the cake.

Wanting a fondant cake with a 24 hour notice and getting upset when we can't do it (fondant takes a least 2 days to dry)

People who forget which store they placed their order at. (We only have 2 locations????)

People who don't understand that we close early on Sundays.

People who leave the store reeking of weed. Like, the smell stays for like 5 minutes.

People who come in for a specific flavor that

we've never made. And get upset that we dont/wont/can't make it.

Everyone who doesn't understand that pumpkin spice and carrot cake are seasonal flavors that replace each other during the year. (And no. We can't just make you a carrot cake cake during pumpkin spice season because we physically don't have the ingredients.)

Everyone who doesn't understand the big 5 get 1 free deal.

People who try to open the door an hour before we open or an hour before we close and look visibly upset when they see me not move to let them in like we arent???? Open???

People who don't even try to open the door at our smaller store and think we're closed when we are open. (And people are often inside.)

People who try to hold a conversation for way too long

People who don't take an extra 2 minutes to look for what they want before asking me

where it is only for it to be a foot to their left.

People who dawdle at closing time.

People who leave their phone/cask/card in their car and have to run out to get it. They normally don't notice until their rung up.

People who try to break a $100 bill within the first hour of being open then get surprised when we don't have enough change to do that.

One of the worst interactions I had was in the bakery. This lady asked me if the strawberry cheesecake was good. I said "if you like strawberry it is." I guess that offended her somehow and she made it her mission to see my try a piece so I can tell her if it's good.

The problem with her plan is I'm allergic to strawberries. She was not having any of my "lies" and found anyone and everyone one and told them I am a horrible worker because I refused to "accommodate her request." She eventually ran into the only douche canoe manager we had at the time and got him to start insisting I try a bite to make her happy. I ended up just walking out on the rest of the shift and he tried to write me up. HR forced him to drop it when I threatened to sue.

-Rodney

[yandere-flower]

Okay so I had this whole plan to go over who would be besties and enemies within the boys group then the girls group, and then both together, but I became obsessed with the girls friend dynamic!

So for the girls I can see a sort of mean girls friend group situation happening because they all have their own very different and distinct personalities that could on one end allow them to lean on eachother for various types of support or on the other end, cause a lot of conflict.

First off, Zara is obviously the head honcho. The elite leader of the group who takes the initiative to plan where they are all gonna hang out, what they are all gonna do, ect ect. I feel as tho she'll take into consideration what the other two are into and sometimes do things that fall into Olive and Margos interests, but most of the time shes calling the shots. Also I can see her being VERY overprotective over the other two if they become good enough friends. Like, she'll act as if they are disposable at times but if someone makes a sly comment on Margos apperance or says Olive is an airhead, Zara is going for blood.

Olive is the super supportive positive bestie who although may not know whats going on sometimes, will undoubtly stab a bitch or help in a makeup or outfit crisis. She is down to do basically whatever and has enough positive energy to get the group out of any negative vibes when they are in a less than pleasant situation. Also I personally think Olive is really great at dealing with more emotional situations so if maybe Margo was having a panic attack or feeling very uncomfortable Olive is the one who is able to bring her back down, and the same goes for when someone angers or upsets Zara. Olive jumps right in to difuse the situation so Zara doesn't commit a murder.

And Margo, albeit the more shy and reserved member of the trio, provides good analytical advice for different problems the other two are going through, and is a VERY good listener. Margo is the very much needed calming factor in the group due to the others huge personalities but also knows when to step back when needed. Now I think the other two push Margos limits a lot due to the fact that she is not big into social situations with a lot of people and that can perhaps lead to arguements further down the line, but I dont nessicarily think that its a toxic friendship and that Margo is being forced to do anything she doesnt want to. At least most of the time 👀, (Peer pressure is no joke) but I think that Margo sort of likes the fact that her friends care so much as to try to push her to be better, although they can be A LOT sometimes.

There are many ways that this friendship can fail due to their comflicting personalities, but I think with communication and understanding (maybe in a world where they arent yanderes 👀) they can have a really great and long lasting friendship.

Also just IMAGINE how terrifying the idea is of these three teaming up to do illegal shit, thats a whole other post lol

I feel so bad I asked this question then BOLTED because of a busy work week but here we are now!

I love this mean girls idea because each one does fit perfectly into a role and trope, and it really just amplifies their individual quirks and personalities by 100x.

#flower answers #margo #zara #olive

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Repost: Ask on BTS Paving the Way

Anonymous: Hey bpp. You talked a little bit about the 'BTS paved the way' discourse on your pinned post but I'm curious to see - read? lol - more on your thoughts about it. If youve talked about it before, can you pls link? Since you might not want to discuss/rehash this at all lol. I got curious because this discourse seems neverending and i just watched a yt video essay abt it. Imo, both sides of the spectrum - army and kpop stans -seems to be missing each other's points. Like, i think a lot of kpop stans havent paid attention to what bts have contributed to kpop and theyve dismissed armys arguments entirely and i think a lot of armys havent been into kpop and kpop history to definitively say the stuff I've seen them saying. A lot of the arguments and statements are very inflammatory too and while I agree with what armys are saying, the language they use isnt going to make kpop stans listen - i mean, the ones who arent blinded by their hate for bts/army anyway lol like a lot of kpop stans think when army say bts paved the way/bts popularized kpop, they always think army mean popularized it in the west. When we have receipts of them doing spectacularly globally, especially in places like india where they seem to have exploded since dynamite. Theyve also broken a lot of records in japan, where kpop is already popular but still seem to have a lot of trouble penetrating mainstream bec theyre very insular. They also think that we mean 'first to xxx', which isnt really what we mean at all. And a lot of army seem to dismiss what older kpop groups have achieved too and just like to prop up bts while putting down other groups and dismissing what theyve achieved for the genre. I just think since a lot of armys are in kpop only for bts -same tbh - we tend to be ignorant of the genre as a whole, which isnt good bec we're always arguing x member is the best in the industry or even bts is carrying the industry on their backs, which dismisses a lot of great artists that are doing great work like solo artists like taemin. Like, I'm an army and I'm not a "stan" of any other kpop artists but the whole argument just makes me v v uncomfortable. I guess i still haven't adjusted to stan culture since i've never been a fan of any artists like i am of bts - to the point of joining the fandom and really immersing myself in it - so the intensity of it is still jarring to me. I know it happens with big western fandoms like taylor swifts too but i think i'm still old school when it comes to being a fan of a musician, you listen to the music, rave about it to friends and buy/stream the music and go about your day.

**

Hi Anon,

Anon, I sympathize completely and not to harp on you here, but my first instinct reading this was “who cares?” - this is generally how I feel about this topic whenever I see it, so not knocking you specifically here. And I’d just like to remind everyone there’s an active, senseless, and deadly war raging right now in Ukraine. Please donate and/or pray for Ukraine if you’re able to.

(And then there’s the leader of Stray Kids who is probably a bigger ARMY than me at this point)

This is not me dismissing the gripes of stans of 1st and 2nd generation groups (the usual suspects), this is me saying that what I’ve seen of this discourse is huge swarths of people engaging in an elaborate exercise in collectively missing the point. And yes I’m also referring to those splitting hairs over the semantics of what it means to pave a road. (Heaven help us). And you already allude to this in your ask, anon.

The phrase: 방법을 만들다 which is what a lot of Koreans have used to describe 'paving the way’, is colloquially used to mean 'chart a course’ or someone showing how something can be done.

If this were a normal conversation with normal people and not k-pop stans, it would be enough to point out that yes, BTS was not the first k-pop group to step foot outside Korea or in the US, but BTS is the one group that has gone farther than any k-pop group has before i.e. created the new path. It’s really that simple. BTS has become a household name globally without doing a single show at Coachella nor having any of the mediaplay seen for other groups that attempted to fully break into the US market. The fact that Korea’s military enlistment laws (which before BTS were enshrined as basically unchangeable) have been modified at least partly on their behalf (and for the benefit of any idol who meets the criteria) and that BTS is the first k-pop group to receive a Grammy nomination, has created a new tier, the highest one yet, of what is possible for k-pop artists.

BTS is the biggest group in the world. They rival Coldplay according to Coldplay. Before BTS, the reality is that this ambition was not even within the realm of possibility for much of k-pop. Even with BTS breaking the records and gaining the influence they have, k-pop is still considered to be niche in some circles, though there is undeniably more visibility and investment brought to the genre since BTS started snagging headlines. Some people still hope BTS will go the way of Psy and BoA who were a fad on the Western landscape for a minute then essentially faded into obscurity. But so far, that’s not what has happened, and everyone is paying attention to see what BTS is doing right, that perhaps other groups can emulate.

BTS won’t be the biggest group in the world forever, but the chances that the next biggest group is a k-pop group, is significantly higher now because of BTS.

La fin.

It’s true some ARMYs can be downright disgusting with how they throw around BTS’s accomplishments and sometimes ignore, dismiss, downplay, or just straight up shit on older groups who made the first moves into Western spheres, whenever this topic comes up.

But a part of me understands them. When BTS won the TSA award in 2017, it felt like hell to be on Twitter and I wasn’t even an ARMY at that point. I did a search through my old screenshots and found more than 15 k-pop fandoms spent weeks shitting non-stop on BTS and ARMYs about how useless it was to win at the BBMAs. It was a non-stop barrage of racism, xenophobia, misogyny, all the -isms you can think of related to POC musicians. Though of course BTS was not the first group to go to the US, all of a sudden, k-pop stans were convinced BTS had 'sold out’, abandoned their heritage and were pandering to 'white colonizers’ (sound familiar?). I started calling myself an ARMY the next year (2018) and as I’ve said already, I was reporting things almost constantly. It was hell.

*

You’re right this discourse seems never-ending because it is never-ending. Remember you’re dealing with k-pop stans who will argue with you that water isn’t wet if it means something positive for their group and some ARMYs are just as bad. Whenever I see people arguing about what paved the way I just mute that whole conversation. I sympathize with you feeling uncomfortable about this topic. I’d like to suggest doing what I currently do which is to not waste a single moment of a single day worrying about something that’s already obvious and settled. This particular discourse is the perfect example of a time sink imo, because really, who cares?

Originally posted: March 18th, 2022 1:35pm

#bts army #fandom #paving the way #bts paved the way #repost #kpop #kpop fandom

[malinelle]

the thing with the breakdancing dad thing is like . for clarify i am in almost the same situation as ppl think shes in i was raised by my mom who was financially neglecting me and cutting my dad off from me when he wanted to see me and she was taking the child support money he was paying her to spend on herself i am the person who is the most in a position to sympathize with him but like i just dont. bec okay

that wasnt that many videos and the fact that its all holidays and special events isnt at all contradictory with 'he was there for some big events but he wasnt There in our lives', and the fact that this is also just like how home videos tend to work makes them really not convincing "evidence" of a happy childhood. like were u expecting to see videos of her saying she fucking hates her dad and hes never there for her To The Camera. when i was with my moms side of the family obviously you smile for pictures and act cute in front of the camera bc they get mad at you if you dont! also hes REALLY invading their privacy by posting videos that arent even of her and are instead of his other kids who literally have nothing to do with this. ALSO childhood evidence is always going to be skewed in the parent's favor bc the kid straight up isnt old enough to rly be able to advocate for themselves. notice how the videos switch to photos as she gets older meaning we have no idea how they interacted when they talked and the one text message she shows is them interacting rly awkwardly like two distant acquaintances

man fuck this dude for calling it "brainwashing". like Again it literally happened to me my mom was lying to me to steal money that was meant for us but he could just. say that. the concrete thing she did wrong. instead of being like It Was The Genders.

theres no proof that he paid anything. he said millions but like he just said that. people can lie. very silly and quirky that he has video evidence of his 10 yr old kid talking about youtube as definitive proof he was a loving father but he cant figure out how to censor one of the bajillion emails they send you when you pay medical bills. tbc i dont rly think he shouldve posted either bc again sensitive information but if youre gonna doxx your kids at least do it in a way that looks less like youre trying to use unreliable footage to make an emotional appeal over the Factual Innacuracies. same thing with screenshots of all the insane bitchy things your daughter and wife are totally saying

the most damning thing: dude you have your daughters phone number. if you really had a good relationship and she was exaggerating to make a story funnier you wouldve messaged her like "??? we made lasagna together last week why didnt you tell me i abandoned you at your mothers doorstep" and she wouldve been like "im sorry father i sold you out for views" and then she wouldve made a video breaking keyfabe. personally i dont believe women are insane gender-brainwashed lunatics so i figure she had her reasons

he stresses their politics differ a lot so my actual projection is that i figure madi as a kid was fine with her dad only showing up for holidays and not really being around and wasnt really thinking about money stuff but then as she grew up she started re-examining their relationship and drifted away from him as he became a sexist bitcoin breakdancer and so eventually she had a negative enough view of him to make a pretty uncharitable video bc if you and your dad had a huge argument over him being a sexist bitcoin breakdancer and then you saw a tiktok challenge about funny trauma you might very well think "oh man. the fact that my dad divorced my mom and then started a breakdancing career is funny as hell. im going to flatten this fairly complicated family history to fit into a tiktok" and then when her dad who she doesnt like anymore made a public response she doubled down bc fuck that guy he hates women. its not like shes sending hitmen to his front door she made a mean tiktok. ppl are acting like this has destroyed his reputation but im gonna go out on a limb and say that the ppl making fun of him for being a deadbeat dad are probably not ppl who otherwise wouldve been fans of a sexist bitcoin breakdancer. i think his core audience was never gonna be shattered by this which i am more sure of bc even before he posted a reply bitcoin bros were gathering around him like protective mother birds. if he didnt want his daughter to disrespect him and re-examine his treatment of her as an adult with a more critical eye, personally i would suggest he be nicer to his daughter and not call her brainwashed or talk about how its all genders fault. i think that would really help convince her to have a more positive view of him

#泳帽

[terraliensvent]

I’m sorry put the op was right about them being human beings with thoughts and feelings. Did it come off to strong? Yes. But the fact you have to put the glaring issue of they can’t take criticism as your stance isn’t even a viable way of proving your point as there have been clear efforts to change things in the community as of recently. Now that Temul is in charge of the group!

Not saying the fair of amount of criticism isn’t justified. In fact there is always room for improvement and it should be heavily encouraged.

But shouldn’t mods be people you trust? Not total strangers? but active community members who become good acquaintances with staff? No seriously. I’ve been spectating the server since July of last year and half of those people didn’t even know each-other til they met on the server. Some of them aren’t even friends til being asked to join. And so what if they’re friends? That means they’re a trustworthy candidate that can be vouched for.

It’s actually insane how people will just assume the worst out of a situation without any definitive answers but purely based on their pre-decided judgement of others. Which is a huge issue right now especially with cancel culture.

I can’t even begin to explain how entitled half the people in closed species communities are because half of the problems stem from the people themselves. Now this is a vent blog and it’s meant for voices to be heard. That much is obvious. All you need to know is change doesn’t happen within a week. It takes months so don’t assume the worst in situations or you’re gonna stay bitter in these communities when you eventually quit.

Stay safe and touch grass 👍

post related

i feel like youre neglecting to acknowledge the full range of points i made in my last response.

yes, theres change happening within the past 2 months, but theres also things to have gripes about. im glad things are seeming to move toward getting better, but at the same time that shouldnt deflect from the fact there are still things to be worked on

i understand theres the big rework happening right now with stuff, but for transparency’s sake im not going to give points for things that arent completed. you can say youre working on things, but until i can physically see them and be able to make a judgement on the effectiveness of implemented changes, im not going to comment on them because i dont want to have to retroactively edit my perspective.

also, “mods are making changes” and “mods cant take criticism” arent mutually exclusive. the changes being made currently are a result of the work getting too hard for them with design approvals because they were SO nitpicky and people actually started to complain on a large scale. but as seen in the suggestion forums, not a lot of suggestions seem to be really introspected on. ive seen so many solid ideas that work for other large species just be totally tossed out because “its too much work for mods” but yet when more mods are hired, they dont seem to be doing really any work.

which brings me to my next point, i said in the last post i would have been more forgiving about all the mods being in the same clique if it werent for the fact that the new mods never seem to be doing anything besides promoting commissions. quality of life improvements are constantly denied because the workload is “just so difficult” but then you never actually see evidence of extra hands being used to make big change. again, if you keep adding people do the mod team it should not be taking weeks to get a MYO design approved.

im gonna barely entertain the last bit of your ask simply because it comes off as intensely patronizing to me. are we really talking about cancel culture when the issue at hand is “terra staff are bad at taking criticism?” it comes off as very much “holier than thou” mentality when you call others entitled for daring to say they dont like the way things are run. change takes months, yeah, but thats when you actually DECIDE to change and not shrug it off because “work hard :(“ dont put yourself on a pedestal just because youre more dismissive of things than others

#closed species vent #terralien #closed species #terraliens #vent

[d-nora]

I dont like to talk political because of all the hate. I see people treat other people like they are less than human beings based on assumptions, judgement, and false information that has no factual basis. Being an afro-latina is citizen I see both sides. Both sides they have fear. Lots of fear. Fear of the safety of our loved ones. I understand there are very bad people in the world but the world makes the judgement that all those bad people come from one side and one side only. Corruption is all over the world. In 2009 there was a lot of corruption involving the united states government and Central American counties. My country Honduras is one of them. Is poured a lot of money into a corrupt military. Arming the wrong people with weapons. Some is government groups even had heavy involvement with cartels in Honduras. My brother was victim of that. My mother lived in a poor area ran by a dangerous gang. They had told my brother he needed to rob a house for them and if he didnt they would kill my mother. When situations like this arise there is no calling police and seeking for help because you cant trust the police. You cant rely on them as much as you were to in the united states. So of course my brother had no choice. That choice ended his life for it was a set up from the beginning. Him and another boy even younger than him were shot dead by an American. My big brother is gone. In Honduras your rich or your poor. There is no in between. My family is of course on the poor end. My twin brother Dany works at the big American company you all know Dole. We provide americans with many bananas every year. My brother works very hard all day long to come home with nothing more than $8 American dollars for a whole days of work. How do people live and support themselves let alone their wives and children with $8. This is a HUGE American company so the hardwork of the people who provide you with a good is only worth that? That’s a insult. A fine example of the hate in this world. We have hurricanes causing an increase in poverty while we already struggle but you still can’t come up with a safe smart way to prevent what is happening in the world now? If your telling yourself that its a lie. Several years ago my cousin migrated to the united states risking his life because if he didnt he would of lost his life. The same gang members that set up my brother also tried to force my cousin to smuggle drugs for them due to the fact he is a fisherman. Refusal to do what they ask means your life will be taken so he ran. He crossed, he got locked up for months being mistreated and neglected but with patience support and hardwork I was able to get him out. He is safe, healthy, and thriving. He is a good person! Nothing close to a criminal. But as we all know the people who cross arent like my loved ones. When large numbers of people are crossing they arent going to all be good people which has nothing to do with where they come from because their ate bad horrible people everywhere people migrating from russia, spain, china, ukraine, somali, or anywhere else in the world could be good or bad but the ones coming from the border from central/south america are specifically bad. Tell me one good factual reason why us?? Why are we the bad ones. Spread love not hate. Creat empathy and understanding. Educate

[hprse]

Im trying to think of how to do this comic i want to do w those characters i redrew that meme as a while back

#txt #my ocs #like on one hand i have an interesting idea for it #but on the other hand ive never written a proper continuous comic before and worry about making it consistent without drawing it out #for too long a time. #the story is a take on a corruption of the afterlife (original i know /s) #its not the same as like the good place or whatever where its like the whole system just screws everyone over #but rather one system is screwing up the whole thing for everyone and the people who are in charge and arent effected #just dont care #as opposed to paying attention to both intentions AND actions like in tgp #its rather it pays too much attention to solely the actions because they cant see the intentions or whatever #as well as it doesnt pay attention to the ratios #so basically if a rich person with billions donates a million dollars they get a LOT of credit towards going to a positive afterlife #so that means a lot of good people who arent able to do huge big good things #have a much lesser chance of getting to the positive place #while shitty people (especially rich people) have a much better chance of going to a positive place #also homophobia or lgbtphobia or whtever just dont exist here bc i said so #but yeah i have a cool idea for a big plot #but ALSO i feel like it could work as a like. day in the life thing? idk

[betawooper]

rating every demon fight in kny bc i can

non-biased, completely objective rating (more or less) of every significant demon fight in kny based on a number of factors, including:

cleverness of fighting tactics

placement in the story’s timeline

integration of character backstories

cohesive themes between characters

etc

by non-biased and objective i mean i’m not skewing the rating if a death felt fair or whatever

everything past where the anime ended will be under a read more so anime onlys who havent watched mugen train, youre safe lol

oh and i reread the manga like 20+ times (reread the latter arcs at least 40 times, haha hyperfixations am i right?) so be rest assured im not pulling these ratings out of my ass

also ill randomly be bolding certain phrases just to improve readability

anyways let’s gooooo

VS NEZUKO

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kamado Tanjirou and Nezuko. Tanjirou is fending her off by putting the axe handle in her mouth, keeping her from eating him. End Image Description.]

10/10

i like how realistic it is, because yeah tanjirou would react the way to he did with zero fighting skills against a demon

very clear why tanjirou is fighting nezuko and shows a bit of worldbuilding on how normal people react to their family becoming demons

always nice to see worldbuilding

giyuu is the perfect example of a seasoned demon slayer who’s good at his job, and he juxtaposes tanjirou very well in that aspect

my only complaint is not directly in this fight itself but how nezuko is handled throughout the story as a whole

like bro, it is literally never explained why nezuko is different from demons

could have been easily explained if maybe her family’s ghosts like slapped her hand every time she wanted to eat a person but nope

she’s just built different lol

so yeah youll see future ratings get points docked off bc nezuko unlocks some secret power with no prior explanation other than she angy >:3

VS TEMPLE DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of a demon. The demon has a sharp-nailed hand over his neck and there are four text bubbles around him saying “But a wound like this... will heal in no time! See? The bleeding already stopped!” End Image Description.]

10/10

may be more forgettable compared to like rui but still good

tanjirou did exceptionally well in this fight and his ability to think on his feet is once again beautifully illustrated here (trapping this dude’s head against the tree trunk with the axe)

very clever

again, establishes more demon worldbuilding regarding regeneration and still being able to move without their head

and the demons burning in the sunlight thing since nezuko wasn’t able to show that

the ending where tanjirou hesitates to kill the demon also serves to show his sympathetic nature towards demons that will last throughout the entirety of the first 60-ish chapters

:)

we’ll talk about what the hell happens to tanjirou after that

or not, it could honestly be its own post

VS HAND DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of a many-handed demon. He has six hands around him, three of them covering his mouth while he chuckles, two of them grabbing his cheeks, and one holding on to the top of his head. There are two text bubbles saying “That’s how many of Urokodaki’s students I have eaten! I’ve decided to kill all of his students!” End Image Description.]

10/10

ooooh probably the first big fight against a demon in the series

oh yeah not doing the two random demons tanjirou one shot in a single blow bc eh

anyways hand demon’s pretty goddamn scary, considering the fact that this is the 5th demon or whatever tanjirou has had to face so far

very nice way to show us how much tanjirou’s innate intuition and all his other random abilities (sense of smell, hard forehead) can come together and help him decapitate this guy

i liked the mini history with urokodaki this dude had and why he had beef with our favorite mentor figure, it establishes that urokodaki was in fact a super good demon slayer and its cool to see that actually shown

i also liked that small moment of compassion tanjirou gave this demon, staying consistent with tanjirou’s established kindness

the demon’s sad tale with killing his own brother very much humanizes him when all the reader has seen up to this point is that this guy is a monster who eats people

sets up the theme of demons just being humans but being victims of circumstance that unfortunately doesn’t hold up as well in arcs past mugen train

VS SWAMP DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kamado Tanjirou fighting off three horned demons as they appear from below. There is a spiky text bubble saying “Three of them!!!” End Image Description.]

10/10

not my most favorite fight but it still portrays everything alright and im not allowed to let my personal opinions mess with the rating so

i like how tanjirou mentioned the fact that he trained in conditions similar to the bog and explains how he pulled off the whirlpool form

using past experiences to aid him in the present, nice nice

tanjirou and nezuko dont quite work together very well but its yknow the first mission so ill chalk it up to simple inexperience

also the way the muzan curse thingie was hinted at here? fantastic way of showing that little bit of demon worldbuilding

...

oh god, it mentions nezuko being stronger than normal demons

ok its not a problem here per say since i can still suspend my disbelief, but later on it just becomes a glaring problem that gets worse over time

VS SUSAMARU AND YAHABA

[Image Description: Manga panels of Susamaru and Yahaba. The first one is a joyful Susamaru about to throw a temari ball. There is floating text saying “Is she one of Kibutsuji’s minions?!” The second image is an annoyed Yahaba, holding one of his eye-hands to cover himself. There are two text bubbles around him saying “My kimono got all dusty. Tch!” End Image Description.]

9/10

why dont these bitches have a good looking panel together dammit

anyways amazing entrance, the way yahaba used his hand eyes to track down tanjirou is really neat

the synergy yahaba and susamaru have is incredible, its awesome dude, they work extremely well together and it shows

tanjirou actually mixing his water breathing forms together is a god tier move and i absolutely love how he can show off his ability to think on his feet once again

establishing how yushiro’s bda works early on is really well done

establishing tamayo as a fugitive this early on is also super well done

not to get into spoiler territory but both these things pay off

how tamayo ended up defeating susamaru is literally awesome in so many ways

shows off both how smart she is by exploiting the muzan curse

and speaking of the muzan curse, we actually get to see what happens to demons who even say his name, back when it was hinted with the swamp demon

tamayo is amazing dude, and we get some real evidence of the horrible suffering demons go through if they even accidentally attempt to betray muzan :D

...

now heres what keeps this fight from being perfect

nezuko somehow grew stronger against susamaru’s temari

with no explanation

which could have been easily explained if tamayo was like “oh yeah the drug also boosts a demon’s strength temporarily”

but nope

god, i just dont like how gotouge handles nezuko’s power boosts throughout the series bc like i said before

no explanation is given anywhere

this is a huge issue, this isnt a pokemon game, you cant just kill demons and get exp at the end of every battle, level up, get some sweet stat bonuses and move on

(actually if gotouge established that this is how nezuko grew in power, than all my complaints about this would be gone, im not even joking)

anyways i get that nezuko is supposed to be “special” but thats too vague of a descriptor

how the hell is she special? ya gotta be more specific and stick with that explanation or that suspension of disbelief is going to disappear

VS TONGUE DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of a four-eyed demon with horns and a long tongue. He is crawling in an awkward position, one foot in front of his tilted head. There are two text bubbles around him saying “Heh, heh! I’ll slurpy slurp your brains out through you ear!” End Image Description.]

10/10

not much to say, showcases zenitsu’s true abilities really well

nicely done

VS HORNED DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of a big, single-horned demon. There are three text bubbles saying “You dodged! You’re awfully lively for a human! It’ll be a treat to carve away your flesh!” End Image Description.]

10/10

would have ignored this fight if not for the fact we havent seen inosuke fight before

it definitely shows how very fast-paced and wild inosuke is

no complaints here lol

VS KYOGAI

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kyogai, a demon with tsuzumi drums attached to his shoulders. There are four text bubbles around him saying “Why?! Why does everyone keep sneaking through my house? It’s so aggravating. It’s my prey! It’s my prey! Found in my territory!” End Image Description.]

10/10

establishes marechi blood pretty early on, once again expanding the worldbuilding of kny which is always cool

interesting terrain where it’s always shifting, tanjirou once again proves his ability to adapt really quickly by altering one of his forms to work with the turning room

(man, i wish the form mixing/form modification thing carried on throughout the rest of the story, but it really didnt which is just a shame)

the injuries tanjirou had prior to this mission actually affecting him was a nice touch

oh yeah, kyogai gives us more worldbuilding (which is always nice) regarding the 12 kizuki, and the aspect of him being cast out due to being weak shows a lot about muzan’s indifference towards his own demons if they arent strong

his backstory being a failed writer once again humanizes kyogai as a former human being and not just a monster

tanjirou shows his sympathy and compassion again by not stepping on his written work and complimenting his bda

well, tbh tanjirou’s actions kinda came out of nowhere but its a very minor thing and not enough to dock a point off, like it didnt affect the outcome of the fight that much if at all

(so if you see future battles where points are docked off for things not logically making sense, its bc whatever nonsensical concepts were integrated into the fight actually turned the tide of the battle and thats a big no-no)

very good fight and if you remember how kinda bad tanjirou was at accurately slicing the swamp demon, you can see that he’s already improved leaps and bounds

im so proud of him

VS MOTHER SPIDER DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kamado Tanjirou and the Mother Spider Demon. There is a light shining down from the top right on to the demon as Tanjirou slices her head off, rain following in his wake. There is floating text saying “Water Breathing: Fifth Form - Blessed Rain After the Drought!” around them. End Image Description.]

10/10

i mean does anyone disagree?

all the demon slayers getting their necks snapped by her threads was pretty horrific, probably more horrifying than anything else we have seen in the entire series if im gonna be honest

the death scene is probably the most beautiful one in the series

it reveals a water breathing form that we havent seen before thats the 5th form

as far as i know, no other breathing style has this merciful sword stroke so it shows a lot about the original water breather and what they might have been like

but enough about them, really the focus is on tanjirou bc this is like the best example by far of how kind and sympathetic he is to demons

dunno what else to say, its perfect

VS SON SPIDER DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of Agatsuma Zenitsu performing Thunder Breathing 1st Form: Sixfold on a spider-like demon. Zenitsu is crashing through the roof of a shed, and a zig-zag path is left behind. There are sound effects all over the panel, saying “Bam!” in large font. End Image Description.]

10/10

chose a picture without a huge spider on it bc i would like to not scare myself half to death

anyways extremely amazing fight, showcases zenitsu’s immense talent and skill, adapting the 1st form of thunder breathing to be a more versatile move

theres a moment where his backstory with kuwajima and kaigaku were revealed and his hidden insecurities are out in the open which is super nice and further develops a character weve only considered as comedic relief until now

the anime made the backstory scenes and the killing scene so much cooler

while there is no thematic connection between zenitsu and the demon, it really isnt necessary to keep this fight interesting

anyways another pretty much perfect fight

VS FATHER SPIDER DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kamado Tanjirou and Inosuke slashing at the Father Spider Demon. The demon has blocked Tanjirou’s sword with his arm, and Inosuke is slamming both his blades down on the demon’s other hand. End Image Description.]

10/10

again, not my most favorite fight but it does everything right

i do have to say it was excellent how gotouge hyped up the father spider demon to be the big bad, only just so the plot twist later takes the readers by surprise

nicely done

VS DAUGHTER SPIDER DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kochou Shinobu and the Daughter Spider Demon. Shinobu’s back is seen and her haori looks like a butterfly’s wings keeping her afloat as she holds her stinger blade out to the side. The demon looks surprised as blood gushes from her side, arm, shoulder, chest, neck, and forehead. There is floating text on the panel, saying “Insect Breathing - Butterfly Dance - Caprice!” End Image Description.]

10/10

first time weve seen shinobu and her fighting style

what i love most about this is how much it shows her true character, appearing as a carefree and naive individual so she seems underwhelming

then bam, reveals exactly how dangerous and uncaring she is of demons, listing out the specific ways she would torture the daughter spider demon in grotesque detail

her using poison to take demons by surprise is also super clever and brings back the worldbuilding established way earlier about wisteria being poisonous to demons

amazing integration of that concept

anyways this fight really encapsulates who shinobu is as a character and thats why it gets a perfect score

VS RUI

[Image Description: Manga panel of Rui holding his hand out directly towards the viewer. There are two text bubbles around him, saying “Give me your sister. If you hand her over quietly, I’ll spare your life.” End Image Description.]

8/10

not only is it a super scary fight but there is a deeper conflict between rui and tanjirou, what it means to be family

they are opposites in the sense that while tanjirou believes love is what makes a family, rui’s subconscious desperation for an unbreakable bond drives him to use fear to keep his “family” together

excellent juxtaposition of their values, and this is only further emphasized when rui expresses out loud what he was going to do to nezuko

i also like the symbolism regarding rui’s bda, how he uses threads or the “familial” bonds to cut up his fake family with it if they act out of turn or annoy him

super neat detail

alright what i dont like about this fight is nezuko (again)

mostly her unlocking her bda to turn the tide of the battle bc her mom was like “yo, wake up, your brother is going to be killed”

feels... forced ig

her bda in general is confusing and not consistent

man, i wish i could make a stronger argument for this but i do believe the problem stems from the fact that we dont ever know what nezuko is thinking, and what she thinks of tanjirou specifically

if she even cares for him as a sibling or if shes only going along with what her family is saying to her, things like that which would have been fixed if gotouge actually gave her thoughts some screen time

so the action feels pretty shallow

im also conflicted over tanjirou somehow remembering how dance of the fire god works

on one hand, hes using past information and applying it in the current setting so he doesnt die, which is understandable

but on the other hand, this was a teeny bit random?

i think what could have fixed this is if there was a scene in the beginning of the series where tanjirou was performing it himself, like practicing before he actually had to do it for new years

so that when the rui fight rolls around, it would have felt less like throwing dry spaghetti at a wall

but yeah

overall super good fight, giyuu ending up having to kill rui instead of tanjirou was super good in that tanjirou didnt become a pillar this early in the series and to show how strong giyuu is

there are some odd bits regarding the ultimate “beheading” of rui using nezuko and tanjirous supposed bonds but it doesnt kill the fight entirely so it deserves its pretty high score

***under read more is manga-only fights so beware***

VS ENMU

[Image Description: Manga panel of Enmu holding his hand out directly at the viewer, with a mouth on the back of it. There is floating text to the top right of Enmu that says “Whispers of Forced Unconscious Hypnosis!” End Image Description.]

9/10

id say this fight is definitely overshadowed by the dream stuff prior to this but its pretty good in its own right

enmu fusing with the train was kinda confusing, like when was it established that demons could fuse with objects?

this worldbuilding element doesnt even appear again so yeah thats why it loses a point

how the kmbk gang end up defeating enmu is pretty sweet though, tanjirou using dance of the fire god to sever the neck bone was really nice and shows that him using the breathing style in the rui fight wasnt a one time thing

while kyojuro’s role was smaller in this part, the next part makes up for it so i cant complain

anyways ye, almost perfect score but its pretty good

VS AKAZA (MUGEN TRAIN)

[Image Description: Manga panel of Akaza holding his hand out to the viewer’s left. There is a text bubble saying “Why don’t you become a demon?” End Image Description.]

10/10

this encounter is literally amazing okay?

after the crew kills the big bad, it seems like everything is fine

but plot twist, upper moon 3 appears out of nowhere

this is the first time the reader has seen an upper moon, let alone the 3rd/4th strongest demon in existence and the way gotouge handled this twist is fucking amazing

kyojuro’s death scene really shows just how human even the strongest pillars are against demons with incredible power

its just

amazing

VS OBI DEMON

[Image Description: Manga panels of the obi-like demon. The first image shows the obi hung in the air and strung over each other like decorations, with women-shaped patterns in its folds. The second image is Hashibira Inosuke fighting the Obi demon which now has lips and eyes. There is floating text in that panel saying “Breath of the Beast: Sixth Fang - Jagged Gnaw!!” End Image Description.]

10/10

on to red light district

this fight is admittedly super forgettable and not very interesting at least compared to the main fight with daki and gyutaro

but it wraps up the sub plot of the women and uzui’s wives going missing so it gets a perfect score for not messing that up

oh and it establishes the stretchy neck thing daki has going on which is very good

VS DAKI AND GYUTARO

[Image Description: Manga panel of Daki and Gyutaro. Daki is sitting on Gyutaro’s shoulders. There is a text bubble on the top right that says “The two of us are one, after all.” as well as floating text that reads “The power of the irregular siblings...!? Next issue lead color and the fight reaches its climax!!” End Image Description.]

8/10

love how this battle challenges tanjirou’s sympathy and kindness towards demons, just simply bc daki and gyutaro are horrible people

(too bad nothing came of this, which ill explain in the hantengu portion)

daki and gyutaro are very good villains and kept this fight super interesting from start to finish

uzui acting as a foil to gyutaro is nicely integrated and properly shown with how jealous gyutaro gets over seeing uzui’s perfect form and stature

tanjirou not only mixes forms but mixes breathing styles as well, which is so fucking awesome

(too bad it was only used like once throughout the entire series, its quite unfortunate)

the super high tension right after inosuke gets stabbed and tanjirou wakes up was expertly portrayed and handled, it felt like the kmbk gang and uzui were actually going to lose

super awesome

the tanjirou and gyutaro parallels are expertly portrayed, with how gyutaro taunts tanjirou over failing to protect his little sister, and the more visual thing where tanjirou imagined his own neck underneath his blade, that was super duper nice

the ending is extremely tense and emotionally gripping, gotouge did a really good job with that artistically too

the demon mark acquisition scene was surprisingly not frustrating, considering that it wasnt really explained prior to the battle

i do think it has to do with how it was explained later just exactly how they worked so its not just some random thing gotouge pulled out of their ass

so pretty good

/

what i dont like is nezuko and her full power demon form

first of all where the fuck did that come from? she just got angry and suddenly shes as powerful as an upper moon

like

how?

that doesnt make sense???

her extremely quick regeneration makes no sense

her ability to manipulate her blood’s properties makes no sense

and it doesnt even appear again so what was the point of that existing

none of this is even explained later which annoys me

that one part where tanjirou sings a lullaby to her to calm her down was alright ig but nezuko in this fight makes me extremely irritated and frustrated

just ugh

VS HANTENGU

[Image Description: Manga panel of Hantengu opening a shoji door. He is crawling inside, his hand in a gnarled, unnatural position. There is a text bubble saying “Eeeeeeek.” End Image Description.]

1/10

swordsmith village

this fight can go fuck itself /j

no but seriously it has so many problems that it would be shorter to name its redeeming qualities (which ill do later)

first off, the nezuko full power form thing again

i hate it so much with a passion

again, where did her ability to regenerate instantly even come from???? this is never explained, ever

and why did she cut herself on tanjirou’s sword anyway

did she somehow know that it was going to turn red if she burned it?

gotouge what the fuck, there is literally no reason why nezuko would do that and we cant even read her mind to see her thought process

gotouge hates nezuko, i swear

/

remember when i said uzui is meant to be a foil to gyutaro in the rld fight? its pretty obvious that those two are opposites, it was nicely done

... what the hell does mitsuri’s insecurities about strength have to do with whatever the fuck hantengu has going on (which is basically nothing)?

so no meaningful connection between mitsuri and hantengu

theres no meaningful connection between tanjirou and hantengu other than tanjirou getting pissed off for like the second time

also tanjirou’s thing with being kind and sympathetic to demons was entirely dropped at this point

but instead of it leading up to a corruption arc of some sorts, it just doesnt

like honestly if something actually came of that anger he exhibited in this arc and from red light district from this point forward story-wise, i would have counted this as an amazing writing decision

but it literally doesnt so who cares

(god, i really start to hate what happened to his character after this )

and genya’s revealed motivation also doesnt fit at all with hantengu’s thing, he’s not a foil, not a parallel, nothing, there is nothing

/

tanjirou being the catharsis for development for mitsuri and muichirou, who he has only talked to like twice

theres definitely a better way to handle those two’s developments without his help

like gotouge, you have a big cast of characters, use them lol

/

i want to kick hantengu in the face for being boring as fuck (at least his clones have cool looking weapons)

doesnt even have a proper backstory, just a single spread of him being blamed for shit as a human

like... thats it? this is upper moon 4 what the hell

/

theres no clever form mixing here at all (regarding tanjirou) which probably would have helped with foreshadowing the 13th form for dance of the fire god/sun breathing better

also gotouge established that as tanjirou’s thing and now he doesnt do that stuff anymore which sucks

/

oh hey remember when tanjirou actually learned how to do zenitsu’s speed boost thing?

if you didnt, i dont blame you bc it literally doesnt appear again, ever

you could argue that he adapted it into his “waltz flash” technique or whatever the fuck that is but the way it was integrated into this fight was like throwing dry spaghetti at a wall

which is just a shame bc its meant to be representative of how tanjirou and zenitsu are good pals but the way it was utilized is forgettable as hell

/

i absolutely loathe the crimson blade concept as a whole and im mentioning this now bc its going to come into play why future instances where this goddamn thing comes up again causes points to be lost

its inconsistent as fuck ill tell you that

/

at least some yoriichi stuff appeared here and not shoved into the final battle with everything else

so the yoriichi stuff later didnt come out of absolute nowhere

genya and mitsuri’s unique fighting styles expand the kny worldbuilding just a little more which is always nice

tanjirou got a cool sword out of this which would have been cooler if him and yoriichi had a deeper connection that was actually explored

but we didnt get shit so whatever

other people getting demon marks being revealed here is also okay so that again, the final battle isnt filled with absolutely everyone getting their marks at once

demon marks have their own slew of problems but its not as bad as the fucking crimson sword shit

god i hate the crimson sword shit

...

dude this section needs a tldr, even i cant sit and read through my shit

TL;DR - this fight sucks and crimson swords are bullshit (more on this later)

VS GYOKKO

[Image Description: Manga panel of Tokitou Muichirou and Gyokko. Muichirou is looking to the left while Gyokko is looking to the right, both with their backs to each other. There are mist clouds billowing in the foreground and background, as well as a slash mark going across Gyokko’s neck. End Image Description.]

7/10

this fight suffers from the same lack of cohesive themes through characters like the hantengu battle bc the antagonist is given nothing

but its better

we havent actually seen mui fight before so theres no consistencies that the reader has to keep track of for now

and there arent like 10 characters in the fight so this fight gets a lot of points just for being a lot more coherent

i do like that this fight shows just how good mui is that he can defeat an upper moon by himself

mui’s backstory is neat

gyokko’s bda is very interesting too

... thats pretty much it lol

ye, anyways not the best fight but not the worst fight either

VS KAIGAKU

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kaigaku holding the hilt of his blade with one hand. There is two text bubbles around him, saying “...As usual, you’re still shabby. It’s been a while, Zenitsu.” End Image Description.]

9/10

alright on to final battle arc

theres some good fights and then some really sucky ones, but this one was pretty incredible and very emotionally charged

theres a clear reason why zenitsu and kaigaku are battling each other (kai betrayed the corps and inadvertantly caused the only parental figure in zenitsu’s life to die, and zenitsu is rightfully pissed off about that)

the visual yin-yang symbolism is awesome too

zenitsu winning due to using the 7th form he created himself (which i have reason to believe was inspired by tanjirou) was the perfect ending to the fight, really couldnt ask for anything better and is a perfect example of how much of an effect tanjirou has had on zenitsu

the 7th form is what tanjirou’s waltz flash should have been lol

/

what keeps this fight from being absolutely perfect is lack of development prior to this conflict

(since the final battle arc is basically a culmination of all the hinted developments through the series, im going to actually factor in how much and how well these conflicts were foreshadowed)

anyways if we had actually seen zenitsu, kaigaku, and kuwajima actually interacting with each other and showing how they were essentially a family (not just through flashbacks), it would have made zenitsu placing the responsibility of killing kai onto himself a lot more tragic

but like, apart from brief flashbacks where zenitsu actually met kaigaku off screen and that one thing all the way back in natagumo where both kuwajima and kai were introduced, thats pretty much it in terms of thunder family development

so yeah its underdeveloped for sure

also one random thought, i personally think zenitsu should have gotten his demon mark in this fight, it would have been cool to see

VS AKAZA (INFINITY FORTRESS)

[Image Description: Manga panel of Akaza’s face. There are two text bubbles around him, saying “Okay, let’s get started. It’s time for the feast.” There is also floating text saying “The inspection of the strong has begun...” as well as a simple box on the lower left, denoting its the end of chapter 147. End Image Description.]

6/10

oh god please dont hate me for this

ill list the good things first how about that

this conflict was foreshadowed perfectly in mugen train, you bet the readers were expecting a tanjirou vs akaza battle after the death of kyojuro and gotouge delivered

akaza’s power is shown extremely well with how many close calls tanjirou and giyuu had while fighting him

akaza eventually giving up on his own volition was really nice and fit into the context of the battle very very well, like sure tanjirou and giyuu wouldnt understand why he gave up but us readers do know

akaza is a really good character and a good villain

/

now notice how im only mentioning akaza and not giyuu or tanjirou in the good aspects

bc those two are eh

no form mixing at all from either tanjirou and giyuu

i know i said form mixing was kind of tanjirou’s thing but you’d think giyuu would have gotten more creative with his moves once akaza said that he was getting predictable

(well he said he “ran out of water breathing forms” but same thing)

so its kinda bland lol

speaking of giyuu, his whole thing with his insecurities of being weak wasnt handled well (it was sort of immediately brushed off in pillar training, and its unclear what part of his character arc he was in)

like sure him announcing that he’s going to protect tanjirou is cool but it feels like he was haphazardly dropped into the tanjirou and akaza conflict

isnt he supposed to be both their foils? that wasnt really explored that well in this fight and theres no deep meaning behind him even being here just analyzing what he did in it

he could have been handled better or even given more focus is what im saying

the anatta state came out of nowhere, im sorry okay? just bc inosuke like barely hinted at not being able to sense grandma hisa bc she had no fighting spirit and tanjurou magically taught his son how to achieve this state doesnt mean it was properly integrated into the fight

if the anatta state was actually explored prior to this battle, i would have given it a pass but it just feels like a cheap and poorly developed trick to get around akaza’s technique development (which is overpowered as fuck might i add)

gotouge should have just given akaza a plausible weakness to his technique development instead, especially since they dont use or even mention the anatta state after this

the transparent world shit makes no sense but ill elaborate on that in the koku battle analysis

oh and this thing doesnt affect the score but why wasnt there a “yoriichi visage overlapping” moment when tanjirou was fighting akaza? hes an upper moon, he should have gotten those visions but he didnt

for some reason

anyways this battle was alright and has good set up but the middle and end parts didnt hold up as well bc random concepts were thrown at us without prior explanation or development

VS DOUMA

[Image Description: Manga panel of Douma licking Shinobu’s butterfly pin. There are two text bubbles around him saying “Anyway, tonight is a good night. Such fine feasts keep showing up one after another.” End Image Description.]

9/10

damn, such an amazing fight

the build up to this was properly foreshadowed

shinobu finally showing her true anger after hiding it for so long is amazing

douma is a super interesting character and fantastic villain

shinobu showing off her true power and determination against douma was sooooo nice

shinobu’s poisonous body plan is so clever and so interesting

if i was to rate the shinobu part of the fight alone, it would have gotten a 10/10 no question

the reason why its knocked down a point is because of the kanao and inosuke part

dont get me wrong, the way kanao is able to hold her own against douma by herself is pretty cool, how shes meant to parallel douma with their similar struggles surrounding human emotions and demonstrate how she has grown as a person, how she regains the ability to cry

that shit is cool, inosuke also getting in touch with his emotions after learning what happened to his mom was super neat as well

however

bc this battle takes place in the final arc with everything else, there wasnt proper build up regarding many things, the kotoha reveal especially

so inosuke feels kinda forced into the kanao shinobu and douma conflict, similar to how giyuu felt forced into the tanjirou and akaza conflict

its quite unfortunate bc if the kotoha stuff was actually explored prior to the confrontation, this “forced” feeling would have disappeared

i know some people have suggested that the douma fight should have just been its own arc, and i very much agree, it would have certainly helped fix this problem regarding inosuke and kotoha

last random thought, i wish shinobu, kanao, and inosuke got their demon marks

VS KOKUSHIBOU

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kokushibou looking directly at the viewer, holding the hilt of his blade as if he’s going to pull it out. There are text boxes around him saying “This... is Upper Moon One... He’s so different compared to the other Upper Moons. He looks so dignified and majestic.” The text boxes are narrated by Tokitou Muichirou. End Image Description.]

5/10

this fight is... mediocre

at least theres a more tangible connection between muichirou and kokushibou

even though that was handled kinda poorly

tbh there really was no point to revealing that mui is koku’s descendant like at all, it just had no significant bearing to the plot of the fight

sanemi’s backstory being here is... okay ig?

idk the whole shinazugawa conflict has fundamental problems that i just cant think of any other place to put it without changing the entirety of canon

the marechi blood concept coming back was nice though

genya is there

him getting his bda was cool and helped turn the tide of the battle in a satisfying way (before kicking the bucket but thats not the focus here)

gyomei is a hollow husk of a character who barely got anything at all

but his fighting style is extremely cool and conveys his immense power very well

oh and him and sanemi are amazing at working together, like better than giyuu and tanjirou, and better than kanao and inosuke

theyre that good yet pretty much nobody acknowledges it which is sad

koku himself is pretty interesting and pretty tragic, very nice villain

but everyone together?

gonna be honest but this is such a random collection of characters, there was basically no foreshadowing that these four were going to go up again kokushibou, they are not that connected very well

i know there was this one post that focused on the theme of family that was common in all 5 characters in the fight but its just not enough

it would have been more cohesive if gotouge emphasized gyomei, mui, sanemi, and genya being like different aspects of yoriichi coming together to kill kokushibou hundreds of years after yoriichi failed to kill him

lmao its not like the 4 of them defeated koku with the power of family or friendship, they just smacked him over and over with a flail, shot him with magical bullets, and stabbed a crimson sword into his abdomen

wouldnt have been too hard to switch over to koku’s pov and go “damn these bitches are like my stupid brother”

...

speaking of crimson swords

i fucking hate the crimson sword concept oh my god can i complain about it now? im gonna complain about it now

unlike demon marks, the crimson blades werent even given any proper conditions, you just hold the stupid thing hard enough and it somehow imbues it with magical properties with no logic behind those properties

what part of crimson swords completely destroys a demon’s body in an instant? even muzan didnt go through that process when he was almost killed by yoriichi so where in the goddamn fuck did it come from

it could be explained bc the sword was left in the same spot for a long time but this tactic doesnt even appear again in a meaningful way (didnt kill muzan when tanjirou and giyuu held the sword together) so what the fuck was the point of having this even exist

its so underdeveloped and confusing and i hate it

the transparent world stuff is also confusing as shit and its pretty much never explained how they work aside from the vague “close your mind” advice, like why did it exist, it did nothing to help the present day demon slayers

its just so... poorly integrated

yeah anyways this is around the same rating as the akaza fight but a little worse bc there wasnt that strong set up beforehand

VS KOKUSHIBOU (SENGOKU ERA)

[Image Description: Manga panel of a bag getting ripped open, pieces of a wooden flute tumbling out. End Image Description.]

10/10

easily 10/10

this fight shows the tragedy of kokushibou giving in to his envy and hatred, when yoriichi cries over seeing his own family commit terrible attrocities against the people he wanted to protect

and yoriichi dies, now carrying the fact that he couldnt even save his own brother from the influence of muzan on his conscious forever

what a sad ending for yoriichi

and after koku angrily slashes apart yoriichi’s corpse, having him find and keep the flute he gave to him when they were kids to the present day gives him a small shred of humanity in the midst of his monstrous anger

VS NAKIME

[Image Description: Manga panels of Nakime. The first one shows a low quality version of her playing her biwa. The second one is a close up of her eye. There are spiky text bubbles saying “It’s Upper Rank... 4!” End Image Description.]

0/10

no nakime backstory

not even a goddamn fight

forgettable

useless

VS MUZAN

[Image Description: Manga panel of Kibutsuji Muzan in his white-haired, mouth-covered form. There are text bubbles around him saying “Not a single one was of use to me. I will crush the demon hunters tonight. I’ll massacre them all right now.” End Image Description.]

1/10

._.

i have many complaints but ill try my best to not make this another hantengu rant section lol

first off, obanai deserved better

im serious, this poor dude was forgotten until pretty much the end when we finally get a backstory out of him

and then he died

what a waste of a potentially amazing character

mitsuri getting taken out early was ehhh

pretty sure someone else made a post about her supposedly being extremely strong but she was nerfed in this battle which i agree with

literally none of the pillars work together very well, like remember how i praised sanemi and gyomei for being super coordinated? lmao that doesnt exist anymore

you could say this is caused by desperation though and you wouldnt be wrong, its just boring to sit through

that causes issues bc this now basically requires the crimson sword and transparent world concepts to be there to spice things up

but in this fight, they do nothing in the long run (except for tanjirou using the crimson sword at the very very end)

youve already heard me talk about why those two things are super shittily integrated and i cant be bothered repeating myself so moving on

kanao, inosuke, and zenitsu

they... exist? they didnt do much tbh, which i guess is the point but like, now its boring again

nezuko could have been used as a potential way to raise the stakes and make things interesting again (like “ah shit, muzan might actually be unkillable if he gets nezuko but its okay bc shes not here- oh fuck shes here this is not good”)

but nothing came of her running off except confirmation that she became human again so whatever

uzui and shinjuro are useless, why werent they at the fight?

like they could have followed nezuko and contributed to the battle even a little but they just didnt and now theres literally no point to them appearing in this arc at all

wasted potential

tanjirou

i wish him going absolutely apeshit had actual substance behind it, like it being a part of his character arc or something

i remember having this one theory that he had a corruption arc (due to dropping his kindness thing towards demons) and i wanted this to be true so badly

but it doesnt exist

not with how the series ended

god

the only thing that saves this fight from being complete trash is tamayo’s poison thing being amazingly executed

and the part where everyone got blasted away, losing limbs and shit, that made things a little more interesting again

but thats it

VS MUZAN (SENGOKU ERA)

[Image Description: Manga panels of Kibutsuji Muzan, Tamayo, and Tsugikuni Yoriichi. The first one has Muzan and Tamayo, while the second one has Yoriichi pulling out his sword. There are text boxes saying “And the moment I met him, I understood that I was born into this world to defeat this man.” End Image Description.]

9/10

finally something good again

while short, that’s just the nature of all of yoriichi’s battles with demons

anyways pretty nice, theres a clear reason why this battle exists (shows the scenario that made the original breather get super close to defeating muzan in detail)

adding tamayo here was a nice touch

my only complaint is that it seemed extremely coincidental that yoriichi somehow developed a breathing style specifically countering muzan’s multiple organs without even knowing prior that he had all those brains and hearts floating around freely in his body

like thats kind of ridiculous, even for yoriichi whos supposed to be “blessed by the gods”

could just be me though

VS TANJIROU

[Image Description: Manga panels of Kamado Tanjirou in his demon form. The first image has his eyes closed. The second image has his eyes opened and the tumor on his face almost completely faded. There are text boxes around him saying “You will destroy the demon hunters in my stead.” End Image Description.]

1/10

hoo boy

ok first off, demon tanjirou lasted for 2 chapters

thats it

2 chapters

so thats already a problem

i am aware its meant to parallel the beginning of the series but also its ridiculous how completely vague and rushed this entire thing was

nezuko doesnt do shit through not just this battle but this entire arc which i already explained so not gonna go into it further

kanao magically having a demon cure on her made very little sense

the scene where tanjirou leaves muzan in purgatory is pretty but if you look at it in the context of everything else, its ambiguous and confusing

(if someone could explain it and see how it connects to the original theme of “demons just being victims of circumstance,” i would love to hear it)

/

actually you know what makes me so mad about this “fight” as a whole? there was so much potential to do more with this concept

and im not talking about him escaping and nezuko becoming a demon slayer roleswap au (even though its a pretty cool concept)

him becoming a demon could have been a metaphor for his lost kindness and sympathy towards demons halfway through the series

it could have been a punishment for letting his anger towards muzan cloud his judgement

it could have symbolized literally anything about him losing his humanity as he got stronger

but those three things are just scenarios from my head, they dont exist in this series just based off of what weve seen from these two chapters

its disappointing

the only thing keeping this from getting a 0 is the one part where inosuke couldnt chop off tanjirou’s head bc he cared about him too much

that at least shows inosuke had grown as a character

everything else is just meaningless and convoluted garbage and “convoluted” is not what you should be aiming for if this is supposed to be the ending of your series

IN SUMMARY

early kny is very good, later kny is questionable and the ending is just a mess of wasted potential and disappointment

i get why gotouge had to have the transparent world ability, crimson blade ability, and the demon marks appear before they all appeared on yoriichi but theyre all just so underdeveloped and terribly handled in the battles they are used, it makes me want to kick a wall

like lmao, i could literally think of so many ways they could have been properly integrated, hell, im even writing a whole goddamn rewrite using my ideas for these three things (link to that is in my pinned)

just, god

if you want to debate over these ratings, my ask box is open ig? idk

#kny #kimetsu no yaiba #kny meta #demon slayer #my writing #long post

[casualotptrash]

Fixes to the Persona Series- Social Links

This was originally going to be the whole point 6 in my Fixes to the Persona Series post, but it was basically the same length as points 1-5 combined so I didn’t want to make the post mega-huge.

Link to the whole post about this topic.

(Spoilers for a lot of P3 things, including the plot and second awakenings) 

I’ll start off with this point, something that needs to be fixed for all of the games is that you shouldn’t only get social link points for saying what the person wants to hear. I get the train of thought that if you say what they want to hear they will like you more, but that’s not how real friendships work? Obviously you shouldn’t be saying something that offends them and think it will raise your points, but sometimes people just need to hear things?

I can think of three standout examples: Nozomi in P3 (Gourmet King), Mishima in P5, and Shinya in P5. Nozomi’s link is a hot mess in of itself, but it was very frustrating to at one point just be like “Hey can you chill?” when he’s trying to induct you into a scam/cult or whatever, and it reverses the social link. Like ok buddy fuck you too, I was just trying to say no and that you need to stop scamming people?? For Mishima in P5 (I’ll go more in depth on him in a later post), it’s just kind of strange that you can clearly see him starting to obsess about the PT’s but you can’t really tell him he needs to stop until the social link demands it. Even then, the only way to get points is pretty much to go “Wow Mishima, you’re the best! You’re the reason we exist! We love you!!!” and it just feels kind of wrong. Shinya’s is very much along the same line as that, except you basically have to do something even worse and encourage him to keep being a bully? Thankfully P5 doesn’t reverse confidants, but I probably would have done so with Shinya because I kept telling him he shouldn’t bully others until I realized how to get points with him. It just feels wrong to encourage such behavior until the character suddenly realizes they’ve been acting wrong. No shit, I’ve been trying to say that.

I think social links need quite the fix to them, but this is definitely one of them. Strong, real relationships are not just built upon telling the other person what they want to hear. 

Now I’m going to go into the structure of how social links are made and how they affect the characters. I have so much to say about this it’s not even funny. There are two major parts to this, but the second heavily ties into the first, so I’ll just go through them one at a time while trying to make sense.

The first part is that, simply put, integral character growth should not be tied to social links. The completion/tipping point of a character’s growth seems to be signified by their second awakening taking place. For example, in P3, all of the cast members awaken after a big event happens in game which causes them to grow. Most of this is them learning how to move on past the deaths of their loved ones, but still the idea remains the same. The game still has some pretty significant social links with party members too, so it’s not like the social links really suffered from this. In fact, I would say it made the social links even better, and it did this by fleshing out the characters further.

For this example, I’m going to use Akihiko’s growth from the story and social link in P3P because I feel like I know it quite well and it’s one of the best examples of this.

In the main story, it’s clear that Akihiko has a couple of problems. He’s quick to fight, reckless with his own health, and cant let go of the past. Along with these traits, he also cares very much about his friends. He considers Tartarus to be a training ground, is actually injured for the first few months of the game, scolds the MC, Junpei, and Yukari a bit for going out to the alleyway (where Shinji saved them) because it was dangerous, and desparately wants Shinji to rejoin SEES. Him and Shinji, on multiple occasions, talk about the incident where Shinji killed Ken’s mother. Akihiko says that Shinji needs to let go of the past, and Shinji echoes the same sentiment back at him.

What all of these problems step from is the death of his sister, Miki. They were both young and orphans, along with Shinji, and one day during a fire Shinji held Akihiko back from running back into the burning building. Inside the burning building was Miki, who Akihiko was trying to get to, and sadly she died in the fire (I’m pretty sure all of this isn’t revealed until P3P with his social link, but in any version of the game we find out that Miki is dead). Because of this, he felt powerless and from then on strived to be powerful enough to save those around him, which is why he’s obsessed with training to such a degree that he doesn’t care about personal harm to himself.

All of this eventually comes to a head when Shinji dies in the story, and Akihiko isn’t able to save him. At a memorial for his death, Akihiko says this:

“I was too obsessed with power. Ever since I lost Miki, that's all I've cared about. I thought that if I was strong enough, I could protect anyone. But I was wrong... And now You're gone too... I'm such an idiot. In battle, there's always a chance of dying... I knew that! But I was so focused on fighting that I didn't notice anything else! It didn't matter how tough I was! Look what happened!”

He cries for his friend, and then is reminded that this is not what Shinji would want. He would want him to keep living his life, and finally let go of the ghosts of his past. So, this is what he does. At that point, his character growth basically reaches its climax and he awakens to Caesar. This all happens in the main story of the game.

Now, how did they decide to do his social link in P3P? Personally, I think it was genius. Due to all of that growth being integral to the main story, they could not just take it out and shove it into a social link. They had to find another thing to make the social link about, and instead of making it about something pointless they connect it to the main growth in the game. (Note, this social link is only available in the FeMC route)

In general, what his social link is about mirrors his growth in the main story a lot. In the beginning, he treats the MC with an overwhelming sense of care, almost to a condescending degree. You’re always going out to eat, him saying how much you need to eat to grow strong, and jogging/running with him. Taking out the more romantic parts of the social link (although they are *chefs kiss*), eventually it progresses to the point where he asks you if you can stop being the field leader of SEES. Of course, he immediately takes this back and laments that you couldn’t just do that. You have the option to question if he thinks you arent good enough for the job, and he quickly says that the MC is capable, and he didn’t mean to imply that you werent, but he doesn’t want you to be in danger. The social link is frozen after this, as Akihiko doesn’t know how to balance his overwhelming worry and concern about the MC being hurt.  

After Shinji’s death, the social link continues and he reveals the event of Miki’s death. At one point even says he feels like he doesn’t deserve to live because she died. It’s a very sad event, but because of his resolution from the main story with Shinji’s death he is able to open up to the MC. In the end, he comes to the conclusion that he’ll never get over the anger and sadness he feels for his sister’s death, and he accepts that she is dead, but he feels guilty because he wanted to ask you to bear this burden with him. He also starts to wonder what his feelings toward the MC mean, because he is very conflicted, and admits he might be seeing Miki in you (hence the overwhelming protecting nature he has for you in the link, and slightly condescending big-brother tendencies).

In his rank 9, he admits that he was tired of losing what was important to him. He thought that it would be better not to let things get too important, rather than risk losing them. He realizes this is wrong, and says he now knows he needs to work to protect everything precious from him. If the romance route was taken then he sees you as a precious loved one, while if the romance route is not taken he likens you to the status of Miki, aka a precious sister to him.

As you can see from the synopsis, a lot of what was in the social link is directly tied into his main growth in the story, however it is also not integral to his main growth. It stems off of it, not the other way around. Whoever made the extra social links in P3P did an amazing job at doing this exact thing, perhaps because they couldn’t change the growth in the main story. Either way, it’s a perfect example of how social links should be done.

If you’re interested in watching the growth from the social link directly, here is the link: Akihiko social link rank 1-10

You might be thinking, how is this issue really that big of a problem? Akihiko was a great character before his P3P social link, so if the growth is there either way (in story or social link) then it should be fine. My answer to this is in short, as the series progressed from P3 this problem got worse to the point where it negatively impacts the characters. The reason this got worse and impacts the characters so much, especially with the ones from P5, is because of the nature of how social links are set up. Obviously, social links are optional. They have to be, because not everyone is going to finish all of them in one run. This presents the unique issue of needing to make social links meaningful, but also not necessary. I would think anyone who reads that sentence would immediately understand how those two things do not mix well, especially when almost all of the important character growth is pushed into the social link. I’ll be using the social links (party members specifically) in P5 as my example to illustrate this because they’re the best for this.

At the very best, party member confidants in P5 feel like they contribute a good bit of character development alongside the story (on the surface). At the very worst, confidants in P5 feel like they actively contradict the story. Ann is probably the best example of this, but it happens to the rest of the main cast too, to varying degrees. I’m not as familiar with Ann’s confidant as Akihiko’s, but I’m going to try and do my best.

Essentially, Ann’s confidant is about finding her passion, becoming a stronger person, and overcoming her guilt. Outside of the occasional discussions about Shiho, how strong she is, and Ann discussing how she needs to become strong for her, one of the main things you do in the confidant is help Ann use various methods to be a better model (because she comes to the conclusion that she wants to be serious about modeling, her hobby, since Shiho is trying so hard to get back to her normal life). I have played Persona 5 vanilla twice, and Royal twice, and every time I have completed Ann’s confidant. That being said, it’s kind of sad that I could do it four times and barely remember the “becoming a stronger person” and “overcoming her guilt” part of it (outside of Ann saying Shiho is strong, and Ann asking us to insult her to make her stronger). She does have a very good conclusion with Shiho, and it’s is really sweet to see them hug on the roof and everything, but other than that the main outcome of the confidant is that Ann is going to really try for her modeling career and needs to change her habits because of this. Some of those habits she changes is by eating less junk food, exercising, etc.

Here’s where the issue comes in. You go through this whole confidant and have Ann come to that conclusion, and then throughout multiple scenes (and the rest of the story) Ann adheres to none of it. It’s the most whiplash I’ve ever experienced when one day Ann says she’s going to cut the sweets, and then the next something happens in game and she’s just chowing down on all of the food. To be clear, I do not care if Ann is eating a lot of a little in the grand scheme of things. Like I said, this is just an example that illustrates the total tonal dissonance present from the social link to the main story.

The whole reason this occurs is because, like I said earlier, the confidant has to be meaningful but not necessary to the plot. This is a major problem when pretty much the whole reason for her character growth, the plot with Shiho, is in the confidant. No matter if you do the confidant or not, in the story the characters will always act as if the confidant plot has not happened at all...because they physically cannot write it into the main story as it is optional. The reason this worked with Akihiko was because he had his main growth outside of the social link, and the social link tied into his growth, and the reason this doesn’t work for the P5 cast is because their growth is set up in the opposite way. Instead of tying their main growth in the story to the confidant, the story acts as a stepping stone for their main growth in story of the confidant.

I predict some people might read what I just said and counter with the point “You cant just expect their whole personalities to change,” and they would be right, if that was what I was explaining. It’s not. Obviously base personality traits are always going to be present, but the reason for having character growth is for the characters to grow. Futaba can always be more shy and timid around others, but if you go through her whole confidant where she learns to be more independent and then later on have her go somewhere and completely shut down? That is not growth. Her change can manifest in her being shy about going somewhere new, but adapting to it a lot quicker than she did before the confidant was completed. But, like I said, because of how the confidants are set up this is just not possible.

It took this long to get here, but we finally arrive at how the second point ties in. The second point is that, because of this issue with tying in integral growth with the social link, the characters end up being very one-note in the story (if you take out the inclusion of the social link). In my opinion, P3 doesn’t really suffer from this (although there still are bland characters in that game. Sometimes the writing is just not that exciting. Sorry Fuuka, you’re better in the spinoffs), P4 suffers from it a little (Teddie talking about girls 90% of the time, Yukiko laughing at everything, Meat Chie, etc.), and P5 has the most rampant cases of this.

This doesn’t mean that the characters are not well written, it just means that the game is going to be way more enjoyable if you are able to max everyone’s social link in comparison to only maxing a few. Putting aside the gameplay benefits, I usually love my NG+ runs more than my first run because it allows me to see all of the characters so much more.

I know that all of the characters could be shoved into stereotypical boxes if we had to, but we basically don’t need to for P5. If you do not do any confidants with party members in P5, tell me how many times Ryuji shows his remorseful and caring side for the trouble he has caused the track team in the main story. Oh wait, you can’t! He’s pushed around as the proverbial butt-monkey for almost the entire game, and at least Junpei and Yosuke got some deeper interaction with the story when they were in this role. If you only experience Ryuji from the main plot, you’d probably want to throttle him with how many times he ogles at Ann, argues with Morgana, tries to pick up girls, and shouts about being a Phantom Thief and wanting fame.

I will admit, they do have some deep moments here and there, when the main story calls for it, but other than that (again, without doing the social link) the PT’s kind of have as much characterization as a piece of cardboard. This is a big problem, especially when the cast is full of great characters! I played P5 4 times, and it still isn’t my favorite cast. There are some really good characters in there, but they just could not compare to the P3 cast for me (even though P3 was filled with a lot of highs and a lot of lows). Yukari was kind of a bitch and I didn’t like her for a long time, but at least I felt something! Poor Haru is just shoved off into a corner and characterized as the “team mom but would kill you, sad her father died, also has a crush on you” for the whole game unless you do her confidant.

Jury is still out on the P4 cast, because I see a little bit of what P3 had going on and what P5 does in them. Every time Yosuke is talking about something serious or profound I get really excited, only for it to be followed up with some dumb (usually homophobic) joke. I like the extra interactions the P4 cast has in comparison to P5, but even in those situations it feels like each member is kind of cast into their stereotypical role (Teddie want pussy, Yukiko laugh, Chie meat, etc.). I imagine once I do finish P4G and get to do my NG+ I will like the cast a lot more, but only because I will be able to do all of their social links.

Despite all of this, whether a character from the game has great growth or not, you can always count on Atlus to flanderize each character into their one “defining” (aka memed) trait to hell and back in any spinoff.

Sorry, don’t mind me crying in the corner with how Akihiko was massacred from a deep character into a protein junkie.

#long post #persona 3 #persona 3 portable #persona 4 #persona 5 #persona series #p3 #p3p #p4 #p5 #shush just shut the hell up about protein for five goddamn minutes #please god he only mentioned it once in p3 #maybe twice who knows #AND IT WAS COMPLETELY BY CHANCE TO SEE IT #Atlus why do you massacre your great characters #it's not funny anymore #I want d e p t h

[warmau]

★ donation request: rich kid!au hongseok

judging by the huge amount of applause that’s just come from outside of the gym

you assume that means that the star of this show has just arrived

other volunteers start running around, frazzled and worried

this one - yang hongseok - is known to be a bit of a,,,,,,,,handful

which you don’t understand 

the guys just another athlete like everyone else 

granted he has won an insane amount of titles in such a short amount of time

and is currently the world champion of his boxing class

(oh -  you know - is well on his way to being a self-made millionaire)

you just ,,,,, don’t get it

how can you be moody and snappy when your life revolves around punching people - like get your anger out in the ring, dude.

either way, scoring such a huge star for your charity work is amazing 

so you’re going to bend to his every will, even if you spend the majority of the time hating it

hongseok strolls in, followed by his manager - kino - who you spent most of your time talking to on the phone in order to set this up

you introduce yourself to him and shake his hand, he’s been nothing but nice 

your worry is all but focused on hongseok

your charity is all about working with kids and helping them get into free sports programs

which means a lot of the people in attendance are innocent children 

so you hope hongseok keeps it ,,,,,, together

he shakes your hand - but seems almost annoyed by it - taking the glasses he’s wearing off and chucking them toward kino

“how long is this gonna take?”

is the first thing he asks and you’re already gritting your teeth

“only half an hour, we want you to talk to the kids about how you got into boxing and then take some photo-”

“kino, did they say photo-op? i never agreed to that.”

kino looks like he’s gritting his teeth too, but he’s probably so used to the treatment that he just pats hongseok’s shoulder

“it’s only two or three photos. it’ll look so good for your publicity hong”

hongseok shrugs his hand off, but veers off toward the table where your volunteers have set up drinks

kino gives you an apologetic smile as he follows suit and you just stand there gripping the clipboard in your hands so hard you think you might break it

it’s only been 5 seconds and i already know - i hate him.

you turn you attention away from hongseok though, you’ve got to make sure the gym is prepped and the kids who’ve come out to hear hongseok speak are all here

as you pass by, you hear hongseok mutter something about how this place is subpar and hot 

you wish you could tell him to shut it, he’s an athlete - a little sweat won’t hurt him

but instead you remind yourself: you need this, and the kids need this.

when you’re done and you’re ready to introduce hongseok to the eager crowd

you walk over to let him know, he has his glasses on again and when you tell him everything is ready 

he barely reacts - just stands up and takes off the denim jacket he’s wearing

it’s hard not to stare - the shirt is black and tight, and he’s a boxer so his body looks like its been carved from marble

but you make a point to focus your eyes on your clipboard and not on his dumb, beautiful face

hongseok notes that you aren’t oggling like just about everyone else 

as you lead him toward the gym, you have the urge to say something - to beg him not to put on that bravado hes known for when hes both out of the ring and in it

sometimes, he gets a little scary and mean, and these are kids so -

you skid to a stop and turn, hongseok raises an eyebrow and an annoyed look paints his otherwise (stupid, but godly) face

“um,,,,,,just so you know - the kids out there respect you, and they all think you’re cool so im hoping you can just,,,,,be professional?”

his mouth thins into a line

“oh, so you think im going to go out there and act like a jackass?”

“no-”

yes, that’s what im worried about genius.

“no, im just - theyre all young so-”

he doesn’t bother to let you finish, instead he walks right on past you and out into the gym

the kids roar into applause and you pale - you were supposed to go out there and introduce him!!!!

but its too late, and you swallow the horror that building up in your stomach 

because you feel like you just made everything so much worse-

“hi kids, im hongseok and im here to teach you that everyone in this room can follow their dreams! i followed mine and now im a?”

he points the microphone toward the crowd as everyone cheers out the words “world champion”

hongseok laughs, a big and warm smile on his face

and you blink in surprise because

oh my god, he’s doing really well actually?!!??!

the whole event goes so smoothly that you almost dont believe its happening

hongseok not only connects with the kids and plays with them well, but the photo-op he was dreading so much - is so sweet

hongseok is letting kids hang off his bicepes, he’s picking kids up on his shoulders, he’s letting them play with his boxing gloves and even has kino bring out some merch he has signed to give out

you’re in awe - this is not the snooty, flashy dude you saw half an hour ago

and whose been splayed across online news pages since he debuted in the boxing scene

he’s just,,,,,,,,,,,,nice

but then again - you remember what kino had said:this is good publicity

it could all just be an act

one of your volunteers, tall and often lost looking yuto, taps your shoulder and asks if you can go get some supplies from the charity van you guys have out back

you agree, rushing over to get the things and as you’re piling out the boxes full of tshirts and applications packets

you hear the back door open

you’re half hidden by the car, but you immediately recognize kino’s voice and ,,,,,,, hongseoks?

“i want to sponsor all of the kids.”

“hongseok, that’s gonna be a hefty check you know?”

“doesn’t matter, but don’t put my name on it - just make sure the charity people know those kids are all going to be able to pick whatever program they want and ill pay for uniforms or baseball bats or whatever they need.”

“alright, ill go find the manager.”

you almost drop the box you’re holding - there are over fifty kids in there and he’s going to sponsor all of them?!?!?! and not for the free publicity?!?!?

you rush back inside, dropping the boxes in yuto’s hands who gives you a confused look as soon as you ask where hongseok is

he tilts his head and you turn toward the gym, through the door you see hongseok is taking a couple of more photos and waving goodbye to the kids

kino finds you, and asks if you two can talk for a moment, but you shake your head

“i need to talk to hongseok.”

standing out back in the parking lot, you thank him - embarrassed about how you had acted before

“i heard you say you wanted to sponsor all the kids, and im going to be honest i -”

“you thought i was an asshole, just the way i am when im boxing or on a late night tv show right?”

you kind of give him a - can you blame me? kind of look and hongseok laughs again

up close, its brighter and more comforting then you imagined

“being a ‘softie’ doesnt get you far in my sport - so i act out, everyones like if you have abs like that whyd you ever be humble you know?”

you try not to giggle, but hongseok says its true 

“well thanks again, and i know it was rude of me to tell you to ‘act professional’ you-”

“listen, id do the same thing. plus, you are probably the first person with the balls to say it to me - you do know im a boxer right?”

you kind of fumble a little, because you dont know what to say

his tone is kinda flirty, but you’re trying not to think to much into it 

kino suddenly appears, reminding hongseok of another event he has to get to

he smiles and says another goodbye to you, before you have to ask

“wait- why don’t you want people to know you donated so much to us?”

“ah, same reason. the guys arent going to let me live it down when these photos of me letting kids crawl me like a tree get out so i cant imagine what theyd say if they know i spent most of my championship money to help out these kids and not buy like....a yacht.”

he waves again and you cant believe it but you feel something in your heart twinge

that night you get a voicemail from the number you’d used when talking to kino

you assume its a message from him about the event, but you’re surprised to hear hongseok’s voice when you play it

‘aside from the fact i donated a buttload to your charity - do you wanna have dinner sometime? i actually have enough money left over for that?’

you don’t believe your ears and play it back one million or so times

in the morning you drag yuto into a corner and play it for him

“do you thin its a prank?”

yuto scratches his head, “no - i think yang hongseok is interested in you.”

#pentagon scenarios #pentagon imagines #pentagon au #hongseok scenarios #hongseok imagines #hongseok au #member: pentagon #ptg scenarios #ptg au #hongseok #pentagon #sfw #donation commissions

[dangan-meme-palace]

PokeV3 AU – Boys!

Rantaro

Flying Type

His theme is loosely based on travel.

He got delibird because he canonly likes to bring back souvenirs. Mantyke was his first pokemon and hes been using it to travel around on the water. The rest he got just by traveling to different parts of the world.

Rantaro is a traveler for sure, but when he finally settles down I imagine he would become a pokemon breeder and he studies for that while traveling.

His family is different than canon so heres some info on them too:

His dad is like a green haired Saxton Hale. Used to adventure a lot but then settled and became a business man, and a surprisingly good one at that. He owns the poke center chain and a certain mansion where he let's people visit and battle the staff for fun. Absolutely loves the fact that his son is adventurous like he was and will pay for whatever he needs. Not worried about Rantaro because he turned out all right, so why wouldn't his son? Adventure runs in his veins haha! He's just a happy go lucky guy that really loves his kids and supports them.

His mom is VERY worried about Rantaro in stark contrast to her husband, and gets mad that her husband is so carefree about their own child. She waits impatiently for the day Rantaro finally settles down so she doesn't have to worry anymore. Very doting and cute!

His sisters arent lost, they're the poke center nurses!

Ryoma

Fighting Type

His theme is competition and teamwork!

Ryoma used to be one of the youngest people in the elite four until his pokemon got stolen by the antagonist team. He barely made it out alive, but lost his pokemon and hasn't been the same since.

Would only adventure if someone gave him hope that he could find them again. The adventure ends when he finds them all because he'll want to go back home and settle down now that he's finally got them back.

He wouldn't necessarily get back into the elite four after finding them because he's just not as enthusiastic as he used to be about fighting, but he would probably become someone that gives advice to young trainers around his town.

He used to be super famous when he was in the elite four, and everyone knew him for his competitive spirit and his good sportsmanship. Lots of people still remember him and wonder what happened to make him quit so suddenly.

While he's still missing his pokemon he would hate it when people would be like "omg weren't you in the elite four?!?!" but when he gets them back he just kinda cracks half a smile and chuckles, not really answering but also not saying no.

Korekiyo

Ghost Type

His theme is ancient culture to absolutely no one's surprise.

Frosslass was given to him by his sister. He found golett, yamask, and duskull in different archeological digs that he visited. Banette and misdreavus just took a liking to him, so they joined up with him. He's surprisingly really good with ghosts types? They just like him for some reason...

Korekiyo is an anthropologist like in canon.

His sister is alive but she's really frail after her health took a dramatic turn and has to stay home instead of exploring like she used to. She was super into ice type pokemon, but cant go catch them because her body can't handle the weather anymore.

Kork wants to show his sister the world she cant go out and see anymore and so he travels and brings back souvenirs and pictures for her. She's a little sad she can't go with him, but tries to keep her spirits up despite not being able to fulfill her dream and supports her little brother's dream instead. She's still getting used to the thought of not being able to adventure like she used to.

She was a kinda famous ice type trainer that was about to make it big before her health started failing.

Her health problem is hereditary and her mother died from it when Korekiyo was born because her body couldnt handle the illness and giving birth to Korekiyo at the same time. She won't die as long as she's careful, which includes not going into cold areas and not engaging in strenuous activity. Only the girls in the family get it, and no one really knows what it is.

They dont know where their dad went, but he left after their mother died because he couldn't stand the grief.

Gonta

Bug Type

Fun bug fact: he somehow managed to accidentally catch all the bug types people that freak people out (spider, centipede, wasp/bee hybrid, bugs with pinschers, the parasite one, etc). People have run away from battles with him before and he feels bad about it but cant figure out why they ran.

Gonta doesn't really battle so much as he goes looking for new bug type pokemon. Really enthusiastic about bug types and helps his professor by giving him all the field notes he writes.

Oddly doesn't seem to have any parents? The professor has basically adopted him at this point and they don't talk about it.

Kaito

Dragon Type

His theme is any pokemon he thinks is cool.

Kaito wants to be the champion and if he calls someone his sidekick it means he wants to have them be in his elite four.

He has a penchant for doing things he thinks other people would find cool. Probably has a fucking cape and sunglasses. Wants what Leon has so fucking badly but ends up looking like an egomaniac and a try hard on accident. Totally lies about his adventures to try and look cooler to people, but little does he know that no one ever believes him.

Hasn't actually traveled much despite what he may tell you, but you could get him to tag along as long as there are no ghost types involved. He's scared of them.

Hates cold weather.

Kokichi

Ghost Type

His theme was childish looking pokemon, but then they evolved so it's mischievous pokemon with cool and spooky lore

If the dex entry mentions anything about children, odds are he's caught it already. He's a magnet to those types of ghost pokemon for some reason.

The way he caught his drifloon was cuz it thought he was a little kid and tried to steal him lmao

Kokichi "haunts" (read: terrorizes the townsfolk of) whatever place he's at until he gets bored, then he goes to a new place and starts again. He's another one that oddly doesn't seem to have parents.

He gets excited by adventure and challenges, but I dont think he would leave his country unless he had people he really cares about ask him to go with them, and he'd only go because he doesn't want them to leave him. He'd eventually come around to the idea of traveling and really enjoy it, you just have to give him some time to adjust.

Kokichi in this AU gets really attached to places/things/people that leave an impression on him and doesn't wanna let them go kinda like how ghosts possess places and things and dont want to leave until they get exorcised or find closure. Luckily for Kokichi he "definitely doesn't" let himself get attached to things anymore. I wonder why...?

His tragic backstory is that he's always had an affinity to ghost types and that freaked everyone out so they basically cast him out when he was younger and he's lowkey traumatized by it. Was kinda raised by ghost types in an abandoned, haunted mansion after that because they liked him a lot. Raised in that place but eventually forced to leave because it was so decrepit that it finally collapsed.

Once he meets someone he likes who actually likes him too, he sticks to them like glue and doesn't let go. So much for not getting attached.

Scared of bug types.

Likes Falinks and Pawniard even though they're not ghost types.

Kiibo

Electric/Steel Types

Kiibo is human in this AU. He's a technology enthusiast and a huge fan of Miu's work.

Knows a lot about pokemon like Shuichi and would absolutely geek out with him, but his interest is mostly directed towards steel and electric pokemon rather than all of them, unlike Shuichi's interest in ALL pokemon.

Heir to his father's tech company and that's how he met Miu; she works for his dad. They're really good friends and have been for years.

Magearna has been passed down through his family.

Shuichi

Psychic Type

Shuichi is a pokemon fanatic and is probably in a pokemon fan club.

Studies all day about everything from type matchups to berries but gets overwhelmed and forgets everything he's learned until he really gets into the battle.

Not bad at battling when he's not overwhelmed.

He's good to have around because he's basically a walking wiki page.

He has a knack for finding pokemon and his life goal is probably to try and discover new species or types of pokemon.

His uncle is a detective and he still lives with him like in canon. He's tracks down lost pokemon more than anything though because those are the only cases he really enjoys working on. I imagine he would be like a lost pet/pokemon detective when he's older because that's his specialty.

Solved a big case involving the antagonist team when he was younger and wears a hat to hide his face so they don't recognize him and try to get revenge. Really, really hopes that it will eventually blow over.

He would be nervous about traveling very far, but looking on the bright side of things he gets a change in pace, some new experiences, a chance to avoid the antagonist team, and new friends. He would accept for those reasons, but he would only go with someone he trusts.

#PokeV3 AU #i changed the lore while writing this so im sorry if its not cohesive. i iust keep coming up with better ideas

[tylerwritez]

Tuesday, june 22 2021

I've noticed I'm getting "the shiverys" or "the twitchy" a lot today. Like every time I FEEL something I take a moment to violently tic.... every time I think about certain things I tic.... good things, bad things, things from an hour ago and things from years ago. Tic, tic, tic.

Also, I have... some stuff to explain. Its really no big deal, but you know me: I'll freak out about it anyway. Basically I dissed my friend (rightfully so) around the time that we had just met cos they did something that threw me off.

He saw it in my phone... NOW. it's not RELEVANT anymore and I've since redacted that criticism...and now I gotta explain it to him anwyays. Oh well. I'm good at this stuff. I can get myself outta any situation. I dont even know why I'm talking like this tho... it's not a "Situation" it's just smthn I gotta explain rq.

Oh, today's song recommendation is Spirit Crusher by Death. I'm a huge Death fan...

Also! I gotta study... for my replacement exam. How stressful. Its about photosynthesis, but like, it's not simple. We went DEEP inside those fucking leaves.

One sec, lemme hook up my IV tube

Not an ACTUAL IV tube... just my headphones. But since I'm so #emo, it might as well be a fucking IV tube with the way that I cant live without it.

Its 3:08 and I'm walking home now. I was upset last night but me and Star have made up now lol... it was thAt easy. I'm so defective, making shit hard when it doesnt need to be.

It's so hot out damn. Idk. I had school today, so I had Bio class... I ACTUALLY PAID ATTENTION for once. I had lunch with Star and her friend group, and I honestly kinda feel like they're MY friends now too, even just a little bit.

Actually, I used to rant about feeling lonely like all the time but now I have so many friends it's crazy they all keep inviting me places and it's like people WANT ME AROUND... idk. It makes me happy.

Today I gotta ask if tommroow after school I can go to Bee's house to watch Supernatural (famous homoerotic ghost show)

I should also add songs to Erin's spotify playlist for our picnic saturday which I still need permission to go to.

I gotta ask for Wednesday after school to watch Insidious with Jay  which is apparently really good

Also hes the friend that I gotta explain stuff to... the DrAmA... the ThEaTrE....

Update my dad said yes to hanging out with Bee but first I'm gonna miss school to fix my broken brackets on my braces

Also turns out the house I THOUGHT we were moving into has substantial damage from shifting so... we aRENT moving there.

In case you didn't know, shifting is when like the house that's been built literally SHIFTS like it moves around.

Anwyays Jay just texted me... I'm gonna change into shorts since it's hot, set up my study area,.... and respond to him.

The time is 3:22 p.m.

Wish me. Luck.

Luck is plentiful! As it so often is in my risky, risky life.

I play my cards right. It's a learnt skill.

But also there wasnt much to explain since it passed already and was tiny anywyas.

XD so I've made up with the whole goddamn world by now.

Its 6:31, we saw 1 house. Only one. Its kinda hot out but I'm gonna bike now since we just had supper. I finally finished my homework... I just have to finish one mixed media piece as my final project for art!

Friday is my replacement. On photosynthesis and cell resp. We know this. But what I didn't mention, or I dont THINK I did, is that if I finish my art project before then I have the second block FREE!!! Me, Star, and her friend

A are planning to leave for second block and maybe get mint chocolate chip ice cream!

Also I might eat her out XD

Anyways idk. I hope I can bike tonight to call Jay.

I keep accidentally using people's real names here then having to correct it... I dont know how much i care about MY identity being discovered... but to have my friends doxxed would suck.

Man I feel bad abt saying fuck star last night cos we made up....

Wait we r looking at another house? Idk I'm in the car still waiting to go home

Oh wait no now we r goin home

Its 6:39... I hope I still have time.

I went biking, called Jay. Went home. Idk, friendly conversation... we talked more tonight and I also talked to my other friend A. Jay is... I LOVE HIM?? SO MUCH??? I feel so happy. Talking to him thinking about him seeing his STUPID FUCKING FACE JESUS. his eyes alone... I could stare at his face all day probably. I want to kiss him... hOLD HIS HAND... omg... huG HIM!!! Eofjwpxjwie he's so sweet like I can't even... and I'm proabably not good enough for him like. Wtf. Hes easily a 10. And I dont rate things outta 10. How tf do I end up with HIM? Doing stuff, as friends. Like wHAT. I guess I got lucky XD. He says he loves my personality and I'm hot XD ofc I dont see it myself. But like. JESUS CHRIST he could proabably easily pull whOever. XD me?

Whatever though. As long as we r together and stuff. I LOVE HIM A LOT. he said he loved me. Every time he says that it makes me so overly happy.

Maybe I'm just sappy and stuff.... whatever. I think it would be nice to be hugged by him.

Yeah I'm cheesy.

I'm sorta tired now so maybe I'm not writing the best.

I just keep thinkinf about love. Love is a muscle of evil suggestion. But how evil can it really be? I am just a human being and that is all. Everything else is applied. I am just a human being with soemthing in my heart that pulls me all over the place. Love is this strange thing because I'm fucked up and to be able to love without that fucked up part of me, without the damage... is this complicated, hard thing to do and I can NEVER tell if I'm doing it right but I know I'm DOING IT. I know I FEEL LOVE. And soemtimes it's such an intense thing like when you go to surf on a wave at the beach with ur belly but u hit it wrong and it's so big and overwhelming it washes over you and PULLS you down to the bottom and smushes your face into the sand and YOU CANT BREATHE jesus Christ it's like that.

Or maybe I just want to experience love as it should be felt.

Obviously all of my problems surrounding this Damage could be easily fixed if I went to therapy but. there are reasons I can't.

I LOVE a lot. Too much for my own good. Enough to hurt me, get me into trouble, etc etc but also... enough to liberate me. I LOVE. I love Jay. So much. LIKE. MY BRAIN ORBITS AROUND HIM CONSTANTLY THINKING OF HIM AND PRAISING HIM AND MWUAH HE IS SO LOVELY I BOW BEFORE HIM...

I think as much as I love, a lot of the times I tend to focus even more on BEING loved.

If I am told I am loved, and shOwN I am loved... it is one of the most powerful things. Especially since I was literally emotionally neglected in childhood... yeah. I feel like I'm always trying to fill that hole.

Not EVERY feeling I have is for that reaosn but sometimes, if you tell me you love me, show me you love me, hug me,... I'll like start crying,,, that's the childhood emotional neglect kicking in. If you call me #smol and #cute and say I look young and fragile which happens more often than you'd think XD, I know I'm not supposed to like that shit, so I act like I dont....but I do. Which is PROBABLY ALSO THE CEN 🤪  like whatever lol

Anwyays I'm fucked up

You see how quickly things become complicated in my mind?

Convoluted? Is that the word?

Whatever. I OVERCOMPLICATE THINGS COS I OVERTHINK THEM BECAUSE I'm LITERALLY MENTALLY ILL IN SO MANY DIFFERENT WAYS. I'm not joking. I obviously have unresolved undiagnosed "issues"

I do Suspect things, though.

I can make a list

Maybe I shouldn't.

Maybe I will.

I shouldnt.

Whatever.

I used to hate when people brought up my self harm. I would actually panic. I still self harm but now? Now I'm fine with anyone  talking about it as long as it's not an adult who can get me into trouble/force me into therapy over it. Because really? I kinda like having it mentioned. It's kinda validating and it's like hey... people can see that I'm sick.

I dont do it so people talk to me about it though. Dont get me wrong. If I did, I'd go vertically on the arms, not for suicide but so it healed and people would ask XD.

My scars are actually VERY hidden... cos I never intended for ANYONE to see. But for those who DO see them,,,, it's nice soemtimes to have people express concern.

I dont wanna be PITIED or anything, but idk I just think to myself "wow, they're CONCERNED... about ME... they arent angry or mean... they didnt yell at me or threaten me... they respect my autonomy and privacy...

And they CARE ABOUT ME..." and it makes me cry.

That's also the CEN.

I dont know. I just like when people express genuine concern. Even if they see and then just ask if I'm okay. That's all it takes cos then I go wow.

Its validating and irs lovely because finally people care... FINALLY PEOPLE CARE. FINALLY I GET SOME EMPATHY OR SYMPATHY AND NO ANGER.

Even just having them brought up tells me its noticeable enough

My brain does this thing where it thinks nothing bad that's ever happened to me was Bad Enough for me to be upset about.

And I dont know... its nice sometimes to be told shit like "omg that looks so bad" or to see that people who do see my cuts are somewhat shocked or revolted... it's nice because I go... "hey, it was bad enough for them..."

Or to have people comment on them with concern. Just ANYTHINT WHERE PEOPLE NOTICE IT AND ARENT ASSHOLES ABOUT IT IS VALIDATING.

Because I'm not used to that...

Because CEN

I'm. The worst perosn on the fucking planet.

I should kill myself.

I suddenly actually feel so self hating I do want to kill myself... oh god.

I ruin everything. Everything. Everything. Everything. What have I done. Like. Why. Oh god.

I'm just remembering when Star said my kindness seemed like an act. And how I've been called out for seeming fake like 2 other times.

DO I SEEM FAKE???? I DONT EVER PUT ON ACTS OF KINDESS.... CONCIOUSLY? but the very idea that I could be perceived that way...

Should I like not try to be nice or some shit?

Jesus christ she hurts my feelings even now when it was a long time ago.

But I cant blame her. I can't blame anyone for how i feel except my parents because they left me with fucking. Heart nerve damage or some shit.

I'm tired and now I'm sad too. Goodnight guys.

#JudeJournals

[rogueswitch]

kinda want to talk about my legend of korra rewrite because ive been watching it and as much as i like season 1 there is stuff that needs some fixin’

the basics are:

- season 1 actually stays relatively the same except of a few alterations - just remove the romance drama from team avatar in the early seasons, its not fun and bogs down the main plot. At the very most, just make Korra and Bolin date for a little bit, and then they just realize ‘eh, even though we have fun together and i really enjoy being around you, i think we just work better as friends.’ Give the message that people can enjoy being around others a lot and not date them, and even better, show how people can break up amicably and still be friends after the fact. (they kinda showed this in the show but because so much attention was put on the Korra/Asami/Mako ship, any actual good message from Korra and Bolin going on their date was really pushed to the wayside.) Normalize Healthy Breakups. 

- actually show how non-benders are being discriminated against like they do in the later episodes. (for example: not able to find jobs because benders are more sought after, because of this it causes a lot of nonbenders to end up in poverty and unable to get basic services, housing, etc. Or, show scenes that show how the police are mainly only policing areas where nonbenders live and really the only time benders are policed is when they are involved with gang activity. show the police being unnecessarily violent with nonbenders. Just show the inequality from the start, cowards.)

- republic city actually relies heavily on benders in the community and the culture shows this like it was in atla. less steampunk 1920's NY, less modern corporate, more mish-mash of different cultures of the world. sections of the city built from earth by earth benders with the houses being made of large pieces of stone, the coast and shipping ports being heavily influenced by water tribe culture because it would make sense that while building the city, large populations of water benders would stay closer to the water, etc. also - the big ass "totally not statue of liberty" Aang statue doesn't exist.

- Toph didn’t create the metal-bending police - Lin did. Toph would have been more aloof when raising her kids (because she hated being trapped when she was a child), and because she was the best earth bender in the world, it basically would be really difficult for her kids to impress her. Where Suyin just kinda went ‘eh, fuck it,’ Lin tried really really hard her whole life to impress Toph. After growing up and learning metal bending from her mom, Lin would go to found the metal bending police in a last ditch effort to show her mom how she is trying to to good in the world and use metal bending to help people, and look I just made this huge thing, arent you proud of me? Only for Toph to be like yea okay, but police just further oppress people and I am not happy that you turned my craft into something to be used as a means of control. Lin ends up being trapped by her inability to understand why her mom is never proud of her (she is, she just doesnt know how to show it), and ends up becoming the character she is in the show.

- Amon is still a bloodbender, but isnt doing what he does because of a misplaced reaction to abuse. instead, he grew up in poverty with his nonbender parents (maybe only 1 parent, or maybe he has a grandparent who is a bender but neither of his parents inherited it) and had to watch them barely scraping by, struggling through life because climbing out of poverty as an everyman nonbender was nigh impossible. maybe parents die when hes in his teens because they cant get healthcare. he still does the whole blocking peoples bending thing as a way of intimidation and to force attention on the issue of descrimination against nonbenders. but hes probably also killing some more high-target or influence benders in order to really show his power and try to influence local government

- season 1 ends with korra getting her bending taken away and she does not get it back. she only has a rudimentary understanding of airbending, and now seasons 2-4 are her taking her avatar journey and relearning all of the elements, but needing to unlock them via the spiritual side of bending because the blood bending fucked up her ability to bend through solely the physical like she is used to

honestly i enjoyed everything else in season one. just needs some tightening up and to remove some stuff that was done when A:LoK was only going to be a single season. i will write about the other seasons later after i rewatch them because tbh i dont remember much about them, 

#avatar legend of korra #alok #korra #avatar the last airbender #atla #self ship community #self ship #long post #alok rewrite

[herkiss-theriot]

Lol I know absolutely no one asked but here I am, arbitrarily ranking Kid Krow songs because this is a music blog now apparently and it’s my favorite album so far this year. Feel free to shoot me an ask for any elaboration or other opinions lol. Sorry for the long post. I would add a keep reading but I’m on mobile and the mobile app is somehow worse than the website. I’m also not tagging this so if this gets notes it’s not my fault. Also I’m editing the post em to say that I think this whole album is amazing and it pains me not giving every album a 10/10 bc they’re all so good

Comfort Crowd - 11/10

One of the best album intros I’ve heard compared to other albums I like. It means a lot to me and is overall a really easy song to listen to in basically any mood but is a great pick me up I think it also has one of my favorite lines on the album “you say through a sigh that I said that line already”

Wish You Were Sober - 8/10

A fun song to listen, has some solid lines. Not very relatable in my experiences but that’s also not the point lol. Favorite line(s): “knees weak, but you talk pretty fly, wow” “gettin’ good start saying gotta bounce”

Maniac - 8/10

One word titles are always fun but also -2 for some ableist language. Ik that’s not always at the top of Woke Cultures to do list but it’s a real problem and provides for some cringe vernacular choices sometimes. Overall it’s a pretty good song and is definitely one of the best on the album that’s playable even outside of the album/to people who arent into Conan. Conan apparently describes it as an “upbeat bedroom pop banger” according to genius which I guess, yeah, but what a way to describe a song. Favorite line: “we had magic, but you made it tragic”

(Online Love) - 9/10

First interlude if the album which is very exciting. Very cool idea to say that he thinks this love could be more if it were in person which translates well into current scenarios. Has a really cool guitar pattern and a nice ending. -1 bc it’s 30 seconds long favorite line: “I can’t help but imagine what maybe could’ve happened if we weren’t just an online love”

Checkmate - 10/10

Ik this was released pre-Kid Krow but god it’s one of his best songs and I’m so glad it made it on the album. It’s just got such a good energy about it and I always love chess analogies. And Ik Kid Krow Isnt a concept album by any means but I love the story arc going on of finally catching on. Favorite line(s) “cry me a river till you drown in the lake” “holding your hand but in the other one, baby I’m holding a loaded gun”

(I wrote parts for the cut that always bleeds and fight or flight and then accidentally deleted them so rip me sorry if they’re a lil short/less in depth)

The Cut That Always Bleeds - 8/10

It’s overall a great song and is really emotional but -2 bc I ugly cry to this song and get asked if I’m okay a lot lol favorite lines: “I don’t love you anymore” a pretty line that I adore”

“Can’t life another minute bleeding from my back cause I don’t have another one for you to stab”

Fight or Flight - 11/10

What a song. There’s not a lot I can say other than that it’s literally one of the greatest songs I’ve ever heard. It’s got some of the most genius song writing that I’ve heard on an album in a while. Also when I was learning to drive with my Nana i had a playlist that would go from Comfort Crowd to Fight or Flight which is an experience I recommend everyone have at least once in their life. My only criticism of this song is that it’s perception of cheating is a lil Disney-channel-esque” which maybe doesn’t make sense and also I’m fairly certain that he writes from personal experience and who am I to say he can’t write what he wants lmao.Favorite line(s) “id rather lie than tell you I’m in love with you” (one of my favorite lines EVER) “they also didn’t know that our lover loved us both.

Affluenza - 7/10

A fun song but is kind of a lot in my opinion and seems vaguely out of touch. However I do agree with the overall sentiment of eating the rich (also if you’re a trinkets fan I think this is a good song for an Elodie playlist or maybe even Tabitha depending on the perspective.) although I will say it’s a really good take on the idea of affluenza as a concept. favorite line “give me none of your affluenza”

(Can We Be Friends) - 6/10

Ik it’s an interlude so it’s kind of the point but definitely a skip most of the time even though I think the line “if anybody fucks with you I’ll knock their teeth out” gods hard. I just think one minute is a really weird time frame for a song. Sub one minute is just short enough to want more and 1:30 and perfectly acceptable for a song but one minute is v awkward

Heather - 10/10

Not amount elaboration would ever be able to perfectly encapsulates how gorgeous the idea of this song is. This idea that you wish you wish you could be someone else because you feel that this other person is otherworldly and is more deserving of the person you love. That feeling is gut wrenching. Favorite line “why would you ever kiss me, I’m not even half as pretty”

Little League - 5/10

I’m so sorry it’s just such a skip. I don’t know why but I can’t listen to this song. It reminds me of a big time rush song for some reason which isn’t a bad thing but every time I try to listen to it I think about how I think it’s a btr copy 😭 also when I do listen to it makes me cry a lot and yearning for a youth that I let waste away and I hate feeling actual feelings so minus points for that. Favorite line “when we were younger we wore our hearts out on our sleeve, why did we ever have to leave? Little league” I think it’s my favorite bc it can be interpreted in a couple of ways and I’m too tired to get into it rn

The Story - 10/10

Simple. Beautiful. One of the first Conan songs I heard. My friend was a huge Conan fan and so I listened to a couple songs like generation why and crush culture but she saw him in concert b4 kid Krow was released and took a video of The Story and I absolutely fell in love. The first time I heard it I sobbed. This idea of paralleling a bunch of failed loves and friendships in order to justify why you think yours will work is so cool and I love it a lot. Favorite line “I’m afraid that’s just the way the world works but I think that it could work for you and me.

#sky speaks

[silverjirachi]

ok so like i wanna be real with you about what being a writer/artist/anyone who posts content on the internet is like sometimes, especially from the perspective of someone who has anxiety/depression etc

so on the one hand there’s that (and this has been said before) some of this art is shared with you, not for you. sometimes we make stuff just for us, but then we post it because we’re proud of it and it made us happy and we want it to make other people happy as well.

and then this thing we make that we’re proud of that we wanted to share for other people to see seems like it falls into the silent abyss of cyberspace and no one responds and you question whether it matters at all. and suddenly the thing you shared and were proud of becomes something you question if it was really as good as you thought it was, or if rather by posting it you’re being annoying and the people who like/reblog/comment/engage with any of the things you make in any capacity are only doing it because they feel bad for you.

on top of that, then you get afraid to question/talk about it or open up about how you feel because you think it will come off as narcissitic or attention-seeking. so you stay silent and make the next thing and the same thing happens and the cycle repeats itself.

for example, those of you who watch my videos (thank you!), you probably notice that i make a lot of self-deprecating humor. part of this is just who i am as a person. but the other part is because half of the time i do actually struggle with those beliefs and the “haha this is trash content” is very real. sometimes if i’m in a really bad place i have to fight about three different internal voices telling me that i should stop because no one cares and i’m being annoying and i have a screechy voice and by sharing this i’m just reminding people how bad i am etc etc etc. i’m not saying this for you to say “oh no your content isnt trash you’re wonderful” every time i make one of those jokes or talk about this, i’m just telling you that sometimes it is what it is and i don’t need sympathy for it, it just happens, and i have to fight against it personally a lot

the same goes for writing etc etc. I dont post my art on here but from what i’ve seen lately about the HUGE gap between likes and reblogs for artists on here, i know they struggle with it as well. and some of them really need that kind of exposure because they’re trying to make art a career, they need to take in commissions and every reblog is a better chance for that to happen. we work on multiple platforms oftentimes to try to get the word out but that doesnt mean it’s always effective and that the same shit doesnt happen there too. it does. always.

then there’s the thing like... we post it online because we want it to be shared. we want it to be seen. and due to a variety of factors ranging from fucked up algorithms to just people “lurking” vs. leaving likes/comments/reblogs, sometimes or oftentimes it’s not seen and that’s for me when the questioning begins. and i ask myself if i complain about this am i annoying and begging for attention? but here’s the thing guys.. most artists dont WANT to do art in a vaccuum. If they do, they don’t share it. That’s why i don’t post a lot of my drawings. Thats more just for me. But stuff like writing and other content that I HAVE posted, and same for any writer or creator, has inherently passed that threshold. We want engagement, we want it to be seen, so yes, we want attention. And that isnt a bad thing because that art needs an audience and we want it to have one.

When we share things, we want you to see it and we want you to engage with it. We want to make you happy, we want to make you think, we want to entertain you. We want to make a difference in your life, even if just a small and momentary difference. But it is impossible for us to reach through the screen and see you. When I do live theatre, I can see and feel my audience so I can tell how they’re feeling and reacting and it’s great. But I imagine if I tried to do a one-person-show behind a one-way curtain without hearing or seeing the audience or even being able to tell if there is an audience at all, it would probably be a very different, and really sucky, experience, and that’s what posting content on the internet is like.

That’s why it makes writers’ and artists’ day when we get comments on our work. That is the only way we are able to tell that we reached through the screen. Even if it’s dumb, even if it’s incoherent, even if you think you’re being annoying, really, more often than not, the simplest comment can really make us feel that way. Because of everything I just mentioned above. All we wanna do is make you happy, entertain you, give you the joy our art gave us, and it’s scary and uncertain when you send it out there, and even more scary and uncertain when you hear little to nothing back.

I also have compared this to when I used to teach a class of 90 students. It was a gen ed theatre course and teaching it genuinely sucked ass for much the same reason. I also just get really stressed out teaching. But when you’re teaching a big class like that, you look out and see any number of faces with expressions ranging from “bored,” “on the phone,” “interested,” “awake,” to completely unreadable. And the completely unreadable ones are the worst. Posting stuff on the internet is like teaching a class full of completely anonymous, completely unreadable students.

But, in the same vein, in every class i taught, there was always a small handful of people who seemed genuinely interested in the topic. They’d raise their hands, ask questions, go above and beyond for assignments. I still think about the students in my classes from years ago who seemed like they enjoyed being there, or at the very least tried a little bit more than everyone else. They were a beacon of hope that what I was doing and saying mattered. So when I got scared of those bored, unreadable faces, I’d look to the two or three people who I knew cared, and it gave me courage to keep going. It was like I was teaching the class just for them.

Getting comments, reblogs, any equivalent of engagement on any platform is like having those interested students. When creators talk about their audience being the best part of what they do, it really is the truth. Because a lot of time everything else can be scary and uncertain and suck. And so then sometimes even when those hateful inner voices are getting the best of me, I do it for the one or two people in my class who make my day of teaching brighter when I see them. So to any of you who engage with artists, writers, and creators in any way- seriously we do it just for you sometimes, and you have no idea how much even the tiniest poke through the screen means to us.

This was a lot longer than I intended it to be but yeah I just kind of needed to get it all out of me because it’s personally been something i’m struggling with right now, and I know others do too. And again this not to say like “NEH NEH NEH WHY ARENT I GETTING ATTENTION” but just to be upfront about what it’s like so that you on the other side of screen understand that you do make a difference and can also have a positive effect on our lives, the same way we want to have one for you.

#long post #current mood #writing #depression #anxiety #mental illness