#so your girl is depressed at first

[hinsaa-paramo-dharma]

🎶dost dost na rha, pyaar pyaar na rha🎶

#well she would be the one singing this tho- #ye bandi i swear she is so stupid i want to break into her house and just slap her 😭 #ek thappad marungi na fir sane ho jayegi #first she starts everything herself because yk she believes in fucking revenge and when iss bandi ko apne karmo ka phal milta hai toh #she starts crying her eyes out- #like bhena i get it kuch log were pretty fucking brutal to you but WHY REVENGE #when yk she could have just told the teacher or her fucking parents #but no she took everything in her own hands #decided to pull some anime villain shit by making a plan to take revenge #and now she is depressed because it didnt work fully and she is one who got in trouble in the end? #gurl it wasnt a good plan to begin with and we told you #and now you think we are fucking idk scaring you so that you should “give up” #bruh #like no #we are just trying to tell you that yeh sab mein only you are going to ruin your year with your idea of trying to make your 'bullies' #suffer #😭😭😭😭 #like this girl has no fucking brain or what #she is childish but they actually think before taking their actions #toh vo log toh nikal jayenge but bandi ye cope nhi kar payegi #and she would end up just crying to herself because she even pushed her bffs away for this bullshit plan 🤡😭 #idk if i should cry or scream or beat the fuck out of her-

[gibbearish]

yknow what bugs me is when ppls criticism of YA media boils down to them just not knowing how teenage crushes work

#'bella being depressed because edward wasnt at school is unhealthy obsession' no that's called having a crush #'him asking her out by them hearing a rumor saying theyre dating and bella going 'what should i say' +him responding 'well i guess you could #tell them yes. yknow just because its easier' is lame and boring' are you kidding me i ate that shit up at that age #when two shy awkward people flirt thats how you end up in a relationship is you both kind of just sidle your way up to it #and i dont even feel like that one contributes to like 'things abt him that arent necessarily red flags on their own but as a whole point to #bad things' like. from what i gathered feom the movie bella did not seem like the type to like some big first move #like. shes an emo bruh girl. if it wasnt some sort of edgy teenage heartthrob performance then shed just brush him off like #every other Conventionally Attractive Dude™ falling all over her #ppl keep acting like her not going for every other dude who wants her is a character flaw or bad writing but. like #literally just have you ever met a depressed teenage girl. #shes Not Like Other Girls™ and finds regular guys who express emotions in regular ways boring #her wanting him over every other bland boring safe guy she could have in an instant isnt a plot hole‚ its characterization #also i disagree with the vibe that she's just a blank slate like. as someone who was a depressed teenage girl #she didn't come across as blank to me #she came across as. depressed and emo and trying so very hard to look cool and mysterious at all times and had #spent her life up to that point praying to find out magic was real and could whisk her away into a life of adventure and romance and drama #you look me in the eyes and tell me that girl didn't spend middle school chewing through every book she could get her hands on #as fast as possible. #idk #origibberish

[hilsoncrater]

me six months ago when my therapist of 2 years said a schizoaffective diagnosis would be more appropriate than a bipolar diagnosis:

me currently, as i experience gradually worsening psychotic episodes without any mood shifts:

#the kicker is that. the first ever therapist i had back in 2019 theorized i was schizophrenic #like she . said . hey girl. i think youre schizo or bipolar #& back then we all thought it was the pot i was smokin #so it was diagnosed as bipolar ii #2020 rolls around & Oh Boy . get hospitalized in early jan 2021 #bipolar i with psychotic features <- new diagnosis #but again . we thought it was the pot i was smoking #quit the pot . i start seein my then therapist #shes great i stick with her for 2 years . dont have any drastic mood shifts except depression #no mania . she thinks the depression is enviornmental based (turns out to be true) #however . she notices that . the Anxious Thought Patterns are . well . ocd #which is what the hospital staff had said #however . she also began to see that . they were psychotic #so . she told me toward the end that schizoaffective would be more fitting #well . im out of the bad enviornment i dont smoke pot anymore and yet . i am still losing my mind #she may have been . correct

[rosicheeks]

Unfortunately relatable. I grew up in the church and have a lot of Christian trauma from that. I show up for special occasions for my parents… sometimes. But it’s uncomfortable from the moment I step through the door. Bigoted pastor, the self-righteousness disguising the prejudice, the political comments from the altar. Shots at young people left right and center as if the hell on earth wasn’t caused by the same older generation 90% of the congregation belongs to..

I miss being young in the choir and the youth groups and not struggling with it. It’s wild to look back at the younger version of me who was unshakeable in his faith and honestly just saddening.

I was texting my sister today about it and she said

“I 100% think ALL of us have a ton of religious trauma and everyone else in the family just doesn’t realize it cause they’re still drinking the kool-aid.”

I ran out of tag room and didn’t want to delete any 😭 seriously not lying I could write a book about all my thoughts and experiences

#I relate to all of this so much #and it’s so sad how many people truly have religious trauma #I still find myself lucky and privileged cause I know there are stories MUCH worse than mine #it’s really hard cause my parents still think I’m a Christian #honestly at this point I have no clue what i am #even if I end up still being a Christian that doesn’t help or heal all of the years of church trauma #but the hard part is still acting the part for my parents #growing up I always tried to fit into the good Christian girl mold #cause I know that’s what my parents wanted and I didn’t want to disappoint them #but once I started smoking weed and they found out? it went all downhill from there #their perfect angel fell from heaven #and I feel like ever since I haven’t been really their daughter…. I’ve just been living on the outside looking in to everything #it hurts looking back at all the years I spent brainwashed into believing that was the ONLY faith #it genuinely makes me sick to my stomach thinking about the fact that I went to a pro life rally #the thing I was talking to my sister about was how mental health was never talked about in the church #when I started dealing with it and went to my parents or the pastors or any adult really and told them what I was dealing with #wanna know what the first thing they would ALWAYS say? well have you prayed about it? the way they treated mental illness was that it was #YOUR fault cause God is punishing you for something…. that you need to pray or go to church so then God will eventually take it away #and the thing is I don’t necessarily blame my parents (which kinda sucks cause I want to blame someone) #but honestly it’s just the environment they grew up in too… like I’m 99% sure my dad has dealt with depression his entire life #but won’t get diagnosed or anything cause they always believe faith has something to do with it #which makes me incredibly sad cause I just think about how much my dad has suffered and how he didn’t need to #^^ I was typing this out when I was late to my family gathering hahaha but then I think my sister called or something so I had to stop #sorry this post is all over the place - I swear I could write a book about religious trauma #yesterday went ok surprisingly but today? TODAY is going to be so much worse #sure I’ll make a post about it later but I guessssss I should go to bed now? it’s 2am and I have to get up at 5:45 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃 #and I have a fuuuuull day of fun Christian festivities while I’m dealing with all of this bottled up and unresolved crap from my past #please don’t get me wrong I love my parents and like I said I don’t blame them - they did their best #it just really sucks wondering what my life would have been like if I didn’t grow up in the church or in a super religious family #I wonder if when I told my parents I was depressed if they would have instantly brought me in to get help

[chichiricatsan]

There we go! It's the baby, Baby Carrot! lol

{ Part 1 } Inquisition Era Cerys

#oc: cerys surana #hard to find short hair mods that match what i had in mind but this is fairly close aside from the first default option #but i wanted her hair a little less “uniform” than the default short #she's got a bit of a “ragamuffin” look to her due to spell mishaps lol #again she's supposed to be a bigger girl and a bit shorter but alas - just use your imagination lol #maybe i'll sketch some stuff out for her again as well when i'm not so depressed #dragon age origins #dragon age #dragon age surana #warden surana #hero of ferelden #dragon age oc #grey warden #oc #original character #chichiricatsan #shiftycatstudios #screenshots #dragon age screenshots #character creation #character design

[calvinandhobbes]

the national album and tour announcement...... i feel like all my circuits are malfunctioning. 

#missing out on the green vinyl preorder which is sending me into depression . like girl relax #so excited thoooo ahhhh #all the venues are stadiums tho plssss do a lowkey first listen show on the east coast pls pls plss pls pls your nothing

[ash-etherwood]

got into creepypasta readings on youtube again thinking "maybe this time the blatant misogyny wont be as infuriating!!!! :3" you'll never guess what happened next .......

#my words of wisdom #first fucking story i listened to was another one of these fucking #'my extremely poorly characterized wife died and left me with a small child #and now im being haunted by an incredibly generic monster that symbolizes my grief and depression boohoo' #shut up matthew the babadook already did that!!!! #and no youre also not james sunderland fuck off #your wife was just some boring ass 'she was soo beautiful and energetic and the light of my life' cardboard cutout that no one cares about! #just ONCE i want a wife whose husband/bf dies or disappears and SHE gets haunted by the grief symbolism monster </3 #or just make it gay like COME ON #and then the next story will just have a gratuitous r*pe scene for shock value or whatever #god why do i even bother #because sometimes there are good ones.... sometimes..... #rule of thumb is if theres a woman in your creepypasta she will face horror beyond her comprehension #just so the male protag can say 'woah thats fucked up anyway;;' #i know this is true for almost all the media out there but god do i notice it here the most;;; #me when they introduce a female character: girl LEAVE 😬😬😬 #that was my rambling yeehaw bye

[soul-of-the-hero]

FINALLY FINISHED THE GAME SO I CAN POST NOW YEEHAW

#totk #totk spoilers #spoilders below k #the fucking ganon boss fight was so scary I was s w e a t i n g #I was fighting for my fucking life in there #I was in the TRENCHES boy #I legit think it took me over thirty minutes to ge through all the phases #the first time he flurry rushed or perfect doged me I was like ‘oh. oh I’m so fucked.’ #he was hitting so fucking hard too he shattered all my hearts I was down to TWO and couldn’t damage him for so long #I was only able to hit him when I managed a perfect party and he knew it too because #he was shattering all my shields #and staggering the shit out of me #and talking shit the whole time #I wacked him once at the very start and he chuckled darkly and asked ‘is that it?’ and I knew I was in trouble #when he said ‘I’m taking much more than your arm this time’ whooughh #but holy shit the dragon fight was so epic #shadow of the colossus eat your heart out #but I wanted to see Link hug Zelda so bad #because I wanted to hug that poor girl so bad #you have any idea how depressed I was after the light dragon thing

[indigodawns]

.

#man. had two therapy appointments today and i feel. just. very bad. not good. #first one is too much to go into but really the take away is don't do drugs kids #especially if you're fucking mentally ill #second one just... got to meet my new therapist. very young woman. very. ohh and aww and she started #with. hey. we're doing cbt :) look at this neat little printout that you can fill in :) #when i tell you i wanted to tear off my own skin #i still do! but being very cool and mature about it and calming myself down by eating and watching seokjin and that did soothe #but this woman right. 'so you think the world is an awful place? is that right? is that one of your core beliefs?' #no!!!!!! yes!!!! but like. i don't think changing my mindset re: the world is my problem??? #is it??? like... the world is awful and unfair yes but i want to React to that in a way that's useful. THAT is what i want to changr #i want to not be too tired or overstimulated or whatever to even have empathy for anyone or anything #or too numb/derealised/depersonalised whatever :'') #and she just... 'why are you sad? when are you sad?' like god fucking hell im fucking depressed okay?? we know this!!! it's fine!!! #a fucking cbt thing im....... #maybe i SHOULD give it a proper go but like. i just want feedback. i want someone to talk to #god fuck im gonna do something calming or whatever #i know i sound arrogant and whatever but man. #edit: did the big girl thing and reached out to my irl friends and sent a long ranting voicenote #and ate something easy #and im feeling a bit more like i can breathe again so <333

[bonerkebab]

bitches who answer the "what would you do in a zombie apocalypse?" prompt on dating apps with "killing myself" don't even fucking worry about it bestie I've already got the bolt gun to the back of your head you absolute waste

#like you're so fucking boring for that i hate you. why not have fun with it #idgaf if you have depression if at the first inconvenience you just off yourself youre nothing to me. grow a spine have fun #life is fun living is good actually i dont care if theres zombies we already live in a fucking capitalism nightmare like??? #and thats how the majority of girls on bumble answer that prompt it is a sickness and i hope they get well or perish and save me the energy #fuck anyway sorry dating apps make me insane i hate it here i just want to eat hole #1-25-2023

[d3l3t3d-deactivated]

thinking about how when i first started bringing my drag to fine art critiques, the critics were acting like i had DID or something, they were like "so today are we speaking to NATE or to SHEAN? is SHEAN KING in the room with us right now????" bitch what???????? i'm a drag king. im in drag. i'm the same person. i just have face paint on. what??????

#cis people are so strange #i also got deadnamed in my first fine art critique #he was like 'if shean is an extreme version of your personality #and you as you is somewhere in the middle #what would art made by ******* look like?' #um nothing that bitch would be in bed depressed or dead #ITS LITERALLY A STAGE NAME #I AM ONE MAN. #oh also that girl my freshmen year who called Shean my OC #like i mean i guess technically?

[mwagneto]

my parents came home:-(

#girl help they're doing the ''threatening to not let me do things i want when i do smtg they dont like'' again #like bro i have crippling depression you underestimate my apathy. like ok that's fine #what do u think threats are gonna achieve. also like right after they asked me how I've #been and i had to act like i didnt come this close to klling myself like 5 times this week lol #''how are you'' dissociating hbu♥ #i mean not like they'd do anything if i was honest either but lmao #on the bright side i spent way more money than I expected but they didnt get mad about it #which is a first i thought they'd at least yell at me for a bit #this is way better i can just sit in the living room and dissociate even harder til they leave #it's underrated tbh like why deal with anything when you can just let your body go on #autopilot and say the bare minimum required to pass as human while you're #hiding in the back of ur brain so you dont have to deal with it<3 healthy coping mechanisms ftw #barking

[possumsarecool]

Why do I have nightmares about fnaf characters but instead of them acting like the games I make it much worse

#romy yelling #girls i had a nightmare about sun and moon #NEVER even aeen their game btw. only know vague purpose and design #so imagine they wake up when you say good morning #and go to sleep when you say nap time #and btw evil and depressed spamton is also there and you know hes saying Anything #so when theyre awake they talk and play!! #when theyre asleep they murmer but stay still #if say night time when theyre asleep #theyll say good night in a little murmured voice. likw theyll still respond to that if asleep #now imagine that theyre some location in your house that is an upload point #not sure where it uploads TO. but the upload takes 0 sec after authorization #sun and moon are authorized and the upload point wants People #so these wacky puppet-looking furbies are playing. but also herding you to smthing that might kill you #and if theyre close they'll Hold You Down #and obvi this doesnt effect evil depressed spamton. who is also here. hes not human #but evil depressed spamton is also Evil and Hates You. #so he can snitch and wake those fuckers at any time #so first worry for your family w these guys in your house #never can say good morning again #you have to explain this to every guest you ever have #and. when youre asleep. Evil Depressed Spamton could wake them up. #and theyd carry you off to die instantly #and tbh do they even need Evil Depressed Spamton? are they really alseep? #they could be programmed to Look Asleep. they can hear you. #anyways. going through it this four am

[hecksupremechips]

Persona 3 reload should not entice me with those damn shiny bells and whistles!!!

#persona #the klock keeps ticking #yall already know lol #like first off its fucking 70 bucks??? what the hell????? #so unfortunately its gonna be a minute before i can possibly play it unless idk i have more money on my ps4 than i remember #but also yeah just that one big thing the shinjiro thing just has me so aaghh #like ive already said my deal with all that many times so you know how it is im very torn up about choices to keep the original story #and not have the coma route just cuz like i think it fucking sucks and its pretty like triggering honestly #but godddd why does the game have to be so pretty and cool looking aaaghhh #and shinji is there too and he will be all shiny and pretty as well so its like grrrr #im just saurrr conflicted idk man okay i wish my brain was normal and i could stop being such a goddamn asshole like hnnghh #girl why did i have to get so attached and relate so hard to the tragic suicidal character whose purpose is just to die lol #its a horrible comfort character to choose when youre also suicidal and going through a life crisis #its like oh boy you know what would make me feel really happy amidst all this depression? #playing the really good looking game from my favorite series with my favorite characters! #ahaha oh god whats going on with shinjiro why is there a gun ahaha 🌝 #you think id learn my lesson after p4 but alas i didnt #and im aware the game is a tragedy about life and death and its ✨dark✨ or whatever #so expecting a character like shinji to miraculously get a happy ending is all ooooh against the point or whatever #but i think thats just stupid and idk suicidal characters should be written better 👍 #and either way whats important here is that it bothers me and thats whats conflicting #cuz i so desperately wanna play and enjoy this game cuz i really did have a great time with portable #but im just not sure if i can fucking deal with this aspect i just really really hate it so bad #maybe i should just play the game and stop on 10/3 lol #or maybe ill just bang my head against the wall until it splatters everywhere and i can finally stop being so annoying about stupid shit #and ruining a stupid video game for everyone because i have to be soooo ✨triggered✨ by everything like a damn sjw fuckwad #also if anyone actually reads this lemme know if you have the same problem with shinjis death as me or if im just being weird #cuz i genuinely dont know anymore 🤔

[sassmill]

I feel so fucking seen

#the book is better than the movie because of the point of view #I fully loved the movie but it is all in the present #the book is looking back on a tumultuous awakening in reflection #there is something so much more cathartic about Olivia’s narration because it’s told from a point past the events #it’s just like Georgie said being in love was like it’s how she’s remembering it #too horrible to speak of and too delicious #and the reckoning with feelings that you didn’t understand when you felt them but realize now for what they really were #god #I have never had a unique experience because I have gone through the exact same thought patterns and anxieties #and it’s one of the most comforting thing about reading queer narratives from the past #the resonance is so complete #and it gives strength to narratives or letters that are not overtly queer but resonate exactly as such #it’s the comfort of ‘we have always existed teenage girls have always fallen in love with their teachers’ #you are not sick or wrong you are just isolated by your own experience #and I just feel so #in touch with a time in my life that I barely felt present for because it was so difficult to process those feelings that I dissociated #among other external factors in my life that were making me depressed #but those feelings #the realization of real desire for the first time at the tender age of 16 #it’s like a fucking earthquake #the doubt and self loathing and the whiplash of hope #she captured it so perfectly #Olivia #Olivia 1949 #Olivia 1951 #Dorothy Strachey

[abra-ka-dammit]

every year i get to add another year to "longest ive ever been single since i first started dating" and idk man. this isnt a record im TRYING to keep beating but

like

literally how do you meet people as an adult i do not understand

all i go to is work and theres not exactly prospects there in a staff of 4 men i wouldnt be attracted to even if they were single, and one woman who is straight and married and also my boss's daughter

#stupid shit #man. #its not like im depressed over it or anything like im clearly surviving fine while single #but you do start to REALLY miss someone hugging you and kissing you and saying they love you and wanting to hang out and go places w u #i get enough socializing through my internet friends to stay sane but they cant offer me THIS kind of love yknow... #i tried sneaking my number to this cute verizon girl by giving her a tiny notepad i'd doodled on the front of #on the top of which's first page had my name and number and a smiley face #in retrospect she probably just assumed i had written down someone to call back or smth #(or was straight or taken or just uninterested but you know) #and im fuckin sick of dating apps thats such bullshit #when ur not getting ghosted or stood up youre getting pulled in by some desperate person who would have grabbed anyone #so you can waste 6 months of your time w someone who doesnt even actually like you