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Nina: Knowledge is knowing tomatoes are a fruit.
Inej: Wisdom is knowing not to put them in a fruit salad.
Jesper: Philosophy is wondering whether that makes ketchup a smoothie.
Kaz: Common sense is knowing that ketchup is not a fucking smoothie.
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justdaphne · 2 days ago
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Kaz and Wylan play chess. It would be one quiet game with constant frustrations, smart moves and intimidating stares
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ketterdam-it · a day ago
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Kaz turns into the biggest baby when he gets sick
"Dearest Inej, treasure of my heart, won't you do me the honor... OF PUTTING ME OUT OF MY MISERY?!?!?!."
"No Kaz, it's only a cold, If you had put a coat on when I'd asked you, you'd be fine right now."
"No, I'm dying, I'm sure of it, just kill me Inej."
Inej just rolls her eyes, because he's such a big baby but she loves him.
"If you don't do it, I'll call Matthias, he will."
"Oh will you just shush."
And Inej acts irritated to tease him, but she really doesn't mind taking care of him, aside from his constant complaints of course.
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foxdoodles · 7 hours ago
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"He would be with Nina again and maybe, maybe they could begin thinking about a future.”
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Kaz Brekker x fem! Reader - His Love
A/n: So this wasn't a request but I have like little to no motivation to do anything... Sorry
Warnings: Mentions of the darkling because yes that's now a warning, mentions of being touch starved, mentions of self isolation, I think that's it? You have been warned!
Summary: Kaz Brekker goes to see his basement lover
I do not own shadow and bone/Six of Crows or it's characters! I also do not own this gif!
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His damp curls were roughly thrown back up by his gloved hand. His dark eyes flowing through people like water before deciding that they were no threat - or that they were.
The dark angles of his face didn't help the menacing look he was displaying. Only it darkened the way when he was there as if a trail of darkness that swallowed everyone up who dared to try and get close. Many had tried; all had failed.
Yet there was a secret that no one knew about not even the silent Wraith knew about. There was a shadow summoner, daughter of the Darkling right underneath the Slat who just so happens to be Kaz Brekker's lover.
Perhaps you would think that the Bastard didn't love the woman underneath, that he was only using her, but you would be wrong. Oh, so wrong. He loves that girl more then anything. More then life and death itself.
"Treasure." He whispers into the darkness around him, the only thing illuminating anything was the lantern in his hand. Even that only brightened a very small circle around him as if the light was fighting back against the dark.
"I'm here." Kaz whips his head around to see his lover was right behind him.
The beautiful woman places a careful hand on his cheek before kissing it softly once and he shivers in pleasure, nearly dropping the lantern. The dark tendrils swirl around her feet and her wrists as they warp themselves around him every now and then. He had gotten long since used to that.
He close's his eyes for a fraction of a second thinking about how it took so much time for them to get used to physical contact, with some of the Crows now it was okay but even then it wasn't great.
Unless it was with her.
Feeling her skin on his was something he now craved, they were both extremely touch starved so they were almost always touching somehow. Maybe not before, but now was the present and he didn't want to focus on the past.
Quickly he places an arm around her waist before placing down the lantern. Then he brings her close.
"Did you miss me Dirtyhands?" Her voice is like silk nothing like his rough rasp that cuts through the air like a blade. Her voice moves and creates music, either a soft melody or a raging symphony.
He was going to tease her but he stops short when he looks at her eyes and how they look in the light, something he didn't get to see very often.
"Yes." Finally he breaths out and the summoners playful expression disperses before changing into a low hum.
"Bad day?"
He doesn't respond he just turns around so he's facing her, warping both arms around her now then he nuzzles his face into her neck.
She mumbles meaningless words to herself before taking his hand in hers and leading him to her bed.
"Love, I know this isn't the best time..." Her voice trails off for a bit and he looks at her whole heartily always listening. He wasn't going to be like other lovers who looked past all her ideas and opinions, Kaz was going to embrace everything. Even her faults as she did his.
Y/n's voice picks back up again regaining her confidence and as she did the shadows twirled around in the background almost like they were men at sea that were fighting. But it was hard to tell with the little light in the room.
"But I think I should meet your friends."
One part of him wants to scream and to keep her all to himself, that part also reminds him that it would be a risk. A big one. Yet the other part of him wants her to be able to control her powers so maybe she would have the courage to leave the basement.
"On one condition."
She faces him and she seems other worldly to him. It just doesn't make sense how she can be so beautiful draped in darkness yet covered in sweetness. She was a candy disguised as a drug, addictive and sweet but something you slowly started to depend on.
"Okay, on two conditions."
"Name them Brekker, I wanted to cuddle you so hurry up."
"You have to scare them a bit so they don't spill secrets."
She rolls her eyes as if saying; 'Wow, you have great friends.' And the shadows seem to agree with her as they roll their inky orbs with her.
"And you start to work with me."
She stills for a second before letting out a breath.
"Are you sure?"
"No one would dare to touch you love, I should be asking you if you're sure."
"Yes." She breaths out taking his hand in hers. "I'll do it."
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-thedelusionreaderbitch
Shadow and bone taglist: @kaqua @rika90 @thefandomplace @musical-theatre-obsessed-dumbass @gallysonegoodlung @navs-bhat @sumsebien @dontjudgeabookbythecover @brekker-zenik @alohastitch0626
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fighting-god-69 · a day ago
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I think part of why people here love books so much is that so many book characters mess up and do super awkward things around their love interests and they still end up getting their love interest in the end. And it gives us hope that we can be super awkward and still end up with someone great. Examples, including but not limited to:
Kaz Brekker: calls the girl hes simping for an investment
Gideon Lightwood: hoards croissants under his bed for months on end as an excuse to talk to Sophie
Gabriel Lightwood: "You must really like that horse"
Alec Lightwood: falls down the stairs on his first date
Will Herondale: this man did many things. Tbf most of those things were because of his curse but still. He did get the girl
Gansey: accidentally calls his true love a prostitute when they first meet
Simon Lovelace: has to be rescued by the girl he eventually ends up with on the night they met because he got himself turned into a rat (also the two timing thing, even tho they weren't officially together)
Cardan Greenbriar: exiled his wife while giving her an ambiguous riddle to get herself unexiled and was surprised when she got mad at him
Jesper Fahey: roasts Wylan a lot in the beginning. And the first indicator that he likes Wylan is by telling Wylan that he "likes his stupid face" (this was still romantic. But it could count as it's own blunder)
Henry Fairchild: spends years of his marriage thinking his wife just married him to be nice and ends up making her think the same for him because he never actually vocalized his feelings
Peeta Mellark: the girl he loves finds out he loves her because he tells the whole nation on a television broadcast
Ron Weasley: too many blunders to list
James Potter: also far too many blunders to list
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tessasclockworkangel · 2 days ago
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Julian Blackthorn and Kaz brekker would either become inseparable best friends who plan the best heists and get that coin or hate each other with an undying passion, there's no in between
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Inej: Sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail
Jesper: Oh, no, it's okay!
Wylan: Well maybe you shouldn't have used your one phone call to prank call the cops
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ravenyenn19 · 2 days ago
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A vote: Would you guys rather new DWOD or new Dregs/ BoB tonight? 🖤🖤⚔️⚔️ I’m conflicted which I want to edit so I’m leaving it to you guys!
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Wylan: If you get in trouble, I'm gonna be your lawyer.
Jesper: Okay.
*later*
Inej: Sit down on the chair, you're in trouble.
Wylan, whispering: Deny everything.
Jesper: That isn't a chair.
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kazs-new-hat · 2 days ago
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nina is not a morning person so she probably chugs coca cola out of the liter bottle to wake herself up.
inej, concerned: why don't you just drink coffee?
nina, wiping cola from her mouth with the back of her hand: coffee is for the weak
kaz: *drops coffee mug into the sink*
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Jesper and Kaz
From a stranger to a love interest to a brother
Jesper and Kaz met when Jesper became part of the dregs to pay off debts.
Kaz would probably say that Jesper is a good investment for being an incredibly talented sharp-shooter and a substandard fabricator (because he never was trained.)
During the parley with Geels Kaz chooses Jesper to second him along with Big Bollinger (who he knew was a traitor) so Jesper was his only ssupport that shows just how much Kaz trust him.
He later chooses him for the ice court heist, but Jesper can’t keep his mouth shut and they get ambushed. This leads to Kaz losing trust in him and Jesper trying to win it back.
It’s hinted several times that Jesper wanted more than forgiveness or friendship from Kaz. He deeply regrets that he didn’t pay attention when Kaz was naked in prison. Wylan later notices the way Jesper looks at him (Kaz) and he even sells his beloved revolvers in hopes that Kaz would see that he does everything for him.
Throughout the Books they actually have a quite brotherly relationship. They fight on board of the Ferolind ending with Kaz giving him the finger and storming off. They even have a first fight that Jesper’s father, Colm, needs to break up.
Kaz has never seen Jesper as a possible love interest but he reminded him of his Brother. Jesper as well as Jordie have the wild reckless hope and they both aren’t good with money. Kaz even calls Jesper “Jordie” at one point.
That was the first time that Kaz hinted (at least to the readers) that he likes Jesper as a person and not as an „investment“ (not because he has valuable abilities that could benefit him)
When Jesper moves in with Wylan (and for a short time with Inej) Kaz tells Inej that Jesper is missed around the Slat meaning Kaz misses Jesper.
(AND later Kaz has a tunnel that leads from the barrel to Wylan and Jesper house, just saying🤷‍♀️)
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thedelusionreaderbitch · 11 hours ago
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A Lot To Take In - Kaz Brekker x fem! Reader
A/n: I'm totally doing a part 2 to this one!
Request: hello there i absolutely adored your possesive kaz imagine can i request another jealous kaz x fem!reader where reader has to get close to another men for a plan, also the reader has been distant w kaz because she thinks inej and kaz have something going on, even tho she's head over heels in love w him, i think it would be so good, only if you want if not please ignore, have a wonderful day and sorry if it's too detailed haha
Warnings: You seduce a guy? There's #spice technically... I think that's it? You have been warned!
I do not own shadow and bone/six of crows/it's characters, or this gif!
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Did you know that 55% of people fall in love for the first time between the ages of 15-18? That's over half the population that's fallen for someone - hopefully someone who loves them back.
You had fallen. Hard.
And you aren't getting back up. When Kaz Brekker strikes someone they don't get back up. They stay there, dead.
That's what you felt like.
You knew Kaz Brekker was cruel, Wylan had warned you when you had first joined the Crows. There were always warnings, they were everywhere, even Jesper would always tell you; "Don't you dare fall in love with the Bastard!"
You tried to listen, you really did! Yet Kaz Brekker was a sadistic, twisted monster who was merciless, you couldn't escape him. He was Ketterdam, with his inhumane uncaring ways - he smashed his cane into your heart. Over, and over, and over, again and your dead corpse is still saying thank you.
It only got worse.
It was bad enough knowing that Kaz Brekker would never be capable of loving you. You with your stumbling, and rambling. You with your barley decent fighting skills, the only thing that you were good at is getting information out of people who didn't want to give it. When you did that you were at your peak and you really never wanted the rush to stop, because it helped you forget - forget about them.
You saw the way he looked at Inej, and you saw the way she looked at him. Because it was the same way you would gaze upon his dark figure with naive glass's on. They glance at each other seeing that they're in love.
Then he would hold your hand stopping the breath that was in your chest, he would say something like; 'Can you help me with this?' Surely you both knew that he didn't need help with whatever plan he was putting together but you would always help anyways.
*Flashback*
"We're going to need a heartrender on this Kaz!" Inej shouted, yet you couldn't blame her as she had just been at the menagerie.
Giving Kaz a look you hope that it transfers to him as; 'Don't lose your temper.' The angry look on his face slowly softens and when his gaze shifts from you to Inej. It looks like the stars are shining through his eyes as he stared at her like she was the sun and the moon in his sky.
"I'll just get Nina to do it."
Your friend shoulders visibly relax as Inej lets out a breath nodding but doing nothing about soothing the tension that was in the room. You felt like you were intruding on something you weren't supposed to see, like seeing your parents fight and finally make up for the first time as a little kid.
"Well I'll get Nina then!" You say as you quickly move from your spot to the door, trying to get out of the room and the thick tension from your friends that were in it.
"I'll go with you." A rasp is heard from behind you, and you turn your head slightly to look at Kaz. Your eyes connect and his coffee brown eyes make you want to drink them in forever.
"Okay." You whisper as you two leave the room.
Just like that you were caught in the never ending web of Dirtyhands.
*Flashback end*
And it was torture.
Maybe you were naive before, but now you were ready. You've been making sure to distance yourself from Kaz, never initiating anything no matter what. Trying to minimize any interaction between the two of you.
You were putting armor on your heart, shielding it from the outside because you couldn't bare the inevitable break. The straw that breaks the camel's back.
That's why you had immediately taken up this job before Nina could even think about it. What better way to distance yourself then to make yourself not interested? Even if it was for a job, for one night.
"Hello, girly how are you doin' tonight?" The greasy man slurs his words together as he ungracefully slides into the seat next to you and throws an arm over your shoulder. Gross.
But you smile anyways looking at him like he was a book you wanted to read, because this was a job and you wanted information and kruge. So hopefully you could forget in the rush of pulling all the information from him that you wanted with a few words. Or a few torture sessions, we'll see what happens.
"Better now that your here." You giggle yet inside you feel like puking your guts out as his other hand makes circles on your thigh. In spite of all that, it was a good reminder. A good reminder that these jobs were more dangerous then robbing some mercher's house.
"I would hope so." He tries (and fails) to whisper seductively in your ear and it's almost like second nature to giggle.
Although it's gross and disgusting that this guy has that much of an ego, it's also wonderful because then it's easier to just hurt his ego to get the information you'd need.
However as soon as you were going to go on with your plan you see Kaz standing, in the middle of the Crow Club, staring at the guy you were trying to use as if he was the worst thing on this universe.
What in the actual fresh hell is this?!
And the male sitting beside you takes notice and slowly backs away from you, because when Dirtyhands stares at you like that you might as well be already dead. The information source starts to stand, then he hurriedly runs out of the club before you can say; 'Wait!'
Anger floods your veins fueling your heart, why did he do that! You nearly had that man in the perfect place to give all the information out of him that you would need! Even worse you were out of kruge, you wouldn't be able to pay your monthly rent on your cruddy apartment building.
Seething, you stomp up to Kaz who has that stupid smirk on his face like when the pigeons do exactly what he wants them to do.
"What the fuck!"
Kaz looks taken aback at your statement, but then his walls are up again and you can't help but me even more furious at the thought. He couldn't even have a normal conversation with you, when he knew that, that was what you payed your rent with! You were going to have to sleep on the streets!
"You just lost me all our information!" You scream not caring who could hear, because why would you? You didn't have a place to sleep, you didn't have a family anymore really, and the person you loved doesn't love you back.
"And now I don't have enough kruge to pay rent!" You pick up a beer bottle from beside you and throw it at the wall beside him, because even though you were mad you weren't stupid.
"I hope your happy, Dirtyhands." Your voice lowers when you say the next part and it's so quiet that your barley sure he heard it.
"I'm leaving."
Only his face is surprised all over and he looks... sorry?
Nerveless that doesn't matter, you storm out of the Crow Club praying that hopefully there would be another way for you to make money before you were kicked out of your crappy apartment.
"Wait!" Kaz's voice rings throughout the empty street and you spin around to face him tears staining you face. At this point you didn't care that you were fucking crying in front of the Bastard of the Barrel, because there was so much you had to figure out, pushing down your emotions was the last on your list.
"What." You blankly say, yet how tired you are was showing on your face.
His hands goes through his raven hair and he appears like he's struggling with what to say, but you didn't have all the time in the world to wait for him.
"I'm going to leave now." You say curtly turning around to get to who knows where. Before you could start walking away though, a hand grabs onto your wrist pulling you back.
"I'll pay."
"What?" Confusion clouds your brain as you gaze up at him.
"I'll pay for whatever you need just... Stay. Please."
You wanted so bad to accept his offer but could you really just lay this over? Would everything go back to normal after this? Would you find your Kaz only out of little touches and eyes held too long for just friends? And the Crows- hell even the world oblivious to what you two shared? While he still looked at Inej like she was his moon and the sun but then he would give you random acts of kindness, too kind to come from Dirtyhands or Kaz Brekker? No, you wouldn't go back to that because that was the cycle you were trying to escape in the first place.
You glance down to see that his hand that was (still holding) your wrist was ungloved, and you nearly back out with what your about to say but you steel yourself. No matter how much you enjoyed how his skin felt upon your's this needed to be said.
"You confusing me Brekker."
His head goes sightly to the side before he raise's his eyebrows egging you to go on.
"You touch my hand, or you'll ask me to do things with you that didn't need a second person but you ask anyways." A small smile is on your lips as you remember the memories. Slowly though it slips.
"Then you'll do things for me that Dirtyhands, nor Kaz Brekker should be doing! Saints, even today! Heck you were jealous Brekker!" The ferocity that was in your voice seemed to take Kaz aback as you walk forward trapping him beneath you and the wall.
"Then you'll throw that all back as you act like none of that happened!" You're practically yelling now, and you don't care that probably everyone inside the Crow Club and the Slat can hear you, you just want answers.
"Then you'll gaze upon Inej like she's the stars or something! I just-" You voice cracks and the anger that was in the air breaks, and your both left with nothing but sorrow.
"If you want me to stay... I want answers."
Kaz studies you and shakily his gloved hands come towards you as he places them on your shoulders. As quick as lightning he place a small kiss on your collarbone, he pulls away looking at you with eyes that hold jealousy. Then he kiss's your collarbone again but this time he doesn't pull away.
His lips travel up your collarbone to your neck sucking right behind your ear. Gasping in surprise your hands try and grip the wall above Kaz not wanting to overload him with your touch, as his lips moving down your neck and collarbone again sucking occasionally.
His clad leather gloves grip your hands pushing them above your head as he wrecks your neck you can't help but moan.
Finally he pulls away and what seemed like an eternity suddenly feels like a split second in the universe of bliss. That couldn't have just have just happened. Not with you and Kaz not in a million years. At least not in the cursed city named Ketterdam.
But it did.
Kaz seems to feel more alive and his hand goes to your waist to draw you back in, and you can see him staring at your lips. Just the same you can see how much kissing your neck was costing him. As much as you wanted to, you weren't going to kiss him.
You step away and you can see the disappointment in his eyes yet the also prominent relief is there. Already he's pushed himself, you didn't want him to cross the line.
"You realize what this means Kaz?"
His eyes darken as he walks forward being only centimetres apart from you.
"It means your mine."
He smirks down at you and he glances at your neck. "And the whole world will know to back the fuck off."
Your eyes widen at everything he just told you. Words are the last thing on your mind as the only thing you can think of is the way his lips felt against your neck playing like a broken record over and over again in your head. While that happens a realization hits you.
"Kaz Brekker! You did not just leave hickeys on my neck!"
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-thedelusionreaderbitch
Shadow and bone taglist: @kaqua @rika90 @thefandomplace @musical-theatre-obsessed-dumbass @gallysonegoodlung @navs-bhat @sumsebien @dontjudgeabookbythecover @brekker-zenik @alohastitch0626
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