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#social license
jingle-jangle-spurs · 8 months
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Robert House watching The Courier rip all the copper wiring out the walls of the Lucky 38
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soapdispensersalesman · 5 months
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We really gotta stop referring to every form of media as "content" what a despicable word.
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mueritos · 11 days
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As someone who’s been through multiple therapists and psychs, you’re super not wrong about these people bringing their biases to the table. I’m lucky enough that I
1. Was an older teenager
2. Had friends who had had decent mental health help already
3. Already kinda suspected the shapes of what was “wrong with me” and
4. Had an innate sense of “no that seems like bullshit” before I went in with these people.
The first therapist I ever saw met me as a 17 year old alt girl, and when I tried to talk to her about thinking I had anxiety issues she cut me off before I was done explaining and told me I was self diagnosing, that was causing my problem, and we wouldn’t “entertain THAT” any further.
The second therapist I ever saw met me as a 18 year old trans guy, pre-everything, during the pandemic. She listened, but she had no experience with the trans community and I had to teach her everything about anything I wanted to talk about with regards to that. She was nice, but she couldn’t help me. She didn’t know how.
The third therapist I ever saw met me as a 21 year old young man. She figured I had everything sorted out already. I didn’t. She never tried to change her mind or delve deeper. At this point I couldn’t afford to waste my time, so I asked to be recommended to a psych and she said sure. After that we didn’t talk.
The first psych I went to was very kind, and absolutely did not do his due diligence. I came in with a shiny recommendation from a therapist (that he didn’t verify), so he all but handed me the medication with no explanation and I only ever spoke to him over the phone after that. It was a low barrier to entry but the medication wasn’t right and I didn’t know I had other options. He made it seem like I didn’t.
The psych I’m seeing now put me on a medication that reacted poorly with my inhaler because she didn’t cross check if they would be any drug interactions. I came back and asked for a different medication. She was going to put me on a different one, and then I asked her to check if there were any interactions with this one. Turns out there were severe ones. I ended up going with a different medication, it seems to be working. It would probably work better with help from a therapist, but I don’t have the time or money for that right now. And quite frankly I’m tired of trying to convince people to help me when I have to explain what I think is wrong with me for them to listen. Only for them to decide that I’ve already figured it all out and they don’t need to try.
So uh. Yeah. Lots and lots of stories from me and my friends about clinicians of all age and experience ranges that go from horror stories to just disappointing and unhelpful. Some of these people had been practicing for 20-30 years and they STILL weren’t any better at empathy or not being horribly biased.
first of all holy shit it really fucking sucks you had to go through all of these terrible experiences while accessing care you deserve and need. i'm not surprised these terrible interactions happened, and I can't even be disappointed considering the bar of standards is in hell. The "better" experiences a lot of folks have with clinicians align with your second therapist. They are clinicians who just genuinely have no worldview outside of their own, but are receptive to new information...they just have no drive to learn how to apply new frameworks of ways of thinking to expand their worldview and guide their clients. The worst is literal malpractice, ableism, and violence against clients.
a lot of people who go into the mental health field don't actually have the skills related to active listening, empathy, or curiosity based out of humanity. I say this to a lot of people in the social work program, but social work is the same pipeline as mean girls who go into nursing--it's just full of the girls who were not smart enough to go into nursing that decide to go into social work. Same breed of mean girl seeking power over others, just different contexts of public service.
the only hope i have is in the new generations of mental health clinicians who are BIPOC/queer, anti-carceral, disabled themselves, and who are mentally ill as well. I feel more solidarity with my neurodivergent peers in my program who can barely finish an assignment on time than I do with the white women who have never experience hardship in their lives. Not to say neither of these people can't experience easy or hard times in their lives but man....seeing the roadblocks in some of these people's worldviews, empathy, or conceptualizations of other people's struggles is fucked up.
the mental health field is just another medicalized, over-policed, and racist institution that wants to shove people back into the workforce ASAP. we are in hell!! but just know there ARE people and groups and orgs out there that are dedicated to radical work and will name all the hypocrisy, pain, and oppression that exists in working in this field.
thank you tho for sharing your experience and input. I can only hope that your experiences moving forward are positive and liberating for you <3
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moregraceful · 5 months
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😐 ok throwing some long long career thoughts with a side dish of religion under here
talking to the retired pastor on saturday was so like....she was like, boy you live like this? you do so much and so much of it does not nourish your spirit or heart? can you consider WHY you do so much? and i was like, well. when i was terminally underemployed due to my own actions for a year and a half i simply went crazy in the club and when opportunities arose to be less crazy in the club, i took them. and she was like, but now you are more crazy in the club? you are so stressed you're developing health issues? i mean yeah. character flaw
anyway she told me to drop out of school because she asked what i enjoyed about it and nothing i said was about the actual content. i told her what i loved was being annoyed as hell learning about how other people experience the world and expanding my definition of what it means to be alive. she was like, you can get that anywhere, literally any good grad program will offer the experience of being annoyed as hell by your peers. why are you taking courses on a topic you don't enjoy that doesn't nourish your spirit just because you love being irritated by other people of faith. and i said ohhhhh. so i'm dropping out. uh tonight
she also said something deeply discomfiting to my view of my future. i think i've said here before either obliquely or explicitly that my dream job would be spiritual care for lgbtq+ patients in hospice . i told her that and she was like, you know that's achievable right. that doesn't have to be a pipe dream. in fact if what you love in all your jobs is one-on-one care for people, have you also considered pastoral counseling and hospice or hospital chaplaincy full stop? given that your family straddles multiple faith communities, you have very few actual christian friends, are intimately equipped for navigating both complex and fraught blood family structures, AND seem to worry endlessly about spiritual harm, spiritual violence, and spiritual trauma in all forms. and i was like WELL NO BUT-
googled clinical pastoral education, clicked on one (1) link, got so stressed out i closed the tab, but. i mean i'm not whole ass blowing up my life again based on one single conversation, primarily bc i need healthcare and also bc i enjoy two of my three jobs mostly. also bc i think my family would kill me if i blew up my life after having a bad week AGAIN. but! weird to consider that things i dreamed of doing can actually be done.
she also asked if i like to do anything creative and i simply did not have it in me to explain sports rpf to a minister in her late 70s that day so i said well i'm terrible at art and very unskilled but i love the act of creating and it always makes me so happy even if the end product is usually kind of chaotic. and she was like good, do more of that. feed your soul by creating things that make you happy. so i must continue my pat sieloff journey
life.....this is it
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compacflt · 11 months
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Okay, so I was re-reading your Slider one-shot for like the twentieth time, and what really struck me (beyond the brilliance of your writing, and the way you’ve presented the disillusionment of growing up, expecting the world to be a certain way, only to realize that life doesn’t quite work out the way you think it will, when you’re seventeen), is the casual sexism just tossed ‘round by our main characters!! :o We have canonical evidence of both Ice and Mav being pretty sexist (what with “the plaque for the alternates is in the ladies’ room” and the downright stalker-ish behavior exhibited by Mav at the O-club…), but it still surprised me a lil’ when twenty-y/o Ice was just like: “The Soviet Union did the impossible and taught women to drive” —and I realized that ah, he truly was born in 1959, or something. There’s little scenes throughout your story where I find myself wondering, which one of them is better, in this sense: When Ice tells Mav that Sarah isn’t talking to him ‘cause of his combat kills, justifies it by saying: “You know how women are”, and Mav tells him all women aren’t the same… I thought that maybe, it was Mav; but then later, Ice shows a distinctive amount of empathy for Juno, sees and respects her for the skilled pilot that she is… and I thought that maybe, it’s Ice after all—he does seem to be more progressive and accepting than Mav, in general? It also made me wonder, that if either of them had been a woman, would they even have respected the other person enough to consider them to be a rival??—or would it have a been a mildly-amusing circus side show for them, to have a female pilot at TOPGUN?
Ty for the ask anon!! ice is more socially progressive than mav yes.
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But—maybe this is my experience growing up in one of the bluest counties in Commiefornia and then going to one of the most leftist-coded colleges in one of the most leftist-coded cities in The World; uhh, even if a white man votes D all the time & has professional respect for women/minorities to their faces etc, get him in a room with a bunch of other white men, especially in a masculine and competitive environment like the gym or the navy, and uh. progressive or not, what you get is a lot of “The Soviet Union did the impossible & taught women to drive.”
And it was the 1980s. (As a reminder, in top gun’s 1986, less than 45% of Americans even approved of interracial marriage.) It sucks to say it, but if Ice was making fun of Cougar for quitting the navy cause of his psych issues such as they may be, and openly calling bullshit on Maverick’s MiG story in front of everyone, I am quite confident in saying he Would Not respect a female pilot to her face—if they were the same rank. At the same rank, it’s a competition. All weaknesses, even perceived biological ones, are to be exploited and called to attention. —But, once he’s advanced in rank, proven his own superiority, he’s more inclined to favor a meritocratic “sex doesn’t matter just fly good” attitude, ergo his relationship w/ “Juno” (she’s just a literary symbol to show that Ice may have respect for other minorities in the Navy “your career speaks for itself” but NOT FOR HIMSELF as a closeted man). This “who cares about gender/race just fly good” attitude is probably where 50s+ Maverick lands too, which is why no issues with Phoenix.
but jesus GOD maverick is a sexist in the original Top Gun. That’s why I wrote the prologue to WWGATTAI—a part of me definitely believes both he and Ice are definitively queer, but a part of me also wonders, are they just also conditioned to dismiss women as intellectual/societal equals because of their time in the 1980s male-dominated Navy? CAN they really only have a truly equal relationship with another man? I have no idea what my Ice’s sexual orientation is for exactly this reason. Yes, he’s functionally gay by the end of it, and that’s what I keep calling him—but sexuality is fluid & complicated. It’s definitely more-than possible he’s mostly straight and it’s just the circumstances of his wildly intense trauma-bond relationship with Maverick that led to their relationship as I wrote it. If you don’t LIKE/understand/respect women, and only feel at home/excited by committing acts of male-typified violence with the few men you respect, how does that bend your definition of the word straight? ...its still straight, but only straight-ish!
not to take it a step further, but WHY ELSE is canon maverick single in TGM? he canonically can’t make it work with women until he retires from the navy!!! he doesnt know how!!! His military environment is not conducive to normal long-term relationships with civilian women!!!
#and it’s well well documented that career military service does this to you!#Jesus look at cops. 40% etc.#yeah mil/LEO relationships with women are historically quite bad.#if you only respect men & then a man comes onto you—might be easier to sustain that relationship than with a woman you do not respect#I forget where i read it but this is the element of the homosocial vs the homosexual. i want to say Foucault but I think thats incorrect#EVE KOSOFSKY SEDGWICK. from her 'between men: English literature & male homosocial desire.' I think she's the preeminent homosocial scholar#if ur interested in 'further reading' not to sound like a geek#fellas is it gay to like women#after all…women kiss men…so if u kiss a woman ur kissing something that’s kissed another man…gay#ice (mid-makeout): well mavericks kissed women before so really this is the most heterosexual thing i could do#anyway#pete maverick mitchell#tom iceman kazansky#top gun#top gun maverick#icemav#asks#edts notes#mav is a social libertarian live & let live & keep the govt out of my bedroom (except for my marriage license uwu)#ice is a social moderate liberal. donates to actblue firmly believes diversity is the militarys greatest strength etc.#(i hope this isn’t too provocative to say but) look at ices outfit in tgm. libcoded. those gay little round glasses? solid lib.#the interracial marriage stat is from Gallup btw; 94% in 2021. weve come a long way. a lot has changed since 1986.#but our fav characters are FROM 1986 too so... we still cant forget that
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sanjerina · 5 months
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Just realized that it’s been 15 years since my ADHD diagnosis, 25 years since my mom (z”l) died, and 15-20 years since everyone had caller ID on their phone and a texting app in their pocket … and I still am paralyzed with guilt about the disorganized state of the entryway to my house, and generally don’t live in my living room because WHAT IF SOMEONE CAME OVER UNANNOUNCED???!?
Like the “hide the couches, we can’t tell people we sit!” thing is so real in my head? It’s a fossilized fear that has absolutely nothing to do with reality.
(Also, I have a murderous attack cat, so no one wants to come to my house anyway? And he’s twelve, so that’s not new either.)
But noooooo my brain is still stuck in the mid-1980s when my mom would just “drop in” on her sister or stepmother for a cup of coffee, and God forbid if they were engaged in housework or not dressed and ready for visitors. Back when people still just randomly knocked on your door and tried to sell you stuff!
Back when I would come home from school, and my mom — brilliant, bored, and almost certainly exhibiting symptoms of OCD — would have rearranged the furniture in my bedroom and be sitting by a pile of crap on my bed that needed to be sorted and organized RIGHT NOW.
Nowadays, even my best friends — the ones I trust to talk me through a panic attack — still text me and knock on the door. Absolutely no one is going to barge into my home on zero notice and judge my housekeeping and/or dishabille. I broke up with the girlfriend who said my housekeeping made me “unfuckable” (and we’ve both had a lot of therapy since then).
But my nervous system apparently still considers this boundary violation to be a terrifying and constantly credible threat. Nice one, brain. Let’s fix this, yeah?
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By Deisy Francis Mexidor
Cheryl LaBash replies with a smile when asked how many times she has visited Cuba. She is one among countless Americans who call for the rapprochement of the two shores with the love, energy, resilience, and nobility of a people who have managed to survive against all odds.
She is like an industrious ant when it comes to Cuba. How does Cheryl manage to be in Detroit one day, Boston the next, and Washington, D.C., the next? And in that back and forth, she drives her dark gray Toyota on roads, highways, and streets with a singular license plate: “Cuba Sí”.
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luuxxart · 2 years
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Shuake Week Day Seven: Music
(day late posting here oops)
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freakoutgirl · 5 months
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going to be real with you chief. i don't think we should have to memorize this many numbers.
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Stephanie Whiteside at NewsNation Now:
(NewsNation) — TikTok users can say goodbye to songs from Taylor Swift, Drake, Adele, SZA and other top artists after a dispute with the social media platform over pay. TikTok maintains a music library that allows users to add snippets of songs to videos, often driving trends linked to song lyrics. But Universal Music Group has now pulled its catalog, saying TikTok has refused to pay an adequate amount for songs. In a statement, UMG said, “TikTok proposed paying our artists and songwriters at a rate that is a fraction of the rate that similarly situated major social platforms pay.  The company said TikTok only accounted for 1% of its revenue despite the social media company’s increasing earnings and reliance on music to promote content creation. UMG also accused TikTok of allowing AI-generated music to flood the platform and encouraging AI-generated music in a move it called “sponsoring artist replacement by AI.”
Universal Music Group (UMG) has pulled off all of its artists from TikTok. The impacted artists include Taylor Swift, Adele, Olivia Rodrigo, S Club, Papa Roach, and The Killers, along with many others.
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swagging-back-to · 2 months
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got denied for the credit card bc my w-2 doesnt show my full social security number and capital one thinks it's realistic at all to expect paystubs to have your full uncensored social security number WHEN NOT EVEN YOUR TAX FORMS DO!
had to apply for a new social security card. had to sign up for a website. which theyre sending the activation code to me BY MAIL FOR. literally fucking the mail. and then i have to activate that and ONLY THEN will they consider ssenidng me a new card---which will take ANOTHER WEEK to get here at least. and then i have to MAIL the card to capital one so they'll continue my credit application.
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cleromancy · 3 months
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i would be wayyyyyyy more likely to see tim pursuing higher education if he had graduated high school (~*new earth continuity post*~). bc what he did like about school was socializing with peers and the aspect of normalcy and like... hes absolutely not going to re-enroll back in hs atp. hed have to get his GED. and he... could do that. but he'd have to be motivated enough to want to go to college enough to schedule the GED i think months in advance plus needing to wait for the next semester of whatevwr gotham community college hes looking at to start... And Also the very high chance that he would miss his appointment for the test LMAO like it would be incredibly on brand for him to sleep through it or like be stuck in, idk, brussels or someplace on a mission and misremember the time difference. furthermore after a certain point hes gonna start feeling like he missed his window particularly if what he *actually* wants is to be around normal ppl his age and feel tethered... like at that point just go see if ives has a tabletop rpg thing going u can join baby yk
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tam--lin · 10 months
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A general PSA that within the last year North Korea has turned their propaganda machine to social media, so if you're seeing North Koreans or foreign tour guides who work in North Korea pop up on TikTok or YouTube, that is state-approved propaganda. Access to the internet is so heavily controlled that there's literally no way for it not to be. These are NOT random citizens trying to broaden your view of the DPRK, they're wealthy, connected, well-educated individuals who want you to believe that life in North Korea isn't that bad when it very much is. You are not immune to propaganda.
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moregraceful · 1 year
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u know what?? the san jose sharks franchise in san jose, ca really did say trans rights bc changing my name as a season ticketholder in that organization has been five thousand percent less painful than like. almost everything else
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levi-dayne · 9 days
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being autistic -> 🫠
vent in tags
#im so fucking burnt out#its so frustrating bc according to my parents im 'high functioning' and 'shouldnt let my autism impact me that much'#beyond that being outdated like they didnt just slap an autism label on me for FUN. its bc i fucking have autism#so yes i have difficulties related to my autism. they dont understand and its so frustrating theyre always on my ass about things i CANT do#or struggle doing bc im autistic and burnt out and i hate this so much#and i called my mom out on it and she said 'well i didnt say you dont struggle just that it should be manageable'#okay but its fucking not???????#like i stg they think my autism is JUST special interests and sensory issues. which its fucking not.#i struggle taking care of myself. i struggle interacting with people. i struggle with keeping up with things or switching between tasks#and dont even get me started on my DAD he doesnt even believe the doctors that im autistic#he compared my inability to understand social cues to wanting to be a bitch but being forced to repress it#like dude. when people perceive me as being a bitch its not bc im failing at hiding it#its bc i genuinely cant tell if my words or body language is coming across as bitchy even when i dont have any underlying resentment#he doesnt even think im autistic which is so frustrating#my mom begrudgingly accepts it but my dad thinks the LICENSED PROFESSIONALS are wrong#he hasn't done ANY research on autism EXCEPT to correct me when i say autism instead of autism spectrum disorder#which is also bullshit bc he and my mom use outdated terms like aspergers all the fucking time#(and ableist slurs)#im just so overwhelmed and i cant function#personal posts 😌✨️✨️
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ultramarine-spirit · 2 years
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Lucathy Exhibition at Kuaikan Convention
KKWorld2022, Kuaikan Manhua's convention, is currently underway. WMMAP has its own exhibitions, and of course they include lucathy! Attendees can participate in the attraction shown above, where multiple popular ships are featured (claudiana is there as well!). In the exhibition, reminiscent of a chapel, you can get marriage licenses for the pairs and write your best wishes for them. The chapel also features prominent WMMAP fanartist Juan捲's lucathy artwork. On top of that, you can connect Lucas and Athy using the red string of fate.
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