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seljepw · 6 years

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A Spell of Ice and Fire

A/N: I took a bit of creative license; played fast and loose with the continuity. Because, well… I find Pellegrino hotter than Casifer. And I’m the Chuck of this little world. MUAHAHAHAH! ::ahem:: …Anyway, I hope you like it!!! Also, thank you for your patience. See? I do take requests! I just…. take a long time on them….

Menu Warnings: ALL THE SMUT!! Power struggle, sex magic, Demon Power!Kink, Cold!kink (is that a thing? I’m sure that’s a thing), equal-opportunity oral sex, orgasm denial (more like inattentive partner, but…), unprotected sex (Porn is not real life, y'all.), really rough sex, restraint, ménage a trois, almost-death by hypothermia. And if that’s not enough, strong language and drinking.

Word Count: 5,300ish (Yes, it’s a bit long. But you’re getting two for the price of one, here.)

The picture was everything Crowley liked. You, in your black lace robe and nothing else, reclined on your bed, cut crystal glass of Glencraig in hand. If this didn’t get his attention, nothing would.

<It’s rude to make me drink alone> You typed under the photo, and hit send. And waited. And waited. And then you drank your scotch alone.

It had been three weeks since the bastard had contacted you. Granted, you’d been keeping your relationship quiet (he had a whole dimension to run, you had your coven to look after, and his continued contact with the Winchester brothers could be hazardous to your health), but still. He had never gone more than a day or two without at least a text. You were starting to worry.

Lucifer lounged on the throne, one leg thrown over the armrest, thumbing through Crowley’s phone. When the picture and text came through, a look of glee diffused his face, and he leapt up to saunter over to Crowley’s cage.

“Well, lookie lookie here, doggie. Seems your bitch is in heat.” He crouched down to wave the phone in front of Crowley’s face. The captive king lunged, threw his hand through the bars, and tried to grab the phone, but Lucifer was too fast.

“Bad dog.” The devil studied your picture for a while, an evil glow in his eyes. “You know, this one isn’t half bad. Definitely out of your league- how did you get that?” He squinted at the screen. “Waaait a minute. There are hex bag goodies on that table in the background. Are you schtupping a witch? Oh, that’s just too deliciously Oedipal. Does your mother know what you’ve been up to, young man?”

Crowley snarled around his gag, which delighted his captor. Giggling, Lucifer began tapping out a response. “You know, I work really hard. I think I deserve some fun, what do you think, Dog?”

The phone on your nightstand buzzed. Still suspended between worry and annoyance, your heart somersaulted as you reached for it.

<I’d love to see you lick that scotch off my cock.>

You were slightly taken aback. Crowley usually bantered a bit more before getting to that kind of thing. Was he trying to make up for weeks of silence by diving straight in?

<You’re not getting off that easy. Where have you been?>

Something was up. Avoidance tactics weren’t how your relationship worked, and Crowley knew that. Flirting, innuendo, double entendres, of course. But this felt… off. Screw this cryptic shit. You called him.

“Good evening, you’ve reached Crowley’s phone,” drawled the voice on the other end. “I’m afraid he’s a little tied up right now, but I’d be more than happy to service you.”

“Who the hell is this?”

The voice in your ear giggled. Actually giggled. “Who the Hell, indeed. Honey, I am Hell. Didn’t you get the newsletter? There’s been a change in management.”

You finally made the connection. “Lucifer?” You were vaguely proud that you kept your voice calm.

“Bingo, baby.”

“So. Crowley’s dead, I assume.”

“Now why would you assume that? Is my reputation that bad?”

You shrugged. “It’s just what I would have done, after a coup.” (In fact, it was what you’d done right after taking over your coven. It was just good business.)

Another giggle. “Oh, I like you. Tell you what, buttercup; why don’t you shimmy that gorgeous ass down here and see for yourself.”

Your heels clicked on the slate floor as you made your way to the throne room. You smoothed the short skirt of your dress down and tried to get your nerves under control by focusing on the sound. Bad bitch, bad bitch, bad bitch, it seemed to say. It wasn’t that you were scared, really. You’d always wondered what Lucifer was really like. He was kind of a big deal in your circle. But it would be suicidally reckless to walk into the Devil (capitol D)’s presence unprepared. You double checked your energy-shield hex bag and mental ward spells, took a breath, and blew open the doors with a flash of your hands.

They hit the stone walls with a satisfying BOOM. You paused in the doorway for a moment to regard the man draped across Crowley’s throne. You had been picturing tall, dark and malevolent. This guy looked… softer than you had expected. Sandy hair, rounded face, almost… dadlike. It brought you up short, as did the temperature in the room. It was cold. Not see-your-breath cold, but enough that your exposed skin broke out in goosebumps. You called on the magic in your hex bag, and shook off the chill. You were on a mission.

Hands on hips, you glared at Lucifer from your stance in the doorway.

“You rang?”

Something about Lucifer’s presence on the throne made it look… cheaper. Even in a slouch, Crowley blended with the throne, made it complete. Lended gravitas. Lucifer- lounging like a frat boy, dressed in rumpled earth tones- just made it look like a chair on a dias. The Devil spread his arms wide in welcome, but didn’t get up from his lounge.

“There she is! Crowley’s mystery woman! You know, you aren’t named in his phone.” He waggled the device in illustration. “Just an initial. Like he was hiding something.” Now it was waggling eyebrows aimed at you. “If I had you on speed dial, I’d have it tattooed across my forehead. Who are you, gorgeous?”

You weighed options for a moment. Should you lie? Could you really hide your name from Lucifer? Probably, for a while. Your mental warding was strong, but should you devote a piece of your power to that endeavor?

Eh, fuck it. Best to get to business. You reveled in the echoing click of your heels as you made your way toward the throne. Bad bitch, bad bitch, bad bitch…

“I’m Y/N,” you said, “Where’s Crowley?”

“Oh! He’s right over here, where I can keep an eye on him.” Lucifer lazily stretched out a hand, indicating one of the grates in the wall. “He’s such a bad doggie when I’m not around.”

The iron grid swung open, and Crowley slid out, bound to a rolling platform. He came to a stop a little to the side- but still in view- of the dias. The perfect spot to have a trophy on display, but still be able to handle business. Lucifer had clearly practiced trotting his captive out, before. You crossed to inspect the huddled, grimey figure. Chained, gagged, and wearing a Hawaiian shirt, of all hideous things. Everything Crowley hated; restricted movement, loss of voice, and disgusting fashion choices, all at once. He must be in agony, you thought.

You had been alive for about 12 decades. Long enough time to develop a truly impressive poker face. It took all of your considerable skill to hide the horror you were feeling. Lucifer had swung around, leaning forward on the throne, laser-focused to gauge your reaction. When you remained stoic, he huffed in disappointment and sat back. Crowley knew you, though. He knew a blank face on you wasn’t always what it seemed. His bloodshot eyes bored into yours, with an equal mix of begging for help and rage at having to do so.

You crouched down and met Crowley’s gaze on his level. Under pretense of enjoying his predicament, you inspected the chains that bound him. All pure iron and warded six ways from Sunday. A hefty job- almost impossible to break. Luckily, you were good with impossible. Rapid-fire calculations sprinted around behind your mask in indifference. You’d need some extra energy to take on this kind of mojo. Only two things gave that kind of oomph- blood, and sex. Blood wasn’t an option, right now, but… You crafted an evil grin and the beginnings of a plan.

You rose to your feet again, turned the grin on Lucifer, and said, “Nice work. I’m still confused as to why he’s breathing, but he’s not getting out of that any time soon.” Crowley made a muffled keening noise at your apparent dismissal.

“What can I say?” replied the Devil, “I like rubbing his nose in his own incompetence. I’m a fan of the classics. Would you like a drink, Y/N?”

“That would be lovely, thank you.” You crossed your arms; a subtle hoist of breasts.

“Great. I trust you know where it is,” he dimpled at you, “Grab me one, while you’re at it.”

Cheeky bastard. You smirked at him and added some extra sway to your hips as you made your way to Crowley’s well-stocked bar cart against the far wall. You could hear Lucifer’s hum of approval as you went. This is how he wanted to play it? Perfect. You were an expert at this kind of game. And you were going to have so much fun playing it. You poured a generous tot of whiskey for yourself- only yourself- and turned back to face him.

You leaned back against the cart, swirling the liquor around the glass, watching it catch the dim light and flash amber/red/gold. Buying a bit of time to firm up your plans.

“So. You summoned me here. You showed off. What exactly is it you want from me, Lucifer? I have things to do.” You finally raised your eyes from your glass, and mixed a bit of smolder into your impertinence. You took a slow sip, never breaking eye contact. Crowley hadn’t taken his eyes off of you this whole time, but you kept him strictly in your peripheral vision. The bulk of your focus was on the usurper on his throne.

Lucifer pivoted his head a bit, raised an eyebrow, and regarded you in a new light. He looked mildly impressed.

“Well, now, Y/N. You are one stone cold wicked witch, aren’t you?” Your only response was a small salute of your glass before your next sip. “Why on earth would a magnificent creature like you waste your time with a cut-rate pipsqueak like Crowley?”

There was a whining “now wait just a minute!” kind of growl from the chained figure on the floor, but neither of you acknowledged it.

“He’s more useful than he looks.” Another sip, and you took your time licking the errant drops from your lips. “After all, a girl has needs.”

Finally, Lucifer looked down at the captive king. He pursed his lips around a smile and seemed to come to a decision. “I have a proposition for you, Y/N. How would you like to upgrade to a…” he shifted on the throne, drawing attention to his hips and groin, “…first class seat?”

“Interesting offer.” You let him see you noticing the bulge in his pants. Let him see the appreciation you didn’t have to fake. “What’s in it for you, though?”

He spread his hands like it was obvious. “I told you. I like making sure my dog knows his place. And I’m a fan of the classics. Nothing for screwing someone over quite like screwing their lover…” he sucked his teeth for a second, and gave a faux-innocence glance toward the ceiling- “ Especially right in front of them.” Your breath caught a bit at that. This game was shaping up to be very interesting, indeed. To cover your shiver of anticipation, you slid away from the bar cart and started snaking toward the throne, glass of whiskey pressed to your lower lip, like you were mulling it over.

“And what’s in it for me?”

“Aside from the obvious?“ He glanced toward his lap. “Witches are whores… for power. You crave it, you chase it… After all, that’s what keeps your batteries charged, isn’t it?” He pressed a fingernail between his teeth and regarded you from under heavy eyelids. “You like power. Well, I’ve got all the power right now, sweet cheeks. Whatcha gonna do?”

Showtime. You didn’t even glance in Crowley’s direction. All breasts and hips and badass heels, you slowly stepped up onto the dais and swayed your way to over to Lucifer’s knees.

“Your highness,” you demurred, and offered him the last sips of your drink. The brush of fingers as the glass changed hands elicited another shiver that you didn’t bother to hide. His eyes raked up and down your curves, then finally lifted to meet your gaze. He quirked a smile and a finger at you.

You leaned over him, gripped the finials of the throne. This had the added bonus of bringing your breasts closer to his face. Using the leverage, you slowly lifted one leg, then the other onto the armrests, and finally lowered yourself onto Lucifer’s lap. Crowley loved that move, so you had made a point of perfecting it. The Devil hummed low in his throat and drained the last of the whiskey, then tossed the empty glass over his shoulder. The shatter of Waterford crystal cut through the charged air. He ran rough, winter-cold hands up your thighs, under the hem of your dress, and over your hips. When he reached the swell of your ass, he sank his fingers into your flesh and pulled you down, grinding against you. You didn’t have to fake your gasp and moan. Oh, yes. This was gonna be Fun. You were already wet enough to leave a damp spot on his fly.

You slid your grip down to his rumpled, sandy hair, and lowered your mouth to his. There was that cold, again- kissing him was like sipping ice water. You noted a forked tongue sliding against yours. Interesting… You used your hold on him to pivot a bit, get Crowley in your line of sight while moving Lucifer’s away.

Crowley’s eyes were blazing red. His fingers were white-knuckled on the chains. Every line of his face spoke his thoughts clearly. What are you playing at? You winked at him. He recoiled a bit, finally catching on to your plan. Lucifer switched his attention, kissing goosebumps along the swell of your breast and you continued your silent conversation with Crowley. Chains clinked as the king indicated the spots that were holding his power at bay. These bits, first, Love. I’ll handle the rest. You turned your nod into a full-body curve, undulating against Lucifer and dropping to suck at his neck.

“Mmmm, this one’s a slut, Crowley. Well done.” You bit him, just hard enough. He let out a little, impressed “Oooo” and his hips jumped up, trying to trust through layers of denim and cotton. “A rough slut, at that. I’m gonna love making you scream, sweetheart.”

At that, a fresh flood of arousal hit you, and you put more effort into your movements. You rutted against his erection- back and forth, side to side, a little swirl here and there. You locked Lucifer in a devouring kiss, ran your nails down his biceps, and kept his focus on you.

While your body moved on the Devil, your brain moved on the chains. Mentally- magically- you slid over every link, nudging and tapping the enchantments, looking for those infinitesimal cracks that exist in even the strongest spellwork. You mapped out a likely plan of attack.

As you worked- and worked Lucifer’s lap- the Devil’s growls and humms started to rise in pitch. He was getting close… After a particularly dexterous twist of your hips, he threw you off with a guttural roar. You flew back into the air, and hung there, suspended and splayed out as though strapped to a whipping cross, gasping, skirt crumpled around your waist. The cold air on your soaking panties brought on a new set of shivers.

“Not so fast, Y/N,” he chided, “I plan on giving my dog a real show. Can’t pop my cork, just yet.”

He leapt from his seat, took a step forward, and ripped your underwear apart. The ragged pieces slid down your legs and onto the floor, leaving you completely exposed. Cold fingers went straight for your dripping pussy, prying your lips apart and snaking inside. Your groans echoed in the stone room.

“See, doggie? She loves what I can do to her. Your little bitch is getting so wet for me…” He twisted his grip and hammered two fingers against your g-spot. You gasped and squealed at the unexpected sensation. “Thaaat’s it, Y/N. Let him know what he’s missing. Show him you’re mine, now.”

He angled his mouth to your opening and that forked tongue shot out, flicking across your clit. You convulsed against your invisible bods as Lucifer fucked you with his mouth, slithering along your folds and into your channel, spreading shocks of cold along your trembling nerves. You lost your mental hold on Crowley’s bonds. Lost your hold on everything but the ice cold lips and tongue that were setting you ablaze.

“Aaaaaaah! Fuck! Fuck!” You shrieked, “Oh, fucking shit- yes!”

As suddenly as it had begun, his assault on your senses stopped. He stepped back, let you fall to the floor, and towered over you as you knelt there, shaking with cold and confusion at the denial.

“What the fuck was that!?” You spat up at him.

“Not enough.” He tore at his belt and fly, letting his erection spring free. You only got a glimpse of the curve of him, the precome clinging to the purple head, before he leaned forward and yanked your dress up and off. Your bra got the same treatment as your panties. The energy-shielding hex bag you had been hiding went bouncing into the shadows, and the full effect of Lucifer’s presence hit you.

Goosebumps erupted onto your skin, and your nipples strained painfully in the chill air. The shock was just what you needed to bring your mind back to the task at hand. Bad bitch, you reminded yourself.

Lucifer’s labored breath fogged and fell around you in tiny crystals. It had gotten colder since you started your game. Did that mean you were winning, or he was?

“Not enough,” he repeated, getting control of himself, “I want my dog to see his slut sucking my cock. Now, be a good girl and open your mouth.” His eyes erupted with burning light.

Game on, then. You slunk forward, closed the distance, and slid your focus from Lucifer’s dick- held tight in his fist- to his glowing eyes. You didn’t look away from those twin blazes as you wrapped your lips around the freezing head and slid as far down the shaft as you could. You sucked gently, added a hum for vibration, and rolled your tongue along this length. Again, the cold was shocking. Like sucking an icicle.

When his head fell back in pleasure, you really went to work. Gripping his belt loops for leverage, you slid your mouth back and forth around his girth, working your tongue in swirls and twists, letting the wet sound of your mouth and his groans fill the room. You ignored the fact that your lips were going tingly and numb. Nothing distracts like getting head, and you needed Lucifer good and distracted.

Again, you reached out to Crowley’s chains. Pinpointing each place vulnerable to attack. Setting invisible pins of magic into the fissures. Tiny lightning rods to attract your spell.

After a few moments, with a feral growl, Lucifer’s fingers tangled in your hair and stilled your movements.

“Ah, ah, ah, Y/N. You’re trying to get me to come. I’m gonna have some more fun, first.” He snapped his fingers, and suddenly, you were laid across the the throne, facing Crowley’s platform, your hands gripping one armrest, the other supporting your hips, holding your ass in the air. “Watch this, dog. I want you to see her face while I fuck her.”

Crowley snarled and flung himself forward against the chains. But, you noticed, not hard enough to disturb the work you had already done. You gave a subtle nod and wink to show you approved of his little show, then glanced over your shoulder at Lucifer.

“Well, come on, Satan. What are you waiting for?”

“Ooooh! Hear that?” Lucifer menaced at Crowley as he stepped behind you and fitted that ice cold tip inside your folds, “She’s begging me. Begging to get fucked. You haven’t been taking care of her, have you? Bad dog.”

He slid into you, slower than you expected. Ulterior motives aside, it was exactly what you wanted. You were still buzzing from your denied release, and you enveloped him gratefully, purring and shivering and arching your back in welcome.

“Oooooh, she’s tight!” Lucifer gripped the throne for extra purchase, rushed out and then slammed back into you, pinning you between his body and the purple velvet upholstery. You screamed. He did it again. And again. One merciless thrust after another, wringing shrieks and curses from you, that stinging cold radiating from your center; it was so fucking good. You had to hold on- keep the magic building until it was strong enough… you concentrated on your power and pooled it around the gorgeous torment in your pussy, let the pain feed it, let it build.

Lucifer’s icy cock kept stabbing your center faster and faster until your teeth were chattering and your muscles were spasming. You held on, wallowing in it.

He was talking to you, praising you as much for Crowley’s misery as his own pleasure. “Oh, fuck, Y/N! That cunt is so fucking tight! He doesn’t deserve to fuck this cunt, does he? It’s mine, now! You like that? You like that- OOOH FUCK!”

You caught the threads of your spell right before he came. As the Devil spasmed inside you, a shockwave blasted through the room. You grit your teeth and took the discharge; used the force of it to drive the magic into the weak spots of your king’s chains. Lucifer, oblivious to everything but his own release, slumped forward onto your back, panting.

You were so cold, you couldn’t really feel it, anymore. Close to passing out. Hypothermia facts flickered through your frozen brain. Can’t sleep… Sleep is bad…. So tired… Your vision darkened around the edges, contracted in, enveloping you in unconsciousness; you had almost succumbed when you felt a familiar heat in your chest. Crowley’s demon power. You smiled with blue lips as the warmth grew, slow but steady; keeping your heart beating, your lungs working, keeping you alive. You’d done it! He was free!

A metalic *chink* at your back, and the weight pinning you down was gone. The snarling curses and scuffles behind you were a far-off thing, and not your concern. You slid back, collapsed to a shivering heap on the floor at the foot of the throne. Drifted. Warm hands gripped you, cradled you against a broad chest, wrapped you in steady heat.

You slept.

When you came to, you were cocooned in blankets on Crowley’s huge bed. A fire roared in a marble fireplace, the room was sweltering. You kicked free of the down comforter, dislodging the healing talismans tucked around you, then wrapped the sheet around your naked form, and padded over to the door. The hallway beyond was deserted, flickering candlelight the only movement you could see. You slowly made your way through the corridors of Hell, and saw not a demon nor soul. Eventually, you arrived at the open doors of the throne room.

Crowley was back in his place on the throne, resplendent in his tailored black suit, one polished shoe casually propped on the opposite knee, reading a comic. Lucifer was gagged and chained to the dias at his feet, leaning sullenly against the side of the throne. When you entered, the king laid aside his reading material and gave you a self-satisfied smile.

“Ah, there you are, Love. Was wondering when you’d join us, again.” He tipped his head toward Lucifer. “I’ve redecorated since yesterday. Do you like it?”

“You don’t think it’s a little… obtrusive?” you smirked as you made your way toward the dias, “I mean, what’s the function of such an ornament? You know how I feel about klutter, dear.” When you reached the throne, you leaned down to collect Crowley’s offered kiss.

“I won’t make the same mistake twice, Love. Satan’s going back in the pokey.” He gestured to an altar to one side of the room, spell ingredients clustered around your favorite brass cauldron. You smiled. He was so thoughtful- bringing your toys to you.

Crowley continued with a cunning leer, “But I couldn’t toss him back in the cage before you got to say goodbye.” He waved a vague hand around at the silent fortress. “I cleared the place out to give us some privacy.”

“You are sooo sweet to me, Crowley,” you simpered. He grinned at your joking subservience, opened his arms, and welcomed you to sit in his lap. Once you were settled, he brushed back your hair and laid little tickling kisses down the side of your throat. You’d think you’d had enough of shivering, but the bristle of Crowley’s beard and the heat of his breath was just the ticket.

“My Queen…” he drawled. “My warrior queen. Why don’t you tell me what else I can do for you?”

You hummed thoughtfully, slid your fingers through that beloved dark hair, and leaned in for another kiss. Crowley matched your hum and smoothed his hands across your shoulders and down your back, sending the sheet slithering to pool at your waist.

There was a disgusted snort from the captive on the floor.

“You know,” you said, pulling away to regard the king and adjust his tie, “Someone was awfully greedy with me, before. I nearly died and I never even got to come.” You pulled your lip into Crowley’s favorite spoiled-girl pout. “Fix it, my king.”

He made a little sound of sympathy and leaned in for another quick kiss. He reached up and took one of your nipples between his warm fingers and applied slow, twisting pressure. A little whine of pleasure escaped you, and you undid all your tidying work by gripping his tie and pulling him closer.

“Hmmm… Yesterday, you seemed to enjoy playing with my new pet. Would you like to let him try and please you, after all?”

You wicked grin was honest, this time. “Oh, yes, my king. But I’ll need your help…” you slid your hands under his coat and down his sides, just enjoying the warmth, “I got a little chilly, last time.”

Crowley reached over and yanked the Devil’s chain, dragging him to the front of the throne. You twisted around to face Lucifer, now kneeling at your and Crowley’s feet.

“Good dog,” you smirked. With a flash of your fingers, the gag disappeared. Against your back, you felt Crowley’s chest rumble in amusement. He graciously handed you the chain. You took it, wrapped it around your wrist for better control, and gave an experimental yank. Lucifer’s face was pulled forward, toward your lap. “Oh, yes. This is perfect.” You leaned back against Crowley and he wrapped his arms around you, enveloping you in Hell’s warmth. “Thank you, my king,” you purred.

His hot hands snaked down over your breasts and stomach to your thighs, spreading them slowly, opening you up so Lucifer could get to the throbbing spot between your legs. As sullen and pouty as the Devil looked, his eyes also betrayed a hint of lust. That hint just needed to be exploited- encouraged. Crowley made a show of gently running his fingers through your folds, spreading your slick and making you whine and writhe against him. The hint of lust was starting to grow. Lucifer stared at your soft, exposed center. He licked his lips.

“You took something from my queen, dog,” Crowley said in his best Kingly voice, “You need to give it back. You will pay what’s owed.”

Lucifer was breathing harder, now, eyes still mesmerized by the glistening slit before him. You yanked the chain again, and when Lucifer exhaled, the cool air fanned over your heated flesh. His tongue flicked out and found your clit, again. The icy shock made you gasp and pull harder on the chain that bound him, pressing his face against your core. He gave up pretense after that.

As he set to his task, working against your skin, dragging along the soft openness, plunging into you, curling the forks of his tongue along your inner walls, spreading delicious stabs of cold from your center, Crowley kept you warm. The king caressed you with firey hands, twisted your nipples, breathed heat through you with his demonic power. Trapped between Lucifer’s ice and Crowley’s fire, you wallowed in Crowley’s lap and cried out with the sensations.

“Ooooooh, yes! So good, yes! More- more please…”

“There’s my good girl,” Crowley rumbled in your ear and raked his fingernails down your shaking inner thigh, “Would you like to come, now, Love? Would you like to come for us?”

“Fuuuuuck, yes!”

Crowley gripped your knees and opened you wider to Lucifer’s ministrations.

“As my queen desires.”

Phantom mouths clamped onto your nipples. Licks of hellfire chased along your your veins. And all the while, the Devil’s pulsing chill kept up its assault. You felt a pressure in your core. Deeper than Lucifer’s frenzied mouth could reach. Crowley. His power coiled and uncoiled inside you, the perfect balance to Lucifer’s biting cold. You felt your inner walls convulse around it, almost like Crowley was physically inside you.

“Oh, fuck yes! That’s gonna make me come- oh! Oh!”

When Lucifer sucked hard on your clit, and Crowley’s power throbbed against the corresponding nerve bundle deep inside, you screamed and fell apart. Spasms wracked you for what seemed like forever, suspended between the rulers of Hell.

As you came down, Crowley kicked the Devil out of the way and gently trailed kisses along your shoulder, his fingers ghosting across your pussy, smoothing away the chill Lucifer had left behind.

“That’s my good girl,” he murmured, “That’s my gorgeous queen.”

A few deep kisses later, when you were able to stand, Crowley helped you up, draped the sheet around you, and you both stood to regard your captive. Lucifer reclined as indolently as this bonds would allow.

“You sure you want to lock me away, again?” He watched you with hooded eyes and threw your words from yesterday back at you. “I’m more useful than I look, obviously.”

You cocked your head, studying him for a moment. It was easy to see the snake from the garden in this human shape. You smiled sweetly at him, and he lit with hope.

When the gag reappeared in his mouth, his hopeful look dissolved in shock.

Crowley laid an approving kiss on your throat, and moved to the altar in the shadows. As he began preparing the ingredients of Lucifer’s fate, you crouched down to glare at the Devil.

“Don’t confuse convenience with usefulness, boyo. You think everyone who shares my bed gets to stay there?” You huffed sardonically. “Just be glad you get to walk away from the encounter. Some aren’t so lucky. You’re a damn good time, sweetie, but you’re just not worth the headache. Carry memories back to your cage. And when you get lonely, trot them out and wallow in how you almost- almost- killed a queen of Hell. And may you rot, pining away for my pussy.”

With that, you stood and swept over to the altar. When you started chanting, you caught the Devil’s furious gaze and kept it throughout the spell. Finally, with a feral snarl on the last word, you watched as he was sucked back into the deepest crevasse of Hell.

You slumped forward when it was done. The exertions- both good and bad- of the past two days were catching up to you. Crowley wrapped a solicitous arm around you and nuzzled against your hair.

“Go sit for a bit, Love,” he said, nodding towards the throne, “Let me get you a drink.”

Forever Tags: @mamaredd123 @emilyymichelle @singingphoenix @motleymoose

Queens of Hell: @roxy-davenport @fuschiarulerinthebluebox

Just-this-once crowd: @scifinerd10 @fangasm202 @ilovelillies @shanty-lol @faeryprincess666 @cutebutnotinorcent @lucifer-in-leather @tema-laya @mona-stay @lucii-fer @nnegann @itstotalyblue @sirlsplayland

#crowley x reader #lucifer x reader #Crowley x Lucifer x Reader #Witch!reader #spn smut #Crowley smut #Lucifer Smut #spn fanfic

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astermacguffin · 3 years

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Okay. I warn y'all that this is very much a Poast™. This is another one of Those Poasts™. You have been warned.

I very much blame (affectionate) @autisticandroids for this, since this is pretty much me trying to combine as many concepts as possible from the #mpregpocalypse tag.

In this au, Cas is pretty much just collecting babies left and right. The following stuff are all simultaneously true in this spn mpreg rewrite:

- Cas absorbs the deanlisa baby and carries the child himself. This is his first pregnancy. This is also the most "monstrous" of his children because of the godstiel stuff and the leviathans.

- For maximum effect, I don't want Cas to give birth just yet. I want Benny to see Cas with the baby bump and put the dots together in his head. I want Cas to give birth alone, after Dean and Benny already went through the rift. I want Naomi to take Cas out of purgatory and leave his child alone there. I want Cas to grieve for the loss of his child when he remembers. (We'll go back to this in the future.)

- Dean fucks Casifer at one point and impregnates Cas' body. (I mean, with Casifer peeling off his layers and thotting up the place while in the bunker? Not surprising tbh.) NOTE. I wanna be clear with something: this baby is Dean and Lucifer's nephil. I mean, biologically it's a Destiel baby, but with Cas' grace growing weaker and him being possessed by Lucifer, in terms of grace this is pretty much Lucifer's nephil. (But also not??? Because what allowed the conception to happen in the first place is Cas wanting it SO BAD.)

- No one else notices the conception of this baby because Cas hides it within himself (the same way he did with the deanlisa baby) and pauses the pregnancy at will.

- When Cas meets Kelly, they are very much BOTH pregnant with Lucifer's kid. Remember that screenshot where they both look pregnant and bonding about their babies? Yeah, this is inspired by that. When Cas touches Kelly's baby bump and they like soulbond or whatever, Kelly looks at him and goes "oh you're pregnant too?"

- Cas tells him that it's Dean's child, but leaves out the Lucifer part. They already have one Lucifer nephil in danger, he doesn't need anyone else knowing this secret (especially since he hid the nature of this child so well for so long). Kelly thinks he's hiding it because of the Dean part.

- They both know Kelly's not gonna survive giving birth, so they already have a plan: Cas will transfer the pregnancy to himself when it's almost time for Jack to come out (the same way he did with the deanlisa baby). Cas is confident that he'll survive what Kelly cannot. (His hubris, of course, always tend to bite him back.) Dean, Mary, and Sam arrive just in time to see Cas pregnant and about to give birth. Kelly catches them up on the plot.

- Cas dies of childbirth due to an unexpected complication: the pregnancy transfer triggers the birth of the other child inside him, which makes him give birth to TWO children. The strength of the explosion unfortunately kills both him and Kelly, rendering Cas' sacrifice as pointless. (As much as I wanna keep Kelly alive, the point of this au is to inflict as much damage as possible)

- Lucifer and Mary still get stuck in Apocalypse world, and now Dean and Sam have to care for TWO children, one of which is Jack (who still grows quickly) and...another baby? They have no idea who the fuck this baby is until they find two videos: one made by Kelly and one by Cas (a backup plan they made just in case one or both of them don't survive).

- In the video, Cas reveals that the child is his and Dean's nephil (again, removing the Lucifer part). Dean just takes it in stride (since they had enough sex in the later seasons for it to be a genuine possibility) and takes Cas's word.

- In any other scenario, Sam would definitely be teasing Dean for impregnating Cas. But since Cas is dead and they're still grieving, he shelves this conversation for a future time. (With so much plot happening, Sam never finds the right chance and eventually just forgets it. He's just happy that he was right all along.)

- They agree to never let anyone else learn about the baby's nature, which the baby seems to understand as well, choosing to not manifest any angelic abilities. In fact, the baby internalized Cas' instructions to keep all their secrets under wraps that the kid goes selectively mute throughout the series. (I wanna see Eileen teaching ASL to the kid.)

- The two babies scenario works great for two reasons: it satisfies my "give Dean a baby" instinct (that pretty much drives my baby jack truthing) while still keeping Jack the way that he is in canon.

- Dean lets the baby rest on Cas' chest for a short while before wrapping Cas up with the curtains. Both Dean and the baby cry over the body.

- I want to give Jack as many Problems Disorders in this au. I want him to be jealous of the way Dean treats his twin (because they're pretty much twins, right? They have the same grace-father, they got birthed by the same body, so yeah).

- Dean treats the baby with as much care and love while still treating Jack like shit. Sam once calls him out on it and says "Dean, they're both Cas' children." Dean throws out an "I can hardly look at the freak" rant. Jack wakes up Cas from the Empty, yada yada.

More fucked up shit below the cut:

- I wanna keep this as close to canon as I can, so Dean would still exhibit suicidality before Tombstone. You would think that the baby would at least hinder this instinct, but he genuinely believes that he's poison and that everyone he touches dies. (And besides, Sam is good with both Jack and the baby so they won't need me anymore, right?)

- Cas comes back, and things mostly stay the same as in canon (except there's now a baby there, who honestly won't influence much of the plot until later). Dean never really apologized that much to Jack in canon (and I still hate it) but in this au, it would work perfectly. I want Jack to believe that Dean still sees him as a freak, even if he's a bit nicer now that Cas is back. (I can and will put my entire pussy into the Dean-as-John, Jack-as-Sam parallels.)

- When Jack kills Mary, Cas hides it from Dean and Sam. We're going full Torturewife on this one, folks.

- Jack's truth spell forces Cas to confess that (1) Cas hid the fact about Jack's soullessness; (2) Cas lied about Jack killing Mary, and; (3) the Destiel baby is technically a Dean/Lucifer nephil. Chaos fucking ensues.

- Dean has to confront the fact that both of the kids (HIS kids) are Lucifer's spawn.

- Chuck doesn't really care about the baby since it never manifested any powers (yet), unlike Jack (who is a genuine threat to him).

- Moriah happens, Jack dies. (And it's even more fucked up now because despite being soulless, Jack remembers all the insecurities he got from Dean. The "It's okay, I understand" line Jack says to Dean while having a gun pointed to him is sooooooo.) Rupture happens, their divorce is finalized and Cas takes custody of the baby.

- Cas having some father-child bonding with the baby as a breather between all this fucked up stuff.

- The Trap happens, they make up, and oh? Who's this person who helped Cas escape and get the flower? It's the deanlisa baby, but now grown! Together with Emma! She was thankfully found by her big sister, Emma, when she was a baby in purgatory. She had to grow up fast and now they survive together.

- After eating Eve in order to save Cas, the deanlisa child is now technically the new Mother of monsters. Dean explains the Chuck problem, so the two choose to come with them to help.

- Cas never really explained the deanlisa baby, huh? When they get back with their now grown child (and Emma, who doesn't really hold a grudge over the entire Sam killing her thing) and Cas explains, Dean is baffled but takes it in stride. I mean, they just made up! He doesn't wanna fight with him anymore and he wants the family together again!

- They make the two stay with the baby so they'll be safe in the bunker while they try to trap Chuck with the Mark of Cain spell. It fails, of course. (But hey, at least there was sibling bonding time in the bunker.)

- Billie brings back Jack and they formulate a plan (Billie doesn't go evil in this one btw.) They strengthen Jack, Jack knows that he'll be a bomb and is totally fine with it. "Maybe if I do this one good thing, Dean won't see me as a freak anymore." Remember, Jack internalized a lot of the shit Dean said.

- Cas attempts to call out the self-sacrificial bullshit and that Dean actually loves him, but Jack insists. "You would do the same! In fact, you have done the same! (In reference to the Empty deal, which still happens here btw.) I'm just learning from all of you." If there's one thing I'm obsessed about in fics, it's when Jack calls them out for learning martyrdom from team free will.

- Dean finds out about the plan and tries to talk Jack out of it. They have a heart-to-heart, Dean finally fucking apologizes for all the complexes that he's given Jack, and Jack (for the first time) finally believes that Dean doesn't see him as a monster anymore. Jack stops the process so he doesn't become a bomb (but at least he's stronger than he was before).

- They call Billie to come up with an alternative plan. She considers the options, and says an alternative plan would be harder and would require more players in the field. "As long as we don't have to sacrifice any of our loved ones anymore, we're good," Dean says. "I don't think that's an easy request, but we'll try," Billie says, giving a pointed look at Cas. (Hmmmm, wonder how this would come to play later?)

- Billie points out that the destiel baby is in fact not powerless, but is instead choosing to supress their own power. If the child can be convinced to unlock their own capabilities, then perhaps they might stand a better chance at winning.

- They spread out to gather more allies: Sam goes to Rowena, Dean goes to Michael, Billie goes to Gabriel (yes, he's alive here), and the kids stay in the bunker with Cas to try and explore each other's abilities. (Since I hated the Michael-Lucifer nonsense of 15x19, none of that happens here. Lucifer doesn't go back and Michael doesn't betray them.)

- Jack finds out that he can push out all the energy he gathered for the bomb into a one-time-use blast. They find out that the baby can apparently enhance the power of whoever they're holding. And the new Eve apparently has traces of Godstiel/Leviathan still in her after being in the womb with them. (She also spends the time catching up with Cas because they've not seen each other for years.) Emma is just vibing there, adoring her powerful younger siblings and interrogating her father's...husband? Boyfriend? Ex? (She's still confused about their status.)

- This goes just like in S11, and they go all out and attack Chuck together until he's weak enough for Death's scythe. There's one shot where the kids are just holding hands to power each other for Jack to deliver a fatal blow. Billie is just around the corner, ready for the final blow, when Cas turns to Dean.

- "Dean, I need to say something." Cue the 15x18 confession scene, except this time Dean knows about the deal now. So the moment Dean realizes what Cas is doing, he tries to stop him.

- "Stop, please stop. Don't say it, you don't have to say it." Because of course, happiness is in just being, it's in just saying it. And Dean knows what true happiness would do.

- But unfortunately, Cas has to do it. (Billie talked to him about it, and her scythe won't exactly do a clean job with something as powerful as a Chuck-Amara hybrid. I don't know when or why they fused together since the bomb plan was cancelled, but it happened here okay? Yeah. So they need something that is guaranteed to be older and greater than God or the Darkness—the Empty. Billie can only go there, but she can't summon it to be on Earth. Enter Cas' deal.)

- Cas says "I love you," Dean reciprocates, they share a final kiss, and then Billie finally reaps God. The Empty arrives to take Chuck, and Cas shares one final moment with his kids before accepting his fate.

- Billie goes to the Empty to make sure the job was done, and she finally gives the Shadow the sleep that she promised. She uses her scythe on the Shadow, because death is the final slumber. (Of course, you can't exactly kill nothingness; she only destroyed an embodiment/personification of the Empty.)

- Post-fight. They're happy because Chuck is finally defeated but also...Cas. Before they even have the chance to process what the fuck just happened, Billie is back and she has Cas with her. "I just put the Shadow into sleep, so it's not like anyone would notice," she says. The problem is that Cas is still very much asleep. (He still has some grace here btw. Maybe he's not at full angel anymore, but he's not fully human either. There wasn't a need to cut out his grace without warning.)

- Dean and the kids crowd Cas' body. The baby's touch on Cas's shoulder (which burns a mark that parallels Dean's) is what wakes him up. Reunion kiss!

- Happy ending! Michael (with Adam) goes back to heaven to fix things, and they are very much implied to be a couple. Midam rights babyyyyyy! Gabriel goes back to roaming the world and occasionally visits the kids.

- Sam and Eileen organizes a hunter's network and organizes a bunch of safety protocols and rehabilitation projects with the help of the new Eve (which most monsters obey, key word most). Oh, and Saileen definitely swings regularly with Rowena (and occasionally with Gabriel when he's around).

- Emma decides that she likes hanging out with the Wayward Sisters better (and you know what? Good for her). The new Eve decides to hang out there often as well (whenever she isn't busy with monster diplomacy or something).

- When Jack finally feels safe and peaceful enough, he reverts back to his child form. The baby, who has been selectively mute this entire time, holds their brother's face in recognition and utters their first word, which is "JACK!" Dean and Cas cry in joy over this entire exchange. (That's his twin! He missed his twin!)

- They move out of the bunker to get their own house by a lake or something. Whenever the topic of pregnancy comes up again ("Dean, when do you want another baby again?"), they can now playfully joke about it and Dean says something like "Don't steal someone else's baby again, okay? The next baby to be inside you needs to be mine." They're both stupidly horny about the subject, I hate them so much.

- Whenever there's an important event, they all celebrate it in the bunker for the extra space (because their family is, indeed, very large). END.

There's something poetic to me about the Empty being the one that beats Chuck in this mpreg rewrite because technically, the Empty is the Original Womb that gave birth to God. It it the nothingness of potential, the dark water of pregnant beginnings.

All this talk about the Empty and stuff also made me stop and think about the metaphysics of spn. The fact that the Darkness and the Empty are two distinct entities says something interesting about the metaphysical reality of spn. It doesn't treat darkness as a mere absence of light, a mere nothingness, but rather a thing/substance of its own. It's a very Manichean kind of metaphysics as opposed to a Platonic/Neoplatonic one. (Oh, St. Augustine would probably have a blast trying to unravel whatever the fuck is happening with spn.)

The fact that it's also Cas' free will that brought upon God's demise? Delicious.

(If you're still reading, congratulations for finishing my very long spn mpreg rewrite. Why did you do this to yourself tho.)

(also apologies if I didn't give a name to Jack's siblings. I haven't thought of a good name for them just yet)

#spn #destiel #mpregpocalypse #long post #literally what the fuck is this post #aster writes #spn mpreg rewrite #tw suicide #tw mpreg

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