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watermelonlovershigh · 1 year

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CAN U PLZ RIGHT SOMETHING ABOUT HARRY CANCELING THE SHOW AND BEING SICK. like he starts saying he feels sick after that show and the next few days it’s you taking care of him and he gets emotional cause he feels like he let everyone down when he cancels it🥹🥹

AN: i love this and had this in mind before you requested it but you requesting it just pushed me to actually write it. hope you enjoy.

This story contains: (some) puke, crying, sickness in general, fever, comfort, fluff

{ boyfriend!harry - current harry era - softrry }

word count: 2,462

Harry tries to hide the fact he feels sick for a few days until after his performance on Wednesday night where the truth comes out and he finally allows you take care of him.

Harry felt fine on the night Harryween took place. He was full of energy and even went out to a Halloween party after the show still dressed in his Danny Zuko costume. The following day he didn't have a concert but he did have a My Policeman movie premiere to attend that night. Meaning he got to sleep in with you, his girlfriend, until around noon.

At the movie premiere Harry started to notice his limbs feeling weak and his head starting to ache but he ignored it, thinking he may still be a bit hungover from the Halloween party last night. After the premiere he asked if you could drive home because he just felt too sleepy to drive. That's when you had your first inkling something wasn't right. Harry normally never asked you to drive. Especially in LA traffic.

On the drive home to your shared Los Angeles home Harry passed out in the passenger's seat. His head rested against the cool glass of the window and his legs curled up in front of him. You thought he looked adorable and so relaxed but still had that worrying thought that something wasn't quite right with his behavior.

When you arrived home from the movie premiere Harry jumped in the shower and then rushed to get into bed. Whenever you asked if something was wrong he'd just say he was tired and a little hungover from the partying the night before, but you knew that was unlikely the case because his hangovers never last that long. You just tried to ignore your worry for your boyfriend of four years and cuddled him close as you fell asleep together.

The next morning Harry felt even worse than the night before. At this point he internally knew it wasn't just a two day hangover and that it must be him coming down with a sickness. But he knew in order to not let the fans down tonight he must power through the day and give it his best on stage tonight. Luckily whatever bug he'd caught was a slow sickness, meaning even though he felt sick on the inside, the outside of his body didn't present many symptoms yet. Therefore he could hide the fact he was sick for a while longer.

But you knew. Being in a relationship with him for so long you knew when Harry was sick. And you knew he was trying to hide the fact he wasn't feeling good. You allowed this to happen throughout the day because you didn't know just how bad he was truly feeling. You thought at most it was just a little cold coming on, not that he had the flu or anything.

Harry did manage to power through the day and get ready for the concert like he normally does. The crew and his bandmates suspected something was off with him because he didn't talk and make jokes like he normally does but they didn't say anything on the matter. Even Jeff saw how Harry was acting but choose to ignore it because he knew the show must go on, well at least this concert did.

You stood where you normally stood at your boyfriends concerts and watched as Harry got on stage and gave it his best. But after the first song you could hear his voice giving out. And when Harry spoke into the mic for the first time that night his voice cracked and sounded so hoars that it made you feel physically sick to hear. Other than his speaking voice sounding bad when he talked and not really being able to hit all the high notes in his songs, Harry still sung beautifully.

You along with his manager and friend Jeff who stood beside you, assumed his voice was the only thing giving him issues on the stage. Little did everyone else know that Harry was struggling in many other ways. His head was pounding and the bright stage lights wasn't helping with that at all. It was actually making him feel a bit dizzy and nauseous. Then his limbs begun feeling heavy and weak like it did at the My Policeman movie premiere last night. He just wanted to be done performing and crawl into your arms for you to hold him.

It wasn't until Harry skipped his normal little speeches and jumped right into singing again that you KNEW Harry wasn't feeling good at all. At this point it was painful for you to just stand there and watch the last part of his show. So you left early and headed back to his dressing room. You begun packing all your belongings that you'd brought to the venue this evening so that you could leave shortly after he was done on stage.

Not even fifteen minutes later Harry comes bolting in his dressing room and sprinting off into the little bathroom to the left of the room. You stand from the sofa you were sat on and quickly follow him in to make sure everything was okay. As soon as you step inside you see Harry hovering over the toilet, projectile vomiting into the once clear water. "Oh, H!" you mutter as you rush to stand behind his trembling body and run a hand up and down his sweaty clothed back. You didn't realize his stomach was also bothering him.

After what felt like minutes of him puking and dry heaving into the toilet, Harry finally felt his stomach settle and he grabbed a wad of toilet paper to wipe his nose and mouth with. Then he tossed the dirty tissue in the toilet and flushed before he was sick again. He stood up on shaky legs and walked over to the vanity sink to wash the hands that had been gripping the sides of the public toilet.

"Babe, I knew you felt sick but I didn't realize your tummy was feeling sick too." you say in a quiet and calm voice.

Harry turns to you with red, water eyes, from the throwing up and on the verge of actual tears, and replies in a voice almost unrecognizable, "It's not. S'just, m' head is throbbin' and the lights, the stage lights, they...... it was makin' me dizzy and that. Then towards the end.... the dizziness on top of my headache made me very nauseous. Glad I made it in here on time. Really thought I was gonna be sick in front of everyone there for a second."

You step forward and wrap his tall body in a hug. You don't care that he smells like a mixture of sweat and puke, you know he needs this hug right now. Standing in the small bathroom of his dressing room at the Forum, you hold Harry's body tight, well not too tight, and he rests his head on your shoulder. Feeling your warm embrace and knowing he finally and somewhat successfully made it through tonight's concert was just too much and that's when he lets out a sob.

"Baby, H, it's okay. Can you tell me what's wrong? I know you haven't been feeling well today but I wasn't sure what all was bothering you and I can't help if you don't tell me." you whisper while rubbing your hands up and down his back, still holding him to your chest.

Taking a deep breath to try and form some words, Harry whispers back, "M'head hurts s' bad. And.... *sob* and my arms and legs feel s' weak. M'tummy feels better now and until the stage lights started botherin' me m'stomach hasn't bothered me at all today. Think throwing up was a one off thing, thank god. And I'm just s'tired." As you take in this information you carefully lead you both back into the dressing room and onto the couch.

Gently unwrapping his arms off from around you, you settle him in the cushions of the sofa and state quietly, to not disturb his pounding head, "Okay, it's all gonna be okay. I'm gonna go tell Jeff what's the matter and help you out of your clothes to give to Harry Lambert and then we'll head home. I'll take care of you, alright. No need to cry anymore." Harry just nods and sniffles as his way of letting you know he understands what you'd said. It hurts him to speak so he's trying to limit the amount he does say.

It only takes you about five minutes to go explain to Jeff what all is wrong with Harry and then make it back into the dressing room where he's nearly dozed off to sleep. You help him strip from his stage outfit and hang the clothes up for Harry Lambert to see. Then you dress him in some comfy sweats and a hoodie. Harry's shivering even though he's still sweaty from stage which lets you know he most definitely has a fever as well.

With all your bags in one hand, your other side is preoccupied with Harry's body leaning on you for support as you walk out to the back parking lot where your vehicle sits. Luckily no paparazzi is back here and you're able to help settle Harry into the passenger's seat before getting in yourself and driving off towards your home.

Forty-five minutes later you arrive to your Los Angeles home and help a sleepy and sick Harry out of the passengers side door. You leave your bags in the car for now so you can solely focus on getting him inside and taking care of. You'd come back out to grab them later. You help walk him up the stairs and into your bedroom where you help remove his clothes and lead him into the shower.

In his croaky voice, Harry whines, "You're not gettin' in with me?"

"Did you want me to, babe?" you ask softly. He just nods his head and that's when you start to strip out of your concert clothes to join him. Any other day Harry would be getting hard at the sight of you stripping naked in front of him, knowing you're going to shower together, but he feels so sick that that's the last thing on his mind. Once you're completely bare, you open the glass shower door and join your sick boyfriend in the steamy shower.

Though for Harry the warm water feels so good on his freezing body, he's feeling worse and worse as the night goes on and you can see that. So you quickly help wash his brown curls as well as his fever ridden body. He groans every now and then from you accidently bumping into his sore skin. His entire body feels like it's one big bruise at this point. Then you quicky wash yourself off as he sits on the shower bench, waiting for you to finish.

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Finally, just finally at one in the morning Harry gets settled into the comfort of his own bed. He is thankful that he got sick during his residency in LA where he actually has a home instead of having to stay in some hotel room. It's much nicer this way. You tuck him into the covers, making sure there aren't too many layers because you don't want his fever to spike higher. Though you did only dress him in some boxers. Then you go down stairs to grab him some medicine for him to take. As well as grabbing your bags you'd left in the backseat of the car earlier.

With your bags set in the fourier and a glass of water in one hand and some medicine in the other hand, you pad your way back up to your bedroom. You have to gently wake Harry up from his ten minutes of sleep so he can sit up and take the medicine. He protests but eventually complies. Once the medicine is in his system, you turn all the lights out and climb into bed as well.

You were gonna slide over and cuddle into his body but Harry beats you to it. Harry slides over to your side of the bed and lays his damp head on your left shoulder and tosses one leg over your waist. Then falls into a deep sleep immediately.

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All day Thursday Harry tried to get proper rest and take all his medicine to be well before the next night, which is concert night. You stayed by his side and took care of all his needs. You don't mind though. You love taking care of Harry, whether he's sick or well.

But when Friday morning came around, Harry still just felt awful. He had a cough and his throat was very painful, making it hard to talk or swallow. You knew for a fact there was no way he was going to be able to perform tonight but Harry insisted he'd feel better by the evening. Little did he know you'd called his doctor to make a house visit while he was napping and after his little check up, he was diagnosed with the flu.

His doctor told him that if he wanted to get better quickly that he doesn't need to get on stage tonight and he should rest for the next few days. This crushed him. Harry was going to be letting down so many fans that had traveled to his show and paid money to see him. After you helped him notify Jeff and his bandmates of the issue and the need to cancel his show tonight, you helped him type out his note for his fans and the public to see.

As Harry told you what to type out on his instagram story, he couldn't stop crying. He felt so bad for letting everyone down and was devastated he couldn't perform tonight like he wished he could. You had to keep taking breaks from typing the cancellation notice to comfort Harry and remind him that he'll be sicker if he keeps crying like that.

Once you'd finished and posted the post, you turned off Harry's phone so he couldn't lurk at any negative comments he may receive from rude fans that just didn't understand he couldn't get on stage sick. Later you'd allow him to view the nicer and more positive comments. The ones wishing him get well soons and such. But right now he needed to get more medicine in him and go back to sleep if he wanted to be better in time for the next show that wasn't postponed and rescheduled in January.

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(PLEASE REBLOG BECAUSE WRITING IS NOT EASY AND IT’S FREE SO JUST DO IT)

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My Masterlist Masterpost

#harry styles #harry styles sick fic #sickfic #harry styles fluff #boyfriendrry #boyfriend!harry #softrry #soft!harry #harry styles comfort fic #harry styles fan fiction #harry x reader #harry styles sick #harry styles one shot #one shot

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em-dash-press · 1 year

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Ways Emotions Impact Your Stories

Let’s talk about the weight and purpose of emotions in fiction.

Stories can feel poorly written and even shallow if the reader can’t emotionally connect with what the characters are experiencing. It’s the emotional equivalent of hearing someone talk in a conversation and then hearing them read out loud from a sheet of paper.

Those two types of vocal inflections and emotional engagement are very different. The same thing happens when a writer creates a story without effectively utilizing emotions to engage their reader and drive the plot.

While I was reflecting on the power of emotions in fiction, I thought about how they impact stories. You might find some writing/editing/plotting inspiration in these reminders:

Emotional payoff sometimes requires hints, foreshadowing and visible effects to build to the payoff.

Example: Your protagonist may need to experience breadcrumb doubts, tension-building fights, and conflicted feelings to lead to a breakup that’s a turning point in your plot.

Immediate repercussions happen due to emotions. Sometimes that’s physical (smiling when happy, crying when sad) and sometimes it’s between characters (falling in love after displays of kindness, a change in plans after something makes your protagonist panic about what they want for their future).

Like character foils, emotions can have contrasting feelings.

A YA protagonist may love their parental figure, but also hate them when the parental figure imposes restrictions on their independence. The contrasting emotional state drives their character growth, the relationship arc, and potentially how they understand relationships outside of their home.

Emotions have implications. People don’t feel things for no reason. The motives or reasons for emotions help your plot move forward.

Example: Your character is bored because they’re procrastinating a big decision or they’re cranky because they’re burnt out and don’t realize it yet.

Characters have certain emotional reactions based on their differing morals, which adds depth to your story (or potentially conflict).

One character might get mad that a student was suspended for showing up late due to oversleeping because they know it’s a side effect of the student’s new medication. Another character might be a strict rule-follower and say that the school had no choice. The conflict could drive them apart or make your reader feel a certain way about them that gets the reader closer to your story’s message.

Emotions are the hook of every story (and you may need to pick a specific one if you feel like your story doesn’t have a good hook).

Example: if the first chapter of The Hunger Games started with Katniss hanging out with a friend and going to sleep at the end of a standard day, it wouldn’t set an emotional stake. Instead, it grips the reader by demonstrating how family is all Katniss has (emotional on its own) and then rips the family apart at the reaping (the fear of losing a loved one is a universal emotion/experience). Readers instantly feel their hearts break for Katniss and want to find out what happens after her fear instigates a seeming act of self-sacrifice.

Revising or writing your work with one, two, or more of these ideas in mind could make your WIP the quality you’re trying to reach. A lack of emotional depth and purpose keeps your readers at arm’s length. Invite them in for an incredible read by writing emotions on purpose.

#writeblr #writing emotions #writing tips #writing advice #writers of tumblr #character development #plot development #writing a good hook

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astromechs · 11 months

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Has it ever been said why there was the need to make Thanos sympathetic in the first place? Meaning has anyone behind the mcu talked about the thought process?

I ask because the build up in mcu to Infinity War didn't seem to be going in that direction. Definitely not after vol 1 where we learned more about Gamora and Drax's history. Then suddenly they went the direction of maybe he had a point. Also they leaned into population control themes as a justification for genocide which I felt was troubling. Particularly with real world issues around similar subjects. The framing of the people on Gamora's planet as more primitive and struggling and Thanos coming in to fix it felt really off. Infinity War started out giving Gamora a voice and a well structured and acted look at the emotional toll her life with Thanos had. Then suddenly switched it up to frame him as having validity. It's interesting to me which bad guy characters creators will work really hard to make sympathetic and which characters will suffer the consequences.

It's also interesting to look at how fans reacted to Gamora's death with more than a few being willing to dismiss what it meant for her to only focus on Thanos. I saw way more people being adamant she needed to stay dead for the good of the story than some of the other characters who died except maybe heimdall who a lot of people seemed to ignore in general.

Fast forward to vol 3 and now I see more people coming to sympathize with Gamora's death in Infinity War when it comes to Peter's reaction and actions. What it means for Gamora however still doesn't get the same level of consideration. I have noticed that people are quick to view her actions in vol 3 as being evil or unacceptable, though her behavior was pretty understandable for the situation she was in and no more bad than behavior we have seen from characters like Rocket, Yondu or even Nebula in the past. There's also debate about whether she should count as a guardian, which I guess people can feel how they want but the standards for behavior and meeting the criteria to be included seem to be higher for her. Some people I interact with in fandom who felt they could at least understand where Thanos was coming from act like Gamora is too hard to identify with and she's the victim.

Sorry this is long and likely not as articulate as I was going for. But all the new gotg commentary has me curious about why they needed Thanos to be sympathetic and how that's reverberated through fandoms feelings for Gamora.

the russos had it in their heads that they wanted to create "this generation's darth vader" without actually understanding what makes darth vader a great and enduring character. like, that's essentially it.

what makes vader a great character and a great villain is that the story humanized him in a way that didn't make excuses for his atrocities. the reveal in the empire strikes back that he's luke's father... well, it's still the best twist in cinema history, because it turns the whole story on its head without compromising the integrity of it, all of vader's actions are cast in a new light, and you see there's a man inside that machine. return of the jedi really succeeds in driving that home by having vader sacrifice himself in the struggle against the emperor to save luke for a really effecting conclusion.

nowhere in there did giving vader humanity ever suggest he was actually right for destroying alderaan with the death star, or for torturing leia (who would turn out to be his daughter!), or for slaughtering countless people, or for supporting and enabling the fascist regime that is the empire.

and hell, your mileage may vary on the star wars prequels (personally, i love them — yes, even attack of the clones, which i objectively know isn't a good movie!), but what they manage to do by going into anakin's past and how he becomes vader further serves to humanize him without trying to say his actions are the right ones. the scene in attack of the clones where he slaughters an entire village of tusken raiders for killing his mother is framed by the film as something horrific; the same is true of the scene in revenge of the sith where he kills the younglings in the jedi temple and the whole third act of the movie that primarily deals with his descent into darkness. anakin's story is a tragedy, and we're meant to feel the weight of that, but we're also not meant to agree with his actions or his point of view.

that's where infinity war gets it completely wrong with thanos. and i know, i know, the movie intentionally framed him as its protagonist as a narrative device — and that's something that could be done well, but wasn't. and again, friends, let's remember that protagonist =/= hero (which i don't think the russos/markus and mcfeely understand lol), protagonist literally just means what character is principally driving the action of the story. there are countless examples of stories where you're meant to understand the protagonist but not validate their actions; hell, the anakin example from the star wars prequels above is one, as well as stories like bojack horseman, succession, etc etc and so on and so forth.

where infinity war particularly messed up on this, imo, was having the soul stone validate thanos's murder of gamora as a "sacrifice" and actually giving him the stone. that was bad on a lot of levels, and really led to a lot of people having the attitudes that they do. and, just, in general, there are a lot of reddit bros ready to chime in and agree with someone spouting a bunch of thomas malthus-esque rhetoric, people just willing to accept what happened to gamora because, you know, misogyny, and voila. you have mcu thanos and his shitty legacy enduring.

#asks #anonymous #GHHGHGHF THIS WAS ALSO LONG #the wrong lessons were also learned for the sw sequel trilogy for kyle ron but that's another rant for another day :')

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thatshitkrejci · 5 months

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I do not entertain thoughts of a One Direction reunion; I feel hysterical when I take the premise seriously and then deflate when I consider whether I would have fun seeing Louis and Liam in concert these days. I’ve made my peace with the unique moment that was following 1d, culminating in the release of their final album, Made In The A.M. (MITAM), in November 2015.

1d is fun pop music. From a critical perspective, the vocals are strong to middling (sorry Up All Night and Take Me Home era Niall and Louis), and the instrumentation is rarely interesting or challenging. It’s hooky radio-pop, and if you let it sweep you up you’ll find yourself driving with your best friends, car windows down, shrieking “it’s gotta be yooooooououoUOOUUUUUU.”

1d entered an “indefinite hiatus” eight years ago. Since that time, the back half of MITAM has been my favorite run of 1d songs to revisit. I think many of these songs are their best. Some may argue these songs cannot be their strongest because Zayn isn’t involved. The truth is, MITAM includes the most cohesive sound and technical chops of any 1d album; it benefits from the band’s years of experience as artists and increased creative control over writing and production. With a run time of 58 minutes it is too long, which is perhaps why I prefer to revisit its last 10 songs and not the first 7.

But this isn’t meant to be a retrospective album review. What I’ve been thinking about is the feeling of hearing new music from a band for what you are certain is the last time. Knowing the band was ending made many lyrics from MITAM feel too literal (oh, why you’re wearing that to walk out of my life?) as the band crooned about loving you goodbye and giving it to you one last time.

When I hear the last ten songs off MITAM, I tap into the emotions I felt when I first listened. The end of the album takes you on a journey through acts of nature, longing, and demographic-appropriate lustiness. It’s a frenzied finish about holding on, wishing you didn’t have to go, and promising to find each other in the next life. It’s easy to imagine them writing this album about the end of your own relationship with Liam, Harry, Niall, and Louis (and maybe Zayn too, depending on how much you’d processed his exit months prior).

The lyrics of Walking In the Wind felt insane in context. How else am I expected to take a wistful song about missing what you had but knowing you’ll always have memories of the good times?

You can insert yourself as the main character of any 1d album with countless songs about desperate love and broken hearts. But these songs felt personal and pointed to me. At the time of its release, I could not help but read them as both a goodbye to the band and to the band’s relationship with its fans.

You know I’m always gonna look for your face. You can call me if you need me. We could live forever. It’s never enough.

Last First Listen: Reflections on One Direction's final album (formatted version)

#one direction #1d #made in the am #4/5 #🚲

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blondrichclosetwitch · 8 months

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Matthieu Ricard is an ordained Buddhist monk and an internationally best-selling author of books about altruism, animal rights, happiness and wisdom. His humanitarian efforts led to his homeland’s awarding him the French National Order of Merit. (Ricard’s primary residence is a Nepalese monastery.) He was the Dalai Lama’s French interpreter and holds a Ph.D in cellular genetics. In the early 2000s, researchers at the University of Wisconsin found that Ricard’s brain produced gamma waves — which have been linked to learning, attention and memory — at such pronounced levels that the media named him “the world’s happiest man.” He was also late for our Zoom, and it was driving me nuts. Didn’t he get my confirmation email? Why hadn’t he emailed to say he was running late? I had deadlines! Tight deadlines! My carefully planned schedule was being shot to hell! Alas, everything turned out fine, as it was always going to. Clearly, I had much to learn about taming the mind. “You should not get quickly discouraged,” said Ricard, whose memoir, “Notebooks of a Wandering Monk,” is forthcoming. “You cannot master playing the piano now. These skills take time.”

OK, so I’ve been meditating twice a day for probably 15 years, and I feel as if it has improved my ability to control my thoughts and emotions instead of letting them control me. But still sometimes I’ll walk by a mirror and have an extreme flash of self-loathing. Or I’ll get all agitated over something stupid, like finding a parking spot. Will that stuff ever go away? Well, they can. Absolutely. You know, once I was on the India Today Conclave.1 They said, “Can you give us the three secrets of happiness?” I said: “First, there’s no secret. Second, there’s not just three points. Third, it takes a whole life, but it is the most worthy thing you can do.” I’m happy to feel I am on the right track. I cannot imagine feeling hate or wanting someone to suffer.

It’s not the best thing to say, but I can easily imagine wanting certain people to suffer. How are we supposed to deal gracefully with our polar opposites in a world that feels increasingly about polarities? I mean, the Dalai Lama could talk to Vladimir Putin all he wants, but Putin’s not going to say, “Your compassion has changed me.” Once, a long time ago, someone said to me, who is the person you would like to spend 24 hours alone with? I said Saddam Hussein. I said, “Maybe, maybe, some small change in him might be possible.” When we speak of compassion, you want everybody to find happiness. No exception. You cannot just do that for those who are good to you or close to you. It has to be universal. You may say that Putin and Bashar al-Assad are the scum of humanity, and rightly so. But compassion is about remedying the suffering and its cause. How would that look? You can wish that the system that allowed someone like that to emerge is changed. I sometimes visualize Donald Trump going to hospitals, taking care of people, taking migrants to his home. You can wish that the cruelty, the indifference, the greed may disappear from these people’s minds. That’s compassion; that’s being impartial.

But why does compassion have to be universal? Because this is different from moral judgment. It doesn’t prevent you from saying that those are walking psychopaths, that they have no heart. But compassion is to remedy suffering wherever it is, whatever form it takes and whoever causes it. So what is the object of compassion here? It is the hatred and the person under its power. If someone beats you with a stick, you don’t get angry with the stick — you get angry with the person. These people we are talking about are like sticks in the hands of ignorance and hatred. We can judge the acts of a person at a particular time, but compassion is wishing that the present aspect of suffering and the causes of suffering may be remedied.

What are the limits of compassion? Could blowing up a pipeline be a compassionate act? Well, we discussed a lot in those meetings with the Dalai Lama at the time of Kosovo what we call “surgical” violence.2 But the problem is if it triggers a chain reaction, leading to escalation from both sides. Also, if the barrel is bad, all the apples get rotten, so the system has to change. You can see that with this deep divide now in the United States based on ignorance. Delusion is a cause of suffering. If you could get rid of that, that will alleviate suffering in many forms.

For a while now, people have been calling you the world’s happiest man. Do you feel that happy? It’s a big joke. We cannot know the level of happiness through neuroscience. It’s a good title for journalists to use, but I cannot get rid of it. Maybe on my tomb, it will say, “Here lies the happiest person in the world.” Anyway, I enjoy every moment of life, but of course there are moments of extreme sadness — especially when you see so much suffering. But this should kindle your compassion, and if it kindles your compassion, you go to a stronger, healthier, more meaningful way of being. That’s what I call happiness. It’s not as if all the time you jump for joy. Happiness is more like your baseline. It’s where you come to after the ups and downs, the joy and sorrows. We perceive even more intensely — bad taste, seeing someone suffer — but we keep this sense of the depth. That’s what meditation brings.

Do you ever feel despair? There’s no point. We can feel sad if we see suffering, but sadness is not against a deep sense of eudaemonia,3 of fulfillment, because sadness goes with compassion, sadness goes with determination to remedy the cause. Despair: You’re at the bottom of the hole, there’s no way out. That’s fatalism. But suffering comes from causes and conditions. Those are impermanent, and impermanence is what allows for change.

Your response to my question about despair was, “There’s no point,” which suggests that you’re making conscious choices about your feelings — whether to follow them or not — based on their perceived value. That’s not something everyone is able to do. Short of also becoming a Buddhist monk, how might other people start developing the ability to control their emotions like you can? Emotions are just like any characteristic of our mental landscape: They can change. We can become more familiar with their process; we can catch them early. It’s like when you see a pickpocket in a room: Aha, be careful. Twenty-five hundred years of contemplative science4 and 40 years of neuroplasticity — everything tells you we can change. You were not born knowing how to write your columns. You know it’s the fruit of your efforts. So why would major human qualities be engraved in stone from the start? That would be a total exception to every other skill we have. That’s why I like the idea of Richard Davidson’s5 that happiness is a skill. It can be deeper, more present in your mental landscape. We deal with our mind from morning to evening, but we spend very little attention on improving the way we translate outer conditions, good or bad, into happiness or misery. And it’s crucial, because that’s what determines our day-to-day experience of the world!

But if I were explaining that to someone, they still might say, OK, how do I change? Is the answer as simple as “Just start thinking about compassion”? When you are in that moment of unconditional love — say, for a child — this fills our mind for 30 seconds, maybe a minute, then suddenly it’s gone. We all have experienced that. The only difference now is to cultivate that in some way. Make it stay a little longer. Try to be quiet with it for 10 minutes, 20 minutes. If it goes away, try to bring it back. Give it vibrancy and presence. That’s exactly what meditation is about. If you do that for 20 minutes a day, even for three weeks, this will trigger a change.

Who gets on your nerves at the monastery? My nerves? Once in New York, when I was promoting one of my books, a very nice journalist lady said, “What really upsets your nerves when you arrive in New York?” I said, “Why do you presuppose anything is upsetting me?” It’s not about something being on your nerves. It’s about trying to see the best way to proceed. Paul Ekman6 once asked me to remember when I got really angry. I had to go back 20 years: I had a brand-new laptop, my first one, in Bhutan, and the monk who didn’t know what it was, he was passing by with a bowl filled with roasted barley flour and spilled some on it. So I got mad, and then he looked at me, and he said, “Ha-ha, you’re getting angry!” That was about it. I get indignation all the time about things that should be remedied. Indignation is related to compassion. Anger can be out of malevolence.

Not to reduce 2,500 years of contemplative science to a single sentence, but is there a thought that you can suggest to people that they can carry in their minds that might be helpful to them as they go through life’s challenges? If you can, as much as possible, cultivate that quality of human warmth, wanting genuinely for other people to be happy; that’s the best way to fulfill your own happiness. This is also the most gratifying state of mind. Those guys who believe in selfishness and say, “You do that because you feel good about it” — this is so stupid. Because if you help others but you don’t care a damn, then you won’t feel anything! Wanting to separate doing something for others from feeling good yourself is like trying to make a flame that burns with light but no warmth. If we try humbly, with some happiness, to enhance our benevolence, that will be the best way to have a good life. That’s the best modest advice I could give.

What’s the wisest thing the Dalai Lama ever said to you? I remember I came out of this one-year retreat to take care of my father.7 At the same time I was interpreting for the Dalai Lama in Brussels. So I told him: “I’m going back to the retreat. What is your advice?” He said, “In the beginning, meditate on compassion; in the middle, meditate on compassion; in the end, meditate on compassion.”

Sorry, are you wearing an Apple Watch? Yes.

Why does a Buddhist monk need an Apple Watch? I walk in the forest. I try to count 10,000 steps to be healthy at 77 years old. I don’t do many interviews anymore, but when I do, I usually don’t put this on, because the first thing the guys say is “Why do you have an Apple Watch?”

I realize this is a question that no one on the path to enlightenment would ask, but broadly speaking, am I on the right path?

You? Yes. [Laughs.] I mean, I cannot make a clinical examination, but I feel that you resonate with ideas which are dear to me. So that’s a good sign.

I’ll take it! If you had said, “Oh, that’s all rubbish” — you know, once there was a French journalist, very cynical, and he said to me, “This thing about becoming a better person and all that, this is the politics of the hash trade.” I don’t know what he meant. But what I said was, “My dear friend, if genuinely trying to become a better person and do a little good — if that’s the politics of the hash trade, I’m happy to spend my whole life in the hash trade.”

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toriluv607 · 1 year

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How to Be More Feminine And Why It’s a Good Thing

Why you should Embrace your feminine side

Young women are no longer being taught how to be more feminine. And it’s because of one of the most glaring problems I see in our culture today. A complete lack of appreciation for femininity. Instead; being loud, aggressive, unkempt, and promiscuous are traits that seem to get praised. We are being told that behaving this way is what will make you a strong woman. Behave this way and you can have it all.

What if I told you that you could be feminine and still be considered strong? And that having it all shouldn’t really be something a lady would even want to aspire to. Being a feminine woman is about not needing to constantly be the center of attention. It’s more about thinking about other peoples’ comfort in any situation. To live the motto of hospitality in all parts of your life.

Traits of Femininity

I think before we continue we should probably define the traits of a feminine woman. These are just the basics as there are many traits a feminine woman can have. Also, every woman is so unique and may embody different aspects of being feminine. But I think these are a good foundation to start with.

•Practices Politeness

•Does not engage in promiscuous behavior

•Modest in manner and dress

¥Nurtures her family and home

•Cares about the comfort of those around her (hospitality)

•Continually strives to better herself

•Refrains from gossip and malicious activities

•Strives to be gentle and kind

•Makes a conscious effort to not argue with or demean her husband

•Uses reason to make her point, not emotion or a shrill voice

•Understands that being a lady means giving men a reason to strive to be gentlemen

These are just a few of the key traits of what it means to be feminine. I can assure you by no means do I live up to all of these. But I strive every day to practice more of these traits in my own life. This is where grace comes in. But I truly believe that if more women practiced even a few of these traits the world would be a much better place.

Why should you Want to be more feminine

So that brings me to why should I want to be more feminine? The simple answer is by being a woman it is in your biology. Women and men are not only built physically different but their chemical make-up is different as well. As I’ve stated before in my article “How to Survive as a Traditional Homemaker in The Age of Third Wave Feminism”, we are not equals, but rather complementary. How that is controversial is beyond me. A woman should not strive to do everything a man can do, because she was designed to do everything he can’t. That being said, I firmly believe that under the law we should most definitely be treated equally.

There have been some studies done recently that show some interesting trends when it comes to choices the genders make when everything is completely equal. (You can read about these fascinating studies here & here.) In countries where the maximum amount of effort is made to have enforced equality (ie: affirmative action) across the entire culture, the division of the sexes becomes even more pronounced instead of less. Meaning women choose more typically feminine jobs and men stick to more typically male type occupations. It is our biological nature that drives us and to deny that is folly. We were created to fill specific roles and that is where we do best. There are always exceptions to the rule but for the most part, women will almost always voluntarily choose to be nurturers.

A Medieval Example of Why It Pays to be More Feminine

A long time ago when I still did medieval re-enactment (yes, I did that) a female friend of mine asked why the guys always treated me differently then they treated her. I didn’t have the heart to say it was because she acted more like one of the guys. I hadn’t really thought about it. But when I went to events I really played up the role of a lady. And not surprisingly I was treated as such by even the gruffest males in our group. This is one of the benefits of acting like a lady. No matter your social status, looks, age, or intelligence; if you act like a lady you’re more likely to be treated like one.

Don’t like to wear dresses, can I still be feminine?

Yes, yes you can. Even though how you dress does have an impact on your femininity, it is ultimately more about how you present yourself. And even more so about your behavior. I know some very feminine women who wear jeans, t-shirts and work hard on their homesteads. But they still manage to present themselves as very feminine.

One of my all-time favorite examples of true femininity is Audrey Hepburn. That woman was strong, kind, compassionate, elegant, and her beauty came from not only her appearance but from within.

Tips for Being More Ladylike

There are many things you can do to be more feminine. I would try to do one of these things at least once a day. Just like any good habit, it takes time to develop. And before you know it you’ll be a real lady in no time.

•Either take the effort to do your hair, wear a little makeup, or wear a nice outfit every day for a week. You can do one or all depending on your comfort level. I always feel so much more cheerful when I do this.

•Practice doing one kind act a day. Whether that’s volunteering locally in your community, doing something nice for a family or friend, going out of your way to help someone you know who could use help, or saying something kind to a stranger.

•Learn one new thing every day.

•When you find yourself getting frustrated or angry with your spouse or someone close to you, stop yourself and ask is it worth hurting them to be right? Think about how much you love them. And instead of arguing kiss him on the cheek or hug them and tell them how much you value them. And then leave the room before you say something you’ll regret.

•Try to be more aware of your posture. Carry yourself lightly, raise your head, maintain eye contact when you are speaking to people, sit up straight in chairs, and cross your legs at your ankles. Not only will better posture be good for your health it is also a way to project a more feminine demeanor.

•In our modern culture sometimes we forget to use better manners. I know I do on occasion as well. Try using better manners for the day. You should always chew with your mouth closed, say please and thank you, be polite to others in public, and try to refrain from being crass.

Be Feminine and Strong

I truly feel that when we strive to be more feminine our lives as women become more beautiful. We don’t face nearly as much strife as when we are crass and aggressive. It’s like the saying goes,” You attract more bees with honey than vinegar”. Ultimately I have lived two different lives; one where I was progressive and way less feminine. And now, where I aspire to be more ladylike. I can honestly say I have always been treated more fairly and kindly by all when I chose to be more feminine. When people see that you always try to make sure that those around you are comfortable and taken care of, they have more respect for you. They see you as a strong feminine woman. And being more feminine can only be a benefit to you, your family, and your community.

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workofheart · 3 years

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levi ackerman relationship hcs

some modern headcanons, nsfw below the cut <3 it’s just levi brainrot at this point

definitely the type to follow (stalk) your spotify and check in to see what you’re listening to. if he has the time, he might even listen along and wonder what you’re doing. if it’s a particularly sad song or series of songs, he’ll know to send you a text to let you know he’s thinking of you

on that note, he also stalks your pinterest boards just to see what you’re into these days and (idk abt yall but i save pins of mens fashion) if he sees a cute outfit in your saves that fits his style, he might even try it out. reason being (though he’ll never admit to it) he loooves that kind of attention from you - when he looks particularly good and you can’t stop staring, it might just pull a smirk out of him

once you’re living together, he lowkey acts like a dad. might scold you for not closing doors, not turning off lights, all the like. he means well, honestly

however, doesn’t mind tidying up for you. folds your laundry, clears your plate, takes your jacket off your shoulders when you get home, just because it’s his way of showing he cares. definitely an acts of service kind of guy

really good at cooking! he likes spending days in the kitchen with you while he whips something up or tries something new and you just sit at the counter and talk to him. it’s a good way to catch up as your adult lives can sometimes get busy

if you fall asleep with earbuds still in, he’ll gently take them out for you before you go to bed <3 he’ll also plug your phone in for you if you forgot

occasionally reads aloud to you, especially if you’re having trouble sleeping. we all know he’s not much of a talker, but his voice is so relaxing and he doesn’t mind doing it if he knows it will help

the chillest, coolest boyfriend ever. he’s so mature, honest, and trusting, and you don’t have to worry about those high school dramatics when you’re dating him. when he chooses to date you, he’s serious about it - definitely not the type to just date for fun. he won’t hesitate to deny advances from other people, doesn’t care about what you wear, just fully devoted to you and wouldn’t even think about anyone else

i also think that with that dating in general, you would probably start out as acquaintances or maybe even friends. he needs to have a lot of trust in the person he chooses to date, so only after he’s known you a long time and you’ve made enough of an impact on his life for him to make it hard to let you go would he date you

speaking of, didn’t isayama say that levi would stutter around his crush? i can imagine him stumbling over his words, trying to cover it up with a cough, reaching to scratch his neck all sheepish, just getting all shy. even once you’re far past that stage of your relationship, sometimes you’re so upfront and bold, he can’t help himself :( you just make him so weak

braids your hair for you when you’re too tired to do it yourself - you’ll sit in front of him and his fingers are so gentle with your hair 🥺 he got the hang of it so quickly and has the dexterity to not tangle your hair and it always comes out so nice and clean, even if you’re just going to sleep in them

i peg him as a biiiig cuddler. not a lot of pda besides holding your hand, wrapping his arms around your waist, letting you hook your arm around his, etc., but in private he loves when he can just lay his head on your lap or chest bc then you can play with his hair, which relaxes him

he’s really intuitive and in tune with your emotions. if you’re feeling down, he’ll know, and he’ll also know if you need space or if you need comfort, both of which he is more than willing to oblige

he’s there to bring you cups of tea, maybe some cut up strawberries on the days you’re tired and want to sleep. will definitely tuck you in, and will also lay down with you for a bit if you ask

his go to way of getting you to talk is going on drives. 1) levi is a really good driver and 2) he’ll usually come and find you wherever you may be around the apartment, say something along the lines of, “i’m going on a drive, you wanna come?” or might just give you a look and jingle the keys around his fingers

it might take a little while of rolling through the backroads aimlessly for you to speak up, but when you do, he’s all ears. lets you talk through your thoughts, might prompt you further, offers advice if you ask for it. it’s also how you sort through relationship misunderstandings - they are rare, but all relationships have them, so it would be silly to present your relationship without them

i think that when levi is upset on the other hand, he’ll usually come to you for comfort. he isn’t necessarily looking for advice, but just to calm down and rest. some form of physical touch is good, like cuddling or napping, preferably where he can put his head on your chest so you can play with his hair

i think levi is the type of person to get a lot of intrusive thoughts or memories that he doesn’t really want to remember when they pop up, so having you as a distraction to hold him and let him know it’s alright is something he really appreciates

nsfw below the cut (18+)

unpopular opinion: levi is NOT the hard dom people tag him as. rather, i think of levi as a service top, so while he may be carrying out more of the work, you’re the one in control. getting you off gets him off 100%

considering he is usually very dominant outside the bedroom, he likes the opportunity to let you take control and direct him instead - it takes a weight off his shoulders

slow and smooth kisser. might put up a fake fight for dominance just to make it more fun, but eventually take the lead and kiss him dizzy

hearing your moans makes him unbelievably hard. the sounds you make go straight to his dick

and so: godly at giving head. he might edge you but it’s not to tease or as punishment, he just takes his time because he knows it feels better for you, and at the end of the day he wants you to feel as good as possible. your pleasure is his main priority.

knows how to use his fingers, knows how to use his tongue. knows what you like and picks up on it very quickly. i don’t think he’s that experienced but he’s got a good natural sense of what feels good - do not doubt him, he knows where the clit is

he’s got a very wide range of capabilities for this, too. he can go slow and sensual on a calm sunday morning or absolutely dive in and ravage your pussy for more intense sessions - this is the one time he doesn’t mind making a mess

making you cum is good for his self esteem/confidence lmfaooo he lives to see your flushed cheeks and heaving chest and be told he’s doing well. when you scratch his hair or cup his cheek as a quick thank you, his heart swells and his dick twitches

please kiss his neck, he will absolutely melt for you. especially the next day when he looks in the mirror and notices the little love bites you left him... he runs his fingers over them lightly and his eyelids get a little droopy as he remembers everything, will definitely seek you out for another round

tbh i don’t think he’s that kinky. he likes what he likes, i can’t imagine him comfortably degrading you or hitting you or anything like that. realistically, levi wouldn’t be having sex with someone he’s not in a committed relationship with. he wants it to be special and personal and therefore probably would not enjoy treating you poorly even if just for the sake of sex. if anything, he wants it the other way around bc he could easily be a bit of a masochist in bed

loves when you restrain him and ride the shit out of him, either by tying his hands to the bed or just pinning his arms down. likes when you “use” him to get off. put your hands around his neck and he’s putty in your hands

really loves when you tell him to cum - your voice is music to his hears and to hear it out loud and as a command has him doing exactly that. he’s not one to disobey orders lol.

his brows furrow, his eyes squeeze shut, mouth falls open and lets out a low moan... jesus christ

one more deep kiss, a quick clean up, and then he’s passing out with his head on your chest. after-sex sleep is some of the best rest he’s ever gotten

#levi ackerman x reader #aot x reader #snk x reader #levi ackerman fluff #levi ackerman smut #levi ackerman imagines #aot imagines #snk imagines #levi x reader #levi fluff #levi smut #aot headcanons #levi ackerman hcs #levi hcs #levi headcanons #levi ackerman headcanons

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getouswh0re · 3 years

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pairing: clan head megumi x reader

genre: yandere, power impact, manipulation, unhealthy relationships, friends to lovers turned wrong, slight manga spoilers

synopsis: you’ve learnt not to test megumi’s limits, especially when he becomes the head of the zenin clan

****************************************************

With the two of you raised by none other than Gojo Satoru himself, Fushiguro Megumi and you have been extremely close throughout the years; despite not being related by blood, he would still treat you dearly, making sure that harm wouldn’t come your way.

While you appreciate everything he has done, at times warning bells would set off in your head whenever Megumi is being way too overbearing; you know for a fact that he cares about you, but your conscience reminds you that however nice his intentions could be, there are certain boundaries that shouldn’t be crossed.

The number of occurrences when he trails after you is already uncountable on its own, not to mention how he questions everything you do even though it’s technically none of his business. You’ve tried to hint at him that his actions are a bit too much at times, hoping the young man would respect your privacy and personal life.

He apologises profusely afterwards, promising he would tone it down. But of course, with his tenacious personality, Megumi will not give up. Not when it’s someone he considers his lover a pseudo-family member.

He could hear his heart shattering the moment you shyly tell him that he could be a bit too much sometimes, such words being way beyond what he could handle. Do you not love him? How could you do that to him, when he offers you his heart and soul? The world is a dangerous place, especially with curses and how his sister ending up bedridden because of a curse. It is justifiable that he protects you with whatever means possible, right?

As the two of you grow up, the relationship dynamics shift. You have lost count of how many times you have turned a blind eye to his advances and subtle hints on how the two of you would’ve been a wonderful couple. It is not like you hate him; Megumi is truly a wonderful person of good morals, complemented with his good looks, he is one that would be sought after by the ladies.

Nonetheless, the raven doesn’t even spare a second to bat an eyelash at the ogling stares every time he is on the streets, ignoring whispers of admiration that ring in is ears incessantly. After all, he only has eyes for you only.

So it is devastating when you reject his confession on a certain day, telling him that while the two of you may be close, perhaps it would be better off if your relationship stays this way, that you and him aren’t the one for each other when it comes to love.

He tries to numb the pain; yet no matter what he does, the void in his chest would invariably be there, reminding him of the brutal rejection.

For once Megumi’s walls finally crumples to dust and releases all of his bottled-up emotions by crying until his throat is sore and his eyes puffy. You are all that he has apart from Tsumiki, he can’t just let you go, not when you are just within arm’s reach.

And the mentality finally hits the raven hard: if he couldn’t have you, then nobody else can.

The two of you remain close, but unknowingly, Megumi starts to manipulate people in your life. With his intelligence and connections (courtesy of Gojo), having you all to himself is simply a matter of time.

Eventually, your friends distance themselves away from you, and your employers from your part-time jobs fire you out of no reason; not knowing what is with their abrupt hostility and the unexpected plummet towards rock bottom in life, you find yourself crying into Megumi’s chest in the early hours of morning, venting about how nobody wants you and life is a bitch.

Being the only one you could rely on at this point, he puts on his act perfectly, comforting you with hugs and soothing words of comfort, reminding you that no matter how difficult circumstances could be, you could always depend on him no matter what.

Perhaps you are wrong after all, a thought crosses your mind; perhaps Megumi really is the right one for you. Of all the people you know, he is the only one remaining by your side, being your anchor through highs and lows. What more could you ask from his unconditional kindness?

And so the raven’s dreams finally come true as you confront him tearfully, telling him how you’ve realised he is the one for you, accepting his confession again.

Megumi struggles with his emotions, but he would always do his best to make you smile. Playing all the cards of a romantic boyfriend, the sorcerer pulls you closer and closer, like a spider luring its prey into the web. He is the only one who could make you swoon, whom you would have a family and grow old with together, who is your soulmate. For a long while the relationship is stable as ever, but a crack starts to form after a certain incident.

Ever since your boyfriend becomes the Zenin clan head, matters take a bad turn for you, and it would only be a matter of time until you unveil Megumi’s true colours.

It all starts with your promotion towards a grade 1 sorcerer. You have been looking forward to this opportunity for years since it would help the two of you to sustain a living. You know Megumi has acquired a large sum of money ever since he becomes the leader of the clan, and life would be lavish for both of you. Still, you prefer to earn through your own blood and sweat, much to the raven’s displeasure. That’s why you keep insisting on taking the mission that would impact your promotion towards a higher rank.

However, your promotion has been revoked at the last minute without proper reasoning; and after doing some digging, you are beyond enraged when you find out the one who caused all of this is none other than Fushiguro Megumi himself, thus leading to the first huge fight between the two of you.

“Megumi. What the fuck? I just want to get promoted to a higher rank because it would make life easier for the two of us! What about living expenses and the bills we need to pay? I’m not going to sit still and spend your family money!”

“Why can’t you just rely on me, love? I’ve done so much so that both of us could have a better off life than before. Now that I have in command of the clan and the money on my hands, what is the need for you to work and potentially hurt yourself? Are you trying to hurt me again?”

Obviously, tension remain rigid between you and him. But it only takes a word from you that drives Megumi over the brink of sanity.

“We need a break, perhaps you and me really aren’t right for each other.”

He is not going to let the same thing happen twice, is he?

So when you find yourself denied of any promotion and struggling to find other side jobs to sustain your own living after moving out of your shared apartment, you know for a fact that the raven has been pulling the strings behind the scene again, forcing you to come to the realisation that you would never survive in the world unless you go back to his side.

Begrudgingly, to Megumi’s delight, you finally return to the home you once shared with him after six months.

In time, as a glimmering platinum band sits snugly on your ring finger and Megumi’s calloused fingers lovingly caress your growing belly bump, you are ascertained that your fate would be sealed forever.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #yandere jujutsu kaisen #yandere jjk #yandere jujutsu kaisen x reader #yandere jjk x reader #fushiguro megumi #fushiguro x reader #yandere fushiguro #yandere fushiguro megumi #yandere megumi #yandere megumi x reader #megumi headcanons #megumi imagines #megumi scenarios #reader insert #x reader

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weareallstardustfallen · 3 years

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hello empiresblr i have watched pix's video and i am, once again, back with analysis, because this is just my life now. today's thesis:

pixl and fwhip are narrative foils.

there's a lot of similarities between them, both as characters in the narrative and their role with that and just in general. pixl even pointed out some of them today: they've got similar philosophies when it comes to making use of the corruption, and they're both the kind of extra that it takes to put elder guardians under sausage's base. they play off of each other really well, and it's very fun to see, but i'm getting off topic bc a good dynamic does not a narrative foil make.

their role in the narrative is really mirrored, especially in their character development. towards the beginning of the story, fwhip was one of the main antagonists, alongside sausage; that's obvious from all of their interactions during basically everything preceding the peace ravine. pixl, on the other hand, was quite firmly on the protagonist's (jimmy's) side, and that was also abundantly clear. it was fairly unambiguous that fwhip was an antagonist who was doing bad things, and pixl was a character who was unconditionally on the protagonist's side.

and then the story got complicated, and their dynamic got interesting; specifically, when it came to the dragon fight.

fwhip was, for what's basically the first time (iirc) acting as a heroic figure. he messed up by sending jimmy into the end, sure, but as soon as he realized that he started thinking about what he could do to make sure that the dragon didn't die, and immediately gave back the cod head and apologized, sincerely, to jimmy. it may have been somewhat caused by his own fear of xornoth, but regardless of his motives, he did everything right. if we look at who the protagonists seem to be for this arc; it's less clear than before, but i would say scott and shubble, and of course the anti-xornoth side of things more generally; he was aligned with the protagonists.

pixl, on the other hand, was working against the protagonists. he was trying to kill the dragon, and though he wasn't villainous in the way that Sausage and Joey were in that interaction, he was definitely acting in the interests of the main big bad. unintentionally, perhaps, but he was told that he was doing something that was wrong and he chose to ignore that. it's sort of similar to how fwhip was acting as an antagonist, except for their intent; pixl didn't know the consequences of what he was doing, and he was just trying to get home, but regardless the similarities are there.

like fwhip, pix had a moment of realization that killing the dragon was wrong, but his came after the dragon was already dead. he didn't have the chance to immediately backtrack and mitigate the mistakes he'd made, because it was a bit of a pandora's box situation; you can't shut that once it's open.

(also, unrelated to the thesis- i think it's very interesting how fwhip, of all people, is the one he called out for during his vision. mr riffs explain)

his reaction is different to fwhip's, though, in what i find to be a very interesting way! both of them share the fact that they are so protective of their citizens, and care a lot about keeping them safe- it's obvious with just about everything pixl's done since the dragon fight and how every action seems to somehow lead back to the good of pixandria, and fwhip is often worrying over and checking in on his villagers, like after he returns from the dragon fight, and after the test subject dream (thank you birch for the reminder on that one!) and both of their reactions lead back to that same protectiveness. but where fwhip's reaction is action- building up the empire to keep them safe- pixl's is overwhelming guilt. he acts, with the ghast farm and solidifying his alliances and working towards taking down sausage, but the core emotion that is driving him right now is guilt.

another point- their major mistakes in the dragon fight come down to what they know really well, and how in that moment, their knowledge fails them.

pixl is really, really good at knowing how the world works. in every interaction, he always seems to be the one who knows the specifics of the mechanics they need, and the one who is teaching the person he's talking to- he's very confident in his knowledge of what makes the world tick, and exactly how to utilize that. of course, this could come down to pixl as a player having a lot of knowledge of the game's mechanics, but i'd also point towards things like the vigil- pix is a very experienced character, as well as minecraft player.

and in the dragon fight? he knows he needs to get home, and get his allies home. he knows that to avoid dying in the void, the dragon needs to be killed. he knows how to kill the dragon. his logic leads him to a very clear conclusion, and one he's absolutely certain of- but he doesn't quite account for all the factors. he doesn't realize that xornoth is another concern, and he pays for it.

fwhip, on the other hand, seems to really get people. this is actually most clear in his first act interactions with jimmy- he's fantastic at knowing exactly what buttons to push, how to needle at him until he gets the reaction he wants. it carries over to his interactions with others, too, which is what makes him such a good manipulator. he knows what makes people tick, and how, if he so chooses, to exploit that.

and his fatal flaw in the dragon battle, just like pix's, is the fact that this knowledge isn't quite enough, or he's too certain of himself without knowing the consequences. he knew exactly what to do to send jimmy into the end- he was dead certain, and right, that jimmy would walk into a trap if he thought he could get the cod head back as a result. the problem was, well... he didn't think that jimmy would be dedicated enough to kill the dragon once he was there. he knew jimmy would take the bait; he didn't know he'd follow it that far.

a final note, which i think is probably less intentional (although you never know, they're very clever writers) but is a pretty bit of poetry- the vigil and the deepslate redstone sort of mimic each other. they're both something with a power that hasn't been or can't be quite explained, but is incredibly central to their empire and their character, and they both consider themselves sort of protectors or shepherds of it, in a sense. there is also a nice visual mirror there- a dark stone and a light stone, each full of lights.

conclusion: this story is so much fun to analyze and also gunpowder boys my beloved

#WHOOO that was a long one #pixlriffs #fwhip #empires smp #empiressmp #empiresmp #esmp #empiresblr #empires smp analysis #mcyt #rain chatter

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yourmcu · 4 years

Text

Emotional Support Mode

Pairings: Tony Stark x daughter!reader

Summary:

in which the reader is the loner, antisocial daughter of Tony Stark and the other Avengers including her father never acknowledge her presence (they thought some sort of interaction made you uncomfortable) so she becomes friends with Friday instead - Tony probs finds out and it’s gonna be all cute n fluffie once he realizes -

Word count: 2,243

a/n: hi just wanted to write fluffy tony :)) also I used they/them for friday’s pronouns

Warnings: angst n fluff, friday’s a bit more advanced (not like they aren’t already but) bc they could almost act like a literal human here.

read it on ao3!

You arrive back at the Avengers facility, shoulders slumped and just tired in general since you have a lot of homework and projects to do from school, most of them due by the end of the week. You also have exams later in the week.

“Hey, Fri,” you huff as you make your way to the elevator.

“Welcome home, Y/N. Where do you want to go?”

Yes, you're very close with the A.I that they started calling you by your first name. “To my room - and uh, will you remind me to read two chapters in my history book after I’m done with all my homework? I also have this project, I just need some measurements later, if you don’t mind.”

“Sure thing.”

“Thank you.”

It’s going to be a long night, you sigh heavily just thinking about it. Now you’re probably wondering, ‘you live with the Avengers! Why don’t you ask Tony and Bruce for help? Maybe Steve and Bucky for your History test?’

Yeah, well... you barely talk to any real person you live with. Maybe it’s you, you always thought you're making the team uncomfortable. You don’t even talk to your own father often which is kind of depressing on your part.

You love them, they’re like your extended family, but it just isn’t working out. Maybe they just don’t like you. Up to this day you still wonder why Tony took you in when you were just a baby (you were a mistake from one of his one night stands) - he had the choice not to.

“I’m assuming you zoned out again. You have arrived to your room five minutes ago.” Friday announces.

“Y-yeah sorry,” you shuffle out of the elevator and swiftly head to your bedroom, closing the door behind you.

“I also asked if I should inform Mr. Stark that you have arrived home.”

“No, no thanks. He’s busy and... probably wouldn’t care anyway,” You mutter the last part as you pile the books you need on your desk. “Can you put my study playlist on, please?”

----

“What time is it, Friday?”

“7PM. I was about to remind you to take a break.”

You get up from your chair and stretch, halfway through the last of your homework which is a two page essay. “You’re too kind, thanks pal,” when you walk out your room to head to the kitchen and grab a snack, the lounge is empty, kitchen empty,

“The team’s on a mission? I thought they had the whole week off,” you say before gulping down a water bottle.

“I checked the security footage: they left about an hour ago. Captain Rogers was talking about getting dinner.”

You put the bottle down. “Oh,” you try to mask your disappointment. This isn’t your first time being alone, they always left you here when they had a mission of course but... well, it’s not like they want you around them. “I’ll - I’ll just make myself something later, then. Not a big deal. I have to study anyway.”

Another hour later, the Avengers are back. They're all conversing happily as they pile in the lounge. Peter's rambling about upgrades for the Spiderman suit while Tony's typing away in his phone, nodding at everything he says. Everyone else is arguing about the TV channels and talking about the new restaurant they ate at.

Rhodey shifts, looking around. “Why do I feel like we forgot something?”

Natasha looks at him, waiting for him to go on.

“I assure you, I brought Mjolnir with me this time.” Thor butts in.

“No not that, what time does Y/N get home from school?” No one answers. It’s not like any of them know. It's natural that Rhodey would be worried about his goddaughter (even if they rarely talk). He turns his head to his best friend who’s now walking away with Peter, an arm around his shoulder. “Tony, where’s Y/N?”

He doesn’t hear since he has his full attention on his protégé.

“I’ll start making this tomorrow, I guess. I still have to buy materials.” You mumble to yourself, but you hope Friday's listening to everything you say just to make you feel less lonely. You swipe the hologram of the blueprint away and place the thick books in front of you.

“I would like to recommend a suitable study plan.” they state.

You rub your eyes, sighing, “I’m already halfway, I would’ve considered it earlier though.”

“This is only a recommendation, feel free to ignore it.”

You push yourself away from the desk and mutter a “go on,”, fiddling with your pen.

“Asking Mr. Rogers and Mr. Barnes would give you more details for your History examination, since the pair were originally from that time period. The same goes for Mr. Banner for your Science examination, I believe he has seven Ph.D’s, you may also approach Vision for the same topic. Mr. Stark has all the necessary materials for your project in his lab. Would you like me to-”

If only it were that easy. It should be easy, the thought alone makes you really nervous. “No, I - I appreciate the recommendation, Friday, but - I think I can do this on my own.”

“But you’re tired and it is almost midnight. I would help you myself but you specifically told me not to.”

They’re not wrong. Your eyes are starting to droop and you barely understand anything you're reading. You're also fighting back tears - why is talking to your family so hard?

“I can sense sadness. Would you like me to activate emotional support mode?”

“Yeah, okay. That sounds great right about now.”

----

“Crap. Guess we lost track of time again, kid,” Tony wipes his hands with a rag while he looks at the time on his computer. “You better get home. I’ll send May a text for keeping you this late.”

“Okay, thank you Mr. Stark. I’m just gonna use my suit-”

“No. Happy will drive you.”

Peter knew better than to argue and insist so he just nods and smiles sheepishly. A minute later Happy came ‘round to take him home.

Tony turns back around. “Friday, make a new project for me please, I’m adding minor upgrades to the Spiderman suit.”

“Not now, boss.”

Oh. He did not expect that. “Excuse me?”

“Y/N is currently opening up. I would like to give her my full, undivided attention. Please come back after fifteen minutes or so.”

Tony doesn’t exactly know how to feel about that. He never sees her outside her room anymore that he kinda forgot she existed tonight - oh fuck, they didn’t bring her to dinner with them.

“Well,” he exhales. “What is she saying?”

“That would be an invasion of privacy.”

“I’m her father-”

“Are you, sir?” Friday’s clever remark makes him stop abruptly.

It’s pretty clear that he’s been a shit father. Not only does he ignore you all the time but he treats Peter way better than his own flesh and blood. The Avengers on the other hand, they were nice people, but just didn’t understand so they try their best to get out of your way.

You were afraid of rejection, afraid to interact, because you had no idea what everyone thought of you. Did they like you? Did you make them uncomfortable? Did they want you around? What about Tony, did he really want a daughter in his life? Because you noticed he’d be better off with a son, yeah, like Peter goddamn Parker.

Tony sighs, walking out of his lab and heads to the mini bar to grab a drink. He needs to think: there's absolutely nothing wrong about you, he just didn’t do his job right, you thought he didn’t care, you thought nobody did. Even Friday is turning against him, doing a better job of comforting and being there for you.

“God, I’m such an asshole,” he mutters to himself, rubbing his forehead. He drinks his last shot and heads to the kitchen. “She still awake?” He calls out.

“She is.” Friday has a bitter tone.

He's hesitant to ask again, feeling really bad for not knowing this simple question - “what’s her favorite beverage?”

----

“How do you feel?”

You sniffle. “Well y’know, better than before. I should probably go to sleep. Thanks, Fri.”

“You’re welcome. Also, Mr. Stark is outside your door.”

“W-what?” You put away your books and straighten up, rubbing your damp eyes. “You’re serious? Okay, uh, let him in?” It's more of a question.

“Alright.”

You turn to face your desk as Tony enters the room, holding two steaming mugs. He sits at the end of your bed, just right next to the chair you're sitting on. “Hi,” he gives you a small smile and hands you a mug.

What’s the occasion?

“What’s this?” You ask quietly before taking the mug from his hands. Tony's being gentle and soft, it's odd but you’re not complaining.

“Green tea with honey. I... I thought I saw you make that stuff once.” He says, not mentioning the fact that Friday told him that.

“Oh, well, yeah,” you take a small sip. He added a bit too much honey but other than that it was good. “I thought you preferred coffee, though,”

Tony shrugs, his eyes glistening when he looks at you. “Wouldn’t hurt to try something new.”

“Did - did you want something, Dad?” You always found yourself awkward, couldn’t even make conversation with someone for long, always wanted to get straight to the point so it could be over with.

He looks like he wants to say something but he just averts his gaze to you, his hands, the floor, then suddenly he leans in and hugs you. Your feel your heart swell and body warm up, it’s a new sensation for you after all, you rarely get hugs from people. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “For everything. I’m such a bad dad, I don’t deserve you. I even forgot you when we went out to dinner.”

“You don’t have to be sorry for anything. I had loads of stuff to do earlier anyway, so, but yeah I was just - I just overreact, I’m sensitive. I don’t blame you and the others for not liking me, I know there’s nothing like-able about me, I’m not like Peter-” You ramble, tears now leaving your eyes again.

“Sweetheart, don’t say that,” Tony says as he pulls you closer to him, head resting against his chest while he rubs your back comfortably. “Y/N Stark, you are smart, brilliant - I was just an ass for not acknowledging that.”

“I know you’re just saying that to-”

“Oh, but I’m not,” he now places his hands on your shoulders, getting you to look at him. “Tell me who built their first engine when they were eight?”

You blush, “Dad-”

“No, come on, I wanna hear it.”

“I did.”

“Yes you did. And who made a completely functioning robot at their middle school science fair that blew all the teacher’s minds?”

You’re trying to hide a smile, recalling the memory, “I did.”

“And who,” Tony gets up and walks to the bulky looking thing that you covered with a sheet, pulling it off, “is currently building a computer from scratch?”

“Dad! That’s still a work in progress,” he messily places the sheet back and chuckles.

“My point is, you’re a clever and talented girl, Y/N. Don’t bring yourself down. And you don’t have to be shy around your family, those idiots have been dying to get to know you but since you don’t talk much... they don’t want to force it. We love you,” he says. “I hope you forgive me ‘cause I really wanna make it up to you. I’m not calling Peter in for a few weeks.” Tony sits down beside you again.

You couldn’t believe he’d do that for you. “You don’t have to, if you need him for something then-”

“-then you could help me instead, if you’re up for it.”

“I’m really sorry for being such a lonely freak,” you yawn, getting back into Tony’s open arms. “I love you.”

Tony tucks you in and lies down beside you, “I love you tons, kiddo.”

You snuggle into his chest, feeling his steady breathing while he rests his chin above your head.

----

It's morning. The Avengers are gathered at your open bedroom door.

“Are you getting all of this, Friday?”

“Yes, Ms. Romanoff.”

“Steve turn that shuttering sound down!” Natasha hisses at the super soldier who's doing his task, taking pictures.

Steve almost drops the phone and has Bruce fix the volume for him.

They’re all watching you and Tony cuddle together, still fast asleep.

“Do we have to stay here until they wake up?”

“Unless you have a great way of waking them up, yes. Now shut up.”

“If you think about it we definitely look creepy right now.” Sam comments.

“It’s their fault for having the door wide open all night!” Clint says.

Tony's actually awake the whole time, listening to them bickering. “You have three seconds to get the hell out of here before I make all of you polish my suits.” With that, the team races down the hall, pushing each other to get away first like literal children.

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still-a-morosexual-help · 3 years

Text

OBEY ME! LESSON 60 DETAILED SUMMARY + DISCUSSION/THEORIES

*I wrote this days after the lesson was first posted and never bothered to go back and edit it so meaning there will be me theorizing about the next lesson as well

*I write a small para for each chapter and I write it immediately after finishing that chapter so there’ll be theorizing about the next chapter too

*I swear more than usual here

*Some of the dialogue is heavily plagiarized and a few is lifted directly from the story, the game is to figure which is which.

*Summaries and Discussions/theories for all the other lessons can be found on this blog under #obey me spoilers or #my theories or #my headcanons

Welp this is it… DAMNNNNNN the last two seasons each had a lesson near the beginning of the season dedicated just to a date with Mammon and I’m praying S4 has one as well and though it sucks Mammon & MC’s hellos and goodbyes are always really sweet and ahhh how am I already missing them. I’m desperate for S4 and I haven’t even finished S3 yet… fuck okay.

Post Lesson 60 edit: The last chapter goodbyes are gonna be direct quotes cause I’m an emotional mess.

As MC is about to head outside Mammon calls out to them and tells them to bring him a cake on the way home, they ask him why he’s been so cold and distant with them lately and he frowns at them and says he doesn’t know what they’re talking about and tells them not to forget the cake and then he leaves. Asmo who had being eavesdropping laughs and says that even for Mammon that was oddly bossy and arrogant. He then asks if he can tag along with them partway cause he’s heading to the spa. As they walk past the lake Asmo tells MC not to hold Mammon’s recent attitude against him and that he’s so upset about having to leave MC again that he doesn’t know what to do with himself and since rn all he can think about is MC he’s not sure how to act around them. Asmo says Mammon’s spending too much time dwelling on this. He looks disappointed and shakes his head when he asks himself what he’s gonna do about Mammon and that he’s being a child. (IS2G Asmo is the number #1 Mammon x MC shipper???????? Relatable) MC asks him if he hasn’t been dwelling on leaving. He asks if they wish he was and says they’re always on his mind and that’s why he doesn’t seem any different now. He says the actual reason he’s still so himself and not outwardly upset is cause he has faith (HA!) that they’ll end back together again like all the previous times they had to separate. He says he’s still sad about having to say goodbye but all that makes him want to do is treasure the moments they have rn. They can hold his hand, kiss him or say that’s a really Asmo thing if him to say. He smiles and says positivity is one of his charms (Asmo ily but weren’t you the one who got drunk and cried and needed to have Satan carry you back home the first time MC left…) They eventually part ways. I’m guessing the order of the rest of the ‘goodbyes’ is gonna be Satan, Mammon and then Lucifer cause those two always end up last in that order…

EYYYYY! They run into satan and ask where he’s off to. He says he’s off to the bookstore to stock on some human books before they head home and asks MC if they want to tag along. He hands them a list and tells them to start looking from the top and that he’ll start from the bottom. He says thwy can use magic as long as no human sees them (ME: thinking back to that one human MC, Belphie and Diavolo scared the shit out of…Hmmmm). They agree and he says that knowing they studied under Solomon makes him feel safe to trust that they know what they’re doing. He says he always knows he can count on them when he needs them and that being in the Devildom without them will be troublesome (I said in the fairy dust/angel lesson that Satan & MC are incredibly similar and that their friendship is highly underrated and I still stand by that.) MC uses magic to lift a book from a high shelf and Satan warns them that someone’s coming making them loose their concentration and the book to come falling down, Satan shields them though and gets hit with it instead. They each ask if the other is alright and he says they need to be more careful that no one sees them (ME: INTENSELY THINKING BACK TO THAT TIME WITH DIAVOLO AND BELPHIE WHEN MC WAS WILLING TO BARBEQUE A MAN FOR FIRING A GUN AT BELPHIE) He blushes and tells them he’ll show what he means and he takes them behind a bookshelf where no one can see and wraps his arms around them and pulls them close (Satan what kinda romance novel pickup line was that??? Also all I can imagine is that SNL bookstore skit with John Cena & Aidy Bryant). MC can kiss him, wrap their arms around him or just thank him for shielding them earlier. He says there’s no need to thank him and that he’s just happy they’re not hurt, He then laughs softly and asks if they’ll be okay once he’s gone. They ask him in turn if he’ll be okay. He blushes and says he won’t and that just thinking about life without them was enough to drive him mad.

At dinner levi asks if everyone is there and Beel looks sad and says Mammon isn’t, Belphie sighs and says he always has to make things difficult. Levi says it’s okay and he gets it and that Mammon obviously thinks dinner’s gonna suck since Levi made it and holy shit can we pls take Levi to a therapist pls? Belphie says Levi’s beating himself up for no reason and Levi goes on a rant about how he’s an ultra-negative, depressing otaku and how no one likes being around him ajndsvddjsnk LEVI pls!!? (unrelated but Levi’s actually my third favourite) Belphie asks MC to go get Mammon and Beel tells them to hurry. They knock and enter his room. They ask him what he’s doing and he says he was just watching a shark movie Satan gave him. He asks if they’re here to tell him about dinner and that they should head back and eat and not to worry about him. He looks upset and says he’s not in the mood to eat. They say they’re really gonna miss him and he’s eyes widen for a sec before he looks away and asks if they’re some sorta kid. He then laughs though and says they’re not the only one who feels that way. He blushes and says of course he’s gonna miss them too and that they already knew that. He asks if there isn’t some other way for them to stay together forever. He says that being a sorcerer they have to make something happen. They can say a.) that despite being a sorcerer they’re still pretty green and he laughs and says the one time he needs them they’re no use at all. He blushes and tells them to hurry up and ‘ripen’ and that a green sorcerer won’t cut it. B.) being a demon he should make something happen. He says if there was something he could do he woulda done it a long time ago. Looking aside again he says hanging out with them and talking about dumb stuff is something he takes for granted and he just realized he won’t be able to do it again anytime soon, he says that once he’s back in the devildom life would be dull and that once he used to be happy as long as he had money but after they met that was ruined. And now during his free time he thinks about them and feels all worried and unsettled. He blushes and asks them to stay with him and keep him company since all this is their fault. Belphie texts them asking where the fuck they are they say they’ll have dinner with Mammon later, he then wishes them luck with Mammon.

In the music room Levi’s bemoaning how he understands that any coffee he makes won’t be good enough while a wide eyed Asmo asks him what he’s talking about cause as you can see Asmo is drinking his coffee, Levi says he never admitted it was good though. Asmo smiles and reassures him that it’s actually good and asks Belphie to back him up. Belphie says he wants no part of any of this which immediately crumbles all of Asmo’s hard work and makes Levi depressed. Lucifer pops his head in and once he spots MC asks them to come to his room. They ask what he wants to talk about, he says he’ll tell them when he gets there. To the room as a whole he says that Diavolo wants them all at the hotel the next day. This surprises both Mammon & Beel, and Satan asks if there’s another problem at the hotel, making everyone turn and eye Levi who turns red and protests. In his room Lucifer asks if MC knows why he called them and they say nope. He asks if they really don’t know or if they’re just playing dumb. When they don’t answer he says it’s about why Diavolo called them to the hotel. He says Diavolo hasn’t told him the reason behind it and asks if MC knows, saying that for Diavolo not to tell him it has to be either something that’ll supremely piss off Lucifer or something that Diavolo finds fun and exciting that Lucifer won’t like but will have to endure. They say they don’t know anything about it. He says, “what do you think you can lie to me? Have you forgotten who the fuck I am exactly!?” When they still remain silent he drops the blank faced glare and laughs saying he can take a guess at what’s going on considering they’re not willing to share. He says considering this is them they’re probably gonna do something nice for them and he tells them they’re really sweet, they tell him not to stop and to keep stroking their ego (or they can ask for a reward). He says he may considering how things go tomorrow. He then pauses and says he’s actually in the mood to indulge them today so he’ll sing their praises just for today. (They can ask if he’s sad about saying goodbye, he says yes and then blushes and says obviously that means they’re spending the night in his room – I noped out at this point. Is it weird that Lucifer’s the only brother I can’t see MC platonically sharing a bed with?) They then tease him saying this is very unlike him. He blushes and agrees, saying that when he’s with them he doesn’t have to be the avatar of pride but that’s okay because they love all the different sides of him (I thought this was really sweet, Lucifer needs to know that there’s someone who loves him as a whole even the parts of him that are massive jerks and I love that this interaction can be read as either romantic or platonic. He smiles and says he’s looking forward for tomorrow.

The brothers are all surprised when from the hotel they are taken to the currently most popular club in the human world that has been reserved all for them, with Simeon making all the food and Luke making cakes. Luke tries his best to protect the food from Beel while Satan and Mammon say how surprise they were by Barbatos’s magic making them walk out into the club after walking into the hotel. MC asks if they like it and Lucifer says of course they do and thanks them for doing this. Solomon says he has a present for all of them too, Levi worries that he cooked for them (though he asks it with the sweetest smile cause all these demons are still hanging on to not letting Solomon know his food is toxic waste in case it hurts his feelings) and Lucifer whispers to MC that if so they might all die here. Solomon says he had offered to help cook but Simeon had insisted he had it all handled (he looks awfully disappointed when saying this). Mammon cheers on Simeon and Belphie says “…yeah I never thought I’d owe my life to Simeon but here we are” Their real present is Solomon lighting up the room with what, according to Belphie, looks like a fallen star. Asmo gushes about how beautiful it is. Beel asks if he can eat it. Levi laughs and tells him he better not. Diavolo says they should officially start the party and everyone cheers. In a side lounge area Simeon says seeing the brothers enjoying the party so much makes all the effort feel worth it, Barbatos says he’s just happy seeing Diavolo having so much fun and he thanks MC. They say they could never have done it without their help in the first place. Simeon says it was MC to got them all working together to make this happen in the first place. Levi then arrives to come drag MC towards the karaoke (which Diavolo insisted they have – poor man’s still trying to sing a duet with Lucifer I see)

Satan and Asmo complain about Levi hogging the mic and singing anime songs, he yells at them for not understanding the raw passion and energy of anime songs (which isn’t that true? Anime songs have a unique kinda passion that makes you hyped that I’ve never being able to find in other songs..). Levi tells MC to forget about them and MC asks to sing a duet. Levi says he’ll queue up a bunch of duets and Mammon yells at Levi for hogging the mic and using this as an opportunity to hit on MC. Levi laughs and says that he’s not swooping in and doing anything the way Mammon said and that MC wants to sing with him. Mammon then blushes and demands to sing the next duet with them from MC. Asmo then calls the one after that and Mammon asks Beel & Belphie what they’re doing. They’re mixing drinks. MC says there new drink (demonous with scorpion powder and something else) sounds really good (cause they’re a freak like that) Belphie says the flavours do seem to go surprisingly well together and he asks Mammon to try some. He protests saying they just want to use him as a guinea pig. Lucifer’s drawn to the commotion and says they all seem to be fun, Levi asks if he wants to sing next and he says later, he then thanks MC for planning a fun surprise for them and that they were able to create some nice final memories in the human world before heading home. MC says they’ll share more great times together and Lucifer laughs and agrees saying this won’t be the last time they’re all together and this is just one of many happy memories they’ll share in the future. When they go back to the lounge area Solomon says they could hear them all talking, singing and laughing all the way from over here despite the music, emphasizing that they could hear Levi the most. Diavolo asks them to come sit and pours them another drink and says they were all talking about them and how they helped them enjoy their time in the human realm. He thanks them from the bottom of his heart. Solomon says last time they were all together in the Devildom and this time it was in the human realm and asks where they should be together next. Luke is surprised he’s already thinking about the next time. He laughs and says it’s cause he can barely wait for the next time they are all together. MC can suggest one of the three worlds. (personally I chose the Devildom cause the brothers aren’t allowed in the Celestial Realm and as much as I am completely in love with Mammon’s human world look I miss the aesthetic of the Devildom.) Diavolo laughs and says he’s happy they’ve taken such a liking to the Devildom and that he’d love for them to come back and that the brothers will be thrilled too. From the distance and getting closer they hear Lucifer telling his brothers to quit pushing him. Mammon tells him to just hurry up and go inside. Levi says Lucifer has to be with them or they won’t be taken seriously. Lucifer groans and asks if they’re actually planning on saying “this to him”. “Of course.” Says Satan. Belphie says it’s at least worth asking. Asmo agrees saying anything’s possible if you put your mind to it. They all tumble into the lounge area and Solomon asks what brings them all here. Lucifer looking tired says that his brothers have something to ask Diavolo. Mammon tells Lucifer not to act as if he isn’t part of this and as if it hasn’t been on his mind too. Diavolo chuckles and asks what they want to ask. Beel says they’ve all been thinking about something for a while now and they want to discuss it with him. The brothers all together yell: “We want MC to join the family!” GUUUUUYYYYSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!? Not me softly sobbing at the image this makes in my head ahhhhhhh!??????? AHHHHHH!?????????? MC’s shocked and speechless. Asjvfkjffvuiefhi pls don’t give me hope like this wtf and what do they mean by join the family cause I don’t mind Lucifer more or less adopting them, and like Beel said they already seem to be a part of the family but MC brought up proposals with A LOT of the brothers so is that what they mean? Like marriage??? But they’re all asking and other than Beel & Belphie wanting to share with each other and Asmo being open to threesomes none of them want to share MC so……. Also I do not see my OM! MC getting married at all but at the same time if it was to squirrel their way into a permanent position in the family then…

Diavolo’s wide-eyed and stunned silent, and then he asks “…huh!?” Solomon bursts out laughing. Luke is red faced and tells Solomon this is no time to laugh. Solomon still laughing chokes out that he’s never seen Diavolo so stunned. Luke pauses and then asks what exactly they mean by ‘join the family’ and then he turns red and demands if they mean marrying MC. The brothers obviously haven’t really thought about what ‘join the family’ means and only now realise it can imply marriage. Asmo immediately volunteers. Mammon red faced protests to MC marrying Asmo and then stuttering says that if they’re gonna marry anyone they should marry him (he screams the last part out after struggling through the first part). Levi gets pissed saying if MC marries a scumbag like Mammon they’d have a dark, terrible future (watch me put together a 200 slide presentation refuting this) Belphie tells Asmo and Mammon to back off before they mess things up. Lucifer, looking dead tired, says it’s already a mess. Diavolo goes, “Umm…Lucifer?” and asks him to explain what’s going on. He says the others want MC around on a permanent basis so they don’t have to say goodbye ever and they put their heads together and decided on this. “Marriage!?” goes Luke. Solomon says the demons hadn’t thought how they’d make them part of the family. Lucifer tells Satan that he can look at the others like they’re a band of idiots but to leave him outta it. Solomon asks MC what they think of all this and they say they want to be part of the family too (it’s implied through out the main storyline that generally MC’s someone who’s very calm and collected and who while being incredibly blunt doesn’t express their emotions outwardly much (at the beginning of S2 Lucifer even comments on them being more expressive than before they left) but I’d like to imagine at this moment they are wet eyed and beaming because of these loveable idiots who ARE their family even if it’s not official). Diavolo smiles and says he sees. Luke has problems with humans and demons mixing and being a family (LUKE I THOUGHT WE WERE OVER THIS!?) “Yes, Luke. I know…” says Diavolo. His face then becomes serious and he’s silent and contemplative. Diavolo looks at MC and says that though they aren’t aware of it there’s still bad blood amongst the three worlds and that no matter how much they all want to be a family and stay together it’s not within his power to let that happen. He looks upset and apologizes. Lucifer is silent. He says though that his goal is to one day remove these barriers between the worlds and that he’ll do everything in his power to make that happen, and as the future demon king he promises that one day he’ll make it so that they can marry anyone in this room (I’m screaming just MC – queer as hell and with they/them pronouns waiting in the human world for marriage to get legalized only to fall in love with someone from another world and having to wait AGAIN for marriage to be legalized… I’d have lost my entire shit.) “WELL, isn’t that good for you, you apprentice poaching motherfuckers but guess what I’m a human meaning WE can get married in the meantime… CHECKMATE, BITCHES~” says Solomon. Mammon actually snaps at Solomon and calls him a “son of a –“ before he remembers the child in the room and trails off and snaps at him not to say stuff like that. Belphie asks if Solomon can even be classified as a human given his age. (Can MC even be classified as fully human given the whole Lilith situation? I mean ik Lilith was reincarnated as a human but she still kept and passed on her supernatural magic. Plus there’s a Belphie devilgram that takes places pre S1 that implies MC’s not fully human plus that whole thing about fairy hallucination angel!Lucifer not taking MC’s word for it when they said they were human… it’s very likely though everyone here’s too dumb to realise it). Satan says at this point Solomon might as well be a demon. Asmo tells him not to pretend to be a human when it’s convenient. He laughs and says that even though he can’t grow old or die he still belongs to the human race. Beel says that maybe but Solomon isn’t playing fair, Levi agrees and says Solomon’s also making him jealous. Diavolo says MC sure is popular seeing as they are all fighting over them. Lucifer says he knew this would happen and that’s why he didn’t want them to have this discussion. Luke’s shocked that MC’s got demons and the world’s greatest sorcerer wrapped around their finger, MC asks him if he sees them in a new light now. Luke says he thinks it’s impressive but it also creeps him out.

Back near the dance floor, Satan laughs and says Beel’s eating too much, Beel says Satan’s drinking too much, Satan who actually seems tipsy says he’s nowhere near his limit and challenges Beel to a competition to see who reaches their drink/food limit first, Beel agrees. Given how much beel can eat I can only assume this is the last we see of Satan RIP. Barbatos, looking uncharacteristically extremely worried, tells them to slow down cause neither of them know to stop. Levi, finishing up his song, calls for Luke who booked next but Mammon says Simeon went to put the “little guy” to sleep and asks Levi to come play cards instead. Lucifer, who’s playing with Mammon, asks if he hasn’t lost enough at this point, Mammon turns red and says this time he’s gonna win it all back. Asmo laughs and says Mammon just jinxed himself. Belphie asks why MC’s looking around the room so restlessly and they can say A.) I don’t see Diavolo anywhere B.) where’s Solomon? Either way the answer is he has no idea where Solomon went but he did see Diavolo head out earlier. He says the two of them are probably together talking. MC finds Diavolo and asks what he’s up to. He says he wanted a break and to gaze at the city lights and sober up a little since he won’t be able to see them again for awhile. He asks them to sit next to him and then laughs and says he could barely believe his ears after he heard what the brothers asked. He says he’s known the seven of them for a long time and knows how close they are and that it’s unbelievable that they’d want to include someone new to the family (MY HEART!? ALSO FOUND FAMILY TROPE!) He says it almost makes him jealous. They say that they know for a fact that he’s very important to the brothers too. He’s like “thanks for saying that but rn you’re either playing dumb or you actually are this dumb which makes me question my taste but then again I’m also in love with Lucifer so…” and he says he’s jealous of the brothers not them (Sure, Jan. We know you’re jealous of them both don’t lie). He says he feels the same as them and blushes and says he keeps thinking about how it could be if they were together forever (Sir, pls Lucifer is right there. He’s available. Pls.) He says if their relationship was on that level and if their bond was deep and permanent like those of a family he can’t even imagine how amazing that’d be (he keeps repeating ‘family’ and the brothers weren’t even thinking marriage when they asked for MC to be part of their family and Diavolo was really shocked and he now said specifically it was them asking about being ‘family’ before Luke even first mentioned marriage that made Diavolo jealous. What I’m saying is that considering Diavolo’s lonely, strict childhood the one thing he wants more than anything is a family not marriage specifically). He smiles and says they beat him to the punch and that he asks them to give him time cause he’s gonna do everything he can to mend the bridges between the three worlds for MC and for the brothers…and a little bit for himself. He gives them his word.

Out on the balcony Solomon greets them and asks if they shouldn’t be down with the others, they say they needed a break and wanted to talk to him, he wonders if the others would be pissed if they knew Solomon had MC all to himself. He says he figured he’d stay out of the way today and let MC and the demons spend time together considering he’ll have enough time to hang out with them later. He says he can’t believe they asked MC to join the family and that he didn’t see that coming. He starts laughing again about how serious they looked and how shocked Diavolo looked, and how Lucifer looked like he had a migraine (Ik we all say Lucifer’s the sadist but have we considered…) MC asks if he really thinks it’s that funny (and I’m pretty sure they’re offended on the brothers’ behalf and hurt cause that’s what they want too.) Solomon says for him it’s funny. He says it’s common of a demon to ask for a business arrangement or a pact but he’s never heard of them asking humans to join their family. He smiles and says he’s beginning to think he chose a “truly incredible” human as his apprentice. MC asks what the demons in his life are to him, he gives it serious thought and said these days he sees them as close friends. MC asks if things were different earlier and he says they were but also asks that they not get into things rn cause the story is long and tedious, MC asks if he’s just trying to avoid their question and if he’s gonna tell them the truth or not. He laughs and says nope and that though you can’t tell it by looking at him he’s a little too tipsy. He reminds them that they’re barely a sorcerer rn and that they should leave questions like that for later until they can use “magic like this” without an incantation. He uses magic to teleport the others on to the balcony (what a snake. Imagine instead of going to a crowd to escape a conversation you use your magic to bring the crowd to you to avoid a conversation AND to set a line for MC to reach before they can start poking at his past.) Asmo says he’s being wondering where the two of them went and how naughty it was to sneak off together, Levi complains about being cut halfway through a song, Beel asks MC to judge his eating competition with Satan and Satan says it’s actually a drinking competition. Barbatos looking deeply concerned asks if the two of them intend to empty the hotel’s pantry AND its wine cellar. He asks MC to stop them. Lucifer’s goading Mammon and kicking his ass in a card game and Mammon refuses to give up (HC that Lucifer taught Mammon to play cards up in the Celestial Realm as a way to get him to sit still and NOT set the drapes on fire). Belphie comments on the card game and the party continues. (Pretty sure Solomon saw the demons as pawns or tools to get what he wants/ for more power and that he was much more ruthless with making pacts with them than he is now when he pesters Lucifer (aka getting Asmo drunk while he was upset and making a pact) the question is why? And why did Michael basically sponsor this? We know that the Celestial Realm and Devildom had just called a truce when Michael took an interest in Solomon so could it be that he wanted someone to keep an eye on the demons and the best way to do that was to have a powerful human sorcerer make as many pacts with demons as possible. I mean Solomon made a pact with Asmo mostly because he was Lucifer’s brother and Michael still has a heavy interest in the brothers so it could be possible that he wanted Solomon to make a pact with one of them so that he could see what they were doing?)

LAST ONE GUYS! :) I’m okay really :)))))))) Outside the manor in the morning, Barbatos tells Diavolo it’s time and Diavolo looking really sad agrees. (RIGHT OFF THE BAT HUH!?) Even Solomon seems upset when he realizes it’s time and then that damn song starts playing, that ending song that always chokes me up and this time it doesn’t feel as sad as last season because honestly the “Till we meet again” party really helped while last season all the brothers tried to run away with MC and that shit HURT but it still makes me choked up FUCK I want them back so badly. Diavolo comes up to MC and says they have to return and that though they weren’t here for a long time it was really fun. “So, till we meet again, MC” he ends with. Barbatos thanks them for all they did to make their stay in the human world more comfortable. He says next time they meet he’ll prepare a special tea for them that he’s sure they’ll like. From here we’re going to direct quotes because I am EMOTIONAL:

Mammon says, while not meeting their eyes: …Listen, why’re you sittin’ around twiddling your thumbs, huh? I saw how hard you worked to become a sorcerer, so I know you got it in ya. (He blushes, still not meeting their eyes) Hurry up and learn summoning magic ASAP! You big dummy… (he finally looks up at them and smiles) And once you learn it, you’d better summon ME first! All right? You promise, right? (MC can either hug or kiss him….AND YOU GUYS MUST KNOW ME BY NOW SO MC just kisses him in front of all the brothers just like that????????? – he blushes and looks away again) Dammit, now I wanna take you back to the Devildom with me… (He meets their eyes one more time, face still red)

Levi says, blushing and looking aside: …You know that game we were playing? Final Devil Kingdom… (He looks up at them, still blushing) Well, I’ve decided not to make any more progress in it until I see you next. (He smiles brightly then) So we need to get together and play it again as soon as possible, okay? I mean, I’m dying to move on to the next dungeon… (He looks up at them with a sad expression then and they can either hug or kiss him and look I love Levi but I’ve already made my choice so MC hugs him – he blushes and gets a determined expression on his face) I’m going to be messaging you a lot, okay? So… don’t ignore my texts, or I’ll cry. (He smiles at them one more time)

Satan says, looking confident and meeting their eyes: …There are several cats who come by the manor for food each day. Make sure to take care of them for me. If you’re on the job, I feel like I can rest easy knowing they’ll be okay. (He frowns, blushes and looks away then) But keep in touch. Let me know how the cats are doing every day. Got it? Every day. (They hug him and he laughs and then says with a smile) Knowledge is power. The more you have, the better off you’ll be. So study hard, and learn to stand on your own two feet as a sorcerer as soon as you can.

Asmo says, looking really upset but making eye contact: No matter how I dress myself up or how cute I make my nails and makeup, if I can’t show it to the one I love the most, it won’t be fun at all. (He smiles then) So, I’ve decided to think about it this way… I have to strive to make myself more and more beautiful with each passing day! 🤍 (He smiles even more brightly) So that one day you’ll fall for me completely and then you’ll be all mine! How does that sound? (MC hugs him and he giggles, and says smiling) I’m going to put a little something extra on my hug! 🤍 (he squeezes them closer)

Beel says with a soft smile looking in at them: …It was fun getting to eat together with you every day here human world, MC. (His smile brightens) You know, when you’re with the right person, good food has a way of tasting even better. I want to be able to eat with you all the time, every single day. I want that to be normal. And I’m going to do whatever I can to make it so that someday soon, it really will be like that. (MC hugs him and he blushes and smiles and says) Make sure you eat enough, okay? Take care of yourself.

Belphie says also with a soft smile, making eye contact: I’m glad I got this chance to live here in the human world. Spending each day together with you in your world has been incredibly fun. (He looks sad and looks to the side) …Having to go to sleep every night in a house without you in it from now on is going to be really sad, and really lonely. (MC hugs them and he blushes but his expression is still sad and he doesn’t make eye contact) Take care, MC…

Lucifer’s wearing that fond smile that makes his eyes squint shut and he says: …Never did I imagine that one day, I’d find it this hard to say goodbye to you. I’ve managed to shock even myself. (He looks up at them then) Once I’m back in the Devildom, where I can’t see you anymore, this feeling is probably going to grow even worse. I hope this is every bit as difficult for you as it is for me. (MC hugs him) …Let’s make sure we see each other again sooner rather than later. (He gives that soft fond smile again)

Barbatos opens the portal. Solomon tells them all to take care. There’s a flash of bright light and the opening song starts playing. “MC!” Yells Mammon with a bright smile before he jumps in. “Toodles!” Says a beaming, waving Asmo. “Till next time!” says Levi with a small smile. “Take care of yourself!” Says a brightly smiling Belphie. “Bye…” Says Beel with a smile. “See you around.” Says Satan with a smile. “See you next time.” Says Lucifer with a nod of his head and a smile. “Goodybe, MC.” Says Diavolo with a bright smile. There’s another flash and the portal’s closed and they’re all gone. The credits play thanking all the main and side character VAs over human world backgrounds and YOU! Back in front of the manor Solomon says it suddenly got so quiet that he feels lonely. MC’s silent and doesn’t answer him. “Hey,” he says after a bit, “didn’t they officially hire you as their “babysitter” because you came here looking for a job, you know that thing you need to be able to survive independent adult life in the human world… Did they ever pay you for that?” “…SON OF A B–” At the angel’s halo Simeon tells a sad, silent Luke that the others must have gone back home by now, Luke quietly agrees. Simeon laughs and asks if that bothers Luke. Luke blushes, stutters and denies it. Luke tries to change the topic by telling Simeon to hurry up and grind some coffee cause they’re about to open. Simeon says they still have enough time and Luke says he’s gonna take out the trash and runs out back to avoid his feelings and this conversation. Simeon laughs. The door opens and Simeon turns to tell them they’re not opened yet but trails off. ??? says, “I can see that, yes…” Simeon’s eyes widen and his mouth turns down, he’s too shocked to say anything. ??? says, “Well, look at you. I could almost believe you really are a human, brother…” Simeon’s entire face goes blank and settles on a cold emotionless expression though he still doesn’t reply before he slowly smiles, “…Welcome. So glad you could stop by, Raphael.” And the chapter, the lesson and the season is over. So…SO…you know I don’t even have words really. I’m not, we really are getting new characters aren’t we. I mean I said in some of the earlier summaries that at this point with the way they were hyping up the angels in this season that it only makes sense to bring them in BUT I never 100% believed they would and now I’m just???? They really are gonna do it holy fuck GUYS!? I need S4 badly like rn immediately but given that the break between S2 and S3 was really small AND that they maybe introducing at least 2 new characters the break between S3 and S4 might be longer AND I get it y’know but still I desperately need this now. Holy shit. And Simeon’s facial expressions! How he looked surprised and upset and then how his face just shut down (something we rarely or never? See from him) and then how it smoothed out into a smile ajsdvbkdwhskcjksk Raphael’s way of speaking fit exactly with what I imagined after what Asmo, Lucifer and Belphie said about him. This kinda formal, authoritative, cold, distant way. And the tension between him and Simeon!? “BROTHER!????” Does he mean brother in the same way as the Sins do or is it more brother in arms the way I see Lucifer and Simeon being in the Celestial Realm? It felt cold compared to them. Pls give me a heavily dysfunctional, distant and cold angel family to contrast with the dysfunctional but close and loving demon family I WILL SCREAM. I’ve screamed all my angel and celestial realm theories in the previous summaries (there are a lot) so I’m not gonna go into detail about them here but I will say I’m keeping my fingers crossed for morally dubious/grey angels who believe they are completely in the right at all times and I’m deeply scared of getting at least part of S4 without the brothers as we are introduced to the angels – I mean don’t get me wrong I’d love if they took time to introduce us to the angels without the brothers’ dynamics with them being involved and to give us a chance to hear their side of the story before they have the whole reunion between everyone BUT I’ll also feel the heavy withdrawal effects of being deprived of the brothers so yeah. Overall the goodbye to the brothers felt far more uplifting than last season’s one given that they ended with the upbeat opening song and not the melancholic sounding ending song. WOW okay. I’m gonna try and get through the hard lessons and unlock the chapters I couldn’t since S2. SEE YOU NEXT SEASON! LOVE AK 🤍

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sequinsmile-x · 3 years

Text

Guardian

A mini fic, that is largely fluffy. Because lord knows we all need it.

Words: 2.5k (not as mini as I first intended)

Warnings: Minor mention of injury, some curse words because of Emily’s potty mouth

Emily hated paperwork. It was, without a doubt, the most boring part of her job. She would usually spend days like this teasing Aaron, sending him texts throughout the day and watching him through the blinds of his office as he pretended not to react, letting the tension build until they got home.

“Where is our fearless leader?” Penelope asks as she stands by Emily’s desk, a file in hand.

“He’s at a parent teacher conference.” Emily answers, smiling at her friend. “Jack was thrilled that he was in town for it.”

“You didn’t go?” Penelope asks, curiosity on her face. Their relationship was something that fascinated the rest of the team, Emily knew that. They always tried to tease details out of her, acting as if her and Aaron weren’t two intensely private people. It had only got worse since they had moved in together, a house they had bought for them both to have a fresh start in.

“We thought it would be pushing it if both of us took the afternoon out.” Emily answers, almost feeling relief when her cell phone rings. “Agent Prentiss.”

“I’m calling to speak to Emily Prentiss?”

“Speaking.”

“My name is Natalie, I’m a nurse at Saint Sebastian Hospital, you’re listed as the next of kin for Aaron Hotchner?”

Emily felt like the air had been knocked out of her. “He’s my boyfriend. Is he ok?”

“He was involved in a car accident this afternoon, he’s been brought in.”

“Oh my god.” Emily exclaims, feeling the eyes of the rest of the team on her. “His son, Jack Hotchner, would have been with him. Is he ok?”

“I’m really sorry ma’am, I’m not at liberty to discuss any other patients.”

Emily bites back a retort, a demand to know about Jack, but she knows she won’t get anywhere over the phone. “I’ll be there as soon as I can.” She hangs up the phone, tries to ignore the way her hands shake

“Everything ok there, princess?” Derek asks, as Penelope places a hand on her shoulder.

“Aaron’s been in an accident, Jack must have been with him but they wouldn’t tell me anything.” She stands, knocking Penelope’s hand off of her. “I need to go to the hospital, I need to see him.”

“I’ll drive you.” Derek says, standing himself.

“Derek, I’m fine.”

“Em, I am not letting you drive there. Ok? Hotch would never forgive me.”

Emily looks at him and nods, letting him guide her out of the bullpen.

________________

She approaches the nurses station, her body practically vibrating with different worse case scenarios over what could have happened to Aaron and Jack.

“Hi, I got a call about Aaron Hotchner.” She tries to keep her voice even and knows she has failed when Derek throws her a concerned look.

The nurse smiles reassuringly at her whilst looking at something on her computer. “He has just been sent back for some scans, but he’s doing ok. He was even arguing with my colleagues about how much he didn’t need to be here. He should be out in about 10 minutes.”

Emily breaths out a sigh of relief at that and feels Derek pat her back.

“See, Emily. Hotch is fine. Everything will be ok.”

“What about his son, Jack? He would have been in the car with him.” Emily says, her eyes searching the waiting room for the young boy.

“Are you his mother?”

Emily falters. “No. I’m not. I’m his dad’s girlfriend. I live with them.”

The nurse smiles at her again, but this time it seems forced. “I’m really sorry Ms…”

“Prentiss.” She says through slightly clenched teeth. “Agent Prentiss.”

“Agent Prentiss.” The nurse corrects herself, a slightly nervous look on her face. “I can only let a parent or guardian see him. If you aren’t his mom I’m going to have to ask you to-”

“His mom is dead.” Emily says, harsher than she intended to. She blows out a breath before she continues, attempting to calm herself down a little. “His aunt, Jessica Brooks, is out of town.” Emily says, desperately trying to keep her cool. She reaches into her bag, pulls out her wallet and slams her driving license on the table between her and the nurse, pointing out her place of residence. “I live in the same house as him. I poured him a bowl of cheerios this morning.”

“Agent Prentiss.” The nurse says, her voice remaining so patient Emily wanted to vault over the table between them and hit her. “Be that as it may, you are not his legal guardian, so I cannot let you back there to see him until his father is here.”

Emily has another idea, and reaches for the FBI credentials she has on her belt, but Derek stops her. His hand grabs her arm before she can threaten someone in a way that her boyfriend would have to reprimand her for as her boss later.

“Princess, come on.” Derek says as he gently pulls her towards the waiting area. “Let’s just sit down and chill out.”

Emily sits in one of the plastic chairs and puts her head in her hands, her elbows resting on her knees. Derek puts his hand on her back, rubs comforting circles between her shoulder blades. Time moves like syrup, and the fear of not seeing either Jack or Aaron burns through her. She eventually checks the time on her watch and blows out a breath.

“This is fucking bullshit.” She seethes. “Jack will be back there by himself. God knows where Aaron is.” She says, her voice wavering at the mention of her boyfriend. “They said he’d only be 10 minutes at least half an hour ago.”

“Jack will be fine.” Derek tries to comfort. “He’s a good kid.”

“He is 8, Derek.” She bites at her thumb, worrying the cuticle between her teeth. “This is ridiculous. I live with him. I make him breakfast every morning.”

“Pouring cereal into a bowl hardly counts as making breakfast, Em.” He says, trying to lighten her mood. She sharply turns her head to look at him, a warning look on her face that has him holding his hands up in surrender. “Ok I get it, no jokes.”

She lowers her gaze back to her lap. “Do you know it’s me that Jack wants if he’s sick, or hurt?” She asks, and briefly looks at him to see him shake his head.”

“Em?”

She looks up to see Aaron walking towards them. If Emily had been at 100%, if the fear coursing through her veins hadn’t been so sharp, she would have noticed the stiffness in his walk, how much pain he was clearly in. The relief that flooded through her was so fast she almost felt dizzy.

“Aaron.” Emily was up and in his arms before she knew what was happening, hitting his body with a force that made him grunt, knocking the air out of him as she wraps her arms around him tightly. She pulls back. “Oh god, I’m sorry.”

“Em, it’s fine. My ribs are sore, that's all.” He puts a hand on her lower back and stops her from pulling away any further, her eyebrow raised in disbelief. His voice is strained, discomfort laced through it. She lifts her hand to trace her fingers over a bandaged cut on his forehead just above his eyebrow. “My head hit the steering wheel.” He grabs her hand from his face and presses a kiss to her fingers, a promise that they will talk about it later, once they are home. “Where’s Jack?”

Emily scoffs, a look shot back at the nurse who was still at the nurses station. “They wouldn’t let me see him.” She clears her throat as she looks back at her boyfriend. “I’m not his guardian.”

Another moment of silent discussion passes between them, something else they can talk about later when they are alone. When they are safe at home and their every move wasn’t being watched by Derek, curiosity on his face at how they were around each other that they both hadn’t missed.

“He was ok when we came in.” He assures her, seeing how concerned she looked. “They were going to look at his arm, it looked broken.”

Emily nods, some of the concern seeping away. Aaron links his fingers through hers and gives Derek a nod as they walk past him, a silent thank you for looking after Emily when he couldn’t. Aaron approaches the nurses station and clears his throat, getting the attention of the same nurse who Emily had spoken to earlier.

“I’d like to see my son, Jack Hotchner.”

They are quickly taken to Jack who looks just as relieved to see them as they do to see him, and they sit with him as he gets an arm cast put on. Aaron sits in a chair, failing to cover the wince that escapes him as he lowers himself into it. Emily sits next to Jack on the bed, wrapping an arm around him and pressing a kiss to the top of his head as he tries to be brave, pretending he hadn’t been crying whilst waiting for them to come get him.

Jack burrows into Emily’s side as the doctors gently wrap his arm, and she can’t help herself when she throws the same nurse who refused her access to Jack a look when she walks by the bay they are in.

________________

Emily convinces Aaron to go grab a shower as she tucks Jack in for the night, his arm in it’s bright green cast resting on a pillow. It doesn’t take him long to fall asleep, the stress of the day taking all of the endless energy he usually had. Emily sneaks out of the room, gently pulling the door closed behind her as she goes.

She sighs as she walks the short distance to the master bedroom, the shower still running in the ensuite. Emily sits on the end of the bed and puts her head in her hands, tries to force back the emotion that was threatening to overwhelm her, the knowledge of what she could have lost today settling over her now they were home. Emily hears the shower switch off and she blows out a breath, trying to centre herself.

Emily can’t stop the gasp that escapes when he walks out, just with a pair of sweatpants on, and she sees the extent of the damage for the first time. The bruise across his chest caused by the seat belt looked painful, his ribs almost black, clearly fractured.

“Aaron.” She says softly, her hand reaching out but stopping just shy of actually touching him.

“It’s ok, Em.” He grabs the hand she's got hovering near him and intertwines their fingers, squeezes her hand in a way she’s sure is meant to be reassuring.

“Ok?” She asks, scoffing at him. “You clearly have broken ribs, Aaron.” She shakes her head at him, interrupts him when he tries to placate her again. “Nothing about today was ok.”

Aaron cups her face in both hands, wiping away a tear that she wasn’t aware had fallen until his thumb stroked her cheek.

“Emily, Jack and I are both fine.” He leans forward and kisses her forehead, and she brings her hands to his wrists, stroking the delicate skin there. “We’re a little banged up, but nothing that won’t get better.”

She nods against him. “I...I know I’m not his mother.” She pulls away to smile at him, and she bites her lip in an attempt to stop it from shaking. “But not being able to see Jack today really sucked. I live with him, I love him, Aaron. I should be able to see him when he’s hurt.”

“Em-”

“If you’d been hurt worse, or killed.” Emily feels more tears fall at that, shakes her head at herself. “I wouldn’t have been able to go to him.”

“Emily.” He strokes her cheek again, a smile on his face that always calmed her. “I agree with you.”

She furrows her brow, having clearly expected more of a pushback. “What?”

“We should make you his legal guardian. We probably should have done it when we got the house.”

“Really?” I don’t want you to think I’m trying to take Haley’s place.”

“Sweetheart, you have never done that. You love my son, and he loves you. It makes me love you more. We’ll get it sorted.”

“I love you.” She says, leaning forward to kiss him, keeping it brief and laughing when she pulls away from him when he tries to kiss her again. “Don’t get any ideas, Agent Hotchner. Those ribs of yours have put you out of action for quite some time.” She laughs at him as she pulls herself out of his embrace. “I’m going to get changed for bed.”

Emily grabs some pyjamas and busies herself in the ensuite, ignoring his shirt in the hamper that had his blood on it. She goes about her evening routine, takes off her makeup and brushes her teeth, piling her hair on top of her head in a messy bun. She sighs as she looks at herself in the mirror, taking in just how tired she looked. All she wanted to do was get in bed with her boyfriend, make sure he took a painkiller he’d probably attempt to say he didn’t need, and fall asleep.

When she walks in and finds him sitting on the edge of his side of the bed, still only in his sweatpants, with a small velvet box in his hands it stops her in her tracks.

“Aaron.”

“I had a whole plan.” He says, looking up at her. He stays sat on the bed, and she knows it’s partially because he’d be in too much pain to stand up. “It seems silly now.”

“It’s not silly.” Emily says, her throat feeling like it was constricting, the emotion rising in her chest. She stands in front of him, catches the hand not holding the ring box in hers. She links their fingers.

“I’d get down on one knee but I don’t think I’d ever get back up.” Aaron jokes, and it makes her choke out a laugh that becomes a sob on its way out.

“That’s ok.” Emily sits next to him on the bed.

He opens the box and she gasps when she sees the ring. Simple, platinum band with a good sized single diamond. Exactly what she would have picked herself.

“Emily, marry me.”

She laughs. “I think it’s meant to be a question, honey.”

Aaron smiles at her, his dimples out on display. “Will you marry me?”

“Of course I will.” She replies, cupping his cheek in her hand. “Yes.”

He kisses her, and she responds, pushing herself closer to him, her hand travelling to the back of his head. They both get lost in it for a moment until he groans in pain, making her pull back from him.

“I didn’t think this all the way through.” He says, smiling at her as he pulls the ring out of the box and slips it onto her finger. “My plans involved celebrating with a lot of sex.”

Emily laughs and rests her forehead against his. “All in good time my love.”

#hotchniss #hotchniss fanfic #hotchniss mini fic #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #fluff #minor aaron hotchner whump #its just fluff guys #lots of fluff #CM fan fic #Criminal Minds fluff

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vickyvicarious · 3 years

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Just as I was about to go to sleep last night, I got a brain flash that went basically "something something flashback episode thiefsome themes???" so now in the light of day let's re-examine. This still isn't anything too polished, but... I think there's some interesting stuff to be found here.

Putting it under a tag so it doesn't clog up peoples' dashes too much, but the gist is that their roles actually represent their relationships/desires at each respective point in canon quite well, and it's giving me some thoughts about what a possible flashback with Hardison/Eliot would look like.

In the van Gogh Job, we get flashback Parker/Hardison. Obviously it wasn't them and the names are different and all but I'm just gonna call them f!Hardison and f!Parker because it's easier.

f!Hardison is brave, clever, determined, and deeply in love

f!Parker is loyal, comfortable, just as deeply in love, but terrified

Their flashback story is a cautionary tale as much as it is a romance. F!Hardison shares so many traits with Hardison himself, and f!Parker is a clear representation of current Parker. They make no bones about it, the parallels are extremely obvious and are even what makes the guy start telling Parker his story in the first place. Parker loves Hardison but she has found a place to belong in the team (flashback town/roller rink) and is afraid of what will happen if she disturbs that status quo by getting into a relationship with him. She's too scared of losing him (flashback to her racist dad/his buddies killing or hurting him, modern to the possibility of death mostly) to take the step to actually be with him, even though they both know she wants to. I love that there isn't any hint of her doubting his feelings or that he will remain devoted in either flashback or modern; the focus is entirely on her own fears for him and how she would handle that, not ever of him in any way.

Regardless of the timeframe, it's clear that (f!)Hardison loves her and will respect what she is willing to give him, even if that means leaving her. In the flashback, f!Parker still loves him and saves his painting in his honor for the rest of her life, remaining loyal to him despite never seeing him again. None of the emotion is in question at all, and it's clear that if she is willing to give it, her faith in him will be completely justified.

The episode basically just acts out Parker's fears (puppet-style?) and demonstrates to her that even though she would be fine if she doesn't take the leap - she'll be so much happier if she does. There's no guarantee of a happy ending, but Hardison is still himself and that means that before that ending comes at the very least, she will be happy. (Much like Sophie's beautiful speech to her.) Parker was already beginning to ease into a relationship with him, and this episode doesn't exactly drive her to jump in headfirst, but it's clear when we watch her reaction to the story what she will choose. She's going to build up her courage, but she's going to take the risk.

Now, given how transparent that episode is on their pairing, I kind of wondered what would happen if I look at the one that pairs Parker/Eliot's flashback selves: the D.B. Cooper Job.

f!Parker is understanding, supportive, loyal, and gives him a place to belong

f!Eliot starts out doing something bad for the sake of someone he loves, is drawn to her, and later feels wracked by guilt and seeks redemption by helping others

The focus in this one obviously isn't on the romance. It isn't even on either of these characters, so much as it is on Nate and his flashback self. But the parallels between modern and f!Eliot are still pretty apparent, if a bit watered down in that f!Eliot has no intentions to hurt anyone and in fact takes pains not to do so.

But as far as pairings go, I think what they do between these two is pretty interesting. Their flashback characters are drawn to one another, feel a kind of understanding and recognition that they can't quite explain. It's why f!Parker stops him before he jumps and never gives him up, it's why f!Eliot trusts her in the first place and why he shows up at her door after it is all over. I think this is a really nice parallel to the way Eliot and Parker understand one another and have this connection that is different from the rest of the team.

The other thing I like a lot is that in this episode, f!Parker is the steady support. She represents the home f!Eliot longs to have, even if she isn't the one who eventually offers him the chance to help others and make his own redemptive efforts. In fact, him working with f!Nate starts out for selfish reasons and only later evolves into a place where he feels he belongs. That's another obvious parallel to the Eliot we know, but the Parker in this episode is a little less immediately recognizable. Sure, she's an incredibly loyal person and will obviously not care overmuch about crime or whatever but mostly it's harder to see her as much in that role.

But I think she serves much the same role here as f!Hardison in the other episode. Though modern Eliot isn't hearing this story and making any resolutions based on it, the casting still represents their relationship. Parker is growing steadily into the position of leader/mastermind, and at this point she and Hardison are openly together. She is someone who understands Eliot on a very deep level, and she is coming to be the person who is his rock. While I'm not discounting Hardison's importance at all, Parker more closely fits the role of the person who encouraged him to take the job in this flashback. She's the one who, only three episodes later in Rundown, verbalizes a promise to change together. She (and also Hardison) represent the home Eliot craves to have, the belonging and support necessary for him to grow and to do good in the world. What's more, f!Parker is accurate in representing her side of things as someone who wants that for him. She wants to invite him in, wants to support him even if it's from a bit more of a distance at first (pre-relationship) but would absolutely welcome him inside as soon as he shows up at her door (once he's ready, she will bring him into the thiefsome).

And Rundown shows us that in action, again only three episodes later. Not in the sense of canon thiefsome, but Parker and Hardison are absolutely supporting Eliot leaving his darker past behind, changing with them for the better - and not just getting away with his own hands clean, but doing the extra work to help others (going after the guy who tried to hire him instead of just leaving town; again when they realize how serious the situation is but stay to fix it). The episode even ends with Eliot literally throwing away the crutch that would allow him to walk on his own, and pull them both in to support him instead. He's in the middle, he's deciding to join them even if he could get by alone, it's all representative for them welcoming him into the relationship too. (I headcanon something went down between them here but it isn't all cleared up relationship-wise until the Toy Job, but either way the themes are there!)

So with this in mind... The flashback with Hardison/Parker focused on Parker and her fears/decision to enter into a relationship with Hardison. Similarly, the flashback with Eliot/Parker focuses more on him and his desire to join the relationship. For both of them, the episode represents a shift in their relationship with one another, something not entirely unknown before, but a step that is challenging for them personally. Still, this step leads to greater happiness and growth.

All that in mind... what would a Hardison/Eliot episode look like, if we got it in Redemption? I'm getting into slight spoiler territory here, so leave now if you haven't seen the first few episodes.

Okay, so since we've had more focus on Parker, and on Eliot, this episode would focus most on Hardison. It makes sense as well for his role in the new series, because while Parker and Eliot are a little more stable, Hardison is the one entering a challenging new period of his life that is difficult but helping him grow.

I don't have any kind of full plot figured out, but here are some things I think we might see:

f!Eliot is supportive, confident, and believes deeply in him

f!Hardison is bold, struggles with self-doubt, and upends his own life in order to change the world for the better

I think Eliot's role in this flashback would be smaller, but he'd love f!Hardison deeply and the focus would not be on their relationship developing, but on the challenges it would face as f!Hardison embarks on... whatever it is. It has to be something f!Eliot knows he cannot do, and maybe even something that might mean the end of their relationship (though much like the van gogh job, the love between them is never in question).

I've seen people mentioning a Stonewall flashback episode for these two before, and that's possible. But another thing we could see is f!Hardison working against racist laws or something. Whatever the case, he needs to be doing something that benefits many, many other people, and it needs to put him at personal risk. I'm not entirely sure on what would be holding Eliot back from helping in the same way - it may just be as simple as f!Hardison gives amazing speeches and inspires so many people, while f!Eliot just doesn't have that skill. Maybe he is sick. Maybe, their relationship does end up attracting violence, and he gets hurt (doesn't even have to be their romantic relationship, if we're going a race angle and setting this episode further back, it could just be an open friendship with their romance kept secret. the themes would still be there). Whatever the case, f!Hardison has to leave Eliot behind.

And yeah, this has already happened in canon. We're already here. But if we wanted this episode to happen, I think it would be possible for the themes to still be relevant and the challenge to still be there for Hardison's character, if something brings him back to the team. If something goes down and he isn't there, and it terrifies him that he wasn't there, and he has trouble leaving again even though his work isn't done. Or if he organizes something on his end of the world that goes horribly wrong somehow. Sometimes it's not the first step that's hardest, it's keeping on even after the first big challenge. No road is free of bumps, after all, so Hardison might well think he's fine at first but start having doubts even after things have been going well for a while.

That is where you can bring this episode into play. That's where you start - f!Hardison is already getting involved in activism of some kind, but his own fame brings about negative consequences or something unrelated happens, and it scares him and makes him consider giving his work up. The episode can be bittersweet, with them never reuniting, or it can have a happier ending where he returns and f!Eliot is still waiting for him. But it's important for Eliot to represent a home that Hardison is already comfortable in, and one he has to leave in order to help others (however temporary the leaving is). And we need to see him away from the team, thriving and growing and improving so many peoples' lives in ways that never would have happened without him - both in the flashback, and in the modern part of the episode. In fact, Hardison doesn't even need to actually be physically with the team at all in the modern part of the episode. It can be more like the Broken Wing job, where we get hints at what they are doing but the focus is entirely on him and his struggle.

Of course, I have no idea how this would tie in to a modern heist. But maybe the format could be changed up, if we focus more on Hardison outside of the team. I'm sure there's some way this could be worked. And I think it would do really well in completing the trio of thiefsome episodes, and giving equal emphasis on all three of them in each one.

#leverage #leverage meta #leverage redemption #thiefsome #leverage ot3 #leverage spoilers #my meta #do i ever expect to get this hardison/eliot flashback episode? no. but i can still dream #i have to go to dinner so i don't have time to read this over for spelling errors or messups of any kind really. sorry for any of those!

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