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#some of y'all are so vicious to him damn
mydearzero · 2 years
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𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕾𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖈𝖍 𝖋𝖔𝖗 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝕬𝖇𝖔𝖑𝖊𝖙𝖍 | 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤!𝐄.𝐌. 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
MASTERLIST
Summary: Eddie's new campaign is brutal. But what happens when you get sucked into the game of D&D, Jumanji style, and encounter Eddie under the mind-control of a vicious beast?
Warnings: dark!Eddie (noncon, dubcon, mind-control, telepathy, degradation, humiliation, blood, dacryphilia) smut (penetrative sex (f rec), oral (f and m receiving) creampie, overstimulation, forced orgasm, rough sex, outdoor sex) angst, predator/prey dynamics.
THIS WORK IS 18+ MINORS DO NOT READ OR INTERACT
This also won't make a whole lotta sense D&D wise, but I tried lol. I don't know what else to say about this one y'all.
4.2K words
beta read by @mypoisonedvine
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Eddie's latest campaign was taking over your life. He had been preparing it for weeks beforehand, ensuring it would be the longest and most gruelling campaign to date. The research had been brutal. Eddie wanted your help but didn't want to let you in on too many details. 
When the time finally came to play, it was nearing the end of summer. Mr Clarke had indulged and given one (1) universal key to the school to the Hellfire Club. How he'd trusted the bunch of you with it was beyond your comprehension. Damn Henderson and his inability to be disliked. 
So here you were, in the theatre room, blocking the windows with trash bags and tape to obstruct any light. The new campaign had something to do with an amphibian creature, which was already more info than Eddie had been willing to divulge. 
The rest of Hellfire would arrive shortly, so you and Eddie rushed to finish the last details. You noticed a couple of books stacked by Eddie's chair, mainly ones to help him with the campaign. Scribbled on the top of his notes was the name of the campaign. 
"The Search for the Aboleth" 
That was all the club had been allowed to know about the campaign. They knew of Aboleths, but with Eddie as Dungeon Master, you could never be sure how the creature would be implemented. Whether the search would be one for a friend or a foe. You'd have to play his game and hope you survive. 
When the others finally arrived, they crowded around the table, observing what they could of what they would be up against. Eddie sat on his throne, a proud smirk dancing on his lips as he watched the club members. 
The excited chatter died down as Eddie's demeanour changed. It was game time. Silence overtook the room as everybody took their place around the table, glancing at Eddie in suspense. 
He started telling the tale of the Aboleth, a wicked creature of the sea with the ability to breathe on land and covered in thick, grey mucus. Similar to Mind Flayers in ability but older, more fearsome and highly intelligent. With their racial memory, they inherited the memories of all their ancestors. 
Long story short, this was not a friend you were to search for. It was a vile enemy, one with psionic abilities and capable of some critical damage. 
The Aboleth you were looking for had enslaved a party member, making him their loyal servant. Your objective was to find the Aboleth, slay it and free your party member. 
Hours were spent that evening debating, rolling dice and screaming in despair when member after member perished from their injuries. Your gaze fell upon Lucas, the only remaining member besides Gareth, still fighting by your side. His look was one of sorrow. There was no coming back from this. 
Eddie cut the campaign short, then. It was getting late, and Hawkins was under a permanent curfew. Time to go home and sleep off the post-d&d jitters before letting them fall back into place the following afternoon. 
The boys tailed out of the classroom, leaving you with Eddie to clean up and rearrange the table. Everything to be able to continue where you'd left off. You heard Eddie shuffle after you'd cleaned up the figurines and dice, catching his gaze as he blew out the last candle, leaving you in total darkness. 
You heard a dark chuckle from the abyss. It sounded like Eddie. It had to be him, right? Who else could be here? A deep chill settled in your bones as you walked backwards, stepping away from the table. 
You tripped over seemingly nothing, perhaps your own feet, sending you toppling. You expected to hit the floor, but the direction of gravity appeared to change. Suddenly, you were falling forward. Your hands shot out to catch yourself, but you were surprised when your back eventually hit the floor, knocking all air out of your lungs. 
Head spinning with disorientation, Eddie seemed to finally have turned on the lights in the classroom. Your chest rose rapidly, trying to catch your breath as your eyes adjusted to the brightness. Your brows furrowed, eyes narrowed as you took in your surroundings, still on the floor. 
This wasn't a classroom. 
Where you were, exactly, you couldn't say. It was too dark yet too bright at the same time. It was then you felt a pain shoot from your leg up to your thigh. Looking down, you noticed the surface you'd fallen on. A combination of rocks, dirt, sticks and other things you'd find in nature. The ground was moist. One particularly large, sharp rock had lodged its way into your calf, leaving a gnarly wound, oozing blood. That would explain the pain. 
"Wanna roll on your luck, babe? Maybe it'll heal, maybe it won't." Your head whipped around. Eddie? 
He was holding a vial containing red, glistening liquid. A Potion of Healing? When had he managed to make such a convincing prop? He tossed you a D20, eyebrows raised in expectation. Was he seriously expecting you to roll for your possibility of taking the potion when you were bleeding? 
You grabbed it and glanced at Eddie before rolling it into the dirt. Eddie gazed at the number facing up, tutting at the outcome. "Seems like it's just out of reach. How unfortunate."
You knew he must've been joking. The potion was probably cherry-flavoured Kool-Aid. So why were you filled with feelings of anguish at your inadequate roll? Why was he still not helping you stop the bleeding, stop the pain? 
Another dark chuckle, the same as you'd heard before. You observed Eddie, helpless as he laughed. He met your eyes, an unsettling feeling developing in your gut. His eyes were clouded, distant. You attempted to get a read of his feelings, maybe his thoughts. But nothing. He was a shell. 
You tried to pull yourself from the ground, groaning as you felt the sting of the rock lodged in your skin. You pulled it out with a pained yelp and tossed it aside, scanning the wound. It wasn't too bad. The blood made it look worse than it really was. Though that was a comforting thought, the uneasy feeling in your stomach remained. 
You pushed yourself onto your feet, holding onto Eddie's bicep as you steadied yourself. Another sharp pain shot up your spine, but you had no choice but to ignore it. You had to figure out where you were, how you got here and what the hell was going on with Eddie. 
You took in your surroundings, baffled by the fact that it had been a theatre classroom a few minutes ago. No chairs, tables or even windows were in sight. You weren't even inside a building. You craned your neck to gander at the sky, the moon closer to Earth than you'd ever seen. If this even was Earth. The atmosphere looked like one of the drawings from Eddie's books. 
Something was definitely very wrong. 
Your hand was still resting on Eddie's arm, but he was cold to the touch. He must've been here for some time, longer than you, seeing as you were still warm. He inhaled deeply through his nose, closing his eyes before turning to you. "Wanna go for a swim?" 
You looked confused at the question. Swim? At a time like this? He grabbed your shoulders and turned you to the giant lake behind you. A monstrous beast was writhing among the smaller fish. Its eel-like stature was an eerie sea-green colour. Three red eyes on the top of its head were watching your every move. You turned slowly to look at Eddie, not daring to make any sudden movement. 
"The Aboleth... Isn't it beautiful?" 
A red sheen covered Eddie's eyes— you knew he was gone. You ripped yourself free from his grip and ran as fast as your legs would carry you. Your bleeding calf was screaming at you to stop, but the sound didn't overpower Eddie's taunting laughs as he followed you unhurriedly. 
It was clear now the party member enslaved by the Aboleth was him. You didn't know where you were going, but you knew you had to get away from the creature, get away from Eddie. You hid behind what looked like a tree in an attempt to catch your breath. The mysterious noises emerging from your surroundings didn't take away from the suspense, adding a soundtrack of howling critters and winds to your despair. 
Your mind wandered to the campaign. Was this some sick joke? An immersive experience Eddie had prepared? You wanted out. Your mind flashed back to when Eddie had introduced the creature. 
"Aboleths are fish-like amphibians of immense size. They are both extremely cruel and highly intelligent. They have the ability to change creatures' consciousness to that of a mindless servant. This allows Aboleths to keep slaves, known as Aboleth Servitors, which they dominated and kept captive through their mind."
The heaving of your chest diminished along with the fast pace of your heartbeat. You listened for Eddie's footsteps, but it was in vain. You wouldn't have been able to hear them over the sound of the forest. 
You examined your leg but were stumped to see the wound had slowly closed in on itself, only the remnants of blood left behind. It no longer hurt. Relief washed over you. Maybe you'd be able to do this. Perhaps, you'd be able to run. 
An icy breeze blew through your hair, a quiet gasp escaping you. You slammed your hand over your mouth to cover the sound, but the hand running through your hair and down your neck told you enough. He'd found you. 
He took a strand between his fingers and brought it up to his nose, inhaling deeply. Your eyes were squeezed shut, wishing for this nightmare to end. To wake up, whether it be in the classroom or your bed. For Eddie to be the sweet, caring person you knew he was. Not this... this carcass possessed by a monster. 
"That healing ability of yours won't save you, sweetheart." He whispered in your ear. Goosebumps raised at his words, covering your body as a chill went down your spine. You took in his words and looked back down at your leg. 
Your D&D character had healing abilities. The Aboleth was part of Eddie's campaign. Was this The Search for the Aboleth? Because if so, you'd found it, alright. You needed real Eddie's guidance on what to do. Give you your options. Let you roll to see the damage you'd do. Be your Dungeon Master. If this genuinely was Eddie's campaign, there had to be a chance to win. 
"I can hear the cogs turning in your head, sweetheart. There's no use." It was Eddie's voice, but it wasn't his words. This wasn't Eddie. You had to remind yourself that it was the Aboleth. 
You tried thinking through your options. Which other powers did your D&D character have? If your healing ability was somehow working, others must too, right? 
You searched for eye contact with Eddie. Maybe if you could communicate with the part of him that was still in there, you'd be able to free him of the Aboleth's control. You shouted his name as loud as you could without the use of your vocal cords. His smile turned sinister, mocking. A voice echoed in your head. 
'If a creature communicates telepathically with the Aboleth, the Aboleth learns the creature's greatest desires.'  It was the memory of real Eddie describing the Aboleth's abilities. He had explained it earlier when Mike had tried the same thing on one of the other Aboleth servitors. You should've known not to try. 
A searing, white pain shot through your head as Eddie placed his palms to your temples. He was digging through every crevice of your brain, using the Aboleth's abilities to explore everything you desired most in life. His eyebrows raised in surprise, a disbelieving scoff leaving his lips. 
"It seems the thing you desire most... is me."
His hand covered your mouth before the pleading gasp wanting to escape could do so. His other hand found your waist, holding you as you clawed at his arm. You struggled to breathe as he pulled you to a clearing. He finally let up as he pushed you to the ground harshly. 
"Eddie... Please..." You begged as he towered over you. He had to be in there somewhere. You weren't sure what his next move was, but every bone in your body knew it couldn't be anything good. 
He bent down and grabbed your ankles, tugging you to him. The skin on your arms scraped as he dragged you over the stone ground. A metallic scent hit your nose. Undoubtedly, you were bleeding again. 
"We're just giving you a taste of what you want. It can all be yours if you come willingly." Eddie mumbled as he got on your level, rubbing up your thigh. You tried to scoot back, away from his touch, but the grip on your ankle was relentless. 
"Unwillingly, it seems. It's not like you have a choice." He grumbled as he ripped your bottoms in one go. 
"Eddie, stop!" You shrieked and struggled and tugged to pull your ankle from his grasp. He ignored your pleas with a menacing laugh as he continued undressing you. You tried to cover yourself to the best of your ability, but it was useless. Whatever had taken over Eddie's body had given him the strength of a dozen men. 
"You're all the same, you humans." Eddie moaned as he palmed himself through the fabric of his jeans. "Getting worked up over nothing, desiring nothing but other humans. This one is just like you. Desiring you. Wanting you most out of anything any world has to offer. Pathetic, breeding folk." 
He grabbed your breast hungrily, bending down to take your nipple in his mouth. He took it between his teeth, tugging at it painfully. He slapped your thigh— hard. A warning to not make any more noise. You hadn't been aware you'd been pleading with him to stop continuously. That was going to leave a bruise. Or it wouldn't, depending on whether you'd dreamt up the healing abilities. 
"Even this body. It can't resist. It really has a mind of its own when presented with an object of its desire. Ridiculous."
He took his time with your tits and nipples, sucking, pinching, kneading, anything that pleased him. It wasn't like you had the strength to stop him. Subdued cries repeatedly left your mouth, but your struggle diminished as your body betrayed you. 
Eddie grabbed your ankles and pulled them apart, spreading you open for him to see you on display. A tear rolled over your temple. At this point, it wasn’t out of pain or desperation. It was out of embarrassment. Embarrassment at the heat in your abdomen, the glistening of your cunt. Eddie saw it. You knew he did. 
He sought eye contact, the glint in his eyes knowing. It was almost like regular Eddie when he knew something you didn't. Almost. 
"You're such a disgusting whore. Already fucking wet?" You felt defeated. You wanted to fight, but the powers granted to Eddie saw right through you. They saw what you liked. What would get you soaked in seconds— even when you least wanted it. 
Both his hands ran up your thighs as he sat on his knees. His thumbs ran over your folds, spreading them so he could get a proper view of your pussy. You pleaded once more. He could still stop. He could still salvage this. He didn't let up, plunging the tip of his thumb inside, feeling the rim of your entrance, tugging at it and stretching it painfully. 
A quiet sob left you when you knew this was really happening. You'd imagined sleeping with Eddie. Sucking him off, taking his fingers, bouncing on his cock. You'd imagined it all. But this? This had never been amongst the possibilities your mind had fabricated. 
Eddie bent down, keeping his hands on your knees as he inhaled the scent of your arousal. "Haven't smelled anything that delicious in decades, maybe even centuries." He licked between your fold gingerly, groaning as he did so. You felt the vibrations of his voice reverberate against your clit. You clenched your lips shut along with your eyes, not wanting to give in to the sensation. 
His mouth closed around your clit, sucking and tonguing at it, gauging your reaction. Your hand slapped over your mouth. You refused to enjoy this. This wasn't Eddie. It might look and sound like Eddie, but it wasn't him. 
"Oh, but it is me. I've just been... enlightened."
Eddie's eyes closed in bliss as his tongue dipped inside. His thumb circled your clit rapidly. Whines built up inside your chest, but you didn't dare let them out. This shouldn't feel good. Your fist clenched as he watched you like a hawk, relentlessly pushing you closer and closer to the edge. 
"Please, Eddie!" You yelled out as the hand covering your mouth slapped the floor, searching for any leverage. The worst part was that you weren't sure what you were pleading for. You wanted him to stop. But you didn't, couldn't have him stop now. 
"Come for me. Come on my tongue like the desperate bitch you are." The pressure on your clit and in your abdomen increased. You tried to hold it. You couldn't give this monster the satisfaction. Eddie smirked as he noticed your struggle but knew you wouldn't be able to resist much longer. 
When his mouth diverted its attention back to your clit, three fingers slipped inside roughly, curling them just right. You cried out as you clenched your teeth. You had to hold it. You had to. 
But you couldn't. 
The repeated come-hither motion combined with the attention to your clit sent you over the edge with a loud scream. You saw white as your chest heaved, but your breaths were short-lived when you were picked up by your shoulders and pushed down on your knees punitively. You heard Eddie unbuckle his belt, taking off his jeans but leaving his shirt. 
His hand came up to your chin, pushing your cheeks with his fingers. Your mouth opened of its own volition, giving him exactly what he wanted. "If I feel any teeth, you're dead. Got it?" He snarled viciously. You nodded as a tear fell down your face. You hadn't even noticed you'd begun crying. 
You felt vile as you sat with your knees in the dirt, proof of your orgasm dripping down your thighs. You heard Eddie gurgle before bringing your face close, spitting in your mouth. He took his cock in hand and brushed it over your lips, gathering the spit that hadn't made it inside before pushing past your lips. 
He didn't give you room to breathe, holding the back of your head as he pushed until the tip hit your throat. His other hand found yours, bringing it up to cup his balls. "Leave it there, play with them." He grunted as he increased speed. He smirked when he felt you gag, pushing just that tiny bit harder to feel it again. 
"You're even prettier when you cry for me. With those big, fat cry-baby tears rolling down those adorable cheeks?" He laughed as he wiped them away. Your eyes were almost as red as Eddie's were under the control of the Aboleth. 
You felt more tears escape your eyes when you realized that despite all this, gagging and being unable to breathe around his dick, a low simmer of heat once again developed in your nethers. Your free hand itched to relieve the tension, but you placed it on his thigh instead, steadying yourself against his quick thrusts. 
Eddie's hips stuttered before they stilled, releasing inside your mouth with a loud moan. He remained still for a second before pulling out, tapping your cheek with the palm of his hand. "C'mon, open up. Show me."
Your face was one of misery as you slowly opened your mouth, letting him observe the mess he'd made. "Good girl... See? Isn't this exactly where you're supposed to be? What you're supposed to do? On your knees, serving your master?" The smile on his face was filled with pride and insult. 
He pushed your shoulder, sending you collapsing back to the floor. You cried as your head hit the cold stone. You felt dizzy as Eddie towered over you, pushing your legs open and positioning himself between them. "Please, Eddie. No more. Please."
Your begs went unanswered as Eddie placed his hands on your knees, lining himself up before brutally pushing inside. The stretch was painful, but you'd already come once. The slick from your previous orgasm was enough lubrication for him to slide in and out at a gruelling pace smoothly. Your pleas slowly diminished into small whines and moans, no longer being capable of holding them back. 
Eddie bent down as he continued thrusting, licking a stripe up your neck before nibbling on your earlobe. "I know you're loving this. You don't want to, but you can't help it. I know you want me to destroy you. Whether it be this version or the one you're comparing me to. As long as I look like Eddie Munson, you're gonna come for me. Cream all over my cock when I pump you full of my cum."
His voice was a mere whisper, but you knew he was right. As long as it was Eddie, in any shape or form, you'd come undone. His hair tickled your neck as he hung above you. He changed the angle of his hips abruptly, along with his pace. You moaned loudly at the unexpected abuse of your most sensitive spot. 
"See?" He groaned as he placed a kiss on your neck. Now that the dam of your moans had broken, you couldn't suppress them flowing out. The vulgar sound of his balls slapping against you combined with your broken moans echoed through the clearing. 
His hand left your knee to stroke your clit with ruthless pressure and pace. Mixed with his cock hitting the right spot over and over and Eddie sucking on your neck, it was too much. Your senses were overwhelmed. Your head was still spinning from hitting the floor, but now it was also reeling with pleasure. 
You didn't have time to feel disoriented as Eddie ravished your cunt. The sharp jabs of his hips pulled everything from you, moans, whines, pleas and cries. Your hands made their way to Eddie's back, scratching vigorously as a means to ground yourself as you neared your second orgasm. Your hips started meeting his pace, desperate for release, hopeless for this to be over.  
You panicked as you felt him speed up, seeking his release. You were so close, but he couldn't come inside. You'd give everything to come, but not if it meant being filled up in return. Tears welled and spilt at the realization, hips unable to stop. Your mind fought your body as Eddie continued drilling into you. 
He bit your shoulder when you felt he was close. You were right there with him. "Scream for me. Scream my name." Eddie groaned in your ear as he came, spilling inside you, filling you up. You felt so full. He continued thrusting, squelching sounds coming from your cunt as you squeezed around him. 
Your whines became high-pitched as your eyes squeezed shut, coming on his cock as he laughed manically. A scream of his name escaped your mouth as everything went dark. 
"Eddie!" 
Silence overtook you as you suddenly felt heavy. You felt around you as you opened your eyes. You were surrounded by darkness. Your fingers touched the hardwood floor. 
Lights flickered above you as Eddie looked at you questioningly from the other side of the classroom. You looked down on yourself. You were fully dressed, appearing to have tripped over a bag. 
"You okay?" He questioned with a concerned expression. You nodded wildly, though cautious. Had you just hit your head? Had Eddie been here all along? How long had you been gone? Out? 
Eddie noticed your perplexed face and offered his hand to help you up. You took it and rose to your feet. Eddie frowned as he grabbed your elbow to examine your arm. He took your other arm, both had been scraped up pretty badly. 
"How'd this happen?" He asked. It couldn't have happened due to a simple fall on a hardwood floor, could it? You shrugged as your knees weakened. Was this still all in your head? Was this still possessed Eddie? He tutted as he released you from his grip. He turned to the table and grabbed the D20. 
"Wanna roll on your luck, babe?"
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legacyshenanigans · 17 days
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Prisoner MC x Marvolo 🐍💚
An AU where she's part of a rival gang
(if y'all want more of this kinda shit, I'm happy to oblige and make it separate little AU thing 😏)
MC: *wakes up behind bars in a dank dungeon cell, with a chain around her neck, which is bolted to the wall behind her*
Marvolo: Ah, you're awake *smirks as he approaches the bars, looking down at her*
MC: *frowns*
Marvolo: Awwwww *chuckles* What's that vicious little frown for? *narrows eyes* Smile for me *sinful grin*
MC: Go to hell.
Marvolo: Already there, sweetheart *chuckles before he speaks sarcastically* it PAINED me having to put the likes of you behind bars....You look good like this though...All pathetic and helpless, chained up.
MC: You're wasting your time with me..I don't know anything.
Marvolo: *rests his head on the bars, twiddling his fingers over one of them* Oh hardly wasting my time..I dont need to know a damn thing about the gang you run with.
MC: ..Then why am I here? *frowns*
Marvolo: *devilish smile* Not sure yet...I certainly can't let you go...But I also don't want to kill you...
MC: ......So you're just going to keep me here?
Marvolo: Well...Like I said...I dont know what I wish do with you, yet..Be a shame to kill a pretty doll such as yourself. *smirks*
MC: *spits at him*
Marvolo: *small wicked smile as he quickly enters the cell, and grabs her by her jaw, forcing her to look up at him*
MC: (?!) *frowny little expression*
Marvolo: Teaching you some fucking manners could be first on the agenda....And seeing as you like spitting so much...*sinful smirk* Open that fucking mouth for me...
~
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enpr-ss · 1 year
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Now that I'm thinking about it, why doesn't any of the 7th Division recognize Teru? Shouldn't they be like "hey wasn't this the kid that kicked our asses like 3 years ago, and we should try kidnapping him again?" My headcanon sequence of events:
Claw's 7th Division is established in Seasoning City. There's lot of jostling for power among the Scars, so there's a high turnover rate and things are very disorganized (as if this ever stopped lol)
A Scar hears about this little psychic boy and orders their goons to take him in for brainwashing
Tiny baby 10 year old Hanazawa Teruki beats the shit out of the Claw goons.
Oh what a coincidence, this occurs around the same time as the Ritsu Incident… because narrative parallels that's why
(This experience with Claw later inspires Teru to become the Urabancho when some delinquents try to bully him during his first year in junior high and he bullies them back, because he wants underlings too damn it. Although it probably just accidentally happened like with Mob and Onigawara)
The Scar loses their standing due to this hilarious failure to obtain a tiny child, and either flees via branch transfer or more likely, dies from the infighting. Claw politics are vicious y'all. But what about the goons? They're probably all dead too.
Except for one. Someone who was smart enough to run away when things got out of hand. Someone who has been with Claw since the beginning, and didn't survive this long without some good instincts. Someone who now viscerally understands the difference between a Natural esper and anyone else. This guy:
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It's motherfucking Gen-san everyone
Anyways back to the timeline:
7th Division moves on because they don't actually care about expanding, they only care about their own standing. All the 7th Division Scars we see in canon have no idea who Hanazawa Teruki is. However, they know enough to send actual espers to get any future kids, because the goons are incompetent
7th Division Arc happens, and everyone scatters. Most of the goons return to normal society, but some just showed up at another branch a few weeks later.
World Dom Arc begins
But wait! If the data from the 7th Division never got back to HQ, then how did Claw know who to go after during World Dom? There are two possibilities:
The boring, probably canon one: Shou, knowing that this information was going to his father regardless of him, snitches! However, he then made sure that anyone sent after the targets would be weak.
My more fun headcanon: I don't think Shou would snitch on Teru or Reigen without making sure that they would escape unharmed, and he only had plans for the Kageyama household. But if Shou didn't snitch, then who did? I vote this guy:
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The flame guy that Teru sent into a wall!
Probably what happened was that Touichirou sent his most annoying upper echelon Claws to eliminate any potential esper threats in Seasoning City; aka whoever took down the 7th Division. These Claws took one look at Reigen's website, saw his Twitter mentions, and was like lol this guy's a fake. But as a reward for his useful information, Flame guy gets to set fire to Reigen's office. No one had the presence of mind to go after Reigen's apartment despite him being doxxed already.
And the Claw that went after Teru? Well, he's one to hold grudges, and he never forgot the little psychic boy that utterly humiliated him and got him chased out of the 7th Division.
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jaypilled · 1 year
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Four, three, two, fuck you
Listen up y'all, this shit is histrionic
Monstrox’s beats are best suited to jesters hooked on phonics!
Jestrolicious: definition, makes the knights go cray cray
They want to know the secrets that they can't just hear from Clay-clay
Dyin' just to know my issues
I ain't givin’ them no tissues!
Don’t try asking me my reasons
My mood just comes and goes like seasons
(Four, three, two, Fuck you)
I'm Jestrolicious (so malicious)
No, I don't do heroics
And if you think otherwise
All that shit is fictitious
I blow kisses (mwah!)
Don't matter if I’m a bad guy
Monstrox be tryna’ throw me off in an attempt to make me cry
So malicious (trickery)
So malicious (completely filled with deceit)
So malicious (even Macy wants a piece of me)
I'm Jestrolicious (th-th-th-they can’t stand me, stand me)
Jestrolicious def-
Jestrolicious def-
Goddammit, Monstrox stop messing around with my mic-
Jestrolicious definition makes the knights annoyed
Monstox’s always screechin', weirdo pet names like jokeboy
I'm the j to the e, s, t, the r, the o
And the majority of chaos had better come from me
I'm Jestrolicious (so malicious)
My monsters stay vicious
All the knights are feelin' nervous 'cuz I'm being villainous
Monstrox’s my witness (whistle)
Bet that book loves all my tricks
And he'll be needing all my help 'cuz I make the knights shit bricks
So malicious (trickery)
So malicious (completely filled with deceit)
So malicious (even Richmond wants a piece of me)
I'm Jestrolicious (now you nexofuckers hold the fuck up, check it out)
Baby, baby, baby
If you really hate me
Honey get some spells
Maybe then you'll match me
I'll be casting, casting
I'll be lasting, lasting
I’m just casting, casting
It'll make you nasty
N to the a, to the s-t-e-y - fuckin' nasty, n to the a to the s-t-e-y - fuckin' nasty
M to the a, to the l-i-c-i-o-u-s, to the m, to the a, to the, to the--
I'll just spell it out for you
All the time i run around knights gather round always swingin’ at me, wanna guess the secrets of my book
I just wanna say it now - I ain't trying to round up any drama, pesky knights I just don't want you to know
And I guess I'm coming off as just a little insecure although I keep on repeating how my secret’s just private
But I'm tryin' to tell, it's a secret that I just don't wanna tell
Monstox says I look…
Malicious (so malicious)
No, I don't do heroics
And if you think otherwise
All that shit is fictitious
I blow kisses (mwah!)
Don't matter if I’m a bad guy
Monstrox be tryna’ throw me off in an attempt to make me cry
My monsters stay vicious
All the knights are feelin' nervous 'cuz I'm being villainous
Monstrox’s my witness (whistle)
Bet that book knows all my tricks
And he'll be my companion 'cuz I can use him in my shticks
So malicious (monstrox see)
So malicious (you can trust me)
So malicious (i'll help you be)
I'm Jestrolicious, I-I’m evil, evil
It's so malicious (ay, ay, ay, ay)
So malicious (ay, ay, ay, ay)
So malicious (ay, ay, ay, ay)
I'm Jestrolicious, (Monstrox says I’m so evil, evil)
N to the a, to the s-t-e-y - fuckin' nasty, n to the a to the s-t-e-y - fuckin' nasty
M to the a, to the l-i-c-i-o-u-s
N to the a, to the s t e y - fuckin' nasty. n to the a, to the, to the, to the, to the
To the m to the a, to the l-i-c-i-o-u-s
To the m to the a, to the l-i-c-i-o-u-s
To the m to the a, to the l-i-c-i-o-u-s to the m, to the a, to the...now, wait just a motherfuckin' second
Do I seriously have to spell this stuff until the end of the damn song?
I mean, whoever decided to write the original never had access to a spellbook I guess
Because n-a-s-t-e-y does not spell nasty. Was this ”fancypants” prick illiterate or something?
What do you mean robot rap artists are the only ones brave enough to write their own grammatical train wrecks and call it music!? What the fuck even is Brickney Spears doing?
She doesn't create lyrical masterpieces anymore!?
Fuck this gag, I quit!
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lilbreck · 6 months
Text
Sister, Maiden, Monster: Chapter 0-2
author: Lucy A. Snyder
Warning ahead for some body horror, capitalism horror (y'all know that's a real thing), medical malpractice, and light cannibalism. There will be so many spoilers. Yes, I'm putting in a read more tag for that.
Chapter 0
This book so far gets points for not taking long to jump into the first character coming down with PVG. And it's brutal from the get go. It didn't turn my stomach (probably because I read a lot of body horror and was prepared), but it did make me squirm in sympathy.
Chapter 1
When Erin thought about her then-boyfriend or whatever giving her genital warts the first time they slept together... I would have thought you should see that as a bad omen. I don't know that this guy is going to be an ass, but she didn't mention him when we were in her apartment before the flashback to the asylum, so I'm assuming he ditched the woman he had planned to marry. Yes, I'm judgy.
Speaking of the flashbacks, we're getting out first taste of the not normal body horror. Normal would be the violent vomiting from Chapter 0. This chapter we get teeth growing in strange pores on the tongue. We don't only get hit with body horror, there's also the real life horror of capitalism:
"And even though I'm chronically ill, and chronically a danger to my community and myself, the world still expects people like me to make it to work on time."
I see someone took notes during the heights of the pandemic.
I'm pretty sure the dream at the end of chapter 1 laid out what was going to be happening in the book and I am here for it.
Chapter 2
I'd bet good money that all the forms they had Erin sign as soon as she came to game them permission to feed her human blood and brains. I'd also bet good money that they knew damn good and well that she wasn't coherent enough to read, let alone understand what she was signing. Are we even worthy of survival as a species when we willingly give up our humanity like that? I know that kind of thing has happened, and continues to happen today, and my question still stands.
I'm gonna close the book for the night (restraint! I have it!), but I'll leave you with this dark little quote:
And in the back of my diseased mind, a perversion of a children's song echoed:
Brains, brains, the magical meat. The worse you feel, the more you eat. The more you eat, the more vicious you get. Brain eaters are the wors't kind of threat!
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finiffy · 2 years
Note
It's finally done!🎉
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Warning: this is my first fanfic ever. (And it gets stupid very fast.)
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Twas a normal day for Simon Glass. Constantly bottling up the fact that he murdered iceberg, bright almost seeing his face before killing someone, so on so forth. But as he was walking down the hallway to his office he heard some form of snarling which can only be described to be the devil's coming from clefs office, he was concerned, horrified, AND curious to see what was happening in there. So he knocked the door (bum ba-da-da-da da-da) but there was no response. "Clef, you okay in there?" "Ghrrrashehshhhhh". Yep. There it was again. He decided to open the door.
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The door creaked open, he went inside because he is stupid and he knows it. "Ukelele. This better just be you trying to be an ultra edgelor-" Francis attacked at glass, badly injuring him.
With quick thinking- he kicked Francis back, then ran for it. Francis started running after him. He took a left- so did Francis. He BARELY managed to outrun the creature that is Francis. As soon as he got to the medical room he slammed the door, locked it then backed up. He checked out the wounds. He looked in the mirror "damn it all!" He thought, examining the bite mark on his arm (he had scratches everywhere but this is the important one for some reason🙄). The wound itself looked deep, and he was losing a lot of blood. However, after patching all the injuries up he decided not to test for any (like a dumbass) diseases he might've gotten. He then went on with his Jolly day.
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It was months. He still hasn't checked the wound out and he was starting to feel reeaally strange. He FINALLY decided to check it out and low and behold, he got an unknown disease. He was shocked, for he wouldn't have known how he gotten SOME UNKNOWN DISEASE (DBAJJSHSKAHJUG YOU DUMBASS BITCH. YOU GOT IT FROM FRANCIS DBSIDHSJDHJK.🤬) he decides to ignore it because he CLEARLY has a will to live (sarcasm).
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bright was walking along going to his 8:30am appointment thingy-mah-bob and when he got there glass was acting strange. He was acting like a sick stray cat that hasn't seen a human in its life. Scared, confused and vicious. Luckily bright has multiple granola bars in his pocket for whenever his adoptive father figure clef is like this. He threw the granola bar in his face and Simon ate it (wrapper and all). Did not work. Yep. So what do you do? You keep tossing granola bars in his face until he calms down! After glass wrecked his own office out of rage he finally calmed down. "Chchchchchchchchch" bright clicked his tongue as though he was trying to call a cat over. Finally Simon approached the doomed nutcase out of curiosity.
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Two hours later jack Bright was hand-feeding the creature Simon pizza and fries, somehow not being Glass's dinner (feral-character whisperer.) Then he heard footsteps outside. "Hello?" It was one of o5-6's husbands. "Go away I'm having dinner with glass." Glass snarled as though he understood what Bright was saying, even though this unknown disease made him forget a quarter and a half of his vocabulary (But he's still smarter than pre-feral glass!🎉🎉)
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fishy note: Now before y'all go "why should he have checked for any diseases from a human bite" this is CLEF we're talking about here. Who knows what other diseases he might have other than the unknown disease. Part two Will probably won't come out for a long time. Want me to write a story about the flute-k***ys?
- walking fish anon
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FERAL GLASS!!
This is really good especially for your first fic with the right amount of crack that I fucking love plus with the other references. Also yes...I would die for a Flute and K***y story
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crossbowking · 3 years
Text
Honey & Whiskey
Summary: (Set throughout series) When the world ended, everything good died along with it. At least, that's what Daryl Dixon thought. But then he met a stranger in the woods and his entire world turned upside down.
A/N: HOLY MOLY. I can't believe it's here! I've been working on this story since October and I'm so excited for y'all to finally read it. This story is absolutely my favorite of all time and it's 20,835 words of pure Daryl POV (which is just *chef kiss*) — that being said, it’s also a slow burn...and I mean an entirely self-indulgent SLOWWWW burn. So strap in, y’all.
PSA: There are mentions of 'Dog' in this story that are sort of non-canon, especially now that we've seen a backstory as to how Daryl actually found him in the show...so for the sake of the story, let's just pretend 10.18 doesn't exist :)
Anywho, please be sure to share your thoughts with me afterward!
Happy reading!
xx Jess
Masterlist
Tip Jar
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The sun dipped below the horizon, the sky alight with brilliant orange and yellow rays.
Daryl tilted his head back, glancing up at the shifting colors as night drew near. The air was crisp, a welcomed change from the usual summer heat. The streets of Alexandria were fairly empty, most already settling into their respective homes before nightfall. Though the unusual silence was near deafening, the archer paid it no mind.
He appreciated the quiet these days.
The grass poked and prodded beneath where he sat, but he simply shifted, drawing one knee to his chest, the other leg splayed out in front of him. He picked absently at one of the holes in his worn jeans, tugging at the string hanging off the fabric.
And then he thought of her.
Leaves and twigs crunched beneath Daryl’s boots as he traversed through the otherwise silent woods.
The farm was destroyed, winter was approaching, and there seemed to be an ever-looming pang of hunger in the pit of his stomach. He pushed away any inkling of weakness, forging ahead with determined strides. His people were waiting for him, hunkering down in an abandoned diner less than a mile East, hoping he’d bring back something to dull the growing ache inside all of them.
Daryl’s steps faltered — ‘his’ people.
The thought had come so naturally it nearly took him off guard. The feeling of community, of belonging, was something he’d never felt in his entire life. It was a strange notion, but that drive, that need he felt to provide, pushed him further out into the forest.
The archer kept his footsteps light, practically imperceptible, listening for noises only a seasoned hunter could distinguish. When a twig suddenly snapped off to his left, he froze, scanning the stillness around him. He raised his crossbow, the weight familiar in his grasp as he took a small step in the direction the noise had come from.
A moment later, Daryl spotted it — a lone raccoon just a few yards ahead.
The archer felt a rush of adrenaline, a tingling sensation in his fingertips as they hovered over the trigger. He exhaled a soft breath, focusing all his attention on the animal. But with his concentration elsewhere, it wasn’t until after he’d pulled the trigger that he’d realized he was no longer alone in the woods.
Daryl spun around, coming face to face with an incredibly grotesque-looking walker, teeth bared, arms outstretched, launching itself towards him. The archer braced his arm against the biter’s throat just in time, grunting under its weight as he stumbled backward.
“Shit,” he snarled through gritted teeth, tossing his unloaded weapon aside as he fought against the attack. Using his free hand, he reached for the hunting knife secured on his belt, grabbing onto the hilt.
But before he could yank it out, the world began tilting rapidly around him.
Daryl’s back slammed against the harsh wooded ground, his foot tangled up in an exposed root. He spat another vicious curse as the walker thrashed on top of him, snapping its mangled jaw closer and closer, growling in starved desperation.
Then suddenly, it stilled.
The archer froze, his gaze locked on the unexpected sight of one of his arrows now embedded through the biter’s temple. He snapped out of his reverie, shoving the dead off his chest and scrambling back to his feet.
And then he saw her.
She stood just a few feet away, her rapid breathing mirroring his own, looking as though she was seconds away from passing out. Her hair was matted by a mixture of blood and dirt, her clothes were torn and ratted, her wide eyes seemingly too big for her gaunt features. She had a nasty cut across her temple, blood dripping down the side of her face, past her neck, pooling at the collar of her shirt.
Daryl’s eyes bounced back up to meet hers — his guarded and calloused, hers unsure and fatigued.
“I’m assuming — this — is yours?” she spoke between heaving breaths, tossing something in his direction, the motion causing her to sway unsteadily.
Daryl glanced down, spotting the raccoon he’d shot earlier now lying at his feet — but the arrow he’d used to kill it was no longer there.
Now, it was lodged through the skull of the walker that’d attacked him.
The archer focused back on the stranger — but before he could respond, her skin was suddenly paling, her body crumpling to the ground like a paper doll.
Daryl stared down at her unmoving form in bewilderment. He could tell by the shallow rise and fall of her chest that she was at least breathing. The cut on her temple was still bleeding, the wound looking fairly recent — his best guess was a concussion or exhaustion. Most likely both.
He took a small step forward, almost hesitantly. But when his approach didn’t stir the stranger, he found himself facing an unforeseen decision.
He could leave her — he should leave her. She wasn’t his responsibility. She was a complete stranger. She chose to intervene, not him. She made that choice. Not him. Her.
Though as he turned to leave, as he scooped up the limp raccoon and shoved it into his bag, as he grabbed his strewn crossbow and strapped it across his back, one thing became startlingly clear.
He couldn’t do it — he couldn’t just walk away.
Daryl huffed a defeated breath. “Shit.”
He could’ve sworn that day in the woods was an entire lifetime ago.
Rick had nearly lost his damn mind when he’d returned to the diner with not only a small woodland creature in his pack, but a stranger slung over his shoulder.
“Is she dead?” Carl pressed nosily, hovering by the booth where the stranger was now laid out, still unconscious.
Lori quickly intervened, moving forward with one hand on her protruding belly, the other grabbing onto Carl’s shoulder. “Step back, baby. Give Hershel some space to work, okay?” she cautioned, pulling the inquisitive boy away.
“Oh, it’s quite alright — I’m just about done here anyways,” Hershel drawled, setting aside the blood-soaked cloth he’d been using to tend to the stranger’s head wound.
Daryl watched the exchange from across the room, arms folded tight against his chest, ignoring the stares coming from other group members.
The front door of the diner suddenly swung open as Rick marched through. He shot the archer a disapproving look before addressing the others. “I think we’re okay,” he finally spoke, re-holstering his pistol. “If Daryl had been followed here, I’m sure we would’ve known by now. We’ll keep somebody on watch — jus’ as a precaution — an’ get back on the road first thing.”
The archer gnawed on the inside of his cheek as the rest of the group began whispering amongst themselves, clearly distressed about the possible danger his decision may have put them in.
Rick approached a moment later, his steadfast strides immediately setting Daryl on edge. “Can I speak with you?” the sheriff hissed, glancing over his shoulder and locking eyes with Lori’s worried gaze. “In private?” he added in a hushed tone before turning around and storming back outside.
Daryl scoffed under his breath, pushing away from the counter he’d been leaning against and stalking after Rick.
The archer yanked the door open, the cool air biting at his skin as he followed suit. He spotted Rick pacing back and forth across the parking lot, surveying the surrounding woods warily before spinning around and facing him head-on.
“What the hell were you thinkin’?” Rick demanded, taking a step forward.
Daryl fought back the instinctual urge to be on the attack. Instead, he took a breath. “What was I supposed ta’ do, man? Jus’ leave her out there?” he countered, eyes narrowing.
“You don’t bring her here,” the sheriff snapped before pinching the bridge of his nose, attempting to collect himself. “We — we have ta’ look after our own, Daryl — you know that. We have no idea who she is, where she came from, who she’s with,” he specified sharply before shaking his head. “That’s jus' not a risk I’m willin’ ta’ take. Are you?”
Daryl held Rick’s gaze for a long moment before looking away, glancing towards the tree line. The sheriff had a point, he couldn’t deny that. But there was something inside him, a nagging sensation in the pit of his stomach that said otherwise.
Rick slowly nodded, interpreting Daryl’s silence as an answer. “When she wakes, she’s gone,” he finally resolved, stepping past the archer and back towards the diner without another word.
But Daryl couldn’t let it go. “Hey,” he called after Rick, the sheriff’s strides halting mid-pace as he glanced back, the harshness in his features fading, unveiling a man with nothing but the weight of the world on his shoulders. “Back when Carl got shot, if Hershel had turned us away, what’d ya think would’a happened?”
Rick paused before exhaling a long, heavy breath, some of the fight leaving him with it. “That’s not — it’s not the same —”
“It is,” Daryl interjected. “It’s the same damn thing.”
The air grew quiet as Rick’s shoulders sagged, one hand resting against his hip. “My family…” he suddenly murmured, shaking his head sadly. “I can’t risk it.”
Daryl nodded once. “I get it. After everythin’ with Shane an’ Randall, losin’ the farm the way we did, I get it, man,” he rasped, regarding him earnestly. “But m’ tellin’ ya…this’s the wrong call, Rick.”
The diner door suddenly flung open, interrupting the conversation and revealing a flustered-looking Glenn.
“Uh, hey guys,” he interrupted, sending the pair an awkward wave. “Just wanted to let you know that she’s, uh — she’s awake.”
Rick and Daryl shared a look.
“And kinda freaking out,” Glenn quickly tacked on at the end.
Daryl didn’t hesitate. He stormed past Rick and back into the diner, making a beeline towards the small crowd that had gathered around her.
“— okay, it’s okay. We’re not gonna hurt you, sweetheart,” Lori spoke softly, holding her hands out in front of her as though approaching a caged animal.
The archer pushed through the group, spotting the stranger a moment later.
She was still sitting in the booth he’d initially laid her out in — though now she was huddled away from everyone, back pressed up against the wall, knees drawn to her chest in a cowering stance. Her gaze darted frantically around the room, clearly confused and disoriented and overwhelmed.
Daryl couldn’t even begin to understand why, but he felt a wave of outrage course through him.
“C’mon, people. She ain’t a fuckin’ zoo animal,” the archer growled abruptly, taking a defensive stance in front of the booth and motioning for the rest of the group to move back. “Give the girl some damn space.”
The archer waited until everyone stepped away before turning back around and glancing down at the stranger. He was surprised to see her eyes trained on him — even more surprised at the flush of heat that spread across his chest. He held her gaze a second longer before Rick appeared, parting through the crowd like Moses and the Red Sea.
The stranger shrunk away.
Daryl wondered why the sight bothered him so much.
Rick came to a slow halt in front of her. “What’s your name?” he finally asked, his tone measured and firm.
The stranger did another sweep of the room, as though surveying just how much possible danger she was in. But when her eyes flashed up towards the archer once again, some of her unease faded. “Y/N,” she spoke hesitantly.
Rick nodded slowly before extending his arm. “Rick Grimes.”
Y/N looked at the gesture cautiously. Still, she reached out and took his hand in hers.
She appeared composed but Daryl noticed the slight tremble in her grip.
After a brief shake, Rick grabbed an empty chair and sat down at the end of the booth, resting his forearms against the table. “So, Y/N,” he began, giving the archer a look of resolve. “What happened ta’ you?”
The time after the farm fell was foggy, each day blurring into the next, suffocated by a heaviness the unknown inherently brought. But that day, the day he met her, ran stark against the rest.
Y/N had told her story like Rick asked her to do. She spoke of the small group she’d been staying with and the refuge they’d built, ultimately destroyed by the dead. Everybody had scattered — and if they hadn’t…
Any previous hesitancies the group held melted into understanding and sympathy almost immediately.
Daryl had known Y/N would be accepted into the group. Rick had hardened since the farm, but he wasn’t heartless. He wouldn’t be able to turn her away, just as the archer hadn’t been able to leave her out in those woods.
Spending the winter season on the run had been difficult for everyone — constantly running from the dead, cold and bitter nights, supplies growing scarce. The road was unforgiving, proving time and time again how completely fucked this new world was, how things would never return to the way they were, how this was now the new way of life.
Though for Daryl, if he was being honest, it wasn’t all bad — not in comparison to what his old life had given him.
He’d choose a lifetime of running over the stench of whiskey and the sting of belt buckles any day.
The only other person who’d appeared unaffected was Y/N. Besides showcasing a natural skillset in survival, she’d found her place amongst the group with ease — so effortlessly that Daryl hadn’t been able to recall what life looked like before her. She exuded a warmth that people were drawn towards — that the rest of the group clung to during the darkest of days.
But not Daryl.
He’d kept her at a distance, kept her at arm’s length because he refused to let her in as everyone else had.
Little did he know.
Daryl swiped at the beads of sweat dripping down the sides of his face.
The Georgian heat was nearly suffocating, blanketing over his body and setting his skin ablaze. He pushed away the discomfort, bending down and grabbing the ankles of one of the many walkers spread out across the prison’s courtyard. He’d lost track of how many bodies he’d dragged out, his group working tirelessly to clean out their newfound home.
The archer had just pulled the limp body through one of the fences, nearing the pickup truck used for disposal, when he heard someone approach.
“Need a hand?”
Daryl stilled — he glanced up, his eyes locking with Y/N’s, a small smile tugging at her lips.
Her hair was pulled back out of her face, a thin sheen of sweat laid out across her forehead. One hand rested on her hip, the other hovered near her face, blocking the sun rays. The sleeves of her shirt were rolled up past her elbows, streaks of dirt and blood visible against her exposed skin.
He realized then that she was really rather beautiful.
The intrusive thought caught the archer completely off guard. He quickly turned his attention downward, grunting a half-assed ‘nah’ before continuing his trek to the pickup truck, determined to preserve some space between them.
But instead of leaving, as he’d assumed she would, Y/N remained rooted in place.
Daryl faltered, the expression that flickered across her face hinting that maybe she hadn’t come to just ‘lend a helping hand’. She had something on her mind — he could tell by the way she snagged her bottom lip between her teeth, gnawing absently as she shifted her weight back and forth.
The archer dropped his hold from around the walker’s ankles and straightened. “What?” he demanded gruffly, curiosity getting the best of him.
Y/N’s eyes found his as she took a small step forward — Daryl fought back the urge to back up. “I, uh —” she paused, her mouth twisting to the side as though fumbling for the right words. “Just — thank you.”
Daryl’s brow furrowed. “For what?” he huffed.
Y/N’s head cocked to the side, seemingly surprised. “I — I don’t know,” she murmured, a soft, sort of bewildered laugh slipping past her lips. “For bringing me here, for introducing me to your people — for everything, I guess,” she expressed sincerely. “You could’ve just left me out in those woods that day — most people would’ve.”
The archer chewed on the inside of his cheek, feeling incredibly exposed for some strange reason. “Was nothin’,” he finally grunted, ignoring the prickle of heat at the tips of his ears.
“It wasn’t nothing,” Y/N replied indignantly, like she was offended at the notion that he didn’t deserve her gratitude. “You saved my life.”
Daryl shifted uncomfortably, wanting nothing more than for this interaction to be over with — because once that happened, he could go back to maintaining his distance, he could go back to allowing the air between them to be just that. “Figured I owed ya,” he finally mustered, recalling the first day they’d met.
Y/N’s lips curled up into a megawatt smile and Daryl could’ve sworn he’d never seen anything so damn captivating in his entire life. “Okay,” she grinned, sticking her hand out in front of her. “We’ll call it even then.”
The archer glanced down at the gesture before warily reaching forward, taking her hand in his, and shaking once, twice, three times. Her grip was firm and she didn’t seem to mind the grime coating his skin.
When she pulled away, Daryl felt the empty spaces she’d filled set ablaze.
Y/N shot him one last smile before turning around and heading back towards the courtyard. But she’d only made it a few feet when she paused, glancing over her shoulder. “Make sure you eat something, okay?”
She didn’t wait for a response — instead, she narrowed her eyes, shooting him a look in mock-seriousness as if to say ‘I’m watching you’. Then her face broke out into another grin before she sent him a small wave — and she was gone.
Daryl watched her leave, unable to pull his gaze from her retreating form.
He tried to ignore the mess his mind was becoming, littered with confusion and insecurity, the nagging voice that lingered telling him he’d never be good enough, strong enough, brave enough for anything other than what he’d always known.
He wouldn’t let her in — he couldn’t let her in.
But as he bent down, grasping onto either ankle of the walker at his feet, he felt a tingling sensation in his fingertips he swore had everything to do with the Georgian heat and nothing to do with her.
A gentle breeze roused Daryl from his thoughts.
He shifted from where he sat, reaching into the pocket of his jeans for the pack of cigarettes he kept there.
The package was falling apart, half-crushed, half-wrinkled from everyday wear and tear, but the archer slipped one of the few remaining cigarettes out anyway and caught it between his lips.
It hadn’t taken long for him to realize that keeping Y/N at arm’s length was a futile attempt — he’d been naive to think it was possible in the first place.
Before he knew it, she’d wormed her way into the forefronts of his mind and found herself a nice, cozy corner to call home. She’d done it as effortlessly as the blink of an eye or the beat of a heart. It just happened — no rhyme or reason, no explanation or logic. It just happened.
Which made leaving that much harder.
“Daryl!”
The archer ignored Glenn’s shout, marching further into the woods and approaching a snide-looking Merle. “C’mon, bro,” the younger brother grunted, worried if they didn’t leave right then and there, he’d change his mind and return to the prison with the others.
Merle’s booming laugh sounded, drawing Daryl from his thoughts. “Well, I’ll be damned,” the man sneered, tossing an arm around the archer’s shoulders. “Looks like somebody decided ta’ grow himself a big ole’ pair a’ cojones while I was gone,” he snarked, pushing Daryl forward and falling in step beside him.
The archer pressed his lips together, swallowing his retort and focusing ahead.
“Hey, wait up!”
The voice that sounded halted Daryl in his tracks. He spun around, spotting Y/N making her way through the forest, her strides long and determined as she headed straight towards him.
“Well, would ya look a’ that,” Merle quipped under his breath, leering at her approach, his tone sending a swell of aggravation through the younger brother.
“Jus’ gimme a minute,” Daryl quickly waved him off, ignoring the prickle of heat creeping up his neck as he trudged towards her.
Y/N came to a stop in front of him, slightly out of breath, her eyes searching his for a long moment.
She seemed to have something to say, a reason for chasing after him — but it was as though she couldn’t get the words together. She glanced down, shaking her head slowly before taking a deep breath. When she looked back up, Daryl noticed a resignation in her gaze that wasn’t there before.
“Are you sure about this?” she finally asked, her troubled expression sending a pang of guilt through him.
Daryl looked away. Truthfully, he wasn’t sure — he wasn’t sure about anything anymore.
He shifted his weight, focusing back on her. “Ya watch out for yourself, ya hear me?” he rumbled, pushing away the unexpected worry gnawing at him.
Y/N’s shoulders sagged in disappointment, her defeated expression damn near changing his mind altogether. “I will,” she murmured, a bittersweet smile ghosting across her features.
Daryl held her gaze a moment longer before nodding once, turning without another word.
But he’d barely taken a step when he suddenly felt her grab his wrist and twist him back around.
Before he knew what was happening, Y/N was hugging him. She threw her arms around his middle and squeezed tight, leaving Daryl completely and utterly dumbfounded. His arms hung limply at his sides, caught off guard by the surprising gesture. Though as soon as it’d begun, it ended. Y/N unwound herself from around his body and took a step back, a pink tinge to her cheeks he hadn’t noticed earlier.
She whispered a somber goodbye — though Daryl couldn’t hear it over the sound of the blood rushing to his ears — and then she was gone.
The archer fought back the urge to follow, telling himself over and over again that he was making the right decision — he was choosing blood, he was choosing family, he was choosing —
“Hey! Where’s my hug at, sweet cheeks?” Merle’s suddenly hollered, calling after Y/N.
She didn’t look back and Daryl fought back the impulse to start swinging.
But Merle just laughed, the noise loud and boisterous as he sauntered forward. “Damn, lil’ brother. Didn’t think ya had it in ya! I was startin’ ta’ think ya played for the other fuckin’ team’,” he jeered, clapping the archer on the back with more force than necessary.
Daryl’s entire body tensed up, his darkened gaze snapping towards his brother. He noticed then that Merle was also watching Y/N — though his eye line was fixated on one specific part of her body…
“Let’s go,” the archer spat under his breath as he spun around and stormed off, his hands balling into fists.
He had to walk away. Otherwise, he’d lose it — he’d give in to instinct, he’d allow the rage coursing through him to take over, and all of this would’ve been for nothing.
So he took a deep breath, relaxed his clenched fists, and dismissed any lingering thoughts of her.
Daryl scoffed at the memory, an unlit cigarette still caught between his teeth.
He pulled out his lighter and flicked his thumb against the wheel, sparking a small flame before inhaling a deep breath. The familiar taste of nicotine and ash filled his senses as he drew smoke into his lungs, immediately feeling a rush of calm flow through him.
Daryl existed in the quiet, taking another long drag of his cigarette. He pulled his legs towards his chest, resting his elbows atop his knees, letting his hands dangle in front of him. He watched the lit cigarette butt dim and dance between his fingertips, the embers burning off and drifting into the grass.
It’d only taken a single day for the archer to come to his senses — to realize the mistake he’d made in leaving with his brother. And if he was being honest, it’d had nothing to do with Merle. He couldn’t blame his brother because his brother hadn’t changed — his brother was still the same brash, volatile, ill-tempered redneck he’d known his whole life.
No, it was him — he was the one who had changed.
“Would ya slow yer damn roll? I ain’t the athlete I used ta’ be, ya know!” Merle bellowed from somewhere behind Daryl, clearly struggling to keep up with the younger brother’s pace.
But the archer didn’t slow, his strides matching the beat of his pounding heart. He ducked under tree branches and side-stepped exposed roots, the prison growing nearer with each step he took.
It wasn’t until Daryl heard a sudden thud, followed by a viciously snarled curse, that he slowed. He spun around, spotting Merle pushing up off the forest floor.
“Ya good?” Daryl called out, crossing back and reaching down, offering his hand.
But Merle just swatted him away, his expression twisting in contempt as he staggered back to his feet. “Lemme ask ya somethin’,” he growled. “How the hell ya think this’s gonna go, huh? Ya think those assholes are jus’ gonna forget ‘bout everythin’ that happened? Ya think we’re jus’ gonna hug it out an’ sing ‘round the campfire like some kinda damn afternoon special?”
The archer fought back the urge to roll his eyes. “Ya —”
“This ‘bout that skirt from yesterday? Huh? That it?” Merle steamrolled over his attempt to interrupt, taking a step forward, the brothers now toe to toe.
Daryl felt a prickle of heat flush the back of his neck, his chest tightening. Merle was just trying to get a rise out of him — he knew that deep down — but damn, was it working. “It ain’t ‘bout her,” the archer growled defensively, fixing him with a glare. “It’s ‘bout survival, ’bout rebuildin’ — ‘bout tryin’ ta’ make somethin’ outta this shit world. It can’t jus’ be us out here, man — not anymore.”
Merle rolled his eyes. “Oh, c’mon, did Officer Friendly force-feed ya that bullshit?”
Daryl stiffened before huffing a breath and waving his brother off. He turned away, determined to continue his trek back home before it was too late — but he’d only made it a couple of feet when Merle called after him once more.
“It ain’t ever gonna work,” the older brother voiced, his usually brash tone dimming into something surprisingly vulnerable. “It — it jus’ ain’t. Not after everythin’ — not after what I did.”
The archer glanced back, watching Merle’s notorious bravado finally melt away, replaced with something he could’ve sworn looked like guilt. “We ain’t dead yet, man,” Daryl rumbled simply. “Still time ta’ make shit right.”
Merle considered his words for a long moment — but before he could respond, the sound of barraging gunfire exploded through the air.
Daryl’s head snapped in the direction of the noise, feeling his stomach drop when he realized where exactly it was coming from.
He took off into a sprint, Merle’s pounding footsteps echoing directly behind him.
Daryl lied to his brother that day.
In his defense, it hadn’t been deliberate. When Merle had questioned his intentions, alluding to the idea that Y/N was the main reason for his urgency to return home, the archer had denied it.
He hadn’t known it back then, but the truth became startlingly clear once he’d made it back to the prison, marched up the pathway leading to cellblock C, and laid eyes on her.
Daryl found Y/N crouched down beside Axel’s unmoving form, one hand resting on his shoulder.
His steps faltered, feeling as though he was intruding on a private moment — but he couldn’t help himself. The Governor had attacked the prison, his people were shaken, and damn it, he just needed to make sure she was okay.
She stood a moment later, turning to rejoin the rest of the group huddled by the fence, her despondent expression filling his bones with a red-hot rage.
But then her eyes met his.
Y/N’s footsteps stilled, her gaze widening in disbelief as she looked at him. A heartbeat passed between them before Daryl noticed how she was holding herself — hunched over slightly, one hand wrapped around the opposite arm, blood seeping out from between her fingertips.
He crossed to her in three long strides, ignoring the heat that flushed his chest the closer he neared.
Instead, he focused on the wound — that he could deal with, that made sense.
Unlike the unexpected and rapid thrumming of his pulse.
“Daryl,” she breathed in disbelief, her voice thick as though the word had gotten tangled somewhere in her throat.
His name sounded like honey the way it rolled off her tongue.
He shrugged off his crossbow and tossed it aside, wordlessly reaching forward and pulling her hand away from the injury. He examined the laceration carefully — which upon closer inspection appeared to be a gunshot wound — though luckily enough, the bullet seemed to have only grazed the side of her arm.
The archer reached into his back pocket, grabbed the red rag he kept there, and gently pressed it against the wound. “Jus’ keep pressure on it, alright?” he rasped, guiding Y/N’s limp hand to rest over the cloth, stalling the blood flow.
He glanced down at her, doing a slight double-take when he realized she was watching him, a slightly strained smile pulling at her lips. “You came back,” she whispered, her eyes warm despite the blood splattered across her cheek, the pallor in her complexion.
Daryl swallowed the lump in his throat, incredibly aware of how little space remained between them. He managed a stiff nod in response, his voice suddenly lost.
But Y/N’s smile merely grew, like the first hint of sunshine after a devastating storm.
And the tightness in his chest finally faded.
The archer inhaled another long drag from his cigarette, the smoke spilling past his lips and disappearing into the growing night.
Returning to the prison had given Daryl a sense of purpose, a sense of hope — he was back where he belonged and the threat of the Governor just didn’t seem so insurmountable anymore.
And then his big brother went and got himself killed.
Daryl stormed across the field that led to the prison’s courtyard, shoulders set, fists balled, eyes rimmed red.
The Governor would pay — he’d pay for what he’d done.
To Glenn, to Maggie, to countless others.
He’d pay for what he did to Merle.
The archer’s footsteps faltered, only briefly, when he spotted Y/N pacing back and forth behind the gate. Her head snapped towards him as he approached, her worried expression melting into relief as she quickly pulled the gate open for him.
“You okay?” she called to him, brow furrowing as she craned her neck, now looking behind him. “Where’s Merle?”
Daryl kept his gaze forward, digging his fingernails into the palm of his hand as he marched past her without a second glance. “Dead,” he grunted, ignoring the prickling sensation growing behind his eyes.
“What?” he heard her exclaim, though he didn’t turn around — he kept his momentum pushing ahead, hellbent on going after the Governor and taking him down once and for all.
No matter what the cost.
He stalked towards where he’d parked his motorcycle, slinging his crossbow over his back and mounting the bike in one swift motion.
But Y/N was just as quick.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” she jogged towards him, planting herself in front of the bike, an alarmed look in her eyes. “What’re you doing?”
Daryl felt a swell of anger wash over him, an unusual feeling when directed towards her. “Move,” he growled, using his heel to knock the bike’s kickstand up.
Y/N’s brow furrowed, his intent becomingly startling clear. “No.”
He was caught off guard by her protest, though snapped out of it just as soon — his scowl deepened, his eyes darkening, seeing nothing but redness and fury and Merle’s reanimated corpse flickering through his mind. “Move, damn it,” he snarled once more.
But Y/N stood her ground regardless of the wariness in her gaze. “No.”
The archer’s rage churned inside him, his grip white-knuckled around the throttle. “Ya —”
“Please, don’t do this,” she interrupted his brusque retort, shaking her head. “I promise — I promise — he’ll get what’s coming to him, but Daryl…this is not the way.”
He knew deep down she was right, but he didn’t want to hear it — he didn’t want to hear ration or reason or the pity in her voice.
He didn’t want to hear any of it.
“I’m sorry,” she suddenly whispered, emotion clouding her eyes. “God, I’m so sorry about Merle. I’m —”
Something inside the archer snapped. “Ya know what, ya can drop the damn act,” he hissed, springing off the bike and shoving it to the ground with a deafening crash. He ignored the way Y/N flinched as he barreled towards her like a surging storm. “Ya can stop pretendin’ like anyone in this fuckin’ place gave a single shit ‘bout my brother!” he fired back, his voice rising. “Or me, for that matter!”
Y/N recoiled away from him, eyes wide. “I’m —” she started, shrinking under his heated approach. “I didn’t —”
“Forget it,” the archer spat, unable to stop the fervor spewing out of him. “Ya don’t know shit.”
A beat of silence passed as they stared one another down — but the more the quiet stretched on, the more a different emotion began to seep through the archer.
Guilt.
Unable to watch the hurt settling across Y/N’s features, Daryl turned away, allowing his brewing vehemence to carry him across the courtyard and to the doors leading into cellblock C. He paused at the doorway, unable to stop himself from looking back.
He watched Y/N’s head lower, her shoulders drop, before she slowly reached down, grabbing his toppled motorcycle by the handlebars and propping it upright.
The archer swallowed his remorse, buried his instincts, and stalked inside.
Daryl hissed a breath as the burnt end of the cigarette singed his fingertip. He stubbed the flame out against the heel of his boot, flicking the butt away into the grass.
Still, to this day, he felt bad about losing his temper. The anger had clearly been misdirected, but in the moment, he hadn’t been able to get a handle on it — Y/N had simply been in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Despite the aftermath of his outburst weighing heavily on him, he’d kept his distance from her throughout the days that followed.
Old habits die hard.
Daryl woke with a start, his eyes snapping open, chasing away lingering images of the nightmare he’d found himself immersed in.
Sleep had never been kind to him, even before everything went to shit — tonight was no different.
He could still see flashes of redness and death, smell the scent of rotting corpses and bloodshed, hear the sounds of tormented screams and anguished whimpers —
Daryl’s thoughts faltered as he quickly pushed up onto his elbows, straining his ears.
He realized then that the whimpering wasn’t coming from just his imagination. No, it was real — and it was coming from somewhere inside the cellblock.
The archer sprang up, untangling himself from the bed sheet coiled at his feet before shuffling towards the doorway. He paused there, his senses on high alert, the hair on the back of his neck standing on end as he listened carefully.
When another soft cry sounded, he moved from the entryway, slowly slinking past cell after cell and following the noise.
It wasn’t long before he found himself standing outside Y/N’s cell.
Daryl peered into the shadowed room, just barely able to make out the shape of her beneath the covers. She murmured something jumbled and incoherent, her words muffled as though her face was pressed into the pillow. She tossed and turned for a moment before finally settling.
When she remained still, the archer nearly left for his own cell.
But then he heard a quietly gasped sob and began moving forward before he could think twice.
Daryl crouched down beside Y/N’s bedside, turning on the lantern she’d left sitting on the floor. He shielded his eyes from the light until they adjusted before focusing on her.
She was curled up, covers drawn to her chin, faint tear tracks marking the sides of her face. Her brow was knitted, causing lines to form across her forehead — he fought back the urge to reach out and smooth them away.
Apparently, he wasn’t the only one sleep was unkind to.
Another soft whimper blew past her lips and Daryl reached for her, gently shaking her shoulder.
Y/N immediately jolted awake, shooting upright, disoriented and alarmed as her bleary eyes darted around the cell.
“Hey, hey,” Daryl quickly rasped, holding his hands out in front of him. “It’s alright.”
“What — what happened?” she croaked, her voice thick with sleep, her wide gaze finally settling on him.
The archer shook his head, pulling back slightly, second-guessing his decision to wake her. “Nothin’ — nothin’, alright? We’re okay.”
“What —” she sounded, a bewildered look flitting across her face as she settled her hand against her undoubtedly racing heart. “Are you okay?”
Daryl’s brow furrowed at her question, confused as to why that would be her next question and not ‘what the fuck are you doing in my cell?’ Regardless, he nodded once. “Yeah,” the archer brushed off her concern, sitting back on his haunches. “Ya — uh, ya were cryin’,” he revealed hesitantly, scratching the back of his neck as he watched for her reaction.
Y/N straightened, the top bunk just grazing the crown of her head as she dabbed her fingertip at the corner of her eye, appearing almost embarrassed suddenly. “Oh,” she whispered, wiping away the tears that’d formed.
Daryl gnawed on the inside of his cheek. “Ya alright?” he rasped after a long moment.
She quickly nodded her head, waving off his worry. “Oh, no — yeah, no, I’m fine,” she replied flippantly, shooting the archer a tight-lipped smile.
Despite Daryl seeing right through her bullshit, he didn’t push.
Instead, he nodded once and clambered back to his feet.
But he’d just barely turned to leave when Y/N spoke up once more. “Hey, Daryl?”
The archer faltered, glancing back at her. “Yeah?”
Her demeanor appeared collected, though he could see her hands twisting nervously around the sheet splayed out across his lap. “I —” she paused, seemingly working up the nerve to say what was next. “Are we okay?”
Daryl felt his chest tighten, the heaviness that’d grown between them splintering in that moment. There was something about her words, the smallness in her voice, that had him kicking himself for being so damn stubborn, for not making things right sooner.
She raked a hand through her tousled hair. “I just — I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have — I mean, I wasn’t trying to —”
“Stop,” Daryl cut off her rambling, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I was actin’ like an asshole,” he grumbled admittedly, the shame he’d buried creeping back in.
The tension in Y/N’s features softened as she regarded him. “It’s okay.”
For some reason, her easy forgiveness made Daryl’s insides churn.
“Nah, it ain’t,” he shot back sharply, almost wishing she’d curse him out instead. “Wasn’t right ta’ take that shit out on ya.”
“You were grieving,” she justified, her explanation simple and understanding.
Daryl worked his jaw, clenching and unclenching as he stared at the far wall of her cell, his gaze darkening — he didn’t deserve her compassion. “Well, ya probably stopped me from doin’ somethin’ real stupid,” he muttered dryly.
She merely shrugged, still completely unfazed. “Grief makes us do stupid things,” she murmured, defending him yet again. “I am sorry about your brother, you know,” she whispered a moment later, the sincerity in her voice knocking down the wall Daryl had worked so hard to keep between them.
He nodded slowly, clearing his throat before speaking again. “Merle was no hero,” he finally rumbled. “But he died tryin’ ta’ make shit right,” he mustered, his eyes finding hers amidst the shadows of her cell.
Y/N shot him a small, somewhat sad smile. “Then he didn’t die for nothing.”
Daryl swallowed the lump that formed in his throat, feeling as though his heart was moments away from bursting out of his chest. It was as though the cell was shrinking around him, the walls closing in — and the only thing keeping him above the surface was her.
“Get some sleep,” he managed gruffly, turning to leave once more.
“Daryl?”
The archer stilled. “Hm?” he sounded, not trusting his voice.
“Can you stay?” she whispered, so softly he almost missed it entirely. “Just a little longer?”
Daryl shifted his weight back and forth, feeling the overwhelming urge to run, to retreat to his own cell and pretend he hadn’t heard her.
But the slight tremble in her voice, something others surely would’ve missed, pulled him right back in.
The air thickened as he walked towards her, every fiber of his being screaming at him to make a run for it while he still had the chance. Y/N watched him approach, slightly wide-eyed, his steps faltering the closer he neared. She maneuvered slightly on the bed, moving towards the wall as though making room for him beside her.
Instead, Daryl did the most rational thing he could think of — he grabbed the empty mattress on the top bunk, slid it off the frame, and dropped it onto the floor next to her.
Y/N’s brow furrowed. “Oh, you don’t have to —”
“G’night,” Daryl interjected abruptly, avoiding her gaze as he quickly turned off the lantern and laid down. He crossed his arms tightly over his chest and squeezed his eyes shut, his face surely on fire.
The silence that followed was deafening.
Daryl peeked an eye open, certain she could hear his thrumming pulse from where she sat. But a moment later, the bed creaked as she settled back down against the rickety mattress.
He released the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding.
The archer wasn’t sure how much time passed before Y/N’s breathing evened out, the stranger from the woods all those days ago finally falling into a deep and restful sleep.
He, on the other hand, remained awake until morning came.
She’d asked him to stay and that was exactly what he was going to do.
Not even sleep could take him from her.
Everything changed after that night.
After the people from Woodbury moved into the prison, the demand for supplies nearly tripled. The archer found himself going on runs more often than not, hunting for game or scavenging local businesses — but the days and nights he was home were spent with her.
They fell into a routine of sorts. The days were spent working the fence or tending to things around the prison — but most nights, they’d sneak away from the others and spend hours sitting atop one of the unused watchtowers.
It became ‘their spot’, as Y/N had put it.
Some nights they sat quietly, existing in comfortable silence, watching the vast night sky. Other nights, Daryl would learn things about her — those were his favorite nights.
Y/N would talk about anything and everything — the mundane stuff, the deep stuff, the things in between — while Daryl would rest his head against the watchtower and close his eyes, listening to the way her voice rose and fell. She’d tell stories of her life before the end and her hopes for the future as though there still was one.
And over time, despite the world decaying at its very core, even Daryl started to believe that maybe, just maybe, there could be one.
She became his solace.
Hell, maybe she always had been, but he’d been too damn stupid to realize it.
“I’m sick of hearing myself talk,” Y/N suddenly spoke, a soft laugh following.
Daryl’s eyes snapped open as he glanced over at her, his brow furrowing.
She shifted from where she sat, the side of her face illuminated by moonlight. “Tell me something about you,” she said sweetly, her knee brushing against his as she rested one shoulder against the watchtower, giving him her full attention.
The archer felt his face warm under her curiosity. “Ya know plenty,” he grunted — and it was the truth. He’d told her more about himself than anyone else in his entire life.
“Oh, come on,” she countered and though Daryl couldn’t see it, he sensed an eye roll. “Just one thing? Something I don’t already know and then I’ll leave you alone.”
He huffed a breath. “Fine,” he grumbled, giving in.
Y/N waited patiently as the archer fell into thought, racking his brain for something to share — something even worth sharing. The silence that dredged on wasn’t helping either — if anything, it only added to the pressure. His life wasn’t all that interesting, never had been, never would be.
Daryl snuck a glance at Y/N — well, maybe that wasn’t entirely true.
“Uh,” he rumbled, scratching the back of his head. “I don’t know. Guess I always wanted a dog?” he mustered, the confession coming off more so a question than an actual statement.
Still, Y/N’s face broke out into one of her million-dollar smiles. “I can totally see you with a dog,” she beamed. “You never had one?”
Daryl almost shook his head, but then a faint memory came to mind. He looked away, propping his elbows against his knees and focusing straight ahead.
“When, uh —” he cleared his throat uncomfortably, picking absently at the skin beside his thumbnail. “When I was a kid, I was walkin’ home from school. Found this stray covered in mud, damn near skin an’ bones. An’ so I took it home,” he pressed his lips together before snorting a breath. “Even tied my shoelace ‘round its neck like a leash.”
“Aw,” Y/N sounded softly.
“Mhm,” the archer mumbled, the corner of his mouth quirking up.
After a stretch of silence lingered, she spoke up once more. “But you didn’t keep it?”
Daryl began picking at his skin a little more aggressively. “My old man — he was on a bender. Started screamin’ an’ hollerin’ when he saw me ‘cause he ‘didn’t wanna take care a’ no mangy mutt’,” he bit out, echoing his father’s words from all those years ago. “He threw somethin’ — don’t remember what. Maybe an empty whiskey bottle. Poor dog was scared outta its mind,” he murmured, shaking his head. “It pissed on the floor, right in front a’ him.”
Y/N’s expression turned troubled, her lips forming into a small frown.
Daryl ignored the tightness growing in his throat. “So he tossed the dog in his truck, drove off, an’ that was that — I never saw it again,” he finished, wincing as he ripped a small piece of skin off his thumb, drawing a drop of blood.
“What’d your dad do?” Y/N asked, her voice small.
The archer wiped the blood off onto his jeans. “Don’t know,” he shrugged, glancing over at her. “He never said an’ I never asked.”
She held his gaze for a long moment before letting out a soft sigh.
Daryl turned his head, staring out over the railing and into the darkened forest. He’d never told anyone that story — not even Merle, who’d been doing another stint in juvie at the time. The truth was, he carried a lot of guilt from that day. Sure, he was only a kid, but he was the one who’d brought the stray home in the first place.
Whatever happened to that dog…well, that was on him.
“Hey,” Y/N murmured, gently poking the side of his arm, drawing him back to her. “Maybe we’ll find you a dog of your own someday.”
Daryl quirked a brow, unconvinced.
“You never know,” she shrugged. “What would you name it?”
He scoffed softly in response, shaking his head.
“Come on,” she reached over and poked him once more. “Humor me.”
“How ‘bout this,” the archer relented. “If — an’ that’s a big-ass if — we ever find a dog someday, ya get ta' name it.”
Y/N’s face immediately lit up. “Me?”
“Mhm,” he nodded his head, feeling the corners of his lips twitch.
She exhaled a breath, her gaze widening. “This…this is a shit-ton of pressure, Dixon,” she whispered, the wheels in her mind, very obviously, turning.
Despite everything, a soft laugh rumbled from deep inside Daryl’s chest, the sound strange and unfamiliar. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d genuinely laughed — the noise got stuck in his throat, like his body was physically rejecting the sensation.
When he noticed Y/N watching him, a cheeky grin plastered across her face, his skin flushed.
“Okay, okay, let me think…” she grew serious, closing her eyes and resting her chin against her clasped hands. Not even a second later, her eyes shot open. “Got it!”
Daryl motioned for her to continue. “Lemme hear it.”
“Alright,” she shifted, facing him head-on. “Dog.”
The archer’s brow knitted together, his gaze narrowing. “Dog?”
“Dog,” she nodded resolutely.
“Ya — ya wanna name the dog ‘Dog’?” he questioned dubiously.
“Yup,” she grinned, popping the ‘p’.
Daryl rolled his eyes, fighting back a smirk. “Ya got a couple a’ screws loose, ya know that?” he teased, tapping the side of his head.
“Shut up,” Y/N laughed softly, nudging him with her elbow.
A beat of quiet passed between them before Daryl cleared his throat. “We ought'a head back,” he grumbled, starting to stand.
But then Y/N reached out, grabbing onto his hand. “Hang on,” she objected, looking up at him. “Just a few more minutes?” she asked, gently tugging his arm down.
The skin on his hand tingled beneath her touch as her gaze, warm like honey, melted further into his.
Before he could think twice, he found himself settling back down beside her, his hand still intertwined around hers.
Besides, when had he ever been able to say ‘no’ to her?
Daryl could’ve sworn those nights up in the watchtower were the best nights of his life.
Then the prison fell.
And destroyed everything good along with it.
“Do you miss her?”
Daryl’s eyes snapped open, just then noticing the quiet that’d settled over the funeral home. He glanced over at Beth, who remained seated in front of the piano, her kind gaze watching him curiously.
Settling further inside the casket he laid in, the archer turned to stare up at the ceiling, folding one arm behind his head, the other laid out across his stomach. He ignored Beth’s question — not because it wasn’t true, but because he knew if he spoke, if he started talking about her, the hollowness inside his chest would swallow him whole.
“I think she’s still out there,” Beth assured him quietly, steadfast in hanging onto whatever hope she could muster. “I think they all are.”
Daryl grunted softly in response, not trusting his voice.
He wanted to believe that — he wanted nothing more than to believe that Y/N and the others were out there somewhere, somewhere safe. But he wasn’t a foolish man — and he just couldn’t bring himself to feign the kind of certainty that came so effortlessly to Beth.
“‘And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith’,” she suddenly murmured, her eyes glowing against the candlelight, a bittersweet smile tugging at her lips. “Daddy used ta’ quote scripture — that was one of his favorites,” she explained, her voice growing thick at the mention of her father. She pulled herself together before continuing. “I have faith,” her words were resolute, as though not only trying to convince him but herself as well.
The archer huffed a breath, crossing his arms over his chest. “Got enough for the both a’ us?” he muttered dryly, quirking a brow.
Beth laughed, breaking the heaviness that’d spread. “Sure do,” she beamed before shooting him a meaningful look. “You can thank me later.”
With that, she swiveled around on the bench and faced the piano once more, her fingers dancing along the keys, filling the room with a gentle melody.
Daryl wasn’t a religious man — never had been, never would be.
He didn’t buy into all that bullshit. If there was a God out there…what the fuck was he doing? Where was he? Why didn’t he stop the world from ending? Why did he let the bad destroy the good, time and time again?
He just couldn’t put his faith into something so cruel, so merciless.
Daryl wasn’t a religious man.
But for the first time in his entire life, he closed his eyes and prayed.
The archer felt his throat constrict.
He tilted his head back, looking up at the darkened sky. The sun had melted into the Earth, in its place thousands upon thousands of littered stars, surrounding a glowing crescent-shaped moon.
Maybe he’d been wrong. Maybe there was a God out there — some higher power or greater being — who’d been listening that night in the funeral home.
Because somehow, someway, despite all the odds stacked against him…he’d found her.
Daryl felt his lip split beneath another vicious punch, his head snapping to the side.
He was losing strength, his bruised body slowly giving out on him as two of the Claimers continued to relentlessly beat him. It seemed like no matter how hard he fought back, he just couldn’t get the upper hand.
He was outnumbered and unarmed, but as long as their attention remained on him, he wouldn’t back down — because once they were done with him, they’d move on to the others.
They’d move on to her.
Daryl caught Y/N’s horrified gaze from the other side of the road — she was knelt in front of Tony, who had a fistful of her hair in his grip, simultaneously holding Michonne at gunpoint. Y/N was struggling against his hold, attempting to break free, her features twisted in pain.
A low growl rumbled from deep inside the archer, a red-hot rage coursing through his veins as he fought even harder against the two men.
He managed to dodge another punch, but in the process, connected with a swift jab to the ribcage. He exhaled sharply, losing his breath as the two closed in on him once more — though as the archer braced himself for the next strike, he noticed that the men had suddenly frozen in place.
Daryl followed their stares, finally understanding what had caused the abrupt standstill.
Rick was staggering away from the leader of the Claimers, red staining the bottom half of his face — the archer didn’t even realize it was blood until he saw Joe. The man swayed unsteadily on his feet, eyes wide, mouth agape, as his hands reached for where his throat should’ve been.
Taking advantage of the distraction, Michonne grabbed Tony’s gun and turned it on himself, shooting him once. Daryl followed suit, landing a solid hook against the side of Billy’s face. He heard another gunshot ring out but was too focused on the man at his feet to notice. Without any hesitation, the archer stomped the heel of his boot into the man’s skull, killing him instantly.
He backed away from Billy’s crushed form, stumbling over Harvey’s body, a bullet hole now between his lifeless eyes. He spun around, steadying himself against the hood of the car in front of him as he worked to control his heaving breaths. He’d turned just in time to see Rick mercilessly stabbing Dan, over and over again until the man’s center was nothing but a mess of blood and guts.
And then he saw her.
She was still on her knees, though now hunched over beside Tony, staring silently at his unmoving figure.
Daryl pushed away from the truck and rounded the hood, his heart leaping into his throat as he made a beeline towards her. His footsteps faltered the closer he neared, the sight before him suddenly registering — Tony had been shot through the neck by Michonne, but the front of his skull had also been caved in.
His gaze flickered towards Y/N, just then noticing the blood-soaked boulder clasped tightly in her hand.
It took every ounce of strength to not rush forward, to not pull her into his arms and hold her close because damn it, she was alive, she was okay, she was here.
The archer stepped over Tony’s body, slowly crouching down in front of Y/N — when his approach didn’t stir her, a jolt of unease shot through him. Her vacant eyes were trained on the dead man, her features expressionless and ashen. There was a cut just above her eyebrow, a small trail of blood trickling down the side of her face, but other than that, she appeared relatively unharmed.
Daryl gently took her hand in his and carefully unclasped her fingers from around the rock. He tossed the boulder aside before settling down, kneeling opposite her, his deep blue eyes maintaining a watchful look.
The archer brushed his thumb over the back of her limp hand, squeezing softly a moment later.
And then, almost hesitantly, she squeezed back.
Daryl held his breath as her eyes found his, welling with unshed tears, the helplessness in her haunted gaze twisting his insides. “I never killed someone before,” she whispered suddenly, choking on her words as though speaking shards of glass.
He wasn’t used to seeing her this way — she’d always been so steady, a light others were drawn towards, that he’d been drawn towards. And now…well, now he wished the Claimers would come alive so he could rip them apart all over again.
Unable to stand the sight of her broken expression any longer, Daryl reached for her. “C’mere,” he rasped, slipping his hand behind the back of her head and pulling her forward.
Y/N’s features crumpled as she fell against his chest, a hitched sob catching in her throat. She buried her face into the crook of his neck, gripping onto the front of his vest as though he was the only thing keeping her afloat.
He wrapped his other arm securely around her back, keeping her cradled against his body. “S’ alright,” the archer rumbled as she held on tighter to him, her frame trembling as she cried. “I got ya, Y/N, I got ya.”
Daryl wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, woven around one another, his pounding heart echoing hers.
But he didn’t mind — because he’d found her.
And nothing else seemed to matter much with her engulfed in his arms.
The weeks that’d followed nearly destroyed them all.
With unrelenting heat, dwindling supplies, and the hollowness of loss inside each of them, morale had been at an all-time low. The little amount of food they’d managed to scrounge up had been divvied into morsels — though not enough to soothe their aches of hunger. The water supply eventually depleted, leaving their throats raw and mouths like cotton as they walked — day after day, down winding road after winding road, searching for salvation that was nowhere to find.
The line that’d separated them from the dead had become alarmingly thin.
And it’d only been a matter of time before that line disappeared altogether.
Daryl roused from his sleep, somehow feeling even more exhausted than when he first closed his eyes.
He scrubbed at his face, wiping away the thin sheen of sweat that’d formed before huffing a breath. The sign of first morning light seeped through the canopy of trees above him, visible through the motionless overgrowth of leaves and greenery. The heat was already suffocating — his clothes stuck uncomfortably to his skin, his throat desperate for water he couldn’t afford to drink.
But focusing on that, focusing on the discomfort, was much easier than acknowledging the looming darkness that lingered.
The archer pushed up onto his elbows, the forest floor digging into his skin. He scanned the makeshift camp his group had set up, positioned just off the main road. Almost everyone was still asleep, curled up on the harsh wooded ground within the permitter they’d barricaded.
Except for Y/N who was nowhere to be seen.
Daryl felt his stomach lurch as he pulled himself off the ground and staggered to his feet, ignoring the wave of dizziness he felt — it’d been days since he’d eaten, since any of them had eaten. He grabbed his crossbow and slung it over his shoulder, tiptoeing around the others as to not wake them — they deserved a few more minutes in a reality that wasn’t as fucked as this one.
The only other person awake was Glenn, who’d volunteered to be on watch. He sat with his back against a large tree trunk, Maggie at his side, her head resting against his shoulder.
Daryl headed towards them, drawing Glenn’s attention. But before he could say anything, Glenn nodded his head towards something on the main road, careful not to jostle Maggie awake.
The archer followed his gaze, spotting Y/N through the trees. He nodded once in silent ‘thanks’, feeling the pit in his stomach loosen as he marched out of the woods and crossed over the asphalt.
Y/N was sitting on the hood of a long-since abandoned car, her feet perched atop the dented front bumper. Her eyes flashed towards him as he approached, prominent dark circles beneath a weary gaze, so unlike the warmth he was used to seeing.
Daryl felt his throat constrict — he could handle his own demons, the heaviness that’d latched onto his bones after the last few weeks.
But hers?
She needed to be okay — he needed her to be okay.
He slid onto the hood, the car dipping below his weight as he settled beside her. A comfortable silence stretched on as they stared down the long and desolate road ahead, each lost in their own thoughts.
“I miss ‘our spot’,” Y/N suddenly murmured, her tone wistful.
Daryl grunted softly in response, the nights they’d spent up in the watchtower flashing through his mind.
He missed it too — he hadn’t known peace like that before.
“God, we had it so good back then,” she exhaled a breath, lowering her head.
The archer peeked over at her, hearing the hint of emotion growing in her words, the sadness she tried to conceal. But she couldn’t hide it — not from him.
He could tell how she was feeling by the steadiness of her breath.
“We still had Hershel…” she whispered, clasping her hands together, her knuckles turning white. “Bob…Tyreese…” her voice cracked slightly before she glanced up. “Beth.”
It was Daryl’s turn to look away.
He couldn’t think about her — not without smelling moonshine and ash, not without feeling the weight of her lifeless body in his arms.
He never got to thank her.
When the prison fell, Daryl had been certain he’d never see Y/N again — that somehow, someway, she’d burned along with it. But Beth…she’d known — she’d known he’d find her again one day.
And he never got to thank her.
“I know you’re in pain,” Y/N’s voice broke through his guilt-ridden thoughts, drawing him back to her. “And I know how easy it is to just shove it down and push it away and pretend like it doesn’t exist,” she looked over at him then, her gaze steady and knowing — and despite the scrutiny, he couldn’t find it in himself to look away. “And I’m not asking you to talk about it. But please, just — just don’t pretend like it’s not there.”
Daryl gnawed on the inside of his cheek, his teeth breaking skin and filling his senses with the metallic taste of blood.
When Y/N reached towards him, he stiffened.
She slowly brushed away the hair that fell in front of his eyes, smoothing the strands back out of his face. “You’re not carved out of stone, Daryl,” she murmured gently before resting her palm against his flushed cheek.
The air suddenly thickened, the archer becoming painfully aware of how little space remained between them. There was a pull — almost magnetic — that urged him to lean closer, to draw nearer, to take her in his arms and shut out the rest of the world.
But before he could give into instinct, he pulled away and hopped off the hood of the car, landing on his feet with a huff.
Daryl looked anywhere but at her, ignoring the slight tremble in his fingertips. “M’ gonna —” he quickly cleared the thickness in his throat. “M’ gonna take a look ‘round — see what I can see.”
Y/N was quiet, though the archer didn’t dare look at her. “Okay,” she finally sounded — and even though Daryl couldn’t see her expression, he could hear the tangible defeat in her tone.
He clenched his jaw, kicking himself for being the source of her disappointment as he beelined towards the woods on the other side of the road, opposite the campsite.
But he’d only taken a couple of steps when he faltered, realizing then that he couldn’t just walk away — he’d never been able to just walk away.
Not from her.
“I hear ya,” he rasped, glancing back at her, the words tumbling from his mouth before he could stop them. “Ya know, what ya were sayin’ before an’ — an’ all that. I jus’ — I hear ya,” he mustered, the jumbled explanation all he could offer.
A tired smile tugged at Y/N’s lips. “I know,” she assured him softly.
Daryl held her gaze before nodding once, turning without another word, and disappearing into the trees.
A newfound determination coursed through the archer as he ventured further into the woods — there had to be something else out there, somewhere his people could call ‘home’. They couldn’t keep going on like this, fighting day-to-day just to survive — it couldn’t be them and the dead anymore.
There had to be something else, something more.
The world couldn’t be all bad.
Not the same world that’d given him her.
Daryl pulled his gaze away from the darkened sky.
His eyes trailed over the towering gates that surrounded Alexandria — sturdy iron sheets and impenetrable steel, the only thing keeping away the dead that roamed just outside them. He brushed his fingers over the ground, tugging at the overgrown blades of grass beneath where he sat as he fell back in thought.
Despite his initial doubt that Alexandria was all it promised to be, in time, the community had proven him wrong. Sure, there were fractures in its foundation, but it was better than nothing.
It was better than before.
And for the first time since the end of everything, there was hope for a future.
Smoke spilled past the archer’s lips, wafting in front of him before disappearing into the night air.
The streets of Alexandria were still — a welcomed change in comparison to life outside the walls. Daryl shifted on the porch steps, taking another drag from his cigarette as he rested his back against the railing. He tilted his head backward, blowing out a lungful of smoke, feeling his nerves calm in the process.
“Hey, stranger,” a voice suddenly called, breaking the quiet that’d stretched on.
Daryl knew that voice — knew it better than the back of his own damn hand.
He quickly shook away the hair that’d fallen in front of his eyes, watching as Y/N approached.
She looked different — her hair was washed, her clothes no longer blood-stained and tattered. The lines of worry that’d marred her features were smoothed away, replaced by a warm smile that only grew the closer she neared. It was strange — almost like getting a glimpse of her before the dead started walking.
Her footsteps slowed as she stopped in front of him, her head cocking slightly to the side. “What’s that look for?”
Daryl ducked his head down, his face feeling fuzzy — like a kid getting caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “Nothin’,” he shook his head, inhaling another drag from his cigarette before stubbing the flame out against the porch steps.
Y/N plopped down beside him, propping her back up against the railing opposite his. “So,” she started, turning her attention towards him. “Deanna was asking where you were tonight.”
The archer scoffed as he flicked the cigarette butt away. “Aaron’s,” he rasped, pulling one knee to his chest, resting his elbow on top of it.
Y/N appeared surprised at his response but didn’t push further. Instead, she exhaled heavily. “This place is like the fucking Twilight Zone.”
He huffed a breath, nodding in agreement. “Ya headin’ back over there?” he rumbled after a moment, jerking his head in the direction of the welcome party.
“Oh, no,” she quickly shook her head. “I’m sick of people,” she admitted before glancing over at him. “You don’t count.”
Daryl snorted a laugh, rolling his eyes despite the strange sort of pride her words brought him.
A beat of silence passed before Y/N spoke again. “Aaron seems like a good guy.”
The archer grunted softly in response, their conversation from earlier coming to mind. “He wants me ta’ start scoutin’ with him — findin’ other survivors, bringin’ ‘em back.”
Y/N’s eyebrows shot up. “Really?”
“Mhm,” Daryl sounded, nestling the side of his thumb between his teeth.
“Is that something you’d wanna do?” she asked, leaning forward a fraction.
He paused, taking a minute to consider her words. If he was being honest, he felt more comfortable outside Alexandria’s walls than inside — and having a good enough reason to be back on the road didn’t seem like such a bad thing. But if he was being really honest…
Daryl’s gaze met Y/N’s once more — he hadn’t been away from her since the prison fell.
That wasn’t exactly a time in his life he’d like to revisit.
“I do alright out there, I guess,” he shrugged a shoulder up, dropping his hand back into his lap.
A look of amusement flashed over her features in response. “That’s quite the understatement.”
The corner of his mouth quirked, but he couldn’t seem to ease the sudden worry gnawing at him. “Ya gonna be alright in here?” he rasped, steadying her with a serious look.
“Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that?” she countered smoothly — but Daryl could hear the hint of something in her tone, something he couldn’t quite place. When he remained silent, Y/N’s expression turned reflective. “I think it’ll be a good thing — you could help a lot of people out there who need it.”
The archer picked up on her deflection. “That ain’t what m’ askin’,” he retorted, calling her bluff.
Y/N looked as though she wanted to argue — but then her lips pressed together, forming a thin line. “I don’t know,” she finally said, avoiding his gaze. “I just — I don’t like being away from you, that’s all,” she admitted quietly, wringing her clasped hands together.
He stilled, never having been more grateful for nightfall — otherwise, she surely would’ve seen the sudden redness creeping over his cheeks.
“But, like I said,” she continued, exhaling a slightly awkward laugh. “It’ll be a good thing.”
He nodded once. “Mhm,” he sounded, not trusting his voice.
Her eyes softened before she began pulling herself up off the porch steps. “Well, I’m gonna get some sleep — see you in the morning?”
The archer cleared his throat. “I’ll see ya,” he rumbled.
A small smile tugged at Y/N’s lips as she headed up the steps, gently squeezing his shoulder as she passed.
He didn’t move a muscle, listening intently for the sound of the front door shutting before closing his eyes, ignoring the tingling sensation beneath where she’d touched him.
Daryl huffed a defeated breath. “Shit.”
Had he given into instinct that night, he would’ve told her the truth.
He would’ve told her that he felt the same way, that being away from her felt like losing half of himself, that nothing in his life had ever made sense until he met her. The words had toyed at the tip of his tongue, desperate to be heard after being swallowed time and time again — but he just hadn’t been able to do it.
He could almost hear Merle’s snide voice in the back of his head — taunting him, calling him ‘whipped’ and a ‘pussy’ and a ‘good-for-nothin’ redneck’, mocking him for even considering that someone like her could feel anything for someone like him.
So instead, he’d reverted back to what he knew best — shutting down and pushing away.
It wasn’t intentional, merely second nature after years and years of repetition.
But the wall he’d worked so hard to build stood no chance.
Not against her.
Daryl knew something was wrong the moment he crossed back through Alexandria’s gates.
And then the screaming started.
He took off into a sprint, his heart mimicking the echo of his footsteps pounding against the asphalt. He could hear Aaron and Morgan just behind, right on his heels, their heavy breathing mirroring his own as the sounds of anguish grew louder.
The archer felt his stomach drop the closer he neared, his mind repeating one, single phrase over and over again —
Just let her be okay.
When he and Aaron had gotten trapped in that car earlier, surrounded by walkers, he’d thought that was it for him. He was going to lead the dead away and give Aaron enough time to make it out, to make it back to Alexandria where he could continue doing what he did best — bringing salvation to those who needed it.
He’d made peace with his decision.
And as he’d grabbed the door handle, moments away from pushing into the raging swarm, he’d only been thinking one thing —
Just let her be okay.
For some reason, he’d been given a second chance and all he wanted was to see her again. It was nearly overwhelming, setting his nerves ablaze, sending his heart racing — it consumed him entirely, the thought of her.
He’d realized then what he should’ve known all along.
He’d never felt for anyone the way he felt for her.
Daryl finally found the others, all gathered in the center of town — but he barely had time to register what was happening when a single gunshot rang out.
Aaron and Morgan stood frozen beside him as they took in the scene — Rick had a gun in hand, the barrel pointed towards the ground, directly above Pete’s now-shattered skull. The crowd looked on in horror, huddled together near a dimly lit fire, eyes wide, mouths agape. Then he saw Reg — his throat sliced open, his body splayed out across Deanna’s lap, Michonne’s bloody katana lying beside him.
“Rick?” Morgan suddenly spoke, breaking the deafening silence that’d followed.
The sound drew Rick’s attention, his vacant eyes finding Morgan’s — but Daryl’s gaze drifted, meeting hers instead.
His stomach dropped when he saw her — she had one hand pressed against her cheek, blood trickling out from between her fingers, her face frozen in disbelief.
Daryl moved towards her, the rest of the world fading away.
Just let her be okay.
Y/N’s expression shifted as he neared, the apprehension that’d marred her features melting, turning into relief despite her ashen complexion and the chaos surrounding them. She absently shook her head back and forth, opening her mouth as if to say something, but no sound came out.
The archer came to a stop in front of her, his own voice lost somewhere deep inside his chest. So instead, he reached for her, very carefully, as though she’d been spun from glass. He wrapped his fingers around her wrist and gently pulled her hand away from her face, revealing a gash that stretched across the entirety of her cheek.
The swell of rage that coursed through him felt red-hot, flushing his skin as he stared at the wound, his eyes glinting dangerously by the light of the fire.
“She caught the nasty end of Petey-boy’s backswing,” came Abraham’s gruff voice.
Daryl hadn’t even realized the man approached — he was too busy thinking up new ways to bring Pete back to life, all so he could shoot the dead prick dead all over again.
Abraham crouched down a few inches beside him, taking a closer look at Y/N’s injury before whistling softly. “Ya must be ridin’ the gravy train with biscuit wheels, lil’ lady. That sack a’ shit damn near took your eye out,” he drawled before glancing over at Daryl. “Don’t think she needs stitches — unless someone wants ta’ reincarnate Dr. Dickwad for a second opinion.”
Y/N attempted to huff a laugh, but the motion had her wincing, her features twisting in pain.
And Daryl had seen enough.
He grunted a gruff ‘I got it’, giving Abraham a nod of appreciation before taking Y/N by the elbow and maneuvering her away from the others, back onto the street.
She allowed him to guide her elsewhere, neither saying a single word.
The two houses Deanna had provided to the group had been split amongst the lot of them. Daryl chose to reside in the finished basement — it was small and dingy, but he didn’t mind. The room had a couch and a bathroom and was much nicer than any other place he’d ever stayed at — even before the end of times.
And right now, it was serving as a makeshift infirmary.
Y/N sat perched on the edge of the couch, her knee bouncing anxiously as she watched Daryl barrel around the space like a rampant tornado. He grabbed whatever he could think of — the first aid kit stored beneath the bathroom sink, a bottle of water, a clean t-shirt to swap out for her blood-spattered one — before making his way back to her. He set the items down on the coffee table in front of the couch and took a seat on the edge of it, opposite her.
Still, neither spoke.
Daryl kept his eyes focused on the slash mark — that was much easier than acknowledging the absence of space between them. He unscrewed the cap to the water bottle, emptying a small amount onto a dry piece of gauze before leaning forward. Ever so slowly, he dabbed at the blood that’d dripped down her face and onto her neck, ignoring the near-palpable tension.
Y/N sat still as a statue, tilting her head back slightly as he wiped away the redness. But when he moved further up, nearing the wound, she flinched, hissing reflexively. Daryl snatched his hand back as if slapped, his eyes meeting hers, quietly apologetic.
She nodded for him to continue, taking a deep breath and balling her hands into fists atop her thighs.
The archer worked his jaw, lightening his touch.
He wasn’t sure how long they sat like that — all he knew was that when he was with her, nothing else really seemed to matter.
Luckily, the wound wasn’t as severe as it’d initially appeared — it was fairly shallow, faint towards the edges, and in time would heal completely. He wanted to tell her so, but the words wouldn’t formulate — the silence that’d stretched on felt untouchable.
So instead, Daryl focused on her hands, wiping away the blood that’d stained the grooves of her skin — and although she tried to conceal it, he could feel the slight tremble in her fingertips.
After he was done cleaning her hands, he sat back, his knee brushing against hers. He glanced up, flicking his hair away and studying the cut on her face — it’d stopped bleeding, though the edges were an angry-red, spiking his own temper once more. The collar of her shirt was soaked crimson, the color more muted in areas that’d already dried.
He hadn’t noticed the way their hands remained intertwined until Y/N squeezed softly, snapping him back to reality.
Daryl pulled his hand from hers and stood, grabbing the extra t-shirt off the table and dropping it into her lap. He scooped up the first aid kit before spinning around and stalking back towards the bathroom, giving her privacy as she began to change.
The archer avoided his reflection entirely, certain he’d see nothing but flushed skin and remorseful eyes. He squatted down, yanking open the drawer beneath the sink and tossing the kit inside. He gnashed his teeth together and grabbed onto the counter, his grip white-knuckled around the edge.
He needed to get a fucking hold of himself, that was for damn sure.
After regaining his composure, Daryl slammed the drawer shut with more force than necessary and pulled himself up in one swift motion.
But his entire body froze, his blood running ice-cold, when he noticed Y/N in the reflection of the bathroom mirror, standing in the doorway behind him.
Their eyes met through the glass before the archer twisted around, facing her head-on.
Her brow was furrowed as she stared at him, her head tilting to the side, the wheels in her mind visibly turning though her expression remained unreadable. She looked like she wanted to say something but didn’t quite know how to say it. She inhaled a breath, opening her mouth, but quickly snapped it shut — and then something different flickered across her features, an expression he hadn’t seen before.
Daryl waited for her to speak, to finally break the prolonged quietness that’d carried on.
But then she was suddenly crossing towards him.
He didn’t realize what was happening until Y/N’s lips crashed against his.
It was as though a dam had broken open — every fleeting feeling, every moment of suppressed longing coming to a head after dancing around one another for so long. At first, Daryl’s entire body went numb, his brain scrambling to figure out just what in the hell was actually happening. His breath caught in his throat as he stiffened instinctually, years of touch deprivation and self-consciousness clawing their way to the surface, leaving him paralyzed against her.
But when Y/N pulled back, breaking away from the kiss, he found himself craving her in the spaces she’d filled.
Her eyes were wide, boring into his, her gaze a mixture of shock and awe that he was certain mirrored his own — like even she couldn’t believe what she’d just done. She clung onto the collar of his shirt, the material balled in her fists.
Daryl’s chest heaved beneath her touch, his breathing syncing up with hers as they stared at one another, their noses only a few inches apart, each soaking the other in for what felt like the first time.
Something inside the archer fractured, right then and there. The wall he’d created inside his mind, the one designed to keep everyone at arm’s length, began to crumble. His guard fell to pieces, brick by brick, shattering at the very foundation he’d built it on.
And in its place…her.
Without any hesitation, Daryl slipped a hand behind Y/N’s neck and surged forward, closing the gap between them and bringing his lips to hers once more.
A soft gasp escaped her at first — one of surprise — the feel of it against his mouth sending a tingle down his spine before she returned the kiss with equal fervor. Her hands slid down his chest, snaking around his middle as she pressed herself against him with similar desperation.
He slid his hand up the back of her head, holding her in place as their lips parted, exploring each other with a deeper intensity. His fingers tangled throughout her hair, desperate to feel her in all of the ways he’d denied himself of, his other hand rising to gently cup the side of her face.
But when Y/N inhaled sharply, suddenly jerking back a fraction, Daryl’s eyes snapped open.
“Ow, fuck,” she hissed, her expression pinched.
“Shit,” the archer rasped, realizing then that his hand had brushed up against the cut on her cheek. “Ya alright?” he rumbled, pulling back further to get a better look.
Y/N let out a breathy laugh, her face lighting up in a way he’d never seen before. “Yeah,” she whispered hoarsely, her cheeks tinged pink, her lips red and slightly swollen.
Once again, Daryl found himself fighting to catch his breath.
He swallowed the thickness in his throat, carefully reaching forward and picking at a strand of hair that’d been swept out of place, tucking it behind her ear instead.
Y/N leaned into his palm, laying her hands against his chest, staring at him like she thought he’d hung the moon and painted the stars.
The look shifted into something deeper as she stepped back, ghosting her fingertips down each of his arms, his skin catching fire beneath her touch. She intertwined her hands around his calloused ones and began inching backward, slowly leading him out of the bathroom without another word.
The archer felt something stir deep inside him, a warmth settling in the pit of his stomach as she guided him towards the couch. He was entranced — like a man who’d been lost at sea for far too long, finally catching a glimpse of salvation from a lighthouse, beckoning him home.
And for the first time in a long time, he wasn’t afraid.
Daryl flushed at the memory.
She still had that same damn effect on him. It didn’t matter how much time passed, how many years went by, he’d never tire of her. She was, without a doubt, the best thing that ever happened to him.
He’d always felt out of place — even before the end. It was like everybody who’d ever lived was somehow born knowing the same song and dance — and yet there he’d been, stumbling along, fighting to catch up and fall in step with the rest of the world. It’d isolated him, made him feel weak and undeserving — like no matter how hard he tried, he’d never truly belong.
And now?
The only comfortable place his mind seemed to know was her.
Daryl fought back a wince, his entire body tensing up.
“Almost done,” Denise murmured as she continued stitching up the laceration on his back.
“Ya said that an hour ago,” the archer grumbled in response, grinding his teeth together.
“It definitely wasn’t an hour and you’re the one who refused the numbing cream, remember?” she countered evenly, her tone unwavering.
The archer merely huffed in response, fighting back a scowl as he gripped tightly onto the edge of the metal table he sat on top of. He ignored the feeling of Denise’s needle digging into his skin, closing up the knife wound he’d received back on the road, surveying the quieted house-turned-infirmary instead.
Rick was in the next room over, not having moved from Carl’s bedside since the survivors had taken Alexandria back from the dead. Glenn and Maggie were huddled together on the cot across the room while Michonne rocked Judith back and forth, exiting the infirmary with her a moment later. The others were gathered outside, recuperating after the long and harrowing fight that’d taken place mere hours ago.
And then there was Y/N — she sat on the floor beside his dangling legs, her head resting against the side of his knee, his vest laid out across her curled form. He could tell by her steady breathing and the way her head lolled every so often that she’d fallen asleep against him.
The entire community was running on little to no sleep, having fought through the night, taking on the herd that’d invaded their home — now, hundreds of bodies littered the streets, the wall that’d collapsed needed to be rebuilt, and those they’d lost during the attack needed to be buried.
Daryl glanced down when he heard a soft sigh, feeling his chest constrict as Y/N nestled closer.
She hadn’t strayed far since he’d returned and honestly, he wasn’t quite ready to be away from her either — especially after what happened on the road. Over the two days he was gone, he’d nearly lost his life on more than one occasion — and from what he'd heard, she’d nearly lost hers when the Wolves attacked.
But they were okay — she was okay — and that was what mattered.
Michonne reentered the infirmary a moment later, the exhaustion on her face mirroring his own. Judith, on the other hand, had fallen asleep in her arms, curled up against her chest, dark blonde wisps of hair sticking to her forehead.
“How’re you holding up?” Michonne asked softly as she approached the table, not wanting to wake Judith — or Y/N, for that matter.
“Jus’ a scratch, is all,” Daryl rumbled in response, peeking over his shoulder at Denise who remained focused on the wound.
Michonne nodded, rubbing small circles against Judith’s back. “I sent everyone home — Rosita and Heath are keeping watch where the wall came down. We’ll clear the dead once everyone gets some rest.”
“Alright,” Daryl rasped, a bone-deep tiredness beginning to seep in.
Before leaving, Michonne paused, looking down at Y/N’s sleeping form. When she glanced back up, her expression had shifted into something softer, something less tense. “She’s good for you,” she suddenly murmured, a small smile tugging at her lips. “You deserve that,” she whispered, reaching out and squeezing his hand, still latched around the edge of the table.
Daryl’s hand flexed beneath hers as he glanced down at the top of Y/N’s head — did he really deserve someone like her?
He’d spend the rest of his life wondering that.
Michonne patted the top of his hand before pulling away, disappearing into Carl’s room without another word, Judith still fast asleep against her.
“Alrighty,” Denise exhaled, drawing him back to the present. “You, my friend, are free to go.”
The archer grunted a gruff ‘thanks’ as she began cleaning up the supplies she’d used to stitch him up. He bit back a grimace as he pulled his shirt over his head, feeling the stitches stretch as he moved.
He reached forward then, gently ruffling the top of Y/N’s head, stirring her awake. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes before craning her neck and looking up, her bleary gaze meeting his. “All done?” she murmured, her voice slightly croaky.
“Mhm,” he sounded, sliding off the table and offering his hand to her.
The corner of her mouth quirked up as she grabbed it, allowing him to pull her to her feet. She swayed, fighting back a yawn, Daryl’s hand finding the small of her back and steadying her. Wordlessly, she held out his vest, which he slowly slipped back on, grinding his teeth together as a sharp jolt of pain shot across his shoulder.
Y/N’s brow furrowed as she watched him, her eyes narrowing — but before she could comment, Denise approached once more.
“Change the gauze in a couple of hours and take two of these for the pain,” she informed, holding out a small bundle of supplies, including fresh bandages and pills. “Doctor’s orders."
But Daryl waved her off. “Save ‘em,” he grumbled, carefully adjusting his vest.
He saw Y/N throw him a glance from the corner of his eye, though she didn’t protest — instead, she stepped forward and held her hand out.
Denise passed the supplies to her before lifting her glasses and rubbing one eye with the back of her hand, her fingertips stained red with blood. “Make sure he doesn’t do anything strenuous for a few days or he’ll tear the stitches,” she continued, speaking solely to Y/N as she set her glasses back in place.
Daryl huffed a breath. “M’ standin’ right here, ya know.”
Y/N nudged him in the ribcage, giving him a look that clearly translated to ‘be nice’.
Denise directed her attention back to the archer. “Don’t tear my stitches,” she reiterated emphatically before her expression eased. “Rest, relax, sleep — both of you.” She shot Y/N a pointed look before shooing them towards the front door, heading over to check in with Glenn and Maggie.
Y/N glanced over at Daryl once they were alone, her eyebrow quirking playfully. “I like this new side of Denise.”
The arched scoffed in response, flicking the hair from his face. “I liked it better when she was scared a’ me,” he grumbled as they fell in step, making their way out of the infirmary and back outside.
A laugh slipped past Y/N’s lips as they crossed over the porch. “Sounds about right,” she grinned, thoroughly amused.
“S’ true,” he shrugged his uninjured shoulder up as they made their way down the stairs and back onto the street.
“You know, you really aren’t that sc—”
Y/N stopped mid-sentence, her footsteps halting abruptly. Daryl faltered as well, glancing back at her, his brow knitting together. Before he could ask what was wrong, he realized what she was looking at.
In the light of day, the aftermath of the attack was startling. There were more bodies than he could count, rotted and decaying, bones torn through skin, blood spilling out onto the street, stark against the asphalt. The carnage was overwhelming, the reality of what they’d accomplished, as well as what they’d almost lost, suddenly settling in.
“We’ll fix this place up — make sure nothin’ like this ever happens again,” Daryl rasped, not entirely certain if he was trying to reassure her or himself.
Y/N’s expression turned solemn. “It’s not the dead I worry about,” she fixed him with a stare, her gaze flickering towards the wound on his back before she continued surveying the damage done to their community.
There wasn’t anything he could say that would make her feel better — not in a world as dark and void and meaningless as the one they lived in.
The only thing he could do was just be there.
Daryl reached for her, slipping his hand around hers and squeezing softly, drawing her back to him.
Although Y/N kept her eyes forward, he felt the tension leave her.
And then she squeezed back.
The archer huffed a breath, nestling the side of his thumb between his teeth.
Well, maybe the world wasn’t entirely meaningless.
Daryl stood still beneath the shower head, warm water washing over his body.
But he couldn’t focus on that — all he could focus on was Y/N, standing behind him, her arms wrapped around his middle, her bare chest pressed against his back. He closed his eyes, committing the feeling to memory — her heart steadily pounding against him, her cheek resting against his shoulder as water continued to cascade down their bodies.
She pulled back slightly, gently pressing her lips against one of the scars on his back.
Daryl felt a chill run down his spine despite the steam around him, fighting back the instinctual urge to stiffen — and as she moved to the next scar and the next, softly kissing each one, he couldn’t help but melt beneath her touch.
He turned then, feeling the tips of his ear redden at the sight of her before he quickly averted his gaze.
Y/N laughed, soft and sweet, reaching towards him and brushing the hair from his face.
Daryl caught her hand with his own, pressing her palm flat against the curve of his jaw. The cut on her cheek had healed, leaving only a faint, thin line below her eye. His own knife wound was still fresh, but in time, would heal as well.
He brought his hand up and gently brushed his thumb across the length of the mark before tilting her head back, bringing his lips to hers.
He wasn’t sure where the sudden boldness came from — still, Y/N returned the kiss, her arms snaking around his neck, his around her waist.
It wasn’t until the water began to run cold that Daryl, begrudgingly, turned the shower off.
They moved about in comfortable silence — drying off, changing into clean clothes, completing eerily normal and mundane tasks that had the archer wondering if he’d somehow transported into an alternate reality without realizing it.
But the blood and muck that’d washed off their bodies and collected at the bottom of the tub reminded him otherwise.
It’d taken three whole days to clear Alexandria of all the walkers that’d infiltrated their walls. Now, they could start rebuilding, reinforcing, doing whatever they needed to do to make sure an attack like that never happened again.
Daryl climbed into the bed he shared with Y/N, having moved up from the basement and into her room after that first night they’d spent together. He winced as he rotated his shoulder — despite Denise’s instructions to limit arduous activity, he’d worked the past three days from sun up to sun down in removing all the bodies from within the gates.
Y/N had tried to get him to take it easy, but he hadn’t — that just wasn’t in his nature.
She crawled into bed after him, sighing softly as she settled by his side, sitting with her legs crossed beneath her. She held her hand out towards him and in her palm, two pills — he recognized them as the ones Denise had given her.
Daryl huffed a breath.
“Don’t make me say ‘please’,” she warned, raising her brow expectantly.
The archer fought back the urge to roll his eyes but took the pills anyway, popping them into his mouth and washing them down with the bottle of water he’d left by the bedside. Y/N shot him a cheeky grin as she laid down, curling onto her side, facing away from him.
He reached over, wrapping an arm around her middle and dragging her towards him, eliciting a surprised laugh from her. She nestled closer, her back pressed against his chest, one hand clasped around his forearm, drawing absent circles against his skin with her thumb.
Daryl felt himself fading, slipping into unconsciousness after a long, tiring day of survival.
But just before the world darkened entirely, a whisper broke through the quiet.
“I love you.”
The archer’s eyes snapped open. Part of him wondered if Y/N was sleep-talking. An even bigger part of him figured he’d imagined it because there was no way — no way in hell — she could’ve consciously and deliberately said that to him.
But then she was shifting, rolling onto her back and looking up at him.
He searched her gaze for something, anything — a punchline, an explanation, a ‘hah, fooled ya!’ — that would explain what in the fuck he’d just heard.
Except that didn’t happen.
Instead, Y/N slowly nodded, like she was finally coming to terms with her own blatantly impromptu confession. “Yeah, I-I do — I —” she fumbled slightly in her admittance before steadying. “I love you,” she murmured, blinking up at him.
Daryl swallowed the lump in his throat, his mind screaming at him to say something instead of just staring at her like he’d seen a ghost. He could feel the words toying at the tip of his tongue — he wanted to say it, he did, because…well, of course. Of course, he wanted to. But it was like his body was physically rejecting a response.
Y/N patiently watched him struggle, giving him a second to get his shit together, a small, knowing smile playing at her lips.
The archer pushed up onto his elbow, clearing his throat, his cheeks burning red. “I, uh,” he grumbled, shaking his head slightly. “Y-Yeah, I —” he faltered, clearly struggling. But when his baffled gaze met her kind one, almost instantly, his wall of insecurity diminished. “Yeah,” the single word came out resolute and sure, everything he needed her to hear.
Y/N’s smile grew, stretching across her face, bright enough to light the sky on fire. “Yeah?” she asked softly, reading between the lines.
Daryl nodded once. “Yeah,” he rasped thickly, like it was the most obvious thing in the world — because it was.
He’d felt that way since the day he met her, even if he hadn’t known it.
She reached up, twisting her fingers in his hair and bringing his face down to meet hers, pressing a gentle kiss against his lips.
Then she was curling onto her other side so they laid chest to chest, her head tucked beneath his chin as she snuggled closer, his arms wrapping around her instinctually.
Daryl wasn’t sure how long they laid like that, limbs weaved around one another like coiled rope. But when her breathing evened out, he pulled back and snuck a glance, tracing every inch of her face as though the first time and the last. He brought his hand to her face, carefully brushing back the hair that’d swept over her features before leaning in and pressing a kiss against her forehead.
Then sleep came for him as well.
Daryl dropped his hand back into his lap, drawing his legs to his chest.
Being with Y/N was effortless — as easy as breathing. It came, somewhat alarmingly, natural to him. He’d never pictured himself with anyone ever. Before the end, before her, he’d been content to sit on the sidelines and watch all the relationships around him undoubtedly burn — it was all he’d ever known, it was all he’d ever seen.
But then she came along and flipped his entire world upside down.
A love that came without warning.
“Let’s get this shit loaded up — looks like it’s gonna rain soon,” Daryl rumbled, peering up at the darkening sky, noticing a cluster of bulbous clouds rolling in.
Y/N tilted her head back, following his gaze before humming a breath. “I don’t know — the wind’s blowing East. It might just miss us,” she remarked, catching the archer’s eye, a mischievous look flashing across her features. “Wanna make a bet?”
Daryl scoffed a breath in response, shutting the car trunk filled with scavenged supplies and adjusting the strap of the rifle slung across his chest — he was still getting used to the weapon. It felt unfamiliar in comparison to the weight of his crossbow. The reminder of his stolen weapon sent a flush of anger through his veins. He’d find those assholes someday and get it back, that was for damn sure.
“Come on,” Y/N grinned, drawing him back as she hefted another box over to him, dropping it onto the ground with a huff. “How about this? If it rains…I’ll take your watch shift tonight with Elizabeth.”
The archer quirked a brow, suddenly intrigued. Elizabeth was one of the original members of Alexandria — and she was…chatty. “Fine,” he nodded, opening the car door and lobbing the box she’d brought over onto the backseat. “She’s always yappin’ ‘bout books an’ shit I don’t know nothin’ ‘bout. Damn irritatin’ sometimes,” he grumbled.
Y/N laughed at his aggravation, turning to pick up another box. “I like her,” she shrugged, making her way towards him.
Daryl huffed a breath, waving her off. “Alright an’ if it doesn’t rain? What’d ya want?” he questioned, taking the box from her hands and sliding it into the car.
Before she had the chance to respond, Rick suddenly appeared, pushing through the front doors of the high school they’d been scavenging — it’d been turned into a FEMA evacuation center right at the beginning of the end. It’d somehow, miraculously, been left untouched — the doors and windows had been barred and chained, but luckily they’d had the tools needed to break in.
It’d been a little over a month since Alexandria had been overrun with the dead — the wall had been rebuilt and fortified, but the survivors had been hesitant to venture outside the gates after what happened the last time. Regardless, supplies were dwindling and a run had to be made.
“How’s it comin’ along out here?” Rick called as he jogged down the front steps and into the parking lot.
“Filled up the trunk pretty good — gonna need another car or two jus’ ta’ fit the rest a’ this shit,” Daryl remarked as the sheriff approached, motioning to the rest of the unpacked boxes lying around.
Rick came to a stop in front of them, one hand resting on top of the handle of his pistol strapped around his waist. “This is good — this is real good,” a rare smile spread across his face, so unlike the usual tension in his features.
“Tara’s finishing up around back — she’s grabbing the rest of the stuff from the greenhouse,” Y/N relayed to Rick, sharing a hopeful look with the archer. “We’ve got enough stuff to last us, I don’t know, at least another couple of months — that’ll be enough time to get some crops growing, maybe even a garden or two.”
Rick huffed a laugh in disbelief, shaking his head. “Who would’a thought,” he mused to himself before taking a breath. “Alright, I’m gonna grab a few last things inside an’ then we’ll lock up — come back tomorrow with a couple a’ cars an’ clean this place out.”
The sheriff left without another word, leaving Daryl and Y/N alone once again.
He began rearranging the boxes in the backseat, making sure there was enough room for two people to sit there on the way back home.
“A date,” Y/N suddenly spoke, catching him off guard.
Daryl straightened, turning back around to look at her, his brow knitting together. “Huh?”
The corner of Y/N’s mouth quirked up as she took a step towards him. “If I win, if it doesn’t rain today…I want you to take me on a date.”
The archer tilted his head to the side, trying to distinguish if she was joking or not. “Ya serious?”
“Yeah,” Y/N nodded, a sort of awkward laugh slipping past her lips. “I know it’s stupid — and given the way you’re looking at me right now, I know you’re thinking the same thing,” she laughed again as he quickly erased the skepticism from his expression. “But that’s —” she shrugged a shoulder up, “— that’s what I want.”
Daryl scratched the side of his head, flicking the hair from his face as he studied her, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned back against the car. “That really what ya want?”
“Mhm,” she sounded. “And it doesn’t have to be anything special — just us and, I don’t know…maybe Aaron can whip up some of his famous spaghetti,” a soft smile grew on her face as she looked at him. “I, uh — I just — I want to do this right, you know?” her expression turned earnest. “I want those moments with you, Daryl.”
The archer felt a swell of warmth spread throughout him as he looked at her, feeling his resolve give way. “Alright,” he managed to rasp, his throat tight with emotion.
“Alright,” Y/N reiterated with a nod, sticking her hand out, a playful look in her eye.
Daryl snorted a laugh as he reached out and grasped her hand with his own, shaking once to seal the deal.
Y/N shot him a cheeky grin as she pulled from his grip. “We should —”
“Guys?” Tara’s voice suddenly sounded, drawing their attention.
Daryl knew as he pushed off the car, as he turned around that something was very wrong — he could hear it in her tone.
It took a moment for him to fully register the scene before him — a wide-eyed Tara just a few feet away, standing straight as an arrow, holding her hands up near her head.
Then he spotted a man.
The stranger stood just behind Tara, one arm wrapped around her neck, the other holding a gun, the barrel pressed against her temple. He was young, maybe early twenties, though it was hard to tell with all of the blood coating his skin. He peered over Tara’s shoulder, his frantic gaze bouncing wildly back and forth between the archer and Y/N.
Daryl’s protective instinct kicked in as he took a step forward, drawing the man’s attention, keeping Y/N out of his line of fire. His hand automatically reached for the rifle strapped around him but his movements stilled when the man’s eyes widened, his arm tightening around Tara’s neck.
“Hey, take it easy,” Daryl held out his hands in front of him.
“Move,” the man growled, jerking his head to the side. “Away from the car.”
Daryl felt Y/N grab a fistful of material from his shirt, slowly pulling him back as the man moved towards them, keeping Tara in front of him to conceal his body.
A tense standoff of sorts stretched on as they maneuvered around, the man never taking his eyes off of Daryl. When the stranger made it to the driver’s side of the car, he unwound his arm from around Tara’s neck, using it to open the door instead — though his finger remained twitching above the trigger. Once the door was opened, he faltered, realizing he’d lose the coverage of Tara’s body if he tried to get inside.
“Take it,” Y/N suddenly spoke, stepping out from behind Daryl with her hands near her head, drawing the man’s attention.
The archer shot her a sharp glance. “Y/N —”
“Take the car, take the supplies, take whatever you need,” she continued calmly, ignoring Daryl’s growled protest. “Just let her go, okay? No one’s here to hurt you.”
The stranger’s expression shifted, the animalistic look on his face shifting into something that resembled more of a quiet desperation than anything else. “I —“ he shook his head quickly, shifting back and forth. “I just need — I just need to go — I need to go.”
Y/N took another step forward, the side of her arm brushing against Daryl’s. “Okay,” she nodded, exhaling a breath. “That’s okay — just let our friend go and —”
Her sentence was interrupted by the front door of the school swinging open.
Daryl whipped his head around, feeling his stomach drop when he spotted Rick walking out with a stack of boxes — but when the sheriff noticed the standoff happening just down the steps, the boxes came crashing down, falling out of his hands, and instead…he grabbed his pistol.
It was as though everything happened in slow motion.
The stranger’s expression twisted as his sights set in on Rick — he swung the barrel of his gun away from Tara, who instantly dropped to the ground as the man pointed the weapon up the steps, and then…
A barrage of gunfire sounded as Rick and the man began shooting at one another in rapid succession. The sheriff used the front door as a shield, attempting to fire from around the frame, the awkward angle throwing off his aim. The stranger, on the other hand, fired away in no particular direction — his aim was erratic and panicked as he tried using the car door as coverage.
When a bullet flew past the side of Daryl’s head, he dove towards Y/N. He knocked her off her feet and onto the pavement, attempting to take cover from the shootout. The archer flipped onto his back, fumbling for his rifle before finally getting a grip and pointing it at the man.
But before he could take a shot, the stranger threw himself into the car, slamming the door shut, bullets from Rick’s pistol embedding into the metal. He peeled recklessly out of the parking lot, still firing from out of the opened window as he made his getaway.
Despite one of the back tires exploding after getting hit with a stray bullet, the stranger kept driving, disappearing onto the main road and out of sight, leaving a wake of destruction in his path.
“What the fuck?” Tara called from where she’d taken cover.
“Is everybody alright?” Rick yelled back, coming out from behind the door and running down the steps.
Daryl twisted onto his side, looking over at Y/N. “Hey, ya alright?”
“Y-Yeah,” she murmured shakily, pushing up onto her hands and knees. “I’m okay.”
The archer let out a sigh of relief, climbing to his feet and surveying the damage done around them as Rick appeared at his side.
“What an asshole,” Tara swore, coming to a stand as her eyes bounced between Rick, Daryl, and Y/N. “Seriously, what kind of —”
Daryl looked over at her, waiting to hear the rest — but that was when he noticed her staring at something just behind him, the horrified expression on her face filling him with a vast and all-consuming sense of dread.
The archer spun around.
And that was when he saw her.
Y/N stood a few feet away, swaying unsteadily, her hand pressed tightly against the center of her stomach. Her head was lowered, bowed to her chest as she slowly pulled her trembling hand away, revealing a stark redness pooling from her midsection, staining the front of her shirt. She looked up then, her eyes meeting his, the shock in her gaze surely mirroring his own.
“No,” Daryl whispered, the word sounding strangled in his throat as Y/N’s knees suddenly began to give out. “No!” he roared, rushing forward and grabbing onto her before she could collapse.
His arms slipped around her middle before he carefully lowered her onto the ground, her head drooping down against his shoulder. His heart pounded so violently against his ribcage, part of him wondered if it was giving out on him entirely — maybe it was. Maybe this was what dying felt like. Maybe this was what it felt like to have your soul ripped straight out of your body.
Daryl cradled the back of Y/N’s head with one hand as he laid her down flat against the pavement, her eyes wide and unseeing, staring straight up at the sky. “Hey, hey, look a’ me, jus’ look a’ me,” he urged, brushing the hair back from her face, ignoring the blood now staining his hands — her blood.
“I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay,” she mumbled, repeating it over and over again as though she could will it to be true — though her skin grew more ashen with each minute that slipped by.
Rick suddenly kneeled on the opposite side of Y/N, taking a piece of cloth and holding it against the wound. “Keep pressure on it,” he instructed Daryl and although he tried to conceal it, the archer could hear the way his voice wavered. “You jus’ hold on, Y/N, understand? We’re gonna get you outta here,” he promised, reaching down and squeezing one of her hands before disappearing.
Daryl watched him leave, dragging a teary-eyed, slack-jawed Tara along with him as they began frantically searching the abandoned parking lot for any working vehicles — it was their only chance at getting her back to Alexandria.
And if they didn’t…
No.
No, he couldn’t go there.
Instead, he pressed the cloth against the gunshot wound, attempting to stall the blood flow, the pressure eliciting a pained whimper from Y/N that almost made the contents of his stomach reappear. “I got ya, Y/N, I got ya,” he rasped, grabbing her limp hand with his own and intertwining their fingers, holding his other hand firmly against her stomach.
His words seemed to bring her back to him, her hollow gaze shifting into one of panic — like she only just realized what was happening. Her features crumpled, a flash of fear skirting across her face as the shock began to wear off. “Am — am I dying?” she managed to choke out, her eyes filling with unshed tears as she looked up at him.
“No,” he shook his head resolutely, feeling moisture build in the corners of his own eyes. “No, ya ain’t goin’ nowhere, ya hear me?” his grip tightened around her hand — like his touch alone could keep her there with him. “We’re gonna get ya back ta’ Alexandria an’ — an’ get ya patched up, good as new, alright? Ya jus’ gotta hang on for me, girl.”
Y/N’s bottom lip quivered as a tear snaked down the side of her face. “I-I don’t want to leave you,” she whispered, a sob hitching in her throat.
“Hey, it’s gonna — ya gonna — jus’ — Rick!” Daryl suddenly bellowed, sitting back on his haunches and desperately scanning the area for any sign of him or Tara. He spotted them at the opposite end of the parking lot, running from car to car, searching for keys or at least a way to jumpstart one of the abandoned vehicles.
But luck was not seeming to be on their side.
Daryl let out a vicious string of curses before focusing back on Y/N. He’d never felt so helpless in his entire life — and God, if he could, he’d take her place in a second.
She was fading — fading so rapidly it made him dizzy. Her skin was cold to the touch, her lips tinged a disturbing shade of blue, her eyes lacking the warmth he was so used to seeing. He felt a swell of emotion rise in his throat, threatening to consume him, but he shoved it down.
“Hey, y-you were right,” she murmured weakly, the corner of her mouth twitching up as she tilted her head to look up at the sky once more. “I think it’s gonna rain.”
Daryl felt a tear spill down his cheek as he followed her eye line, the previously blue sky now blanketed with thick, dark clouds. He huffed a humorless laugh, their conversation from a few minutes earlier ringing through his mind, somehow seeming like an entire lifetime ago. “Guess that means ya — ya gotta take watch tonight, right?” he rasped despondently, keeping his gaze towards the sky.
He stilled when he was met with nothing but a deafening silence.
He felt his stomach roll as he squeezed his eyes shut, afraid of what he'd see if he looked down. “Y/N?” he whispered, his voice hoarse.
When she didn’t respond, Daryl knew.
She was gone.
His girl was gone.
And his entire world came crashing down around him.
Daryl forced his eyes open.
His body went numb at the sight of her, his mind refusing to accept the image before him — empty eyes, grey flesh, blood trickling from the corner of her mouth. Her hand slipped from his grasp then, dropping onto the pavement beside her unmoving form as she continued staring vacantly up at the sky.
His brain couldn’t process what was happening — where he was, what he was doing, why he was there. It felt like a nightmare — a reality that wasn’t quite reality, warped and desolate and consuming him whole. The only tangible thing he felt was a sharp, physical pain in the center of his chest, his breaths short and hitched, causing black spots to dance in his vision.
Over the blood rushing to his ears, he could just barely make out the sound of a car engine, the noise muted and dull as it approached…
But it was too late.
They were too late.
Daryl reached for her hesitantly, hands trembling as he wound his arms beneath her back and carefully scooped her up off the ground, falling back slightly as he pulled her body across his lap. When her head lolled listlessly to the side, he brought his hand up, brushing his bloodstained fingers through her hair before cradling the back of her head, pressing his cheek against hers.
“Ya said —” he squeezed his eyes shut, rocking back and forth as his grip around her lifeless body tightened. “Ya said ya were okay,” he choked out brokenly, his own shock slowly wearing off as something deep inside his soul fractured.
Then he broke.
And the sky opened up and wept alongside him.
The sound of barking drew Daryl back to reality.
He glanced over his shoulder, quickly blinking away the tears that’d formed, spotting Dog trotting towards him. The German Shepard’s tongue hung lazily out of his mouth, his easy pace picking up the closer he neared, letting out another short bark.
Daryl rumbled a laugh as Dog came to a halt at his side, plopping down next to him. “Hey, boy,” he rasped softly, scratching behind his dog’s ear and earning a sloppy lick in return He wiped away the moisture from his cheek as the canine laid down beside him with a huff. “Good, Dog.”
The archer ran his fingers through his sleek fur, feeling his throat tighten. When he’d found the German Shepard a few years back, he’d remembered the conversation with Y/N from back at the prison — and it’d only felt right to name him ‘Dog’.
It’s what she would’ve wanted — and somehow, it made him feel just a little bit closer to her.
“Man, she would’a loved ya,” he whispered thickly, sighing a long and heavy breath.
Daryl looked forward once more, studying the small gravestone in front of him — her gravestone.
For a long time, he stayed away. He hadn't been able to go near where she'd been laid to rest, he just couldn’t — it was too fucking painful, like part of himself had been buried right along with her. But over time, the grief became easier to manage — it never went away, it'd never go away — but he found a way to exist alongside it.
Now, he found a strange sort of peace here.
It’d been years since he’d lost her — she’d been gone for longer than he’d known her. It was hard to keep track of time these days, they seemed to come and go without rhyme or reason. So much had happened since that day — the war against the Saviors, the looming threat of the Whisperers, losing friends, family, Rick…
Time seemed to move differently after losing the people loved most.
After that day at the high school, Daryl had tried to find the man responsible for what happened to Y/N — he’d gone back to the high school, wild and unhinged in his grief, hellbent on retracing their steps and tracking down the stranger. He’d needed revenge, bloodshed, he’d needed the man to know what he’d done, who he’d taken from the world.
Despite the improbability, the archer had no trouble finding him.
The back tire that had been blown out during the exchange of gunfire had sent the car careening down an embankment and into a large tree less than a mile from the school. One of the branches had broken through the windshield and punctured the man’s chest, most likely killing him on impact.
He’d reanimated still strapped in the driver’s seat.
Daryl left him that way.
It wasn’t the ending he’d hoped for, but maybe it was the ending he deserved.
He reached down, absently stroking the top of Dog’s head, and inhaled a deep breath.
Not a single day went by without the thought of her.
She came and went — like a flash of light or the beat of a heart. Daryl had barely had any time to hold onto her before she was gone — and he would’ve held her so much tighter had he known it’d be the last chance he’d have.
Some people were just too bright to stay, too good for what the world had become — at least that’s what he told himself on the really dark days.
The archer closed his eyes, imagining her at his side — sometimes if he sat like that for long enough, he could almost hear her voice, her laugh, he could almost feel her warmth, her touch — and it was like she was still there, sitting right beside him.
It wasn’t the same, but it was enough — at least until he could be with her once more.
Daryl opened his eyes, peering up at the vast night sky, and released the breath he’d been holding.
Someday, he’d find his way home again.
Fin.
A/N: ...hi...how y'all doin'? lol
So yeah, this is a lot to unpack. If you've made it to the very end, THANK YOU! I know this was a super-dee-duper-long oneshot but hopefully (heartbreak and all) it was worth it.
Most of this story was purely self-indulgent - I mean, come on, who doesn't want this kind of love? But aside from that, I also wanted to write a relationship for Daryl that felt authentic and true to his character (*cough cough* definitely not throwing shade at 10.18...nope...not at all...lol)
What also made this story super fun was the fact that I was able to incorporate other characters from over the course of the series! (Even though he's only in it for .2 seconds, Abraham is probably my personal favorite lol I'd never written for him before, and damn, is it fun!)
I also like the little 'twist' at the end when we realize that in the present parts of the story, he's been hanging out at the reader's grave the entire time, reminiscing. Ow, that hurts my heart.
After writing this for months, I was the last person who wanted to see the story end like this. I honestly grew super attached to this relationship and part of me contemplated ending it on more of a 'happy' note...or as 'happy' as you can get with a show like this one. But this was the ending I'd envisioned from the beginning. We got to experience a Daryl x Reader relationship from the very start to the very end. No open-ended questions, no 'what ifs'.
And I think that's sorta beautiful.
P.S. Feedback is incredibly important. I write for my own happiness, but I also write for YOU. So don’t be afraid to shoot me an ask or leave a comment with your thoughts! It truly motivates me and helps move along the writing process. Also, please consider donating to my Tip Jar. Every little bit helps!
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elephart-hi · 3 years
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Worthy of a Queen | Jurdan Canon Compliant AU
AU: Jude decided to take Cardan in small doses during The Wicked King. Lovers AU
Summary: Jude was a fool for try to best Cardan here. She may be a cunning spy and a swords master but the bedroom and lovemaking was his domain.
~~~
“Shall we continue?” he asked in a voice of innocence that certainly seemed akin to lying with how far innocence was from his intentions.
~~
Jude had underestimated Cardan. She got her prize, she had won the battle, but he was going to win the war. With that miserable thought in mind and her pride boiling with anger she spat out her response, “fuck you.”
Cardan’s chuckle was dark and dangerous as he said, “with pleasure.”
Rating: M is for mature and mad filthy (but ends sweetly) (I try to trick ya in the beginning bare with it)
AN: This is my first ever fic!!!! And of course, it's Jurdan and of course, it's smut. No one is surprised. Shout out to Amber and Hannah for being my beta readers and convincing me to post this. And shout out to @slightlyrebelliouswriter23 who's beautiful writing made me go fuck it and sit down and write something myself which I've always wanted to do, so thank you keep being wonderful.
Please let me know what y'all think! I have ideas for a whole fic for this so if you want that tell me.
Inspired by these sketches and this
set during the Wicked King
warnings: hair pulling, spanking, and light bondage
AO3
As she lay sprawled out on her hands and knees, dirty, sweaty, and out of breath, it was clear to Jude Duerte that pride was her hamartia. She could have everything that she needed if she would only concede but stubbornly she refused to. Her pride wouldn't allow it, no matter how desperate she was.
Instead of the glory, she assumed she would achieve that night she lay there pathetically at his mercy. Something she deeply detested. She detested it almost as much as the smirk she could practically hear on his full lips as an infuriatingly cocky laugh rumbled out from deep in his throat. A laugh that had her toes curling and her seeing red and seething. Just as most things that came from his lips did.
Jude gritted her teeth together as she futilely attempted once more to get him to relent but the ironclad grip on her hair did not loosen and she was met with another rumble of laughter followed by a resonating smack of skin against skin. Her cheek stung from the impact and the slap made her burn red hot. The blow would surely bruise.
She hated him for this. Absolutely loathed him for it. She could easily beat him in a fight, have him on his back with a knife to his throat in less than ten seconds if she wanted. He knew that as much as she did. He probably relished in the knowledge of it, of having her here like this when she could easily best him. But she couldn’t now. Not if she wanted what she came for. Tonight her only option of getting what she needed would be to play nice. Something she was not fond of nor good at. Something that she absolutely did not want to do. Jude wanted nothing more than to make him see red as she did at that moment.
In her anger and frustration, Jude let his name snarled from her lips, “Enough of your stupid games Cardan” she nearly spat the last syllable out.
She was met with another slap, its impact sent her reeling with a groan slipping from her mouth. She hated to give away that his blow affected her at all; that groan was a loss for her. He hummed at the sound she made. Satisfied that her patience was running thin. Happy that he was getting to her. He knew he was winning. He gripped her hair tighter, tugging her head back and her lips pulled into a sneer. She could hear that fucking smirk again as he murmured into her ear with the buttery voice of a lover, “What games do you speak of my darling Jude?”
She struggled again but to no avail. The ‘my darling’ getting to her just like he knew it would. Oh, it made her burn. “You know what I’m speaking of!”
All that he smugly replied with was “Do I?” a small quip from his devastating lips.
She knew he was toying with her. Responding with questions to avoid having to speak in truths. A common trick of the fae used to deceive those around them. But Jude was having none of it.
“Give me what I want, Cardan!” it was a vicious snarl from her lips. He stilled completely at it and she knew it had been a mistake to let her temper fly. She knew he would only give her what she craved if she played by his rules and losing this prize was not an option for her. She couldn’t afford it. Jude was absolutely desperate.
He leaned in close to her ear once more and in a hushed whisper that sent a shiver, not unlike a premonition, down her spine and said, “all you have to do is ask Jude. But make it pretty, befitting of the king of fairy,” his words were an infuriating echo of what he had said to her not so long ago at the summer tournament after she had bested him in the war games. He had gripped her hair like this then too. But Jude doubted she would best him tonight.
She hated it. She hated him for this.
“Go fuck yourself,” she spat at him. He gripped her hair painfully tight this time and slapped her ass harder than he had before. The combination left a series of moans spilling out of her.
He drank up her cries like it was the fine wine they had drunk from the bottle which sat empty next to their dinner on the discarded tray situated on his bed next to them. The gaudy fabric of the comforter cushioned both of their knees, his tucked under and between hers, forcing her legs to be spread wide for him.
“But then I’d have to stop fucking you, my sweet nightmare. And I know neither one of us would want that” he looked down to where he was buried to the hilt in her, still and unmoving. His free hand massaging her red and sore butt cheeks that were bruising from his earlier abuse.
“Especially not after you were dressed up so divinely for me tonight. That dress was just begging to come off wasn’t it?” He hummed as his free hand went from massaging her sore bum to teasing her right above the nub between her thighs. So close to where she desperately needed him to be but giving her no reprieve and only making her more desperate. Jude bit her lip, refusing to respond, her stubbornness digging its heels in, so Cardan continued on.
“I could tell how wound up you were when you showed up here. With a pretty blush already on your breasts and the sweet scent of your arousal coming from your skirts with every step you took towards me.” The dress in question laid discarded on the floor beside his own clothes. It had been raven-black to match his hair, hugged her curves and muscles like a second skin, and was dangerously low cut. Definitely not her usual attire, definitely wasn't subtle Jude realized with embarrassment. Both of their wardrobes had been removed in haste not far into their dinner. The buttons of Cardan’s ridiculous blouse scattered the tiles beneath the bed, having been ripped from the fabric as Jude rushed to undress him in her lustful frenzy.
“So unusually kind of you to bring dinner and wine for me, to ask to eat in my company. I know it was all just an act to get me to fuck you, Jude. The least you could do for me is beg for it,” he whispered dangerously, his voice thick with his arousal.
Jude flushed again, this time in shame from his words. That he truly thought it out of her character to be kind. It was true of course. Jude wasn’t a very kind person, not after what she had lived through. But for some reason that was beyond her, she wanted him to think highly of her. She wanted him to think she was kind. And most bizarre of all, she wanted to be kind to him. Perhaps fairyland was driving her mortal mind mad after all.
“It wasn’t just to get you to bed me Cardan,” Jude answered ashamed of how breathy it came out, ashamed of what she was about to say, “I did want to enjoy your company tonight. I brought you dinner and wine because I thought it would make you happy.”
Jude would be damned before she begged him or anyone for anything. But if he wanted sweet words from her she would give it to him at this point. His free hands had moved upwards from tracing around her clit and had gone to circle her breasts. From time to time he would give them a brutal squeeze. More taunting but no release. Jude was a bundle of nerves wound up painfully tight. She needed her prize and she would be getting it if it was the last thing she did. She just wouldn’t beg for it.
To her surprise, he landed another searing smack to her backside sending her sliding forward and had him pulling her back onto his cock by her hair. Jude’s toes curled on the mattress, more moans spilling from her lips. She was beyond keeping them in at this point, the wine they had drunk making her dizzy, or perhaps it was just him doing that. The lust fogged her brain more than the alcohol did. She tried to slide forward again so she could push back onto his delicious length, rock hard and throbbing within her, but he held her hair tight, keeping her in place. Still no release in sight.
“Dirty mortal liar” Cardan spat at her, not believing her wishes to make him happy. Landing another brutal blow on her bum. Cardan had confessed to Jude in the court of shadows that he was no killer, but that didn’t take away from his cruel nature. He wasn't being gentle with her. Jude didn’t want him to be.
The spanking was a mercy compared to the torture he had been forcing her to endure. The sharp slaps gave her friction and reprieve from his cold refusal to please her in the ways she craved. And now because of her earlier outbursts, he remained buried in her gut unmoving and wouldn't move an inch till she begged him to. Before at least he had been in motion albeit it being painfully slow. Sliding in and out of her aching core, still slick and throbbing from his earlier ministrations with his mouth. He had spent longer feasting on her than he had on his meal, now cold and forgotten. He had tortured her with his tongue, bringing her to the edge of precipice but never allowing her to tumble over the peak into blissful oblivion.
She thought he would finally give her release when he slid his gloriously thick length inside of her but still he only taunted her. Slowly he would slide in and out of her, mocking her with what she was desperate for. He would pull out to his tip, her hair locked in his ringed hand keeping her in place while he eased back into her wetness at a punishingly slow pace. All the while knowing she was desperate for more. Each strike to her ass had been a godsend, pumping red hot arousal to her system while his little endearments, ‘my Jude’, ‘my sweet nightmare’ spurred her on. Cardan knew she secretly loved to hear them. Knew she loved hearing him call her ‘his’. Knew it made her think of all the things he could do to claim her as his; with his hands, mouth, and cock.
But they were far too alike the two of them, Cardan as prideful and stubborn as she. Jude could feel him pulsing inside her. A pounding throb in time with his heartbeat. She knew it had to be painful at this point, he was torturing himself as much as he was her. But that was part of the thrill for him. He loved the powerplay, loved toying. He wanted to come out on top; Jude couldn’t let him.
“I may be a liar Cardan but I didn’t just then. I want to make you happy.” Jude was panting as she spoke. She would never live this down. She couldn’t bring herself to care though. It was the truth. She wanted it as much as she wanted him at that moment. She hadn’t been able to rid herself of the guilt of tricking him into the crown and chaining him to the throne as well as her command. She wanted to see a smile on his face rather than the sneer that lived there most days, as breathtaking as he was with either. Jude wanted Cardan to be happy and she wanted to be the one to make him feel that way. Especially after she was the source of his misery. Although it wasn’t as though he hadn’t been the source for much of hers in the past. That alone was the only thing that kept her from begging him to give her what she so desired. That she was horny enough to even consider begging him, if he was deserving of it, was something she didn't want to think too much about.
“If you wanted to make me happy Jude,” he said her name like a curse, his frustration with her stubbornness evident, ”you would beg for me.”
She felt a ghost of a touch tickle against her arm then flee away an instant later. She peeked down as much as she could with Cardan pulling her head back like he was. Below, his tail was coiling and uncoiling. Whipping back and forth sporadically. Like a cat’s would while it attacked its prey. Before, he had the laziness of a cat who had caught a mouse; a cat that was toying its food before devouring it. Now he was agitated and ready to strike. Jude could use that.
At her refusal to respond to him Cardan tisked and lamented “well if you have nothing to ask of me, my goddess of death, then I suppose we are done here.”
He started to pull out of her as though he meant to leave her there as a panting, aching, mess with no release in sight. Her prize to be lost. She felt his tail whisper next to her arm again, just as he slid his tip out, and with the desperation of a mouse fleeing its captor, Jude latched onto his tail and ripped him back, slamming his raging length deep into her. Hard. The cross between a groan and a whimper that escaped from his lips, and the toe-curling feeling of him slamming into her made her mad with desperation and giddy with power. Jude wasn't the mouse anymore. She was a lioness; she was going to feed.
“You’ll do well to remember who put that crown on your head, My King. Begging is out of the question and will be until you are worthy of it,” she purred at him. “As your sechel, I’d advise you to please me and do it well. But, and more importantly,” she said as sweet as the fruit of the everapple tree, “As the Queen of Shadows and master of your fate I demand you do it,” she finished with a smirk, using the word ‘demand’ instead of ‘command’, so there was no true magical power over him to do so.
“And Cardan,” She said glancing over her shoulder, his grip on her hair had gone slack enough for her to do so from his shock at her actions and words, “Do make it worthy of a Queen.”
Her bravo started to wear off as the giddiness faded. It was in that moment, staring into the Achingly beautiful face of the High King, whose midnight black orbs burned like fire threatening to consume her that Jude realized her mistake. From the look of the wickedly sinister grin on his sinful lips, Jude knew would be getting her prize after all… and then some. Cardan had been playing nice until now, in hopes she would be nice in turn to him. Now that he knew there would be no such thing he was more than willing to unleash himself on her relentlessly.
What a fool she had been to forget one of the first rules of fairyland: Be careful what you wish for.
Jude would be lucky to be able to sit down or move for the next week without being sore if their last row together was any indication of how the rest of the evening would play out.
Cardan’s grip on her hair tightened again and used his free hand to trace a single finger up the curve of her spine, sending goosebumps flying in its wake. He pulled her up against his chest by her hair. Her head resting on his shoulder now, breasts pushed out to the world and peeking from the chill in the room brought on by his change in mood. Being the High King gave Cardan control over the weather and such things; no more nice Cardan who gave her sweet endearment, this was the Cardan she was most familiar with, his face the picture of icy rage.
Her breath plumed in clouds from the frigid temperature and ruffled the raven black hair sticking to the sweat on his brow. She shivered from the cold. He was so devastatingly beautiful like this it made her head spin. The sneer on his face made her toes curl knowing she was the one who had put it there.
His voice was murderous as he murmured, “Give me back my tail.”
Her grip on the thing tightened as it tried to lash out of her grip. His tone only stoked the fire burning in her gut, the heat fighting the chill of the room.
She felt the giddiness bubble up in her again, the same feeling of fear mixed with excitement that she got when she taunted him at school. The feeling of taking a dare.
“Fuck me like you were told princeling and perhaps I will,” she referred to him by the same mocking title his late siblings would call him by, all of them being more than a hundred years his senior and already have established roles in the kingdom, while he was hardly 19 and had still been in school with no real power. She was deliberately placing him beneath her by calling herself a queen and him only a boy prince, despite him being two years her senior. She felt the smugness tugging her lips when she heard his breath come out ragged and slow. He was going to great lengths to keep his temper in check, still not wanting to let her win. But Jude could taste her victory, her toes curled and her gut tingled with sharp electricity boiling there. An almost hysterical laugh bubbled up her throat, knowing that her next words would send him over the edge.
“Or perhaps you don’t know how to please a woman, hmmm?? Were all those ballads about you being a good lover just pixie dust in the breeze? Maybe the musicians of the court were just flattering you so that the fine people of fairy would think that you were actually good for something.”
It was an obvious lie and they both knew it, Cardan has had her screaming his name, soaking the sheets, and has made her a blubbering mess, nothing more than putty in his arms, much to her own shame. But the lie was an insult to his manhood nonetheless. He would have to fuck her senseless now, his honor and pride would demand it.
His grip on her hair tightened as the room rapidly started to heat back up, getting hotter by the second. Cardan was pissed now. He used his free hand to trace the curves of her body following his hand with his deadly stare. He took in every inch of her, from the blush on her cheeks that burned so bright it went straight down her neck and chest and spotted across her full breasts which were heavy and aching from her arousal. He took in Jude’s toned stomach and muscular thighs appraising them as though they were one of the powders he frequently took as though he hadn't had a dose in far too long and was itching for it. There was a furious hunger in that gaze. The stare of a recovering alcoholic glaring at the bottle before he dived to the bottom of it. Furious for even wanting it, furious for going back to it, furious for having said no to it for so long when it felt so right. He was going to give into Jude even if she didn’t beg him for it. He was pissed about it.
His tracing hand slowly inched towards the numb of nerves between Jude’s thighs, her hair tugged back on his shoulder allowed him to hear the airy sigh that befell her lips, tickling his hair. Her airy moan sounded like one someone would heave when they stepped into a steaming bath after a long day of hard work, easing their aching muscles. That wouldn't do at all. There would be no easing for her. If she wanted to step in that tub then Cardan was going to shove her in and force her head under the water and keep it there till she was thrashing for air. If she wouldn't beg him to start, then she would have to beg him to stop.
Cardan leaned in and whispered to her ear, using all of his willpower to keep his temper in check, “Fitting for a Queen you said hmm,” the words sent shivers running down her spine, had her walls clenching around his cock that was still buried in her, to her great dismay still not in motion.
Cardan paused to take a breath and for a moment the whole room stilled as though his magic had quieted the very air around them, as if the whole kingdom was tingling in anticipation, silently waiting to see what happened next. Even the roaring fire that was crackling in its hearth just seconds prior didn’t dare to make a sound, lest it invokes the wrath of the wicked king. The only noise was Jude’s ragged breathing in eerie contrast.
Cardan’s words eased out in his exhale, resembling the sickening woop in the stomach one gets when falling from large heights, “How's this for fitting?”
Jude’s eyes were blown wide and then forced tightly shut as he unleashed himself onto her. The sounds of the room roaring back to life around them were completely lost to her as the brutally aching bliss filled her to the brim. The sensations were overpowering her, overwhelming her senses after being denied it for so long. The feeling of his length filling her to the brim combined with his sinful hands, one tugging her hair the other rubbing her nub; It was too much. Cardan’s hand was brutal in its attack on her clit, rubbing her relentlessly right where she wanted it, just the way she liked it.
The act alone was more than enough and already toying her towards the edge of release. Cardan knew Jude’s body far too well. He had spent plenty of time tracking all her tells, tracking every breath she took while she lay beneath him from the first moment she welcomed him into her bed. His dark hungry eyes always locked on her taking everything in. Cardan was a fantastic lover not just because he knew how to please any woman who passed his way, but because he went to lengths to perfect his craft for those who stayed.
Jude realized with no little shame that he had been saying something to her but she had missed it because of the roaring in her ear. Her cheeks went impossibly pinker when she realized it hadn't been roaring, but her own moaning. She hadn't even realized she was doing it so overcome by her arousal after being denied all night. She glanced up at him and all she could stupidly say was, “huh?”
He barked a laugh, his head thrown back; he loved making her like this. Knocking Ms. Know-it-all off her pedestal, making her dumb-founded and drooling. Such a sharp contrast to her usual stoic demeanor. He leaned down close to her face, slowly licked up the dribble of spit hanging from the corner of her mouth. Then with a wicked smirk on his sinful face, one that promised nothing but trouble, he went to her ear and snickered, “you’re as soaked for me as you were when I shoved you into that river mortal.”
As he said it he rubbed her just so, sending her shuddering relentlessly into an orgasm around his unmoving cock. The orgasm shattered her mind and made her see white, then instantly red from the fury his word sent her into. She hated that he made her come while he said that. Knew he had done it on purpose to piss her off. Knew it was the damning truth since no lie could fall from his fairy lips. Bliss, anger, and shame all swelled within her swirling together and muddling her mind in ways fairy fruit never could. Jude felt as though she might fade into the very magic of fairyland at that moment for surely if one could be magic itself, this would be how they always felt.
Jude couldn’t even get a word in back at him for what he said because he slammed his mouth against hers before she could recover enough to form a coherent sentence; licking and drinking up her moans like it was his only purpose in life. His other hand moved from restraining her hair and wrapped around her middle, pinning the arm holding his tail to her side in an ironclad hold and pinning her body against chest; his hand reaching up to attack her breasts. Switching back and forth between one and the other, he would alternate massaging and pinching her nipples with painful precision. His other hand was still working her clit sending her rolling from one orgasm into the next. The combination of it all was so overwhelming she cried out into his mouth as she squirted all over his hands, soaking their legs and the sheets beneath them. Jude was awash with shame and bliss, leaning her full weight on him to remain upright. He hadn’t even begun to fuck her properly yet, Cardan was still buried within her throbbing painfully from denying himself and she was already a stupid mess in his arms. The shit-eating smirk on his face told her that he was thinking the same thing.
Jude was a fool for try to best Cardan here. She may be a cunning spy and a swords master but the bedroom and lovemaking was his domain. Her legs quivered beneath her, hands limp at her side. Cardan released his hold on her, sending her falling ungracefully forward onto her chest and face. He laughed at her mockingly, “and now the sheets are nearly as soaked as your clothes were that day.”
Jude’s blood boiled and she wanted to turn around and slap him. But as she went to move she found herself unable to. While she hadn’t been looking, brain hazy from her orgasms, the roots from the tree atop the hill had curled their way down the bedposts and snaked their way across the sheets wrapping around her wrists binding her in place. Another display of his kingly magic. Jude tried to figure where she went wrong, one moment she was the one with power and now here she was again, completely at his mercy and more so than before. The answer to her question flicked back and forth in the periphery of her vision, his tail moving again like a lazy cat playing a game it knew it was going to win. He had made her come so hard she completely lost her senses and touched the stars and managed to release her one and only advantage.
“Thank you for returning my tail to me sweet Jude,” he said, noting her coming to this realization. His hand returned to her hair pulling her head back as much as he could while her hands were bound. He shifted, leaning forward shifting his body causing his cock to finally move within her once more; it was enough to make her lose a breathy moan. Oh! The frustration she felt with herself! She was a fool for him and it was humiliating. His other hand went back to massaging her bruised bum as he chuckled darkly behind her.
“Shall we continue?” he asked in a voice of innocence that certainly seemed akin to lying with how far innocence was from his intentions. Jude was still miserably horny, and not even the two earth-shattering orgasms he had given her were able to satiate her need after all the torture he had put her through earlier. She craved him desperately but her wounded pride couldn't bear to ask him to go on. She tried to shift her bum against his length again, the same attempts she had earlier, knowing it was just as futile now as it had been before. He laughed at her, slamming his palm hard against her ass just as he had done each time before.
“Excuse me, your majesty,” he purred, mocking her for calling herself a queen while pumping into her once, twice. Teasing her, making her nails dig into the bound palms of her hands in ecstasy, “I believe I asked you a question, my queen.”
Another endearment. Him calling her his. His queen. She squirmed again, willing him to please her but he held fast.
“Last chance Jude,” he murmured in her ear, leaning all the way forward so his cocked filled her completely, “Beg for mercy and I’ll give it to you,” the smirk was as present as ever in his infuriatingly sexy voice.
Jude had underestimated Cardan. She got her prize, she had won the battle, but he was going to win the war. With that miserable thought in mind and her pride boiling with anger she spat out her response, “fuck you.”
Cardan’s chuckle was dark and dangerous as he said, “with pleasure.”
He slammed into her unrelenting: brutal and hard. Jude was going to have to skip training tomorrow because of this, her body would be too sore. She hated missing training and it made her furious at him. Perhaps she just liked being made at him, she thought as he hit her spot over and over again making her see spots. She went to bury her moans and cries in the covers, still damp beneath them from when she squirted, but he pulled her hair back forcing her to cry out into the room for him to hear.
“Moan for me Queen Jude,” he gruffed out viciously, riled up and ravenous after having to wait so long himself to have her, “let me hear how worthy this fucking is of you hmm.. this is what you wanted wasn't it? A good fucking? It's what you came here for.”
He was relentless, Jude was biting her lip trying hard to not give him what he wanted. The wet sloppy sound of their bodies joining together echoed in the room in time with the slapping of his pelvis against her ass. It was debauched to hear how sinfully wet she was for him, the wet slapping making it painfully evident just how ‘worthy’ his fucking was. She groaned through her teeth and he yanked her hair hard forcing her mouth open. Her moans came spilling out, pitching each time he thrust his body into hers.
Cardan was groaning with her now. He was getting close if his sporadic thrusts were any indicator. The knowledge that he was getting off to her made her walls clench around him and her toes curl in pleasure, forcing a groan from deep in his throat to spill out. It was otherworldly, doing this with him, so many emotions, sensations, and feelings all swirling together in a messy lustful haze that left them rutting like savage dogs by the end of the night. They hated each other, didn't they? How could they keep coming back to each other like this? Why did this feel so right?
He pulled her hair back hard making her back bend almost painfully towards him, her wrists straining against the vines that bound her; training was definitely out of the question this week. She could see his face now, brows pinched, eyes dark, sweat dripping off of him while his mouth hung open. He was devastatingly gorgeous like this. He leaned down and kissed her as he landed three sharp blows to her ass with his other hand as he pounded into her relentlessly. She squirted again seeing stars as another orgasm ran through her. He smiled a brilliant smile down at her for it. So beautiful that she all but forgot her pride existed as she said breathily, “I didn’t come here just to fuck you Cardan, I swear it,” blush burning her cheeks at her confession, “I wanted to make you happy.”
She felt emotions shining on her face, ones she always buried but she didn’t mind it. Jude was mad with pleasure, drunk on his kiss, his scent, and sensations. Jude was drunk on him. Caution was lost to her.
Cardan’s eyes went wide at her words and he released her hair suddenly. A swear was a serious thing in Fairy especially one made to the high king. The vines receded from restraining her and he unsheathed himself from her aching core. She was met with a jolt of horror at what she had done, what she had said, in fear that she had upset him.
The panic was quickly replaced by confusion as he rolled her onto her back with tender hands and then leaned above her positioning himself between her legs with one arm bracing beside her head while his other hand came up to tenderly caressing her cheek. His cock was positioned right before her entrance, leaking with precum. He clearly had stopped right before his climax. What on earth compelled him to do such a thing?
“Is that the truth?” he said in a breathy whisper, chest still heaving from their wild fuckings, still trying to catch his breath.
All Jude could manage was a small nod.
His eyes searched hers, looking for something. Jude didn’t know if he found what he was looking for but after a moment he slowly slid into her again staring into her eyes. She wanted to look away, his gaze was too much as he slowly and sweetly slid their bodies together, again and again. He was being tender with not a rush in the world. A different kind of fire started building within her. Instead of a burning inferno like earlier, this one was the slow-burning of water set to boil. His dark gaze was searching, consuming. His beautiful face slack in awe as he looked at her.
“Beautiful,” he murmured like wonder spilling out of him. Jude snapped her eyes shut to it, to what she felt. She felt naked for the first time today despite having been freed of her clothing for the better part of two hours now. The way he was holding her, the way their bodies slid together, it terrified her, the emotions it stirred up. He cooed at her then, fingers caressing her cheek, “Jude,” he said sweetly, “look at me Jude, it's okay.”
She scrunched her eyes shut further at his words. He stilled, pulling away from her. He heaved a sigh, that sounded so much like hurt and disappointment. Quickly, shyly her hand reached out to the ringed one on her cheek just as it went to pull away. Softly Jude said, “Please-- Please don’t stop.”
Jude mustered all the courage she had, reached into the well of fearlessness she had obtained from living in fairyland, and opened her eyes. Dark pools the color of midnight stared back at her, full of swimming emotion. It was overwhelming, confusing. She wished she knew what he was thinking, wished she knew if this meant something. There was so much fear in her and she knew he could see it all on her face. She was so scared of this, “Please Cardan, keep going. Please. I-- I beg you.”
The smile that graced his shocked face was beautiful and hesitant like the one someone might make if they thought something was too good to be true. She shocked herself with the plea, she had never thought she could long for someone the way that she did at that moment. She wished she knew what he was thinking. She peeked to his tail in hope of gaining some insight, but it was wrapped around her calf, the furred tip seemed to be caressing her. She looked back up at him. Cardan was smirking, but it wasn't mocking, it seemed… endearing almost. But that couldn’t be. He clearly knew why Jude looked at his tail, knowing she liked keeping an eye on it because it made him easier to read. The crinkles beneath his eyes gave away happiness and his smirk tugged into a dazzling smile.
Jude’s heart was pounding so hard it almost hurt. He ran his hand down from her cheek to her chest, feeling how fast it was pounding. His smile only grew, as he leaned down and nuzzled his nose against hers. Jude let loose a breath she didn't know she had been holding, it came spilling out of her like an airy laugh, her lashes fluttering at his closeness. He was being so sweet, it threw her off guard. She peeked into his eyes once more, she didn't really know what she was looking for in them. But she knew what she did not find there: his arrogance, his cruelty, and his wickedness.
There in his dark eyes, she saw something she didn't understand yet. Saw something shining there that she knew reflected back in her own. Confusion mingled with an emotion she had never known before. She realized she didn't understand a lot of things, about life, fairyland, and him. From the look in his eyes, she realized she didn't need to understand everything. And with that realization, she wasn't afraid anymore. She peered into his eyes unabashedly now, Belkin’s words from in the Isle of the Forgotten rang in her head:
“to mortals, the feeling of falling in love is similar to the feeling of fear.”
But what do mortals feel when they stop falling. What happens when they were wholly in love.
Jude didn’t know, and she didn’t care to know. She didn’t need to understand everything, she didn’t need to understand what she felt. She needed to just feel it.
If nothing else, Jude felt safe here in Cardan’s arms. A feeling that she had long grown unaccustomed to thanks to the cruelty of her life. She looked at the man before her, so similar to yet so strikingly different from the boy he was under Belkin’s thumb. This was a man who she wanted to make happy. And despite his uncanny ability to frustrate her, he had the uncanny ability to make her happy as well. He made her forget her pride and she made him forget his own. Neither caring who came out on top anymore. Maybe it was just the sex, maybe it was something more. She didn’t know and somehow that was fine.
With those thoughts singing in her head, Jude Duerte leaned up and kissed Cardan Greenbriar soft and slow, allowing all the things she kept buried within her to come pouring out. Allowing all the things she didn’t understand to pour out with it because perhaps Cardan didn’t understand it either. Perhaps they could learn to understand it together.
So that night, Jude waved the white flag and she made love to the King of Fairy.
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danses-with-dogmeat · 3 years
Note
romanced hancock reacting to pregnant sole? (obviously not his baby, but a donor's haha)
Hancock x Pregnant! F!Sole Headcannons:
Oh look! I've been enabled yet again! No, but this is great though, I love thinking about happy companions starting a family with Sole ❤
Also, if y'all want any headcannons or anything for companions as parents please hmu, cuz my brain just naturally seems to consider that after doing these pregnancy prompts anyway 😅
Anyway, thanks for the ask, I hope you enjoy!
The ghoul always wondered whether or not his tear ducts would still work after his whole ordeal, and the news that the love of his life was ready and willing to start a family with him would certainly seek to find out. As soon as she gave the word that the donorship had worked, Hancock would be grinning wide and tearfully, with upturned brows and a trembling lip. Unable to speak at first, he would pull an equally tearful Sole into the tightest hug he could muster, their bodies flush, his arms enveloping his love as his roughened cheek pressed insistently against her smooth one. “You just made me the happiest ghoul in the whole damn world, you know that, sunshine?” He’d say just before touching his lips to her cheek in a long, drawn out, tender kiss. (The action may or may not escalate into a long trail of kisses spanning across Sole's entire face as mirthful giggles escape her lips.)
Who would've thought that this was in the cards for him? Certainly not Hancock. He thought he was lucky enough just to be in the presence of someone like Sole, but for her to return the feelings he had for her? To enthusiastically agree to being in a relationship with him? To want to start a family together? Hancock was sure he was dead, or riding the wildest high of his life, for how could this be reality for someone like him? A junkie, a bachelor, a coward, a ghoul, a flimsy torn page with "bad news" written all over it. Nah, he didn't deserve this, but damn was he overjoyed at the fact that Sole thought he did, and who was he to question her judgement?
Hancock had never thought this would be possible, the whole "baby" thing… even though he knew about donors and such, he always thought it would be too painful for Sole to consider having a family again. And with him? Of all the folks in the Commonwealth and beyond, she wanted the infamous ghoulified mayor of Goodneighbor to be a father? To her kid? He was fucking ecstatic. He didn’t quite understand why she wanted to raise a baby with him, why she thought he’d be any good at it, if she thought that. He knew he wouldn’t be the perfect fit for this kinda lifestyle; that he knew for certain, but the fact that she wanted him to try… that shit made his whole body tingle with warm gratitude from the inside out.
He would try to be calm, collected, and altogether nonchalant about the whole process in order to keep Sole relaxed. From finding the donor, to the fertilization, to the pregnancy, and all the way through to Sole going into labor, he would try to be as calm and cool as a November night. And on the outside, he'd do a damn good job, but inside? Nah, inside, this ghoul's worried sick. If anything went wrong with his sunshine, he wouldn't know what to do, he's not sure he could take a blow like that.
So, he’d try not to think too much about what could go wrong, since he knew that would only make it harder for him to be there for Sole in the way that she needed, but occasionally he’d just have those kinda days. A bad trip, a fitful night fraught with horrific dreams, a bout of horrifying overthinking as Sole uttered a pained sound from one little thing or another, or a stint of morning sickness that seemed to last just a bit too long for his liking. All of these would have the poor mayor on edge. Normally, when he was stressed, Hancock would try to chill out with some jet, or calmex, but he really was trying to give up the junkie life to the best of his irradiated abilities. It was a vicious cycle of anxiety every once in a while, but Sole was always there to help him through it. To remind him that this wasn’t her first experience with having a baby, to tell him that he was doing a wonderful job, despite his anxieties, and to remind him that they were the Sole Survivor and the Mayor of fucking Goodneighbor, and that they could face damn near anything when they were together.
Those were only the bad days though. On the good days, oh, hon... Hancock was simply blissful. Sole really is in for a treat, as she is absolutely 100% pampered and loved on, coddled and looked after for 9 months straight, and then some (minus the couple of bad days, where she has to be the one doing the coddling, but really, how could she mind?). As soon as the pair finds out that Sole really is going to have this baby, Hancock is already offering her anything she may need in order to stay safe and comfortable for the next 9 months.
Hancock’s chill personality really shines when it comes to any mood swings Sole may have, and a lifetime of chem and alcohol use has rendered the ghoul particularly skilled at cooking foods that are comforting and easy to make/eat that come in handy after bouts of morning sickness. Who knew that all of his hangover experience would come in handy like this?
While Hancock loves nothing more than going on adventures in the Commonwealth alongside his beloved, he wouldn’t say it in so many words, but would be more reluctant than usual to leave Goodneighbor or Sole’s house. When, before, he would have leapt up at the prospect of hunting down some goons and making the world a better place through some good ole fashioned violence, Hancock couldn’t think of anything worse than having Sole get injured, or potentially losing the one he loves more than anything in the world, and the possibility of a future family with her if some shit went wrong. So, while he absolutely knows she is capable and an complete beast in combat, and he recognizes that Sole can’t stay cooped up indoors for the whole 9 months, (and let’s face it, he certainly doesn’t want to either, but he’s not about to leave his love behind so he can get outta the house once in a while) he definitely steers the pair away from the areas he knows to be more sketchy than others.
Hancock just loves showing Sole off. He did this before the pregnancy as well, but man, now if anyone comes up to the pair when she starts showing, you know Hancock is already beaming as he tells the inquiring stranger just how far along she is, whether it’s a boy or a girl (if they know), or even what they think the baby’s gender is if they don’t want to know/can’t find out, how often the baby has been kicking, and he may even ask for opinions on baby names from certain kind folks who come up to chat with the parents-to-be. It’s also quite likely that he uses these passer-byes as an indirect way to further compliment Sole, saying things to them like, “Doesn’t she look gorgeous?,” “Just look at how she glows,” or “It’s just incredible how you/these ladies do this, isn’t it? Damn it if she's not the strongest person I know,” just to showcase his admiration for her. Does it sometimes result in strange looks from the strangers? Of course. Does Hancock care, or even seem to notice? Not remotely. He's too busy gawking at the love of his life and her blushing, embarrassed glory.
The mayor tends not to be rude about it unless the person ignores him, but if he notices someone smoking nearby, he will ask them to put out whatever it is, or to simply move if he and Sole were there first. In addition to that, he will make quite the lifestyle change for himself, voluntarily giving up chems to the best of his abilities so long as withdrawals don't prevent him from caring for Sole, and when he does partake, Hancock won’t do it around her, he’ll move outside or to another room. He would also offer to give up alcohol, since he knows that she won’t be able to drink with him anyway, and leave it up to her if she wants him to go cold turkey like her. Even if she doesn’t mind, he still won’t drink in excess around her during her pregnancy. It's kind of a respect thing for him, and there ain't no one he respects more than the future mother of his child.
(little bit of NSFW content here) When it comes to sex, Hancock is even more generous than usual in the bedroom (if you can believe it's possible). His every movement acts as a tribute to his appreciation for the woman he loves more than life itself. He’d be sure to be gentle, but in all honesty, Hancock wouldn’t change anything too much (no need to fix what ain't broken, ya know?). He has always paid particular attention to Sole beneath the sheets, since he’s quite experimental, and comfortable with most kinks and things himself, so he tends to let her choose positions, location, duration, and pacing, and would definitely keep it this way during the pregnancy. You think this man used to really get into body worship before, this is just a whole nuther level. As Sole puts on weight later into her pregnancy, he takes full advantage of her swelling plushness, running his hands over her body, taking the time to squeeze and palm every bit of her growing softness, constantly complimenting every bit of her as his starving eyes eat up every inch of her beauty. Especially if Sole is self-conscious about any of the changes in her body, Hancock will be sure to constantly remind her that she’s the most captivating and gorgeous person he’s ever met. No stretch mark appears on her body without being lovingly kissed, no soreness will develop without the offer of a nice, long massage (this perhaps is just another excuse to get his hands on her), no tenderness will go unnoticed and will be accounted for when his hands are roaming her body. In general, he’s as loving and doting as ever, but he's also on high alert for any signs of pain or discomfort coming from his other half.
He’d be SO excited every time the baby kicked. For some reason, the babe seems to wait until he’s around to do it, and he’s thrilled. Sole is a little weirded out by it, but she honestly takes it as a good sign. But oh man, Hancock's hands will be all up in that shit, not wanting to miss a thing as Sole smiles at him like this isn't the fourth time this has happened in one evening (does he use this as yet another excuse to touch Sole? Hmm, who knows [the answer is yes]). Sometimes he forgets to be sympathetic when Sole can't sleep due to the fluttering in her belly, but his roughened hands smoothing rhythmically over her stomach throughout the night might just help her catch a few Zzs after all.
He’s admittedly quite nervous as she approaches labor, becoming ever more protective as her belly swells to its largest point, ensuring she avoids any kinda gun fight, crazy high heights or unneeded stress, and he would be adamant about Sole sitting out any outings, missions, or other activities in the dangers of the Commonwealth. But man, would he make an environment she didn’t want to leave. Pillows, snacks, dim lighting, good conversation, music, soft touches, compliments galore, and a man who is at her constant beck and call, willing and happy to do anything and everything she might need or want? Yeah, here’s to say, Sole didn’t really want to leave anyway.
By the end of the pregnancy, Hancock has a strange mix of apprehension and denial going on. He’s used to Sole being pregnant now, he knows how to deal with everything, how to take care of her, what makes her uncomfortable and how to fix it. But a kid? An infant? He doesn’t know how babies work, doesn’t know how to tell what they want from him. He’s excited beyond belief at the thought of being a father, but he just doesn’t know how to do it. He tries to think back to his own dad, and the way that he was brought up as a kid, (though, he's not sure that's a great frame of reference given the way he turned out) and definitely goes off of Sole’s judgement, but he can’t shake the feeling that he was never meant for this. To settle down and have a family. He isn’t his dad, he’s Hancock. He’s not a “family man,” not a picturesque pre-war looking man with a normal job and a cookie-cutter backstory; he’s a self-made ghoul, a junkie, a deadbeat whose earned his position of power by bathing in the blood of tyrants who died by his own hand, and shooting his veins up with every kinda poison the wastes have to offer. How do you explain that to a kid? That he made himself the way he is, cuz he couldn’t stand the man he’d grown up to be? What the hell kinda example is that? He wouldn't doubt for a second that his baby would be the center of his world from the moment he sees it, but if anything, that only ups the anxiety that he'll do something to mess the kid up. Hancock would be nervous as shit, but if Sole had confidence in him, well… he trusts her judgement more than he does his own, so if she thinks he’s "daddy" material, he ain’t gonna argue with that. All he can do is hope she’s right, follow her lead, take it one day at a time, and hope that him trying his absolute hardest will be enough.
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sohin-ace · 3 years
Text
Jotaro - Kakyoin's Notebook
I'm sorry, I clickbaited y'all. The pairing in this story is not official.
...unless?
As you were all about to check out of the hotel, You decided to go back to everyone's respective rooms to make sure none of you forgot anything.
The crusaders were downstairs and you came up, checking every room. Everything seemed okay, you only needed to check Kakyoin and Jotaro's room last and then go back down.
You entered their room and looked everywhere. You stumbled onto a little notebook that was halfway underneath one of the pillows right as you were about to leave.
"Huh? Oops, I nearly didn't see that!" You bent down and took the notebook in your hands. It was just about pocket-sized. "Oh I do remember Jotaro having something like that, better get it back to him!"
Out of fateful clumsiness, the notebook slipped out of your hands and fell on the ground, opening on a random page. You crouched to pick it up, but then, your gaze fell upon what was on the page.
Your breath hitched in speechless confusion at what you saw, written at the top, in big font.
'Y/NxJotaro'
Why was your name and Jotaro's on that page? Was that some kind of memo? You knew Jotaro had the habit of taking notes to remember things, but why was your name in there?
Your curiosity got the best of you and you continued to look down the page, swiping through the others. You knew it was terribly wrong and you were invading his privacy but you were just so lost. It concerned you, there was your name on it.
" 'One-shot Draft... WIP', What does that even mean? J-... Jotaro did this?" You mumbled out loud, face scrunching up in confusion and slight fear as you looked through words you couldn't understand.
" 'Soulmate AU', 'Drabble', 'NSFW'? Are those some kind of codes?"
Pages long of stories decorated the sheets, so many you couldn't read everything. There were even some sketches and drawings that you didn't have the heart to look at. You managed to read some pieces of stories that left you even more confused. You read to yourself.
' "W-wait!" Y/N said as tears prickled in her eyes, her face flushed with innocent shyness. "I-It's my first time..."
"Don't worry," Jotaro spoke, hovering above her, his voice deep and soothing. "I'll be gentle." '
...What? You don't remember ever saying anything of the sort? You couldn't comprehend what you were reading. Whatever was written in there never happened and was fictional or somesuch to you.
When it was just too much for you to handle, you closed the notebook, your face still strained with mixed feelings.
Only then did you notice that there was a cherry sticker on the back of the notebook. After looking at the first page, you saw the name of the owner.
Noriaki Kakyoin.
"K-kakyo-... Oh my gosh..."
You were shocked, but somehow relieved. It made more sense than the author being Jotaro, but it still blew you away, the fact that Kakyoin would write such things on your and Jotaro's behalf.
Suddenly, Polnareff walked by and noticed you through the open door. You flinched when he called out to you and entered the room.
"Ah there you are Y/N! We started to worry!" He approached you and he noticed what you were holding. "Oh that's Kakyoin's notebook! He can't live without it, good thing you found it! Okay, let's go now, the others are waiting. Allez, on y va!"
He guided you out of the room and you followed, clutching the notebook. Polnareff didn't have to know the weird things written on it about you and Jotaro. You had to discover what it all meant.
"That's bullshit. You don't make any sense, Y/N." Jotaro scoffed at you, a few hours after the little hotel room occurence.
"I swear on my future husband's life! I'll prove it to you, look." You turned around and looked for your red haired friend. "Kakyoin! Can I doodle something on your notebook please~?"
"Huh?" He looked at you questioningly. "Why all of a sudden?"
"Well, Mr. Joestar will take a while to come back, so might as well kill some time. I'll write a cute message for you to read on the last train home!"
The red head smiled at your goofiness and thought 'why not?'. He took out his notebook along with a pen, but instead of giving it to you, he opened it on a specific empty page.
"Here," He handed you the items. "Only draw on this page. Don't draw on the other pages."
You nodded. "Got it! Thank you Kakyoin~!"
You smiled innocently and as soon as the male turned his back to you, your expression turned dark and you instantly looked for Jotaro who was sitting nearby.
"Jojo! Here, I have it, let's do this!" You stood in front of him with the notebook in your hands and he sighed.
"Yare yare daze, I'm not betraying his trust because of your shadiness."
"It's not like that! There's-..." You cut yourself off to look behind you and check if Kakyoin was looking.
You leaned down, inching towards Jotaro's face and whispered quietly. "There are things about us in here. Last time I saw it on accident, but if Kakyoin writes stuff about us, it's our legitimate right to know!"
"Says who? Are you a lawyer or something?"
"Jojo please!!" You pleaded while gripping on the collar of his gakuran, moving the chains on it and making them clang loudly.
The sudden noise alerted the cherry-haired fellow who turned his head to look at you both from afar. His eyes instantly widened and sparkled with vicious yet happy stars.
He loved to see his two best friends interract and, he knew damn well he took half of your interractions out of context, but that's what made them so good. His imagination started running wild at the scene before him.
The way you desperately held onto Jotaro, your faces, so close to each other, your begging eyes looking at him, yearning for his lips, waiting for one thing only.
'Jojo, please!' Kakyoin muttered what he imagined you would say. 'Say yes... I've been dying to kiss you!'
Back to you two, Jotaro clicked his tongue and looked away, closing his eyes in frustration. He hated the fact that he just couldn't refuse you anything.
"Tch! You're so fucking annoying. Fine, I get it, give it to me." Jotaro grumbled and moved your hands away from him, snatching the notebook from your hand.
'Tch! You know I can't resist you. Fine, don't beg for me to stop when I start messing you up.' Kakyoin continued, imitating his friend's deep voice under his breath and being surprisingly in character, for the inappropriate things he was imagining.
Kakyoin tensed up with anticipation when Jotaro suddenly grabbed your wrists, his big strong hands overpowering your fragile ones easily. You may have made the first move, but he would take the lead.
If it wasn't for the public surrounding you, Kakyoin was sure his friend would have gotten up and slammed you against the wall, pinning your hands at your side while you whimpered his name cutely. But he had to hold back, at least for now, or so Kakyoin daydreamed.
"Hey Kakyoin, what're you looking at? Come here for a bit!"
Before Kakyoin could even see the rest of the scene, which happened to be the most interesting part, he was interrupted by Polnareff who was in dire need for help with a nearby vending machine that seemed to have eaten his money.
Kakyoin sighed a bit annoyed, but joined his French comrade, not even glancing back at you. He'd have to remember to write everything down as soon as you gave him back his notebook.
Kakyoin Noriaki was an average boy that loved action and adventures, but he secretely wasn't immune to a good sweet romance story.
When you joined the crusaders, your interactions with Jotaro seemed as platonic as with the rest of the men. But for some reason, the boy started to feel some kind of connection between you two.
He didn't know when or how it started, but he felt like something was different at a certain point.
Why was it so cute when, one day, you removed Jotaro's hat to fix the pins that were moved out of place after a fight, and he let you put it back on him, even though he never lets anybody touch it?
Or maybe it was that other time in a restaurant where, after Jotaro eyed your dessert for a while, you exchanged your cakes to let him have a taste, stealing a bite from his own in the process.
Or that day when you struggled put your earrings back on and he had to help you out, only to struggle even more, his fingers too big and clumsy to be accurate. He had to call out Star Platinum to do it while he held your hair out of the way.
Even the simplest of gestures seemed romantic and adorable to him. He was sure something was going on between you two, and yet, you were too dense to realize it. All of this fueled his inner fanboy and it prevented him from sleeping at night.
He shipped you two so goddamn much.
He was guilty, but he loved every single bit of it. Of course, no one could know. If someone knew, especially you two, that'd be the end of him.
You were all waiting for the next train to arrive, which was a big 40 minutes. Joseph and Abdul went to buy something to snack on while you waited and Polnareff went to the restroom.
Kakyoin was sitting next to you, his back resting against the wall and his eyes were closed. As you thought he had fallen asleep, you took this moment to turn the other way to talk to your nonchalant friend.
"You see?" You spoke softly, careful to not wake Kakyoin up. "I told you there were stuff about us in that notebook!"
"Shut up, there were only messages on that page, I'm sure the others were the same." He grumbled with the same low intensity as you. "And you know damn well he can be a weirdo sometimes."
"But still, I want to understand... And also, what does 'smut' even mean?"
He pretended to be asleep, but his mind was racing.
Kakyoin who wasn't quite sleeping and very much listening to whatever he could hear through the background noise of the station, flinched and started blushing.
Just, when and where did you heard that term?
" 'Smut'?" Jotaro looked at you with confused furrowed eyebrows. "Hell if I know. You speak better english than I do, shouldn't you know?"
"Well I..."
Before the conversation could go down even further, Kakyoin feigned waking up and got up from his slouched position.
You noticed and turned around, staring at him, scared that he would ask what you were talking about, as you didn't want to confront him about the weird things you saw in his notes. If he ever knew, he would finish you. But something worse happened.
Jotaro nudged you and tilted his head towards Kakyoin, but you quite didn't get the message.
"Oi Kakyoin, do you know what 'smut' means? You know a lot of languages, right?" Jotaro asked like it was nothing and you gasped, secretly wanting to slap Jotaro for his indiscretion.
Kakyoin looked over at him, unfazed as ever. "Smut? Hmmm I guess I can look it up later. Where did you hear that?"
Jotaro innocently signed your death warrant. "Y/N just told me."
"JOTARO!!!" You shot up from your seat and stared at him in pure disbelief and betrayal. "OH MY- ARE YOU SERIOUS?! YOU TRAITOR!!!"
"Oh really?" Kakyoin teased, sending you a knowing look. "What's going on with you two? Are you keeping secrets from me?"
You blushed and flinched as Kakyoin's amethyst eyes stared through your soul. Before Jotaro could say anything else, you slapped a hand over his big mouth and Kakyoin's eye glinted.
"I-I mean... No! Wait. There's something I need to tell Jojo, excuse us for a sec."
You then leaned in and cupped Jotaro's ear as you whispered. Kakyoin looked at you in pure satisfaction, trying his best to not start smiling and giggling like a goofy schoolgirl.
Oh no, he didn't need to hear the sweet nothings you were deliciously breathing on Jotaro's now tingling skin. Imagining it was more than enough.
You leaned back and softly spoke to him. "Don't ruin this for us. I'm trusting you."
"Yare Yare daze. You put me into this in the first place. Don't complain."
Kakyoin's eyes widened and he turned his head around, trying to hide his expression and pretended he totally didn't hear that. Oh how sweet the lack of context was for his little fanboy mind. He wouldn't ask too many questions since you were offering him such a good show.
On the train, you waited until Kakyoin was completely out and asleep to subdue his notebook. That would make a good reading on the 4 hours long travel.
"Yes that's it! Right on the left pocket, yeah that one!"
You guided Jotaro who was hiding not too far from Kakyoin's seat as your delinquent friend used Star Platinum to steal your cherry loving friend's notebook.
When he finally had it, Star Platinum brought it back and both you and Jotaro proceeded to read through the many drafts and stories about you two.
Getting ready for one hell of a joy ride.
Bonus:
Kakyoin stretched and took a deep breath of fresh air as he got off the train.
"Aah~! I slept like a log. Huh? What's wrong, why are you two so red? Did you get motion sick, maybe?"
Kakyoin commented upon seeing your and Jotaro's flushed face as you got off. Your shoulders were slumped in shame and Jotaro was hiding behind his hat like a wanted criminal.
"Uh yeah... Here Kakyoin, you dropped this..." you groaned and handed him his notebook.
He thanked you and took his due. When he was gone, you glanced at Jotaro and you both shared intense empathy and regret.
Don't steal Kakyoin's notebook.
Oh man, wouldn't it be fun and also a bit sad if after Dio was defeated, Y/N and Jotaro became a couple?
You walked by the river, holding hands with Jotaro after a long week of finals. You suddenly stopped in your tracks and looked at the water reflecting the orange sunset.
Jotaro looked at you confused, but followed your gaze, until both of you laid eyes on a young girl painting the scenery on a canvas.
"You know... He would have loved this..." You started softly, a melancholic look cast on the girl as her Stand posed on the grass like a model, thinking herself only could see it. "To see us together, I mean..."
Jotaro inspected the girl, her red curls and green uniform moving messily in the wind. "Did he ever write something about us watching him paint?"
You chuckled sadly. "Why didn't he think of that? His stories were great, but he was in none of them..."
Jotaro noticed you biting your lip as your voice wavered slightly and he squeezed your hand in reassurance. You laid your head on his arm and he responded by bringing you closer to him.
"But now he is."
OKAY AUTHOR OUT
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seijorhi · 3 years
Text
Split
Ok so we’re a little over a week late but the final spooktober fic is finally here!! Jekyll and Hyde Twins was one hell of a prompt to write, but you guys really wanted it so... I hope y'all like it!! 🔪👀
But on another note, thank you guys for sending in suggestions and voting, it was actually super fun!
Atsumu Miya x female reader & Osamu Miya x female reader 
TW extremely dubious consent, blood, knife play, minor character death, implied abuse, smut, nsfw
“Some girl stopped by the shop today.”
The statement itself is fairly innocuous, there’s no reason for it to make the skin on the back of your neck prickle, your heart skip a beat. But maybe it’s not so much the words themselves, but the one who’s saying them.
Or the familiar, glinting kitchen knife he’s absentmindedly toying with, the sharp tip tracing delicately over the bare skin of your thigh. 
Atsumu smirks as you try in vain to fight back a shiver. It’s barely touching you, certainly not with enough pressure to actually slice through the skin - wickedly sharp edge or not - but he could. He has before; a name carved artfully into your hip, another on your inner thigh. Proof, you suppose, that no matter where you go or how far you run, you’ll always belong to him. 
(Sometimes you wonder if it’s not just for your sake that he marks you, but for Osamu’s as well.)
Today, he seems content just to tease, watching in amusement as goosebumps prickle in the wake of his blade. You’re always so responsive, it’s one of the things he loves so much about you - or so he tells you. 
You know better than to play dumb, but silence can be equally as damning, so you hum in quiet acknowledgement, shifting uneasily beneath him as you wait for him to continue. Atsumu’s never been the type for idle chit chat. He wouldn’t care that some random woman visited Onigiri Miya (it was a restaurant, after all), and he certainly wouldn’t have bothered stomping down here to tell you about it unless it was somehow relevant.
The fact that he’s showed up at all means that it can’t be anything good. 
He eyes you for a long moment, drinking in the fear you still haven’t quite managed to learn to hide from him. But there’s a hardness there, lying behind the smirk. A glint of something dark and angry, the sign of a beast wild and vicious, beating at the bars that hold it at bay. That, more than the knife in his hands, is the reason that you’re afraid. 
“An old friend of yours, Misako or somethin’. Had a lotta questions ‘bout you, kept bugging Samu until he kicked her ass out when the rush came through.”
Misako. There’s a burning ache in your chest at the sound of your old friend’s name, you miss her so much, but-
“Y’know the cops gave up on ya a while ago, babe. Don’t know why the bitch is still sniffin’ around,” he says with a sigh, shaking his head.  
She was the first person you rang when you found out you got the position at Onigiri Miya, giddy from excitement about finally landing a job near your brand spankin’ new apartment. And when you realised the burgeoning crush you were developing on your handsome boss, she was the one you gushed to, the two of you giggling into the phone like you were nothing but teenagers back in school. She’s your person, your best friend, the one you could turn to for anything (like ‘come help me hide a dead body’ anything).
The police could write you off as a cold case, shove your missing persons file in the back of some cabinet to gather dust while they moved onto somebody they could actually help, but Misako never would.
And by the vicious glint in Atsumu’s eye, that was something that should make you very, very afraid. “But S-Samu got rid of her right? She doesn’t know anythi-”
The knife digs in, cutting you off with a sharp hiss. The both of you watch as a thin line of blood beads to the surface, and Atsumu grins.
“Maybe yer right,” he muses. “But ya shoulda heard the way she kept goin’ on and on about it. She seems real worried about ya, babe. Kinda made me a little mad, if I’m bein’ honest.”
The silence between the two of you is deafening. You wonder if he can hear the way your heart’s thumping erratically in your chest, if he can sense the tightness in your throat as you force yourself to swallow your panic down before it can sweep you away entirely. He’s toying with you, you know he is - like a cat batting around a half dead mouse it has no intention of eating.
“Atsumu…” it’s little more than a whisper, hoarse and desperate, but it makes his grin widen nonetheless.
The knife in his hand stills, and carelessly he tosses down on the mattress beside you, hand moving to grip at your thigh. His thumb sweeps across the shallow cut, smearing your blood over his finger before he brings it to his parted lips, pink tongue darting out to lick at the bloodstained digit. 
He hums, eyes falling closed for a split second as something akin to contentment graces his face. He looks beautiful like that, smiling dreamily, even under the jarring fluorescent basement light. You wonder sometimes how you could have been so blind to the monster lurking beneath his skin, but when looks like that, when he smiles - you remember the way your heart sped up, your cheeks warming as butterflies fitted about your stomach the first time you’d met him. He’s beautiful, unfairly so, but that beauty is nothing but a lure, and you were the one dumb enough to go chasing after it.
The bloody knife lying forgotten on the bed between you two draws your attention, daring you to reach out and take it. Atsumu’s momentarily distracted, you could try it. You might even be quick enough to snatch it away from him before he realises what you’re doing and tries to fight you for it. He’d win, you know he would. He’s strong, but you could be fast… 
Your hand twitches restlessly, breath catching in your throat-
Atsumu isn’t that careless, and it’s a game you’ve played before.
(Played before and lost.)
The moment passes, and those dark, soulless eyes flicker open. “I’ve still got yer phone upstairs. Why don’t I put yer friend’s mind at ease, let her know we’re takin’ such good care of you, hm?”
You don’t say a word, staring at him in mute horror.
“Better yet, I could go tell her in person. Whad’ya think, sweetheart?” His hand comes up to cup your face, his thumb stroking your cheek in a mockery of tender affection. “I just hate the thought of somebody else wastin’ so much energy worrying about my pretty girl.”
You think of Misako, the first time you met her and the easy, careless way she gave her love to anybody who took more than a moment to look past the tough exterior she hid herself behind. She’s sweet and good and the thought of her alone in a room with a monster like Atsumu makes your blood run cold.
“Please, Tsumu, don’t-”
He grabs at your jaw, squeezing your cheeks until the pain of it forces you silent with a whimper.
“Convince me,” he purrs.
“W-what?”
“If you don’t want me to go find that fuckin’ nosy bitch and carve ‘er up like a Halloween pumpkin…” his smirk widens and your stomach plummets, “convince me not to.”
Your eyes dart down to Atsumu’s knife. 
You know better.
You’ve tried this before.
(It doesn’t end well for you.)
But in your blind panic, none of that matters. You just act on instinct, and grab-
Fingers snatch at your wrist the moment your hand wraps around the handle, squeezing mercilessly until it feels like the fragile bones in your wrist are going to break and you let go, the knife clattering back onto the bed.
Atsumu laughs - laughs - and picks it back up, flipping and catching the blade with practiced ease, “Not what I had in mind, baby, but hey, if you wanna play like that…” he trails off with that lazy, half cocked smirk that makes your blood boil.
“I hope you choke and die, you sadistic fucking bastard!”
The words slip out before you can hope to stop them, and your breath catches in a horrified gasp as his eyes widen. It’s been a long time since you lashed out, even longer still since you lashed out with Atsumu. 
But instead of the swift backhanded slap you brace yourself for, he beams at you with wicked delight. 
It’s infinitely worse.
“Now there’s that lovely spark I’ve been missin’!” 
He seizes you by the back of your neck before you have a chance to backpedal, dragging you into a kiss. As his tongue invades your mouth, and the knife in his other hand drags a slow trail up between your breasts to come to a rest on the delicate skin of your throat, you wonder if the lingering coppery tang you can taste on him is really there, or if it’s all in your head. 
“Now, why don’t you suck on my cock instead, and we’ll see how generous I’m feelin’ when yer done?”
He doesn’t give you so much as a beat to respond, dragging you both to the edge of the bed and tossing you carelessly to the ground. It only takes him a moment to cast aside the knife to unbuckle his jeans and childishly kick them off, his boxers following a moment later. He grabs his cock, half hard, pre-cum beading at the flushed tip, and gives it a few cursory strokes, staring through lidded, hungry eyes.
The smirk written across his face reminds you all too much of the cat that got the canary, but as long fingers reach for your hair, stroking through the unruly locks for half a beat before tightening, yanking your head forward, you don’t fight him.
Not out of any fear for your life - no, in some sick, twisted way you know that he won’t hurt you too badly, would never go so far as to kill you - but it’s not your life that hangs in the balance. It’s not for your own sake that you open your mouth and let your tongue flick out, swirling around the weeping cock head, scooting forward to press a kiss to the tip. Diligently, you lap up the salty pre-cum - fighting back a shudder when he groans appreciatively - and swallow it down with a barely concealed grimace before falling back to sit on your thighs, keeping your gaze fixed on your lap.
You’ll do it - whatever he wants. Suck his cock, settle yourself down on his lap and ride him while playing with your tits, let him paint your face with his cum - whatever crude, degrading, awful things he asks, you’ll do if it means he won’t touch your friend. 
But you won’t pretend to enjoy it.
Far from being put out by your less than enthusiastic reception, Atsumu laughs again. “Aw, well look who’s decided to play nice after all,” he coos, his hand still fisting at your hair. “It’s cute, but I think I wanna see you choke on it, sweetheart.”
You barely have time to brace yourself on his thighs before he’s dragging your face toward his crotch once more. Atsumu is merciless as he forces you to swallow him down. He’s big, not just in length, but thick too. Your jaw aches from the stretch, and when he rams the back of your throat you gag, the muscles of your throat unwittingly tightening around his length.
Atsumu swears, his grip tightening painfully.
Tears burn in the corners of your eyes and you force yourself not to panic, to breathe through your nose, but it’s hard when you’re choking around his cock, your nose being forced against his navel as he bottoms out with a snarl and starts to fuck your face in earnest.
He snaps at you between breathless moans to play with his balls, and with trembling hands you comply. You try your best to end this quickly, dragging your tongue along the vein on the underside of his cock, hollowing out your cheeks and trying to relax your throat to take him better - but it’s easier said than done. The lewd, slick sounds of you gagging with every eager thrust echo out crudely in the basement around you, broken only by Atsumu’s moans, and the backhanded praise he showers you in.
“Fuck baby, look at you, swallowin’ it down like a good little whore. S’like you were made for this, suckin’ my cock. My pretty cock slut, so fuckin’ perfect for me, aren’tcha?”
Humiliation burns through you, but you force it down, will yourself not to break as his fingers card through your hair.
“You walkin’ through Samu’s door was the best goddamn thing that ever happened to us, ya know that, right?”
He says it with a breathless laugh, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that he truly believes it. Atsumu’s the monster that hides beneath the surface, the violent beast lurking patiently behind the easy charm and lazy smirk that drew you in - but he wants as his other half does.
His impulses, his desires - they’re a reflection. A magnification, you suppose. 
You wouldn’t be here otherwise, you wouldn’t still be alive.
Atsumu’s hips stutter, and a heady groan slips from between clenched teeth. He’s close, rutting into your warm, wet mouth with renewed vigour. 
It’s all you can do to clutch at his thighs as he fucks you desperately, chasing his high. You feel his muscles tense beneath your touch, his abs tightening as he grips you tightly by your hair and forces your head forwards, burying your face in his dark pubes and anchoring you in place.
He thrusts one final time, snarling as he gazes down at your wide, tear filled eyes and shoots his warm, thick load right down your throat.
You choke and splutter, falling to the floor the moment he releases you, heaving in desperate gasps of air as fresh tears mix with the drool and leftover cum coating your chin. It must make for a pathetic sight, but Atsumu just chuckles, dropping back onto his elbows with a grin and beckoning you forward with a single crooked finger.
“C’mon, sweetheart. You didn’t think we were done just yet, did ya?”
Your body aches, littered with bruises, blood, bite marks and cum - all remnants of Atsumu’s own brand of devotion - by the time he finally rolls off of you and collapses onto the mattress with a contented sigh.
For a moment neither of you move, your harsh pants as you try to catch your breath the only sound in the basement. The air’s thick with the scent of sex and sweat, of him (he smells like summer - citrus and the ocean while Osamu’s more spice and the woods, smoke and honey melding into one rich, intoxicating scent) choking you with every ragged inhale. He reaches for you, tugging you closer and draping a muscular arm across your waist - and you let him. You’re exhausted, aching and while you’ll do whatever you can to hide it from him, a hair's breadth away from shattering like fine china. 
 Atsumu whistles lowly, thumbing at the scar on your hip and pressing a surprisingly affectionate kiss against your hair. “God damn, babe. I really gotta threaten your friends more often if yer gonna let me fuck ya like that just to try an’ keep me distracted!”
You stiffen, blood running cold. “W-what?”
He chuckles, squeezing your middle once more, “Didn’t even need the knife to get’cha to play along. You must really care about savin’ that irritating little bitch.” 
Your pulse quickens, he has to be able to feel it with his bare chest pressed up against your back. His lips hover your ear, his warm breath fanning across your face, “But if I’m bein’ real honest with ya, darlin’, it does kinda piss me off. Can’t help but feel a little… jealous, I ‘spose. Yer still my girl, aint’cha?” he spits. “It’s just not right for you to be thinkin’ so much about somebody else when yer here with me.”
Fear wrenches at your heart, “No, please!” You’re scrambling to grab at the arm that’s already withdrawing as Atsumu pushes himself back up. “Don’t, you can’t-”
He silences you with a kiss, squeezing your jaw and patting your cheek twice when he draws back. Amusement, cruel and vindictive, dances in those pitiless depths as he reaches around you to grab his abandoned blade, waving it tauntingly in front of your face. “Can’t forget this now, can we?”
“No, I’ll do anything! Atsumu please!” 
You’ll beg on your hands and fucking knees if you have to. You can’t let him hurt her.
You can’t.
And for a single beat, he stares at you, and you swear you see a flash of something other flicker across his face.
You blink and it’s gone, and even that cheap glee is stripped bare, leaving nothing but resentment, cold and burning as he appraises you. His fingers twitch, as if he’s tempted to reach for you, to tuck the stray lock of hair that’s fallen across your face back behind your ear or brush away the silvery tear tracks that mar your soft cheeks.
But he doesn’t. He only sighs. “Don’tcha see, baby? That’s the problem.”
He doesn’t say another word as he moves off the bed, bending over to pick up his discarded jeans and tee as he passes. It takes a second for his words - the realisation - to kick in, but when they do it feels like you’ve been doused in ice water, shocking every cell in your body. You leap after him, uncaring of your own nakedness, forgetting about the shackle that keeps you from running too far.
You slip when it pulls taut, bare knees scraping against the concrete floors as you scramble to right yourself. He doesn’t stop as you beg and plead through hoarse sobs.
You can’t let him hurt her, you can’t let him hurt her, you can’t, you can’t, you can’t!
The chain has no more give and he’s already at halfway up the basement steps.
“Osamu! Osamu please!!” You shriek, tugging frantically at the thick lock wrapped around your ankle. “You promised! OSAMU!!”
He pauses at the top of the stairs, his shoulders straightening as he glances back and shrugs. “Sorry, darlin’. Samu ain’t the one drivin’ tonight.”
The heavy door slams shut behind him, your desperate screams falling silent in his wake.
He’s the one who comes back to you hours later, his dark clothes filthy and torn, the dried blood smeared across his jaw contrasting sharply with his pale, unblemished skin. Impassive grey eyes give nothing away as he slowly makes his way down the basement steps towards you. 
Frozen, your heart pounding in your throat, you can’t seem to make a sound as he unzips his hoodie and shrugs it off, tossing it over the bannister without so much as breaking eye contact. His arms, toned and lean, are covered in claw like scratches, his neck too and there’s blood under his fingernails, splattered across his ripped tee. 
You try not to think about what that means. 
Atsumu’s a killer, you know that, but that doesn’t necessarily-
“‘M sorry,” he murmurs. “I tried ta keep him in check…”
The rest of his sentence fades into white noise.
He killed Misako.
He killed her.
Phantom claws tighten around your chest, squeezing, and for a moment it feels like you can’t breathe, it’s just pain. Raw, jagged, agony that tears and bites and consumes every ounce of you - and you don’t even realise that you’re sobbing, wailing, until Osamu’s kneeling down on the bed beside you, sweeping you up into his arms.
Apologies flow from his lips, washing over you like sea-foam on the shore. He kisses you fervently - your lips, your cheeks, your hair, again and again murmuring excuses, justifications, cradling your trembling form against him. 
He likes to pretend that he’s blameless in all of this. That Atsumu’s the monster here and he’s the good one, the loving partner who only wants to keep you safe and tucked away from the rest of the world. And if that means chaining you to a bed in the basement of his house and treating you like a glorified fuck toy - so be it. 
It’s easy for him to forget that Atsumu might be a beast unto himself, but Samu’s the one who lets him out in the first place
Osamu wanted you, so Atsumu took you. 
Samu felt threatened, so he let Tsumu take care of the problem. 
You have a sneaking suspicion that Osamu isn’t nearly as powerless over his counterpart as he’d like for you to believe. After all, he’s the one who ends up reaping the rewards when Atsumu comes out to play.
762 notes · View notes
rosepetalgold · 2 years
Text
strike me down (i won't fall forever) 1
Summary: After a brutal encounter with Wrath, an injured Janus makes a desperate bid for safety and finds himself in what might just be an even worse situation.
Relationships: None
Warnings: Hunger, physical assault and implied past/recurring physical abuse, head trauma, threat of murder (no actual murder); unsympathetic Wrath
Word count: 3723
Notes: Set sometime after Accepting Anxiety. There are no graphic depictions of violence but please mind the warnings and stay safe, y'all. LMK if anything else should be tagged/warned for.
Read on Ao3 Masterpost
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Part 1 (you're here) | Part 2 | Part 3
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Janus shouldn’t have ever left his room.
He knew that, he knew he should have just stayed inside the safety of his own four walls until things had settled in the rest of the Dark Side, until Wrath and his cronies had calmed slightly from whatever had happened to set them off this time.
But he’d run out of his emergency supply of food days ago after rationing what little he had left, his stash already depleted from helping Remus a few weeks ago. Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He should have made time to restock, snuck out in the middle of the night, bribed one of the lesser sides to bring him supplies, done something – anything – possible to make sure he didn’t run out of food.
But he had.
Some embodiment of self-preservation he was.
He’d waited as long as he could, at least, until he was so hungry he felt empty and aching and hollow, as if he had withered into nothing more than a husk of a person, someone who could be blown over in a cool summer breeze. Even then, with his stomach cramping and his head pounding, he’d waited some more, until the constant background of muffled thuds and shrieks that underpinned life on the Dark Side had quieted somewhat and the dark of night had tipped over into dawn, when Wrath would hopefully be headed to bed.
Of course, hopefully had been the operative word, and never once in his life had fate decided to place Janus on the favorable side of hopefully.
He didn’t know how Wrath had known he’d emerged to scrounge for food. Maybe Janus had been too loud in accidentally brushing a hand against a bag of chips, or maybe one of the other sides had reported his location back to Wrath, or maybe it had been just plain dumb bad luck that the vengeful side had happened to pass by and catch a glimpse of him.
What Janus did know was that he hadn’t stood a chance against Wrath. He’d tried, of course, because he wasn’t about to go down without a fight, but Wrath had just laughed as he’d swatted Janus’ staff away, the wood clattering to the tile well out of Janus’ reach, his eyes glinting with savage excitement at the prospect of an easy victim.
Janus had known from that look alone that nothing pleasant could follow, and he’d been right. The beating had been vicious, like it always was, Wrath taking advantage of Janus’ shorter stature and underweight condition to throw him into appliances and counters and the table indiscriminately until Janus had finally crumpled to the floor, the room spinning around him as he’d tried to curl into the most protective ball possible and weather the blows raining down upon him.
Like he said, he should have just stayed in his damn room.
And then, just as suddenly as they had started, the blows stop. Janus dares to crack an eye open and peer out from underneath his arm to find Wrath looming over him, foot drawn back for another kick to Janus’ ribs, but the rageful side has his head cocked towards the hallway, as if his attention has been caught by some noise Janus has missed.
“Who’s there?” he calls, and even in his current state Janus has to resist the urge to roll his eyes. Honestly. As if whoever it was is going to announce themself and come prancing out to join Janus in being beaten half to death.
Silence for a long moment, and Janus is bracing himself for Wrath to resume his assault when there’s a small thump and a skittering sound from the hall.
“Stay here, you lying freak,” Wrath growls at Janus, pressing his boot hard on the side of Janus’ head for emphasis, smashing Janus’ cheek into the cold tile, and then he’s gone, disappearing down the shadows of the hallway in search of another plaything.
Janus takes a moment to take stock of the situation, forcing his brain to try and follow a logical line of thought despite the dizzying rush of pain and adrenaline overwhelming his synapses. Or maybe that was just the head trauma. Probably both, actually, given how everything has gone slightly blurry. Remus would be able to tell him which it was. He had become surprisingly – heartbreakingly, really – adept at triaging injuries over the years of their alliance.
No, he has to focus. There’ll be time for evaluating the severity of his injuries later if he can get himself somewhere halfway safe.
It’s possible that Wrath leaving is some kind of trick, a ruse to see if Janus will try and make a break for it, a setup to use Janus’ disobedience as an excuse to subject him to something far worse than a garden-variety beating.
But, really, Janus doubts whether Wrath is that smart when his solution to any given problem was to hit it until it stopped being a problem. And even if it isn’t a trick and Janus follows Wrath’s instructions to stay where he is, he knows from unfortunate experience that the other side isn’t going to show him any mercy for obeying instructions. So if his options are to try and make a break for it and potentially get caught and punished or to stay where he is and certainly endure the rest of Wrath’s beating until he gets bored, he’s going to opt for the choice that gives him a chance to get away with minimal additional injury.
Keeping his gaze glued to the hallway in case Wrath comes back from investigating the source of the noise, Janus rolls onto his hands and knees and uses a nearby chair to heave himself upright on unsteady legs, stifling a hiss of pain and grimacing at the sticky residue coating the piece of furniture. The world spins dangerously and he has to close his eyes for a moment to keep the bile in his stomach where it belongs, clutching onto the chair so hard his nails bite slightly into the wood.
He needs to get himself together. He has to go now if he wants any chance of making an escape. He’ll be okay if he can just make it to his room, he tells himself, ignoring the way his own lie makes the sharp taste of bitter citrus burst across his tongue. He just needs to make it back to his domain and his body will start to heal, blue-bruised skin blending back into flesh-tones and broken bones knitting themselves back together and damaged brain cells reverting back into functioning ones. His injuries surely aren’t bad enough that he won’t be able to recover and he’ll have to go through the excruciating process of recorporating cell by cell. Nope. Definitely not.
He ignores, too, the fact nagging in the back of his mind that he’s failed what he set out to accomplish in the first place, that he hasn’t managed to collect any food and that even if he does make it back to his room he could very well starve to death before he’s strong enough to emerge to try and raid the kitchen again.
That was a problem for future Janus. Present Janus needed to get his ass moving before Wrath came back and tore him apart.
He takes a lurching step towards the hall at the other end of the kitchen, then another, and another. The world spins around him, everything cast in double for a moment, and the ground seems to be moving under his feet like he’s on a boat, but it gets easier once he has a little bit of momentum to carry him forward. As long as he doesn’t stop, he might be okay.
He stumbles up the dim hallway until it rounds the corner to become a long corridor of rooms, forcing himself to ignore the pain radiating through his whole body and go faster even as he staggers into the wall, surely adding another bruise to the ones already beginning to bloom across his skin. Fear is howling at him now, begging to take over completely lest Wrath find him – he’ll be so angry, so blindingly furious that Janus has disobeyed him, he’ll take Janus somewhere he can’t escape and put on those brass knuckles and hit and hit and hit until Janus is bruised and bloody and broken – and he stubbornly shoves it down. What a perfect time for fear to cloud his thoughts. Really, not inconvenient or counterproductive at all.
He makes his way on past the boarded-up door, the one bound with padlocks and chains, the one sinking into the wall. Sides he’s locked away permanently, those who would drive Thomas to madness just so they could exert some of their influence. His room isn’t much farther, then, should be just beyond the shadows up ahead, and yes, he can just make out a sliver of gold paint–
A cold laugh draws Janus up short, heart lurching into his throat, and almost against his will his gaze jerks up to find a figure at the far end of the hall, sinuous shadows coiling around his ankles.
Wrath.
For a moment, they just stare at each other, Janus not even breathing as the fear begins to squeeze around his ribs and into his lungs, choking off his oxygen. Then Wrath glances at Janus’ door between them and a cold grin spreads across his face, and Janus can only surmise they’ve come to the same conclusion: Janus won’t be able to make it to his door and the safety of his room before Wrath does.
Fuck.
A stronger side might try and take Wrath on. A braver side might make a final stand there in the hallways. A more respectable side might accept his fate and go out with a shred of dignity.
But Janus was Self-Preservation and self-preservation made him a coward and that’s all there was to it.
He turns tail and bolts.
Wrath screeches with delight behind him, the thud of his steel-toed boots echoing down the hallway after Janus as the other side gives chase. Janus forces himself to think as he hurtles away from the safety of his room. He’s too weak to sink out to his quarters or else he would already be there. He might be able to summon the energy to sink out to one of the common spaces like the kitchen or the living room, but there's no telling what other sides are currently lurking around there or whose side they’ll take, and besides, those will be the first places Wrath will check.
His only other option is this physical chase around the mindscape with the desperate hope that he can gain enough ground in this game of cat-and-mouse to find a place to hide until he’s strong enough to sink back into his room, and judging from how his ribs are already sending stabbing pain through his chest and black spots have begun to dance in front of his vision, he doesn’t bet that’s a game he’ll be able to win.
Wait. No, not his only other option. He has one thing Wrath doesn’t, one favor he can call in and deal with the repercussions later.
Swearing viciously under his breath, he veers sharply into one of the many branches off the main corridor into a narrower hallway, the doors lining it mostly half-formed or glitching in and out of existence in a way that isn’t doing Janus’ already-compromised vision any favors. It’s a dead end, and Wrath whoops behind him, undoubtedly thinking that Janus has made a mistake and accidentally cornered himself. Janus careens down it to the very end, to a neon green door carved with all manner of curse words and rude anatomy and various other inappropriate graffiti.
“Remus,” he tries to shout as he stumbles to a halt and bangs on the door with his fist, but his voice comes out a hoarse wheeze, his lungs feeling like they’re about to split clean open.
“Remus!” he tries again, and this time it comes out as an unintelligible tangle of sounds, the letters all mushing together in his mouth and garbled by an underlying hiss.
He dares a glance over his shoulder to find Wrath approaching, his pace slowed to a leisurely stalk, anticipation glinting in his eyes as he summons a baseball bat into one hand. Janus doesn’t try shouting again but this time closes his eyes and reaches out mentally to the room in front of him, to the very essence of Remus, to creativity and chaos and cleverness, and pulls in a wordless summons, shouting please and help and you owe me down the invisible connection, hoping it’ll somehow be enough–
White-hot pain explodes through Janus’ head, overpowering and all-encompassing, and he can’t tell how much of it is from the failed summons and how much is from the bat Wrath has just cracked into his skull. It doesn’t matter. Either way, he crumples like a rag doll, falling sideways into a puddle of some dark, viscous liquid creeping out from under Remus’ door, and Janus knows with a horrible, sinking certainty that he’s lost.
Dead-end hallway, Remus either too weak or too smart to respond to Janus’ summons, no way out except through whatever torture Wrath is about to inflict upon him. All Janus has left is his silver tongue, and he’s well aware that he doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of talking or lying his way out of this one.
He braces himself for more blows, but Wrath is laughing, the sound as delighted as a child on Christmas morning, and when Janus glances up through the myriad of black and white and red spots dancing in his vision, he finds the other side stepping back, tossing the bat in his hand. Every time it meets his palm it shifts into a new weapon – a Bowie knife, a tire iron, brass knuckles, a garrote.
“Come on, Deceit. Don’t you want to play? I think it’s the least you can do since you’re a little bitch who doesn’t know how to obey orders. Maybe if you put up a good enough fight I’ll let you go this time.”
A lie, so obvious that Janus doesn’t even need to taste burnt lemons on the back of his tongue to know it. Wrath never voluntarily lets any of his victims go, no matter how hard they fight back or how desperately they plead for mercy.
Still, Janus refuses to go down without a fight, even if that fight is him taking a single swing at Wrath before the other side takes him apart piece by piece. He plants a hand beneath him and shoves himself upright on shaking legs as Wrath’s expression turns ferally gleeful at the prospect of imminent violence.
“Fuck you,” Janus rasps, drawing himself up as straight as possible even as the movement pulls sharply at his likely-broken ribs and bruised organs. The black spots are returning in force, his body protesting vehemently at the sudden change in position, and he wavers on his feet, blindly clutching Remus’ doorknob for support.
A doorknob that turns easily under his hand, the door swinging open with a soft click.
For a single, suspended moment, both Wrath and Janus simply stare at the neon green wood, apparently equally taken aback by this unexpected development, and then adrenaline is surging through Janus’ veins to move hide get away find safety and he’s lunging through the door, barely managing to get himself inside before he’s whirling and slamming it shut, shaking fingers twisting the lock into place.
He turns, expecting to find Remus waiting for him on the other side of the threshold, and something jerks harshly around his neck. Panic screams through him at the thought that he wasn’t fast enough, that Wrath has made it inside as well and is choking him to death, but when his fingers scrabble at his throat they find soft fabric, not a human arm or the cold, hard line of a garrote wire. His cape, he realizes after a moment; it’s gotten caught in the door in his rush to get inside and he is effectively choking himself as he tries to pull away.
A scream of unfiltered rage splits the air entirely too close to Janus’ ear and he flinches as something slams into the door, his fingers fumbling on the knot of his cape.
“You think you can hide from me, you lying piece of shit?” Wrath roars. All the amusement is gone from his voice, leaving nothing but pure, unadulterated fury. “You think that disgusting excuse for Creativity will protect you?” Another thud too close for comfort. “I’ll fucking kill both of you.”
Janus finally rips the knot free and steps forward, letting the garment flutter down behind him and ignoring the little stab of grief that makes it through the adrenaline at the thought of losing the cape, as close to a comfort item as he would allow himself, its small, purple plaid patches on the inner lining a constant reminder of the side who’d managed to leave the Dark Side – and Janus – behind for good.
Suck it up, he snarls to himself. You can make another cape. You can’t make another skull if you open the door to get the cape and Wrath bashes your brains in with a crowbar.
He scans the room, searching for Remus’ familiar black and green costume, for the other side lying on the floor or sprawled on the bed or collapsed in the ensuite’s bathtub, too weak to answer Janus’ summons or the door, but there’s nothing. The room is entirely empty and eerily quiet in a way Dark Creativity’s domain should never be. He frowns and takes a step forward, raking his gaze across the space again as though he may have missed the gangly side, because surely if Janus has been allowed into Remus’ room then Remus himself has to be here somewhere, but still he spies no trace of the Duke.
Another thud from the door, accompanied by more of Wrath’s ranting, and Janus tries to tune it out and wrangle his erratic breathing under control. Wrath can’t get into another side’s room when it’s locked, he reasons with himself; Janus is safe here, even if Remus is nowhere to be found.
He’s no sooner thought it then the air is rent with the sickening sound of splintering wood behind him. He whirls, shot nerves ratcheting back up to high alert, and is met with the sight of the head of a hatchet buried in Remus’ door. As he watches, horror creeping slow and steady up his spine, a sharp contrast to the dizzying rush of even more adrenaline flooding his veins, the weapon is wrenched free, and there’s a single moment of silence before it’s crashing back down again, wood fragmenting enough for Janus to catch a glimpse of Wrath’s twisted face.
No.
No no no, this shouldn’t be happening. This can’t be happening. He’s in Remus’ room and the door is locked. Wrath shouldn’t be able to get inside no matter how hard he tries. Janus is safe, he’s supposed to be safe, how– what–
What little control Janus has gained over himself in the minute since he’s entered Remus’ room evaporates as all-consuming, mind-numbing panic comes roaring back, brain shutting down to all but its most basic instinct of survive. He stumbles back, scanning the room wildly for some kind of weapon (it is Remus’ room, after all; weapons should be a dime a dozen), anything to defend himself with when Wrath inevitably breaks the door down.
The hatchet crashes down again, the top of the door beginning to splinter apart in earnest now, and just as Janus’ fingers close around the hilt of a sword abandoned atop the dresser, another door flickers to life in the corner, sleek and black with Remus’ insignia glowing bright green in the center of the wood, a red symbol barely visible underneath it.
The door to the Imagination.
He has neither the time nor the higher thinking skills at the moment to question why it has appeared or whether it has anything to do with him intruding on Remus’ space. One final blow to the bedroom door and it shatters, wood shards flying out like so much shrapnel, and Janus has only a fraction of a second to meet Wrath’s bloodthirsty gaze before he’s lunging towards the black door, his only possible escape, not giving a single shit what awaits him on the other side as long as it gets him away from the lethal fate that he’s sure to suffer at Wrath’s hands.
He feels a rush of air across the side of his face as something silver blurs past, entirely too close, and the earsplitting shattering of glass a heartbeat later informs him that Wrath has thrown his hatchet at Janus’ skull and just barely missed. It’s only a momentary reprieve at best, but if the other side is stupid enough to leave himself even temporarily without a weapon, Janus isn’t about to complain at a little near-death experience.
Wrath howls in rage at his failure as Janus barrels through the black door, pivoting on his heel and scrabbling at the wood to get it closed before Wrath can follow him, nothing but panic and adrenaline and acrid fear whiting out his mind as he stumbles over his own feet in retreat, raising the sword in a trembling hand as he prepares to defend himself.
A dull thud from the other side and the door shudders, knob beginning to twist, and this is it, Wrath is going to burst through the door with a weapon in his hand and murder in his eyes and he’s going to overpower Janus, sword or no, and finish what he started–
And then just as it had appeared, the door winks neatly out of existence, leaving nothing but a faint halo image of where it had been. Even that fades after a few seconds, taking with it any evidence there had ever been anything there at all, and then it’s gone entirely, leaving Janus shaking, injured, and alone on the dark side of the Imagination.
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thetorturerwrites · 4 years
Text
Bucket
Snippet:  You were little more than a thrumming nerve. Your entire body throbbed inside your suddenly itchy sweater and leggings, aching and ready for him to do whatever it was he would do. That was the entire nature of your relationship with Adam. He told you what he wanted, and you delivered.
Notes: I wasn't sure I was going to post this because it is different from my regular Sackler, but I need to get it out of my brain. As always, this is an adult work, and there's not a lot about me that's fluffy. So, please be aware. Also, this is all the way behind the cut because it is just straight porn, y'all.
“Fuck, that’s it.”
Adam’s strong hands wrapped around your skull entirely. His fingers dug into your scalp, guiding you up and down again and again. He grunted at your whimper; the sound clipped by the stab of his dick against your uvula. Every salacious sound boomed in the empty theater.
On your knees between his, you clutched at his corded, jean-clad thighs, but the smooth fabric thwarted your every effort at keeping your balance. You slid against the stage's hardwood floor, only contained by his manipulative grip and his boots at the outsides of your thighs.
For the last half hour, Adam used your mouth to edge himself. He inched right up to the line where you’d taste that salty desire dribble out; and then, he’d back off, slapping his dick at the flat of your tongue with a lewd groan or allowing you to lick at the distended veins decorating his cock and wiggle your tongue tip into his weeping slit.
He was all you could smell, all you could taste. When he allowed it, musk and sweat tainted the air you breathed. You lapped at the tangy underside and head of his dick, swirling the slick around and around before swallowing it down on a delirious sigh.
Cock drunk from the first drop.
The longer he fucked your mouth, the more it swelled and numbed, and the natural apprehension of your throat to keep invaders out grew lax. That’s what he wanted. That was the goal — to park his massive dick into your throat as far as he could and cum down it.
His phone alarm blared, signaling the impending start of the next rehearsal.  He responded with an annoyed kick to send it skittering across the floor.
“Goddammit.” He tangled his fingers in roughly, jerking you back to the tip. He yanked his black t-shirt up and out of the way, baring that mouth-watering abdomen. “Hands.”
You were little more than a thrumming nerve. Your entire body throbbed inside your suddenly itchy sweater and leggings, aching and ready for him to do whatever it was he would do. That was the entire nature of your relationship with Adam. He told you what he wanted, and you delivered.
Blow job in the middle of the day, the park, the cab? Often. Pictures of your tits at three in the morning so he could jerk off when everyone else in the apartment was asleep? Check. Dirty bar bathroom fucking while his narcissist girlfriend waited? Of course.
He used you — however, whenever, wherever he wanted.
You reveled in it, in being his on-demand whore. Often, he didn’t care if you enjoyed it. He never worried about making you cum or being nice. You were at his disposal for every vicious fuck, for every lascivious, law-breaking adventure.
You picked up where his idiotic girlfriends left off.
And now? Now, you obeyed for the hundredth time, wrapped both hands around his straining, heated cock, and used them in tandem with your mouth, twisting and tugging. His arousal and the spit he coaxed from the back of your tongue combined to make every pass glide easily. Each obscene slurp and shuck echoed, a sinful chorus your heart beat in rhythm to. He moaned loud as you massaged and drooled and swallowed.  
The sounds he made had you rocking pitifully against nothing. Pins and needles shot through your calves and feet. Your quads burned; your head swam. But your breasts were heavy with arousal, nipples erect in that way that made you want to beg him to lick and suck them. Your pussy clamored, banging an intense, unrelenting tempo and soaking through the paltry fabric between your thighs.
“Think about this goddamn mouth more than I should.” He huffed and squirmed, unable to decide between the combination of lips and hands or the invitation at the back of your neck. “Can’t get Hannah to give a decent blow job to save my life. Shit, fuck, right there.”
You purred at his words and concentrated harder on relaxing your jaw and swiping your tongue along his length in response. This was the only praise you ever received from Adam — this comparison to whomever he was dating.
Clutching at your head, he forced you down, down, down until your nose nudged his groin and your throat, abused and beaten into submission, accepted his barrage. He growled and thrust in, pushy and pleased with himself.  He interrupted each gag with a new spearing of his cock. Barking another curse, Adam lodged himself so far into your throat he blocked your air supply and spilled straight into your gullet, denying you even the taste.
He was demanding, depraved, delectable.
He held you there a long time, until your fingers eased and your shoulders slumped with imminent unconsciousness. When he finally vacated your mouth, he held you upright by the throat as your brain came back into itself. He waited until you blinked bleary eyes at him and licked your swollen, cracked lips.
Pulling away, you took a dizzy moment to adjust your clothes sluggishly. You wiped the sticky spit from your face and nodded once, the only sign he ever asked for that you weren’t going to die or press charges.
He jerked his head towards the back door and grabbed his script from the floor.
“Get the fuck outta here.”
***
AS: Carmine’s. 15. Y: N. Too far. 30. AS: Fine.
Twenty-five minutes later, you strolled through the Italian restaurant’s door and paused at the attendant’s booth.  You were here to meet someone, you said, breezing by her with a smile as you had a dozen times before. For all she knew, you were a regular paying customer, not a booty call who was about to corrupt some recently cleaned surface.
Pointing yourself toward the restrooms, you hummed and strolled through the bustling room. You caught sight of Adam seated at an over-crowded table, surrounded by half-drunk, too loud people he looked close to murdering.
The scowl on his face promised any number of sinful things.
As soon as he caught your eye, you ducked down the dim hallway and into the ladies’ room to wait. Carmine’s was one of his favorite spots because of this particular bathroom — single occupancy, thick door, sturdy lock.
Minutes later, tall, dark, and menacing stepped in, slammed the door, and threw the lock into place. Hands on his hips, he leveled that annoyed gaze at you. Your breath hitched; your mouth watered. Slowly, deliberately, his eyes roamed from your favorite pair of come-fuck-me boots, along shapely curves accentuated by black skinny jeans. He lingered at the low swoop of your blouse and the rich plum coloring your full lips.
Somehow, his gaze darkened even further.
“You on a fucking date?”
He closed the distance in two irritated strides, prompting you to stand up straighter. Adam’s left hand pulled you in by your ass, squeezing and lifting you against him. His right found your breast to graze and swipe his thumb back and forth over the straining nipple. The lace bralette you wore left nothing to chance. You felt every nudge of the stiff peak side to side, sending electric current straight to your clit.
“Are you?” You met his eyes, a dare and a plea all wrapped up in one look. “You don’t care.”
Honey-gold eyes narrowed at you. Lush, pink lips hard lined. The hand at your breast lifted to your face and smeared the pretty lipstick all across your cheek, lending an air of just-fucked to your as yet unfucked appearance. You were loose for him from the first text, before you even walked in the door, but the sound he made melted your insides.
“You’re right.” Adam spun you to face the mirror and tore at your pants, nearly ripping the button clean off. “Don’t give a damn.”
Shoving the fabric down your hips, he impatiently tore your panties, pushed you further up onto the little counter, and dipped his fingers into the well at your core.
“Always ready for me, huh bucket?”
Your head dropped on a hushed groan at the pet name. Bucket. Short for Cum Bucket — his own personal sperm bank.
You didn’t need to answer; the evidence was clear. And before you could even plan the words, the fat head of his cock pushed past your puffy labia and broke the jellied seal on your cunt. You bit your lip hard to keep the whining noise from turning loud as he stretched you. It burned so goddamn good, and you lifted onto your toes for even an inch more.
Warm-up over, Adam gripped both of your hips and slammed forward punishingly. The force of it was so great, your mouth popped open on a hiccup, something between a delighted cry and a punch to the chest. Stunned, you planted your clammy hand on the mirror for some support, but he held you in place. His wide, determined hands kept your body right where he wanted it.
His pace was brutal. Hips pistoning, fingers digging in, teeth bared. All take and no give, he leaned further into you, pressing your abdomen against the marble counter so hard you knew there would be bruises. Each pass was frenzied, and the only thing that muffled the slap of his body against yours was the fact that the bathroom was next door to the kitchen.
The smell of sex mingled with spice and bread, coaxing a gurgle from your stomach. Starved in more ways than one, you arched your back and tipped your ass up further, earning a pleasured grunt from behind.
You knew the drill, and you held your breath. He hardly wanted to hear your sounds, often because he was muttering angrily or cursing at whatever bullshit happened over the course of the day. Your wailing was distracting, annoying, he said. You screwed your eyes shut to keep from watching him fuck you in the mirror, certain that you wouldn’t be able to keep quiet if you did.
But a whimper escaped, and you clawed at the sink. It was too much, too fucking good to bear in silence no matter how hard you tried.
His panting and grunting was music, and you pictured every shiny, veiny inch disappearing into your sizzling cunt. He didn’t care if you came, but he could drive you there, drive you crazy, the way he bottomed out, the way his sheer size filled you into your guts, the way he pushed and pulled and moved you to his liking.
Fucking you like this, in the bathroom of such a fine family establishment, was vulgar, disrespectful. His girlfriend and her friends were right outside, drinking and carrying on, but he was in here with you, hollowing out your pussy for his freight train cock.
It was mean and rude and shameful.
Addicting.
Something changed this time, though. You hurtled fast towards the kind of blinding orgasm only Adam could deliver, struggling to keep your mouth shut as you did, when his firm hand wrapped around your neck and lifted your back into his chest. He tightened his grip and hissed in your ear.
“Open your eyes. You think some suit can fuck you like this?”
The sight that met your peeking was carnal candy. His face was flushed and right at your ear. Your mouth hung open, letting strangled sounds of pleasure squeak free. He buried his dick far, far, far into your cunt and gripped the soft swell of your stomach for leverage. His fingernails dug in, and you could do nothing but brace, hold on, quake.
“Some college frat asshole gonna make you cum like I do? You know you want to. Almost there aren’t you, bucket? You think I don’t know when you cum?”
That was it. That’s all it took to send you reeling. Your body lit up, constricting around the angry cock inside and pulling a volley of curses from its owner. A long, muted ‘ffffffuck’ dripped from your lips right before the rest of you followed, shaking through the orgasm and the hot flood of slick that accompanied it.
It was liquid fire leaking down your thighs for him, a delicious loosening of every muscle to draw him in even further, and he rewarded you with a loud groan and a vicious bite to the shoulder.
He fucked you through your high mercilessly, never stopping the rough, quick pace. Pushing your torso away, he wrapped his hands back around your hips and furiously crashed into you until he snarled and emptied his cock, painting your insides with a fresh coat of Adam.
He was right.  Nobody could fuck you like that.
Slumping against the mirror, you mewled at the cool press of the glass, grateful for the temperature change. You bit your lip as he pulled out, already feeling empty in the wake of his use. Managing to make your legs work, you pulled your clothes back into place and reached to turn on the faucet so you could wash away the mussed make-up, but he caught your hand and turned you to face him.
He tipped your face up by fingers at your chin.
“Fucking tramp is what you are.” His voice dropped, and it seemed like almost a muse to himself, something you weren’t supposed to hear. “Never prettier than when you’re crying and filled with cum.”
Your brow furrowed, lost in this moment because you didn’t know what to do if he was praising you without comparing you to Hannah or whoever it was today. You could count the times he looked you right in the face on one hand, and you looked away, not wanting to go down the rabbit hole of how beautiful he was.
“Wear it like this. Show everybody what kind of whore you are.”
He dipped his head, bit your cheek, and spun out of the room. You mashed your lips together and took another long moment to get all of your shit back together. Slipping out, you tucked your hands into your jacket pockets and slithered through the crowd towards the door.
“Miss?  Hey shit, are you ok?!?”
You knew what it looked like. He knew what it would look like, too; that was the point.  It looked like you’d been assaulted in the bathroom. And to explain the disheveled clothes, the messy hair and smeared make-up, you’d have to say no, I let this guy I know fuck me while you all ate ravioli. You’d have to say no, I wasn’t assaulted; I’m his tramp, his whore, his on-call cunt.
For a flash, you contemplated doing just that, mulling over how the words would sound, would taste on your tongue.
Deciding against it, you ignored the concern and tossed a brief look over your shoulder to your at-will tormentor before disappearing out into the street.
***
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
Rigid fingers encircled your upper arm, gouging at the tender flesh through your dress shirt as the body attached to those fingers yanked you backwards into the janitor’s closet. You shrieked, pushing at the human column who kept you pinned in the corner.
“You come when I ask you, that’s it. You don’t fucking follow me here with my girlfriend like some goddamn stalker.”
It took a full 30 seconds to register the person grousing at you.
“I know the rules, Adam.” You fished out your badge and held it up for him to see. “I work here.”
He seethed for another heartbeat, then another. It was almost as though he wanted to be angry at you, at something. He snatched the badge and looked from you to it and back again.
“Didn’t know dirty sluts could get regular jobs.”
“Pay me.” It was blunt, and it shot out of your mouth before you could think better of it. “Till then, a girl’s gotta eat.”
His hypnotic eyes flashed, and he licked his lips, taking a step closer to you. Swallowing to wet the wicked dryness of your throat, you scooted back until you hit the wall, clutching your bag between you and him. You weren’t sure you meant what you said, but it was too late to take it back.
He looked at you like he wanted to eat you, and your body rose to the very idea of his mouth between your thighs. And then you thought how much better your shift would be if he fucked you first. A sloppy, rough ride to get you through the day.
“Wha-” Clearing your throat, you forced yourself to look at his face and not lower to see if his dick was hard in those navy blue slacks. “What are you doing here, anyway?”
“Some bullshit writer thing.” He leaned into your personal space and licked up the salty bead of perspiration at your temple. “But now I’m thinking about stuffing your filthy cunt full of my dick.”
Your agreement with the notion must have played across your face because he shoved your badge in your mouth, turned you around, and pushed your cheek against the cold slab wall. His deft hands wasted no time in sending your black dress pants to pool around your ankles and tugging aside your panties.
No warning, no checking to see if you were ready. He did exactly as he said he would; he stuffed his hard length into you, stretching and tearing, making you bite down on the plastic card.
Your eyes stung, tears smudging mascara and eyeliner into a globby blur. You scratched at the wall and squirmed through the pain, but Adam didn’t miss the way your hips moved, the way your ass wiggled against his groin. It didn’t matter why or where; you would always be ready for him to fuck you. Even if it hurt.
“Nasty, eager, goddamn slut.”
It was fast, frenetic. He pounded you so hard your eyes crossed. The full scope of your relationship coalesced in this moment. He fucked you blazingly quick, only worried about himself, and you flailed like a rag doll, a whore toy for his amusement.
You whimpered, unable to stop the noise even though you knew it wasn’t welcome. You carved little white divots into your badge with the death grip you had on it. Adam growled behind his own gnashing teeth, pulled you down onto his dick good and deep, and spilled into your waiting cavern. In a matter of two minutes, he finished with you and left.
It had been some time since it was that fast. Your head swam, caught in the murky middle of euphoria that only you, only your body could get him to do that and the ache and pulse he always left you with, the edge you seldom got to drop over.
It was the worst, and best, sort of torment, a masochism that got you through day after day.
***
“What’s wrong?! Are you dead?!”
You shoved your earbuds in and answered the phone in a panic because nobody made phone calls these days, especially the person on the line.
“Not dead. Where are you?”
You sighed, relieved that Adam wasn’t injured but unsure if he had lost his mind. Phone calls were against the rules.
“Working. You still haven’t paid me.”
His laugh soothed your nerves a bit; and like always, you waited for him to tell you what he wanted.
“Are you fucking anybody else?”
The question surprised you. This entire conversation surprised you. None of this was normal behavior for Adam, who spent all this time telling you he only wanted your mouth, your pussy. You weren’t sure what this was, but you knew to your bones it had to be part of his game.
“Nope. Should I be?”
He released a heavy sigh, the sort where you’ve finally sat down after a long day. You pictured it; him stretched out and relaxed. You only ever saw him relax the brief bits of time it took him to put his clothes back on.
“Can’t say no, can I? Probably shouldn’t be fucking around with me, cheating all over the place.”
“I’m not the cheater.” You half hoped he could hear the sneer, his comment souring your gut. “You are. I’m just a single gal with terrible judgment who likes to get fucked.”
“Yeah, you do.” He chuckled again, abandoning the self-loathing for something else. “Do you touch yourself when you’re not with me, bucket?”
You chewed your lip until it hurt. Even the mention of that name, the dirty things he called you, set your insides to warming, skin to flushing.
“Ah... no.” You winced because this wasn’t the sort of conversation you imagined having with anybody. Your masturbatory habits weren’t exactly noteworthy. “No, I don’t.”
“Why?”
“It.. uh... it makes sex better.”
“You don’t always cum when I’m fucking you, though. What do you do then?”
You sighed in defeat because you would do whatever he wanted, tell him whatever he wanted.
“Wait. I just wait.”
“Why?”
“Fucking hell.” You rubbed at your flaming cheeks and forehead. “Because it hurts, alright? You happy? Why are we talking about this?”
“Don't pretend to be shy. I’ve fucked you all over the city. Tell me what hurts.”
You could hear it now, a quiet rustling, a shift of his body, the slight change of his breath. He was stroking himself; you were sure of it. The very idea emboldened you.
“Fine.” You huffed, exasperated, and tried to settle, pressing your back against the wall. “It's this ache that never gets better. Everything stays swollen, and there’s this throb that’s always there. Once I cum, that goes away, and I have to start all over.”
“So, you don’t like to cum?”
You pondered the question, tapping your fingers restlessly. The answer was simple, but you didn’t want to say it out loud.
“No, I do. If it's been weeks of that deprivation, the orgasms are pretty amazing, but the in between is sometimes better. It keeps the memories fresh when I’m alone.”
Which was always.
“Does it hurt right now? Are your tits sore? Pussy wet and aching from being empty?”
The stutter to his voice confirmed it; he definitely had his dick in his hand. You shifted on your stool, spreading your legs apart far enough to push your pussy down against it. If you arched your back a little, your shirt grazed your skin in such a teasing way.
“You’re thinking about my tits now?”
He grunted, cursed under his breath.
“Think about you all the time. Your mouth and how you drank my piss that night.” He groaned and shifted again. You could hear him fucking his fist now. “How you’ll fuck me anywhere I want. Your cunt and how tight it gets when you do cum. Feel like I could fuck you every day, and it wouldn’t be enough.”
Struck dumb, you blinked hard at your monitor, unable to tell if this was honesty or manipulation. Players always played the game.
“Adam...”
“Hnngfuck. You don’t say my name enough.”
“You don’t say my name at all!” The heavy moment lifted, and you laughed because there was a part of you that doubted he even knew your name. “You call me bucket.”
“Guh!” Short, choppy gasps wafted through the phone, conjuring all manner of salacious imagery and staining your panties. “Came in you three times that day. You were so fucking pretty on your knees for me.”
“You did.” You nodded at nothing, eyes not even focusing anymore. You didn’t think he remembered the times he spent with you, let alone the first time he called you by a pet name. “Twice in my mouth and once in my pussy.” 
You debated the next thing you wanted to say, not sure if it was even worth saying, but you jumped off the bridge. Terrible judgment. 
“I even bought a shirt that says bucket.”
This was bad. Catching feelings for Adam would be so easy and yet monumentally stupid. Luckily, reality stepped through the door and headed for your window.
“Customer. Gotta go, k Adam? Bye.”
Ripping out the ear buds, you shoved them, your phone, and everything that just happened away.
***
AS: Remember where I live? Y: Y AS: Stop ducking me AS: 6pm AS: Wear the shirt
You stalled at the door, unable to bring yourself to knock. This was risky, dangerous, and you knew you should turn right around and go home. Bringing your side piece into the home you shared with your partner was an all-around asshole move.
Yet, here you were.
He wasn’t wrong; you had been ducking him. That call was too close, filled with too much potential. So, you let it sit, went on dates and outings with your friends, spent a lot of time purposefully misplacing your phone. None of it was enough, not nearly enough to make you stop thinking about Adam. Or the way he fucked you.
But if you did this, you weren’t sure you’d recover.
Decision made, you spun on your heel, shaking your head no. Can’t do it. Won’t. He must have opened the door right at that moment because his big hand caught you around the wrist and tugged you to a stop.
“Hey, where the fuck are you going?”
You dared a look over your shoulder and found him standing in the doorway in a dark button up with the sleeves cuffed at his elbows, tattered blue jeans, and bare feet. Looking like the damn devil himself.
He didn’t see it the first time; so, you shook your head for his benefit, but you couldn’t say out loud that you were leaving.
He took that silence as invitation and pulled you towards the door, as though he didn’t have the magnetic pull of the sun himself. Back at the threshold, he hooked a finger under your chin, tipped your head back, and swept a feather-soft kiss across your mouth.
“Miss me?”
Your brain short-circuited, and you stared at him, unable to formulate any kind of response.
He’d never kissed you before.
One taste wasn’t enough for him, though, because he snatched up your face into both hands and laid a kiss on you that singed you to the very tips of your eyelashes. Those pillowy lips you’d only ever seen in a hard line moved against yours in the best way, and the satisfied sound he made blew through your resolve to leave.
He seemed to know the very second your tension somewhat eased. He hunched down, slid your arms around his neck, and lifted you onto your toes so he could walk you into the apartment. Slamming the door behind you, Adam leaned you into it for support and slid his knee between yours, pinning you right there.
You still weren’t certain what to do, and it kept your face tight, anxious. Something rumbled against your chest, tickling your nipples as he broke the kiss. Your brow knit, and you tried to focus on his face. Long fingers slid around your throat loosely, the thumb at your chin keeping your head tilted.
“Relax. Let me taste.”
He nipped at your jaw, tripping a shudder that rushed down your spine. The next pass he made at your mouth came with the tease of his tongue along the seam of your lips. Your chest seized; you clutched at his shirt and squirmed in his hold. And then, his tongue curled along yours, cinnamon sugar and Sriracha spice. You thought you might die; you certainly didn’t mean to whine the way you did, but it escaped before you could catch it.
“You’ve swallowed so much of my cum, I expected you to taste like me.” His raspy words smeared a trail down your throat as his hands slid up to find skin under the hem of your shirt. “The rest of you taste this good?”
Your instincts screamed that this all was taking too long. You never had this much time, and he was wasting it with kisses and pretty words he didn’t mean.
“You.. ah..” You pushed at his shoulders to get him to look at you. “You don’t have to say those things. We both know I’m a sure thing. So, maybe let’s skip that part, yeah?”
“You got somewhere to be?”
“No, but Ha--”
“Good.” He licked at the shell of your ear and curled his fingers into your ribs. “Cause I’m in the mood to wreck you.”
Adam slanted his mouth over yours once more, stealing any further objection. His kisses were hungry but unhurried, and he explored your mouth as though he had all the time in the world. He unbuttoned your jeans and slid his hands down beneath the waistband, cupping and kneading your ass, teasing at the edges of your panties.
Those fingers that mainly dug bruises into your hips dipped between your legs, sliding along the sticky fabric. He pressed open-mouthed kisses all along your jawline and neck, biting sexily beneath your earlobe. Your hips rocked against his caress of their own accord, your body starving for this kind of touch from this particular man. Dubious, you chewed the inside of your cheek to keep your erratic tongue in check. It was likely that if you got too loud, all of this would end.
“Stop doing that.” He tugged at your lower lip, watching the corner of your mouth quiver. “Wanna hear you.”
Caught in his confusing web, you glued your eyes to the ceiling. If you looked at him, those feelings you tried so hard to skirt would come barreling back.
“Adam... what is this?”
Finding his way into your panties, he slid his long fingers between your slippery labia and against your oft-neglected clit on a pleased purr. You choked on your own spit, fisted your hands into his shirt, and pushed at his shoulders on reflex.
“Something new.”
It was subtle, intimate, the way he stroked your pussy, and it pushed you right up to that cliff in no time flat. Shaking inside your skin, you dropped your head against his shoulder. For weeks now, you rode that line, the sharp edge of denial; and in only a few passes of Adam’s thick fingers, your body was ready to jump off.
“M’gonna.. shit.. Ad-am!”
A loud, pained groan ripped from your throat when he pulled his fingers away, dangling you right there on the verge of bliss. This was more in line with the man you knew. This cocky asshole who could play you like a violin.
“Noooo, not yet.” Hasty now, he pulled off your clothes, tossing hoodie, shoes, and jeans over his shoulder. Catching sight of your white tank with ‘bucket’ painted over your breasts in script, he paused, gaping. “That’s the best fucking thing ever.”
His hands were suddenly everywhere. Shoving your arms away, turning your face to his for voracious kisses, groping at your aching breasts underneath the shirt. He palmed and rubbed and tugged at your flushing tits, all while whispering in your ear how he wanted you to wear that shirt all the time, wanted to paint it with his cum.
When he pinched and rolled your nipples, a low tide of pleasure wracked your body, pitching you into a tremor. Your cunt contracted and twinged, bending you towards its tormentor on a strangled moan. You couldn’t help it; your body could only handle so much. Adam’s eyes flashed, dark and glittery. He said he always knew when you came, and it seemed he was right.
“Think we can do better than that, bucket.”
And then he was on his knees, pressing you into the wall by one hand at your stomach and tearing your panties out of the way with the other. His lips connected with your cunt on a loud moan, and your brain stopped working. Your knees buckled, unable to keep you steady as he lathed your sex and thighs with messy, slurping kisses.
“Adam,” the desperation in your voice was terrible. “Jesusfuckinghell.”
Your pitiful, pleading noises only made him double down. His kisses came rougher, harder, and he sucked your clit until you shouted. Tears pricked at your eyes, but all you could do was beg. Please don’t stop. Please don’t stop. Please don’t stop.
But of course, he stopped.
Flush against you, he trapped your trembling mouth to share your taste, grunting as you tangled tingling fingers into his hair to keep from buzzing right out of your body.
“Want you to crawl to my bed, bucket. Put that pretty cunt up so I can see.”
The world stopped. You blinked rapidly, feeling like someone had doused you with ice cold water. Pushing him away, you shook your head and tried to disentangle your limbs from his.
“Y-you want me to crawl,” your face dropped into a scowl, anger diffusing through your already heated chest and neck, “To Hannah’s bed?! Fuck you, Adam. No. That’s too much.”
He didn’t argue. Instead, he tugged you back into place beneath him and nudged your nose with his. He rubbed his thumb back and forth over your mouth until your gaze softened from fury to confusion.
“My bed.” His voice was soft, his eyes searching. “No more Hannah. Or Jessa. Or anybody.”
You blew out a long, uncertain breath, letting it lead right into the question. “... when?”
“The night you hung up on me. Couple hours after that.” He drew lazy circles on your hip with his fingertips. “Found out I got a part I really wanted after I talked to you, and you were the only person I wanted to celebrate with. Been trying to pin you down for weeks so I could tell you.”
Something new, he said. You looked up at him with wide, shining eyes, trying to decide if he was telling the truth.
“I want you around. When I wake up at three a.m. because I want to fuck you so bad. I wanna take you to new restaurants so we can cheapen up their bathrooms. Wanna call you bucket in public so people think I’m crazy. Think I owe you about a thousand orgasms, and I wanna give them to you.”
Twisting out of his hold, you shook your head. Unstable, fuzzy on your intention, you leaned against the couch while you slid your jeans and shoes back on. You looked everywhere but directly at Adam and dodged his hand when he reached for you.
“Can’t do this right now.”
With a crash of the door behind you, you ran out of the building with no particular direction other than away from him.
***
“Fuck, that’s it.”
You tangled your fingers in soft, raven locks and scratched at Adam’s scalp. That was your handle to guide him up and down, side to side. He hummed into your slick pussy, lapping and sucking so loud someone had to have heard.
On his knees at the little sink, he buried his face far between your thighs, nudging your clit with his nose and jostling it ever so slightly with each vulgar kiss, each smacking pop against your labia. Brushing his mouth and cheeks through the syrup shining on your skin, he murmured praises about how amazing you were, how good you tasted, what a filthy thing you were to spread your legs for him in this grimy bathroom. His words tumbled away with the spear of his tongue, replaced by your wanton whimpers. Gripping your legs to keep them apart, he tongue fucked you until the things coming out of your mouth made little sense.
Smacking his hands away, you tugged on his hair to draw Adam up to stand. He cupped your face and smothered you with a tart kiss. It was his turn to whimper as your fingers worked the belt and buttons of his pants, wiggling them open and down his hips.
“You’re sure?”
"Mhm. Debt paid." 
You bit at his swollen lips and nodded, untucking his heavy, hard dick and scooting to the edge of the sink. For weeks now, you treated Adam the way he had treated you for so long. You called him when you wanted to cum, and you put him on his knees wherever you were.
His lips, his tongue, his fingers — all worked every time you called, but you didn’t let him fuck you. And you didn’t return the favor.
All you could think about right this moment was getting his dick inside of you. You pinched a hot drop of want from his inflamed cock head and relished the needy groan that accompanied it. He hesitated, as though he didn’t want to ruin it; but finally, he lined himself up and struck, rocking his hips and shoving, shoving, shoving until he bottomed out.
He whined into your neck, gripping your hips in that possessive way you didn’t realize you wanted so badly. You clung to his shoulders, thighs cinched around his wide body. He filled and stretched you so goddamn good, but it was the things coming out of his mouth that sent you careening.
“Shit, that’s good. Missed you so fucking much. Can’t believe it's been this long since I’ve been in your cunt.”
Like so many times before, Adam held you in place, his broad hands anchoring you to the sink ledge so he could pound into you with abandon. The slide of his dick was mind-numbing, and you bit into his shirt to keep from shouting.
The tingle first started in your toes. It slithered up your calves and jerked your knees together at Adam’s sides. It had been such a long time since you’d had him inside you that your pussy squeezed tight, earning a growled string of curses at your ear. Your clit was so engorged and aching that his light touch sent your yelp echoing in the little room. Redirecting his hand, you bit down on his thumb and watched his gaze change.
In a second, he was old Adam, punishing and wickedly wild. He forced his thumb further into your mouth and pressed down on your tongue, making the saliva pool around it. Your eager moan was louder than you intended, but it only made him fuck you harder, faster.
He liked it when you were quiet, but he liked it more when you were loud. Liked it even better when you were loud in public.
“Greedy girl, aren’t you? Always ready for me to fuck you stupid.”
You tipped your pelvis into that perfectly tantalizing angle, where the drag of his cock head rubbed against those spots that made you see stars again and again, and you ignited. Everything tensed, toes curling, fingers quivering. Your cunt clenched around him so hard, his thrusts turned violent, forcing you to accept him deeper and deeper.
You wailed his name into his shoulder, unraveling completely from your white hot center outwards.
With his cock seated far inside your ravaged pussy, Adam latched back onto your clit, rubbing the hard nub in quick circles to draw out your orgasm. You shrieked and batted at his hand again, but he caught your arm, drew it behind your back painfully, and bit into your neck.
“If you want my cum, bucket, you’re gonna have to milk me for it.”
His hips kept moving against yours, the slightest of thrusts, but it was his fingers, his evil fingers that ruined you. They never stopped moving at your clit, even when you begged him for a breath. They slid down around your weeping entrance, where his cock stretched you, and back up, bringing a fresh coat of slip to help his fingers fly.
Your eyes slammed shut; your face scrunched up tight and mute. He dropped his mouth to the crook of your neck, cinched your arm more firmly behind your back, and growled as your cunt convulsed for him a second time. You couldn’t even shout; all you could do was keen and quake.
It was enough to push Adam over. He jerked against you, grinding and losing himself to the obscene pull of your spasming pussy. He moaned your name into your pulse and clung to you frantically.  His voice hitched, and he poured into you so hard you heard him sniffle, overcome with the blinding pleasure of it.
When your breathing returned to normal, and the aftershocks subsided, he helped you back into your clothes since your legs were still wobbly. He even tied your shoes.
“Don’t worry.” He bit your cheek the way he used to, the way that was unique to the two of you. “We’ll tell the manager you had a seizure or something.”
Chuckling, you snuck your hand into his; and this time, you left the bathroom together.
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fortysevenswrites · 3 years
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SethKate for the ship questionnaire!
So...I got a little wordy on this one. Under the cut!
How did they first meet?
Well, Kate almost ran Seth over her family's RV, if we want to be technical, where she called him, "just some weirdo", not knowing that she's going to one day become...his second wife! (I will never be able to stop myself from referencing we don’t make the future, we just know it). But actual real meeting was when Richie dragged her back from the Dew Drop Inn pool at gunpoint and found Seth in the hotel room with her dad and brother.
Who felt romantic feelings first?
So Kate had a moment of "oh shit I just had a sexual awakening and I don't know what to do" when Seth punched out the doorman for being a creep (which, also, she had another one of those when Kisa had Richie drink tequila off her foot, so like, it was a VERY long day for Kate and she didn't really have time to explore any of THAT, what with the whole, vampire of it all) and Seth just had NO clue why he was so drawn to Kate during the Longest and Worst Night Of Their Lives TM.
All the same, I think Seth felt more, real, "oh shit, Kate is my forever PERSON" feelings first, during the Mexican Honeymoon and it SCARED THE FUCK OUT OF HIM, because she was taking to criminal life like a duck to water and was like, the most perfect partner he could imagine outside his brother, which then sent his brain on a tailspin because Richie was supposed to be his only ever perfect partner. Which was a big part of why he thought it was right to send her away for her safety in 2x02.
And while Kate definitely had feelings at the time, more of her feelings developed after she died and was fighting off Amaru in her body, and she saw Seth's soul when Amaru tried to kill him, and then saw all the efforts he was making to save her after he found out she was alive.
You! Made! Them! Into! Heroes!
Like, that's when she KNEW she was totally and completely done for.
Did either of them try to resist their feelings?
Hahahaha SO MUCH. Like I said in the last answer, Seth liked Kate so much it scared him enough that he thought the best option was just to send her away for her safety (forgetting that she's so fucking stubborn and is basically the human form of the "fight me" emoji--which, was probably because of the heroin fucking up his what little complex reasoning skills he has.)
And Kate definitely resisted any feelings back in Mexico because of the heroin and she was NOT going to ever commit herself to a junkie.
Who initiated their feelings first?
SETH GECKO JUST WANTS TO HOLD KATE FULLER'S HAND AND I THINK THAT'S BEAUTIFUL.
(yes, I'm referring to 3x04)
It was Seth with his actions throughout season 3, especially once he confirmed that she was actually still alive in 3x04. But it was Kate who said the words first and hit him with the metaphorical 2x4 before she walked through the gate in 3x10.
Who said “I love you” first?
Like I said, it was Kate in 3x10 before she walked into the gate. I also think it's Kate, AGAIN, post-canon, because Seth loves Kate so much he doesn't have sense, but also has a martyr complex a mile wide and is too scared to make a move because...did she mean in general? was she just talking to Scott? did she mean like love in the romantic sense or platonic???? why couldn't she be more clear it's not like we were facing the end of the world or anything.
And Kate had to be like "yes I actually love you, you donut"
Who gets jealous easily?
While Kate may have some insecurities about Seth's history and the women he's been with in the past, Seth really doesn't like other men who are closer to Kate's age to talk to her, especially at Jed's. He's not a caveman about it, but there are times where he'll get a little huffy about it until Kate sets him straight. It's not something that happens often, and it helps that Kate doesn't look like she was just recently a teenager thanks to the red hair.
Who is more protective?
Seth is SO protective. SO protective. A lot of it is because of what Kate's gone through and Seth really wants to shield her from having to deal with anything even remotely like what she went through over those two years. But at the same time? NO ONE fucks with her boys and gets away with it. Kate can be pretty vicious when she wants to be. Do no harm, but take no shit. And Seth LOVES it.
Who remembers the little things?
Seth feels like he can't afford to forget anything because of everything that happened to them since they met. While they both remember like, all the things, Seth is the ones who brings it up the most, like off-hand comments that Kate made in Mexico about things she likes or dislikes, and it always throws her when he remembers things that she didn't expect him to remember.
Who talks about their feelings more?
Kate is the one who instigates the conversations because Seth can kind of be emotionally constipated. He always feels like he feels WAY more than she does and doesn't want to overwhelm her, and Kate's just like, "shut the fuck up, I'm so stupid about you its almost embarrassing".
Who uses the cheesier pickup lines?
Seth, 1000000%, because he loves him some old movies and can't help but quote them. And then he dies a little on the inside when Kate doesn't understand that reference. But she likes the pickup lines all the same.
(Richie, on the other hand, is disgusted by them both.)
What does a first date look like for them?
Because of, you know, everything, they don't really do a traditional first date. They just go from not together (because she was dead, and then possessed) to extremely together, very quickly. The first time they go on a traditional date is probably one night on a trip they take to Galveston some months after season 3. Seth's like, oh shit, we haven't actually gone on a DATE, and Kate's like, whatever you want to do sounds nice (partly because she doesn't want him to feel obligated to do traditional relationship things since from what she knows about him, he's never been about that life), but Seth pulls out all the stops (really nice restaurant out by the beach, brings her flowers, etc) and it's awkward for all of five minutes because they feel like they should be doing traditional early-relationship date things, until they remember everything they've gone through together and Kate makes some comment about Richie which reminds Seth of a funny story about them and one of their early heists and suddenly it's all back to normal.
What do they like to do together?
Crime. They both saw the potential of what they could be as partners with the mercado heist, but of course didn't have time to think about it all what with everything that happened after, but when Seth let himself accept Kate as a partner, it opened up Los Tres Geckos to a hell of a lot more successful and lucrative crimes to pull off. Kate's REALLY fucking good at crime, and Seth loves it.
(Richie, on the other hand, is kind of disgusted by how much Seth loves how good at crime Kate is)
Which one gets angry the most, leaving the other to calm them down?
Kate is definitely the one who tends to be more even-keeled, especially with her "violence is not the answer" upbringing. She knows better than to let Seth get lost in his own head for too long, and with them being together Seth gets a lot better at handling both his anger and his anxiety.
Do they like PDA?
Seth is much more comfortable with it than Kate is. Kate is just really not a fan of how their culebra family and staff have heightened senses and like ALWAYS KNOW thanks to pheromones, so she tries to be as even-keeled as possible and PDA-free around them. Seth doesn't always let her get away with it.
(This may or may not play into the events of House Hunters: Culebra Properties Edition....just saying.)
What are their big spoon / little spoon arrangements?
More often than not, Kate is the big spoon, but it also depends on who's having the worst nightmares and when. Kate just tends to sprawl, and most of that sprawling ends up being on top of Seth.
Does one like the cuddle more than the other?
Seth Gecko is a WORLD CHAMPION CUDDLER. World. Freaking. Champion. Kate is a little surprised by it, but she's super into it. They're pretty much always touching in one way, shape, or form when they're around each other.
Who hogs the blankets?
I don't think either, so much as Seth runs so warm at night that he tends to kick the blankets off both of them and he uses his both heat to keep Kate warm at night.
Who’s more likely to initiate sex?
Seth, 10000%. Kate's always into it, because Seth is DAMN good at what he does, but he tends to initiate more.
Who’s the kinkiest?
Kate is 10000000% not aware of her kinks because of her upbringing, but she finds she's pretty much into whatever Seth suggests. It's all pretty vanilla, but there are some positions that Kate never would have thought of and she's here for it.
Who is the top and bottom in their sex life? Are they interchangeable?
Seth is usually the one who takes control of things, but the times where Kate's in charge, well, are some of the best sex that Seth has ever had.
Who likes giving and who likes receiving oral?
Definitely both. Seth does it more because he doesn't like to let Kate, and also prefers to finish inside her, but Kate is also very good at what she does, on those times.
Can they last more than one round?
Oh definitely. Y'all, despite the fact that Seth started going gray in his late 20s, Seth is NOT that old. He can keep up.
Which one is a morning person?
Kate is slightly more of a morning person compared to Seth, who is absolutely NOT, but considering their lifestyle is mostly nocturnal, but tend to stay up pretty late.
Do either of them like to cook?
Seth knows how to cook fast food-type food from his time at Big Kahuna, and Kate likes to bake more than she likes to cook. But Kate does know how too cook thanks to her upbringing in Bethel and "traditional woman things". They'll split the difference for breakfast, but most often lunches and dinner are either brought in or eaten at Jed's.
If they get married, who proposes first?
This is one of the times in Kate's life where she is pretty traditional, and lets Seth do the proposing. It's also a lot more of a traditional proposal than she expected, with Seth setting up a fuckton of candles on the balcony of their beach house in Galveston and surprising here with takeout from her favorite restaurant and getting down on one knee before dessert.
What kind of wedding do they have?
It's small, and not technically legal since they're all technically dead. Richie officiates, Scott shows up with his culebra girlfriend, and Kisa comes with a very nice gift that Seth is kind of a dick about accepting from her, because they're very much those antagonistic type of friends and he feels awkward about any sincerity from her and being sincere in return. He's also not comfortable with how much dancing Richie and Kisa do together at their small reception, which Kate thinks is hilarious.
Does anyone object to their relationship?
Freddie isn't a fan, but he doesn't get a vote. Scott doesn't like Seth because of how their families first came together (kidnapping is kind of a bad first impression, I guess), but grows to accept their relationship especially after all the efforts Seth took to get Kate back and how Seth did ultimately save Kate's life while Scott was busy freaking out in the church.
Do they have any kids?
Their lifestyle isn't conductive for children (read: crime is illegal), and also Seth is terrified by the idea of treating any potential children like his dad did, or fucking them up in some way. Along with her fears of potentially going through what her mother suffered before she died, Kate is also scared of passing on any potential leftovers from Amaru. They just mutually decide to pass on that.
They do end up taking in the newly turned culebra teenagers that come their way, because Kate has some experience with encountering culebras at a young age, and Scott is always available for consults as an eternal 16-year-old. They stay at Jed's for a while to acclimate before moving on. It ends up being a handful every year, and Kate always keeps track of them and stays in touch. It's as close to motherhood as it gets for her, and she loves it.
Do they have any pets?
One day, Seth finds an injured cat in their backyard, and just like that, they have a cat. Once she recovers, she becomes the queen of the house, and she loves cuddling with them both on the couch in the evenings.
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killing-all-joy · 3 years
Text
Dancing at 2 a.m. in our Pajamas...
I was inspired by this prompt by @sanderssides-prompts that I saw two weeks ago. I write really slow, so here it is now. I strayed a bit from the prompt, but I hope y'all like it! It’s really just fluffy Roceit. [Edit: here’s part two!]
(cw: janus is a swear-snake so swearing tw)
Janus rubbed lazily at his eyes. He was beyond irritated—for some reason, his mess of a brain decided it would be a good idea to wake up after only three hours of sleep. It was two in the morning, it was raining outside, and he had a lot to do the following day. His brain was running on very little sleep, but despite the small number of things he was able to consider clearly in his mind, he knew that he would be unable to return to his slumber without a substantial period of leaving his room. He was very well aware that he had to reach a higher state of awakeness than he was at now to be able to go back to sleep. It would never make any sense to him, but he complied because he hated sleep deprivation.
He trudged over to his closet and threw on a yellow sweatshirt over his sleep shirt. Then, clothed in that sweatshirt, a pair of black sweatpants, and fluffy black socks, he sunk out of his room, deciding not to bother with his hat. No one would be in the kitchen anyway, and he had decided with a look in a mirror that his hair, while fluffy as ever, wasn't too horribly messed up from sleep.
He planned on getting a glass of ice water, watching an episode of Avatar: The Last Airbender at a very low volume, pacing the living room a couple of times, and then returning to his room to fall back asleep.
His mind seemed to only get fuzzier; Janus hardly registered his present actions in any shape or form. He walked into the blurred haze that was the mindscape living room, grabbing a cylindrical glass from a cabinet and clumsily sliding on the tiled floor over to the freezer. He opened the door, flinching at how cold the damn thing was for his serpentine physiology. He grabbed three pieces of ice and dropped them into his glass. One fell on the floor at his carelessness so he kicked it under the refrigerator and grabbed another to replace it. He walked over to the sink, and after three incidents of fingers slipping on the metal handle, turned on the water and filled his glass. He hissed and immediately turned off the water when it started to overflow.
He sipped the cold water so it wouldn't spill onto the floor and walked away from the sink, deciding to drink in the living room. He stopped short at the door-less doorway, finally realizing that against his predictions, there was someone awake at this hour and occupying the living room.
Of all people it could be, it was Roman.
Just his luck.
His brain could hardly register just how unlucky that was. Nor could it realize that sinking out would probably be the best thing to do in that situation. Roman, his old enemy, his friend (ish), his crush: hateful, annoying, funny, talented, lovely, handso-
"Hey."
Janus' sleepy thoughts halted. He tried to meet Roman's eyes, but likely failed because he could only make out the vague outline of a face. He tried his best to show acknowledgement, but was too tired to put much effort into it.
"Why are you awake?" Roman asked from where he was sitting on an armchair.
Janus thought about that for a second, his brain refusing to remember at this time. Eyebrows furrowed, he tried his best to retrace his steps. His eyes then fell on the glass in his hand, thoughts calming as they recalled. Janus held up his water glass to indicate that it was dehydration that woke him and then made a noise, trying to ask Roman the same question.
"Ah yes, dehydration: the more vicious demon in the early hours of the morning," Roman said with a strained smile. He then bit his lip, knowing Janus wanted to know his reason for being awake as well. "I, uh, couldn't sleep. Too many exciting thoughts, too little time...the price of being Creativity, y'know?"
Janus did know. Or, at least, he was pretty sure Fully Awake Janus knew. (Fully Awake Janus could not count the number of times he'd got up for a glass of water and ended up finding Remus setting something on fire at some ungodly hour. To Fully Awake Janus, it would follow that Roman would be similar in regards to insomnia.)
Janus made a noise of understanding, shuffling over to the sofa. He clumsily set his glass on the coffee table (the contents almost spilling as he fumbled with its placement) and collapsed onto the cushions.
“Are you sure that you shouldn’t go back to sleep, Boa Conflictor? If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were sleepwalking.”
When he figured out what the nickname was saying and why it fitted him, Janus snorted. He shook his head to indicate a negative to Roman’s question. “Need water,” he mumbled, taking a sip from the glass.
“Makes sense,” said Roman, moving from the armchair where he was sitting to the sofa next to Janus. “But you should go back to sleep immediately after.”
Janus shook his head again. “Won’t be able. Tried, first need to stuff.”
Roman chuckled. “’Need to stuff’? We better get you stuffing soon, or else you’ll be speaking a whole new language.”
Janus huffed and rolled his eyes. He never appreciated being teased. He was too tired (and perhaps too in love) to be angry, however.
He continued sipping the glass of water, finishing it quickly with no more commentary from Roman. He set it back down on the coffee table, deciding that he would put it in the sink in the morning when he could walk and think like a normal human being (or, well, side). He pulled his knees to his chest; he always got cold in these early hours.
His plan was thwarted, however, when Roman stood from where he was sitting on Janus’ left, picked up the glass, and headed to the kitchen. Janus made a confused noise before he saw Roman place the glass carefully in the sink. When Roman returned, Janus looked up at him in confusion.
“Didn’t havffe, I could’vve mor’hing.”
“Surprisingly, I understood you there.”
“Thanmkh.”
“You’re welcome.”
Janus buried his head in his knees, wondering what he could do that wouldn’t disturb Roman. He figured the prince would be bothered by him watching TV (and also make a lot of comments on whatever he watched, potentially waking the others), so he pondered over other activities.
He heard music start to play quietly through the room. His head lifted slightly to see Roman set his phone down gently on the coffee table. His bare feet then took two smalls steps to stand in front of Janus, where he offered him a hand.
“You said you ‘need to stuff’ before you go back to sleep,” said Roman, sounding like he was trying to mock him but not fully getting that tone across. If Fully Awake Janus were here, he’d say Roman sounded nervous. “I figured, leading you in a dance could perhaps convince your brain to allow you to sleep. Besides, I could use some physical stimulation.”
Janus looked at Roman’s trembling hand for half a second. He then removed his left arm from where it was clasped around his legs and took Roman’s right hand. As soon as Janus’ hand was in his, Roman brought Janus’ hand to his lips and kissed his knuckles. Janus blushed furiously at this and was too tired to figure that he should hide such an obvious display of weakness. He let go of his legs and stood up from the sofa. He lost his balance from the position change, but Roman's reflexes were quick and he didn't let him fall more than a few inches. He pulled Janus to his feet and held him securely in his arms. Janus' face flushed an even darker red than it already was and he turned his head away from Roman, casting his gaze to the floor.
"Look at me," Roman murmured lowly.
Janus complied, despite not wanting Roman to see his blushing. He smiled warily at him, anxiety caused by the possibility of Roman seeing the real reason for his flushed cheeks.
"There we go," said Roman, at the same low volume. Janus noted how he wasn't as hyper or dramatic during these early hours, yet still just as passionate (if not more). "Since you need to do stuff in order to properly go back to sleep, I figured I could lead you in a couple of dances. Unless you think that you would collapse of fatigue like Sleeping Beauty...?"
Janus nodded. "Okay."
Roman grinned, tightening one hand's hold on Janus' waist and moving the other hand to hold Janus'. Janus was allowed a couple of seconds to sort himself into a proper dancing stance before Roman started to lead.
"I sh'ld lead."
"You'd walk into every piece of furniture in this room."
Janus made a wounded noise.
"Only because you've shown just how clumsy you are at this time of morning."
Janus huffed. "I'll st'p on foot."
"I can take it," Roman replied with a teasing smile.
Janus rolled his eyes, tightening his grip on Roman's hand and shoulder so he wouldn’t fall.
"Okay, JJ. One, two, three, four," Roman started counting under his breath to help Janus' walnut brain, "...one, two, spin, four, you're wonderful at this, Snakerella..."
---
Janus could feel his brain start to adjust to being awake and a bit of Fully Awake Janus start to have influence in his thoughts. Well, it wasn't exactly "adjust", because it wasn't gradual.
It was just a bit slower than a snap of the fingers.
Nothing was new in his actions, Roman didn't startle them, hell, it was during the middle of a slow song. But without any obvious triggering factor, his brain abruptly shifted into a more awake state of mind. And he realized his situation.
He was dancing...
...in the living room...
...with the love of his life...
...at half-past two in the goddamn morning.
Janus, still a far cry from Fully Awake Janus but with a lot of his mental capacities, couldn't quite remember the exact turn of events that got him here. Things were a bit blurry, events were splotchy, and he could only remember bits and pieces. So, ultimately, how he—while sleepy and filter-less—managed to get Roman "Princey" Fucking Sanders to dance with him was almost a mystery. He did know, however, that the only way Roman could have agreed was if he was extra sleep-deprived too.
"You like this song, Janus?"
He considered saying the truth, that he wasn't listening; or a well-thought-out lie, that he hadn't heard it before but thought it would fit with a playlist he had; or saying that he'd heard it before and liked it very much. But suddenly, Roman pulled him close and to his chest—and he smelled so good and his white sleep shirt was so snuggly and his hair was just inches away and oh so very soft and Janus was in love, so in love and he couldn't help but make a noise of happiness about their current situation instead of answering the question.
"I'm glad you like it."
Janus almost laughed; Roman mistook his noise for one of confirmation, also implying that he thought Janus was still in his state of Properly Out Of It. Janus had an act to keep up if he wanted Roman to continue being so intimate with him, so he decided he would play along—not more than he needed to, of course, but whenever Roman would prompt him to talk, he’d respond how he would if he had just woken up.
More songs went by, their almost-clumsy dancing that they exerted very little energy in doing continuing with it. Roman rarely spoke, but it was comfortable that way, with Roman just holding him as their feet glided across the floor with only the crescent moon as their witness. Janus knew very well that his emotions were senseless and cheesy, especially at this time of the morning in his current situation, but he almost scoffed when he realized that he felt loved—loved by Roman, and loved in a way he had never felt before. It made him feel warm and hopeful, and if he was fully awake, he would probably vomit. Nevertheless, it was a pleasant feeling no matter how much he didn't want to admit it, so he relished in it, soaking up the unfamiliar emotion he figured he would never get again and savoring it as one does with hot chocolate during the coldest winter nights. It was warm and calming, with an underlying hint of melancholy and bittersweetness. Just like how Janus perceived Roman.
Roman and Janus had differences that they were slowly putting behind them in an attempt to advance into a tentative friendship, so it made sense for Janus to think he would never get this again. He was tired, Roman was tired, and he remembered the dashing prince saying something about 'rousing thoughts' so this was probably serving as a release of all the stress that built up in the later hours. Tomorrow, things would be back to normal, but he would never forget.
The song started to slow to a speed that seemed inadvisable to Janus because the song was already quite a slow song in itself, but he couldn't help but acknowledge that the speed was romantic too. Roman's feet stopped taking larger steps and started swaying.
"Sway with me, mi cielo," said Roman in a voice that was practically silent. "This is the last song."
Janus' face burned from the Spanish nickname Roman gave him. Janus didn't know Spanish, but he was able to piece that it might have been a term of endearment. It was late, so it made sense that Roman would slip up like that, especially since he's the romantic side and their current situation was rather intimate. Of course, that assumption could also be Janus' wishful thinking.
"Thank you for dancing with me," muttered Roman, thumb starting to trace circles on Janus' waist. "I needed this outlet too."
From the way Roman phrased it, it seemed that Janus was mistaken in his assumption that he had convinced Roman to dance with him, that it seemed that things happened the other way around. This made Janus' heart flutter.
He hummed, closing his eyes. "M' ple'srre."
Janus peeked one eye open to see Roman's head turn down and smile at him warmly—lovingly, Janus would say, if he didn't know better.
The song started to come to an end. When the last beat played, Roman guided Janus into a small dip. Roman's happy smile as he stared down at Janus was hypnotizing, and Janus knew that he would fight a thousand wars just to see that smile again.
"Let's go to bed, hm? Neither of us wants to be tired in the morning."
Janus nodded. Roman pulled him to his feet and put an arm around his waist. They walked up the staircase together, Janus leaning his head on Roman's shoulder as they walked.
Janus' room was closest, so they paused there as Roman opened the door and led them inside. He kissed Janus hair and slowly removed his arm from Janus' waist.
“Goodnight, Janus,” whispered Roman, pushing a strand of Janus’ hair behind his ear.
Janus kissed Roman’s cheek. “G’nigh.”
He slowly closed the door, smiling to himself. He knew he would come to remember and regret his sleepy clumsiness in the morning, but he would be thankful for it until then.
~
Taglist: @somehow-i-got-an-account @justanotherhumanstuff @neo-neo-neo @fander-fic-recs
~
Sorry this took so long to finish. I hope you liked it! [Edit: here’s part two again so you don’t have to scroll all the way back up lol]
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tonya-the-chicken · 3 years
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I’m not going to change your views but it does feel a bit dismissive when you say it wasn’t that bad because he had rich parents who neglected him but hey they got a maid for him and he probably wasn’t outcasted or bullied so hey it’s not that bad right 🤷‍♀️! I don’t know he definitely didn’t have the worse out of the villains but I don’t know it felt a bit dismissive is all. Although we need to all remember these are fictional characters so have no idea why the other anon needed to get so aggressive! Also the person in the notes I don’t know how to say it but uh the whole the Todoroki’s had a rich father they didn’t have to work a day in their life take is not a good look. Just because someone has parents with money it doesn’t derail the fact that neglect can cause trauma.
Anyways for the real reason I sent this, you wonder why Dabi is so insane. Well take into account the neglect alongside the fact that he burnt to near death up on that hill alone at the age of what 13? That’s got to be extra traumatising, especially for a child that was already not mentally ok. We also don’t know what his circumstances were like after that fire, like was he homeless? Or picked up by someone nefarious? Kind of like AFO(not him exactly but someone nasty) who maybe fed on his brewing anger and hate instead of positive healing. I’m sure we will find out at some point? I don’t think it was just what happened in the Todoroki household or the fire that broke his mind? There had to be other factors after the fire after his “death”!
[[WARNING!!! I love Dabi as a character but I am not a woobifier so if you are too much into him don't read!!!! No complaints taken, y'all will be blocked for being rude I am too old to deal with people unable to interact with me in good faith (anon it's not for you, you are good and I can't understand your point of view I am just not as good as a person and too old for that shit)]]
I don't think I will change my mind either but I feel like the belief that every trauma is equally bad is just... Simply wrong. Like, we can legit compare this stuff and how badly it affects our brain, what do y'all think psychologists research 🤷‍♀️ Like, your therapist won't tell you this because it's not their job to make you understand you not the centre of the Earth (and it won't help because it is a legit trauma response that is very valid but is annoying you're fucking 25 yo). And to say that, neglectful parenthood is probably the worst parenthood style, as far as I know XD I wrote coursework about this (neglectful bitches are having a lot of need to make us the biggest victims (the bitches is me))... It also feels really American to me? Like, are we going to pretend people who got to live in a nice house and were neglect somehow got it as bad as people living in poverty or warzones? Hello? Imagine telling some orphan "I know you have no parents but actually, my trauma of my father not spending enough time with me is just as severe as yours". Bruh couldn't be me sorry... Like, even taking into account the fact that we can have weaker or stronger nervous systems or be more prone to depressive episodes *looks in the mirror and cries* I simply wouldn't find the guts to say my trauma is as severe as idk people who had physically abusive parents or no parents at all or who were disowned for being gay
And like **again** I am not saying that neglect is not traumatic I WAS NEGLECTED THIS IS TRAUMATIZING AS FUCK. I just am living in a country at war and with lots of discrimination problems and I like... Can't say I am the biggest victim. Sorry I can't though there were times when I was a lot more bitchy especially before being in therapy so I understand where you are coming from and I know what I am saying won't resonate with everyone (it's ok go on your own healing journey I believe in you) but this doesn't mean it is garbage and won't help me or someone else... I've already talked once about it but as a person, I am very easily irritated and envious and really not your local Jesus and partially my trauma turned me like this so being more humble about my sufferings helps me not be a complete bitch (believe me or not but people with traumas and mental illnesses are often insufferable *looks in the mirror* not me though I am perfect... BUT IT IS OK TO BE INSUFFERABLE OK??? like, bitch, that's normal. That's normal to stink when you are depressed it's ok to be a bitch when you are hurting. Forgive yourself because I forgive you (when you are not being an abusive asshole but if you apologize and explain yourself I will forgive that too)
The reason why I talk about the fact he is rich is that I've got a disease called leftism and I am a person of several marginalized identities and since this fandom LOVES looking at characters like real humans, I looked at Dabi this way. And if Dabi was a real human, I wouldn't sympathize with him one bit. I would fucking hate him for being the biggest entitled asshole who commits crimes for the reason his Daddy didn't give him attention. Bitch, my Dad didn't give me attention either! But somehow I don't kill people! And I don't even have money!!!! But like... I am not denying that neglectful parents are not a problem. It is. But he is overreacting, bro. He needs to humble down and recognize the fact he is a fucking idiot (he is). He has inherently so much more resources to recover and heal himself than I had... Yes, I am just being jealous at this point but honestly. Making an entire country suffer for you is not a good thing and y'all need to stop using trauma and mental illness as an excuse for people. No! Being abusive to people because of neglect is not valid, is overreacting and you had no reason to do that. I am dismissing your trauma because you are exaggerating it to make me sympathize with your asshole behaviour. I won't judge people with different sets of standards as I judge myself
I bet it would be dismissive and bad if I said it in conversation with someone who is currently struggling with mental health and is not a murderer. But guess what! I don't talk with humans and my friends the same way I talk on my Tumblr about fictional characters 🤷‍♀️ Not to mention I don't have rich friends akabsksbxm
I think with Dabi there's this whole thing where we saw him at 14 (poor baby boy) and 24 (a grown-ass boy) and... Like, I am so sorry for 14 years old Touya not receiving the help he needs (bruh so relatable) but I am not gonna act like 24 years old bitch can't get his ass to a psychiatrist (extremely unrelatable and infuriating). We shouldn't apply the same standards to kids and adults. We can talk all day long about how society is bad and how our parents ruined us but at some points, you gotta take your life into your own hands and do something and be an adult. And it's fucking hard when you're born with a shitty brain that was fucked up by your parents even more in a society where no one gives a fuck but I sincerely don't know another way to live. You will feel bad and want to die but you either keep on recovering or keep on getting worse and at this point getting worse is Dabi's *choice* That's how I live, that's my framework and I am, of course, extremely fortunate in a lot of ways but I just don't know how are you supposed to survive without the notion that grown people are responsible for themselves and their mental health. We can't act like adults are babies
But as a character, Dabi is fucking hot ngl. Like, do I sometimes want to murder my entire family, make them suffer AND commit terrorist attacks? We all do. Dabi is the dark fantasy of us neglectful bitches craving some attention. Gotta kill the president and tell everyone that my Dad sucks. Imagine the entire country hearing your Dad sucks? That's the juice, that's the dream. Trauma makes you vicious. I get the sentiment. Imagine all those fuckers who made you feel like shit pissing their pants and crying? Imagine your Mom being afraid of you the way you used to be afraid of her? People do have the desire for some violent justice but like... Think of bullied kids committing school shootings. But instead of a kid, it's a grown man who graduated school and who also have a rich father
Ok too much about irl stuff and philosophy shit. I know my way of talking is kinda brute so just know the way I treat people is different from that I treat fictional characters, in particular, I don't call real-life humans submissive and breedable... And stuff...
Damn Dabi is kinda good to project your hatred of your parents in bruh, I should write a fanfic about that (would be cathartic)
To the plotline, I am also very interested in what the hell happened with him after burning because... How the hell he wasn't found? I kind of DON'T want him to be groomed at this point because I feel like it won't be as cool as him just more naturally evolving into what he became. Like, surely, he is an asshole but consider this: as a villain, he is morally obligated to be an asshole
I feel like someone hiding him and Touya overstating the gruesomeness of his living conditions to the dude so he feels *bad* for him and hides him and feels sympathy and Touya gets attention but also begins to reassure himself in the fact his Dad needs to be punished... Idk it's a lot of mystery but I feel like more suffering won't deliver the point the way I want it... I mean it CAN be handled this way and initially I thought a lot about Dabi being brainwashed a bit or having his memories altered so it seems worse to him or even him being groomed or lied too but nowadays I am not into it. I mean I believe in Horikoshi and that he will handle him well 🛐
I talk a lot so I will summarize
If we judge him as a real human
14 yo Touya - DID NOTHING WRONG IN HIS LIFE PROTECT HIM
24 yo Dabi - go fuck yourself bitch you older than me and act like a child and kill people, I couldn't care less about your trauma rich boy
If you want me to talk as his psychologist
Yeah, it is painful and sad, I understand him so much and surely, his trauma is valid as is his hatred but probably revenge won't bring him what he wants. And what he wants is love and attention. But he gotta make choices that will lead to his healing. He needs to *want* to heal. And we will step by step go to the healing because it is possible. He is loved and he is enough. AND YOU ALL MOTHERFUCKERS WILL HEAL I BELIEVE IN YOU BESTIES
Also his therapist (behind his back)
You won't believe it but my client is the most infantile attention whore I've ever met
But if we talk about him as a character... Very delicious soup
If you talk with your friends
Please, if your friends are being abusive to you or someone else don't even LET them say how their trauma made them this way. No. Nothing allows you to be an abuser. Call them out and stop them and make them talk to the therapist. Like, surely, there are extreme situations like severe mental illnesses or extreme neglect where we should be more forgiving but babying adults won't do you any good and won't make them recover
Yeah, I guess this is what I forgot to say. When I say "it wasn't that bad" what I mean is that I would be more forgiving to people who had it worse. It's more of a personal measure where I can tolerate stuff from people who had particular traumas or from those who suffered greatly (it's not my place to be a bitch here). I can forgive 14 years old or a poor person for stealing stuff but not the 25-year-old man who got no need for money and is not a kleptomaniac. I would be more forgiving to Shigaraki than to Dabi because Shigaraki was groomed a whole lot. Same for Toga, who is not even an adult or Twice who is a poor orphan. But that doesn't mean I would forgive them completely. All of them are shitty people. It's just that they had fewer resources and possibilities to not be what they became while Dabi had more but he acts like he is extremely hurt and the biggest victim which is like... There will be people like this in your life, please, don't make friends with them, they WILL abuse you
I talked a lot damn. It's adhd I can't shut up
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