#sometimes I just want to punch people or set them on fire...

[foldingfittedsheets]

I worked retail for a long time and people really do treat you like shit sometimes. But between selling sex toys, mattresses, and jewelry I can say definitively I got treated worst selling mattresses.

All three of my jobs were in sales but selling sex toys we were allowed to put people in their place, and in jewelry people didn’t want to misbehave in a fancy setting. But people at the mattress store had no problem yelling at me, hitting on me, or insulting me to my face.

For a while I was managing my own store for the company. I ran a small location and had struggling employees placed with me for rehabilitation. If their numbers improved they could go back to bigger stores. If not, they got fired.

So this meant I was the manager of problem employees. At one point both of my people had a foot out the door. The company was going downhill and changed computer systems and they were fed up. Consequently, they made a ton of mistakes, because they just didn’t care about the job or learning the new systems.

I strolled into work on what was essentially my Monday to a shit show. Deliveries scheduled without product, wrong things on orders, poor expectations of the process, you name it. I spent the entire morning getting yelled at for mistakes that weren’t mine.

The final straw came when a man called furious that his moms bed for her nursing home had a delivery window he couldn’t accommodate. This wasn’t a huge disaster since we still had time to deliver it before she moved. I ran him through the options and he just kept screaming at me. Not for a solution but because I was there and he was frustrated.

My heart filled with malice and a cold fury. A calculating part of my brain had a realization in that moment that I could stay a punching bag or I could strike back.

I quavered my voice delicately, taking in a shaky, warbling breath like I was trying not to cry. “Sir,” I quivered through fake tears, “I don’t know what you want from me! I told you what I can do, I didn’t make this mistake I’m just trying to fix it!” My voice broke pitifully on the last syllables, sounding in all ways like a sweet innocent person being yelled at who’s just trying her best, really!

It was like I’d doused him with cold water. My emotional act was the realization that he was screaming at someone who was just doing their damn job, and he was being an asshole. He hastily made an excuse and hung up.

I had a third employee covering with me from another store that day who heard everything. When I hung up, I looked over to see them watching me with an awed expression. “Did… did you just pretend to cry?”

“I absolutely fucking did,” I said with feeling, “and I’d do it a thousand more times. If that’s what it takes for someone to realize they’re behaving like a fucking prick, they deserve it.” The employee looked at me like I was their hero.

The man called back, apologizing profusely, having magically arranged his schedule to accommodate delivery. He came in later that week with an apology Starbucks gift card. I was gracious in my acceptance.

I pulled it a few more times before leaving the company. I felt no shame in the ruse. If someone behaves so poorly that it’s plausible their behavior would drive someone to tears they deserve to feel absolutely wretched about it.

#ramblies #ffs foibles #story #retail #retail hell #I have had people over the years had qualms with the ruse #one person even told me it was so unprofessional #that I’d pretend to be in more distress was not nice of me. but getting yelled at is not nice and I’m in a position where I can’t yell back #and who would they complain to that I cried? would they go to corporate and say how unprofessional the lady cried when I screamed at her!

[rubiehart]

can you write something for jj + pope having a crush/dating a kook! reader? headcanons maybe? :)

i think you meant them both separately having a crush on kook!reader like not both at the same time?? but if this isn’t what you’re looking for lmk and i can totally rewrite it!! also this came out way longer than expected, i got carried away…

JJ!

✧ contrary to popular belief, i feel like he wouldn’t come up to you right away, especially if you were the so called ‘kook princess’, he’d study you from afar at first, catching glimpses of you at a kegger or maybe on the marsh with your girls catching some sun in your skimpy little bikini.

✧ you’d catch his attention because you weren’t a complete bitch like a lot of the other kook girls he’d had encounters with for starters, but also because you were the complete opposite of the tom boy-ish girls from the cut.

✧ he wouldn’t mentioned his (not so) little crush on you to any of the other pogues because he knew exactly what they would say ‘she’s too good for you jj.’, knowing all about his promiscuity, but he wasn’t gonna give up so easily.

✧ you first talked to him at some kegger thrown for the start of summer, despite your good girl reputation you and jj managed to bounce off each others jokes pretty much all night, bantering like friends which was refreshing coming from a kook, he hadn’t expected you to be like this but he somehow liked you more because of it.

✧ this obviously confused the pogues. jj bagging the kook princess? no chance. you were polar opposites. when jj was questioned about it he just told john b ‘what can i say man, opposites attract.’ with a wink which made john b roll his eyes.

✧ you’d been talking for a while when you came to realise the talk about the ‘big bad pogue jj maybank’ wasn’t real, and he was a genuinely nice guy and you really did like him even though he wasn’t the kind of guy you’d usually go for, stuck up preppy assholes were more expected, you guessed. that’s why so many people questioned your close relationship with jj and why you’d bother with a pogue like him, which you’d answer with some more than impolite remark or hand gesture or a punch in the face, when some bitch spoke about the man you were forced to love in secret because of the split between kooks and pogues.

✧ after you started dating and the news was out to the island, the waters seemed to calm down and you could walk around the island together holding hands, truly in love without getting yelled at by some random boneheaded kook just for simply being together.

✧ when he’d spend the night at your house, he’d be surprised by the luxury you’d been given on a silver spoon all your life, not exactly envious per-se just more shocked you weren’t a brat about it, lounging on your comfy mattress that he seemed to welcome him perfectly, your warm skin pressed up to his own and just you. clouding his senses as he drifted off to sleep with a lil’ smile on his face.

✧ you’d wear his shirts to bed sometimes when he’d sleepover, seeing them practically engulfing you making him all warm and fuzzy inside, leaning to press a big sloppy kiss to your lips making you giggle and push him away, whining “jayjjjj!” he’d just wink and reply “y’know you love me pretty girl.”

POPE!

✧ pope is honestly such a sweetheart so i feel like he’d be introduced through friends, way too nervous to go up to you himself, eventually your friends would scatter leaving you both a little further down the beach huddled around the fire pit soaking in the little warmth the flickering flame gave out.

✧ he’d be stuttering over his words, trying to keep eye contact with you through the conversation but it was a challenge because you were easily the prettiest girl he’d ever seen.

✧ after talking for a little while you took a liking to him, inviting him to hangout at the beach the next night, deciding to set up a little beach picnic for the two of you, wanting to get to know him properly away from your tipsy conversation at the boneyard party the previous night.

✧ he’d gone home and told the pogues about the night you had planned, all giddy and smiling, john b slapping him on the shoulder with a prideful grin “that’s my boy.”

✧ he’d arrived at the beach, a lot quieter than usual especially when the sun was setting, seeing your white jeep in the parking lot, clearly empty and mad his way down to the shoreline, spotting you on a white and red checkered blanket, waving rapidly and giggling when you saw him smile and wave, shoving his hands into his pockets and making the rest of the way over to you.

✧ his body tensed up when he saw you wrapped up in a pretty yellow sundress, hugging your body in all the right places and your hair flowing freely down your back and splayed over your shoulders care-freely. “hey pope!” you smiled, getting up to engulf him in a hug, breathing in his musky scent and settling down onto the picnic blanket. he reciprocated the hug and pulled away looming into your eyes.

✧ “you uh, you look really pretty.” he stuttered out nervously, gesturing to your figure. you giggled and raised your eyebrows, eyes taking down his own body, “you clean up nice yourself, heyward.” you smile, which you see a faint blush grace his cheeks which you decide not to poke fun about, already sensing his nervousness, which honestly you found adorable.

✧ you continued in comfortable conversation about anything and everything, once he got comfortable enough he started telling you all about himself, his dad’s business, where he was planning to go to college and his goals for the future, he seemed to know what he wanted which was a total green flag, giggling at all of the jokes he’d make and adding in your own little stories every now and then.

✧ as the sun started dipping beneath the horizon casting a dark orange hue over the whole landscape, and most of the food was gone, excuse a few spilled grapes from trying to throw and catch them into each others mouths, giggling loudly when they missed and bounced of pope’s forehead, he turned to you, “i always thought you were the prettiest girl on the island.” your eyes met his at his sudden confession and you looked suprised, never been told something like that before, “really?” you whispered quietly, not quiet believing what he said.

✧ “really.” he said, feeling a spur of confidence seeing the starstruck look on your face and deciding it was now or never. “want me to prove it?” he whispered, leaning in to tuck a lock of hair behind you ear, you nodding dumbfoundly and swallowing, not believing this was really happening. he leaned in and your warm lips were connected passionately, tasting him on your tongue, and nothing else mattered.

#jj maybank blurbs #pope heyward blurbs #jj x kook reader ‹𝟹 #pope x kook reader ᡴꪫ #jj maybank #outer banks #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank smut #obx #jj maybank concepts #pope heyward #pope obx #john b obx #rafe obx #obx smut #obx x reader #obx imagine #obx fic #jj obx #obx fanfiction #obx cast #jj maybank prompt #jj maybank blurb #jj mayback imagine #jj x reader #jj maybank headcanon #pope heyward smut #rudy pankow #jonathan daviss #john b routledge

[starrbar]

One thing that always baffles me and that I legit continuously forget about because it's such a weird concept to me is that lots of people think that to "ship" a pairing is to view it as completely healthy and ideal for both characters involved, and to thus want it to be canon.

But that's... just not the case with so many ships??

Think of it this way. I could legitimately see a ship as "relationship goals" and "should be canon", but I could just as easily see it as a thriller or toy train crash or a way to vent about my own, real issues that I've had to overcome.

When I watch a horror movie, I don't necessarily want my favorite characters in it to die. And even when I do want people to die, it's not because I think it's a good thing?? It's because I know it's fake and it's fun to watch or think about. It's fun to play superhero punching the bad guy. It's fun to play games where you set people on fire or make a giant fish swallow them.

And when I "ship" something ungodly toxic or downright awful, it's not because I'm under any impression that it represents a relationship that should be imitated or strived for. It's because it's thrilling. It's exciting. It's weird. It's even uncomfortable sometimes, but it's uncomfortable in a therapeutic way.

I've never seen someone ACTUALLY glorifying the unhealthy aspects of their favorite ship. I only ever see people playing toy trains or coping with trauma.

And it's goddamn bizarre to me that so many people think of "shipping" as an inherently prescriptive thing when it's actually just a game.

It's just a game.

It's JUST A GAME.

#shipping discourse #fandom discourse #proship #I guess #that's what proship means right? #god why am I here #starrspeaks

[beanghostprincess]

I saw the strawhats chronic pain asks and had a moment of CROSS GUILD CHRONIC PAIN-

Crocodile is an amputee. Like. Canonically. Phantom pains.

Mihawk has HELLA light sensitivity vibes ((I Gift him,,,,, my migraines))

And Buggy? Oh my favorite little punching bag, I bet the spatial awareness necessary for his DF must he OFF THE CHARTS, not to mention bomb making, harmful chemicals, etc, I feel it in my bones that he has an autoimmune disorder of some kind and also migraines bc the highest flattery I can give is projection.

Ignore this if you wanna, t'was just a Thought, love your blog, Bean!!!!!! ♡♡♡♡♡♡

YAY CROSS GUILD ASK I AM IN SUCH A CROSS GUILD MOOD LATELY YESYESYESYES!!!!!!!! And I'm making this romantic because if I don't make cross guild gay I might die. Thank you.

Okay, so what I'm hearing here is that they keep their lights real low on their shared tent, and whenever they have meetings: At the start of their business relationship, they're still learning how to get used to being together. Buggy is used to stage lights but only for a while and he doesn't want these two to know another weak spot of him (also the pain around his whole body is killing him sometimes), so he tries to deal with the migraines and being uncomfortable because he knows that complaining will only lead to these two using him as a punching bag. But lucky for him, Mihawk does mention one day that he hates brightness (because edgy vampire can't say 'my head fucking hurts' like a functional human) and so he says something about candles. Buggy is afraid they might set the tent on fire but he prefers this over the headaches. Crocodile doesn't give a fuck about this, honestly. Then, they start growing closer and y'know, I'll just skip to them dating- They're dating. They share a tent there at Karai Bari. And now it's something to do instinctively? Like they just keep the lights low or light up some candles and they just live like that. Whenever they're on a ship they do this too.

Following what I just said, they're affectionate but like, in a weird way. Because, y'know, look at them. Buggy ends up crying and complaining about his headaches and also when his body won't stop hurting. He's a drama queen, of course, a diva. He lives flashily. Cries flashily, too. He always curls up beside Crocodile so the big big comfy man can provide him some comfort and warmth and pats on the head or something. Crocodile just runs his hook through his hair softly and lets him be annoying for a while until he falls asleep on top of him. If he has to do something he just??? Won't do it??? He's a pirate but he isn't a fucking monster. One day Mihawk catches them and they share that look of understanding that only cat owners understand, because God (Nika is the only one I believe in, something something amen) is watching and if you dare to move when a cat's in your lap, you go instantly to hell. On the other hand, when Buggy cries and Mihawk is the one around, he gives him some painkillers and turns off the lights completely to then read Buggy one of his books. He does this without saying a word and the first time this weird, silent sign of affection happens, Buggy is speechless. And also, yes, Mihawk can read in the dark perfectly well because he's a cat. He sees in the dark. I even think Buggy can see his gold eyes staring at him. They're like the headlights of a car. Oh, and Mihawk deals with his migraines in perfect silence but when it's a bad day he gets into a very irritable and irascible mood. Most people would be complaining about it but at least this way he's more talkative? Somehow? He's a bitch to Buggy for a while and then they just talk shit about other people together while Crocodile makes a comment like "If you're well enough to complain, you're well enough to continue worki-" and it's, like, the and only time Buggy instinctively throws a pillow at him to shut him up. Never again, though. Scary mafioso-looking boyfriend.

Now that we're talking about Crocodile, the phantom pains: They stress the fuck out of him. They're painful and uncomfortable and he wants to strangle somebody. On a good day, that somebody isn't Buggy. And on a bad day, Buggy really tries to be the sweetest fucking thing on earth by making everything comfortable for him and disappearing right away. Maybe he starts an argument with Mihawk for something stupid but they make up later, it's fine. But, you know what? Sometimes he needs comfort and somebody to distract him too, so one day (when Buggy is about to disappear for hours so he doesn't end up suffering the consequences of staying too long with him) he tells Buggy to stay. The clown is frightened, but he does what he's told and- And it's surprisingly sweet? Crocodile just tells him to talk to him. Explain something. Anything. Complain about the fucking weather or tell a joke. Anything. And Buggy is genuinely surprised but ends up either talking shit about people or telling him anecdotes or just reading him the paper. And Crocodile seems to like it??? A surprise for both, really, but the man actually likes having the clown around because it is working really well as a distraction and when Buggy is not being annoying Crocodile realizes why he loves him. He loves him when he's annoying too, though, he bullies him out of love. Sometimes he just tells Buggy to come sit on his lap and stay there and Crocodile is still in pain but somehow being with the clown makes him feel better. Mihawk tries to be comforting on these days too but it's more of a "you ought to rest, otherwise you'll be irritable all afternoon and you cannot keep frightening the subordinates" type of silent care than anything.

Also, I want to add Crocodile almost murdering a man one day because they were doing business with him on his ship and he had a lot of lights on (when he was asked not to) and both Mihawk and Buggy were visibly uncomfortable the second they entered the room. I love protective Crocodile. He looks like he'd just murder men without any remorse for talking shit about the other two. I like it.

#i would apologize and say i focused more on the romance than on the headcanon but #have you considered that i had a lot of fun writing this and that they're in love #i am a very intense cross guild shipper i know it doesn't seem like it bc i barely post about them but i am #also really great headcanons about their chronic pain that i will never forget #one piece #dracule mihawk #buggy the clown #sir crocodile #cross guild

[fairyhaos]

seventeen and firefighters

requested by anon: "Hiii, can you do svt as firefighters, I was watching chicago fire and wondering what would svt be like in the au"

notes: okay i know absolutely nothing about firefighters so i found a bunch of firefighter duties online and just gave them to whichever member i thought they fit best. probably a mix of american + british firefighter policies.

masterlist

seungcheol:

has been the captain during at least 2 different major fire events in the city during his time as a firefighter. definitely that heroic guy in movies who runs back into a burning building bc there's still this one child who didn't make it out. visits the child in hospital, accidentally becomes a part-time parent to several other children in the ward. the one who teaches the new recruits how to slide down the fireman's pole bc the other guys would definitely teach it wrong to see them get blisters on their fingers just for funsies

jeonghan:

is somehow always on duty when the old ladies call for fire safety checks in their houses. spends half the time gossiping with them about their daily lives + what they were like n who had the most drama back in the day. probably has the email addresses of like 6 different lovely old ladies bc they loved talking to him so much, gets treated like he's their angelic little son by all of them. weak asf, no one knows how he actually managed to become a firefighter

joshua:

accompanied seungcheol on both of those major fire accidents, and despite not being the captain he was the man interviewed by the news reporters cz he was the only one who was (somehow) relatively clean of soot. claims it's bc he's so pure and nice so the dirt can't touch him, was almost punched by seungcheol on live tv. goes round to schools and gives talks on fire safety and stuff. laughs at jeonghan when the guy comes back from a house visit with yet another email address to add to his book

junhui:

probably mostly just does responses to medical calls and non-fire emergencies, bc i don't think i'd trust this guy to put out a fire without accidentally making it worse. one time, he had to go to some corporate building bc someone was stuck in the elevator, and as soon as he's saved the woman she'd handed him a business card and asked if he was interested in working as a model for their company

hoshi:

gets the most excited when they have a fire emergency call. is super pumped bc this is why he became a firefighter in the first place, bc he wants to fight fires n not just write papers on how to fight fires. is the only one that's not extremely exhausted at the end of it, ends up being the one to reassure the civilians that everything is okay now bc the other members are just way too tired to deal with the public

wonwoo:

tbh he's not really sure how he ended up in the firefighting business. does police assist duties more often, setting up traffic cones and handing out shock blankets and sometimes towing vehicles. drags hoshi away from the civilians to prevent him from beaming ridiculously wide whilst he tells them that people were seriously injured in the fire they just helped out at

woozi:

the one called to do rescue service jobs the most often. has saved cats from trees, dogs from trees, squirrels from houses, bats from barns, bees from backyards, practically everything you can think of. is one of the most capable during fire response tho bc he can actually hold up the rlly heavy water hose while the others are doing other firefighter stuff

minghao:

does most of the paperwork after incidents have occurred bc none of the other members can be bothered to do them. gives the worst and best pep talks at the same time. tells them that this is their duty n they've sworn to protect the people and they are going to do well, but in the same breath tells them there's always a likelihood that they're gonna die early bc of their job. they still don't know why he's the one always assigned to give pep talks

mingyu:

the Big Guy. gets trusted w most of the heavy lifting bc he's so tall and everything, and does the most active fire fighting bc he's actually capable of holding up the fire hose for extended periods of time. has also 100% hit his head on the doorway of the fire truck before in his haste to get into the vehicle after they've gotten a call, was laughed at for the entire journey to the site

dokyeom:

gets scared during the drive to a fire that they've been called to put out bc "what if we end up dying there????" even though he went through all the training and he's actually going to be fine. doesn't like using the fireman's pole, generally tries to stay on the ground floor so he'll never have to slide down it if they're called to an emergency. has once paused in putting out a fire to rescue a cat from a tree across the street

seungkwan:

idk probably yells for civilians to move out of the way while he n the rest of the firefighters are getting from the truck to the building that's on fire. was once one of the fighters to help with this one incident with chlorine gas malfunction in a swimming pool centre, tells the story to every person he ever meets. gets rlly honoured if he's walking down the streets n someone recognises him from rescue that he's done before

vernon:

somehow always loses rock paper scissors and has to be the one to lead the equipment check in the trucks while they're not on duty. has probably run into burning buildings before bc he thought the others were telling him to when in fact they were telling seungcheol not to run into the burning building. still thinks it's rlly fascinating and rlly terrifying when he sees a roof collapse in on itself while all up in flames

chan:

watches firefighter movies n shows just to point out all the inaccuracies, but now unintentionally has gotten himself hooked on just about all of them. if someone is injured during a fire site that he's worked on, he Will take time out of his day to visit them in the hospital they've been sent to, bc he wants them to know that firefighters really do care about the lives that are endangered that they've helped save

request guidelines

#fairyhaos.works #seventeen #svt #seventeen fic #seventeen drabble #seventeen headcanons #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #svt fluff #kpop writing #scoups #seungcheol #jeonghan #joshua hong #hong jisoo #junhui #hoshi #soonyoung #wonwoo #woozi #jihoon #minghao #the8 #mingyu #dokyeom #seokmin #seungkwan #hansol #vernon #chan

[shinsoup]

Hi! I liked your work about Katsuki and I wanna make a request now). Imagine like fem reader has lava quirk, and in childhood, when she only got it, she wound herself and got big burn scar on her leg, like a little bit below the knee to just above the foot, I hope you understand me. She's really insecure about it and always wears pants or skirt with stockings. She's dating Katsuki about few months and still doesn't want to show it, but ofc he notices it. Reader in A class too btw. English is not my native language, sorry for mistakes. Thank you🥰

always

☆ summary ☆ bakugo helps his girlfriend realize how beautiful she actually is.

☆ warnings ☆ cursing, soft bakugo (run) , lava quirk ! fem reader

☆ word count ☆ 875

you started dating bakugo a couple months ago, the blonde actually asking you out after weeks of being close friends.

you loved bakugo.

how he would stay up late making you food because he didn’t want you “eating that junky shit from the vending machine.”

or how he would play with your hair—sometimes tugging teasingly to get on your nerves.

but with all the times you’ve slept over, or went to change—you always wore pants or hid in the bathroom.

sometimes the long shorts you were wearing would rise up, causing you to quickly yank them down and hope your boyfriend didn’t notice.

it’s not like you thought bakugo would judge you, but sometimes he came off harsher than he thought.

never towards you, but to others.

the names he would call izuku, or the punches he would give to eijiro whenever the red head made a remark.

“y/n?” bakugo’s voice called, waving his hand in front of your face making you snap out of it.

“hm?” you hummed, turning your head towards him and giving him a small smile.

your leg was itchy and on fire, not literally. but after the incident your scar would still throb and burn, causing you to lather it with lotion almost everyday.

“you aren’t paying attention,” he sighed, leaning back and running his hands over his face, an aggravated groan leaving his lips.

“i’m sorry,” you frowned, “these jeans are just…really itchy.”

katsuki got up abruptly and shoved his textbook into his bag, then going to take your hand and drag you away from the library table.

“kats wha-”

“we’re going back to my dorm.”

you let him drag you in silence, chewing on your bottom lip as your mind raced—your leg feeling like it was set on fire.

bakugo lead you into his room before sitting you on his bed, standing in front of you with his arms crossed over his chest.

“what’s going on?” he asked, eyes narrowed onto yours as your brows furrowed together.

“what’re you talking about, kats?” you mumbled, your hands going down to scratch at your leg, a bad habit you’ve picked up throughout the years.

“stop that.”

“stop what?”

“stop scratching your leg,” he spat, going to grab your wrist and pull it away, he was gentle though.

he was always gentle with you.

“i know why you do that,” he added, his fingers not leaving your wrist as his other hand went to hover over your leg.

“i’ve seen it before.”

your eyes widened as your mouth went agap, bakugo hesitating to lay his hand over your leg.

“why do you hide it from me?”

you knew one day he’d ask, bring back memories that were shoved deep inside you. but you never expected it to be so soon.

“i j-just…” you trailed off before letting out a sigh, “think it’s ugly.”

katsuki’s eyebrows perked up as his mouth went agap, his fingers soon coming up to flick you in the head—causing you to whine and glare at him.

“don’t ever call yourself ugly, you understand?”

“b-but,” you tried defending yourself but he was quick to cut you off.

“i don’t date ugly people. and my girlfriend is sure as hell far from ugly—you’re the most beautiful goddamn woman i’ve seen in my life.”

although he was scowling and trying to act tough, you could tell he meant every word he said, softness laced in his voice as he ran his finger soothingly up and down your leg.

“what about my scar?” you whispered after a moment of silence, bakugo letting his eyes wander down to your jeans that covered your legs.

he let his fingers come up to play with the button, his eyes looking into yours as he waited for your consent.

you gave him a small nod, bakugo then carefully undoing the button before pulling them down your legs, your arms moving back onto the bed to help lift your butt up.

although some would see this as a sexual gesture—it was far from it. katsuki made sure to make you feel safe and comfortable with him, not overstepping any boundaries.

he finally revealed the scar that laid large on your leg, a wince leaving your lips out of habit.

“this scar is a reminder of how strong you are,” he said, leaning down to kiss the tender skin before looking up at you, “you should wear it with pride.”

“…besides, you look fucking hot with it.”

you slapped him playfully as a giggle escaped your lips, bakugo smiling as he reached up to peck your forehead.

“you really mean that, kats?”

“which part? because yes you look hot as hell-”

you shoved him with a smile before running your fingers through his hair, his hand still resting on your bare leg as you scratched his scalp.

“all of it,” you whispered, playfully taking a piece of hair and tugging softly, making him crack a smile.

“always.”

#bakugo katuski #mha bakugou #my hero academia #bakugo fanfic #bakugo fic #bakugo imagine #bakugo x you #bakugo x reader

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

‘’If you can’t handle a heart like mine, don’t waste your time with me.’’ with reader saying it to Marcus please Ik not getting requests is frustrating but I love your weit bf style

I've based this song on one of my favorite Nessa Barrett song 'Lovebombs' (another fic inspired by her music is in my wip). Please look her up!

—

Marcus was your favorite person, but that also made him your favorite target. It’s not what you wanted. That deep attachment made you a very loyal partner, but it had a reverse side. An ugly side.

You didn’t remember how it started — something must’ve set you off. All you remembered was being in the middle of the fight and feeling this intense hatred toward Marcus. You lashed out on him, told him horrible things. Your words had been bullets to his chest, hitting and hurting him in all the right places.

‘’Why do you keep doing this?’’ He was trying to hold it together, knowing if he let his emotion mix with yours, it would be a molotov cocktail.

‘’It’s the way I am, Marcus!’’ you snapped at him, feeling the anger inside you turn into fire. ‘’Sorry that I’m not a perfect girlfriend like Ginny. Sorry that I’m a constant ticking time bomb and ruin dates and parties.’’

‘’Why do you keep bringing Ginny into every argument?’’

The corner of your lips curled into a crooked smile. ‘’That’s an interesting question, uh? I’m not the one that still has pictures of her in my bedroom.’’

Marcus groaned. Shit. You saw them. ‘’I forgot to take them off. They don’t mean anything.’’

‘’Do you imagine her face when we have sex?’’

‘’What?!’’ Half of him wanted to laugh at your ridiculous question, but he bit his tongue. It would only add fuel to the fire. ‘’I can’t believe you’re asking me this… I love you, not Ginny. Can you stop making things up?’’

The sad truth was, you couldn't. Jumping to conclusion, blowing things out of proportion and overreacting was something you were trying really hard to control. It was unfortunately part of your mental illness.

‘’If you can’t handle a heart like mine, don’t waste your time on me.’’

Marcus punched the bridge of his nose and sighed, trying to find something to say that you won’t turn around on him. ‘’I’m not saying— I just want to understand you.’’

‘’I can’t understand myself so, good luck with that.’’ A manic laugh spilled from your mouth.

A few days had passed and an intense guilt filled your body. The war was finally over. A part of you was relieved, but the other was realizing the damages you had caused. All the pain you had caused to the person you loved the most.

With your head hung low, you knocked on Marcus’ door and waved the white flag. He accepted your apologies and wrapped you in his arms, glad the storm was finally over.

‘’I know I’m hard to love sometimes and that I make you the villain of my story. I’m sorry. I really am, Marcus. You don’t deserve all the pain I put you through. It’s not fair to pull you into my chaos.’’ Your eyes were glassy, thinking back at all the horrible things you had said to him the other night. 

He pulled back and tipped your face gently. ‘’When you love someone, you love them regardless of the whole baggage they come with.’’

You looked down. ‘’You say that now, but you’ll change your mind.’’

Marcus shook his head. ‘’Not a chance. I can handle the mean things. I’ve got thick skin.’’ He gave you a soft smile, but you didn’t reciprocate it. 

 ‘’What I said about Ginny—’’

‘’Is all forgiven and forgotten,’’ he finished, shushing you. ‘’I haven't been the most faithful person before, but I love you and that's what makes all the difference to me. I don't care that you're not perfect because I'm not either. I do impulsive things, smoke too much weed and some days I can't bring myself to leave my bed or shower. We're imperfect and it's okay. Perfect people are boring anyway.’’

—

All and more taglist: @spiokybirdstarfish @kenqki @liidiaaag @hawkegfs  @gillybear17  @areaderinlove @acornacreacure @black-rose-29 @fudge13 @cece05 @rosie-cameron @Caxddce @laylasbunbunny 

#marcus baker #marcus baker x reader #marcus baker imagine #marcus baker x you #felix mallard #ginny and georgia #marcus ginny & georgia #ginny & georgia imagine

[thewildsophia]

OK KO, Let's be Heroes!//KO x Older Sibling!Reader

A/N: I can't believe this hasn't been written before omg. I had the thought of an older sibling reader to KO rolling around in my head while watching the series and was shocked to find no fanfics with the premise. So I did it myself.

NOTE: The Reader's powers are basically Portgas D. Ace's from One Piece. If you aren't familiar, I've attached a few gifs to give you an idea of what it's like.

Word Count: 2026

"Read More Link" placed due to length.

So I can’t think of a realistic way for Reader to be a biological older sibling to KO considering the timeline of what happened.

Soooooooo…You took on the role of KO’s older sibling, even though you’re not related by blood.

[Insert tragic backstory here] and Carol had found you when you were a young teenager wandering about without a home to go to. When she found that out about you, she couldn’t in good conscience leave you alone, so she…adopted you basically. There wasn’t any paperwork involved so you just unofficially become her second child.

Carol was SHOOK when she found out about your superpower (and that’s putting it lightly, she was freaking out--).

It happened when she failed to light the fire underneath her stove a few days after you came to live with her and KO. Not thinking much about it, you held your finger up and lit the fire yourself. When she turned and saw the small fire burning on the tip of your finger she freaked tf out thinking you were hurt. 

A one-hour explanation later, she was now on board as to what power you have: You’re made out of fire and can set other things on fire just by looking at them. You even showed her some of your moves the next day faaaaar away from anything flammable. 

Carol encouraged you to become a hero and with her help you eventually did. You became a decently high-ranking hero at a young age, clocking in at level 6. 

There were a LOT of companies trying and failing to recruit you, but you chose to stay home with Carol and KO (no Carol is NOT crying-).

KO was quite young when you were “adopted,” being around 3 or 4 at the time. Because of that, he always assumed that you were his older sibling by blood and it wasn’t until one day between ages 6 to 11 that Carol told him the truth.

My boy was shocked, but it didn’t change anything between your dynamic. 

In fact, you became even more of an inspiration to him on his path to becoming a hero!

You helped Carol a lot at the fitness dojo until Carol got KO a job at Gar’s, to which Carol also had you hired to keep an eye on KO. Not that she didn’t trust him, she just knew that he could get in over his head sometimes and wanted to have someone be there to protect him. 

Talking about Gar’s, Rad and Enid absolutely ADORE you. You’re the unofficial manager appointed by them truly because you are a few levels higher than them. 

At first, when they heard they were getting two new coworkers, they didn’t think much of it. You and KO seemed nice enough so they didn’t mind having you around. 

It’s not until the Darell robot for the day comes busting into the plaza that their opinion changes. 

Just ask KO is about to get absolutely decked by Darell, you zoomed onto the scene in a blaze of fire and punched the bot, setting it on fire while also hitting it with enough force to send it back to Boxmore with KO nestled into your other arm. 

“Nobody ever touched my little brother.” You muttered under your breath while wrapping KO into your arms further to soothe him. You walk past a stunned Rad and Enid as you enter the store and get back to work.

That day, Rad and Enid also became your younger siblings. Pestering you with questions like “How did you get so strong?” and “Where did you get that power from?” Considering you’re a year or two older and much stronger you embraced the title with honor.

You actually became a little bit of a local celebrity after working at Gar’s for a while. People, locals really, would occasionally come in a ask to take a picture with you. Abashed, you said yes every time because you really couldn’t say no. Real Magic Skeleton even has a picture of you on his site with a small bio (You blushed so hard when you found out you thought you were gonna explode).

Speaking of which, KO LOVES to flaunt you around and hype you up, much to your embarrassment. He says stuff like, “Look at my cool amazingly strong older sibling!” and “My older sibling could beat up your older sibling!” 

KO means well, but he embarrasses the shit out of you.

MAD PROTECTIVE. If Carol is protective then you are on another level entirely. If someone even says something mean about KO it’s on sight. People learned very quickly that you are KO’s older sibling and that you will not hesitate to DIE to protect him (KO prays that it never comes to that).

I could see a rude customer coming in and harassing KO about Cob knows what and you just come up behind them and punch them out of the store. When Mr. Gar confronted you about it, you held your ground and stated proudly what you had done. He was honestly surprised at your resolve and didn’t punish you at all, saying “You should stick up for yourself and the ones you love.”

Lord Boxman even became a little weary about attacking the plaza knowing that you worked there and you are a pretty strong defender. That doesn’t stop him, of course, but he does strategize to combat you better.

Professor Venomous encourages Boxman to capture you and “convert” you to villainy since your power is something that could be very useful to them. You’ve heard people throughout your life make comments about how “villainous” your power is, but you never let it get to your head since you know who you are and that’s all that matters. 

Taking. Naps. Together. Seriously, if KO ever doses off during one of his shifts, you’re quick to follow him. You’ll scoop him up into your arms and sit down somewhere in the corner and fall asleep with him. Rad and Enid think it’s absolutely adorable and have several pictures of you two.

Rad and Enid will even join your cuddle pile in the break room when time permits (or when they make the time themselves).

KO will even occasionally crawl into your bed at home and sleep with you there. He says that your bed is more comfortable than his, but you really know he gets lonely sometimes.

Piggyback rides! KO loves to lounge on your shoulders and back and will often hang off of you as he does with Rad. 

You’re also just used to the feeling of holding/carrying KO that it sometimes feels weird when you haven’t for a while.

When you met TKO for the first time you kinda panicked like many of the other plaza members. It was an especially stressful time in your life (and probably much more for Carol).

TKO wasn’t that fond of you either which made everything 10x harder to deal with. He didn’t actively dislike you, it was more like he wanted nothing to do with you.

Once KO came out of that initial swap between himself and TKO, you didn’t really think much about it. 

When he mentioned some “Shadowy Figure” though you immediately began to do as much research as you could on the guy, you were determined to beat the crap out of this guy (if not kill him-).

Listening to KO cry into your and Carol’s arms blabbering about, “I’m so sorry!” and “I don’t know what he did to me!” You honestly thought this man had touched KO (I know I’m not the only one…right??). It took a lot of coaxing, but you eventually managed to understand what happened when KO told you the full story.

It’s not until Dendy begins to monitor KO and TKO that you start to give his alter much thought. You encourage KO to pursue research into his darker ego, assuming he’s okay with it of course, and offer to be someone he can talk to about it if he isn’t comfortable talking to anyone else about it. 

During some of these talks, you open up about yourself a bit to KO to make him feel better and let him know that the negative emotions he feels are normal. 

During some of the more intimate conversations, you tell him how you used to hurt people and even kill at times before Carol took you in.

KO doesn’t believe you at first. How could someone so kind and loving have killed in their life? You use that to help you explain that good people do bad things sometimes, but that doesn’t make them a bad person. 

You teach him that TKO isn’t something that he should be ashamed of and cage up in the back of his mind, but could instead be someone to rely on in times of need.

He feels a lot better after you tell him all of this.

Hugging and holding KO close to you during nights when he feels really bad about himself. Where he doubts his ability to become a good hero and to be able to harness TKO’s powers. 

You’d rock him back in forth in his bed while quietly soothing him over his crying. He asked you not to tell Mommy and you promised him that he had your word.

I could honestly see Reader lying to cover up KO’s tracks. Like KO is caught doing something he absolutely should not be doing and instead of immediately admitting fault, you would come up with some realistic yet unfeasible lie that only works about 50% of the time.

KO loves to spar with you! He learned most of his physical skills from you, stuff like punching, jumping, kicking, and all that fun stuff. You’ve never used your fire powers against him though.

There was one incident where Boxmore accidentally found out what your weakness is, that being water. A Shannon bot had thrown you into the little kiddie pool Rad and Enid had set up before the attack started.

When you jumped out of the pool soaking wet and unable to start a fire, the stupid sibling trio laughed and mocked you. Enid was quick to come in with a kick to Raymond’s head and you soon found your footing.

Boxmore learned that day not to underestimate you as even without your powers you’re still a physically strong hero.

However, it would seem that Boxman and Professor Venomous stored that data about you since some of the bots they send are equipped with water guns. You’ve gotten pretty good at dodging them, so that’s kinda cool.

You do remember one time after KO had gotten a handle over TKO where you had been drenched with a bucket of water and right as you were about to get socked by Raymond, KO had pushed you out of the way and dodged the punch himself.

You had never been more proud of KO than in that moment and you made that known to him after the fight. You ran up to him and cradled him in your arms talking about how proud you were and that he was becoming such a fine hero (that last one got him to blush a little).

Rad and Enid definitely took a picture of this and then proceeded to print out a copy and put it in the break room.

When you and KO found out that your mom was dating Mr. Gar, you both were a little unsure about how you felt. When Rad and Enid asked about it, they asked the two of you together and then asked you separately. 

Seeing as you’re the older sibling they thought that you would have had a better idea of how you feel about the whole arrangement and were bummed out when they realized that you really didn’t know how you felt. 

After the date you four hosted for Carol and Mr. Gar, both you and KO see how happy Mr. Gar makes your mom and decide that if she’s happy then you’re happy as well.

KO is honestly one of the best younger brothers you could ever ask for. He’s kind and selfless and wants to help others when he can. And in return, you are the best older sibling that KO could ever ask for.

Sorry the format looks off in some places, Tumblr just makes booty juice decisions like limiting the character limit per block to 4096 words...

#ok ko #ok ko let's be heroes #ok ko x reader #ok ko let's be heroes x reader #KO x reader #Enid x reader #Rad x reader #Radicles x reader #carol x reader #sibling reader #thewildsophia writes

[dogtoling]

What is art fight? Do all you artists just. Punch in face

ok it's slightly better than that. As a quick introduction, Art Fight is a website with a yearly event that takes place every year in July. Very simply put, you make an account there, upload whatever OCs you have and want to display on there, and then just sit and wait around until July pops up. A week or so before the event starts, there is a theme reveal (this year the teams are Vampire and Werewolf), and people may choose a team to join, or be randomly assigned to a team after the event starts.

For the event itself, the objective is to "attack" artists that are on the opposing team by drawing their OCs. Attacking people on the other team nets your team points, which are tallied at the end of the event. But to be honest I feel like no one cares about which team actually wins. That might be "the objective", but really the objective is doing gift art and trades largely with strangers on the internet and making their day, and maybe getting surprise art in return!

When you attack someone, people might attack you back by drawing your OC, which begins something called a revenge chain! So that's when you're doing art trades (for people who have never heard the term art trade before because i've realized deviantart isn't hip or mainstream anymore, an art trade is an occasion where two artists draw a thing for each other). Not everyone does revenges though and ESPECIALLY not chains, so the main draw of the event is gift art. In general expecting stuff back tends to set people up for disappointment, especially if attacking the same team. Drawing OCs from your own team counts as "friendly fire", and while your team still gets points for it, you get DRAMATICALLY less points than you would for drawing for the opposing team. Either way it is a thing that you CAN still do.

The amount of points you get from an attack depends on the medium (which include stuff that isn't just drawing!), level of finish and polish, the general complexity of the art, the amount of characters in the piece et cetera. You determine these categories yourself while posting your attack, so it can be a bit daunting if you're not sure on things.

Art Fight recently introduced tag search, which lets you tag your OCs with specific tags (for example, "splatoon", "furry", "pokemon" or whatever) and search for characters with those same tags if you have preferences on what you want to draw. It also has some nifty other things, like the ability to customize your profile sometimes to insane degrees if you want, the ability to set permissions for characters (what people are and are not allowed to do with them), a storage for hiding characters if you want to retire them for a specific year but don't want to delete and re-add them later, the ability to link stuff to character profiles such as their toyhouse or full reference sheets, fields for crediting artists for the design or art if you got it from somebody else... et cetera. It also has some achievements, if you're into that kind of stuff.

The barrier of entry is really kind of low and the event is very versatile - you can go the whole fight making pixel sprite attacks, you can do 3D models, you can do halfbodies, you could even just do sketches and call it a day and that's all very valid and usually always fun. Personally I find Art Fight really fun because not only do you get to pick characters to draw that you might never have seen otherwise, but also have a completely good excuse to draw other people's characters and make their day. I usually spend a lot of Art Fight trying out different art styles and dabbling in stuff I normally do less, and don't have much motivation to do with my own characters - for example, last year I did digital art, painting, pixel sprites, pixel animation, 3D modeling and 3D animation and yeah I wouldn't have done any of those without the Art Fight excuse of "yeah why not draw this guy's OC". So it's also a really good way to step out of what you usually do with your art, and try different styles or mediums just to see what it's about.

And of course, the most important tidbit: the site is always, and I mean always, EVERY year, down at the start of the event. Every year the first week of Art Fight the site is completely unusable. The good news is, you can join Art Fight even in the middle of the event, and joining the site doesn't require you to partake in every upcoming Art Fight or even to pick a team. You can simply spectate and not partake one year, then come back the next and pick a team. TL;DR it's fun.

#mailbox #that clears up things .i hope. #art fight

[shotgunbunny]

Imagine Lloyd shaves the stache off. Random evening wearing a sweat set and no stache.

༻𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐲༺

I would cry if Lloyd ever shaved his moustache that's his signature look😭 this is part of the bodyguard Au!

(Warnings!! References to smut!! Dark Lloyd but reader doesn't know!! LLOYD WITHOUT HIS TRASH STACHE UM THATS A WARNING!! Gore?!! fluff!! Lloyd basing his entire personality off loving reader 😌)

You had come home from a long day of shopping with your other bodyguard. Lloyd was busy tending to other matters, what they were you had no clue. But he offered you his card yesterday so that you can buy yourself some pretty things, saying that for you, there was absolutely no limit and you could spend however much you wanted. You entered the house and headed to your room, exhausted. You took his words literally.

You spent alot of his money on clothes you knew he would adore. He often liked choosing what you had to wear, like his own doll. Yet everytime he called you doll, he end up with a shoe or a pillow thrown at him. You despised being called doll. It made you feel like an object. So Lloyd often refrained from calling you it, yet sometimes it slipped out and you'd give him the silent treatment.

You layed on your bed, all your limbs sprawled out on the soft sheets waiting for Lloyd to come home from his stupid busy work. Then you could get him to take your heels off and give you a foot massage. And maybe some kisses and cuddles but the foot massage was necessary. Wearing 6 inch heels for a while was exhausting.

While you were debating on going for a nap, Lloyd was dealing with his business. Aka killing people. The Fredret brothers had been causing trouble recently, and so Lloyd had to snuff them out. You see there were whispers that one of the brothers were to marry you, and if one didn't the other would. So he had to eradicate them so that they wouldn't get your beautiful hand in marriage. That was his.

So all morning he was hunting both the brothers down, both causing hassle in their own way. The first one led Lloyd on a pointless chase which inevitably ended up with him simply getting in his car and mowing anything in his way, until he saw the first brother and ran his legs over. He gagged him and shoved him in the boot.

Then after he dropped him off at his mansion, he tied and gagged him before heading out for the second brother. It was easy enough, but the hassle he caused was the lighter in his hand. Lloyd made the mistake of getting cocky and just as he was leaning in to whisper something witty, a click was heard and his beloved moustache was alight.

Let's just say that brother got a beating. He dragged him to his mansion too and then began by lighting his top lip on fire and watching him squeal. Then he ripped the tongue from the other brother. Lloyd was then bored and shot them both in the head while shouting angrily at the staff to clean up.

He groaned, aggravated over his moustache yet relieved knowing there would be no more talks of marrying you. He stomped to his room and to the bathroom suite attached. He wanted to punch the mirror over what he was about to do, but he needed the fucking mirror. He put shaving cream on his top lip and began shaving what was left of his signature look.

He hated it, he didn't recognise himself and he knew you were definitely gonna hate it too. But it was worth it. So worth it if it meant you would become Mrs.Hansen soon. He styled his hair trying to adjust it so he looked better and then he punched the mirror. He headed to his room with a sigh and then he changed into something more appropriate.

You heard a car pulling up and you felt butterflies errupt in your stomach. Lloyd was here! At last you could finally have your peace and stop stressing about foot cramps you knew were bound to come. You listened intently to the front door opening, the pause of Lloyd taking his coat off and then the sound of his heavy footsteps on the stairs.

The door opened and there he was, yet you stared at him intently. He turned and closed the door and looked back at you. And then at all the shopping bags, a smirk drew on his lips and you stared longer trying to decipher what was going on. "Good day shopping princess?" You blinked slowly, "Lloyd?" He raised an eyebrow at you. "Who else would it be baby?"

You kicked your shoes off and looked at him a second longer, "You look so, I don't know different? But you don't look like Lloyd. What did you do?" He rolled his eyes at your dramatics and sat on your bed, dragging your feet onto his lap and massaging your tensed up feet. You moaned and he chuckled. "Business happened princess, I know you're gonna miss my clit tickler buy-" You gasped. "Lloyd! Don't call it that!" He laughed, "Then what am I to call it baby?" You giggled, "The porn stache."

He straddled you and gave you a warning look. You stared at his lips curiosity got ahold of you and you kissed him. You missed the feeling of his moustache against your top lip. Yet this was still wonderful there was no ticking sensation, just feel of your skin pressed together. You pulled away and he chased your lips forward, you put your index finger on his lips making him pout.

You giggled at him, you nudged your thumb to the side watching his beautiful eyes follow the direction. "Thank you for letting me use your card baby." He looked down at you a soft smile painting his face making him look like an angel, without his signature look, he looked more innocent. "Get use to it baby, one day you'll be Mrs. Hansen and that card will be yours. All I ask is that you model for your dear old husband." You pecked his lips beaming at him. "You know I will bubba!"

He leaned down and pressed kisses to your face, litterering them across your face almost like he was kissing invisible freckles. You pulled him away and gave him a serious look to which he raised his eyebrow, "Just know that if you ever come into my room without telling me you've changed your appearance, I'll hit you." He nuzzled your noses before you pulled him away. "I'm serious Lloyd deception isn't sexy." He rolled his eyes and kissed the breathe out of you.

#lloyd hansen x plus size reader #lloyd hansen x you #lloyd hansen x innocent!reader #lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen x reader #lloyd hansen x black reader #lloyd hansen x y/n #dark lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen drabble #lloyd hansen fluff #anon ask

[tarotreaderbabe]

How to connect to joy

Pick a pile for some tips that will help nourish your soul and heal from some specific issues.

Pile one

Get out of contemplation mode a bit. You're too much in your head, get into your body. You need to reconnect with yourself and with your inner fire as well. You might be suffering from fatigue, procrastination, stress, etc. Your themes are grounding, empowerment, loosening up, energy and motivation, movement.

Connect with Red Jasper. Set the intention for it to connect you with your empowered self. for it to ground and liberate you at the same time.

Have red rose petals at home? It have a similar energy with red jasper. It is grounding, helps one feel more alive, but it's a more emotional, peaceful energy. Maybe you could work with both. A tea made of organic rose petals is delicious and energetically divine.

Don't have any of the above? Maybe into cooking? Make a recipe that goes potatoes + tomato in it. These are actually quite grounding. A latte full of cinnamon can do the trick as well, and it's tasty.

Into essential oils? Create a massage oil with sandalwood. You simply won't regret it.

DANCE! Really, connect with that playful side of yours and allow yourself to move without any inhibitions. Connect with your own intimacy, play with your body a little.

Pile two

Dear, you have been suffering from excess of fiery energy. Maybe you can relate to the following issues: anger, rudeness, irritability, mood swings, extreme sensitivity, jealousy maybe... You need to connect with a softer energy :)

Pink candles, pink flowers, pink crystals, all these can support you right now. I believe something very motherly and gentle like geranium essential oil can really help soothe and calm you down, if you have it at home. Rose quartz, as well.

Cool down by being a bit more in nature, a little bit more in silence, away from stress and chaos. Spend time relaxing. If you have lavender flowers around, make a tea.

Something a bit more simple you can do is a thank you list. Think about a few people that have helped you, even if you can't connect with it emotionally yet. Write a letter to them, expressing yourself a bit to how they have helped you and thanking them. You can even write this to yourself too if you struggle with self punishment. Slowly this will melt the barriers in your heart.

There is a concept in DBT that is: opposite action. It helps with emotional regulation. If you feel the need to yell at someone, for example, try to speak softly and calmly. If you feel the need to punch your brother in the face, hug him. This will take a bit of discipline but you can do it :)

Pile three

You have some real issues with communication, don't you? I see someone that is cyclical in nature, but they are completely unaware of it. Sometimes you want to talk, sometimes you want to withdraw. That's fine!!! You really don't need to push yourself to talk if you're not into it. Just notice if this happens because you are simply not into it, or because you're triggered with something. Maybe you have some quirks you dislike as well.

Check your Mercury in your natal chart. It will provide some extra details about your communication style.

Throat chakra healing, folks!!! Listen to frequencies for the throat chakra, or even some crystal healing could be useful. Essential oils are great.

Some special tips: work with tools that help your specific issue. If you're explosive in your communication, geranium can help a lot as it helps communicate with kindness. If you're have authenticity issues, sodalite then. If you have problems with articulation, sage. How you do it is up to you, as this type of healing is very personal.

Take care! ;)

#pac #pick a card #pick a pile #tarot reading #witchblr

[credince--writes]

Tabasco

AO3

Something Jitters noticed, albeit slowly, was that it seemed Ghost never seemed to leave.

Unless it was on a mission of course.

Sometimes she would forget that he was there, only to have the life scared out of her when he rounded a corner and almost bumped into her.

A lot of the time it made sense.

The first time, Gaz, Price, and Soap would be going somewhere to do something to the tone of undercover work.

It's hard to be undercover with a skull mask on your face.

So, it left the two of them alone in the base.

The first day, she avoided him. Maybe not intentionally, but she had no real way to know how to feel about him. He was, in essence, a big scary fucker with a skull mask who killed people for his occupation.

She would still be providing some very basic assistance to the team from afar, making sure nothing had come in through the enemy communications that would signal for the mission being compromised.

Usually, it starts out with little things.

Additional punctuation in messages can signal for something is wrong.

She didn't know how- but Gaz had managed to pick up a bag of bagels. Even told her to eat as many as she wanted while he was gone, no use in letting them get moldy was his reasoning.

So she happily obliged, while yea, she was hesitant at first, she decided to take him up on his offer. Cutting the bread and then placing it in the toaster oven she quickly returned to her office corner and keep checking up on the communications.

A particular snippet of a phone call caught her attention, and she began to slip down the rabbit hole of analyzing the messages around it.

By the time she had looked up from the screen, a plate with a bagel was set at the end of her desk. She looked around, not realizing Ghost must've brought it in when she was working.

Heat crept up onto her face, he must think she was an idiot- or at least reaffirm the premise of it being so. Forgetting it in the toaster oven, walking off, and getting busy.

At least it didn't catch fire.

But, she couldn't help but notice the butter carefully spread across the surface of each piece.

She should remember to thank him later.

...

Wandering through the halls, she stopped to find herself walking into the training room to hunt down the source of noise- hopefully assuming it to be Ghost and not an intruder.

To which, she was grateful for him being the large but familiar man even if he was brooding in the corner.

"Hey." She spoke, trying to catch his attention.

He stopped beating on a punching bag (the poor object) to turn and look at her, still wearing the skull-clad mask. However, instead of the normal long sleeve and gear he wore, he wore a simple black T-shirt.

Didn't know he had any tattoos.

She assumed his eye contact was the only kind of acknowledgment or greeting she would get.

"Thanks for saving the bagel, earlier." She started. His lack of verbal acknowledgment only added to the awkwardness of her conversation.

"Didn't want to have to deal with a fire, now would we?" He responded.

A hint of something twirled around in his voice,

amusement maybe.

"Yea..." She laughed a little, feeling the heat rise back up to her face. She reached her arm back to rub the back of her neck. "I got kinda caught up. You know?"

He nodded simply.

"So..." She tried to continue.

"Do you need something, Jitters?" He asks.

"No." She sighs. Faltering slightly, "Sorry." Before turning and leaving him alone in the training room.

She'd never been left alone with him for a full day if it could even be called being left with him.

But, she would admit the man was full of surprises.

She wasn't expecting to walk into the kitchen after finishing work for dinner to be finished and out on the table, even if it was just a singular serving for her.

He was nowhere to be seen, but it started a game of sorts to catch the man in the act of doing something so domestic.

He seemed to have a routine, wake up, lumber around for a while before going to the shooting range, coming back, finding a bagel in the toaster oven that Jitters forgot, and then when she would come to apologize (again) about her forgetfulness he would be doing something in the training room.

"Apologies don't count when you make a habit of it." He simply said to her.

"Sorry." She sighed, looking at her shoes. "So, do you always work out. Every day?" She asks.

"When I am not injured or on a mission, yes." He said bluntly, continuing to do pullups on a bar.

"You ever get bored?"

"No."

"I'd get bored."

"Hm."

"It ever get hard to breathe in that thing?" She asked.

"No."

"Am I testing your patience?"

"How'd you know?" He sighed out, dropping from the bar and turning to her. "Are you bored?" He asked.

"Incredibly." Jittered sighed, shrugging her shoulders. "Nothing interesting is coming through the comms."

"I am not your babysitter." He said plainly.

"Never said you were." She shot back.

"Bit defensive are we?" He questions, moving across the room to put away a weight he had been using earlier.

She grumbled a little, crossing her arms. "I didn't mean to. I just am starting to dislike being regarded as a baby."

He turned, looking at her. "Then do something about it."

She groaned. "Like what?"

"Don't know, I'm not a baby."

"God, you're an ass."

"Hm."

He moved about, and she found herself sitting against a wall in his company.

"Didn't know you had tattoos." She comments.

"Is that what they are?" He sarcastically asks.

"I thought you'd be more of the guy to get a tribal tattoo and nipple piercings, personally." She jokes.

"This was just the cover-up, you missed those." He held up his arm, keeping his back to her as she moved about.

She stood, making her way as quietly as she could up behind him, getting about ten feet away from him before he lifted his head.

"You're shit at sneaking around." He comments without turning his head.

She groans, before crumbling to the ground. "How?"

"You're not as quiet as you think."

"I think you got shark mirrors in that damn mask." She grumbles.

He stands, turning before walking up to her and poking her with the tip of his boot. "Get up."

She stands, begrudgingly, before following him to the center of the room onto a mat.

"Hit me." He stated.

A look of shock momentarily took over her features.

"Huh?"

"You heard me." He says.

She stands up straighter, adjusting her shoulders before throwing a punch into his chest.

As soon as she throws the punch his hand jerks out, grabbing her wrist and pulling her body forward, kicking her legs out from under her, sending her topping onto the mat below him.

Jitters groaned, looking up at him as he slightly leaned forward to look at her.

"What'd you do wrong?"

"Walked into the fuckin' room." She grumbles.

"Wrong."

"Threw a punch at the man literally named Ghost."

"Yes, and no. What did you do wrong with your punch?"

"I leaned too far forward so I was already off balance. Not that would've mattered with you manhandling me."

He nodded a bit. "So what should you do next time?"

"Bring a gun." She grumbled, rolling over onto her hands and knees to stand.

He let out a huff, something close to a laugh she could only assume.

"You and Johnny have been practicing, have you not?" He asked.

"No." She sighed, finally standing back up. "We've been dickin' around with the containers."

As soon as she stood, he stuck an arm out against her shoulders throwing her chest backward, leg swinging out and filing her back at the knees, sending her toppling back to the floor.

"Oh my God." She groaned, rolling over again. "No fair."

"You left yourself open." He responded back simply.

"Cold hard bastard." She laughs a little. Springing up suddenly she lunged forward, trying to grab hold of his waist and push him back.

Except it was like coming into contact with a wall.

"That's not going to work." He stated.

"Fuck this." She huffs, turning around. "No fair, no fun."

"Life isn't fair." Ghost shoots back at her.

As soon as he said that, she was running at him, leaping into the air and trying again, wrapping her arms and legs around his torso in another attempt to knock him off balance.

They were met in awkward silence, safe for Jitters huffing for breath under him. "This was gonna work better in my head."

"I can see that." He bluntly responds.

His body began to shift, before he completely toppled forward on top of her, dead weighting on her.

Thats when she really began to scramble about like a cat, wheezing out

'can't'

'bre-'

'heeathe...'

'hnnng'

'help'

'hunnnnng-

'unlc'

'uncle' she wheezes out.

With that, he stiffens his body back up, standing quickly and looking down at her.

She lay on her back gasping for breath.

....

A few days later, she finally caught him in the act.

Peeking her head in through the doorway, she watched as he cut an onion on the cutting board, potatoes boiling behind him.

His head didn't even lift before he called into the room. "Staring is rude."

She nearly fell dead on the floor at that moment, awkwardly standing and walking into the room with a face plastered with the look of 'shameful, but only because I was caught'

"It's just weird." She says, walking up and sitting down at one of the chairs at the dining table.

"What." He states.

"To see you cooking?" She asks aloud. "Just never saw you for someone to do that."

"Hm."

"Not that, like, you can't cook. All of the dinners, and food, in general, have been great." She adds quickly.

He doesn't respond, just continuing to cut.

"It's just weird to see you doing something so domestic?" She asks again. "But it's nice. You know."

"I don't." He replies.

"It's just a reminder that the big bad Ghost is human." She jokes, shooting him a grin. "Don't worry, I won't tell the others you're a better cook than Soap. Secret's safe with me." She laughs a little.

He remained silent, still.

"Do you need any help?" She asked.

"No." He responded.

She sighed, crossed her arms, and sat back in the chair.

By the time he had finished cooking, he stood with his plate, aiming to walk to whoever he enjoyed his meals in peace.

Leaving her alone at the dinner table once again.

...

The second time they were left alone together was only for a day, following up on previous leads had left the two together, she didn't even know he was in the building until she had stepped out to look at the sky and saw the man leaning up against the building, mask pulled up over his chin and to his nose smoking a cigarette.

"You know those are bad for you." She comments.

"So is getting shot." He mumbled, putting his light back in his pocket.

Maybe it was a threat?

She didn't want to find out necessarily.

The team ended up calling in, they'd be back in the morning, the weather had gotten nasty rather quickly and Price said he'd rather not be in another heli crash.

Ghosts word resonated with her to a degree, 'do something about it'

She might not be able to beat Ghost in a fight, but she could still take care of her body- to which she realized she hadn't been doing that well of a job as of late.

She had walked into the training room, finding it empty.

Call her a wimp, but she didn't directly see the appeal of lifting weights. They also didn't have weights that would work in the 'Jitters' category. Unless she felt like dragging around a fifty-pound kettlebell for the 'gains' there wasn't much there in the room for her.

The body stores trauma in physical ways.

So, she found herself on the mat in the center of the room stretching her legs, back, arms, anything she could remember from the old yoga poses she'd do in the kitchy classes she took in college.

The familiar feeling of the burning stretch in her legs, and in her back. All providing some relief. It felt as if she was physically releasing tension from her body as she did it. Taking deep breaths in and allowing the pain to flow out while she exhaled.

She'd be cackling at herself if she wasn't desperately trying to combat the pit in the bottom of her gut eating away at her.

She was homesick.

But not of her home,

she missed her old life.

She missed her bed.

Her hometown's weather.

Birds.

The look of the grass.

Nothing was the same here.

Maybe if she closed her eyes sometimes, like when she was in the shower with her head pressed up against the tile she could act as if she was home.

Maybe even a hotel.

Anywhere that wasn't a military base.

When she approached the kitchen she saw Ghost, in a semi-familiar position of cooking at the stove. A picture of muddled domesticity.

It worked roughly the same, this time him finishing up, making his plate and turning to leave.

"Ghost." She asked.

He stopped, and turned to look at her.

"Could you..." She grasped at the sleeve of her shirt. "Could you eat with me?" She asks him, shooting him a near-desperate glance.

He didn't respond at first. Almost mulling it over.

"I... I don't wanna eat alone." She explains.

He made his way over to the table, setting the plate down, and leaving, returning a short bit later with a single bottle of tabasco sauce, and a glass with an amber liquid inside of it. Sitting it down on the table, he pulled his mask up and ate with her in a comfortable silence.

She watched as he grabbed the bottle, splashing it onto his food for what seemed to be the fifth time.

"You like that stuff?" She asks.

He gives her a simple nod.

She laughs a little, "You just have one in your room?"

"Johnny would drink it if he found it." He says in between bites.

"The hot sauce or whatever is in your glass?"

"Both."

"What's in the glass?" She asks.

"Bourbon."

She nods and continues to eat.

...

The third time, the team had been released for a week. Return home, do as you like, visit the wife, the likes.

So, she had opted to sleep in- true teenager style. By the time she crawled out of bed, it was already two in the afternoon. And boy, did she feel great.

She wandered the building, not like she had a home to return to.

But Jitters soon noticed, she wasn't alone. the scent of a freshly smoked cigarette hung in the air. The ding of the toaster when she was in another room, the faucet dripping after being used.

But she couldn't corner him.

She tried, she really did, he really was living up to his name, he was a Ghost.

So, she assumed he didn't want to be bothered, so she went along with it.

And it stayed that way, for a few days.

She'd find dinner, she'd eat alone, and she'd continue on with her night.

She lay in bed that night, staring blankly at the wall before sighing and getting up. Pulling a jacket on over her shirt, she left her room and wandered around the base. Walking out to the garage and up a flight of the metal stairs to reach the access door to the roof.

When she reached the top of the building, she walked across the roof for a moment before settling at a spot that looked near perfect for a seat.

The sky was clear, but these weren't the stars she had grown up looking at.

She sniffled a bit, staring up at the sky feeling the cold prickle her nose.

Tears slipped down her cheek as she sat there, not paying attention to the time passing as she stared up at the sky.

Catching the sound of the door quietly opening and shutting her eyes snapped out over to see Ghost's large figure walking across the rooftop in the darkness. He stopped, eyes settling on her for a moment. He looked back at the door, almost contemplating on if he should leave or not.

However, he didn't decide to leave, rather walking forward and leaning up against the wall next to her.

"You're in my spot." He says, pulling out a cigarette and lighting it.

He wasn't wearing the skull mask, however. It was a simple black mask. The bridge of his nose was exposed, eyes showing through more. He lacked the black paint smudged around his eyes emphasizing the void his graze would drag you into.

It was Jitter's turn to give silence as a response.

"Why aren't you home?" Jitters asks, exhaling and watching her breath appear as steam and dissipate into the sky.

"I assume the same reason you aren't there either." He responds, taking a long drag on his cigarette.

They come to a silent agreement. It was as if they had seen eye to eye on something, they had a bit more in common than they'd like to agree.

This place was their home, like it or not.

"You're missing your face." Jitters says, shooting him a glance.

"Thought I was having a smoke, the kind where I'm alone." He replies. There was no dig in his response, just as if it was an explanation.

They sit together, a while longer looking up at the sky.

"You ever think about gettin' old?" She looks at him, watching as he takes a drag on his cig, exhaling it out into the cold night air.

"Sometimes." He adds after a moment.

She pulls her knees to her chest, resting her chin on the tops of her knees.

"It's weird to think about." She mumbles.

He doesn't respond.

"This place feels like my coffin, in a way." She glances up at him, meeting his gaze. "That I'll never get the opportunity to be anything else than just, Jitters."

"Hm."

"It's just, rather lonely I suppose."

She couldn't help but feel the searing feeling on the side of her head from his eyes.

"Do you ever get scared, you know, of dying?" She asked.

"No." He responds, flicking his cigarette down onto the metal roof.

"Only the good die young." He adds.

"That's not comforting." She sighs. "I want to be good."

"Who are you to judge the difference between good and evil?" He asks her.

She didn't know what to expect from the conversation.

But not that.

Who are you to judge the difference between good and evil?

"Do you ever miss it?" She asks.

He looks at her and nods a bit before flicking the ash off of the end of his cigarette.

"Sometimes." He finally responds.

"Would you ever go back to it?"

"There's nothing left to go back to." He says.

Home.

"I guess that's something we have in common." She mumbles.

#Jitters Au #john soap mactavish #john price #soap x reader #cod mwii #Simon Riley #simon ghost riley #gaz garrick x reader #gaz garrick

[thewolvesof1998]

20 questions for fic writers!

Tagged by the talented @jesuisici33 @hoodie-buck @wikiangela @spotsandsocks

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

9

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

38,361

3. What fandoms do you write for?

9-1-1/Buddie

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I want you to be selfish with me (4.6k M)

Tapping Morse Code into your heart (2.8k E)

You bring me comfort (4.2k T)

You with the dark curls, you with the watercolour eyes (1.6k M)

I Can See You (3k T)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yeah, I love getting comments, it literally makes my day so I always take the time to respond. Though I sometimes struggle with what to say so I might respond slowly but that's because I overthink everything 😂

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh, it's either I ain't proud of all the punches that I've thrown (826 T) in which Eddie's in Jail and he almost calls Buck (Coda for episode s03e05 Rage) OR Under the Guise of Violence (3k E) Eddie can't touch Buck unless it's to hurt him, after a sparring match Buck confronts him and it leads them back to Eddie's bedroom- I had a lot of people comment about the angsty ending 😂

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'm kinda a sucker for happy endings, this might be cheating as it's not finished yet but when it is Alright, Cowboy, Go Get 'Em (17k E) is probably going to have the happiest ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've had someone comment some criticism which I didn't think much of at the time because what they pointed out was something I was unhappy with myself and it did actually help me fix it but I realise now after talking to my friend who got me in to fic writing that that wasn't cool since I hadn't actually asked for any feedback.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Oh yeah, mostly just smut with a few kinks thrown in, playing around with light sub/dom stuff. I definitely want to write some more hardcore stuff in the future.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I haven't, I'm not opposed, since I only write Buddie atm it probably would be a Lonestar cross over, maybe Tarlos? But I have so many WIPs that it will be very far in the future.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, that would be pretty dope!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, I would love to try one day.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Buddie's pretty much up there, but I do love Steddie and Anidala

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

God, none of them I hope but the one that's the furthest from being done is probably either my MMA Rivals AU or Mafia Husbands AU.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Ahhhh maybe dialogue and plot.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Uh, finishing? It's probably the biggest one atm, I just keep losing the mojo and struggling to stay focused until the end.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I love to but I have to make sure I'm using it right and appropriately.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Technically Sharkboy and Lava Girl when I was 8. 1D was the first I ever posted tho.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Probably one I haven't finished or posted yet called You make bad days infinitely better I'm really trying to make the writing pretty, you know? And I love it and I will finish it at some point.

Tagging: @wildlife4life​ @eddiebabygirldiaz @disasterbuckdiaz @try-set-me-on-fire @bekkachaos @buddierights @forthewolves @911-on-abc @hippolotamus @shitouttabuck @911onabc @exhuastedpigeon @eddiediaztho @your-catfish-friend @loserdiaz @ladydorian05 @watchyourbuck @king-buckley @chaoticgremlinwholikescheese @daffi-990 @fortheloveofbuddie @steadfastsaturnsrings @mangacat201 @theotherbuckley  @eowon @rainbow-nerdss @nmcggg @pirrusstuff @evanbegins @giddyupbuck @sammy-souffle

#9-1-1 #buddie #thewolvesof1998 writes #buddie fic #tag games #ao3

[beanghostprincess]

Transfem Buggy and Luffy calling her auntie anon again bc I have brainrot-

Luffy just rolls with the punches of "No I won't tell Shanks WHY would I tell Shanks that sorry asshole can learn about it with the new wanted poster-"

Auntie doesn't want to tell Uncle? Fair enough. Totally fine. Not his circus, not his monkeys (haha puns). You know what IS his business tho? Expediting That Bounty Poster Update. "Hey, wanna fix the picture like right now??"

"What?"

"I crave violence and tomfoolery."

"Hmm..."

"I'll punch, you set fires!!"

"Deal! :oD"

Buggy and Luffy have been left unattended for all of three minutes. By the time both groups realize they're gone, it's Too Late. Off in the distance, there's smoke, distant cackling, and a sudden BOOM.

At least her wanted poster is updated within like 3 days!!

((Adding a personal hc of mine, bc Luffy has so many issues with abandonment and family, Robin and he both sit down and make scrapbooks together. It's both smth creative, hands-on, and can be useful for thought exercises. Luffy has a scrapbook that he devoted to all the people he loves/loved, who loved him in turn. It's a bit messy, but each person has their own section. It's his personal record of his found family, a reminder of love and that he has things worth fighting for.

After that fiasco, he starts a new section just for Buggy.))

MEANWHILE

Shanks is hungover, exhausted, and has just taken a sip of his spiked coffee while he goes to check the newspaper.

He does a spit take.

He screams.

Buggy D. Clown, the wanted poster says, beneath a photograph of a woman giving a sharp, manic grin, holding a bomb in one hand and flipping off the photographer with the other. You can barely see Luffy in the background, doing.... something. Shanks only has eyes for her. He is Staring. He is SWOONING. He is...

He checks the log pose.

He is going to pay her a visit.

This is,, So cute,,, They be blowing shit up so Buggy updates her wanted poster. So sweet. Bonding moment, honestly. The connection and bond between Buggy and Luffy sometimes just,,,, My beloveds. I love them so much. And Shanks visiting Buggy after finding out??????? He would SO do that but do you wanna kill me??????????

#i just love the whole concept of shanks paying buggy a visit and mihawk and crocodile going full protective mood #one of my favorite things #also luffy and buggy they're just so sweet wefjkwekfb #one piece #buggy the clown #monkey d. luffy #red haired shanks

[treasuringizu]

For the 100 followers celebration can I please request deku friends to lovers where he has been in love with the reader for forever and they are completely oblivious to it! I love that trope it’s so cute

anon i am sorry that this is months late!!!!! forgive me!!!!!!

you and izuku have been friends since you started working at his agency.

izuku has also been completely and utterly enamored with you since you started working at his agency.

it started off really small, he swears. just a little interest in you, the new tech assistant. he's one of the people you had to sit down with an interview with in order to get the job, and he already knew that you were right for it as soon as you started talking about how much you loved what you do.

he helped you settle in, bringing coffee to your desk every time he knew he was going to be around your assigned area. he showed you around, explaining to you the main parts of his agency and how everything works in the building; he made sure that you felt welcome.

and how could you not, with that charming smile and dimples that he flashes every time he sees you, the cute bashfulness that never fails to warm your chest, and the endless kindness that he shows to absolutely everyone.

and then from meaningless coffees every once in a while, he starts going out of his way to see you. drops by whenever he has a break, just to say hi and then end up in an engaged conversation with you that causes him to lose track of time, his assistant tracking him down and chiding him for being late to his patrol shift.

when he finds out that you sometimes forget to eat lunch he brings you one on your breaks, or even invites you out to eat with him, a bashful smile on his face and the apples of his cheek a soft red that makes it really hard for you to say no to his offer.

he's just so sweet. it kills you. you know that whatever it is the both of you have going on could never progress to anything farther, and you don't know if you want to punch him in the face for making you feel this way, or kiss him stupid because you just can't help yourself.

and izuku, oh izuku is in so much trouble.

its like every single thing you do sets him on fire. the way you smile when you notice him approaching you, the sight enough to leave him tripping over his feet. the way you laugh when he gets some food on his face because he's always been a little bit of a messy eater, and then how you use your thumb to wipe it off his face and he can feel his heart stuttering in his chest.

and trust him, he's tried, many, many times, to tell you how he feels. but then you look at him with your eyes that he swears he could get lost in, and the words disappear in his throat.

when he does manage to ask you out on dates, you don't even think anything of them, just assuming its a regular outing between two friends. It kills him a little inside every time you refer to him as just you friend. Wishes that you would see it as more. Hopes that he can one day get you to change your mind if he doesn't chicken out again.

But for now, you and Izuku are just friends.

#idk why this has no dialog #why #so sorry anon!!! #mwah!!! #i didnt even get to the lovers part #😭 #didnt read over either #ignore all mistakes!!!! #izuku x reader #deku x reader #.kc writes #.izuku drabble #mha x reader #izuku drabble

[joons]

Top 5 villains in the real life story of Elvis's life/legacy?

Tom Parker / Andreas van Kuijk

Everyone else pales in comparison. It's hard to convey the extent of his cruelty and control. He stymied Elvis professionally, creatively, and personally, sabotaging his opportunities, relationships, and interests. He knew how to make Elvis doubt himself, and absolutely everything that went wrong in Elvis' life can be traced back to Parker and the very deliberate way he isolated and undermined Elvis. There are no words. Bottomless hatred. Every day a new revelation.

Hal Wallis

Wallis was the producer of Elvis' films for Paramount. Despite being one of the first people to recognize Elvis' acting talent, Wallis made a choice to keep him in horrible roles because he didn't believe audiences would ever take him seriously. In a public interview, Wallis told the press that Elvis films were terrible but that he had to keep making them because they made enough money to finance artistic films for Paramount. It broke Elvis' heart. Wallis also impressed upon Parker that Elvis gaining any amount of weight was unacceptable, thus leading to Elvis developing an eating disorder where he would starve himself for weeks at a time.

Steve Dunleavy and the Bodyguard Book

In the last year of Elvis' life, his dad fired three of his close bodyguards/members of the Memphis Mafia: Dave Hebler, Sonny West, and Red West. Feeling hurt and disrespected, the three agreed to do interviews for a tell-all book by Steve Dunleavy. The three of them would later claim they only went to the press to douse Elvis with cold water about how bad they thought his drug habits had gotten, but even if that was the case, they had no business agreeing to work with someone like Dunleavy. Dunleavy was a favored reporter of Rupert Murdoch, who, I kid you not, hated rock 'n' roll so much that he commissioned a takedown of Elvis while he was still alive. Murdoch believed that taking Elvis down would generate enough discourse to keep some of his struggling papers in business, turning Elvis into a symbol of the lower classes who wasn't worthy of serious consideration as an artist or compassionate understanding as a human being. The bodyguards were paid for their interviews, and Dunleavy proceeded to use their quotes to write what Murdoch wanted: a scandalous, seedy tell-all that turned Elvis into an object of ridicule. Worse, of course, was that Elvis' friends were party to it; it led to so much stress, grief, and anger for Elvis in his final months. He worried constantly about it, afraid of what Lisa and his fans would think of him afterward. Elvis: What Happened? was published two weeks before his death and set the tone for a genre of Elvis muckraking that continues today.

Dee Stanley and Sundry

Dee was Elvis' stepmother, who married his father Vernon shortly after the death of Elvis' beloved mother, Gladys. There was always going to be friction between the two just based on the speed of the remarriage, but it didn't help that Dee had originally tried to seduce Elvis (nothing doing) before turning her attentions on his dad. Elvis never liked Dee, and the feeling became mutual. After his death, Dee published a memoir that was a near-complete fabrication, writing anything that she thought would disgrace Elvis. The worst claim she made was that Elvis and Gladys were incestuous. Several of Elvis' friends nearly punched her when they appeared in a room together for a television interview. Her sons were heavily influenced by Dee's perspective and have kept up the same escalating, baffling claims to make money.

Alanna Nash

Unfortunately a widely cited and respected Elvis researcher, Nash has such a willingness to entertain "new" stories about Elvis that she falls for hoaxes and lies on a regular basis. Sometimes she escapes criticism by presenting her books as "oral histories," essentially raw interviews with people who knew him, which at least mostly allows the reader to decide the veracity of each account for themselves. But she bolsters her other books with sketchy psychoanalysis and innuendo intended to smear her subjects, or at least generate some rumors that will grab headlines. For instance, she claimed to have unearthed a theory that Col. Parker left Holland because he committed a murder there. Sounds exciting and even plausible given his reputation, but digging into it, the evidence is so slim and sketchy that it could really only be published by someone like Nash, and only after his death. Another example is how credulously she treats Byron Raphael, a serial liar who claims Marilyn Monroe and Elvis Presley (who spoke for a total of three minutes in their lifetimes) had sex (which Byron got to witness, of course!) and that Natalie Wood had sex with Byron in the next room after Elvis couldn't "do" it for her. When a longtime Elvis researcher questioned the article Alanna wrote with Raphael for Playboy, she said, "If Bill Burk was critical of [Raphael's] integrity, I'd say that's because Bill was jealous he didn't find Byron first." Uh-huh.

About gossip involving Parker's possible murder, she said, "I want to be clear in saying that there is no hard proof that he committed this murder, [but] in my heart of hearts, I believe he did." In another interview, when questioned, she snapped that anyone who says she "accused him of murder can't read."

The biographer Albert Goldman is a lot worse than her, like, on every level, a truly vile, insane person who wrote screeds (they are not biographies, they are a cry for help) against both Elvis and John Lennon. But Alanna loves Goldman and cites him a lot, and she irritates me more because she has a better reputation than she deserves, while Goldman is widely considered to be a disgusting hack.

I could probably include a few others, but as much as I might dislike other people in the Elvis story, they get the benefit of the doubt from me because at least they aren't these folks.