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#sometimes my mind spins stories
antianakin · 17 days
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It's really depressing that the only real Jedi centric and Jedi positive show in existence is written for preschoolers, while many of the more "adult" shows are edgy and about morally ambiguous or straight-up evil characters. As if lessons about being kind and selfless are somehow not important or relevant to adults just as much if not more than they are to children.
It feels like characters who are unambiguously good are seen as only enjoyable by the very young and adult viewers will only actually appreciate characters who are cruel and selfish (and the requisite "tragic backstory" that always goes with it to help excuse their cruel and selfish choices).
It's just really sad and disappointing.
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"You survive on crumbs, so a small meal feels like a feast. And a feast becomes a dream."
"I just want to survive."
"Without guilt."
"And yet, you still carry it. Why take so little if the guilt is still there?"
"Because the less I take, the quieter it is."
"One day you won't take anything and it will quiet... But so will you. And more guilt will come, just not from you."
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vvanessaives · 2 years
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obsessed with how good vesper & panam could be together, like in my head i just know they would be perfect for each other. if fenix wasn't a thing. if rogue wasn't a thing. then i just know these two would be THE thing
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The following is mostly conjecture + draws from this post, which is now noncanon.
GOING INSANE OVER WALLY!!! He's so full of love he loves his friends so much which means that he is so WORRIED and TERRIFIED! Like, he is the first and only one so far to realise that their situation is not normal and that it's messed up. Nobody else knows.
And it just kind of happened one day. Something didn't make sense and then as the days went on less things made sense until he realised that something was seriously wrong.
And now it's up to him to find out what's wrong exactly, how much danger they're in, and what form that danger takes, exactly. Nobody else knows, it's just him, and he better find out the rules quick before anybody gets hurt.
Now he's stuck trying to figure out how to save everyone and keep them all safe. He's doing his best but clearly it's hard and long and he keeps hitting roadblocks, like how nobody answers the phone or lets him in.
Well, no actually. He has Home at least, there's that. I don't know what his relationship with Home is, they're obviously entangled with eachother, but I'm unsure if it's healthy. Are they giving a united front? Or are they only hurting eachother. Personally, I think they're in it together, since all of their interactions seem amiable so far.
But like, dude, Wally really seems he gets caught up in the "Oh god. They don't even know." dread spiral a lot. Like, he's grappling with the fact that their reality is wrong and they're all in danger and he's just supposed to? Go back? And hang out with everyone normally?
And yet, he can't tell anyone else about it, because he doesn't know what'll happen. What if they take it badly? What if the world they're trapped in retaliates? There's too many unknowns. He can't risk it.
Wonder if he knows any safe places to freak out about it. Home seems relatively safe, at least. But it's not like he can write this stuff down. What if someone finds it? He might write anyways. I bet he talks to Home a lot about their situation. Try to hash things out, make game plans.
What Wally's realised is obviously a huge weight on him, and it's affecting him day to day. He keeps spacing out when he hangs out with his friends. His usual quietness and non-expressive face are protecting him for now, but how long until someone notices that he's being off. One person is "all it takes".
Barnaby notices something in the last audio. He asks if everything is alright. We're nearing the end of the prologue. One person is all it takes. I worry about how Wally and Home will handle this. Will Wally be able to successfully deflect? Can they keep this going a little longer? Or will Barnaby come away knowing that something is wrong, and that Wally isn't telling him everything.
MAN IDK. As someone who's in a toxic/abusive home with siblings who are (or were, rather) oblivious to anything wrong, I relate to Wally heavily. Oh god, they don't even know. Not wanting to tell anyone because there are too many variables. Constantly worrying about how to make sure everyone stays safe and how to get everyone out of the situation. Spacing out a lot, because it's just too big. Even if you're not actively thinking about it, even if you're doing something fun and enjoying hanging out, for long stretches of time, even, it's something that lingers behind you. The context to everything.
It's just. I relate to him. A lot. And I truly hope he pulls off his plans flawlessly. But we know he won't. Things are going to get worse before they get better, if they get better at all.
I don't think Wally's a villain. I see him and I'm like "Oh, of course, he's just trying his best to get everyone to escape a bad situation".
He loves everyone!! He just wants everyone to be okay!! But it's hard and frustrating to figure out how to do that, and it can feel helpless sometimes. And doing all that while grappling with his very reality being a lie? Tough break!
Whether he makes bad decisions, whether intentionally or accidentally, in the name of this, however? That's a different story.
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saja-star · 2 years
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One of my favorite things about learning about traditional textiles is the little ghosts they left in the language. Of course the ghosts are there, now that I know to look for them. Once upon a time, half the population spent a majority of their day making textiles. Spinning, at the very least, has been a part of humanity since the Neanderthals. That kind of knowledge doesn't just disappear.
A heckle was a device with sharp metal spikes, and people drag flax through the spikes to separate out the fibers from the chaff. When you say someone heckled a performer, you think you are being literal but you're speaking in an ancient metaphor.
When my grandpa says "spinning yarns" to mean telling stories, he knows that one's not quite literal, but its vividness is lost to him. There is no image in his mind of rhythm, muscle memory, and the subtle twist that aligns clouds of fibers into a single, strong cord.
When a fanfic writer describes someone carding their fingers through someone's hair, that's the most discordant in my mind. Carding is rough, and quick, and sometimes messy (my wool is full of debris, even after lots of washing). The teeth of my cards are densely packed and scratchy. But maybe that's my error, not the writer's. Before cards were invented, wool was combed with wide-toothed combs, and sometimes, in point of fact, with fingers. The verb "to card" (from Middle English) may actually be older than the tools I use, archaic as they are. And I say may, because I can't find a definitive history. People forget, even when the language remembers.
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reiding-writing · 8 days
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hi red !! i'm sending through a rec for your climacteric event hehehehe <3
spencer reid x fem!reader with the colour prompts red 1 ("You're bleeding."), green 2 ("You're safe here, I promise."), and purple 1 ("You know you're my best friend, right?") please? LOVE YOU LOADS RAHHHH
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SCARECROWS [CLIMACTERIC]
1. “You’re bleeding.”
2. “You’re safe here, I promise.”
1. “You know that you’re my best friend, right?”
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WARNINGS: reader injury, blood duh, mentions of being stabbed <3
spencer reid x reader || hurt/comfort || 1.6k || event page!!
a/n: you adding the direct quotes made my job so much easier in finding them rip 😭 thanks for the request ml <333
main masterlist!! ⋆。°✩ event masterlist!!
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Sometimes you wondered why you joined the FBI.
If by making one different decision you’d be in a completely different career in a different part of the country with a husband and children living in a two story house with a white picket fence.
Spencer would probably fill you in on the butterfly effect, how a single flap of a butterfly’s wings could change the trajectory of the wind and spin into a tornado, or in your case, leave you stranded and unarmed in an overgrown cornfield with your only company being the crows flying overhead.
It was arguably, definitely, your fault, but what were you supposed to do when the unsub was running off into the night after you’d finally tracked him down.
He’d slipped under the radar for too long, you weren’t going to let it happen again.
Though you weren’t going to lie, you were starting to regret not waiting for the rest of the team.
How were you supposed to know that the welfare check you were sent on would turn into a chase?
They were twelve minutes out last time you checked. You didn’t have signal anymore, who knew how close they were now.
All you knew was that you were a sitting duck with an empty magazine in an unfamiliar location with a light level so low you could barely see your own feet.
You’d lost the unsub a good few minutes ago, and you weren’t about to stand around with nothing to protect yourself with, so you started running back the way you came, hopeful that it would bring you out back at the farmhouse, with floodlights and a phone signal.
You weren’t that lucky.
You never were.
“Oh my god—“ Emily sounds like she’s seen a ghost as she cups her left hand over her mouth, her right lowering to her side until her gun is limply resting in her fingers.
Her face is a mix of relief, astonishment and absolute horror, and as the team follow her gaze they mirror one by one until the whole group is frozen in abject shock.
You were alive, thank god, but you were also stumbling backwards out of the corn field like a final girl in a horror movie, completely disheveled and torn up with your attention completely focused on the rows of stalks in front of you like you were afraid something was going to pop out and finish you off.
The sight was enough for Spencer to feel like he was going to throw up his stomach, although whether out of relief or anxiety he wasn’t exactly sure.
Either way he was pocketing his gun and practically sprinting in your direction the second he got a full view of you, no care for what you were running from in his mind whatsoever.
At least you were okay.
“Hey-” His hand barely grazes over your shoulder before your instincts kick in and you swing your elbow outwards with the intent of sending it straight into his face.
It hits him directly underneath his nose, sending his neck back sharply to stop any worse injury occurring under the force of your arm.
It doesn’t deter him though, and he doesn’t so much as even cover his nose from the pain as he takes your arms in his hands to swivel you in his direction so that you can see that you aren’t in danger.
“Hey- Hey, it’s just me you’re okay, you’re safe here I promise,”
The flicker of absolute terror in your eyes makes him swear his heart is going to shatter, and even as he watches it fizzle out under the realisation that he wasn’t someone to be afraid of that small pit in his stomach didn’t disappear.
You looked bad.
Your hands were grazed and raw, you were covered in mud, half of your shirt had been ripped from the hem and tied around your left thigh — presumably as some sort of makeshift bandage, and you were so much paler than you usually were, all of the colour completely drained from your face until you looked almost translucent under the mix of moonlight and blared foglights.
“You’re bleeding— Did I do that? I’m sorry—” You reach up your hand towards and he swerves to take it in his own with a shake of his head, clasping his fingers gently around your shaking palms, careful not to irritate the angry red covering them.
“Don’t worry about me, are you okay? What happened?” His eyes roam anxiously over your frame, lingering specifically on the torn piece of fabric around your thigh that is slowly but surely turning from a charcoal grey to a dark maroon the longer you stand talking.
“I- He ran and- and I followed him and then I lost him and- I don’t- He doubled back on me and I didn’t-” Half of the words coming out of your mouth were almost completely incoherent, and he could see your pupils refusing to dilate even under the direct beam of one of the SUVs’ headlights.
“Okay okay, calm down, take a breath for a second,” Spencer gives your arms a small squeeze to cut off your attempt at an explanation, glancing over your shoulder where the team is still grouped together, with Morgan and Hotch on the phone — presumably for an ambulance and some backup respectively— and the others watching you cautiously, unsure whether they should join in on Spencer’s examination of your health.
“How did you hurt your leg?” You follow Spencer’s gaze downwards towards your thigh, and it’s like the second your eyes recognise what it is you completely loose control of all of your motor functions from waist down.
“Woah—” Spencer takes the sudden change in your weight distribution in his stride, or at least he tries to, shifting his arms underneath your armpits to stop you from hitting the ground underneath you and supporting your weight with his own as he stumbles a few steps backwards. “Guys—”
Emily is at your side immediately, alleviating some of your weight onto herself so the two of them can hold you upright.
“He had a weapon…” You wince under the searing pain in your leg, the adrenaline wearing off fast and hard now that your body knows it’s no longer in danger.
“What kind of weapon?” The concern seeps from Spencer’s voice to soak into your skin, leaving your heart to accelerate under the knowledge that you were injured bad.
“A uh… fork, like a gardening fork… He stabbed me with it…” Although more coherent now, your voice was slowly fading into small mutters and whispers, like the exhaustion in your body was catching up to your mind and making even your tongue too languished to move. “I’m really tired…”
“Hey no- not yet-” Emily shakes her head with a conviction. “There’s an ambulance on the way, you have to stay awake until then,”
“But…”
“Emily‘s right, stay awake you’ll be fine,” Spencer sounds like he’s more trying to convince himself than you as him and Emily support your weight back towards the cluster of SUVs, and the added weight of your head resting against his shoulder doesn’t help his anxiety whatsoever. “Hey, come on…”
He lifts his shoulder slightly to shift your head and you let out a soft noise of discontentment. “I’m awake I’m awake, just conserving my energy…”
“Just keep your eyes open okay?”
You give him a small hum as the two of them sit you down on the hood of one of the cars, and Emily leaves you in Spencer’s care to check with Morgan on the arrival of the ambulance.
“You know that you’re my best friend, right?” You turn your head a little further into Spencer’s shoulder as he becomes the sole pillar of your support, blinking slowly in an attempt to keep your eyes open.
“Don’t say that to me right now,” He shakes his head with furrowed eyebrows, a dark line forming between his eyes as the skin pinches together in his worry.
“But you are though,”
“You can remind me of that after you’re in the hospital,”
“I hate hospitals,” You let out a small, fatigued huff, rolling your eyes at the prospect. “I’m gonna be in there for god knows how long and I just wanna find this guy before he hurts anyone else…”
“Well, he has hurt you, and that’s what’s important right now,” Spencer’s tone contradicts itself between concern and relief. You’re alive, but you’re not in good shape. “We need to make sure that you’re okay before anything else,”
And in an act of holy divination — or just coincidence if Spencer was concerned — right as he mentions making sure that you’re okay the blaring lights of the called ambulance come into view, joined by a shrill, sharp ring that seems to echo over the field.
You all but hobble over to it once it’s parked, successful only in the fact that Spencer is actually supporting more of your weight than you were.
At least he stays by your side the entire time.
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lonelyharmonies · 9 months
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just friends
what happens when you wake up in someone else’s bed after getting drunk in a party?
pairing: jaehyun x fem reader type: fluff, strangers-to-friends-to-lovers au (or kinda), college au, word count: 22k warnings: swearing, slightly suggestive sometimes a/n.: hello friends!! this story here is my baby, the first full fic i've ever written 💚 3 years later i still love it as the first time i've posted it. i hope you enjoy it as much as i do. if you think you have read this story before, youprobably did, this is a repost. not very much edited so you might find some mistakes, i apologize!
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The sunlight peeking through the curtains meets your face and you wake up as soon as your cheeks get warm. You didn’t remember your bed being this comfortable. A foreign smell invades your nostrils but you don’t mind for a moment. The perfume had notes of lavender and it was sort of strong, but you didn’t mind, deciding to put your head further into the pillow, capturing more of that pleasant scent.
A few minutes later, you open your eyes and it takes a while for you to realize it isn’t your bedroom. Neither is your cousin’s. You have no idea where and why you are here. The room is small but cozy, way different from your own. You can see some heavy books on the shelves next to you and a box full of vinyl.
You turn your head to the right to find a naked back facing you. Analyzing the body proportions and the room you were in, you assumed it was a boy. 
What happened to you? Why were you sleeping with a stranger?
You tried to remember the events from last night.
“Come on, Y/N, it’s gonna be fun!” “I don’t like frat parties, Taeyong.” you repeat the same line “Plus, I am really tired. Do you know how many assignments I have due next week? And tutoring is killing. Some students really push my buttons.” “See? You are so stressed! A couple of beers will do you good.”
Then, you remembered the noise. A lot of noise. You see flashes from the previous night events: there were people dancing, Mark Lee spilling his drink on you, and a shirtless Yuta dancing on the top of the kitchen’s counter. The only thing that wasn’t clear on your mind was how you ended up in this room.
Your cousin was in front of you, clearly drunk. You knew he was a lightweight. He knew he was a lightweight. That was probably the reason why Taeyong would always try to find a way to drag you to the parties with him: to clean the mess he makes. “I can’t drive you back, pumpkin. I’m sorry,” He said, bringing his hands to cup his face, as a way to act cute, but spilling his drink on the floor in the process. “Well, I’m already aware of this. You don't even have a license.” You felt your head spinning. Taeyong smiles and focuses on something behind you “I’ll call an Uber. Or maybe I should just walk,” You fished your phone out of your pocket, but your cousin took it away from you. “No, no. Don’t go home now.” He waved at someone while you tried to get your phone back. “You should enjoy this party. How long haven’t you made out with someone?” “LEE TAEYONG!” You and Johnny, who had placed an arm on your shoulders, shouted at the same time. “and The Cousin!”  “Can she sleep here tonight, Johnny? She’ll sleep in my room” Taeyong asked and Johnny screamed “Sure” while you tried to scold the other boy. “Lee Taeyong, come back here. Who said I agreed-” you tried to grab your cousin’s arm but he deflected your touch and went straight to a group of girls.  “Hey, hey, Y/N. “ Johnny called your attention. “Relax.” He handed you a shot glass full of a transparent liquid “The night has just started.”
While you were trying to remember what happened the night before, the man that is lying beside you wakes up. Jaehyun turns around and lays his eyes on your figure. At first, he thought he was still dreaming, but the scream that left your mouth once you met his gaze made Jaehyun realize it wasn’t a dream.
You get so startled that you lean backward as Jaehyun tries to hold your arm to keep you in place.
 “Be careful, you’re gonna hurt-” 
You don’t finish listening to his sentence as your body hits the ground with a loud thud. If you were sleepy before, falling out of the bed made you feel completely awake. You knocked your head on the bedside table and groaned quite loudly.
“Good morning, Y/N.” He says from his bed, looking at your lying figure on the floor.
Now that you could see the stranger’s face, you just wished to go back to sleep. Dying was also a good option. Not even in your wildest dreams, you would imagine waking up next to Jeong Jaehyun after getting dead drunk at one of his fraternity’s parties. 
You met Jaehyun when your cousin dragged you to your first frat party two years ago. You were getting some drinks in the kitchen when you laid your eyes on him playing beer pong with Yuta. You didn’t know a guy could look so attractive just by drinking beer wearing an all-black outfit. Ever since, you admired him from afar, never failing to be awestruck by his nice features. You never got the courage to talk to Jaehyun, but it all changed when your cousin insisted that you should help his friend Johnny.
“He is just trying to learn a new language.”  Taeyong would blatantly answer every time you questioned his friend’s sudden interest in taking Spanish classes. At the time, you were working for the Language Center at your university, so the two boys were constantly pestering you to sign Johnny up for the Spanish course and they only stopped once you gave in. It didn’t take you long to find out the reason why Johnny was so persistent: Mrs. García, or Isabela García, the senior student that taught the course: Spanish for Speakers of Other Languages. She was very sweet, smart, and popular among everyone on Campus and, apparently, Johnny was trying to have his shot with her while getting extra credits.  Eventually, you became closer. Not only because of your shared class but because Taeyong was your mutual friend. It was after one of your classes that you formally met Jaehyun for the first time, six months after seeing him in that party for the first time. He was waiting outside, a tray with coffee in one hand and a paper bag in the other. “I can’t believe you thought it was a good idea to try to make a pickup line in Spanish.” you sighed loudly. “You can barely introduce yourself. Plus, she’s your teacher, keep it in your pants.” “Please, I was amaz- OH, whassup Jeffrey?!” Johnny spotted his friend waiting for him “This is my boring classmate Y/N. Y/N, this is Jaehyun.” “Hi, nice to meet you,” you said sheepishly, avoiding to look at his face. “Nice to meet you too.” “Today I said to Isabella that she was “La chica más Bella I’ve ever seen.” You know, Isabella and all-” “I don’t speak Spanish, Johnny.” the guy mumbled and you suppressed a smile. “- and even though I couldn’t say the whole sentence in Spanish, she smiled at me and said I was sweet. I bet she loved it.” “I clearly remember her disgusted face when she asked you to keep doing the exercise.” “You're lying to make me look bad.” “She wouldn’t need to lie, Hyung,” Jaehyun said, making you giggle.
After that meeting, you did talk to each other, but never alone. It was either at their fraternity parties or at lunch when he would join you, Johnny, and Taeyong. Now, you had slept in his bed and didn’t even remember how you ended up there. 
“I have no idea how I ended up on your bed. I am so, so sorry, Jaehyun.” you clumsily start standing up and finding your way to the door. “I-I swear I would never sleep with you.” 
You realize what you said and widened your eyes regretting your words. The boy, on the other hand, only chuckles and stays laid down on his bed, finding quite amusing your flustered and messy state.
“Ouch, it kinda hurts my pride” 
“I mean- I don’t mean like that. You are very attrac-” you stop yourself and shake your hand in front of your body “What I mean is, of course, I would sleep with- NO!” you stop, taking a deep breath. 
Why couldn’t you come up with a simple sentence? You decide to focus on the Mickey Mouse plushie on the top of his shelf and start again.
“This is so embarrassing! What I’m trying to say is-”
Jaehyun’s laughter stops you. He runs his hands through his fingers as he sits on his bed, with the comforter only covering his bottom parts, torso completely exposed.
“I think you mean that you wouldn’t take advantage of me.” 
“Yes! Yes. That’s exactly what I was trying to say.” you quickly agree, averting your gaze from his figure.
“I also have no idea how you ended up here.” Jaehyun states, grabbing a black t-shirt from the ground “but I’m sure nothing happened because I went to bed early last night. And alone.” he emphasizes the last part “Were you at the party?”
“Yeah,” you answered while looking at your feet and end up taking a glance at your stained shirt. 
The stain on your shirt makes you realize how fucked up you must look. You also smell terrible. Why was this happening to you? There were so many bedrooms in this house, why did you end up precisely in his?
“I had a few drinks last night…”
“A few?” he raises an eyebrow curiously.
“Maybe too many.” you scratch the back of your head and keep looking down.
Then, the awkward silence comes. You, standing there, in the middle of the room, like a statue in the middle of the room and Jaehyun a few steps away from you. It fazed you how he managed to look charming even after just waking up. 
“So, uh… The door…” he says motioning to the door behind you, snapping you back to reality.
“Oh, yes, sure. I’m sorry.” you turn back and open the door. 
Luck being on your side, the first thing you see as you get out of the room is your friend, Johnny, holding a puzzled look on his face.
“Isn’t it Jaehyun’s…”
“Yes.” 
You grumble and turn to your left, heading to the staircase, not giving Johnny enough time to make questions.
"Did you sleep together?” he asks Jaehyun loud enough for you to hear by the end of the hall.
“NO,” both of you say at the same time. 
Actually, you screamed from the top of the staircase and Jaehyun mumbled beside Johnny. “I think she’s not really interested.” he completes with a sarcastic note, chuckling.
“Why was she coming out of your room? How did that happen?” 
“Did you smell her clothes? She was probably dead drunk last night.”
By the time the boys reached the messy living room, you were already opening the front door.
“At least drink a cup of coffee” Johnny offers and you shake your head.
“Tell Taeyong I went back to the dorms,” you say, stepping outside and shutting the door as fast as you could. 
“Let me drive-” Johnny starts but you close the door before he could finish “you.”
The two boys head to the kitchen and start preparing their breakfast. Johnny places a cup of coffee in front of Jaehyun who smiles and silently thanks him. The next one to wake up is Yuta, who walked down the stairs inexplicably happy for someone who should have a hangover.
"Care to explain why this house is so noisy on a Saturday morning?” he calls the room’s attention to himself. “I hear too many voices.”
“There was a misunderstanding,” Jaehyun mumbles.
“What do you mean?” Yuta raised an eyebrow at the younger and Johnny giggled.
“Y/N woke up on Jaehyun’s bed this morning.” 
“What, Taeyong’s cousin?” he turns to Johnny who nods “She slept with you?” Yuta gaps at the younger boy “So she finally admitted she-”
“YUta” Johnny interrupts him “I was joking.”
“She was just really drunk and ended up in my room last night,” the youngest says, munching his cereal “When she got there I was already asleep. I didn’t spend a lot of time at the party last night. I have three projects to hand in this month. They are tiring me out.” 
“So, Y/N really slept with you?” Yuta asked again.
“In my room,“ Jaehyun corrects. “Well, if you excuse me, I’ll go to the gym.” he gives them a small smile and leaves the kitchen.
“Yuta, you almost said Y/N likes Jaehyun!” Johnny whispers-yells at Yuta.
“Well, it’s not like she knows how to hide her crush.”
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“So you’re telling me that you slept with Jeong Jaehyun?” your roommate asks after you finished telling her about the events of the previous night.
You sigh loudly and shove her hands from your hair. “Did you listen to what I said? I slept on his bed because I was drunk and probably thought I was entering Taeyong’s room.”
“Come back here, I didn’t finish drying your hair.” she pulls you back by your shoulders “It would have been nice if you had slept with him. I heard stories about Jaehyun…”
“You should stop gossiping around,” You roll your eyes.
“Don’t pull up this act, I know you love it when I spill all the tea for you,” she pulls your hair with unnecessary strength, making you groan “Some girls say he really knows how to use his tongue, you know…” she says, pointing down at your lower body and you hit her hand.
“I don’t wanna hear it,” you say in disgust. “Plus, I don’t know how so many people know how Jaehyun is in bed. He looks really reserved and quiet.“
“The quiet ones are the worst, my friend.” your roommate says before blowing air on your right ear, making you yank away from her.
It was midday when you decided to open your laptop and get some work done. You have three essays due to Thursday and you haven’t even started. It was now your third year and the pressure on your shoulders was getting heavier each day. You’re a good student, excellent grades, the professors love you, but after spending all those years studying communication, you still don’t know what you want to do with your life.
Taeyong always says that your problem is that you are too afraid to take the first step. Deep down, you know what you want, you’re just too afraid to pursue it.
Not even twenty minutes after starting your assignment, you hear a special ringtone and see your cousin’s face on your phone’s screen.
“I’ll stop calling you pumpkin and I’ll ask Sicheng if you can have his nickname,” Taeyong says as soon as you pick up the call.
“Who is Sicheng?” 
“Winwin” he replied and you hummed acknowledging. He was a Chinese exchange student who lived with your cousin last year.
“And why would I want to be called Winwin?”
“Because a little bird told me you managed to hook up with Jaehyun. That’s not even a regular win, you deserve a fucking Olympic gold medal for finally going for him.”
You sighed loudly and groaned at your cousin’s words. Did you really think they would keep quiet about this morning’s accident? All the gossips of the campus either start or finish in the damn frat house. They love gossiping. 
"I know your little bird is six feet tall and goes by Johnny,” you say in annoyance. “Couldn’t he keep his mouth shut?”
“It’s like I always say, Cousin,” you hear Johnny’s faint voice, apparently he was far from the microphone “Once the tea’s ready, we need to spill it. But in fact, no. It wasn’t me.” 
“First, I’m not your Cousin, Johnny,” you say, clearing your throat. “Second, you should spill your fucking tea correctly then,” you growl at him which makes both men laugh at the other end of the line. “We didn’t sleep together - I mean, we did sleep together but-”
“I KNEW IT! I told you I heard weird noises coming from the kitchen.” 
You hear a high pitched voice coming from your cousin’s side. You will kill Taeyong as soon as you get a chance.
“Taeyong, is this Donghyuck? That demon? How many people are listening to this phone call?” you lower your voice and feel your cheeks getting hot. Either from embarrassment or anger. (It was probably both).
“Only me, Johnny, Hyuck and Mark.” he simply states, making you huff in annoyance. ONLY four people discussing about your life.
 “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME, THEN?” you scream and hear a bang on your wall, warning you about the noise. “Sorry!” you scream again to apologize. “You said Mark is there? Hey, Mark!”
“Hi, Y/N. I’m still very sorry about your shirt. I promise to buy you a new one,” he says closer to the phone.
“It’s okay, sweetie. My roommate knows how to clean the stain.” 
“Why do you call Mark sweetie and call me a demon? Hyuckie is sad,” Donghyuck says, faking a cute voice.
“Cut the crap, demon. You don’t deserve my love and affection.” you say looking back at your open laptop, realizing you won’t be able to focus anymore “By the way, what does the noise have to do with me? It could have been literally anyone.”
“Well, I heard that you guys spent the whole night, you know… Having fun. Even on the kitchen counter,” the youngest says suggestively ,making you gasp.
“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? HEARD FROM WHO? THAT’S A LIE”
“That’s why I called, we needed to confirm the story,” Taeyong says laughing at your reaction.
“STOP LAUGHING! THIS IS NOT FUN” you hear your dorm neighbor punching your wall again and you snap “I’M BEING DEFAMED, ABIGAIL. GIVE ME A BREAK.” you scream towards the wall she has just punched.
“Abigail should just buy earplugs. She gets irritated by any sound you make.” you hear your cousin mumbling.
“Don’t try to change the subject, Taeyong.” you warn him “I am seriously so mad at you. Especially you, Johnny. I’m sure Jaehyun explained the whole incident.”
“She’s really mad, isn’t she?” someone whispers and the rest of them giggle.
“I can hear you.”
“Yeah, Jaehyun told me you were drunk and ended up in his bed, but who knows what happened before the sun came out.” Johnny giggles.
“NOTHING happened, for your information. I didn’t have sex on the kitchen counter” and you make sure to quickly answer “OR on Jaehyun’s bed. I didn’t hook up with that man, please, stop getting on my nerves.”
“Sicheng can keep being Winwin, she’s still a loser.” you hear Donghyuck snickering at his joke.
“But why did you go to Jaehyun’s room, though?” Mark asks.
“My drunk-self probably thought it was Taeyong’s,” you answer and throw yourself on your bed.
The line stayed silent for some seconds, the boys were whispering something to themselves but you couldn’t understand anything they were saying.
“Hello?”
“So, dear cousin.” he has just started and you could already assume he was trying to hold back his laughter.
“Do you know your cousin’s bedroom is the first room on the right?” Johnny asks and you hum in response.
“Jaehyun hyung stays at the end of the hall, dude..." Mark continues.
“On the left,” Donghyuck adds.
“Are you insinuating I went there on purpose?” you ask them “I was drunk!”
“You know what they say, noona,” you hear Donghyuck’s “drunk actions are sober thoughts.”
“That’s not how it goes,” you mumble.
“We all know you like Jaehyun hyung.” you gasp at the youngest words. “It’s not like you make an effort to hide your crush on him. Even Yuta hyung knows it.”
“I promise I didn’t say anything to them,” Johnny says immediately
“Me neither.” Taeyong adds “But Hyuck made a good point, you’re not subtle.”
“Do you remember last Tuesday how she choked on her own saliva when Jaehyun offered her sour gummies?” Johnny added laughing.
“Stop mocking me.” you huffed. “Please, don’t make a big deal out of this. The situation itself is already embarrassing.”
“You should shoot your shot, Y/N.” Mark says in a supportive tone “If I hadn’t made the first move, I wouldn’t be dating now.”
“Yes, we support you.”
“If even Mark has a girlfriend, you can get that d- OUCH DON’T HIT ME”
“Plus, you already know each-”
“You’re not that bad-looking either-”
All the boys start speaking at the same time and you think you might go crazy. What are they talking about? Dating Jeong Jaehyun? It’s not like you were in love with the guy, it was only a crush, for heaven’s sake! You were only acquaintances and dating was definitely not your top priority right now. You hang up on the rambling boys at the same time your roommate comes back to your shared room.
“What happened? Abigail was complaining about you screaming at her,” she says closing the door and sitting beside you.
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When Monday came, you instantly wished that it was Friday. You are woken up by a pillow being thrown at you, full force. The alarm on your phone must have been ringing for a while but you didn’t hear it.
“Good morning to you too, Jiwoo.” you groan.
“Turn this off,” she says covering her head with her comforter looking like a caterpillar. “What time are you free today? Wanna grab dinner?”
“Spanish class finishes at 7.” you yawn and stand up, finally getting enough strength to start your day.
You’ve been taking Spanish classes for a year and a half now. And even though Mrs. García graduated last semester, Johnny continued taking the classes, which positively surprised you.
“I’ll meet you at the Language Center, then.” she pokes her head out of her comfortable cocoon to whisper “You can invite that hot classmate of yours. The tall one.”
“I’m not gonna invite Johnny,” you say shaking your head and choosing your pair of jeans and t-shirt of the day “He will certainly embarrass me.”
“We’ve been living together for three years, is there anything about you I don’t know yet?” she says, now sitting on her bed. “Stop being selfish and help your lonely friend here.”
“Why Johnny, though?” you ask, turning your head to her “Remember how he signed up for the Spanish classes only because of the hot teacher?”
“Yeah, he’s a frat boy.” she says shrugging her shoulders “But it’s not like I want to marry him. It’s like Cyndi Lauper used to say...” she stands up and takes her phone out of the charger and ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ starts playing. You roll your eyes and smile at her.
“Alright, I’ll ask Johnny.” you close your drawer and open the bedroom’s door “Just turn it off before Abigail starts hitting our wall.”
Your morning classes went smoothly, no surprises. Some professors scheduled exams for next month and you made sure to add a reminder on your phone. At noon you went to the cafeteria to buy your lunch and ran to Mrs. Park’s office. She was one of the professors responsible for the Academic Writing course, and because of your excellent grades, she recommended you as a tutor. Despite being an elective subject, a lot of freshmen always signed up for it since it was very helpful during your undergraduate life.
Once you get into the long hall, you swallow the last piece of your sandwich and knock on her door. The old lady opened it with a smile, motioning for you to enter.
“How are you today, dear?” she says sitting on her chair and you mirror her action.
“I’m fine, thank you. Is everything alright, Mrs. Park? You called me here…” you say cautiously earning a giggle from the lady.
“Oh, don’t worry dear. I’m sorry if my email sounded so urgent, I just wanted to talk to you about your tutoring classes.” she types something on her laptop and looks back at you. “There are some foreign students in my class who might need help not only with the academic style but the language itself. I will ask you to be patient and take a closer look at them.”
“Of course! I haven’t tutored any foreign student yet, but I’ll gladly help them,” you say smiling.
“I’ll keep you updated with my lesson plans and their assignments…”
Your meeting with Mrs. Park was short and very pleasant, as always. She was kind enough to give you a cookie once you finished. You were now heading back to the main building, finding your way to the library where you would continue the assignments you postponed on Saturday. Too focused on arriving as soon as possible, you didn’t see a tall guy, holding three heavy books, coming in your direction and when you realized, it was too late to get out of his way. You met the floor, just like the books and some of his notes.
“I’m so sorry.” you start picking up the sheets of paper next to you “I didn’t see…” you only meet his eyes when the guy kneels and picks up one of the books on the floor.
“Hi, Y/N” Jaehyun’s lips stretched into a subtle smile, showing the dimples on his cheeks.
“Oh, hi! I’m so sorry for this mess.” you say, both standing up. “I didn’t see you there.”
“You’ve been apologizing a lot lately,” he comments, remembering your flustered state two days before.
“Sor-” you stop yourself before you could finish your apologies, again. Jaehyun giggles at you.
“You’re distracted, it happens.” he shrugs, smiling widely and you swore your heart was going to combust at that very moment. “Gotta go, see you around.”
You don’t even have time to answer, the boy was already at the end of the hall.  
Some hours later and with an empty stomach, you finish your first essay and check the time. You had five minutes to get to class. Hurriedly, you gathered your belongings and ran across buildings to get there on time. Fortunately, the teacher wasn’t in class yet. But Johnny was.
“Señorita, muy tarde, ¿no?” he says and you roll your eyes “Our Spanish princess is late, I can’t believe it.”
“Stop being so annoying.” you say throwing your bag beside him, “I thought I was the Spanish queen. Did you declass me?”
“Now that that straight A student is gone, I gave it a second thought and I believe the queen title belongs to her,. But you're the second best," he says taking a pen and a notebook out of his backpack, making you raise an eyebrow. “I promised I wouldn’t copy your notes this semester.”
“I have to say I’m surprised. I didn’t think you would want to keep studying Spanish.“
"Why not?”
“I thought you only wanted to… you know… hang out with our teacher.” you hesitate.
“Since when is fuck a forbidden word?” he chuckles “Yes, I wanted to fuck her but I told you, I wanted to learn a new language too.”
“You didn’t need to be rude, Johnny,” you mumble and he laughs.
“Plus, I’m doing this for you too.” you give him a questioning look and he replies with a cheeky grin “So you can see Jaehyun’s face twice a week.”
“And here I was considering hooking you up with my roommate,” you say to him.
“What do you mean?”
“She invited you to have dinner with us tonight because she wants to flirt with you.” you say bored, looking at your wristwatch. “Isn’t the teacher a bit late?”
“Well, I’m free tonight, why don’t give your sweet roommate a chance?”
“Just, please, tone it down while I’m eating. I don’t want to be the third-wheel.”
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You had a knife and you weren’t afraid to use it against Johnny right now. When he said he would make sure that you wouldn't be thirdwheeling, he didn’t mention it involved inviting Jeong Jaehyun.
“Is it a double date?” Jiwoon whispered in your ear when she saw the boy approaching your table.
“This is not a date,” you say behind your gritted teeth. “Johnny…” you look at the man in front of you and he smiles widely.
“So, Jiwoo, that’s my friend Jaehyun. We live together.” Johnny introduces Jaehyun to your roommate, who shakes his hand. “This is Jiwoo.”
“Nice to meet you, Jaehyun.”
“I called you here because I thought it would be nice to have a double date!” Johnny boldly says making your eyes grow wider and your face burn. It made Jaehyun’s ear red, but that you didn’t notice.
“This is a friendly dinner,” you say, taking the knife from the table, “and I would appreciate it if you stop being so inconvenient.”
“I thought I could call it a date after what happened Saturday morning.” Johnny grins at you and before you could scream at him, Jaehyun speaks first.
“Stop bringing that up,” he places a hand on Johnny’s shoulder, “you’re making her uncomfortable.”
“Why are your ears so red, Jaehyunnie?” Johnny tilts his head to the side and places both hands on the other boy’s ears.
“I’ll punch your face once we get home,” the younger mumbles and Johnny lifts an eyebrow.
“It will be fun watching you try,” he mumbles back. “So, ladies, shall we order?”
After the dramatic introductions, the dinner went quite well and there wasn’t another mention regarding The Incident (how you like to call it on your mind). Johnny and Jiwoo were too engrossed in their own flirting to think about embarrassing their friends. It was a really pleasant meal and by the end of it, you found out Jaehyun is easygoing and it wasn’t hard to hold a conversation once he opened up. He told you about his major, architecture, even though you already knew that, and said he was glad that Johnny invited him to dinner because, being full of projects to finish, he probably wouldn’t even remember to eat properly.
“We know each other for what, a year and a half?” he asks and you nod. “How come we never talked like this?”
“I think we never had the chance,” you say smiling.
Johnny and your roommate were walking behind you. You glanced back and saw his arms around her shoulders, giggling while she blushed.
“They are disgusting,” you say with disdain, and Jaehyun laughs. “Seriously. I asked him to tone it down… I’m tired of thirdwheeling,” you say under your breath, but Jaehyun hears you.
“Is that why Johnny called me?” he says suggestively “So you did want it to be a double date.”
“What? NO!” you say hitting his left arm but regretting right after. You just got to know the guy, you are not that close yet. But your heart feels lighter once he chuckles.
“Do you know why Johnny always messes with you?” he asks and you shake your head. “Because you get riled up easily. I was only joking, dummy.” he flicks your forehead lightly, smiling at you, exposing his dimples.
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“So, you and Jaehyun talked a lot, huh,” Jiwoo says while both of you are on your way back to the dorms. It was late, but you didn’t mind missing a few hours of sleep. Not today.
“Yeah, he was friendly,” you refrain yourself from saying much more. “I had no one else to talk to since you and Johnny were almost making out in front of me,” you say with a playful smile while she pushes out of the sidewalk.
“You are exaggerating.” she sighs and you smile wider “But we did flirt.”
“Did you give him your number?” you ask, linking your arms together.
“Yes, we exchanged numbers. I hope he texts first.”
“Oh, don’t wait for Johnny.” you say and Jiwoo tilts her head in confusion “He will forget to text you. Once we get home, send him something like ‘thanks for dinner’ or ‘I had so much fun tonight’ and he will be happy.”
The rest of the walk back home was your friend trying to embarrass you bringing up Jaehyun and you trying not to get riled up easily, as the boy had mentioned before. You realized your attempts to remain unbothered were in vain when Jiwoo was running away from you to avoid physical retaliation.
Both of you entered the building laughing as quietly as you could. Once you got to your floor, you headed to the end of the hall, meeting one of your neighbors, Abigail, getting out of her own room with a plate full of cookies.
“Hello, girls! I made those cookies for my roommate, but she’s already asleep. Do you want to share it?”
“Are you sure you don’t wanna keep them for when she wakes up?” Jiwoo asks, already putting a cookie on her mouth “I take it back. Yes, we accept the cookies.”
“Is it good?” she asks expectantly.
“This is DIVINE!” you hit your roommate’s shoulder and open your door.
After accpeting you neighbor's cookies and chatting for a bit, you and Jiwoo went to bed. You laid your head down on your pillow and, even though you felt tired, you couldn’t get out of your head images of a certain dimpled boy. Before The Incident, you and Jaehyun barely had opportunities to know each other like you did tonight. Of course, you would rather cut off your tongue than tell Johnny you liked his idea of inviting the boy. It made you wonder if getting to know him better will make your little crush fade away or make it bigger. You sincerely hoped for the former.
In the morning, rather than your alarm, your cousin’s ringtone woke you up. You groaned and picked up the phone.
“Good morning, pumpkin! Is the grass greener, the world beautiful and life worth living yet?” you hear his giggles and sigh loudly.
Johnny Fucking Seo.
“You are alive to bother me, life still sucks.” you whisper trying not to wake up Jiwoo “Do you know you woke me up before my alarm? What time…” you take your phone from your ears to check the time and when you read 6:17 am on the screen, you know Taeyong days are numbered. “Are you a psychopath? I still had almost an hour of sleep.”
“I just wanted to make sure you wouldn’t be late!” he says loudly and you hear a thud in the background “And also because I wanna meet my lovely cousin before my first class that starts at 8:30. I’m making a special breakfast for us.”
“Please, don’t.” you have flashbacks from the last time Taeyong made a ‘special breakfast’ you had to spend the rest of your day taking antacid “Just stick with simple breakfast. Simple is good.”
“Okay, then. Meet you at 7:30 in the cafeteria.” he says and when you are about to hang up, he finishes with “I might invite Jaehyun too.”
“LEE TAEYONG” you whisper-yell but he had hung up before you could protest. The person who said that family is everything clearly didn’t have an annoying cousin like Taeyong.
You spend some time scrolling through your social media and messaging death threats to Johnny and Taeyong. Then you decide to get up and write a note to your friend. Today both of your classes wouldn’t start until 10 am, so you decided to warn her and let her sleep peacefully.
At 7:35 you arrived at the cafeteria and spotted Taeyong sitting in one of the tables, two trays in front of him.
“You are late.”
“Only five minutes.” you shrug “I thought you were making me a special breakfast,” you go to his side and greet him with a hug.
“You said I should make it simple so I bought you the cafeteria breakfast. Don’t complain.” he takes his bag off the chair next to him and motions for you to sit down. “I need your help.”
You frown while munching a piece of bread. “Help? I thought you called to make fun of me for going on a date with Jaehyun.”
“And yet, you came, willingly. I’ll tell Johnny you considered it a date.” he had a knowing smile adorning his face. “But, no, I wouldn’t wake up earlier just to annoy you. You’re not that important.” he says while peeling a banana. “First, don’t forget that my sister is coming to visit us this weekend. My mom will kill me if you’re not there to celebrate with us.”
Taeyong’s family lived closer than yours. Being only a one hour drive to his hometown, both of you constantly pay your aunt a visit - most of the time requested by her. This time, Taeyong’s sister is visiting after a whole year living abroad with her son and husband, so, obviously, there would be a huge family gathering.
"But I also need your help with a surprise party. Yuta’s birthday is coming soon and I would ask for the boys’ help, but now that Doyoung is gone I can only trust Taeil.”
“That’s because your friends can’t keep their mouth shut,” you mumble and see your cousin smiling. “What do you want me to do? I don’t know Yuta that well, he will find it weird…”
“You won’t need to talk to him or anything. I was thinking you could buy decorations and make the cake.”
“Where will you celebrate it? You can go bowling, maybe going to an arcade… Arcade sounds nice.”
“Arcade? How old are you 12?” Taeyong scoffs. “We’ll just throw a party and invite everyone.”
“You will throw a frat party and give a cake to the guy and call it a surprise?” you deadpan. “Are you dumb?”
“Yeah, I’m throwing him a party. What else do you want me to do?” he looks at you bewildered.
“Well, if your plan is throwing a party and inviting everyone on campus, you won’t need to worry about your friends because Yuta will know one way or another.“ you sigh and place your sandwich back on the tray. “It will be a party full of people who barely know him… it’s better if you just take him to a place he likes. Maybe an amusement park? You can try to find a ticket for that french film festival, he looks cultured, he might like it.”
“People don’t want to spend their birthday at cultured festivals, Y/N. People wanna get drunk. I’m people. Yuta is people.” Taeyong says stealing your sandwich.
“Give it back, thief.” you take it from his hands “I’m not saying he can’t get drunk, I’m just saying it’s stupid to make a frat party to celebrate his birthday, there’s nothing special in it.”
You continue bickering for a couple of minutes until a tall figure appears patting Taeyong shoulder and sitting next to you.
“Good morning to you”
You hear his baritone voice and your heart starts beating faster, but you say to yourself that it had nothing to do with Jaehyun being right beside you. Your pulse was fast because of your argument with Taeyong, yes, that was the reason.
"What are you fighting about?”
“Before you murder me, I didn’t know he would be here.” Taeyong whispers to you. “I didn’t know you had classes early today, Jae.”
“Yeah, I actually came early because of my group project. One of the girls ruined it and now we need to fix it.” he scratches the back of his head and you see him slumping against the chair “What were you talking about?”
“Yuta’s birthday.” you blurt out at the same time as Taeyong says “My mom’s dinner.”
“Sorry…” you say smiling apologetically to your cousin “I’m sure Jaehyun won’t say anything.”
“So, Jae, we’re planning a birthday party,” Taeyong starts but you interrupt.
“You are being unreasonable.“ you scoff at your cousin “Your idea doesn’t make ANY sense. You can’t make a surprise party when you plan to invite half campus.”
“Could you, please, shut up?” he warns, lifting his index finger in your direction “I was telling her that we could throw a big surprise party and invite everyone to celebrate Yuta’s birthday.”
“Basically, he wants to throw one of your frat parties and expects Yuta to be surprised. This is a terrible idea.” you say crossing your arms over your chest “I suggest something more intimate, for his close friends…”
“You’re just saying this because you don’t like our parties. They are the most fun-“ Jaehyun interrupts Taeyong before he can finish.
“I agree with your cousin, hyung.” you and Taeyong quickly shift your attention to the boy “She has a point. You can’t expect that everyone you invite won’t tell Yuta. And it’s his birthday, he should celebrate with people that actually care about him,” he sips his iced coffee before continuing “We can make a small surprise party. I heard Winwin is planning to visit us and Johnny knows one of his classmates, he can ask-“
"No, not Johnny.” you interrupt him “He will end up telling Yuta about the party.”
“I can try talking to the guy, I guess.” he smiles and you nod happily.
“See, Taeyong, that’s what we call a good idea,” you say and he makes a disgusted face.
“Since when are you guys that close? You had your first date yesterday!“ your cousin teases you and you throw a banana at him.
“It was a friendly dinner.” Jaehyun corrects Taeyong, copying your words from yesterday. You smile, even though a tiny part of you felt a little bit hurt that he didn’t consider it a date. “And this has nothing to do with our new friendship, I’m just being fair.”
Taeyong hums looking at the younger boy suspiciously.
“I do think we can throw a party for him at a bowling alley, though. Does he like bowling? Maybe an arcade-” you start ranting but Jaehyun laughs at you.
“How old are you?” as soon as the question leaves his lips, Taeyong snickers.
“I told you it was childish.”
You place your elbows on the table and rests your cheeks on your hands. “I really wanted to go to an arcade,” you mumble.
“Go by yourself then,” Taeyong says, placing the banana you threw at him back on your tray. “I’ll create a group chat with you so we can think about the details.” he says, fishing his phone out of his pocket and widening his eyes when he looked at the time “I gotta go or I’ll be late for class.”
Jaehyun stands up at the same time as your cousin, gathering his belongings “I should go too.”
“It’s a surprise, don’t tell anyone.” Taeyong points a finger at you before waving goodbye.
“I’m not a snitch,” you say loud enough for him to hear you.
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You had to admit, the rest of your week went by quickly and nothing exciting happened. Except for one of your tutoring students. He was one of the exchange students Mrs. Park had warned you about. His language skills were still a bit rusty, but he was brilliant nevertheless.
Hendery Wong was so easygoing and fun to be with, that even boring tutoring sessions became bearable.
"So, you are telling me that I can’t use this structure here” he frowned and pointed at the same sentence for the third time “But in this other situation it is correct? It makes no sense!” he laughs and throws his pencil on the table.
“Hendery, you need to analyze the whole sentence. Pay attention to the syntax.”
“Y/N, you are a great tutor, but it’s been two hours and I’m starving.” he stopped you by placing his open palm in front of your face.
“You’re right, we should let this matter for the next session.” you started gathering your belongings while the guy next to you stood up.
“Do you wanna grab lunch together? But you are forbidden to talk about syntax or verb tenses.” you laughed at him and nod
“Yeah, that would be nice.”
“Great!”
Once you stood up and got ready to go, you realized the boy started giggling while looking at you.
“What’s wrong? Do I have something on my face?” you asked, palming your cheeks and forehead.
“No, it’s just that I was thinking,” the boy opened a big smile and you can’t help but mirror his action “You are really pretty."
That stuck to your head in a way that even now, on your way back from your aunt’s house, Taeyong could pinpoint there was something on your mind. He was on the passenger seat, looking at you curiously, and you could feel his stare.
“Spill it,” you say without taking your eyes off the road.
“Oh? Nothing. Just thinking about how I haven’t seen you since Tuesday.” he hums to an unfamiliar song and you frown “You’ll drop me first, right?”
“Sure. I need to give Johnny’s car back since you don’t have your own.”
“You should be the one with a car, I don’t even have a license.”
You scoff and he turns the radio on. You lived too far from your campus, so bringing your car with you wasn’t an option and Taeyong, being the useless cousin you think he is, doesn’t know how to drive. Johnny is nice enough to lend you his car once in a while. Taeyong said he would only need the car at night, so he didn’t mind if you took it today. It was a relief because going to your Aunt’s by bus was hell.
“Since you’ll drop me first, do you want to spend the night? It will be late to go home by yourself.”
“It’s 6:45, Taeyong. I’ve walked back to the dorms later than that.”
“We’re having a movie night. Maybe you can finally convince us to watch High School Musical.” he lifts his eyebrows suggestively.
“You know I always lose, everyone hates it.”
“Not everyone,” he emphasizes, but you shrug.
“I'll stay if you buy us pizza.”
“Deal.”
The rest of the ride is quiet. Taeyong falls asleep and you turn off the radio to avoid getting too distracted by the music. You have a license, but it doesn’t mean you are a confident driver.
Around thirty minutes later, you park Johnny’s car and go inside the big house with your cousin. Yuta was sprawled on the couch, reading a book and a guy you knew as Jungwoo was sleeping on the armchair. You could hear faint sounds coming from upstairs and you guessed it was Mark playing guitar. Or maybe Donghyuck’s screams while playing games, you weren’t sure.
Taeyong guides you to the kitchen and you find Taeil eating a bowl of something you couldn’t really guess what it was.
“Hyung, that’s my cousin.” Taeyong gets closer to the boy and whispers “She is going to help us with operation Osaka.”
“If you want to keep it a secret, maybe you shouldn’t call it operation Osaka.” the eldest jokes and you nod in agreement.
“Isn’t it frustrating living with Taeyong? He is so slow sometimes.” you sigh and hand your phone to your cousin. “I’m getting hungry.”
Taeyong tricked you into thinking that there was a movie night previously arranged. He said, however, the nicest things are done unplanned, so he invited the others. Mark and Jungwoo were the first ones to refuse. The first has a date with his girlfriend and Jungwoo is probably just not feeling it. Yuta stayed on the couch reading his book, not minding any of you. Donghyuck probably didn’t even listen to Taeyong, too engrossed in his games. The only ones left were you, Taeil, your cousin, and Johnny, who said would stay for just a while.
“What about Jaehyun?” you asked, bringing the beer cans to the living room. The words left your mouth before you could realize the consequences. You saw Johnny and Taeyong smirking and Yuta taking his eyes off the book and staring at you. “I mean, the more, the merrier.”
“Jaehyunnie has been locked in his room since yesterday. He said something about a project.” Taeil was the one who answered you.
“We shouldn’t bother him, then,” you say handling Yuta a beer and drinking your own.
“Oh, cousin,” Johnny called, making you roll your eyes.
“I’m not your cousin, John-”
“Where were you on Friday?” he smiles at Taeyong and looks back at you.
“You usually have lunch with us,” Taeyong says and proceeds to sip his drink to hide his growing smile.
“Oh, yeah, I’m sorry about that! I had lunch with someone else.”
“We are aware,” Johnny says not-so-innocently. “A little bird told me you had lunch with Hendery Wong, the hot exchange student.”
“I seriously hate this little bird of yours,” you say motioning your body to look at the TV. “and he suggested we had lunch together only because I was tutoring him.”
“Having lunch with the students it’s not part of a tutor’s job.” Yuta says as he closes his book “Taeil hyung, stop scrolling and choose a movie already!”
“He was just being nice,” you mumble, but Taeyong hears it.
“First Jaehyun, now Hendery? Your standards are too high for your own good.” he whispers playfully and you hit his legs.
Once the three boxes of pizza were opened in front of you and the movie started playing, you let yourself relax on your spot on the floor. You felt your eyes flutter and slowly close. You weren’t a very energetic person, and the previous week seemed to have drained all of your energy. You woke up to someone poking your cheeks.
Johnny was already gone and Taeyong was sleeping beside you. Yuta and Taeil were the only ones paying attention to the movie. You turn your head to see Donghyuck smiling down at you while holding a plate with three slices of pizza.
“Oh, hey, Hyuck,” you say, adjusting yourself. “You can eat it if you want.”
“I ate it already. I’m offering you the opportunity of taking this upstairs and giving it to Jaehyun hyung,” he says placing the plate on your hands and making his way between you and Taeyong. “You should also take a beer or two with you.”
“Why don’t you take it?”
“Shhhh.” you hear an annoyed Yuta.
After exchanging glances and engaging in a silent fight with Donghyuck, you stand up and go straight to the kitchen to grab two cans of beer. Why were you listening to him? Why was your heart beating faster the closer you got to the staircase? What if Jaehyun was asleep? Or, maybe, he just wanted to be alone. You pondered if you should leave the food at his doorstep, knock the door, and run back to the living room.
But why were you so afraid to knock on a simple door? Because it was Jaehyun’s.
Even though he had acknowledged that you were friends and, now, you could manage to hold a proper conversation with him, you couldn’t help but stay very conscious about your own words and actions. What if Jaehyun realized you were actually very awkward and not interesting? Or worse, he could find out about your crush and distance himself from you. Then, all your efforts to build a friendship will be in vain.
You were overthinking about knocking a door. Jaehyun will make you go insane.
When you are about to knock, you see one of the doors in the hall opening and Jaehyun getting out. He looks taken aback at first by the sight of you in front of his door, trying to hold a plate and two cans of beer. But then, he smiles and reaches to grab the cans from your arms.
“Hey, I didn’t know you were here.”
“Taeyong invited me for a movie night.”
“And what about these?” he asks, lifting the beers and pointing his chin at the plate you were holding.
“Oh, these are for you. Taeil said you didn’t leave your room the whole day.”
“Yeah, I’m still fixing that project from Tuesday.” he moves to open his bedroom door and you glance at the amount of paper, glue, and materials you couldn’t even name. It was a mess. “I would invite you in, but I don’t think I can fit anyone else in here.”
“Oh my God, Jaehyun.” you widen your eyes and he feels his ears getting hot from embarrassment “Do you need help? I can start cleaning…”
“No, no, please,” the boy says, placing the beers somewhere and taking the plate of pizza off your hands “Go back to watch the movie.”
“You seriously need help.” you look around once again and then turn your gaze back at his face “Plus, the movie is not that fun.”
And that’s how you spend the next few hours with him. While he took a break to eat the things you brought, you started separating garbage from the things Jaehyun would actually use. Just by finishing that, he got back half of his room. Then, once the boy went back to the project, he gave you some little tasks like cutting some paper squares and handing him utensils. Jaehyun even made sure to explain to you what you were doing and talked about his project. Most of the time you just nodded in agreement, not really understanding what he said. What you did get was that the model he was building represented 40% of his grade. If you were him, you would be freaking out too.
“I had to rebuild the whole thing except for these details,” he says, pointing to one of the benches on your hand.
“And your group didn’t help with anything?” you ask, extending your open hand for him to get another tree.
“I wouldn’t let Naeun get close to this again. If she touches it, I might actually kill her.” Jaehyun mumbles while using tweezers to glue the tree on his project. He had his lips puckered, focusing on his task.
You stay silent for a moment, watching the boy cautiously finishing the details of his work. Now that you were focused on analyzing his figure, you perceived how tired Jaehyun must be. His tousled hair looked dirty and his eyes were adorned by eyebags and dark circles. You saw him yawning frequently and sometimes you could see him batting his eyelashes swiftly, to whisk away his sleepiness.
“Did you sleep last night?” you ask, giving him the last tree that was on your hand.
“Not really.”
“Shouldn’t you go to sleep, then?”
“I will once I finish my next assignment.” he says, motioning to grab a brush that was behind him “Don’t worry about me.”
“It’s hard not too when you look like a panda,” you answer and he smiles, but doesn’t answer. “Wait, what do you mean by ‘next assignment’?”
“I need to hand in an essay on Monday.” he mumbles, placing the last tree next to the main building of the model “But it’s almost ready, I just need to proofread it.”
“I can proofread it for you. Where is it?” you ask standing up and looking around.
“It’s fine, sit down.” he holds your hand and pulls it in his direction “You’ve helped a lot already.”
“The only thing I did was stare and hold some trees,” you say quietly, looking at his fingers holding your hands.
“You helped with the grass. The grass was important.” he smiles and pulls you with more strength now “Come on, sit down. You also helped me to not fall asleep, that’s important.”
“You know that you are too tired to proofread your essay properly, right?” you say sitting beside him again. “Plus, I’m one of the tutors of Academic Writing. Proofreading is what I do the most.”
“If I promise to go to sleep and finish my essay tomorrow, will you shut up?”
“Why can’t I proofread it for you?” you tilt your head to the side.
“You’re smarter than me, you’ll see my dumb mistakes,” he mutters and you smile at him.
“We all make dumb mistakes, Jaehyun.” you sigh and start gathering the unused utensils around you “Fine, at least let me help you organize this mess.”
Yuta is the one that comes and takes you out of your bubble. Jaehyun was giving his model the final touches while you were placing one of his books back to the shelf. The elder knocked on the door and entered before Jaehyun could answer it.
“Jae, are you- oh!” Yuta looks at you surprised “I didn’t know you were here. We thought you left before the movie ended.”
“She was helping me.” Jaehyun says without looking at his friend “Hyung, can you take the dishes downstairs for us, please?”
“Yeah…” the other boy exchanges glances between the both of you before leaving and kindly takes the plate and the two empty cans downstairs with him.
“You take your phone out of your pocket and surprise yourself with the time. “I should get going, it’s getting late.”
“How will you go back?” he asks standing up from his spot on the floor and stretching his arms.
“It’s only a 15-minute walk, I’m used to it.” Before you can reach the door, Jaehyun holds your arm and pulls you to his side.
“Look at the floor, you were about to step on the scissors.” he scolds you while you just stare at his facial features. How can he manage to look gorgeous and a complete mess at the same time? “Taeyong is going with you, right?”
“Taeyong is probably asleep by now.” you chuckle and try to avoid any other sharp utensil on the floor.
“You’re going home alone? At this time?” he follows you to the hall and stops at his door frame.
“What do you want me to do? Sleep here?” you question him playfully.
“Well, you slept here last week. I wouldn’t mind sharing my bed. Again.”
And then, you swear you see him smirking.
“Are you flirting with me?” you blurt out and pretend to sound uninterested.
“I might be.”
You feel your cheeks burning and avoid meeting his gaze.
“You are really shameless, aren’t you?”
“I was just kidding, silly.” he laughs and pats your head “I’m actually offering to walk you home.”
You quickly turn your head to meet his face. “No, I won’t accept your company.”
“Why?” he says putting a hand on his chest soundings genuinely offended “I was kidding, I’m not flirting with you-”
“I don’t know how to feel about this,” you mumble, quite offended this time “I guess I should say thank you?” you giggle and stop at the top of the staircase “I appreciate your offer, but you look really, really tired. Just go to sleep before you start hallucinating from sleep deprivation.”
Instinctively, you cup his cheeks on your hands and look at him seriously “Please. Go. To. Sleep.” you take your hands out of his face, leaving Jaehyun’s cheeks numb and his ears, red.
“It’s dangerous for you to walk alone at night.” he stutters, a bit flustered from your sudden affectionate touch.
Before you realized, you were already on the ground floor. Donghyuck was cuddling Taeil, both asleep on the floor.
“And you’re suggesting you will protect me if something happens?” you whisper passing by the two of them in the living room “You can barely keep your eyes open. I’ll be more worried about you walking back here alone. No way.”
“I told you to stop worrying about me.” he gets closer to you just to hold the doorknob, stopping you from opening it.
“Then you shouldn’t worry about me either.” you take his hand from the handle and open it.
“You ladies keep complaining about the death of chivalry,” he says leaning on the door frame “but here you are, ignoring my attempts.”
“Oh, you’re such a gentleman.” you mock him and he shakes his head smiling. “Goodbye, Jaehyun.”
“Text me as soon as you get home,” he shouts to make sure you listen.
And you did. Your cheeks blushed at his words and you couldn’t dare to look back, but if you did, you would see Jaehyun standing still in front of the house, and only getting in once your figure was out of frame.
The boy has always admired you, even though you only small-talked before. He found you smart and it was funny watching you and Johnny bickering all the time. The morning you woke up beside him was clearly a shock. Jaehyun didn’t know you well enough to share a bed with you, but, somehow, he felt that was the beginning of your new friendship.
Once he got inside, he saw Donghyuck whining while Taeil pushed him away.
“Get off me, Donghyuck.”
“I’m gonna make some ramyeon, do you want it?” Jaehyun asks while walking past them.
The youngest stands up and follows Jaehyun to the kitchen. Taeil takes advantage of this and quickly goes to his room, not even saying goodbye to the other two.
“What happened upstairs?” the younger had a mischievous grin on his face.
Jaehyun prefers to ignore Donghyuck as he doesn’t understand the question. “Do you want ramyeon or not?”
“Yeah, put on a pack for me” he takes three packs from the cabinet and throws them on the kitchen counter while Jahyun fills a pan with water. “What happened after Y/N went upstairs to give you some food?”
“How do you know that?”
“Because I’m omniscient.” he uses a sarcastic tone, “I told her to take that to you, being the caring dongsaeng I am, obviously.”
“Your jokes are getting funnier each day.” Jaehyun deadpans and Donghyuck smiles. “Nothing happened.”
“I saw her leaving just now and it’s almost two…” the younger uses a suggestive tone, making Jaehyun roll his eyes.
“She was helping me with my project,” he answers simply, making the boy groan.
“That bitch is slow as fuck.” he mumbles and Jaehyun smiles.
“I talked to Johnny about it and, now, I’ll ask you too,” he says after getting three eggs from the fridge. “Stop putting her in uncomfortable situations. The other day, Johnny invited me to dinner and when I got there, she looked like she would collapse at any moment.”
“She spent four hours watching you cutting paper, do you think she really feels uncomfortable around you?” he shrugs and continues “Plus, you both seem to be a lot closer. Text me when you get home? You don’t even open our messages.”
Jaehyun’s ears start getting red while he faces the younger boy “How do you- Yah, Donghyuck, you shouldn’t be eavesdropping.”
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“Do you remember that project I did three weeks ago?” Jaehyun says excitedly.
Today was Friday, one of the only week-days you could see your friends - at least the ones who didn’t live with you or you didn’t share classes with. At the moment, Jiwoo is sitting next to you in the cafeteria, Johnny in front of her and Taeyong nowhere to be seen. Jaehyun appeared now, taking the other seat beside you.
“The one with the building and the trees?” you ask, taking a bite of your apple pie.
“He is an architecture student, every project involves buildings and trees” Johnny snickers and Jaehyun shows him his tongue.
“Not every project.” the boy takes a paper out of his bag and places it on the table, right beside you. “We got the grades today. It got 3.5 out of 4.” he flashes you a smile and you swallow your food harshly.
“That’s amazing!” you cheer on him, taking a closer look at the paper. “Is there any feedback about the grass? I was the one who made it,” you say the last part leaning on Jiwoo, who didn’t give you much attention.
“He didn’t mention the grass specifically,” Jaehyun smiles at how focused you were on the feedback note on your hand “But I can assure you it was exquisitely applied.”
“Wow, Jae’s using big words,” Taeyong appears behind you, greeting everyone and giving you a hug.
“You should celebrate it,” you say, giving his feedback note back.
“And what type of celebration would you recommend me, miss?” he playfully asks, stealing one of Taeyong’s fries without the older seeing.
“She will give you the WORST recommendations,” Jiwoo interferes before you even open your mouth “There is a professor that haunts Y/N and every assignment she finishes, her celebration is sleeping.”
“Or eating ice cream and then, sleeping,” Taeyong says with his mouth full of food.
“Last year, we went to the movie theater to celebrate the end of midterms and she slept before the movie had even started,” your roommate says, making everyone laugh.
“We’re going to the club tonight, Jae.” Johnny says and turns his head to Jiwoo “You’re coming, right?”
“I don’t know, I have to read some of Hendery’s notes and-” you start and Johnny interrupts you.
“Yeah, yeah, you rarely come. I was asking Jiwoo.”
You love seeing your friends happy, especially when, somehow, you are a part of it. However, since that double date - or friendly dinner, whatever helps you sleep at night - you couldn’t help but feel jealous. Your great friends were dating each other (they didn’t admit it yet, but it wasn’t really needed) and you couldn’t help but feel neglected. Jiwoo started to spend more time at Johnny’s than at your dorm, being considerate as you have already walked in when they were in a heavy make-out session.
“Yeah, sure,” she answers tucking her hair behind her ear. You gag on her action and she hits your shoulder.
“Movie theater is a good option though,” Jaehyun says bringing your attention back to him. “There are some new movies that seem nice.”
“Did you see they released a new one that’s based on a book?” you turn your whole body on the chair to face the boy beside you. “The book is so good. It’s a thriller and it’s narrated in the first person, so you only see the story from the character’s point of view. And, then, she starts going insane…”
“Is it that book you have been begging me to read?” Taeyong asks and you nod furiously.
“I really wanna watch this movie,” you add excitedly
“Let’s watch it then,” he suggests looking at you and smiles when he sees your blushing cheeks. “All of us, I mean. To celebrate my temporary freedom from that class.” he clears his throat and looks at the other at the table.
“I’m in, when do you wanna go?”
Taeyong asks, eating one of his fries. Johnny and Jiwoo simultaneously try to kick his ankle from under the table but end up kicking themselves instead.
“What about today after class? We can get the evening session,” he asks, watching your reaction from the corner of his eyes.
“I’ll have to get ready for the club, you know,,” Johnny says quickly and looks at Taeyong expectantly, but your cousin is still focused on his food.
“I have to run some errands too,” Jiwoo adds “But I’m sure Y/N is free. Her classes end at 3p.m!”
“I really wanted to,” you start and your frustrated tone gives away you’re not going to make it “but as I said, need to read some essays from the students and prepare some notes to help Hendery. Sorry.”
“You can do it during the weekend,” Jiwoo says, nudging your side.
“Stop hitting me!” you whisper to her.
“Well, I’m free.” Taeyong lifts his head and smiles at Jaehyun “We can go together, then.”
“Taeyong, won’t you come to the club with us tonight?” Johnny asks the other boy, giving him a knowing look.
“No, I told you they banned from that-” he grunts when Johnny successfully kicks his ankle from under the table. “Oh, right, yeah, I totally forgot about that. Sorry, I won’t make it.”
“Are you sure you can’t come, Y/N?” he asks you again and you feel Jiwoo elbowing your ribs once again.
“Stupid bitch, he’s asking you on a date,” she whispers and you silently ask her to stop.
“Guess I’ll celebrate at the club then. You should come too, at least for an hour.” he says poking your arm “You helped me finish it. It’s practically your project too.”
“If you don’t accept Jaehyun’s invitation right now,” Jiwoo leans to whisper in your ear, “I’ll lock our room and you’ll have to sleep on the hallway for the rest of the weekend.”
“I have the key too, you know,” you whisper back.
“I wanna see you try to open the door with the drawer blocking it.” She sits back and happily, goes back to talk to Johnny.
What if she was reading everything wrong? If Jaehyun wanted to go on a date, he would promptly ask you. Everyone knows how straightforward the boy can be. However, he invited everyone. You did want to say yes, but there were so many things to be done. Deep down, you knew it was just an excuse. You didn’t want to fool yourself into thinking that the boy’s invitation meant something more than just watching a movie. Still, he was your friend, how could you disappoint a friend who worked so hard and deserved to celebrate.
“I guess I can do my assignments tomorrow,” you lean closer to Jaehyun and say in a low tone “Let’s go to the movies.”
“Are you sure?” he questions furrowing his brows.
“Yes! Don’t worry.”
“Okay,” he nods and rubs your back. "Just don’t forget to text me when your last class is finished.”
“I will.”
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“How did you like it?” Jaehyun asked you on your way out to the theatre, his arms around your shoulders.
“It was fine,” you answer, slightly nervous by the sudden proximity.
Truthfully, you had a hard time focusing on the movie. How could you when your hands were constantly meeting when both of you went to grab a handful of popcorn or when he laid his head on your shoulder to take a short nap? It was especially hard to pay attention to the movie when he started playing with your hand that was on the armrest during the last twenty minutes.
“It was kinda boring,” he says, guiding you to the exit and adding a distance between both of you once you reach the street. “I didn’t feel the thrill at all.”
“Well, I did,” you mumble, thinking about everything that happened but the movie itself “I’m just disappointed by the fact that this has nothing to do with the book. Not even the plot is the same.”
“The movie was your idea and it was terrible.” he playfully nudges you and you gasp, pretending to be offended “I’m afraid of how tedious the book must be.”
“Well, we could have watched any other movie. You didn’t need to choose that one.”
“But you wanted to watch it.” he pouts and you can feel your heart pounding on your throat. “Anyways, it’s almost seven now. If you get ready fast enough, we can get a ride for the club.”
“And who says I’m going to the club?” you raise an eyebrow and cross your arms around your chest.
“I am.” he takes your hand in his and hushes you to walk faster.
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“Yuta’s birthday is this Saturday, don’t forget.” Taeyong reminds you before hanging up.
How can you forget since this is all he has been talking about this week? You started to regret helping your cousin with the surprise party considering the amount of work you had on your hands. You should have seen this coming. You spent three peaceful weeks without any new responsibilities. Suddenly, all your professors decide to schedule assignments and exams for this week. You were on the verge of killing anyone who crossed your path until someone really did.
“You’ll get wrinkles if you don’t stop frowning,” Jaehyun said beside you.
“Where did you come from?” you asked, slightly annoying for getting startled by his sudden presence.
“I was laying down right there,” he pointed to the green area on your right side “when I saw you getting out of your class.”
“Don’t you have classes? How come you are always doing nothing when we meet on campus?” you adjusted the books that were on your arms and Jaehyun noticed.
“No, I don’t have classes,” he said, taking the books from your hold “I work my ass off on those projects because it’s fun. Why are you so irritable today? Where are you going?”
“Library, I need to return them,” you say without complaining and appreciating your friend’s gesture. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. I’m just exhausted,” you said under your breath, but Jaehyun listened and used his free arm to embrace your shoulders to bring you closer.
“You know you owe me, right?” he whispered close to your ear and smiled at your flustered state.
“Uh?” you turned your head to meet his face and held your breath when you saw he wasn’t many inches away from you.
Jaehyun suspected about your behavior even before you became friends. You weren’t the most subtle person in the world, so it didn’t take him long to realize you had a tiny crush on him and got embarrassed every time he got more physical or playfully flirted with you. He found it awfully cute when you gave him the same stunned expression you are wearing right now: lips parted, wide eyes, and hot cheeks.
“You owe me a movie date.”
“A what?” you said louder than necessary, avoiding his gaze, and he laughs.
“A movie day,” he corrected, chuckling while you sighed.
“I don’t owe you any date or whatever,” you mumbled taking his arms off your shoulders “Stop with the frat boy behavior, I don’t like it when you do this.”
“Do what?” he asked innocently, smiling when you scowled at him and resumed your walk to the library “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Plus, I am a frat boy.”
“I am aware of it,” you said in disdain. “Why would I owe you a movie day?”
“Don’t you remember that terrible movie we watched together last month? I deserve compensation,” he said reaching your side and placing his arms back on your shoulders.
“You were the one who insisted on paying for my tickets. Do you want me to pay you back?” you asked genuinely and Jaehyun shook his head quickly.
“What? No! Of course not, silly.” he took off his arm from your shoulder just to flick your forehead “I said you owe me a movie, not money.”
“So you wanna go out this week? I’m sorry I can’t-” you guessed and he shook his head again, stopping you.
“You can come over and we watch it together. A little bird told me…”
“What does that frat house of yours have with little birds? Oh my God you guys really love gossiping, don’t you?” you scoff, and Jaehyun laughs.
“Johnny told me you love High School Musical.”
“Yeah, it’s a childhood classic.”
“Me too.” you swiftly turned your head to him as you heard him say “I like High School Musical too. Let’s watch it on Friday.”
“Are you kidding me?” you asked in disbelief.
“I’m not. You can come over after you finish your assignments. A High School Musical marathon will be waiting for you.” Jaehyun slowed down his pace as he saw the library entrance “You can’t say no, you owe me.”
And that’s how you ended up in Jaehyun’s bedroom on a Friday night.
He is currently in the kitchen getting popcorn and drinks ready while you are preparing the room for the High School Musical marathon. You place Jaehyun’s laptop on the bedside table and search for some blankets to cover the bedroom floor. You spent three whole days wondering if it was really a good idea to come over and watch movies with Jaehyun. You knew it wasn’t good for your heart, especially when you were already falling for him - for nobody’s surprise.
You have to keep reminding yourself that you are just friends and you should be happy about it. Being friends it’s better than strangers, isn’t it? But there is something strangely familiar with the way he places his arms around your shoulders and invites you over, on a Friday night, just to watch childish movies. There is a knock on the door and you stand up to open it, thinking that it must be Jaehyun with his hands full, but you see your cousin.
“Hey, Jae- pumpkin?” Taeyong tilts his head to the side looking puzzled “I didn’t know you were here.”
“Yeah, Jaehyun invited me to watch the High School Musical movies with him.” you shrug. “Do you wanna come in? There’s space for you.”
“Oh, no, no. I was just- nevermind.” Taeyong was about to joke about how you too seemed like a couple, but he decides that it’s better if you keep your good mood. “The boys are going out to celebrate Yuta’s birthday.” he finishes and you frown.
“But the party…” you whisper and he chuckles.
“Yeah, I mean, it’s kind of our tradition to celebrate our birthdays the day before too. Hyuck calls it a farewell party.”
“Did you tell them about tomorrow?”
“Not yet. I’ll tell them in the morning,” he says and rubs his hands on his back pockets
“Aren’t you going with them?”
“No, I have to stop you and Jaehyun from doing funny business,” he lets out and you hit his shoulder “Stop hitting me! I’m kidding. Doyoung is arriving late at night so I’ll stay to help him sneak in.”
“Won’t they suspect it?”
“Don’t worry, I’m a good actor,” he says patting your head “Well, enjoy your date.”
“This is not a date!” you scream as he goes away, leaving you alone.
Downstairs, Mark, Johnny, Donghyuck, and Yuta are seated in the living room, waiting for Taeil. Taeyong glances at the kitchen and sees Jaehyun too engrossed in his task, so he takes it as an opportunity and runs to his friends.
“Do you know who’s upstairs?” he whispers sitting beside Johnny.
“Taeil hyung?” Mark questions and Donghyuck slaps the back of his neck.
“Y/N.”
The two younger guys gasp and Yuta takes his eyes off his phone screen, paying attention to his friends.
“That asshole said he had an important arrangement,” Yuta whispers in disbelief. “Don’t tell me you lied too, Taeyong.”
“I’m telling you the truth! I really need to finish an important report.” he lies “This upcoming week is being so hectic. I’m really sorry, Yuta.”
“The boy’s getting his dick wet, I would say it is very important,” Johnny giggles and Taeyong makes a face.
“She’s my cousin, man.”
“I doubt it.” Donghyuck speaks up “I bet 10 bucks nothing will happen. That chick is dumb.”
“Yo, I think Jaehyun hyung will take it to the next level” Mark replies back.
“Make it 15,” Yuta intervenes “He’ll get some tonight.”
“20 on Hyuck,” Johnny says “He will kiss her, she will freak out and won’t look at his face for the next three weeks.”
“How much are you betting, Mark?” Donghyuck asks the older and Taeyong stands up to flick the youngest’s forehead.
“Stop betting on my cousin’s sex life.”
They hear a thud is coming from upstairs and everyone looks up. A faint “are you okay?” is heard and several seconds later, Taeil is in the living room with the others.
“Yah, Taeyong, why was your cousin climbing on Jaehyun’s closet?” the oldest says chuckling. “She fell, but I think she’s fine.”
“I told you, she’s dumb” Donghyuck mocks.
A few minutes later, everyone is gone and the only ones in the house are Taeyong, you, and Jaehyun. Differently from you, the latter doesn’t even spare a glance at Taeyong when he asks if he could join your movie night. The younger just grins and sends him a middle finger.
Different from what his roommates expected, Jaehyun planned this movie night with absolutely no other intention rather than spending some quality time with you. He saw your distressed state and it hurt him to know he could do nothing to help you with your exams. The least he could do was try to comfort you with food, as a good friend would.
“Y/N, what are you doing?” he asks, placing the popcorn bucket and the drinks on his writing desk and going straight to your direction. You are standing on his swivel chair, on your toes, trying to reach the comforter that was on the top shelf of his closet.
“I’m… almost…” you touch the cloth at the same time Jaehyun holds your waist. His hands were gripping your sides, securing you in place.
“Get this before you fall.” the boy warns you, squeezing you gently.
“I already fell.” you pull the comforter and it hits the ground. Jaehyun extends his hand for you to take it. “Taeil helped me, though.”
“Did you get hurt?” he holds your face in his hands, looking at you attentively and it doesn’t fail to make you flustered.
“I’m fine, I’m fine.” you push his hands, avoiding his gaze. “Let’s start!”
Both of you sit down against the bed and you press play on the movie. Once the movie started, you could feel your heart getting warmer, memories from your childhood days flooding your mind as you still remembered some of the characters’ lines and, mostly, all the songs lyrics. You refrain yourself from singing the first three songs, embarrassed by Jaehyun’s presence, but once you hit the middle of the first movie, both of you were already making duos and you even stand up to perform ‘When There Was Me and You” making Jaehyun cackle as you use one of his middle school pictures as a fake Troy Bolton poster.
You wake up against Jaehyun’s chest feeling your back sore from the position. Your butt is numb and your legs were tangled in his. The boy has one arm around your body while the other is resting on your thigh. The laptop screen is black and you guess it has turned off. You lift your head to find Jaehyun’s head hanging back, resting on the bed’s mattress. It will certainly cause him a stiff neck. You smoothly remove yourself from his hold and stretch out as you stand up. You place the empty popcorn bucket on Jaehyun’s desk and close his laptop. You couldn’t find your phone, but from his window, you could see it was really dark outside. You had to go back to your dorm, but you couldn’t leave your friend laying down like that.
“Jaehyun,” you whisper “Jae, wake up.” you poke his face. “You’ll get hurt if you keep sleeping in this position.”
Your hands find his hair and softly pats his head. Jaehyun was warm, soft, and smelled so good.
“Jae, wake up, I can’t carry you to bed.” You keep moving one of your hands against his hair while the other is caressing his face until you see his eyes fluttering open. He groans as he moves his neck and you smile softly.
“What time is it, babe?” his husky voice and the sudden nickname catch you off guard.
“Uh… It’s late.” you answer moving away from him “I just woke you up to tell you to go to bed. You’ll hurt your neck.”
“Are you leaving?” he asks with his eyes barely open.
“Yeah, I need to go. You can keep sleeping, though.”
You start standing up and searching for your shoes, but Jaehyun presses himself against your back, enveloping you in a hug.
“No, don’t go. It’s dangerous,” he whispers in your ears and rests his forehead on the crook of your neck, making you freeze.
“I need to go,” you try to take his arms off you, only for him to hold you tighter. “Jaehyun, stop,” you use your most serious tone, but he pretends not to listen. “You’re such a child.”
“Stay the night. I’m too tired to walk you back to your dorm” he lifts his head to look at your side profile “and I won’t let you go alone.”
“I’ve walked alone so many times before…” you mumble and he buries his face on your neck again.
“Now you have me, you don’t have to walk alone again.”
You feel your heart beating faster at his words. If you weren’t already nervous enough with his sudden physical affection, his words completed the job of making your heart rate skyrocket. You keep on the silent battle to try to free yourself from his grasp and you feel him smirking against your skin.
“You know I’m stronger, babe.” There it goes, the damn nickname again.
“Fine, fine.” you give in, not bearing the current situation anymore “If it means you’ll let go of me, I’ll stay.”
He instantly releases you and pats your head. You start gathering your belongings, finding your purse and your shoes, but still looking for your phone.
“I’ll find it tomorrow,” you say to yourself and look at Jaehyun getting some clothes from his closet “Well, goodnight, then” you raise your hand and wave goodbye, but he catches your arm before you can turn to leave.
“Where are you going? You said you’re staying,” he asks genuinely confused.
“To Taeyong’s bedroom,” you answer as if it is the most obvious thing in the world.
“That’s- why-” he frowns and gets closer to you “That’s not what I meant when I asked for you to stay.”
“What do you-”
“I asked you to sleep here.”
“Yeah, Jaehyun, I heard it. I’m staying in the house tonight.”
“With me.”
You gulp at his words. You definitely don’t like this game he was playing with you. You could bear the daily messages and the playful pickup lines, but this was going over the line. Why does he always insist on walking you to your dorm or buy two cupcakes at the cafeteria just to give you one because he knows it’s your favorite? Why invite you to watch childish movies with you on a Friday night when he can just go out with his friends and have fun? Why is he always giving you sudden hugs or holding your hands? Why would he call you ‘babe’? Does he know you like him? Is he trying to prove a point? You aren’t sure what this is, but you are seriously afraid of getting hurt.
“Sleep here with me. We shared a bed before, I don’t mind doing it again,” he continues, bringing your attention back to him.
“I asked you to stop doing this,” you pull your arm from his hold and walk two steps back.
“I’m not doing anything-”
“This behavior. Stop acting like this.” you repeat raising your voice a little bit “Quit playing with me.”
“What are you saying? I’m not playing with you!” he reaches for your hand again, but you deflect.
“Stop flirting with people if you don’t mean it.”
Your voice is stern and you see Jaehyun adjusting his posture.
“Who says I’m flirting with you?” he regrets what he said as soon as he sees your disappointed expression.
Why would you feel disappointed when this is exactly the answer you were expecting? It wasn’t the answer you wanted, though, and deep down you knew it. Your anger leaves your body as sadness takes over, but you manage to smile.
“I’m glad I haven’t misread your actions then. We’re just good friends.”
Jaehyun doesn’t understand why his heart clenched at your words. They were completely true: you were nothing but good friends. He doesn’t have any feelings beyond friendship towards you. Or does he?
“Just don’t go bother your cousin, he must be asleep,”  he clears his throat and hands you a pair of sweatpants and a large t-shirt “There’s a spare toothbrush in the bathroom’s cabinet, you can get it.”
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You were thankful for being able to talk to Jaehyun like the conversation from the night before didn’t happen. You woke up alone on his bed. He was folding the blankets you left on the floor last night and flashed you a smile when he saw you awake. You realized the awkwardness was gone when he started cracking jokes with you. Jaehyun was treating you the same as before and you decided to forget about the conversation you had the night before.  It was like a silent agreement to not mention the sexual tension that both of you decided to ignore.
Once you went downstairs, you had an eventful breakfast though. Both of you found out your friends made a bet on your sexual life. Mark and Yuta believed you would have sex while Johnny and Haechan believed you were too shy to try something with Jaehyun. You were sure your cousin was in the middle of this, even though no one mentioned his name. Taeyong stayed too quiet during the whole breakfast for your liking. Jaehyun almost killed Donghyuck and Mark but said nothing to Johnny or Yuta because he knew he wouldn’t stand a chance against the older ones.
You went back to your dorm to change your clothes and get all of the things for the party Taeyong was hiding from Yuta. The rest of the day went smoothly once all of the boys were warned about the surprise party. The plan was to keep Yuta away until you guys got everything ready by the evening. You went back to their house with Jiwoo, who was glad to help Taeyong and Donghyuck decorating the house while you, Taeil, and Doyoung were preparing the food.
Donghyuck was sulking the entire time for not being warned beforehand about the party, calling your decoration plain and boring. After you found out it was him who started the whole bet thing, you just wanted to kick his face. However, you decided to do it after Yuta’s birthday, just to avoid a commotion.
One of Yuta’s great friends, Sicheng, was, indeed, coming for his birthday and everyone was really excited for his reaction. Even though he could only spend this weekend with his friend.
“He was supposed to arrive with me,” Doyoung explains to you “I was going to drive to the airport and bring him here with me, but his flight got delayed so he will arrive at 1 pm.”
“And he will leave on Sunday?” you ask, handing him the spatula.
“Unfortunately.”
“He said to me he has exams on Tuesday,” Taeil completes “ And his birthday is two days after Yuta’s, he probably wants to spend it with his family.”
“Well, I hope he can at least enjoy his time around.”
The party was supposed to start at 5 pm, so everyone was running against the clock. At 1, Doyoung left you and Taeil in the kitchen to go pick up Sicheng at the airport and by 4, everything was ready, the guests arriving for the party. Taeyong, being the one of the only ones with a suite, kindly let you and Jiwoo use his room to get ready. Your roommate brought both of your clothes with her, and you had to admit you should have expected her to choose something you wouldn’t like.
“I just asked you to grab pants and a shirt!” you complain to her with your clothes in hand.
“And I did!” she uses her mascara to point at you “You act like those clothes aren’t yours. I took them from your drawers!”
“I know they are mine but-”
“No buts,” she gets out of Taeyong’s bathroom to face you. “I’m tired of watching you wearing rags when you have nice clothes. This is a party, woman, you need to show what you came here for.”
“I know, I just- This is…” you look at the skinny pants on your hands, different from the ones you’re used to wearing “so tight. I’ll get all…”
“All the attention, because it will hug you in all the right places. Come on” she whines and you smile at her. She was right.
You were so used to puttin on the same set of jeans and loose t-shirts everyday. You deserved to look good once in a while. Although your bottom was tight, your friends chose a loose long sleeve shirt for you to use, which you silently thanked her for. The weather was starting to get chilly, and you are the type who gets cold easily.
When you were both ready, you went downstairs to see a considerable number of people. Yuta seemed to be really popular in University. It isn’t really shocking though, since it is known how kind and polite the boy is.
When Yuta arrives, everyone screams ‘surprise!’ and starts singing the happy birthday song, he freezes. It takes him a moment to absorb the whole situation, especially when he sees Doyoung and Sicheng holding his cake.
“I wanted to make something special because it’s your last year,” Taeyong says hugging the guy “I know you will graduate soon, so I want you to miss us when you’re gone.”
“Thank you so much, guys!” he says after blowing the candles. “OH, WAIT. Can we light up some other candles? Winwin’s birthday is in two days, let’s sing for him too!”
That is how you spend the evening. It’s different from what you are used to when it comes to parties and this frat house. Not only the time of the day, but everything seems impersonal, cold. Now, watching these boys hanging out together, you start to understand why your cousin loves them so much: they are his family.
If the atmosphere is different, their craziness is the same. You were trying to hold a proper conversation with Mark’s girlfriend, Doyoung and Jungwoo when Donghyuck dragged you to one of his drinking games. He makes sure that you never win so you can take enough shots of vodka to make you feel dizzy.
When you are trying to sober up by eating some of the cupcakes you baked a couple of hours before, it’s Jiwoo’s time to drag you out of the kitchen and place you in a circle in the living room. With both of your hands occupied and your mouth full of icing, you watch Johnny putting on a show just to officially ask your roommate to be his girlfriend. Everyone cheered loudly for them, you including. You are glad that your friends found each other, even though it also means that now they will do everything together, including annoying you.
You are still a little bit too happy when Jaehyun comes to you and hands you a bottle of beer. You haven’t talked to him until then, but it wasn’t like you were avoiding him. Actually, you were preventing yourself from being teased by your friends.
“Wow you look…” he stops for a moment to check you out while sipping his drink.
“What? Too much, right?” you ask, starting to feel self-conscious. "I told Jiwoo…”
“No, your pants look great on you.” he stops you by pointing at you “I was just trying to find the right words. I don’t want to sound like a frat boy, since you keep asking me not to.”
You lower your head and lean on the kitchen counter. So he didn’t forget the previous night conversation.
“I was gonna say that you look hot as fuck,” you can see Jaehyun’s shoes touching yours, warning you that it would be dangerous to look up “and that I was ready to risk our friendship just to make out with you right now.”
You look up and instantly regret your action once you see him up close. Jaehyun traps you between his body and the counter. You feel your heart on your throat and something tingles inside you. You lock eyes with Jaehyun who doesn’t seem to notice your nervousness because he, himself, was dealing with his. Why did he suddenly feel the urge to make a move on you? You are his friend. But friends are not supposed to think about the other in the same way he was thinking about you right now. All he wanted was to kiss you in a way friends should do. He wanted to touch you, he wanted to do things to you that friends definitely shouldn’t do.
“Jaehyun…” the way you whisper his name, so close to his lips, makes him want to kiss you so badly. “I asked you to stop.”
“I’m not doing anything.” he whispers back with his body over yours while looking at your lips.
“I don’t like this game.”
“Good, because I’m not playing.”
You will blame the alcohol later, right now, you are too busy feeling Jaehyun against your lips. He had one hand on the counter behind you while the other circled your waist, bringing you impossibly close to his body. You took no time to place one hand on his neck and the other on his shoulder, helping you to keep your balance. He gently grazes his tongue on your lower lip, asking for permission, and once you grant it, the kiss becomes way rougher than you expected. Jaehyun tastes like beer and cupcakes, bitter and sweet. You smile at the thought of him eating the cupcakes you put so much effort on. His hand that was on your waist, goes down to your lower back at the same time you put both of your arms around his neck and bring him closer. He takes a few steps back, separating you from the counter, just to bring his other hand to your butt, and smirking right after giving it a light squeeze.
He lowers both of his hands to the back of your thighs, suggesting that he wanted to lift you up. Once you lock your legs on his waist, he walks back to the counter, placing you there and staying between your legs. You were feeling hot like you’ve never felt before. Your fingers find their way on the back of his neck, pulling a few strands of hair making him hum in satisfaction.
When you break the kiss, filling your lungs with air, Jaehyun quickly places his lips to your jaw and then your neck. He bites your ear lobe and leaves a trail of wet kisses up to your collarbones. You bring your body closer to him as you feel his lips find a particular sensitive part of your neck. He keeps one of his hands on your lower back while the other massages your thigh.
When Jaehyun tries to find your lips again, you place your lips on his neck, leaving light marks all over it. You feel him tightening his grip on you as your teeth graze his sensitive skin and you smile. When you unconsciously grind your hips against him, the boy feels the urge to rip your clothes off right and then, until your eyes meet again.
Jaehyun looks at your eyes and suddenly he feels his heart clench. He couldn’t be rough with you, he didn’t want to. His heart was beating insanely faster when your lips met for the second time. He slowed down your rhythm, and now, kissing you gently and lovingly, he could properly feel you. Feeling your soft lips against his and your fingers caressing his neck. He could stay like that forever, but forever is a long time to ask for in this house.
Donghyuck enters the kitchen and doesn’t even try to be subtle:
“WOAH, TAEYONG HYUNG, YOUR COUSIN AND JAEHYUN ARE MAKING BABIES IN THE KITCHEN.”
If you wanted to kick his face before, now you were ready to kill him. You quickly detach yourself from Jaehyun’s hold, get off the counter and before leaving the room, you hear Jaehyun say:
“Lee Donghyuck, I’m gonna beat the shit out of you.”
In the living room, no one really seemed to care about the information that your younger friend had just screamed. Only Jiwoo and Taeyong looked at you suspiciously, but you shrug and sit down by his side.
“I’m leaving in five.”
“Why? We’re going to the club after this,” he asks, placing an arm around your shoulder “Are you sure you don’t wanna come?” he raises his eyebrows suggestively before laughing at you.
“I just won't go right now because I don’t want people thinking I’m running away from Jaehyun.”
“You are, though.”
“Yes, I am.”
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In the following week, there was no trace of Jaehyun in your life. Your friends were kind enough to not mention what Hyuck had witnessed in their kitchen and you thanked them for that. On Monday, after your Spanish class, the ones who walked you back to your dorm were Johnny and Jiwoo.
You didn’t know how to feel. You missed Jaehyun, a lot. He became part of your routine and not getting any messages from him or not being able to see his smile every day was making you frustrated. At the same time, you were scared of what that kiss in his kitchen meant. Was it the end of your friendship?
It was getting annoying, to say the least. Your mind would often replay the scenes you were trying too hard to forget in the most inconvenient moments. On Tuesday, one of the students had to call your attention because you spent two whole minutes staring at their assignment instead of actually correcting it.
Only on Wednesday, your routine changed a little bit. You had woken up late, almost missing your first class. Then, Mr. Choi finished the class ten minutes later than usual, making you sprint towards the main building to get to the study room as fast as you could since Lucas would be already waiting for you.
Once you entered the main hall and one of the employees scolded you for running inside the building, you started to walk fast, just to bump into the person you were expecting to meet. You as you lose balance, the books and your phone, that were on your hands, fall to the ground. Hendery was fast enough to hold you by your shoulder, helping you to stand up properly.
“Whoa, I guess you’re falling for me, uh?!” he says mischievously and you laugh.
“I almost fell because of you, not for you,” you answer and he grins. “I’m sorry, Mr. Choi took longer than expected, so I had to run and-”
“It’s okay,” he adds playfully “but you had to make up for me. For waiting, you know.”
“Oh, of course!” you nod and start guiding Hendery to the study room “I’ll stay as long as you need to-”
“I meant we can have lunch together, if you don’t mind,” Hendery reaches for your left arm, indicating you to face him.
“Oh,” you exclaim, holding the doorknob “Well if you insist, we can have lunch together.”
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Taeyong gets startled when a backpack is thrown beside him, and a tray full of food is placed on the table with unnecessary strength. Johnny and Jiwoo stopped their forks midway, all eyes were focused on Jaehyun’s distressed face.
“What?” he asks, sounding ruder than he intended.
“We should be the one asking you what’s going on,” Johnny says before putting a big slice of watermelon inside his mouth.
“I brought watermelons. Do you want some?” Jiwoo slides one of the bowls in Jaehyun’s direction but he refuses it.
“I’m fine.”
“Who annoyed you?” Taeyong asks, carefully stealing one of Johnny’s watermelons and receiving a glare from the other guy.
“It’s nothing,” he mumbles and starts eating the food that was on his tray.
“Isn’t Y/N eating with us?” Jaehyun hears Johnny asking his girlfriend and starts sulking even more.
Jaehyun was sitting with a group of his classmates in the building’s lounge, discussing the next assignment while they waited for their next class. He smiled when he spotted your small figure walking fast around the building, but immediately frowned when he saw you colliding with a male figure. “Jaehyun, what do you think?” one of his classmates called his attention. “Uh?” he asked without taking his eyes off you. “We can start the project on Monday. What do you think?” The guy repeated but Jaehyun didn’t pay attention, too focused on the way the tall guy held your shoulders. “Whoa, I guess you’re falling for me, uh?!” He heard the guy and rolled his eyes at the cheesy pickup line. “Yeah, yeah, sure,” he answered and kept staring at you. When you were about to turn left and enter the study room, the tall guy quickly held your arm and said something to you, which surprised you, Jaehyun assumed by the expression on your face. "Well, if you insist, we can have lunch together.” Now, it was Jaehyun’s turn to be left surprised as he catches what you said. What really made his blood boil is the way the tall guy flashed you a flirty smile and the way you mirrored it. Once both of you entered the study room, he instantly stood up, but his knee hit the coffee table in front of him and spilled water in one of his friends. “What the hell, Jae?” Naeun exclaims, looking at the boy and then follows his gaze. “Sorry, Naeun.” he looks at his friend and helps her gather her things “I wasn’t paying attention.” “What were you thinking?” another classmate sighs and Jaehyun takes a quick glance at the closed door. “Don’t you guys think we should discuss this project in the study room?” He suggests holding his backpack and motioning to the door you had just entered, only to be ignored by the others.
“I’m not sure, she usually messages me about lunch,” Jiwoo says, checking her phone.
“I guess she will be busy,” Jaehyun says, not looking at the others at the table “With that guy, Hendery.”
“Oh, did you see them again? Why are you always the one coming across them?” Taeyong chuckles and pat the boy’s back.
“That’s why you are so annoyed then.” Jiwoo nudges her boyfriend “Yesterday, she told me she misses you, Jaehyun.”
“Apparently, Jiwoo and I bother her a lot when we walk her back to the dorms,” Johnny completes.
The boy doesn’t lift his head from the food, pretending not to listen. But he did, and it kills him to know it because he feels the same. Jaehyun didn’t reach out and he assumed that it was his fault. In his defense, he just wants to give you some space, some time to forget about what you did in Yuta’s party. He felt bad because he knows about the way you feel about him and he never, in a million years, wanted to use your feelings like that. Saying that he is just your friend just to kiss you and raise your expectations when he wasn’t even sure about his feelings was definitely a terrible idea. He wouldn’t blame you if you never wanted to talk to him again.
“I was kind of a dick,” he mumbles, and Taeyong sighs. “I know she likes me more than just a friend and I didn’t want to give her hopes when I’m not even sure how I feel. I was drunk, that was stupid of me. She must hate me.”
“I’ve heard the drunk excuse once,” Taeyong whispers, and Johnny holds back his laughter.
“Drunk actions are sober thoughts,” Johnny says.
“You have a steamy makeout session with your friends and you say you don’t know how you feel?” Jiwoo asks, using her fork to tap on his tray, calling his attention to her “Yeah, it must be SO hard to figure out how you feel.“ she huffs in annoyance “You are the densest person I know.”
“Y/N is your friend too,” Taeyong adds.
“She is another d, she is dumb,” the girl replies “At least she knows her feelings.”
“Well, sue me for wanting to give her time and space,” Jahyun retorts and before he can resume his lunch, Taeyong grabs the back of his neck.
“Don’t use her feelings as an excuse. We both know you are the one who wants time and space.”
They leave the boy alone, all of them going to their respective classes, but not too long after, he gets a message from Johnny.
[john - 1:46 p.m]: spanish finishes 30 minutes earlier today
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To say you were surprised to see Jaehyun waiting for you outside your classroom was an understatement. At first, you didn’t see him. Then, you thought you were hallucinating. It was only when he smiled and pulled you into a hug that you felt it was real. Your cheeks were burning while he held you way too tight.
“Sorry for not walking you home this week,” he says with his head buried in your hair “I was… busy.”
“It’s fine, you don’t have to walk me home,” you reply, breaking your hug and you almost miss the slightly frustrated expression on his face. Almost.
“But you know I want to.”
You are glad that he decides to not mention that eventful evening. You know that, at some point, it can come back on you and mess your whole relationship, but, right now, all you cared about was Jaehyun’s happy smile while talking to you about the mess Mark made on the club on Saturday and how much fun they had with Sicheng.
Both of you were walking slowly, just appreciating each other’s presence and talking about anything that came to your mind at the moment. Once you arrive at your building, ten minutes later than normal, Jaehyun stops you from entering the building.
“I want to apologize for -”
“It’s okay.” you don’t let him finish. Listening to him apologizing for kissing you it will hurt more than pretending it never happened.
“But you didn’t let me finish,” he insists, but you shake your head.
“I know what you’ll say. It’s alright. I forgive you.”
“Y/N-”
"Jaehyun, don’t,” your voice is stern and he chuckles, raising his arm in defense.
“Alright. Then let me take you to the arcade on Friday after class,” he says, his ears getting red as he does “Remember you said you wanted to go there? Let’s go together. It’s my official apology.”
“I said I forgive you, you don’t need to-”
“This is my official apology, you need to come so I can be officially forgiven,” he smirks and you laugh. He was always so smooth to get what he wanted. “Then we can go to the party.”
“What party?” you frown in confusion.
“Our party, this Friday. You need to come,” you groan in annoyance and let your head fall back “Come on, I’m sure Jiwoo is coming too.”
“She will just spend the whole night with Johnny,” you plead him with your eyes.
“Then you can spend it with me.”
And when Friday came, you realized you can’t say no to Jaehyun.
You had an amazing time at the arcade. Even though you only arrived there around four, because of your classes, Jaehyun made sure to show you his favorite games and you even managed to win him sometimes - he will never admit that though, he will insist that he went easy on you. When it was around seven both of you decided to go back, since, now, he finally convinced you to go to the party.
Despite your protests, Jaehyun walked you back to your dorm and gave you one hour to get ready, saying that you shouldn’t be late. You get to your room with a silly smile on your face and spot Jiwoo starting to apply her makeup, but she doesn’t notice you coming in. You notice a dark red dress resting on her bed. It had an insufficient amount of cloth to cover her body on a chilly night like this, but maybe she wouldn’t need to worry about cold weather inside a house full of people dancing.
“I see that you are ready to kill Johnny tonight,” you say loudly, startling her.
“You do this on purpose, don’t you?” she looks at you and rolls her eyes when she looks at your innocent face “Do you like it?” she points at her dress and you nod, “I think Johnny will like it too.”
“Gross,” you joke and she shows you her tongue
“How was your date?”
“It wasn’t a date.” you start humming the first song that’s in your head “Do you think I will look too ugly wearing this?” you ask by placing one of your blouses in front of you.
“Why? Where are you going?” Jiwoo doesn’t spare you a glance.
“To the party,” you place the blouse back into the drawer and take one of your favorite t-shirts instead, “Jaehyun told me I had one hour to get ready,” you mumble the last part and the other girl stops everything and slowly turns her body to face you.
“You can’t be serious right now!” a grin adorned her face while she looked at you holding an eyelash extension. “You are so in love with each other.”
“No, we are not. We are just friends,” you state matter-of-factly “He just said I should have some fun and ended up convincing me to go to the party.”
“You say as if it’s easy to convince you to go to frat parties,” she turns back to finish her makeup. “If you give me fifteen minutes, I’ll help you get ready.”
“There’s no need for that, don’t worry.”
“Yes, there is. Go take your shower. Go, go.”
You sigh and make your way to the bathroom. If you were fast enough, you could avoid Jiwoo and the makeover you were sure she was planning. Every time you go to an event together, she makes sure to doll you up. Suddenly, flashes from last Saturday cross your mind. You definitely shouldn’t let her choose your outfit again. The last time didn’t go well.
After showering and washing your hair, you see your phone light up and Jaehyun’s face illustrating the screen. You hung up the call to finish drying your hair, but he insisted another five times before starting messaging.
[Jae - 8:14pm]: do u hate me???
[Jae - 8:14pm]: pick up the phone
[Jae - 8:15pm]: y/n
[Jae - 8:15pm]: if u don’t pick up imma be sad
[Jae - 8:15pm]: :/
[Jae - 8:26pm]: are u ignoring me????
[Jae - 8:28pm]: talk to me
[Jae - 8:28pm]: plssss
[Jae - 8:29pm]: i know u r reading my messages
[You - 8:30pm]: omg
[You - 8:30pm]: u are so annoying
[You - 8:31pm]: i was taking a shower
[You - 8:31pm]: do you want me to be dirty????
[You - 8:31pm]: what do u want?
[Jae - 8:32pm]: i forgive you then
[Jae - 8:32pm]: r u ready?
[You - 8:33pm]: almost? i need to hurry up
[You - 8:33pm]: jiwoo must be ready
[You - 8:34pm]: and i’m going with her
[Jae - 8:34pm]: nooo :(
[You - 8:34pm]: ??
[Jae - 8:35pm]: i’m waiting for you outside
[Jae - 8:35pm]: walk with me instead
You stare at your screen for some seconds before thinking of a reply. Why did Jaehyun come all the way to your dorm to pick you up? Is he insane? Is he trying purposefully making you fall for him just to crush your heart later? Is that the reason why he gave you one hour to get ready? He barely waited thirty minutes, though.
[You - 8:36pm]: ok..
[You - 8:36pm]: i’ll be down in 5
You run back to your room and throw everything on your bed, not caring about the mess. Jiwoo is finishing her hair and was almost ready to put on her shoes. You throw the wet towel that was in your hair on the floor and take the first pair of shoes you find.
“If you are rushing just to avoid me, forget it. You’ll only leave this room once you look presentable to a party. Look at you!” she scoffs but you barely listen to her
“No, not now. I need to go,” you pant and grab the first lipstick you found “Jaehyun’s downstairs.”
“HE WHAT?” she shouts and screams incoherent words afterward. You were sure the whole floor had heard her. “YOU CAN’T MEET HIM LOOKING LIKE A WET DOG. YOU HAVEN’T EVEN DRIED YOUR HAIR PROPERLY!”
“Stop screaming!!” you plead and try to find a hairbrush “It will dry naturally.”
“NATURALLY?” Abigail punches the wall behind Jiwoo but she doesn’t seem to notice or care about it “Come on, if you don’t want to change your outfit, at least let me dry your hair.”
“He has been waiting outside for a while now.”
“It won’t kill him to wait another fifteen minutes.” she grabs the hairdryer and goes to your direction, but you deflect “It’s either the hair or the outfit. You will have to change SOMETHING.”
You know how stubborn your friend can be, so you just drop the matter without fighting and let her do her thing. While you use the hairdryer, she chooses something from your drawers, while threatening to lock you out of your shared room if you don’t wear her outfit.
You regret not running away while you could when she hands you the same black skinny jeans from last time. You should have burned it last week. She chooses a crop top that was probably hers and throws your favorite denim jacket at you.
“Just so you won’t complain about being cold.”
You rush to get to the front of the building as fast as possible, just to find Jaehyun leaning his back against the lamppost. You can’t deny your heart skipped a beat at the sight. He is there, waiting for you. His head is hung low, eyes fixed on his phone. Jaehyun had the same outfit from the first time you met him at your first frat party: long-sleeved black shirt and black skinny jeans, looking just as good as the first time.
“Sorry, I’m late. It’s Jiwoo’s fault,” you say once you’re next to him.
His eyes scan your body up and down and you see a faint smirk on his face. “I like your jeans,” he adds suggestively.
“I hope I won’t feel cold, Jiwoo chose this crop top to wear at night!” you say to yourself, not realizing what the boy has just implied. Jaehyun was behind you, still checking you out, which if you had noticed, would have made you blush “You gave me an hour to get ready, though. I barely had time to dry my hair, it will look ugly later.”
“I doubt it,” he answers back and rushes to hold your hand in his. “Sorry, I guess I just wanted to see you soon.” He notices how you tense up and smiles at the way you tighter your grip around his hands.
“Stop it.” you warn him “You didn’t have to pick me up though, I could go with Jiwoo.”
“I came to pick you up because I heard creeps are hovering around the girl’s dorm.”
“Who told you that?” you ask, adjusting your hands together. Holding Jaehyun’s hand was more pleasing than you wanted to admit. It felt familiar.
“Johnny.” you laugh at him who looks at you confused “What?”
“Do you seriously believe in Johnny? There’s 24/7 security around our building,” you smile at him who mirrors your expression, showing you his dimples. “He just uses it as an excuse to always give Jiwoo a ride,”
“Well, I guess he just worries about his girlfriend,” the boy gives your hand a little squeeze, making you look at him “Tell me when you’ll leave the party so I can walk you back, okay?”
“You don’t need to,” you turn your head to the front. If you keep staring at Jaehyun while he is being so caring, you’ll collapse there and then.
“I want to, silly. It’s dangerous to walk around by yourself at night.”
“So I assume you will fight whoever tries to hurt me?” you ask humorously, a smile on your face.
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Jaehyun tried to stay with you the whole night, but his friends weren’t helping. It all started as soon as you got to the house and Taeyong asked him to carry heavy boxes inside and stole your attention away from the boy. When he finally found you again, you were in a circle with Donghyuck, Taeyong, Taeil, and some girls he didn’t recognize, drinking some weird mixture they made. Before he could reach you, though, Yuta forced him to pair up in a beer pong game.
What he hated the most, though, was when he spotted you in the crowd for the third time that night. You were already tipsy, more prone to smile, and your smile was simply breathtaking to Jaehyun. But you weren’t smiling for him. It was Hendery Wong who was making you laugh and it was the other boy’s arm you were holding to steady yourself in place. Jaehyun hated, even more, all the times the boy would lean his body to whisper something to you and how he took advantage of that position to hold you by the waist, his hand resting on your lower back, bringing your bodies closer. Too close to Jaehyun’s liking.
“Stop staring, hyung,” Donghyuck says propping himself up against the kitchen’s counter. “Or else I will think you’re jealous.”
“I’m not jealous and I’m not staring.” Jaehyun sips his beer without taking his eyes off the couple.
“Yeah, why would you feel jealous of a funny and hot guy who is clearly hitting on Y/N?” Donghyuck says sarcastically and steals the drink from Jaehyun.
“He is shamelessly flirting with her for ages,” The boy tears his gaze apart from the couple to look at the younger who was drinking his beer. “Do you believe he used the ‘I think you are falling for me’ pick up line with her? And then inviting her to have lunch with him when she usually eats with me- us?”
“Who are we talking about?” Yuta arrives with two shot glasses in hand, filled with blue liquid.
“Take a wild guess.” Donghyuck rolls his eyes and goes to the dance floor.
“Do you want it?” the older boy offers and Jaehyun gladly takes it, feeling his throat burning with the alcohol. “What’s going on?”
“Hendery Wong.” the younger says looking back to the tall guy touching your body the way he wanted to.
Yuta follows Jaehyun’s eyes and hisses at the sight “I don’t wanna get punched in the face  but” he whistles and looks back at his friend “I don’t blame the kid, she looks hot as fuck tonight.”
“If you don’t wanna get punched, then close this filthy mouth of yours.” Jaehyun’s expression darkens and Yuta only laughs, tapping the guy on the shoulder.
Jaehyun considered approaching you. Fuck him, every time he saw Hendery touching your hair or smiling at you, he wanted to go there and punch that sly smirk out of the boy’s face. What would be his excuse, though? He didn’t know why he suddenly felt so protective around you, but it was eating him up.
“How’s tonight going, Jeffrey?” a cheerful Johnny appeared beside him “You looked so happy playing beer pong with Yuta.”
“Can’t you see I’m having the time of my life,” the younger one says sarcastically and takes the bottle of beer from Johnny’s hand.
“Your face says otherwise,” the tall one chuckles and glances towards you. “Just go there and ask her to dance.”
“She already has a date.” Johnny smiles and waves at someone “I don’t want to bother them.”
“It’s surprising they haven’t caught you staring yet. Jiwoo and I have been watching you and your jealousy attack for more than fifteen minutes.” He shakes hands with two guys who were passing by and complimented his music playlist for the party. “She likes you, you know? I’m sure she would dump anyone if you asked.”
“Why would I ask her that?” Jaehyun sounds offended. He didn’t want you to dump anyone for him. “She’s just a friend. A good friend. That’s why I want the best for her.”
“And I assume that, in your judgment, Hendery is not the best for her,” Johnny sips his drink and nudges his friend “but you are, aren’t you?”
“Hendery is not the best for her and everyone knows it. He is an exchange student, they start dating and what happens when he needs to move back to China?" Jaehyun crosses his arms in front of his chest, visibly irritated. “I just don’t want her to get hurt.”
“Oh, Jaehyun, please,” the older boy rests his arm on Jaehyun’s shoulder and leans closer to the boy’s ear “Just admit that you like her.”
“I don’t like her like that.”
“Yeah, right, so I guess now you call steamy makeout sessions, friendly conversations.”
“Can you not mention that? I was drunk.” Jaehyun snaps and slaps Johnny’s arm away from him “I only like her as a friend. Stop annoying the shit out of me. You, Donghyuck, Yuta, even Taeyong was bugging me this week. Cut the dating bullshit, for fucks sake!”
“Yeah, you take her on dates, make out with her in our kitchen, and now is jealous of Hendery blatantly flirting with her because you are just friends.” Johnny finishes his drink before placing the empty bottle on the counter “you definitely don’t like her.”
It was probably the alcohol, but Jaehyun was mad. He was so mad that he stormed out of the kitchen before he started a fight with Johnny. Why was everyone pressuring him about jealousy? He was only trying to take care of you. He knew about your little crush on him and that’s why he made sure to tell everyone that you were only friends. And friends care about each other.
He sighs and sits on the sidewalk, away from the party and from the stares. Away from you and Hendery. What was happening to him? He lays his back on the grass and closes his eyes. His mind reminds him of the way you looked so concentrated while watching the boring movie the first time you went out together. You looked so cute, biting your lips and barely blinking. He remembered the way you sang your heart out to all the High School Musical songs and how much he loves making you laugh, just to see your smile. He remembered all the times you tensed up when he held your hands, but after seconds were adjusting yourself. His heart starts beating faster when the image of you sleeping on his bed appears on his mind. The way you were peacefully sleeping beside him and how all he wanted to was hold you and never let go. His skin seems to burn with the memory of the feeling of your fingers tracing his skin, your lips on his and the way you ground against his body last Saturday.
“Fuck,” he mouths.
Lastly, he remembered how unbelievably pretty you look tonight. Damn, Yuta was right, you were hot. You look absolutely stunning and he wants you badly. He sighed thinking about how all of his friends know him so well. How could he keep lying to himself like that? Saying that he isn’t jealous when all he is thinking about is how great it must feel to be in Hendery’s shoes right now.
“What are you doing here?” he doesn’t need to open his eyes to know who it was.
“I’m tired.”
“Then go to your room. This is literally your house!” you hold his hand and try to force him to stand up “Come on, Jae.”
“I’m fine. Just go back inside. Enjoy the party.” he stays in the same position, eyes completely closed.
You huff in annoyance at his behavior. How dare him, tell you to enjoy the party when you only came because he asked you to.
“If you’re not standing up, then I’m leaving,” you threaten, but the boy doesn’t move. Why was he being like that? “Fine then. Once you decide to tell me what’s wrong, text me. Goodnight, Jae.”
You say, walking away from the boy laying on the grass. Five minutes ago Jiwoo came to you and told you to talk to Jaehyun, he looked stressed. Why was he stressed when he was supposed to have fun? You thought to yourself. But you had to admit you were more relieved than sad for not having the opportunity to spend the night with Jaehyun. After what happened the last time both of you drank a little too much, you decided it was risky to be too close to him and alcohol.
You couldn’t stop thinking about his actions, though. Movie dates, the way he always looked after you, he even remembered how much you wanted to go to an arcade and took you there. Your heart was confused. Could it be more than friendship? You cherished Jaehyun beyond anything you could explain, you didn’t want to ruin things with him.
You might have started your relationship weirdly. Looking back to the day you woke up beside him after a party, it felt like years ago. Because that’s exactly how Jaehyun makes you feel like you’ve known him for years. The more you got to know him, the more he seemed to grow on you. He was sweet, caring, and an absolute dork. He never failed to make you laugh and was always ready to listen to what you had to say, either if it was a joke or if you were just complaining about something. He would let you use his expensive pens just because you were curious about how they were. He listened to your messy playlist even though he absolutely hated 70% of the songs you put there. He is interested in you as a person. He makes you feel special and you can’t express how much you are happy to be by his side.
“Y/N, I told you that I would walk you home!” he shouts from behind you. “Wait for me.”
You hate how he could make your heart beat faster just by calling your name
“I thought you wanted to be alone.” you shrug and slow down your pace.
“Why are you walking so slowly?” he grabs your hand and pulls you forward “Just because I’m walking you it doesn’t mean I’m not afraid of someone attacking us at 1 in the morning.” you laugh at his sentence and he can’t fight back the smile that appears on his face.
“What happened to the guy who said he would protect me?” you question him, poking his ribs.
“I’ll only fight people unless it’s completely necessary. I don’t know if you realized, but I prefer to avoid confrontation.” his thumb starts caressing the back of your hand and you feel butterflies flying on your stomach.
“I like this way,” you softly say “I wouldn’t want to see you hurting.”
“Stop saying things like that, it makes me wanna kiss you,” he mumbles.
It makes me wanna kiss you.
Did you hear it correctly? Was he jokingly flirting with you or did he mean that? You didn’t have the guts to ask. The rest of the walk was silent, the only noise coming from your rhythmic steps on the concrete. Once you see the back of your building, informing you you are close to your destination, you try to take your hands away from Jaehyun’s grasp, but he only holds it tighter.
“No,” he pleaded quietly “not yet.”
You hum in response and keep walking beside him, holding his hand.
“Text me when you get home,” you say to him once you are in front of your building. You wait for him to leave so you can get inside, but he doesn’t move. “Are you not going home? Do you need anything?”
“I do.”
“What is it?”
“Can you hug me?”
Your breath is caught on your throat at his sudden request. What was wrong with Jaehyun tonight? You didn’t know he became clingy when he drank. Either way, you comply with his request and circle your arms around his waist and place your head on his chest. Jaehyun was warmer than remembered. You hear his heartbeat increase and smile softly. Was he as nervous as you were?
“Don’t date Hendery,” he blurts out and you frown, not understanding where this came from.
“Why would I-”
“I was so fucking pissed at the way he looked at you and it killed me that I don’t have the right to complain about it because we are just friends,” he says in one breath and you try to get away from his hold to have a look at his face, but he holds you closer “The way he touched you got me frustrated to the point that I had to go outside or I would have picked up a fight.”
“He was just being-”
“I swear to god, if you say friendly, I’ll kill myself,” he says pushing you away from him and you can see him scowling at you.
“He was being too friendly,” you say smiling mischievously and Jaehyun scoffs.
“Weren’t you uncomfortable with the way he was holding you?” he asked in disbelief.
“To be honest, I think you are exaggerating. I was really tipsy, he was just making sure I wouldn’t fall.” you say and Jaehyun rolls his eyes “What? He was basically just hugging me. We hug all the time.”
“You two hug all the time?” he almost screams and you put your hand on his lips.
“Shhh don’t scream!” you say, moving your hand from his lips to his shoulder. “I meant us. You and me. You hug me all the time too.”
“But I’m your friend and he is your student, who is clearly hitting on you, by the way,” he says placing his hands on your hips, but you don’t seem to realize.
“What, Jaehyun, is this jealousy?” you smile as the words leave your lips as a joke
“Yes, this is fucking jealousy.” he snaps for the second time tonight “I am fucking jealous because that kid has been hitting on you since you first started tutoring him and you don’t realize that.”
“Woah, hold on! Stop saying nonsense.”
“You are so frustrating,” he mumbles and brings you closer by circling his arms around your waist. “Please don’t date Hendery.”
“I won’t date any-”
"Date me instead."
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You feel someone sliding their hand into the back pocket of your jeans and smirk.
“Stop that,” you nudge his side “frat boy.”
“Why do you keep pretending you don’t like it when I do this?” Jaehyun rolls his eyes and brings you closer to his side “Lunch at 1?”
“It’s good for me.” you nod and stay on your toes to reach for his cheeks. “Shouldn’t you be in class right now?”
“It got canceled,” he says taking his hand out of your pocket and placing it on your waist. “Let me carry those for you.”
“It’s fine, we’re almost there.”
“Let me be a good boyfriend and carry your stuff for you.” he takes the books out of your hands and kisses your temple.
You have been dating for a while now, but every time he reminds you he is your boyfriend, it never fails to make your heart flutter. You smile widely, poking the dimples on his face and Jaehyun pretends to be annoyed, when, in fact, he loved how happy you looked.
Once you arrived at the main building, you thought Jaehyun would leave you by yourself, but he made sure to escort you to the study room. Once you turn down the hall, your boyfriend spots a certain someone waiting for you outside. Jaehyun stops a few meters away and hands you your books back, but before you can thank him, he pulls you by your belt loops and crashes his lips on yours.
You get surprised at his sudden action but kisses him for a little while after pushing him with your books, whining about being in public. Jaehyun finishes by giving pecks on your neck, jaw, and cheek. Before you can ask why he did that, you spot the long haired Chinese boy in front of library's the study room. He is clearly avoiding looking at your direction. You hit your boyfriend’s arm with the books on your hands.
“I can’t believe you were putting on a show with Hendery standing right there. You are so childish.”
“Yet, you love me the same,” he snickers, giving you one last peck on the lips “I just want to make sure he knows you’re taken.”
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too-much-tma-stuff · 10 months
Text
No Body to Bury
This is a full dead spin off of another one shot I read about Danny being given flowers for his grave by a child.
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The Justice League had been working with Phantom for a while now, not consistently, but he showed up when they were dealing with something ~spooky~, and he’d given them a way to contact him. They called him in to consult, or to back them up sometimes because he was a bit of a power-house. At first they had thought the name was part of his shtick, after all his powers were ghostly enough and there was something satisfying about having a theme.
They had started to suspect something when the child citizen had given him flowers for his grave, and his delighted reaction. It could have just been a kid happy to get a gift, but it wasn’t, it was clearly more then that and Batman had had a flashback to one of Constantine’s crash course lesson’s on supernatural, the one on ghosts. Graves were very important to them, as were morning gifts like flowers and candles, whatever was culturally appropriate.
None of them knew where Phantom’s grave was, Batman had tried to find it, to find anything about the ghosts life and death, but there wasn’t much. Not before he became a hero in Amity park, so he could maybe guess that the other had died in Amity (if he had died), but there was no deaths that matched up with his appearance. The closest thing was a boy named Danny but he had gone missing years after Phantom showed up, and he’d never been declared dead officially. More was impossible to find, even after the GIW had been disbanded the information they had destroyed about the town couldn’t all be retrieved.
Since Batman didn’t know where Phantom’s grave was he couldn’t leave flowers on it directly which meant he had to actually give them to the ghost boy. It was a bit uncomfortable the first few times, and his kids made fun of him for being emotionally repressed but… it made Phantom so happy, and brought him closer and closer to Batman. He had already started to see Phantom as one of his kids, even if he knew he’d never get the ghost to come back to the manor. The gifts helped, he found that Phantom also liked to receive food, he even picked at it sometimes even though it seemed he didn’t need to eat. Sharing meals with him was a good excuse to actually talk some though, Batman would listen and eat his own food as Phantom picked at his and rambled about space, about recent fights he’d been in, and people he’d met.
Through all that Batman managed to learn more about the young hero, about what he valued, and what he did when he wasn’t being a hero. Apparently he spent a lot of time off world but exploring rather then being a hero to the galaxy. Batman had a feeling superman would be upset by that, that Phantom could be doing more good then he was and was choosing not to. But the ghost was clearly still a kid, or at least had been when he died, and he was plenty heroic, he didn’t need to be dealing with universal threats at maximum sixteen years old, Batman felt bad calling him in for the planetary threats, but sometimes it was unavoidable.
As they got closer Phantom started to let other things slip, that he’d had a sister, and a couple of close friends that he still watched over when he could. When Batman had asked if those people knew he was dead Phantom had fallen silent for a full minute and then changed the subject entirely, Batman hadn’t pushed it that time. If he had Phantom would have retreated, but as it was they kept having lunch together, and the boy let more and more slip. Including more stories about those friend he must have had while he was alive, it was during one of those that he let his name slip.
“So my sister said to me, ‘Danny you should-‘” his mind seemed to catch up with his mouth and he froze, Batman was still too but when Phantom started to fade from view he spoke up.
“Phantom, wait, why don’t we leave the tower and go somewhere private. We can talk secret identities, I’ll tell you mine too,” Batman promised, he thought it was the best way to make Danny feel better, besides he did trust Phantom.
Danny hesitated before fading back into full visibility and nodding, “Alright,” He agreed, looking very young and vulnerable. “Do you mind if I fly us down to earth? I’ll keep you safe from space,” He asked and Batman nodded, letting Danny grab his arms and phase them through the building and out. Danny flue quickly back down to the earth, the side facing away from the sun so it was the middle of the night, putting Batman down in the middle of an abandoned park, landing as well and going to sit on the swing set.
Batman followed, sitting down next to the young hero and trying hard not to think about Ace, another talented and powerful person who went through to much and died to young. Once he was sat down Bruce sighed and took off his cowl, showing his face to the other young hero. “I’m Bruce Wayne,” He said with a wry smile when he saw familiar recognition cross over Danny’s face.
“No way, that makes so much sense,” Danny cackled, which wasn’t the reaction Bruce was expecting. He’d ask about that later, instead he just gestured for Danny to introduce himself next.
“Danny Fenton,” the kid introduced, holding out his hand with an impish little smile. Bruce chuckled and shook it as if this was the first time they’d met instead of having known each other for nearly a year.
“I know that name,” Bruce hummed thoughtfully, back peddling a little when Danny tensed. “Sorry, worlds greatest detective and all, I did a bit of research on Amity Park when you joined us to see if I could track you down. I had ruled that out because your civilian identity didn’t go missing for two years until after you showed up as Phantom. Does that mean you’re not, well, dead?” He asked, rubbing the back of his neck at the awkward question.
“Oh, no, I’m very dead,” Danny said with a bitter chuckle, pushing himself to rock on the swing a little. “But I didn’t die for a couple of years after I got my powers, not fully. I don’t think most people understand what it’s like to die twice,” He said, looking down, already pale hands going white around the knuckles with how tight he was holding the chains.
“You don’t have to talk about it,” Batman said softly, leaning forward and bracing his elbows on his knees. “But if you want to talk, I’ll listen, and I won’t break your confidence,” Bruce assured, they sat quietly for a few more minutes before Danny sighed and looked away.
“My parents were.. well probably best classed as mad-scientists. I loved them and they loved me but they were obsessed with ghosts and with discovery, it was always a tossup which was more important. I would join them in their lab to get their attention, and it was often my job to clean up after them. I ended up being micro-dosed on this stuff they called ectoplasm a lot which probably helped when the accident happened. My parents were trying to build a portal to the ‘ghost-zone’, what Constantine calls the infinite realms. It didn’t work at first, not till I stepped inside it, then it opened and it electrocuted me at the same time as flooding me with that weird glowing green ooze. It killed me and resurrected me simultaneously but not properly.
“Instead of actually bringing me back to life it bound my ghost back to my own body so I became the ghost possessing myself. That’s when I started working as a hero, while I was still partially alive.” He paused, swinging for a moment while Bruce stayed quiet and still, trying not to think about what Danny’s homelife must have been life, or how much it must have hurt to be killed like that.
“After a while the GIW showed up, they tried to catch me, but my parents had been trying to catch or destroy me as phantom for years. The GIW weren’t nearly as competent as the Red Huntress, so I avoided and ignored them. But I started to take it for granted and dismiss them, I didn’t pay enough attention, and they finally got the drop on me. I don’t want to talk about everything they did to me, but it was bad, and it was to much for my human half,” Danny stopped again and bit his lip, there was a hitch in his breathing that told Bruce exactly why Danny was hiding his eyes.
“Danny died, but it turned out that being half human was sort of holding back what I was capable of as a ghost,” He snickered with a little bit of bitter, vicious glee. “They couldn’t hold me anymore, all their little devices got left on my corpse when they forced me out and I destroyed the lab. After that I just… couldn’t go back to my life, it’s not natural. I died, they need to grieve me. That’s- that’s how it works.”
“And did they? Did you… get a burial?” Bruce asked, because he hadn’t seen anything about it in the news. His fear was confirmed when Danny took a deep breath and shook his head.
“No, I didn’t leave my body in the wreckage. I was worried… scratch that, I knew my parents would cremate me to try and keep me from coming back as a ghost, because they didn’t know I already was one. And that would weaken my connection to this world. I need to protect people, it’s half my purpose, I need a connection to this world.”
“Where did you hide it?” Batman asked, his breath catching when he saw Danny’s eyes flash a dangerous red.
“Why do you want to know?” He growled, bearing teeth that were sharper then they usually were. “You gonna give it back to my family for ~closure~? Destroy it yourself to curtail my power? I know Constantine is scared of me, he’d like that.”
Bruce immediately held his hands up in a placating gesture, of course Danny would be protective of his body. “No nothing like that Danny, I promise,” He said quickly. “But I just remember from what I’ve been told about ghosts, having a grave is important and, if you wanted, I would like to see you get a proper burial. It’s your body, you should get to control what happens to it but if you wanted a grave, a funeral, we have a protected graveyard for fallen heros. You’d fit right in,” He said with a uncertain smile.
Danny relaxed slowly, his eyes going back to green and his expression turning contemplative, looking back down as he thought about the offer. “Maybe… maybe,” He murmured. “It would be nice to have a grave, I’ve been leaving the flowers near my body in the ghost zone but… it would be nice to have a grave. I can feel the longing, the instinct. It feels bad to not have… have that, have something.
“But… I am scared. Would you be willing to- if you do an empty coffin funeral and burial for me, I’ll put my body in it, once the coffin is in the protected ground I can phase my body into it?” He asked, looking up at Batman worriedly and it was so obvious Danny was just a kid, a neglected boy who had been unlucky enough to die violently twice.
“Of course Danny, however you feel most comfortable,” Batman assured. Watching as Danny took a deep breath, more out of habit then anything, then nodded firmly.
“Then, I would like that. I know I am still here in a way so it feels weird having a funeral for me but, I still died, and I’d like to be remembered.” He murmured uncertainly.
“Of course, I understand. We didn’t get rid of my son’s grave when he came back because he still died. Being brought back, in any way, doesn’t really undo that,” Bruce sympathized, finally getting a small smile from Danny.
“Thank you Bruce, you’re a good guy. Now… do you need a lift back to the watchtower?”
“Yes please,” Bruce agreed with a sigh, finally standing up and pulling his hood back on. He had a funeral to plan.
"When we do have the funeral, can you ask your son to come? I'd like to meet him," Danny asked and Batman hummed, not sure how to explain the complicated relationship he had with Jason now.
"I'll try," He agreed, that was the best he could do really.
Part 2: here
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moonstruckme · 3 months
Note
hiii!! i love your writing so much i think i’ve read every single thing you’ve ever posted. i’m genuinely obsessed 🫶🫶 i was wondering if you could write something where the reader and remus have been dating/talking for a little while and she hasn’t had her first kiss yet and she starts to get nervous everytime she thinks he’s abt to kiss her and she runs away?? i’m ngl this is based off of very real events in my life 😭😭
i love you so much!! hope your doing amazing
Hi gorgeous, thanks so much! This is soooo relatable of you haha, I have a library of hilarious stories about my very hyper friend who kept literally springing away from guys she liked who were trying to kiss her, but it does make for some very interesting (and often very sweet) conversations!
Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
On your first official date with Remus, the two of you went to a drive-in movie. You kept your seatbelt on the entire time. 
You only realized halfway through, mentally kicking yourself for being so jittery you’d lost all sense of normalcy, but by then it felt too late. It’d be awkward to take it off halfway through the movie, try to play that off as casual. You’d made your bed. You didn’t unbuckle until Remus dropped you off at your house at the end of the night. 
On your second date, you’re determined to be less uptight. You want him to know that you really do like him, even if your nerves make you jump and flinch whenever he gets close. At the Italian restaurant, it’s difficult to find a pasta dish without garlic, but you manage it. You’re a girl with an agenda. The two of you split a chocolate cake for dessert. It’s delicious, probably, though you can’t focus on much besides Remus’ story and the way his mouth moves as he tells it. How he tucks one corner of his bottom lip between his teeth when he’s trying to hide a smile. 
You have to hope belatedly that you haven’t somehow smeared chocolate all over your face while eating. You’re not at all confident you would’ve noticed. 
It’s a short walk back to your place, and you manage to jabber the whole way, a masterclass in self-sabotage. Remus doesn’t seem to mind, his hand light and cordial on your back as he guides you up the steps to your door. You savor the touch. It takes every ounce of willpower you have not to spring away. 
“It sounds really interesting,” he says graciously as you finish your tangent about the book you’ve just read. “I’ll have to pick up a copy.” 
“I can lend you mine,” you offer. “Maybe I can bring it the next time we hang out?” Your voice tips up hopefully at the end of the question, and warmth touches your cheeks. 
A similar pinkening spreads across Remus’ freckles. He smiles at you, the scar across his lip stretching. You’re spellbound. 
“Yeah, that sounds great.” You might be imagining it, but you could swear his eyes flit to your lips. “I had a great time tonight,” he says. “I really like talking to you.” 
Your voice is soft. “I like talking to you, too.” 
He takes a step towards you, and it’s like your muscles stage a coup. You take an involuntary step backward, a smile plastering itself uncomfortably on your face. 
“Thanks for everything,” you say brightly. “Goodnight!”
You spin and go for the door handle, and you’re nearly inside before you hear Remus’ quiet “Wait.” 
You turn. Lead in your bones. 
Remus is holding his palms up as if to show you he’s got no weapon. 
“Sorry,” he says, “I just wanted to…you know I’d never do anything you didn’t want me to, right?” 
You’re frozen stiff. 
“Like, even if I thought there was a chance you didn’t want to, I would never…” He shakes his head, looking lost. Guilt settles like a stone in your gut. “I guess I’m a bit confused. If you don’t want to do anything, that’s completely fine, but sometimes it seems like you want me to kiss you, and then you don’t…” 
“Rem,” you say. You feel like you’re breathing through a straw. “Remus, I’m so sorry.” 
“Don’t be sorry, sweetheart, it’s not your fault—” 
“No, it is. It’s not—I don’t want you to think I’m scared of you or anything. I’m not, it’s just, I get skittish.” You can’t make yourself look at his eyes, your gaze stuck just shy of his chin. Your face feels aflame. “It’s not you. I’m just nervous.” 
“Oh.” It’s a soft thing, more exhale than anything. Then his fingers curl under your chin, tipping your face up. “Well, you can relax, love. I was never going to make a move unless I got a clear signal from you first. But we can just take that off the table completely, if you’d like.” He gives you a small, gentle smile. “I only want you to feel comfortable.” 
Your heart zings right up into your throat. “I do feel comfortable,” you blurt. “I don’t want it off the table.” 
Remus’ eyebrows flick upwards. “You don’t?” 
“No,” you murmur, bashful. 
His eyebrows come slowly back down, puckering slightly as he tries to figure you out. His eyes narrow until his lashes kiss. His tongue pokes into his cheek, just a little. You miss nothing. You find yourself taking in a quiet breath, steeling yourself. 
You move across that tiny bit of air between you and find him there waiting.
It’s everything you could’ve hoped for and yet startlingly simple. Remus’ lips are warm and soft, pressing into yours with an intensity that you suspect is nonetheless restrained for your benefit. He tastes like chocolate cake. 
His mouth meanders over to the corner of your lips, granting one quick peck to your cheek before making its way back to the center of your mouth, reverent. He backs away slowly, easing you out of it. 
“Wasn’t really expecting that,” he admits.
“Me neither. Was it alright?” Your voice is a bit breathy. “I’ve never done that before.” 
For a moment, he’s quiet. 
“That was your first kiss?” 
You swallow, rubbing your lips together as you nod. 
“Sweetheart,” he grins, “you’re a natural.” 
A giggle spurts out of you, dizzy with the taste of him and the novelty of it all. “You mean it?” 
“I wouldn’t lie to you.” He mimes drawing a cross over his heart. It occurs to you that you both seem infinitely more at ease than you have since dinner. The corner of Remus’ bottom lip goes between his teeth, his cheek dimpling. “I mean, there is something to be said for practice, though.” 
You don’t fight your own grin; it comes out in full force. “Mm, I think I’ve heard something about that. Practice makes…defective, right? Something like that.” 
“C’mere.” Remus rolls his eyes at you, but as his arms wrap around you his smile mirrors yours. 
541 notes · View notes
clockwayswrites · 5 months
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A Broken Sort of Normal- Part 19
WC: 2134, Masterpost
Danny sit up straighter in his chair as he states his name, but Wally can see the wince that Danny tries to hide. Absently, Wally runs through Danny’s schedule of care and when the other will be able to have more pain medication.
“Were you born with powers?” Bruce continues.
“No.”
Wally wants to go to Danny. He wants to tell him that it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter that Danny has powers. It doesn’t mater how he got them. It doesn’t matter that Wally didn’t know. None of it matters to Wally; he’s just glad that Danny is still here.
“Are you comfortable explaining how did you got your powers?”
Danny runs his hand through his hair. He’s nervous. “Some of it. The broad strokes. It was a lab accident, because of course there was. My parents are ecto scientists, they study ghosts. They’re not… let’s just say don’t read their research into ghostly behavior. They are brilliant engineers though. They managed to build a portal to the Infinite Realms—”
“Minging knobheads,” John curses quietly.
“—and I was sorta in the portal when it turned on. Which, um, killed me and revived me at the same time. I was electrocuted while my system was flooded with ectoplasm.”
Killed.
Danny had— Danny had died. Again, before, Danny had died. Wally closed his eyes and swallowed around the catch in his throat. He almost never got the chance to know Danny. A hand fit into his and Wally knows instantly that it’s Dick’s. He grips it back tightly. At least he isn’t listening to this alone.
“It’s not so much that I got powers, as that because I’m half dead, I’m half ghost and I can do the things that ghosts can do. Invisibility, intangibility, flight… things like that. Long story short, someone had to stop the ghosts that the portal let through—”
John is up and pacing now. Zatanna doesn’t even try to stop him.
“—so I sort of became the town hero. I went by Phantom. It was… well, you’ve all been there.”
God, Wally wishes Danny didn’t know how that was.
“Kid… did you even have anyone to help you?” Barry asks.
Danny shrugs. “Two friends and eventually Ja… my older sister.. There are a few ghosts that were sometimes allies but ghosts…”
“Ghosts aren’t good or evil, they’ve got obsessions,” John explains into the silence. “Sometimes those obsessions motivate the ghosts in a way that seems one way or another. It only works out for you as long as your needs aligns with their obsession.”
Wally’s mind spins.
“Danny,” Bruce asks with very careful words, “do you have an obsession?”
He searches back through his memories of Danny.
“Yes.”
It couldn’t be anything anyone would see as bad or dangerous.
“Protection. My obsession is protection. It’s not as compelling to me as it is for a full ghost. For me it’s more like a hunger craving or itch, but it is there. It’s a good part of why I became a paramedic.”
Oh. That made so much sense.
“That’s our Danny,” Danna says, softly, from in their group.
“Why did you not simply join us as a hero?” Diana asks.
“Before, well, things were… complicated? There’s this government agency that considers ghosts non-sentient and—”
Danny jerks back in his chair at all the exclamations that rang out in the room at that. It isn’t just a reaction to the sudden noise, Wally realizes, Danny looks startled at being defended.
It breaks Wally’s heart.
“It’s okay!” Danny says over the din. “They were always pretty incompetent, really, even when working with my parents. I never even ended up vivisected or anything!”
Gar clamps a hand over his mouth and mutters. “I think I’m going to be sick.”
“Danny,” Dianna says his name gently, “have your parents ever attacked you?”
“They don’t know I’m a halfa. They don’t know I’m Phantom,” Danny says. There’s a pleading note to his voice that makes Wally agree with Gar; he’s going to be sick.
“But they’ve attacked Phantom,” Dianna says. It’s not a question, but Danny nods anyways. “Danny, do we need to set up protection for you from your parents?”
“They don’t know—”
“Kid,” Barry interrupts, “what you did was on the news. Like, every news station across the world. I think they know now.”
Danny sits back in his chair. He picks at the already frayed edge of the hoodie. Suddenly he looks small in a way that Wally’s only seen when Danny’s been in the middle of a panic attack. Any strength Danny’s gathered the last few days seems to leave him as his shoulders slump. “Maybe. I guess… I don’t know how they’ll take the news. It’s… maybe. We’ll, um, more than that someone needs to make sure the portal stays closed down. If the ghosts start coming through again…”
The hand Danny presses against his chest shakes. “I’m not as strong as I used to be. I don’t know if my powers will come back still or if this… is what I am now, but my core is weaker than it used to be. If this the way I’ll be now, I won’t be able to fight them off.”
“Are they dangerous?” Bruce asks. “Beyond the morality of their obsession, are they actively dangerous to you?”
“That’s not an easy question. Mostly the ghosts used Amity Park as a new way to fulfill their obsessions. Lunch Lady wants to feed people, which is good, but if you don’t want to eat things can get nasty. Obsessions are like that, they can twist quickly. The ghosts also just like to brawl, a lot of them at least. Some of them would understand if I can’t and back off, but there are others… take Skulker,” Danny says with a wave of his hand, “his obsession is hunting rare game and, well, I’m rare game. He wants to mount my pelt to his wall.”
With an unpleasant noise, Gar dashes from the room. It makes Danny wince and mumble an apology.
Wally is already mentally calling favors to call in to safeguard their apartment, not that he thinks anyone will say no to protecting Danny.
“We’ll make checking on the portal a priority as soon as this meeting is done,” Bruce assures Danny.
“Thank you. I don’t want anyone to be hurt if it gets turned back on.”
“Why has it been off? If it’s off, why would they turn it back on now?” John asks, still pacing.
Danny looks away from the table again. “Because they remember now.”
“The curse?” John asks at the same time Bary asks, “What do you mean remember?”
“I mean they forgot, because, yeah, the curse,” Danny says. He’s back to picking at his sleeve. Everyone gives him time to try and find his words, which he does with a wet laugh. “I was stupid. I mean, I was young, but I still should have known better. I was just… I was having a hard time. My parents were working on a new GIW contract and my friends… team were going off to college… I was going to be alone to deal with the ghosts. I still should have known better. I just wished I could be normal.”
“That’s not wrong, Danny,” Barry says. “We’ve all felt that sometime…”
Danny’s shaking his head. “You don’t understand. You don’t wish in Amity Park.”
“Because of this Desiree?” Zatanna asks.
“Because of Desiree,” Danny confirms. “Some ghosts have very specific powers and those are usually strong powers. For Desiree, it’s… it was reality altering based on wishes. I forgot to never say ‘I wish’.”
After a moment of comprehending silence, Diana asks, “She had the power to make you fully human?”
“No, even borrowing power like I think she did, Desiree couldn’t do that. But that’s not what she needed to do. Normal isn’t a real thing, it’s just societal, you know? She just had to make sure no one remembered I was half dead and, tada, I had a normal life.”
John finally stops pacing and leans against the back of his chair. His cigarette is a mangled mess dangling from his lips. “What was the catch?”
“I wanted to be normal, so I had to stay normal. I couldn’t be noticed using any of my powers or being too ghostly or tell anyone I had died or what things used to be like. If I did— well you all saw what happened,” Danny looks up, finally, right at Wally. “It’s why I couldn’t tell any of you, even if I wanted too. It’s why I couldn’t use my powers to help. As soon as I did, I was good as dead.”
More than ever Wally wants to rush over to Danny’s side. He wants to let Danny know it’s alright that he kept this secret. It doesn’t matter. He settles for what he hopes is a reassuring smile.
“I still don’t know how I survived. As soon as Desiree appeared and took my powers, that should have been it for me. My ghost half can’t survive without them and my human half isn’t alive enough to last by itself. It would be like cutting off a normal person’s oxygen. I should have been ended.”
“We overloaded her,” Zatanna explains.
“Forced all your power— which there was a fucking lot of it— into her at once,” John finished. “She popped like a balloon with too much air.”
“Did you have to describe it that way?” Hal grumbles.
“Oh.” Danny blinks a few times as he took that in. “I guess, okay. I mean, yeah, I was more powerful than a lot of ghosts; something about being a halfa and my state being mutable still. I didn’t think though… right, okay. But how am I still here?”
“When she popped,” John says with a smirk towards Hal, “the air was full of ambient ectoplasm. Flash zapped you, re-started your heart, and the cloud went up like a match in a fart.”
Danny’s face wrinkled up at that. “Ew. But, alright. I mean it was my power first. I guess that…” Danny’s hand comes up to press over his sternum. “I guess that means this is my power level now.”
“And the rest of the curse?” Zatanna asks, leaning forward in her seat.
“Gone. People remember now.”
Wally thought to all the phone messages Danny had been getting in a new light.
“That’s why we need to make sure the portal is closed.”
“As well as that the GIW are shut down and that your parents do not try to harm you,” Diana says with that firm certainty of hers.
“Right,” Danny says after a beat. It’s hard to see how clearly Danny doesn’t consider himself a priority. “And… for the rest of it all?”
Diana tilts her head in question. “The rest of it?”
“I didn’t tell anyone my status. I lied to some of you. Is that…”
“You did what you needed to stay alive and hurt no one.” She holds up a hand to stop any protests from Danny. “While I have no doubt with your heart as it is you do not wish you could have done more, it would have never been asked of you at the cost of your life. You are a hero, Danny, and have been since you joined the Response Team in Central City. You have only continued to prove it by your willingness to act and the honor with which you did so. The Justice League is proud to still have you as your post, as soon as you are recovered.”
Finally the last of the tension drains Danny’s shoulders. “I’ll be happy to get back to it.”
Wally tunes Diana out as she wraps up the meeting.
“I’m going to ask him,” Wally says to Dick, who still has his hand.
“What? Now?” Dick hisses.
Wally watches as Danny shakes Clark’s hand. “Why not? Everyone’s here, like you said had to be.”
“Because it’s a debrief! That’s not exactly the most romantic moment.”
The other Titans are standing around them, waiting for their chance to see Danny. Even Gar is back.
“I almost missed my chance, N. I almost never got to ask,” Wally pleads. “I don’t want to miss it again.”
Dick just sighs and pulls a small case out of his belt. He presses it into their clasped hands before releasing his grip
Wally can feel the smile stretching across his face. “You know me so well.”
Dick just shoves Wally off his chair. “Go get your man. Ghost? Man ghost.”
Laughing, Wally fumbles to his feet and towards Danny.
“Danny!”
Danny who’s still here and alive.
Who smiles like the sun as he turns towards Wally.
“Yes?”
---
AN: I don't know, is it too cruel to end right there? 😇 Don't worry, we'll get an epilogue to hopefully tie the loose ends up in a bow! But this is the last half of the last full chapter! They know! And they still respect and love Danny. He can stop worrying~
You can subscribe to the masterpost here.
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writingsbychlo · 1 year
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false confessions | azriel
summary; you overhear azriel say something, and try to cooperate. word count; 4595 notes; based on this ask, that I got a little carried away with!
"I love her, I really do." Az sighed, your heart swelling a little as you listened from where you were perched within the library, Nesta at your side. When you'd heard the men come in, you'd been intent on going to see your mate, but they'd been talking, Cassian had been deep into a story about him and Nesta, and your friend had been adamant about hearing it out. So, you'd let her grab your wrist, sneaking the two of you deeper into the library, hiding away between the shelves where even Azriel's shadows had not bothered to slip away and investigate. 
"But?" Rhysand prompted, your heart skipping a beat in your chest at the pause that followed, the silence seeming to drag on. 
"But... she's so clingy sometimes." Azriel exhaled the words on a breath, and Cassian snickered a little in response. "I just- sometimes I want my peace and quiet, and it just feels like whenever we're together, she's right on top of me at home, we never just.. do our own thing."
Your stomach twisted, and Nesta's fingers tightened around your wrist as she was still gripping it. All playfulness was gone, though. She let go a second later, straightening up and brushing down her skirts primly, pausing only when you grasped her in response, shaking your head. You knew that your friend would defend you to the ends of the earth if you asked, but you didn't want her to. This wasn't her problem, or anyone else's, it was yours. 
You were spinning, mind feeling like it was going a million miles an hour, the way it felt to fly home with Azriel when drunk after a night at Rita’s, while your stomach twisted the way it did the morning after said nights out. You weren’t sure where this problem had come from, up until now, you’d always thought Azriel liked the affectionate side of you, the part that just couldn't get enough of him. Clearly, that was not the case.
Your eyes tracked the movements of Azriel's shadows as they slithered out further, lazily, but inching ever closer to you and Nesta's position. Slowly, in an attempt not to get caught at all, you snuck backwards, taking her with you. Manoeuvring through the stacks, you stayed hidden, the two of you slipping out through the back exit and unseen, and in silence. 
Only once their voices had entirely faded and you were slowing your pace between the twists and turns of the corridors did Nesta finally let a loud and obscene curse slip from her lips. "I'm gonna' kick ten tons of shit out of them all."
"No." The word was icy on your tongue, and her head snapped to you, You gave a soft wince in apology. "I'm not mad at him."
"What? Why not?" 
"Because.. he's right. I am clingy, I just thought he liked that. I thought he liked when we were together, I never sensed anything otherwise down the bond, perhaps he's just good at hiding it. But, you heard him, he doesn't like it, so it's down to me to stop." You shrugged, but it didn't stop the stinging in your throat, and you slammed up walls at your end of the bond, hoping the hurt beginning to build hadn't yet leaked across to reach him. 
"What I heard," Nesta muttered, ice on her own voice as her arms crossed angrily over her chest, "was my mate chuckling his smug little ass off at the comment. Jerk. He can sleep in another bed tonight." She was equally as angry, on your behalf, and you grinned a little at the affection she displayed for you. 
"You don't have to do that."
"It's for me. He doesn't get to gossip about things like this behind my back. I wonder how many things I have done that irritate him that he's never told me, simply choosing to whine about it to those other bats." She hissed the word out like an insult, and you couldn't find fault in her logic. "I'd bet Feyre would agree."
"Would agree with what?" You both jumped, rather violently, approaching the dinner hall where said sister was sitting comfortably, a sketchbook and some charcoals out in front of herself, brows raised. Nesta didn't hesitate, stalking across the room and offering her daemati sister her hand. Brushing off charcoal on her skirt, she took it gently, gasping a second later after replaying the memory. "Those... those jerks!”
“That’s what I said!” Nesta burst, hands on her hips, and only the soft cooing of her nephew was enough to replace the scowl she wore with a slight smile. Your attention remained fixed on Feyre as she processed the covert conversation you’d secretly witnessed.
“No wonder Rhys locked me out, I didn't think much of it, boy talk, but this kind of boy talk?" She frowned, offering a sympathetic look your way, and the solidarity of your friends made you feel that much better. You rubbed your temples, swallowing again thickly, the weight of it all beginning to bring you down a little. "Fey, can you just take me home?"
"Of course, Nesta will watch Nyx for a moment, right?" His auntie was already leaning over his bassinet, tapping the tip of his nose teasingly as the baby babbled happily in return. With a hand in hers, Feyre took you home, a warm hug and a chastising word about their behaviour, her parting gift, before leaving you alone in the house belonging to you and your mate. 
The house was quiet when you were alone, the middle of the day meaning you would be alone for quite a while yet, leaving you plenty of time to decide on your course of action. You glanced around, somehow feeling out of place within your own home. It all felt.. different, somehow.
Were you mad? No, only sad, and so retaliation didn't seem fair. 
Sure, you were upset he'd talk to his friends about it rather than simply tell you, but Azriel had always struggled with 'talking about it', and had never wanted to hurt you. Emotionally inept at times, perhaps this was simply his way of trying to protect your feelings. A conversation you were never supposed to hear, a hurt you were never supposed to feel, because your mate was simply putting up with it to let you feel better. 
You couldn’t have that. This relationship wasn’t supposed to be about secret sacrifices, it was supposed to be about trust and love and mutual respect. You’d sworn it when finding out you were mates, and sworn it again at the ceremony, and you tried to hold it up every day. Azriel wanted to spare your feelings, and now, you’d spare his, too.
It was hours before he returned, and you’d found yourself slipping back into your regular routine, making everything feel normal again by sticking to what you knew. You were unloading ingredients, cooking a comfort meal for yourself, when your mate returned home.
You first caught the tell-tale sign of feet hitting the ground outside from the sky, then steps got closer and closer up the pathway, before finally, the door opening and closing.
By the time you heard him taking off his boots and hanging up his coat, you'd found it within yourself to muster a reasonably convincing smile, and shake away any lingering thoughts about it. You are doing this for Azriel, to make him happy, to love him the way he’d loved you for years, without ever telling you. Your body twitched, aching to move to him like you always did, to greet him at the door with a kiss, with a hug, with something, and you firmly rooted your feet to the ground. After a pause, clearly anticipating what you now realised was an unwanted overload of affection, Azriel left the entry, stepping through the large open-arc into the kitchen. 
"Hello, my love.." You only smiled, ignoring the curious tone in his voice, brushing your hands down the front of your apron. "What have you been up to today?"
"I saw Nesta." 
"Oh?" He paused by your side, leaning down to press a kiss to your cheek, and you tipped your face to the side receiving it, but made no move for more the way you usually would. 
"She gave me a couple of new books, and said she’d return the other ones." You only hoped he simply hadn't noticed that the book pile on the coffee table had not, in fact, changed at all. He didn't glance over, and you moved away, to the food laid out ready to be prepared for dinner. 
"Are you alright, my love? You don't seem quite like yourself, tonight.”
You redirected your glance to the vegetables, only nodding in response, and taking a deep breath to force another smile. "I'm just fine, don't worry, just a little tired today."
He lingered for a second, before nodding himself, offering a smile in return, and a flush of reassuring love down the bond. You let it in, letting it warm you from the inside out. So, this is what he wanted, he had noticed and was already responding better. It was both relieving and painful. He rolled up his sleeves, taking another step closer to you. "What are we making? What can I do to help?"
"Not a thing, I've got it here, don't worry." His head shot up, brows furrowing once again, and your hand almost reached out, wishing to smooth that spot between on his face that had wrinkled with the frown. He noticed this time, the slight raise of your hand before you lowered it. 
"But, I thought you liked it when we cooked together? You said you like how I can tell you about my day, while we make dinner." It's true, you had said that, but that was just another one of the events you'd forced upon him, wasn't it? Another act where he wanted to do his own thing, but was instead beholden to your wishes.
"I do, but we don't have to cook together every night. I'm fine here, I was just in my thoughts, is all. You could tell me about your day while we eat?” A flash of hurt travelled across his face, as though you were rejecting him, and so it was your turn to send a pulse of love down the bond to him. He tugged in response, pulling a smile from you, a real one, the way it always did when he did that. 
With a kiss placed on your forehead, he left in silence a moment later. Not long after, his footsteps were on the stairs, bath filling in the bathroom, and you let out a sigh at his absence. 
He returned in time for dinner, one of his shadows had been left behind, not-so-subtly lingering near the chopping boards to monitor you, and so you'd been careful about making sure to seem positively chipper until he returned. He helped carry everything through to the table, commenting gently under his breath about how good it all looked, and you thanked him as you poured wine, letting him serve food for you both onto your respective plates. 
Taking opposite seats, the lull lasted not a full second, before Azriel was diving right into a spirited recap of his day:
"Rhysand and Cassian are in the doghouse." You almost slipped with your wine glass as you took a nerve-soothing sip, and Azriel was smirking as he chopped his chicken up, lifting a piece on his fork to his lips, awaiting your response. 
"Oh? And why is that?" You followed suit, hoping your tone didn't give it away, already knowing exactly why they were upset. All three of you had felt a little betrayed by their conversation behind your backs. 
"Not a clue. All I know is that after we finished our discussion, Nesta and Feyre wanted nothing to do with either. Rhys was all 'Feyre, darling, I was thinking we could catch dinner on the Sidra tonight, I made a reservation'," Azriel mocked his best friend's voice, and genuine laughter spilt from you, his eyes glittering a little and the bond between you humming once again. "And then Feyre said 'I was thinking I'd rather spend the evening with anyone else, right now, actually'. He was speechless. As were Cass and I." 
He was so excited to share the gossip, like it was the most exciting thing that had ever happened, and the thought that perhaps this wouldn't be so hard crossed your mind. The same Azriel, the same you, just with less.. togetherness. Less touching. Perhaps, it would even make the times together and the touches even more special than you'd always thought they were. "And Cassian?"
"Even worse. He was in the midst of laughing at Rhys' shocked face when Nesta all but removed his balls in front of us." He took a swig of his wine, and you placed a piece of chicken into your mouth, excited to hear just how she'd unleashed that anger she'd been holding when you'd last seen her. "She said, 'oh, laugh it up, bat boy. See how much you're laughing when you're laying in bed alone tonight, nothing but your right hand to keep you company'."
That made your jaw drop, Azriel's deep laughter permeating the air at your reaction, and you felt proud of your friend, even if you did feel a little bad for Cassian. That's what they get for complaining behind their mates' backs instead of being honest. 
"So, Feyre then proceeded to thank Rhysand for the reservation, take both Nyx and Nesta and winnow away without another word. Presumably to said reservation for a lovely sisterly dinner." Az shrugged, turning back to his food, and you sipped at your wine. Good for them. "When I left, Rhys and Cass were grumbling at the dinner table, trying to work out what they'd done wrong."
That sent a pang of pain shooting back through your chest, but you quickly suppressed it, beginning to tell him all about your own day, and your suddenly-made plans to go shopping instead of sitting at home with him all day tomorrow. He didn't object, only encouraged you. 
After dinner, with plates cleared away and wine glasses refilled, you'd both moved to the living room, a quiet night planned as he settled onto the couch, book in hand, opening his action-packed thriller to the page he'd left off at as you stoked the fire idly, stocking a few more logs on. 
When there was nothing more you could do to it, you stood, brushing down your skirts and leaving the room, not missing the trail of his eyes after you, or the sweep of one of his shadows, trying to curl around your ankle as you hurried through the house and up the stairs. You had planned to simply settle into bed, let your mind spin and wander, but with his watchful little trick giving you it's full-attention, you were forced to move through your preparations for bed, and follow its lead when it wrapped itself around your wrist, tugging you back downstairs. 
When you returned, Azriel's glass was empty, book still open, but his gaze was on the doorway as you walked through it. "Where'd you go?"
"I thought I'd prepare for bed before reading tonight, seeing as I'm so tired, that way I can get in bed as soon as the need arises." Your hands locked in front of yourself, and dipped his head in a gesture toward your book pile. 
"Will you sit with me and read for a while, then?"
"Of course." What were you supposed to do, say no? You were giving him space, but when he asked you to stay, who were you to deny it? Picking up the book from the top of the pile, you settled down into the large armchair on one side of the table, perpendicular to the couch Azriel sat on. As you opened your book, his snapped shut, and he let out a rough sigh. 
"What are you doing?"
"I'm reading." You teased, waving your book at him, but he was not in such a playful mood, it seemed. 
"I see that. Why are you doing it over there?"
You faltered. What now? Confess to hearing him, or continue to spare his feelings the way he had been sparing yours for years. The choice seemed clear. "Sitting closer to the fire, so I don't get cold."
"You never get cold, because you sit with me. You sit here, and if you get cold, I wrap a wing around you, and you get that cute little blush on your face and make one of those jokes about Illyrians being built warmer for those 'damn cold mountains'. So, why are you sitting over there?"
Busted. You worried your lower lip, trying to decide exactly what to say, but he beat you to it, his face crumpling a little as realisation washed over him. 
"You heard us in the library." It wasn't a question, no, it was a statement. A fact, he knew it. Your mate was far too intelligent and deductive for his own good, sometimes. He put down his book, crossing the room in a flash, and removing yours from your hold too. He slipped down to one knee before you, grasping your hands in his, and he gaped for a few moments, no words coming. "I didn't mean it," was what he settled on. 
"'Course you did, Az. It's okay." You squeezed his hands lightly, and he gripped back firmer, like you might pull away from him if he didn't hold on. "I was a little upset to know you'd rather tell your friends than simply tell me if something I was doing was bothering you, but you're allowed to be bothered by things."
"No, I didn't mean it, my love. Please, don't take it to heart." There was a pleading under his voice, like he thought this might drive a wedge between you both, and you pried one hand free to sit comfortingly over his cheek. His head tipped into the touch. 
"Az, it's okay, really. Not everything is always going to be perfect between us, but in future, if I do something you don't like, just tell me, okay?"
"No, no, no.." He was panicking now, so much so that the fear was beginning to ripple down the bond, you couldn't just hear it in his voice but feel it ricocheting through your own chest. Cold, like shards of ice. "Everything is perfect, and that is the problem. Rhys was complaining about all the changes with Nyx. About how he loves his son so much, but lately, Feyre hasn't even wanted to touch him, and she's had such mood swings because of the sleepless nights, he's frazzled. One minute she's coming onto him, the next she's snapping at him because he didn't kiss her just right. Cassian was complaining because Nesta is so fiercely independent and he loves it, but when all that overprotective side of him kicks in and she snaps at him for going full-Cass-mode on her, he hates it. He wishes sometimes she'd just let him clean her wounds and treat her gently."
You didn't know quite what to say, confusion filling you, and he pressed on, pushed a little closer, never letting your gaze slip from his, holding you captive with it.
"Then they were looking at me, like I was supposed to say something, anything. Like, they'd been vulnerable about things they couldn't tell their mates without feeling embarrassed, as though it was my turn. I couldn't think of anything, because, baby, everything is perfect. All I wanted to say was, 'can't relate, Rhysand; maybe one day but not today. Can't relate Cassian; my girl protects me as much as I protect her, we fuss over each other'. I didn't want to upset them, and I realised what they wanted was clingy, the kind of clingy we have, the kind of clingy I love. So, I tried to tell them it wasn't all it seemed, so they'd feel better."
His thumbs soothed over your knuckles, the only sounds between you being the popping of the fire and the ticking of the large clock, until you sighed. He leaned down, kissing the hand still clutched in his own, before twisting to press a kiss to the palm on his cheek before you could retract it. 
"It damn near broke my heart when you didn't greet me at the door tonight. It's my favourite part of getting up in the morning, knowing that when I come home, you'll come flying into my arms, and show me so much love, a kind of love I never thought I'd have. But you didn't, you said you were fine, though. I worried you were mad at me, too. You didn't want to cook together, I hated that, because I like being part of the things you like. You didn't kiss me, you haven't kissed me all night, I miss it. I miss it so much. You didn't hold my hand at dinner, and now you won't sit with me. I'm worried, my love. I'm scared, you have to believe me."
He raised his free hand, sitting it tenderly over your jaw, just like you did for him, swiping his thumb delicately back and forth across your cheekbone. It was an act you adored so much, something he knew brought you peace and comfort, and at this moment, it was doing just that. You could feel the fear in his words as it echoed in your chest, the desperation as he waited for your response. Lifting the hand from his cheek, his gaze tracked the movement, watching your hand hover for a split second over his head. He didn't let the half-second become a full one. He took your hand, lacing it into his hair where it had been headed, your fingernails scratching over his scalp in the soothing way he loved so much. 
"Always touch me. Never hesitate. I don't care if we're at dinner or on a battlefield, but your touch, your attention, your love is everything. Never stop." His eyes fluttered closed in bliss, but he was still tense. "Just say you forgive me."
"I do not, because there's nothing to forgive." His breath hitched at the beginning of your sentence, eyes snapping open wide, and you leaned forward to rest your forehead on his. "Next time, come up with something that's not going to hurt my feelings, even if I shouldn't be eavesdropping."
He smirked at that, nose brushing yours and he laughed breathily. "Next time, I'm just going to take the teasing and let them know how utterly fucking hard in love I am."
"Well, that works too." You smiled, before he was sitting up more, raising from his one knee and pressing his hands underneath your body. "What are you doing?"
"Moving you so we can sit together."
"I'll just come to the couch-"
"Won't be close enough, now." He muttered, scooping you up enough to settle into the wing-designed chair, and situating you sideways across his lap as your eyes rolled. He left a soft bite to your covered shoulder in response. "Don't roll your eyes at me, you had me freaking out. I thought you weren't going to forgive me. I thought you weren't going to.. to be the you that I love, anymore.."
"Yes, well, that's over now." You leaned in, kissing the tip of his nose for emphasis, but uncertain eyes found yours again.
"You mean it?"
"I do." You pressed another kiss to his jaw, fingernails moving back to rake through the thick black hair on the top of his head.
"You'll greet me at the door tomorrow with a kiss?" Mm-hm. "You'll let me cook with you?" Your lips moved up to his cheek, nuzzling there sweetly as you left little pecks across his skin, mm-hm. "You'll hold my hand at the table, and play footsie, and you'll curl up on the couch with me after?" Mm-hm, your kisses reached the corner of his mouth, and you felt it twitch into a smile underneath your lips. "You'll cuddle with me in bed tonight?"
"And every other night, for the rest of our lives." 
Something akin to adoration raced through your chest, filling every part of you. Despite his pink-tinged cheeks, Azriel was confident in his requests, hazel eyes shining as he looked at you. "And you'll kiss me, you'll hold me, every time you want to. Promise me, you'll never hide your affection from me, promise me you'll show me your love for as long as you feel it for me?"
"As long as you promise the same to me." He nodded, vehemently, sealing the deal with an urgent kiss, and you felt a tingling mark forming on the back of your neck, alongside the mating bond you'd made together so many years ago. Another promise formed, to be held forever. 
His lips worked against your own, fingers slipping from where they sat on your cheek to smooth up, no longer running his fingers gently along your jaw but tracing soft tips over the patch on your neck. His lips became a smile in the kiss, teasing and sweet, a breathy sound slipping from you as he nipped at your lower. 
“We should go upstairs.” He whispered, and your arms looped around his neck, prepared for the movement that was so come as he began to shuffle toward the edge of the seat. Raising with you in his arms, he walked a path he was familiar with, your lips beginning to trace his cheekbone the way his thumb had yours moments prior, when a sudden thought crossed your mind. You gasped, sitting up stock straight and Azriel paused at the base of the stairs, brows raising, half-lidded eyes attempting to focus at your reaction. “What is it, my love?”
“We.. we have to go and tell Nesta and Feyre we worked things out.” Azriel stared for a moment, before a blinding grin was splitting across his face. It was more than a smile, it was amused and cheeky and youthful in a way he rarely showed, only in moments like this where the two of you were truly alone, when he let himself be vulnerable. A deep chuckle followed, before he was moving again, climbing the stairs with you in his arms, smile becoming a smirk. 
“So you’re the reason my brothers are in such trouble, huh?” He leaned down, nipping at the shell of your ear as he backed his way into your bedroom, kicking the door shut behind himself. Dropping you down onto the bed, enough to be able to crawl toward you as you backed up into the pillows, he didn’t let up with the wicked stare. “Let it be, we can tell them tomorrow. Consider tonight a punishment for complaining.”
“Were you not technically part of that conversation, Az? Should you not also be punished?” Your words held no threat, and he knew it too, because he only dipped his head down once he was supporting himself above you. His lips dragged over your skin, up from your chin to the shell of your ear, only to whisper;
“Oh, I think I've been punished enough for tonight. I can come up with some much more fun things for us to do..”
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Want You Back | ateez x reader
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Pairing: werewolf!ot8!ateez x werewolf!reader
Genre: fluff mostly, romance, poly, a little angst?
Warnings: mention of being depressed
Word Count: 1537 words
a/n: hello! welcome to the first chapter of my new story! I hope you enjoy it, and I would love your feedback especially when it comes to structure and flow of the story. I'm still getting the hang of tumblr again, so if you'd like to be a part of a taglist, please leave a comment under this post! :)
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Chapter 1
How did it end up like this?
This question never left your mind as you stared out at the forest trees in your backyard from your balcony, arms folded with a blank facial expression as the cool wind blew by and the beautiful moon shone in all its brilliance and wonder over you. 
Luna meant moon. And it also meant the alpha female of the pack with your mate, this being determined by the Moon Goddess herself. Luckily for you, you had eight mates. Being a Luna meant one thing and one thing only. You were just a partner to your mate. You were to produce your mate or mates’ offspring and most of your education was dedicated to learning how to be a good mate. You never learnt anything outside of that.
And you hated it.
You loved your mates through and through. You loved the way Hongjoong would nestle into your arms and nuzzle into your neck when no one was watching, because he wasn't the biggest fan of public displays of affection. You were enamoured with Seonghwa - every time the both of you would cook meals together and his not so subtle way of making you blush. 
Yunho was the most endearing one you had met, he wasn't afraid to show his affection for you, and would grab and spin you around and then look you in the eyes with the warmest and sweetest smile as if you held the entire galaxy in your eyes. Meanwhile, Yeosang was the opposite, he was much more shy than Yunho but he never steered away from showing you how much you meant to him. The both of you would find a book to read together and would place yourselves in the little corner of his window with your head in his lap and him mindlessly playing with your hair while you both read for hours upon end. 
San loved adventures and sharing them with you. He would always take you with him wherever he went and together, you would create endless memories of the day and take endless pictures with an old film camera for your album. Mingi liked playing games so you two would play board games and sometimes even make up your own games which was a special thing just for the two of you. Only the two of you knew the rules. 
Like Seonghwa, Wooyoung loved to cook with you. He wouldn't shy away from giving you a big kiss on the cheek or lips and wouldn't hesitate to create a little chaos so you would chase him and he could scoop you up and kiss you again.
Jongho loved the little moments with you. When the two of you would just watch tv or even do laundry together. He liked just being with you. His favourite memory being the time you nearly fought an aunty at the laundromat for the basket and sat inside of it refusing to budge. He laughed endlessly that day as he watched you place yourself with your hair falling in front of your face and a determined look plastered.
These 8 boys meant the world to you. But with time comes growing up and growing up means taking up responsibility. They were in charge of leading the pack, taking control and handling all the affairs. And with time, things had changed. 
You hardly saw them anymore even though you all lived together. And with time, you started to realise how lost you felt. You didn't know what to do with yourself. You tried cooking and baking to pass the time, but what fun was it when you didn't have anyone to share the food with? The boys were gone for long periods of time, sitting in meetings, negotiating pack deals and handling personal issues within the pack. They weren't there like they used to be and suddenly, it seemed like they just expected that you would be there for them. They started to take you for granted, and it hurt. It hurt a lot.
At first you tried to rationalise it. They were busy taking care of the pack. But then, Hongjoong's mom, who never hid her dislike for you, introduced the pack to a new member who she hoped would take your place. Lila was the only other girl the boys knew besides you and their siblings. And in their mind, it was nice to have a new friend, especially someone who came from a different pack from another part of the realm. 
But they didn't realise they were neglecting you. And slowly, as you saw the way they strayed away from you and Hongjoong's mom constantly berating everything you did, you became depressed and struggled to do anything. The boys noticed but still didn't realise it for what it was.
"It's okay to take time but you can't be lazy."
"It's just a phase."
"You should dress up more like Lila."
You were tired, beyond tired and drained. Nights consisted of you being unable to fall asleep until 1AM, and mornings consisted of waking up at the crack of dawn with all the hurt and pain rushing back in as you came back to reality. All you wanted was to feel like yourself again. You wanted the pain you felt to stop. You wanted the tears that flowed every night like a rushing stream as you muffled yourself into your pillow to stop. You wanted to feel like you again. 
Hongjoong's father was aware of his wife's motives and chastised and begged her to stop. But she ignored him and continued to attack you. He decided you needed a space for yourself until he could talk to his son. He would've done it already if the stupid rogue pack would stop threatening to wage war. 
So he told you about the secret lake and the Moon Goddess temple. Werewolf history prophesied that the lake was where wishes came true and the one with a pure heart and soul could see the Moon Goddess herself if they were truly devoted. In addition, some lore claimed that the lake was a portal to the human realm. Since 1998, all of the realms had been closed off to the human realm after the great siege, and no one had been to the human realm since.
And that's where you spent your time. You befriended the forest animals, you made flower crowns, prayed in the temple seeking for solace from your harsh reality and tried to keep yourself busy for the day.
No one knew of this and Hongjoong's mom tried to insinuate you were seeing someone. But his father immediately put a stop to it, saying that he had you helping out with the young pups on the other side of town.
All fared well for the most part. You still weren't okay but you had a safe space. 
And then it all went down.
You were snapped out of your thoughts. A loud bang pierced through the entire mansion with shrill screams and shouts. 
The rogue werewolf clan attacked that night. 
Everyone screamed and scrambled as fast as they could have. They pushed and rushed for safety as wails pierced through the air. The boys were on the other side of the town and in the large mansion were only you, the boys' families and some members of the pack and the mansion’s workers. 
You raced out of the room hoping to find someone, but ran into one of the rogues with a sickening and sinister smile on his face. You could fight but you weren’t sure if you could take him especially with that giant axe in his hand. Before you could react, a loud clang rang through the room and the rogue fell to the ground groaning in pain as blood began to leak out from the back of his head. In place of him stood your dear friend Cleo, daughter of one of the maids. She breathed heavily, still coming to terms with what she just did.
“Cleo! That was amazing!” 
“Yeah…hah, didn’t know I had that in me.”
As another loud bang was heard, you both snapped out of your thoughts and began to search for a way out. Suddenly, you remembered the secret passage in the library. Both you and Cleo scampered as fast as you could, tripping on your own feet as adrenaline rushed through you and you could hear your heartbeat in your ears. Finally arriving at the library, you slammed the door and began to find the book that would get you out of here.
You had barely escaped that night. You ran to the lake, stumbling and pushing the fear down your chest. You and Cleo both split up deciding that was the best idea at the moment. In the clearing, you looked around hoping to feel safe. But you could hear the evil snarls and growls approaching you. You didn't know what to do and looked towards the temple, a small prayer on your tongue. 
After that, only one thing came to mind, you hoped those swimming classes would pay off now. You jumped in the lake. As you opened your eyes under the water, there was not much you could see except…a white glow. It gave off a safe vibration, you felt drawn to it.
As you tried to swim towards it, your vision started to become hazy.
And then, it all went dark.
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ageingfangirl2 · 5 months
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Never Have I Ever! Red Hair Pirates (One Piece)
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Part 2
You play a game of Never Have I Ever and secrets come to light that some crew would rather forget. Reader x Red Hair Pirates FLUFF (Female reader implied)
You walk onto the deck after finishing documenting the last battle since Shanks had assigned you the ship scribe and roll your eyes as the rest of the crew sits in a circle drinking and laughing. You didn't mind a drink here and there but sometimes pirates could be a little excessive when it came to booze and celebrating after a successful battle.
Shanks spots you and waves you over wearing his trademark drunken grin, 'come play with us,' he slurs, and brings the bottle in his hand up to his lips.
You roll your eyes again and approach the circle, 'what are you guys playing?'
Benn notices you looking for an empty spot since there were none and immediately pulls you down to sit on his lap, 'never have I ever doll.'
Yasopp hands you a bottle of unopened wine, 'you take it in turns saying something you haven't done, and if someone has done the thing they have to drink and tell the story.'
Benn squeezes your thigh and smirks, 'We're about to find out some of your secrets, hit us with your best shot.'
You uncork the wine and take a large swig, you had a bone to pick with Benn for embarrassing you in town earlier and you had just the right ammunition to take away his smugness.
'Okay, never have I ever...' you pause, and everyone in the circle leans in a little closer because you didn't share a lot about yourself, '...never have I ever seen my captain's dick.'
Benn scowls at you, 'You little minx, I told you that in private.'
You pout, 'Drink up and spill old man, unless our beloved captain wants to tell the story.'
Shanks howls with laughter, 'Benn's seen my dick several times. You jealous little lady?'
'Seven...' you stutter.
Benn pretty much finishes his whole drink before talking, 'I never initiated any of them, that's all on Shanks.'
However what shocks you next is that one by one the rest of the guys start drinking, and if your jaw could hit the deck it would as Shanks continues laughing.
'He showed me in the kitchen when I was prepping vegetables, compared it against a bunch of carrots,' Lucky says with a grimace, 'it took me a while to pick up another carrot.'
'Rockstar and I were fishing and he simply whipped it out,' Lime Juice says calmly, 'we promised never to talk about it again.'
'It wasn't long after the formation of the crew. We got drunk and had a dick measuring contest,' Yasopp speaks up, 'it sobered me right up.'
Hongo clicks his tongue, 'it wasn't even medical. Like Rockstar and Lime Juice, I was minding my own business in the infirmary, and he waltzed in real pride in himself.
You notice Benn pout next to you, 'What's wrong? Did you think you were special?'
'Maybe a little,' Benn mumbles into his empty bottle.
You find your captain's eyes and he's smirking at you mischievously, 'I'm going to like playing this game with you, everyone tells you their secrets.'
The game abruptly ended after your one and only turn, the crew wanting to drown their sorrows, and a lot more booze was consumed to forget the image of Shank's dick.
You finish your wine and decide to leave the pity party and head towards the back of the ship to get a better view of the stars. You were pretty satisfied with the carnage you'd caused, maybe now you wouldn't be teased or pranked as much.
'You never answered my earlier question,' Shanks slurs from behind you.
You spin around and see Shanks leaning casually against the railing, 'err what was the question, captain?'
Shanks saunters towards you, 'You jealous you haven't seen your captain's dick? You're the odd one out.'
You shake your head and cover your eyes as Shanks's hand goes to the waistband of his pants, your cheeks blushing, 'I'm not jealous, I wanted to get back at Benn for embarrassing me. Please keep it in your pants captain.'
You gasp as you feel Shanks's arm go around you pulling you against his chest, feeling the fabric of his pants on your legs so you don't have to worry and open your eyes, 'you're going to give me a heart attack one day captain.'
Shanks ruffles your hair, 'I'll never make you feel uncomfortable. But when you're ready to see your first dick I'll make sure it's mine.'
You grew up on an island full of women, so until meeting Shanks and the rest of the crew you had limited knowledge of men. After agreeing to join the crew because you wanted an adventure you slowly started your education of men. Maybe pirates shouldn't have been your first introduction.
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bamsara · 7 days
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A03 Questions Tag Game
I got tagged by: @kagedbird I tag: @onethirdofimpossible, @coffincrows, (first two that come to mind) and anyone else who wants to do the game
1 – How many works do you have on AO3?
At the time of writing this post, currently 30 fics. (Not including any fics or written works that are not posted to AO3)
2 – What's your total AO3 word count?
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1,066,633
3 – What fandoms do you write for?
Formerly: Don't Starve, FNAF, Dragons Dogma, Invader Zim
Currently: Cult of the Lamb
4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?
Solar Lunacy, Celestial Omens, Bytes of Lunacy, The Rehabilitation of Death, Saturday Insomnia
5 – Do you respond to comments?
I try to but I also get very nervous responding because I often don't know what to say back and I feel like it's almost rude or disrespectful to respond to a comment, esp the very nice ones that are long and in-deph with just a keysmash or a bunch of emojis, but I do read every single one since I have email notifications on for them
I'd like to sit down and respond to many but I really don't want to make it awkward so pls dear god readers forgive me
6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I don't like unhappy endings. I enjoy angsty stories but I like when it's at least ending happy to me
7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Not posted? Solar Lunacy
Ongoing? TROD
8 – Do you get hate on fics?
Not really? Most adults (in my experience) know the 'don't like don't read' rule and know basic online etiquette. I've gotten some for discontinuing a fic or switching fandoms though
9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
I don't write or draw NSFW! I like to make some suggestive themes sometimes, but I'm a very ace person, it's not something I do often. (I do have a current running goal that if my friend reaches their donation goal for their medical bills that I would give NSFW a shot, but again its not really my cup of tea)
10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
Nah I haven't written any cross overs, but I do draw them sometimes. Recently I've been spinning a Alice in Wonderland x COTL crossover in my head.
11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yep. I've had people copy and paste my work, go in with a thesaurus to change a few words (like changing 'angry' to mad, 'upset' to 'sad', and so forth) to try and avoid detection and re-posted my written work under a different title name. AO3 staff took them down for violating their policy against plagiarism though
12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?
No. I wouldn't mind it so as long as I'm asked before hand, though not on anon so I can actually work with the person to prevent any mistranslations or mishandling, and that I don't want my work posted to other websites
13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?
I think I did when I was a teen but I cannot remember now
14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?
Eh I don't have any favorites, just ones I really focus on for a long while
15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Pass.
16 – What are your writing strengths?
I can sit down for hours or several days and work on a writing wip completely in the zone. I cant do it on command but its at least something I can do
17 – What are your writing weaknesses?
Spelling and grammar, and sometimes long running sentences. I just kinda write, theres not really a goal for it to be perfect though so as long as the story gist and vibe is right, im fine with it
18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I've done it before but only minor, had a friend help me with it (one or two lines of dialogue) Aside from that, I'm not comfortably fluent enough in anything to do it again without assistance
19 – First fandom you wrote for?
Soul Eater, when I was wayyy too young to be posting anything on the internet. My fanfics I wrote are still on fanfic.net to this day
20 – Favorite fic you've written?
It's inbetween TROD and EE&E right now
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taylormarieee · 29 days
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Co-Stars turned Lovers A Callum Turner love story
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Chapter 1: "Welcome to the Beginning"
Pairing: Callum Turner x Fem!Bestfriend!Actress!Reader
Word Count: 2.k
Warnings: Kissing for like 2 secs, none really
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You and Callum were the best of friends. Every Interview didn't feel the same without the other. You and him first starred together on Fantastic Beasts: Crimes Of Grindelwald and you bonded ever since.
You loved him so much and he loves you just the same. You were always spotted around LA together, always around in photos in Paris or New York to the point rumors went around that you guys were dating.
That wasn't the case at all. You were filming a new show and it took place in Paris and sometimes New York, so you constantly had to fly back and forth and you felt alone at times.
So you always invited Callum to which he happily obliged when he was free. You booked a hotel for however long you stayed in that place and always ordered a room with two beds.
One for you, and one for Callum. He was your favourite person in the whole world as you were his. He enjoyed your company and you felt as though you couldn't live without his company.
You had separation anxiety so you always felt sad when he wasn't around and would drive or fly as many hours as it took just to be with him. He was your Earth and you were his Moon. Without you he felt as though his world wouldn't spin anymore.
Without him you felt as though you had no purpose in life. Your sole purpose was to orbit around him, be around him as much as possible. You couldn't breathe without Callum.
But there were times where you had to just thug it out and do things on your own without him. He had a life too and you didn't want to seem like that annoying friend that seemed as though she didn't have a life and was just constantly around him.
There were times you will distance yourself from him if it meant you didn't seem or look annoying. But Callum of course, the sweet soul that he is never minded you clung to him 24/7. He enjoyed it actually, it made him feel appreciated and loved.
You gave him attention like crazy and he was a mama's boy. He loved feeling your validation and feeling as if he was wanted. He was drawn to you and you were drawn to him and this was the beginning of a love story you both never anticipated. The beginning of a story you both would soon realize was fate and destiny, the universe bringing you two together.
~ Welcome to the Beginning~
"Welcome to the late late show, I'm your host James Corden and I would like to welcome out our lovely guests."
Everyone in the crowd cheers and your giggling with Callum and Austin. You were so excited to be on the Late Late Show with THE James Corden. You loved James Corden.
"Gosh why am I so nervous!" You nervously giggle and look at Callum and Austin. "Maybe it's because you love James?" Austin says with a smirk on his face. It was more of a statement then a question.
"Y/n Y/l/n, Callum Turner, and Austin Butler!" He screams out and that's your cue for all three of you to walk out. You smile and wave at all the lovely people that have come out to see you guys.
Because your the first one out because the boys decided ladies first, Your the first to give James a hug. You laughed as he gave you a big loving hug. You sat down and waited for the boys to sit.
Austin sat closest to James and Callum sat on the opposite side next to you. So in shorter words, you sat in between the two.
"Welcome Welcome!" James says happily. "It's lovely to have you guys on the show." He says.
"Well were happy to be here!" You say with a dashing smile on your face.
"Alrighty let's get started shall we? Y/N! You are a beautiful amazing woman and an even more amazing actress! What was it like to first get into acting? Who were your role models and people you would have liked to tell that they inspired you to act?" He asks.
"oo that is a wonderful question. I found it quite easy and hard at the same time. I was a very dramatic kid, as my mother would say" You say with a chuckle, the audience chuckles as well.
"And it just made things easier. But at times I was very forgetful so it was hard to remember some of my lines, but being a kid actor who's just starting you realize that the adults working with you aren't going to be harsh because your a kid, you know? So that really helped because Adults have a big impact on kids cause your taller, seem more intimidating. But no yea, it was very easy. And my role model growing up I would have to say was either Leonardo Di Caprio or Will Smith. I really liked The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air."
Everyone claps at your answer and the queit down the moment James talks, "That's a wonderful answer. I love that! Now Callum and Austin, I heard you guys went to boot camp training for Masters of the Air. What was that like? Training to just be really hot and outlook people like me?" When James maks that comment you burst out laughing and the whole crowd laughs too.
James really had a way of making jokes and making people laugh. Austin and Callum laugh as well.
"That's what I've been saying James! There both incredibly attractive and I feel like that boot camp didn't give them any training except how to make other men feel bad!" You say through laughs.
James grabs your hand and laughs with you. "Right! At least I have someone to back me up and not call me insecure, Thank you!" He says.
You nod and smile at him before letting Austin and Callum answer. "Ugh well no it was a very fun time of training to outlook other men! No I'm kidding. It was very fun and felt so real, and when you really see the work we did on the big screen it's like, woah I didn't think it would come out that good. Cuz you know behind the scenes were goofing around and having little to know clue what's gonna happen next so yea it was a huge roller coaster." Austin explains.
You nod and give out a hum of approval and look at Callum, "Do you have anything to add on to that?" James asks.
"Nope, I mean I would have said it just like that. It was very fun and having y/n on set? Oh it was never a dull moment when it came to her. We all had a lot of fun." He says. You smile and look back at James.
"Alrighty, let's get to the juicy stuff!" James says smiling. You face fall and you mutter out an "Oh no." And the crowd starts laughing because you forgot that the mic's pick up everything.
"Why oh no y/n." Your face lights up with surprise and you cover your face in embarrassment.
"Because I know exactly what the juicy stuff is! So, to answer your question, no me and Callum are not dating Mr. Corden!" You say with a laugh at the end.
"Wow! Do a lot of Interviewers ask you that question?" He asks.
"yes, everyday!" You and Callum say at the same time. "I promise you were just really good friends who hang out alot because one of us has separation anxiety from their comfort person." Callum says motioning towards you.
You laugh and then hit his arm playfully. "I'm filming between Paris and New York so you'll spot me with Callum alot because sometimes I get lonely so of course I'm gonna bring my best friend!"
"Yea there was a few times she brought me but I guess paparazzi don't see us or they do and just don't ship me and her together." Austin defends.
"Ok ok, so well then that question is moved over, completely erased."
After that the interview, you, Callum and Austin decide to go out to eat. You chose the restaurant, you always did. You never wanted to because you were always indecisive but you eventually chose a place and you guys went to dine.
Sadly, Austin couldn't stay with you guys as his girlfriend called and needed him home for something urgent. Something about her cutting her hand. You both said your goodbyes and wished she was ok before sitting and ordering.
This was the night you realized your true feelings for Callum Turner...
This was the night you would never forget... The night it all happened and was brushed off as a mistake.
"Callum... today was so exhausting. I hate when people ship us, I mean I don't hate James, I'm just tired of getting asked that same question over and over again! Aren't you?" You ramble on about today's earlier events.
"I mean, if i'm being honest... I don't care. Me and you both know were best friends so why bother entertaining it." he says as he leans closer to you from across the table.
"Unless of course...You wanna deny the fact that you would ever date me? Do you not love me or something?" He teases with a smirk on his face.
That. That right there is what started it... What started your feelings and the electricity that shot down your spine.
"N-No that's... that's not what I'm saying or i-implying Callum!" You say nervously. You were never nervous around Callum.
"Mhmm yeah...sure." He says still leaning forward even closer to you know. 'Maybe he's intoxicated' you thought. He was never this straightforward with you or even this flirtatious with you.
You guys were drinking in the car but not heavily. His hand reaches your cheek and you giggle nervously. "C-Callum what are you doing?" You ask nervously.
"I'm feeling your face duh! What else would I possibly be doing..." He says. You notice he's not making eye contact with you but more so your lips. You lick them nervously and you see his eyebrow raise for a second.
He leans in just a little closer whispering a "God your so beautiful" before he kisses you. Your eyes are wide and you melt into it. He quickly breaks away and apologizes before you could even kiss him back.
"Oh my lord, I'm sorry... i don't know what came over me. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable that-that was a mistake." He says before rubbing his face with his hands.
"I-It's ok Callum. I'm not uncomfortable. Let's just eat ok?" You say with a sweet smile to hide the sadness in your face from him. He sweetly smiles back at you and you both indulge.
That night was a night you've never forgotten but what you were completely oblivious too was that that night was unforgettable to Callum too.
He thought about that night everyday he looked at you... everytime he touched you... everytime he sees lip gloss coat your full lips.
It plagued his mind like a virus corrupting a humans mind. He wanted you badly but he knew he couldn't have you. He couldn't ruin this relationship he had with you, this beautiful friendship, but goddamn were you addicting.
you and Callum were polar opposites yet destined to be together...If only you two could open your eyes and see what is right in front of you.
You and him were made for each other, you just needed to find each other. Like two lost souls searching for a purpose. Like the Earth and the Moon, they look platonic but one can't live without the other. Destined to fall in love either way.
Love, fate, and desire... Something you two need to give into in order to find yourselves.
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Taglist: @dustbunniess @willyoubemycherryy and anyone else that wants to join!
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despairots · 10 months
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could you do a story where miles from earth-42 and our miles are twins and we cant decide which one we like better as we like both of them? you can write the story however you want to!
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━━━━━━━━ if i were you, i’d do me.
earth1610! miles morales x gn! hacker! reader x earth42! miles morales. fluff and if you like squint really really hard you’ll find angst. 18 and above please dni, unless your my moot or something… i forgot to change my requests to open but u can send me requests (only abt atsv) just like be patient cuz im daydreaming and shit 🙏
pls ignore the title its nothing suggestive i was braindead and was listening to my saved audios on tiktok this was thw first one on my saved so el oh el 🤕 i gotta keep my writing grind up. keep in mind that earth 1610 miles will keep beinf spiderman and earth 42 will keep being prowler. if y dont know sliver wolf from hsr, switch her up cuz reader is heavily based off of her
this’ll be left on a cliffhanger cuz like idk i just dont wanna make another part and sometimes things are better off with cliffhangers since you guys have creative minds you can come up with your own scenarios
where in a dimension, earth42 and earth1610 miles morales are twins, may look the same but have completely different hairstyles and different personalities also another weird, interesting fact, you’re a sucker for twins, especially them.
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interesting fact about you, specifically you, is that you almost got caught by the government when hacking into their system to steal some information.
and of course, them having connections to spiderman, told him to go after this hacker who causes a lot of trouble for the government.
miles morales obviously being under that mask and friends with this hacker who knew that you hated authority (yes, you’re an anarchist), didn’t bother doing anything, probably just telling you to stop messing with them.
on the other hand, his twin bother, myles morales, encourages this behaviour. polar opposites but two cuties, and you, who got roped into romance with them.
“[name], what’d i say about hacking the government?” miles scolded you as you chewed on bubblegum with your feet propped onto your desk, holographic screens in front of you.
“i don’t know, me forgot.” you nonchalantly shrugged, spinning your chair to go back to your screens and swiping left to play the weeknd.
miles spinning you back and placing his arms on your arm rests, too close to your liking.
you smirked with a light scoff, “your brother likes it.” miles rolls his eyes at the mention of him, “i don’t care what he likes.” he snapped back, obviously lying.
miles leaned back with a sigh, “god, what am i gonna do with you?” “maybe get off my ass.” you muttered, not knowing if miles heard that, to which he did.
“i’m sorry, what?”
you jumped at that, quickly shooting your arms up and trying to find excuses, opening your mouth like a fish.
your voice’s overlapped eachother, unable to hear his twin brother opening the door to your room, mask off and everything.
he looked at you who kept stumbling on words.
miles spider sense went off and looked at the entrance, seeing the one guy who encourages your behaviour, “what - what did you tell them?” myles smirked and shrugged.
“i didn’t say anything, bro.” he placed his claws on your bed and sat down on it, “i am not your bro.” miles chuckled and sat down on your bean bag.
“um actually-“
“shut up.”
“cope.” you playfully stuck your tongue out at miles who smiled and rolled his eyes, god you loved his smile. i mean, what?
you don’t love them, boo, you hate them.
“dude, tell [name] that if i don’t catch the ‘hacker’ i’m gonna get my ass kicked.” miles and his brother made eye contact, “i hope you do.” myles replied with a playful tone.
miles threw his hands up, “you guys are actually evil.” you laughed at his comment, “we’re actually vigilantes.” myles pointed out, patting his brother’s shoulder (the bean bag literally beside your bed).
you smiled at the two with light pigment on your cheeks, “i really wanna kiss you guys—“ you paused your sentence with embarrassment, realizing you were saying your thoughts out loud.
the two paused and looked at you, blinking, “eso es adorable, amor—“ “get out.”
“¿qué dijiste, amor?”
“i hate you guys. kill yourselves. espero que te resbales y te caigas en tu próxima misión.” you rolled your eyes and buried your face into your hands as the two twins looked at eachother.
“you don’t mean that, amor.” you groaned at the nickname the two labelled you. it made you want to giggle, twirl your hair and kick your feet like a schoolgirl.
you blushed when you felt an arm sneak around your neck, hugging you against your chair with their head beside your ear, “te gustamos los dos, ¿verdad, amor?”
god, you couldn’t choose between the two.
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[name] when they keep getting teased and literally cannot deal with it.
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