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barnesafterglow · 3 days

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night shift

summary: your growing fame becomes too much for bucky

pairing: actor!bucky barnes x singer!reader

word count: 2k

warnings: fame au, dual pov, unreliable narrators, idk how the grammys work (clearly), angst angst angst, steve is a good friend, bucky is Going Thru It, if you think this is joe + taylor coded you're prob right, directly inspired by night shift by lucy dacus

a/n: yearly fic, dedicated to new lovers

masterlist - i no longer have a tag list but you can follow @theafterglowlibrary to get updates! 🤍

You shoved him off of you, heart racing, breaths coming fast. You had said Bucky’s name, had whispered it in your most intimate moment, and now you needed to leave.

You said nothing else, gathering up your clothes and pulling them on as quickly as you could.

“Wha-”

The door slammed behind you, cold winter winds whipping around you as you realized you’d left your jacket on the hook by the door. It was your favorite, but one you were okay sacrificing as long as you didn’t have to face your embarrassment anymore.

Huffing a breath you could see in front of your face, you called an Uber - at least you had remembered your phone - and paced anxiously a block away from his building, hoping and praying he wouldn’t follow you out.

The entire ride home your mind spiraled until you turned off your phone, terrified this would make headlines already and, let’s be honest, no one would be surprised if it did. You hated that was the life you lived. As if your breakup with Bucky hadn’t already been tabloid fodder for weeks now, the public speculating every detail and warping every comment and photo posted. You had taken to keeping off social media altogether in the time since, trying to disguise your outings as much as possible and take back alleys to recordings and friends’ houses.

Your biggest supporter through all of this, surprisingly, had been Steve - Bucky’s best friend. He hadn’t been your friend first, sure, but he had become like a brother to you nonetheless, and he knew the situation better than anyone. You knew he still talked to Bucky just the same and, while that stung a little, you couldn’t fault him for being there for his childhood best friend too.

Which is how you ended up outside his apartment the very next morning, clad in your typical-as-of-late attire of a hoodie and a hat and sunglasses. It was also how you came face to face with Bucky for the first time since that fateful night.

“I didn’t come to sit here and watch you stare at your feet, James.” You stood from his couch, starting to seethe with pent up anger from your gradually failing relationship, all to end up here. What did he want? To absolve his guilt and shake hands and everything would be fine?

No. You had been the victim of his petty remarks and anxious jealousy for so long. You wouldn’t let him think he deserved your time when he didn’t respect the person you had become.

Your anger flashed back to the week before, the last time you had been seen out in public together as he was breaking up with you at your favorite coffee shop, where he had paid for your drink and you gave him a hesitant kiss, even though you knew it was inevitably coming. He had led you to a table in the corner and proceeded to tell you that he was sorry but he couldn’t do this anymore, it was too much for him - you were too much for him. Okay. That’s all you said was “okay” before you pushed out of the chair and walked around the city until the sun went down.

By the time you got home that night, the headlines were already speculating your breakup, though neither of you had yet to shed a single tear.

Bucky blinked as you shuffled on Steve’s doorstep, eyes wide and contemplating the quickest escape. He didn’t blame you.

He had admittedly not handled your breakup the best; in fact, he regretted it almost immediately at the stricken look on your face, clearly not expecting it. He didn’t blame you for that, either, seeing as it had slipped out in a moment of panic.

You had gained a lot of fame over the course of your relationship, even more than him, and he didn’t quite know how to cope with it. And so the words had poured out, unable to be taken back, and here you were, weeks later, still at odds.

He thought every night of how to make it up to you. Public displays weren’t your thing and you had blocked his number the night of your big fight, so that was out of the question, and he didn’t fancy showing up to your house only to have the door slammed in his face either.

But now, now maybe that you were here on the most neutral ground you could stand on, maybe he could keep his foot out of his mouth and apologize. Words stirred in his hindsight, unable to string together a coherent sentence as your face morphed through the stages of grief in record time. Then, just as he was about to speak, Steve placed a hand on his shoulder and gently guided him back into the house. Relief flooded your face as you drifted out of his sight, and he realized this probably wasn’t going to be as easy to take back as he thought.

“Buck,” Steve said as the two of them turned around the corner. “You need to leave.”

Bucky felt his face do something awful, a mixture of confusion and guilt, but he decided to keep his mouth shut. He simply nodded and kept his head down as he shrugged on his jacket and passed by you in the doorway.

He could hear the soft sound of your sobs as the front door clicked shut.

Songwriting could be as easy as breathing and as hard as climbing a mountain. Right now, the words flooded out of you like a tap of water.

And so did the tears, staining your notebook paper and smearing ink, but still in your heart you knew you would never forget these lyrics - these words that so painstakingly came from your soul and laid it bare.

As you finished the last verse, you took a deep breath, sucked up the tears, and called Natasha.

“Steve, I need to talk to her,” Bucky whined over a beer in a rundown bar in Brooklyn.

“No, you don’t.”

“I can fix it, I know I can.”

“I don’t think you can, Buck.” Steve ran a hand through his hair, a deep sigh leaving his lips. “She’s trying to move on. Don’t ruin that for her.”

“But-”

“No.”

Bucky mimicked Steve’s sigh and leaned back in his chair. It had been increasingly hard to justify his decision to end things with you. He didn’t know what he was thinking and he regretted every moment of it since then.

“Do you think she misses me?” Bucky looked so hopeful, but he could see the sorrow in Steve’s eyes.

“I don’t know.”

The Grammys, the fucking Grammys, and you were performing. You were nominated for a couple, and the Academy had asked you to sing - preferably a new song - in honor of that.

Natasha wrapped you in a hug, twirled you around, and announced you were going out to celebrate. You hesitantly said yes, knowing the press would be everywhere and there was always the possibility of seeing Bucky.

But fuck him. This was your moment.

Which is how you ended up at your favorite dive bar in Brooklyn. Your first mistake.

It was your favorite because Bucky had taken you there so many times. But you couldn’t think of another place you would celebrate than the place where so much inspiration and so many lyrics had come from.

You didn’t scan the room as you walked in with your hand clutching Nat’s, the rest of your small circle of friends following close behind. Your second mistake.

Walking straight to the bar, you didn’t notice Bucky in the far corner, watching your every move. It wasn’t until you were a few drinks in, feeling the celebration kick in, that you spotted him.

At first, you intended to ignore him. This was your time, your night, your moment. He didn’t get the spoil that.

That is, until you went to the bathroom and he trailed you into the dimly lit hallway.

“Baby,” he whispered, his voice a harsh rasp of beer and no sleep. “I’ve missed you.”

Your heart stopped beating in your chest.

You weren’t prepared to see him tonight, not that you ever were these days. But tonight of all nights, the one that should have been carefree and fun and a glittery memory for years to come, was smeared with anger and heartbreak as you spun to face him.

“What the fuck,” you snapped as his fingers grazed your bare arm. Immediately you felt bad, seeing the hurt on his face, and your expression softened. “Sorry.”

“I-it’s okay.” The catch in his voice broke your heart, your own watery eyes matching his. For just a moment.

It took you too long to come to your senses - this was the man who had shattered your heart without a second thought - but he was already so close to you. His body only inches from your own, his hot breath fanning your face, and goddamnit you missed him. You missed him so much that your heart broke all over again.

Your mind cycled through a thousand different thoughts all at once: get away, come closer, touch me, keep your hands off. You couldn’t decide what you wanted in the moment.

You were so, so angry, and yet you couldn’t stop yourself from reaching out to him. His hands settled on your waist as the lights overhead flickered. Your hand pressed gently to his cheek, completely of its own volition. Suddenly, you were tracing the planes of the face you had once known so well. He looked older now, like your time apart had aged him, yet his was still as handsome as the day you had first laid eyes on him.

His eyes locked with yours, and neither of you said a word - not him to ask, not you to stop him - as he leaned in to kiss you.

It should have felt like a victory - it did feel like a victory - but there was something else there. Something dark and twisted and Bucky couldn’t figure out if it was coming from you or him.

The kiss could have lasted moments or a lifetime, he didn’t really know. All he knew was one second you were holding him close to you and the next you were shoving him off.

“Fuck fuck fuck,” your voice came out in a whisper, like you didn’t want to draw attention from the steadily growing crowd of the bar. He supposed you didn’t.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” You nodded at his words, your fingers pressed to your lips like you could still feel him there. “I’ll just go.”

You nodded again, your eyes vacant, and he made his way back to the main room of the bar. He looked back in time to see you slump against the wall, and he knew that you were thinking of a way to erase any trace of him on you.

The stage lights came on, you strummed your guitar and started to sing.

The first time I tasted somebody else’s spit, I had a coughing fit.

You let the lyrics you poured your heart into spill out across the stage. Still, somehow - in the crowd of hundreds of faces - you spotted Bucky.

This time, it didn’t make your heart clench. Didn’t make you shed a tear or run away.

No. This time, it empowered you. Let him hear the lyrics he inspired. Let him feel that pain of your words and feel the hole in your heart where he had broken it. Where you were now healing.

Bucky watched as you sang, and you were mesmerizing. He could feel the echoes of hurt in your words, the hole in your heart he had put there. He knew, despite the last time he saw you, that there was no making up. There was no fixing what was well beyond broken. No chance for him.

In five years I hope the songs feel like covers,

Dedicated to new lovers.

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leohnoz · 2 days

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Who are you, count?

"The masks have fallen; you cant get enough? Yet this is still not the finale!"

For @aphidclan-clangen again—

Process video/other stuff under the cut!

WHO ARE YOU, COUNT? Count: Paradiseskies Valentine: Lilacpaw Albert: Spiderglade Theif: Pearlstar Diamond: Blisswhistle

Lines / Sketch

Process video [Flashing, bright colors, eyestrain]

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fruity-m0nster · 3 months

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"No one (else) said they were afraid of love as beautifully as you"

#my art #digital art #bloodweave #astarion #gale dekarios #song inspired #bg3 fanart

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maranigai · 6 months

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My fav band released new album, so it's time for song-inspired angsty drawings with certain fiery deities.

#my art #dark souls #gwyn lord of cinder #manus father of the abyss #furtive pygmy #song inspired #I love these destructive idiots so much

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artisticallygay · 1 year

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"A moment in time to reconcile Came a little too late, and now it’s gone A moment in history Produced by the broken and thrown away"

"And I’m already here For you to see, for you to see, to see you I’ve always been here For you to see, for you to see, to see you"

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saytr · 5 months

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youtube

#miraculous ladybug #doodle #miraculous fanart #doodles #mlb #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #emoadrinette #adrienette #adrinette #paris special #ml paris special #miraculous #alternative universe #emo marinette #emo adrien #song inspired

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grimesgirll · 5 days

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they shake their heads sayin’, “god, help her” when I tell ’em he’s my man

i can fix him (no really i can) - taylor swift

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tmntxthings · 9 months

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一∑ Not Enough・゜・。

author’s note: i feel pretty meh about this but we posting anywayssss c: thank joji for this ! here’s to heartbreak and betrayal~~~

warnings: cursing, hurt + no comfort, angst to the max, unedited

word association: first love, relationships, broken trust, loneliness, betrayal, self-deprecation, doubt, emotional breakdowns

song inspired: “ Ew by Joji ”

—————————————————————————

First love.

Not a crush. Not a like. Those don’t come close. Those can’t compare. To the all-encompassing feeling that is love. Especially the first.

If Donatello had been aware of what would happen. Of the impact that it would leave. In this moment, he would say it is not worth it.

You…

His teeth bared at just the thought. He couldn’t think of you for one moment without a searing pain lancing through his entire being. Making his teeth ache and he found he was curling into himself. He straightened once he realized what he was doing.

Sitting wasn’t helping. He stood. Maybe going back to pacing would help. Help him to finally think. His eyes were to the floor. Watching his feet march a couple of paces here. Only to stop when he saw debris on the floor and to turn back the way he came.

Pacing.

He tried once more.

You… you’re.. his everything. His first real crush. His first kiss. His first love.

Of course the beginning with you had been a cliche, he had saved you. But that was one of the only ways he came into contact with humans. Maybe that’s what you had fallen in love with, a ‘hero.’ He was anything but that. He hardly felt up to par with his brothers. They were naturals. Wielding their mystic powers with ease while it was still a struggle for Donnie. But maybe that one heroic moment with him had been the reason why you fell so hard and so fast for him.

You had taught him a lot. He was never a vocal person. Not when it came to his emotions. You taught him to communicate better, better than Mikey had been able to. So much so that he had been able to confess a deep emotion like love to you. And you’d accepted him. Loved him back. For a time everything was great. You were around all the time. Nothing else seemed to really matter to Donnie. You were his world and he just circled around it. You continued to be his first for a lot of things. Time continued to pass by and his feelings for you never faded. They only grew stronger and that bond between the two of you would last forever.

Except.

It didn’t.

Unbeknownst to Donnie, your feelings had faded.

His pacing stopped. His eyes drilling holes into the ground before he forced his head to turn to his monitor. Ignoring the rest of the wreck. His heart started to race, in a sickening way that made him feel dizzy. He was looking at a you. His monitor held you.

And someone else. He felt sick as he forced himself to stare. The adoration pouring from your gaze as you held onto this..this stranger! His stomach rolled as he remembered what came after. What not even he could force himself to look at for a second time.

When you had said you “needed a break.” Donnie had thought it was because of school. That’s how you had made it sound. That you were stressed. You needed time alone. It had never sounded like a break up. In fact a kiss was shared between you two before you had left the lair that day. Reassuring him that everything was fine. That you weren’t leaving him. That you loved him more than anything. That this was just for you, and your health.

Donnie had distracted himself to not text you as much. To not call you as much. He still sought after you on social media though. He checked your location from time to time just to keep him from being restless with worry. It was especially hard when the days apart started to add up.

So when you had told him school was out for the summer…that you were out celebrating with friends.. he couldn’t stop himself. He just had to see you. Even if it was just for a moment. He’d tracked your location to some club. Had gotten on the roof to see that no you weren’t inside the building but on the side. Without even thinking Donnie had moved to the edge, moments from jumping down to make a grand entrance in front of you. Not thinking about the what-ifs of getting caught by other humans. He wanted to surprise you. To see that lovely smile light up your face as you took him in, maybe if he was lucky he’d get a kiss. He’d take anything you would give him.

The only thing that stopped him from jumping down was hearing your voice squeal someone else’s name.

Even then, Donnie hadn’t thought anything of it, just a change of plans, to not drop down but to text you saying ‘I’m here!’ or ‘Look up!’ or ‘Hang back for a minute.’

Then he looked over the edge and saw you pressed against the brick wall of the building he was on top of. Looking into the eyes of another with excitement, with anticipation, with love.

And kissing the stranger. Again. And again. And again. Over. And over. And over again.

He had staggered back. Shaking from head to toe as he tore off into the sky. Running away. Flying straight back home to ruin everything in his path. Mainly his lab. And when he could finally piece together two thoughts that weren’t to destroy shit. He already had the recording set up on his monitor. Paused on that look on your face.

He had fled the scene but as always he recorded everything. He couldn’t press play… he couldn’t. This image alone was painfully enough. In fact he had to turn away. Staggering back to his lone chair. It was one of the few things that survived his wrath.

“Fuck.” He croaked as he slumped over, elbows on his knees as his palms pressed into his eyes. Why was this happening? What had he done? You loved another?? He wasn’t enough??? Why had he thought he ever would be? What he didn’t understand was why you even bothered in the first place if this was to be the outcome.

Why had you taught him all of those things?

To love.

Pointless. It was all unbearably pointless.

Hadn’t he become someone more worthy? Now that he knew how to communicate properly and not shut down? To not crawl into his lab and sulk for weeks without speaking his mind? Why? Why. Why??? Why was he still not enough?

For some reason he had thought that love was unconditional. Undying. But it was a fickle thing. Something he now knew he couldn’t rely on. He would never make the same mistake again.

His eyes started to burn and he pressed the heels of his palms into them harder. He didn’t want this. If this was what he got for loving someone as much as he had loved you, he didn’t want it. It hurt. His breathing quickened, no matter how hard he pressed, tears leaked out, wetting his hands as he held back sobs. No. No. No.

And before he knew it the mantra couldn’t overpower his pathetic whimpers. Then it grew louder, more convulsive as the sobs turned to howls. This was worse than any physical pain. How would he be able to fix this. Was there a cure? He didn’t want to feel anything anymore.

After crying until he couldn’t anymore, slowly he straightened in his seat. His tear ducts ached, the stains on his face burned, but it didn’t matter. He had cried so much, for so long, he was sure he would never do it again. Donnie stood, taking in the entirety of his lab. He’d have to clean up first. Then he could work on something. Anything. That would help. It always did. His wrist-tech vibrated, along with his monitor changing screens to show an incoming call from you.

He swiped it away.

He knew what a ‘break’ meant now. He didn’t need to hear you. He didn’t need your confirmation nor consolation. He didn’t need closure. He had lived without you before. He surely could do it again.

He fought against the pain that rushed forward. No he wouldn’t feel anything. He didn’t need you. It was all a sham. Another weakness that he couldn’t afford. He’d forget about this. About you. And he was sure one day he could convince himself this was all some stupid fever dream that he had made up to pass the time.

It would be like you never even existed.

Though it would never conceal the fact that he felt deficient. That he was lacking. That he was someone inadequate to love.

Deep down in the marrow of his bones he would always feel like he was never enough.

—————————————————————————

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achaoticeternal · 1 year

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civility.

AEMOND TARGARYEN X FEM!READER

summary: since your shared childhood, aemond and you have always shared a close bond. word count: 2.4k warnings: canon typical language and violence. bullying. a/n: this is a fem!reader who is a noble lady and ward of the Queen. reader is Otto’s niece/ Alicent’s cousin so you could also imagine this with a Hightower!Reader. this was inspired from the song seven by taylor swift. i love both soft and mean aemond, you can try and pry him from my hands

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

The library was strangely silent today. It was always silent, apart from the rustling of pages and the occasional whisper. Yet, today it was a weird difference.

Helaena sat to your right, reading over a field journal she had found about arachnids. Though you despised seeing the pictures of the spiders and scorpions, you knew they delighted the young princess. Currently, nothing in the gardens or the maester’s study had intrigued her as much as the eight-legged fiends did.

In front of you was a book that briefly talked over the history of the Reach, most fondly writing about Oldtown, your home. With Lord Otto being your uncle, his daughter, the Dowager Queen, now took you in as her ward so that you would be raised in proper society. It had been a high honor to live and be educated amongst the royal family.

Typically, you were an avid reader, being able to finish such a short novel in less than an hour. But the lack of a certain prince’s presence left you feeling uneasy…

However, the door to the library opened to reveal Aemond with his mother at his side. Both of them looked upset, yet it was Aemond who was crying. Clearly, something had set him off from his usually soft demeanor.

“Aemond!” You announced and moved quickly to talk with him.

As you approached him and the Queen, you curtsied before comforting your friend, “What has upset you, my prince?”

Aemond scrunched his nose, the light freckles of his face moving too, “My brother… my nephews… I hate them.”

“Aemond, we do not say such things,” the Queen corrected her son, before dismissing herself to attend to Helaena.

Your eyes followed her until you were convinced that she could no longer hear the pair of you whisper to each other, “What happened? What did they do to you?”

Aemond shook his head at first, not wanting to relive the moment. But he did want to tell you because you always knew how to comfort him. You were a far better friend than any of his family or the sons of the nobles that visited the capital.

“They said that the dragon masters had found an unclaimed dragon. A dragon that I could bond with and fulfill my destiny to be a dragon rider,” Aemond’s lip shook as he spoke, “But they gave me a pig! A pig with wings!”

As soon as you noticed the crack in his voice, you threw your arms around him, pulling the prince into a tight hug. You did not say anything to him… simply allowing him to forget about the incident.

“Their words do not matter, because they are only words. You are the finest among them,” You softly attempted to console your friend, “You have studied and trained much more than any of them. One day, you shall have a dragon, a great dragon.”

“What if I don’t? What if I never become a dragon rider?”

His vulnerability made your chest ache for him. You wished that others could see Aemond as you saw him. Gently, you rested your hands against his forearms, “You are a prince… And even if they are foolish enough to ignore that. My loyalty and friendship are vowed only to you — you are my prince…”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

With the matter of Driftmark now settled, the entirety of the Targaryen family was gathered in a private dining room for a feast. It had been many years since everyone was together for a meal, so you understood why the King had wished for such. It left you to now sit between your uncle, the Hand, and your prince, Aemond.

Currently, everyone was laughing or paying tribute to other members of the family. It was heartwarming to see the royal family coming together and actually enjoying themselves.

Yet, Aemond sat by your side, clutching his goblet. He only laughed at some of the snide comments that Aegon made, occasionally acknowledging the jokes from his uncle Daemon as well. You reached out a hand to playfully snatch the pitcher of wine that sat in front of his plate.

“Refilling your chalice again, my lady?” Aemond questioned you.

“It has been quite the day, my prince,” You giggled to yourself, “Indulging myself for a night might do me some good.”

As you lifted the chalice to your lips, your eyes made contact with his violet one. With a smirk, you began to sip the red liquid while maintaining his gaze. It was only when you lowered the cup that Aemond’s gaze flickered to your lips, now stained red from the wine.

“Do you ever wish to indulge yourself, my prince?”

Both you and Aemond knew there was a deeper meaning to your words. However, Jace suddenly stood to his full height while Aegon continued his torment. At this action, Aemond also quickly stood, eyeing Jace as if he wanted the young prince to act out of fashion.

Instead, Jace made a toast to his uncles — a toast to their shared youth. Then Jace lead Helaena to dance, which was far more innocent than his mocking tribute.

You immediately noticed the shift in Aemond’s disposition from the tribute. His jaw clenched, defining his side profile; while his knuckles began to turn white from his grip on his napkin. Gently, you rested your hand atop his, soothing the skin with your thumb.

“Ignore him,” You attempted to console him, “They only mean to anger you. Do not allow them the pleasure of seeing you so upset…”

A chuckle sounded from across the table. It came from Lucerys, as the servants placed a pig at your end from the table. Aemond’s eye flickered from his nephew to the pig and finally to the chalice.

Aemond slammed his fist on the table as he stood, raising his chalice, “Final tribute.”

You glanced up at him, silently begging that he control his anger. He looked down at you, but looked back to Aegon with a smirk, “To the health of my nephews… Jace… Luke… Joffrey…”

Tension quickly began to fill the room, drowning everyone under its waves. A part of you prayed to the Seven that Aemond would just bite his tongue this once. That he would sit down and have a laugh with you or ask to be excused for the evening.

But Aemond continued on with his tribute, “Each of them handsome, wise… strong”

The devilish smirk played at his lips, and while you usually enjoyed seeing Aemond like this, you wished for such torment to end.

“Come, let us drain our cups to these three strong boys—”

“I dare you to say that again,” Jace spoke heatedly from his spot next to Helaena. Both Alicent and Rhaenyra attempted to cut in and silence their children, only for the boys to speak over them.

“Why?” Aemond crossed away from his seat, standing rather proudly, “Twas only a compliment. Do you not think yourself strong?”

Before another word could be said, Jace viciously approached his uncle and delivered a right hook to his jaw. Only Aemond’s head turned, and not a drop of wine spilled from his goblet, still in hand. The sudden fight caused a great commotion to come from yourself and others.

The next thing you saw was Aegon pinning Luke to the table, and Aemond easily shoving Jace to the floor. The Queen yelped at her sons to quit, as guards seized the younger boys.

“Aemond!” You spoke crossly, grabbing his arm.

The Queen moved to his opposite side, glaring up at her son, “Why would you say such a thing before these people?”

“I was merely expressing how proud I am of my family, Mother,” His gaze looked from his mother to you, as he tugged his arm out of your grip, “Though it seems my nephews aren’t quite as proud of theirs.”

Daemon quickly stepped in between his nephews and his stepsons, glaring between both groups. As Rhaenyra bid her sons and their betrothed to go back to their chambers, Daemon turned to meet Aemond’s glare. A sigh escaped Daemon as everyone else in the room awaited for something to occur.

It surprised you, how similar Aemond was to his uncle. You wondered to yourself if the Rogue Prince was once as strikingly handsome as Aemond was. Of course, you had heard the stories, but it was hard to imagine anyone being more handsome than your friend and prince.

“To your rooms,” Alicent looked between all of her children and you, “Now!”

A moment later, Aemond looked to the door and began making his exit. Swiftly, you curtsied to the remaining members of the royal family before fleeing after the prince. It would be better to calm him now than allow his rampage to continue.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“What desire filled you to act like such a cunt?”

“I simply complimented my nephews-”

“You know what you said, what you implied… do you wish for your father to have your?” Your brows furrowed as he crossed away from you, “or for your uncle to take your head like he did Vaemond’s? You can not be so childish!”

Aemond moved away from you, his anger wishing to get the best of him. Even if his nephews had upset him so, you could not justify such words and actions after the King’s departure from dinner this evening. You stood diligently, waiting for an apology or even a plain response.

“Childish?” Aemond straightened his posture as he spoke, “Childish?”

Finally, the blonde-haired prince spun around to face you. His jaw clenched, just like his fist. You could see all the rage, the desire to scream at you, his eye glaring at you while reflecting every emotion that whirled inside him.

“Childish, that is your claim? Hmm?” Aemond sneered, “Childish is what I would call Aegon as he continues his drunken vices or the lords of the court who think silly words and flowers to tempt you into a marriage. No, childish is something I would call my bastard nephew, Lucerys, while he laughs at a pig being placed in front of me at supper tonight!”

Just as a tear escaped from his violet eye, Aemond turned away from you. You could tell from the tension in his neck that he despised sharing such thoughts with you.

“I… I understand what—”

“No, you don’t understand!” He shoved your hand off his arm, “You are a fine lady of the courts, I am a Targaryen Prince! A prince that no one in this damn family seems to respect.”

With a sigh, you began to approach him again… You were much softer and gentler with your tone and movements. At first, you placed a hand at the top of his back, rubbing simple circles to comfort him. Once the tension left his back, you tucked your arms around his waist, hugging yourself close to his frame.

“I respect you, my prince.”

Immediately, your words began to calm him, his breath evened out into fuller breaths. Then, you took your cue to continue to calm his spirit. “You are a Targaryen Prince, the most accomplished of them all. You ride the largest dragon. You have trained both mentally and physically to be the best of them. And if they don’t care about that,” You removed yourself from him and moved to stand before him. You gently intertwined your fingers as you gazed up at him loving you, “I care about it. You have my respect, you are my prince…”

Aemond’s hands squeezed tighter at your words. Though his demeanor had not shifted, you could tell that your words had affected him. He thought for a moment more, nodding as if agreeing with him.

“You have always been loyal to me,” His brow raised, “Why?”

You bit your lip in contemplation. There were many ways to answer the prince’s question. With a sigh, you began to answer him, “Since we were children, I could see your potential. Your very being exudes a type of power that Aegon nor your nephews will ever have. You are the best of them, and I have always seen that. You deserve the world and more in my eyes.”

Aemond was silent, and only a hum of contemplation showed that he had even acknowledged what you had said. Then he dropped your hands, his brow furrowing. You took this as a sign of dismissal. It was understandable that he would like to spend the rest of the evening alone.

Your steps were light as you made your way to the door. The tension from earlier has dissipated and allowed the natural sway of your gait to return. As you approached the exit to the chambers, you were stopped.

“My lady?”

At his request, you turned to face the man, “Yes, my prince?”

“Exactly how long have you known me?”

“Since we were… seven? Whenever Queen Alicent requested that I serve as her ward.”

“And how long have you been in love with me?”

Suddenly, all breath abandoned your body. Your jaw dropped in shock at his statement and a wave of nerve brushed over you. All words and movement were lost upon you, so you stayed frozen in time.

Aemond, however, seemed quite amused at your shock. His typical cool and devilish manner had returned to him as he began to stalk toward you. A smirk played at his lips as he continued his teasing, “I apologize, did you not hear me well enough?”

“Huh…” You pressed your back to the door, “I-I’m afraid I don’t understand the sentiment behind your question…”

“It is a rather simple question though,” Aemond rebutted, “How long have you been in love with me?”

A few quick strides later, Aemond stood before you, leaving no escape from his gaze. He would get an answer, one way or another, “My lady, did you think your affections would go unnoticed by me? By my mother?”

“I… I…” A blush crept over your face. How you wished to cower away and into your private chambers, wishing the conversation had never made the shocking turn.

“Speechless, are we?” Aemond smirked, dipping his head to your height, “I hope you are not so speechless when I ask your Lord Father to take you as my wife.”

At his words, your heartbeat increased once more, confusion evident on your face, “Wife?”

“Ah, she speaks…” Aemond tutted, raising a hand to cup your jaw as he admired your features, “Yes… my wife… I assume that you would enjoy such. Of course, you can still continue to prattle and dote on me as you do now.”

A giggle slipped past you at his teasing words. Finally, the realization of it settled in, “Is that eagerness, my prince? If it was, I would think you quite enjoy, if not even desire my affections.”

“That I do,” He chuckled to himself as his nose brushed against yours, “I desire you, the object of all my affections.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

please like, reblog, and/or comment if you enjoyed and would like to see more aemond or hotd content.

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leavemeslowly · 1 month

Text

III. queen of peace

Pairing: Susie Glass x Edward Horniman

TV show: The Gentlemen (2024)

word count: 1472

warnings: angst, alcohol consumption, not-super-graphic smut, love/hate? relationship

„The queen of peace

Always does her best to please

Is it any use?

Somebody’s gotta lose"

Susie and Eddie become partners, tell each other some dark truths and well… Susie listens to him against her better judgement.

Susie and Eddie stumbled into his office, laughing about something that Freddie shouted after them when they left the party happening in the living room.

Eddie closed the doors behind them and moved to the front of his desk where he hid a certain document. He handed Susie a blue fountain pen and asked her to sign. Naturally, not with her real signature because that could prove their professional relationship to the authorities. She signed with a doodle of a gun. He then drew a middle finger next to it. Their deal was done. They were in business, together.

„So, now we are equals?”, Eddie asked after he put the document inside of a safe hidden behind one of many paintings purchased by his father. Susie smiled enigmatically.

„Ta, I suppose we are. I will miss giving you orders."

"I am sure you will continue giving them anyway.” Eddie moved to a mini bar and poured them drinks. She smiled at him, thinking that he was probably right. Susie also knew that he will be more than happy to take them.

“Any plans what you want to do first?” She asked when he gave her a full glass.

“No”, She lifted her eyebrows. “I mean I do, but not today. Anyone ever told you, you are a workaholic?”

That is why she appreciated his companionship. He wasn’t afraid to challenge her and say it as it was.

“No.” Her expression changed to a more serious one. "Everyone else is too scared to tell me the truth."

“I am not afraid of you.” He searched for her eyes and his voice softened as if there was another dimension to his words. „I know what you are capable of when I pushed you. I have learnt my lesson.”

Susie sat in an armchair behind his desk and looked very pleased with herself taking his place.

„When I told Gospel the truth about his brother what led to his visit on your estate, I did it because you lied to me. I was angry at you, Eddie. It was personal. Don’t betray me again.”

Eddie nodded and moved closer to her. He leaned on his desk when looking down on her and not knowing how to respond to her confession. Admittedly, he was surprised by it. She sounded hurt rather than angry but he didn’t pointed that out aloud.

„I told Johnston, back when I still considered his support that I do not want any of your family members hurt. Of course, you too, Susie.” He paused to catch her eye and ensure she understands. „I don’t want to fight.” She looked up and met his eyes with openness he wasn’t prepared for.

„Is there anything you want then?”

„You know I want a lot of things.” He answered vaguely but not without understanding the hints she was dropping. „And it is all your fault.”

„Oh, really? I don’t think it is, Edward. I think you have always wanted it all. Military, this whole protector of your family act were meant to conceal your ambition. You don’t have to hide from me. We have already showed each other our darkest colours.”

Eddie was blindsided by her words that caused all of his pretences to tumble and crush into pieces. She stripped him of his defences with few punctuated words. Susie knew it and couldn’t contain her smirk of satisfaction.

“Always so smug, aren’t you?” Eddie countered gracelessly. She rolled her eyes and raised from her seat. Her words were the first loud declaration of his deepest and most sinister thoughts. “You don’t what to hear what I have to say?”

“No, not particularly.”

Eddie knew better so raised to his height and looked down on her. Her perfume lingered around him and the truth was he was under her spell not other way around. Nevertheless, he will try to even out the odds.

“You have it all, right? You are immaculate in protecting your empire but not for yourself, not really. For your brother, your father. You have a fucked up notion of obligation from which you can’t free yourself. You should want something just for you, Susie. Something substantial because I know you are not easily satisfied. Is there anything you would want? Anything I can give you, perhaps?”

Susie’s expression changed but she still was almost rigid. She had her head slightly tilted so she could gaze on his face. Finally, she slowly leaned in. Her hand landed on his lapel.

“You have no idea what you are asking for.”

He inched closer to her face and slowly, testing the waters, placed his hand on her cheek. Susie shivered at his touch, probably because of a coldness of his signet. Her eyelashes fluttered when she felt his breath on her lips. Eddie wanted to ruin her perfectly painted red lipstick which tempted him so many times before. He knew it will happen but the wait was crushing.

“Come on, Susie, tell me. What is that you want?” He caressed her cheek trying to encourage her to relax. “Should I give you an idea?”

He noticed the way her throat bobbed trying to mute any unwanted sounds. It was satisfying, going exactly in the direction he imagined.

“You should just kiss me, Edward, and stop teasing. For your own good.” Susie regained her old self and an ounce of self-composure.

Her words were like a sound of a gun being fired. Eddie crushed his lips to her. She immediately responded with need he didn’t anticipate. Still, her taste, her small noises were like magic. Until this moment, he didn’t realise how much he missed closeness and simplicity of a touch. This need was pathetic. He called out Susie on her weaknesses but he wasn’t better when he turned them around and pinned her to his desk and manoeuvred her to sit on it.

„You do justice to your family name, Eddie” Susie mumbled between their kisses. If he could, he would roll his eyes but just laughed, too busy kissing down her throat. Her fingers slipped into his hair, tugging it and he could not contain his moan. „So you like it like that? Not so tough anymore."

„You are talking too much, Susan.” Eddie raised his gaze to her stormy eyes. She slowly smiled but could not conceal desire looming there.

Her fingers slowly circled his tie and pulled it forcing him to kiss her again, but slower, according to her own want. She took it off and untucked first buttons of his shirt. Eddie's hands roamed over her back, then down her things and back up under he vest. Suddenly, she almost sobbed into his mouth. He discovered she wasn’t wearing anything under it so his cold fingers came into contact with her bare skin.

Her jacket dropped to the floor next. Before she could react, Eddie was moving her to stand in front of him and brace her palms on the desk. He wanted to evaporate her thoughts, end her worries and let her finally relax. He pressed himself to her back and she moaned feeling him tall and unyielding.

It was right how she fitted between his arms, almost a head lower and staring up into his eyes. Her own were glazed with pure want that if necessary would send Eddie to another war. He touched her jaw to draw her to him and kiss her thoroughly while his other hand embraced hers. Their fingers intertwined and she gasped when his hand slid down her throat to slowly embrace her breast and pleasure her with his touch. He observed her opened mouth and small cries she let out.

„Eddie, it is too much.”

„So do you know now what you want?” He was teasing but he needed her to voice her desires. Perhaps, it was not strictly necessary knowing his own desperate craving but he wanted her to have it burned in her memory. That it was her own decision to fuck him and let him close enough to see her vulnerability. He did not want regrets and another cause for war.

„Eddie...” She didn’t want to admit it aloud. Still, she tried to express it when he forced her to look at him and saw her eyelids half closed and felt her slow grinding against him.

„Say it, Susie, God, please say it.” He was slowly losing a fight he began when she on the other hand was regaining control. It was her turn to foreshadow all the things she could do to him. Against his better judgement, he clutched her thigh and finally pushed into her ass. Not expecting that, she abruptly tilted her head back onto his arm and thrusted back with more fierceness.

„Yes, Eddie, yes, do your worst."

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blossom-works · 7 months

Text

"Only You and I Exist"

Inspired by the song "Exist" by Eric Nam. I went to his concert (House on a Hill tour) and I fell in love with this song.

For as long as Leon has known, he has always been alone. His family got themselves killed because they dabbled in crime, and everyone he got close with dies or goes their separate ways. Stability is foreign to him. Leon never voices this because he does not want to sound like a wimp. People have gone through the same shit he has, so who is he to complain?

Getting calls from the DSO and going somewhere in the world for an unknown amount of time is Leon's life. It has been since he saved Ashely in the remote, Spanish village. After completing a mission, Leon would either drown himself in alcohol or silence. Sometimes both. To himself, Leon is a speck of dust flying through the wind. No direction in life. Just lost in the neverending gust of wind.

Leon longed for stability. He longed for someone to pull him out of the life of uncertainty and pain. He wanted someone who could understand him. Leon wanted someone to ground him when the wind blew too hard...Then you came along.

You became Leon's anchor when the missions and responsibilities were about to push Leon over the edge. You two met on a DSO mission as partners. You know those scenes in movies or books where two people are at their lowest and they share their stores, and next thing you know they leave closer than before? Yeah, that happened to you and Leon. He wishes that you two met in better circumstances, but you told him that all that matters is what is in front of you.

You knew about the baggage Leon carries and he knows about yours. It was hard for the two of you to get over your trauma, still is. Leon was scared at how easy it was to love you. He knew what love was but something like this? So consuming? Is that what love is? If it is then Leon wants it to stay that way. He wants you to hold him when the wind blows too hard, and it is scary.

What if, like everyone else, you leave Leon alone? That the two of you were never meant to be so the world will eventually take you from him. A blip. Whenever Leon feels like this, you hold him in your hands and tell him, "We're in this together." Pulling him from his dark thoughts. You let him know that loving each other is worth the risk. When you two are together, you should forget about the unforgiving world outside and bask in each other's love.

So, here he is. At a concert that you wanted to go to because Leon did not want you to go alone. He knows that you can handle yourself, you have proven that more than once but it is Leon's job to protect you. In exchange for the love you give him, Leon will protect you with his life. When the artist starts to sing one specific song, it reminds Leon of you and your relationship.

You managed to get two floor tickets and you got to the venue a little late so you are standing on the outside of the crowd. Leon pulls you towards him, a few steps away from everyone, and holds you against him.

"Hold, hold me in your hands I'm just a speck of sand Lost in the wind 'Til I catch your drift Spinning me in circles, oh It's easy to dismiss As if we're just a blip Put it on the line Just for tonight Only you and I exist"

Dancing to lyrics, you and Leon are in your own world. No one else is in that venue but the two of you. So close Leon holds you and you can feel his heartbeat. Your bodies sway in small circles to the rhythm of the melody.

"Why do we fear what we could have When it gets good we always run away? Scared that wе might repeat the past Fallin' in lovе should never feel this way"

Leon refuses to go back to his way of life. The dark and unknowing life he lived. A mentally and physically draining life he lived. He was a fool to be scared to open himself to you, to let you hold his heart in your hands because you take so good care of it. You cradle his heart like a precious jewel. Leon knows that there will be times when either one of you will bury yourselves in the darkness again, but it is okay. You have each other. Love is scary but it is so worth it, Leon learned. The stability and intimate connection Leon has longed for is finally found, and he will never let you go. Not to anyone or the world itself.

"Only you and I exist"

#x reader #resident evil #reader insert #leon kennedy x reader #resident evil 2 #resident evil 4 #resident evil 6 #resident evil vendetta #resident evil death island #resident evil infinite darkness #re 4 remake #re2 remake #leon s kennedy #leon kennedy imagine #resident evil imagine #resident evil x reader #fanfiction #song inspired

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spencerrxids · 2 years

Text

memories

pairing : sparrow!ben hargreeves x fem!reader, past!umbrella!ben hargreeves x fem!reader

genre : angst, heartwarming, hurt-comfort

warning : prepare your tissue if you’re attached to umbrella!ben ig

summary : in which she found glimpse of them together through his eyes—the man that wore the face of the love of her life

wordcount : 3k

a/n : inspired by the song glimpse of us by joji. and i am aware that there are a lot of stories especially these days. If there are resemblance between this story with others then that is completely out of my control. great minds thinks alike after all. requested by @torchioethan i’ll try my best to interpreted the song to their relationship. the story is up to your interpretation by the way. on my remus lupin angst i wrote “some endings are meant to he interpreted differently.” also do you think this is ooc for sparrow!ben? cause this is what i think he’ll act like in this situation. also i put some addie larue reference in this iykyk

masterlist

Have you ever lost someone and then you just feel like you see that someone everywhere? Every place, every street, everyone, reminds you of the memories you hold dearly close to your heart no matter how hurt it is to remember for you refuse to ever forget about it. It hurts so much it does, but that’s the price you have to pay.

The first time she saw him again after going back from the 60s with the dysfunctional bunch of siblings, she thought she was dreaming. Perhaps, it’ll be easier if it were just a dream. Cause now she has to look at the face—at the body of someone who once had loved her and found nothing. A stranger with the face of the love of her life.

Same name. Same face. Different memories.

But does it all even matter now? The world is ending in hours. She could meet her Ben again, that only if he really does exist. She has never been the one to fully understand the concept of time and Five doesn’t speak in a language that she is capable of understanding.

She raised her glass of champagne in Luther’s direction as he danced with his newfound love before averting her gaze to take a look around the room. Diego and Lila being in each other's arms. Klaus being Klaus. Five who seem to be enjoying his time with the number of empty glasses on his table. And lastly, him. Sitting on the table far back from everybody else, drinking quietly as his eyes, too, roamed around the room. Even from a distance between the two, she could tell that he was judging all of them silently.

Slowly she rose and walked toward him with her glass wrapped around her fingers. Once she arrived at the spot, she gestured to the seat next to him. “May I?” Without hearing any response from him, she sat herself on the seat, putting her glass on the table. “The party is over there yet you distance yourself from the others, emo boy.”

He rolled his eyes at the nickname she gave him. “If anyone here is emo that would be your brother. All brooding, laying down alone in my room, wearing nothing but black.” He looked over at Viktor and she followed his line of gaze. “First, Viktor isn’t emo, and second, you just prove my point here.” She gestured to his situation right now. “You just described yourself.”

The look in his eyes was nothing like her Ben as he glared at her, glass tightly wrapped around his fingers. “Look, if you’re going here just to brag about your oh-so-perfect Ben. The others had took their chance every time they passed me so don’t even bother.” He leaned forwards to her—trying to somewhat looking intimidating as she looks at him, totally unfazed by it.

“No.” She leaned closer to him as he leaned back, clicking her glass with his. “That is a too sensitive topic for me to talk about. Actually, I was trying to give you some company.”

“Well, I don’t need your company.” He talked back.

She leaned her back on the seat. “Too bad. I’m already comfortable sitting here.”

“Then I’ll just go away from here.” He got up, looking at her irritatingly, clearly annoyed by her presence. Turning around he began to walked away from the girl that has been haunting his mind, but then she said something that made him stop. “You know you don’t want to, Ben. You wished to stay here. You want someone to tell you to stay. So here I am doing you a favor by saying this.”

Walking back towards her, he pointed his finger right in front of her face, a look of exasperation plastered on his face. “You stay out of my head. Don’t even try to use it on me.” He said. “You think you know me. You know nothing about me. Nothing. I don’t need your company and I most certainly don’t need your pity. I don’t need you.”

Her gaze softened at his words, his last words may hurt a part of her but it was nothing she hadn’t heard before. “I don’t need my powers to know what you’re thinking, Ben. Besides, it never works on you. Not on you. Not on any version of you, I suppose.” She looks back to her glass, avoiding his gaze before feeling him walking away from her.

***

Looking at Luther and Sloane, she offered them a large smile. “I’m happy for the both of you. Wish we could have more time to know each other, Sloane.” She said, eyes falling onto the girl that is wrapped around Luther’s arms before looking back at the sky that is torn apart every second that passed. “With the world ending, there’s nothing anyone wants more than spending time with their loved ones. I know I would do the same.” She could feel Luther’s eyes on her as she said that. “Cherish the time you have left together, okay?” That were the last words she uttered before she went back inside the building, leaving the newlywed to have their moments alone.

What she didn’t know was the fact that Ben was listening to her words as he finally succeed to get rid of Klaus’s presence. He was about to grab another drink when he heard her saying that. Spending time with their loved ones. What is left of his family are only Sloane and Reginald. One who is currently with the man of her life. The other one probably conspiring something against someone. Sloane, his sister, what left of his bunch of adoptive siblings, sure there’s a part of him that cares for her although he won’t admit it out loud. On the other side, Reginald doesn’t deserve any love from anyone in the building. An ounce of him may won’t stop trying to prove himself to the guy but he’s sure that there is no love that he holds for the old man.

Before the girl who just entered the building could fully walk passed him, he grabbed her wrist, stopping her in her tracks. She looked at him expectedly, a look of nostalgia flashed for a second. Perhaps it’s the alcohol talking, but the words come out of his mouth without permission at all. “Want a drink?”

She let her hand out of his grasp, raising one of her eyebrows. “Did Klaus really manage to talk some sense into you? Or is it the alcohol talking?” She paused before answering the real question. “The answer’s yes by the way. But not here. Let’s go somewhere else.”

***

“A windowsill?”

“A quite spacious one, yeah.” She put herself in a comfortable position before patting the space in front of her. “Come on. There’s still much room left here.” Rolling his eyes slightly, he sighed before sitting in front of her. Both of them facing each other, on the windowsill as the world out there is falling apart. Her gaze stayed on him as he sat there trying to search for a comfortable position. A nostalgic smile went onto her face. Happiness and sadness all become one as a glimpse of her Ben took over his position for some split second.

A memory from her past.

“Out of every place in this goddamn hotel, you-“ He began to complain.

“Hey, the world is falling apart. Be grateful for a few seconds.” She looked out the window. “Ben would’ve loved this.” She muttered loud enough for him to hear.

“I am Ben.”

“Well, not you. I mean Ben Ben.”

“The other Ben?”

“No. You’re the—Can you just drink it already and try to not be an asshole?” She almost forced the alcohol down his throat if it weren’t for him who already doing that as she spoke before. She looked at him before averting her attention to her glass, muttering under her breath. “Maybe this is a bad idea.”

“Not really. No.” His response caught her off guard as she wasn’t expecting him to even hear her. She pursed her lips, before taking a sip from her glass. “So you do need some company. Is this your attempt to not be alone at the end of the world? Was it because of the speech I gave earlier?” She put it down and then propped her chin on the top of her knee.

This time, he is the one that avoids her gaze, looking at the falling word around them from the window. “I thought you said it didn’t work on me.”

“Just because my powers don’t work on you. Doesn’t mean I’m an idiot who cannot connect the two dots together, emo boy.” She said.

He looks down for a few moments before looking back at her, an uncharacteristic look on his face. “Guess that—guess that makes me a special emo boy or what?” This time he didn’t complain about the nickname. Instead, he said the words that brings a smile to her face. She nodded slowly before leaning back to the window frame and with teary eyes she lets out a chuckle. “What?” He asked, raising one of his eyebrows.

“You’re making it difficult for me to not cry. You see, you’re not supposed to say that. Not with that face.” She paused, taking a deep breath trying to not let the tears out just yet. “Gosh, you don’t just look like him or sound like him. Now, you talked like him. I suppose my prayers are granted in a way. I see you again now. Breathing and alive. Just not—just not the you that I need. It hurts looking into your eyes when all I see is him and yet there is no trace of him in this falling world.”

“What was he like?” His gaze stayed on her, less tense than usual. “Truly. What was he like?” He asked once more.

“What did the others say?” She asked back.

Hesitantly, he answered her question. “He was……kind. Selfless. A tiny dark cloud on a perfect sunny day. A know-it-all. A scold. Most of them-Most of them are bad qualities.” He furrowed his eyebrows together and seems to be frustrated not being able to decipher why the other Ben was so special compared to him. “I’m the Number One. Numero Uno. He wasn’t, was he? All of those praises about him, look how he ended up 6 feet under.”

Brushing over his last comment, she nodded her head. “Well all of them are true. He was a great guy, wasn’t he? One of the best that I ever knew.” Her eyes trailed over the window. “I first met them all when I was around the age of 8 or 9. He was hiding behind Klaus or Number 4 at that moment. He was never been the one to love the public attention but somehow tried to gain mine. I suppose that makes him sweet. After his death, none of us have been the same. All of us were drowning in a sense, well we all have been drowning for a long time. But since that happened, none of us could ever reach the shore.” Her chest got heavy just from thinking of that feeling.

“Where are you now?” He inched closer towards her.

She pursed her lips before letting out a deep breath. “Just floating around, I guess? Not drowning but not completely free either.” She thought about her last interaction with Ben. “Perhaps this is it. With the world ending, I’m getting closer to my final destination.”

Looking back at him, she continued her words. “Ben. He was-He was easier to love out of everyone in that room earlier, out of all the people I’ve known in my whole life. And mind you remember this, I love all of them greatly—well not all of them,” She referred to Reginald. “We all have a fair share of memories together, mostly in our youthful days that are full of trauma created by your daddy dearest—even I had some of mine too and I’m not even a Hargreeves.” Both of them chuckled at her words.

“Very much relatable that last bit. Klaus said a similar thing earlier. About how he was easier to love.” Ben inched closer once more, perhaps this is the alcohol talking, but seeing him open up his feelings to her like this makes her pay no mind to the fact that by tomorrow he’ll probably change into hard-shell Ben again. “That doesn’t seem fair. All of you love him like that yet none can do the same for me.”

Biting back a snarky remark, she decided to say something else instead. “One thing about him is that he makes love seem to be a casual thing to feel, I mean it is, truthfully it is but not many people have the opportunity to realize that.” She wiped a single tear away. “There are a lot of things to pay for when it comes to love. To any kind of love. Meeting you is one of those. The price I have to pay for this moment is not a kind one.”

He nodded quietly before looking back directly into her eyes. “I’m not him, you know?”

She chuckled at his words. “Of course, you’re not. I’ve said that already. If yes then I won’t be just sitting in front of you right now.” I would hold you and never let go like you had wished once before your last moments. The last part remained in her mind. Glimpses of them together flowed around the two, yet she was the only one to remember. “It is a lonely thing, isn’t it? To remember when the other person doesn’t.”

“What if……the other person does?” Her head snapped back towards him as he said so. Letting out a shuddered breath, she opened her mouth to ask what he means by that but she wasn’t able to find her voice at all. Then he continued his words. “You know what sucks, you have all of these memories with your Ben and I-” He took a glance at the sky before looking back at her. “And the only recollection I have about you is the one I had in my dreams. The one that I forgot the moment that I woke up. The one I wished to remember because there’s this feeling that I can’t understand every time I am in that dream.”

“You said all you see when you look into my eyes are him. Yet when I see into yours all I see is you. No other version you. Just you you cause you’re the same one from my dreams. The dreams that left only glimpses in my memory. But then even in those dreams, you were with him, I suppose. That happy feeling was his feelings, it was never mine, to begin with. All this time I was dreaming of someone else’s memories.” Tears stream down her face as she takes in the look in his eyes, the same look he used to give her.

This Ben would never be her Ben. He was already gone from her world. Leaving nothing but the memories that remain in her heart. Nothing but the feeling that she would always feel till the moment she passed. Meeting this Ben had brought heavy feelings to her heart. Makes her yearn to see a glimpse of him in his eyes. And when she found what she was looking for, hurt was all she found. “I’m sorry, Ben.”

He smiled bitterly. “Out of everyone, I thought you hated me the most.” He said. Recalling her avoiding him at all cost during their first interactions when the Umbrella first comes back to the timeline. The look in her eyes when she first laid her gaze on him was one that he will not forget.

She looked at him with sadness in her eyes. “That is an ability that I am not capable of. I cannot afford that. I don’t think I could even if I tried. You’re too much like him. Any version of you they all-well, I’ve only met two of you but you’re much more alike than I thought you do. Your feelings. The way both of you feel, I found it beautiful.”

A comfortable silence engulfed both of them as the two leaned back to the window frame simultaneously. The world is still falling around them. Slowly fading away from reality. Most people are already gone, reuniting with their loved ones on the other side.

“You were right.” His voice makes her look back at him. He offered the palm of his hand to her, so she made up a scissor using her point and middle finger. “I won.” She said with a large smile on her face.

Ben rolled his eyes. “You’re so childish. I couldn’t see why he loved you so much.” He said, clearly lying.

She crossed her arms. “Oh, the alcohol finally worn out? I was enjoying the non-asshole you.”

“Oh shut up.” He hushed her.

“What was I right about?” She waited for his response.

He met her eyes once more. She could tell that he was hesitant about it. “With the world ending, there’s nothing anyone wants more than spending time with their loved ones. Any kind of love.” Her eyes stayed locked with him as she reached for his palm once more, a warm smile on her face.

“Any kind of love.” She replied back.

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new story concept

taglist! @glxssyhexrts @isimpforeveryone @pinkcherrytea @ray-of-sunrise @lodeddiperrodrick @ttaeh @birbtweettweet @gordona424 @wyrd01366 @pro-serpine @bryannabarradas @justaproudslytherpuff @tasmtrilogy @ac-book-nerd-13 @nao-cchi @jasmines-greentea @s1xthirty @corallyink @frxnchxfrxes @sunnsettee @avengersmarauders @glitter-and-gills @ladyofhellhounds @missbeverlyhills @nellie-mars @middle-child-syndrome701 @ttynatmyo @neotechclub @rogerslaufeysonn @divinekokomis @thebloodrobin @hiraeth-maximoff @maizieval @angel0signal @joyfullyswimmingface @kim-an-44 @morecthh @grievingghost @enviousofyoualways @iodinexo @bumbelbeeesblog @r0zu0 @iamyourgender @junsfilter @cherrychaeryoung @ajdahak @bebyyyyyy @sstellari @prissyimagines

#ben hargreeves #ben hargreeves x reader #the umbrella academy #the umbrella academy x reader #ben hargreeves angst #ben hargreeves fluff #the sparrow academy #sparrow ben hargreeves x reader #sparrow ben hargreeves #ben hargreeves imagine #the umbrella academy imagine #angst #heartwarming #song inspired #glimpse of us #tua #joji #sparrow ben x reader

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theprojectava · 1 year

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Weak.

"But I'm weak. And what's wrong with that? Boy, oh boy, I love it when I fall for that." - Weak by AJR

Another redo of one of my earlier sheith pieces :) I'm drawing a lot of new stuff recently, but I like to revisit some of the older sheith art I made and redraw them, just to see what kind of feels it gives me. And man do these two still give me the feels.

#voltron #sheith #shiro voltron #keith voltron #takashi shirogane #keith kogane #voltron legendary defender #vld #fanart #drawing #garrison!sheith #garrison keith #garrison shiro #song inspired #redraw

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heyidkyay · 1 year

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And if it weren't this dark |

(Tip of the tongue but I can't deliver it properly)

Part One

A/N: hey, a short Alex one for you! it's been in my drafts for a while now, and isn't proofread but I figured I'd just post it and see if anyone likes it, first time writing for him so bare with me..

Summary: You and Alex have been together for ages and it's been so incredible, only now things have changed and you're struggling to tell him just how you feel.

Warning: angst- but also a bit of fluff so, lack of communication

Part Two

I’d been dropping hints.

JESUS CHRIST had I been dropping hints.

There wasn’t a day gone by that I hadn’t thought about it finally happening. But as I mentioned, I’d been dropping hints only, they hadn’t been hitting.

So either I was relatively shit at this whole charade or… Alex was just utterly clueless.

I was leaning more towards the latter. But maybe I was simply biased, because over the last coming weeks my hints hadn’t been all that subtle.

I mean, only the other day we’d been on the way to my sister’s house for tea- she’d recently gotten engaged and mum had wanted to celebrate the only way my family really knew how. With good food.

But neither Alex or I had remembered to pick up the wine we’d promised beforehand, and so we’d popped into the local Tesco’s on the drive over to pick up a few bottles. And whilst we’d been perusing- as you do- we’d somehow found ourselves wandering down the baby aisle.

Yes, the baby aisle. Because that was what I’d been waiting on. A baby. Or rather, a fucking good shag that then led to a baby.

Because, let’s be honest, I really wasn’t one to turn down a good time, far from, but these last few weeks there had been something else I’d been rather hoping for.

Everyone (and I mean everyone!!) around us was either settling down, buying homes, building families, or getting engaged. And Alex and I, well we’d been together for years and yet, nothing.

No ring. No big day planned. No talks of the future. Nada.

Nothing.

And I could honestly say that I wasn’t the type that needed that kind of security voiced or announced.

Truly.

When Alex and I had first gotten together, I’d only realised that we were properly seeing each other when some other lad at a house party had tried to pull me. I’d never seen Alex so possessive, and it had been proper cute and a tad bit funny in the moment. He’d ‘staked his claim’- how cliche and chauvinistic, yes I know- but that was what had quickly taken us from Y/n and Alex, to Y/nandAlex. Which had suited me quite fine.

So yeah, him and I, since then had always sort of relied on our actions to simply show how we were feeling.

Like when we’d first moved in together. There’d not been much of a discussion about it, my flat had quickly become the first place Alex would come back to after touring, his stuff had just started taking up space- washing in the dryer, dirty trainers in the hallway- and then he’d started calling it home. ‘Let’s head home, shall we?’ and ‘We’ll be home soon, darling.’

And that was all lovely. I adored having that kind of connection with him.

But there were times when I desperately wished he would open up a little more about what he was thinking. Because although I could read him like an open book most days- his emotions especially- there were far and few times in between when I just felt so lost.

Like recently, I supposed.

I feel like we’ve been on the same page for so long, only now I’m ready to turn anew, start another chapter. Together.

But Alex? I have no fucking clue what he wants.

In all honesty, I think he’d be rather content to just carry on as we have been for the rest of eternity. No talk, no hashing things out. Have Christmas dinner with his parents, spend Boxing Day with mine. New Years in London, back home in time for spring. Same order from the local kebab, Friday nights stay reserved for one another.

And that would be it.

Lost to this routine.

Not that I was expecting a proposal or some grand gesture. I wasn’t much into the idea of any of that! No, just- I wanted more, you know?

I wanted that family I’d always dreamt about, that house we’d quickly make a home. I wanted nappies and nightly feeds, baby-grows which then turned into dungarees. Ten tiny little toes, someone with a cute button nose, a person made up of both him and I.

But I just didn’t know when that would happen, or if it ever would.

So yeah- Tesco’s. Fuck, did I love to ramble! If Alex could only hear me now I supposed.

So, as I was saying, we’d been stood in the baby aisle, Alex scrolling through his phone aimlessly, waiting for my dad to text him back a reply after we’d asked if they’d needed anything else whilst we were out. And me, staring starry eyed at the tiny socks and mittens and cute little newborn tees that were on display.

I’d said to him, almost thoughtlessly, “Imagine us having to buy all this. All these tiny little things.”

He’d just glanced up at me, smiled, hummed. Then replied, “Your dad asked if you’d pick him up some of that heartburn medication he buys. Says his acid reflux is playing up again.”

And hadn’t that just been grand? Mentioning my father’s gastrointestinal issues whilst we’d been stood surrounded by adorable little baby items, with me unsubtly referencing the image of US buying some for OUR child in the (now very obvious and very, very far) future.

Incredibly clued in, my Alex.

That hadn’t even been the worst of it though.

A few weeks back, my friend had mentioned that her and her fiancé were actively trying to conceive and I’d been so over the moon for the pair of them. All excited about the chance of having another baby to spoil rotten.

And Alex, he had been all smiles whilst congratulating them, sat comfortably beside me, but when I’d brought it up again on the drive home, he’d simply shrugged it off as though it was a thing that occurred every other day.

Your mates starting a family. Nothing too out of the ordinary there, at least not to Alex.

It had royally pissed me off in truth.

And I’d been a little off with him ever since, I think he knew it too.

“Love?”

I blinked out of the daze I’d let myself get lost in and looked away from the laptop screen I’d been staring at for the last, however long. I hummed quietly to him in reply, titling my head against the cushions and over towards where he was stood in the doorway.

“Been calling your name for a while now, you alright?” He quirked a brow up at me, a smug little smile limning his lips as he leant against the frame. He didn’t even know how good he looked.

I nodded with a small smile then glanced away, back towards the email I’d just been typing. “‘M fine. Just need to get this done.”

Alex said nothing but I heard the soft shuffle of his socked feet across our wooden floors before the settee dipped beside me. He rested his chin against my shoulder, peering down at the screen.

“Just wanted to know what you fancied for tea.” Alex murmured, breath brushing against the skin of my neck. I withheld a shiver. “Figured we could order from that place round the corner.”

I rolled my lip against the other, pushing my glasses up my nose before I wrote another passage, honing all of my focus on finishing this email so that I could finally just relax for the evening.

“Whatever you want, Al. I’m not all that fussed.”

Alex leant away from me slightly, back pressing against the settee cushions, he stayed that way for a while and I could feel his presence as I continued to type away. It was only a short time later that I grinned triumphantly down at the laptop and clicked send, thankful to have it gone and out of my mind.

“All done, cherry?”

Smiling at the familiar petname, my eyes flickered over towards him. I took in the woollen jumper he wore, as well as his hair which was tousled and unkept, probably from having run his hands through it all day. I was only just able to stop myself from reaching out to tangle my fingers in it, wanting to smooth it over.

“All done.” I murmured faintly and gifted him a tired smile.

Alex was the type to take something and run with it though, so I wasn’t all that surprised when he grinned right back at me and extended a hand out to cradle my left cheek. I leaned into his warmth for a second, allowing his thumb to brush the skin under my eye, probably from where today’s makeup had just begun to smudge.

I inhaled after and slowly pulled away. Not paying much mind to the way Alex slumped slightly and instead opting to busy myself with putting away my laptop and clearing up the mess I’d made of the coffee table.

I did it all quietly, picking up the two mugs of tea I’d made, one empty, the other barely touched from where I’d forgotten about it, whilst Alex watched on. The tele remote was perched on the very edge of the table and so I tossed it over towards him, padding my way into the kitchen.

“Put something on, will you? Think there’s a good film on Channel 5.” I prompted over my shoulder, glancing at him through the tramson window that had been installed shortly after the sink had sprung a leak during last tour and flooded the flat, forcing us to make do whilst the owner had remodelled.

Pressing the power up button, Alex flipped the remote around in his hand a couple of times, he looked deep in thought and so I left him be, choosing to wash up the two mugs as well as the few stray knives and forks which littered the basin.

I hummed quietly to myself, an old song I could hardly recall the lyrics of, whilst I worked, thinking about the many things I had to get done before the weekend started.

It was Alex’s voice which startled me from my musings actually. He was so much closer now than he’d been before when he spoke up again, I'd obviously not heard his approach.

“So, tea?” Alex questioned me with a slight furrow between his brows, he’d propped himself up against the kitchen counter about an arms width away.

“God, Al! What are you- a wraith? Don’t sneak up on me like that!” I scolded, having jumped out of my skin. I took a deep breath. “Could’ve had a heart attack or something over the kitchen sink.”

Alex chuckled lowly at me, clearly amused by my reaction, he shook his head. “Make headlines, you- woman dies whilst doing the washing up! Reckon it’ll lead to a riot- start up a petition that’ll change the way we wash dishes forever.”

I rolled my eyes, flicking a few soap duds at him in retaliation which only made him reach out towards me. I tried to evade him but he was too quick, sweeping and wrapping me up in his arms so that I couldn’t proceed to splash him any further.

“You always been this much of a weirdo?” I huffed, not making much of an effort to escape his hold even as I struggled to blow a strand of hair out of my face.

He hummed, smiling down at me as we begun to sway. “Might’ve been. No getting rid of me now that you’ve finally realised it though.”

I playfully winced in retort, forcing out a loud put-upon sigh. “Should’ve just kept quiet and slipped out once you’d fallen asleep watching the tele.”

Alex narrowed his eyes at me, tugging me in tighter. “As if you would.” He taunted.

I simply smirked in retort and let my damp hands work their way under the soft material of his jumper. I cackled loudly at the way he shivered and jumped away from me like a frightened cat during a thunderstorm.

“Ah, you’re in for it!” Alex declared, his face a right picture.

Quick as I could, I dived to my left so that I could position the kitchen counter between us, bracing myself against it to grin over at him. “Should’ve thought twice about that before telling me what to do, Turner.”

“Minx.” Alex smirked, and then he pounced.

We spent the next however long running about the flat after that.

He’d somehow been able to grab at me in the hallway but I’d thankfully managed to wrangle my way out of his hold, sprinting into our room to use the bed to my advantage. I rolled over it, putting a dent in the freshly made sheets but using the spare moment to take a couple- much needed- deep breaths whilst Alex waltzed slowly inside. I scowled when the door closed behind him. He flashed me a victorious smile.

“Unfair. I’m at a disadvantage.” I pouted, hoping it would soften him slightly. But when that didn’t work I resorted back to a narrow eyed glare. “Open the door, Alex.”

“I don’t think so, Angel-face. You see, I’ve got you cornered.”

I looked for another escape, Alex only growing nearer, but my only options were limited. I could either goad him and then dart towards the door, or dive out the window.

Seeing as though I didn’t much fancy breaking my neck, I opted for the former.

“Come on, Al.” I chuckled breathlessly, perching precariously on the edge of the mattress in hopes of lowering his defences a little. “We’ve had fun, but I’m proper knackered now. Call it quits so we can have a cuddle?”

Alex glanced over at me warily, he knew me far too well but appeared to be on the verge of agreement. He slowly made his way over towards the bed, shoulders hunched, still on his guard.

“Promise?”

I hummed my vague assent, smiling up at him softly.

He paused with squinted eyes, “You’ve gotta verbalise it, love. Don’t count otherwise.”

I tilted my head up at him, feigning confusion. But we both knew I wouldn’t say it unless I really meant it. I kept my word.

That little flaw of mine seemed to trip me up though, and we both realised it at the same time too. So as I manoeuvred my way towards the door- feeling like Kim Possible, might I add- Alex was already in motion, catching me by the hips before I could even surpass the foot of the bed.

“Alex!” I screamed, only growing louder when he threw me over his shoulder and span us around. “Put me down! Now!”

“I fucking knew it!” Alex laughed merrily, bouncing me about the place. I swatted at his back unhappily, starting to feel my stomach in my throat. “Knew you’d try something.”

“Yeah, yeah… proper clever, you. Can you put me fucking down now? Think I’m gonna yosh.”

I could only roll my eyes when he dropped me on my arse, although thankfully it was on the mattress. Huffing, I fought to tame the mess he’d probably made of my hair.

“Twat.”

Alex merely chuckled, leaning in close to tuck a strand of stray hair behind my ear. I smiled when he pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead. “I’m sorry, baby.”

“Hm, so you say.” I replied, peering up at him from where he towered over me, his hand falling to frame my jaw.

He leant in again, smiling as his lips met mine. “Had to show you who’s boss, didn’t I? Couldn’t let you get away with that.”

I gave an airy titter, pushing him away so that I could pull myself to my feet. “I could’ve had you on your arse the second you strolled in here, was just playing fair.”

He caught my wrist before I could retreat back into the living room, encasing my hand in his. I frowned slightly, looking back at him, mainly confused.

“What’s up?” I questioned him. His brown eyes flickered back and forth between my own, he looked conflicted all of a sudden, it was something you didn’t see on Alex too often which caused my frown to deepen, “Alex?” I prodded.

A small sigh escaped him and his gaze fell towards our joined hands, I let my thumb brush against the back of his own, wanting to reassure him in some way.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” I asked again, stepping closer. My other hand braced his forearm.

Alex’s eyes found mine once more and I didn’t think I had ever seen him this torn up. It threw me a bit, his demeanour had changed so quickly, it was like he’d done a total one-eighty on me.

“Think I should be asking you that question.”

I frowned at Alex’s vague reply.

“What do you mean? I’m fine, Alex. Annoyed that you won, but I’ll get you the next time.” I assured him, chuckling softly at the end. But it didn’t seem to do much.

Alex just shook his head, stepping away towards the window. He dragged a hand across his face, rubbing at his chin whilst he gazed down at the street below.

“Al…” I tried. “Alex. Will you look at me?”

His eyes fell shut, he squeezed them as though he was trying to sort through a messy array of thoughts, of emotions.

Then he sighed. “I just don’t get you sometimes. One second you’re off with me, hardly even have the time to spare a glance my way. Then the next, we’re as happy as Larry, dancing about the kitchen, play-fighting, laughing.”

I had to look away, down towards my feet as a surge of guilt rippled through me. It wasn’t Alex’s fault that he had no idea about all the thoughts that were raging about inside my head. It wasn’t his fault that I was too scared to just come out with it. To tell him what I so does wanted. To just talk to him.

None of the blame was on him and yet, I’d still placed it all there.

“I’m sorry.” I said, slumping down onto the edge of the mattress with a sigh. My eyes trailed over to find him staring back, his face gave nothing away. “I’ve been an utter twat. And I’ve been so fucking unfair to you. I- I don’t know, Al. I’ve just been struggling with a lot lately. But it really is nothing that you’ve done.”

Alex released a long breath, thumbing the bridge of his nose before he walked towards the bed, taking a seat beside me. We sat there in silence for a few moments, I could feel my heart hammering in my throat. Because it really was now or never. I either told him or… I got over myself. And nothing would change.

“You say you’ve been struggling.”

I angled my head over towards him upon hearing his words, Alex continued to look onwards though, his hands clasped between his knees.

He looked a lot older in that moment, and it reminded me of just how long we’d been together. I could recall a similar moment we’d shared well over a decade ago now, just before the band’s very first London gig.

Alex had spent weeks torturing himself over it, figuring that they’d be wasting their time playing to an empty room.

It had been the night before they’d been set to leave when he’d come round mine. It’d been late. Really late, as in only mere hours before the train he’d been expected on was set to depart.

It had just been the two of us. But that hadn’t ever been an unusual occurrence. We’d sat in silence together for a longwhile on my messy bedsheets- he’d always been the type to struggle with words. Strange for a songwriter, yeah, but unless they were accompanied by a couple chords then Alex could honestly spend a millennia searching for the right ones to use if you’d let him.

He had spoken up eventually though. Told me what was bugging him. And I’d been the one to try and right every bad thought he’d had. Dull his racing mind.

I’d always very much doubted his fears, about no one wanting to listen to their music outside of Sheffield. Outside of the safety net we’d grown up in. But Alex was as stubborn as I was, and so we’d spent a lot of late nights arguing about it. We’d always make up for it though come morning.

And Alex had gone, obviously. I’d been one of the few to see the band off that morning, waving goodbye even as the train blurred and disappeared out of sight. He’d phoned me later that night after the gig, I’d heard his smile, he’d gone on this long rant about how wrong he’d been. Because the pillock had only gone and gotten carried around the venue on a sea of hands, hadn’t he?

This moment didn’t feel quite the same though. Because these fears I’d been facing, well they didn’t threaten anything outside of the four walls we’d carved for ourselves. If I told him how I felt, there was a very big chance that he might not feel the same, want the same. There was a very real chance he could just walk away.

“If it’s been so bad. Why didn’t you just come to me?” Alex asked and his eyes found mine then, that warm brown of his appeared so oddly defeated. So much so, I struggled to find a reply.

“Just come out with it. Please. ‘Cause all this up and down, and back and forth. I don’t know if I can take much more. It’s been driving me round the bend. I hate reaching out towards you and feeling you pull further away. Kills me. Hate feeling like there’s something standing between us. ‘Cause it’s never been that way. Not with me and you.”

My throat grew tight with tears, but I wouldn’t cry, not now. Not when it was me who had caused all this.

“I know.” I had to take a deep breath to keep them at bay. To hide the strain in my voice. I pivoted so that my knee folded beneath me and I could really see his face. He followed, taking ahold of my hands. “I know, and I am sorry. Truly. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything earlier. That I let it get this bad. That I let you get so torn up. I didn’t even realise.”

Alex pulled me into an embrace, hand holding the back of my neck as I buried my face in his. Because that was the man Alex was, he put me above everything else. Including himself.

“It’s fine, sweetheart.” He hushed, thumb brushing over the top of my spine. “You can tell me anything. You know that.”

I did know that. But still.

“I don’t want to lose you, Alex.”

That probably hadn’t been the best thing to say. Alex all but flung himself back, alarm swimming in his eyes as he levelled me with a long look.

“Lose me? What’s that meant to mean? Why would you lose me?”

A tear fell then, followed by a couple more. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut, willing them away, hating the thought of seeing him so distraught.

“Y/n. Love. Please, you’re actually beginning to scare me now. Tell me what’s happened.”

I tried to look away. I didn’t want to do this, not here not now, but his fingers grasped my chin, tugging me back to face him.

A sob spilled from my lips and I crumpled slightly, his hands jumped up to my shoulders, struggling to hold me up.

“What could have you this worked up?” He stressed, shaking me slightly. “Just tell me, because all the fucking things I’ve got racing through my head. I- Put me out of my misery at least. Please.”

It took all the strength I had to peer up at him, eyes red and raw. “I want more, Alex. I want more than just this.”

After I’d said it, I wanted to take all my words back. The hurt that flashed across his face felt like a sharp slap to mine. He started to move, to stand. And I realised he was about to leave.

“Al. Alex.” I called, tried. Clutching at his arm. “Alex, please! Just listen, will you?”

He wasn’t having it. Shaking his head at me as he stormed his way out of the bedroom.

“I can’t believe you’ve just said that.”

It was like a punch to the gut, hearing the upset that lined his voice. His back was to me as I chased after him, I’d ever seen him like this.

“I didn’t mean it! Not like that! Not in the way it sounded.”

“Like fuck you didn’t mean it, Y/n!” Alex shouted, and I caught a glimpse of his face when he went to tug his jacket off the hanger by the front door.

I could count the times I’d seen Alex cry on one hand. But right then, there were tears in his eyes.

“Alex.” I pleaded with him.

A deathly silence fell between us, I watched his shoulders sag before he turned back around towards me. I wanted nothing more than to hold him again. Take away all his pain, the pain I’d caused.

“If you leave right now, I’ll never forgive you.” I choked out, “Please don’t leave. Please.”

He stared at me. Long and hard.

“Tell me the truth then.”

His voice was nothing but a strained whisper. He looked so tired, arms slumped helplessly by his sides.

I swallowed thickly. Hands fisted against my chest.

Alex scoffed at me then and ran a hand over his face, rubbing at his stinging eyes. He shook his head and went for the latch.

I felt my eyes fall close. It was now or never, I supposed. He was leaving either way.

“I want a baby, Alex.”

#Alex turner #alex turner x you #alex turner x reader #alex turner x y/n #arctic monkeys #Arctic monkeys band #ao3 #writer #fic #short work #angst #fluff #alex turner fanfic #alex turner fluff #relationship #longterm relationship #song inspired #babies #fanfic

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